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amazingness-666 · 5 years

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Union Leader’s Little Baby (Arthdal Chronicles yaoi fanfic)

Tagon x Saya, Saya x Mubaek (open ending)

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When Saya was a baby, Tagon took him from the woods and raised him as his own. Saya was locked away soon after, left to his own devices for years and in the neglectful care of Tagon’s lover, Taelha.

Saya didn’t really appreciate being put to the side and forgotten like that. But what he really didn’t like was being put away while Tagon is off controlling Arthdal and fucking his woman. Especially, when Tagon came to him every now and again, telling him how pretty he was, how nice and volumous and smooth his hair was, and letting Saya know how tight his hole was. Saya didn’t really appreciate being treated in that way. Not at all.

Since Saya was secluded and hidden, he was used to being in the shadows. He was more than used to spying and getting in and out of places without being seen. His talents for sneaking around and causing mischief was mostly due to his discovery of women’s clothing. Because of his lithe form and long hair and strangely pretty face, everyone who saw him was convinced he was a woman. And in Arthdal, women weren’t really threats. Maybe his cross dressing should be a cause for concern, but Saya was technically a phantom. He didn’t exist, so he could be dressed up in nothing but his skin suit and nobody would bat an eye. Saya used this skill to follow his father around and attempted to draw his attention to himself.

Saya told himself that he wasn’t jealous at the way Tagon and Taelha paws at each other like they were desperate to be physically attached to each other or they’d die, mostly because Tagon would arrive to Saya’s chambers at some point in time, and fuck him so hard he couldn’t move the next day. Saya felt himself throbbed at the memories of how his father had grabbed his hair just the other night and pounded him into the mattress quite furiously, all the while pressing his bearded face into the crook of Saya’s neck while growling like an animal, ‘How is it? You now have my undivided attention. Make it worth my while, son, or I might not come back.’

Tagon would always come back. Saya knew that much. So he figured, whatever he does Tagon would forgive. Because Tagon would always go back to him. Saya could do whatever he wanted. So Saya began to drive a wedge between Taelha and Tagon. It worked thus far. Taelha was convinced something was wrong and Tagon was convinced Taelha was up to something. However, Saya soon learned that the connection between Tagon and Taelha was just too intense for Saya to truly ruin them. Honestly, Saya knew they were not really in love, in Arthdal where your enemies were next door, love between Tagon and Taelha was just impossible. However, Tagon didn’t seem to think so. When Saya once again attempted to lure Tagon away from Taelha, Tagon had given him a slap across the face and snarled, ‘don’t be stupid, stay where you belong, it is not your place.’ Saya did not want to believe it, but he swore he could sense the slave girl (who was brought to be his maid) quiet giggling.

Tagon had recently brought back a bunch of slaves from the place under the Black Cliffs. They made for a great price. However, not all of them were sold off. For some reason, Tagon kept this one slave. A girl named Tanya. And Tanya had been made Saya’s helper. They had a master and servant relationship, but, behind closed doors, they were on equal footings. Tanya had said, ‘have you tried jealousy? I’ve found that it is the most effective of ways to catch your intended’s attention.’ To which, Saya had replied, ‘I’ve tried numerous times to set Taelha up to seem as if she’s been unfaithful. However, my efforts were futile. Tagon knows she would be with no one but him.’ Tanya had given him a blank look at that. She said, ‘not her. You. You should try and make Tagon jealous.’

Ah, that was an idea. Saya could try that. But with whom? Tagon knew there would be no woman that can satisfy Saya. So a man? But whom? One of Tagon’s personal guards? They’d report everything back to Tagon. But luck arrived at Saya’s doorstep in the form of a handsome, morally correct, dignified, and skillful Mubaek.

Mubaek was one of Tagon’s most trusted soldiers, he was second in command, Tagon’s right hand man. And if Saya closed his eyes, Mubaek would even resemble Tagon. However, lately, Mubaek seemed to be doing something behind Tagon’s back. Something that Mubaek did not get Tagon’s permission to do. And so Saya set out to seduce Mubaek. Since Saya has a curvy body, although he was male, Saya was slim, thin, and fit. He has smooth, ivory skin from never being out in the sun, and his genetics allowed him to have long, flawless legs that seem to go on forever. His face was a pretty one, he could rival many beauties in Arthdal if he wished. However, there was only one that Saya wanted. At this point in time, it was Mubaek. Saya was aware that with Mubaek’s loyalty to Tagon wavering, it meant that Mubaek would not blindly run to Tagon to report every single thing that Saya would do.

And so Saya found Mubaek alone at night, Mubaek was busying himself with cleaning his sword. He still had the day’s grime and dirt on him, and Mubaek was shirtless. His chest was protruding out of his shirt and rippled as he worked. Saya walked slowly over. Mubaek looked up to see a gorgeous beauty standing across from him, gazing down with the most deep, dark pair of eyes. Mubaek was stunted.

Saya knew to act demure, shy almost as he hid half of his face behind his wavy hair, blinked slowly, and asked Mubaek for help. ‘Can you help me?’ Saya had whispered. His voice soft and sweet, and he made sure it trembled. Mubaek’s instinct to assist sprung to life and he stood abruptly. Flinging his sword up as a sign of threat. ‘What is wrong? Who is hurting you?’ Saya flinched, cowering away. He was wearing a flimsy robe, nothing underneath, a stark image of white amidst the dark nighttime and crowded woods. Saya looked like an apparition. Saya stepped closer, used his hands to lower Mubaek’s sword, and inched his way so that he’d stand directly in front of Mubaek. Mubaek swallowed his spits as Saya looked up at him from under his lashes, face pure and beautiful. ‘I need someone strong to help me. I need to be fucked. Thoroughly.’

Mubaek didn’t quite expect to hear such words coming from such a innocent face. He hadn’t heard this sort of phrase from anyone in Arthdal. Not even from the lowest of whores. And with his plans to stop Tagon from gaining more power undergoing, Mubaek hadn’t had any time to deal with his own problems. With the smallest amount of seductive urge, his cock immediate stood up at attention. Saya lowered his eyes, glanced at Mubaek’s rigid organ and smiled quite gently. ‘You seem eager. Do you know of anyone?’ Mubaek looked down at Saya, a contrast to himself, clean and white and beautiful, whereas he was dirty, grimy, and covered in sweat and dark clothing. Despite his skepticism of Saya being someone he hadn’t ever seen before, Mubaek numbly grabbed Saya’s ass without much thought and rolled the flesh around in his hand. Even his skin is darker than Saya’s. The revelation brought him to squeeze Saya tighter.

Saya gasped sharply. He hadn’t been touched for quite some time because Tagon was preoccupied with Taelha. So even the slightest touch would get Saya agitated. Saya began to pant slowly. He moved his mouth closer to Mubaek’s and inhaled the sweaty scent of him. Saya whispered, ‘you seem so strong, maybe you can help me.’ There really wasn’t much need for anything else. Mubaek grabbed Saya fully, pushed him flushed against himself, and gave Saya a bruising kiss. Desperate to give the young, beautiful male a sort of injury that wouldn’t go away.

Mubaek brought Saya safely back to his quarters soon after, they laid on top of his bed and began. Saya sinfully removed his robes, layers by layers, revealing inches of gorgeous skin bit by bit and taunted Mubaek into a painful state of arousal. Unable to bear it, Mubaek ripped the rest off and immediately latched onto Saya’s right nipple like a starved man. Saya moaned softly as his nipples were scratched and pinched and bit, he arched his back, gaining more contact with Mubaek’s mouth and his beard. Saya soon was dripping out of the head of his cock and he moved his hands down to touch himself there. He was skillful in this aspect, he rubbed his length, teased the slit, and used his precum to soothe the friction. Mubaek was not interested in having Saya touched only himself and forced the younger male to touch him as well. Saya was more than ready to obey, he ripped apart Mubaek’s pants, letting his dick popped out. Saya was a bit amazed, he didn’t expect it to be quite so large, but he soon got to work.

Saya pushed Mubaek onto his back and leveled himself with Mubaek’s cock. He began to sweetly lick at the head, securing the precum there into his mouth. Saya lowered as the sound of Mubaek’s groaning becomes louder. Saya darts out his tongue and began to worship Mubaek’s cock. He licked, he kissed, and he slobbered all over Mubaek’s. Mubaek soon grabbed Saya’s hair and forced Saya to swallow his dick fully. Mubaek might have seemed to be kind and nice, but he was a man, and he wanted dominance like any man would. He thrusted in and out of Saya’s mouth, relishing the warmth and wetness, he made noises that were loud and deep. Saya soaked up every sound that he heard and he started sucking Mubaek even harder. At a point, Saya deemed it was time and stopped. Mubaek voiced his disagreement but quiet himself as Saya lifted himself upward. Saya put both of his smooth, long legs on the sides of Mubaek and slowly lowering himself. Saya never needed prep work to make himself ready for a dick to go in. He loved the burn too much. He wanted to tear and bleed, more specifically, he wanted proof that he did this sinful conquest with someone other than Tagon.

When Mubaek slid in, Saya felt a piece of his mind slipped away. Mubaek whispered, ‘let’s give you a minute to get used to this’ but Saya disregarded his warning and impaled himself on Mubaek’s cock. Both gave drawled out moans at the contact and Saya wasted no time in bouncing up and down like a mad man. With his hair loose, his skin covered in sweat, and his expression that of a virgin getting fucked for the first time, Saya was a picture to behold. He was so very pretty that he made Mubaek abandoned his good natured worries and thrusted upwards at a maddening rate.

The bed began to creak loudly and the sounds of two people losing their sanity increased in volume. Mubaek growls his appreciation for Saya’s body and Saya continued to satisfy his desires on top of Mubaek. ‘Fuck, you’re fucking good. How have I only just found you now?’ Mubaek gritted his question as his nails left imprints on Saya’s hips. Saya moaned, rolling his hips, feeling his blood mixing with Mubaek’s cum, he stuck one of his fingers into his mouth and started a lascivious show of slowly sucking it and licking it. Saya said while still making a mess out of his own finger, ‘you didn’t find me, I found you.’ Mubaek went crazier and flipped Saya onto his back. Mubaek increased the strength of his thrusts and drilled deeper than possible into Saya’s body. Mubaek hissed and growled next to Saya’s ears as the younger man continued his show with his other fingers. Just as Mubaek was closed to his peak, Saya took his three slobbered, wet, and sticky fingers, and he shoved them into his own hole. Mubaek quivered at the sight. Saya yelped at the intrusion, and began to fuck himself on both his fingers and Mubaek’s cock. He continuously chanted, ‘not enough, fuck me harder, not enough, more, I want more, yes, more I want more.’ He continued the delicious chants in front of Mubaek’s eyes and the man began to completely drowned himself in the sinful being of Saya. He tried to accommodate by gnawing at Saya’s throat, twisting his nipples, gripping his dick, nothing seemed to get Saya to the edge until Mubaek received a stroke of genius. He grabbed Saya’s left leg and heaved it up over his shoulders, the new angle allowed Mubaek to drill deeper into Saya’s body and for his efforts, Mubaek earned a draw out, lengthen mewl from Saya. Mubaek fastened his pace causing the younger male went insane. Saya screamed shrilly, he convulsed and shook and trembled in the embrace of Mubaek as Mubaek continuously assaulted the pleasure point deep within Saya’s body; soon enough, Saya’s cock spitted a rope of cum up into the air which landed on both Saya’s chest and chin, but it also hit Mubaek’s pecs, leaving trails of white contrasted with the tan skin. Saya stared dazedly at the sight on top of him. While Saya had released his essence onto himself and Mubaek, with a deep grunt, Mubaek let his seed coated the insides of Saya. So much so that some spilled out lewdly onto the white sheets of his bed.

However, even though they were both spent. Saya continued to shove his fingers inside, Mubaek asked him why as he laid next to him, and Saya replied, ‘I want to keep your cum in there.’ Mubaek was flustered. This night set off a month or two of Saya looking for Mubaek and spending his nights with him.

Within a short time of them fucking, Mubaek soon realized that despite Saya wanting to play rough, the younger male actually wanted soft touches and be spoilt. And without much aversion or difficulty, sex between them softened and Saya learned to grasp at Mubaek instead of pillows when he was hitting his climaxes. Mubaek was very pleased with the way Saya was depending on him to get his pleasures, but he was more pleased with the fact that when Saya was asleep, he would turned and cuddled up to him for warmth like a little kitten.

It must have been because Saya was desperate for affection and attention that he soon forget why he went to Mubaek in the first place. Saya spent his night being fucked by Mubaek and being loved by him. It wasn’t the same as what Tagon gave him, but Saya soon realized that he much prefer Mubaek’s way of being with him. This revelation caused Saya to slowly divert away from Tagon. He became more elusive, dodging his father, giving short replies at Tagon’s questions, and always was the first to leave if they were both alone.

For the first time in a long while, Saya was being focused on, so maybe that was why he was a bit reckless. Saya disregarded the kind of danger that Tagon posed and attempted to being intimate with Mubaek in the daylight. At a point in time when Mubaek came to Tagon’s quarters to discuss the safety of Arthdal, Saya made sure to hung around and caught his eyes. Mubaek was flustered and became unable to continue with the meeting. The next few times that Saya came across Mubaek in the street, he made sure to secretly rub Mubaek’s biceps in a manner similar to how he would touch him during their nights together. And when Mubaek realized Saya was Tagon’s son, he was slightly hesitant to continue his relationship with Saya, but Saya progressed. He made sure to let Mubaek knows that Tagon was not interested in him or what he did with his day, much less who he was fucking. Which was true, it had been days and weeks since he last have a proper conversation with Tagon, and Saya couldn’t remember one time when Tagon express disgruntlement at not being able to see Saya.

Saya continued to give Mubaek short touches and short, seductive glances whenever they were in close proximity with each other. Mubaek, like a youngster in love, was keening at the attention of such beauty and was on cloud nine. They both became irresponsible in their day to day life and in their showcase of affection towards each other.

On the other hand, Tagon was slowly losing his temper.

Something was driving Saya away from him. It had been months, months, since Tagon last saw Saya. Every time Tagon came to visit his baby, Saya always had something he had to do. It was understandable the first few times, but till this point, it was too unbearable. Despite how Saya never showed his face to Tagon anymore, every time Tagon had a meeting with his underlings, Saya made his presence known. It was insufferable.

Tagon had wondered if he had done anything to cause Saya to stay away from him and what he remembered made him cringed. He was rough, and he wasn’t delicate when he was last talking to his baby. However, Tagon did not see anything wrong. He had always had Saya. Even when he said mean things to him, he had him. He had Saya’s unwavering attention and affection. Every time he came home, Saya would be greeting him with a bright grin and thrilled expression. Tagon was always the one person that Saya would not hesitate to spend all of his time with. And more importantly, Tagon was the only one that can ever satisfy Saya. This much he was certain. He was sure there wasn’t one person in Arthdal who could ever take Saya away from him. No one could ever be compared to him.

Then Tagon came across Mubaek and Saya. Numerous times. Things between the two had escalated. From simple glances to quick touches, to draw out gazes and lascivious smiles at each other. Tagon was not stupid and he could not believed Saya and Mubaek would treat him as such. Tagon knew what was going on. Saya had found someone to replace him. To touch him and to fuck him. Saya was indirectly saying that he had no need for Tagon in his life anymore. Tagon was convinced it would not go on for so long and resigned to just wait for Saya to come crawling back to him as usual.

However, it would seem that what he thought was not the case. The sign of things had changed between him and Saya had come when he saw them at noon in one of the darker corners of his building. Tagon’s vision distorted at what he saw. With their arms around each other, they looked like lovers. Hiding from sight and sunlight by being intimate in a darkened corridor. Mubaek had Saya’s legs wrapped around him, giving Saya a deep kiss as he slowly fucked him. Based on the quiet moans and noises Saya made, Tagon was sure he was enjoying it immensely.

Tagon felt lightheaded, he had never thought, or never come to terms with the fact that Saya would ever reveal those beautiful sides of him to anyone else. But here Saya was, his beautiful son, letting himself be fucked mindlessly, face a picture of pure ecstasy; with Mubaek as the one who currently enjoyed delivering the pleasure to him.

Within his mind, Tagon’s rage screamed in agony about how it should’ve been him in that position. He was supposed to be the one that had his arms around Saya’s hips, the one that possessed Saya’s unconditioned attention and love. The one person in the entirety of the world who could ever see the different aspects of Saya’s body. Not Mubaek. Not that fucker who had been plotting behind his back. That fucker could never satisfy his baby. Tagon was angry. He was angry and jealous and hurt. And no one hurt Tagon.

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Saya was startled when he saw his father in his room. It was nighttime and Saya was preparing to go to Mubaek’s quarters. He hadn’t come across Tagon all week, he completely forgot about his and Tagon’s little relationship. So Saya greeted his father happily, silently wishing Tagon would say whatever he needed to say and then leave. Tagon gave Saya an animalistic grin, ‘you’ve been avoiding me.’ Saya was taken aback. ‘What do you mean? I haven’t.’ Saya then moved over to his mirror and began to sort out his hair. ‘I thought you were busy, you’re the one that haven’t come to visit me. I mean. I am your son after all, such neglect coming from you, father.’ Saya mused playfully, with his new relationship with Mubaek, Saya slipped back into the platonic father and son relationship that he used to share with Tagon almost unknowingly, unaware of Tagon’s brewing rage. After all Saya was still young and quite naive, his mind changing rapidly. However, unlike Saya, Tagon knew what was happening and was aware of his surroundings. His Saya was trying to redirect their connection back to how it used to be. Back to when Tagon could only palm himself discreetly to the memories of Saya in his head. Back to when they had only a distant relationship.

‘Father, are you alright? You seem distraught.’

Tagon grinned.

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#arthdal chronicles #arthdal chronicles fanfic #manxboy #saya #tagon #mubaek #yaoi #free write

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chimmychanga1225 · 6 years

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It was 1 AM when I wrote this: A Spideypool Fanfic

Chapter 1 (?)

So this is one of my first fanfics on this site, so sorry if it’s not the best, but, regardless, I hope you enjoy. (Btw I’m not really sure if tumblr is a site for posting fanfics, but I guess we’ll see.) (also, I swear this isn’t how I usually write, but writing Deadpool into a fic is like welcoming the demolition of the fourth wall, so, yeah)

Warnings: Major fluff, some vulgar language, and some serious keyboard hijacking

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It was just your average bright cloudy day at the morgue when Peter started seeing dead people. Now you may ask yourself, is this man being portrayed by Bruce Willis, but, rest assured, this coroner was much more less bald than our DC universe older than middle aged sex fantasy, but we’ll get to that later.

No, Peter was probably one of the most brilliant minds in his field, if the field also included the requirement of building a scaled model version of the Death Star. And also a semi-decent Chewbacca impression. Geekdom aside, the guy was average, so he definitely probably didn’t deserve a red and white striped 1978 station wagon driving through the walls of his morgue.

As the dust cleared, the light revealed a half demolished wind shield with a few corpses chilling around the messed up room. The windshield wipers turned on for a moment to push away a dismembered shoulder, allowing Peter to have a better look at the driver.

Peter didn’t even have a moment to process what happened or who he had see when the originally dead man behind him jumped off the observation table, in his full naked glory, but still wearing his mask, somehow. “Jesus Christ”, Peter exclaimed tumbling to the ground.

“Close but not quite.”

“I don’t even need to be able to see to know you’re being stupid right now.”

“Lovely to see you too, Al. How’s the roomba working out for ya?”

“Are you always this much of a dick when you revive”, the lady responded. As Wade was about to respond, the previously forgotten coroner returned to their attention.

“Y-you’re supposed to be n-not alive”, Peter stuttered, making eye contact with the butt naked but ever sexy Wade W. Wilson.

“And who might you be”, Wade asked crouching down to the other man’s cowered form. “White jacket. Really awkward looking? You must be a coroner”, he said in a snobbish voice.

Peter felt himself finally come over the shock of the car crash and now finds himself having to deal with shock and trauma from the terrible movie reference. “Did you just quote Drac-“, Wade placed his hand over the other’s mouth.

“Wrong, fanfic sweet cheeks. But anyways, I gotta skiddadle”, and with that, the man, the myth, the legend merrily skipped his way to the semi-thrashed vehicle. Once reaching the driver’s side he leaned down to the barely visible woman who had been driving earlier. “Alright, short stack Sally, hand them over.”

With some grumbling and quiet curses, Blind Al digged out a wooden door stop and a metal rod along with a pair of... crocs? “Remind me to dip my hands in windex when I get home”, Al announced with disdain.

“Oh please, you know you love the after masturbation scent to them”, Wade coyly replied back. He walked over to the passenger side and opened - picked the lock to - the door. “Petal to the metal, Al. Let’s go!”

The car pulled out as quickly as it came in, showing all the damage the uncertified driver had made to the city. Even while assessing the damage, Peter couldn’t keep the man off his mind.

“Does he not want his liver back”, he asked himself mystified by how the walking talking crisis didn’t even notice.

—————

“Uugh”, Wade whined as he collapsed on his mysteriously stained couch. He looked over to the kitchen, disappointed to see the Blind Al didn’t have a reaction to his current crisis.

“UUUgh”, he complained slightly louder in hopes of getting her attention but still nothing.

“UUUUUuuuuuUuuuUuuuuUUUggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh”, he practically yelled.

“I’m not a dog, so why don’t you call me over instead of making some stupid ass whine”, Al said, already exhausted by the thought of the following conversation.

“You know, Al, I thought we had a real connection through that Craigslist Ad but, in all honesty, I’m feeling a little attacked right now.” Al gave a sigh of exasperation before making her way towards the overgrown child in red spandex.

“What’s wrong”, she asked, regretting the fact that his name was on the lease for their apartment.

“I can’t stop thinking about the bubble butt coroner from earlier. I left him my number but he hasn’t even texted me yet”, Wade whined looking at his heavily Hello Kitty decorated iPhone. Still nothing.

“When did you get the chance to give him your number?”

“I scratched it into my liver before I left”, Wade said casually picking at his finger nails.

“Maybe he didn’t notice.”

Wade’s persona did a complete 180, as he dropped his phone and threw off his crocs. He jumped to his suit, which was still riddled with holes and slashes from his last fight, and ran to his room. He exited an unrealistic minute later and grabbed his ammo bag.

“Don’t tell me your going to go kill him. He seemed okay”, Al said without much conviction.

“Not today, negative nelly. No, I’m going to go to him, with my unalderated feelings, raw and true, and ask him, sincerely, if he’d let me put it in his-“, Al put up a hand to stop him.

“I don’t need or want to know. Go do whatever and try not to die again. It’s getting annoying to pick you up all the time”.

“Okay, mom. I’ll hopefully return with bubble butt boy in hand or die a hero.”

—————

Peter’s feet dragged as he finally reached the enterance to his apartment. The day was wild from start to finish. And of course, Peter was blamed for losing a body. “Why do these things only happen to me”, he groaned placing the key into the lock.

Peter opened the door to his apartment and immediately went to the couch and collapsed, too tired to comprehend his surroundings. “This couch sucks”, Peter grumbled, making a mental note to invest in better furniture, after the million other things he has to pay off.

The couch laughed, shaking Peter slightly. “At least take me to dinner first”, the couch chuckled. Peter slowly came to, realizing that his couch was not talented enough to talk to him, or act so annoying if it did.

“I remember couches being a lot more quiet”, Peter said with a sly smile. He knew it wasn’t over between him and Bucky. Peter slid his arms around the man and hugging him tightly. “I’m sorry about before, I shouldn’t have gotten so upset. And I didn’t mean to ignore you either, it’s just that you’re always out with other people and I get worried.”

“Um”, the other began but Peter interrupted him. “Please let me get this out. I can barely manage to say it now”, Peter said, neck and cheeks burning. He was glad the other couldn’t see his face or else this would be even more embarrassing.

Peter took the man’s silence as a yes to his request. “I’m sorry for being so jealous and petty. I get now that you and Steve are just good friends and I’ll give you space if you need it. Just please don’t leave me”, Peter finished, giving the other a tighter hug at the end of it all.

“I love you too much to lose you”, Peter capped it all off. “I’ll prove it.”

The moment Peter was about to go down on him, Wade figured it was best to stop the kid before he did anything reckless. “Slow down there, hot shot. Didn’t you hear me earlier? Dinner first then the hanky panky. Or during dinner. Or pregame the dinner. I’m fine with either.”

“You”, was all Peter could exclaim, scrambling off the leather clad and unbelievably sexy hero mercenary.

“Me”, Wade said cheerfully, but, in reality, felt a lot of disappointment. Jokes aside, he really liked Bubble Butt boy. So much that he even broke into his apartment, like the suave heartbreaker he is. “I see that you’re kind of busy, so I guess I’ll be going now.”

Peter remained unmoving from his position in the couch, even as Wade began to get up. But just as soon as he left the couch, Peter reached out to grab Wade’s hand. “Stay... please.”

As much of a cold hearted killer that he was, Wade just couldn’t find it in him to say no to the boy sitting in front of him, trying his best not to cry. “Um, okay”, Wade said, miraculously not being annoying.

Wade sat back down, letting the other curl into his side. Peter let out shuddering breaths but refused to let out any tears. “Sooo.... exboyfriend problems?”

Peter laughed lightly. “You don’t even know the half of it.”

Wade frowned once more before putting on an award winning smile. “Well I know half of it can be resolved with some of Grandma Al’s macaroni cheese, going light on the cocaine, of course.”

“Cocaine? Damn your grandma was wild.”

“Oh she’s not my grandma. She’s my roomie. She is old, blind, and I’m pretty sure she is secretly in love with me.” Wade started digging through Peter’s pantry looking for anything pot like cooking thing to make the cheese heaven. “Grandma Wilson, on the other hand, was more of marijuana-macaroni type of gal. Oh Satan bless her soul, since she probably burning in hell with the rest of the Wilsons.”

Wade felt himself smile when he heard the other stifling laughs behind him. He was probably gonna get cursed by the bat shit crazy ghost of his long lost Grandma, but it was fine with him, if he got the bubble butt boy to laugh even for a moment. Speaking of bubble butt boy...

“Bubble Butt Boy, as much as I love alliteration, I need your real name to start working on our shipname.”

Peter blushed at the nickname, becoming a little more conscious of his butt than he was before. “I-I’m Peter. No, uh, Parker. Peter Parker. Like, together.”

“Of course you have an alliterating name, Jesus Christ, Stan, no one actually has names like this”, Wade yelled at the ceiling, confusing Peter further. When Wade faced the kid again, he gave him a toothy grin, which translated well through his mask. “‘Name’s Wade W. Wilson. Mercenary and certified love expert at your service.”

“Nice to meet you, mercenary and love expert Wade W. Wilson”, Peter said with a cheeky smile.

“Emphasis on the love expert. Now who’s the boy toy?”

Peter gave a sad sigh as he stood up from his spot on the couch. He glided over to Wade and gave him a small tap on the shoulder to get his attention. “The Kraft Mac and Cheese box is over here. Unfortunately, I’m fresh out of cocaine”.

There was a small pause before the younger continued. “And he wasn’t really my boy toy, but I was his.”

Wade had to bite his lips to stop himself from making a sarcastic comment and just listen. “His name is Bucky and he’s actually a really nice guy. It was kind of my fault we broke up. I mean, he was always really lax and let me do what I wanted, but I felt like he didn’t really care what I did. And when I started getting worried about him or jealous over the amount of time he was hanging out with his friends, he would always get mad.“

“I- at one point I thought he was cheating on me so I followed him out. Before he even got past a block I was caught by him and he hadn’t talk to me or even seen me since.” Peter was crying now, regretting who’s he acted and how jealous he was of Bucky’s and Steve’s relationship. “I j-just want t-to say I’m s-sorry”, he barely pushed the words through his lips before his crying took over him.

Wade walked over, Macaroni made in a nice Adventure time themed cup (which he totally wanted to steal) and led the crying boy back to the couch. “Don’t you worry your little bubble butt over him, Parker. He doesn’t deserve you affection and you don’t deserve all the stuff he put you through. And that’s my verdict.”

“But-“

“Sorry, baby boy, but it can’t be changed. Love expert, remember?” Peter laughed and rolled his eyes, which were still a little red, but mostly tear-less.

“You know, I don’t think I have ever met a love expert that was so modest”, Peter said gesturing to the Wade’s apparel. I don’t think I even got a chance to see your face...”, Peter trailed off, raising his hand toward the mask.

Just as his hand slipped under it a bit - allowing him to feel the damaged skin - Wade jerked back so much he fell off the couch. “I know I’ve made you dinner, but, Peter, you have to be delicate with me”, Wade said jokingly, but his heart was pounding and he was sweating under all the leather.

“I have to protect my innocence”, Wade said continuing with the joke, but eventually stood up from the ground and grabbed a blanket over on the other side of the room. He came back to Peter and put the blanket on him but made no move to sit back down. “I’ll check in on you later, Parker. So don’t do anything stupid”, Wade lectured and just like that he hopped out Peter’s window.

“What the fuck”, Peter exclaimed running over to the ledge, but it was too dark to see the ground. He only heard a quiet “watch your language young man” before he headed back to the couch smiling broader than ever.

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