#maybe it’s the fact that they’re both so happy when they around their women

[yoslos]

i can’t explain it. but jackie and wilson and she calls me back are the same song.

[restinslices]

I don’t know if I requested this already but how do you think the Lin Kuei bros would react when each of them got their first gf?

It’s 5am but I’m avoiding sleep cause sleep paralysis been kicking my ass recently so here we are. I didn’t know if you were imagining a certain age or how detailed you wanted it so they’re all at different ages

Bi-Han

Bi-Han doesn't have that much experience when it comes to dating even if he's the oldest brother 

Growing up he was taught to mainly focus on his clan since he'd be the next Grandmaster so naturally dating is something that was at the back of his mind 

When he got his first girlfriend he'd probably be older. So he's mature when it comes to handling himself but he's not mature when it comes to romantic relationships 

I think the first week would be the hardest because he's both nonchalant but also worried if that makes sense

Nonchalant because he doesn't physically show any emotion besides disdain but also worry because whenever he hears about new relationships, people are always so giddy. They're glowing. They're jumping up and down and are cuddled next to their partner all the time. 

Bi-Han though? He doesn't do any of that. He's not sure what he should do and since he doesn't know, it makes him worry that maybe he made the wrong choice. Maybe he took the bit of affection you gave him and ran with it and it went outta hand 

After that first week though, he still wants to be with and around you so he starts to relax and realize he just reacts differently to things 

Some things he would struggle with since this is his first relationship. He'd struggle with the idea of being around his partner so often. Does he enjoy your presence? Yeah. But he also wants a lot of alone time 

Idk how long his first relationship would last. He gives me both “we're in this forever” and “forever isn't realistic” vibes. 

I honestly don't think he'd change much, which probably has a lot to do with the fact that he's a grown man. He's past all the intense teenage emotions. 

I don't even think his partner would notice a difference tbh. He trails behind you more but besides that, he still acts like your friend Bi-Han which isn't necessarily a bad thing 

Because it's his first relationship, I don't see him initiating things like physical touch that much. I think his partner would have to either ask or hint at it 

Cutsey things just don't come naturally to him. 

Is he happy about his first relationship? Absolutely. He just doesn't see the big deal with certain things like hand holding or other romantic expectations. Honestly I can see that being the cause of his first relationship ending depending on who it is but if it's someone that's on the same wavelength or understands lack of affection doesn't mean lack of love then I could see it lasting forever. 

Kuai Liang 

Kuai Liang was probably the first to start dating 

Does he have responsibilities? Yes. But that wouldn't stop him from experiencing certain things, even if he had to do it sneakily. 

He was a young teenager when he finally got his first girlfriend. She was apart of a nearby clan and although he was told many times not to focus on women, he couldn't help it. 

It was a simple friendship but it turned into something more. A secret relationship no one could know about

I think Kuai Liang would be happy to finally have a girlfriend. It's something else in his life that gives him happiness besides his family. 

Also this is a teenager so he's geeked as fuck. He tries to appear all calm and cool but it wouldn't really work 

Would always try to sneak away to see her. He wants to spend as much time with her as he can. Half of it is because he's a teenager, half of it is because he genuinely likes her. 

I also think he likes exchanging gifts. It gave them both something to remember the other bye

As a young boy, he wants to tell everyone but because of circumstances, he can’t. Besides that though I just honestly think he’s happy waking up everyday knowing he’ll see her even if it’s only for a few minutes.

She was a break for him. He's always the mediator between Bi-Han and Tomas. He always had to train hard so he could assist Bi-Han when he became grandmaster. When he was with her he was relaxed. 

Enjoys the company that comes with having a partner, even if a lot of the times he's too busy to see her 

He knows he doesn’t know much about relationships, but that’s ok. Life’s a journey and he’s willing to learn and communicate for this girl

Considering it says “first relationship”, that means it doesn't last 

I think the reason would be they eventually get caught. His dad has a tighter leash on him and she's sent to a different area her clan occupies 

He wouldn't take this well but there's really nothing he can do

Takes him awhile to get over even if it was some silly teenage romance according to others. 

Tomas Vrbada

Tomas gets into his first relationship in his late teens to early twenties

I can see him telling Kuai Liang immediately and asking for advice 

I can see it being a friends to lovers kind of thing. She's an earthrealmer in the know about all the realms and stuff and knows Madam Bo. Tomas is easy to like so they become friends then he asks her out on accident 

Tomas, like Kuai Liang, would be happy to have a significant other. He'd like having a girlfriend because this is his person. He became a Lin Kuei because the grandmaster felt shame about his clan murdering Tomas’ family. To Tomas, that's not him actually wanting him. It's guilt 

Having a girlfriend though means she's with him because she loves him. She actually likes him and chose him.

Very proud boyfriend. He’s surprised he has someone to call his and thinks she’s everything 

He's younger so he's not really confident which I think would show. He constantly wants to be around her out of insecurity. He's worried that she'd leave and find someone else 

He thinks he’s not good enough for anything

Can we blame him? He has Bi-Han constantly making him feel shitty. Sure he’s not the only reason Tomas is insecure but he’s not helping

He's also paranoid about anyone else he loves being hurt. People get hurt, he understands that but he cannot say goodbye to someone else prematurely. Especially someone that makes him so happy

Since it's his first relationship, he doesn't know how to properly communicate these feelings 

He genuinely likes this person and wants to be something serious. The problem is all this hovering and worry could cause problems in the relationship and lead to it ending. 

His solution would be trying to change himself 

Letting go is not something he wants to do. This person makes him happy so why should he? He could definitely change and do better. 

And since this is his first relationship, he’s nervous something like this won’t happen again. 

Unfortunately for him you can’t get rid of insecurities easily and you have to love yourself before loving anyone else

You'd expect him to have the longest lasting relationship but he probably wouldn't. The relationship wouldn't end with harsh feelings but he'd still be upset by it and it'd encourage him to work on himself 

I promise you Kuai Liang is my favorite brother. Idk how Bi-Han got around 440 words and him and Tomas got around 380- I also plan on writing angst after I eventually go to sleep so tune in

[futbol16]

A Damn Beast  • Aitana Bonmatí

Part 2 My Tana

Request: Okay, I'd please like to request a fic. Aitana x SwedenWNT!R where they're Barca's newest star signing. Ruthless on the pitch but the team learns they're a softy off it. Cute height difference & maybe Aitana trying to learn Swedish from Rolfo. Thanks, happy holidays, & I hope this wasn't too much of an ask.

Word count: 1,5k

When your transfer to Barcelona had been announced the Barca fans were excited for your arrival, especially your team. But no one had been looking forward to meeting you as much as Aitana had. 

Throughout the past couple of weeks Frido hasn’t shut up about the talented youngster on her national team. She had praised your play style, how ambitious you were and how much of a sweetheart you were off the pitch. It’s not as if the girls had never heard about you, your name had become very well known in women’s football and you were often referred to as ‘Kvinna Zlatanera’. 

Aitana had admired your game play for a good while before she knew you’d be transferring to Barca. She had admired the way you were merciless while playing, confidently tackling players despite being a striker and she loved that smirk you’d have on your face after each goal and tackle you made. She thought very highly of you and couldn’t wait to share the pitch with you.

When the day of your arrival to the club finally came Aitana was all smiley and eager to start training. Patri and Mapi noticed the change in the midfielder instantly as usually she was a very calm and collected person, complete opposite of now as she practically dragged Fridolina out to the pitch.

“So is everyone tall in Sweden?” she questions the blonde as they walk side by side. Rolfö looks down at her curiously.

“Compared to you? Yes.” she laughs at the Spaniard who only rolls her eyes. Practice soon started as everyone warmed up and every time there was movement by the sidelines Aitana couldn’t help but glance there hoping to see your form. Just as they got a drink break before the more intense part of training she again found herself next to the Scandinavian.

“How do you say ‘Hello’ in Swedish?”

“Hallå”

“Hmm, okay that sounds very similar. What about ‘How are you’?” she pondered only to be met with Patri’s raised eyebrows and Mapi’s smirk, the tall blonde next to her wearing a similar expression. “Matter of fact, what’s that in your language?”

“Tana we’re both Spanish” Patri's voice holds amusement as the defender and the forward laugh by her sides, Aitana’s face heating up slightly in embarrassment.

Though sooner than later, you finally walked through the tunnel after signing the last of the papers. The grin on your face was blinding as you took in your surroundings, practically glowing as Frido ran towards you enveloping you in a hug. To Aitana it looked like two trees hugging, although you were still somewhat shorter than Frido you were insanely tall compared to the midfielder. It momentarily reminds her of Fridolina’s comment and she lets a small smile take over her expression. Though as you get closer to the group of players that small smile widens into a grin and she stands waiting impatiently for you to introduce yourself like she didn’t know exactly who you were. 

“This is Y/N-”

“I can do that Frido” you interrupt her with a teasing smile, the blonde’s arm hanging around your shoulders. “I’m Y/N, I usually play as a forward or striker, I played for Bayern München before coming here.”

“München?” Claudia questions confusedly, an expression that you share for a second before you realize.

“Munich, sorry.” you let out a small laugh, Aitana practically beaming at the sound. Her eyes rake over your body as she takes in your Barca clad form while you talk with her teammates. She has to admit, the blaugrana kit suits you, maybe a little too well.

“You’re drooling” Laia’s whisper and nudge has her breaking out of her trance. “Go talk to her, I know you want to”

A push to her back has her sauntering towards you and you send her a gentle smile as she looks up at you.

“Aitana. My name I mean. It’s Aitana, I’m Aitana.” she rambles and she can hear several smacks behind her, no doubt her friends face palming at her introduction. You, however, don’t move your gaze from her as you hold back your own laugh.

“Well hola Aitana” you greet her, your smile softening as you notice her dimpled smile and the way her eyes shine. You’re both so lost in the moment that you only blink back to reality when Jonatan yells to get back to training and Aitana almost gets hit in the head by a ball from Bruna. 

The shorter girl feels herself blush again as you approach the rest of the team.

That training session the barca girls watch in awe as you control the ball like you’re one with it and Frido can’t wipe the smile off her face both proud and happy to have you on her team. Your chemistry with the blonde is exhilarating to see and Aitana can only hope you’ll build that same chemistry with her and the team. 

The first time the Barca girls get to see you in action in a match is two weeks later when you verse Benfica. The expression you hold is one that has not only the opposition but them as well taking a step back from you, your game face hard, a fire in your eyes. You’re hungry for a win as you get subbed on in the 50th minute of the match and your teammates can only smirk at each other knowing that not only were they going to witness your famous cold-hearted style but they were also definitely going to walk away with a victory.

By the 80th minute Barca were already up 7-0 and when you score your second goal of the match, your debut for Barcelona, it is Aitana who reaches you first. She jumps into your open arms, clinging on as she realizes just how much higher off the ground she is than she expected.

“VAMOS!!” she screams into your face, a shout that you can only reciprocate as you get back into position.

Your debut for the team is one for the books as you walk away with three goals and an assist, Barca winning 9-0 and Aitana is immediately by your side, her arm circling your waist as the two of you walk back to the locker room. Apart from Frido and the midfielder hanging off you, the rest of the team is shocked to see a soft smile on your face as you pay close attention to everything Aitana says instead of the hard expression you had only minutes ago.

“How the hell does she switch so fast?!” Patri whispers as she watches you and Aitana, the way you beam down at the brunette who’s talking more than she’s ever had before.

“That’s Kvinna Zlatanera for you” Rolfö muses from next to her.

“She was a damn beast out there!” Ana-maria praises with a nod of her head.

By the time you get out of the shower room you’re one of the last ones in the changing room, the others presumably already on the bus or giving post match interviews. Not Aitana though, the girl is sitting next to your bag patiently waiting for you.

“You waited for me, Tana?” the way the nickname rolls off your tongue has her feeling all mushy as she gives you a nod, swinging her legs back and forth. You send her an appreciative look as you pack the last of your things, the brunette only watching as you do so.

“I’m glad you signed with us” she exclaims and you momentarily look her way.

“I wasn’t about to turn down Barcelona” you let out a small laugh, Aitana joining in with a chuckle. “But thank you, I’m happy to be here too” The reassuring smile you’re sporting has her feeling even more at ease, she enjoyed your presence.

“I wanted to give you something” she trails off as you swing the strap of your bag over your shoulder, herself standing up as well and she cranes her neck to look up at you.

You raise an eyebrow at her, waiting for her to continue as she steps forward. With her hands resting on your arms it’s only natural for you to hold onto her waist.

There’s a certain look on her face that you don’t understand until your eyes connect and a deep blush creeps up your neck. Aitana stands on her tippy toes as you lean down a bit and she melts into you as you place a soft lingering kiss on her lips. It’s her turn to blush now and she hides her face into your shoulder, grinning against the material of your shirt. Your chest rumbles with a sweet giggle and you pull her out the door by her hand and to the bus, the midfielder’s smile never leaving her face. 

You were definitely more than happy to be at Barcelona.

[lynzishell]

Prev // Next

Transcript:

Dawn: I wasn’t sure if you were going to come this week. Atlas: Why wouldn’t we? Dawn: I don’t know. You’ve been hard to get a hold of lately.

Atlas: Sorry about that, just a lot going on, but we’re here now. Dawn: I’m glad you are because—Aw Ash, what happened? Asher: Oh, nothing. Just me being clumsy. How are you guys? Dawn: We’re good! Um, we actually have some news. Atlas: What’s going on?

Dawn: We’re gonna have a baby! Atlas: What?! Really? You’re pregnant? Dawn: It’s still pretty early, so we’re not telling anyone else yet, but yes, I’m pregnant! Atlas: And everything’s okay? Dawn: So far so good. We even heard the heartbeat, Atlas, it was the most perfect thing.

Atlas: That’s incredible, I’m so happy for you! Asher: Congratulations!

Atlas: So, how have you been feeling? Dawn: Not bad so far. Atlas: That’s good! Is there anything you need? Anything we can do? Dawn: I don’t know. Honestly, I’m feeling a bit lost. Sometimes I can’t help but wish… I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m trying to say.

Phoenix: So, the eye, what really happened? Asher: [smirks] Hm. It’s a long story. Phoenix: I’ve got time.

Atlas: What is it? Dawn: I keep finding myself wishing I had mom around. God, I hate saying that out loud. Atlas: What good would she do? Dawn: I don’t know. None probably. Just wish I had a mom, I guess, not her specifically. The thing is, I don’t really have any close friendships with women, let alone anyone that’s had a baby. I just wish I had someone that could tell me what to do or what to expect, or that I could talk to about pregnancy and baby stuff. You guys are all great, but...

Atlas: No, I get it. Dawn:  You don’t think it’s stupid? Atlas: Of course not. In fact, you should come to Brindleton Bay with us sometime. You could meet Asher’s mom and sister. They’re both super sweet, and I’m sure they’d love to meet you. And you could meet Spencer. Dawn: Really? I don’t want to intrude. Atlas: You wouldn’t be!

Phoenix: Jesus. Asher. Right? Phoenix: For what it’s worth, I’d be doing the same thing. Asher: You would? Atlas thinks I should stay out of it. Phoenix: That’s just because his priority is you. He’s always gonna fight to keep you safe.

Asher: I guess. But I don’t want us to be fighting about it all the time. Iris is already pissed at me, the last thing I want is for Atlas to get fed up with me too. Phoenix: Then maybe listen to him. Like I said, in your shoes, I’d be doing the same thing. But I also would never let anything come between me and Dawn. Asher: [sighs] Phoenix: You and your sister are close? Asher: Yeah.

Phoenix: Then smooth things over with her. All you can really do is let her know you’re there for her. If something happens then step in, but you can’t let this guy drive a wedge between you and the people who are important to you. I’m sure with your sister, your parents, and the social worker looking out for her, you can trust that Spencer will be kept safe.

Asher: Probably. Things were just so much better when he was in jail, I wish he’d go back. Phoenix: Yeah, well, that’s not really in your control. Asher: Apparently not. Atlas: Hey Ash! C’mere for a sec. Asher: ‘kay! Thanks Phoenix. Phoenix: Anytime.

Asher: What’s up? Atlas: I was just telling Dawn that she should come to the Bay with us. Thought it would be nice for her to meet your mom and Iris, talk about baby stuff.   Asher: Sure, they’d love that! Oh, and if you’re still looking for a place, I can show you the idea I had for your wedding. Unless you’re set on getting married in the city. Dawn: No, we’re open to ideas. Asher: Cool, we’ll let you know next time we go.

[ghosttotheparty]

a mess of holy things 13 also on ao3 // prev // next cw: brief meltdown; subdrop/panic attack during sex; death of guardian (not wayne don’t worry); grief; mentions of child abuse & childhood trauma

“No, I’m just saying you’re turning into a slut,” Robin says lightly, her voice garbled from the gummy bear between her teeth as she tears its head off. She’s laying on her bed with her legs up against the wall, her hair spread around her head.

Steve rolls his eyes.

“Yeah, I know.”

“How many times have you had sex now?” she asks, rolling her head to look at him, nibbling at the body of the gummy bear now. He shrugs.

“I don’t know. A few.”

She raises her eyebrows.

He raises his back.

“Is it good?” Robin asks lightly, reaching back to the bag of gummy bears that’s resting on her belly. “You’re not getting bored of it?”

Steve scoffs, his head falling back against the wall.

“God, no. Don’t think I could get bored of it.”

She hums for a moment, looking at the ceiling.

“Maybe the guy I was with was just really bad,” she says thoughtfully, and Steve lets out a laugh. “Because it was real boring.”

“Have you considered having sex with a woman?” Steve questions sarcastically.

“Oh, yes, I have,” she says. Steve giggles, reaching over to take some gummy bears. “I just need a woman that also wants to have sex with me.”

“Hm.”

They’re quiet for a moment, and Steve thinks. He doesn’t know very many women.

“Is Nancy dating Jonathan?” he wonders aloud abruptly. “Or like…”

“Honestly, I have no idea,” Robin says. “I keep thinking she’s dating Jonathan, but then Argyle will come over and kiss her to say hi, and then Nancy wears one of Jonathan’s shirts but she’s got Argyle hair ties around her wrist… I don’t know.”

“You don’t wanna just ask?”

“Eh.” She shrugs. “Not really a big deal. They’re all happy, you know?”

Steve hums and looks at the ceiling again. He thinks some more. Maybe Chrissy is single.

They’d like each other, he thinks. They’re both silly, funny in their own ways, and they don’t really match exactly, Robin’s rough flannels and mismatched socks and choppy hair that she cut with scissors in her own bathroom compared to Chrissy’s frilly blouses and manicured nails and pink lipstick. But Steve has a feeling they’d like each other.

“Do your parents know about you?” he asks after a moment. She’s quiet.

“Yeah.”

He looks at her. She isn’t eating the gummy bears anymore, but she’s holding one in her fingers, squeezing and squishing it, brushing it against her lips absently.

“How did that go?” he asks quietly.

She sighs heavily, clearing her throat.

“Uh…” Another exhale. “I don’t know. I just told them at dinner one night. Kinda randomly, I just… couldn’t keep it hidden anymore.”

“What did they say?”

Robin looks at the ceiling blankly.

“‘…Don’t tell Grandma.’”

Steve blinks, waiting for her to continue, but she just lifts the gummy bear to her mouth and tears its head off with her teeth.

“That’s it?”

“Mhmm.” She takes another breath. “We don’t talk about it. It just kinda hangs out with us, I guess.”

He looks across the room and thinks some more. About what it might be like if his parents knew. If the fact just dangled around their heads, unaddressed, ignored. If they could do that, just ignore what they would surely despise.

“Are you gonna tell your parents?” Robin asks softly, like she can read his fucking mind. He scoffs.

“I don’t know,” he mutters. “Don’t know if it’s worth it.”

She looks at him, lifting her chin to see him.

“They won’t understand,” he says quietly. “They won’t get it.”

She sits up. Swings her legs around to rest across his lap, letting the gummy bears fall to the side. She’s looking at him curiously, silently.

Steve sighs, letting his head fall to the wall.

“…They raised me to be God-fearing,” he says quietly. “And… pure. They raised me so, like, intentionally… good. And if I tell them, I…” Steve scoffs, laughing humourlessly. “‘Hey, by the way, I’m an atheist and I like it when my metalhead boyfriend shoves his cock up my ass and puts his fingers down my throat.’”

Robin lets out a laugh, and he half-smiles.

“They don’t have to know all of that.”

“That’s all they will know, though,” he says weakly, his smile falling. She looks at him in confusion, furrowing her eyebrows, frowning. He sighs.

“They view homosexuality as… disgusting,” he says after a moment. “It’s just sexual to them. It’s just sin on sin.”

His fingers twist together, and then he reaches for the cross around his neck, lifting it to touch his lips absently.

“If I say I have a boyfriend…” He pauses, his voice weak and soft. “They won’t think about us holding hands or teasing each other or being sweet with each other. They won’t think about…” He cuts off, his throat tightening. “About how he wipes my tears away like he’s scared he’ll break me. Or the way he pulls me closer even when he’s, like, fully asleep. Or the way he cooks for me when I mention I haven’t eaten, or the way he kisses my temples when I have a headache.”

He looks at the ceiling, blinking tears back rapidly when his eyes sting. Robin reaches and holds his forearm.

“They’ll think about us sinning,” he says weakly. “They’ll think about— about him corrupting me, or manipulating me, and— and it’s bullshit, because he hasn’t. He’s— He’s so great.”

“He sounds really great,” Robin says, and her voice sounds thick now, and he hates this, this bullshit that unites the two of them.

“They’ll never see how great he is,” Steve says heavily. Robin’s hand is warm on his arm. “They’ll never get it. They’ll take one look at him and do the fucking Sign of the Cross. I don’t…”

He sighs again, reaching over to take her hand, twisting their fingers together.

“If I tell them… I don’t know what they’ll do. But I think… I don’t know. If the love they have for me is worth keeping. You know?”

She nods. Sighs. Squeezes his arm.

“It sucks,” he says softly, whispering. “Knowing your parents don’t love you the way you want.”

He glances at her when he hears a sniffle, and there’s a tear falling down her cheek. He wipes it away, but she doesn’t seem to notice, her eyes downcast and glassy.

“It sucks,” she says, her voice breaking a little bit. “My own parents don’t love me. Don’t know who can.”

It sends a shard of glass through Steve’s chest. That Robin fucking Buckley can’t see how loveable she is, how precious. How amazing and perfect, and…

“I can,” Steve says quietly.

She looks at him, her eyes shining, gleaming, her lips pursed like she’s trying to stop them from quivering.

“…Really?”

He nods, tilting his head at her.

“You’re my best friend,” he says softly. “You’re so cool.”

She scoffs, sniffling, and her hand tightens on his, squeezing his fingers. Her eyes close, and another tear falls down her cheek, and then Steve’s eyes are burning, and he tugs her closer by her hand.

Their arms wrap around each other, and Steve squeezes his eyes shut, burying his face in her neck. Her shoulders shake when she sobs quietly, and he runs a hand down her back, over the wrinkles in her sweater.

And he feels kind of like he did when Eddie first started being sweet on him, touching him lightly, calling him pet names. It’s different with Robin, of course. Still warm. Familiar. Entirely platonic but somehow more.

They stay there together, arms around each other, legs tangled, as they talk. Robin tells him about every girl she’s ever had a crush on. Steve runs his hand through her hair until it’s untangled as he listens, feeling the way her jaw shifts as she talks and chews the gummy bears. The sun sets outside, the sky dimming, and neither of them moves except to flick on the lamp on Robin’s bedside.

It’s warm here. Safe. Steve lets himself exist quietly with Robin, lets himself become sleepy and giggly and a little bit childish, because she’s doing the same, wrapped in a blanket and rocking back and forth as they laugh about nothing. He thinks that even if their parents can’t love them properly, maybe it doesn’t really matter at the moment. It doesn’t really matter if they have each other.

─────────────────

Steve wakes up before the sun rises.

It’s Saturday. Eddie had been working at the Hideout, but he’s in bed now, hair damp from his shower, eyes closed peacefully. Steve looks at him in the dark, rolling onto his side to face him.

He hadn’t woken up when Eddie came back after work. Eddie must have been as quiet as possible, taking off his jacket and setting his keys down, getting fresh clothes and taking a shower, all while Steve slept peacefully in bed. He isn’t even touching Steve right now. There’s a space between them, a chasm that makes Steve ache.

He pauses, looking at Eddie. At the fan of his eyelashes across his pale cheeks, at the metal studs in his skin. At his cheek that’s squished against his hand, tucked between his face and his pillow. At the strands of hair on his skin.

“Eddie,” Steve whispers softly, hesitantly. He doesn’t expect a response, but Eddie’s eyes flutter open slowly after a moment, and he looks at Steve blearily, tiredly, his eyes not quite all the way open.

“Hm?” Eddie shifts, closing his eyes for a moment before he blinks them open again. “You okay?”

“Mhmm.” Steve gazes at him. “Missed you.”

Eddie smiles sleepily, humming, lifting his chin a little bit, and Steve moves closer, close enough that their noses nudge together. Eddie exhales slowly, and Steve thinks for a moment that he’s fallen back asleep, but his arm moves, sliding from between them to wrap around Steve’s waist. His hand presses into the small of his back, and he tugs him closer.

Steve kisses him, smiling, tucking his hands between them, shrinking against Eddie’s body as their lips part. Eddie hums again, fingers spreading over Steve’s back.

“Sweet baby,” Eddie murmurs when they separate, his lips brushing Steve’s. Steve smiles again, his cheeks flushing with warmth. He sighs, nuzzling into Eddie’s throat as Eddie rubs his back once more.

He could whisper it right now. Right here. Lips pressed to Eddie’s tattooed skin, Eddie’s heartbeat against his hands.

He doesn’t say anything.

─────────────────

Steve sits on the sofa while Eddie finishes putting away the groceries.

He’d cried in the grocery store. He doesn’t know why.

His cheeks are still tacky with tears, and he feels fucking exhausted for no reason at all. All he’s done today is go with Eddie to the grocery store, and he’d managed to ignore the way the overhead lights buzzed and made his head ache, the way the squeaky wheels of other peoples’ carts scratched at the inside of his skull. Until someone passing bumped into him, their shoulders knocking together, and he just burst into tears like a child.

Eddie almost dropped their basket, setting it down and quickly, gently, pulling Steve aside, his voice hushed as he asked what was wrong, what happened, but Steve didn’t have an answer. Nothing happened. Nothing was wrong. He was just crying.

Eddie gave him the keys to wait in the van while he finished up shopping, and Steve took them quietly. He’s been quiet since. Stared out the window in the car as Eddie drove, only tearing his glassy eyes away from the world going by when Eddie’s hand landed on his thigh gently, squeezing and holding him.

Steve squeezes his eyes shut as they start to sting again, his head falling to the back of the sofa. He’s tucked into himself, arms crossed over his belly, knees drawn up, and he listens to Eddie in the kitchen, opening and closing cabinets, balling up plastic bags and stuffing them into a drawer.

It goes quiet after a few minutes. And then the couch shifts as Eddie sits next to Steve carefully.

“Hey, baby.”

Steve opens his eyes and looks at him, rolling his head, before he lifts his head.

“Hi,” he says softly, whispering.

“What’s goin’ on?” Eddie asks gently, leaning against the back of the sofa. Steve looks away, across the room, shrugging. “Did something happen?”

“No,” Steve chokes, eyes watering again. “I just…” He shrugs, sniffling. “Feel like shit today. I don’t know.”

“What do you need?” Eddie asks softly.

Steve is quiet, shrugging again, and Eddie just waits for him.

“…Hold me.”

Eddie moves without hesitation, wrapping his arms around him tightly, pulling him close and running his hand over his head carefully. Steve falls against him, squeezing his eyes shut again. His breath shudders. Eddie hushes him gently.

“Breathe for me,” he whispers softly. “Nice and slow, baby, you got it.”

Steve takes a deep breath, reaching to cling to Eddie’s shirt, and Eddie’s arms tighten around him, his hands pressing to him firmly before one of them slides into his hair and tugs.

Steve sags against Eddie, exhaling sharply.

“Harder.”

Eddie’s fingers twist into his hair and pull so it hurts. Steve exhales again.

“There you go,” Eddie murmurs. “That’s it, baby.”

Steve whines weakly, face burning as he buries his face in Eddie’s neck, but Eddie just holds him. Pulls his hair. Rubs his back.

“Just want you to touch me,” Steve says when he can speak again, whispering.

“You wanna get off?”

Steve pauses. And then shakes his head.

“Just want your hands on me.”

“C’mere.”

He pulls Steve closer, shifting to sit sideways on the sofa, legs outstretched, and Steve lets him manhandle him gently, lets him pull him so he’s laying on his chest, their legs entwined.

“There we go,” Eddie murmurs. His hands run over Steve’s back gently, tracing his spine. “Good?”

Steve hums, nuzzling into his neck, hands tucked against his chest.

“Harder,” he says softly.

Eddie’s hands press more firmly, pushing Steve against him, and Steve bites his lips to stifle a groan.

“Let it out,” Eddie murmurs. “‘S okay.”

Steve whimpers weakly, pressing closer as Eddie’s hands squeeze his hips firmly. It hurts a little, but Steve likes it. It makes his mind go a little fuzzy, makes whatever is squeezing his chest so tight a little looser. He hums.

“That’s okay?” Eddie checks after a moment, his hands loosening. Steve nods, reaching back to find Eddie’s hand blindly, and he leads it down to his ass, pressing firmly. “Right here?”

Steve nods again.

“Please.”

Eddie kisses the side of his head, and his hands are strong as they press into Steve’s flesh through the fabric of his pants. Squeezing and pushing and gripping like he’s massaging his ass and his thighs, and Steve melts against him, brows furrowed as he focuses on the feeling of Eddie’s fingers on him. He presses his hand to Eddie’s chest and then slides it up to his neck, pressing against his pulse.

“Feel good?” Eddie asks softly. Steve nods.

“‘S, like… grounding,” he mumbles, his hand falling lax on Eddie’s neck loosely. “Like it.”

Eddie hums quietly, his voice rumbling above Steve’s head.

“Bet you’re having fun,” Steve mumbles after a moment, and Eddie scoffs, a sound that makes Steve smile.

“I definitely am.”

His hands squeezes again, and then one of them lifts and taps Steve’s ass lightly, absently, but Steve fucking lights up inside. He hums, his back arching.

“Yeah?” Eddie says, sounding a little surprised.

“Mm. Yeah. Please.”

Eddie laughs softly, doing it again.

“You want me to spank you, baby?”

Steve nods desperately, back arching again.

“Please.”

Eddie kisses his head again, his fingers tightening on his ass, squeezing hard.

“You’re so sweet.”

Steve nods absently, letting out a weak yelp when Eddie’s hand lands on his ass abruptly, hard.

“Color?”

“Green. Again. Please.”

“I got you, baby.”

He does it again. And then again. Alternating hands, rubbing and soothing in between slaps, and they’re both hard, but Steve doesn’t think it really matters. He feels like he might fucking fall asleep here, despite Eddie’s hands forcing feeling into him, despite the way particularly hard hits jostle him.

“Okay?” Eddie asks after a few minutes, hands rubbing over where Steve’s ass is blooming with warmth.

“Please don’t stop,” Steve mumbles weakly, sleepily. “Feels so good.”

Eddie’s hands squeeze tightly. And then one retreats before it slides under Steve’s pants, pressing to his bare skin. Steve whines, nodding before Eddie can ask.

Eddie pushes his pants down carefully, smoothing his hands over Steve’s ass.

“Color,” he says softly, whispering.

“Green.”

“‘S gonna hurt more without fabric in the way.”

“I know,” Steve mumbles. “‘S okay, I want it.”

“Tell me why first.”

Steve exhales sharply, swallowing the lump that’s formed in his throat, and he takes a slow breath.

“Just…” He pauses, pressing his cheek to Eddie’s shoulder, gazing at the bat’s wing around his neck. “Wanna feel it.”

“Why?” Eddie whispers.

“Need it,” Steve says, almost whining. “Need to feel it. When we were in the— the grocery store, there was too much,” he says, his voice softening. “The lights, and the noises, and my— my jacket, and the guy bumping into me, it was just… too much. When it hurts, just— just a little, I can feel it. ‘N I don’t have to feel anything else.”

“Baby,” Eddie breathes.

His hand lands on Steve’s ass with a sharp slap, and Steve jumps with a startled Oh!

Eddie’s hand smooths over the skin gently, squeezing and soothing, and Steve nods, breathless.

The skin of his ass feels hot when Eddie finally stops, rubbing his hips and sliding a hand under his shirt to press into the small of his back. Steve is shaking a little bit, breathing hard into Eddie’s neck, fists clenched in the fabric of his shirt.

“Okay?”

Steve nods, letting out a weak whine.

“Thank you,” he says breathlessly. Eddie turns his head to kiss his temple, humming softly.

“Of course, baby,” he whispers. “You know I’d give you anything.”

Steve nods again, smiling.

Eddie starts to pull Steve’s pants back up, but the fabric scrapes over his no doubt reddened skin, and Steve hisses, wincing. Eddie lets out a thoughtful noise before he holds Steve’s waist, pushing him to the side carefully.

“Stay here a moment,” he says, shifting to get up so Steve can lay on his front on the sofa. Steve groans, reaching for him half-heartedly as he stands, and Eddie laughs lightly, catching his hand and bending down to press a kiss to his knuckles.

He comes back with a bottle of lotion, and he sits on the edge of the sofa next to Steve’s legs. Steve closes his eyes and sighs as he listens to the click of the bottle before Eddie's hand, cold with lotion, smooths over the hot skin. Steve’s breath catches in his throat, and he hums.

“So beautiful,” Eddie murmurs, leaning to press a gentle kiss to his ass. “My perfect boy.”

He pulls Steve’s pants up carefully, slowly, tugging them so they don’t slide over his skin, and he smooths out the waistband of his underwear by tucking his fingers under it and running them along the elastic.

“Maybe we need to get you some silky panties so it doesn’t hurt.”

Steve giggles into the sofa, cheeks warm.

“Could be cute.”

“It would be very cute,” Eddie says lightly. He smooths his hand over Steve’s ass gently, tenderly. “You feel okay?”

“Mhmm.” Steve sighs. “C’mere.”

Eddie moves back onto the sofa and Steve shifts to give him space, settling with his head on Eddie’s chest. Eddie runs his hands through his hair and then over his back, more gently than before.

“Wanna stay here for a little while?” Eddie asks softly. “And then I can go start lunch?”

Steve nods, sighing.

“Yes please.”

Eddie kisses the top of his head, and Steve suppresses a smile, sliding a hand down to slip it under the hem of Eddie’s shirt. Eddie hisses a little when his cold fingertips find his skin, and Steve snickers.

“Sorry.”

“I don’t think you are.”

“Mm.”

Eddie plays with his hair. He breathes.

Steve likes it when he breathes. Which is probably the most insane thing he’s ever thought to himself, but it’s true. It’s almost reassuring to hear Eddie’s breath, to feel the rise and fall of his chest. Steve wishes he could listen to it all the time, wishes it could play on repeat in the back of his mind. He wishes it was possible to get a sound tattooed.

“Do you wanna go out this weekend?” Eddie asks abruptly.

“…Out?”

“Yeah,” Eddie says, and he sounds shy all of a sudden, like he’s nervous. “Like— Like on a date.”

Steve lifts his head, looking down at him. Eddie’s cheeks are pink.

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Eddie says again, glancing away, taking a breath. “I just… I just realized we’ve never actually been on a date, and…” He looks up at Steve, his tongue flashing over his bottom lip. “I know a place that’s… that’s, like, queer friendly.”

Steve blinks, smiling slowly.

“…Really?”

“Yeah.”

Eddie smiles, tilting his head at him like he’s fond, like Steve is a cute puppy or something.

“You wanna go out with me?” he asks lightly. Steve suppresses his smile but he can’t, and it grows into a bright grin, and it’s the first time he’s actually smiled all day. Eddie’s eyes drop to his mouth, his expression lighting up like he’s realizing it too.

“Yes,” Steve says, shifting to lay on top of Eddie’s body, their legs entwined, their chests pressing, and Steve’s heart feels like it’s beating harder, like it’s trying to reach Eddie’s through their skin and the fabric of their shirts. “I wanna go out with you.”

Eddie suppresses his own smile.

“Okay.”

He lays back down, kissing Eddie jaw and then his neck, biting teasingly when Eddie’s hand tugs at his hair.

The date is on Friday. They go to a diner that’s just outside the city, on the corner of a block in a colorful neighborhood. Eddie parks the van out front as Steve looks at the building, at the glowing OPEN sign in the window. It looks quiet, a little bit empty; there are a few people sitting at the bar, sipping from white mugs and looking at newspapers and notebooks, and there are two women sitting behind one of the windows, across from each other, laughing. There’s a pink triangle on the entry door.

Eddie holds the door open for Steve, tilting his head politely as Steve passes by him with a suppressed smile, and the woman behind the counter glances up at them when the bell above the door dings cheerfully. Eddie’s hand takes Steve’s, lacing their fingers and pulling to lead him to a booth in the back.

They sit across from each other after taking off their jackets, and Steve looks around again. There are flashes of color everywhere he looks even though it’s mostly brown inside; the seats of the booths are a muted teal, and there are glowing neon signs on one of the walls, reading things like girls girls girls and soups & sandwiches. There are gumball machines and a pinball machine and there’s bunting draping in the air over the door to the kitchen. It’s made up of small American flags, but when Steve looks a little closer he realizes the flags are upside down.

When Steve looks at Eddie again, he’s resting his chin on his hand, watching Steve with a small smile.

“Hi,” Steve says shyly, leaning over the table to look at him, mirroring him with his chin on his hand.

“Hi,” Eddie says softly. “What do you think?”

Steve glances around again.

“‘S nice,” he says before hesitating for a brief moment. “You don’t think they’ll mind that…”

“That they’ve got queers for patrons?”

Steve scoffs.

“Yeah.”

“Nah,” Eddie says softly. “They don’t mind.” He looks past Steve, hesitating before he gestures with a tilting his head. “See those ladies over there?”

Steve looks over his shoulder at the women sitting by the window. They’re holding hands across the table, and their ankles are locked, and Steve can only see one of their faces from where he’s sitting, but she’s beaming so brightly it’s like she’s reflecting the other woman’s expression.

“Oh,” he says softly.

“Yeah.”

Steve looks at Eddie again, biting his lip, and he crosses his arms over the top of the table, hiding his hands. His eyes scan Eddie’s content smile, his hands resting on the tabletop and holding his chin. Steve starts to pull his hand out from where it’s tucked against himself but he stops, hesitating, his stomach flipping. Eddie’s smile grows.

“Go ‘head,” he says softly.

Steve suppresses a smile, biting his lip again as he pulls his hand away and reaches across the table, grabbing Eddie’s and pulling it toward himself. Eddie bites back a laugh, amused. Their fingers twist until Steve is holding onto Eddie’s middle and ring fingers, holding them loosely before he squeezes absently, nervously. Eddie brushes his thumb over Steve’s fingers gently. Steve looks away.

“Hiya, boys.”

Steve jumps at the sound of the waitress’s voice, looking up as she approaches their table and sets two menus in front of them. He starts to pull his hand away, but Eddie squeezes, tugging it back in place.

“Can I get you started with any drinks?” she asks lightly. She’s smiling at them, like she doesn’t even see them holding hands.

“Uh,” Eddie says, looking at Steve with raised eyebrows.

“Do— Do you have orange soda?” Steve asks, looking up at her again, and she nods before looking at Eddie.

“Ginger ale.”

She nods.

Steve exhales as she walks away, her ponytail swinging behind her, her shoes clicking on the floor, and Eddie squeezes his hand again.

“Hey,” he says softly, and Steve looks at him. “We’re okay.”

Steve nods, taking a deep breath, squeezing his hand.

“We’re okay.”

They only let go of each other’s hands when their food comes, and Eddie immediately kicks at Steve’s feet to prompt him to move them forward so they can lock their ankles together. Steve feels like he’s thirteen or something, his cheeks flushed with heat because his crush is touching him. It’s ridiculous. But Eddie keeps grinning at him across the table like he knows.

They get pie to share. It’s stupid. Almost embarrassing, especially when Eddie grabs a paper napkin and reaches over to wipe Steve’s chin himself. Steve rolls his eyes and snatches it from him as Eddie giggles. His lips are stained red.

Steve is fucking obsessed with him.

He clings to Eddie’s arm as they leave, no longer scared of being seen, almost wanting it now. Wanting people to look over their mugs and hovering forks to see these two boys, these two men, fingers laced, cheeks warm. Wanting people to see exactly how Steve feels, exactly how his heart beats in time with Eddie’s, how his veins are twisted and tangled in the shape of Eddie’s name.

Eddie holds his hand in the car. Steve can barely tear his eyes away from him, gazing at the side of his face, at the lines in his skin that deepen when he smiles after glancing back at Steve.

“What is it?” he asks, his voice light as he slows at a stop sign and looks both ways, leaning to see past Steve.

Steve shrugs even though he isn’t looking at him.

“I really like you.”

His voice is small.

Eddie’s smile widens.

“I really like you too, baby.”

Steve squeezes his hand, grinning, and he sighs heavily, waiting. Eddie pulls his hand away from Steve’s to turn the van into the parking lot outside his building, and Steve whines petulantly, which just makes Eddie laugh.

“Gimme a second, honey.”

Steve sighs, waiting, and he could swear Eddie is doing this on purpose, pulling into a parking spot and then pulling out again, straightening the van, pulling in again, pulling out. Steve scoffs and hits his head against the headrest, rolling his eyes.

“You’re so annoying.”

“Don’t wanna take up someone else’s spot.”

“Mhmm.”

Eddie is smiling as he finally stops the van and pulls the keys out the ignition, and he turns to look at Steve, eyebrows raised.

“You’re pouting?”

“…No.”

“Baby.”

Steve looks at him. And kisses him, leaning across the center console and crashing their mouths together. Eddie laughs, turning to hold his face. He reaches to unbuckle Steve’s seatbelt;t before doing his own, and Steve just tilts his head to kiss him deeper and he scrambles out of the seatbelt. Eddie hums, caressing his cheeks.

“Wanna go inside?” he mumbles between kisses. “Hm?”

“Mhmm,” Steve hums, nodding, but he doesn’t pull away, his breath catching when Eddie tugs on his lower lip.

“C’mon.”

Eddie holds his hand as he leads him upstairs, their fingers locked. It’s a little dark, the lights lining the stairwell dimmer than they should be. They’re quiet, not even whispering to each other as they ascend the stairs, and Steve steps up close to Eddie as he’s unlocking the door, pressing his face against his shoulder.

They’re kissing before the door is even shut behind them, before Eddie’s even flicked the lights on, and they kick their shoes off, shove their jackets off, clutch at each other. The inside of Eddie’s mouth tastes like cherry pie, sweet and sugary and fucking delicious.

Steve wraps his arms around Eddie’s neck and lifts onto his tiptoes, groaning when Eddie grabs his thighs and lifts him up. Eddie grabs his ass when his legs wrap around his hips, reaching to put one hand on the wall to steady himself as he makes his way to his room with Steve clinging to him.

They pull the clothing off each other’s bodies, breathing hard, touching and kissing and licking, and Steve keeps thinking there’s no way he can ever feel what he’s felt before, what he felt the first time Eddie pressed into his body, but the sun is somehow shining down on him even though it’s the middle of the night and they’re hidden in Eddie’s bedroom. Eddie holds his hand, clutching tightly as he opens Steve up tenderly, as he sucks kisses into the sensitive skin of his inner thighs.

Steve’s hand is tight in Eddie’s hair, holding on like he’ll float away if he lets go of him.

He’s whimpering, whining and moaning, and Eddie’s fingers feel so fucking good inside him, moving slowly, gently, carefully, fucking in and out of him, forcing soft noises into the air. Steve bites his lip, squeezing his eyes shut and exhaling sharply.

When he opens his eyes, he can’t see. His vision is blurred, the light from the lamp suddenly brighter than it usually is.

He opens his mouth for a breath, but there’s something on his chest, keeping his lungs from filling, and a tear escapes his eye. His hand clenches in Eddie’s hair hard.

“Baby?”

Steve exhales sharply.

Eddie moves up over his body, hovering over Steve, and Steve can’t let go of his hair. His hand is clenched tightly, shaking, and he can’t let go. He’s gripping so hard he’s probably, definitely hurting Eddie, and he can’t let go.

“What’s your color?”

Eddie’s voice is muffled, like Steve is underwater, like there’s something between them. Steve’s eyes blink, stinging,

“Steve. Color.”

Steve exhales again, and his voice is weak, cracking like a thin layer of ice when he finally says, “Red.”

Eddie’s fingers pull out of him, and Steve wants to protest, to whine Come back, but he can’t get any other words out.

“Come here,” Eddie says softly, kindly, and Steve squeezes his eyes shut, tears falling down his face, into his hair. Eddie holds Steve’s hand where it’s stuck in his hair, and Steve tries to let go, but he can’t.

“I’m sorry,” he says weakly, almost whispering. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I—”

“Steve,” Eddie says firmly, pulling him to sit up. “Don’t apologize, baby, it’s okay. We’re all done.”

Steve takes a stuttering breath, opening his eyes to look at him desperately. Eddie is looking at him tenderly, nodding when Steve inhales, and he’s so beautiful Steve starts to cry again. Eddie reaches up to gently detach Steve’s hand from his hair, and Steve closes his eyes tightly, trying to loosen his hand. Eddie holds his clenched fist in his hand, running his thumb over his knuckles.

“Baby,” Eddie says softly. “Look at me.”

Steve opens his eyes.

“You wanna get dressed?”

Steve pauses, looking at him, and then he nods.

Eddie leans to grab their clothes from where they’re discarded next to the bed. He sits up with a hoodie in his hand, one that was on the floor within reach. He lets go of Steve’s hand to help him get dressed, to help him pull his boxers on and tug Eddie’s hoodie on over his head before he dresses himself as well.

Steve covers his face in his hands, trying to hide, and he weakens even more when Eddie touches him, when he runs his hands over his arms gently, squeezing.

“Stevie, baby…”

“I’m sorry,” Steve chokes, his voice muffled. “I’m so sorry, baby, I— I don’t—”

Eddie shushes him gently, pushing his fingers through his hair.

“Steve, sweetheart, come here.” He pulls him in so their foreheads press together, and he caresses his cheeks, nudging their noses together. “Breathe,” he says softly, whispering. “It’s okay.”

Steve sniffles, reaching to hold his waist, gripping the fabric of his shirt tightly. He tries to breathe, to inhale slowly, normally, but it doesn’t work, and his breath gets caught in his throat, choking him.

“You got it,” Eddie murmurs.

When Steve exhales smoothly, Eddie lifts his head and looks at him, smoothing his hair out of the way carefully, gently.

“I’m sorry,” Steve breathes. Eddie shakes his head patiently.

“You don’t have to be sorry.”

“But…”

But it was a good night.

They’d gone on an actual date, and Steve had had fun, he’d held his boyfriend’s hand in public without worrying, without being scared. He’d kissed him in the car and giggled and blushed, and everything was fucking fine.

“Look at me,” Eddie says firmly, and Steve lifts his head, his vision blurring. Eddie is looking at him intently, tenderly. “You don’t have to apologize,” he says gently. “You didn’t do anything wrong, you understand?”

“But…”

“But nothing, baby,” Eddie says, leaning forward in emphasis. “You did so good for me, okay?”

Steve’s eyes flutter as he blinks tears out of his eyes.

“I’m so proud of you,” Eddie whispers. “I’m not upset at all, Stevie, okay?”

It must be clear on his face that Steve doesn’t believe him. Because it doesn’t make sense that Eddie wouldn’t be upset; Steve’s ruined their night. There’s no way Eddie isn’t at least disappointed.

“Steve,” Eddie murmurs. “Baby.”

Steve looks at him again, letting him wipe his tears and cradle his jaw.

“I would be upset if you didn’t say anything,” Eddie says gently. “If you didn’t stop me, and you just… let me keep going even though you didn’t want to.” His voice sounds tight. “Okay? You never, ever have to apologize for stopping anything. If it’s… If it’s sex, or if you don’t feel like talking, or if you don’t feel like being touched— anything. You understand?”

And something about the way his voice sounds, so firm, almost demanding, almost authoritative, makes Steve feel a little lightheaded. Makes him melt into his hands.

He’s so nice.

“Stevie,” Eddie says softly. “If you decide that you never wanna have sex with me ever again, that’s okay.”

Steve almost pouts, his head tilting, and Eddie smiles weakly, his thumbs brushing over Steve’s cheeks.

“That’s okay,” Eddie says adamantly, shaking Steve’s head gently, playfully. “You don’t ever have to do anything you don’t want to, okay? ”

Steve nods weakly.

Eddie leans in again, nudging their noses together.

“You don’t ever have to apologize for not wanting something,” he says softly. “For saying no or telling me to stop or asking for more time or fucking anything, you understand me?”

Steve nods, his eyes fluttering again. Eddie holds his jaw and shakes his head playfully again, and it’s kind of condescending, kind of mean, but it makes Steve’s mind go blank.

“You understand me?” Eddie asks again, more intently, waiting for a verbal response.

Steve isn’t thinking. His skull is full of static.

“Yes, sir.”

Eddie blinks.

And Steve’s own voice catches up to him. His face flushes with heat, and his eyes burn.

“I’m—”

“Don’t you dare apologize,” Eddie says, half-smiling now. “Don’t you fucking dare.”

Steve scoffs weakly, but he’s crying again, embarrassed, and Eddie wipes his tears away, leaning in to kiss his forehead before he lowers his head to press his forehead to it.

“Is that what you wanna call me, baby?” he murmurs. Steve’s stomach flutters. He nods. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Steve says, his voice weak again. It’s almost a whine.

“That’s okay,” Eddie whispers. “You can call me that.”

“But it’s weird,” Steve says quietly, shyly, and Eddie huffs out a laugh.

“You know I don’t mind weird.”

Steve smiles weakly.

“I like it,” Eddie whispers softly, the end of his nose brushing Steve’s. “I love taking care of you, baby.”

Steve nods, closing his eyes, exhaling slowly, and their noses brush again.

“I love taking care of you,” Eddie repeats intently.

Steve tilts his head and lifts his chin to kiss him softly, and Eddie lets him, humming quietly and holding his face like he’s something precious.

Eddie guides him to rest on his shoulder when they part, and Steve sighs, melting against him.

“Okay?” Eddie asks softly. Steve nods.

“…Thank you, sir.”

“Of course, baby boy,” Eddie murmurs, and he kisses Steve’s head, running his hands over his spine, and Steve think he might be fucking fine.

─────────────────

Steve’s hair is damp with rain as he makes his way up the stairs to Eddie’s apartment. He feels heavy; his jacket is almost soaked, and his jeans are sticking to his legs, and his bag is weighing his shoulders down. He lets it drop to his elbow before dropping it to the ground as he stops outside Eddie’s door.

Eddie answers within just a few seconds, and Steve smiles, tilting his head at him as Eddie steps aside for him to come inside, but something is off. Eddie’s smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Steve asks, dropping his bag next to the pile of shoes by the door, letting Eddie take his jacket. Eddie scoffs, his expression lightening.

“Nothing?”

Steve gives him a look as he toes his shoes off, kicking them aside.

“What’s going on?”

“Uh,” Eddie sighs, an eyebrow raising as he looks Steve up and down, half-smiling. “You don’t have an umbrella?”

“Don’t change the subject,” Steve says lightly, moving closer, setting his arms over Eddie’s shoulders and playing with the curls that have escaped the bun his hair is in. Eddie holds his waist easily. “Also yes, I do, but I forgot it.”

“Ah.” Eddie sighs heavily, slowly, his eyes skimming Steve’s face. “Wayne called.”

Steve blinks. His stomach twists.

He’s never met Wayne. Never even talked on the phone with him. But he loves him.

Eddie has endless stories about it, about his collections of mugs and trucker hats and bottle openers, about his banjo and the quilts that litter his living room. About how he’d stay up with Eddie to help him with his homework or to listen to him rant about whatever book he was reading or whatever campaign he was planning. About how he came home one day and threw a brand-new hairbrush at Eddie a while after he started growing his hair out. About how sweet he’s always been, how loving.

“Is he okay?” he asks, his eyes widening. “What happened?”

“He’s fine,” Eddie says quickly, smiling, shaking his head, pressing a hand into the small of Steve’s back. “He’s fine, it’s just…”

Steve stares at him as he hesitates, his lips parted like he’s going to speak even though he doesn’t say anything. Steve touches his face, brushing his thumbs over his cheeks. His eyes look a little bit red.

“It’s Linda,” Eddie says after a few moments, his hands holding Steve’s waist firmly like he’s steadying himself on him. Steve freezes. “She, uhm. She had a heart attack. She didn’t make it.”

He takes a deep breath, exhaling slowly, shakily, nodding his head absently. His eyes are glassy.

“How do you feel?” Steve asks softly.

Eddie inhales, laughing humourlessly, letting out a shaky, “Uh…”

“Baby,” Steve says, and Eddie meets his eyes. His eyelashes flutter as he blinks tears back, and his tongue swipes over his lower lip briefly. Steve slides his hands down to his arms.

“Come here,” he says softly, reaching for Eddie’s hand, and he pulls him along gently as he goes to the living room. Eddie follows quietly, sniffling, and Steve’s chest hurts. He pushes him to sit on the sofa, and Eddie falls on it heavily, looking up at Steve helplessly as Steve lowers to sit on his lap, his knees on either side of his hips. “Okay?”

Eddie nods, his mouth quirking into a tired smile. Steve sets his hands on his neck, tracing light lines over his skin.

“Tell me,” he whispers.

Eddie closes his eyes and takes a slow deep breath, relaxing against the back of the sofa and lifts his hands to rest them on Steve’s thighs.

“I, uhm…” He opens his eyes, but they’re hazy, glassy, trained on the collar of Steve’s shirt. It’s a plain t-shirt, grey and loose-fitted, but it’s nothing Steve would ever have worn even a year ago. The cross on Steve’s necklace is hidden behind the fabric. “I don’t know how to feel.”

His hands are kneading Steve’s thighs gently, absently, like he’s fidgeting.

“What are you feeling right now?” Steve asks softly. Eddie pauses before he shrugs.

“Just… I don’t know.” His voice cracks. He looks at Steve, looking into his eyes for a moment before he looks away again, squeezing Steve’s hips. “I’m… Sad. But. I don’t know.” He shrugs again, shaking his head. His head falls against the back of the sofa.

Steve brushes his thumb over his throat lightly, his heart aching.

“I feel angry?” Eddie says after a moment, his expression shifting into confusion. “I don’t— I don’t know why, it— it’s like she slighted me or something, I don’t…” He does that laugh again, that awful laugh that grates on Steve’s skin, that laugh that’s void of joy. “I don’t know.”

“You’re allowed to feel angry,” Steve says quietly, tucking a loose wisp of hair behind his ear. The tunnels through his earlobes are black today.

“It’s not just anger,” Eddie breathes, his hands sliding up to Steve’s waist like he’s pleading with him. “I… I feel relieved.”

He whispers it. Like it’s a secret. Like he’s ashamed.

“That’s okay,” Steve whispers back, but Eddie shakes his head, blinking rapidly.

“It’s not,” he breathes. Steve takes a breath to say something, but Eddie speaks again. “She’s dead. I— How can I feel, like, content with it?”

“She was cruel to you,” Steve interrupts, leaning down with emphasis. “She was mean. You have every right to feel relieved that you don’t have to worry about her anymore.”

Eddie’s head falls back again and he sighs, looking at the ceiling. His eyelashes are wet. Steve traces the bat on his neck, caressing its grotesque face, its intricate wings. Eddie’s hands squeeze his waist, kneading and holding him tightly.

“Talk to me,” Steve says after a few moments. Eddie takes another deep breath.

“Uhm,” he says. His voice wavers, and Steve hates seeing him like this, hates seeing him sad. “I saw her a few years ago.”

Steve nods, caressing his neck.

“I was nineteen. Wayne had… Wayne had had an accident at the plant,” Eddie continues, steeling himself. “He was injured. It wasn’t, like… He was on bed rest, you know? And when he called me, I just… I panicked. I’d only lived away from him a little while, and I just… I went to him. Just in case.”

Steve smiles fondly, nodding. Of course Eddie would go to him.

“He couldn’t really walk. He was still… I mean. Wayne’s a character. He kept tellin’ me I didn’t need to go all the way down there, but he… I could tell he was happy I was there.”

Steve’s smile grows. Eddie’s accent always grows heavier when he talks about his hometown or Wayne. Steve likes hearing his accent.

“So one day, I was…” Eddie sighs. “I was in the kitchen fixin’ up some tea. Wayne was in bed with a book. He took my room after I left town.” Steve nods. “And, uhm… There was a knock.”

He slips a hand under the hem of Steve’s shirt, pressing to his skin. His hand is warm.

“I thought it was gonna be, like, a neighbor, or— or one of Wayne’s work buddies, but it was—” He cuts off, choking on his own voice, and Steve’s stomach hurts. “It was Linda.”

He pauses for a moment, slipping his tongue over his lips, kneading the soft flesh above Steve’s waistband.

“She didn’t recognize me at first,” he says quietly. “I, like, froze when I saw her, and she— she just stared at me. And I could— I could see the exact moment she realized who I was, I mean she, like… Her eyes went all wide. And she looked me up and down, and I— I remember I was wearing just a black hoodie, but she looked at it like…”

“Yeah,” Steve says softly when he doesn’t finish.

“I’d had these done,” Eddie says, lifting a hand and touching one of the piercings on his lower lip. “And I had, uhm, one here,” he says, touching the side of his nose. “I let it close a while ago, but it was, uhm, just a silver hoop.”

Steve nods, smiling.

“She… She just stared at me, and neither of us knew what to do.” Eddie looks at Steve’s chest again, his eyes glassy, and it’s like he’s zoned out completely, like he’s barely even there. “She had a, uhm, like a casserole dish, and a— a Bible. And I just kinda stared for a moment. And then she, uhm, like, snapped at me about… You’re not gonna let me in?”

Steve sighs.

“And I just said no.”

Steve scoffs, and Eddie’s expression lightens. He looks up at Steve’s face, his hands tightening on his waist.

“And I asked what she wanted, and she told me she heard Wayne was hurt so she came by to see him, and I… We started arguing. And Wayne came out of his room to see what the fuss was, and he was— he was limping, and hobbling, and Linda and I both, like scolded him for getting out of bed. And for this… brief moment, we were… one in the same.”

Steve’s expression tightens. His lips purse.

“Wayne saw the Bible she was holding,” Eddie continues. “And he…” He half-smiles, tilting his head fondly even though he’s just staring into space. “Goddammit, Linda,” he says in a clear impression of Wayne, his voice gravelly, his accent thicker. Steve smiles. “I told you I don’t want that shit in my house.

“I helped Wayne back to bed,” Eddie continues. “And Linda let herself in. Started to heat up the casserole. I told Wayne to stay put, you know, that I’d deal with her.”

“I assume she didn’t go easily,” Steve says. Eddie shakes his head.

“She, uhm… She argued. Told me she just wanted to speak with Wayne, say a prayer for his health. I told her Wayne wasn’t interested.” He trails off into silence, chewing on his lip. “…She said she wanted to help me, too, but… but that I was already too far gone.”

Steve blinks. Recognizes the words from Eddie’s thigh.

“I told her to leave.” Eddie blinks, looking up at Steve. His lip trembles, and his eyes fill with tears. “That was the last time I saw her.”

Steve touches his cheek. Eddie turns his face into it, taking a stuttering breath.

“I’m sorry, baby,” he says softly. Eddie blinks his eyes open, shrugging again. “Eddie.”

“I feel like shit,” Eddie says, a tear falling down his cheek, his voice shaking. “I hate feeling like this, like— like I’m fucking vindicated or something. Like this is justice.” His eyes are wide like he’s desperate to say this, like he needs Steve to hear him. “She’s dead. I should be, like, grieving, but I’m not,” he says despite the tears on his face, despite the trembling of his hands.

“Eddie,” Steve says firmly, holding his face. Eddie’s tears run down his fingers, dampening his skin, and Steve thinks he could use the tears as holy water, could use them to bless himself, to purify himself. “There’s nothing wrong with what you’re feeling.”

Eddie’s breath shudders as he exhales. He looks up at Steve like he’s helpless, like he’s listening like his life depends on it.

“She abused you,” Steve says after hesitating for a moment. “She was cruel. She used God to use you. You have every right to be glad she’s gone. Okay?”

Eddie’s eyes flutter. Steve wipes his tears away tenderly.

“Whatever you’re feeling is fine,” Steve murmurs. “You can be angry, and you can be sad, and you can be happy, it’s… It’s all fine.” He looks him in the eye. He looks tired. “Okay?”

Eddie’s eyes blink at him. His hands are still trembling a little bit.

“…I love you.”

Steve almost startles, blinking, freezing, and Eddie’s expression doesn’t change; he’s still gazing up at Steve, looking at him like he’s fucking reverent.

“I know it…” Eddie pauses, taking a breath. “I know this is really bad timing, but I…” His eyes flutter, and he presses his lips together, hesitating.

Steve leans down and kisses him. It’s a slow kiss, gentle and lingering, and Eddie’s hands slide around to the small of his back, holding him close. When Steve pulls away, he stays close, their noses nudging, their foreheads pressing.

“I love you too,” he says quietly, whispering. “It’s okay.”

Eddie exhales shakily, and he lets out a quiet sob, and it tears through Steve’s body, rips him to shreds right in Eddie’s lap. He kisses him again, holding his face gently, pushing a hand into his hair when Eddie gasps into his mouth. Eddie wraps his arms around his waist, holding him tightly, pressing them together so close Steve feels like their skin might melt together.

Eddie makes a soft noise, a weak groan that slips between Steve’s lips and rumbles into his chest. Steve whines back, his arms wrapping around Eddie’s neck, his back arching when Eddie kisses him harder, biting and sucking on his lip, and it’s like the air in the room has suddenly become hazy. Eddie lifts a hand to grab Steve’s throat, holding him in place as he licks into his mouth.

Steve hums, keening, slumping against him, nodding when Eddie pulls away for a brief moment to look at him. He doesn’t let go of Steve’s throat, squeezing a little bit as his other hand slides around to his back, pushing under his shirt and rubbing his skin. Steve reaches to hold his wrist, gasping for breath, cheeks warm. Eddie is harder under him, and Steve’s blood is rushing.

“Eddie,” he gasps when they part.

“Mm.”

“Do you… Do you wanna have sex?” he asks breathlessly. Eddie grins, his teeth nipping at Steve’s lip.

“Yeah.”

“Are you sure?” Steve asks, pulling away to look at him. His hair is already a mess, and his cheeks are pink, and his eyes are glassy again, but it’s a better shine than before.

“Yes,” he says softly.

“Can we do it here?”

“Do you want…”

“I’ll go get it,” Steve says quickly when Eddie’s hands set on his hips like he’s going to nudge him to get up. “Wait here.”

Eddie smiles lazily, softly.

“Okay.”

Steve goes quickly, tugging his shirt off on his way and tossing it aside as he grabs the lube and a condom from Eddie’s bedside table. They’re sitting in plain view, next to a half-full glass of water and a book Eddie’s been reading, and the sight of them, so casual, so easy, makes Steve happy somehow.

Eddie is pulling his own shirt off when Steve goes back to him, and Steve tosses the lube and condom to the sofa next to him before unzipping his jeans as Eddie watches, hair even messier than before, frizzy and staticy from his shirt. It’s a relief when Steve finally peels his jeans off his legs; they’re still a little damp, but he hadn’t noticed the discomfort until now. Eddie lifts his hips to pull his jeans and boxers down his hips, pushing them to his knees before reaching for Steve, who takes his hand as he kicks aside his clothes.

He falls onto Eddie’s lap again with a sharp exhale as their bodies meet. Eddie’s skin is warm.

“I love you,” Steve breathes, pressing their foreheads together as Eddie reaches for the lube and tugs at the small of Steve’s back to make him arch it. “I love you so much, sir.”

“God, I love you too, baby,” Eddie whispers. The lube bottle clicks twice, and Steve lets out a weak sound when Eddie’s finger presses to his hole, cold with lube. “I’m so fucking grateful for you.”

Steve whines, wrapping his arms around Eddie’s neck, hiding his face, groaning when Eddie squeezes at his ass, spreading him open. They’re both quiet as Eddie fingers him open, his fingers pushing and prodding, spreading his fingers and making Steve ache in the best way, except the occasional whisper, the soft brush of Eddie’s breath on Steve’s bare skin.

Is that good?

Fuck, yes, sir.

Steve groans when he feels ready, when the heat in his stomach is threatening to overflow, and he reaches back to swat at Eddie’s hand, whining a weak Please.

He lifts onto his knees for Eddie to roll the condom on and spread lube over himself, and he looks down at Eddie, who looks back up at him. They just look at each other for a moment, eyes shining, lips parted as they pant. And then Steve kisses him so hard their teeth clash, and Eddie groans, squeezing his ass. They don’t pull away, feeling blindly for Steve to lower himself onto Eddie, and he moans into Eddie’s mouth as he does.

“Mm, God, Eddie.”

“Fuck.”

Steve lets out a sound that’s high in his throat, breathy and weak, and Eddie’s hands spread over his waist, holding him in place for a moment. He’s trembling now, shaking as he clings to Eddie’s shoulders.

“Shit,” he breathes sharply. “You’re so— You’re so fucking deep—”

Eddie hums, gripping Steve tightly, and they pause there, staying for a moment.

Until Steve shifts on his knees with a weak whines, rising and then lowering, his eyes squeezed shut so tightly he might get a headache. He sounds pathetic.

He moves faster after a few moments, arms wrapping around Eddie’s neck, face buried and hidden, his voice muffled as he whines and pants and groans as Eddie touches him, holds him. Eddie’s hips shift for a brief moment, rising to meet Steve’s movements, and it presses him even deeper, and Steve lets out a fucking wail.

“You okay?” Eddie asks breathlessly, pausing. Steve grinds down against him, whining, breathing hard, nodding into his neck.

“Green, fuck, Eddie,” he whines. “Please, sir, please, please—”

Eddie slides down the sofa a little bit, holding Steve’s hips tightly, keeping him in place, and he fucks him, looking up at him, watching closely, carefully. Steve whines. He’s rambling, mumbling fucking deliriously even as he listens to Eddie’s soft voice, murmuring to him.

“My good boy,” he says softly, so fucking softly. “My baby boy, you’re so perfect.”

Steve sobs, pushing a hand into Eddie’s hair, holding it tightly as he gasps for breath, moving against Eddie’s body, winding his hips, tucking his face into Eddie’s neck. He can feel Eddie’s breath on his shoulder, warm and soft and comforting.

“Fuck, that’s it,” Eddie says roughly, hands gripping Steve’s hips so tightly it might bruise, when Steve moves again, up and down, and Steve groans at the sound of their skin meeting, soft slaps that fill the air like mist. “That’s my boy, there you go, baby.”

Steve whines, and there are tears on his face now. Eddie tugs at his hair to make him lift his head, and he gazes at him for a moment before he pulls him in, and he licks Steve’s tears away, and maybe he thinks the same about Steve’s tears that Steve thinks about his. Steve groans, his eyes closing again as Eddie’s tongue slides over his cheek, as his hand pulls his hair and his other hand squeezes his ass.

Steve grinds against him, reaching up to hold Eddie’s face weakly, his fingertips pressing into his cheeks.

Their faces are pressed together, breath mixing in the air, bodies moving desperately.

“I love you,” Steve breathes. “I love you, sir—”

Eddie whines, licking his jaw before his hand lands on Steve’s ass sharply, the sound ringing out around the room like it’s empty, like there’s an echo.

“I love you too,” he whispers roughly. “Fucking beyond words, baby, I can’t even fucking tell you—”

Steve comes with the words caught in his throat, choking on them as he repeats them again and again and again and again, like a mantra. Like a prayer.

Eddie says it back. Again and again and again and again.

They get dressed slowly. Quietly. Eddie pushes Steve’s hair back after helping him pull on a sweater, and Steve pushes him gently so his back is to Steve, so he can pull his curls back into a ponytail.

Eddie makes coffee. Steve hugs his waist as he pours it into two mugs, resting his face against his back between his shoulder blades, his cheek squishing against him. He can smell the fabric of his shirt, and it’s nice.

They sit in the living room, on the sofa, and then Eddie looks up at Steve, his eyebrows taut.

“Do you… Would you mind if I smoked a cigarette?” he asks. He looks shy.

Steve shakes his head, smiling, and he reaches to set his mug aside.

“Where are they?” he asks as he gets up. Eddie looks up at him, and his eyes are shining again as he smiles.

“Uh, I have a pack in the drawer there,” he says, gesturing to the table by the sofa. “There’s a lighter there too. I’ll open a window.”

They sit on the windowsill, blankets wrapped around themselves, mugs set between them.

Steve holds up a cigarette for him, and Eddie leans to take it between his lips, suppressing a smile. Steve fiddles with the lighter for a moment, staring at it, and Eddie reaches silently to show him, moving his hand so he can flick the lighter and tilt his hand without burning his thumb. Steve tilts his head as he holds the light out, as Eddie leans in and inhales, puffing smoke out of his mouth as he leans back again.

Steve sips his coffee as Eddie smokes, leaning against the window. The glass is cold even through the fabric of his sweater and the blanket that’s wrapped around him, but he doesn’t mind. He gazes at Eddie, watches the end of his cigarette glow brightly, watches the smoke drift around his head and out the window that he’s opened. Eddie drains his coffee and tapes the cigarette ash into the empty mug.

“How do you feel?” Steve asks softly when their eyes meet.

“Better,” Eddie says. His voice is soft, quiet, almost shy. He smiles.

“Do you wanna talk about her?”

Eddie shrugs, taking a drag, sighing the smoke out of his lungs.

“I just…” He’s quiet for a moment, looking out the window, watching the world outside for a moment. “I was so young when I lived with them. And it just feels like… like there’s still this little boy somewhere inside me that went into hiding because of them.”

Steve nods, holding his mug to his face so the steam is on his skin. He wishes he could take it all away from Eddie, wishes he could reach into his chest and pull out all the heartache and sadness. Eddie is quiet, looking at the windowsill between them. It’s white, the paint chipping at the corner of the wood.

“I keep having to remind myself that I didn’t deserve it,” Eddie says quietly. “All the shit they gave me.”

And Steve doesn’t know what to say.

He’s reminded of the things Eddie’s said to him about Steve’s own parents, about the way they talk to him, the way they touch him.

“They turned me into someone else,” Eddie says quietly, tapping the cigarette on the mug again, sighing. “I wasn’t the same when I left their house as when I moved in.”

He looks up at Steve, and he looks like he wants to laugh like that again, to dismiss it and change the subject, to pretend he’s fine. But after a moment, his eyes are gleaming, watering again, and his lip quivers even as he twists his mouth to suppress it. He shrugs, blinking his eyes, tilting his head, and he looks so small Steve wants to tuck him into his chest to keep him safe.

“I was so soft before them,” Eddie says, his voice just a breath, and Steve’s chest splits open.

His eyes burn suddenly, and he nods, blinking tears back.

“I’m sorry they stole that from you,” he says softly.

He pauses for a moment before he leans in, through the air that smells like cigarette smoke, over his mug, and he touches Eddie’s face with his free hand, holding him as he kisses him gently. They linger there, eyelashes fluttering against each other’s cheeks, before Steve pulls away and looks at him, touching his cheek.

He takes a deep breath, looking at Eddie’s piercings on his mouth, looking at the bat on his throat, at the subtle reddish bruise that’s hidden in the bat’s wing from Steve’s teeth. He slides his hand down to Eddie’s chest and presses over his heart like he’s trying to feel the heat of his blood.

“He’s still in here,” he says quietly, looking at his hand pressing over Eddie’s sweater. “Little Eddie.”

Eddie suppresses a smile, sniffling, putting his hand over Steve’s like he’s holding it in place.

“We can… We can make him feel safe now,” Steve says, looking into Eddie’s eyes. “He can exist without being scared now. At home.”

Eddie’s smile wavers. His hand presses harder over Steve’s.

“I love you so much.”

Steve kisses him again, tasting coffee and cigarettes on his tongue.

“I love you so much too.”

♡ permanent taglist: @estrellami-1 @theplantscientist @spectrum-spectrum @carlprocastinator1000 @starman-jpg @romantiklen @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme ♡ holy things taglist: @stevesbipanic @pearynice @ao3whore @slowandsteddie @swordsandflowercrowns @dragonmama76 @mikeys-thoughts @sofadofax @cyranyx @kazalohiku @lostonceandneverfound @strangerfreaks @bitchysteveharrington @nailbatanddungeon @newtstabber (comment to be added/removed to/from either list!!)

♡ art of steve and eddie ♡ pinboard // playlist ♡ buy me a coffee

[stevesbipanic]

Under the Tree

Finally my contribution for @thefreakandthehair spicy six winter challenge. This was a lot of fun, my prompt was “Um, I got you something.” / “You got me something?” Hope you enjoy!

The first Christmas after the defeat of Vecna was an important one. It was the first Christmas that they didn’t have to worry about seeing flickering lights or brandishing weapons. The kids could be kids, and the adults could be too.

Steve Harrington could count on one hand the number of good Christmas’ he could remember. He assumed that the Christmas’ before he was 5 were adequate enough, but, the year he turned 5 he remembers his mother baking gingerbread with him and his dad playing basketball with him out on the driveway Christmas morning. They never would again. When he was 19, he spent Christmas with the Buckley’s. It was a warm Christmas filled with love and laughter; one he’ll treasure forever. This year, age 20, Steve hopes to add another good Christmas to his collection.

Joyce insisted on hosting, and no one was going to tell her no. After all, the Hopper-Byers now lived in a beautiful house just on the edge of the woods, you could bike to Hopper’s old cabin which had now been turned into a sort of club house for the kids, Hellfire was regularly held there now that Eddie had graduated. Steve had spent all of November getting gifts for his family, not his parents, he hadn’t heard from them since they sold the house and moved to Washington after the earthquake. No, his real family, he spent weeks making sure everyone got the perfect gift. He had had to hide Robin’s gift at Dustin’s now that he shared an apartment with her and was quite the snoop, not that Steve minded, he liked how intertwined their lives were. He had thought of hiding it at Nancy’s new place, but she had become less tight-lipped about secrets since her and Robin had gotten together.

That was another new thing, Robin and Nancy, the two who fell together so perfectly after everything that happened. Steve was the least surprised, when they told him he’d claimed it made sense due to him having great taste in women, they knew he was joking. Steve knew because he could see how well the two of the complimented each other. Nancy was patient and happy to listen and let Robin work through a problem by rambling. Robin was supportive but tough when it came to both Nancy’s goals but also her health. They had both taken gap years to revaluate their goals and desires while also taking a well-deserved break. The future could wait another year for them to have time to heal hidden wounds.

Steve was glad there was no bad blood between them and Jonathan, they’d all repaired their relationships over the years, figuring out platonic and romantic loves and wants, Steve could call Jonathan his brother (he was suspicious that Joyce had filled out adoption papers somewhere) and let old demons lie. With Jonathan had come Argyle, someone Steve didn’t know how the party went so long without. Argyle was a steadying presence, reminding them that they’re not defined by what happened to them and telling deep truths, usually high but the fact still stood. Steve was glad the two of them had each other, he could see years of emotional weight be lifted off Jon’s shoulders whenever Argyle was around.

Even the kids had matured, and not just in the way that trauma matures someone. Steve could see them let go of childish desires like the first love romance between Mike and El that grew into more a relationship like Steve and Nancy, stronger as friends. Dustin still called Suzie every weekend but Steve knew they both had a good head on their shoulders, he liked to think any kid that came from them would probably solve all the world’s problems in a day. Lucas and Max had worked so much on their communication, understanding each other’s needs now more than ever.

Maybe it’s why Steve had spent so long making sure they all had the perfect gift. A small part of Steve that still held doubt, a grain of doubt so rooted inside of him from childhood that it may never leave. The part of him that worried about being forgotten and left behind, the part of him that drove him to always be useful. He’d gotten high with Eddie in the first week of December and poured his heart out to him about it, Eddie hadn’t said anything in reply, he hadn’t needed to, Steve could see in his eyes they shared the same fears.

Eddie’s gift had been the most important, for reasons Steve could only confront in the safety of his own apartment, huddled under blankets with Robin late at night. Reasons that simultaneously made him feel whole and completely exposed. In the end the gift had been a mixtape, a perfect blend of their music tastes woven together with Steve telling Eddie about how the songs make him feel, about life, about Eddie, ending with his final confession. Steve hopes he doesn’t hear it until he gets home.

The party is in full swing, it had snowed the night before leaving plenty of soft snow to play in, distracting the kids from asking about presents until after dinner. They had all gathered around the tree, slowly but surely passing out gifts. Hugs and thanks were shared amongst the group, Steve felt his heart fill with warmth with every piece of gratitude or handmade card sent his way. Eddie’s eyes had twinkled when he’d read the tape’s description as being “Eddie’s Mix”, a promise for later dancing across his features. Paper picked up and clothes changed, the kids had settled in front of the television with mattress’ pulled from every room. Joyce and Hopper had retired with promises of making breakfast in the morning. The remaining two couples had either joined the kids or disappeared for their own festive celebration, leaving only Eddie and Steve finishing the dishes in the kitchen.

“So, a mix tape, Stevie? Do I have to worry about an hour long “Last Christmas” brainwashing?”

Steve had laughed putting away the last plate, Eddie had come over to help wrap presents and Steve’s record had gotten caught on the same track, they both nearly lost their minds.

“I can’t promise no Wham! but I think Last Christmas has had enough of a turn this year, Eds.”

Eddie smiled and took the edge of Steve’s sweater in his hands, grabbing a blanket and leading Steve out onto the porch. The two boys sat in the cold, huddled together under the blanket, listening to the quiet of the woods. The quiet brought them so much peace, no calls for help, no creatures to go bump in the night, just them and their heartbeats.

“Um, I got you something.”

“You got me something?” 

Eddie chuckled, “Of course I did, sweetheart, just didn’t want to put it with the rest of the gifts, didn’t think it would fit.”

Steve raised an eyebrow at this, “What is it?”

Eddie looked nervous now, slowly he pulled off one of his rings, it was one of the simpler ones. Steve always thought it stood out against the skulls and horror of the others. A small black stone set in silver, vines slicing through the metal. Eddie took Steve’s hand and slid the ring onto his finger.

“You always play with this one when you’re upset about something, figured it’d be better if you had it even when I wasn’t around.”

Steve felt seen, Eddie had comforted him through a lot after March, offering words and touch and even his ring to make Steve feel better.

“Eddie. Thank you.”

“Of course, Stevie.”

“But wait, how couldn’t this fit under the tree?”

“Well, there’s a second part to it, if you want it.”

Steve had missed many things in his life, but he didn’t miss the question in Eddie’s eyes.

“I’d really like the rest of my gift, Eddie.”

Eddie leant in slowly, still giving Steve the opportunity to move away, to say no, to leave Eddie behind. Steve didn’t though, he was never going to leave Eddie behind, would never forget him. Their lips touched, cold from the night air, and it felt like the final puzzle slotting into place. Eventually, they pulled away, just enough to catch their breath, foreheads still touching.

“Yeah, you would’ve looked weird with a bow on your head under the tree.”

“Maybe next year I’ll do it just for you.”

Steve smiled, he couldn’t wait for next year, and every year after that he got to spend with Eddie.

[bowiebond]

Billy who thought he was gay having a full blown crisis over his growing crush on the Queen of Hawkins, Stevie aka Stephanie (🙄) Harrington.

At first he’s shocked because, how could that be? Billy has never been truly interested in women, even if he had slept with more than a few (whether it was for survival/manipulation/reputation, etc). Sure, a holes a hole, but he’s never wanted to kiss one. To hold a girls hand and take her for a joyride in his car, do couple shit. Actually found her attractive.

Though, Stevie isn’t really a girly girl. She’s got cropped short hair that’s almost a mullet, only just taller than him, wears boxy jumpers and polos that make her shoulders broader than most girls. She’s boyish, a total tomboy really, and he’s surprised she was popular in a small hick town when she…well she acts and dresses like a butch.

She seems like a total ‘carpet muncher’ (as coined by the basketball team) and Billy’s crush seems even dumber and more unattainable when he finds out she lost her popularity status and her ‘good looks’ because she was outed; she had been dating Nancy Wheeler. The girl seemed to get out of the fire scott-free though when she jumped ship to Jonathan Byers.

Stevie had been left to burn in the towns snide comments even when she had almost had an out, ditching her old friends after they sprayed ‘dyke wheeler’ on the movie cinema. Turns out she threw herself under the bus after she got into a fist fight with Nancy’s new piece, Jonathan.

So not only was he a gay man apparently in love with a lesbian, but the object of his affections was already hated by most of the town. Apparently the only reason she didn’t get disowned was because she claimed to like boys too and would stick to them. Probably a bold faced lie, but if it wasn’t…

Billy wouldn’t pursue her. He couldn’t. Surely not. She wasn’t a guy and Billy hadn’t spent years in grief over him being gay to just find the ‘right girl’ for him.

Except he stews on the thought. It would be perfect, wouldn’t it? His life would be easier if Stevie really was just the right girl he was waiting for. It’s the only thing that makes him pursue her.

She’s cold and bitter towards him at first, not trusting it, but Billy can tell he’s wearing her down, bit by bit, enticing small smiles and soft chuckles.

Stevie’s not a prude it seems. He takes her on the joyride he had been dreaming about and he is vibrating from how happy he is around her, can’t explain it for the life of him, and she crawls into his lap the moment he turns the car off, parked at the quarry with the intent of star gazing maybe, or throwing rocks and shit. Whatever suited Stevie.

She kisses him like she’s starving, tugging the handle beside his seat to snap it back so she doesn’t hit her head on the roof of the car, her hands feeling every inch of him.

She doesn’t undress herself, just tugs her pants down her thighs and sits on his cock like it’s her throne, and Billy can see now why she was royalty once in Hawkins, that wicked smile of victory on her lips as she leans down to kiss him hard.

Billy’s pretty sure he’s in love and it’s embarrassing how quickly he’s fallen into it. Stevie and him aren’t a secret. In fact, him dating her both downgrades his status and lifts hers. They’re pretty much equals, entirely average now, thanks to their relationship.

And the sex; fuck, the sex is good. Billy didn’t think it would be. Sex with women in the past had been performative at best, all about looking good and trying not to wilt at their annoying moans, but Stevie never hesitant to push him around, take what she wants with low groans and breathy moans, and it sends a spark down his spine every time.

She’ll pull his hair, bite his lip, swear under her breath in a low voice - tell Billy how fucking filthy and pretty he is like Stevie’s not the pretty one…in a weirdly boyish way. Stevie’s not pretty in a girly way, but Billy’s not sure if he can say that to her face. It seems rude, but Stevie is kind of just…a handsome girl? He couldn’t explain it.

They had been dating five months when Stevie turns to him one night, the pair tucked in her flannel bed.

“…Would you ever date a guy?”

It makes Billy’s heart seize, but after a moment, Billy realises he doesn’t have to be scared of her. She liked both. Had never hid that part of herself from him or anyone really.

“Would you call me crazy if I said I thought I was gay before you?”

Stevie doesn’t answer. It’s too dark to see her face. But she does kiss him. Soft and tentative before she pressed harder, molded herself to him.

Billy expects another round. Expects to feel a wet heat around his cock like normal, but instead there’s spit-soaked fingers at his rim, poking, prodding, pushing in deep as his head swims with confusion and lust.

He cums on his girlfriends fingers twice that night and it’s the best thing he’s ever felt, even if he’s not entirely sure why she even wanted to do that. Most girls didn’t.

Stevie owns a bunch of old makeup she never wears anymore. Refuses to actually. But she’ll touch it if she can put it on Billy, sitting in his lap and applying blue shadow to his eyes. She’ll only wear gloss if it’s from his lips, kissing it off and tasting artificial strawberries with an appreciative hum.

Stevie has two closets. One filled with dresses and skirts and blouses, all collecting dust, and another with polos and khakis and a growing collection of jeans after Billy infected her style. He lost his leather jacket to her and he doesn’t regret it one bit. It looks better on her. Looks the best when it’s all Stevie is wearing, rutting her pussy against his leaking cock.

They’re seven months in when Stevie gets into his car in tears one day and just says, “I can’t do it anymore.”

Billy goes cold at the thought that she meant them. And in a way, she did, but it’s so much more complicated than Billy could possibly understand according to her.

So he opens himself to understanding. Drives them to her place and sits on her bed with her and waits. Says he’ll keep waiting until she says what she needs to.

“I…I don’t wanna be your girlfriend, Billy. I never wanted to be.” He wishes he had kicked her out of the car instead of staying now. Wishes he had saved himself the hurt of those words. Seven months of his everything had meant nothing and— “I wanna be your boyfriend.”

It’s confusing. Billy doesn’t really get it at first when he asks her to explain, but slowly it starts to click. Her clothes, her hair, her boyish charm, her…

His refusal to wear makeup. His ability to spawn butterflies in Billy’s stomach. Why he wasn’t exactly a pretty girl, but now, no, now Billy can see that Stevie — Steve — is a very pretty boy.

It takes a little adjusting. The names easy; Steve didn’t mind Stevie since he chose the nickname forever ago with the knowledge it was a little more boyish, but Billy changed up the pet names. Good girl because good boy, princess became pretty boy, Queen became King.

The pronouns get jumbled at times; it’s hard to switch from public to private mode in general for Billy, but he has the incentive to try until he gets it right because the discomfort on Steve’s face is enough of a reason too. Because he really does love him and wants him to be happy. God, he’s a sap.

Billy’s too stubborn to let a good thing go, even if he knows there would be hell to pay for the both of them if anyone knew. Billy hid being a queer for years; at least he can play straight with his boyfriend in public. They both can, for now. It’s nice to know he can still hold Steve’s hand while out and about.

They make plans to leave the moment Billy graduates — Billy insists he’s willing to leave earlier since he’s already 18 and he wants away from Neil, and Steve waiting another year to be who is really is away from Hawkins would probably suck ass. But Steve can wait. He waited 18 years. He can wait one more to be with Billy as his boyfriend instead of his girlfriend. Even gets Billy to move in now that he’s 18, so they don’t have to be apart during the night and the mornings before they both part ways for school and work.

Sex’s is even better now in Billy’s opinion. Mostly because now he gets to try stuff he always wanted to. Like eating his boyfriends ass until he’s shaking and crying from bliss, soaking down his thighs and dripping onto the bed. Steve practically falls apart in his arms the first time he fucks his ass, thick and hard as he dragged his cock in and out of his puffy, stretched out hole. It’s not enough to make him cum, but Billy manages to get him off after, tasting his own cum as it leaks out of his aching hole and dragging his tongue up through the soaked mess of Steve’s cunt to bring him to the brink.

Billy has all the fun in the world when they do finally ditch Hawkins. He gets to take Steve to a proper toy shop and gets him a strap on. Which is both a blessing and a curse because Steve annihilates all thoughts from his mushy brain after destroying his ass with the stamina he didn’t know he had, and Steve likes to just,,, wear it. Around the house. And it drives Billy crazy seeing those straps fastened on his hips as he walks around in low hanging grey sweatpants. He knows it’s the euphoria of having a dick for Steve, but Billy really wants Steve’s dick like, all the time, and his horny brain can’t seperate those two things, okay?

At the end of the day, Billy is pretty damn sure he’s gay. Steve tries to tell him he’s bi because he did like Steve when he was a girl, but the debates never really gets solved or concluded because Billy’s firm in his belief.

His heart and dick just knew Steve was a boy. Simple as that.

Steve will never get it, will always roll his eyes and kiss him because the sentiment does make him a little giddy, but Steve doesn’t have to get it.

Billy’s soul knew his soulmate was a boy. That’s why he fell for Steve. Simple. As. That.

[ryuichirou]

Replies

A couple of questions today! Replying to replies about other replies + a couple of shippy ones + the OruMal Anon is back with more juice lol

Anonymous asked:

Now, why would you say that? Now I’M thinking of Idia wearing just a jacket, thanks a lot

You’re very welcome lol Isn’t he perfect dressed like that? I mean, barely dressed.

Anonymous asked:

to the Idia plush anon, i'm so jealous~~ i thought the outfit Ortho would come with would show off his cheeks but it covers them instead orz i want to buy doll clothes that let him show them off, maybe even sew them myself. btw i think our plushies should kiss new

I demand pictures of kissing plushies… Anons irl meet-up just for the sake of kissing plushies lol

Also! Sewing clothes for a plushie yourself is such a cool thing to do. You’re cool, Anon.

Anonymous asked:

Marja is the epitome of a southern granny, and as someone who has three, I can tell ya they’ll kick your ass. Like I saw Marja and was wondering how Epel still thinks girls are weak when Marja is a badass, like that lil ol’ lady probably kicked his ass more often than Vil did and then told him to get his ass to the farm.

Exactly! Epel surely complains a whole lot for someone who’s been disciplined by this scary woman for his entire life lol

I think it’s also due to the fact that there aren’t any girls around his age (or any other kids) in Harveston, so ma and meemaw, as well as the rest of the women in the village feel as if they’re not quite the same thing as girls. Of course he knows that they are, but I feel like he still has this “yeah but this is different” idea in his head lol Which is kind of stupid, but Epel is still figuring things out so…

Anonymous asked:

Do you think any of the nrc students is interested in Trein (could be sexually or Romantically) ?🎤

I took some time to think about it, Anon, and I’m sorry to give you a disappointing answer: I can’t think of anyone who could be interested in Trein like that… Maybe we just haven’t seen them interact enough. But still, have three boys with the best potential when it comes to this:

Azul, because he wants to be the teacher’s pet very badly, and pretty much always has his tongue up Trein’s ass (metaphorically), but neither of them would see this as sexual or romantic. Azul wants to be the best because he is the best academically! Earned favouritism only!

Ortho, because he gets to hang out with Trein when Idia is taking tests! I don’t remember where we got this fact from, but it’s cute lol But then again, it isn’t either romantic or sexual thing…

Lilia, because you know. Talked about them here.

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

Do you think Rook ever goes down on Vil? You think he'll ever teach the ways of what to do down there to make the Queen shiver and cry out to Neige or Epel or ANYONE who's brave enough to actually be in Vil's bedchambers?

I think Rook lives down there. This is the base of his diet lol

Rook would be more than happy to teach someone the art of making Vil feel this good, both because mentoring someone in such a complicated craft is always rewarding, and because he is a possessive dick that doesn’t fully want Vil to be alone with someone else without him also being a part of the process somehow lol

Anonymous asked:

I'm glad a few people like my OruMal ask :)!! I was disappointed when I went through the ship tags on ao3 and found absolutely nothing. I just had to speak up 😔 I know most fans don't like to ship ortho, but c'mon, the POTENTIAL of it all!!!!!!!

With that in mind, heres a few more ideas I have 🥰

• With Malleus, it makes sense why he's interested. Ortho is a freak of nature to him!!! He'll get used to treating him like any other student, but then Ortho keeps doing the most strange and bizarre things, like he can just pull off his arms and legs as though it's nothing! He tries to think of it as though it's some kind of magic, but I imagine if he ever voiced that, Ortho would be like "oh, no, I can't use magic at all," and go into a long tangent about how it works and just perplex Malleus even more

• Why Ortho would be interested is a whole other can of worms. He does have a base level of curiosity for everyone, and that would apply to Malleus too, but is there anything more than that 🤔 if Malleus were actively pursuing him, I bet he would think his chances are certain that Ortho will reciprocate because he is an extremely powerful prince. Whatever reasons Ortho has for entertaining Malleus, I definitely don't think it will be what he expected. Probably because he's a bit of a loser... like his brother <3

• Holding my breath for book 7, but assuming nothing major happens between Ortho and Malleus (unlikely) then I actually think they will only consider each other seriously way after their days at NRC. They might have a fling while they're in college, sure, a bit of a flirt and tease and maybe a fuck or two if the mood is right, but there's so many other interesting boys here to see and do!! I think it will only be centuries later when they've both gotten tired of losing loved ones that they seek each other out, for the comfort more than the curiosity. They would tease each other for it, but I don't think either of them actually want to be left alone

• Malleus eventually learning to be a pillow princess and just sit there and starfish out while Ortho does his thing would be funny 😭 he likes to toy around, and Ortho seems to enjoy it when he plays with his motherboard, but... after enough times getting smoke and explosions directly to the face because he pressed the wrong button or pulled the wrong wire, he's unfortunately told to cool it 😔 honestly, he's lucky if he hasn't permanently damaged his core!!

That's all I have, thank you ❤️!!!!

Anon! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us again. Yeah, I can imagine how little Ortho-related stuff there is on Ao3, let alone stuff about him and Malleus, so we’re truly on a rareship territory here lol

I like the first two things that you’ve said because yeah, the mutual interest they would have for each other is a very nice fuel for their ship. Both of them are so curious, and quite experimental, so they’d have a lot to show each other and to talk about.

Oh my god the last one, Malleus don’t touch anything, you’ll just fry him again! Mister “I break every phone Lilia gives me” absolutely should not play around with Ortho’s motherboard… lol but it’ll still be a thrill for them, at least until it gets dangerous and Malleus is prohibited from touching anything ever again. But it’s okay, because Ortho is perfect at handling pillow princesses…

[midnightmah07]

I’m back again! Exams have been ok so far so that’s fun. 2 done 6 to go!

Anyways to the main subject of my ask: what’s your oc’s first impression to Daria and they’re current thoughts on her.

Also I decided for the sake of me adoring your oc’s, that Cyrus doesn’t despise Neige and just doesn’t really care for him. Is he civil and nice with him? Yes. Would he inconvenience himself for him? No.

(Btw saw your pfp and just, how we feeling about the new animation cause I wanna hold them in my hands they look so good😭)

IM CRYING I ACTUALLY LET OUT A GOOD CHUCKLE WHEN U SAID U CHANGED HOW CYRUS FEELS ABOUT NEIGE BC OF MY OCS RELATIONSHIPS WITH HIM HELP SKSKSJSKS

Also so happy for your exams!! Hope they keep going well!!<33

Hmmm ok I have only the info you posted about Daria, I think her strongest relationship out of my OCs would be with Isabelle bc that's her housewarden lmao. Because you said so much about Daria's slight arrogance (I think that's what's written there, I might have to double check later tho bc it's been a while since I read Daria's character info) and other very negative traits that she has Isabelle would probably get a headache with her rather often when she acted like this, in fact I think sometimes she would have to remember she's dealing with a dear student (she holds all her dorm members very dear and near her heart) and not Leona since they share some traits, but overall I think they would have a positive relationship outside of these headaches; Daria is inspired by Athena and you yourself said she's plenty smart, so that's something her and Isa have in common, I feel like they could get along pretty well!

Daisy's surrounded by screwed up people at NRC so this isn't news to her, + she always aspires to see the best in everyone because of what her parents taught her, so I feel like even if her relationship with Daria wasn't that deep, I feel like she would be intrigued and want to assume the best out of her

Jeanne............ Yeah she looks a Daria and gives her a thumbs up. Like idk why but my gut feeling is to say that even if Daria and Jeanne probably aren't close, Jeanne probably finds her interesting and admires how smart she is-- not as smart as her captain Leona tho sorry😋 jokes aside, she would low-key push Jamil to talk to her and stuff just so she could get Jamil off of her and Kalim's dates

Perse and her are...... Surprisingly similar? I mean they're both incredibly attractive women who are extremely smart and (if I'm not mistaken ofc) keep it to themselves. But exactly because of that I don't feel like Perse would have a strong opinion about her, maybe she could see her as a rival because Perse is rivaling Idia in Ignihyde and in the Island of Woe as the smartest people there; other than that, Perse is very closed off and puts walls around herself all the time so good luck getting those two to get closer than a simple "hi." "hey."

Also I'm pretty sure u weren't thinking about Jasper and Angus but I wanted to include them still :] I think they'd be both very wary of her, as they are with most strangers, but seeing how Daisy is supposedly only talking good things about Daria would lower their guard... Only by a little bit, if Daria ever does something to Daisy those two little mice are gonna make her pay lmaoo

[lane-ys-world]

Blank The Series - A BLANK slate?

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you put two stupidly attractive women in a television show and basically said “Make this show as disgustingly cute as humanly possible?”

No? Well then you clearly haven’t seen Blank The Series. Now, if you’ve been into GL (Girls Love/ Lesbian) dramas for a while now then maybe you’ve seen GAP The Series. If not, then it’s time to come out from the comfort of the rock you’ve been living under.

These two stories intersect due to the two sisters, Neung and Sam. After Song, the middle sister, tragically passes away following an argument with their grandmother over her sexuality, Song vows to never return to their family home and gets into a car accident on her way back to her girlfriend. Of course their grandmother, who has spent all this time raising them, rejects the relationship and then blames Song’s girlfriend for her death. The family is then divided with Neung blaming her grandmother for her sister’s death and Sam trying to just keep her remaining family together. Things come to a head, however, when Sam falls in love with a woman and their grandmother, set in her homophobic ways, tries to get Sam to marry a ‘nice boy’ she chose and deems worthy instead.

This backfires…greatly!

Sam, still wanting to keep the peace but also wanting to love who she loves, becomes a shell of herself before her grandmother’s eyes – unable to eat and incapable of engaging on any meaningful level with either her grandmother or her betrothed. This is when Nana realizes she’s gone too far and is at risk of losing her remaining granddaughter – because Neung booked it the minute she got her bearings and promised that she, too, would only ever return when her Nan was cold and due for a meeting with her maker.

Neung upon finding out that Sam was about to choose Granmama over the love of her life – they’re sisters, they still tell each other just about everything – decides it’s time to intervene and sticks her neck out for Sam in order to show her that her grandmother was the only person in the family getting anything out of the rules she was making and she expected everyone else to pretend to be happy with said rules – I’m paraphrasing, obvi. Well, fate or destiny or common freaking sense intervenes and gran takes her foot off Sam’s neck and ‘allows’ her to follow her heart – which leads Sam right back to Mon (her girlfriend).  Happy endings all around, right?

Not quite.

See, as Sam’s story has a happy ending we come to realise that the gran still has huge expectations of Neung… like the fact the she too was expected to marry a ‘nice boy’ that granmama deemed fit for her. That went over like a cinder block in a lake. Neung ran from the wedding!! She was already in her dress, at the venue, on the day and she decided “yeah, this isn’t for me.” So, she ran. Which is how she declared her excommunication. Her Nan was not pleased with this turn of events because it embarrassed the family, made them indebted to the nice boy’s family and all that jazz.

The boy (Chet), who so happens to be Neung’s high school best friend’s baby daddy, had had a crush on Neung since the beginning of time – why he then went and slept with her best friend is still beyond me. Ooooh, and let’s not forget the fact that Neung’s high school bestie – Piengfah – was also in love with her. Honestly, at this point we should just have NA (Neung Anonymous) meetings because she’s starting to seem like an addictive substance.

Now, you may be thinking ‘there is no way in hell this gets crazier!’ You would be WRONG! Not only are the baby daddy and her bestie in love with her, but so is the child of those two! Yes, a cool twenty years (I’m working off of the show, not the books – don’t come for me) after the baby was born, she too falls in love with Neung! And where her mother and father both failed, she succeeds in climbing over Neung's walls and military crawling her way into her heart. And babe, that’s just the beginning because, you see, Daddy Chet and ABSENT MOTHER Piengfah, are absolutely not going to allow their 21-year-old daughter to fall in love with someone sixteen years her senior and they are going to pull all the stops… but that will be in season 2 which is dropping in May, 2024.

Now, let’s talk about how these two stories compare to one another.

Before we continue though, please remember that this is in no way intended to downgrade any one of these shows and, honestly, I loved both iterations of the siblings so we are not going to put anybody down here!

GAP the series, which aired in the second half of 2023, follows the story of Sam and Mon. Sam is depicted as an emotionally stunted individual who is completely uncertain of her own feelings – so much so that her friend circle has to second guess all her decisions in order to figure out what it is she actually wants. Why is she like this? Because of her grandmother, obviously.

Sam’s grandmother, after Song died and Neung ran, put immense amounts of pressure on Sam and essentially stripped her down to “yes, granmama” and “no, granmama”. Being from one of the royal families in Thailand, there are expectations of this family that Neung will no longer live up to and so they have fallen onto Sam.

So, gran did the sensible thing the moment the eldest sister left and doubled down on her control of Sam’s life because she was the only person who knew what would create a fruitful and successful life not just for Sam but for the family image.

How does dear granmama accomplish this? By giving Sam an ultimatum.

When Sam was of age she asked her gran if she could open her own business and she was told that she could have her own business until she was a certain age then she would have to completely give up that dream and get married to the man that was chosen for her.

Sam is business minded and has grown her company into something she is quite proud of. The kicker? Her betrothed is her business partner and keeps sticking his nose in her business – not always in the worst ways but he definitely thinks her knows what is best for here without consulting her.

Enter Mon.

Mon comes into the company as an intern. Her area of focus being social media marketing. She excels at this, gets the company numbers up and is fitting in well. Mon has a secret though… she’s been in love with Sam since their school days but Sam doesn’t remember her. Mon has crafted her entire life around the idea of being “good enough” for Sam and she feels like she’s finally on the right path. Sam starts to notice Mon and they start a secret affair because Sam made a rule that dating in the workplace is prohibited so if anyone catches on that they are fornicating in the office, Sam is going to be forced to fire her girlfriend.

But, of course, things must be better before they get worse so Kirk, grandmama’s lapdog and Sam’s betrothed, finds out about Sam and Mon and immediately runs to tell granny that she needs to get the little miss back under control before she destroys the family image by being publically gay? Look, I don’t know what this idiot thought he was doing but gran finds out.

Cue confrontation!

Sam yells, gran yells, Kirk – for whatever reason – is also yelling. Then Neung appears, as if out of thin air, dragging Mon along to also yell. Now we have a full house! Back and forth, yell yell yell and then Sam decides Mon is more important than all that noise and she starts to make her exit when gran falls back onto the chair behind her gripping her chest and you’ll never guess what was going on there…

If you guessed that she was performing open heart surgery on herself, you would be sorely mistaken. No, she’s apparently having a heart attack! Neung isn’t buying it and Sam decides to believe her sister so her and Mon leave… only for Sam to abandon Mon once gran is admitted to the hospital.

Sam then goes about planning her wedding and Mon plans on flying halfway around the world to avoid her now ex but Sam is struggling and gran is suddenly feeling a little guilty about caging her barely free bird.

All that aside, Mon and Sam end up married and Kirk ends up in a ditch… or at least I wish he did 😒.

Now, onto Neung’s story.

Neung has always felt pressured to be perfect. Her grandmother groomed her to be the perfect lady after all. Not a hair, nor a thread out of place. Neung’s entire life had been planned out like a well written story and all she had to do was jump from page to page quietly and allow all the things that were intended for her to come her way. She goes through the motions set before her like a good little doll and allows her gran to have full control of her life. That is, until her sister comes home one day and tells the family that she has fallen in love.

You'd think this is good news but from the looks on grans face it would probably be closer to the look you'd give someone if their dog urinated on your custom polar bear white fleece rug.

She turned her nose up at the very thought that her granddaughter would be ‘defective’ and immediately told Song to end that useless relationship so she could focus on more realistic things… like marrying the man that dear ol’ gran had already chosen for her. When Song refused, all hell broke loose and gran kicked her out.

So Song left, Neung raged and the grandmother stood on her sanctimoniously high horse thinking she had saved her bloodline from embarrassment or whatever. Then the news came that Song was deceased and still the grandmother refused to take accountability, choosing instead to blame Song’s girlfriend.

This is where I think Neung drew the line. Blaming the person that Song chose to love for her dying was the final straw and she decided she wanted no part of this ruse any longer. She left the family home and decided to live the life of a struggling artist. Her grandmother cut her off so her finances were up in the air most of the time but Sam was always there to be safety net.

Neung had resigned herself to never finding love, never being happy, never having anyone to call her own because she had been taught that no one was worthy of her. No one that her gran didn’t say was worthy, anyway. So she went on living like that… until the sun came out from behind the clouds and we all know what they say about dynamite coming in small packages.

This new force of nature was a pint-sized, 20-year-old beauty with an innocence that could make cherubs sing. She came by Neung’s store one day and asked to have her portrait done – Neung is actually an artist, but she’s ‘struggling’ by choice at this point – and Neung wasn’t going to turn a paying customer away. So they sat, for hours, while Neung got every detail of this girl’s face down on paper. The girl, coincidentally named Aneung, had been planning this meeting for ages and once she had her in she was not planning on being shut out again. And, boy, does this little nugget wear Neung down.

Eventually Neung admits that Aneung has become an integral part of herself and she doesn’t want to extricate herself from Aneung. That’s all well and good, until Neung finds out who Aneung’s mother is.

She is now confronted with her best friend from high school who she told to abort her baby because she felt it would possibly ruin her life to go through with the pregnancy. Piengfah – Aneung’s mother – also admits that she named her baby that, out of spite, as a reminder to herself that the person she loved the most told her to get rid of her baby before it was even born. And now Neung is in a guilt spiral because the person she has come to love might not have been born if her mother had listened to her best friend.

Anyway, not to give too much more of the story away, the gran dies. We should all be very sad about this… Neung is beside herself because she realizes she will never have the opportunity to make up with her gran. Again, guilt spiral!

Maybe if she had listened… maybe if she had married the guy gran chose… or if she spoke to her kindly the last time they were together…

All these possibilities are running through Neung’s mind and then Aneung comes to her, wanting to help her in any way she can. And, for a time, Neung allows this. Neung then wakes up the morning after her grans wake with the bright idea the Aneung is too good for her and she needs to push her away. Which she does, spectacularly. Aneung is besides herself while also trying to reason with her lover but nothing seems to be working so she leaves. And once again, Neung is all on her own…

This show has me wanting to call my gran just let her know how grateful I am that she isn’t a controlling crazy person. All this heartache, this strife, could have been avoided if the gran had loosened up a little sooner.

She raised women who were intellectuals, strong in their own rights, brilliant and business minded and she refused to trust that without the presences of the Y-chromosome in their lives they would be fulfilled and happy.

They all missed out on some of these best years of each other’s lives because of all of them being stubborn to some degree. Only the two sisters remain and in May we will see how Neung and Aneung’s story closes off with season 2.

There are a lot of unresolved feelings, a lot of hurt and a lot of misunderstandings going around but only time will tell if everyone will find their way back to their soulmate.

Stay tuned.

[kevingotabigasschin]

As much as I love Spongebob and it’s main cast, I also like the character that are a part of some of the main’s history, it’s just sad that some of them are forgotten or oneoffs.

Like Squilliam being a long time rival to Squidward, we were never really given a reason why he decided to bully Squidward, him being rich and Squidward being poor isn’t enough of an excuse. 

Maybe it’s because he’s actually genuinely lonely, his friends in the restaurant episode look rich as well so they either are leaching off of him or are actually rich and just accepted him because he’s like them. 

Squidward is the only guy who isn’t a yes man to Squilliam that we know of and points out his flaws and constantly challenges Squilliam’s views in each episode we see them together. 

I found him kind of a fun character even though he was an asshole to Squidward, maybe he is just an asshole that likes to flaunt his riches on poor folk I don’t know maybe I’m looking too far into it.

It’s a shame he hasn’t appeared in the official show for years now, would’ve been nice how he’d interact with other characters like Krabs, Sandy or even Plankton.

On the topic of Squidward, another character connected to him is Squilvia, I honestly loved her and Squidward in that episode. 

It was the only time we get to see him acting bashful towards someone he likes and wants to be around, that doesn’t happen often, it’s kinda cute how he acted when she first walked in the restaurant. 

And they’re like two peas in a pod, I wish they had kept her in the show longer so Squidward doesn’t have to be alone and miserable, if Krabs could get Mrs. Puff then why couldn’t Squidward be happy with Squilvia. 

Also would’ve liked to see a girl’s night out episode with her, Sandy, Karen, Pearl, Mrs. Puff and even Princess Mindy. 

We desperately need more women in the show than just the same people, would also be a perfect opportunity to develop her more.

Speaking of Princess Mindy, why on earth didn’t they bring her back? 

They just brought back Dennis back and he’s from the Spongebob movie too so why not bring her back? 

She was a perfect friend to Patrick and Spongebob, she was clearly the smartest out of both of them put together and genuinely so kind to the point where she was trying to stall her dad to give the boys more time. 

She was also nice enough to give them a boost of confidence with the grass mustaches (even if they were fake) and the wind in a bag (which they ended up losing) 

She could’ve been great friends with Sandy since they both seem to share smarts and a love for knowledge.

So sad she never showed up in the official show. 

On the subject of Patrick, we never talk about his sister before they gave him another from the Patrick Star Show. 

Considering that she’s older than Patrick I’m assuming she lives on her own, so it would explain as to why she isn’t in the Patrick Star Show since he’s still living with his parents due to being young and she’d probably be out of the house by then. 

Even though she is rough with the main cast including her own brother, she does genuinely seem to care when Patrick is upset so she’s not heartless. 

Sure she has anger issues but I think that adds to her character, even though Sam isn’t conveniently attractive I like that, I like that they don’t tone down the wackiness of her behavior just because she’s a girl. 

Although I don’t like the fact that they made her stupid and unable to speak unless through grunting, I would’ve just had her as Patrick’s over protective sister that thinks Spongebob is a bad friend or a bad influence on Patrick. 

Would’ve been funny if she met up with Spongebob’s cousin Blackjack since both of them seem to be similar in character and in strength. 

Getting to Blackjack, he is apparently Spongebob’s cousin that keeps getting in and out of jail and was also a bully to him growing up. 

Spongebob obviously gets upset when Blackjack says he’s coming back and wants Spongebob to come to his parents house or he’s dead. 

It turns out Blackjack wasn’t holding Spongebob’s parents for ransom they were celebrating him getting out of jail. 

I honestly kind of like Blackjack would love how he’d fit in at the Salty spitoon or even up against a guy like Larry.

Knowing that Spongebob has a cousin similar to himself I can only imagine how that cousin felt around Blackjack as well. 

I’d actually like to see a full Spongebob family reunion episode of just his family and his friends showing up and accidentally ruining it while Spongebob’s trying to impress his folks. 

And here is the man in question himself, Stanley S. Squarepants another one of Spongebob’s cousins. 

Dude is known for having a streak of bad luck, having bad things inexplicably happen to him. 

I always liked him as a kid and kinda related to his awkward, shy behavior. 

He’s honestly one of my favorite relatives of Spongebob besides his grandma and Blackjack. 

Dude’s well-meaning and kinda cute, honestly surprised how he didn’t become a tumblr sexyman, he fits all the checkmarks. 

Spongebob tries to get him a job in his debut ep at the Krusty Krab but due to his bad luck makes the restaurant a living hell to work at. 

Dude’s just trying his best to do things right but things go south for him anyway, this poor guy. 

He seems to have an interest in photography, he should try to pursue that instead.

I could only imagine how terrified he’d be of Blackjack growing up, unless his bad luck worked on Blackjack too. 

Dude is my favorite and I want him to come back so bad but I know it’s a slim chance and probably won’t happen.

Also did I mention he almost marries Harold?

[fate-motif]

6 and 13

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

the most annoying to me personally, precisely because i also ship it, are jc fans, especially cis female white american shippers who have never thought in-depth about any kind of racialized dynamics in the relationship and rarely if ever think about chakotay’s individual personal happiness and can’t imagine him as a person outside of being janeway’s lover.

and also the ones who are deeply obsessed with making them raise babies. is that what a relationship is to them? the dream of 2.5 children, a dog and the white picket fence? they’re both over 40 dude just let them hike and watch mad men at home. why do you think janeway’s happiness needs to revolve around having children? maybe have a think about that? can’t they just make each other happy?

13. worst blorboficiation 

“haha geordi/harry is so gay he’s so bad at women” let me stop you right there. i understand that you, a gay person like to see yourself in a character who does not get to have good relationships with female characters. i can’t take that from you. but maybe think twice about why the writers had them be the ones so bad at women, and consider that there’s a world where they actually get to have good relationships with female characters and it’s a good world. it’s a world where men of color get to be acknowledged as worthy of being sexually desired, by the characters that at the time were considered to be the ones that could sexually desire them (that is to say, women).

so maybe don’t be hostile when other people don’t see them as gay and can, in fact, see through the racist writing and imagine them connecting romantically with women. or even people who see their relationships with other men and don't instantly see romantic connection.

[brandonxdylan]

Ranking the GAY EPISODES of Beverly Hills, 90210 - Part 1

Pride month may be coming to a close, but I didn’t want to let it slip by without doing a little something special. I thought it would be fun to do an overview of all of the gay-themed storylines from the series. There were quite a few of them over the years (although not as many as there were seasons of the show, which perhaps is saying something), especially considering for a show that didn’t have any significant queer content on a consistent basis, and certainly no gay regulars to speak of. These episodes run the gamut from throwaway fluff to pretty dark and heavy, and I’m going to rank them in terms of how effectively I think they handle the “gay” element (spoiler alert: not well), as well as how satisfying they are in terms of soapy drama.

I really tried to give these episodes a fair shake, knowing that it would be pointless to judge them for not delivering deeply nuanced takes in an era where we simply were not getting that on prime time network television. I feel like they still mostly fall short, but there’s enough good stuff in here to warrant some genuine consideration.

A couple of caveats before going forward. First of all, some of these episodes deal with some serious themes (AIDS, suicide, gay bashing), so consider yourself trigger warned. Secondly, this post is all in good fun, so lets not take it (or my hot takes) too seriously.

#8.) Crimes and Misdemeanours (Season 8, Episode 19)

Kicking things off, in dead last we have this dud from season 8, which has precisely one, single joke to offer, and still manages to screw it up. Steve runs into a woman at the Peach Pit, and while flirting with her, makes passing reference to Brandon, his “partner.” Obviously, he means business partner, but when she invites Steve and his “boyfriend” Brandon to lunch with she and her “girlfriend,” she clearly means it, and Steve somehow doesn’t think anything of it, and is all to happy to report to Brandon that he snagged them an awesome double date. At lunch, the two “couples” somehow get through the entire meal just beating around the bush, with the women (obviously lesbians by this point) clearly referring to Brandon and Steve as a couple, but these dummies of course don’t pick up on any of this out of sheer dimwittery and, I don’t know, super thick hetero-goggles or something. No, it’s not until Steve and Brandon are invited to the women’s apartment for dinner (which Steve expects to be an orgy, because of course he does) and they’re literally staring at the one bed shared by both women that either of them start to realize what’s really going on. Gay panic ensues, and the whole thing is played for laughs (not that there are any). I’m a sucker for these ridiculous sicomy setups involving misunderstandings and misplaced romantic interest, and this show can occasionally do them well (the luau episode from season 10 is a fabulous example of this, and also has some fun gay content - more on that later), but the problem is none of this is funny or surprising. Neither is it insensitive or exploitative. It’s just kind of stupid. The reveal can be seen coming a mile away, and the whole episode is just buildup to what I’ll generously call the punchline. A better show would’ve done a lot more with this, maybe playing with the concept of Steve seeing heterosexuality as the default, and being blind to other possibilities. Ideally, it also would have had more than one joke.

#7.) Comic Relief/Santa Knows (Season 8, Episodes 13-14)

David takes a job at a car wash, where he notices a bunch of his coworkers making very boring and unimaginative gay jokes about a young male employee named Ben who lives in the garage’s office due to the fact that his dad kicked him out for being gay. David confronts Ben’s parents in the hopes of getting them to see the error of their ways, but the interaction ends with Ben’s dad choosing to declare that “I don’t have a son,” rather than accept Ben for who he is. It’s really harsh, but in dad’s defense, David has very little tact, and it’s really none of his business considering he met Ben five minutes ago. In spite of this, Ben still holds out hope for a reconciliation. While his mom is somewhat more receptive than his dad, she still tells Ben that it’s for the best that he give his dad time to cool down. David once again intervenes, asking Ben’s mom - a woman who is very clearly deeply torn between her love for her son and her need to grant her husband the authority he commands - why she can’t just explain to her husband why taking Ben back in is the right thing to do, as if it’s just that easy. And that’s really the problem with this storyline. It deals with some really dark and emotionally complicated subject matter, and it’s just so glaringly obvious that telling this story from the perspective of a detached outsider is not the best way to approach it. Especially considering it’s David, whose track record for empathy and compassion is fucking zero. Give this to someone like Steve, which would allow him to experience some emotional growth alongside Ben’s parents, or Valerie, who has her own history of familial turmoil (though she does pop up later in this episode and isn’t much more helpful than David, so maybe scratch that one). All of this proves to be too much for Ben to take, and David discovers that he plans to slit his wrists. This is where Val gets involved, as she and David basically just berate Ben into not hurting himself, with Val insisting that she understands Ben’s particular struggles more than she actually does or possibly could. They both give him the “tough love” treatment which, hey, is maybe not what this kid whose parents openly hate him actually needs. Still, it all ends up somewhat happily because of course all Ben and his parents really needed was for someone from the gang to show up out of nowhere and yell at them a bit in order to figure their shit out. This is a story worth telling, but coming at it from the perspective of someone who has nothing to do with it doesn’t allow for much depth. And it really doesn’t satisfy as a soapy plot line either. Even that would require more of an investment from the viewer, and we simply don’t have time or reason to suddenly be all in on this character who comes out of nowhere for two episodes and then disappears forever. Ultimately, this story is just too bleak and depressing to be much fun, and too shallow to be emotionally satisfying.

#6.) Summer Storm (Season 2, Episode 3)

This isn’t ranked low because it’s a bad episode. On the contrary, it’s actually a pretty good episode from one of the show’s best seasons, and builds on one of the show’s most iconic storylines - namely, Brenda and Dylan. However, that doesn’t really concern us here. What does concern us is the B story, about how Kelly meets a cute volleyball player named Kyle. They flirt a bit and eventually go on a date, but when Kelly starts putting the moves on Kyle, he suggests they cool it. Spoiler alert, it’s because he (sort of) comes out as gay later in the episode. But even if he didn’t, Kelly’s reaction to this is really weird. She takes it oddly personally that he doesn’t want to get naked with her on the first date, and gives him the cold shoulder the next day. I haven’t watched these early seasons in several years now but I guess Kelly’s always been a pouty drama queen. Anyway, Kyle does eventually confide in Kelly, telling her that he’s tried to be into girls, and that he genuinely likes her, but that he knows they can’t be more than friends. It’s kind of cute, and Kyle’s conundrum is a pretty common one. Though it’s definitely possible to assume he doesn’t come out as fully gay because the show didn’t want to go too far, it’s also kind of nice to get a portrayal of a character in the process of figuring out his sexuality, without any clear resolution. That is how it works in real life sometimes after all. But considering this is such a minor storyline and the queer content is pretty tepid, it’s hard to rank this any higher than I have it.

#5.) Baby, You Can Drive My Car/Family Tree (Season 10, Episodes 8-9)

Dylan meets with a guy named Andrew, who is one of the directors of a local community centre for kids, in order to discuss making a hefty donation. Andrew makes passing reference to an ex-boyfriend, which prompts a discussion about how Andrew has to remain closeted among co-workers out of fear of losing his job. He knows that there are some bigots out there who would have some not-so-great feelings about a gay man working with their kids (that old chestnut), and his co-director is apparently one of them. Dylan tries to reason that “hey, it’s the 90s,” and that Andrew shouldn’t have to be closeted for those reasons. Andrew, of course, knows better, and while he agrees that no, he shouldn’t have to, the fact remains that he does. To demonstrate that at least he accepts Andrew for who he is, Dylan puts his arm around him in a playful (yet platonic way). Unfortunately, this happens in a dark parking lot and within the presence of a group of homophobes whom proceed to attack Dylan and Andrew with a baseball bat. While Dylan manages to wrestle the bat away from one of the guys (sure) and escapes with just a few bumps and bruises, Andrew doesn’t get off quite as easy. Dylan’s eager to spill details to the cops, but Andrew refuses, on the grounds that he not only doesn’t want to drag this whole unpleasant incident out any further, but he also doesn’t want to draw any more attention that might put him (and his job) at further risk. Andrew’s fears prove to be perfectly justified when, through circumstance, his co-director, Patsy, finds out anyway, and suggests Andrew take a (permanent) leave of absence. As is always the case with this show when there’s a Gay in trouble, a member of the gang makes it their problem to solve, and so Dylan confronts Patsy about Andrew being let go. Although Andrew specifically tells Dylan that he doesn’t want his help, fearing that pushing his luck with Patsy is just going to make things more public and humiliating, Dylan says that he can’t justify donating to a bigoted organization, and he threatens to pull his funding if Patsy doesn’t agree to hire Andrew back. She reluctantly relents, allowing Andrew to return to work, but she pulls her son from Andrew’s basketball team, and soon enough, more kids start to drop out for the same reasons. As things escalate, Andrew decides that if his presence is going to detract from the mission of the centre - to provide care and support for kids - then he should quit. However, Dylan swoops in with one more ace up his sleeve. He talks to Patsy’s son directly, and gets him to question whether he really is uncomfortable with Andrew, or if it’s just his mother’s influence that’s making him think that way. This works, and all of the kids who had previously dropped out assure Andrew that they not only want him there, but they need him there. All in all, this is a decent storyline, but it does engage with a few tropes that rub me the wrong way. First of all, it’s never not at least a little annoying to watch straight characters sanctimoniously decide that doing their version of “the right thing” is more important than respecting the wishes of the gay characters whose safety and livelihood is what’s actually at risk, and this storyline is a pretty egregious example of that. It also follows the usual 90210 pattern of having characters just badger others relentlessly until they conveniently get their way. Granted, this case gets a bit of a pass in that regard, because the tirade that Dylan fires at Patsy is kind of satisfying, and Luke Perry is a good enough actor to make it feel properly motivated and believable. We do love an ally king.

Watch for Part 2!

[futbol16]

Stay Down  • Alexia Putellas

Request: “To ‘Im okay amor’ OMG PLEASE WE NEED A SECOND PART OF Y/N RECOVERY AND MAYBE WEEKS LATER ANMATCH AGAINST THE TEAM AND R IS ACTUALLY SCARED AND PANICKING ON GETTING ON THE PITCH AND ALEXIA AND THE WHOLE TEAM NOTICES”

Part 1 I’m Okay Amor

Word count: 1,5k

Upon arriving at the training ground the next day you were immediately called into Jonatan’s office and the two of you, with a few teammates eavesdropping, discussed how to take legal actions regarding the attack. For the next week and a half you’re told to take practice easy to let your ribs and body recover, but you insisted on playing as soon as possible. 

Now you were reconsidering that decision because lining up next to you in the tunnel was the team you didn’t want to see ever again, RCD Espanyol. You feel their eyes on you, their gazes burning holes into your body and you gulp. You know you won’t be able to take it much longer and a few seconds later you turn your head towards them, eyes skimming over the group. A few of them give you dirty looks, others smirking and there’s one girl who blows you a kiss. 

You remember her. The disgusted look that crosses your expression doesn’t seem to sit right with the girl because she attempts to move towards you except she’s blocked by another body, Patri standing in front of her with her arms crossed over her chest and giving her a daring look. Thankfully, the Espanyol player backs down.

The Barca girls eye you for a second. They’ve never seen you be so nervous, you were very confrontational and to see you barely be able to hold eye contact with these girls worried your friends even further. As you walk to your position Alexia gives your shoulder a squeeze and you slightly relax knowing that if anything were to happen, she’d be there. 

Although your team is doing fantastic and you’re bringing your normal self to the game, making passes, assisting and showing off your skills, the opposing team isn’t giving up either. However, their focus seems to be more on you than the fact that they’re currently losing the first half of the match. Throughout the first 45 minutes of the game, you had been tackled more times than you could count on two hands, but you weren’t angry, it could have been worse. 

The Barcelona girls though? A totally different story. Patri is seething in place, Irene and Ana-Maria in similar spirits. Mapi is raging and practically has to be held back by Ingrid, her girlfriend less than happy about the situation. Then there’s Alexia and Pina, both girls looking like they’re on the verge of crying from frustration. You could almost laugh at Aitana’s expression, the girl was done with the referee being blind to the tackles.

When the half time whistle is blown you walk off the field with a slight limp and you don’t look up in time as you’re harshly shoulder checked by one of the blue and white striped players. Alexia is by your side instantaneously and she subtly pushes the player out of her way, willing herself to not lash out. Instead, she pulls you into her side and helps you off the pitch.

As you reach the locker room you’re quick to fill your water bottle and drink it in one go and you turn to fill it again but a hand on your wrist stops you. Following the arm the wrist belongs to you find Aitana staring back at you, the rest of your team stopping everything they're doing and also looking at you. You feel your lungs get heavy and you clutch your side as you lean over your knees, now breathing heavily. 

The team watches in panic until Alexia jumps to your side quickly followed by Irene as both women lower you to the ground and into the midfielder’s embrace. You lean back into Alexia’s chest as her arms circle around your waist and she mutters comforting words into your ear, Irene running cold water over her hands before placing her palms on your face to cool your flushed face. You breathe out in relief, eyes closing for a second. Your teammates share a look of shock and concern. They have never seen you get so worked up because of a match, or basically anything before.

“I’m not letting them do this to her!” Mapi throws her hands up in anger and this time Ingrid doesn’t stop her, the scowl on her own face hard as well.

“My offer still stands, I know people.” Patri looks towards you questioningly and you smile at her slightly. Alexia smooths your hair back and out of your eyes and her heart flutters when you lean into her touch. She was trying to focus on you and you only, she didn't need the both of you panicking. It was her turn to hopefully bring you some comfort.

“No, no girls. I appreciate it but the authorities are taking care of it.”

“Bullshit!” the team looks at the source of the voice, utterly surprised when they realize it’s Claudia who spoke the words.

“She’s right! How long are we gonna wait?!” Ana exclaims and Patri can only nod at her.

“Chicas! For now let’s focus on the match! Y/N you sure you’re good to play?” Irene turns to you and you swallow, nodding and standing up. Alexia stands with you, her hand resting on the small of your back as she observes you worriedly.

“Yeah, yeah.” you tuck your shirt into your shorts, nervously reaching for the water and gulping down a few more sips. 

“So what’s the plan?”

“We absolutely demolish them!”

And you do. There’s 15 more minutes on the clock but your team is leading 9-0, two goals and three assists coming from you. Nevertheless, bruises are already littering your legs and at this point even Jonatan is asking you if you’d like to be subbed off but you shake your head at him. You weren’t going to back down now. 

Just as you’d put another ball to the back of the net, studs connect with your shin and you fall to the ground with a painful yelp as you clutch your leg.

Looking up at the shadow looming over you, your eyes connect with the player, the one who sent you a kiss and she’s smirking down at you, her hands on her hips. You attempt to get up, only for her to push your shoulder back.

“Stay down!” she commands before mumbling. “Weakling.”

The word triggers something and you're up on your feet in an instant and pushing her away from yourself. She stands her ground too though and shoves you back, a shove that has you putting pressure on your bad leg and you take a step back. Just as she goes to shove you again a flash of blue and red appears and bodies the Espanyol player. Mapi is the one who stands over her now, jaws clenched.

“Stay down” she utters the same words and the referee is already holding up a yellow card that’s thrusted in all three of your faces. You roll your eyes at him, though the prideful feeling in your chest intensifies as your teammates check up on you and show their care. 

You decide then that just for the fun of it, you were going to get that tenth goal. Alexia knows what you’re thinking, of course she does. Many often say it’s like your minds are connected with how well the two of you work on the pitch, sensing the other's presence without having to look up. It was similar to the nature of your relationship too. 

The two of you dance around the blue and white players and you don’t waste a second when Alexia sends a cross, you immediately volley the ball behind the keeper who doesn’t have time to react.

You’re lifted into the air by the midfielder and soon joined by the rest of the team, the final whistle blowing seconds later. 

“There’s our Mrs. Putellas!” Patri shouts, quickly followed by Pina who’s jumping up and down.

“Mrs.Putellas, huh?” Alexia teases as she notices the light flush of your cheeks. She was glad you could finally catch your breath after such a match.

“Sounds nice” you avoid eye contact, but your girlfriend only chuckles as she pulls you into her.

“It does” your arms make their way around her waist as she leans down. “Next time I see that girl, I’m breaking her legs. I already had enough when she was making that kissy face and then she pulled this shit.”

You laugh lightly at the frustrated voice in which she says all of it and she glances down at you once she’s sure no Espanyol players were around.

“I don’t think you know how to do that, but I appreciate it.” you joke before your eyes wander over your friends dancing around. “I suggest sending Mapi to do it”

The laughter that bursts out of your girlfriend is one that you can only grin at, your arms tightening their hold on her. You were in safe hands here with your girlfriend and teammates, you knew for a fact that no RCD Espanyol player would ever touch you again, they wouldn’t live through it.

[greatygreatgreat]

I may or may not have hyperfixated on the plot summary for the Valentine’s Day episode *pulls up research* (I apologize for how long this is going to be, I’m an Aquarius and I love conspiracy theories/theories in general)

So first off, we have the official press release from ABC:

“Valentine’s Day” – On Valentine’s Day, the Abbott teachers discuss their relationships and plans for the holiday. Janine finds out one of her students has a crush on her and when turning to a colleague for advice, she inadvertently learns a secret about another teacher. Elsewhere, Ava sits in on Jacob’s Black History class after receiving a complaint

The most notable parts I took from this were “turning to a colleague for advice” and “about another teacher” since they never mention names. Could this be a red herring? Maybe. 

Plotline A and plotline B normally don’t have that much overlap character wise, besides the cold open or the stinger, since they are usually happening at the same time during the school day. This means we can cross out Ava and Jacob as the person Janine turns to for advice (Jacob would so spill the beans to someone though). This leaves Barbara, Melissa, Gregory, and Mr. Johnson. 

As far as the big secret (Gregory’s crush) goes, Mr. Johnson is the only character who could be involved in plot A who has made direct note of this. Barbara has noticed something budding but hasn’t said anything and Melissa would not get involved. Lisa notes that “[Melissa is] very committed to ‘mind your own business.’ It's not your business, so stay out of it.” which implies she is staying out of it. The press release mentions “another teacher” so Gregory would theoretically not out his own crush. Although we haven’t seen Mr. Johnson as involved with Janine compared to the others, it would not be surprising if he jumped in to help (potential reference to the Olympic village and his many past lives in addition to the fact he was bumped up to series regular this season). 

Side note: Tyler mentioned that he wants Janine and Gregory to have a “unique spin” on the will they won’t they. Sitcoms (and long running tv shows in general) normally have their main couple established in season 2 so it could allude to deviating from that or something else. 

Another theory going around is a secret about Melissa whether that be something with her ex, her current boyfriend, or the possibility of her being queer. Lisa has confirmed that "Yes. You will see [Gary] as well [as Kristen Marie]. And it's great” (EW interview). It would make sense for Gary to make a return whether it be as her date since they mention the teachers talking about their plans or he could return with a lack of V-day plans (his initial date offer to her was Dave & Busters so who knows what he’s like). Lisa has said that:

“there were a couple of interesting romantic moves that happen before the end of the season. I’m not going to say what, but I think the audience is going to be really happy. Also, they’re just gonna be enthusiastic. Last year, when people were saying, ‘What do you want to see happen?’ and I gave a scenario…that’s gonna happen and I can’t tell you what it is, but it’s coming up and I loved the episode. It was a big episode. I think it might be my favorite episode this season […] but I think this one that I’m talking about was probably planned. It was kind of a no brainer. If you tell me three scenarios, I’ll tell you if it’s one of those.”

From what I have seen in various articles, she doesn’t talk too much on other characters and their relationships (i.e. Janine and Gregory) so whether it is in this episode or later episodes, something presumably good is going to happen to Melissa. I don’t have a link to an interview but I believe I saw that she mentioned Joe and Gary will both come up this season. A lot of people have mentioned some of her lines that are really queer coded with the most recent being the “decisive women are hot” line. Lisa loves interacting with fans and has been known to repost work wives content as well as just generally supporting the LGBTQ+ community and their love of her characters which plays into her enthusiasm in the interview. This could start a major plot line for her if Janine were to catch on and bring back her sister since she mentioned Kristen Marie would be coming back this season (EW interview was post Principal’s Office episode for reference).   

The last teacher who could theoretically have a secret would be Barbara. In the fundraising episode, we see her go back and forth with the church ladies about church-like behavior. We haven’t had a multi-episode plot line with Barbara and even though there “isn’t a weird thing about her” we saw her crack at the end of season 1 when she contemplates retiring so we could see a moment of weakness from her this season. We also haven’t seen her husband or daughter in a while so it would be interesting to see either of the two reintroduced since they have connections to Abbott. Although we haven’t seen too many of her weaknesses, she isn’t the type to be direct with the cameras so this could add to the inadvertently part of Janine learning someone’s secret through someone else. 

Apologies for all the word vomit and thank you for reading my silly little 2am thoughts!! If y’all have any other interviews or theories, I’d love to hear them.

[blackbutler-readerinsertsandjunk]

the circus girls (beast, doll *she/they*, and wendy) having a female s/o likewise the boys having a male s/o

fun fact (if anyone couldn't tell) I am hilariously bisexual (and I have a card in my wallet to Prove It)

so let's just say. this appeals to my demographic XD

It’s… different? ‘Different’ is definitely the word to describe it, for her. She’s always admired other women in this quiet, envious way, but only after meeting (Name) did she realize that there’s a part of her which is actually attracted to other women. At least, she’s attracted to (Name). She’s a little awkward in bringing her feelings to life, such as kissing and holding hands… then again, she’s like that with anyone she’s attracted to. It might make things difficult for her S/O simply because Beast’s insecurity around how the rest of the world sees her makes her nervous to do anything too romantic around other people. Within the circus, though, she’s a lot less shy about it. (… Joker has almost ‘trained’ her out of it by accidentally-on-purpose bumping into her when he can tell she’s hesitating about kissing her partner! Supportive git.)

This… it’s… is this okay?! He’s just allowed to be all touchy-feely with another man?? It’s not something he’s ever actually seen for himself, two men walking around holding hands or kissing, so he doesn’t know if there’s some… rule… about not doing it. Or something. He’s always kind of known that he’s attracted to men and women; it just feels like he’s doing something odd by acting on the attraction to men. At least (Name) is sweet and patient with him. Dagger has the same insecurity that Beast does, in how the world perceives him. Being romantic with a man feels like one more thing that marks him as some ‘other’, one more thing about him that’s different from other people. God, though… does he love being close to (Name). As long as he’s at the fairgrounds, he’s always kissing or affectionately leaning against the other man. He’s happy to be in love, happy to be in love with (Name), and that’s all there is to it.

Wow, this is… ah… someone like (Name) really wants to be with her? Freckles has never actually met someone who’s like her, someone who fades between being female and being ‘neither’ the way she does. It makes her wonder how (Name) exists, how it makes her feel and how she deals with it. Freckles sort of digs in with a million questions that, very clearly, reflect the things that she goes through. “Oi, so, do y’ ‘ave days where y’ jus’… love y’r body so much, ‘n’ then days where y’ can’t stand the lady bits ‘n’ want ‘em cut off ‘r somethin’?” “Wot do y’ do when y’re ‘avin’ a day where y’ want people t’ call y’ ‘they’ but they keep callin’ y’ a girl?” And, well, so on. If nothing else, she’s not shy about showing how much she loves her partner. Not as much as some of the others, anyway. She’ll happily parade around anywhere holding hands with (Name), maybe even kissing on the cheek, and most people will see two young women being close friends. It’s definitely the cause of a lot of giggles in private as the both of them undo each other’s corsets.

Aye, well, what’s he supposed to do around another fine gent, just ignore him? Like Dagger, he’s known for a while that he’s attracted to both men and women, so it’s not as if this is a surprise to him that he fell for (Name). He’s not particularly insecure about this side of him, nor is he shy about showing it — the other man is treated to all manner of touching, kissing, nuzzling, and the charming one-liners most have come to expect from Joker. He’s a little more wary of it when it comes to being out among the rest of society… Joker doesn’t want (Name) specifically to be the target of any mockery or cruelty for being ‘too’ close with another man. Him? He can take it; he’s been through enough. It’s not something he wants to put his partner through, though. He’ll be sure to more than make up for it while in the safety of the fairground and when they’re alone together.

It ain’t… nothin’ like what he’s used to, and he’s a little timid about admitting that. He feels like he isn’t well versed in things like romance anyway. There haven’t been too many real relationships in his life, and the few he’s had were with women. Even if they didn’t last long, it’s what’s… normal. Men go with women, right? He knows he likes women. It just didn’t occur to him until he decided to go with (Name) that the possibility of also liking men existed. Jumbo’s very shy around the other man, often letting him make the first moves or speak more, but then again, that’s pretty much his default state in any romantic relationship. He’s quiet and sedate, rarely leaning down for a kiss unless he’s prompted or until he gets very comfortable. It’s not out of a lack of affection… he’s just insecure in himself. (Name) is alright with that or he wouldn’t be with Jumbo, would he? However, Jumbo does have a tendency to put his arm around the other man’s shoulders, especially in the company of others. He wants to protect the people he loves, so that’s the most telling gesture he can give.

Listen, just… just so long as (Name) don’t start treatin’ him like he ain’t a real man or somethin’! Overcompensating and insecure as always, it’s maybe at its peak when Peter’s in a relationship with another man. He’s so wound up about how other people look at him, and how he looks at himself, he’s afraid that his partner being another man will color the way (Name) looks at him. Peter compares himself so much. To him, his partner is the ‘perfect man’. The way he looks at (Name) is full of admiration and envy, and Peter’s worried. Is he enough of a man? Is he enough in general? He doesn’t look a thing like (Name), so does that mean his partner thinks of him as a weak excuse for a man? Unfortunately, he frequently misses the fact that (Name) likely doesn’t do as much comparing of them as Peter does. He just… wants to be thought of as a real man, a grown adult, and he wants to be enough for someone. He might be a bit defensive in certain situations (what else is new?), and sometimes has bitter, self-deprecating, angry remarks seemingly at the ready. Any kisses around others will be brief and border on dispassionate; in private, though? As always, Peter is eager to prove he’s as much a man as his S/O can handle.

(Oh, well, you could certainly do worse, Snake.) Yes, he supposes so, Goethe. Still… (Wot’s ‘still’ ‘bout it? Bloke likes y’. I say take it.) At the very least, Wilde has a point, doesn’t he? Snake is so prone to shying away from other people simply because he thinks he’ll be mocked or pushed away regardless. However, it becomes more and more apparent that (Name) isn’t the type to do that. This is new territory for Snake, because it’s his first romantic relationship ever. He never had childhood crushes, because he didn’t have a real childhood. Now that he’s an adult, his shrinking violet tendencies mean he doesn’t approach people that way. (Name) wanting to be with him, to hold his hand and kiss him and… it makes his head spin. To him it doesn’t matter that the other man is… well, a man. It just matters that he cares about Snake and doesn’t hold any fear or hate toward Snake’s pets. Although he’ll blush heavily about being kissed in public, or having (Name) hold his hand whilst they walk… ah… it’s really not so bad.

It’s so strange, it’s just… if (Name) is attracted to women, why choose her instead of some other woman? Surely the world is full of women who like other women, even if they must keep it a little secretive. Wendy is a bit baffled by why her partner has chosen her, when she could have picked from any other woman in the world. She’s sort of caught between having a problem like Beast’s and Peter’s — she didn’t realize until she met (Name) that she also liked women as well as men, and she also compares herself to her S/O far too much, silently fussing about whether or not (Name) views her as a ‘real woman’. The biggest difference to Beast is that Wendy is more comfortable in her attraction, less awkward… and the biggest difference to Peter is that Wendy tries very hard not to let her insecurities affect the way she behaves with (Name). She’s more apt to talk about her feelings in private instead of hiding them, and she’s more visibly affectionate with her partner around other people. She likes to act timid and demure like a ‘proper’ lady, but, well… one look at her and (Name) kissing each other every couple of minutes in public or Wendy’s fingers twining around (Name)’s proves that isn’t exactly the case.