#look at me ive become the very thing i despise

[strawberryking]

Either i have created a grave sin in making this or the universe personally guided my hand. Not sure which. Maybe both

[erwinsvow]

ive been rereading ur bitchy reader stuffs n pleek do more of the pope cameo.. HER SAYING DICK APPT WHEN RAFE COMPLAINED ABT HER HAVING POPES NUMBER MADE ME GIGGLE OUT LOUD pretty please give us more of them 🤲

i imagine her being pissed off at rafe so she keeps giving him the cold shoulder and when he asks something she’d just go “maybe i should’ve gone to heywards instead he wont treat me like this 🙄” BUT ITS SO FUNNY KNOWING SHE DOESNT LIKE POGUES !!!!

LMFAOOO THIS IS KILLING ME!! one thing about my readers, their secret pogue crush is always gonna be pope <3

one thing you had in common with rafe—despite the glaring differences that were so hard to ignore—was that you both didn't care much for pogues.

that was putting it lightly, rafe despised them and you just didn't like them. but some were more tolerable than others—for example, the maybank boy who seemed to you the equivalent of a toddler with sticky hands versus pope heyward, who used to tutor in math. you don't know why or how they're friends, just that you like pope enough to be friendly, or rather polite, and you definitely don't like maybank enough to even think about him.

rafe didn't like any of them, and you didn't really care. you weren't in the habit of defending pogues, and certainly not when you were constantly trying to remind sarah to stay away from them, even though she never listened.

but seeing how angry rafe seemed to get at the mere mention was enough to give you some ideas. when you had jokingly—although now you remember you hadn't really ever clarified—said that you had pope's number because of dick appointments, rafe had gotten so angry it had resulted in the best sex of your life.

you were curious to know what else you could get out of it. unfortunately, your curiosity didn't last for very long. rafe pissed you off just as much as you pissed him off, and though these thoughts were often in one ear and out the other for you.

like today. you had been waiting for twenty whole minutes at the club for rafe, who had insisted he would be on time even though you knew he would probably run late since he was coming from barry's—all the way across town.

all he had to do was admit it, and you would have come later, but instead he had told you to show up at noon and that he wasn't going to be late.

normally you would show up at half past and just tell him to fuck off, but if he really was on time you would never hear the end of it. so you showed up on time and waited... and waited.

rafe finally shows up about forty minutes later, and you stare at him with your signature look—eyes rolling back, an i-told-you-so expression with arms crossed. you could make it more withering if you wanted, but right now you just wanted to hear rafe admit he was wrong.

"shut the fuck up," he says, taking a seat the table. your half drunken diet coke has left a ring of condensation, and you move the cup towards you, wondering how you'd become the kind of girl that waits forty minutes for a guy to show up.

"first of all, i didn't even say anything. second of all, you shut the fuck up. i'm the one who was forty-fucking-minutes late."

"it took longer-"

"longer than you thought? yeah, i said that. yesteday."

"well m'here now, so just order."

you huff, scanning the menu and not sure exactly what retort to use. instead you settle for shutting up entirely, not speaking to rafe the entire time. the waitress comes and goes, the food comes and goes, and you look up when rafe speaks but don't say anything back.

rafe thinks you'll give it up once lunch is over, but you grew up in a household where an hour of silent treatment is child's play. so the car ride to tannyhill, throughout the movie you put on and when you walk away to make popcorn, you haven't said a word.

while the movie credits roll, you look down at your phone, waiting for your apology and deciding when to leave if you don't get it.

"are you seriously gonna ignore me the entire day?"

you stare at rafe, not answering. this is your withering look.

"fine, princess. your choice," rafe shrugs. "finally got you to shut up for once."

you take a moment for his words to really hit you. like any other girl in the world, that comment from your boyfriend hurts a little. it even stings. you don't like the words in the air and you can even tell it left a bitter taste in rafe's mouth. he looks like he's just realizing he overstepped a little. then, for the first time since you saw rafe that day, you speak.

"you know, it's a good thing i didn't delete heyward's number from my phone. times like this i realize how handy it can be."

"what the fuck is th-"

"i mean, really, rafe. even these pogues you hate so much would treat me better than you do. i should go call him up now-"

"okay, princess i get it-"

"bet he'd probably fuck me better than-"

"okay, enough. jesus, i get it. m'sorry, okay? can you knock it off now?"

"i'm not knocking anything off. and you can go fuck yourself if you can't apologize for a little thing like being late-"

"i'm sorry, okay? now can you stop talking about pope fuckin' heyward?" you huff, finally a little pleased he apologized.

"thank you. was that so hard?"

"oh shut up-"

"you shut up. and don't be late again. or i'll show you fuckin' heyward-"

"enough!"

[vtoriacore]

✧ all eyes on you

note: this gotta be my fave vil piece ive ever written god damn i think this is me at my peak with writing. ill never write so well again and that sucks 💀 this is like 2.4k words and i swear half of it is vils outfit description /j someone also tell me why this is becoming a vil cantered blog LMAO

warning: slightly suggestive? bit of kissing at the end but nothing explicit! some jealousy that could be interpreted as slightly yandere/toxic but not really. gn!reader

synopsis: i cannot be bothered coming up with something elaborate after writing this. -> you're in a club. you dance w a random person. vil sees you. lights camera action bestie, the stage is yours to share and exit to the very end.

reblogs much appreciated, mwah 💞💓

He's already had too much Hennessy, he knew it. But looking at you through his translucent, violet sun glasses (perfectly matching his alluring eyes) he couldn't help but want to drink you in even more. It was no surprise you were here, in the same damn exclusive club as him, dancing with some nobody - no chemistry, no feelings attached.

He gripped the glass tighter, sharp lavender nails digging into his palm enough to leave marks. The sight was nothing short of infuriating, and he wanted to do nothing more but to rip you away from the leech vying for your attention when it should only be on him. Slamming the drink onto the table with a low growl, he stood up, all eyes immediately on him.

And why wouldn't they be? As always, he was the best dressed on the scene - the rich lilac, laced, mini slip-dress perfectly hugging his curves and off shoulder matching bolero cardigan accentuating his clavicles. And with every click of his six inch plum coloured t-strap d'orsay platforms (perfectly matching the beat of the current song) he grew more and more aware of the irony of the scene; virtually everyone was admiring his form, none of whom he would spare a single glance, but you.

Golden, diamond shaped earrings jangling as he walked (something he found rather irritating the more he focused on it), Vil tucked his purse closer to his side with a nonchalant flip of his platinum blonde locks. Normally, he'd feel very confident with his stature and mannerisms, but the way you still haven't graced him with even a single look, he felt it diminish. Oh, how he hated, down-right despised the effect you had on him! What right did you, so insignificant- ah no, that'd be too harsh considering he only ever silently sought out your approval and affection, but he'd digress. What right did you have making him feel this worthless, when he has never looked better? Never felt better?

The première of this new movie, Vil being the lead protagonist, was supposed to be the best fucking night of his life! He'd already strolled the red carpet as if he owned the event, knowing damn well it wasn't the truth because even then he was only seeking your eyes and finding them to be on anything but him. How could you disregard him so coldly, even now as he was approaching your form, more restless than ever?

"[Name], fancy seeing you here of all places," voice levelled, Vil addressed you directly; he wanted you to feel nervous under his gaze once you turned, it's what you deserve after causing him this much distress when it was supposed to be his big night. His official debut into the world of heroism.

"Ah, Schoenheit. Of course you'd run into me," he absolutely hated your wording, you were making him seem desparate - and although he was, you had no right even alluding to such thing!

"Disregarding that, it's quite rude not facing someone when they're speaking to you," he felt his nerves almost snap, seeing you turn around only to grace him with a teasing smirk, head tilted and eyes full of recognition.

"What, you miss me checking you out?" you licked your bottom lip, and it drove him almost as insane as your biting remark.

"I have the whole world focused on me, the last thing I'd need is you 'checking' me out," he rolled his eyes, shimmery gold eyeshadow accentuating the gesture.

"And here I thought we'd finally get some privacy so I could admire you," you laughed, and it brought him great satisfaction seeing the person behind you narrow their eyes in discontent. Without so much as a word, they slinked away with a small click of their tongue, something Vil would comment on in a later interview just out of spite. Was it petty? Maybe, but no one disrespects him and gets away with it - especially if they dare affiliate themselves with you.

"Is that what you were hoping for?" Vil raised a perfectly done eyebrow, crossing his arms in the process. He loved the way your eyes momentarily travelled to his chest before meeting his again.

"Sure, we can go with that if it soothes your ego," you looked to the left, observing the crowd watching the interaction with great interest before narrowing your eyes at the person who walked away from you. It irked him that you cared enough about that leech to even remember dancing with them, but your annoyance at them made it worth it - it was a sign you wouldn't seek them out at the very least!

"Interesting you'd say that, seeing your own just got shattered by . . . who was that again? One of the background characters who couldn't act to save their own life?" he knew his perfect, award winning smile would irritate you as always - it was both a great pleasure and a disdain seeing you vexxed by the accusation.

"You're the one who interrupted me, you know," you placed a hand on your hip, staring Vil down (well, up), and his eyes couldn't help but rake over the upper half of your body. He knew it was probably the alcohol doing most of the thinking, but coupled with the ultraviolet lighting , he just couldn't help but wonder how good you'd feel against him in that moment - away from prying eyes of course.

"I did you a favour dear, I assume you've seen them seizing up our director just then?" you merely shrugged at the assertion, instead focusing on your perfectly done nails.

"Yeah I figured they'd try him next, anything for the headlines speculating who they're fucking, no?" you smiled once you finished your unnecessary examination, looking at Vil once more. He couldn't help but let out a low chuckle at the accusation, so genuine it turned a few heads your direction once more. And oh did Vil absolutely relish the envious stares directed your way, knowing damn well none of them could take your place.

"Very bold statement, you do know it's going to make the news and affect my own reputation?" he leaned in, whispering directly into your ear and yet all you could focus on was the gold rimmed necklace with the initials of your first and last name. Once he pulled away, Vil simply smiled - the way you suddenly flushed up made him somewhat giddy. There was no way in hell you'd even direct your gaze on anything other than him for the rest of the night, and the countless rumours of this encounter coupled with the accessory were certainly going to keep you up at night.

"W-well . . . With what you're pulling right now, I could really say the same," he found your aggrevated stutter endearing, simply shrugging as if unaffected by anything you do when the contrary applied.

"You're acting as if it isn't going to be good publicity, with your role as the lead romantic interest, this could be good for both of us," Vil knew you couldn't disagree with this, watching as for once you tried coming up with something to dspute the statement, to no avail.

"Whatever, I've had too much to drink to deal with this," you sighed out, beginning to walk away from him. This of course, wouldn't do - you were once again making him seem as if he were the one that should be following after you.

"Right, goodnight [Name]," he nodded at your back, beginning to turn around only to stop short once he noticed you turn your head, eyes brimming with confusion; it was perfect, you didn't expect a single thing and fell straight for the bait!

" . . . Oh," you furrowed your eyebrows, so softly no one but him would catch on. He was so used to seeing and observing you that by now, Vil had perfectly memorised each and every one of your gestures and mannerisms. This, although something he prided himself on as he was quite perceptive, was simply maddening. His hyper-awareness of having you on his mind too much and for way too long didn't help this fact either.

"What is it?" he was going to get a straightforward answer from you for a change, and he realised you knew it from the little twitch of your lips. You certainly weren't an easy read, to the outsiders of course.

"Well, I just thought . . ." you were reluctant to voice your thoughts, coaxing him into softening his features as silent encouragement - something you picked up on after a few brief seconds.

"I just thought you might want to come somewhere more quiet, with me" you almost whispered, no doubt letting the alcohol affect some of your judgement. Under normal circumstances, Vil knew you'd probably make more sassy remarks but this? You weren't even attempting to make your tone seem insincere, face devoid of your usual show of defiance to anything he does. Such simple action, and yet it had his pulse quicken by too much of a large margin to be considered a normal reaction.

"On second thought, that seems like the perfect remedy for my oncoming headache," he let a faux smile overtake his face, walking closer and closer up to you, until your arms were brushing against each other. To anyone else, it'd simply seem as though the club was too full, but you both knew the intimacy that came with the action - Vil found it unnerving, just how warm it made his face feel when he's already kissed you countless times, both in practice and for the official filming of the scenes. But he did suppose this was something done out of one's volition, so who could realistically fault him for feeling this way?

"You know, absolutely no one uses the corner booths, even though they're all secluded from the main body of the building and perfect to hide away," you spoke up, rather shyly for someone of your disposition, but Vil found it absolutely delightful. Everything he'd done in an effort to get you to himself was finally paying off.

"Well, this is a club for a reason. Most people don't come here to sit around," he purposefully brushed his fingers against yours, the cold, no doubt expensive jewelled rings causing goosebumps to erupt all over your arm.

"Hah, surely they get tired at some point," you playfully rolled your eyes as the both of you walked through a dark archway, music slowly fading to a pleasant, muted buzz.

"Alcohol seems to have the opposite effect it's supposed to when you're clubbing, you'll come to learn soon enough," Vil flashed you a smirk, his cherry red lips catching your attention momentarily before you glanced away. He wondered if he should be happy at your sudden change of personality- was this the real you or just another elaborate show? Either way, he loved it.

"Are you implying something there, Schoenheit?" your teasing, accusatory remark made him click his tongue in a faux display of displeasure before he replied with his own, "Must you analyse every one of my statements?"

"It's not my fault they're usually loaded," your genuine giggle almost made him break the façade.

"How flattering you think me this complex," your smile dropped at that before you turned to fully face Vil, almost catching him off guard as he stopped to mirrror your action with intrigue painting his lilac irises.

"You are," barely two words and he could feel his breath hitch - and the worst part, he didn't even know why! Was it the lack of people around that made this moment feel so intimate? Or was it the courtesy of the dim room with its scarlet lighting making it seem like some romantic scene from a movie?

"You know . . . I still don't understand," you started to speak, voice low yet sincere. He felt himself drawing in a breath but before he could ask anything you spoke up yet again, "Am I overthinking it . . . ?"

"Overthinking what?" it was a miracle he could even speak clearly with how intently you were observing him. He knew he looked perfect, but with your gaze boring so deeply into him, he felt like you could see every flaw - he can't recall a time he felt so vulnerable.

"Ah . . . Nevermind. Ignore me, I wasn't thinking straight," your sudden shake of the head popped the bubble of tension you both felt. Vil felt his eyebrows furrow, a slight pout forming on his face.

"No. You will tell me," he asserted with a hardened resolve, coming ever closer to you as you backed up; his step forward, your step back. Rinse and repeat. Yet when your back had finally hit the ebony wall, you averted your gaze instead of saying anything.

"[Name], I'm serious, don't make me pry it out a different method," Vil leaned in closer to you, grabbing your chin gently to make you look right at him. He'd be damned if he let you slip away now, just when you were about to reveal everything.

"Are you serious, though?" your disappointed gaze had his heart momentarily shatter and before his emotions got the better of him, you once again murmured before he could even breathe, "about me . . .?"

His lips parted, and for the first time in what felt like forever, he felt speechless. Was there even a way for him to convey just how serious he was about you using words, using actions, using feelings alone? Vil could physically feel the pressure of the tension pushing down onto him, and his grip on you loosened.

"I-I see," you closed your eyes in defeat at the silence, and in that very moment he hated himself more than ever.

"I am. Believe me, I am so very serious, so very sure about you. Forgive my silence, I didn't expect to . . . " he trailed off, not thinking straight when you graced him with the sight of your brilliant eyes once more. The surprised flush of your cheeks made him feel slightly nervous; his feelings were out in the open, but would you reciprocate?

He didn't need to ponder the question too long, for in the next moment and without any hesitation, you were pulling him flush against you in an effort to connect your lips. He found himself tilting his head, slipping his sunglasses off with one hand before abandoning them and his purse both on the ground. It didn't matter they were both expensive and about to be ruined, not when the price of your feelings would be too disrespectful to compare to some lousy materialistic items he could replace later.

His hands found purchase on your waist, gently caressing the curvature in an effort to memorise every inch; the way you leaned into him more had him ignoring his burning lungs as they cried out for oxygen. With the way you felt against him, Vil only wanted to breathe you in; everything else be damned. He couldn't deny the disappointment when you had pulled away, but the sight of your burning face and lidded eyes made it worth breaking away anyway.

"I- . . . Damn, I'm sorry," your sudden nervous laugh caused a small smile to rise up on his own flushed face.

"You will be. No one gets away smudging my lipstick darling," you relaxed into Vil's arms at the remark, and he absolutely relished in the bliss of your content gaze and serene demeanor.

"And how do I pay back, hm?" you regained your confidence, but found it quickly simmer down once he spoke again, "Let me smudge yours even more."

You didn't hesitate to pull him back in for a second.

[nebulablakemurphy]

The Queen’s Hand

(Part VII: Birthright)

Summary: Y/N Targaryen is Princess of the seven realms. First born daughter of, Viserys I and Aemma Targaryen. Heir to the iron throne, forced to make impossible decisions to ensure peace amongst the land and the safety of those she holds most dear.

Warning: this chapter includes the birth of Rhaenyra’s daughter who unfortunately does not survive.

Prologue | I | II | III | IV | V | VI

“This is treason and you know it.” Aemmia snaps, her cheeks flush from tears. Her eyes burning with the fire of the dragon.

“I understand that you are upset.” Aemond attempts to gentle his wife, “but you must compose yourself. This is not good for the baby.”

“It is too soon to know if I’m with child!”

“Helaena told me so.”

Aemmia sighs, looking away. Some consider Helaena mad, but Aemmia knows better. Viserys knew things he could not, same as her mother.

“Rhaenyra is the rightful heir. I intend to uphold her claim.” She says, with fierce determination.

“Aemmia, please.” Aemond catches her face in his hand. “I will no longer argue the legitimacy of Rhaenyra’s claim. But the fact remains, my mother and grandsire have set this chain of succession in motion. I cannot stop it. I cannot make Rhaenyra Queen anymore than I can raise my father from the dead. If we do not accept the crown it will pass to Aegon.”

“Aegon cannot be found.” Aemmia steps away from his hold.

“They’ve not been looking very hard.”

“Why not?”

“Because they do not wish to find him.” Aemond confesses. “This is best for everyone. You and I on the throne, the coronation will be peaceful.”

“Aemond, I will not betray my family. If we send for Rhaenyra-”

“If Rhaenyra becomes queen, she will kill my family.”

“Why do you believe this?” Aemmia wonders, have Otto’s lies poisoned him so? “My aunt is not vindictive or cruel. Now she may forbade you from speaking ill against her children, but she would not harm you.”

“Her children have done it before,” Aemond reminds her, “and even you spoke against me.”

“You called them bastards.”

“Are they not?” He challenges.

“They are Targaryens,” Aemmia corrects him, “same as you and I.”

“Hmm.”

“It was you who attacked them.”

“Attacked them? Four against one.” Aemond huffs. “Yet none of them maimed.”

“You tried to kill Jace.”

“I was trying to defend myself.”

“As Lucerys was defending his brother.” She dares him to argue.

“Say what you will, dear wife. But if it were me who harmed one of her children this way, my father would have removed my eye himself and presented it to Rhaenyra on a platter.”

Aemmia reels back at this, “I cannot say if that is true. You knew a much different man than I.”

“Because he loved you.” Aemond says simply. “A privilege I was not afforded.”

“I-”

“When all is said and done it matters not. With us on the throne, we can ensure the safety of your family and mine. You will have the power to unfuck this as you see fit. I cannot give all you ask of me, but I can make you Queen.” Aemond pauses, “Queen of the Andals, the Rhoynar, and the First Men.”

“Why would you do that for me?” Her brow furrows.

“I despised you for years. Feeding into jealousy, unable to understand my father’s devotion to your mother and Rhaenyra’s children over me, his own son. But as I’ve come to know you, I see it a bit differently. We are not so different, two sides of the same coin. I…feel for you.”

“And I for you,” Aemmia breathes.

“I do not know if it is love, but I have never felt it for anyone else. I do not wish your family dead, I do not wish you to suffer. Allow me to do this for you.”

-———————————🌱———————————

“Y/N!”

The sound of her sister’s distressed cry sends the Princess scurrying to Rhaenyra’s rooms.

“Rhaenyra,” Y/N murmurs. She is in a state of undress, suited only for the birthing bed. Bent forward at the waist, gripping the door frame which overlooks the balcony. It is far too soon for her labors. “You must sit.”

“We are past that now.” Rhaenyra tells her. “This is happening.”

Y/N looks to the maester. “Is there nothing we can do?”

“I am afraid not, Princess.”

Rhaenyra reaches for her, “I need you.” Her voice is choked with pain.

Y/N crosses the room. Taking her sister’s hand and fussing about her endlessly. “I’m so sorry, Rhaenyra. I failed you.”

“Often times I felt the world has failed me, but never you, sister. Never have you failed me.” Rhaenyra gasps, clutching her belly.

“Let me help.” Y/N says, moving to knead the small of Rhaenyra’s back.

Rhaenyra shakes her head. “Daemon wishes to move immediately for the throne. He’s gone to madness.”

It’s been all of half an hour since the news arrived by raven. Alicent and Otto plan to use their absence to usurp Rhaenyra, forcing her own niece to take the crown.

“I know Aemmia and I love her like my own. She would not supplant me of her own free will. Whatever game Alicent is playing, I do not wish her to be caught in the cross fire. If Daemon moves it will be a blood bath, you know it as well as I.” Rhaenyra forces the words out between contractions.

“Rhaenyra, what would you have me do?” There’s blood, too much blood.

“You are the one meant to advise me.” Rhaenyra attempts a jest. “I have sent Jacaerys, whatever claim remains to me it is now his. I don’t not want any decision made while I’m abed.”

“I will send Harwin to back him,” Y/N suggests, “be sure Daemon is respectful of your wishes.”

“Harwin is an asset, but he holds little authority in court. Daemon trusts you, he may listen if you speak.”

“I do not wish to leave you this way.” Y/N confesses.

Rhaenyra reaches back, catching her sister’s hand. “It’s as mother always said, this is our battle field. We must learn to face it with a stiff upper lip. I will be alright until you return.”

Y/N nods, perhaps it is silly to worry. Rhaenyra has five children, but this is different. Still the Princess raises her chin, facing the council room with grace.

Harwin looks…perturbed to say the least. Daemon must be eating Jace alive.

“Might I ask exactly what is still up for discussion when your Queen has willed you wait for her? I assume my nephew, Jacaerys, was very clear.”

The room is silent for a long moment.

“Princess,” Lord Corlys, barely recovered from his injury in battle for the Step Stones, nods down to her hands.

Y/N follows his gaze, her mind spiraling with a grief so intense she has not yet felt it. She swallows, composing herself. Wiping her hands down the front of her dress to clean them; staining the material in her sister’s blood. “We are not to make any decisions in the absence of Rhaenyra.”

“We must make preparations, Y/N. War does not stop for a laboring Queen, I’m afraid. You will be most useful at my wife’s side.” Daemon tries to reason. However harsh his words, he does love Rhaenyra and wants her cared for in his absence.

“Daemon!” Rhaenyra cries. The awful sound of it echoing off the walls.

“Clearly you are the one she wants.” Y/N insists. “I will take over as head of this proceeding.”

“You would stand against your own daughter?”

“Wouldn’t it be best to first rally our allies?” Y/N ignores his question. “Assuming we know who still stands with us.”

Daemon looks down at Y/N’s hands again. “What of Aemmia?”

“Whatever my daughter hath done is in the name of this family, and our rightful queen, Rhaenyra Targaryen. Aemmia is strong. She would not be so easily won over by the Hightowers. She would however be smart enough to play their game,” Y/N looks him dead in the eye, “and win.”

Daemon’s jaw ticks, “come Jacaerys, I will teach you the true meaning of loyalty.”

———————————-🌱———————————-

“Let the seven bear witness! It was King Viserys’ dying wish, that his first born child, Y/N Targaryen’s daughter, Aemmia Targaryen-”

Aemond feels his wife’s fingers tighten around his, as if the name startled her. Aemmia Strong is no more, he squeezes back. You’re alright.

“And his true born son, Aemond Targaryen, should succeed him. It is your great fortune and honor to witness this today. A new King and Queen to guide our city.”

Aemmia is grateful when she is asked to kneel to the High Septon, for fear she may faint. Her knees hit the top stair harder than strictly necessary. She can’t go through with this.

‘But, there is new hope. With Aemmia and Aemond’s union, our houses might stand together once more.’

Her grandsire’s words ring in her ears. This will not unite them. It will break any bonds that hold them. I cannot do it.

“May the warrior give them courage.”

I miss you, grandsire.

“May the smith lend strength to their sword and shield.”

I’m sorry, Rhaenyra.

“May the father defend them in their need.”

I need you, father.

“May the crone lift her shining lamp and guide their way to wisdom.”

Forgive me, mother.

With that the High Septon is finished.

“Crown of Viserys, the peaceful. Passed down to the next generation.”

Aemmia’s head is light, the metal of her grandsire’s crown too cool against her skin. Even it knows, it does not belong.

‘Tonight I want you to see me as I am.’

If only he were here. Her grandsire did not wish this. He would never let it happen.

“The crown of the conqueror, passed down through generations.” Criston Cole crowns Aemond next. A clear sense of accomplishment about him.

As if this has not been cruel enough, they are now expected to stand. Aemmia hopes no one will notice the wobble in her stance. Turning out to face the masses.

Aemond presses a kiss to her temple. Tis done. Drawing his sword, he kneels, presenting the blade for her to wield. He looks up at her, “my Queen.”

Aemmia takes the hilt carefully. Lifting it from his outstretched hand to the sky.

“All hail, her grace.” The Septon announces, though confused by the lack of ceremony. “Aemmia Targaryen, first of her name. Queen of the Andals, the Rhoynar, and the First Men. Lady of the seven kingdoms, and protector of the realm. Aemmia the Queen!”

The applause starts slow, but is ever building. Aemond stands beside her proudly now, she has done her part. Her hand gone limp in his, eyes glossed over, she has checked out. Though no one but he is the wiser.

Only the explosion from the entrance and rubble flying in all directions pulls her from it. There is a dragon, she can make out the shape of someone on it’s saddle, but she cannot say who.

As the dust settles, Aemmia spots Rhaenys; Rhaenys sees her. Their eyes locked as Meleys rears back. Aemmia’s fingers curl around Aemond’s outstretched forearm. Though his body would do little to shield her, it is the only protection he has to offer.

The roar that sounds will live forever in her mind, no fire joins it. This is not and execution, it’s a warning.

———————————-🌱———————————-

“Ahhh!” Rhaenyra’s head falls forward in defeat.

“Good,” Y/N says, “very good. You’re nearly there.”

“Princess,” one of Rhaenyra’s maids calls, “you should not do this alone. Let us help you.”

Rhaenyra says nothing, bearing down against the pressure in her abdomen.

“Once more,” Y/N encourages, prepared to catch the babe.

Syrax cries out in distress as Rhaenyra brings her sixth child into the world.

The infant, a girl, perfect and beautiful. Completely still. She is small, but appears healthy though she does not cry. Y/N turns the baby over, rubbing at her back. “Come on, little one.”

Rhaenyra looks to her sister.

“We must have the maester!”

“Yes, Princess.”

“Y/N,” Rhaenyra shakes her head. “Give her here.”

“She will be alright.”

Rhaenyra leans her forehead to her sister’s. “Thank you for staying with me.”

Y/N slides the baby into Rhaenyra’s arms.

“I should like to be alone now.”

“I cannot leave you.” Not like this, she shouldn’t be alone.

“Even you cannot shield me from this. I have lost a child, I must grieve.”

It isn’t fair. Y/N forces herself to her feet. Covered in blood and the aftermath of a newborn babe. Holding her composure out the door, down the hall. But the tears come, hot and unbidden. Scorching her cheeks.

She tears at the strings of her gown as she walks, letting it pool at her feet then stepping over it. Shedding it the way a snake might shed it’s skin. She is different now, forever changed.

“My darling.” Harwin greets her just beyond the door of their guest chambers.

“I-” Y/N puts a hand up between them. “I cannot be comforted.”

Harwin holds his stance, not moving toward her. “You must have a bath.”

Y/N shakes her head. “There is a war to be fought.”

“In your dressing gown?”

“I do not have armor.”

“We will get you some, when the time comes.”

“Do not coddle me.”

“I apologize, that was not my intent. I only want to be sure you’ve thought this out.”

“Thought it out?” Y/N forms her mouth slowly around each word. “The Hightowers have held our daughter against her will and forced her to commit high treason. The repercussions of which sent Rhaenyra into such a state of distress that she has lost her child.”

“Viserys would have wanted-”

“My father is not here! He’s gone. Dead.” The word burns it’s way from her throat. “He left me and he’s never coming back.”

“Y/N,” Harwin runs a hand over his face.

“If my father were alive, he would open the floodgates and rain hellfire upon them.”

“Look at me.” Harwin crosses the room, taking her face in hand.

“She’s all I have left of my mother.” Y/N shoves him away. “All I have left of him. I cannot lose Rhaenyra. I will protect her at any cost and no one will take her from me!”

“My love, you are not yourself.”

“No, you’re wrong.” Y/N insists. “This is who I am, Harwin. This is who I’ve always been.”

“I have known you some thirty eight years, married to you for over twenty of them. I know who you are, Y/N Targaryen. I know you and I love you. Therefore I will be the first to tell you when you are making a mistake.”

“That is the problem, Harwin.” Her chest heaves with the weight of it. “I’ve changed, I am different.”

“Push me away and reel me in as you wish, but I will not abandon you. When you die it will be with my slain body at your feet, my sword and shield in your hand. If this is the war we are fighting I will stand at your side. I am not your enemy. I’m only asking to weigh our options.”

Her defenses dissipate. “Your patience and understanding touches me deeply. I do apologize for taking my frustrations out on you, it will not happen again.”

Harwin softens at this, “you need not apologize for being human.”

“I do not see a way back from this.” Y/N admits. “They have gone too far.” She puts a hand to her aching heart.

———————————-🌱———————————-

It has been three days. Three days since the coronation. Aemmia has just changed into her nightgown when she hears rustling from the adjoining room of her apartment.

Aemond.

“Come to celebrate?” Aemmia shakes her head. “I am exhausted from the day’s affairs. I wish to sleep.”

Silence.

“Aemond?” Aemmia turns to farther investigate. There is someone there, a man. His hood draw up, covering the top portion of his face. “Show yourself.”

The cloak is pulled back, Aemmia squints into the dimly lit corner. He reminds her of someone…someone she used to know. But it couldn’t possibly be, “Laenor?” Now she is seeing ghosts.

The man takes a step toward her. “Ser Lynis will do.”

“It was you? All these years, the one my mother was writing from the Step Stones.”

He nods.

“Does she know you’re here?”

“Your mother wanted to come herself, badly.” Laenor explains, “but I had a better chance of getting through the passage ways into the castle than she did.”

“Are you…staying?” Say yes. “Or perhaps I could come with you?” Please.

“Not just yet. But we do not want you to think yourself forgotten. Your family will not abandon you here, Aemmia.”

“In all these years I have not forgotten you. It is so good to see you again, Uncle.”

Laenor opens his arms to her, “come.”

Aemmia runs, all but jumping into the familiar hold of the man who would put her up on his shoulders as a child. “Will you tell her- tell my mother I did not want this.”

“She knows.” Laenor assures her.

“And the crown,” Aemmia makes a run for it, “my grandsire would want Rhaenyra to have it. Our true Queen.”

Laenor wraps his hand around it, tucking it safely into his satchel. “Well done, sweetheart. You’ve made us all proud.”

“Will I see you again?” Aemmia asks.

“When the time is right.”

Part VIII

Taglist @evyiione @giulia2372 @bubblebuttwade @hotd-fanfic @leoramage @hyperfiaxed-freak @chonisbestmistake @poemfreak306

[hearts4robs]

Hello~!

I've never done a match up event before! But knew I had to try once I saw it was open cause your writing is absolutely precious!

For Fandom, I guess DC! Love Batfam family chaos! Makes me want to curl up with a blanket and watch them bicker and roughhouse until Alfred comes in with a feather duster, looking equal parts disappointed and amused.

I'm a 5'3 18 year old asexual panromatic. (Yes, im just a baby, though i have been told-more like my therapist often told me that i dont act my age, saying i act like Im 30. Still trying to figure out if I should be offended by that.) With long hair that's completely grown out red box dye like little mermaid red, my roots being somehow not quite brown not quite ginger and just not blonde enough to be strawberry blonde. My appearance is fairly round and cute even if my expression is often RB. My eyes are a green that appears to be more of a dark grey.

To sum up my personality in one word would be cat like. Sometimes I'm docile and actually a bit of a doormat. In new environments, I tend to shadow some I know and can't find myself able to stand up for myself. This is probably ties into my selective mutism and social anxiety. Sometimes, when I'm in a familiar environment, I tend to be more aggressive for better or for worse. I love a good argument and debate, standing firm in my decision even if I'm wrong. That stubbornness has gotten me in trouble quite a few times. Though cause of it, I've thought of becoming a lawyer. When I'm not arguing I'm drawing, or painting on my walls which I've done far too many times now.

I'm very much a homebody who rather stay in pjs but perfect date wise would probably be a bit of a classic nerd/bookworm date of going to a cute book store and getting lost in the deep wooden bookshelves flicking through various of books catching my eye. Maybe debating on what book is better or whatever trope is more interesting in a detective novel. (I love murder mystery, horror, thrillers, romances of all types, and absolutely despise shakespeare. I was told Romeo and Juliet was a tragic romance. Liars they all are all I can see is the making of a really creepy stalker movie. I can't watch horror movies funny little contradiction, right?) Personally I'd probably write something after the date. I always get inspired by going out and always find myself hunched over my laptop writing whatever inspired me have it be the moment or a movie. I don't know how many times I've watched a movie and got inspired just to spend hours writing whatever fanfic about it. Which can be either amazing or terrible cause I'm an okay writer with a preference for angst due to my dark humor.

I never realized how hard it was to pick an ideal type until just now lol. I guess my type is someone who would enjoy talking/debating/discussing with me, someone fun who loves to do new activities as ive never really do much and is willing to listen to me ramble about whatever hyperfixation. Bucket list kind of things or be able to stay in and talk about their day while I cook some food. (One of my love languages is food. I want to be full and content.) I'm a homebody who has more of a traditional mindset due to my upbringing. So staying home and activities at home would probably be more common. Oh! A bit more open minded or at leasr able to deal with my curiosity, I love discussing religions and culture practices (im unfortunately like the whitest of whites. My dad's side is a bit of a classic white racist). I'm a pagan with some more Wiccan practices, yes crystals and candles. We put holly near our front door and hang cinnamon brooms throughout the house to bring good fortune.

Trope is also a hard pick. I like a good enemies to lovers or a revenge story but romance wise probably a childhood friends (or friends to lovers) idea. Just the idea of your partner being someone who was your friend since you were a tot and chasing butterflies, picking dandelions to blow them into the wind. Someone who has looked at you like your the center of their world while you pull them through the park. Even though they have no idea what lo6ge is truly is. Just kind of melts my heart, and will probably give me cavities from the fluff.

Ahh hopefully I did this right! Sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes. Hope you have a blessed day, and something amazing happens to you soon <3

𝐓𝐢𝐦 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐞: 𝐓𝐚𝐤𝐞-𝐨𝐮𝐭

“I’m back!” Tim exclaims out into the open hallway as he pushes the door closed with his foot. There were multiple white, thin plastic bags in Tim’s hands, his keys dangling from one of his fingers.

You raise your head from the book in your lap, leaning forward to catch a glimpse of your boyfriend as he shimmied his way out of his shoes.

“Hi, honey.” You smile at him as he walks to the coffee table in front of you, setting down the bags of different take-out.

“Alright.” Tim sighs with a grin, his chest heaving a bit quicker, like he was a bit out of breath.

“What’s all this?” You ask, reaching over and pulling some of the thin plastic away from the food. “Smells amazing, no doubt but-“

“Well, you said you wanted to taste the world.” Tim says, a giddy smile on his lips as he plops down onto the couch beside you with a sigh. “So I brought it to you.”

You smile at him before snorting out a chuckle.

“Fuck you.” You say, and Tim simply smiles before grabbing a small box of thai food, handing it to you, giving you a chance to get the first bite.

“You’re welcome.” He says, nuzzling a small kiss to the softness of your cheek.

Headcanons:

Tim and you have annual movie nights. Every Friday night. Very simple, very easy. You have a joint letterbox account where you leave brutally honest reviews and you both analyse that shit like your life depends on it.

When you guys moved into your shared apartment, Tim dedicated one of the walls of your living room for you to paint and draw on. Needed more space? He’ll paint it over with whatever background colour you need.

You guys have a small chalk board on your fridge. It was used as a small shopping list at first, like writing up stuff like ‘ran outta eggs and cucumber’, but it quickly ended up in Tim leaving you cute notes and reminders for when he was gone on patrol.

Tim doesn’t always understand your asexuality, and he struggled to figure out how to relieve himself, but he figured out a solution and tries to turn the topic whenever someone discusses it to the point it makes you uncomfortable.

I hope you like this </3 it’s a bit late and honestly a little rushed but I’m trying😭🙏this also ISN’T proof-read so I’m so, so sorry if there’s mistakes☝️☹️

[fizzbot]

I literally just sent you one but what if. You did more. For me? :3333

9, 10, 11, 12, 18, 20, 21, 22, 24 VIOLENCE (please do not look at how I spelled it in the last one) ask game <333

3, 4, 13, 17 (This time with Octavia), 18 (Striker), 22 (Husk), 24 (This time with Fizz), 25 (This time with Charlie) for the other fandom ask game :333

JKLDHFJKLSDFHJKL NO ITS OK I LOVE GIVING YOU MY THINKIES!!!!!!!!!! :DDDDD lets do this!!!!!!!! >:333333

violence ask game og post here!

9. worst part of canon for hh, its the valangel plotline. god its so bad. you cant have a silly joke character also be a horrific abuser, you have to pick one. also dont hire rape fetish artists to handle a very real?? issue?? hello??? for hb,,,,,i gotta pick the same vein and give it to stolitz. I KNOW I KNOW i bitched a lot about them in the last answer post but JKLSDFJKLHJKf IT MAKES ME SO MAD. especially bc (much like hazbin) the original plot of the story is SO FUCKING GOOD. a group of low-ranking hell creatures run an illegal business where the access the human realm??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME. THATS SO GOOD. i love that its a direct parallel to hazbin's "solving the overpopulation" main plot JKLSHDFJKLDS ITS SO FUNNY AND SO PERFECT AND WE WERE ROBBED IN BOTH SHOWS FOR VIVZIES STUPID FUCKING FETISH BAIT

10. worst part of fanon the vivzie dickriders are so goddamn annoying. ive noticed that this is kind of a trend in any media that has a large "critic" audience. like it also totally happened with miraculous ladybug. but for some reason when a bunch of people hate on the show bc it sucks, mostly bc the creator also sucks, it spawns a parallel group of people who will defend anything and everything about it. like there are people who devote entire blogs and accounts to ""disproving"" vivzie allegations (which no one has ever done successsfully btw bc she did all of the shit shes being accused of). and theres people who will defend every shitty plotpoint and piece of bad writing and leave no room for nuance. like, yes, im critical of the shows, but i can admit theres good in them. obviously i enjoy them enough to have a sideblog for them. but like. these people dont understand that its GOOD to critisize media, ESPECIALLY media that you like. its important to acknowledge when certain trends can be seen in the work, because otherwise youre going to be more susceptible to being negatively influenced. like, vivzie has history of antiblackness/racism/antisemitism. is it a coincidence that these people are horribly misrepresented in the show?

11. number of fandom-related words you've filtered only 2 related to the hellaverse actually!! but ive had to put a whole bunch of different variants/spellings. i have radioapple and adamsapple blocked just cause theyre the most prevalent ships that i dont like.

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them MIMZY. i fucking love her SO MUCH!!!!!! :DDDDDDDD part of why i despise radioapple and its shippers so much is bc so much of the fandom hates her for ""interrupting their moment"". SHUT THE FUCK UP shes the best part of their song and also the best girl and shes so pretty and cute and youre all WRONG for hating her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! light of my life <333333333 spinoff show about just mimzy immediately

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on... rosie x mimzy :(((((((( they dont even have a proper, fully agreed upon shipname. i thought you all loved old women yuri :/// also POLYVEES????? i am SOOOOO sick of the ""vel and her gay dads"" shit. it is so goddamn annoying. VOX CALLS HER "MY DEAR". VAL CALLS HER "BABYDOLL." theyre all fucking.

20. part of canon you found tedious or boring honestly? all of hazbin. the heaven arc was just SO rushed and still felt like the same thing was happening every episode. helluva never/hasnt become tedious to me just bc its so much more episodic i think

21. part of canon you think is overhyped the fuckin. shipping. stolitz in helluva is SOOOOOO hyped and for NOTHING and the whole war was hyped in hazbin and yet was also so incredibly nothing. OH AND PENTIOUS' REDEMPTION??? everyones acting like its the most interesting plot twist ever as if it doesnt suck objectively

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores loona and via ://// the only time i see them talked about is when people are shipping them which is gross. i really really really want to see more of them and have them be developed more and given personalities outside their shitty fathers.

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse VALANGEL. OH MY GODDDDDDDDD i fucking HATE hearing ""hot takes"" about that arc. THEYRE NEVER HOT TAKES. EVER. theyre just excusing vals actions or excusing VIVS actions in making it. I HATE IT SO MUCH

fandom ask game og post here!

3. NoTP? OOH. i have a bunch. ummm. literally any striker ship that isnt blitzker. striker x chaz, striker x moxxie, striker x millie, striker x sallie, striker x stella, etc etc i could literally list them all day. i hate all of them. every single one cannot work without mischaracterizing him to hell. he works with blitz because theyre equals and they LIKE EACH OTHER. OH DUH radioapple!!!! literally biggest NOTP ever i fucking hate them. i hate adamsapple, and cherrisnake, anddddd.......there are obviously more but im blanking. some i dislike for more innocent reasons. like any ship with tex and/or any ship with sallie? i hate all of them just because those characters are so. Nothing. they have 0 substance apart from being sexualized

4. Is there a popular pairing you don't necessarily dislike but aren't too invested in? OH well i guess i kinda answered this above hsdjkf. i guess my hottest take is fallenstar (chaggie) and m&m. i simply do not give a shit about them. i care a LITTLE more for vega n charlie, but like. pretty much JUST because theyre sapphic. what does m&m have going for them, they are literally textbook boring married couple. who give a shit

13. What's a character or ship you haven't written/drawn yet but would like to some day? sjkdfhjksdf ive doodled them beforrreeeee but ive gotta draw more verbie <////3 im thinkin about making a finished piece for them they are CUTE.......otherwise i think ive drawn/written about like everyone i care for sjkdfhjsdkf

17. What's a book, movie, or show you think [Octavia] would like? AWW this is cute....ummmm!!!!! a piece of lore i just made up for her is that i think shes rlly interested in human culture. like she likes movies from earth, and literature from up there, so on and so forth <3333 shes really into horror movies but specifically the old and bad ones <3333 she will rattle off 100000 facts to you about how they made that fake blood for that scene or "did you know they used a REAL chainsaw?". i think she has an affinity for the macabre BUT i also think she has a bit of a soft spot. she was kind of robbed of a proper childhood a little bit (as were most goetians) so shes a sucker for sappy soft stuff too. she casually watches mlp or care bears and plays lots of minecraft and terraria <3

18. Type [Striker's]'s name and tell us what the autocomplete suggests as the next word shjkdfhjksdfhjkfsd ok so i wasnt sure whether this meant using google autocomplete or phone autocomplete. i tried google first and my only result was 'striker helluva boss' cause thats what i google for art ref. but then i tried it on my phone and. uh........................................................................this is so embarassing. i pulled out my phone and pressed the middle autocomplete button a few times and it landed on 'striker tying up blitzos arms'...........LISTEN. IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS WRITING DOWN THIS ART IDEA AND IT REMEMBERED. WHY DID IT REMEMBER

22. Give us a headcanon for [Husk] UMMMM!!!!!!! it is so muc harder to come up with these for characters i dont relate to as much..........i am so sorry but i have literally thought for so long and cant come up with anything that you havent already said <////////////////////333

24. What's your favourite thing about [Fizz]? i remember really not thinking anything of it at the time but i LOVE the transition of how he is in public/at ozzies to how he is at home!!!! its really interesting to see him soften up and i think theres a lot to be said about the persona he puts on in public that i just KNOW the show isnt gonna explore. i dont think hes the. best anxiety rep, but i do think there are moments where its compelling. OH and i LOVE watching his energy bounce off blitz, its super fun :3

25. What's your least favourite thing [Charlie] said or did? grgghgg ohh girl,,,,,you had so much wasted potential ://// this is a lot more nitpicky than my answer for stolas but its easily that one moment in ep 4. where she WHINES and CRIES like a BABY over angel and vega carries her away. the infantilization is SOOOO irritating, esp bc literally in the NEXT EPISODES they try to portray her as a strong and confident good leader???? its so pathetic and SO frustrating especially when she could easily make it up to angel by KILLING HIS RAPIST.

WAHHHJSKDFHJKLD THANKS FOR ASKINGGGGG i love getting out all my thinkies :33333

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 2/21/2023

despite two sections clocking in at one sentence each, i had a lot of thoughts about a video game so this one is the normal creeping-up-on-2k-words length

listening

brian david gilbert's rgss must be presented without comment.

-

reading

earlier last year a regional gas station chain offered a whopping twenty five cents off per gallon. many terms and conditions applied. the one that made me scoff and delete the app right there at the pump was that location data had to be on at all times. not just when you were using the app or in a geofenced area around the gas stations, all the time. i hate people knowing where i am. i despise my data being sold. do not advertise to me. fuck off.

last year this made me briefly wonder about the loyalty programs i have with the regional supermarket chains, big y and stop & shop. i don't even want to think about whatever instacart was collecting on me much earlier in the pandemic. unfortunately i can choose not to drive as much but i really should not eat less and i do love a loss leader sale. and then i had to move again and forgot about it. earlier this week my favorite data scientists at The Markup dropped a...upsetting article on kroger's data practices, which can include in-store tracking, biometrics, facial recognition, and when shopping on kroger.com: "Third-party trackers send your product page views, search terms, and items that you have added to your shopping cart to Meta, Google, Bing, Pinterest, and Snapchat." did you know they have their own spinoff data company? for why, you might ask?

Experts told The Markup that companies that sell products in grocery stores don’t have much visibility into what happens after their items are placed on shelves. These brands want granular shopping data that only supermarkets have in order to gauge the success of the brands’ products. In recent years, this data has become harder to come by and therefore more valuable. 

i try very hard not to be be doom and gloom about tech bc reporting already tends toward the hysteric, and usually there is stuff i can do or a different option i can take to avoid a package of my data being sold and linked to other packages of my data. however, it is unrealistic to leave my phone at home and pay with cash, and financially i can't afford to opt out of these loyalty programs. sucks! sucks real bad! The Markup articles are pretty good at making the american senate take notice, but they are very slow and do not always fully understand tech abuses, bc their average age is sixty fuckin three.

-

watching

im ticking along in adventure time, in the middle of season six, the last real long season before we get down to twenty and fourteen episode seasons. there has been an amusing string of episodes where finn and jake aren't present or are only present briefly. this show will wander off to tell the most heartrending story about a character you will never see again, and this episode will stick with you for ten years.

ive also been looking at the fandom (i know) wiki page for each episode, bc why not, and it is a very funny fan wiki. a great deal of emphasis on animation errors with the caveats that maybe the miscolored arm of a princess in episode whatever actually means there's two princesses of that kingdom and we're only seeing the second one for the first time now. whenever the show references a classic work, the note in the wiki has the tone of "ugh this weird old thing why is my show making a joke about it". if an episode won an emmy (this show won fifteen emmys btw) it is usually the very last thing on the page bc that's not lore or errors or connections to other episodes why should you care??? either a very specific type of guy or a bunch of young teens wrote this. probably a bunch of young teens that grew up to be a very specific type of guy.

-

playing

thank u for all ur open world rpg recs, i think horizon zero dawn is the closest thing to what i want but i will probably end up playing Prey first (which has exactly one of the many qualities i want and is not open world even a little bit) bc it is a game i actually own. but im here to say i know im having a depressive episode when im listening to a lot of mother mother and playing f/allout 4. anyway we're back at it again in far harbor, which at least contains the most interesting storytelling in the game. can we all say hello to andre, bethesda's eleventh first gay character?

coming up on this drive-in theater with an incongruous neon heart looming out of the mist and spooky music plus screams from the horror movie trailer that's been playing on loop since the bombs dropped is SO fun. nothing on the mainland is quite this atmospheric. the fog really does heighten the fun of exploration. i know dead money did it first and better but this is less dire than dead money. usually.

also i forgot they're showing a western staring Legally Not Lee van Cleef if u switch the reels. this is not even getting into the delightful enemy encounter at this location bc i have a different location i want to talk about

GOD the MS Azalea (the one screenshot that isn't mine and is from the wiki) is so fun to run around. a rusted out, ripped in half cargo ship with five different sections (guardpost, top of ship, shipping container apartments on top of ship, inner sheltered harbor within ship and floating kitchen/pool table parlor, floating bar and clinic lashed to ship entered by swimming or elevator down from the top of the ship, sheltered harbor between two halves of the broken ship. each of these sections uses vertical space in interesting ways bc the ship is so fucking big. there is a straight up House underneath that boat. and everything feels very lived in, there's clutter and signs of life everywhere. these guys are just vibing with their little stores and their little apartments. a smarter game or a game with more time would have leaned into "you were sent to kill these guys by the townsfolk bc they felt threatened by an unaffiliated settlement" but alas. the trappers on the boat are just xp.

it is very funny that the lighthouse on the south end of the island refuses to load in properly, no matter where i am

this dlc, more than anything else in the game, actually does feel like my choices matter. i do the missions for the mariner and the barricade physically changes. i do enough fairly complex quest chains for enough of the town and they decide they like me enough to go build settlements. seeing the settlement fog condensers off in the distance from across the island feels very different from the mainland, where generally your settlement's buildings don't pop in until you're pretty fucking close.

i really don't care about how big the map is, i want the main game to be this dense and this bold in telling a stories, start to finish, that feel very interconnected and grounded to its location. i am feeling a little conflicted with my playtime, bc i gotta lotta fucking bones to pick with this game, but i am having fun with this dlc. part of it is "what if fallout/the rest of the game was good" and part of it is the depression making any scrap of delight feel weird. so it goes. february will end eventually.

-

making

did my taxes.

[backseat-negan]

Well, damn… it’s been four years since I posted. I had almost forgotten my love of Jeffrey Dean Morgan/TWD and the amazing community of writers and friends I found here.

Because when addiction takes over, it becomes the only thing your mind will make space for.

Trigger warnings: addiction, drugs, IV drug use, drug abuse, cocaine, overdose, syringes, needles, tracks, track marks

4 years ago - right after my last post - I was diagnosed with a neuromuscular disease called Myasthenia Gravis, or MG. Similar in ways to Multiple Sclerosis and Muscular Dystrophy, MG damages the receptors that allow your muscles to get signals from your nerves. Over time it causes severe muscle weakness and fatigue, and sometimes loss of muscle function entirely.

For me, that meant losing much of the fine motor function in my hands and arms, as well as chronic double vision from the muscles around my eyes being affected. Consequently, I lost my career working as a surgical assistant and I lost my ability to play guitar, which I had been doing for almost 15 years.

MG progresses differently for every person, and mine went from “Start” to “I’m going to take everything you love” in less than five months. For most people, this progression takes years - but mine unexpectedly progressed quite quickly, and that became the catalyst for a very, very dark downward spiral that I still haven’t been able to wrench myself out of almost four years later.

I had dabbled in illicit drugs here and there in the months leading up to my diagnosis, but the day I discovered I could no longer play guitar, I made the worst decision of my life: I picked up a needle for the first time, assuming it would also be my last. I just wanted to escape the sadness for a bit, and I was curious about the effects. But as soon as I pushed that first dose, I knew I was fucked. I immediately wanted more.

It went from 1 or 2 doses a day to 5 or 10, to 20 or 30, until at its peak I was dosing over 100 times a day. Yes, the math is correct - I was injecting every 10-15 minutes, all day, not sleeping for days at a time, not eating for weeks at a time, and not showering for months at a time - simply because I couldn’t stand the sight of the track marks covering my entire body.

In a year and a half, I went from 290 pounds to 170 pounds, simply from not eating. On the rare occasion I would leave the house and see my friends, they would immediately ask, “Dude, when’s the last time you ate anything?” Most of the time it had been so long, I couldn’t give them an honest answer. My mind and body had ceased to even register the sensation of hunger - the only thing it wanted was more C.

I had a few stints in rehab and might string together a few weeks of sobriety, but I always went back to it. I managed to avoid overdose until this year… February 4th, 2024. It put me into repeated seizures and respiratory arrest, they were able to revive me and I was in an induced coma for 4 days.

I wish I could say it was a wake up call, but I went back to it within hours of being discharged from the hospital. I despise withdrawals, and they just keep getting worse the longer I’m on the shit. Then just over a month later - March 20th - I OD’d again. Once again threw me into seizures and I almost stopped breathing, but thankfully this time the paramedics arrived significantly faster and I didn’t die - again.

I can’t remember the last time I showered, because just the thought of having to look down and see all the scabbed, bruised, and heavily scarred track marks on my arms and hands is sickening. I’ve been wearing long sleeves for almost two years straight - even on 90° summer days - and I put makeup/concealer on the back of my hands every day where the scars are the darkest so I don’t get disapproving looks from family, cashiers, and waitresses. I’ve gotten better at eating, and have managed to get back up to 205 pounds. But that’s the only thing that’s gotten better.

No one wakes up and decides to become an addict. It begins with one small seemingly meaningless choice to escape what’s in our head for just a few minutes or hours, but very quickly becomes an all-consuming downward spiral into our own grave. I wish I could go back and show 29 year old me what I’ve become, and take the needle out of her hand. But I can’t take any of this back, and right now, I still haven’t found a way out.

Sorry for the long post, just needed to vent a bit.

[creativebrainrot]

Since RP is becoming less and less scary ive been considering Maelgwyn AUs that dont include major story characters and one that also doesnt include being an Elonian Sylvari.

I'll start with the second one because, I've thought about it less, since the game encourages non-pale tree sylvari through Malyck's existence.

I'll keep the abnormally large part of his design because it contributes to his own expierence with himself. (?) His stature, coloration, and generally creature-like traits contribute to his selfhate and how much he despises being seen as a monster. Which is his primary motivation for why he Does That One Thing that starts his journey. Being seen as a monster is why he becomes a bounty hunter. So if he's not in elona, what if bandit syndicate leader? Except, these ones are grey morals and tend to help out those in need by picking targets who have excess and will for sure be fine after the attack. People who can EASILY replace lost shipments. Thats an easy enough replacement for the desert beast thing.

undercooked tho because im pretty sure no one would be tooo mad about a Single Elonian sylvari. My main answer for Maelgwyn's desert tree not being involved is usually, the tree never recovers. He's the only one that's awakened, and rather than healing slowly and stabilizing, the tree dies a few weeks after he wakes.

The first AU is much more interesting to me because Maelgwyn starts pretty grey morals BUT. If he never meets Trahearne,,,,,,,, he gets worse. Because Trahearne is also a grey morals guy but after being pact marshal for so long his morals have shifted to be a lighter shade, which rubs off on Maelgwyn. But if he never meets and stays with Trahearne then his friends would likely be fellow bounty hunters and contacts in the trade syndicates that get along with The Desert Beast and i think thatd make him much more willing to do shit like say. Raid a syndicate hideout with his buddies for nicer drinks and such. The syndicate doesnt LIKE him ANYWAY, and they ARE too close to his turf SO is it rEEEAAALLY THAAT BAAAD. cmon man. its JUST for some better alcohol and theyre only gonna do it once. or twice. when they feel like it. its not like the bandits need the stuff anyway????????

and shit like that. If he never meets Trahearne he also doesnt heal. Not as much anyway. Because falling for your fucking client/charge was a FLUKE and NOT THE PLAN. Maelgwyn was still very much not ready to actually love someone again but thats what he THOUGHT he was. He stumbled across the right person, and fell in love with someone safe and understanding enough, who loved him BACK enough, to see through his difficult tendencies. So his self hate, self doubt, fear, and just. ALL of his mental health issues around falling in love and being vulnerable with other people sticks around. Because he never got a chance to organically unlearn any of it. Because he IS NOT gonna be the one who goes looking for love.

Absolutely not, you tell this man you love him four months into a casual romantic relationship, he is having a secret panic attack and ghosting.

If he falls in love with YOU and realizes it. Bye. Ghosting.

He's so not okay xd

He's okay with friends, for the most part, but chances are, you're still not getting through to his honest self. Everyone gets The Desert Beast. If you get to see Maelgwyn you are a LUCKY bastard, this man masks and hides his real self SO MUCH.

[furballfaggot]

my buddy convinced me to make an animal jam play wild account since it actually still gets proper updates and so far my feelings have been. mixed. overall i havent done nearly as much as anyone else bc my account has existed for maybeee 2 or 3 hours? so this is just my first impressions. im also kinda biased bc ive been playing animal jam classic for years and years and YEARS. back when 9 + 10 = 21 was still unironically funny and every cool kid in class read warriors. might update this post with extra thoughts as i go along! all opinions below the cut bc this is an absurdly long post

ive only played a few levels of overflow (and it might be because i played on expert because i Definitely have no overbearing hubris casting a shadow upon my better judgement) but the gem payout being higher than AJC for each level you complete is a very welcome change (2 gems times X number, seemingly determined by how long your path is, vs AJPWs i think it was like 5 gems times X number determined by how long your path is? either that or like 10. idk i blew a whole half hour on overflow alone and it was almost 6 AM by the time i finished so my brains kinda muddled)

also, membership has become far less of an overbearing nightmare monster for AJPW in comparison to AJC! thats a good thing! personally i think that membership just Shouldn't but thats because i think any monetarily-accessed subscription anythings just Shouldn't especially in this day and age. i got to go to the clothing store and buy things i liked and i didnt just have to longingly stare at the paywalled options like a maiden gazing out to sea and it felt great

dont like how theres so many fewer options for shopping for Like Everything but its a far more ambitious game than AJC what with everything being 3d modeled, and its got a younger target demo and theyre usually happy with whatever looks cool, so it checks out. haha. funny pun that was intended definitely. whats there is also pretty great and the den item options you get started off with are both way more cool and way more More than classic in its hayday. idk about the ajc starting den items now though i dug my old account from the ashes of who i once was when i decided to pick classic up again. i dont actually remember if you start with any den items in ajc now that i think about it i might be misremembering. that still means play wild has that point against classic though. shame theres no water animals but they could maybe possibly be added in an update pretty please wildworks if by some miracle youre reading this i am begging and pleadi

really my main issue so far is with how many things cost real-world money. theres next to nothing that requires a membership to even be bought aside from one members-only map location my buddy warned me about beforehand -- which, as a reluctant f2p since literally like 5th grade, ive been playing this game for Far too long, i do genuinely appreciate -- but boy oh boy you can sure tell this was mainly developed as a mobile game. there is so much pay-real-money-for-trinkets stuff and you just Cannot disable that menu. at least let me get rid of the little button that tells me i can spend the hard-earned bucks on moms credit card to get 1/4th the amount of animals of AJC man thats all i ask of this part

also this is largely unrelated but can i just say i DESPISE how many things are like "hi heres a welcome bonus :) oh but you need to pay like 3 bucks for it. yeah its usually 5 but for a Special New Player Like You? its a steal!" like thats not a welcome bonus thats an entry fee. i know thats like a paltry amount of money compared to most things Just Ever but its also coming from a guy whos family usually has zero money to spare

[emeritus-fuckers]

For the ministry role event rerun!

1. I would say I'm likely to be a ghoul because I'm in a way a pack person? I tend to want to form strong bonds with a small amount of people and being in a small pack seems like my kind of thing.

2. I feel like I'm drawn to more Terzo or Copia. I'm not honestly sure why but they seem more a little laid back and my kind of people to work with. I feel maybe more Copia though because I don't think I could handle myself with trying to work with Terzo and any compliments and flirting.

3. I'm a big ol' introvert haha. I hate speaking in front of a large amount of people. I'm more somebody who wants to have a set few close friends to hang out with. When speaking with somebody I honestly try to avoid eye contact because it just doesn't feel right to me.

4. Dishes. I despise doing dishes and refuse to do them. Laundry is something I more like to do. Laundry is simple and I like to sort through everything a certain way.

5. It really depends honestly. There's a lot of places I'd love to travel but I also want to stay in a cozy space at home. I've always told myself that I just want to get an RV and travel the world. It just simply makes the most sense to me.

6. I'm somehow am Animal magnet and don't understand how, but I love most animals. I'm iffy on Reptiles but I adore rats. I lean being more a dog person honestly. There are some days where I just don't want to do anything and have lazy days and I like people who allow themselves to have lazy days.

This post is part of the 1000 followers Role in ministry event. Entries for the event are now closed.

Your role in the ministry is...Wardrobe Manger at the Ministry under Papa Emeritus IV

At the ministry it's mainly looking after Copia's robes and the Papal regailia, other Papas robes and the Cardinals robes. After a tour however you have to sort through all of the Ghoul's stuff.

You wash the costumes but also see to their upkeep and just generally keeping everything organised.

You also get to spend time with Copia's rats. He's happy for you to hang out with them whenever you like and the rats adore you.

Normally get your work done then go and see the rats. You also hang out with Copia during this time.

He's a really good boss, as long as the work gets done he is very laid back, you keep your own hours and get breaks whenever you like. You, him and the Ghouls are a tight knit group. You've become very close with them and the Ghouls treat you as one of the pack.

Some of the Ghouls like to keep you company while you work. But only if you want them too, they know how introverted you are, so they are very careful not to overwhelm you.

Copia offers for you to join them on tour to help with wardrobe, it's totally up to you. He knows you want to travel but he also knows you like being at home. He says you would get your own bunk on a tour bus which would be your private space.

~

Written by Nyx

[escapisminmywords]

all before i leave this forsaken town,

i’ll leave my footprint behind for you to see and reminisce. take it as compensation for all the things that we never got to do with one another, for all the words left unsaid that caused me more pain not saying that would have otherwise. for every moment of ours that was cut short and despised.

i’ll leave you with memories to never forget my sun blessed face, my dandelion attitude and my ever shining light — blessings line my lips, blessings line my footprints, and my eyes give you strength, so i apologize for all the times that i could never look you in the eyes myself.

and at the very least, i’ll leave you songs that you can sing to yourself when you’re lost and conceited, trapped in your mind.

even if you choose to find another lover in my absence, even if you allow yourself to become just as lost in him as you have me, i’ll ensure that you never forget the feeling of our love, embedded in the stars.

i’ll ensure that youll never forget my smile, or the way i make you feel unlike any other. i’ll leave you with blessings for you to find one similar to myself, knowing that i’ll always be in the back of your mind, success in the path ive paved for many to come. i’ll leave you with all that would be better left with you, i’ll leave you with illustrations of the stars in the skies when you fog my mind.

and before i leave this forsaken town,

i’ll make sure to tell you i love you this time around.

i’ll send you letters addressed to our sun kissed skies,

i’ll make sure that you know that id catch your favorite star in the sky if you wanted me to.

[melodythebunny]

Time to ramble about your OCs. Any OCs you have, tell us about them? What's lore do you wish to tell of them? Funniest things about your OCs? What inspired your OCs?

I wanna ramble about my original work ocs... Bc its been a while since i talked/thought about them. Let alone drawn any of them.

So ill answer this with my original characters if that alright

👉👈

i have a bunch of ocs. Many are still in drafts cuz ive been busy with fan works. But i have two to 3 series one i am trying to turn into an animation series (@the-mis-adventurers ) and another that is gonna be a collab comic series with @strawberry-mangoprincess (she's more active one her Insta compared to me lol) one is just merely a fun concept i think about every now and then.

Overall my ocs are inspired by other fictional characters. mainly from whatever media i consume and enjoy.

Starting with the concept one.

I only have two ocs made for it so far. Ember and Crystal. They are sisters with fire and ice elemental powers hence their names. Ember like fire embers and crystal like ice Crystals. Orphans dunno who there parents were. Not clear if their powers ran in the family/curse/etc.

Ember always had trouble controlling her powers especially with having a fiery temper. She's the more friendlier sibling however. Crystal despises her ice powers. She has an easier time hiding them so she can blend in with normal people. (I gotta draw them again sometime)

Crystal doesnt hate her sister but isn't close to her either. Feeling the need to take care of her since she's the last of kin.

And now for my (slightly) more thought out ocs from my wip series, the misadventurers

In a nutshell i want this series to be about the power of friendship (i blame my mlp phase for this-)

There's four main characters. All girls bc why not?

Their names are mink, jing, Raine and jennifer.

Mink is the more calm and responsible one out of her friends. Mom friend type. Her hair was actually blonde but turned pink to unknown reasons. (I took inspiration from lofi music when creating her) She proudly owns a pet turtle named fern. Will kick butt if her friends are hurt.

Jing is a goth who enjoys making music. she plans on startd her own band someday. (Eventually she does with her friends. Its called rock n pop. Pending title for now) has a rivalry with another oc of mines, Lillian. Loves to scare the others with pranks and horror movies.

Raine is the artist of the group. She tends to break the fourth wall whenever she wants. Also whatever she draws with her paint brush becomes real. her name is also a pun. Raine strom. (You can see her on my tumblr header harassing my old sona) Very zany in a good way. Has a crush on a dense boi*

Jennifer is a social butterfly. Heart's too big for her sleeve. Pacifist. Tends to let wild animals in the house. And thats how she got a pet goat who may or may not actually be one. Her mother wishes she'd be more responsible.

Now for some reccuring characters-

Lillian - famous star, used to be childhood friends with jing. And now they hate eachothers guts. Primadonna gurrrrllll. All she ever wanted was the worrrrldddd(Took alot of inspiration from the song for her) is an attention hog and will do anything to be popular.

*Milo - Also known as peppermint boi/j. But seriously look at his color pallet-. He does enjoy mints and always passing one out to people. Very dense and doesn't get when he is getting on someone nerves. Just as zany as raine. Uber positive. Don't let him get too excited tho. Cuz he'll LITERALLY explode.

Cole - college drop out. Wonders why the haystack milo and raine won't leave him be. Also tends to be their third wheel on their 'not' dates. He hates it. Very moody. Legend has it he's never laughed or smiled before.

Derek - just some rich dude. Comes up with so many back stories like Horst from ratatouille so its hard to tell which is fake and what is real. Tries really hard for Jennifer to fall for him but doesn't work out.

I already rambled to you about max and min. Buttt I can tell you a it more about them at least about their absent/missing parents

Thymes (pronounced Times) and Divid are the twins and Equan’s Parents.

They are both scientists who worked for [REDACTED]. Thymes and Divid were both pretty much crazy but in a ‘not so dangerous’ type of way.  always ready to invent stuff even if it held no actual purpose.

It did concern them greatly when Equan started going through a Frankenstein phase. At least they assumed it was. Probably didn’t help much they were pretty much working even at home leaving their kids pretty much unattended(And boy oh boy did they learn…)

And sadly disappeared due to unknown circumstances.

[sapphicsunfox]

Its so painful to just accept that she hates me. I think I coped deluding myself into thinking that haha she couldnt truly hate me. There was love there. It cant just die. And even if she didnt love me, there has to be at least something other than hate?

But she despises me. She says i made her miserable. And i know its valid and of course that might be true. Maybe i did make her miserable. I was a lot to handle, i was shaken, i was hurt, i didnt have any tools, i was suicidal. And I regret the colateral damage i caused to those who cared about me. And im sorry i didnt give you enough time, and im sorry i dumped my sadness into you. Im sorry i didnt tell you enough times how much I loved you. Im sorry i took you for granted cause breaking up with my soulmate was unfathomable. Im sorry i didnt try harder, that i didnt ask harder. I wanted to love you right. All i wanted was to love you right cause what was the point of loving if you dont feel loved back? Im sorry i didnt know how to handle it ans caused you pain. Im sorry i didnt communicate better. Im sorry for the times i was scared and it hurt you. Im sorry i didnt express better. Im sorry i made fun of a show you liked. Im sorry i didnt take you on more dates. Im sorry i didnt ask for more clarification when you said you wanted a break. I got scared. I thought i lost you (i did). I never wanted to lose you.

I know now it doesnt matter. I can be sorry all i want, i can better myself and learn and improve and become a bettee person, but to you ill always be The Toxic Ex. And im sorry about that, too. You also were that for me, for a while. It took me a long time to accept youre the person ive loved the most and i couldnt hate you. Not when i was so happy you loved me I cried when you said for the first time. Not when i couldnt hold my smile when i looked at you. Not when i wanted you to come live with me so your mother wouldnt hurt you anymore. Not when i wanted to travel the world with you and have a dog and a rat. I wanted to be your family. I wanted to cherish you. I loved you.

I love you, still.

So it hurts that you genuinely hate me and i made you miserable. But youre allowed to. Its not my place to change your mind, to make you talk to me. To message you. You have your life, you have a boyfriend. Youre probably not even living in this city anymore. I dont wanna let you go, i dont want it to end like this. I want us to talk and make amends. Hell, even as friends. I dont care. I just want to make sure you know i loved you with all i had in me. It was very broken, but it was all yours.

But you despise me. You think my art is shitty. You think im shitty. I think you were the love of my life. I cant hold on to this tiny hope that maybe, maybe if we talked- its gonna destroy me. Its destroying me already. I wanna throw up, im anxious. Im hurt. I wanna make things right.

You blocked me the second you came across my shitty art, and i respect that. I have to, for you and for me. Im sorry I even thought about messaging you. Im sorry for the messages i drafted. Im sorry for the messages i sent. I was desperate, to be honest. I never wanted to lose you. You were my everything, but all I did was made you sad, right?

I hope your boyfriend treats you right. I hope you find happiness and joy. Selfishly, I want you to think of me and wonder what if. I want you to wonder if you should send a message. I want you to stalk my socials just to know how I'm doing. But I can't keep being selfish. We deserve better than this one sided thing I have going on. And im sorry I didnt get to make amends. I wish you had apologized, too. I'd hold you. I'd cry, probably. Always been a bit of a crybaby. I'm so vulnerable when it comes to you.

If you see me on the streets, I hope you say hi.

I love you. Im sorry.

Maybe in another life.

[lemonhemlock]

Hello:))This is the first time I'm writing to you and I must say that I like this blog and the way you always eloquently explain your stance on things, especially when it comes to hotd and got related content. Therefore, I would love to read your opinions on these questions:

1) Have you read Dunk and Egg novellas and if you have, what are your impressions about the storylines, characters, tone, plot twists? Do you have any predictions about the show they are making based on those and what would you especially like to see?

2) I've been discovering recently that many green supporters prefer Daemon Blackfyre over Daeron. I don't know why, but this kind of surprises me since somehow I've always thought that the green fans would be more inclined to Daeron since the rumours about his bastardy always seemed fake to me. What is your opinion on this and who is, according to you, the right side in the First Blackfyre Rebellion (if you think there is one at all) and why?

3) This one has nothing to do with any fandom, but I would like to know is there any book you could recommend to read. As for genre, anything goes, really, although my favourite is probably historical fiction (and metafiction).

what a lovely message to wake up to, anon, thank you so much! i hope you keep enjoying your visits to my blog and know you are always welcome back

1) unfortunately, no, i haven't read the dunk & egg stories, but my boyfriend has and now he is re-reading them and pestering me to read them, too, so i will probably get on with that sometime this summer. to be honest, i'm not very hyped about the show, although i will definitely be watching, so i'm keeping an open slate as i don't have any particular investments. i am cautiously hoping that the show won't be as divisive as GoT or HotD, though

2) i am surprised to hear that daemon blackfyre is popular among the greens. so far i haven't stumbled upon many instances of such discourse, but i haven't particularly been looking for it either. bear in mind that i am no expert on this period in the targaryen reign, though, and these are my first impressions, so to speak.

i don't think daeron is a bastard - to me, that sounded like an obviously fabricated lie by his shitty father, especially since this rumour just so happened to rear its head when aegon iv and daeron were arguing over invading dorne. given how much aegon iv despised naerys and aemon, i don't believe he would have kept quiet about it for so many years. with his type of personality, he would have punished naerys and aemon way sooner had he suspected his trueborn children were, in fact, illegitimate. bear in mind daeron was born in 153 and the rumour was spread in 174 - so that's a lot of time for someone like aegon iv to practice self-restraint. also, the fact that he ultimately never implemented his threat to disown daeron must say something about the validity of his claim.

as far as who is "right" in the blackfyre rebellion, i am inclined to choose daeron. the arguments in favour of daemon (at least what i've seen) suggest that he was innocent of treason and that daeron arrested him without cause, thus, basically breaking the social contract and forcing daemon to start a civil war to defend himself. i personally believe that is an extremely charitable interpretation that is not much supported by the text and, in addition, i don't think grrm is the type of storyteller to create such a blameless victim in the character of daemon blackfyre. not to mention the fact that his personal favourite, bloodraven, fought on daeron's side, as well, and it is very likely that blooraven fits the typology of someone who may be "right" in principle, but whose methods become very questionable as time goes on

in any case, sure, the last part can also be considered speculation on my part, but, as far as canon texts go, we have The World of Ice and Fire, where it is suggested that daemon entertained rebellious talk around him for years and ultimately decided to proclaim himself king, forcing daeron to call for his arrest. could this be the biased interpretation of a maester, masking how daeron was, in fact, the instigator? of course, but, we will have to wait for Fire and Blood II to come out in order to compare the accounts. until then, it would be misplaced energy to become a die-hard for either side, if you ask me

3) i've been slowly trying to get back into reading again, but not everything i finished in the last few months has been a hit. :)) i will, however, make perhaps a slightly atypical suggestion with The Pursuit of Love, written by one of the mitford sisters (nancy). since you mentioned historical fiction, this one was published in 1945 but is set during (and pre-) WWI. anyway, it is (imo) exactly what a romance novel is supposed to be - light, breezy, funny, endearing and ultimately touching and bittersweet, with enough exploration of human character for it to stick in your mind. it is crazy to think she wrote this having grown up in a family with extremely contrasting political views (i believe she had a communist sister and two straight-up fascist ones). she had a v peculiar life and infused many elements from her childhood in her writing. the book is not weird in that regard, though, and nancy is characterised as a "moderate socialist" so it's not a super <problematic> read (we are on tumblr, after all), although it does ultimately carry some aristocratic affectations

and now for some shameless self-promotion - one thing i've certainly been busy with is finding many, many examples for the prompts in my reading challenge (link). :)) if only i would be as prolific with my reading goals as i am with making lists! (but maybe you will find something there to your liking?)

[ithisatanytime]

Little chick - Original video by Mindia

they literally believe or at least attest to the idea that the god of the old testament is literally blind, and also a kind of devil, but the devil is actually jesus christ, and they know this because of the bible that says the opposite of all this and a bunch more scrolls from thousands of years ago that just so happened to be found in some pots in a cave in the last hundred years by a boy who radomly through a rock at some patshards and some shcizo rambling from albert pike. its bullshit, its the most bullshit thing thats ever existed, i read both the nag hammid libraries and the other one the dead see scrolls, i wasnt convinced, it was close! it was close i can see how one might be tricked, especially if they had previously sucked cock and were looking for some convincing sounding cope. life is actually good, the god who made it is good, the parts he made are good anyway, the parts your father made are ass and thats the parts everyone points to when they talk about the fucking demiurge. nature is sometimes brutal, but most of the time its mild and serene, its the people.

more than anything they hate me for this shit, this is how they get the goyim to do their bidding btw, what you thought they let them become full blooded jews? no they get the lion snake cope.

 what are the odds btw of a pot sitting in a cave undiscovered, unburied, and unbroken for two thousand years? the odds are fucking zero. the bible is the book, everything else is cope, the jewish religion didnt come first, they dont follow the old testament but the talmud which is the written version of the oral tradition of the pharisees which the god of the old testament despised. the talmud was not written until 800 ad at the latest or until this argument catches on and some fucking goatherder stumbles on a trillion year old pot in a cave. let me say it again, Christianity is the original, they will spread all kinds of lies to make it seem like no its an amalgamation of early canaanite pantheons, etc etc. the bible was the first of its kind, and the prophesies recorded in that book written two thousand years ago are true today, christ was hitler before hitler, kanye before kanye, calling them out to their faces, how incredible that a book from 2000 years ago not only manages to be relevant but EDGY? its no coincidence, if earth were a fantasy realm that you were reading about called Gorn, and there was a 2000 year old book in this universe called the cryble, and the prophesies lined up from that book as well as the bible does in our universe there would be no doubt in your mind it was divinely inspired and probably tied to the mainplot of the game you were playing.

 god is not blind you are. blinded by the pride of your own understanding, hey ive been there too. i dont want to be in your fag club or in any fag club, i prefer my own company and always have, god walks with me, and your time is coming to an end. repent means in its most literal sense, to change your mind.

 im not a catholic, dont take my constant crusade against liars to be a call for your personal repentance, i obviously have a pillar of salt in my own eye. it is really the liars, im nice to gay people in my day to day and trans and whatever. not because im scared of retribution but because i love them deeply. not because they are gay but in spite of it, just like they love me in spite of my wrath. i cannot love a lie and claim to love my brothers, if my brother walks down the road and is heading towards a concealed pit trap meant for wild game and i do not warn my brother do i love him? does it make a difference or not if i the day before fell in that very same trap? does it make me a hypocrite?