#maybe i should create another one for stupid shit

[lateseptemberdawn]

insane how i made this acc for my ig page and like for literature and bookstagramming things and instead i'm doing...this. wtv this is T_T

[benedictscanvas]

omggg in my fluffy needing comfort era and i LOVE how you write jamie tartt x reader- could i make a request for jamie x chronically ill reader where he is just really supportive and loving with someone who is long-term sick? ♥️♥️

of course, my love. thank you for the kind words. i tried to make this as vague as possible so people can relate in their own ways. sending you love! <3 | gn!reader, 1.2k words, tw chronic illness & pain, language

You'd just about managed to get your hair how you wanted it to look for the evening, with minimal swearing for once. Jamie was sat on the bed waiting for you, he'd been ready for a good few minutes now, but you were still reluctant to emerge. There was a wave of pain undulating through you that you were trying to ride out in silence without alerting your boyfriend.

"Y' alright, love? No rush, I wanna be fashionably late anyways," he said from the next room, raising his voice so that it reached you through the closed door. You hardly ever closed doors around each other, so you should have known he'd be worried.

The pain wasn't dissipating, so you took a few deep breaths before stepping out into the bedroom with a smile that you hoped was normal.

"Sorry, my hair wasn't co-operating," you say, tilting your head as you take him in. Navy trousers, white shirt, brown jacket. He looked effortlessly gorgeous, even if he had one more button undone than you would have suggested. Some things didn't change, "You look so good, Jamie."

"Me?" he said incredulously, standing up and huffing out a breath of disbelief, "You look...fuck. I'm not good enough with me words for this."

His hands gesture aimlessly down your outfit and you feel a real smile blossoming under his attention. You take his hands in yours and place them on your waist, stopping his flapping from going further.

"I like your words just fine. And your face," you add with a grin that he returns, curling his fingers into the fabric he's found. A new wave of pain crests and you try your hardest to keep it off your face, but don't think about how your body must tense under his touch. His whole face crumples.

"Ah shit," he murmurs, running his hands down your arms to interlace your fingers together as he takes a step closer, "Why didn't y' say anythin' babe?"

"About what?" you ask pathetically, watching him fix you with a look that said 'cut the shit'.

"Cut the shit," he said, clearly deciding the look wasn't enough, "We agreed, babe, you tell me if it's a bad day so I can help. Or at least try to. Thought we were in a good place with it."

Your heart aches. He really does hate it when you keep your pain to yourself, even though you're not sure he yet understands just how much pain you would be sharing if you shared all of it. You'd been dating for six months, but still wanted to be careful not to scare him off.

"I am. I promise, Jamie, I do tell you it's just..." you struggle for a good explanation that doesn't create any pity in him, "Tonight's big, you know? I want to be a proper girlfriend and I want to burst into tears and kiss you stupid when they call your name for that award."

There is a little bit of pity in his eyes when you've finished, so you can't have done a very good job of it. He squeezes your hands tightly in his.

"Can't say it many more ways," he says softly, "But y' gotta believe that you are me priority, gorgeous. Jus' wanna look after you, y' know. I wanna be a proper boyfriend too."

You'd never thought about it that way. Another wave of pain hits and Jamie's instantly stroking your temple when your eyes clench shut. You feel his lips on the opposite side of your head as he whispers sweet little comforts in your ear.

If it wasn't so painful, maybe you'd be more willing to argue the point with him. It would have to be a battle saved for later, because lying down was the only option for the moment. You could feel the sting of tears; it couldn't have been a worse time for a flare up.

"I'll be there for every other award you win," you say forcefully, but you can't bring yourself to promise. Sometimes you worry you can't promise him enough, but then you see the way he looks at you as he leans backwards again and a lot of that worry falls away.

"You're way too sure that I'm winnin' this award, by the way," he says, a little bashful. It was one of your favourite versions of him, "I'm up against quality."

"None of that. The most creative player in the league this season was you. Hands down. I think you know that really."

He nods, but doesn't look sure still. Then he's stepping away from you as he shrugs off his jacket, throwing it onto the back of a chair and flopping down on the bed.

"Come on then, love. We can fit in a quick episode of whatever you want before the ceremony's on TV."

You stare at him.

"What?"

"Well I'm not fuckin' going without you," he laughs, like that was never an option, "Duh. I'd be bored shitless. I know you need to lie down, babe, come on."

He holds out a hand to you. You take it, still dazed by the sudden turn of events, let him pull you onto the bed and into his arms on top of the covers.

"There we are," he breathes, pressing kisses into the top of your head, "Perfect. We'll have a much better evening bein' able to laugh at Roy makin' a fool of himself for the cameras from 'ere, right?"

Coming back to your senses, you pull yourself out of his arms for a moment so you can look at him properly. He's been acting normal up until now, but when he sees the tears in your eyes, his whole face softens.

"Let's not argue right now, love, please," he begs, "Wanna take care of you, so jus' let me. We can talk about it tomorrow."

"Your award..." you choke out, but he shushes you.

"Will be waitin' for me at the club tomorrow. Me speech would have been fucked anyway, so there's nothin' to miss out on."

There's no room for argument in his voice. It's as firm as it is comforting. Relenting as the pain hits once again, you snuggle back into his arms, kissing whatever parts of him you can reach.

"Like my guardian angel," you say, trying not to sound so teary, "So grateful for you, Jamie. Love you so so much."

"Yeah, yeah, love you too," he says, brushing you off as you expected but with fondness in his tone as he pulls you even closer.

"Hey...you just said the award would be waiting. You're finally admitting that you're definitely getting it?"

He chuckles.

"Course I'm getting it. That award's mine, babe," he says, cocky smirk firmly on his face that you can only see in the reflection of the TV. Then he gasps, comically, "Do y' think they'll make Roy do me speech?"

You gasp right back, already feeling better.

"Yes! If you put it on now, we might be able to see him flip people off on the red carpet beforehand."

Jamie grins as he struggles to reach the remote and turns the TV on.

"Fuckin' genius, you are."

---

please see this post if you would like to request your own roy/jamie drabble!! closing soon <3

[strniohoeee]

i need me some more hoodrat chris bestie pleasee😣

maybe another scenario where reader is out with her friends and some guy won’t leave her alone so she says “ just wait till my man gets here ” and then the guy is like “ i ain’t scared of no lil white boy” and then chris shows up with his blicky 😋😋😋

Racketeer Pt. 2

Pairing: Chris Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Y/N and her friends are out clubbing for her best friends birthday, but this one guy won’t leave them alone. She calls Chris and he’s ready to kill for her🖤

Warnings⚠️: Once again pure self indulgence of hoodrat Chris, but also there’s talks of a pew pew in here obviously🤭 so enjoyyyy

Song for the imagine: No Suburban, Pt.2- Sheff G

You get shot down if you play his songs

I keeps Glock round’, I would let it off

Chris hated it when I went out alone, or with my homegirls because he felt like he couldn’t be there to protect me. Honestly I preferred it because Chris would watch every one like a hawk, and was prepared to pop a cap on anybody.

Tonight was my best friend's birthday, and she wanted to go to all the clubs downtown, and bar hop, but she wanted it just a girls night out. So when I told Chris this you can imagine the shock on his face

“Just the girls….” He said looking at me

“Yes Chris, just the girls” I said laughing

“Ima be like Batman…sneaking into that bitch and hiding in the shadows” he said

“Okayyyy creeper much” I said laughing at him again

“I’m kidding ma, but if anybody tries some crazy shit you know what to do” he said

“Yes I do, call you, ignore the person and hope you don’t pop the guy” I said rolling my eyes

“Exactly! This is why I love you” he said coming over and kissing me

Tonight was the night of my best friends extravaganzas, and I was currently finishing up getting ready. Chris decided he would drop me off at the first club since he didn’t trust Uber drivers and me alone. He’s very protective

I had gotten all dolled up in a black short sleeve long bodycon dress with glittery silver heels on, and my glitter clutch. I had done my hair and makeup up (however you want it be)

I walked out to the living room to let Chris know I was ready to go

“Baby I’m ready” I said walking to him in the living room

“Ouuuuuu someone’s looking real fucking good” he said reaching his hands out to grab me

“Aww thank you baby” I said leaning down and kissing him

“Alright let’s head out” he said grabbing my hand and walking us to his car

After about 30 minutes we had gotten downtown and to the first club. He put the car in park

“Alight baby I Love you, and I’ll keep you posted the whole night” I said giving him a kiss

“Love you too mama, and just know I’ll be right by my phone. If anything happens please baby call me” he said with puppy dog eyes

“I will my love” I said giving him one last kiss before heading out

My best friend and our homegirls and I were all partying and having a blast, she got a VIP section in the third club we were at. I had a few drinks and I was feeling good. Texting Chris every 20 minutes that everything was okay, and even sending him selfies and pictures of the girls and me.

I had decided to go to the bathroom alone which was probably the first biggest mistake of the night. To get to the bathroom I had to pass the cigar smoking area and the men’s bathroom, and that’s when I started to realize I might’ve done something stupid.

As I was walking to the bathroom some man stopped me

“Hey beautiful, where are you headed?” He asked me

“To the restroom” I said bluntly

“You should come hang with the real gentlemen up here” he said smirking down at me

“No, I'm good. I’m here with my friends” I said giving him a fake smile

“They can join us too” he said looking over at his friends

“We all have boyfriends. No thanks” I said, and with that I walked to the bathroom

Should I tell Chris? Should I not…..no he’ll come in here and create a big ass show.

I finished using the bathroom, and had to walk back pass these animals

“Nothing weird come sit with us” he yells as I speed past him

“I said no! Don’t you understand the word no? Leave me alone” I said shooing him with my hand and walking back down to our VIP area

“Hey girl where you been” my friend asks me

“I went to use the bathroom, and this creep wouldn’t stop talking to me” I said to them

“Oh god don’t let Chris find out” she said and started to laugh

“Honestly if he keeps trying me I will call Christopher” I said to them

About 20 minutes later we were all dancing in the VIP area when I feel eyes on me from above, so I look up, and that creepy guy with all his friends were watching my friends and I…..they looked like they were hunting for their next snack.

“FUCKING GO AWAY” I yelled up at him

“JUST ONE CHANCE BABY, ONE DANCE” he yelled back

“YO CREEPY GUYS WE ALL HAVE SHOOTER BOYFRIENDS I SUGGEST YOU BACK OFF” my best friend screamed at him

“WE DONT CARE ABOUT NO BOYFRIENDS” he yelled back

“LEAVE US ALONEEEEE” my other friend screamed at them, and we just went back to dancing

I’m going to say another 20 minutes went by, and all of a sudden these guys are walking towards our VIP area.

“Y/N I’m thinking now’s a good time to call Chris” my one friends said

“I think I will” I said grabbing my phone out of my purse

But before I could call Chris this asshole came up to us

“Come on pretty girl, why won’t you give me a chance” he said frowning

“Like I said I have a man” I said sipping my drink, and not even looking at him

“Oh baby I won’t tell no one” he said smiling at me

“Can you go away like I literally keep saying I have a man, and I don’t want to talk to you” I said rolling my eyes at him

“Well too bad baby. I won’t stop” he said trying to walk closer to me

“Oh no” I said sticking my foot out and pushing him back with my heel

“Just fucking wait till my man gets here” I said grabbing my phone to call Chris

“I ain’t scared of no lil white boy” he said laughing at me

I hit Chris contact and put the phone to my ear

“Hey baby, parties over already?” he asked laughing a bit

“Chris…” I said, and he immediately knew

“Where are you? And who’s bothering you” he said, and I heard him get off the bed

“I’m at Raven, and it’s some guy here who will not leave the girls and I alone. Like I just had to push him away with my foot he was getting so close” I told him

“Stay right there baby, and Ima be there real fast” he said, and I heard him load up his gun, and cock it

Oh boy these guys were in for a treat. About 30 minutes passed, and I saw Chris walking through the crowd

“Yooo Christopher” my best friend said giving him a handshake

“Thank you baby” I said as he came and sat next to me on the little couch

“Always baby, always” he said kissing my head

“Other than that creep how’s the birthday night going” he asked my friends

“Oh it’s going greattttt” they all said clearly very tipsy

I saw the guy again in the crowd watching us, and I knew he was about to come over

“That’s him Chris” I said tapping Chris, and having him look at the guy

Chris looked over at the guy dropping his face, and giving the guy a smug smirk

The guy still had the balls to walk over

“Ahhh the little boy toy” the guy said walking into our area

“Mmm I’d watch how I’m speaking to my man” I said to the guy

“Or what?” He said laughing

Chris laughed and leaned back allowing his pistol to be slightly exposed in his waistband.

“I’d choose my next words carefully” Chris said looking at the guy

“Who do you think you are” the guy said getting pissed

In a swift moment Chris got up, pulling the guy close to him, and placing the pistol at the guys dick

“I’m her boyfriend, and she’s been telling me you and your little stupid ass friends have been bothering her and her friends all night. Is this true” Chris asked him

“I don’t know what she’s saying” the guy said looking at Chris in fright

“IS THIS TRUE” he said pushing the barrel harder into the guys dick

“OKAY YES YES” he said getting scared

“If a lady tells you no, and she has a man you BACK THE FUCK OFF” Chris said to the guy

“Yeah yeah sure I got it” he said starting to sweat

“I’m not sure that you do get it…..maybe I have to pull the trigger” Chris said and started to cock the gun

“NO NO IM SORRY OKAY. I NEVER MEANT TO BOTHER THEM IM SORRY PLEASE LET ME GO” the guy started to weep into Chris arms

“Yeah, and guess what you’re paying for their whole tab, or I’ll be waiting outside for you, and I’ll split your fucking wig GOT IT” Chris said to the guy

“Yes I’m sorry I’m sorry” the guy said putting his hands up

“Now get the fuck outta here you fucking pussy before I change my mind and blow your dick off” Chris said pushing him back

The guy ran away, and Chris placed the pistol back in his waistband

“Fucking pussy….the fuck he thought he was” Chris said looking over his shoulder at the scared man

“Uhhh I love when you do that Chris” I said pulling him in to sit next to me

“I told you I’d do anything for you, and if it means popping someone…I’m gonna fucking do it” he said slinging his arm over my shoulder and giving me a kiss.

“To Chris for saving the day” my best friend screamed and we all cheered our cups together

I guess I’m in love with a shootah!

The End

I loveeeeee hoodrat Chris like okayyyyy😋🤞🏽. Lmk if yall liked this one as much at the first one 💋💋💋Also sorry I didn’t post at all yesterday I just wasn’t in the writing mood, but now we’re back🤭🫶🏽

-J💅🏽

[thetopichot]

•°♧ Late Night Phone Call P. 1 ♧°•

A little idea that I had last night that I wanted to write about. In this silly little group of headcanons about our beloved Yuuriboys, you have trouble sleeping & the boys offer some help with a nice phone call to help you sleep.

•°◇ Alphonse ◇°•

Al was working a little late tonight at his shop. One of his candy shelves fucking broke & like a shit-load of candy in the jars broke. Now, he's gonna have to spend all fucking night cleaning this up. He sent a text to you saying:

sorry boo

gonna be late coming home

my goddamn shelves broke on me as I was fucking leaving

You didn't mind that he sometimes came home late since he always lets you know why he's late. He doesn't want you worrying so much about him. So, you got ready for bed as usual without him. However, for some reason, you had trouble getting yourself to fall asleep. Was the bed always this freezing cold?

Normally, you would be able to fall asleep without him, but ever since you guys recently moved in together, you kinda had a harder time sleeping whenever he's not with you. So, you decided to check up on Alphonse to help soothe your worry.

Hey babe?

yeah boo? u alright?

Yea, I'm okay. I just miss you right now.

aww ya miss me?

Of course, I do. You ding dong. 🙄

jeez you're so mean to me 😔

but I love you too boo 🫶

You smiled at the text, but it didn't really soothe you completely. You wanted more than that. You wanted to hear his voice.

Do you wanna get on a call?

I'm bored and I can't sleep.

sure boo

Alphonse is calling...

"Hey, boo." You hear Alphonse's tired voice from your phone. You frowned slightly.

"Are you okay, Al?" You asked him.

"Not gonna lie to ya, boo. I feel like ass right now." You hear the sound of shattered glass being moved by a broom. "I just wanna go the fuck home but this glass is a hazard & I don't wanna get sued because of this shit."

"How did that happen, bae?"

"I don't fucking know." He huffed with both frustration & confusion. "As I was gonna close up shop for the night, I heard this loud ass crash from the back. Then, BAM!" He clapped to mimic the sound of the falling shelves. "Then, I was like, 'The fuck was that?' & guess what the fuck I see?" You hummed in response. "The fucking shelves fell off & I'm here cleaning this shit up." He sighed.

Then the call got quiet. "Hey, boo?" No response coming from you. "Boo?" You hummed. Alphonse chuckled. "You finally getting sleepy, boo?"

"Hmm-hm." He couldn't see your smile, but he felt it. "I like your voice. It makes me feel..", you paused as you tried to fight back your sleep, "..safe."

"Really?" Alphonse felt flattered by that statement. He started grinning like a goober as his face flushed a little. "I'm glad to hear that. Maybe I should rant more often."

"That would be nice.." You yawned. "You got another.. rant?"

"You know I do, boo, you know I do."

•°♤ Auron ♤°•

Auron was working late tonight due to the abundance of paperwork. Celebrities did stupid things & did reckless shit. Now he's sitting in his office, trying to tie all of the loose ends created by them. Of course, he's pissed as fuck about it & he's quite close to bang his head on his desk. However, he must show restraint & poise.

He felt bad. You were waiting for him at his penthouse & he would very much rather cuddle with you in bed than to be stuck at his desk. Earlier, you wanted to have a nice movie night with him, but before you were going to prepare some coffee for him, he sent you a text.

I'm sorry, darling. I don't think I'm going to be able to join you in our little movie night.

You frowned as you started to text him back.

Why? What happened?

Just some unfinished paperwork caused by celebrities who know nothing about decency.

I will be here for quite some time, dearest.

But in the meantime, you should head to bed. I don't want to catch you sleeping at your desk, understood?

Sir, yes, sir! 🫡

He smiled softly at the message as he placed his phone down on his desk. However, it was going to be a long night for the both of you. You began your bedtime ritual without Auron & got as snug as a bug in a rug but for some strange reason, you couldn't fall asleep. The bed felt more... emptier & colder than usual. Yeah, sure, there were nights that he would come home late, but this night made you long for him more than normal.

You felt nervous about texting him. You didn't want to come off as too needy, but he did say that you could come to him if you needed anything. You decided to push down those thoughts & just text him.

Hey, hun?

Yes?

Would it be alright if we got on a call?

Of course, Rook.

Auron is calling...

"Good evening." Auron's voice spoke. "Shouldn't you be sleeping by now? It's not like you to be up this late, my dear."

"I should be asking the same thing." Auron chuckled.

"To be fair, I've already told you why," Auron sighed, "However, I could go into further detail if you like." You hummed a 'Yes'. You hear Auron adjusting himself as he prepares to rant. "Well, our most recent celebrity was caught in a controversy with the others. Being quite abrasive towards fans & collaborators. Now, I'm here trying to help sort everything out since this all came last fucking minute." He groans. "I'm trying to at least organize everything now, so it won't be such a pain the ass at work tomorrow."

Auron paused as he heard a light snore from his phone. "Rook?" No answer. "Rookie?"

"Hmm?" You answered sleepily. Auron laughed.

"Am I boring you to sleep, dearest?"

"No. It's just... your voice is really soothing." You admitted. You couldn't see it, but Auron's face flushed slightly. He was giddy inside, but he was trying to hide it.

"Oh, really? You enjoy the sound of my voice?" His voice got softer. "I might as well talk to you to sleep."

"Yes, please." You felt Auron's unseen smile.

"Very well, then. What should I discuss?"

•°♧ Big Red/Lucien ♧°•

You were visiting family for the holidays & you told Lucien to babysit your home for the weekend. As much as you loved your man, bringing a big demon boyfriend would raise a shit load of questions & neither of you are feeling up to answering all of them. Lucien is also learning how to use a phone since, in Hell, they don't really have phones & he has big ass hands which makes it harder for typing.

did u male it tg your parenys house yet?

Yeah, I did. Is there something you need, baby?

i wass just woreied about you angel

Aw, don't worry. I'm fine.

Are you doing alright without me?

yeah i jist moss you so much :(

I miss you, too. ❤️

Shit, wait. I gotta go. I'll see you later, babe.

stat safe angel

"What are you smiling about?" Your cousin asked while grinning devilishly. "Is it your boyfriend?"

You rolled your eyes. "Yes but, that's none of your business."

"Are we gonna meet him one day?" They asked. You looked nervous but, you still remained calm.

"He's super busy all of the time but, maybe one day." They smiled at the answer. Thank god. Your cousin, well at least this one, doesn't really ask as many questions. If it was your other cousins or any of your other family members, you would be genuinely fucked. Your parents prepared a room for you since you didn't like sharing rooms with your family & you enjoy your personal space. You unpacked your luggage & started make your temporary room more to your liking.

You went straight to bed after a long night with your family at dinner. You didn't really have the energy to do jack-shit so, you just flopped onto the bed & curled into a ball. However, you felt.. uncomfortable & goddamn this bed was so fucking cold. You got up from your bed to check if there was a heater anywhere.

There was! You turned it on &..! Uh.. it's warm I guess? It didn't really feel warm. Eh, maybe you should give it time to heat up & maybe the room will be finally warm. Well guess what my friend? It's been nearly 30 minutes & you've been staring at the ceiling in a cold ass room. You're genuinely pissed off.

You turned over to your side to look at the empty spot next to you. You missed him. You missed him so much but for his safety, you don't want anything terrible happening to him. Your thoughts were soon interrupted by your phone ringing.

Big Red is calling...

"Angel?" You heard his voice & the sound of something sizzling.

"Yeah, babe? You didn't burn down our house, did ya?" You raised your eyebrow.

"Oh, no no no. Everything is fine! Surprisingly. I'm starting to believe you have no trust in me, love." He laughed. "Oh, shit! Hells!" He hissed in pain.

You looked at your phone concerned. "You alright, babe?"

"Hmm. I'm fine. I just burned myself trying to flip my omelet with my hand." You stared at your phone like 'The fuck?' & you starting laughing. "What's so funny?"

"You." You smiled tiredly. "I'm glad that you called me. Speaking of which..., why did you call me?"

"Oh, I just wanted to check up on you. I kinda had a small feeling that you would be still awake. Ooh, Saffron!"

"A feeling?" You tilted your head.

"Well, you do really like my warmth. I assumed you would hard time sleeping without me." You tried so hard not to smile. You hated how much he was right. "I take that silence as a yes."

"No."

"You sure?"

"Fine. Yes, I am having hard time sleeping without you." You admitted & you huffed sadly. "I miss you, Bigs."

A short silence followed after. "You know, there's something I can do that can help you fall asleep."

"Yeah, what's that?" You asked.

"I've been watching those cooking asmrs that you like so much & I feel so mesmerized by it. It's like being put under a spell." He did jazz hands behind the phone. "I'm also cooking right now so, I was thinking it would be the perfect opportunity!"

"That sounds nice.." You heard Lucien opening the fridge & the sound of a bag crinkling.

"Now, should I throw in some bacon bits?"

•°♡ Charlie ♡°•

Charlie had to head home after a long night with you & you both had work tomorrow so, you both had to wrap up your little smooching session for the night. You both hated saying good-bye but, there was always something you both did that helped eased this pain. The magical thing called texting. God bless technology in this scenario, am I right?

Are you home yet?

almost casper

i left 5 minutes ago n' you already miss me?

Well, yeah. Is that a problem? 🤨

no no

i dont mind cas i think its just sweet

cause i miss you too 💛

I'm glad that we feel the same.

And love?

yea?

You are watching where you're going, right?

yea im fine y?

Good. Cause I don't want you to get hit by a car.

Because last time, you didn't watch where you were going and I had to save your ass from getting run over.

So, please don't almost die.

Again.

i would say no promises

but for you cas? i promise

I love you, Charlie.

i love you even more casper

You smiled at his last text. Jeez, you loved that boy very much & he loved you very much in return. You guys are practically inseparable ever since you both found eachother years later. The reason you both hated saying good-bye was because of the "What if?" questions. They would both plague your minds whenever you were apart.

What if something really bad happened to Charlie? What if you guys never spoke to eachother again? What if? 'Fuck that shit.' You thought as you laid in bed. 'Charlie is fine. I just texted him so, I know he's fine.' You tossed to the side. 'Everything is okay.' You closed your eyes & that was it for night.

...

Was it though? You're wide awake so, yeah that was not it for the night. The bed was uncomfortable as shit without Charlie but, you felt like you had to suck it up. You didn't want to come off as too needy & clingy. You hated that. What if that scares him off?

Then, the goddamn 'What If?' questions plagued your mind again. 'This fucking sucks.' You laid there. 'I wish he was here. If he was here maybe this shit would stop.' Ding! A notification from your phone. It would be wise to pick that up, ya know?

It was like if he heard your thoughts. It was a text from Charlie.

hey cas?

u still up?

Yeah, I am. What's up?

o nothin its just

i cant sleep

Me, neither. Lol.

wait y?

i thought u b sleepin by now

dont u have work tmr?

I should be asking you the same thing.

yea ur right

but u get up earlier than i do

I know.

I just fucking miss you, rn.

And I just feel..

So goddamn lonely.

I'm sorry.

There was a long pause after that message you've sent. Shit. You scared him off, didn't you? That was what you thought until.. Ding!

u don't have to b sorry cas

i miss u a lot too

how about this

we can get on a call

if ya want 2

I'd love to.

Charlie is calling...

"Cas?" It was Charlie.

"Yes, Chuckie?" Your voice sounded relieved but at the same time, tired out. Hearing Charlie's voice made you feel so much better.

"Are you doing okay?" He sounded concerned. "I saw the messages. Of course, I fucking did. Damn it, Charlie. Anyway, that don't matter. I just wanted to call you to help ya maybe?"

"I'm just-" You sighed. "I'm sorry." You placed your phone back down your drawer.

"That's the thing, Cas. Whatcha' sorry for? You didn't do anything wrong. Well, I hope ya didn't."

"I'm sorry for being so damn clingy. I was just worried that I scared you off or some shit." Charlie was taken aback by this.

"But you haven't been clingy? Like at all actually." Charlie paused to think for a moment. "Wait? Are you talking about earlier when you said ya missed after I left?"

"Yes." He heard the hurt in your voice.

"Casper." He said in a serious tone. "You checking up on me is not being clingy! It's very sweet of you that think about me & care about me. I care about you a lot too, Cas."

"So, I'm not being too much?" You asked.

"No. No, ya not." Charlie reassured. "If you were being too much, I would've let ya know. It's the whole point of boundaries! You set boundaries & I set boundaries but that don't mean that you're bad. It means that you're uncomfortable or I'm uncomfortable & we can improve on it."

"Life is all about improving & many people in my life helped me learned that. You helped me learned that, Cas." He says reassuringly. "You're amazing. So, don't be a jackass to yourself."

"Thank you, Charlie." You smiled. "Thank you so much."

"Anytime, Cas."

Then a silence followed after but you broke the quiet barrier.

"Hey, Chuckie?"

"Yeah, Cas?"

"Would it be okay if you could stay on call with me? Until I fall asleep?"

"Of course, Casper. Anything for you."

☆ミ Author's Notes Underneath 👇 ☆ミ

🩷 - Whoop! Whoop! Part 1 is done. Originally, I was going to make like the whole thing in one go but this is like collection of one shots into one post. I wanted to get this out before 2024 but you know, I had other plans. So expect Part 2 to come out next year technically since it's not gonna come out until 2024.

I was also trying something new & creative with this so expect this to not be good because it's probably ass but if you like it, I guess I did good. I tried my best & I'm glad I did.

[m0chaminx]

Sejanus Plinth | Whispers

*•.¸♡Request: Heyy Could you write a Sejanus Plinth x reader? Maybe some angst/comfort?

*•.¸♡Prompts: "We didn't all have happy childhoods, so sorry that I can't cope." "My childhood wasn't happy just because it wasn't yours. Yeah, I was safe, but I was alone and I never had no one to turn to. There's more than one way to fuck up a kid." from @promptsforthestrugglingauthor (its changed slightly tho)

*•.¸♡Warnings: Angsty as shit, Sejanus may be slightly ooc, bastards? (i think the capitol would hate bastards), the word whore in like a prostitute way, slight pacing issues (its 2am, ill edit it again later)

*•.¸♡Paring: Sejanus Plinth x GN!reader

*•.¸♡Summary: When District meets Capitol, a kind boy like Sejanus is born. When Capitol meets District, a messed-up kid like you is born.

Or

Sejanus learns you care just as much as him

*•.¸♡Words: 1.1k

The academy's echoing halls bore witness to a chorus of whispers that followed Sejanus like persistent shadows. He was neither oblivious to these whispers, nor stupid enough to engage. The students, wrapped in their Capitol privilege, money, status and style, often vocalised their prejudiced perceptions, casting Sejanus as the outsider—a boy from the districts, like a stain in the polished corridors of the elite.

Each comment carried the sting of disdain, a reminder that, in their eyes, he should have remained tethered to District 2. The snide comments echoed in the hallowed halls, questioning his nobility, his eloquence, his attire, and even his intellect. To them, he was an anomaly challenging the Capitol's rigid social hierarchy. Yet, Sejanus pressed on, his spirit unyielding, his kind heart and sweet words charming any who had escaped the whispers.

There had always been whispers about your mother and her flimsy beliefs with the Capitol. She was no one important to the Capitol’s government, systems of education or even associated with the Hunger Games. People whispered about her visit to the district and the child she returned with. Her marriage to a businessman, another individual largely unnoticed by the Capitol's discerning eye, provided no shield from the prying whispers. So, the whispers turned to taunts and the taunts fell to humiliation.

At every chance your classmates had, they would remind you of everything surrounding your family. Every grade that was slightly below perfect left you pointed at and laughed at with words so smooth the teachers with no concern for their students did nothing to stop it. Letters and threats were slipped into your books and bag, promises that even if you slightly smeared the reputation of the capitol would result in a bloody end. Yet still, you held your head high, but your mouth ran wild, insulting the students who stepped too far over the line.

It was only natural that a bond between you and Sejanus would blossom, and then grow stronger with each passing day. The insidious nature of the whispers, each with its unique twist, seemed to seep into the very air you both breathed. There was an acute awareness that, despite the bonds you were weaving, there was no fortress impervious enough to shield you from the relentless scrutiny of your peers that thought themselves better,

Yet, in defiance of the echoing gossip, you and Sejanus found solace in the simple acts of togetherness. The friendship grew to a point that simply knowing the other was there was enough to make the days bearable. Sitting closely in the classroom, sharing quiet moments during lunch, or merely walking side by side through the bustling halls became your only moments of peace. In the bubble you created, the whispers seemed to lose their cutting edge, despite the storms of constant judgement swirling around you.

But when Sejanus’s tribute Marcus, a boy he had been friends with had been strung up in the arena like a trophy or a warning, everything around him had collapsed at once. He grabbed his chair, throwing it and his desk across the room and he turned to the students and teachers, tears streaming down his face. “You’re monsters!” He screamed. “All of you!”

He stormed out of the hall, and you barely spared a glance at the screen before chasing him. He threw the doors open, storming down the hall and walking from the academy collapsing onto a stone wall. He screamed, tears streaming down his face. The courtyards were empty, the people shut themselves in their homes to watch the games.

You stopped by Sejanus, placing a hand on his shoulder and leaning to meet his eyes. “Janus…” Your voice was soft, as you called for him, but his tears continued to stream down his face. “I’m so sorry.” He straightened, trying to stop the shaking from consuming his body but he couldn't.

You wrapped your arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace as if trying to absorb every emotion that was consuming his body. His arms wound around you, as if simply holding you could wash away everything in the world. In your arms, nothing could hurt him.

Your mind scrambled to find any words that could comfort him, but you couldn't. Nothing you could say could make any of this alright.

“What can I do?” It was a weak attempt to help, but you couldn't do anything else. He knew that but somehow, a part of him thought you could fix everything. It was irrational but his mind wasn’t working properly.

“It’s gonna be okay,” you muttered.

They weren't the right words.

“How are you so calm?” Sejanus' words were harsher than he wanted them to be, and his quick movements to pull away didn't help.

You were stunned at the way he snapped at you and you stammered,

“I can't- I can’t fix it, Janus. I’m just trying to help.”

This time his anger was more purposeful, “No you’re trying to calm me down, like this isn't a big deal.” Sejanus shook his head, trying to keep his anger at bay. "We didn't all have Capital childhoods, so sorry that I can't cope."

You scoffed, your own anger rising. "Just because my childhood doesn't mean it wasn't bad. Yeah, I was safe, but I was alone, and I never had anyone to turn to. I don’t understand what you’re feeling, but I’m trying to help." Sejanus turned to you, and you shook your head, your voice raising, “Just because you live in the capitol doesn't make you capitol.”

“Are you bringing up the districts? Now?”

“You’re not capitol because once you were district, you're not capitol because you are kind,” Your voice shook, the anger leaving as Sejanus’s tense shoulders dropped. “You’re kind Janus. You care, and you hope. People in the capitol don’t see anyone else that way. Not people like us.”

You sighed and leaned against the stone wall. “You have status Sejanus; your father has money. You’re protected even though you don't know it.” Sejanus sat next to you, watching you closely as you played with the sleeves of your academy uniform. “My mother is a nobody capitol woman, and my father was a district whore. I was safe in the capitol, but not from them.” You turned back to gesture at the academy.

“I wasn't safe either,”

“It's different and you know it.”

“I’m not saying it isn't. I’m saying you’re not alone and… I’m always here for you.” He took your hand, intertwining your fingers. “There’s always someone on your side.”

Sejanus smiled, tears gathering in his eyes once again. “Thank you… for helping.”

“And someone on yours.” You looked around, making sure there was no one nearby. You shuffled closer to Sejanus, whispering to him. “When it gets dark, if you give one of the peacemakers enough money, they might let you in.” Sejanus turned to you; his eyebrows furrowed. “Pay your respects. It doesn't make it better, but- I, I don’t know what else.”

ﾟ°☆Page navigation

[runninriot]

inspired by the prompt Love is being able to say you’re sorry and mean it by @eyesofshinigami for @steddielovemonth day 23

sorry, not sorry

wc: 1688 | rated: t | tags: Robin Buckley is fed up with her idiot friends, Steve Harrington and Eddie Munson are oblivious and they’re bad at feelings, Love Confessions, Idiots to Lovers

„Why should I say sorry when he is the one acting weird. I didn’t do anything! It’s not my fault he doesn’t like me.” Steve looks at her, lips forming a bitchy pout, acting annoyed at her for bringing it up – like he really believes his own words and Robin is the one who just doesn’t get it.

Robin rolls her eyes.

God, she wants to strangle him sometimes. And Eddie, too. They are both so stupid, acting like they don’t like each other when everyone and their mother can see the longing looks they throw at each other whenever they are in the same room.

It’s been driving her mad.

They’ve been dancing around each other for weeks now, putting up fronts, acting like they just barely tolerate each other’s presence. Like they are forced to get along because of their mutual friends.

It’s bullshit. Sure, these two would’ve never met if it wasn’t for the little shitheads they both took under their wings (or maybe Dustin and his friends are actually the ones that took Eddie and Steve under theirs because the teens are clearly a lot more mature than these two idiots) but now that their worlds have collided, it’s so obvious that there is a connection between them neither wants to admit to.

   “You could’ve at least asked him to come?”

   “Robs, he didn’t even look at me when he came in earlier. What makes you think he wants to come to my place when he made it clear that he hates everything about the idea of spending time there?”

Steve is having a party on Saturday, invited everyone over, except for Eddie. Not because he purposely meant to exclude him but because Eddie’s been teasing him about it all week. Whenever Steve mentioned his plans, Eddie made a silly comment about how lame it sounds. ‘Bet the music will be all pop and no taste.’ – ‘Just beer? Come on, Harrington, grow up.’ – ‘Oh, a sleepover? Great! Are we gonna do pillow fights and face masks and all that fancy shit, too?’

Yeah, maybe Steve has a point. Eddie really didn’t make it seem like he wanted to be part of it. And it’s not really Steve’s fault for not understanding that Eddie is doing that out of self-protecting reasons. That he’d rather pretend to hate the idea of spending the night at Steve’s than having to live with the rejection of Steve not wanting him there in the first place. Steve is oblivious.

And obviously, Eddie is too.

And okay, Steve hasn’t exactly been showing Eddie that he cares for him either. Always pretends to be annoyed at him. Always bitching about the stupidest and most inane things like – ‘Yeah how about you grow up Mr Dungeon Master?! Aren’t you a little too old to keep playing games with teens?’ – ‘Jesus, Eddie, you know there’s a thing called hair brush one can use to tame that frizzy mop on your head?’ – ‘No thank you, I don’t want to be driving around in your van. That thing looks like it’s gonna fall apart any second.’

They’re constantly bickering and bantering, always so quick to be at each other’s throats. That is, until they think that no one is looking.

Because Steve actually loves to listen to Eddie talk when he’s leading the teens through a campaign, uses all these various voices to interpret the different characters he created.

And Robin just knows Steve’s finger itch to take care of Eddie’s unruly curls himself but he would never offer, would never say it out loud.

Robin can see the way Eddie’s gaze follows Steve around Family Video when he’s talking to her while Steve is attending to another customer – a sickly sweet smile on his lips, with eyes that are basically heart-shaped.

The way he blushes whenever Steve walks around shirtless and in his stupid, tiny shorts (ugh, men), tries and fails so hard every time not to stare with his mouth hanging open.

It’s like they’re both so desperately trying to convince themselves that they hate each other, when all of their stolen glances and hidden smiles keep giving them away.

   “You know how stubborn he is. I am pretty sure he would’ve said yes. But you didn’t ask and maybe now he thinks you don’t want him there. Did you think about that?”

Steve worries his bottom lip, looks like he’s contemplating what to say.

   “He hates me,” is all he offers and the sadness in his eyes breaks Robin’s heart.

-

   “Talk to him, Eddie.”

   “Pff, why should I? I’m not that desperate to attend some stupid party. What do you want me to say to him? Hey, sorry for making fun of you, could I maybe still get a pity invite so I don’t have to spend my Saturday alone and miserable while you’re all having a fun time? Yeah, no. Thanks.”

She’s gonna lose it with these two at some point. Robin has been trying. Beating around the bush, talking about that stupid party like it is the real problem just because neither Steve nor Eddie are ready to admit what it is really about.

   “What if I want you there. You’re my friend and I want to spend time with you too.”

   “I appreciate it, Bucks. I really do. And I love to hang out with you any time. But this is Steve’s party and if he doesn’t want me there, I have to accept it.”

She wants to shake him. Yell at him to drop the act and be fucking for real, just once.

   “Edward Albert Munson.”

The use of his full name has the desired effect of getting his full attention, eyes blown wide and his expression a mix of appalled and impressed.

   “Can you, for the love of anything that’s holy, stop pretending to be so above everything and just tell him already?!”

She knows it’s a little unfair to put that burden on Eddie when she could’ve told Steve the same. But she knows that between the two, Eddie will be easier to convince.

   “What are you talking about?” Eddie tries, but the blush on his cheeks tells her he knows exactly what she means.

   “You know what I’m talking about. I’m sick and tired of watching you guys pining for each other when you could’ve been making out for weeks now if you would just fucking talk.”

   “What?!” This time, Eddie seems genuinely stunned.

   “You two are perfect for each other. You’re both incredibly stupid and so far up your own asses, that you don’t see what you’re missing out on.”

She crosses her arms before her chest, suppresses the urge to smile triumphantly when she sees Eddie crumble as the realisation hits.

-

Steve is in the kitchen, preparing some snacks and drinks, when the doorbell rings. Everyone is already there, they’re all in the living room having a great time, so Steve thinks it might just be their pizza delivery.

   “Robs, can you get that?”

There’s no answer. Either she doesn’t hear him over the music or, more likely, she ignores him. Steve huffs, drops the bag of chips on the counter and goes to open the door.

He’s fumbling with his wallet, not even looking at the person standing on the bottom of his front steps, when a familiar voice gets his attention.

   “Hey, Steve.”

   “Eddie? What are you-“

Steve’s heart suddenly picks up speed when his eyes drift to Eddie’s lips, a small, shy smile tugging at the corners.

   “I wanted to apologize. I’ve been-“

   “No problem, man! I gotta say sorry, too. I should’ve just invited you and stop making such a big deal out of it.”

   “Not about- okay, yeah that too but- I’m sorry for being a dick. I’m sorry for- for not being honest with you. And I get that this not the best timing but a little bird told me to man up and-“

Steve’s mind is racing. He doesn’t have a clue where Eddie is going with this. Or maybe he does but he doesn’t want to hold up his hopes because surely, Eddie isn’t going to say what he wants him to.

   “I’m not sorry for making you feel like I don’t like you because the truth is, I don’t.”

Steve looks down at his own feet, needs a moment to process, a moment to breathe.

    Huh?

  “It’s more like, I’m totally gone for you, Steve. I want you in ways that scare me. I’m sorry for making you think I’m not head over heels in love with you and your stupid perfect hair and your annoying kindness and just... everything about you that’s had me losing sleep for weeks now.”

  “Oh.”

   “I’m sorry, Eddie,” he says when he looks back up, tries not to sound too excited because he feel like he deserves just a little revenge for the way Eddie phrased his earth shattering confession and nearly gave Steve a heart attack with it.

But then Eddie’s eyes fill with tears and there’s defeat written on his face and-

 No, that’s not what Steve wants.

   “I’m sorry for not doing this sooner.”

He surges forward, nearly misses a step when he flings himself at Eddie, wraps his arms around the other man’s neck and draws him into a kiss.

The kiss is desperate, full of regret for depriving himself of the wonderful feeling of Eddie’s plush lips on his. Dripping with want, spilling all the words he didn’t say, words he wants Eddie to know, to feel in every part of his body.

    I’m sorry for not telling you that I love you.

They are too caught up in the moment; too busy making out to notice Robin standing in the doorway, who came looking for Steve. There’s a huge smile on her face and she knows she’ll regret it because they will be insufferable together. But right now, all she is sorry for is not stepping in sooner.

Because they might be idiots but they’re her idiots and they deserve to be in love.

[instarsandcrime]

A Divine Comedy of Errors

Hey @zensations35, guess who? Your Ra//dio//App//le request is all done! We've got Sick!Seraphim!Lu/ci/fer and Worried!A/la/stor. I did my best to balance the silly, the hurt, the comfort, the snz, and the feels! And I chose the macro and monsterfucker parts because it is my personal responsibility to experiment with my writing and, in the process, make myself suffer at all times. 👍

This is a sequel to my previous fic Overworked and Under-Managed, but honestly it can also be a standalone thing too! Though I did sprinkle in a few romantic gestures this time for good luck! And like before, I'm working off another Sick//tember//2024 prompt. This time it's "taking a sick day".

Quick cw! There's also a little bit of mess and, although it's not much, I still wanted to give a heads up just in case!

Alright, that's all from me. Enjoy!

---

“This is stupid.”

“Now now, there’s no need to be so touchy, Your Majesty.” Alastor cautioned, peering over a shoulder at his pathetic patient. Pouting, fluffy nightrobe wrapped snugly around his shivering frame. One arm bunching up the warm collar around his neck, a tissue box tucked under another.

“Hey! You dragged me out of bed at three in the morning without explaining anything and now I’m- ugh!” Disgust twisted the demon king’s face as he kicked swamp sludge from a poor, unsuspecting duck slipper, “—wading through whatever this shit is in the middle of a bayou! I can be as– uff! touchy as I want to be!”

“Hah! If you actually chose to sleep rather than push yourself to the breaking point, maybe then you wouldn't be here spouting your grand excuses.”

”Well maybe it's because I suck at bed rest, okay?! Sure I've got the bed part down. That's simple! Easy! One quick hop and you're done! But the rest part? Nope. Nuh-uh. The second I close my eyes I feel a tickle. And when I feel a tickle I just know I'll cause some kind of chaos around the hotel. So it's my responsibility to keep myself under control in case I– ...in ca-case I...hih!" A pause. His nose twitched, breaths turning shallow. He couldn't help but groan in frustration as he ripped a cluster of tissues from his box to stifle painfully for the billionth time.

"Ht’chnx! Hn’chxt! H-hehhh–” Sneeze. In case he sneezed. Saints above was he sick of doing that. “Heh’TCHNX’hewww…ow."

“And what well-timed proof of your incompetence. I should be grateful, really.” Alastor grumbled, dusting the newly created pink glitter from his suit. 

“Oh shut…up…hhh–!” Before Lucifer could even lift a finger to suppress another possible fit, the other slid to his back. Squeaking in alarm when his arms were restrained by the crook of an elbow, spraying a fine mist straight into a gloved palm.

“Het’CHMPH! Guhhh…” Lucifer glared up at the looming demon, “Hey, what���s the big idea?!”

Alastor released his hold with a grimace, quickly disposing the near-soaked fabric into his shadow– followed by a spoonful of hand sanitizer. “Admittedly not very big, but certainly necessary.” 

“What do you mean by–”

“Ah, here we are.”

The Radio Demon surged forward, hooking a large fan of willow leaves with his cane to reveal a sudden clearing. Moss spread thickly across the plush, overgrown field, ripples peacefully lapping at the water’s edge. Fireflies hovered just above, hemming the murky surface with a soft, warm light. It was a breathtaking sight, and it made Lucifer pale entirely. Because now he knew what was happening.

And he hated it.

“Look, Alastor, I’m not going to lie. You're the worst. Your breath stinks like a rotting carcass. Every time you open your mouth all I hear is claws on a chalkboard. And Father forbid you get a few centuries of beauty sleep because wow you need a serious makeover.”

“Is there a point to all this, or are you asking me to push you into the swamp water? At this rate I’m inclined to choose the latter.”

“The point is! The point. Is. I can't ruin something like this. This bayou is precious to you. Louisiana is precious to you.”

“Oh, please. Have you forgotten who I am? I made this place, I could easily undo whatever meager scratches you cause.“

“But that’s—”

"Regardless, your creative powers leak through whether you like it or not. You might as well release it in a space that won't harm the hotel."

“I don’t– hehhh!”

“And no, you will not get stuck in your condition by 'letting yourself go.'” Alastor stressed, pinching the space between his eyes. “If I may speak freely Sire– this is ridiculous. You’re exhausted and ill beyond belief, and if you suppress one more magic-infested sneeze I will tie your hands to the ground myself. For God’s sake, the cure to your condition eluded me until you accidentally let the damn thing slip at dinner! So what, pray tell, is so beneath the King of Hell?"

”H-heh-aht’chhhh! I'm—ht’chnx!“

“Is the transformation painful?”

“N-nuhh– no– Aht’CHSHH!”

”Does it drive you mad beyond all belief?”

“No!” Lucifer wheezed out, “Focus! I’m trying to tell you thahhh…that…sonofahhhHATSCHH-‘TCH–’TSCHH’hhiew!”

But Alastor was not focused on his disjointed, half-assed reasoning. Nor the painful failures to bury his fit through the whistle of little fireworks that followed. No, Alastor was focused on the sight that briefly flickered behind his patient. It was for only a second-- a blink and anyone would miss it-- but it was there. There, and massive. And judging by the way Lucifer suddenly froze, he'd known the same. His stare fell to his feet, pulling back his collar to reveal a fracture in his porcelain skin. Holy light pierced through the growing cracks, and Alastor found himself squinting curiously at the sight– as if the true puppeteer of such a tiny doll didn’t satisfy the hunger enough.

“Ugh, forget it! You wihh…win…‘Etchhh!”

“Good.”

“Grea– snff!-- great!”

“A pleasure doing business with you.”

A pause.

“Well?”

“I, uh. I can't do it if you're watching.”

“Oh for God’s sake.”

“Look, do you want me to take this shit off or not?!” Lucifer spat, flames spouting from his lips.

"Phrasing, Your Majesty." Alastor sighed, begrudgingly turning his back. “Better?”

乃𝒆ţt𝐄𝓇.

The sinner nearly jumped in place. It was certainly a voice that rang out— or something along those lines. More of a chorus of pitches and concepts of tone. And yet they harmonized as one.

Ť𝑒𝔰丅ιℕ𝔾, Ｔεsting!  Well. At least the idiot’s mind remains intact. It would cause quite a scene if he had to drag the drama king kicking and screaming from another plane of existence. Whew! Okay, you can look now. But take it slow because hoo boy it is a  l o t. 

The Radio Demon decided to go as slowly as he pleased– with all the caution of a bull in a china shop. And all too quickly he chastised himself, holding a hand to his temple. Maybe, just maybe, the seraphim’s warning was not unfounded.

Though the pocket of home was designed to be near endless, his mind couldn't conceive the number of wings that crossed the metaphysical. They were still somehow boxed into such a wide universe, glancing around with eyes that decorated each feather like adorned jewels. Or so the sinner presumed before the memory continued to fade for another. In fact, the only tangible features he could possibly grasp at the moment were flowing robes and two small wings that wrapped around a near-featureless head like a blindfold. 

And yet the being could see perfectly, thin lips pulled into a frown, staring with-- ah. Alastor was just adjusting, but he could certainly recognize the overwhelming anxiety. The least surprising part that he did expect, of course, was his size. He didn't just crane over Alastor. He towered over him-- a far cry from the false shell he wore. Somehow, Alastor stuffed down a pang of petty anger that threatened to overtake him.

He'll lecture the idiot on giving him a proper fight later. 

Alastor? Are you alright? The ground trembled ever-so-slightly as the Saint slowly, carefully lowered himself. 

"I'm offended that you’d even ask." The caretaker took a small step back before hopping up on a folded knee, giving it a sympathetic pat-- earning an embarrassed flush that overtook fever.

Oh, thank goodness. I almost-- I... The wings around them flared, puffing at each desperate buildup. Quickly Lucifer drew a wavering finger in a circle to create a portal, grabbing a familiar crimson fabric before pitching into it. "ATSHHHHEWW! AHDT’SCHHHHEEWW! HATSCHHHHHIIEEEWW!"

Each shiver of ivory skin sent shockwaves through the flora below– and from above sent Alastor hurtling towards the reeds.

Shit, I-I can’t see you! Did you fall? Are you okay? Lucifer squeaked, infinite irises darting.

"Okay is certainly an overstatement, Sire. You nearly ruined my coat!" An offended huff brushed the seraphim’s ever-shaping ear and, once again, The Radio Demon was meticulously scanned. Paying no mind to the sudden attention in the shadowy nook of his patient’s shoulder, playing with a tuft of shimmering plumage.

Sorry! Don't know m'own strength. Lucifer’s large body hunched in on itself in shame, quickly pressing the makeshift tissue to the space where his nose should be– now golden-tipped with irritation– desperate not to sniffle too strongly.

"Is that my blanket." Alastor's smile sharpened.

I panicked okay?!

All too suddenly the complaints stopped. Time for the saint came to a standstill, and Alastor was barely able to wonder if that was a very literal metaphor before the cotton-knit carpet beneath him hiked up again. He quickly pinned himself to Lucifer’s neck, bracing for–

“ETCHH’CHHHHHF!” He doubled over again. S-sorry, sorry! I can’t help it! I’m trying to hold back but I cahh– can’t–huh-hgf! “ATSHH’HHHHHF! HUH’ATTKSHHHEWWWW!” Rrrgh, forget it! You should go be-before– hhhHHH!

Panicking, a multitude of palms weaved into being. Desperate to stifle again, quick to suffocate–

“Oh, please.” 

Black tentacles wrapped around countless wrists and yanked, pinning them and the seraphim to the ground. He cracked open a watery eye, strikingly bright with anger as he watched Alastor hop up on his cheek. When I break– “Snff!” –break free I swear I’ll–!

“Do what, might I ask? You’ve threatened my life a million times, what’s one more?” The Radio Demon teased, focusing on keeping his patient's poor, abused nose in his reality. He pointed his cane, lightly scratching along the rims of the nostrils as he spoke. “Poor, poor Lucifer Morningstar. Despite your constant objections, you’ve served Hell for so long. Haven’t you ever wondered what it’s like to bow to someone else’s power? Especially to such a lowly sinner like me?”

Ahhh— Alasto–or!

“So tell me, oh great and benevolent fallen saint, why should I stop now? It seems quite like a fair trade to me! I get to boss around one of the most powerful beings in existence, creator of light and the illumination of free will. And you, my dear, get to take a sick day.” And with that, he poked the very end of the tip. “Effective immediately.”

“GEHH’AHTSHHHH’HUUE! ATSHHHH! HAT’KSHHHHUUE! H-HAH-AHHH–! ETCH’TCHHHH’FFF!” The bayou rocked with thrashing waves and unearthed roots. For a moment the sky flashed to dawn, then dusk, before resuming its starry night. Wind whipped through Alastor’s hair followed by a gust of debris and dirt. A few raspy, heavy breaths and the chaos slowed to a stop. He peeked open one eye, then another. Finding himself safe in the eye of the storm, cradled in a soft flurry of wings pressed to the seraphim’s chest. 

Mnnn…bless m’be. Lucifer bit back a heavy sigh before he could cause anymore damage, shaking aside his chains before scooping Alastor up. Small scarlet eyes met large, weepy ones– blindfolds making way for a sea of silver and gold. And yet Alastor swore he could see constellations underneath their elegant surface.

“Well, that wasn’t so hard now was it?”

Thadd was cruel. The other whined. He flicked a wrist between congested sniffles, lacing a cotton cloth into existence. Obdnogxiously true. But still. Fugk you.

“Have you ever known me to be kind?” The sinner tilted his head curiously, ignoring a noseblow that bent the few trunks that remained, branches laying bare at their feet. “Honestly, it’s like you’re afraid of hurting–”

Every fibre in Lucifer’s existence tensed. In that moment, The Radio Demon was suddenly very aware of what the problem was from the beginning. And it was hilarious.

“Y-you! You–” He wheezed between a laughing fit, leaning on the base of a pointer for support, “You? You’re scared I’ll get hurt by you?! Hah! I’ve always taken you for a king, but a jester? Bravo, Sire! I haven't seen such a marvelous performance since the Iroquois Theatre Fire of 1903!” 

A gleam of moonlight brushed his vision. His giggling died down to find a crystal clear orb floating in the air. Another dancing around them. And another. All mingling with the night sky to reflect an aurora of colors. The eyes that had once remained hidden came into view, leaking droplets that never quite touched the earth.

And oh, Alastor realized. He’s crying. His ears wilted against his will, and adjusted himself accordingly to remedy the error. “I must admit, I never suspected an ancient being such as yourself was capable of fear.”

Of course I’m afraid! Lucifer curled into a tight ball, clouds slicing into ribbons as he brought all wings in on himself. Leaving Alastor stunned and alone, perched outside on a slightly shaky arm. Do you know how hard it was to show you this disgusting side of myself?

“Lucifer.” Alastor scolded back at the self-loathing a little too kindly for his liking.

Oh, don’t you Lucifer me! Sinners don't exactly like being reminded of Heaven. Especially the design of God's right hand. I must be a nightmare to you!

“And?”

A wing cracked open, thousands of surprised gazes peering back. Pardon?

“How does that apply to us?” Alastor arched an eyebrow. The fallen angel blinked, pearly tears unsticking from his crystalline lashes. A flustered heat rose to the wavering spots on his cheeks.

Alastor, I am literally Hell’s version of an atomic bomb.

“Mhm.”

I could kill you if I looked too hard. You could turn to ashes.

“Sounds exciting.”

Alastor!

“What was it you said just a second ago? ‘Don’t you Alastor me’? Honestly! I find it insulting that you would even question my strength, nor allow me the benefit of the doubt. Everything I’ve done up to this point, and further still, is by my design. If you ever hurt me, rest assured that I already knew the risks a thousand times over. Besides, recovering alone is incredibly unproductive. Take it from…my own personal experience.” Sharp claws tapped against the middle of his cane, “And besides, what would dear Charlie say if she saw you in such a state? Alone and helpless, losing control of his body? Poor thing would be worried out of her mind.”

…And you? Lucifer asked hopefully, the barrier between them cracking open a little more. Just a little more.

Alastor rocked on the back of his heels, bracing himself. “I suppose so.”

Finally the curtain parted, and Lucifer raised his hand to greet the other, leaning close with a soft, ethereal smile. Thank you I really–...r-really…

The telltale sign of a twitching nose. A hand rose to his face like clockwork. His caretaker opened his mouth to protest. But before he could, it moved instead to cup Alastor in a tight-knit shelter.

“HEH’ISHHHHUHHH! ISHHH’HUUUE! HH-HGHH-HUT’TTCHUUUE! ”

His wings snapped open at the force of every outburst, tree roots ripped from their homes and marigolds snapped at the stems. A billowing fog that spilled out turned from fire to dust and back, reshaping itself again and again until it settled on a light rain, creating puddles on the ground. And when twilight finally crept back into Alastor’s vision, Lucifer was sniffling thickly– unrestrained. Relaxed. Devoid of any concern or self-pity.

Briefly, Alastor wondered if this is how it felt to fly.

I cadd’t use your bladket, right? Do– “Snrfff!” Ugh, do we have more? He smiled sheepishly, holding up the sad pile of ash that once resembled a tissue.

“Pauvre ti bête! That sounded awful. I’ll see what I can do for your fever and nose.” Alastor hummed, signaling a small lift to press a kiss to his cheek. “And thank you for trusting me.”

[male-body-swap-lover]

Time Travel Christmas Part 3

*** This was supposed to be out before Christmas but then life happened***

Christmas in 2023. Once again, I am here for the 3rd time, 3rd body. Living the past 45 years in my son’s body, well my dad’s body, or really my body has been an interesting adventure. This time, life followed the timeline I created when I was in my grandfather’s body, Roger Braddock the 1st. So, I did better in college than my father ever did, and we had more money than my father had in the original timeline. I always had a nicer house than my father ever had when he was living his life. I did follow the original timeline and married my wonderful wife, who I guess is my mother. I never thought like that though. It was never weird. I still created my children. My daughter and my son, Roger Braddock the 3rd, aka me. It’s weird looking at yourself when you are a baby, but you aren’t yourself, you know. I know it doesn’t make sense. The same thing happened when I was in my father’s body. It’s been amazing to experience this timeline so many different ways. I probably should have spent some more time in the gym, but such is life. I was in my den preparing for the family coming over for Christmas and looked over at one of my favorite photos. It was me holding my son at our first Christmas together.

God how things have changed. Yes, I did better financially in this timeline. However, I had one screw up, and that was my son, aka my old life. I pushed my son so hard because I wanted him to do better in this timeline. I always did well when I was Roger Braddock the 3rd, but I wanted my son in this timeline to be a doctor. I always pushed him so hard and it all back fired on me. Whereas when I was Roger Braddock the 3rd, I got into business and always pushed myself. I was decently successful, but never amazing or rich. I wanted the world for my son and apparently, I made a mistake. Not only did he not become a doctor, he didn’t become a businessman. He became a slacker, didn’t graduate high school, and now lives in a trailer home jumping from one temp job to another. He mostly listens to country music, smokes, and drinks beer. I still love him, but my god, I am embarrassed to be his father. Hopefully I will stay in Roger Braddock the 2nd’s body and never jump back into my original body, or if I do, it’s in my original timeline.  I’m not going to think about that though. I have a quick minute so I am going to lie down for a nap before the family gets here.

Ah fuck, why does it smell like cigarette smoke in here. I’ve told my son he can’t smoke in my house. I open my eyes and I am not in my bedroom. I look around and realize that I am in my son’s trailer. OH SHIT! I feel my body and I realize I am no longer Roger Braddock the 2nd. I am now Roger Braddock the 3rd. Oh this is exactly what I didn’t want. I never wanted these raggedy ass clothes and this beard. Who would want to be a poor redneck that gets drunk all the time. Ugh, why does my head hurt so much. Fuck, I must have a hangover. Goddammit this fucking blows. Wait, why am I swearing so much. This isn’t fucking like me. This is just like my son.

Oh my God! I’m starting to gain all of his memories and lose my old memories; I mean my father’s memories. Why would I have my father’s memories. That’s weird. I hate my father. He’s the reason I turned out like this. Tried to push me to become a doctor. Fat chance of that shit happening! I’m too stupid for that. That’s why I live in this shithole, but it’s good enough for me. Beer, cigarettes, cable. What else does a man need. When I need a man, they are so ready to come here for me. Nothing like a bearded, dirty redneck to get these young men to do some really weird shit. Fuck I love my life. Guess it’s Christmas so have to go see the ole parents. Can’t wait to get into an argument with my dad about some shit. Better take a beer for the road. Maybe time to set up a Grindr date for after. Better light up before I go. This is the life!

[chemblrish]

Actually, you know what @onewigglyworm I will tell you all about quantum things - from a spectroscopist's point of view, of course.

Let me introduce you guys to

✨ the quantum numbers ✨

which describe the state of an electron in an atom. This will be long. Ready? Let's go!

I’m not going to begin with how the quantum theory came to be – it’s a genuinely fascinating story and I suppose it would fit in here nicely, but let’s be realistic: with my inability to shut the hell up this post is already going to be way too long as it is. So, let us find ourselves in the year of 1913 when the standard model of the atom was still Rutherford’s model: a dense clump of positive charge in the center and tiny particles of negative charge (electrons) orbiting it – a microscopic analogy of the Solar System with its large star in the middle and the planets orbiting it.

Rutherford wasn’t stupid and he wasn’t pulling things out of his ass (his scattering experiment? A thing of beauty!), but that model simply couldn’t be real. A moving charge creates an electromagnetic wave and therefore radiates energy which means our electron should begin spiraling towards the nucleus, making the atom an unstable system.

If Rutherford’s model was true, we wouldn’t be here to learn about the crazy wonders of our world, so let’s say THANK YOU!! to Niels Bohr who enters our story at the moment and flips Rutherford’s shit upside down.

Bohr made the following suggestion: “Hey, what if the macroscopic electrodynamics and microscopic electrodynamics were two totally different things?” He figured out that the energy of an atom is quantized – meaning it can’t have any possible value you can think of, but rather those values are discreet, they come in lil packets, and the energy of an electron depends on which orbit it occupies = how far from the nucleus it is.

This is where our first quantum number comes onto the stage: the principal quantum number n. The principal quantum number tells us which orbit our electron is on and therefore what energy it has. Let’s take a look at the periodic table and pick some element, any element – potassium, maybe? It’s in the fourth period which means its valence electron (the one that’s the farthest from the nucleus) occupies the fourth orbit which in turn means its principal quantum number equals 4 (n = 4). Easy, isn’t it!

That’s all cool and dandy but doesn’t solve all of our problems. Bohr’s model described the hydrogen atom perfectly, but failed to explain some of the phenomena related to… well. All the other elements (stop booing! Bohr’s model was a huge achievement at the time and it’s still a handy simplification to this day, even if it isn’t exactly correct).

Enter Sommerfeld. Sommerfeld thought, “Well, Bohr’s model isn’t bad, but what if the orbits of the electrons aren’t circular but actually elliptical?” That gave rise to the second quantum number: the azimuthal (or orbital angular momentum) quantum number l. You know those balloon-like models of the orbitals of an atom? I mean those:

[via]

This is where they come from! The shape of an orbital is determined by the quantum number l.

If we have a quantum number, then something should be quantized, right? In this case, that “something” is, predictably, orbital angular momentum (in very simple words: if a moving object has mass, then it has momentum, AKA how much will it hurt if someone throws an orange at you vs a watermelon. If said object is moving in a circle instead of a straight line, it has angular momentum). The quantum number l allows us to determine the angular momentum of an electron.

But Sommerfeld went further than that, because why come up with one quantum number when you can come up with two? He knew of what we call the Zeeman effect in which the emission spectrum of an element looks different in the presence of a magnetic field (more spectral lines appear than there are without a magnetic field) and he concluded that there has to be another quantized parameter – the orientation of the angular momentum. Come to think about it, it’s pretty crazy. Electrons don’t orbit the nucleus of their atom only “in two dimensions”, in a flat manner, like planets around their star; but their orbits aren’t scattered randomly all around the nucleus either – their positions are quantized. We describe those positions with the third quantum number – the magnetic quantum number m.

Obviously, this is a pretty big simplification – perhaps my physicist friends here will scoff at this explanation – but I think it’s good enough for the layperson who doesn’t necessarily want a lecture on vectors, dipoles, and precession.

Okay, so far so good. We have three quantum numbers, great job! We can now describe the state of an electron pretty well and all that’s left for us to do is to prove experimentally that we’re right and that the orientation of angular momentum is in fact quantized, and then we can all go home.

That’s exactly what Stern and Gerlach attempted to do. Again, I’m going to skip the details of the experiment (although I do encourage you to look into it yourself!), but the shortened version is as follows: Stern and Gerlach passed a beam of silver atoms through a non-uniform magnetic field, then observed the results on a screen on the other side. If the quantum theory was wrong and the orientation of angular momentum wasn’t quantized, then the screen should show a smooth projection of all possible orientations. If the quantum theory was right, the screen should show several lines corresponding to the quantized orientations of angular momentum.

So, we switch on the magnetic field, we fire the silver atoms, we take a good look at the screen… and we get two lines. Not a smooth distribution and not a handful of lines either but only two lines. What? Looks like there is some spatial quantization, but “regular” angular momentum isn’t what we’re looking at here.

The mystery was solved a couple of years later by Uhlenbeck and Goudsmit who suggested that, “Guys, what if electrons have some sort of inherent angular momentum that’s separate from their motion around the nucleus? We should call it ‘spin’, let’s call it ‘spin’, can we call it ‘spin’?” And so, we arrive at the fourth and final (wellll… final for this post) quantum number: the spin quantum number s.

If you've made it this far: whoa, congratulations! I had fun writing this, I hope you had fun reading it too.

I tried to make it as understandable to the random non-scientist as possible which naturally called for many simplifications and glossing over some details - I hope the quantum pros here will forgive me.

[confoundedluna]

got that until dawn ps3 version quote list for y'all Finally

it is Just as stupid and ridiculous as the final version and it deserves appreciation too - this post might be longer than the other actually since this version has more chapters, we shall see, and the characters seem to talk to themselves a lot, plus I want to call out More of the dialogue since it's lesser known overall compared to the final game

again, please note these aren't in any particular order, I think they're Mostly chronological per character, I just type them as they come up in the videos and the videos are a bit odd in the way the chapters play out (one video is like. chapters 1, 4 and 5, another is 1, 6 and 7, it's just too awkward to be flipping between videos to watch everything in full order), since a lot are incomplete or need multiple builds to showcase everything they can, but I put together a playlist that was Mostly the order the chapters should be in, including different versions of each chapter in case anything changed across the different builds that I might want to take note of

also please note that some of these i typed based off how the subtitles are written and some off of how the lines are delivered - some of them switch the word order or use like a shortened version of a word or whatever, some lines have dialogue that isn't properly subtitled or has an automated voice reading them rather than an actual actor's delivery, I'm sorry if it's inconsistent but that's just how it's gonna be, i might not notice which version of the quote I used but it's basically the same thing so deal with it lmao

and like last time, let me know if i missed or skipped anything you think should be on this list! I tried to be a bit conservative with how many lines I used and go for just the funniest stand out ones or the ones that carried over, either fully or partially, to the finished game

okay enough disclaimers and apologies and shit, on to the quotes!

CHRIS

(SAM: I thought you were dead!) Well that's a fine thing to say to someone.

Wow. Safety. My mind is blown.

A-ha! And here we have the mysterious graphite spray.

It is believed that seances derive their mystical power by channeling the kinetic energy created by nude bodies... gathered as offerings to the occult, particularly those of young, teenage women. Ghosts are typically not concerned with the nude bodies of pasty young men, so if there are any ladies present, would you please remove your shirts and pants-

I'm beginning to think our friendly ghost is dyslexic.

This isn't a video game, Ash! Not everything's a clue!

There's a place in France where the ladies don't wear pants... (ASHLEY: Oh my god, how old are you?)

(ASHLEY: Look at this! Isaiah 11:6!) Is that a baseball thing? Like the signs at games? (ASHLEY: Uh, no, Chris, it's a Bible thing. You know, like a verse?) Oh, that's what those are. We should read it, right? The baseball Bible thing?

(ASHLEY: Look at this lectern, there's all sorts of animals on it.) It's like Noah's ark. Or that channel with all the animals on it.

(ASHLEY: Yep, it's all here. Fire and brimstone.) Blah blah blah, obey all my commands, blah blah blah, kill all your sons and daughters! (ASHLEY: What Bible did you read?) The cool one, duh!

Hey, I got it! See how this rotates? We could line up the animals like it says in the verse! (ASHLEY: Maybe all those hours in Sunday school paid off.) Absolutely. Not.

This just got totally Indiana Jones on us...

I know the human body has a surprising amount of blood in it, but damn.

Someone's been hunting. Guess they don't need a freezer out here.

Alright, handles all around I guess...

Holy shitballs.

I gotta say, this is not the most sensible thing I've ever done in my life.

Maybe we can find the book that the page belongs to. And find the jerk who ripped it out.

(ASHLEY: What is this, chemistry class?) I don't know about you, Ash, but I always like to leave my dangerous chemicals in a food preparation area.

Phew! See, look at that, nothing out there but the wind. (STRANGER: Sometimes the wind is not to be trusted.) Yeah well you would say that wouldn't you...

Do we just seem like slabs of meat to them? Like in old cartoons when one guy would be starving and the other guy would suddenly turn into a T-Bone steak? (STRANGER: Your thoughts wander uncomfortably far for someone walking through the dark in the W's territory…) Well that's precisely why I'd rather think about cartoons...

Brrr it's so cold out here... I guess it's better being cold than dead... though if I get any colder I might wish I was dead...

No more psychos and saw blades and crazy TV rooms and weird skinny monsters and no more snow and no more screaming hunter dudes.

(ASHLEY: How are you holding up, Chris...?) Miraculously. I mean, I'll probably collapse the second I start to think about anything that's been going on. (SAM: Then don't think about it.)

Ash... Even if Jess was down there I don't think it would be a good idea for us to climb into a mysterious hole in the wall...

We just want to get through this. Together, Ash...

ASHLEY

(SAM: Do you think Em is gonna say something about all this?) Knowing Em... she's gonna say plenty...

I tried to join chess club but I wasn't cool enough.

Cannibalism?! Who would buy a book like that? Who would even write a book on cannibalism? (CHRIS: A cannibal...?)

I don't care what it is- why does he keep doing this to us?!

This is our fault... we can't save him, it's our fault!

Not cool. Not cool.

Where does an elevator even go down here?

Bats... I mean, how in the heck are bats down here?

'A week in the mountains' he said, 'we'll get drunk, it'll be fun'...

Ohhh, I hate creepy noises!

They're crazy if they think they're going to find Josh and the stupid key... (SAM: Emily seemed to think she had a pretty good idea of where to look...) Yeah but she's Emily, Sam! When does she ever do anything that isn't some sort of weird selfish game- (SAM: Em seemed pretty shaken up, Ash, she's just trying to help-) She's trying to get us killed. We're all going to die up here. All of us.

(SAM: Just keep going, Ash, just keep going. It's right ahead of us.) It so does not feel like it's right ahead of us.

You've seen Mike with a gun, he seems pretty confident...

Well Sam, there doesn't gotta be another way- I mean we can hope there's another way...

(SAM: Pull it open!) I'm trying! What are you doing?! Don't hurt yourself not helping!

SAM

Ah-yep... limbs are still working.

Bim bam boom! There, fixed it for you.

That was hellacious.

She's usually pretty cool. Seems more like she's nursing a massive crush. (CHRIS: You mean Mike?) Ummm... yeah? Come on, she's sitting out there like a little lost puppy waiting for him.

Is she really being that big of a bitch to him?

(CHRIS: Wicked Witch of the West.) Right? I wish someone would drop a house on her. (CHRIS: That was the Wicked Witch of the East.) Did you seriously just correct me on that?

I can't believe Emily is hooking up with Matt. Didn't really expect her to go full meathead after breaking up with Michael.

Hey, did you get the sense that Jess and Mike are gonna have a uh... 'political summit' on this trip...?

Josh... having a little trouble getting the key into the hole?

(JOSH: I know Sam... I'm sorry... my fingers feel like they're gonna break off...) Do you want me to warm your fingers up so you can get the lock open?

Hello...? Hey guys, is that you? What are you guys doing? Being creepy...?

Hey?! I'm getting a little creeped out here fellas...

Someone help me, I'm stuck in here with a maniac!

I guess Josh needs kind of like a 'time-out' after what he did to us, but...

Okay. That does it. Door is locked. Nothing in or out.

Are you crazy? Or just stupid? You go out there and you're dead. In here we can at least wait- (MIKE: Until what? Come on, Sam.) Until dawn.

(EMILY: How did you find us?) You were making a total ruckus. Emily, I'm not sure you got the memo about the stealth mission.

Perfect. A giant hole.

(EMILY: Be careful...) As opposed to...?

(EMILY: You having a good time up there, Sam?) It's a god damn party.

Don't scream- don't scream- don't scream- (EMILY: I can't help it, I can't-)

Empty. Could have been one of us in there...

Okay Mister Elevator, let's see what we're working with here...

Wow. Now that's more like it. This is baaaaaadass.

Come on already, where is that fricking code?

Come on girl. You'd look good with that in your hands. Don't be shy.

Hey... bout time I found the Big Boy firepower.

I am so done with this place.

Get me outta here. Gotta find the cable car.

Get me out of here. Just get me to the first floor.

I just want to be on the ground, not up here.

Stairs? Ladder? Elevator? Escalator? Just need to get down to the ground floor.

I need out. Find my way to the cable car.

Gotta find the ground floor.

You guys look starved. Let me just fire up the grill.

MIKE

All ye who enter must pay the toll! Take off your pants!

(CHRIS: Maybe I can get a signal long enough to download a manual for one of these things.) ...Nerd alert, amirite?

(CHRIS: Nature calls.) Did you give her my number?

You throw like a- (JESS: Don't say it!) Was just gonna say you throw like a- (JESS: Don't!) ...throw like a beautiful, enchanting woman!

Awww! That's one to show the grandkids, right? (JESS: Don't get ahead of yourself, mister.) I wouldn't dream of it.

You wanna hear a joke? (JESS: Sure! I love to laugh.) Okay. So, how many librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? (JESS: Dunno, how m-) Shhh!!! (JESS: Really? Ugh.)

(JESS: Goddamn batteries! Shake it, that usually helps! Awesome!) Shake-powered batteries? Who knew.

I wonder what's down there. Ah, I bet it's just a bunch of pickaxes and old cart tracks and miner bones and ghosts of miners, and miner curses and... Woah. Get a grip dude. Class President.

Look at that. (JESS: What're all those symbols?) I think they're ancient. (JESS: Ancient what?) Ancient symbols. (JESS: Such insight...)

I'm not super thrilled at the idea of bears hanging around and crashing our party.

Looks like the path is a little blocked up. (JESS: What do you mean?) Well, it's got all this... tree in the way.

Where'd you go? Jessica? You've got at least five good minutes left until I bring out the waterworks.

This looks like the work of a bear. I do not like the way bears work.

Jess, hon? I promise I totally won't murder you when I find you. Maybe just a little.

So cold out here, but I'm sweating! Is that normal?

(JESS: You're trying to just freak me out, aren't you?) What? Why? (JESS: To get in my pants.) Yes, I would like to scare the pants off you.

So... One time I jumped over a crazy deep ravine on my bike. All the kids from the neighbourhood came out. Some local news too. Everyone thought I wasn't going to make it. (JESS: But you did?) Nope. Totally died. Been dead six years now. (JESS: You're lying.) Am I, though? (JESS: ...yes? ... Right?) There's only one way to find out...!

We're all alone in here, babe. Just you and me... the Presidential suite. (JESS: Well, Mr President, the lights don't work. And I'm freezing!)

Someone really doesn't like things to stay in one piece around here. Why would someone tear this up?

My jaw's chiselled enough already, but still, it could be useful.

Well, I've found the killer bathtub. Jesus, what did I think would be in there?

Woah. Check out the crazy sex book they have up here.

What is this? Ms. Dunkle's tenth grade science project?

Well, we're here now, so we might as well make use of the amenities. (JESS: Like the bed?) Yeah, I'm thinking mostly the bed.

Alright, madame, is there anything else that you require, or shall I retire to my quarters? (JESS: You're not going anywhere.) Madame requires additional services? (JESS: I can think of a few.)

Huh. Turns out our monster is just a broken branch. Guess it must have seen us and gotten jealous.

(JESS: Finally I have your attention.) The Vice President is standing by. (JESS: Well, why don't you bring him into the Oval Office?) Let's sign this bill into law!

Gotta stay calm. Focused. Get out of this rotten pit.

Crap, what are you doing Mikey, what's wrong with you... this asshole killed Jess... he should pay for that... but nobody's gonna pay for anything unless you get out of here in one piece, buddy...

Stay cool, Mikey. Stay cool.

(groans) Unngh… Either I'm getting weaker or doors are getting heavier…

Come on Sir Mike. Don't be such a wimp. Think about Jessica.

He could be waiting for me… it would be wise for me to tread lightly in the lion's den.

Just stay on your guard Potus… Stay alert…

Let's go, Mikey, let's go.

Gravity's my co-pilot on this one.

Aww… god… smells like something died in here, came back to life, ate its own corpse and then threw it all up…

Well well well. Here we are again. Sometimes wandering around in circles ain't so bad.

This is the creepiest rehearsal space I've ever seen.

Alright, keep your head Mr. President. Calm under pressure…

Ah great, another scenic wing of 'le castle de dilapitacion'.

Alright… look at that. Now we're getting somewhere. Don't know where, but somewhere.

Births and deaths, 1905. Some light bedtime reading for when we get through this.

Man, I can't even skip lunch without becoming a hungry monster, how did these guys feel over 23 days. Wait, no, i don't want to think about it.

Hey! Proper old school photo. Ain't that many left that roll with this kind of geddup anymore.

Chris was killed right in front of us, Jack the monster hunter was torn to pieces and now we're just waiting around like sitting ducks? No. We have to get off the mountain. Now.

Boom! For the win.

(EMILY: Ugh. I hate this place.) Admittedly, they have let it go... (EMILY: Yeah, they haven't dusted in years down here...)

Ah, seems like patient number four was suffering from a bout of being too extraordinary.

I'll tell you what. If the patients weren't completely nuts when they checked in, this place would drive them crazy.

(EMILY: Alright, so how are we gonna get out of here?) Scream and cry like girls?

Pe-culiar? That's actually like a for real medical term? Must have been Charlie Cheswick's records.

I wonder how far your gums have to recede before they start measuring them. If I'm reading this right, this guy must have looked like a dollar store Halloween mask. Wouldn't want to meet these chompers in a dark alley. Or terrifying sanitorium.

If wishes were horses beggars would be cowboys. (CHRIS: Woah. You did not just say that.) That guy Jack had some pretty catchy phrases don't you think?

EMILY

(CHRIS: We just saw Jessica, down by the cable car.) Ugh. Any more perfume on that B and you'd think she was a bachelorette party.

My lips are already so chapped. (MATT: I can kiss them and make them better.) In your dreams Loverboy.

Oh my god, are you gonna swallow his face whole? We're all here! How much more of your crap can we take?

Listen you little slut, maybe because I am not on crack I can see what you're doing.

I don't have to spy when clearly you're showing off with your tongue halfway down his throat.

(JESS: You heard what I said.) Why don't you say it again to my face you bitch?

You do whatever you want. If there's a crazy murderer running around then I'm going to get the hell out of here. (MATT: Maybe he's right, Em-) Do you want me to go out there all alone, Matt? Because I will.

We'll take the cable car to go get help, dummy. Come on.

This is totally crazy Matt. This is totally crazy. My head is spinning.

Ugh. It's freezing out here. I did not pack for this.

I wish Chris and Ashley were more helpful. (MATT: Em, you hardly gave them a chance-) You know, I'm just trying to help the situation.

I just can't believe it's happened again! I mean like, is this family cursed? (MATT: Yeah the whole mountain feels cursed.)

Okay, you done good Matt. Took you a while, but you done good.

Look, if you're not gonna call for help, then maybe you should at least get some tunes going for us to listen to while we sit here and freeze to death can you please just get the radio working Matt oh my god oh my god!

Oh my God, stop talking like you're in a movie. Are you pushing the right button? Is there even a signal?

Wow. These clothes are all torn up. And I don't think it's because they were ripped off the sale rack in a shopping spree…

Ugh. Why do these machines always have to be so complicated?!

Ahhh! Jesus… them's the brakes.

Oh come on batteries… stick with me just a little longer…

Ugh… are those… bite marks on the bones? As in like… eating marks?

This is hell. That's all there is to it. Hell. I fell into hell and there are devils wandering around who will poke me with their forks.

Okay, keep quiet, Em. Put a lid on it. Don't want to attract attention...

Juuuust stay quiet... What would Princess Emilia do? I'll tell you what she'd do: she would stay quiet. Shhhh.

Wow. Good thing I checked my claustrophobia at the door. This is gonna be tight. I guess it's either through this little hole or turn around and face Mr Sunshine out there. Hmm. Excellent options!

I gotta try it. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right Miss A-student beauty queen and all around hottie?

Bingo! Done. Voila. QED. Hee haw. Locked and loaded. That is how we roll. You go girl. Aaaaannnnd... Cut it. Print it. Saved. Vamos!

Top...! It's the top! Mine top... tip top top of the mine...! No more shaft just... this place! I'm out of the mine! ...Back to the lodge! Back to the fires and warmth and friends! Oh little lodge, I missed you so much... how do I get out of here?

(MIKE: You locking us in?) I'm locking the baddies out. Can't be too careful. (MIKE: Glad you're sure the baddies are out there and not in here.) Feels good to lock a door...

(MIKE: Wow. I guess I totalled the place huh?) Mikey had a tantrum? (MIKE: When I commit to something, I like to do a thorough job.) Hmmmm. Don't remember you making heaven and earth move for me... (MIKE: Hey. Don't say that...) I'm kidding... You did okay... (MIKE: ...that's better...) ...considering the tool you have to work with... (MIKE: Easy! Easy!)

This whole wing just feels like it was for the real head cases. Right? Like the lost causes. (MIKE: Yeah. It's got a really pleasant vibe in here. Let's keep moving.)

Ew. Ew! His gums were receding?! Didn't he floss?! Some people just do not understand the importance of dental hygiene.

One order of W pâté, comin' up!

Wow, Sam, you're really getting all Rambo on us.

(SAM: Look. The machinery. If we can get those metal containers in a row... we can get across.) You're kidding, right? On those rusty... rust buckets out there?

(SAM: You got it! It's working!) That's right, 'cause I'm the mecha-master! (SAM: Now if we get them lined up... We can just hop right across!) Already on it, Rambo. Or should I say... Sam-bo. (SAM: Ah... no... I don't think you should say that.)

An elevator...! Probably broken. Why is everything on this goddamned mountain falling apart!

(SAM: Looks like we've got find a way across.) Score one for Captain Obvious.

(SAM: We've got one shot to get out of here and we can't screw it up.) Right back at ya, lady.

JESSICA

(CHRIS: What's Mike doing?) He's getting all of our stuff to the lodge. Nails. Just had 'em done.

(SAM: We can help you with the stuff.) Oh that's so nice! But... I kinda like it when Mike does it.

Ugh, finally we're out of that stupid wind. I was freezing my buns off out there. (MIKE: I can help you with those if you like...!)

(MATT: Come on Em, relax.) No, it's not okay Matt. That bitch is on crack or something.

Whatever. I don't have time for jealous bitches.

Fine. Whatever. Anything to get away from that whore. (EMILY: Are you kidding me? I'm the whore?)

Ugh, you know, I can't believe Emily sometimes... why is she such a royal B? How could you have ever gone out with someone like that?

(MIKE: Exiled.) More like sex-iled.

Come on troops, move out.

I wonder if they have any room service up at the cabin. I could so use a triple grande mocha cappuccino right now.

You lit up my night... Now all we need are some fireworks later...

How bout some jams? (MIKE: Whatever puts you in the mood.) This one might be my favourite... Until their next one comes out, then that'll probably be my favourite. (MIKE: That's a really good way of thinking about it.) Thanks! ... ...what?

(MIKE: Josh seemed pretty happy to get rid of us back there, didn't he?) Michael! I had no idea you had such a gossipy side... Is this the politician in you? (MIKE: Politician nothing; the guy's a dick!) Hmm.

I keep having this great thought, but then I keep forgetting it.

Somebody's going to owe me a new outfit.

(MIKE: I didn't know Hannah wore glasses.) Yeah. Just when she wasn't around any cute boys.

I wonder if they deliver take out up here. I mean right here.

Ugh. My shoes are getting so moist.

I wonder what's going on back at the lodge. Everybody's probably doin' it.

Nature's kinda gross.

Is that Orion's belt or is he just happy to see me?

Hah! I'm totally going to tell everyone about your fear of birdies.

Stand back, Debbie downer.

Don't worry, I'll save Woodsgate for the next election.

(MIKE: Some of these planks are pretty rickety.) You know what else is rickety? (MIKE: What?) Your face is rickety. (MIKE: That's a really good one!) Thank you!

(MIKE: Watch your step, Jess.) You know what? You're worse than my mom. My mom!

Boom! Sting like a butterfly and float like a bee.

Wow, look at that old photo. (MIKE: Must be an old mining team.) Looks like they really knew how to... handle themselves. (MIKE: Sounds like you wish you could handle them.) Looks really old. I wonder if they're all dead now. Ugh! So creepy!

(MIKE: Probably faulty wiring or something.) You've got faulty wiring.

Unless you want to make out with an ice sculpture, I suggest you get a fire going. Pronto.

It's so cold in here right now my tongue would get stuck to your flagpole.

I'm cold, I'm bored, and I'm getting rapidly less horny. You want to hurry it up with the fire?

(MIKE: It's so dusty.) No maid service up here? What a rip.

Coldness generally isn't conducive to hotness, Michael... Woah. That sounded, like, deep.

While you were trying to find the right button to push, I found some de-light-ful candles that wonderfully spice up the place and light up all the nooks and crannies... Far more cosy and accommodating, don't you think?

I can't lose my phone, my parents are gonna kill me! (MIKE: You can always get a new one!) That's like my fourth one this year.

Just unfasten it! (MIKE: I can get it! I can get it!) Don't send a man to do a woman's job.

Oh. Those perverted assholes. Why can't they just leave us alone and let us have a perfectly nice time? God! What jerks! (MIKE: Hey, they're just trying to have a good time.) Yeah? Well, so are we!

You guys are such dicks! Are you really that upset with me and Michael that you want to ruin our fun? Huh? Well, guess what? You can't ruin it! Because Michael and I are gonna screw! That's right! We're gonna have sex! And it's gonna be hot! So enjoy it! 'Cause I know we're going to! Ugh.

MATT

Ohhhh! She just got Emily'd!

Wow. Someone had a good time in here.

Why would someone leave a picture of keys where the keys should be?

This place can't just be a huge death trap, right? Cable car can't be the only way in and out of this joint.

Josh had a lot of problems... I think he just wanted to be able to sort things out... and put this all behind us...

So the joke I learned, it's really good, it's about like, a dude, who's got a haircut like the moon, and-

Coyote? Bear? ... Why is that okay?

C'mon, Matt... You don't wanna die down here.

The hell is that… Jessica? (JESS: Matt? Jesus… So it got you too.) Yeah… You okay? (JESS: Hardly...) Let's get the hell out of this place. Look! There! (JESS: Light!) That's the cable car station!

Come on, man... nearly there... nearly there...

JOSH/THE PSYCHO

Come on, lock... My lockpick skills are a little rusty...

This is the most boring break-in ever. You haven't even broken in yet.

Hey! Grit bin! Nice work moving that over here!

Everything all right in there? (CHRIS: Yeah, I'm fine. It's really dirty. And a little freaky.) Sounds like my kind of date! (CHRIS: Offf course it does.)

Dude, come on! Let's open this jawn!

Ahh-hahaha! Dude are you okay? That lil' wolverine almost gave you a paper cut!

(SAM: Hey, those things are known to be vicious sometimes.) Vicious to lil' babies. Lil' Chrissy babies.

(SAM: Thank you Chris.) Thaaaank you Chriiiiis.

Yo! Explorers! You guys are gonna need the keys for the love shack!

As you can see, your friend Josh is now in quite an unfortunate situation. If you wish to see him dead, then do nothing and you may watch him die.

Second... clue... picture if you will... high atop a powdery mountain... the only place possible for a jacked up jock like Matthew to score a... 'big break'...

If you'll please now direct your attention towards the main attraction...

Not much time left before your friend is... perforated...

Congratulations! You've just bought yourself... more time... to watch your friend die...

My my my, didn't you do well! You fought the system and you've won. And what you've won is a prize! You're a lucky winner, come on down!

Well, that's the end, folks. I only wish it could have turned out differently, but, unfortunately, I'm still going to kill your friend because, hey - winners don't play by the rules!

Allow me to introduce myself, I am your host!

Oh, I had fun with them... and now I'll have fun with you... There's nothing wrong with having a little fun, is there?

Samantha, my darling, I don't think your friends are going to help you... I've already had a little fun with them...

Oh what a delight it was watching his life drain away. I wonder if watching yours will be just as fun.

(SAM: What do you want?) I just want a little fun, Sam... so why don't we... mix things up a little... You can have ten seconds to pretend like you're escaping... and then you're dead!

Go on, hide if you like... I know just where you are.

(CHRIS: What do you want from us?!) Well now, Mr Chris... I think you've got the answer right there in front of you.

Oh borrring... You think I didn't bulletproof my machinery?

(CHRIS: You're sick!) Heh heh heh... why thank you, kind sir... but the choice... is yours... play ball!

I'm sorry... so sorry... it's all my fault...

THE STRANGER

It would be wise for you to hear me out.

You seem to listen but not to hear.

You have no chance out there on your own- (CHRIS: I'll just have to take my chances.) Then I'll go with you. Alone would be suicide. (CHRIS: Yeah well you're so special.) I am... experienced.

You do not seem too concerned with saving the life of your friend.

(CHRIS: Have you done this before?) Have I foolishly attempted to free a dead man in the hopes of becoming one myself? (CHRIS: Uh...) You ask questions that are not very useful. (CHRIS: My teachers say the same thing. But yeah, so, have you?) This is not my first barbecue.

He who seeks avoidance finds out what he seeks to avoid. (CHRIS: That's... a really confusing saying.)

[windrush-child]

You’re right for me, Ecstasy (one shot)

Reader x Lewis. 3.4k words. Smut.

Lewis Hamilton falls for a grid girl. Things don’t go well. Luckily, fate has a fable for second chances. Unreliable narrator cuz we’re messy like that. Thanks for the prompt ideas anons. Title inspired by the weeknd’s Don’t Break My Heart.

Warnings - Hate sex and highly questionable morals.

Rio de Janeiro. A mild November day. When you see him standing in the middle of the street, you have to do a double take. The tray with empty mugs nearly slips from your hands as the realisation hits. He caught your eye as soon as he turned round the corner with his friends (or security guards, maybe?), chatting in a language that seems so out of place. The simple black turtleneck and jeans make him look almost inconspicuous, if it weren't for the delicate pearl necklace that rests on top of his collarbones. Few people would know he's a famed racing driver if they ran into him on any random weekday like this. The worst thing, though? He saw you, too. He's also stopped talking to his friends, peeking over as if he's thinking, is it really her?, reluctant. And now, he's walking over. Shit. It feels like your feet have frozen to the ground. This can't be real. What the hell is he doing up here, out of all bloody places in the world? How did he, nearly one year down the line, end up in front of the small, unassuming Café you work at, in a small, unassuming backstreet of Santa Teresa?

"Hey" Begrudgingly, you look up. Big, brown eyes before you, a cautious smile, and the familiar smell of his cologne which strikes you in the most painful way possible. Where has your voice gone? "Good morning," you say, dryly, trying to sound like he's just another customer on just another day. Hoping he can't hear how he's sucker-punched the air out of you with only a word. Lewis shifts from one foot to the other. "I wasn't sure whether it was you at first," he says, attempting half a smile. You can feel his gaze all over your skin. "It's, uhm.. it's good to see you again. How've you been?" You press your lips together, can't bring yourself to say the same. "I'm doing alright," you respond, slowly wiping the table surface so you don't have to look him in the eye. Lewis draws in a breath. "Do you work at this place?" he asks. What a stupid question. "Looks like it," you answer, dumping the rag on the tray. You should be taking your lunch break right now, can't really pretend to be busy either when there's just a single old man at a table in the corner. "I've been working here for most of the semester. Money's tight, you know." "Right." He nods to himself, eyes on the ground before he looks back up. "So... you're still at university, then?" he adds, a graceless attempt at small talk. It's so unlike him to be this clumsy, it almost catches you off guard. You grab the pack of cigarrettes from the counter behind you when you're done cleaning up, pull one out and stick it between your lips. "I am," you mumble as you step further out into the street, desperate to create a safe distance between you and the man. He shoudn't be here. You shouldn't be talking to him. "What are you doing up here, anyway?" you ask as you light the cig. "Oh, you know, different things." he starts, "A friend is showing me around some places in the city today. And I also have a race on Sunday." "Busy as ever," you interrupt, a hint of bitterness in your voice that you hope went over his head. Don't start, now. Lewis makes an Mhm sound, both hands in the pockets of his trousers as if he doesn't know what else to do with them. "I thought you stopped?" he says, offhandedly. It takes you a moment to realise he's looking at the cigarette between your fingers. You could take this as an attempt to have a normal, non-threatening conversation. A first, cautious step into mending the broken pieces of your whatever-ship. You could ask him an equally innocuous question, or just make up an excuse to get out of the situation. You choose to be petty instead. "So what?" you shrug, blowing smoke. "It's not your business, really." Lewis rolls his lips, looks like he wants to chuckle. "I see." Just when you think he'll finally leave, he hesitates once more. "By the way," he says, "They're still looking for personel at the circuit in São Paulo, for the evenings and such. From what I've heard, they pay very well." You take a long drag of your cigarette. Seems like Lewis hasn't forgotten your career as a grid girl back then. And how could he have? It's the only reason your paths ever crossed.

"Thanks for the tip," you say. Your eyes linger on his back for far too long as he walks away.

—-

São Paulo, Race Day.

You had sworn to yourself that last year was the last time you're doing this. That the glitz and glamour of Formula 1 just wasn't for you. Too many ruthless, absurdly rich men who believed the world belonged to them; and that anything was possible if you just named a price. But when you met Lewis, one fateful evening after a race, he'd seemed like an exception to the rule. He was kind. Didn't treat you like a consumable that was hired for the sole purpose of his entertainment. Most people, even those close to you, would secretly judge you and the other women for "looking pretty for the cash". But Lewis never did. He understood that money didn't grow on trees, and that this was just a means to an end. It was part of the reason why having sex with him felt so liberating, so mindblowing every time. With him, you could be careless, didn't have to worry about the potential stigma. It was the type of sex that would make you cuss and sweat; that had you crying out into the bedsheet while he gave it to you good. The kind that had you holding on to each other for the entire night, and say things that should've never been said out loud. It escalated from a one night stand to two, then countless more when he flew you out to Mexico and COTA the following weeks. Neither of you dared to put a label on it, though, not even when Lewis had made a habit of treating you to dinner on Sundays; not even after the occasional pregnancy scare that turned out to be a false alarm. You were just a grid girl, after all. It was what doomed your little romance to failure in the end. Lewis couldn't handle his jealousy, couldn't stand seeing you around men that weren't him, yet wouldn't commit to you either. Maybe he didn't have the guts to do it. Maybe he lacked respect, and you were just a toy for him to play with till he got bored. In the end, none of it mattered.

The pay is indeed good, you think as you stow the bundle of cash into your bag at the end of the day. One of the other girls, Magalenha is her name, had convinced you earlier to come dancing with her at the after party by the track. The semester has been very draining, so why not have a bit of carefree fun for once? A shower, fresh make up, and a backless sundress is all you need to feel like the night is yours for the taking. Your newly found friend decides you're having a Cosmopolitan, giggles with you as she points at people that clearly can't dance, and three drinks in, she even manages to snap a selfie with a wasted McLaren engineer.

Fate can be such a bitch, however. You're waiting for your Caipirinha at the bar when you spot him on a dance floor. It's the time of the night when the beats get deeper, heavier, and hotter - You can tell. Through the low, purple lights and the haze of liquor in your body, you watch Lewis' tattooed hands, how they slide over a woman's waist from behind, down to her lower back as she grinds on him to the rhythm of the song. He's breathing hard, sweat pearling on his forehead as he pulls her closer by the hips. She smiles when he seems to whisper something into her ear. You turn away. Blood-red in the face. He has to be drunk; disgustingly, shamelessly drunk. When you look up again, just to put the sharp blade to your heart once more, Lewis is staring back at you. Your head is spinning as you dash for the exit of the venue, as quickly as your high heels allow, desperately trying to make yourself believe that this has got nothing to do with him. You're simply walking, no, running back to your hotel because it's time to call it a night - the shameful rush of jealousy isn't real at all, and neither is the bitter ache in your stomach.

"Stop!" Lewis' voice carries through the street, but you keep your eyes straight to the pavement. "Will you hold on!" he says as he catches up to you, trying to grasp your elbow. You smack his hand away. "What, Lewis?" you snap. The venom in your voice nearly makes him jump. "Just leave it, okay? You're causing a fucking scene." To your misfortune, Lewis doesn't listen. "I didn't know you were at the party," he blurts out, almost stumbling over the words. "I didn't do it on purpose, I swear-" You're silently gnashing your teeth as you turn to him, glaring his stupid face up and down. "Fuck- Come here," you say, dragging him along by the fabric of his shirt, through the doors of the hotel lobby. Nobody needs to see you fighting it out on the street. Surprisingly, he follows without protest. Only when the door of your room falls shut with a loud bang, you let go of him. "Alright," you start, tossing your purse to the floor. "Say what you gotta to say, then!" Lewis sighs, runs a hand over his face. He should've drunk less. "It's not... look, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings earlier, but-" "You're not hurting my feelings," you scoff, angrily kicking off your heels. "It's been a year, Lewis. I couldn't care less about who you're fucking tonight." He's frowning at first, but then raises his brows. "Oh, you don't care at all?" he says. You don't like that tone in his voice. "Is that why you can't even talk to me normally? You've been ignoring my phone calls for months. Every single message, too." Suddenly, your blood pressure spikes. "So you show up at my job in Rio because you can't take a hint?" you blurt out, impulsively lunging closer. The man has gone completely mad; there's no other way. "Why would you even want to talk to me? You've made it more than clear I wasn't your type." you spit, pure contempt. Lewis huffs, shaking his head in disbelief. "You know damn well it was never about that." He's trying to sound calm now, but by the tremble in his voice, you can tell the anger is finally getting to him. "You may not have said it-" you return, bluntly pointing a finger at his chest, "But we both know you thought it. You want a good girl, don't you, Lewis? No way you could ever love someone that's beneath you." "Bullshit," he hisses as he grabs your wrist hard, pulls you so close that you see the livid flicker in his eyes. It's almost satisfying. "You were the one that bailed on me 'cause you were scared of your own feelings. You rather kept sleeping around instead of committing to this," Lewis says. You're going to smack him in the face. "Or did you conveniently forget that?" There's hot bile rising in your throat, the awful feeling of knowing he's right. You want to scream at him, call him a stupid asshole. "Because you never even wanted me in the first place!" you yell. "That is not true!" "Then fucking prove it!"

There's silence, until something changes in Lewis' face. All of a sudden, the air inside this room feels too thick. Too warm. He's breathing hard. "Take your dress off," he says. You can feel the rumble of his voice in the pits of your belly - It short-circuits something inside of you. Fuck. You do it. Clammy hands, shaking knees as you peel yourself out of your clothes, skin hot from wrath, but even hotter from the way Lewis is staring you down. When he grabs you by your hips, pulling you into him, your heart stumbles. There's no warning when Lewis pounces on you, lifts your body easily to throw you onto the bed with him. It's not a fair fight, never was as he pins you down under his weight, making you squeal when he wraps a big hand around the base of your throat. "You want me to show you, huh?" he growls and charges at your mouth. You should bite his lip until you draw blood when he kisses you, make him regret ever starting this. Instead, you're moaning as he licks into you, wet and rough and messy, can't stop yourself from grinding up into his body. Oh, he's driving you mad, knows it too when he presses his palm over the soaked spot on your panties. "Shit," he curses when he pulls away, gets his fingers slick as he slips them into your underwear and inside of you, a filthy noise. "Just can't help it, can you?" he taunts, makes you whine when he pushes up into a spot, then again when he suddenly pulls them out. "Fuck you," you say, and Lewis laughs, because there's no bite behind it at all. With how ready you are for him, he knows he's got you in the palm of his hand.

He makes short work of your panties and tosses them to the floor, followed by his own shirt, before you're getting up on your knees to unbuckle his belt. As he stands at the edge of the bed, watching your every move, you make sure to dig your nails into the soft skin of his groin while you're tugging at his briefs. Lewis hisses, a threat of white, sharp teeth. "Behave," he warns, has grabbed a fistful of your curls to get his point across. His cock feels warm and thick as you're holding him in your hand, hardened up and reddened at the tip. By instinct, you wrap your lips around the head, impatiently trying to swallow, whimpering when he hits the back of your throat, too heavy, too big. Lewis controls the pace, pulls you back and forth by your hair, till spit is dripping down your chin, the taste of his arousal pooling on your tongue. Fuck, this is obscene. One more time he takes you, so far down himself that tears prickle in the corners of your eyes, until he pulls out with a harsh groan, wet and throbbing. Lewis tugs at your hair, angles you up so you're looking at him, don't have the choice not to, bulging, strong arms around your body holding you up into his chest, as if to make sure you won't slip away. If someone cut this moment out of marble, right here and now, you'd look like a sculpture of the Renaissance. Such beauty in being at his mercy. His gaze roams over your face, considering you with utmost diligence, the mess on your lips, the heaving breaths you're taking. Under the scrutiny of his eyes, your skin feels like it might burn off. "Have you been sleeping with other men?" "No," you answer, voice thin. It's the truth. He exhales, chest moving with it. "Good," he says.

Lewis sweeps you off your knees, lays you on your back with smooth strength. You want to be ashamed of how easily your legs open for him; of how you grab and pull at his shoulders. But you can't bring yourself to be, not tonight. Your eyes are shut tight when he clutches your hip with one, the base of your throat with the other hand, a cruel, anticipating throb where he lines himself up with your entrance. When he pushes in, you cry out, the stretch blind-siding, too tight. You can feel him everywhere, all at once, gasping when he presses deeper, till he's buried up inside. "Mhm...fuck," you whimper, don't remember him feeling like this. You look up to find Lewis watching you, gaze flickering back and forth between your trembling lips and liquid eyes. He's taking deep, ragged breaths, stays still. "Are you okay?" he asks, voice rough with exertion. He feels like he's going to burst, a tight, hard knot low in his belly. "Yeah…yes, I am" you sigh, reaching out so you can wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down and close, and he lets you. He starts rolling his hips into yours, fucks you slowly and thoroughly, makes you fall apart underneath him. The room fills with moans and the sound of your bodies meeting as he takes you, heavy, practiced strokes. Every nerve of yours feels overstimulated with him, with his smell, the strength in his body. You want to cry, tell him you're sorry for breaking his heart, want him to say he's sorry for breaking yours, too, but can't grasp a single thought, not when he's doing this to you. "Oh god, I-" you whimper, but Lewis feels it before you do, is picking up a punishing pace. "I know, sweetie, you’re doing so well…" he purrs, has you crying out when he changes his angle, hits those places deep inside till you're taken by the throbbing heat between your legs. Lewis presses his mouth into your neck as he fucks you through it, has to fight tooth and nail to hold back because he knows he'll be in trouble if he doesn't, straining hard to not lose himself in you. It's almost too late when he pulls out, barely in time, his vision whited out from pleasure as he spills warm and wet on your belly. Lewis is panting and cursing while he pulses against the hinge of your hip, arms threatening to give out under him, baring his teeth. You don't think you've ever seen him come this hard.

"Fuck," he sighs, says it again, shoulders heaving as he leans back on his heels. He looks out of his mind, holding on to your thigh, can't do a single thing except to feel you under his palm. You're watching him in silence, because you don't know what to say.

Lewis does get up, eventually. But only to fetch a washcloth from the bathroom, and to pour some warm water on it. You're relieved when you see him come back to bed, worried for a moment he'd just get dressed and leave without another word. Instead, he's cleaning you, slowly running the cloth over your skin, starts with your face, then your neck, down to your belly to wipe away the mess he’s made. It's heart wrenching, how mindful and gentle he is with it, like this is still a part of it all, an act of aftercare. You wish he'd never stop.

When Lewis is done, he sits still. "We shouldn't," he begins, but trails off again. "I don't care," you say, shaking your head. "I don't care." It bursts out of you right then, can't help but reach out for his face, fingers in his beard, and then you're kissing him, deep and sincere as you pour it all out into his lips. "I'm sorry," you blurt out. "I'm so sorry that I lied to you. I'm sorry that I ran away." It's starting to sound like a prayer now, the way you're whispering against his lips, a dying, pleading flame that hopes he can forgive you. Lewis looks at you, his face in your hands. His dark brown eyes, so harsh and unforgiving earlier, have gone so soft. He leans in and presses a lingering kiss to your lips. Vulnerable. "I know. It's okay," Lewis whispers, doesn't have to think twice about it. He'd give you the shirt off his back had you asked for it, knows it in his heart. "I’m sorry I didn't treat you like I should have," he says, "I'll make it up to you, I promise."

You give him your lips, your tongue, let your hands slip into his hair and down his neck as you kiss him the way he loves it. Lewis is intoxicating, the most potent drug in the universe. He's tasting you with such devotion, slow licks of his tongue, moaning low into the kiss, almost sounds like he's hurting. Don't break my heart again.

[cacoetheswriting]

pearl: august 1984

pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader word count: 2k chapter summary: goodbyes are always hard. and as eddie comes to learn, they're especially hard when they happen with a person you love.

content warnings: best friends to lovers, slow burn, mutual pining, suggestive & mature themes, adult language, angsty, hard goodbyes, self-doubt / insecurities, mentions of recreational drug use, use of pet names - if i missed anything, pls let me know!

The day Eddie had been dreading for months has finally arrived.

His best friend was leaving to start an adventure in college and she was doing so… without him. 

He really shouldn’t be this upset, after all, he’d been anticipating this moment ever since the two of you found out he wouldn’t get passable grades. But as he watched you pack the rest of the boxes into your parents car, his heart ached. It was suddenly all too real.

The two of you spent the entire summer trying to knock off as many items as you possibly could off a spontaneous bucket list you once came up with while high. From camping in the woods, then watching the sunset and sunrise together, randomly putting up Christmas decorations in July (the trailer looked like something out of a holiday special, for which Wayne almost killed you both), to even getting small matching tattoos — your initials on the inside of your right pinkies. The two of you completed every ridiculous thing on that list and honestly had the time of your lives while doing so. 

“We should come up with a new list for next summer,” you muse, sitting with your legs dangling off the edge of the roof of your parents house.

Eddie smirks. He’s next to you, laying down and looking up at the cotton-candy clouds above as he gently rubs his hand on the bare skin of your lower back in a circular motion. The two of you had been in this position for the last twenty minutes, talking about nothing and everything all at once. And Eddie’s not a religious person by any means, but he thinks this is what heaven must feel like. He’s sure of it, actually.

“Maybe we could go on a mini road trip? Hm?” You continue, glancing back at your best friend's relaxed frame. “Celebrate you graduating in style, in New Orleans, as opposed to the stupid Hideout. What do you think?”

He smiles at the thought. He smiles at the fact you’re actually planning to still be in his life next year, never mind going on a trip together, despite your clear ability to make friends anywhere you go. Then, because of the same exact reason, his smile falters and he sits up slightly, propping himself up on his forearms before tilting his head as he looks at you.

“What if you meet someone new?” Eddie ponders and although the tone of his voice is teasing, the expression on his face is filled with worry. “You’re not gonna want to celebrate my delayed High School graduation when you could be goin’ on some fancy trip with your fancy college friends.”

You roll your eyes then lay backwards, leaning against his side. “Why would I want to make new friends when the one I have now provides me with enough dramatics?”

The tease earns you a melodic chuckle and a poke to your ribcage. 

“Ha!” Eddie mocks, “You’re hilarious.”

“And you’re being stupid, so just agree to the New Orleans plan and shut up ‘cause all I’m tryin’ to do is have another perfect summer.”

Eddie huffs lightheartedly before laying back down, one arm now around your shoulder, holding you close. The giggles die down slowly and he lets out a content sigh.

“Shit, princess. I gotta be honest, I don’t think we’ll be able to create anything nearly as perfect as this.”

And for Eddie, it really was the perfect summer with the perfect girl. His girl.

Unfortunately for him, his girl was playing tetris with her belongings, making sure it all fit in the boot of the car, as he watched with a sullen look on his face because you weren't really his and this would be the last time you two saw each other at least until Thanksgiving.

Eddie realised his feelings for you developed into something he wasn’t used to after that afternoon in the back of his van, back in March, when he sang Me and Bobby McGee to you. Ever since then, he had tried to navigate around this unforeseen situation and later, the last few weeks to be exact, he even tried to tell you how he felt on numerous different occasions. Well, actually, tried is a strong word. 

The correct expression would be he thought about telling you, but every time the moment felt somewhat right, he chickened out. His insecurities got the better of him because what if he didn’t really like you in a romantic way, just made himself believe that he did since you were leaving and his mind was selfishly trying to convince him professing his feelings would get you to stay. Or worse. He was scared to be honest ‘cause what if you didn’t feel the same way and he just flushed years of friendship down the drain.

But right this second, despite all perceived consequences and scenarios he replayed in his head on loop, Eddie was full of regret. He should have been honest with you since, at the end of the day, it didn’t matter if you liked him back ‘cause he’d remain your friend regardless. You, your friendship, meant more to him than any potential relationship.

“Eds,” you hail him back to reality, “Can you be a gentleman and help me with my last suitcases? They’re all that’s left in my room.”

He nods, plastering a fake smile on his face, and follows you inside. 

The once colourfully decorated bedroom, your safe space as well as his, was now pretty much empty. Everything was gone, aside from permanent pieces of furniture, random posters, awards for different high school accomplishments, and knick knacks you thought were too childish for college.

You point to the suitcases you would like for him to take, but Eddie's distracted. His eyes are darting around the space. He's remembering where things used to be and all the memories associated with them, and he seriously thinks there’s nothing left to do but break down.

“Eddie,” you say in a soft tone, standing in front of him, “Are you okay?”

All he can do is shake his head. The action, albeit small, was enough for you to drop the bag you were holding and wrap your arms around him.

The hug is intense yet gentle all at the same time. You rest the palms of your hands on his back as he lifts his own arms to hold you in place by your waist, grip tightening with every passing second. And he’s a complete goner. Head over heels. I think I like you as more than just my best friend, he thinks to himself and it really takes everything he’s got not to say those words out loud.

Instead, Eddie gets lost in the scent of your perfume and the comfort of your delicate breathing into his frame. He’s memorising how your touch feels, how peaceful it is to simply be hugged by you. He wants to remember this forever and be able to think about it when you’re a thousand miles away.

He's not exactly sure how long the two of you stand like this for. Not like he cares, though. He wishes you could remain in this position forever. Reality unfortunately strikes when he hears you sniffling into his raggedy t-shirt. You proceed to reluctantly pull away and wipe your nose along with any lone tears that may have escaped while the two of you hugged, before offering him a warm smile.

“I-I actually have something for you,” you say and retrieves a cassette tape from the back pocket of your jeans. “I was going to give this to you when we said our final goodbyes, but I guess it doesn’t have to wait. Here.”

Eddie reaches for the gift and for the first time all morning, the smile on his face is genuine. It’s a copy of Janis Joplin’s Pearl.

“It’s my tape. The same one we listened to in your van that time,” you explain as his fingers graze across the cracked case. “I wanted to get you a new one but I figured the sentimental value of this one is priceless. After all, one of my favourite memories with you is associated with this specific tape.”

That’s when the metalhead looks up to catch your eye. 

“I can’t accept this.”

“No, no, no,” you protest, “It would really mean a lot to me if you took it, Eddie. I kinda like the thought of you listening to it when I’m a thousand miles away.” There’s a brief pause as you hesitate, “Maybe you’ll even think of your best friend when Me and Bobby McGee plays.”

There’s a glimmer in your eyes that Eddie can’t quite decipher, though, it’s a look that makes him want to reach out for you and wrap his arms around you once again.

So that’s exactly what he does.

He slides the tape into one of the pockets of his denim jacket before pulling you into another embrace. You slam gently into his chest, smiling wide, and let out content hum as Eddie places a kiss on your crown. 

This was your last moment together for months. Months. That terrified you both equally. Since the two of you first started hanging out, you’ve only ever been apart for maybe a day or two at a time — usually when either of you was sick, but even then you’d find a way to see each other, if only through a bedroom window.

Eddie was also fortunate enough that your parents really liked him. They never judged him by his appearance or thought of him any less because of the way he was brought up. Even with your dad being a police officer, bailing the curly-haired teen out of trouble on more than one occasion, your parents were always supportive of your friendship.

He’s gonna miss the Thursday dinners at your house. The family trips he was always invited to join. Learning how to fix up cars with your dad while you sat on a broken chair in the corner of the garage and did your homework. And even though Eddie knows that even with you away at college, he always has support in your parents, the thought of doing any mundane task without you, makes him sorrowful.

“I’ll never not be thinking of you, princess.” Eddie announces honestly. “Even when you’re making new friends and are busy forgetting all about me,” he tries to joke, but it just pains him more, “You are always, always, going to be on my mind.” 

He thinks then that his feelings are indeed genuine. He’s convinced mainly because this feels right. Him and you, holding each other like this. It feels… right. And his heart grows fonder as you squeeze him tighter, plus he swears there’s an aura around the two of you, glowing a bright fucking pink like in the comics he’s always telling you to read. Jesus Christ. Screw “liking” you. He may actually even be deeply fucking in love with you.

Which is exactly why he cannot tell you. Especially now.

You deserve to say goodbye to Hawkins, even if it’s just temporary, and get the education you’ve been dreaming of ever since he’s known you, meet new and interesting people, and make memories that he’ll gladly listen to detailed retellings of. Eddie knows if he told you right now, whether you felt the same way or not, you would feel guilty for leaving. You wouldn’t enjoy yourself as much as a college experience is supposed to be enjoyed ‘cause you’d be constantly thinking of him.

Eddie couldn’t do that to you. Not now. Maybe one day he would admit it to you: “Princess, I’ve been in love with you since we were eighteen.”. Honestly, he doesn’t mind that at all. Just depends on where your life takes you, which he selfishly hopes isn’t too far away from him.

“Shit, I am really gonna miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too, Eddie.”

pearl masterlist | main masterlist

thank you for reading <3

& tagging some cool people that expressed interest in this lil series: @cactusangie , @spenciesprincess , @capitanostella

[lazulirus]

Fair Play

• The things you had to do as a law student... for sure you didn’t expect to descend into the infamous Night Raven College to argue with one of their dorm leaders.

• Pairing: Azul Ashengrotto x reader (gender-neutral) (not MC) • Genre: fluff • Word Count: 4.6k • Warnings: none • Note: aka Lazu using her dubious law knowledge for fun

It seemed like a law student never had vacations.

Sure, for some being able to go through the historical halls of Night Raven College would be better than a visit to any tropical country or rest in the best hotels. You would probably enjoy it too, if it weren’t for the stressed student leading you through the never-ending corridors, the silly anemone on his head the only colour in the gloomy school. His glances towards you were like spells you could never dream of using - sharing that stress of his with you. But despite that, you gave him a smile every time he looks back; the lawyer should always be levelheaded.

“So… Casey. What does he look like?” The meaningless question was better than the tension created by the silence between you two - the jazz music from the cafe was annoying buzzing rather than a kind distraction. 

“White hair, in a stupid suit like all Octavinelle students, you’ll recognise him by a shit-eating grin.”

“Hm~ You described him so nicer just a few days ago.” 

“Because I didn’t know he was a scammer then!” When a few clients and workers - either wearing distinctive hats or anemones - shot him a glance he got timid, and added in a whisper: “I just now see the red flags, okay? Just, don’t trust his looks.” 

“Eh~? Little fry is late for his shift~!” 

The arguing between Casey and a ridiculously tall man dressed loosely in a suit becomes another background noise. The pleading of being innocent and menacing cackling were drawing the attention of others, but people were quick to look away as if looking at the tall student for too long was like a curse. Maybe it was? You wondered, your gaze jumping from one twin to another - the second one a bit less scary looking - you didn’t know very well how magic worked after all.

“And you have to be our esteemed guest,” This twin, despite face being the same, was way more elegant and with a soothing aura; it was proof of how much a well-kept attire could do. You stealthily take a glance at your clothes, wondering if you were underdressed for the occasion; all of them in suits, maybe Octavinelle being a mafia wasn’t a joke. “I’m Jade Leech and that–” He gestures towards the twin who was dragging your guide towards the kitchen. “–was my brother Floyd.”

You nodded, giving your name that they probably already knew. The eccentric Headmaster you met a day prior promised to give them all the needed information. “Azul is waiting for you in the VIP room. Shall we?” Before you could do anything more than nod, Jade’s hand was between your shoulder blades as he guided you between tables. There was nothing to be scared of, at least you tried to make yourself think that. Azul was around your age, and sure, he was in prestige school with the future to be an outstanding mage, but at the end of the day, he was just a student. It wasn’t like you will compete with him on the ground of magic and spells, you were almost equal! 

Those thoughts quickly left your head as the grand VIP room suffocated you with its brilliance, and Azul overwhelmed you with his mere presence. Calm and collected, already sitting on one of the couches, his presence perfect from the tilt of the hat to the shine of his boots. Meanwhile, you can only clutch onto the strap of your bag; hesitating. 

“Ah, Welcome! I’m Azul Ashengrotto, the dorm leader of Octavinelle, although I’m certain you already knew that.” Like a true gentleman, he stood up to greet you, the light sparkling delicately in his glasses. You no longer were surprised that so many idiots had fallen for his charm, not when such pretty lips were letting out such a smooth, calming voice. 

Your looks were a little plain, but Azul was smarter than to judge a book by its cover - there was a reason why Crowley would allow you to visit Night Raven Collegue outside of events. Especially on such short notice, as only yesterday he was informed about the visit. A noble? An esteemed mage? You weren’t someone who Azul recognised and it only made him more intrigued; the mystery caused fascination and hopefully many opportunities.

Jade leaves you two for a moment, short enough to only allow you to sit on the opposite sides of the table but long enough for him to return with a steaming hot pot of tea. As the butler-like student - you wondered if it was in his nature or was it a role he took in this bizarre place - was pouring it into the cups, Azul spoke up:

“I don’t usually grant wishes for outsiders, but since our kind Headmaster allowed it–”

“Oh, I’m not here for your deals.” You open the laptop on your lap, the white pages of the documents illuminating your face even so slightly. “I’m here to represent my cousin - Casey, first-year student of Heartslabyul, and prove that your contract was unfair; null and void.” 

The tea pours over the cup.

“...Excuse me?” Jade fumbles with the napkins, correcting his mistake as his intrigued gaze jumps from you to dumbfounded Azul. “Is this some kind of a joke?”

“No. Mister Crowley didn’t tell you?” It was the only reason why the headmaster allowed you to enter - he believed a student could find a similar language with another student. “Casey gave me all the information he could, although I was disappointed to know you didn’t give him a copy of the contract. It’s a bad practice.” Looking for proper articles would be easier with the contract, but you didn’t have time to demand a rightful copy; you had to work with what you had. …Which wasn’t much.

“This… this is unacceptable,” He said adjusting his glasses, and there was no longer kindness in his expression, the blues eyes glaring at you. “I should have been informed that it will be this kind of meeting.”

“I think it’s fine. Your clients also came unprepared.”

“We never turned away anyone who came with assistance to understand Azul’s service in a more in-depth manner,” Jade chimed in, standing behind the dorm leader like a shadow, “the fact that no one ever came with such help is a problem beyond our control.”

As you ignore Jade’s comment and kept yourself busy with preparing all the information and opening all needed Codes, Azul was sweating. It wasn’t visible, just a few pearls hidden by the shade of the fedora, but it was there; reminding him of his own anxiety. Way too many students came to his doors full of teeth and claws but always with more bark than bite - only able to scream and moan about how all of it was unfair. But you came silently, sitting in front of him with the calmness of a true outsider; no matter the results, it won’t truly affect you. other students were just crabs and snails, but you were a wave; unaffected by a tiny octopus.

Azul adjust his glasses again, despite them being perfect like everything in his little sand castle - or so he thought as now it felt like a wave was coming. Creeping, inching slowly but quietly, like a silence before a storm.

“The fact that you’re both minors should make this contract null from the beginning,” Azul takes a deep breath and counts to four. “Unless I’m mistaken? Casey said that you’re seventeen.” Five heartbeats before he let out his breath.

“It is true… Although I wouldn’t agree with the former statement.” And there he was, with the voice lacking the grand intonations from the beginning but also not as hasty as the moment before. Calm and collected, making you raise an eyebrow even so slightly; was his nickname of octopus coming from how quickly he changes his act like a camouflage? “It was an agreement that provided him with notes for exams, it’s simply a minor matter of everyday life for a student.”

“Article twenty of Civil Law Code if I remember correctly.” Jade allowed himself to walk behind you, the coach still separating the two of you, but his face was uncomfortably close as his fingers skimmed over your laptop’s keyboard, quickly finding the needed article. “[A person limited in the capacity for legal action may, without the consent of the statutory representative, conclude contracts belonging to contracts commonly concluded in a minor current matter of everyday life.]” From the corner of your eye, you could see eerily close how his lips bend in a delicate smile. 

“However,” You say, your lips trembling to not form into a scoff; you scroll up to reveal another paragraph, Jade’s eyes looking with interest. “[When a person incapable of legal acts has entered into an agreement belonging to the agreements commonly concluded in minor matters of everyday life, such an agreement becomes valid upon its implementation, unless it entails gross detriment to the person incapable of legal acts.] Don’t you think having him work for till he graduates is a bit excessive? I think it’s grossly big punishment that doesn’t suit the crime.” 

“Punishment? Crime? I think you’ve misunderstood something.” Azul said, spreading his hands with a pained expression; as if your words hurt his very pride. “It was a fair agreement. The article you cited - article fourteen I believe? Excuse me for being unsure if it’s the first or second paragraph - only works for a person incapable of legal acts. Given that your dear cousin is seventeen he has limited capacity for legal actions. Thus, he was well in his right to agree to this contract and fully aware of what he was agreeing upon.”

“Still…” You mumbled before taking a sip of the tea; it was better than you expected. “Tilia tea with raspberries, I’m delighted you’re enjoying it.” Azul chimed in with a smile that could almost make you forget how scummy he was… scummy with a good taste, though. It was impressive and a bit unnerving how quickly he saw the change in your expression, despite how soft it was. The clank of porcelain was the only answer Azul got as you put the cup back down.

“Anyway, I still think your contract is unfair.” Azul raises his eyebrow, both surprised and amused by your fighting spirit; with a nod he encourages you to go on. “First of all, let’s make it clear: The first part were you giving study guides in exchange for… talents; magic; something like this. Then the idio�� Casey,” Azul chuckles but hides it quickly by coughing into his fist, you don’t even notice as you look through the Code. “I guess we can say that him getting high marks thanks to your guide was like a promotion of the item…" You mumbled the last part more to yourself, but Azul could hear every word. As you go through your notes about the case, Azul couldn’t help but stare a little - what a peculiar case you were yourself. You didn’t come here with empty arguments - like many others, throwing accusations and trying to ‘gotcha’ Azul without a second thought - you were actually thinking. Not only selfishly looking from only your perspective but also his, like just now, already saying argument he had on the back of his tongue. Trying so hard to predict his next move… Oh, what a shame it was you weren’t part of the student body.

 “Since he didn’t fulfil his part of the agreement the punishment was being your slave–”

"No no, they aren't slaves.” Azul said with a chuckle; you didn’t find it funny at all. “I would say they're high-class workers on contract work.”

“They even get employee dinners," Jade commented.

“Contract work requires wages but since they’re working off their debt to you for failing their part of the agreement I won’t even go into that…” Peculiar and intelligent, how refreshing to talk with someone on his level and avoid unnecessary squabble. “But still, since it’s Mutual Agreement, tell me, [The debtor is obliged to repair the damage resulting from lack of service or improper service of the obligation,] how my cousin passing with not enough points was damaging and working to the bone in your cafe is repairing those damages?”

“Well, that’s rather simple. I spent ages creating that guidebook, I also had to sacrifice my time to prepare the contract and make the deal with your cousin. All that time could be used for managing the Monstro Lounge. Since Casey didn’t uphold his part of the agreement, he wasted my time.” Those blue eyes of his became a bit sharper, the smile gaining another layer, more cunning and mocking “And as you said, his results being unimpressive hurts the reputation of my precious guides. If I can’t profit from them, I have to put more work into the cafe. Would you buy a guide if it only guaranteed to pass the exams with mediocre results?”

“If I was desperate, sure. As far as I know, only this type of people came to you.” It earned a chuckle out of Jade, but his gloved hand wasn’t quick enough to cover the sharp teeth peeking out. The predatory feature makes you gulp, wondering if Jade was really needed for the discussion - it was probably fair that he was helping since Azul wasn’t informed, but his creepy behaviour was making you uneasy. His two-coloured eyes catch your gaze and your heart became heavy when he smiles even wider; sharp razor teeth. This for sure was intimidation! 

You still wondered how anyone could fall for such a contract - especially given in such a shady environment and company! Casey praised his ‘secret help’ since the moment he got it, he wouldn’t shut up about it every time you messaged each other. At first, you praised him, proud that he was getting serious about exams for once, but after learning in detail about the contract you didn’t know if you should strangle him or worse. If Azul’s guide was so good, why would he gamble on Casey getting into the top 50 results? He would have to either believe that Casey won’t use it, was too stupid or knew that despite the guide, getting such high marks was… impossible.

“paragraph two of article three hundred eighty-seven… [A party that knew about the impossibility of the service at the time of concluding the contract, and did not correct the other party's wrong assumptions, is obliged to repair the damage that the other party suffered because it concluded the contract without knowing about the impossibility of service.]”

“Oh my, that’s quite the accusation.” His chuckle was irritating, and the smugness was written all over, but the corners of his lips didn’t reach blue eyes showing his disappointment, his opponent turned out to be nothing more than another whining crab. “It’s harsh to say that the conditions I gave to my clients were impossible…” 

“I talked with one of Casey’s friends,” you attack quickly, “Ace, I think? He and his other friends quoted that you had esteemed that with your guide, Ace should get at least 90 points.”

“That’s relatively a lot for someone afraid he won’t pass at all, no? I think it only proves how useful my guide is.”

“He got 92 and despite that failed the contract requirements. So you knew that he won’t be able to archive the goal of being in the top 50.”

“I said that we will get at least, so that means–”

“How many people had your help? Casey said that there were around two hundred students; that’s already quite the competition and to that, we have to count other naturally gifted students. The dorm leaders already take seven spots… To that we can count the vice dorm leaders, I can bet they’re as talented as dorm leaders since they got that title, so it would be 14 spots out of 50… that leaves 36 spots! And that’s not counting other smart students without the titles!” 

“Indeed, the 30 students on top of the list had perfect marks; five hundred points, among them, were dorm leaders: Riddle Rosehearts, Malleus Draconia, Vil Schoenheit or Azul Ashengrotto.” Jade added and even his dorm leader’s glare - one screaming Traitor! - couldn’t shut him up nor make him stop smiling.

You cross your arms. If those with the guides had around 90 points, getting even on the 50th place was impossible - not even a challenge, it was a dream! Not doable, not achievable no matter how hard one would try. “Don’t you think it counts as impossible?”

“Even if…” Azul avoids your gaze, but quickly returns - he would rather look at your alluring confidence than the irritating enjoyment of Jade. “They were aware of the knowledge that dorm leaders have to exhibit. And when it comes to clients, I couldn’t simply inform them of others forming the same contract. Details such as who made and what contract they made with me and why it was made; that's all privileged data, a matter of client confidentiality.” He gains back his confidence, yet he adjusts his glasses once again. “It was written on page 59; details about confidentiality. To put it simply, none of the sides can talk about the details of the contract until it’s finalised. I was simply abiding by the contract for the sake of my clients.”

“So the contract was faulty,” You tilt your head to the side. “No? If you tell them, you break the contract and if you don’t, you break the law. No matter what you do you can’t legally fulfil your obligations.” 

Azul exchanged glances with Jade, the blue gaze was alarmed and didn’t resemble the amusement in mismatched colours. Then, he looks even worse, pale and almost sick when his companion smiles at him, oh so kindly. 

“Oh my, I see that this conversation might go on for a while longer,” he picks up the cold and half-full cups. “I’ll go fetch more tea.” 

“Jade–!” But the door was already closed, leaving the two of you alone. You try to keep yourself busy even though your constant writing was nothing more than nonsense lines of letters. You didn’t want to meet Azul’s glare. It was heavy, annoyed - no, mad, and you couldn’t blame him for that reaction… but also couldn’t spare him. 

“It would be way easier if we had a judge or something…” You mumbled, the clicking of the keyboard filling the room. “Uh, the Heartsbyul has a lot of rules, right? I think their dorm leader would be good to resolve this matter fairly, at least Casey said that he is all about fairness and rules.” 

It was not a good idea. At all. Making it public that his contracts were nothing but perfect and watertight… A cold sweat collected on Azul’s skin. If they learn of it - those fools, idiots that just want to slack and then beg for help - all of them will come back with the same excuse, all of them will think of him as the fool they can screw over. Mockery from Leona, judgment from Riddle… 

“I’m sure we can come to an agreement.” He said a bit too quickly, and he sees the tower of his sand castle crumbling under the water as you smile at him first time since you came here. It was sickly sweet; pretty. “I cannot release all of my debtors from the contracts due to that, but I can–”

“Nah, I don’t care about that.” You cut him off, shrugging. “I just want my cousin out of this.” You weren’t working pro bono, which came as a surprise, although it shouldn’t. He got so used to everyone in this school having an ulterior motive, a second face that he foolishly thought that outsiders might not be like that - your similarity to him was more prominent than Azul expected, or perhaps selfishness was simply a trait of all land and sea dwellers.

“Then… I release Casey from under the contract and in exchange,” he disregards your scoff with deliberate ignorance, “I would like consultations with you.” You noted already that Azul smiles a lot, no matter if the cards were in his favour or not - whenever he had to fake a good hand or really had it. It was fascinating how such a young man was able to control himself so skillfully, that his words were so soft; innocent; like gentle music but you heard a screech on the melody. 

“What exactly do you mean by that?” And to your surprise, the scummy businessman doesn’t seem annoyed. 

“I want you to look through my next contracts; find any oversights.” A rather easy request, no?

“Only once a week, and I don’t want to rewrite or fix them, just point them out. And I’ll do it with the duty of care expected from a mere student.” Seemingly, yes, but there was so much more. Pointing out that you were a mere student was important – that way Azul couldn’t expect from you the knowledge and skills matching those of a lawyer. Range of your duties, how often and for how long… From the way he was so tight-lipped with those informations, you could guess other students didn’t ask for them, probably. Were all of them all stupid as Casey?

“Hah~ Once a week is for sure a reasonable request, given how busy we are as students.” The light reflects beautifully in Azul’s glasses as he gets up, like a playful wink that would match the self-satisfied smirk; it makes you feel as if you didn’t have the upper hand. The metallic groan of the safe, the clacking of perfectly polished shoes and the view of the white-as-snow glove that contrasted strongly with the golden contract. It all was like a movie experience, way too pristine and perfect, even Azul’s lulling voice:

“Here is Casey’s contract. It will become null the moment we sign ours.” He lays the contract on his desk; enough to be in your view but far away for him to feel safe. “I’ll admit, I’m impressed with your knowledge, no one before fought so well against my contracts.” After a moment of shock, you smile faintly. 

“The feeling is mutual.” Your eyes were focused on putting the laptop into the case, making sure to not scrap it with the zip. “...I kinda admire your work. I mean, it’s not very fair towards others, but it’s just school stuff so… I just want to say I’m impressed with that stun you pulled.” The pen stopped, and Azul’s gaze moved towards you. Sitting behind the great, wooden desk, you felt like a student in front of a teacher; he was perfect just like the moment you first saw him, composed to the point you could think the conversation never occurred, the deal between you was never made. As he doesn’t comment - you’re not sure if Azul even blinked - you started to ramble, flustered. “Just, I’m sure it’s not easy to pull something like this. Over two hundred students? And you actually helped them pass? And it was so hard to find any problem with your contracts! No wonder you get nicknamed an octopus, you’re as smart as one!”

“I am an octopus, though…?” He blurted out.

“What?”

“Have you never heard of mermen?” Your awe-struck face makes Azul chuckle way more honestly than he ever expected himself to do. You were so crafty yet so ignorant about the basic magic part of this world; he would be offended that such a person beat him in his own game if it wasn’t this fascinating. It felt like losing a game of chess to Floyd - unexpected, but only awakening a craving to figure out the bizarre way of thinking of his opponent. “There are a few of us in Night Raven College, me included.” 

The gleam of excitement in your eyes was also Floyd-like - Azul thought before getting back to writing; the first letter, fresh with ink was shaky. “Woah~! Now all of Casey’s rambling make sense.” 

“He also mentioned you.” Azul smiled fondly. “He threatened me with his lawyer cousin and how here I am, regretting I didn’t take him more seriously.” Maybe then he wouldn’t have an upcoming headache from stress, but he also wouldn’t meet such an interesting person. “It’s a shame that person of your talents wasn’t lucky to join us here, you would make a great addition to the Octavinelle.” Such sweet words, made of honey; the sweetness seeping into you, making your heart heavy with pride and cheeks warm. Inviting you to get closer, stand in front of Azul, your hip resting on the side of the desk. 

“Perhaps…” His writing becomes slower, the letter slightly heavier as Azul takes his time writing each of them. “After we’re done with this, I could show you around, the College is pleasingly quiet around this hour.” The way he glances at you, his big eyes barely visible makes your heart skip a beat and your tongue goes limp in your mouth. He wanted to spend more time with you? 

The paper was pushed towards you, but Azul doesn’t lose eye contact, maybe for a moment when he averts his gaze, his smile apologetic. “Although I still have after-class activities… The headmaster should be kind enough to look the other way if you would be willing to join me there, it’s nothing magic-related.” 

There was only a buzz in your head; a mix of excitement and fluster. A tour around the Night Raven, taking part in their activities, even if they weren’t the real classes - it all was unreal, too good to be true someone would say. But when the stress of the encounter left you, leaving only sweet praise and an even sweeter smile from a handsome man, it was hard to not take the pen and the opportunity. 

“No way.” His smile drops and so does all the glow and splendor around him. You barely stop a scowl, unsure if you should even point it at the shady man or the paper. “I’ll be around for the following days. I’ll come to read and sign the contract personally, no need for Casey to be the middle man.” 

“I was only looking out for you.” Azul’s tone was just a bit colder, even though still kind, he no longer was shy or rather no longer acted like it. “No need for you to waste your time on the formalities.” It was said without any malice, you weren’t even sure if you could hear mocking in his voice.

“It is kinda my future job.” You scoffed, no longer able to hide the disgust and your anger grew stronger when Azul didn’t even flinch. “I guess the offer is no longer valid, so–”

“I was serious about showing you around.” Azul cuts in, muffling the noise of crumbling paper, just a flash of disappointment on his face when the unfulfilled scheme goes to the trash. It was a good plan, but perhaps the execution of it wasn’t worth it; now his heart was rowdy, and blood hummed in his ears. “My praise wasn’t a lie. I truly admire your skills.” But the honey no longer allured you, even if looked so well.

“Then you can treat me to some cake when I get back to sign the thing.” You suggested, no, demanded before outreaching your hand with another order. “Your phone.” Azul raised an eyebrow. 

“Is this extortion?”

“It’s writing my number.” You fought yourself to not smile at his completely-lame joke. “Unless you want me to come over every day to check if you’re done?”

His heart skip a beat. 

“Gladly.”

[lvrhughes]

All of the Girls You Loved Before | M. Marner

pairing: Mitch Marner x f!reader

Word count: 1k

summary: You and Mitch had been together through your teen years, but it didn’t last. As they say if they live something let it go, if it’s meant to be it’ll come back, giving you a new found appreciation for all the girls he loved before.

Warnings: none! so much fluff

Requested: yes

“We’ve gone over this before, I am with you, I’m not going out with other girls while you're away! If I wanted someone else I wouldn’t be dating you!” 

Mitch was mad this time, letting the average teenage insecurities take over and assume the worst, creating another late night fight. Another lame fight over the phone. 

“Mitch, I’m sorry-”

“No I don’t want to hear it right now, I think we should take a break.”

“Oh.” was all you said at the time, thinking back on it maybe you should’ve said no, maybe then you’d have had a longer relationship, but as they say if you love something let it go, if it’s meant to be they’ll come back. 

Your laugh echoed the empty streets, Mitch pulling you towards the town. The two of you had snuck out, planning on sneaking into town, It wasn’t a far walk anyways. Yet somehow the walk took longer than normal, maybe from how many times you stopped because you were laughing too much or when you stopped to take pictures, either way you didn’t know. But it was fun, he was holding your hand the entire time, killin’ time with each other. Until you had to sneak back in.

“Y/n Y/l/n, where were you!” your mothers voice was loud and Mitch, who was outside making sure you didn’t fall while climbing back into your window, could hear the anger in her voice. You got grounded for two weeks. 

Throughout your teenage years you knew Mitch had other girlfriends, but you were his first, but that stupid phone call ruined that. It’s safe to say none of his other girlfriends lasted, because, even though you broke up, you two tried to stay friends and he always came back with a new reason as to why she left. 

“She said that this was just a dead-end street, we had no future together.”

“That’s a new one, I like the originality!” 

“Ha ha, very funny.” Mitch deadpanned, making you burst out with laughter, the sound making his blank expression soften into a smile. 

Your 21st birthday, the first time you had gotten into a bar, legally, and you were going to have a good time, that’s what you said. 

You’d found a cute guy, the same age, he had a little resemblance to Mitch, maybe that’s why you found him. It was going well, you were having a good time with him, dancing and drinking. Until you saw Mitch, the one person you’d be trying to get over. 

“Um- Excuse me.” you stuttered before running to the bathroom, breaking down in tears. Crying' in the bathroom for some dude whose name I cannot remember now. 

You cleaned the messed makeup off as best you could before heading back out, trying to find what's-his-name again. He definitely left. You never found him after returning from the bathroom. No, instead you ran directly into Mitch, too busy looking around to look where you were going, you basically fell on him. 

“Shit, I’m sorry.” you scrambled to get up before he could say anything. 

“Y/n?” fuck, the way he said your name made you melt, he always was your weakness. 

“Hi Mitch.” was all you could mutter, even then the words barely came out, they were only a whisper, yet he heard them. Basking in the way you said his name, he always loved the way you said it. 

So your 21st wasn’t as bad as that sounded because it ended in Mitch bringing you home, asking for your new number since you must’ve changed it from when you were 17 and still talking to him, and a promise to rebuild the friendship that had ended. And you did rebuild the friendship, surprisingly quick, too. 

Going through boxes of old things in Mitch’s house, asking for help when he planned to move out from his parents, you found an old letter. One of the only letters he kept, you’d need to ask him if he still wanted this in his house seeing how it was signed. His name in a heart on the front of the letter, not your writing. But it was okay, whoever this was from led him back to you. You had his love now. 

“I’m so glad for all the girls you loved before.”

You looked up at him, laying on his chest, his hand on your back while he also laid on the couch.

“What?” he looked down at you, confusion was evident on his features. 

“The way you call me baby, the way you treat me like a lady.” you paused for a minute.

“All the girls you loved before, they made you the one I fell for. All the dead-end streets lead you straight to me, now you're all I need. So I’m thankful for the girls you loved before.” 

Mitch could feel himself melting at the words, pulling you closer and tighter. 

“God, I love you.” he mumbled before leaning down to kiss you. 

When you did try to pull away for air, he kept you close, peppering you with kisses. 

“Mitch- st-stop” your words being broken by giggles. He did not stop however, he flipped the two of you so you were no under him, his chain dangling in front of you. 

“Your mother raised you so loyal and kind.” You whispered, seeing his face change with the compliments.

“Teenage love taught you there’s good in goodbye.” He was so caught off guard by your random words he just stayed still, listening for what you’d say next.

“Every woman you’ve ever known brought you here.”

He stayed patient waiting for your next words. 

“I want to teach you how forever feels.”

He wasted no time kissing you again, practically laying on you now, trying to be as close as possible to you. 

“I guess I’m a little thankful for those girls too.” he mumbled against your lips, quickly pressing his back to yours after mumbling that. You smiled into the kiss, waiting a minute before pulling away. 

“I’m so thankful for all the girls you loved before, but i love you more.”

[bellafemme]

Thank you to the several followers of mine who privately showed me what whenmagicfilledtheair said about me on their blog. She is a absolute liar. It was jackandmeglittlecreamsoda who sent me the question about Jack playing in Olivia Rodrigo's new song. Not an anonymous person. I was answering the question sent to me. But to the point, all the times I have contacted whenmagicfilledtheair I have never needed to go anonymous or private. I contacted her using my username just as you see me here. I spoke to her in her inbox privately with my username as you see here. This is the only account username I have on Tumblr. I don't have any other account and I don't leave messages in other blogs as anonymous. What for? That is stupid. I don't play games. I don't need to talk to myself or create usernames to talk to myself to create content. That's fucking crazy. That is what crazy people like whenmagicfilledtheair do. It sucks because I had a good back and fourth communication with this person, even sending them old links from glittergloombeauty's page about Jack and Olivia. We had a nice Tumblr friendship. I am shocked and hurt by their accusation. I was nothing but kind to them. I stopped posting on her page because I didn't have time to run my own blog and comment on every single solitary Olivia Jean post they made. There were times they would create 90 posts per week just on Olivia Jean. I work. I have a real life. I don't have time to comment on every Olivia Jean post they made or all the shit post they created about TMR or Jack. I also put my attention on other artists like Halsey, Lana, Ethel or other female artists that bring me joy. Olivia Jean doesn't bring me joy and she never has. It was funny to read about her sometimes. In a healthy way. But imagine commenting on a person you don't like every five minutes like whenmagicfilledtheair. What a horrible miserable life they must lead. I didn't block whenmagicfilledtheair before but I have now. lademoiselleofsadness was right about this person but I gave them the benefit of the doubt. I didn't care they were who they were on instagram. Maybe I should have. I will follow advice and block everyone who's commented on whenmagicfilledtheair's page. Now they all look sus to me. Those accounts were created in June or July of this year and have no activity. The activity that do exists was created starting in June. They look like burner accounts. Maybe all this time I was talking to the same person thinking it was different people. That's sick but not surprising. If I end up blocking a person who is real and not whenmagicfilledtheair then that sucks. Good luck whenmagicfilledtheair. You are fucked up crazy and going to need it. I can imagine how lonely and pathetic your life is attacking the one person who showed you nothing but kindness. Go ahead and carry on with your 90 Olivia Jean posts a week. I know you will be reading and screen shoting this post using another one of your fake burner accounts. Please do me a favor and go fuck yourself straight back to hell where you belong.

[gorbalsvampire]

If you were redesigning Blood Sorcery, what would its central schtick be? What makes it potentially unique and interesting, and not just a swiss army knife? (I'd argue Thinblood Alchemy is maybe a more interesting and balanced fill for that total versatility niche.)

Hm!

So, I actually kinda like the core Discipline as it exists in V5. The art of discovering truths about someone through their Blood, or manipulating the Blood directly, or turning the Blood into a weapon or a message? That shit rips. That is a good time.

I'd move Scour Secrets into Auspex (seriously, what the shit is it doing here?) and I'm turning Koldunic Sorcery over and over in my hands - it's a botch job, but the net effect works, you take that and then your upper levels are things like Visceral Absorbtion and Transitive Bond, there's a Tzimisce-sorcerer route through the Discipline and it does hold together now that i think about it. It's fine.

I think a good Discipline is one where you can cross the streams, but it's also apparent what the streams are. Blood Sorcery is a good Discipline, it has archetypal routes through for your stereotypical Tremere and Banu Haqim and Tzimisce but also space for you to push sideways and create characters who have leant this way or that.

Digression: Oblivion is a bad Discipline, largely because it has four pathways between two clans and is trying to cover two historically separate applications of mysticism and ceremony while also remaining as faithful as it can to every depiction of them that's ever existed, because it's a Dawkins design and he can't not include something that's canon. Great concept, but indulgent execution. Someone needed to say no.

But then we get into Rituals, and that's where the bloat kicks in. Niche protection? What niche protection? Haven't you heard, we're Tremere!

I think each Ritual needs to be interrogated. Ask it what it's for. Why does it exist at the level it exists? What is Clinging of the Insect for? We have Potence and Celerity powers for that. Splash another Discipline, you cowards, this is worth more than 3 XP and some bug juice.

What is Blood Walk for? Why is it not a critical effect on Taste for Blood, the mainline power that's its obvious prerequisite? This is stupid. Merge them.

What is Wake With Evening's Freshness for? Why do Tremere get to do this, for cheap? Get rid of it.

Do that, and pare the Rituals right down to the ones like Enrich the Blood, Herd Ward, Calix Secretus, the ones that are clearly derived from actual Blood manipulation. To be honest, the Oblivion notion of prerequisite powers is a good one, and if you can't think of a good prerequisite power, chances are you don't have a good Ritual - you have an Ars Magicka wizard spell that nobody's had the spine to delete.

I've said before and I'm saying now that I prefer Tremere as alchemists to Tremere as mages from Ars Magicka backformed into mages from Mage. It shucks off a lot of baggage, it makes them a self-contained Vampire concept (this is a problem I also have with the Giovanni, to be entirely fair), and - in the context of this ask - it also creates some cool parallels with the thin-bloods, the Duskborn of the here and now. Tremere looks to Thin-blood: as you are, we once were. As we are, you are not allowed to be. No wonder Tremere invented the practice of branding the little shits.

I do agree that being a hyperflexible little multi-tool, manifesting semi-random powers from Resonances and cultivating specific counterfeits with Alchemy, is a really good niche for Thin-Bloods to occupy. The Revised era version - "vampire from clan, but shittier" - had no appeal outside of specific metaplot-hugging or masochistic playstyles. The V5 version is exciting. People should play them, and want to play them.

That said, I have some beef - specifically, a Thin-Blood who lives long enough and plays with other clans erodes niche protection by being able to counterfeit most Disciplines a PC from another clan can bring to the table, "anything you can do I can do" kind of deal. Level 5 is off the table, but how many PCs are getting level 5 powers at the standard rate of XP gain? Blood Potency is a counterbalance and if you bother to implement its rules all the way across (the rerolls are super important) I do think it works as a balance, but this isn't about what works. It's about the feeling of having your special snowflake power, and yours, and yours, all available to this one character.

I think I'd get rid of Counterfeit Discipline, as a thing: you can curate low level powers from feeding, and you have unique Alchemy effects, and that's enough, actually.