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#may even start sooner
angelpuns · 4 months
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I know everyone voted for L330-N Au next but I'm gonna sketch out the first few pages of that and Rural Au and just work on whichever one feels better cause tbh I'm getting a little burnt out on Kid Leo and if one of those feels better imma work on those next :/ may even start on them sooner and take a break from KL after this intermission cause this arc is just so big :(
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Heyooo! I spent the last year creating an incredibly self indulgent Ronadora Pinup calendar!
❤💜Pre0rder here!! ❤💜
I'm putting them up for preorder from today (12/06/23) to 12/16/23! Orders are to United States only, for now. This is my first time selling, so plz be kind ;w;
(And shoutout to @biscuitgeekery for the awesome product photos!)
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amugoffandoms · 6 months
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mugram progress report!!! prisoners' birthday art: 10% "album art": 40% vd cover art (just characters in the vd): 40% writing (vds/mvs): 100% thumbnails: 100% character info cards: 100% interrogation cards: 100% mechanics: sending in interrogation questions: complete (through google forms or ask box) voting: undecided (need to decide if a week or a month is good, month allows more time but will have to make a new poll every week [but will have a separate google form])
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hopelesshawks · 8 months
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Nothing like reading a fic on ao3 and suddenly getting heavy sadomasochist and impact play in almost all of the smut scenes even though the smut tags were only “dom/sub”, “soft dom [insert character]”, and “sub [insert character]” to make me appreciate how well tagged/warned shit on tumblr is
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shopwitchvamp · 2 months
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February Preorder Status Update:
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katya-goncharov · 8 months
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apparently the doctor's appointment I've been dreading all week that was meant to be today has just been cancelled because of "technical difficulties" and I am fuming
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trollbreak · 7 months
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Finks abt. Dari violence. As a treat <3
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genderfluid-druid · 1 year
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Hmm.
#hmm#hmmmm#just had a conversation that i have not fully processed yet#which i am currently not feeling any emotions about which canNOT be right#there have gotta be emotions there but i WOULD believe that they are very very very very firmly suppressed#i do think my brain is kind of doing a meta world tilt shift thing right now that may not be perceptible to the mind's eye#kind of like how if the earth itself started slowing down in its rotation it might be hard to tell what the fuck was happening#you see. in the year of our lord 2016 i went through the worst shittiest most devastating breakup of my life#which left me in what we'll just call a Poor Mental State through much of 2017#and which i only finally clawed out of when i realized i had to stop exposing myself to contact with the ex by unfriending/blocking#which. very healthy choice. should've done that much sooner and i recommend it to anyone in a similar situation#anyway#the crisis dragged on for longer than it should have because ex and i were still trying to be friends when we really really should've. not#we kept driving each other crazy and i was still in love with the guy even though. HAHAHAHAHAHA SHITTY BREAKUP.#so basically my brain was in a constant state of 'i need him to care about me' butting up against 'i am terrified that he doesn't' and#of course that second one became self-fulfilling because i was annoying the shit out of him#crisis finally hit an inflection point when i got it through my head that i just had to accept that i might never be friends with him#that i was gonna have to stop talking to him and let it go#and for the rest of my life assume friendship was not a viable option#and that is how i lived for six years#and he moved to Colorado and got married#and i tried to date some people and hooked up with some others#and that brings us to today#when someone walked up to me at a wedding and said 'oh are you drake? i'm M's friend! didn't you two like date or something?'#🙃#okay TO BE CONTINUED bc apparently there's a tag limit did you know that? I've never hit 30 tags before. ok one sec
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gophergal · 7 months
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Shout-out to my buddy J, you've created a monster girliepop
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ryuki-blogs · 10 months
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I's still insane to me that in the US people finish college at 21 - 22. Absolutely bonkers.
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oh-my-wizard-god · 11 months
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/
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sh1-n0bu · 7 months
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♡︎ 𝙗𝙖𝙗𝙮 𝙢𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙖 ♡︎
characters: priest!sub!blade x demon lord!nb!dom!reader
warnings: breeding, creampie, eating out, fingering, squirting, monsterfucking, non-verbal ask of consent, dirty talk, feminization (like literally), lactating, nipple stimulation, overstimulation, dacryphilia, size kink, belly bulge, cervix kissing, blade is a demon hunting priest, reader is a demon lord so they can choose whether to have a cock or pussy so basically genderfluid reader???? also reader changes blade’s anatomy to have a pussy and womb — it’s so messy okay😭😭
word count: 4.4K
notes: you KNOW shit is getting real when nobu starts word count. never thought i would be writing a bit of a dark-ish content yet here we are. the power of the horny😔 also inspired by my chat with one of ririshizu’s bots
special thank you to @theblades and @yenaakwyl for proofreading a whole damn 14 pages of filth
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being a priest is no laughing matter. especially when you’re the type of priest that hunts and gets rid of demons who somehow ended up with a demon lord clinging to you, who’s constantly at your side, asking you questions about the human realm.
what was up with you, anyways? a literal demon lord, one of the lords of a deadly sin and yet here you were, dragging him around the streets, pointing at random things, wanting to sample every street food there were. sure, your human form was incredibly deceiving. a short, sweet human, clinging to his arm, excitedly pointing at the many different things that caught your attention. it would be hard for anyone to think of you as a demon lord in disguise.
except for blade. he’s been in this field of work for such a long time. constantly vanquishing demons who either were too annoying or possessed a poor, curious soul. the sharp edge of his shard sword is no laughing matter.
but you didn’t seem to mind. this demon lord, acting like a curious puppy, pulling him to each sides of the streets — ignoring the loud angry shouts of the car drivers and the constantly thinning of his wallet of course. not that blade had much to worry when it came to financial freedom. putting his life on the line and vanquishing demons from the human realm pays a generous amount.
it felt wrong to allow you to cling to him. you, a demon lord, no matter what your disguises meant or whatever pathetic excuse you came up with of wanting to sample human food. he should have gotten rid of you sooner yet no matter how much his hands twitch to unsheathe his shard sword, he just can’t seem to do it. no matter what his threats may seem or be heard of, the priest just can’t bring himself to harm you. if anything, he finds himself doing the absolute opposite, to his blatant horror.
“wait, no, don’t do that. the water just boiled so it’s hot, it could burn your tongue”
“you do realize that ice isn’t meant to be eaten, right? no, i don’t care how much of a pretty shape it’s in or if it still has the aftertaste of the coffee”
“if you eat too much raw red pepper, you could have a heart stroke. 14 is enough on one sitting. give it here”
yes, you get the point. a priest vanquishing demon, living together with a demon lord and even protecting them. hypocritical, right?
one night, as you two were cuddling on the couch and absentmindedly watching cliche horror movies that has demons with red skin and horns and a tail, that reminded something to blade. demons have unique demon forms depending on their sins and ‘birth’. but you never once showed an ounce of your demon form. not even a single slip-up.
“hmm? why do you ask? curious?” you hum softly, taking another fistful of the popcorn in the bowl. not that blade minded. if anything, he unconsciously pushed the bowl of popcorn closer to you.
“i guess so. you never even spoke of your demon form whether it has a tail or not” the priest mumbles, his husky voice turning softer just for a moment. or maybe he was just sleepy, judging by his dark eye-bags and little yawns.
oh right, you never did. but then again, blade never asked of your demon form before so, it’s to be expected after all.
just as blade had shrugged off your silence and turned his attention back to the tv, he felt something slithering around his waist. swallowing the sudden lump in his throat, he briefly looks down at what was wrapping around his waist. there, snug around his hips was a long, pale white, scaled, snake-like tail. it seemed incredibly long, judging by how it easily wrapped around his hips few times and the rest was just dangling off of the side of the couch.
was this…?
he could feel his hand twitch. itching, something under his skin itching of wanting to reach down and run his hand over the smooth looking scales of the tail.
pat! pat pat!
before blade could even make sense of what the fuck he just did, his hand had unconsciously unraveled from it’s former crossed position. one hand going down, flattening his palm over the smooth, large tail before giving it a few pats. at the same time, he could hear another low pat pat! sounds coming from the side of the couch. must be your tail ends flicking and hitting against the couch, he deducted.
briefly, blade steals a glance at your face. still watching the movie on the TV, seemingly paying no mind to the feeling of his human hand resting over your tail. it was oddly warm to the touch. from the look of it resembling a snake like tail, he expected it to be cold.
slowly, he runs his hand over the scales. soft, smooth and easily gliding over them as if it was nothing. sure, some bumps are felt on the palm of his hand but other than the occasional little ridges, it was completely smooth. how… soothing.
blade doesn’t know how or when but over the course of time you spent at his apartment, these little moments of playing with your tail had become a normal occurrence. little moments of “affection” if you will. fridays had become the weekly movie nights. blade would put on some random horror movie that you chose to be the most interesting based on the summary of the movie. half an hour or so into the movie and blade would feel the familiar scales of your tail wrap around his hips.
the priest would sometimes toy with your tail in hopes of getting you to show your true color of being a demon lord. to make you angry. to make you snap and finally show your true colors. if anything, it had the complete opposite effect as your tail only tightened around him. low, deep rumbling sounds akin to a purr coming from the depths of your chest.
briefly, the priest would catch himself wondering how it would feel to lay his head on your chest as you purr. cats have de-stressing and soothing qualities to their purrs. would demons be the same? sometimes, he would even catch himself thinking of… sacrilegious things. like how your tail would feel wrapped around his legs, opening him up for you. how your form could shapeshift and could have a human male’s anatomy. would you purposefully make it big? would you force it past his twitching rim, uncaring of his whines and pleads to wait?
ah, but that sounded so unlike you. despite being a demon lord, you have been nothing but calm and peaceful with blade. soft hums, nods of agreement, always needing his help and inquiring him of his thoughts on something.
then, would you coax him? whispering soft reassurances in the shell of his ear as you softly push your cock inch by inch inside him. a large, clawed, inhuman hand running over his stomach, talking about all sorts of things, promising to breed him full of your seeds as he cries. opening his legs wide with your tail wrapped around his thighs, wiping away his tears as he cries so prettily?
“f-fuck…” unknowingly, blade found himself with a little problem. another movie night, another time spent together ‘cuddling’. yet due to his own thoughts, blade finds himself embarrassingly hard. shit, he needed to find a way to leave the room and take care of his problem. but your tail way starting to curl around him in loops, just like how a snake would wrap itself around it’s prey.
did you know? know of his raging hard on and was just teasing him now? no. taking a brief glance at your face caused blade to come to a conclusion that you didn’t know. yet. that was the biggest part. or maybe you did considering just how your tail was moving around his waist. slipping under the hem of his shirt, slipping up, curling around his body under his shirt. scale coming in contact with skin. blade almost let out a moan at the feeling if it weren’t for him biting down on his lips.
“[n-name], get your tail off. i need to use the bathroom” internally cursing himself out for stuttering, blade can only hope that you would oblige. gods, just the way you let out a soft “hmm?” while playing innocent, smiling at him and blinking like nothing happened while your tail curls around his skin.
fuck, he was done for. you knew. you fucking knew.
“are you sure? your body seems to react positively from the amount of human interaction that i’ve had until now, blade” the end of your tail circles around his peck. slowly trailing the end as if you were going to squeeze—
“n-ngaah?!” a surprised noise comes from the priest’s mouth before he clenches his jaws shut, brows furrowing together as he tries to ignore the feeling on his chest. soft and slow circles. the end of your tail was wrapped around his nipple, pulling and rolling it between as if it was nothing. shit, when did his chest get so sensitive?
“oh that was a cute sound. do it again” you hum, turning away from the TV and looking at him now. curse you for looking so damn interested and curious as your tail fondles his nubs. blade can feel his pants starting to form a wet patch as his breathing becomes more labored.
“t-take… your goddamn tail off. i swear, i’ll ghh—! chop it into pieces…!” despite his best efforts, his words had no bite. just weak mumblings of a pathetic excuse of a priest being turned on as a literal demon lord tugs at his nipple. he was even starting to quietly whine in place as he tries to swallow down his moans.
“say, blade. i read from somewhere that human chest can lactate when stimulated enough. can you lactate?” blade almost shrieked at your words. lactating? him? while it was true that human women can lactate if they gave birth, he was unsure about men being able to lactate.
“n-no! can’t! i’m a man, it’s impossible for my chest to produce mi—ungh!” his words die quickly in his throat when your tail clenched around his nipple tightly. pulling on it, familiar to a pinching motion. since when did his body get so sensitive like this? or was this all your doing? did you secretly put a spell on him to make him sensitive?
“stop..! [n-name] stop ooungh! please, stop! i’m telling you, i’m a man. i can’t lactate like a woman!” his pleads fall on deaf ears as you slip his shirt off over his head. instead this time, using your hands to knead and fondle his pecks. squeezing, rolling his sensitive nubs between your fingers, even tugging on them. it all got blade letting out uncharacteristic high pitched noises like a cat in heat.
“p-please… stop this, [name]..” blade trails off, red in the face, shame, embarrassment and arousal swirling in his stomach like a hot bubbling lava as he admits defeat and whines helplessly.
“then wriggle yourself out of my tail. it’s loose around you, bladie” you briefly retort as you suckle on his nipple. mouth latched to his chest, biting and planting wet kisses all around his soft pink areola. as weak as his whimpers and pathetic his begging were, he really wasn’t making a single attempt to pull back. you have given him enough chances even now as your tail stays loose around him. yet he still tries to act like he hates it.
switching between giving attention to his two nipples with blade not even thinking of pulling himself out of your tail, the movie plays in the background, long forgotten. you were determined to make this weird human of yours lactate. you can make him!
it didn’t took much longer until blade let out a yelp as a warm liquid drops in your mouth. the taste oddly sweet and a bit thick in texture. realizing that his chest was feeling much more heavier and nipples felt more wetter than before, the priest’s eyes widen in horror and arousal. did you really managed to stimulate him enough to make him lactate?
“oh? so, i was right! humans can lactate regardless of their gender” you let out a soft giggle, internally cheering as a bright smile comes across your face. the sheer amount of exuberance you showed in his lactation had caused blade to feebly attempt to cover his chest.
“don’t! don’t look… it’s embarrassing…” the man whines, shaking hands covering up his leaking nubs. but that proves to be futile as his hands covering his chest had caused him to twitch. everything felt so much and so little at the same time. his poor cock was neglected and weeping, staining his pants as you stimulate his nipples as he whines.
this wasn’t supposed to happen! he wasn’t supposed to be this sensitive to your touches.
but the leaking of his milk had seemed to cause something to stir in your chest. an odd sense of possessiveness and need to claim him growing in your heart, tugging at it. laying your palm flat against his stomach, you rub slow circles onto it. somehow, it had helped to lessen blade’s embarrassment.
“bladie, how would you feel if i were to make you my baby momma?” your voice cuts him out of the trance like state he was in. blinking his eyes a few times with a weak “huh?” as if he hadn’t heard you. with a quiet chuckle, you ask again. repeating the question to him slowly in case he was too pleasure driven.
baby momma? but that’s something that people refer to when women get pregnant right? were you referring to making him pregnant? but that was impossible! he was a man and men had different anatomy compared to women’s!
“i can use a few spells. you would have a female anatomy. but only if you wish to be my baby momma. i would take good care of you and the kids, we’d be together as a cute family. don’t you think we’d be a cute family, blade?” he could briefly hear you hum. but the rest of your words flew over his head since the female anatomy part.
a female anatomy. blade would have a pussy, a womb, cervix the perfect anatomy to get pregnant. he would be a cute baby momma. your baby momma. and he would carry your kids. a child who was half you and half him, a cute bundle of sunshine.
“please… please do. make me your baby momma. i wanna be your b-baby momma..!” blade nods frantically, not even bothering to think over the consequences too deeply. but the prospect of having your kids, of having you inside him got blade rubbing his thighs together, head spinning with all sorts of thoughts as his breathing becomes labored. you said you would take good care of him and the kids! he’ll be in good hands.
although a part of his brain was screaming at him, telling him to withdraw from the touch of your palm running over his stomach, changing his insides, blade could only sit there dumbly. a baby. a cute baby that you two made together. it would be so sweet, so cute. blade couldn’t wait any longer as he silences the logical part of his brain. all he wanted was you now. just you and nothing else.
the process didn’t take long. a few strokes of your hand and soothing whispers to his ear and it was done. or at least, from what you said. and oh fuck, was it true. when you tugged his pants and boxers off, what greeted both of your eyes was a slick pussy, dripping with arousal. seeing how you had successfully changed him, the priest lets out a weak whine, closing his legs to hide himself.
you didn’t seem to like that. clicking your teeth as your tail wraps around his leg, pulling his legs apart and allowing your hungry eyes to feast on his dripping cunt. blade couldn’t help his whine as the feeling of being so empty took place in his head. or was it inside his womb that he felt so empty?
“so sweet. you would look so cute with my cum dripping out of you” you mutter, running a finger up his wet pussy. the action got his hips twitching, trying to make you push your finger inside himself. tutting softly, reminding him to be patient, you slowly ease a finger in. oh gods, the stretch felt so good. so full and filled already despite it being just a single finger that was now slowly massaging his plush walls.
the soft whines and gasps coming out of blade turns into a moan as he throws his head back on the couch. long, navy hair spreading over the mattress as your fingers scissor him open. you would have expected him to be more… reclusive considering his usual act. perhaps you were wrong. the way that blade was throwing his head back, moaning without shame as his warm walls suck your fingers in greedily caused you to almost mistaken him for a virgin. or maybe he was just touch starved. poor thing.
cooing words of how he was doing good, how his gushy cunt was sucking in your fingers so prettily, you lean down to pepper kisses on his clit. long, forked tongue coming out momentarily to slip inside him with your fingers, constantly flicking his clit. the action caused to have made him oversensitive. strong, scarred thighs coming up to wrap around your head, a hand fisting at your locks as loud, pathetic whines of “c-can’t! feelss sho weird! [n-name], can’t—gyuuck! aanh aah♡︎!!” trails off into a high pitched whines as his hips jerk. legs clamping around your head in a vice grip, fisting at your locks tightly as his back arches off of the couch so prettily as he squirts in your mouth. ah right, in your own haze, you’ve forgotten and accidentally pushed your tongue in too far, hitting his g-spot.
well, that was fine. the cold priest sounded so cute and tasted delicious as he twitches under you. it would be fine to fuck him open with your tongue and prepare him thoroughly.
blade doesn’t know what to think anymore. was he even able to think? all he could do was to moan and shriek, trashing about on the bed as something deep and long slithers inside him. his cunt was being fucked open, wet sounds coming out as he gushes all over your mouth, tongue and chin. fluids dribbling down to your chin as you continue to force his legs open with your tail, arms wrapped around his waist and pulling him back into your mouth and fingers.
by the time you thought of him as prepped enough and pull your tongue and fingers out, blade could only weakly whine at the feeling of something pulling out of his warm insides. legs shaking, face flushed as dried tear stains cover his cheeks. his pretty red eyes looked so hazy, mind filled with cotton and statics. you haven’t even gotten to the main part yet!
blade feels something wrap around him. something bigger, warmer and gentle. clawed hands wrapping around his slender waist, pulling him against a massive frame. was this… was he on your real form right now?
tilting his head back to look at you, his hunch proves to be correct. no longer were you in your small human disguise. large, pale white figure with horns, tail and claw holding him in a safe cocoon in it’s embrace. despite having deep hatred against your kin, the priest couldn’t bring himself to hate you. instead, he oddly found your real form beautiful.
“huh…?” his thought gets cut off short when he feels something poke at his entrance. looking down, a sharp gasp escapes him. by the gods were you huge. girthy and long, thick with need and ready to fill him to the brim with your seeds. blade wasn’t sure if he could take such a large thing inside himself as he instinctively shut his legs close.
almost as if sensing his inner worries, you place a hand over his stomach, other hand spreading his legs wider to make it easier for you to slip in.
“don’t worry, pet. i’ll make sure it fits” your deeper, almost inhuman voice hums right beside his ear, sending shivers down his spine. although your words were soothing, the large tip of your cock pushing past his walls, opening his cunt wider was definitely not comforting. fuck, just the tip inside and blade was already thrashing about, shaking his head and stuttering out how he can’t fit it inside him.
“w-wait! w-won’t hhgh fit! ish too big! too bigtoobigtoobig—! m-my lo—oough! aanh! ish t-too fu-uck! big♡︎♡︎” the human squeals, cries, sobs and moans. loud lecherous noises coming from both his mouth and cunt. wet noises flooding the room alongside the low grunts and deep growls. you sounded inhumane, you felt inhumane but blade loved it all the more. the priest loved being spread open by your large cock, pushing past his hole, feeling his plushy walls and insides. ah, he could die happily filled to the brim like this.
finally, after long minutes of slowly easing yourself inside, you managed to fit your cock inside him. snug to the brim, tip kissing his cervix and making blade squeal. legs shaking and twitching, he came on your cock again at the feeling of your tip kissing his cervix. he saw that you were big but not this big! gods, he felt so damn full.
“so pretty, my mate. so full of me and i haven’t even fucked you properly yet” you grunt, deep, inhumane voice breathing by his ear and making him shake and twitch in your grasp like a sweet fawn. blade wouldn’t mind being a sacrificial lamb to you.
through tear stained eyes and blurry vision, he could make out the faint outline of your cock in his stomach. you were too big to the point your were causing a bulge inside him by just slipping your cock inside. how full would he feel after you have properly made him a baby momma? cunt weeping out a mixture of your cum, belly bulging so cutely. just the imagination of such action made blade buck his hips weakly. too fucked out to even utter a word.
feeling the pathetic excuse of movement of your cock, you let out a low laugh. tail wrapped around one of his legs, the other held open by your hand as you finally bounce him on your cock. slowly, slipping yourself in and out and yet the priest in your hand was sobbing as he blabbers deliriously about being fucked dumb on your cock. of having your babies inside his own womb. of being your sweet mate.
blade was a big guy. in human terms and physique wise, he was big. and yet in your lap, held open by your hands, back to your chest as he allows himself to be dumbed down on your girth made blade realize just how damn small he was compared to you. sure, he was big in human terms but compared to you, he was absolutely nothing. just a small hole for you to use. a fleshlight to be filled with your cum until you were satisfied. your baby momma to have his chest fondled and squeezed until his chest grows sore and heavy. milk leaking out it small globs from his sensitive pink nipples.
“my pet. my cute mate. my sweet other half. my adorable breeding bitch uhng… so fucking tight. so warm and tight like the cute little thing you are” blade could briefly hear you groan, heavy breaths falling on his neck, making him shiver at each breaths. making him cry and moan in a shrill voice like a girl each time your cock slid inside him. plunging deeper into parts he never knew before, grazing that one soft spot that made him shriek, tip hitting his cervix at each thrust. blade was so sure that it was bruised now. not that he minded it, the pain felt good to him.
“y-yours—! yours yours yours! your c-cute ma—aaanhg! aaanh haagh gyaaamf♡︎ y-your mate. your oouungh other half. y-your adorable♡︎ breeding bitch—!” blade’s mouth fell open in a silent scream, head throwing back to your shoulder when he felt your hand press on the bulge in his stomach. it felt good. so good that he immediately squirted on your cock again at the sheer pleasure the pressure brought.
but of course you wouldn’t stop. you would keep going, forcing his small body to bounce on your cock, occasionally tweaking his nipples, rolling his clit between your fingers. you were damn adamant on making him pregnant, breed him until you were damn sure he was knocked up.
he was yours. your human. your mate. your fated other half. your cute breeding bitch and you would be damned all over again if he ends up not getting pregnant by the time you’re done. blade was yours. no one else would ever take him away from you. no one. no one no one no one, no one else—
“AAANGH! M-MY LORD♡︎ c-cock giick! sho full…” the human shrieks and twitches in your grasp, legs weakly thrashing around as you finally cum deep inside him. the warmth of your seed spurting inside his gummy walls, painting his insides white causing blade to cum again. blade felt so full, the skin of his stomach stretching a bit to accommodate to the great amount of cum that was inside him. it felt so warm and sticky. messy, as it dribbles down your shaft, his small human body unfit to keep it all inside himself.
“my cute mate…” you purr softly, arms wrapping around your mate as he twitches and shakes. cheeks stained with old and new tears, jaws slack with drool dribbling down with his face as red as his eyes. he was yours now. blade was your human now. the weird priest was yours and no one would ever take him away from you.
“mine” with that final declaration, you placed a soft kiss to the crown of his head. he seemed to relax at the kiss, sinking against your chest as he black out. that was fine. you’ll make sure to breed him again once he wakes up.
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luxaofhesperides · 4 months
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Soulmark AU + Sleeping Beauty ; requested by @candeartist422!
For the last few years, Duke’s been waiting for his soulmate to die.
It sounds cruel to say it that way. But the waiting is more painful, he thinks, than just mourning a lost love. It’s not like most people ever meet their soulmates anyways; his parents weren’t meant to be, but they still loved each other and had a life together. He wishes he could turn his focus away from his soulmate, but Duke is a romantic at heart and has always wanted to find the other half of his soul.
But since he was fourteen, his soulmark has dulled, fading in and out of color. What was once a vibrant blue crystal star, with eight points and a swirl of watercolor hues around it, dimmed more and more until Duke was sure he was watching his soulmate die slowly. 
His soulmate didn’t die then. Whoever they are got better, his soulmark gaining color, but it never went back to the way it was. For years after, Duke would check at the beginning and end of each day, keeping track of when it faded and when it regained its color. 
He thought his soulmate was sick. In and out of hospitals, fighting to stay alive.
And then it went nearly colorless. 
Duke doesn’t remember much about that day. He knows he woke up, brushed his teeth, the lifted up his shirt to check his soulmark in the mirror. The blue was almost completely gone, the star on his left hipbone nearly gray with how colorless it was. He started at it for a moment, shocked, and reality slid away from him as he retreated into the safety of his mind, fully dissociating. 
Bruce had found him when Duke didn’t show up for breakfast. He held him and offered quiet words of comfort that Duke couldn’t understand, but just having someone with him lessened the hurt of losing his soulmate. 
Seeing the color come back the next day, faint as it was, hurt even more.
A year later, Duke still can’t break the habit of checking his soulmark twice a day. It hasn’t changed at all, still faint and dim, but carrying just enough color to show that his soulmate was still alive. At the very least, they were still breathing, but his chance of ever meeting them is basically zero. Still, he can’t help but hope, wishing that he could meet them even once before they die and leave him forever. 
“Same as ever,” he murmurs to himself as he brushes his thumb against his soulmark. He’s terrified that he’s forgotten how beautiful the blue of it was when his soulmate was healthy. 
Duke doesn’t let himself think on it too much anymore. Though his thoughts often turn to his soulmate during quiet moments like these, the busy nature of Gotham is usually more than enough to pull his attention back to the here and now. There’s no use in obsessing over his soulmate anyways; they’re just going to die, sooner or later, and Duke knows he’ll never get to meet them. They’ll just be another empty space in his life, right next to his parents. 
“Come on, Thomas, focus,” he tells himself firmly, then gets dressed and heads down to the kitchen for breakfast.
The manor is quiet. It usually is in the mornings, with everyone from the night shift dead asleep and trying to get as much rest as they can before they have to start their day. Not that many of them stay in the manor these days; Duke and Damian are the only permanent residents at the moment, but Steph usually stays half with her mom and half in the manor during the summers when she’s home from college, and the others drop in whenever they feel like it. 
Bruce lives more in the Batcave than the manor, so he doesn’t really count. It’s also why Duke is surprised to see Bruce awake and dressed like a normal person, drinking coffee in the kitchen as if this is a normal occurrence. 
“Morning,” Duke offers.
“Good morning, Duke,” Bruce replies. “Sleep well?”
“Well enough. Alfred out or something?”
“He may have kicked me out of the Batcave to clean it up a bit,” Bruce answers tiredly. “Want me to make breakfast?”
Duke has heard the horror stories of Bruce’s attempts to make edible food in a kitchen. In the interest of not dealing with food poisoning, Duke shakes his head quickly and says, “Nah, it’s fine. I was kinda wanting to eat out for breakfast. Get out there as me, and not a mask, you know?”
“Mind if I join you? Alfred may forgive me for not sleeping if I willingly go outside.”
Duke laughs. “Sure man, as long as you pay.”
“I’ll drive, too.”
“What, don’t trust me behind a wheel?”
Bruce gives him a tired look, eyes dead and dull. “I have taught all my children how to drive. The day I willingly let them take the wheel when I am not actively dying is the day I’ve been replaced by a robot clone of myself who doesn’t know better yet.”
“That is… very specific. Is that a thing you usually worry about?”
“I’m Batman. I have to worry about everything.”
Yeah, that tracks. Duke wouldn’t be surprised if he has at least five contingency plans for that scenario, should it ever happen. “Well,” he says, “Right now, all you need to worry about is having your wallet and driving us down to The Foodie Nook. I’ve been craving their breakfast plates for ages.”
Bruce doesn’t object to his choice of restaurant and follows Duke down to the garage, grabbing a random set of keys and pointing it out to the many cars he owns. One near the front blinks its lights as it unlocks and Duke cheerfully tosses himself into the passenger seat as Bruce opens the garage door. 
The drive into Gotham is smooth. They don’t hit traffic until they reach the bridge that leads into the city proper, taking them away from the quiet of Bristol. The morning is busy, but not enough that Duke worries about being out as the Signal to help keep the peace. It’s a normal type of busy, one borne from people going about their lives, feeling safe enough to go out. 
The Foodie Nook is entirely local and very popular, so the parking lot is nearly full. But they expanded their space last year, which means he and Bruce don’t have to sit outside while they wait to grab a table. Bruce keeps conversation light and casual, well aware of the many listening ears around them, and it’s nice, feeling normal for once. 
Well, as normal as life can be with Bruce Wayne™. The server who comes to lead them to a table realizes who she’s talking to after she gets a proper look at them while holding open the door and promptly stutters over her words. 
“No need for any special treatment,” Bruce laughs lightly, “We’re just here for breakfast. Nothing special.”
“Of course,” she replies, cheeks red. “Um, right this way! We’ve got a table by the windows for you. Just two, yeah?”
“Yup! Just two. Thought this was a good day to spend some time with Duke. He’s a great kid, you know, I’m glad I was given the opportunity to foster him.”
The sunny, cheerful Bruce Wayne persona is so different from the usual Bruce he works with that it feels like he’s standing next to a stranger. But his words are sincere and warm his heart, filling up the gaps that his soulmate has left. 
“Here you are!” their server announces, showing them to their table. “I’ll be right back with some menus.” She’s gone in a rush, and other customers glance over before quickly averting their gaze. 
It’s one of the unspoken rules of Gotham: give the Waynes their privacy while they’re out in public. Questions and conversation are for public events only, but if they see a Wayne out and about during a normal day, everyone leaves them be unless spoken to first. Duke used to follow those rules as well when he was just another Gothamite. It’s strange being on the other side of that now that he’s in with the Waynes.
Duke barely has to look through the menu when it’s handed to him. The breakfast plates are his favorites and he gets one every single time he comes to The Foodie Nook; stacked full with breakfast foods from around the world. As a kid, he loved the Mexico Plate, but these days he’s craving either the Brazilian Plate or the Vietnamese Plate.  
He can’t decide on which one and thinks about tossing a coin to decide, but seeing how that’s Two Face’s whole thing, he decides to hold off and settle the matter with eenie-meenie-minnie-mo. 
He gets the Vietnamese Plate.
Bruce, on the other hand, reads through the entire menu like it’s a novel, then leans over and says rather loudly, “Duke, what’s a tort-illa.” 
The pain he feels hearing that is only worsened by the amusement in Bruce’s eyes. He’s doing it on purpose, playing up the Brucie act for the public so he can psychologically torment Duke. A few nearby customers choke back laughter, turning away to hide their smiles. 
Duke shakes his head and says, “Don’t worry about it. It’s just food. Don’t ask any more questions, I just want a peaceful breakfast.”
“Well then,” Bruce replies, “I suppose I know what to order now.”
As if she was summoned, their server reappears before them, cheeks still looking a little flushed. “Hi! Ready to order?”
She writes down their orders quickly, valiantly keeping a straight face at Bruce’s mispronunciation of tortilla, then heads off to deliver their orders to the kitchen. 
Rather than draw out a conversation with Brucie Wayne, Duke settles for playing a few idle games on his phone; his current favorite is one quiet cat cafe game where he directs cats into fulfilling cafe orders. 
Bruce, despite being out in his civilian identity, is working. He’s on his Batman phone, which looks the same as his other cell phones except this one has a bat symbol sticker just barely hiding a Superman sticker on the phone case. His brow is slightly furrowed as he reads whatever file he’s accessing from the Batcomputer. It’s a little worrying but it could be anything. Bruce makes the same expression when he reads one of Tim’s snarky comments getting quoted in the news.
But that’s not Duke’s problem! He’s here to enjoy his breakfast and it will take the end of the world itself to remove him from his seat before he’s done eating.
The game takes most of his attention until their food comes out, and by then Bruce has tucked away the smallest of his Batman mannerisms. They enjoy a normal, peaceful breakfast. Bruce ends it by asking their server if she has any debt that’s weighing her down, then giving her a tip that’s at least five thousand dollars above that. 
She does cry and Bruce hugs her. It’s very sweet. 
As soon as they get back into the car, his easy going smile drops and Duke knows some superhero nonsense is about to take over his day. 
“Duke,” Bruce starts, seriously, “I received a message from Zatanna.”
“Don’t drag this out,” Duke says, “Just give it to me straight. What terrible thing is about to happen to us?”
“It’s nothing too big. They just recently defeated a magical being who had been tearing apart secret government facilities in Illinois. He had both magic and a high tech weapon, which they confiscated and are delivering to me. The government agency he was fighting was suspiciously interested in the weapon, and based on their behaviors and newly revealed work, Zatanna made the decision to turn the weapon over to us so it doesn’t fall into the wrong hands.”
Bruce smoothly merges into traffic as he speaks, getting them onto the road back to the manor. There’s a look in his eyes that means he’s keeping a lot unsaid, and Duke knows without a doubt that whatever this government agency was doing is bad if Zatanna needs Batman to act as extra security. 
He’s not sure about her decision to trust the weapon to be safe in Gotham, either. Sure, Batman will keep it as safe as he can, but with their luck, it’ll end up in the hands of a Rogue and lead to a lot of death and destruction. 
As soon as they cross the bridge and return to Bristol, Bruce steps on the gas and the car tears down the road. Without any other cars to worry about (or traffic laws), it takes barely two minutes to reach the manor, when the gates open for them and let them into the garage. 
Alfred waits for them by the door, looking them over with a critical eye. “I see you have managed to go outside, Master Bruce. What’s the special occasion?”
“Just breakfast,” Bruce answers. “I’m heading back down to the Batcave. Zatanna will be here soon to deliver a weapon.” He’s gone before Alfred can say anything more, hurrying down the hall and turning the corner, disappearing from sight as he heads towards his office. 
“I see we have yet to break that bad habit of his. Did you enjoy your morning out, Master Duke?”
“Sure did, Alfred. I’m, uh, also going down to the Batcave. He’s definitely not telling me a lot about what’s going on, so I’m just going to read about it over his shoulder. I’ll be back up for lunch, though!”
“And perhaps you’ll be able to drag Master Bruce away from that cave of his,” Alfred comments wryly as he walks with Duke towards the office. He gives Duke a nod, then splits away from him, returning to the kitchen where Duke can hear Damian speaking to someone, probably Tim by the annoyed tone of his voice, and mentally wishes Alfred luck in handling them.
Duke sets the correct time on the clock in Bruce’s office and heads down to the Batcave, taking the steps two at a time. 
Bruce is already at the Batcomputer, shoulders tensed, when he arrives. 
“More bad news?” he asks as he makes his way over.
Bruce doesn’t bother looking away from the screen as he says, “More details about the fight. It seems the magical being called himself a ghost and was going on a rampage due to a betrayal. He says they nearly killed his son.”
“Oh, yikes.”
“And two of the scientists working with the government agency said that he stole their son and is keeping them from saving him.”
“Yikes,” Duke says with more feeling.
He doesn’t get to hear anymore details about JLD’s fight with this ghost when he catches a flicker in the corner of his eye. Duke turns and stares at the empty space in the Batcave near the medbay and watches as colorful magic gathers and swirls in dizzing circles. The portal opens a moment later and Zatanna steps out, looking exhausted and lightly singed. 
“Batman,” she greets, holding a white gun that looks like it belongs in an early sci-fi movie from the 60s. “The GIW is trying to arrest us. Constantine keeps burning their badges and documents so it shouldn’t be a problem, but they are determined to get this back. I wouldn’t be surprised if they came after you next. They’ve got some way of tracking things, but I didn’t have time to get any details before I had to leave.”
Bruce takes the gun from her hands carefully, looking it over with a sharp gaze. “Why would a ghost want to use a gun?”
“I don’t know. He had a variety of powers, too.”
“What does this do?”
“Shoots ice. He never let it go and nearly burned me alive for taking it before we subdued him.”
“We’ll keep it locked up,” Bruce promises. 
Zatanna sighs. It looks as though a physical weight fell off her shoulders. “Thanks. I’m going to head back to stop Constantine from getting into a fistfight with the GIW agents.”
She opens another portal with a waved hand and a muttered spell. Bruce is already walking away to set the gun down on a work station, so Duke is the one to wave Zatanna goodbye. 
By the time he reaches Bruce’s side, the gun is already dismantled, all pieces neatly set aside. Sticky notes denote which pieces go together and in what order. It looks the same as most guns, save for the aesthetic, but the heart of it is a glowing blue orb, large enough to cover the entirety of Bruce’s palm, and it brings a chill to the air.
Duke stares at it and feels his soulmark burn ice cold.
“Duke?”
It’s in his hands. He doesn’t remember reaching out to take it, but it’s in his hands. He can’t take his eyes off of it, cradling it gently and bringing it closer to his chest. 
It’s the same blue his soulmark once was. Before his soulmate began to fade, before every day became a waiting game to see how long his soulmate will last before they die. 
This has something to do with his soulmate. He’s sure of it. 
He won’t let anyone take it from him. 
“Duke. Give that to me.”
He doesn’t feel like he’s in his body. He’s detached, floating somewhere outside his body, puppeteering his limbs, making them move without feeling the motion. Shadows condense around his feet and Bruce takes a step back, wary. 
“Duke,” he says again, but Duke can’t find any words, can’t draw on his voice, can’t even look away from the bright, bright blue of the orb. It pulses lightly in his hand like a heartbeat. 
Bruce reaches a hand out. 
He’s pulled back by shadows before he can get close, and Duke holds the orb against his chest, right against his heart, and feels the cold seep into him. 
“Duke. I need you to look at me.” This time, Bruce’s voice has Batman’s growl in it, a heavy command that he can’t help but instinctively follow. He looks up and meets Bruce’s eyes, but he can’t focus. All his awareness is in his hands and the heartbeat of the glowing orb.
“I have to protect this,” Duke manages to whisper. “I… I think it’s alive.”
“Okay. Let’s get you to the medbay so you can sit down. We’ll figure this out, Duke.”
Bruce slowly, carefully, sets his hand on Duke’s shoulder. He keeps his attention away from the orb, so Duke allows it and lets Bruce guide him to the medbay and onto one of the medical cots. Bruce leaves him after a minute of quiet fussing, muttering about calling Zatanna.
Whatever. None of that matters when the heartbeat of the orb grows stronger, steadier, and Duke feels it match the beat of his own heart.
Time slips away from him. Distantly, he hears people move around the cave, speaking in low tones. A hand presses against his shoulder, warm, then moves away. 
The orb in his hand moves. 
Duke blinks slowly, then claws his way back to awareness, pushing past the haze that’s fallen over his mind. The orb turns over in his hand, then cracks right down the middle. The glow grows stronger, washing the medbay in blue light and a symbol appears on the orb.
It’s his soulmark. 
Later, he won’t be able to say why he did it. There were no thoughts, no reasonings, no explanations. Duke simply moved on instinct and lifted the orb up to his face and pressed a soft kiss against it. 
One moment, the orb was still.
The next, it had burst in a flash of light that blinded everyone in the Batcave, and then a thin, injured teenager had fallen into Duke’s lap. 
Hands immediately grab him, pulling him away from Duke. The teenager puts up no fight, eyes barely open, but he reaches for Duke weakly. On his wrist is the bright blue snowflake, the color strong and vivid. 
“That’s me soulmate,” Duke whispers as he watches Bruce and Tim set the boy down on another medical cot. 
“What?” Tim says, turning to face Duke, concern clear on his face. 
“That’s my soulmate,” he repeats, louder. Then, panicked, he pulls up his shirt enough to see his own soulmark; the color is still dull, weak, barely there, but it’s more blue that it has been in a while. He doesn’t need to say anything. Tim sees the dullness of his soulmark, looks at the boy, and puts the pieces together on his own.
“I’ll call Doc Thompkins,” he says, already moving to fix everything. Bruce remains where he is, making sure the boy is tucked in and breathing steadily before he returns to Duke. 
“Are you alright?”
Duke swallows roughly, unable to tear his eyes away from the boy. He’s pale and thin, as if he’d been starved, and there’s frost beginning to spread on the bedsheet from his fingers. “He’s my soulmate,” Duke manages to say. “He’s been dying for two years.”
Bruce’s eyes a hard, a determined light in them. “We’ll save him,” he promises. 
If anyone can, it’s Batman. 
If anyone can, it’s them, Batman and the Signal, and their entire network of family and friends. 
Duke’s been waiting for his soulmate to die all this time. Now, he’s going to save him.
3K notes · View notes
dduane · 9 months
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Do you have any recommendations on what to do when you can’t write?
I’ve been struggling to write for years, but telling stories is all I want to do. I have ideas and plots and characters all figured out! But actually getting the words onto paper? I just can’t do it. There’s a mental block or something getting in the way.
I want to write, I so badly do. I want to tell my stories! But no matter how hard I try, no matter how much I love the story, the words never work properly. I can day dream scenes up perfectly, but as soon as I’m near paper the words all vanish.
I guess what I’m actually asking is: how did you defeat the blank page?
Well, first of all, I can confidently tell you that your storytelling per se is working just fine. You just told me a perfectly cogent story right there, in writing. So that's good to know.
Now let me put your mind a little at rest by telling you something reassuring about the Writer's Brain:
It's not the sharpest knife in the block, if you take my meaning. It can be tricked. It can be fooled. It can be bamboozled into working when it doesn't want to... sometimes with embarrassing ease. (And this approach is, by and large, far preferable to sitting around over-analyzing one's interior life to figure out what went wrong with your developmental process somewhere in the dim lost past. Just hornswoggle the silly thing into working and then do the analysis later, if you can be bothered.)
Sometimes just changing something basic in the process the Writer's Brain is expecting is enough to make it lose the plot (so to speak...) and let you get on with work. And in your case I'd say, more or less immediately: Have you tried telling the story to yourself out loud, recording it, and then transcribing the recording?
Because this problem is a commonplace among storytellers. Sit them down in the pub and give them tea or a drink and start them going, and you'll get half an effortless hour of hilarious prose about What The Cat Did In The Middle Of The Night or When The Neighbors Were Fighting In The Street Again Yesterday. But show them blank paper, or an empty screen, and (now that the pressure to perform is suddenly in place) they freeze.
So try doing an end run around your writing brain. Borrow or otherwise procure a little recorder of some kind. (Or if you've got a smartphone, add a voice recording app to it.) Go get comfortable somewhere and get yourself into that daydream state, and then—making sure the recorder's on—start talking.
It doesn't have to be perfect unblemished prose. The pursuit of that comes later, after draft zero-minus-one. Just tell the story... or some of it. Or a fragment of it. Even a few paragraphs is a triumph, in a situation like this. You may, during the recording, have to talk yourself into the story stage by starting out talking about something else first. Let that happen.
Then when you're done recording, listen to it and transcribe it (typed or handwritten, as you please).
And maybe a day later, do this again. And a day or two later, once more. And so forth.
You're going to have to keep at this, because your Writer's Brain may start suspecting what you're up to, and try throwing spanners into the works. (Its favorite being "Oh, this isn't working, I may as well give up..." Pay no attention to that nagging little voice behind the curtain. Just keep doing what you're doing. Persistence is a superpower.)
The thing to keep reminding yourself, as you settle into this process, is that sooner or later the WB's resistance is going to flag, because you really do want to tell stories. It does too. What you have to teach it is that—to coin a phrase—resistance is useless. :)
Anyway: give this a try. You'll need to be doing this daily for at least a couple of months to find out whether it works or not. So let me know how it goes.
(BTW: once you've broken through the barrier, you may well find that dictation is a good routine way for you to generate your first draft. At that point—should you feel inclined to go a little higher-tech than recording and hand transcription—let me recommend Dragon Anywhere. This is a month-to-month subscription version of Dragon's flagship text to speech program—the one @petermorwood and I got Terry Pratchett to use when he started having difficulty typing. I use Anywhere a lot, on days when it's easier to write stretched out or lying down than it is sitting up. It transcribes what you say, and then you can just email it to yourself and cut-and-paste it into your writing document. Very handy.)
Hope this helps!
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k00sblogger · 2 months
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Summary: So you have a sugar daddy... but you may have forgotten to mention you've never engaged in anything sexual.
Warnings: pwp, age gap, blowjob, pussy eating, dirty talk, virginity loss, loving sex, sugar daddy obv, they kinda cute ngl.
Pairing: sugardaddy!jk x fem!reader
🔗: m.list 🔗: series m.list
★━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━★
The bright light from your phone makes you squint as you scroll through chanels website. Your decorated nail constantly tapping against the screen everytime you scroll, none of the bags cute enough to pull your interest yet.
Ten minutes pass before you finally set your tired eyes on something you might like. The mini flap bag, it's nice- you have to admit it.
At first, you were never one for designer items- and you never even bothered to bat your eyes towards a expensive store.
Okay maybe that wasn't completely true.
Technically, you had longed for a expensive bag, jewelery, or clothing before, you'd just never had the money to afford it. Things were different now- and 6'000 dollars for a bag was nothing.
You could thank jungkook for that.
Meeting him at a bar was coincidental, but you were greatful regardless. The two of you hit it off, and talked for months on end after meeting each other.
He was buying you expensive things even before a deal was established between you both. You rejected the little gifts in the beginning, but there was only so much you could do when he started to send things to your house without letting you know.
You don't really remember exactly how you both came across the whole sugar daddy thing, but you were quite drunk when it happened- so you didn't doubt that you actually agreed to the whole thing.
The problem was, you hadn't really done anything sexual before- and jungkook didn't know that. You were to scared to tell him, rightfully so.
You knew deep down you'd have to admit it to him sooner or later, it wouldn't be much longer before he'd expect something sexual from you in return for spoiling you all the time.
For now though.. you figured you were better off keeping your mouth shut about it.
Your fingers press a few more buttons before the purchase is made, and you smile when you see it'll be delivered by next wednesday.
A few moments later, your phone dings. The contact name causes your eyes to light up, and you click on his message almost instantly.
~~~
J: 𝚗𝚎𝚠 𝚙𝚞𝚛𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚜𝚎?
You: 𝚑𝚘𝚠'𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠?
J: 𝙸 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜.
You: 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚔𝚎𝚛
J: 𝚖𝚊𝚢𝚋𝚎
You: 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚍𝚊𝚢?
J: 𝚐𝚘𝚘𝚍, 𝚒 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚘𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚛𝚘𝚠.
You: 𝟾𝚙𝚖?
J: 𝚢𝚎𝚊𝚑, 𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚙𝚒𝚌𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚞𝚙.
You: 𝚔𝚔
~~~
Gosh, he was in his 30's yet he texted like he was your age.
That's the last thing said before you set your phone down on your nightstand, and flip over onto your side. You don't stay awake much longer, eyes slowly fluttering closed as you drift off to sleep.
◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•
At exactly 8pm the next day, your walking down your long driveway to jungkooks blacked out SUV. You do everything in your power to avoid looking at him, digging through your purse for absolutely nothing.
He unlocks the car as soon as you reach the door, watching attentively as you open the door and step inside.
"Hey." he says, biting on the inside of his cheek as he looks at your relaxed state- hand lazily resting on the wheel.
The smile on your face makes him smile as well. He shows his row of teeth without shame, never failing to let you see how much he loved hanging out with you.
If all "sugar daddys" were supposed to be wrinkly and weird, jungkook definitely wasn't a sugar daddy.
"Where do you wanna go?" you ask, setting your purse down on the floor of his car. Usually, you wouldn't do that- but this man's car was never not clean. You were convinced he had someone vacuum it out at least once a week.
He denied it when you brought it up, claiming it was always like that. Yeah fucking right.
"My place?" he asks, already pulling out of your driveway before you even nod your head. You sneak a gaze at the hand he's using to steer every few seconds, liking the way he does it so casually.
I mean- driving was a casual thing to do obviously. He just made it look hot.
He slightly turns up the music on the ride there, but keeps it low enough to hear you ramble about whatever your little heart pleased. Jungkook was a listener, at least when it came to you.
Hearing you talk about your life and whatever you did that morning made him happy.
Eventually, he moves his free hand to rest on your thigh- softly rubbing it up and down as he keeps his eyes on the road. He doesn't notice how his constant rubbing causes your skirt to ride up little by little, but you do.
Your hands are pressed to your sides, letting him mindlessly roam your skin with his hand. He doesn't acknowledge the fact that what he's doing is making you wet- god if he was to just lean over in the slightest he'd see your panties making a appearance from under your skirt.
You finally stop holding your breath when he pulls into his own driveway, house much different from your own. It takes him a whole minute just to get up to his garage.
When he pulls in, he turns off the car almost immediately- but he doesn't get out. Obviously you don't either, sitting in awkward silence as you wait for him to say something.
He removes his hand from your leg to rub his upper lip, letting out a deep sigh. "Y/n.."
There wasn't a way to explain his tone, you'd never heard him speak like this before. Your name falling from his mouth makes you look at him, just in time to see how he slightly moves his hips upward and then back down to get more comfortable.
Oh. You mentally curse yourself when you see the little bulge in his pants. Clearly the little soft rubs on your thigh were supposed to be a hint, you felt stupid.
"Oh-" you say, hands moving to take off your seatbelt and switch your position. Your knees now dig into the seat, facing him as he moves a bit of your hair behind your ear.
His eyes don't leave your face as you tug his zipper down, slightly tapping his thigh so he'll lift his hips. You pull down his jeans when he does so, taking in a breath when you see the bulge again.
It was a lot more prominent now that he was only in his boxers. Taking what you've learned from the twitter porn you'd watch, you leaned down to press soft kisses along the length of him.
"Pretty girl." he mutters, watching your every move. You hoped he wouldn't be able to tell this was your first time giving head.
Little by little you bring his boxers down, tucking your bottom lipping between your teeth when his dick springs out of the underwear. He was painfully hard, dick standing tall as you bring your soft hand around it.
You do a couple soft jerks up and down, occasionally looking up at his face to see if he was enjoying it. You smile when you notice his eyes are closed, head leaning against the headrest to take in all the pleasure you were giving him.
His quiet grunts make you want to lean down and give it a taste, you're just so nervous. What if he didn't like it? At this point you had to though, little spurts of pre cum were falling from his tip and getting onto your hand.
You take a deep breath before you finally lean down, jungkooks eyes locking with yours again when you lick the first stripe over his mushroom tip. His mouth is hanging open, hand resting lazily on your head.
He doesn't push your head down just yet, letting you take the lead. If you were someone else, he'd be fucking your face by now- but he wanted to get a feel for what you'd do on your own first.
"Oh fuckkk." his deep voice fills the car as you finally slide his tip in your mouth, softly sucking on the warm head. You use your hand to jerk what's not in your mouth, focusing on just his tip.
You weren't stupid, you knew the spot was sensitive for any guy. Maybe a little too sensitive even, because when you don't stop licking his tip he begins to thrust his hip upwards, forcing the rest of his dick into your wet mouth.
"Yeah? You like sucking my dick?" he asks, knowing well that you can't speak right now. Your mouth was so full of him, nose nudging against his pelvis.
After trying so hard not to, you finally gag hard enough for him to stop. Spit dribbles from your mouth when he finally pulls out, scanning your face with concern written all in his expression.
You can only hear your hard breathing for a minute, wiping your wet lips as you stare down at his lap. His length is fully covered in your spit, still hard and waiting for you to give it a release.
When you lean down to take him back into your mouth, he stops you. You sit up, his hand moving up to your face to rub your plump lips.
"This your first time doing this?" well shit, guess he could tell. The question makes you shift in your spot, you almost sit back down properly but he grabs your arm before you can.
The way he raises his eyebrows at you makes you finally give him a answer. "I haven't." you admit, anxiously biting on your lip. The constant biting causes your lip to turn red.
"Shit baby, why didn't you tell me?" he gives a tense chuckle, looking down at his still bare lower half and then back at you. You give a little shrug of the shoulders, muttering a quiet "I dunno."
He gives you a sigh as he rubs your cheek. You can tell he put great thought into the situation before pulling you close to him again. Your heads right over his tip again, waiting for him to say something."
"Put it in your mouth." he instructs, so you do. You slide his length into your mouth once again- much slower than you do the first time. This time around, his hand isn't so lazy on the back of your head, and he keeps a tight grip on your hair.
He toys with his lip piercing as he bobs your head up and down on his dick, you're still gagging but it's a lot softer. "Just like that.. sucking me so good." the praise, it made you squeeze your thighs together.
His moans are loud, massaging your scalp as you twirl your tongue around him. You did it own your own, and he's proud he doesn't even have to tell you. For this to be your first time, you're good at it. The only reason he noticed was because of how hard you gagged.
He brings his tatted hand up to the wheel, gripping it to steady himself. He tries not to fuck your mouth since you were so new at this, but he can't help it. "Need you to be a good girl for me- can you do that?"
You give him the best nod you can since he still deep in your mouth, and that's all the permission he needs. His hand keeps a good grip on your hair to ensure you keep your head in place, moving his hips up and down.
Grunts and little ah's fall from his pink lips, repeatedly pushing all the way into your throat before pulling out. It's rough for a first, but you like it so much. Your eyes are clamped shut, mascara beginning to run down your face.
He starts to bob your head as well, still not slowing his own thrusts. The combination of both is enough to make him bust, and when he feels his orgasm coming on he already knows he wants to cum in your mouth.
"Gonna cum down your throat okay?" he knows you can't say anything, but when you don't try to pull away from him he figures you want it too.
You only notice how soaked your panties are when his cum is shooting into your mouth, painting your tongue white with his seed. His hips finally slow to a stop, letting go of your hair and letting you sit up.
He grabs your chin before you can sit back down in your seat, looking at your messy face. "Swallow it, don't spit it out." you didn't plan on it, but you swallow it so he can see how much you enjoyed it.
You even go to the lengths of sticking you tongue out after you swallow, and once he sees it's empty he gives you a approving nod and let's go of your chin.
"Cmon, let's get in the house."
◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•
It's been a week since jungkook basically found out you were a virgin. You noticed he texted you much less, and you wondered if it was because of that.
It'd be bullshit if you said it didn't hurt your feelings. I mean, you genuinely liked hanging out with him- even if he didn't spend money on you you'd still spend time with him.
Speaking of that, he hadn't stopped spoiling you. Still sending you flowers and letting you buy whatever you wanted on his card. You hadn't bought much though, you didn't want to if he was thinking about ending this whole thing.
The voice of your friend yanks you out of your overthinking spiral, and you look towards her.
Gemma, you guys had been friends for years- rarely arguing and always having fun. The only downside to the friendship was the fact you guys had been friends for so long that she always knew when something was wrong.
Literally always.
"What's going on with you?" she questions, walking towards you as she continues raking her eyebrow brush through her brow.
You shake your head, not wanting to talk about it. You already thought about him enough, what good would talking about the guy do?
Gemma cocks her head to the left, plopping down next to you on the bed. You don't look at her, staring forward with a blank expression. Unfortunately, your forced to look back at her when she blocks your vision by shoving her face in front of yours.
"Cmon- tell me." you shove her out of your personal space, laughing at her attempts to make you talk. "Look gemma i-"
ding
It's your phone, and gemma looks toward it when she hears the noise. Since it's closer to her side, she grabs it, clicking it on & furrowing her eyebrows when she sees who's texted.
"J?" holy shit, of course it had to be him. You reach out for your phone without a word, but gemmas quick- moving out of your reach in enough time to click on the notification.
Nosy fucker, sometimes you regret giving her your password.
"Ooohh wait- he said he's outside!" Your eyes burst wide open, scurrying to your window as fast as you can. You peak through the blind and sure enough, it's his truck.
You couldn't have possibly forgotten that you guys were supposed to hangout, you barely had even talked to him this week. Which meant.. he'd shown up out of the blue.
Mentally, you thank yourself that you decided to do your makeup for no reason today, because it only takes you 5 minutes to throw on a cute outfit and grab a purse.
You stuff your charger and other necessities into your bag as gemma watches in shock, obviously she had no idea who jungkook was- but she figured it was something serious if he had you rushing out like this.
"Let yourself out! I'll see you later love you bye!" you ramble as you head out the door, gemma laughing behind you as she shuts the door.
As usual, you shuffle through your purse as you walk to his SUV, getting deja vu from last week. You couldn't help it, the walk to anyones car was so fucking awkward.
You hop into the car in silence, wanting to give him the silent treatment for just a little bit. He deserved it after putting you through hell the past couple of days. By hell you meant not talking to him every second of the day.
"Baby-" he starts, but you turn your body toward the window- not wanting to hear what he has to say. He understands why your upset, so he doesn't say much else and simply starts the car and pulls away.
~~~
Your doing your rambling as usual when jungkook finally reaches his destination. During the ride he'd explained why he hadn't spoken to you much recently, and you immediately felt like a bitch.
He told you how his work had him caught up, and reassured you that he wasn't out talking to some other girl. (Or any other sugar baby rather). He even brought you flowers, and that was enough for you to apologize for being so rude.
He forgave you instantly, understanding why you felt upset about it. The way he sees it if he was in your position, he'd probably be upset too.
You hadn't bothered to question where he was taking you until he finally put the car into park. You were at a lake, his SUV surrounded by trees and the only thing in front of you both was a wide range of water.
He comes around the side of the car to let you out, grabbing onto your hand to help you step out. He leads you up to two benches, watching you in awe as you admire the scenery of the place.
"So-" he starts, sitting down on the wooden bench as he looks out at the water. Here it was, you knew the conversation about you being a virgin wasn't completely over- and finally it crept back up on you.
"Why didn't you tell me hm?" he places a comforting hand on your thigh out of habit, the touch not sexual at all. You stare down for a long time before you answer, finding the right words to say.
"I just.. i was scared.. that you wouldn't want this anymore." it was quite clear that he was more than a sugar daddy to you, and you were more than a sugar baby to him. You had real feelings for him, you just couldn't actually say it.
"Sweetheart.. y'know i don't care about that right? I like you regardless." and there it was, jungkook on the other hand wasn't scared to admit it. He liked you a lot, and he wanted to do whatever he could to show you that.
"Don't care about that virginity shit, your still just as attractive to me." his words plaster a smile on your face, you don't know why you were so scared to tell him this. With the way he reacted.. you wish you'd told him much sooner.
The two of you sit in a comfortable silence for a while before you talk again, sparking up a conversation about a whole nother topic. The last thing jungkook wanted was to make you uncomfortable continuing to talk about it.
The situation was cleared up now, and that's all he cared about.
After spending a hour more at the lake you finally leave, turning up the music in the car as he drives you home. "I want it though." you say, voice just a bit louder than the music. Jungkook gives you a soft hum as he drives, questioning what you mean without uttering a single word.
"I want you to take my virginity." you say, feeling a sudden surge of confidence. Your confession makes him turn the music a bit lower, glancing over at your body in his passenger seat.
"We've got time baby." he says, turning onto your street now after a long twenty minutes in the car.
"It's gotta be the right time, and i wanna do it the right way."
◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•◦•
1 MONTH LATER
You've just gotten home from a long shift, jungkooks home to be specific. Your back and feet were aching from standing upright all day but when jungkook asked you to come over earlier that day you agreed in a haste.
You needed his presence more than anything today.
When you walk into that house, you expect darkness- but instead your surprised with candles along the floor lighting up the room.
"Holy...." your eyes light up at the sight, and you immediately know jungkook is behind this. The gesture almost makes you wanna cry, after a hard day at work this is what you really needed and wanted.
The closer you walk to his bedroom, (which practically had become yours as well) rose petals began to scatter the floor leading up to the door. A smile adorns your face when you slowly push the door open and you come face to face with jungkook.
He's proudly holding flowers in his hand, pink daffodils to be specific. He remembered the day you rambled about how much you liked them, if he'd gotten you anything else he wouldn't be satisfied.
"Jungkook.. you didn't have to.." your voice trails off as you take the flowers from his hand, pressing them up to your nose so you can smell them.
His built arms wrap around your waist after you set the flowers down, taking you into a big hug. You smell his cologne as soon as he embraces you, the same cologne he always wear that you've grown to love over the time you both spent together.
If you could, you'd douse yourself in it just so you could feel like he's close to you all the time. Sadly strong fragrances sometimes gave you terrible migraines, so that wasn't a option.
"I wanted to." he says, voice raspy as he tilts his head downwards so you can hear him better. He only separates his body from yours so he can kiss you at a better angle, his hand on your cheek as it quickly turns from a soft kiss to a make out session.
You'd stand on your tippy toes for as long as he wanted this kiss to go on, obsessed with the way his hands roam your body when he kisses you. Soon his tongue pushes as he backs you up closer to his bed, stopping the kiss when the backs of your knees hit his bed.
"Still want me to take your virginity?" he asks, and you can feel his warm breath against your lips since he's still so close. Of course, you nodded your head hastily- you wanted that more than anything.
You'd been wanting it.
"Say it." he says, voice stern rather than soft now. "I want you to take my virginity." that's enough confirmation for him, so he pushes you against the bed so he can take off his shirt.
You get the hint and undress along with him, opting to get completely naked rather than him who leaves his pants on- though he's already taken his dick out for you to set your eyes on.
He crawls between your already spread legs, happy that you weren't nervous for him to touch you. You had every reason to be nervous, considering he hadn't laid eyes on your naked body before- but you weren't.
He presses a tender kiss to your lips, and then your neck, your collar bone, your tummy, and then your inner thigh.
"Can I eat you out baby?" you were unsure about it, but you nod anyway. He presses a few more kisses to your thighs until he physically feels your muscles relax, and that's when he licks between your folds.
He gets a taste of how wet you are, and he can't stop- licking every part of you. His tongue dives in and out of your tight hole, lifting your thigh to rest on his shoulder as he sucks on your swollen clit.
"Fuck.. that feels good." your voice is much whinier than usual, and it makes him wanna shove his face even farther into your pussy.
"Yeah? Getting your pussy ate feels good?" god, he made you feel embarrassed in such a good way. His little dirty talk makes your stomach turn, thrusting your hips closer to his face.
You frantically nod as his licks grow even more desperate, your thighs beginning to close around your head. To your surprise, he pulls away from you before you can come- licking your slick off his reddened lips.
The loss of pleasure makes you roll your eyes, and he shakes his head when he sees it. "Don't complain, just want you to cum around my dick instead."
You understand and allow him to lift your thigh again, enjoying the way he looks at you like as if you were the prettiest thing ever. Shit you felt like it with the way he was just giving you head.
"Condom?" he asks, and you appreciate that he even mentioned protection- though you didn't really want it, so you shake your head.
He furrows his brows, gripping the base of his dick and slowly sliding it through your folds just to tease. "You sure?" he asks, but you don't bother to respond- in love with the split second of pleasure everytime his tip passed over your clit.
His body finally leans over your smaller frame, propping himself up with one arm. "It'll hurt.. just relax for me." that's all he says before he pushes it all in, one go.
It hurts his heart when you wince in pain, and he can feel the way you keep tightening around him. It sucks, but he wanted to get the penetration over with quickly instead of moving slow and making you suffer much longer than needed.
"I know, m' sorry-" he whispers into your ear, lying still so you can adjust around him. He'd sit still and patient as long as you needed, he didn't want to hurt you.
Your tears roll down your cheeks, ruining your makeup tear by tear- but you were too focused on the pain to even realize you were crying. Your little sniffles are the only thing heard until you finally speak.
"You can move." jungkook makes sure your relaxed enough before he finally pulls out, and then sinks back in. You're still feeling a painful stretch, but it's not as bad as it would've been if he didn't wait for a moment.
"It's okay.. trust me."
His thrusts are slow but deep, refusing to go faster until he knows you're only feeling pleasure. It takes a while, but soon the pain does go away- and a quiet moan of pleasure lets him know that.
Little by little, he picks up his pace as he stares straight into your hazy eyes. "Pretty girl, you were made for me." his voice was so sweet, a perfect contrast with the way he was thrusting into you.
His hips snapped against yours, being sure to press all the way in each and everytime he pushes into your cunt. Your nails dig into his bicep and he lets you, the pressure of your pussy swallowing his dick overriding the pain in his arm.
He moves his hand away from your thigh to massage your breasts, tired of staring at them bounce in his face and not doing anything about it.
"Fuck- yes." your moans are so much quieter compared to his, but he can hear it clear enough. His thumb rubs at your nipple, dick twitching at the way your face contorts at the feeling.
"Know you like that.. tell me how much you like it.." your face is flushed pink, you had trouble voicing how much you were enjoying- it just made you feel so awkward.
"Cmon.. wanna hear you say it for me." your mouth hangs open, confused on how he ever expects you to speak while he's fucking into you with so much force. "I..I like the way you touch me"
There it is. Your timid voice causes him to smirk, shoving his face into your neck to suck on the skin. He finally pulls away when the skin of your neck is red, and the sight of it has him ready to cum.
He's glad when he feels you keep tensing around him, a clear sign of you coming release. "Cum.. Cum all over it." your arms wrap up around his neck, pulling him down so his body is pressed right on top of yours when you cum around him.
"Oh shit-" the feeling of you releasing while he's still inside of you makes him cum on the spot- not giving him enough time to even think about pulling out of you.
You let him thrust into your sopping cunt a few more times, closing your eyes when you feel him paint your insides with his release. His little grunts are so satisfying to you, knowing that you did that to him was satisfying.
He finally pulls out with a sigh, moving over to the side and pulling your back to his chest. "M-Sorry fuck.. i didn't mean to.."
He didn't need to say it, and you didn't care anyway- you reassured him that it was okay and you'd just buy a plan b the next morning.
"I'll buy it for you." he says, and you don't even try to argue with him about it- he'd probably wake up before you just to go get it before you could purchase it on your own dime.
"Alright alright.." you say, closing your eyes and letting your muscles turn to mush as you begin to fall asleep.
"I wouldn't mind getting you pregnant tho-"
"Shut up."
(requested by @mxmokoa12)
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ellievickstar · 2 months
Text
Bloodied Bonds
A/N: This was...fun. I wanted to fit it all into one part but it was getting too long sooooo yeah.....have fun :)
Summary: When hanahaki disease festers in your lungs, how will your family help you while you hide it from your mate?
Pairing: Azriel x Reader, Rhysand x Sister!Reader
Warnings: Elain slander, dying
⋆༺𓆩☠︎︎𓆪༻⋆
There they were again.
Azriel smiled at Elain with those eyes…those eyes. And in your soul you felt the bond writhe with pain and clench in your chest. You remained still as you immediately brought your eyes to look at the ground beneath you. This hurt. This really hurt. A part of you wanted to deny it, wanted to believe that Azriel would remain faithful to you always, that he would stay true to the mating bond, something he desperately used to want before we got together.
Now, you were not so sure.
“Sweetheart…,” Cassian said from behind me, startling. He knew what you was seeing, saw it in his own brother’s eyes. Azriel may have always been a mystery to everyone else outside the inner circle, but his eyes — his beautiful hazel eyes — showed you everything you needed to know.
“I’m fine,” You waved Cassian off, bringing down shields on the bond, shutting out his emotions, the pain from it, and shutting yourself in as a stray tear slipped down your face, “I’m really fine,” You repeated.
Truth to be told, Cassian did not know what to say to you. After you had defended Azriel since you were kids, brought him to you and Rhysand’s mother, convinced her to take him in. Cassian did not know what could come over Azriel to internally betray you in this way. However as you began coughing Cassian was alarmed when you raced towards the kitchen sink and coughed out flower petals, one after another.
“What the hell-” He started, moving to pull back your hair as he observed what you had coughed out. Blood and petals coated the sink and as you choked them out one by one, slowly calming down, you waved your hand magicking it away. And it was then it hit him.
You were dying.
“Explain. Now.” He demanded. Looking away you mumbled.
“A few weeks ago after I first realised he loved her, I started coughing up flowers and my tears, my tears turned a gold colour. I asked Madja what was wrong. It’s a soul disease called hanahaki, caused by the betrayal of the heart and unrequited love. The tears were caused by the same thing, a unique symptom that is because of my magic due to being the High Lord’s sister. She said the flowers in my lungs will continue to grow until it suffocates me and I die. The star tears are just a symptom that causes physical pain, she doesn’t know if there will be any repercussions from it,” That’s all you managed to ramble out before you doubled over and heaved again, blood dripping out of your gaping mouth as you choked and coughed on the flower petals making their way up your throat.
Cassian was at a loss of words, on one hand he wanted to be angry, angry at you for keeping this from him, for not telling him sooner so he could beat the crap out of Azriel. On the other hand he was…devastated. You had always been like a sister to him, since he first met you as a kindred and fierce spirit when you were seven years old. The three of them had been twenty and Cassian had fell to his knees before the little girl with such a bright spirit, who dared to scream in Devlon’s face when he said females belonged in the kitchen.
Cassian had sworn to protect you.
And now, against a disease he felt helpless.
“Is there a cure?” He asked.
“Madja said there were two ways, either Azriel proves that he still loves me, which we both know won’t happen when he won’t stay away from Elain for more than a few hours, or I could have the flowers cut from their roots and removed, it’s a risky procedure and even successful all my feelings towards Azriel will be removed entirely, given the mating bond, she thinks it will be stripped from my soul. I….I wanted to wait.”
“So you either have your emotions robbed from you, make Azriel realise he’s an idiot, or die?”
You nod.
“Tell Azriel,” “I can’t!” You hissed, “We both know I can’t. He loves her, Cassian, I can feel it, I can see it, everytime he looks at her it’s like she’s the one who hung the stars and moon while when he looks at me that light dies!” You bang your fist on the table.
You point to where Azriel and Elain was far out in the gardens. His shadows no where to be seen, both blissfully unaware of what was going on inside with you and Cassian.
“He acts like she’s the one who went through countless of interrogation, of torture, when she got captured by enemies. He acts like she was the one who protected Velaris with Rhysand when she went under the mountain to be taken advantage of, when Amarantha held me down and tried to force answers out of me,” You let out another pained cry as you slid to the ground, “I have done everything for him, been through hell and back with him. And even after everything he still wants her, still wants to be with her, still doesn’t want me.”
Cassian brought you closer to him as he sat next to you and let you cry on his shoulder.
You cried and cried, and cried until there was nothing left. Cried until you couldn’t cry.
And when you finally fell asleep from exhaustion, Cassian glanced out the house to the gardens where his brother trailed Elain, and Cassian made a decision.
⋆༺𓆩☠︎︎𓆪༻⋆
“You told my brother!?” You shrieked. Rhysand and Cassian was now sitting around you in Rhys’s study.
“You told Cassian before me?” Rhysand shot back. You rolled your eyes as you scoffed, “Oh please I didn’t tell him anything I was throwing up flowers in front of him, not much I could do except explain.”
Shaking his head, Rhys sighed as he glanced at Cassian and they both shared a look. Narrowing your eyes, the tendrils in your mind crept towards your brother and the general, and surprise coated your face when you realised they had shut you out.
“Let me remind you what I do is my choice.”
“Not when your life is at stake,” Rhysand retorted.
So he had decided something against your will already. Of course, your brother who wanted to help everyone, your brother who thought you were his responsibility, his burden to bear. Your brother who claimed to value your opinion oh so much but then never, not once, ever considered how you feel in anything that had to do with you.
“He doesn’t care. I haven’t even been actively hiding it from him, it’s just that he’s never around to notice,” You said bitterly, “Did you know he missed my birthday? You all did. Because usually he’s the one going around reminding everyone the week before. Did you know our anniversary passed and I had waited for him all day just to realise he was with her?” Stray tears slipped down your cheeks as you tried to hold them back.
Crying meant that you were weak.
And you hated being weak.
That was when Cassian spoke, “Have Madja remove the flowers.”
Rhysand shot a look at him.
“She won’t survive otherwise. Even as we discuss this now she is running out of time, Rhys. Azriel’s infatuation with Elain is unforgivable and at least this way we can save her. Their relationship might never be the same but if Azriel is truly in love with Elain as she feels, then it is possible this way everyone wins.”
“I don’t want the male who almost killed my sister in my court,” Rhys bit out.
“Convincing Azriel that what he is doing is wrong will take too long. Maybe we should have interfered when it first started but now it’s too late. We can still save her, really save her. Not their relationship but at least she’ll live,” “And live with a bond that will eventually diminish into nothing?” “Maybe it’s better that way.”
Glancing between Cassian and your brother, your own inner turmoil seemed to be playing out in front of you as they discussed everything that you had not been able to come to terms with yourself. A part of you could still hardly believe that Azriel would do something like this, hurt you in this way when he himself swore that he would be loyal for eternity.
Mates.
A sacred connection that determined your equal, your partner in everything.
But your parents were mates too…and that did not work out well. So maybe it was time for you to let your mate go.
However, as you opened your mouth to agree with Cassian, to agree that maybe the best option would be to remove the flowers directly, the consequences of your feelings being stolen be damned, a cough climbed up your throat.
And as you coughed out bloody petals onto Rhysand’s office floor….everything went dark.
⋆༺𓆩☠︎︎𓆪༻⋆
It had all happened quickly, too quickly for Rhysand’s liking.
One moment he was debating with Cassian how they would save his sister’s life, the next moment as she was about to say something and he watched in horror as blood came out instead of words. Her eyes drooped and he raced to catch her from hitting her head on the hard wooden floors, and as his ears started ringing, holding his sister’s lifeless body in his arms, as he watched golden tears stream out of her eyes, he noticed there was someone screaming.
And it was not until his throat hurt, until his own throat burned, that he realised he was the one screaming, crying out loud for his sister who’s body seemed as lifeless as the one he had lost all those years ago.
“Get Madja!” He roared at Cassian, “Get her NOW!”
Less that a minute went by when Morrigan and Feyre came into the room, Feyre let out a horrified gasp as Mor took in the scene, freezing as she realised her cousin, her best friend, her only companion during the times after Eris and Keir, was in Rhysand’s arms, still and lifeless even as blood trickled out of her mouth and gold spilled form her closed eyelids.
Madja came shortly after, and Y/N’s body was moved to a different room for Madja to work, Cassian explaining what happened and the illness in Y/N’s body that was causing this. Morrigan took a few steps back, before she crashed into the wall of the hallway and let out her own sob.
And for the first time after Rhysand and Y/N had returned from the mountain, Morrigan wept.
Two days passed, and Y/N did not wake.
Madja estimated that they would have to make a decision within the week whether they would tell Azriel, or cut the flowers out.
And in those two days Azriel did not come.
It was only after Rhysand had asked him to meet, told him about Y/N did Azriel finally realised he had not seen his mate in days. That he had not even spent more than fifteen minutes with her in the past few months.
It was only after Rhysand said that Y/N was dying, did Azriel reach down the now cold and empty bond, and realise he had shut her out. And when he let his walls down, experienced the agony, the pain, the grief she felt even in her unconscious state, did Azriel regret.
“Why didn’t she tell me…” Azriel whispered.
“Because she heard you when I told you to stay away from Elain. I looked into her mind and I realised the day her disease started she went to find you, and you had been in my office, yelling at me that the cauldron had made a mistake, that you wanted Elain,” Rhysand laughed coldly. Even Rhys in all his beauty, his eyes were now red from sobbing, his voice hoarse from how he had cried, and cried.
“Good job, Azriel,” Cassian said from the doorway, “You got what you wanted. Your bond will no longer exist once she awakes…that’s if she survives even.”
“No….I don’t,” Azriel muttered, “Rhysand…what conversation?” Rhysand furrowed his eyebrows, “Are you really playing this game with me now? My sister is DYING! AND YOU WANT TO PRETEND LIKE YOU FORGOT WHAT YOU SAID!?”
Azriel’s eyes looked back and forth between his brother’s….when did he…when did he even get here?
Where was his mate?
Why did it feel like something just cleared from his head?
That was when Elain stepped in, holding a mug and what looked to be tea.
“Azriel, i heard your distress, drink this it will make you feel better,” She said softly, but as Rhysand’s eyes narrowed on the mug, it was Cassian who snatched it out of her hands, brought it to his eyes and shattered it on the already ruined hard wood floors.
“That was not just tea.”
“I have no idea what you mean.”
And as Cassian lifted his head he declared, “As General of the Night court, I arrest you for illegal possession and use of aphrodisiacs. You are charged with attempted murder of the Princess of the Night Court. You are charged with manipulation and forced betrayal of the court’s spymaster,” And with a menacing grin Cassian said, “And you are charged because you bloody annoy me and you…what you have done today makes me want to rip you to shreds.”
A beat passed.
“That is….” Cassian continued as he glanced at Azriel, with each blink clarity seemed to return to the shadowsinger as he processed everything, as he remembered everything Elain made him do, as he remembered how he had hurt his mate, “That is if Azriel decides he doesn’t want to kill you first.”
Elain let out a scoff, looking down at the spilled tea and broken pieces of ceramic in disgust, “Azriel loves me. Azriel should love me not that disgusting slut of a female, she might be a princess but she is-,” “Mine.” Azriel interrupted.
“She was mine before you interfered. She was mine before you made me break her.” Azriel turned, no doubt to go find Y/N.
“Start counting your days, Elain, because now they are numbered.”
⋆༺𓆩☠︎︎𓆪༻⋆
Azriel taglist: @kemillyfreitas @going-through-shit @chessebookgirl
Part 2 here!!
Love, Ellie.
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