#look there’s something here and I don’t have the headspace rn but

[sunfire-shield]

Something something Viren insisting that “even this goo-spitting homunculus does not deserve a name as undignified as Sparklepuff” something something the way that Soren insists that Deadwood Elmer deserves dignity and that manifests as Elmer insisting that his proper name be used

[hana-no-seiiki]

HAIII!!

ignore this if u want cause idk if this is in the yandare category and this is so embarrassing to say without asking anonymously anyway butt

animal shapeshifter!reader!

(( now do you know that thing animals (usually any tyoe of dog or cat, im thinking dog though) get where they have a sudden blast of energy and run and zoom all around until they get too tired to even walk? yeah, they call it zoomies!!)

i kinda imagine the (if you could even call it) yandare to be damian tbh cause..idk i just like damian

NOWWww imqgine the reader running away from *character* so they decide to shapeshift to an animal in order to run faster, but THEN they get tge zoomies due to the situation making them hyper :3 but oh! reader uses it to their advantage and go all in running >:( but poor reader, they forgot it would just take all their energy away! so now reader is just poorly running limping away while *character* is just mere few feet behind from them, teasing and mocking them for even TRYINg to run away!! so now *cgaracter* just carries reader back while theyre still in their little animal form :(

ok im so sorry i feel so embarrased this is so bad and weird and oh god

😭☹

NAUR THIS ISNT BAD AT ALL NON!!!

I love shapeshifter reader with Batfam (but Damian specifically since he owns so many pets and is an absolute softie for animals) !!! I’ve written around 3 here from what I can remember

Here are some headcannons cause I’m not in the headspace to write a full fic rn and I want to get this out for you as soon as possible

If you aren’t a flexible shifter/can only shift into a dog, I feel like they’ll use not just your zoomies but many of your dog characteristics as an advantage.

Bruce and Damian specifically would abuse it and force you to become a dog once they learn the secret behind your powers

Tim might as a way to make it easier to handle you, but prefers you as a human. He does like to observe and take notes of your preferences as doggo tho and definitely keeps a large stash of treats for you to enjoy.

Jason and Dick will use it as a last ditch resort

But all in all, especially Dick, Jason and Damian will definitely make fun of you or tease you whenever you try to run away in your dog form. Your pathetic attempts are just too cute for them to handle at times.

Bruce would prefer you caged, and would probably double the security measures of your stay.

Jason likes to take you out on rides sometimes, and blackmails you with how you look out from the car window, tongue out, drool everywhere.

You’re gonna have to cling unto Tim, maybe Damian, for dear life if you ever want to be treated normally by those people.

Together? Whew.

Often they might act like you’re their pet or do something degrading out of habit.

Tim’s the only one that’s hyper cognizant of your humaness. Like I only see him ever cooing at you if you were a cat and cradling the scratches you give him.

Non, you don’t know how much I’ve imagined cat shifter reader with the batboys im hard brainrotting now and AAAAA

In short, if you think being able to shift is convenient. You would be very wrong.

[sister-lucifer]

what’s wrong with you based on your favorite batman villain

(don’t take these too seriously)

(sequel to this post)

The Riddler: Holy shit shut the fuck up for two seconds PLEASE. i know you have a touch of the tism and crave to derail every conversation to talk about your special interest but no one else is having fun. this is why you don’t have any friends. You also have a very niche and the second most expensive taste in clothing so you only have like 3 outfits to mix and match. You either dress like you’re going to the Met Gala or like a dad on vacation, no in between

The Penguin: STOP FUCKING IMPULSE BUYING!!! YOU HAVE TOO MANY TRINKETS!!! YOU DONT NEED IT JUST BECAUSE ITS PRETTY!!!! You have the most expensive taste in clothing, especially victorian undergarments, and spend an embarrassing amount of money to dress like a vampire. And stop being so hard on your body. It might not always be the perfect image of what you want, but it’s doing its best, even if you have to help it out a bit.

Harley Quinn: Sweetheart, I promise you are more than just your sex appeal. I know you grew up around misogyny and were raised to be a housewife but you’re free now!! Well…you would be if you stopped picking the shittiest men. A relationship does not define you, stop settling for assholes because you feel ashamed for being single. Have you tried dating a woman? No, seriously, try it. You deserve it

The Joker: Stop using your humor to deflect from your trauma, i bet your back hurts from carrying the weight of being the funniest person in your friend group. You’re a big time maximalist who spends an hour picking out a hundred accessories to wear and wind up being late because you couldn’t choose which kandi bracelets were best for the occasion. You’re still holding on to the last shreds of your teenage edgelord phase. Also clean your damn room and throw away those old drink cans, nasty ass

Catwoman: How does it feel to be the sexiest person in the room at any given time? Not good, I bet, since you struggle to make friends because of how often they wind up to only be after your body. Sorry you can’t catch a break. You’re probably still carrying money saving habits you got from your parents when you were a kid even though you don’t need to now. Also please try wearing a color besides black, it’s almost summer, you’re gonna die of heatstroke. Nice eyeliner though

Poison Ivy: Dude, so many people are crushing on you rn, how do you not see this?! You’re so hot but soooo emotionally unavailable, christ. A boy in middle school said something uncomfortable to you once which was then reinforced by the misogynistic micro aggressions you were subject to as a teenager and it’s kinda tainted your entire view of the male gender, which is fair but also kinda sucks.

The Scarecrow: Daddy issues, daddy issues everywhere. He was scary as fuck, wasn’t he? Your fear was valid. You really love to analyze people which wouldn’t be an issue if you could actually be subtle about it. Stop staring, you creep. Also, that flannel doesn’t look as good as you think it does, you look like a depressed lumberjack. Like please just buy a cardigan. Halloween is your favorite holiday and you get really annoying about it around mid august. And remember to brush your fuckin hair for gods sake

The Mad Hatter: You get like…reeeeaaaally weird about your crushes, man. Like whatever you’re doing it’s not normal. You can just talk to them, you know. You have the weirdest sexual interests but they’re more so hyper specific and niche than gross or unsettling. That’s better, I guess? You gotta leave your headspace and live in reality for a bit, man. I know it kinda sucks, but there are real people here! Also you’re short. Gross

[boydepartment]

Hey Jayjay, hope you’re doing well~

I just wanted to make a request for a Jake comfort fic, where he’s comforting reader after they’ve had a break down from holding their emotions in for months and didn’t tell anyone bc they don’t know how to express themselves to people?

Sorry if this doesn’t make any sense I’m not in the best headspace rn. But please don’t feel pressured to do this request if it makes you uncomfortable🫂

ON IT- i started writing this right when i got the request, i love you so much <3 dms always open bb

Condensation- Jake Sim x reader

warnings- mental breakdown, fainting

wc- 600

MASTERLIST

The room was absolutely spinning, and you weren’t drunk or anything. You weren’t high and you weren’t sick. You were overwhelmed. Absolutely everything overstimulated you and you were exhausted. The room seemed to be going a mile a minute and all you wanted was for it to stop. You wanted everything to stop for once. Life was hitting hard, and you didn’t know what to do or who to turn to.

Everything got so much that you didn’t even remember inviting Jake over, when the doorbell rang you stumbled to answer. Once again, not having the mental capacity to even think. You swung open the door and the next thing you knew you blacked out. All the stress and nerves absolutely draining your tired self.

When you woke up you were in your bed, water was on the nightstand, and you took a split second to watch the condensation fall from the glass onto the bedside table. Whoever left it didn’t put a coaster or anything down to protect the wood.

You turned over and felt a weight down on your bed, looking up you saw Jake sitting there on his phone. He looked down at you and popped his headphones out.

“Oh, thank god you’re awake.” He put a hand on your head, “fever? No. cough? Cough?” He was pretty frantic about the state of your physical health. He had no idea it was your mental health that was causing a decline in your physical wellbeing.

“No cough, just exhausted…” You mumbled and rested your head down again.

“Did you go out today or something?” He asked, trying to figure out what was wrong so he could help you. Jake was always very pure at heart, if something was wrong with you, he wanted to be there and help. He would never not go out of his way for you and your wellbeing. That’s why you never told him about how overwhelming your life had gotten recently. You hit a brick wall and how was he supposed to try and fix something that seemed so unfixable?

“Y/n?”

“Huh?” You realized now, you never answered his question, “oh sorry. No, I didn’t go out today.”

“Thinking too much?” Jake suddenly asked. You looked up at him.

“Yeah…” You swallowed hard, feeling that familiar lump in your throat. It hurt badly, trying not to absolutely break down hurt badly.

“You can talk to me, I can’t fix all the mental problems, but I can still help.” Jake said, he held your face softly, “I know it’s really hard though- opening up.”

Finally, the dam broke. You started crying hard. Jake held onto you and let you cry it out. He always knew you had issues with vocally saying how you were feeling. He knew you didn’t want him to worry, even though he was going to worry anyways.

“I-I’m sorry I don’t know what came over me I can’t stop-“You continued to cry and Jake rubbed your back softly and slowly.

“Let it out Y/n… It’s okay. I am right here, I'm not going anywhere.”

You continued to sob until you started to doze off again, all those overwhelming emotions once again took you out. You hadn’t realized how much these past months of bottling your feelings took out of you. You were constantly battling by yourself, and it finally caught up to you.

When you woke up from your post crying nap, Jake made you drink water.

“If you don’t want to talk about it still it’s alright.” Jake said, “I’m still going to be here though. I care about you and I just want you to be alright.”

You looked at him, “I think- I think I want to talk about it.”

[thickenmyblood]

maca this chapter was insane i was kicking my feet the entire hour I took to read it!!

but can I just say as much as I was team damen in the beginning cause I didn’t fw laurent’s whole approach to the breakup…..I don’t get why damen was so upset with laurent abt the needing a lawyer reveal when he immediately recognised that it was obvious that laurent continued to stay with him because he genuinely loved him.

Don’t get me wrong I definitely love that you took that approach cause your writing is so REAL and Damen recognises he’s being an idiot sometimes!!But I didn’t expect Laurent to not push back abit in some sense like he was just a traumatised kid barely a year older than nicaise is rn when they met (if i got the math right on that).

anyway I think I just wanna hear more about your thoughts on Laurent’s headspace if it’s not spoiler-y ofc. Thank you for such a brilliant chapter and happy holidays ♥️♥️

hello! i was actually talking to @savoytrufflephd about this the other day. this is terribly long but we're reaching the end of the fic and i will never get the change to speak on these things again, and so i hope this answer guides your reading experience and helps clear any doubts you might have going into the last chapter.

about damen:

during their argument, damen is gutted to find out that laurent approached him because he needed a lawyer and money, and, indeed, damen doesn't have an absolute "let's berate laurent" meltdown right then and there, but i wouldn't say he "immediately recognized" anything.

there are three main emotions at play during the reveal scene.

sadness: damen feels deeply hurt by laurent's confession.

There is nowhere to go. There is no other sound in the world but Laurent’s voice, tearing him open.

They should be doing this in the kitchen, Damen thinks. For old times’ sake. For symmetry. There must be a reason why Aimeric keeps picking kitchens as his bleeding spot.

anger and/or self-righteousness: damen makes comments to hurt laurent and express the hurt he's feeling himself and how he feels cheated and wronged.

(...) Was a live-in nanny so expensive that you had to spend the next four years forcing yourself into bed with—”

“You were nervous. Before. I remember the—was the bathroom break so you could vomit in between—”

(...) So you stayed up all night, going through that—that shit, and you had ten liters of coffee this morning so you could be brave enough to sit here and tell me that I was your pimp for a while. (...)

“I wouldn’t blame you,” Laurent says, “if you—” “Don’t play the martyr card.” “I’m so—” “Fuck you,” Damen says.

defeat: damen slowly realizing this is the worst case scenario. there can't be anything worse than this, and so it's almost a relief to hear it because he 1. didn't have to ask 2. can't imagine any other blow hitting him harder (which... i mean, he did have a heads up from nikandros). now what he wants is to understand how this happened and why.

Something is leaking out of Damen now, except it isn’t blood. He feels it by its absence, by the relief it leaves behind. This, he thinks, as he looks at Laurent. This is everything they have done to each other. There is nothing left but this: the wound, drained; the wound, re-dressed. This is what he wanted to know, what he asked for. This.

He might as well lay down on the table and pass Laurent the knife.

He wants to feel stupid and can’t, wants to lather himself up in hatred to slip away from this with ease. He can’t. He’d thought in those first months at Nikandros’s that he knew what hating Laurent was—annoyance, mostly, and contempt, slightly—but now he knows that wasn’t hate. He could never hate Laurent. Maybe he could learn, could train himself to do it, but he doesn’t want to. He wants to understand. He wants—

damen is not the best when it comes to understanding his own emotions. later on, when analyzing this argument with neo, this happens:

“I don’t know how it made me feel,” Damen says. “I was angry yesterday. At him. And I know I should be angry now, or earlier when he said—when he told me.” “But you weren’t.” “I wasn’t sad either. It was like…” “Like?” Damen smooths over the sheets beside him. The bed is cool and neatly made on that side. “Like I’d been waiting for him to say it for so long, that when he did, it wasn’t… I don’t know.”

he did feel all those emotions in the argument, but when asked to talk about them, he holds onto defeat instead of anger or sadness. i wrote him this way because i wanted a version of him that was tired of arguing with laurent, that didn't want to do that anymore, that wanted things to be fair between them. plus, i wrote very early on that he's just not very creative when it comes to (active) cruelty. it just doesn't come naturally to him.

now, about laurent:

i agree that this laurent reads very passively. he doesn't strike back, doesn't argue that he was desperate, that it wasn't his fault, etc. this is because:

he's being self-hating. this is him basically telling damen "look at what i did and hate me for it. i don't deserve the way you've always helped me, the way you're STILL helping me. i'm not a good person. i'm not who you think i am." this is why, in this fic, laurent also allows nicaise to treat him like shit. it's the reason laurent did not tell agnes about the verbal abuse he was being subjected to. he thinks he deserves it. it's the reason he tells damen having sex with maxime was a chore and still he kept doing it.

like damen, he's also tired of arguing. in fact, i would say he's MORE tired than damen. he's getting the worse of nicaise's ire and has been for months. he knows damen is upset with him bc of that 10 minute conversation he had alone with nicaise in ch18. the day before, damen looked him in the eye and told him it was all his fault, that everything wrong that happened with nicaise was on him, that he was to blame because he was too busy having fun and being stupid to take care of the one person he was supposed to look after. he's emotionally drained. he spent the entire night looking through nicaise's phone, analyzing dates and punishing himself for everything that happened. after almost 400k words of fucked up situations, he's finally reached this strange limit of "whatever, just let it end".

the self-fulfilling prophecy aspect of his relationship with damen. in a way, laurent never dared to hope what he had with damen would be forever. in fact, he believed in order to keep damen, he had to sacrifice many, many, many things and aspect of who he was and is as a person, because otherwise damen would not and could not love him. things like his mental health, his own abuse, his views on sex... but also small, stupidly vulnerable things, such as letting your partner know that you fucking douche!!!!!! letting him know you do things every other human does. laurent wanted damen to love him, but he didn't think damen ever could if he showed him all his cards and baggage and whatever you want to call it, and so he made himself palatable. and this was, ultimately, the downfall of their relationship (along with damen's obvious ignorance, emotional issues, repression, etc.)

this is all i can say on laurent's end. ch20 will give you some more details to help you look at his actions and thought process throughout the fic in a different light. i hope this answer made sense and wasn't just me babbling for seventeen thousand words.

thank you for your time!!

[vibratingskull]

Hello hello! I have another request if you don’t mind.

Could you do a single dad Thrawn & female!child!reader? headcannons or a story I don’t mind! If you want to do a story an idea could be that maybe reader had a pet snake and the snake passed away and Thrawn if telling them about the life cycle and helping get over her loss?

Or another good idea is that she hurt herself (idk maybe she fell down or something) and he’s conforming her? I’m in a need for some Thrawn comfort rn 😓

Please have a good day!

Aaaaaaaaaw ❤️ Dad Thrawn is best Thrawn. Here you go, soft dad Thrawn comforting you his daughter

I hope you'll feel better soon ❤️

Thrawn & Daughter!reader

Thrawn opens his eyes immediately hearing your sniffs, well awake in a second, he knows something is wrong.

“Visahot? Is something wrong?” He raises on his elbow, his red eyes shining in the dark of the room.

Your red eyes shine less, a testimony of your headspace right now. You sob and rub your eyes full of tears, gasping to breath.

“Its… It’s… Its Cheple… He doesn't move anymore…” You manage to say between gasp.

“I am coming.” 

Thrawn stands on his feet, taking your little hand and walking to your room on the Chimaera. He never gets mad at you for being awake at night, he works on the assumption that you have a good reason even if you’re just reading past your bedtime. He will chastise you gently and sit on the bed to read you a final story then tuck you to bed.

But tonight you don’t seem to want a fairy tale.

He approaches the nest of plaids and clothes in the middle of your room, where Cheple, your pet serpent likes to curl up and sleep.

“I… Hic… I wanted to hug him but he didn’t move at all…” You explain.

He kneels next to the nest, observing silently the corpse of your snake. He delicately takes the head in his palms but Cheple is soft and dangles without reaction.

Poor little creature.

“What’s wrong with him?” You look at your dad with eyes full of hopes.

Dad knows so much, dad can do so much, surely he can help! But he turns to you and shakes his head, holding your hand.

“Visahot, there is nothing else to do.”

“Why? Why doesn’t he move.”

“He is dead, my darling.”

You look at him shocked and mouth agape.

“He…? No! No, you’re lying!” You burst into tears.

Thrawn pulls you into a hug, holding you tight against his beating heart. You cry like you nver cried. Cheple was your oldest friend with your dad, you know no other kids on this planet but found Cheple as an egg years ago. Your little heart immediately melted for the abandoned egg, all alone in the nest and you took it back to the Chimaera, proudly showing him off to your dad. He helped you built a nest under a heating lamp and one day, the eggshell cracked and you witnessed Cheple first shy steps into the world.

You were inseparable, attached by the hips you run all over the Chimaera with Cheple circling your shoulders.

But tonight…

“I am so sorry, my darling.” Thrawn tries to soothe you, caressing your head and back.

“So that means I will never see him again?!” You cry.

“No my darling, you will not.” He admits gently.

“But I don’t wanna! I want him! Why can’t you do something?!”

“Visahot.” He parts from you, holding your shoulders in his large hands, “There are some things we cannot change, whatever we try or no matter our effort. I would do something if I could ease your pain, but life and death are beyond anyone’s power.”

“But…But…” You sob uncontrollably.

“He left because it was his time. We both knew he was getting old, we saw the signs. What matters is the love you gave him all his life.” He tilts your head delicately. “He is in a better place now.”

“My bedroom wasn’t good enough for him?” You let your tears flow.

“It was more than enough. He always liked to curl up and hide in this room specifically because he felt safe here. You built him a great nest that he appropriated for himself and tonight he chose to die where he felt the safest, in your bedroom, next to you.”

“Why…?”

“Because you signified safety and warmth for him. He was so small he could have been devoured by anything, but you were always here to protect him from anything and he untrusted you for his final moments.”

“But I don’t want him to go away…”

“We cannot control that, my darling. Sometimes death comes at your door to rob you of your loved ones, tonight she came for Cheple while he was peacefully asleep. He left while dreaming, without any pain or worry because he was at ease with you, he felt loved and protected with you.”

You sniff, wiping your tears off your cheek.

“You remember when he felt ill for the first time?” Thrawn  continues, “You dedicated all of your time to take care of him and for the first time he came to sleep with you in your bed. He saw you as his savior and benefactor.” He brushes your cheek with his thumb, “You gave him a life filled with adventure and love, and you can be sure the memories he brought with him are filled with your smiles.”

“But why tonight? Coudldn’t he have waited again a little?”

“No, my darling. He was an old snake you know, and that is the best thing that could have happened to him : getting old at your side.”

“So he didn’t leave because he didn’t love me anymore?”

“No, quite the contrary. He came to the person he was the closest to live his final moment because you comfort him and give him so much love.”

“It hurts, dad…” you lower your head.

“I know, Visahot, I know.” He presses your foreheads together, “But it is part of life, the best we can do is enjoy the ones we love to the fullest while they are here. Do you understand?” He asks softly.

“... Yes.”

“That’s my girl.” He kisses your forehead with so much love, “Are you alright?”

“No, my heart hurt really bad.” You complain.”And my stomach feels empty.”

“It is perfectly normal. It is because you loved him so much, it will hurt for some time but one day you will be able to think back fondly about him and only feel your love for him filling your heart.” 

“For how long?”

“For one month or maybe one year. It depends on the heart.”

“I am sad, dad.”

“Of course you are, my darling. And I am sad for you. Do you want to sleep with me tonight? We will bury him properly tomorrow morning.”

You tiredly nod and snuggle against your dad, burying your head in the crook of his neck, inhaling his comforting scent. He lifts you up and carries you back to his bedroom where he lays you down gently, sliding next to you and holds you close.

You keep crying for a moment until you fall asleep, exhausted. Thrawn didn’t stop cradling you against his heart, holding you as close as possible.

His dear little girl… He will arm you to fight life, to win everytime, but tonight, only time can help such a wound. So he keeps you close, giving you his full support and love, ready to face the harsh reality together tomorrow. But tonight, you’ll sleep soundly in his arms.

In security.

@bluechiss @thrawnalani @justanothersadperson93 @al-astakbar@thrawnspetgoose @readinglistfics @elise2174 @debonaire-princess @twilekchiss @pencil-urchin @ineedazeezee @mssbridgerton @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching @Cortisolcosplay @obbicrystaleo @germie2037

☆Tag list

[bruhhhh-huhhhhh]

Bean you're the best dude

So Im on a SB Daycare attendant spree rn because I'm not doing great and mans is comfort characters

Mayyyyyyyyyyyyy I perhaps get just random comfort with the daycare attendant?

FUCK THIS TOOK SO LONG IM SORRY

Daycare Attendant x reader

Comfort

stoppp this gif is literally so cute

Work today had been…rough to say the least. Not even just today, all week you’ve been working your ass off around the daycare and in parts and service, but no matter what happened you always ended up missing something or doing it wrong. 

But, much to your relief, your shift was finally over, so you did what you always did at the end of a shift. You went to go see your boyfriends.

The walk to the daycare was uneventful, other than the fact that a map bot scared the ever loving shit out of you. When you finally got there, you decided to take the fun way down (AKA the slide) and sit in the ball pit for a bit. 

Sun’s sensors went off, indicating that someone had just gone down the slide. So, he did what he always did when someone came down the slide. He came out of his room and looked out before swan diving into the ball pit. Sun maneuvered under the plastic balls, being careful as not to be seen, before picking up the person by scooping his hands under their arms. “Hello! It’s quite late- Oh! Y/N! It’s so lovely to see you!” Sun exclaimed, excited.

“Hey, Sunny. It’s nice to see you too,” you respond, starting to try and wiggle out of his hold. Before you dropped back into the ball pit, however, Sun moved you so that you were being held bridal style.  “Sunny, put me down,” you whined.

“Nope! You worked today, so now you don’t have to do anything too exhausting. Like walking!”

You rolled your eyes but let him continue to carry you all the way to the child’s play area, where he sat you down at one of the mini-tables. He left you there, with a can of Fizzy-Fazz, as he went to grab some paper, coloring books, and crayons. Sun practically ran out, not wanting to make you wait too long. When he got back, he dropped them onto the table. “We’re gonna color now!” he exclaimed, grabbing a coloring book and placing it in front of you. 

For a little while, you two colored and talked about your day. Sun talked about how some of the kids and how they were so well behaved today, and you tried your best to talk about some of the good things about your day.

There weren’t a lot.

“Sunshine, what else happened today? Surely that can’t be everything!” Sun exclaimed. He knew that you always had a busy day, especially if he and Moon did. 

You grimaced a little bit and took a sip of your Fizzy-faz. “Work wasn’t great today, Sunny. I don’t wanna be a bother by dumping it on you two.”

“You aren’t gonna bother us! We’re here to help you, you know. You’re always so nice and gentle when you help with maintenance, and you always come and visit us when you finish a shift. The least we can do is help you out.” Sun sounded very gleeful as he went on and on about how amazing you were.

That rant lasted about 15 minutes before he realized that you hadn’t responded. He looked over at you and saw tears streaming down your face.

“Oh! Y/n, I’m sorry! Are you hurt? Did I upset you?”

“You didn’t upset him, dumbass. The sensors aren’t showing any sense of sadness,” Moon said from inside their shared headspace. 

“Moon! Language!” Sun responded, not realizing that he was talking out loud. 

You let out a small chuckle, already knowing the gist of what Moon said to the animatronic standing in front of you. Sun snapped back to attention and stood up, walking over to your side of the table. He picked you up, again, and gave you a long hug.

“You didn’t upset me, Sunny. It’s just… I really needed to hear that,” you say, your voice slightly muffled.

“I know, Sunshine. But you looked like you needed a hug.” You could hear the tremor in his voice and the way his fans were working harder to cool him down. Sun still wasn’t quite used to initiating affection, so the fact that he did makes him a little more flustered than usual. 

He pulls away for just a second to scoop you up, bridal position, and carry you up to his and Moon’s room. It’s not messy, exactly, but it also isn’t as spotless as the rest of the daycare. There’s a bed in the corner that the boys got after you started coming over after your shifts. 

Sun sets you down on said bed, making sure the stuffed animals themed around the other animatronics didn’t fall off the bed, before getting on himself. He looked awkward, his large body taking up a good bit of space on the bed. Not that you minded, of course.

The two of you cuddled, Sun as the big spoon, and you the little spoon. You rant about your week while Sun just holds you and nods along. You guys stay like that for a long time. You’re so deep in your rant that you don’t notice that the lights have turned off and Moon had come out. 

“And then Natasha had the gaul to tell me that I was an idiot for not doing it right! Like, she would have made the same fucking mistake!” 

“I’ll chat with her, if you’d like,” Moon said, rubbing a cool hand across your cheek.

You jumped slightly, but leaned into his touch. “You shouldn’t do that. She’ll get all defensive and probably get on my ass about it.”

Moon simply shrugged and pulled you closer to him. 

“How were the kids today?”

“They weren’t that bad. A few kids didn’t want to nap, so I let them color as the others slept.”

“That was nice of you.”

“What was I supposed to do, force them to sleep? That would have just made them upset and I’d have to deal with it.”

You smiled. Even though he didn’t want to admit it to anyone else, Moon was a big softie. “Of course, of course. Anything else?”

Moon hummed. “There was this one kid who was having a nightmare, so I woke her up and had her lay on me while I played my music box. She slept well after that.”

You stayed silent for a bit, debating whether or not you wanted to ask the question that was on your mind. 

“Could you… could you maybe turn it on now?” You asked, slightly nervous.

Moon made a noise of agreement and flipped a switch on his back. The sound of his music box filled your ears, and you felt a wave of exhaustion fall over you. Moon hummed along with the music, his voice box a good match for the pitch. Your eyes started to become too heavy to keep open, and you fell asleep.

[liquorisce]

i miss so much when you were on your active era here!! those asks were so fun ☹️🫶🏻

i knowww it was a super fun time! i really cherish all the fun conversation and headcanons we played with. i was reading the priest au posts and i saw that it’s been 2 years since then!! or more even! lol. i really appreciate that i had that fun experience with you guys ❤️

but i also recognise that im in a different headspace rn.

the truth is that i’m so obsessed with the fics that i’m actively writing that i can’t headcanon them with anyone else. idk if you noticed, i barely talk about them on here, except to share snippets. it feels like i’m in a very committed relationship with them lol, im obsessive, i feel possessive, i can’t share anything other than little bits i feel like sharing with the world, bc enjoying my own fics in secrecy, by myself is so so satisfying. i can’t engage in other headcanons— not even bc it would be like cheating— but bc i simply don’t possess the bandwidth to be flirting with another idea! idk what other metaphor i can use here so humour me, im going to be dramatic lol: i am in a torrid love affair with my own writing and i don’t want to get out of bed and host tea parties with my friends. i don’t want to look away from my lover. and i don’t want anyone to look at us until something i am working on says: darling, i feel like going out tonight! and then i snap a picture and share it on here lol.

for me personally it’s a great place to be. i don’t feel insecure as a writer anymore. i read so much. i try to experiment with style, i write whatever the fuck i want, i’m working on original fiction. i love my work even if no one reads it. and you know the best part of not putting your ideas on display? they stay lovely.

there are no anonymous passersby who can judge the worth of my idea and call it disgusting or tell me i deserve to be raped. there is no one telling me i am a bad writer and that i should learn from a different writer whose fics have more kudos than mine. there is no one telling me what a character will and won’t do. nobody else has the power, only i do and i love that.

so i think im going to stay in this space for a while :) hope you’re doing well anon!

[lovelyinspiration1463]

Loki S2 E3 Spoilers Ahead!

My thoughts while watching the episode for the first time:

Is that him as a kid?

I considered for a hot second that Loki might be that horse.

There is never a moment too dire for Mobius to grab a snack, and I relate to that on a deep and personal level.

Boy, Marvel will do anything to plaster their name on screen as much as possible.

*science mumbo jumbo*

I think this variant has gotten himself electrocuted one too many times. 

I wouldn’t be standing right in front of that, my dude.

Well, yeah, now he’s giving off more ‘take over the world’ vibes. Proper Frankenstein over here.

Prototype? Yeah, no kidding. That thing let off a few bright sparks and then just died.

Mustache guy looked so scandalized, I can’t  😭😭😭

“Hornswoggler”? That is my new favorite word.

Is that an offer or a threat? Sounds more like a threat.

Where can I get myself a guy who will pass out money at the snap of my fingers???

I know it’s loud in there, but is no one else hearing the talking purse?

Nice cover, Mobius.

Oop. Old hornswoggler is back and wants a refund. I’m shocked. The machine looked so impressive just… fizzling the way that it did.

This has very quickly become a Charlie Chaplin sketch.

Okay, first of all, Mullet Hair, can you chill??? Killing the same dude over and over and over again is not gonna secure free will for people! Can we discuss? For even just a millisecond?! Are we able to think through our actions?

He ruined your life? Listen here, Sylvie; while you’ve been living it up at McDonalds, the universe has been falling apart! Think outside yourself for two seconds!

His face! 💀💀💀

Are these two seriously having a moment? Cease and desist immediately.

“A long time ago-“ in a galaxy far, far away. No, wait; wrong franchise.

That’s your biggest takeaway? Seriously?

“Rat bags”? Mustache Man is just full of zingers!

Did Loki literally just run in a circle??

Ooh, Miss Minutes is a bit snappy. She really wants everyone to know how clever she is.

Oh my gosh, they are not cramming another slapdash love story into the show 😫 I do not care about this! I came here to see Loki! Every second he’s not on screen, a little part of me dies…

Miss Minutes in the background: 😞

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

I have a feeling Renslayer is suddenly gonna be much more amenable to joining Loki and Mobius now.

All those mannequins are so creepy. 

A Rolodex? That’s his life’s work?

Okay… this just got weird on so many levels. 

OKAY THIS JUST GOT SUPER WEIRD! 🚩‼️🚨 IF SHE POSSESSES ONE OF THOSE MANNEQUINS I AM SO OUTTA HERE

🎶 People always told me, be careful of what you do, don't go around breaking young girls' hearts. And mother always told me, be careful of who you love.  And be careful of what you do, ‘cause the lie becomes the truth - hey hey!🎶

Dude, how did she even get here?

*dramatic entrance at the perfect time*

Mobius, look at her! I don’t think Ravonna is in the best headspace rn.

How many people are gonna barge in here??? Does he have any security at all? Even a single lock?

Also, are we really doing this again? This episode is bloated with will they/won’t they moments. It’s a “won’t” from me. I’ve decided.

The hair! 😍💯

So is Loki just gonna lie there and watch, or…?

So everyone gets free will but him? How do you know he won’t make better choices? He can’t be the one singular person in all of existence that is fated to be something specific!

Okay now I’m starting to feel a little bad for him.

“I can make my own choices.” That’s what I’m saying!

Who put Sylvie in charge? I’m sorry, but last time I checked, Loki doesn’t answer to you!

Seriously? You’re just abandoning her there??? Murder was a bad thing two seconds ago and now you’re both chill about it?

Aww, poor Sylvie. She really is the greatest victim in all this. How dare she be forced to decide to obsess over something 🙄

Yeah, I’m not sure sticking the two of them together is a good idea. I mean technically he’s dead, but what has that ever meant in the MCU?

Oooh, never mind - he’s dead dead. …Well, even so. Loki’s come back from worse.

Can any of these characters just pick a side?! Stop betraying each other so often; I can’t keep up! Who’s working with who???

[lightlycareless]

CHAPTER 31 WAS SO,,, DELICIOUS,,

they're on a date! the worst date in the world, but its a date! good(?) for them?

naoya in the parking garage trying to flirt and failing so so miserably is so... truly incredible. in any other scenario it really would've been sweet and fairly good flirting but with the full context its so. he's really oblivious here.

THE CROSSWALK?? HELLO?? HE'S JUST NOT GOING TO SAY ANYTHING?? like firstly y/n go OFF thats RIGHT fucking GET HIS ASS "don't fucking touch me" is completely appropriate-- but then also he just. he doesn't say anything. i was fully expecting it to come up again but he just doesn't??? can he just not process that without his entire psyche crumbling down around him or is he gonna bring that one up again later

the poor waitress. she deserved a 500% tip for dealing with them. poor lady. once again i understand why naoya is worried-- yeah, she hasn't eaten like all day! she probably looks pale and shaky as hell (this is because of you, naoya, but he wouldn't know that). totally understandable to try to insist she eats something- but there's just no way that him trying to force her to do anything is going to help at all.

also.. the zenin's would cancel his credit card/access to the bank account if he did something wrong? fucked up and pretty indicative he's on thin ice here too even though he's (undeniably) doing better than y/n. i'd imagine that's not helping put him in a good headspace for self-reflection if he knows straying too far from what his family approves of could mean losing a lot of personal freedoms (including the ability to even leave the estate, recalling what he said about replacing the car in chapter 29...)

THE LITTLE GIRL W THE BUTTERFLIES WAS SO CUTE,,, and then naoya has to swing in like "i think you're pretty too 🥺" and give her a whole traumatic flashback like. man. just be quiet. you could salvage so many of these situations by just being quiet.

and they FINALLY,, had a CONVERSATION,,, even if it was something mundane like the records!! they talked to each other without snapping or insulting or being sexist!!! we're winning so hard rn-- and is she about to drop backstory for him too?? and about the parents?? now thats a BIG step i'm so excited for them (<- is about to get emotionally devastated by the next chapter)

another beautiful chapter of my favorite horribly misfunctional couple <3 thank you for the wonderful writing and i hope you have fun on your break!!

HELLO!!! I’m so happy you enjoyed the meal 😈

I love hyping the fact that they’re on a date, and yet, it couldn’t be any further from the truth 😂 It’s like a car crash you just can’t stop looking at ahahahah

I think it’s pretty obvious by this point that Naoya does not know how to socialize without looking completely creepy/frightening. And I can’t blame him, he’s either venerated as a god, or completely dismissed and berated 💀 STILL FIXABLE AMIRITE?

The crosswalk scene… I can literally hear Y/N’s voice and the way it broke… I feel bad for her damn why am I making all characters suffer?? Who is the one character that is happy??? No one. That’s who lol not even Haruko who is like the most cheerful of them all is happy all the time. 😭

And he did bring it up in a way 🤭, with the stupid question of “Do you speak to Naoaki like that?” omg please Naoya… take that man out from your mind hahaha it seems like you’re in love with him I s2g 😭😂 but as I said, Naoya doesn’t it have in himself to do anything like that anymore, as much as he wants to yell and whatnot, he knows very well that if he does that thing he’ll just push her away—definitely. And in a way, I want him to do that, leave Y/N alone!! (yes, even if she has to eat, leave her!! She’s not going to eat with you PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE)

Also, for the credit card… I just thought it would make sense hahaha for a family as rich as theirs, I just felt like that’s the next thing they would do 🤔 I don’t recall stating Naoya to be some kind of big spender (He might be... let's be real), but I do think that the Zen’in have spent a lot of money on their wedding and all the formalities that followed suit, so for them to consistently bring problems… well, I’m sure Naobito has thought many times to just leave his son without anything to really teach him a lesson—but stopped because he doesn’t want to deal with his whiny son any more than necessary lol, but Naoya doesn’t know that 👀 so he’s out there living in the suspense of having to be careful with his actions, less he wants to lose more. Gee… HOW DOES THAT FEEL NAOYA? HMMM???

I LOVED THE LITTLE GIRL, I was so happy that happened lol I think Y/N answered to her because she reminded her of Mai and Maki 🤭 which Naoya had to obviously ruin by his unrequited comment lmao. Even if he meant it like something genuine, why… couldn’t he see how painful that memory was for her? Omg is she even his wife???????? You’re right, he could do so much better if he just kept quiet 😭

Their conversation is something else that I was looking forward too :> and while it’s from something a bit… well, different from the elephant of the room, I share your sentiment by saying it was refreshing to see them interact with one another like actual human beings… I want them to be together, HAPPY I MEAN. Oh well… if that won’t happen, we have Naoaki lol

As for the backstory, yes, she’ll also share it with him :> Although I intended it to be a combination of a “reader exclusive” + “what’s she’s willing to share with Naoya” kind of perspective, if that makes sense, I’ll try my best to define it so while writing the next chapter 🤭. And even if this isn’t as emotionally impactful, I think the ending will have you a bit like “oof, that’s rough buddy” HHAHHAHAH

Thank you so much for your support and kind words 🥺❤ I’m so happy you’re liking the shenanigans between the couple of the moment lol (dysfunctional is like an understatement for them tbh they're beyond that 😂😂😂😂😂) and it kind of pains me to have to leave, but gotta do what I gotta do… haha

I’ll do my best to have fun :>!! Which I doubt I won’t have, I’m super excited!!!

Once again, thank you so much for your continuous support 😭❤❤❤❤ Can’t wait for you to read the next chapters!! (Specifically that one…. Jkahgakskjgv) Have a wonderful week, take care, and hope to see you soon!!!

[mostlyvoid-partiallythought]

idk who still looks at my blog so here’s some stuff about me for some info! mostly for myself to catalog where we’re at rn but also to share and reconnect with y’all if you’d like!

hi! I have many names, whatever you know me by is probably fine but you can ask if you’re not sure!

current passions when I can spark them are djing, diy fashion, and facilitating community and healing of myself and the people I love

overall I am an autistic, plural, anarchist, neuroqueer, agender, acespec, kinky, polyamorous, trans dyke and I am partnered to my lovely girlfriend

plural headspace is run by an old transmasc cowboy, an outgoing transfem streamer/raver, an agender cyberpunk/creature, and a sad enby archaeologist, with a coydog, two dragons, and a few others tagging along for the ride (and let us tell you, it’s a bumpy road)

in the past, different alters have been interested in and posted a lot of different things, and you may have known one or a couple of us better than who mainly uses tumblr now, but we’d love to reconnect even if we don’t generally participate in the same fandoms etc. anymore!

this blog is currently highly aesthetic based but frequently contains nsfw (mostly text posts), slur reclamation, kink (including cgl), horror, and gore, minors please dni, and if you don’t want to see these, I do try to tag things (and let me know if you want something tagged) but please unfollow if you don’t want to be around that type of thing!

[sharkface-daydreams]

well, sharkface. if someone has suggested before then maine (or bonus meta)

you are actually the first to ask about sharkface :) <3 ilu

oddly enough no bingo BUT shrakface <3 :) he is everything to me

and honestly on second though maybe he does work better as part of a dynamic bc on his own, hes very cool and scary and the ridiculousness of his dramatics works great against the reds and blues very “wait what? the fuck is that why are you so cringe” reactions to things. but characterly speaking like. this is a guy unhinged by grief. the loss of people that were close. he is unhinged BC he has no people anymore. if he had people i think that would be so good for him 🥺 kimball and wash hold fire and red team adopt sharkface challenge pls

also carolina learn what an apology is challenge jfc

i will not get into the wasted potential thing because i feel like i have screamed about that so much and i dont have the energy rn lol

BUT. thank u for ask me about shark man <3333 makes my weird little heart all glowy inside

maine gets double bingo bc hes special to me. <33333 big guy. likes to fight,  doesnt like heights, doesn’t talk much, likes big weird weapons. a man after my own heart. needed more screen time imo

like he’s not a saint but people characterizing him as some. idk. sadist evil motherfucker always rubs me the wrong way. also maine =/= meta. but maine is part of the meta. u understand.

meta also gets double bingo bc im lov them <3333333333

i want to recoup some energy so i can talk more about meta bc he is my special little guy they are my big silly blorbo blob so this is going in drafts a minute

edit: did i never fucking post this?! i thought i had..... anyway. ill post this and then go look for it bc ill forget it in the drafts again

OK IM BACK

meta!!!!! honestly. to me. meta is a journey. a transformation. never fully solidified, always in flux. by the time they are actually the meta it is no longer sigma here and maine there in the same helmet. putting more and more fragments in the same organic mind must have been mental hell in a few ways for someone unused to this. the chaos. the fragments were from the same ai but they were still their own selves. u get it.

theres no way to know what went on in there the whole time and i dont trust rt to write that but he’s still. very special to me. especially post-emp. they are gone. his(their) head is empty again. quiet. 

personal headspace stuff warning for those who’d rather scroll by:

especially early on in 2020+. i got locked in my head a lot. my little subsection of our headspace is an oubliette/panic room bunker cylinder. i’ve since been able to add windows and i know i CAN technically get out now. but for a long time it was just me, and an impenetrable wall of fog with no way out, and only a window way up in the ceiling i couldn’t reach. no one could reach me, i couldn’t reach out either. it was extremely lonely, very grey, and it just made me miss everyone i was able to talk to before. this is probably why i feel so attached to him, because i know what suddenly being shut off from all your system members feels like (idc that it was artificial bc the fragments were intentionally inserted, they were a system.)

feels like someone stripped you down to your OS when that happens honestly and you have to keep moving in a world that expects something of you yet. what do you do when you are back to being just one person alone in your head? how do you figure yourself out? other characters have said the meta was seeking more power... but that’s not right, i don’t think. when sigma& were in there, in the meta soup crockpot. they wanted to be human. be whole. reaching that metastability. and after they were gone. do u really think he would not have jumped at any chance to get one of them back? yeah AI are powerful. but so is loneliness. 

i think maybe. if he would have lived. he would have had little introjects like epsilon made. maybe a neosigma. maybe there was a partition he started putting up when everyone else got too loud and split off a separate maine that was buried when things kicked into high gear. i dont know. there’ll never be any of this in canon so it’s only my speculation but. i like them, i like to think about them.

there show distinctly separates this transformation into several parts but only because that’s all they show us. they show us pfl maine with no ai. they show us pfl maine + sigma. they show us the boogeyman the meta is made into through the lens of hte other characters. they show us a meta a bit more clear-headed but still in possession of personality, sapient thought. but my brain wants to know (always) what happens in between. because it was never a light switch moment that caused these things, it was things stacking up over time, like anything else. i want to know how wanting to help sigma achieve metastability turned into acquiring the other fragments at almost any cost. it’s canon that the freelancers’ and ais’ personalities started to bleed into each other. how much of that happened more and more with each fragment they added?

hm. much 2 think about. i do have a meta lives au which addresses some of this. but i think i have spilled all my brainbeans and now i am tired again lol <3 but. ty for asking and sorry this sat in my drafts for months x.x ilu

[sunatooru]

wanted to start off by saying congrats and I hope you’re doing good. I had a request, could be smut or fluff depends on you. I’m such a suga and semi simp. I was wondering if you could prompt one where you’re insecure to the point where you have no self esteem left. you’re insecure about you being a big girl and you don’t really have a pretty face either. decent to say the least. you also have like self harm scars too have them like show you how much they adore you. you can add some extra characters as well (: thanks! (Personal struggles)

Hii thank you  xx I felt like this was an emergency and I’m writing emergency requests rn. Honestly I felt this request and so I hope this comforts you in some way xx

~

Warnings: Sugawara is fluff, Semi is smut (18+), soft sex, mention of self harm scars, feelings of body and facial insecurity and lack of self-esteem. 

~

Sugawara

It was just one of those days where your mind would wonder. The thoughts, you thought no longer existed, coming back to mock you. You became aware of yourself. The way you looked, the way you moved and the way you didn’t look like the other girls. The girls who were always complimented, adored and mentioned.

So here you were, eyes glued to your phone as you saw the beautiful people. Eyes running over your own body, fingers coming to trace the features of your face. It hurt. It hurt to know that you were not one of those girls on your screen. It hurt to know that you weren’t small and you didn’t really belong. Just there. That’s what you felt like.

Your thoughts were interrupted when the name of you lover, calling, appeared on the screen. It almost shocked you when a tear dropped. You couldn’t talk to him right now and after a few rings you decide to decline. Dropping your phone onto your bed, you walk up to the mirror and look at yourself. What did he even see in you?

Koushi knew something was wrong the minute the ringing stopped. You’ve never declined a call with him, always picking up on the first ring. His calls were sometimes missed but he was always eager to hear your cute voice for the voicemail. So, it made him concern when you shut his call down and he was on his way to find out why.

You don’t know how or when but he’s standing outside your bedroom door, cheeks a little flushed as he quietly pants. And then he sees you. He sees your red eyes, you tear stained cheeks and he knows he’s not leaving until you’re okay.

“Angel, what happened? I’m here to listen.” He cautiously walks towards you, an arm out in hopes your accept his comfort.

And you do, you grab his hand and he instantly wraps his arms around you. You cry silently into his chest, body shaking a little as you allow his presence to ease your mind.

When you tell him, he’s shocked. Does he not tell you how beautiful you are? You tell him how common you feel, how you don’t feel like there’s anything special about you and that at most you’re ‘decent’, whatever that means, he thinks. You explain your feelings and he hates it. Hates how you’re feeling and how you think you’re nothing more than decent. And when he catches you running your hands over your previous self harm scars, he’s had enough.

“Baby, please look at me.” And you do, his soft voice taking you out of your trance.

“You are beautiful, okay, beautiful. Decent doesn’t even describe what you are. You are amazing, cute, pretty and kind. So kind. When you smile? It’s makes me want to tell so many jokes so I can always see that smile. When you laugh and hold my hands? It makes my heart heart so fast it almost hurts. And when I hear you say you love me? It’s let’s me know that you’re the one. So please, I love you so much and you could never look ‘decent’ to me. There’s so many stars in the sky, all beautiful no matter what. That’s what you are - beautiful.” He closer a gap between your faces. Thumb rubbing your cheek on one side as he carefully lays you down on your bed. Gentle, warm lips connect to yours. You cup his jaw, pulling away you look into his soft gaze.

“Thank you. I love you so much.” You manage to croak out.

And for now, you’re both okay with that as you pull him back into a kiss.

Semi (NSFW)

You didn’t mean to get into that headspace. You just caught your reflection and didn’t like what it was showing. Your average looking face with your big body. You just didn’t like how you looked. You thought of the people around you. Pretty, nice body and rewarded for it. You pulled at your skin, crushing the parts of your body with your hands, hating the way it rolled and bulged out of you. You run your hands through your hair, fingers pulling at your strands as you start to sob.

“Ugly, ugly so ugly” you mummer repetitively, eyes scrunched that you didn’t realised your boyfriend standing and watching the scene with so much anger.

When he yells you name, you quickly swing around and cry at his expression.

He stomps towards you, hands clasping around your head and he smashed his lips to yours.

“Stop, stop, you’re beautiful, amazing and so fucking gorgeous.” And when you try to say no he stops you.

“I don’t know what you’re thinking but I’ll make those thoughts disappear, okay? I’ll do whatever it takes to make you know you are worth so much, because to me you are worth more than anything.” His eyes plead that you let him. Let him show you how he views you, how he hopes you could view yourself.

You nod and he pulls you back into a kiss, tender lips caressing you. Your lips, eyes, nose and he kisses down your body. With every clothing he slips off, he kisses the body part. He makes you look at him when he kisses your scars, whispering how much he loves you no matter what. But then the insecurity comes back and you try to cover yourself, suck in your stomach and altering your body. He hates that unnecessary effort you made, cupping your jaw he looks at you.

“Please relax. Baby, please let me make you feel good.” And you do, body slowly relaxing as he rubs his hard-on against you.

“All I did was look at you and this happened.”

“You’re so sexy to me, I love your body and how it fits with mine. How warm and soft you are when we cuddle and how cute you look when you sleep wrapped around me. “

You moan as you feel him stretch you, his eyes piercing into yours, full of love and adoration. He thrusts into you softly, humming in your ear as you hug his cock inside of you. Your neck decorated with his bites, your body arched when he pulls your thighs further so he can please you deeper. And when you beg for more, he smiles, your body jolting as he grips your hips and slams against you. Your hands tangled in his hair as he sucks and tugs at one of your nipples. His clasp tightens, the bed creaking at his force.

“Who’s beautiful?” He demands and when you don’t response and slams harder.

“I said, who’s beautiful?” “Me”

“Who’s perfect?” “Me”

“Who do I love?” “Me”

Happy with your replies he lets his hands add pressure to your clit, your moans letting him know that it feels good.

“Baby, fuck you look so good right now, shit no, you always look so good.” You clenched around him, his words making your stomach flutter.

“I’m- ‘m close please..” you squeeze around him and slips his tongue into your mouth as you cum. Your body slightly shaking as you hold his face.

“I love you so much.” You tell him, and he rest his forehead against yours as he cums.

“I love you too.”

[elytrafemme]

okay hi hello hi jumping up and down. system things tee he

also @evilpuzzlingpapercrown (hi it’s me puzzle and i’m taging my alt and writing on annon because i refuse to mention this stuff of main. i have… irls in there. i don’t want to have a long ass awkward convo with some of the more skeptic about system people i know)

this is going to be a load of rambles because yes ✨ but i would love to hear any stories/answers/assorted things you have to anything i ramble on about

the most immediate thing i can think of is headspace/internal word. i’m always curious as to how that works for different systems. i read somewhere that even singlets can have a kind of headspace which is cool. cool beans (beans that are cool) mine is simple af and confusing af. hashtag dinner theater

okay and also i can remember when i first learned about plurality beyond like stereotypical nonsense like 3 years ago. i thought i was plural for months but there was such a mental blocker on figuring everything out and i decided i was just a different brand of mentally ill. i then had like a questioning period every other two months until i did like extensive research on systems and plurality. turns out finding info from people who have the thing ur looking into is the best place for info and coping skills. \o/

okay unrelated i keep smelling maple syrup all day and i don’t know why. it’s good though so i can’t complain.

anyway do you have colors you associate with any of your alters/headmates? also i find the word headmate funny. like mainly because my college algebra teacher says “and you can get help on homwork with your roomates, suitemates, any of your mates!” and i giggle. checking my homework with the other dumb bitches in my brain. hhahahehe

okay a question! we’re there ever things that you had a very switched up opinion of or something before realizing you were a system. like having some time really enjoying one kind of music and then something in ur brain is shocked later like “huh but i liked this music more” when it was just two people liking different music? okay that was an elaborate question i might give another example thou. like uh….. style! having a part of your brain that really liked a specific style unlike what you mostly like and realizing it’s an alter being freaking vocal but only about this one specific thing. like honey you can indulge futuristic neon cyber punk whatever later. right now is time for jeans and a hoodie because i said so

oh yea do you do anything specific to try and like monitor your system? like for any kind of memory things or just yo keep track of switches. ect ect. you don’t have to answer that because that’s kinda personal i was just wondering if you had a method that worked well for y’all? tbh i am going through an assortment of attempts at keeping a slight track of things… it’s difficult tbh. sometimes there’s a really freaking apparent switch and other times i realize someone’s like here with me now i guess and other times there’s a moment and i’m like “wait i don’t remember this morning. or like this whole week. haha. wait.” ect ect

haha silly moments over here

okay and i should probably give a more thought provoking topic. like uh… oh yea! positivity time yesyes

has your self image/self perception improved since realizing you were a system in any way? is there anyway that embracing this all has helped you? ect ect

YIPPEE OKAY HI!!! Mare fronting rn but we have a lot of thoughts about this so idk if anyone else is gonna co con or whatever but hiii

so for us, the internal world/headspace kind of... barely exists? this i think is because our brain isn't very good at retaining pictures for a long period of time, like we've had difficulties in the past trying to envision a scene we're working on writing but not being able to get a clear picture of it for a while. it's not that we can't imagine things at all, but it's kind of tricky. also, we're a pretty new system. so as of right now, most of the internal world is just... if an alter is about to front, i can see them sometimes doing a specific action, but it's in an empty void of space. the other day i was trying to call dahlia out to front but she was sitting there reading and kind of floating in the abyss

we do have an exception which is more like the. hm. okay so we have the foreground of headspace, which is just what i call the headspace, and that is where all the frequent fronters are. then in the background we kind of have a place where shit gets blurry and its hard to tell delusion from internal world. but that's where we get things like the woods and all that

damn that's fascinating actually, i feel very strange b/c i really and truly did NOT expect to be a system, like, i'd done research on systems for ages but i think i just didn't know about systems that like... didn't have amnesia walls, or weren't specifically DID. and bc of that i like did not realize what i was experiencing... Was That. having friends who r systems really helped on that front i agree wholeheartedly

i kind of dont like maple syrup like as a vibe. it's so sticky. it like tastes fine and smells fine and whatever just. residue :(

HELPSDFKDFSHKSDF you rolling up to ur alters like Guys its calculus time ^_^ nah but in terms of colors uhhh well it's. pretty on the nose actually but yeah! dahlia is pink, klavier is purple, i am a more blue-toned lighter purple, nightshade is a very dark purple-grey shade, and some of the other bastards have colors but idk their names yet so it's hard to talk about them. the deer is iridiscent but most closely matches with very light blue and very very VERY light pink

NO BC THAT'S STRAIGHT UP HOW WE FOUND OUT BASICALLY. like to cut the story short i have dealt with bad identity issues for a while bc my consistency with interests and personality traits and opinions were so different. how i realized that it might be a system thing was bc one day i got super into the Met gala despite never having fucking cared for it ever before. and i felt very like not like "me" in that moment. turns out that was someone else i don't remember who now but yeah that kicked us off

wishing u a lot of luck with tracking things, unfortunately i have no strategies :( i actually really struggle to keep track of it bc sometimes i'll be wandering doing smth and go "wait who am i?" and then i have no idea and i'm like "okay well. not mare but whatever" and then maybe half hour later i tune in again and it's me again. also my memory is really awful and we're so frequently co con, and honestly i am around so goddamn much, that it's kind of difficult to tell. i remember all the clear switches bc i journal them later, but none of the times and i never know what happens in those empty periods. so yeah shits rough and i wish u so much luck w that

this is kind of funny to say bc i think it's caused both grief and joy, but i've felt a lot better about myself since realizing that i'm not the same host that the system had in the start. like realizing that i am a new alter that emerged mid-2021 and has been host every since explains so much. i experience such imposter's syndrome and one of the biggest issues i had was realizing i was aro-spec and ace bc i felt like in the past EVERYTHING was testifying against that. and it took me until like last WEEK to realize. yeah that's because those memories weren't you. you probably formed to BE arospec and ace bc of them actually. it's so validating.

also. it's just. it's kind of nice. to not be alone :')

and also also this is kinda too much info but being a system despite not having that much amnesia walls or anything, has helped kind of a lot with trauma coping. its made some things worse but i think once we know the other alters and things organize it;ll actually end up being easier to handle everything

thank u for the questions friend i <3 you

[gureishi]

OkAY SO HELLO AGAIN

my cat Tiko is EXTREMELY VOCAL to the point where he gets on my nerves almost every day. HES MEOWUNG HIS HEAD OFF RIGHT NOW LIKE BRO WTH I JUST GAVE YOU SOME ATTENTION

my mom's better at handling him than i am. im just way too easily irritated. AND LIKE he doesnt just!!! come over to me or my mom for attention! like bro you can just chill on my lap u know and i'll give u attention buT NOPE.

jdvdhsj okay sorry that turned into a mini rant

anyways sometimes i snap at him or even slam on the table (to make noise) to get him to be quiet (thats like, when im in school or trying to focus on hw, art, or writing -- or otherwise not in a position to get up and give him attention). doesnt always work lol... but i just get so frustrated. and i always feel bad but i honestly cant help it; i have a bit of a short fuse, at least when it comes to irritation (rather than anger). occasionally i pretend to through like, an eraser at him, but thats not as common.

so i guess im just wondering how saeyoung would react in those cases? especially the first ones. and i suppose this could get a lil angsty... i only say that because i can feel rn that i would probably feel so guilty for behaving that way in front of someone other than my mom.

it also has to do with that "getting stuck" thing. its hard to actually get up and move sometimes. AND IM ALSO A HUMAN WHO HAS THINgs to do and i cant always entertain Tiko just because he's bored or thinks something is wrong just because we've been sitting in one place for more than 2 hours and appearing to not do anything... smh

msvdjsbsj gosh this is probably so weird and specific lolol sorry 😅 but it is an almost daily thing for me.

and gosh this whole thing probably makes me sound like a monster 😭😭 if it means anything, i would never actually hurt him :(( and i never have in the 10 years we've had him. i just get frustrated so easily and his meow is very loud and sorta high pitched and piercing and persistent... sighh

[417]

You certainly do not sound like a monster! As I’ve told you, we are constantly whining at the dog because he is so very loud (and yes, we should train him better, and we’ve tried, but he is also anxious and my street is very chaotic 😭)

So anyway: I very much get it ❤️❤️❤️

Hmmmmmm what to call this...?

Saeyoung with an MC who gets annoyed at her loud cat

Everyone knows Saeyoung loves cats. What you also know, of course—and what he sometimes forgets—is that he doesn’t actually know anything about cats.

He is startled by the meowing, at first. He is fascinated with your cats: he thinks they are beautiful and charming and adorable and perfect in every way (much like you). He didn’t really expect them to be loud, though. 

His first instinct, of course, is to meow back. He has endless energy to play with the cats—after all, he hasn’t grown up with them, and he only sees the things that are exciting. And of course, they will end up in a long conversation, Saeyoung and the cat. Lots of meowing. Very vivacious meowing.

And look, if you’re in the right headspace for it, it’s pretty cute. He really just wants the cats to understand him. He wants to be their friends. (He wants to make sure he has their blessing to be with you, but that’s another story altogether.)

But if you’re not in the right headspace—you’re working, or writing, or drawing, and need some peace and quiet—it’s not so cute anymore.

It’s automatic: the cat meows, and you snap in response. You’re frustrated; you’re trying to focus, and the incessant noise pushes you over the edge.

And that startles Saeyoung, too. He’s never heard you snap like that before.

Immediately, you feel terrible—you’re hit with a huge wave of guilt. And it is double guilt, because he is here, and you love him, and you don’t want him to think badly of you. 

And you love your cat, of course. You didn’t mean to snap the way you did; you don’t want this beloved boy to think you are a horrible, cat-hating monster.

A moment ago, you rose out of your seat. Now, you sit back down slowly. You don’t really want to meet his eyes.

“Sorry,” you mutter. Your face feels hot. “I didn’t mean...”

He doesn’t say anything right away, and you can feel his eyes on you. You feel like you might cry. Oh, you think—he hates you now.

And the cat is meowing again, because of course he is.

“Hey.” Suddenly, Saeyoung is in front of you. He’s jumped up onto the table and pushed your work to the side—he’s peering down, trying to look in your eyes. “What’s wrong?”

You put your face in your hands so you don’t have to look at him. “I shouldn’t have reacted like that,” you say into your hands. “Don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Gentle, rough fingers on your face—and he’s tilted your chin up so you can’t help but look him in the eye. Ah, and for a moment you are lost there, as you so often are: his gaze is soft, and bright, and intense—once you are looking, it is impossible to look away.

“It was loud,” he says. “I get it. But why are you...?”

He cups your cheeks in both hands. And he probably shouldn’t be sitting on the table, but—but—his hands are warm and he is looking down at you with such deep affection in his eyes. 

“I got frustrated,” you tell him. “But I didn’t want to—I shouldn’t—act that way in front of you.”

His eyes widen. You didn’t expect him to be surprised, but he is—and he is blushing, which seems strange.

“You were trying to—?” He shakes his head, like he doesn’t quite understand. “Okay. Here’s what you have to know.”

He is still holding your face. And this is fine—you could feel his hands on your cheeks forever and it wouldn’t be enough.

“I love you,” he says firmly. “You...know that part, right?”

You laugh—perhaps a little wetly. You do know.

“My love is not conditional,” he continues. You take a shaky breath. “I love you when you’re happy and energetic. I love you when you’re working hard and focusing. I love you when you’re sad and need comfort. I love you when you’re irritated, or frustrated, or angry,” he says.

It is a flood of words, and they wash over you like a rushing river. Your heart is racing.

“You don’t have to act any way around me,” he tells you. “That’s part of the deal.”

The cat is meowing again, but you hardly hear him. Absently, you reach over and pet him. Saeyoung grins.

“And you love your cats,” he adds. “And I know you’d never hurt them just because you’re upset.”

You nod. It’s true. You wouldn’t.

“C’mere?” he asks. He holds out his arms and—oh, he is still sitting on the table, but—you stand, falling into him, resting your head on his chest. He wraps both his arms around you and squeezes you tight.

“You know the same goes for you, right?” you mumble, your voice muffled by his t-shirt. He giggles at the way you sound and presses his lips to the very top of your head.

“No matter what?” he asks. 

“Of course.”

He meows.

Oh, and he is meowing at the cat again: back and forth, as if they are chatting about the weather.

“Saeyoung!” 

You pull back and he smiles apologetically. “Still love me?”

You roll your eyes. You pet the cat. You pet his head.

You do: of course you do. Unconditionally.

[thisplace-ishaunted]

OKAY. how about. ricky overstimulating the fuck out of trans vin in the au 👀

LMAO that this was supposed to be 5 sentences because I sat down and out came a 1500 word notfic so here you go.

OKAY SO THIS TOOK ME A WEEK TO ANSWER IM SORRY

It’s after my second Trans!Vin fic for Kinktober, which, you know what happens there, and maybe some of y’all do, but not everyone does. So, just, use context clues and guess what happened.

Vin waits a solid 36 hours to initiate something with Rick bc he wants to wait for the bruises and hickies on his hips and thighs to actually get as dark as they’re gonna get. He’s going for maximum impact here. But of course, because it’s vin, it’s hard for him to wait that long because he is a horny mess and as soon as he finishes the shenanigans in aforementioned fic, he already wants to run to Ricky and be like “LOOK WHAT I DID BEHIND YOUR BACK WHY DON’T YOU FUCK ME UP FOR IT, HUH RICK HUH RICK.” But he knows he should probably wait. Give his hole some time to recover, let the bruises blossom.

SO they’re at a venue, and everyone’s inside and setting up and getting ready and stuff, and Vin makes a pass at Rick, being like, “Do you wanna go pound one out in the bus before the show?” And Rick is like, yeah sure why not, and he had actually been thinking what was going on with Vin for him to be able to go the past approximately 4-5 days without initiating anything with Rick, there must have been something going on because that had seemed to set a record for the longest amount of time they hadn’t fucked ever since they had first started hooking up. Rick had started to get worried, but, ole reliable (as in Vin’s aching, needy boycunt), has beckoned once again and Rick is here to provide. They go to the empty bus.

Rick barely manages to get the door closed behind him before Vin drops his pants and throws himself down on the couch, lifting his shirt up to his chest and showing off his hip bones and his belly and the line of hair that runs from the middle of his chest down the center of his body. He tangles his hands in his shirt and wiggles his hips and tries to look pouty but he’s also like, we are here for a reason so lets get to it before someone walks in on us or we have to go finish getting ready for stage.

Rick joins him on the couch, leaning down in between his legs with his hands planted on either side of Vin’s chest, Ricky’s hair falls like curtains on either side of his face, almost grazes Vin’s face. Ricky takes a second to appreciate Vin’s fucking beautiful face and how it looks so cute and pouty and he is so glad that Vin is so fucking needy all the time and that he entrusts Rick to be the one to help him take care of that. It’s like, an honor.

So they kiss for a while and Ricky runs his hands through Vin’s hair and Vin does the same and Vin is already grinding his hips up and into Ricky’s still clothed hips, but can feel his hard cock through the jeans. Finally they stop kissing and then Rick sits back and realizes what is scattered around Vin’s hips and thighs and his jaw nearly drops. He’s like “where the fuck did you get these?”

And vin is like, “somewhere.” and he still looks cute and flustered and he is doing it on purpose because he wants to get Ricky all fired up.

Rick continues to ask questions, “when? Where? How?” and Vin refuses to answer any of them, which ends up kind of infuriating Ricky but in the best way possible, but he really doesn’t give a shit who Vinny fucks around with.

Ricky slides his hand over Vin’s hole, he’s already fucking wet and dripping because of course he is. Ricky shoves a couple fingers in him, and Vin whines.

“If you’re so fucking desperate to get off all the time, then that’s what you’re gonna get” Ricky threatens and plunges his face in and starts sucking on Vin and still thrusts his fingers in and out of him.

Vin loves it and squeezes his thighs around Rick’s face and grabs hold of Ricky’s hair. And since there is nobody on the bus, Vin gets to be Loud As Fuck and he moans and whimpers and Ricky fucking loves it because only very rarely do they get to actually let themselves be loud.

Vin realizes that he isn’t gonna get out of this any time soon so he let’s himself relax. Well, relax as much as possible when Rick is sucking his dick and has half his hand shoved in his hole. The stimulation manages to get him to come again and then Rick sits up but still doesn’t stop, pulls his hand out and its covered in slick and he rubs at Vin’s dick. Ricky’s other hand traces along the bruises on Vin’s hips, and he presses into them, knowing it’s gonna hurt, but he wants to make them darker, wants to make them worse, wants Vin to know that he is malleable.

Ricky makes Vin come and then doesn’t stop, doesn’t come up for air, just keeps going at the same pace and Vin doesn’t even get the opportunity to recover because it’s like he is shaking and his orgasm doesn’t actually ever end up stopping because the stimulation doesn’t stop.

At some point, Vin shoves his fingers in his own mouth, letting his fingers slide over his tongue and there is already spit sliding down the corners of his mouth because it’s basically a pavlovian response at this point that as soon as something gets put in his mouth, he starts to drool like crazy, which is hot for him, he likes it.

“Desperate mindless slut just wants to come all the time, huh.” Rick says. Vin is too overstimulated at this point to even feel like he could come again. He is squirming and he feels like he has fallen back into the cushions of the couch and the back of his head feels all floaty and he isn’t even sure if his hand is still in his mouth because it feels like he has been taken out of his body at this point. He could open his eyes to look at ricky kneeling above him, but he doesn’t want to, he’d rather embrace it, let himself fall numb, fall mindless, let Rick continue to pump at his dick and push into his hips and mark him up, reminding Vin that he can let his body belong to Rick if he wants it to.

Rick likes what he sees below him, the way that Vin’s waist curves in just slightly, the way his hand is pulling at his mouth, his bottom lip pulled down and the spit running down the sides of his face, Vin’s hair pooled around his head, his eyes closed and a light blush across his cheeks, looking dumb and overstimulated and letting himself be turned to mush. Rick feels honored that Vin lets himself get in this headspace in front of Rick, because of Rick. There’s a lot of trust there, Rick takes it seriously. He knows that Vin is pliable rn, he doesn’t want to do anything to actually hurt him.

Rick still wants to make him come again, so he doesn’t stop with his hand. He leans forward, gets his face next to Vin’s, kisses up his neck and behind his ear, telling him about how he is so mindless and he is just a plaything and how his only responsibility is to let himself continue to be slack and numb and let himself come again. And somehow Vin manages to do it, to let himself come again, by this time it doesn’t even really feel much different than the sensations that were already happening, it just feels like a completion. Vin surprises himself when Ricky finally stops rubbing at him and within like 30 seconds he already wants more but he knows he probably shouldn’t and it would probably just hurt but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t cross his mind that he still wants it.

Ricky lays on top of him but makes sure vin can still breathe. It takes multiple minutes for Vin to come back, he starts wiggling his toes and fingers, bringing the sensation back, starts moving his face around and starts to make himself coherent again, tries to stitch up the parts of himself that he let fall undone.

Rick kisses along his neck, talks to him sweetly, but does realize that there is a sense of urgency here. Maybe Rick shouldn’t have done this when they have to go on stage within the next hour or so. Vin is gonna need a red bull or something.