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cherrywhite · 26 days

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So how about that new episode?

#the magnus protocol #tmagp #tmagp spoilers #the magnus protocol spoilers #sorry i do love compulsion as horror #yess sam. share your childhood trauma sam #struggle against it as your story is ripped from you while you're alone cold and in the rain #wish we got to properly hear gwen's when she was compelled

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giantkillerjack · 1 year

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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nothing-an-iratze-cant-fix · 1 year

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I’m curious - people always seem surprised that multiple siblings are queer, as if it’s amazing the gay lightning struck twice so close together.

But human variation is down to our genes and external factors. Siblings are logically more likely to both/all be queer than not.

So a wee poll if you don’t mind!

Anyone can take part, there should be an option for anyone but please let me know in notes if I missed anyone.

For reference: queer is anyone who wouldn’t describe themselves as heterosexual or cis-gendered or allo-sexual. Anyone we would include in the queer group. And if you’re not including people by their own identification, we can have words after…

Notes:

If you only have one sibling use the relevant all option.

If you have an issue with the word queer I truly don’t want to hear about it - that’s your choice, this is mine.

Reblog if you fancy! If you don’t then no worries, but if you can it would be nice to get a lot of replies!

And hey everyone, happy Pride!

#queer stuff #lgbtq+#queer #polls #asexual #and #aromantic #people - I want to hear from you too! You are valid and queer if you id as queer #if you don’t know about your identity or you don’t know about your siblings identity - first off; sending you love.#second; if you want to take part just put what you think is most likely or your most comfortable putting #❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

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christadeguchi · 6 months

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you think YOU had a bad day at work?

bonus: sid shrieking "no!!!! NO!!!!!" loud enough to be heard in the stands and on camera

#this is now my FAVOURITE game i've watched in real life knocking the game misconduct one off the number one rank #he was so annoyed the entire game and so annoying about it :')#he kept shrieking away on the bench and i couldn't hear a word from where i was seated #but you could just hear this constant yipping away dhfsgfkjshgfsjf PLEASE it was so funny your 36-year-old babygirl was BARKING #drew kept sitting there like... is mom okay... i don't think mom's okay...#also extremely good for me (since he wasn't really hurt) was the whumpfest of it all oh my god what ancient gods did he anger.........#geno kept Hovering in concern #po kept giving him little shoulder pats the way a sweet brave babyboy would try his best to soothe a rabid little dog #ek of course kept trying to slide right inside him and also kept skating up to him and STARING him in the face in concern/lust/both #also guys this is my first time in canada ever!!!!!!!! i'm excited #anyway. very good game for me sorry for this post but you know i love a #long post #sidney crosby #evgeni malkin #pittsburgh penguins #also!!! to all who celebrate #ramadan kareem/eid mubarak #<333 staying with a friend here through the eid celebration and they've been cooking and everything smells so good

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chloesimaginationthings · 3 months

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Woah.... may i request more tape girl.... and also phone dude.... and tape girl....... and tape girl..... and tape girl.......

I just gotta draw phone guy next and we’ll have the full set

#ask reply #definitely will consider drawing both of them again soon!#I do like em both a lot #ITS SO FUNNY I gave them both the same headphones by accident #ITS CAUSE both of them seemingly liked things from the past #TBH I’ll probably fix that if I draw em again #tape girl only has em cause she’s working so maybe phone dude will keep it #WE’LL SEE #SOON phone guy will be REAL with them #oh fnaf characters we only hear over the phone or recordings I love you so

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ohrackham · 3 months

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It is not what you do for me that makes me love you. It's your kindness. Your empathy. How much you care. Just being you is enough, Colin. I do not need you to save me. I just need you to stand by me. To hold me. To kiss me.

#bridgertonedit #bridgerton #polinedit #polin #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #colin x penelope #loved how colin came to terms with lw through pen's old letters #not hearing from her all summer sent him into such a tailspin that he had an identity crisis and invented a whole new persona #but rereading the letters he had missed made him realize that the part he wanted to separate from penelope was her all along #he had fallen in love with all of her without even knowing it #those letters and the lack of them were really the catalyst for his love for her #also how he admitted that his pride and ego got in the way because sometimes you can't help but struggle with feeling inferior #and unaddressed insecurities always come back #idk man #eight episodes of them telling each other you're enough you're good you're beautiful and i love you #mine

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frosted-co0kies · 5 months

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hc that kris s teeth glow

stole from this post. Kris you are so weird (affectionate)

#deltarune #fanart #deltarune fanart #deltarune art #my art #susie #kris dreemurr #kris deltarune #kris #susie deltarune #kris and susie shenanigans #and hijinks #words cannot describe how much i love kris and susies relationship #idc if romantic or platonic they are incredible in every way #if dr does not end happily for them you will never hear from me again #pls ignore the shitty shading of kris's teeth glowing i was too lazy to make it look good

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bishicat · 25 days

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You believe me like a god I'll destroy you like I am

:-).

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sergle · 10 months

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You!! Hey you!! Are you looking for a pair of kittens? Do you live In Or Near Oklahoma? Do you wish you could listen to purring all the time? Do you want a cat that looks like an aye-aye?

long story short, we found these two kittens at the bottom of a garbage can!! I don't like to think about how they ended up in there- but we heard them crying while on a walk, and it's very lucky they were so loud! They were scared at first, but now they NEED to be snuggled at all times. Crazy how adaptable kittens are. I'd prefer to rehome them as a pair, but I'd consider adopting them out individually if that's my only option! Please IM me if you're interested in both/either of these babies, or if you have any questions at all!!

#reblogs would of course be appreciated #kittens #cats #sergle.txt #WE'RE DOING IT AGAIN EVERYBODY LAST TIME IT WAS CHALUPA NOW IT'S TWITCH AND CHAT #please please please take these cats from me I swear to god. you will love them. something clicked in their heads and now they LOVE people.#I'm telling you right now that adopting cats as a Set is the best idea. there's no better way to have two cats that Get Along #and you get to watch them play. and bc they keep eachother company they can handle being left alone for chunks of time #Chalupa really needed all hands on deck but I actually think someone who works full-time could have these two no problem #because they keep themselves occupied if you leave them alone but are ecstatic when you're around #source: they are upstairs rn to keep them separate from our Resident Cats and I hear them galloping around all the time while they play.

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grimmtells · 24 days

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✦ DEDEDE, HE'S THE NAME YOU SHOULD KNOW ! DEDEDE, HE'S THE STAR OF THE SHOW ! Oh and Escargoon's there too.

Favourite comedic duo of the show, The Royal Pains In The Ass™ Only a king and his loyal right-hand man can do it like them.

#kirby #king dedede #escargoon #kirby right back at ya #hoshi no kaabii #kirby of the stars #kirby series #kirby fanart #krbay #grimm arts #artists on tumblr #i might love this pairing but you didn't hear it from me

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juha-art · 2 months

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ELECTROCHEMISTRY- No one will ever want to sleep with you.

Litany in Which Certain Things Are Crossed Out, Richard Siken

#disco elysium #disco elysium art #harry du bois #dolores dei #dora ingerlund #kim kitsuragi #harrykim #disco elysium fanart #juha-art #ok normal tags over time to go crazy. im working on a longer comic with text from the actual game about this imso normal about how harry #turns the people he loves into gods or angels or saints. immediately! he can say kim is too perfect to be human on day one. its crazy.#harry form healthy attachments challenge- composure [godly: failed]#Here is the part where everyone was happy all the time and we were all forgiven #even though we didn’t deserve it. Inside your head you hear a phone ringing #I take the parts that I remember and stitch them back together to make a creature that will do what I say. or love me back.#so many lines fit so well in this poem..maybe one day ill continue this #de poetry

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spielzeugkaiser · 2 months

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[MASTERPOST] - [prev] I just want you to imagine Jaskier, very early post trial, mostly nonverbal, not in control of his strength yet being just such a creepy kid sometimes. (His parents still love him obviously.) I also have a feeling that Jaskier is subconsciously 100% stressed at all times and wants to do his absolute best to please his parents and make zero mistakes so that they won't send him away again. (They didn't and he knows that, but he is just a traumatized child.)

#the witcher #jaskier #bear!jaskier #witcher!jaskier #the witcher fandom #the Jaskier wanting to please people to not be abandoned never quite leaves him completely #just as Geralt shying away from deeper connections so he can't be abandoned for his vulnerability #jaskier as an adult: ahhh I don't wanna fight I don't know howww #jaskier at like 10 years pulling his sleves up: no one's gonna scare my little sister #i have so much fun imagining jaskiers childhood in this verse #an (actually not that big jump if you think about it) thought: I always loved the superman comics about clark growing up in smallville too #because how do you deal with a kid with super strength and super hearing and night vision and-

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 2 months

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Ooh, you want to know what happens at the gay bar run by ex-pirates, ooh...You'll just have to read Tiger Tiger to find out...

(Inspired by this Disco Elysium comic)

#tiger tiger #remy bonnaire #Arno #jamis arlesi #f slur mention #(Remy is allowed to say it. Jury is still out on Jamis though.)#I love that disco elyisum comic so much. I have it saved in several places so I can find it to show people. I lost it once. Never. Again.#Hard lesson about redrawing/heavily referencing a beloved comic is that you will feel so inferior to its genius.#I did my best but I feel like I didn't hit the high notes I wanted. Such is art!#At the end of the day I have to remind myself that I'm still on a journey and not every piece is going to be my best.#Yeah I'm still on my Tigers propagana train. Toot Toot. All abord or perish to the Tigers.#I hear tigers are running the Olympics this year. That's right. It's tigers all the way down.#Obscure references aside; time to talk tigers spoilers:#I was absolutely losing my mind at Remy taking Jamis to the Starfall. He did *not* expect to be in a gay bar.#Jamis is our beloved bisexual lad but I don't think he's fully in tune with it yet.#How down right unfortunate that he is also the hottest cub in the room. Will he realize? What will he realize? Who Knows!#Thank you to everyone who checked out Tiger Tiger from my recommendations!#And thank you to my fellow Tigers fans for receiving my comics with open arms. Next comic will be about Rat Man.

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mychemicalbrromance · 1 month

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#1 like a prayer fan none of you understand (insane)

#the movie was made for me thats why like a prayer by madonna is there and thats why ryan reynolds went to madonna's house to ask for permiss #ion yeah #(delusional)#deadpool #wolverine #poolverine #cassandra idk her last name #ive been dreaming for 500000 years for SOMEONE to use like a prayer somewhere Thank God.#almost cried during the choir version in the movie oh my glob #i heard it in a trailer it was barely discernible i think i used that word right #anyways you could barely hear it in the one trailer i saw on tv (i wanted to go in blind) and i was like LIKE A PRAYER ???? BY MADONNA ??!??#like girl u have no idea #anyways ermmm the yappsterrrrrr #deadpool and wolverine #forgot this tag #i love you like a prayer by madonna #controversial music video but DAMN its a good song Ok Bye #yknow i used to associate the song with pucci from jojo idk i think i was in my jjba era anyways Byyyeeeeeeeee ^_^ bye bye (bye bye)#I LOVE MUSIC #1 MUSIC LOVER

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littlelightfish · 3 months

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Disliking Tallchuck is a MAJOR skill issue.

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maddymoreau · 1 year

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Thinking about how Diavolo’s feelings transcend time and how in the Nightbringer UR+ card Demon Lord’s Castle Tour this conversation happens.

When asked, “Do you wish to see your father?”

Diavolo responds:

“I suppose I do . . .” isn’t the typical reaction to how a child would feel about wanting to see their parent. Especially when said parent has essentially been in a coma for a year.

Along with how Diavolo describe his father.

It makes more sense why when you learn in Lesson 56 how Diavolo was treated by him growing up.

Diavolo can tell when others are lying but is unable to understand his father’s intentions.

Diavolo mentions that he lived a very sheltered life growing up. That from a young age his father never allowed him a chance to talk to anyone outside the castle.

His childhood friend was Mephistopheles. A demon literally RAISED to be his friend. Putting a barrier between the two because Mephistopheles would put Diavolo on a pedestal.

The isolating childhood he experienced riddled with his strict father constantly scolding him.

Despite everything MC is so important to him he wants to see his father again so we can meet.

#Demons and Humans can’t get married even in the present so it adds an extra layer him wanting to introduce us.#There’s a lot more you could add onto this (please do I’d love to hear other’s thoughts).#Like how Diavolo’s childhood affected him just look at the way he describes himself:#“The truth is I am a child in a way. A child who spends his time alone and never gets to do anything interesting.”#A lot of Diavolo’s poor behavior while not excused comes from his childhood.#How Diavolo admits to using his position to force others to do what he wants. Along with how he doesn’t like sharing.#Diavolo’s insecurities in his friendships with others.#Mainly Lucifer and Barbatos which makes sense with how they happened.#IE Forcing Barbatos to become his butler and the oath/deal with Lucifer regarding Lilith.#It’s clear Diavolo is very lonely and carrying a heavy burden.#I like that MCs presence is helping him change into a better person.#Also I don’t think Diavolo hates his father their relationship just isn’t good and very complicated.#Diavolo is such a wonderful character if you have any in-depth posts about him please tag me I’d love to read them!!!#I AM FILLED WITH SAPPY THOUGHTS ABOUT DIAVOLO TONIGHT!!!!#Obey Me #Obey Me Spoiler #Obey Me Nightbringer #OMSWD #Obey Me Diavolo #Diavolo #MaddyMajolish #Is it obvious I can’t sleep because I’m riddled with Blorbo thoughts

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