#maybe that's obvious by anxious nerd of it all

[softquietsteadylove]

@theshipper47 had this lovely idea and I had to ask you!

tyrant king/Ice Queen AU or secretary AU:

Gil is in prison and Thena needs to get him out 👀

Gil sits down heavily into the seat, hunching himself to lean against the counter as the guards watch them all. He picks up the phone receiver, "hey."

"Hey, Baby."

Gil smiles. Thena has never been one to go crazy with petnames or cutesy couple behaviour. But since he was apprehended by the Korean authorities on their way back to London, she hasn't missed an opportunity to make it clear that she's his partner. "They set a bail number, yet?"

Thena keeps the smile on her face. They're both sure that the guards know at least some of what they're saying in English, so they haven't taken any chances. "Not yet, Yeobo. I keep asking them, though."

What she means is they still don't have any evidence to convict him on anything serious, they just don't want him to slip out of their fingers again.

Gil sighs. He's tried telling her to go home without him--maybe try to make some progress from the English side of things. Even having him expedited from imprisonment in Korea to the UK would be an improvement. They're a little easier to bribe, he thinks.

"Hey," Thena gives him a softer smile this time, tilting her head in the way he thinks is really cute. She presses her hand to the reinforced glass between them, "I miss you."

He presses his hand as close to hers on the glass as possible. "Fuck I miss you, Naekkeo. Sleeping here fucking sucks."

She purses her lips, "I'm sure it's miserable. And just to be clear, sleeping at the airport hotel without you isn't what I'd call enjoyable."

He chuckles. That's more like his Thena--who would normally have a little bit of a tough time expressing how much she misses him, especially around other people. "I'll be with you soon, Gongjunim. If-"

"When," she corrects him freely, and has been doing so everyday when she's allowed to come and see him like this. She raises her brows, "they find out who is framing you for all this."

Gil grins at her. Thena worked for him long enough--she knows who to call, who to trust and who not to. She knows how to fake documents and which ones need to be legit. Hell, she worked for him so long he's still surprised she wasn't brought up in the 'embezzling' charges they had gotten him on.

But that just means that whoever blew the whistle on him was on a personal vendetta, not really out to destroy his 'shipping' business.

Apparently whoever it was didn't know - and still doesn't - what a force of nature his Thena is.

"My poor husband," Thena sighs both loudly and sweetly, putting an extra sweet note into her voice. She flutters her lashes and lets her hair slide off her shoulders, revealing just a little bit of cleavage under her cardigan. "Stuck in this awful place."

Gil raises an eyebrow, leaning closer in a somewhat vane attempt to block the guards' view of her. "Uh, baby?"

But she gives him another smile and taps the glass. It's morse code.

I'm going to pay one of them to give you something for me.

The little minx--his clever snowfox, more like. He snorts, forgoing the coded message and simply drawing a big heart on his side of the glass with his finger. "I know, it's awful. Wait for me?"

She tilts her head at him, "I won't be waiting long, since you'll be with me in no time."

He smiles. She hasn't wavered in that belief even once while visiting him. Even when he's attempted to bring up the flat back home, or his office he still owns here, or any of the other domestic stuff. She won't let him even imply that he won't be back by her side as soon as his trial happens. "Okay, fine, you won't be waiting long. But still...?"

Thena gives him a look he recognises from their earlier days of knowing each other. There's a lot happening behind those eyes of hers. But she would look at him like this sometimes when she was contemplating asking about his business meetings, or that time she had his favourite sundubu delivered to the office when he was sick.

Eventually, her debate with herself ends. It's not denial driving her, rather the drive and belief in whatever she's planning that will get him out of here. She'll do whatever she has to--he believes it too, looking at her.

Thena draws a much smaller, but just as earnest heart on her side of the glass. "I would wait for you until the world burned down around me."

Gil grins, bringing up his hand again to let their fingers press against the glass, as if he could touch the tip of his pointer to hers. It'll have to do. "I promise it won't be that long."

Thena slips her hand away and draws her facade over herself again, clearing her throat and shrugging away any real emotion she had let bleed through. "Indeed--I'm going to go have a meeting with some old associates of yours. I believe they'll hear me out. We had a lovely chat over some tea last we spoke."

Ah, yes, the juniors he had met with whose faces Thena had smashed with a tea tray. They probably would hear Thena out, even if it was just because enemies of Gil's were also enemies of theirs.

"Tell 'em to be on their best behaviour," Gil chuckles. He snarls at the guard waving at him to wrap it up. He sighs, "I gotta go, Princess."

"It's okay," Thena whispers back, her eyes already glassy at having to watch him get led away in handcuffs again. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"I love you, Naekkeo."

"I love you too," she promises, watching as he sets the receiver down, as does she. They hold each other's eyes until he's physically pulled from his seat to be marched back to his cell.

Thena undoes an extra button on her cardigan and stands, making a weepy show of picking up her designer purse.

"Ma'am, if you'll follow me."

Ah, so sweet and innocent seeming. She smiles at the guard--young, probably looking to rise in the ranks. And if he can't do that, then maybe he'll take a payoff from a rich inmate's wife. "Oh, how sweet of you."

She bats her eyelashes at the guard, making light conversation until she's almost out of the building. She looks at the young man without the crocodile tears in her eyes, "here."

He blinks as she slips an old nokia phone and pair of wired earbuds into his hand.

"You give that to him for me and this," she enunciates, slipping a thick stack of won into his pocket, "will be doubled by tomorrow. Can you do that for me?"

The young man gulps, but he doesn't hesitate to accept it, "yes, ma'am."

"Good boy," Thena purrs, watching the poor boy blush as she leaves the same way she came, surrendering her bag to be checked again. Not that anything will be amiss (the money was in the lining of the fake purse and the phone was nestled into her bra). "I'm sure my husband will remember your kindness when all this nasty business is over."

[noxtivagus]

FIRST DAY BACK TO SCHOOL GODDAMN I'M SO MOTIVATED NOW <3

[lovebugism]

“I’m not the easiest person to talk to, or be around. It’s… hard for other people to love me. I get that.” with Eddie? Maybe he and reader are sorta rivals or frenemies?

here's an unsolicited part 2 to this fic! hope you like it :D — eddie knows you like him now, so you find it extremely hard to be normal around him accordingly (enemies to lovers, grumpy!reader, more succession references, 2.3k)

You walk into the Hideout behind Steve and Robin, hands trembling and sticky with sweat. 

The humid air of the overcrowded bar and the overwhelming stench of cheap beer do little to quell your swirling stomach. The too-loud music and bustling bodies are hardly more than a harsh reminder of the last time you were here — pouring your heart out to Eddie Munson in the form of anxious word vomit, only to be hopelessly turned away. 

Not quite rejected but hardly embraced, which is somehow more embarrassing. 

“You alright?” Steve asks once you’ve ducked into the dim hallway of the backstage area. 

The music and muddled chatter are mostly stifled now, but the walls continue to pulse with life — riddled with chipping paint and dubious stains that only add to your unease. You try to swallow down your distant ennui, hoping it isn’t as obvious as it feels. (It is). Your loud feelings are too big for your body, and it’s got your face softly screwed together like you’ve tasted something sour.

The concerned glint in Steve’s eyes makes you cower. “Yeah. I’m peachy,” you deadpan with an unconvincing shrug. “Why?”

“‘Cause you look like we’re leading you to slaughter,” Robin scoffs.

“You’re asking me to be nice to Eddie Munson for two hours,” you grouse. “So, excuse me if I’m not the most chipper.”

The brunette girl flashes you a look over her shoulder, ocean eyes smudged with dark liner. “Scared you’ll spontaneously combust?” she jokes with her hand wrapped around the rusted knob of the faux greenroom. It feels more like her chipped maroon nails have grabbed your heart and twisted.

“Terrified,” you monotone just before she swings the door open.

The tiny, windowless room smells like sweat and grocery store cologne. It’s crowded with vanity mirrors, plastic folding chairs, and suitcases — hardly big enough for a heavy metal band. 

The three of you run into Gareth and Jeff on your way in. The two look nothing like themselves as you shuffle past them in the doorway, sharing fleeting glances and awkward greetings as you go. A couple of D&D nerds in leather and eyeliner feels almost uncanny.

It’s the same with Eddie, sort of. Curls drenched with sweat, eyes smudged black, tanktop damp around the neckline — a total rockstar. You’re not sure if it’s the raucous outfit stirring your stomach or the body wearing it.

“Oh, shit— You assholes actually showed!” Eddie beams at the sight of you. “And you dressed for the occasion, too.”

The boy in all black and silver stands before the three of you, still dressed in corporate attire after working late shifts. Steve and Robin look at least mostly normal without the Family Video vests and branded name tags. You, however, look like one of those businesswear catalogs brought to life — glaringly out of place. 

“You sayin’ The Gap isn’t proper Hideout attire, Munson?” Steve quips, holding his arm out for a friendly (only slightly awkward) side embrace.

Eddie slaps the back of the boy’s collared shirt with a ringed hand. “Claire’s is more metal than The Gap,” he teases, then turns to hug Robin. “At least Buckley looks halfway normal.”

“And by normal, you mean hot, right?” she jokes, voice deep and gritty and effortlessly sultry.

He scoffs. “Obviously.”

Eddie has no trouble greeting Steve and Robin but loses most of his cool when he turns to you.

The not-so confession at Benny’s Burgers seemed to change more things between you than the heart-felt one you shared here not too long ago. He feels a bit weird, knowing now that you meant what you said — that you actuallyliked him, and that it wasn’t just some cruel joke. 

He feels like he’s got cool points to win with you now. And it makes him achingly aware of when he inevitably loses them.

“Look at you,” Eddie grins, tossing his chin back to shake wild curls from his face. A few chestnut strands cling stubbornly to his sticky forehead. The milky white tendons of his neck shine with sweat, too. “You look like an actual human person.”

“Wow. Thanks, Eds,” you monotone, unsure of whether or not to take his words as a compliment. You cross your arms over the chest of your fitted turtle neck and joke, “I’d say that same, but… you look like a poodle that just washed up on shore.”

Robin mumbles your name through gritted teeth, flashing you a look and poking you on the shoulder. She scolds you like a parent, as though to say be nice without actually saying the words out loud.

“What?” you shrug.

Eddie only chuckles — a low and honeyed sound he presses to your ear when he brings you suddenly in for a hug. His lean body meets yours, soft and strong and slightly clammy. His skin smells like deep cologne, minty aftershave, and very faintly of boy. You tense when his hands cradle your back.

“Oh,” you mumble in surprise, floundering at the affection as you attempt to hold him back. “Okay.”

“How’s the nine-to-five?” Eddie asks after he parts from you, sounding almost like he cares. “Boring the absolute shit outta you?”

You shrug with an air of nonchalance and hope you don’t look as flustered by his attention as you feel. “Oh, you know… Burying the bodies, counting the cash.”

“Gotta picture of me in your little cubicle?”

“Tons,” you answer. “It’s basically an Eddie Munson shrine.”

His smile widens to show all his teeth. His chocolate eyes glitter with mischief, too, like he knows what he’s doing to you. 

Eddie gives you a break from his suffocating stare and looks to Steve and Robin standing on his other side. You feel like you can finally breathe. “I told Greg at the bar to give my friends free beer tonight— just show him your ID or whatever,” the boy tells them.

“Oh, my god— I could kiss you right now,” Robin mumbles.

Eddie’s plush pink lips curl into a half-smirk when he turns to you again. “So try not to run up your tab tonight, alright, sweetheart?” he quips and pats you on the arm. It’s easier to joke that he hadn’t mentioned you at all when your name was first from his lips. Which is totally a joke you would’ve made.

You flash Steve and Robin a wide-eyed look of annoyance, jaw clenched to contain all the insults you instinctively want to spew. “He got us free beers,” the former cautions with a sympathetic shrug. “Don’t ruin it.”

You roll your eyes and hear them leave behind you — not even trying to pretend like they didn’t swing byfor the beers. Eddie’s stupid grin widens when you stay. “You heard the man. Means you gotta be nice to be all night.”

“Right,” you scoff like it’s funny. Steve The Hair Harrington doesn’t exactly scream figure of authority to you. Robin Buckley, maybe. But definitely not Steve.

“Think you can do it without spontaneously combusting?” he quips.

You hate that he knows you so well. “Not particularly,” you deadpan.

Eddie tilts his wild head to the side and sends you a pretty, tight-lipped smile. “Well, you’re doing a great job already.”

His praise is sarcastic. You know this already, so you’re not sure why it has your stomach doing backflips. “Thanks…” you mumble, inherently shrinking inside yourself as you attempt to make small talk. “How, uh— How was the show?”

“Fine,” the boy hums, shrugging his pale shoulders. “Same set from last time. Same crowd of drunks.”

“Sorry I missed it.”

“Eh. Don’t be. You’ve actually got important shit going on— Don’t worry about me.”

“Your shit’s important, too,” you argue without thinking, perhaps more shocked by your sincerity than the boy ahead of you. You follow quickly and much more harshly, “I guess.”

Eddie smiles wordlessly. You start to squirm in place. He watches you grow suddenly uncomfortable in your own skin as you seem to look everywhere but back at him. The pink expression ebbs into a more concerned one. “You okay?”

You hate the question more the second time. 

“Fine,” you monotone, hardly convincing.

He squints. “Then why aren’t you looking at me?”

“I am looking at you,” you argue just to argue, giving him a measly glance before turning away a moment later.

“No, seriously,” Eddie chuckles, reaching out to touch you. “What’s going on?”

His ringed hand caresses the outside of your elbow. You jerk back on instinct, more aggressive than you mean to be. 

“Nothing!” you huff, looking so far away from him that he can only see your profile. You grumble like a storm cloud, “You just— You make me go all weird. As you know. And fully intend.”

“That’s what this is all about?” Eddie chuckles. “You got a little crush on me?”

He reaches out for you again, this time digging his fingers into the junction of your neck. You swat him away with a harsh hand. You hate the way his touch makes your skin buzz. 

“You’re such a dick,” you groan before spinning on your heel. Your slacks swish around your ankles as you walk the very short distance to the door. Eddie’s footsteps sound much heavier in comparison as he rushes behind you. 

“Hey, hey, hey! C’mon. I’m just kidding,” he assures, still laughing as he slides his body between you and the exit. He meets your glare with a crooked smile. “It’s okay. I got a crush on you back— you know that.”

You hate how easily the words spill from his mouth, how cool he is about all of it compared to the time bomb you’ve become — tick tick ticking away as your anxiety builds. You figure this stupid crush (or whatever he wants to call it) must mean more to you than it does to him. So again, you turn away.

Eddie knocks his worn sneaker against the toe of your pleather boot. “Just because you don’t believe me doesn’t make it any less true, you know?” he tells you, quiet and suddenly serious as he tilts his cheek to his shoulder. “Doesn’t make me like you any less, either.”

His confession makes you feel funny. It makes you giddy and fills you with dread all at once. “It’s just… It’s weird,” is all you can think to say, after several long moments of silence.

“Why?”

“‘Cause I— I’m not— I don’t know,” you groan, bringing your hands to your face to hide behind your palms. “God, I did not intend to talk about this today.”

“Well, too late. We’re talking about it.”

Eddie takes a step away from the door, moving impossibly closer to you. He ducks his chin to meet your sheepish gaze, dark eyes sparkling with visible concern. 

You step back from him on instinct and talk wildly with your hands. “No! Tonight was supposed to be about you— about you’re fucking show— not about me!”

Brows raised and hidden behind his sweat-drenched bangs, he monotones. “Say it.”

A stubborn sigh puffs out your lips. “I just… I know I’m not the easiest person to talk to. Or to be around. I know that,” you confess. “I know it’s hard for people to like me, but… you do, and I really don’t fucking get it, okay? It just feels like you’re playing a big, dumb prank on me.”

Eddie stays silent for a moment, chocolate gaze unwavering as he ponders your words. 

“Wait, so…” the boy trails off, eyes squeezed shut in concentration. “You’re mean to me, but I like you anyway, and because I can see through all the— faux bitchiness or whatever— You have a hard time… being around me?”

Your eyes flit to the ceiling for a moment. You look back at him and nod. “Yeah, that’s… That’s pretty much the gist of it, yeah.”

Eddie beams before he can help it, filling the dingy room with golden sunshine. “Well, you know how we get past that, right?” he wonders and scrunches the bridge of his nose.

You get the feeling he’s teasing you still, but you entertain him anyway. “What?”

“Us being boyfriend-girlfriend—”

“Eddie,” you groan with your head tilted back, only partly pretending to be annoyed. You don’t step back from him when he inches closer to you this time, though. You don’t jerk away from his touch when his hands caress your forearms, either. 

“I know you wanna…” he lilts, pulling you closer with ringed fingers wrapped gently around your wrists. Your shoes scuff the carpet as you stumble into his chest. “It’s why I make you go all funny, right?”

You squint up at him, with hate in your eyes and your heart in your throat. “You’re so annoying,” you deadpan.

“Okay, how about this? We can just go on one date, alright?” Eddie offers, smoothing his guitar-string calloused fingers up your shoulders. “Nothin’ fancy, I promise. Just bottomless breadsticks at Enzo’s at seven. And you, bottom-less at my place at eight.”

Your knotted stomach does a backflip at his words, but you keep glaring at him anyway. “And who says you don’t know how to flirt?” you squint.

Another chuckle spills from his plush, pink lips. His tongue darts out to wet them a second later — mouth desperate to be kissed. “‘Kay. Fine. How about we just makeout in my van after closing? And I try not to be a total idiot and ruin it like last time?”

He’s much more serious now. You can see it in his very expressive button eyes. He’s borderline pleading now, for a second chance he never needed to ask for. 

You cave, far quicker and with a lot less fight than he expected. “Fine,” you shrug with an unenthusiastic huff.

Eddie smiles so big, it’s like you’ve just told him you loved him or something — all his teeth on display — so wide and full of adoration it almost hurts. 

[slayfics]

Explosive Tendencies a slow burn fanfic about the readers developing relationship with Katsuki Bakugo.

Chapter four: You study with Katsuki.

Chapter links

With the completion of the internships, the end-of-term tests were coming up. You sat at your desk studying but couldn't help but wonder how your classmates were doing.

Everyone had gone into a frenzy in class about meeting up to study and being prepared. Multiple students had planned to go over to Momo's since she was at the top of the class. But since you weren't explicitly invited, you didn't want to show up. You still hadn't really connected too much with your other classmates.

You also overheard Eijiro and Katsuki make plans to study at a diner today. Fuck it I'll show up there, you thought. Katsuki did kind of owe you for fixing his hair anyway. Worst case if they seemed super irritated by it you could play it off as if you were just going to that diner regardless. That seemed a lot easier than randomly showing up at Momo's house considering you hadn't even spoken to her much yet.

You made your way over to the diner and almost as soon as you entered you were greeted with an overly enthusiastic "Hey!" that made you jump.

Eijiro had spotted you right away and waved at you to come over. Katsuki turned around with his usual annoyed expression to see who Eijiro had so openly invited to their table.

"Oh it's you," Katsuki mumbled.

"Hey, how's the studying going?" You asked, making your way over to their table.

"Uh, not so good," Eijiro laughed. "Bakugo's trying his best but I think I'm hopeless. Sit down and join us!" He said, smiling at you.

You reluctantly sat down next to Eijiro feeling a bit anxious. Aside from the times Katuski had snuck into your room, this was the first time you had spent outside of the classroom with any of your classmates.

"I'm kind of surprised you're not at Yaoyorozu's with everyone else," Eijiro stated.

"I wasn't really invited, and I didn't want to just invite myself like everyone else," You replied.

"You had no problem inviting yourself here," Katsuki said, looking up at you from his book.

You felt frozen, guess you didn't pull off pretending to just accidentally come to the same diner.

"Ah don't be so mean Bakugo, maybe they can help me. I know you are at your wits end with me," Eijiro said, laughing.

"Yeah whatever," Katsuki grumbled.

"Now that I think about it, I guess I really haven't seen you hang out with the others much," Eijiro stated curiously.

You're face flushed at his words, was it really that obvious that you hadn't befriended anyone in your class? "I uh.. well..." You stuttered trying to figure out how to answer him.

"Hey dumb ass, are you going to chat their ear off all day or are we going to study?" Katsuki barked at him.

"Right! Let's get back to it then," Eijiro said, focusing back on his book.

The three of you studied for almost the whole day. It surprised you to see how intelligent Katsuki was, his delivery was always harsh though. He'd get frustrated easily when Eijiro couldn't pick up on something right away, but you were able to explain in a calmer manner and that seemed to help.

Although, it did still take Eijiro an extended amount of time to fully understand concepts. With the sun going down you three decided it was time to finish up.

"Wow, ok I feel prepared for the written test now! I'm just worried about the test exercises," Eijiro said.

"It'll be fine shitty hair, you worry too much. You'll both do fine, and I’ll finally be able to show everyone how worthless that nerd Deku is and how much better I am than that Icyhot bastard," Katsuki replied.

You sighed, “Bakugo I already told you- I’m pretty sure everyone knows you would have beat Todoroki regardless of him using both sides or not.”

“Hm?” Eijiro looked at you both curiously. “Told him before? You two have hung out before?” He asked.

Your face flushed at Eijiro’s correct assumption and you weren’t sure how to respond. It seemed a little suspicious to say the truth- that Katsuki had snuck into your room three times now.

“Don’t be so nosy dumb ass,” Katsuki grumbled at him.

“Oh right-! Sorry! Anyway… Maybe the test exercise will be a team exercise and we'll get paired together or something! After today I'd say the three of us make a good team," Eijiro said smiling.

You smiled back at him unsure of how to respond to so much positivity. Katsuki just rolled his eyes at Eijrio.

It was striking how night and day it was between Eijiro's cheery demeanor and Katsuki's quick temper.

Tags: @unofficialmuilover @anon-mouse223

[arminsbf]

im rlly loving armin today…..tell me somethings about him….

HI DAHLIA!!!! me too omg literally every day 💗💗💗

i don’t know if this makes any sense at all because i’m just yapping but here you go!!!

before you dated it was SO fucking obvious that you liked each other — it became a running joke in the friend group about how he was so clearly in love with you

and yet I think it would take a long time before you two actually got together!! you had to be the one to admit your feelings — because ever since he realized how he felt, he stood by NEVER telling you abt it js because he was so scared you would reject him

but… srsly… he loves you so much. he’s so much happier now that he has you and that he doesn’t have to hide it anymore!!

mf sleeps SO MUCH, especially in the summer because he’ll be out in the sun all day and come home exhausted

he loves to watch movies with you but trust half of time he will js pass out while cuddling w you!!

basically whenever he’s touching you he gets tired :( you’re js so warm n comfy… he just… 😴😴😴

but that shows how much he trusts you!!!!! you’re really one of the only people he can be vulnerable around — even w how close he is to eren and mikasa

if you have long hair, he’ll learn how to do a ponytail, and then a braid… with help from you and from youtube 😭 he thinks it looks cute on you n he likes that he did it himself :3

maybe he’ll learn a french braid if u like when he does it enough!

loves spending time with you even if you’re doing literally nothing. he enjoys js being in the same room as you even if you’re doing something else

STUDYING!!!! you know he is such a nerd… he really does spend a lot of his free time studying/doing his work. his favorite thing though is working while you’re in the room!! like I said he really js likes being around you… you don’t have to be interacting.

he just likes having you there, even if you’re just on your phone or smth! he likes hearing your breathing, and having something to look at. he feels like a weirdo because it’s not much different from being by himself — but he loves you so much and js wants to spend as much time with you as he can!!

I KNOW YOU SAID THIS BEFORE BUT HE LOVES FRUIT???? he is always eating fruit. if you like fruit too he will make you this https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTLyJ1d5B/ and eat it with you

i mentioned this once but i’m so serious he ran track in high school. he ran the 400 and HATED it but all his friends did sports and he was like okay i guess i can do this…

absolute demon at beach volleyball

always hounds you abt sunscreen because he spends so much time at the beach. “no babe you’re gonna get skin cancer you need to put it on!!!!”

but he offers to do it for you so it’s not so bad :3

he is allergic to shellfish

another thing i’ve mentioned before is that I think he gets nightmares sometimes :( he might wake you up from squirming or making noise, but then you can be there for him!

he’s usually okay right after, it’s never anything too bad — mostly just falling dreams, or maybe being chased. still leaves him feeling anxious and overwhelmed, so he’ll hold you close. with you there to calm him down he can fall back asleep peacefully

hmm i think he likes to hold your hand n kiss your forehead n your nose during sex :3

he’s super clingy w you in private but he gets so embarrassed talking about it with his friends…

like of course he’s not embarrassed to talk about you and how amazing you are but he struggles to talk about how much YOU love HIM without wanting to run and hide

cook him anything and he’s instantly proposing. he loves eating food you make even if it’s not good!!!

ice cream dates!!! he likes ice cream anddd I think his favorite flavor is mint chocolate chip

there,,, a lot of random thoughts abt my bf armin i hope you enjoyed!! 💗💗💗💗

[dethronetheveil]

Like a Villain | Part Four

Pairing: Noah x OC (Christie/Chris)

Warnings: mention of m*rder, mention of death, blood, cursing, mention of weapons, use of weapons, general violence [be careful before you read on!]

Synopsis: Part Four- Chris and Noah reunite but under quite weird circumstances. They decide to celebrate at a party, but things just continue to go south, especially for Chris.

Word Count: 2.6k

Tag List: @ladyveronikawrites , @catj422 , @asilentsiren [lmk if you would like to be tagged in the last part!]

My blood ran cold and for a second I thought I was going to fall over, from how wobbly my legs had become. It was Noah. But, why was he texting from an unknown number and why now? Should I actually go to his apartment? Is this a set up? All of these questions ran through my head as I steadied myself against the hard cement fountain that stood in the middle of the courtyard. This was where we first met. I could only remember how weird it was, and now I am receiving an equally weird text. Damn this fountain.

I pushed myself away from the centerpiece and slowly began to pace back and forth. I didn’t know how to approach this situation. I should be mad, but for some reason I was mostly feeling relief. I was so worried about him and now he was giving me a sign that he was okay. Or that’s what I thought. But, maybe I was overthinking this entire thing. I was going to go with that, because the more naive part of me wanted to see Noah again, despite all of the warning signs floating around inside my head like annoying little gnats.

I took a deep breath and practically forced myself to move from my safe spot in the courtyard towards Noah’s apartment. Luckily his apartment was on the ground floor, same as mine, so I didn't have too far to walk. My heart was racing in my chest, and I could hear my blood pumping in my ears. As I reached Noah’s door, my whole body erupted in anxious flames. I did not know what I was about to walk into, but the positive part of my brain pushed through all of the negative muck and sent my hand straight for the door. I knocked on it three times and waited for what felt like an eternity,until I saw the door handle turning. I held my breath until the door swung fully open, and Noah was standing in front of me, with a wide smile plastered across his face.

I let out the breath and gave him a short grin. Honestly, I didn’t feel like giving him a full energetic smile. He left me worried for over a week. He deserved my half-assed smile. Before I could do anything else, I felt Noah wrap his long arms around me and pull me in for a hug. My body did not respond with his and I kept my arms at my side as he squeezed me for a second. He let go, noticing my obvious discomfort.

He looked at me inquisitively, “What’s wrong, Chris?”

It took me a minute to process the fact that he had asked me that question. I couldn’t help but scoff, “Are you fucking kidding me?”

I think Noah could tell this was going to be a more in depth conversation, so he just opened his door wider, and I wordlessly walked in. If I weren’t so taken aback by the oddities of this entire situation, I think I would have liked his apartment, but at that moment, everything was annoying me. He had a plain brown couch, with two pillows on them. Mismatched. He had anime posters hanging on the walls and what I could only assume was a katana displayed in the corner of the living room. What a fucking nerd. I physically rolled my eyes and plopped down on the couch, waiting for him to make his way over to the living room. He sat on the other end of the couch and sighed.

“Are you mad?”

“Are you stupid?”

Noah placed his hand to his chest, “Ouch.”

Usually I am never this up front or abrupt, but he left me confused and stressed for over a week with no sign or word as to where he was, and now he was acting like nothing had happened. I could feel the heat rising in my face, but I wanted to try and stay as calm as I possibly could, “Noah, you left. For over a week. I didn’t get one text, one call, I got nothing. And all of a sudden you’re back, texting from an unknown number, and you’re acting like everything is all fine and normal? How the fuck am I supposed to react?”

Noah just raised his eyebrows and let out a short cough, “I-I lost my phone. I dropped it in a puddle and I had to get a new one.”

“Noah, that literally only explains one small detail of all my concerns. Where were you?”

He sighed, “I just- I had to take some time away. These murders… they’re really really getting to me.”

“Noah, they’re getting to me too. We were supposed to help each other.”

“Chris, my mom was murdered. When I was 10.”

I felt all of the blood in my body rush to my feet, and I wanted so badly to take back everything I had said about five seconds ago. But also, I had no idea, “Noah, I-I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize. You didn’t know. I don’t like to talk about it. It was really difficult. She was kind of like my best friend. And then one day, she went to that little convenience store, you know, on Oakley, and some guy was robbing the store. Mom just so happened to be there at the worst time and she… she got shot. She was dead on the scene. My dad and I didn’t know how to handle it, how to cope. My dad definitely took it worse than I did. He drank himself to death. So, I just needed to get away.”

I could hardly process all of the information Noah had just given me. It would make sense as to why he would need some space, though. I couldn’t blame him for that. I gently placed my hand on top of his and looked up at him, “I am so sorry, Noah. For what I said. For everything, but I’ve got you.”

He just smiled and leaned closer to me, placing a soft kiss against my lips and pulling away almost immediately. I was a bit disappointed, because I hadn’t kissed him in a while, but I understood why he didn’t feel like prolonging anything.

“Thank you, Chris. You’re incredible.”

I could feel a blush rising to the surface of my skin, “Stop, you’re making me blush. But, you’re not too shabby yourself,” I replied with a chuckle.

He responded with a chuckle as well and ran his hand through his hair,”I do have a random question. Would you want to go to a party with me tonight? It’s a whole costume party thing so I get if you wouldn’t want to…”

I let out a louder laugh than I anticipated, “Sorry, sorry. That was just a horrible segway.”

He laughed shyly, “Yea,yea. You’re not wrong.”

“But, as long as you promise not to bail on me anymore, then I guess I will go with you.”

He shot me a snarl, followed with a laugh, “Okay, I can try and make that work.”

***

We arrived at the house, like an actual house, not an apartment, and the music was already blaring and people were already puking in the yard. I had never been the biggest fan of big parties, but I felt safe with Noah by my side. He was dressed in all black and had some sort of devil mask on, and I was dressed in a corset-type top, with a black skirt, and devil horns. All things I randomly found in my closet.

Before we made our way in, Noah turned to me, “So, this is my friend Folio’s house. Nick Folio, but he goes by Folio. My other friends Nick and Jolly will be here too. I want to introduce you to them.”

I nodded along as he told me each of their names, “So there are two Nicks and a Jolly.”

“Well, that’s why we call Folio Folio. Makes things easier.”

“Okay, that makes sense. Your friends have some interesting names though.”

He just laughed and led me through the front door and we immediately beelined our way to the kitchen, where all of Noah’s friends were, except Folio. Jolly was a tall, slender man with long brown hair, and he seemed very quiet. He wasn’t really dressed up and he just threw me a few smiles here and there. Nick was shorter and was covered in tattoos. His black hair was pulled up into a bun and he was dressed like a nun.

“Nice nun costume,” I commented through a chuckle.

“Thank you, thank you. You must be Chris. Noah has told us-”

Nick stopped talking and I could tell Noah was shooting daggers at him through his eyes, so Nick immediately put his hands up in surrender, “My bad. All I meant was, we are excited to finally meet you.”

I smiled, “Well, it’s nice to finally meet you too.”

Before anyone could say anything else, a sweaty guy without a shirt on came busting through the kitchen and bombarded our group. He threw an arm around Noah and smiled at me, “You must be Chris. I’m Folio, at your service. Welcome to mi casa,” he held his hand out for me to shake and I did so, but only for a second. I meant it when I said he was sweaty.

“Did you just finish running a marathon,” I asked.

“Hoo hoo,she’s quick, Noah! But no, I’ve just been running around here like a fool, trying to make sure none of these assholes puke on my floor or fuck in my bed.”

I nodded my head once, “Noted. Well, from the looks of it, I’d say you’re doing an adequate job.”

“Thank you. I pride myself on being the host that keeps the fun outside.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. Folio was a character.

“I’ve gotta run to the bathroom. Are you okay if I leave you with the guys, Chris,” Noah asked.

“Yea, that’s totally fine. Gives me more time to try and get Jolly to talk.”

“Hey, I talk. Just only when it’s something important,” he raised an eyebrow and went back to his vow of silence. And with that, Noah had already walked off and I was left alone with three dudes I just met.

“So, Chris, tell us about you,” Folio moved closer to me and leaned his body against the counter so that he was now facing me.

“What do you want to know?”

“Hmm, what’s your favorite color?”

This reminded me of the time Noah and I talked about our favorite colors and how hard he bullied me for mine. “Wow, I am glad you’re going for the important things. But, it’s umm orange.”

“Goddamnit, not orange.”

“What’s so wrong with orange? Noah gave me the same shit! What’s your favorite color, Folio?”

“Green,” he replied with a large grin.

“That’s just as bad as or-” before I could finish, there was a shrill scream that pierced the air, but no one except the four of us noticed or cared. The other party goers probably thought that was just a normal party scream. Each of us looked at each other with concern.

Just as Folio pushed himself off the counter, Noah came running down the stairs towards us with blood covering his hands. I instinctively took a step back when he made his way over to us, but he was panting and he looked concerned.

“Th-there’s a girl. Sh-she is dead I-I think. Dude, I think the murderer might be here.”

My legs turned into jelly for the second time tonight and I immediately felt like I couldn’t breathe. I grabbed onto the counter for support and I just shook my head, “What the fuck,” was all I could muster up.

“Well, someone needs to go inspect the area, see what happened. What we can find,” Folio said.

“How about we go in teams and see if we find anything suspicious. We can’t have anyone else dying tonight,” said Noah.

Jolly and Nick looked at each other, obvious nervousness clouding their eyes, but they reluctantly agreed anyway, “Jolly and I can go look outside,” Nick responded.

“Okay good good, yea. Chris and I can take upstairs and Folio, you take downstairs.”

My head snapped up when I heard my name and I shook my head even faster, “Noah, I-I can’t. I didn’t sign up for this.”

“Chris, I need you.”

My entire head felt dizzy and my heart was pounding in my chest, but I knew I couldn’t abandon Noah, so I too reluctantly agreed. We all looked at one another and silently split up into our groups. Noah took my hand in his and squeezed it gently. He smiled down at me and looked back at Folio before he and I began our trek up the stairs.

As we climbed the stairs, one by one, my head felt lighter and lighter. It felt like the oxygen was getting thinner and I could hardly breathe. I balanced myself against Noah’s arm and remembered he had blood still all over his hands. I gulped, “Noah, I-I can’t look at a dead body. I’m sorry, I can’t.”

“We can start somewhere else. I don’t want to see it again either.”

I nodded and we finished walking up the flight of stairs. We started searching the first room at the end of the hall, which looked like it might have been Folio’s. We detached from each other and walked around the room. I was inspecting every little item Nick had. This guy was really into fish. He had catalogs, pictures, even one of those talking fish placards that your dad would have in his garage in the 80s.

I continued to look around, but could tell my footsteps were the only ones present. I stopped where I was and looked around. Noah was nowhere to be found, and I began to panic once again. What if the killer got him? What if the killer was in this room? I began to scramble around the room, looking for anything that I could use as a weapon, while simultaneously calling for Noah.

I found a baseball bat next to Folio’s bed and I grabbed it with both of my hands and made sure I had it ready. Right then, I felt a hand on my arm and my whole body jumped. Before I could turn around and put the baseball bat to good use, I heard a familiar voice whisper in my ear, “Don’t be scared. Now that we’re alone, we can have a little fun.” My body shuddered, and to make matters worse, the person behind me then placed a silver knife to my throat. Its cold exterior caused a shiver to run down my spine and my entire body began to tremble from pure fear.

“Drop the bat,” the voice whispered once again.

I could feel tears welling up in my eyes and I knew this would be my last night on earth. There was no way I was going to survive this.

“I said put the fucking bat down,” the voice said louder this time. I obeyed and dropped the bat. This only received a chuckle from the voice, as he pressed the knife even closer to my skin.

I was fully shaking at this point and I could not see a way out of this, so I horsley asked the voice, “Why are you doing this, Folio?”

[strangewiggles]

pathologic furry designs because im a nerd

(aglaya, rubin, and lara, *ft artemy)

i usually dont post uncolored drawings/doodles but i plan on making a few of these

HUGE thanks to my buddies for help/input on these..both are huge brained and awesome at art follow them now

heres the thought process (spoiler free, mostly based on patho 2)

me and my buddies were in a call for all of these and we had a very intellectual conversation about all of them. when looking for furry designs i usually think of personality, mannerisms, and likeness.

Aglaya, Shoebill

both of the friends i asked havent played the game past day 5 (one of them is on day 2) so i asked “what animal would she be” with just a picture of her model. i was interested to see what 2 people who’ve only seen her once (in the intro) would think of her purely on vibes and brief dialogue. the first suggestion was “some kinda bird” and that seemed to stick.

a bit tall, a bit intimidating. so we threw out Herons, Ostriches, Peacocks…

Shoebill seemed to fit. I wanted a bird that was either grey or black, some kinda desaturated color but also one that was tall and a bit scary. Shoebills are definitely considered pretty scary. theyre also super tall and i remember saying in the call "these things are huge if i saw them flying i would cry." when it comes to shoebills, i imagine them towering over most other animals, especially with that neck and beak! they're also ambush predators i believe. shoebills fit Aglaya's first impressions perfectly.

i almost made her a Dalmatian... im glad i didnt...

Rubin, Skinny Pig

I wasn't even going to initially draw Rubin here... it started by me asking "who'd be a naked mole rat?" and the immediate answer was "Rubin..." which made me remember that he was bald LMAO. I figured that fit a little, and the original drawing was him as a naked mole rat. a few things werent quite right though.

first, digging. i cant imagine Rubin as an animal who's entire thing is digging around and being dirty, he's a doctor and, other than blood, i can't imagine he'd wanna be dirty...

second, social groups. as far as i know, naked mole rats are very social within their own circles? just from the early game (as early as the first 3 days?) he's pretty antisocial and seems to have a distaste for the Kin, even if influenced by grief(the emotion not the person). he even seems reluctant to be close to close friends.

and, of course, moles have to be saved for someone else... we'll get there. WINK

..i dont remember how Skinny Pigs came up, i think i was just googling them and thought they were funny since i have a friend who owns some.. i did a bit of googlin and asking my buddy in the call about skinny pig mannerisms.. theyre pretty...territorial? at least males to other males, theyre pretty aggressive as far as i know. this definitely fit Rubin. the OTHER reason for any kind of guinea pig was considered was because of the concept of "test guinea pigs" and not in a literal sense, but just the concept, because of Rubin's connection to Isidor. i will say i felt like the smartest person on earth when i thought of that.

also the cute ears absolutely influenced the decision.

Lara, Generic Ass Wolf

Lara was genuinely so difficult... unlike the other two, there were literally no suggestions being thrown out. my description was something like "maybe something small, cute, short tempered, but social?" and, for some reason, that was a tall order. my first guess was a mouse, but that wasnt perfect... we thought we'd have to turn to bugs and fish, though a lot of bugs and fish are hard to find personalities for.. at a surface level at least. we decided to save bugs and fish for other people...

and then, the suggestion of "wolf" came up, albeit reluctantly. when it comes to furry-fying characters, wolves and dogs are definitely...up there, in terms of "most used/obvious".. but really, think about it.

Believe it or not, wolves can be a little anxious, if not in a way that presents itself as anger/defense. this is also how i described Lara, "anxious in a way that presents as anger." also, wolves, while sometimes being a little solitary, are commonly in packs. which is...Lara's, like, Whole Thing. a house for the living etc etc..

I don't think i need to explain wolves too much either way. theyre The Furry Animal. whatever you know about wolves is probably true for Lara. it seems low-effort but trust me this decision took forever LMAO

and i mean...look at her. she looks like a wolf

*Artemy here is a bull because... yeah. that's the most obvious one. as #1 artemy fan i couldn't in good conscious make him anything other than a bull even if it's low effort idgaf... ill look at types of bulls for him later.

hope you liked my rambles..

[literaticat]

Hi, Jenn! I got some feedback that I need to strengthen my dialogue. I know the feedback didn’t come from you, so you can’t say for sure, but in your opinion, how does an author strengthen dialogue?

I think problems with dialogue often fall into one or more of these buckets: Either it's hard to differentiate the characters (everyone sounds the same), or the dialogue doesn't have the ring of authenticity (this 3rd grader sounds like a college professor, this lawyer sounds like a tween, etc.), or it's just sort of "meh" or pointless (the dialogue is not sparkling, and isn't revealing anything about the characters or furthering the story or DOING anything).

So the first step might be to try to pinpoint the problem a little more clearly. Perhaps it would help to get a trusted reader to read *with dialogue specifically in mind* and get further feedback. It might also help to read your own work aloud and see if the dialogue SOUNDS clunky - are these things a real person would or could actually say?

A thought exercise: Consider how different characters would approach the same kind of conversation. Take a random situation -- somebody giving a tour at the Zoo. A nerdy kid is going to give a very different tour than a 1930's mobster from Chicago, or a mom, or a teen girl. If you know your characters well, you know that they probably have wants and secrets that would inform how they approach such a conversation. Maybe the Nerd really wants to be the center of attention and is showing off because he knows EVERYTHING about animals, this is his time to shine; he might use technical language, or maybe include esoteric animal puns. Maybe the mobster is actually afraid of animals but doesn't want to appear un-tough, maybe he'd describe the animals like they are other gangsters, or cops. The mom is worried about the safety of her group, she's anxious but wants to appear in control, she might get shrill and nervous. The teen girl is trying to impress a cool guy in her group, but doesn't know anything about the animals at all so she's making it up on the fly. Even though the setting, the animals, and the route is the same in each instance, you can totally see how those Zoo tours would be completely different, right?

Now, think about your own manuscript. Where are your characters from? What's their background and education level? Who are they speaking to? (All of those might affect their choice of words and tone). What are their secrets, unspoken fears and wants? What do they need and what are they hiding? (These might inform how they react to things and what they choose to say or not disclose in a given situation).

(And... this might sound obvious, but hey -- listen to a lot of people of the same age as your characters!)

[pompadourpink]

Hi mom! I need some advice ! I trust your opinion , im so sorry that this will be a long one ! Im starting my freshmen year at college this fall, after a prep year. I want to open an instagram account , i like taking pictures and i want to keep up with my friends from prep year. The thing is i am a socially anxious person. And when i was in middle school i was made fun of because i had so little followers ( like 25 smthing) and i got sad and closed my account. I was 12 when that happened, i was also being bullied in many other ways. So i am afraid now that people will mock me for not having many followers and they will think im unsociable or uncool or something like that. The thing is i also think instagram is a fake place, but many school clubs announce things there and in college you just want to fit in. Also i was the nerd all my school life, i got no attention from boys whatsoever. I got really insecure, all the people that saw me this year tell me that i have changed so much, now i get compliments about my looks but i still feel unconfident. When it comes to interacting with boys all my friends tell me im too unapproachable. Maybe an ig account will help that? honestly idk. and i know that im overthinking this issue but that’s me unfortunately 😭

part 1

part 2

actually i hate ig flirting? like what does liking a story even mean i hate that kind of stuff. But appearently my generation dont know how to make a move in real life because all the relationships i know of starts online. I cant complain because i could have made a move? but i didnt because im anxious and sometimes insecure because of all the bullying i got in middle school. They made fun of me in unimaginably cruel ways , it still has affects on me years later. I am so desperate for male attention, like i was wearing a tshirt that was slightly wide in the collar and a classmate checked me out , i got really happy! How silly is that! Because i was told that thet were disgusted to even look at me before and they dont consider me as a woman !

Now i go to the best college in the country, i changed a lot physically ( that doesnt matter, i could stay ugly and they had no right) and they are still horrible human beings. Sorry to burden you with all these stuff, it took another turn .

Since i got shit treatment for being ugly earlier in my life, i guess i need validation, posting pretty pictures and being hit on by boys and it sounds silly to me but it is like that.

What do you think about this issue? I know that it’s a bit all over the place , sorry about that! Lots of love ❤️❤️❤️

*

Hello dear,

There is a lot to unpack here so Dr Talks too much is back in office.

Of course, get IG if you feel like it. You were 12 long ago, those people are probably not in your life anymore (and if they are, they should get fired, no one will arrest you). I also have a ridiculous number of followers and don't ever think about it (at least they actually care when I post): that is not what we are here for, numbers mean nothing and anyone who tries to tell you anything different doesn't deserve a place in your life.

You are at an age where this type of desire makes sense. If you want a collage of the things you love to make yourself feel happy and discover yourself, do it. And yes, if people find your account and like it, you could make some friends. And if they don't and mock you, you know who to avoid.

The rant about loneliness is worrying me greatly. If I could go back and talk to my 18-year-old self, I would tell her to drop the boy-obsessed attitude. The truth is that being desperate is a bad look, but also a very obvious one. You can get groomed easily because what you want is flagrant and any guy at least a little bit charming will drive you insane by just maintaining eye contact and smiling. And if a man can be super lazy and still get you, he will do exactly that and play with you until he's bored and dumps you without a care in the world. That is not a compliment. There are too many stories of women who put men first and got fucked over for people your age to try it and think it will go differently. Make yourself the main character of your life instead of forcing yourself to live in the shadow of people who don't even seem to like you.

Now, some homework:

Watch this. Excellent advice from a 20-year-old lady making the best out of loneliness instead of letting it destroy her.

And this. What happens when girls are boy-obsessed. If you have time, watch the show. The entire world agrees that Carrie is the worst character of the series because she's a shit friend, doesn't learn from her mistakes, and can't be trusted.

And finally, worry about yourself. There are billions of men on Earth and many will find you attractive. You have a long life ahead of you. A nice body is not enough to keep a guy and even models get cheated on. Don't date someone because he liked your cleavage. Having low confidence is a curse because it turns you into a people pleaser, and that just makes you a liar and an easy victim. People can't know you if there's no one to know. A great personality is what makes people stick. Listen to yourself, try fun things, find a therapist, and get a couple of hobbies. Get yourself some girlfriends and do things with them, strengthen your circle, make yourself a person worthy of being befriended or dated, and one day someone will say oh, there's that guy I used to know in high school, I think you would really like him. Don't force it. Don't chase. Only accept someone truly happy to be around you, or sentence yourself to have to heal from relationships forever.

Love,

Mum

[linawritestwst]

Ah! Congrats on 1k! I'm so happy for you! Here's to many more! 💙

I'd like a matchup, but if you get too overwhelmed, scrap mine and do a different one, I promise I'll be okay 😂

Pronouns are she/her, mbti INTJ and Zodiac is Libra.

Personality : I like to joke that the only personality I have left is "tired" 😂 But other things about me are, I'm a little wary of new people, but once you're in I'm ridiculously loyal (like a cat). I take care of everyone before myself. Think mom friend. I'm kind of a nerd....(don't look at my blog it'll out me as a huge nerd, just trust me) . My only hobbies right now are writing and video games, but I have a "secret" past as a reader, and a theatre kid. I have been described as "the darkest lightest person I've ever met" "if you were a puppy at a shelter, I'd adopt you" and "you got that fae vibe, like if I give you my name or say the wrong thing, you'll own my soul." I can't make decisions and have memory issues. I like dragons too much, and I hope to one day afford to dress like a well educated pirate, who still pillages the village, but waxes on about the state of humanity as she drinks chamomile tea. A pirate witchy dark princess vibe, you know?(idk if that helps 😂)

What I need in a partner/don't need:

I am heavily introverted and socially anxious...but I only make friends when an extrovert just adopts me. So I probably need an extrovert, or an assertive introvert.

Imy love language (receiving) is quality time and words of affirmation, and (giving) gift giving and words of affirmation.

I have lots of texture issues, so maybe someone who's not super touchy. They can be a little touchy, though, since this is fictional.

Someone not to loud too. I get panic attacks when startled, and cry around loud noises sometimes. (Oh my God, I'm literally a rabbit 😭)

Silly things about me for if you are having writers block: I'm 5'3 1/4", I have been told I have the worst handwriting in the world, I am known for tripping over nothing, I don't sit still for long, I get distracted by shiny things and cats, I hate to be warm, and love the cold, my friend and I write modern comedy adaptations of Shakespeare, and other literature.

Hope this is enough. Again, congratulations!!!!!!!!!!

thank you so much!! 🥺💖💞 i hope you like your matchup <3

the character that i think would be a good partner for you is..

malleus draconia!

now, this one might seem obvious or predictable because of your pfp but!! i really do think you and malleus would be a cute couple!!

i'll explain why i chose him:

okay, yeah, malleus would definitely appreciate having a loyal partner. your kindness is one of the many reasons why he loves you, but he'd want you to take care of yourself too though :( and don't worry about being a nerd!! he's a nerd too!! have you seen how his eyes light up whenever gargoyles are mentioned?? and he would love to know more about your interests, he doesn't think they're "boring" or "weird" at all!

oh, this man would want to protect you from everything so bad. he's surely intrigued by that mysterious energy you have, but he still focuses more on that soft and cute puppy vibe. because come on, he's malleus draconia, he's the one with the dark fae energy here HJSHJNDJDJD. and you liking dragons makes him so happy because it means you most likely won't find his dragon form scary! also i find it cute to imagine you two sharing a braincell because i think it's not that easy for malleus to make decisions sometimes, haha. though he would probably wait for you to decide, because he just really wants to agree with you and go "!! you're right!! we're gonna go with this option then :)" so take your time, don't worry, he's very patient when it comes to you at least

i don't think that malleus is that extroverted, but he would probably be a more assertive kind of introvert when you're around. and i think malleus is sort of.. "forced" to be an introvert? considering that he wants to socialize, make friends and attend parties and events, but he doesn't always have the opportunity.. also, he just gets that protective instinct when he sees you, so yeah, you're adopted now. about your texture issues, malleus would make sure to respect your boundaries and even though he would love to hug you/hold your hand/etc, he doesn't want to hurt you, so he will be careful! he can express his love for you in other ways too :) and he's not the loudest kind of person, so you don't have to worry about that either!

[professionallydeadinside]

please post the great gatsby rant <33 ive only read the book and recently started watching the movie (i watch movies in parts bc brain scrambled) i need to know what makes the movie fucked <3

Alright here it is, directly copy pasted from the google doc it was birthed from (i cant put a read under cut on my phone I’m so sorry)

Alright so fuck the movie version of the great gatsby so much it’s so not great there is like one thing it does correctly and that’s Tom and Nick being friends because come on!!!! THEY WENT TO COLLEGE TOGETHER I WOULDVE LOVED A CONVERSATION BETWEEN THEM LIKE A HEART TO HEART WHILE NICK KNOWS ALL THE GATSBY DAISY BULLSHIT AND HE HAS TO DECIDE WHETHER OR NOT HE WANTS TO TELL TOM but also they just don’t interact like they know each other in the book and that’s kinda sad because they went to Yale together I’m pretty sure!! Gimme some black out years content where they talk about shit like is nick the one that introduces Tom and daisy??

THERES POTENTIAL,,, like in the movie Tom literally sack of potatoe carries Nick into a room and I was like okay that’s good that’s dude bro behavior making your bookish friend get drunk and do drugs wajsjjdndj but everythielse was atrocious like Nick??? I don’t know if this was just how tobey acts or like a conscious decision of his to act like this but I did not like how they made Nick some nerdy little dude like he’s not nerdy!!! He’s not “gets shoved into a locker” type he’s like green heather!! Okay maybe not like green heather but he’s the right hand man to the main bitch who like smugly records a dude getting bullied by Tom and has the ability to anime shine his glasses HES LIKE SIMON YHE CHIPMUNK I DONT FUUCKING KNOW HE IS NOT SOME SHY NERD!!

Also the movie correctly showed like none of Nick and Jordan’s relationship because it was literally so mediocre and not needed like I don’t understand what it contributes to the story?? It 100% could’ve been better if it was just developed/talked about more. But I remember in the movie Jordan was taller then Nick so that’s a girl boss point. AND FUCKING GATSBY GOD DO I HAVE SHIT ON GATSBY OKAY in the book he isn’t that bad of a dude!! He personally reads like a bit of a clueless romantic! He’s doing all of this for a girl he likes what a loverboy! BUT IN TJE MOVIE THEY MAKE EVERYTHING HE SAYS SO MALICIOUS??? Like okay there’s one scene where gatsby takes Nick out ot lunch with some other business dude and business dude first mistakes Nick for someone gatsby is like hiring? Something like that but the mistake seems like the business dudes fault in the book like “oh lol gatsby has a shady friend!” But in the movie they put it like it’s directly gatsbys doing?? Like gatsby is seething through his teeth saying that that isn’t who Nick is. Also in that scene gatsby leaves because he’s getting called and the movie makes it so obvious that gatsby is telling the business dude like “put a good word in for me or I’ll kill you” BUT HES BEEN CALLED BEFORE IN OTHER SCENES IN THE BOOK??? LIKE THE PARTY SCENE HE GETS CALLED AWAY SO ITS NOT WEIRD HES EXCUSING HIMSELF TO GET CALLS!! HES A BUSINESSMAN!!! A POPULAR DUDE!! It’s not shady at all for him to get called away and why would he lie about that!!

They took all gatsbys anxious lines of “god I hope Nick likes me and I hope he works with me to get daisy :)” and made it all “I’m lying to Nick to manipulate him into luring daisy here” LIKE HE JUST SEEMS LIKE AN AWKWARD DUDE?? I do not see the bad behaviour like i get it he’s not necessarily a good person, he hides his past self but it’s not like he murdered someone and he’s running from it he literally just wants to be rich!! Daisy wants to be rich too but she wasn’t portrayed like she was only with gatsby for his money!! ALSO HE TELLS NICK!! He gets close enough to Nick to tell him he’s not wanting to hide it!! Nick like had no previous leads that gatsby wasn’t who he said he was besides those spare rumors if I remember correctly but gatsby tells him because he trusts Nick!! He like has not been close enough to anyone else besides Nick to tell!!! THEY LITERALLY MAKE ALL OF HIM SO UNCOMFORTABLE?? Like when gatsby is nervous about Nick hosting Daisy for him in the book he like mows nicks lawn the day before and it’s kinda funny like “oh he’s so nervous! He’s so in love and anxious about seeing daisy :)” BUT IN THE MOVIE ITS LIKE GATSBY JUST TAKES COMPLETE CONTROL

[gay-dorito-dust]

Asexual reader x jason todd or alternatively a quiet sensitive shy reader who has anxiety…. Or just all of that together :3 also, when people write a shy anxious reader they tend to make them book nerds, and I like books but I haven’t read many so I wouldn’t say I’m a book worm, so… maybe not a huge book worm reader :3 I’d like Jason to read to me tho :3 thank you! It’s cool that you’re ace too!

Kinda shitty ending, couldn’t think of anything good even for a fake book but enjoy I guess.

There were once a time where you did everything in your power to avoid the man they called Jason Todd. To you he was intimidating just by his sheer size alone with how he towered over you and automatically you assumed he was nothing more then a muscle headed, misogynistic dickhead who adheres to unhealthy masculine societal norms. He made your body go into into a fight or flight stance so that you could rush towards the nearest exit if the occasion if inklings of hostility were to ever to arise.

However these were be proven wrong later down the line where after helping you in making a doctors appointment after noting the tense body language, the almost robotic responses that he assumed you must’ve practiced in your head on more then one occasion before picking up the phone, feeling particularly confident in your abilities; Until you punched in the number that was before Jason decided to take over in order to elevate you of the pressure. It wasn’t until then that you began to see Jason for who he really was, now finding comfort in him then you did before and even found yourself staying close to his side whenever you went out late at night; being all too aware of how dangerous the streets of Gotham could get.

He was unbelievably patient with you whenever you backed out on outgoings mere moments before in favour of being in the comfort of your hastily built apartment, dressed in your favourite pair of sweatpants and hoodie; Jason would only follow your lead without a single complaint falling from his lips before changing out of his attire into something more comfortable before joining you on the couch afterwards claiming that he didn’t feel like going out anyways.

“Whatcha got there sweetheart?” Jason asked as he stepped into the apartment he found himself spending more and more time in, removing his jacket only to place it onto the back of a nearby chair as he stripped himself of his boots and gear before putting on a pair of drawstring sweats and a sleeveless hoodie from one of the drawers of your room that he always kept when he was too tired to make it back to his own place; thankful of the fact that your pace was within walking distance. “A book.” You stated from your place on the couch as though it was obvious, clutching the aforementioned book against your chest. It was a book recommended by a friend of yours who was an avid bookworm and considering how picky they were towards what they deem was worth reading, they held this particular one in the highest regards.

It wasn’t anything original nor astounding in terms of writing or premise but you guessed the pacing was something to take note of if you were a novice within the writing industry; other then that the story and characters were incredibly complex and had taken you on many false leads and dead ends that once you finish it the pieces would finally click in your head. “I can see that,” Jason’s voice brought you out from your internal review of the book to see him now sitting next to you on the couch, looking over your shoulder; using his fingers to push the book away from your chest to see the cover, “I just wanna see what could possibly take your attention away from me.” He teased lightly as he took advantage of your stunned silence in peeling the book away from your grasp so he could read the blurb.

“The accursed mirror is a fictional tale following the journey of a mercenary who’s soul is trapped within a mirror after an unfortunate death. It seems as though the mirror has more in mind for him as traumatic events of his past come back to haunt him.” He looked over at you before back to the book, already opening it to the first chapter, “mind if I read it aloud?” You didn’t say anything other then wordlessly make yourself comfortable against Jason’s side, head tucked in the junction between his shoulder and the underside of his jaw as his the hand not holding the book rested at your side; pulling you into his lap where his breath made the hairs on the back of your neck stand. It wasn’t intimate by any means but it was more or less out of a necessary need to be comforted, to be within safe hands even in the walls of your own home and Jason was the one you thrived comfort from.

Jason chuckled at this but didn’t add anything else other then kissing the top of your head before bringing his chin to rest against your head as he tucked you further into himself before beginning the first paragraph of the story. “Waking up within a mirror was the least of Gerald’s worries. It was how he got here that concerned him most. He wasn’t bleeding out on some nobleman’s floors as he was supposed to be looking into the eyes of the person who bested him at his own game as the life drained from his skin.” Jason’s voice was enriching the written literature that you found yourself in able to stay awake long enough for him to finish the page never-less chapter. So much so his words became muffled in your ears as you practically melted into his arms, eyes heavy with sleep while he continued, completely unaware of the sleeping person on his lap.

“Gerald once though he was bound for greatness but now that all seemed nothing more then a distant dream belonging to that of a child’s and he was no child…he hadn’t been in a long time.”

[headkiss]

okay, listen:

i always go for inexperienced/oblivious!reader bc that’s literally me bUT! steve slowly working his way from friend to lover with an inexperienced reader exactly because she’s inexperienced, right? he’s not blind or dumb enough to not see how obvious she is in her affections for him, she doesn’t have that little voice in her head that urges her to hide how she feels, so i imagine her clutching a book against her chest and kinda rocking back and forth slightly while smiling this really big and really lovestruck smile at steve when he’s giving her his undecided attention which he does often and he just knows she returns his feelings. she oblivious tho! no boy has ever been interested in her! and stevie is just being nice, right?… she doesn’t try to hide how she feels but she can’t comprehend the hints he gives her and it’s all very sweet and robin is their number one fan and the lunch club always roll their eyes because steve being a romantic? ew. steve in boyfriend mode? ew. them looking at each other like they’re in love? ew. and how aren’t they together already??? lots of exasperated max for sure!— and she’s giggly and blushy and gets excited about dumb things and has a bit of a luna lovegood vibe going on, y’know? she’s relatively new in town, so she naturally gravitated towards steve because he made her feel safe and comfortable since he noticed straight away that she had anxiety when he first met her ( a tried to flirt but went over her head and she was very shy and nervous ) and so she’s friends with the whole gang by now and the gang only. and they love her! the kids are crazy about her because she’s a huge nerd and it makes steve’s heart all warm 🥺 ! she’s never been very social, always too anxious to put herself out there, but she’s very bubbly and unintentionally funny to and with her new friends friends! she’s had friends!,but it makes it so she gets flustered by steve very easily and he adores it, adores her, so he’s more than happy to go with the slow burn of things, he’s fine with it being a long haul type thing, he’s in it for the long haul tbh, but when they get together he fucking breaks— every touch and kiss drives him insane, he’s her first kiss and it ruins him, he gets needy and whiny and desperate and he needs her close, he’s touch starved but only for her, and she feels the same okay? but she’s inexperienced !!! so she gets overwhelmed and maybe she tears up while they kiss? and steve is concerned at first and tries to pull away which is almost fucking painful for him but his need to care for her is huge so “you okay? did i hurt you, i’m sorry i-“ and his mind immediately goes to his angel is upset! fix it!, he pulls back but she whines and grips his shirt and pouts and tries to cling to him “nonono, no, please” and it makes him hot all over but then steve understands “just overwhelmed then, huh?” and he goes full soft dom!steve and wipes her tears or kisses them off and they keep kissing and kissing and kissing and he’s so soft and gentle with her and maybe she nervously asks if this means he’s hers now and it drives him insane because that’s all he wants to be “say you want me and i’m yours forever” 🤯

this is waaay too specific so feel free to ignore ily bye

OMG OMG THIS IS SO CUTE

he would notice you right away thinking, why haven’t i ever seen her before???, and flirts with you so fast and gets all soft when you’re too shy to reciprocate AHHH i feel like you’d just say random stuff like whatever’s on your mind and he thinks that’s the cutest thing ever and he indulges you EVERY TIME!!!

once they’re together the gang is all like “mom and dad!!” and “we knew it” and all that they would not shut up about those two ik it and they would tease them but secretly be the happiest ever to see steve get the love he deserves and they all love u for him and him for u YUP

i feel like u wrote a whole fic there and i loved it ily too 🫶

[strangerfigs]

i imagine that mike was feeling the same way (anxious) about seeing e/ before 4x1 as he was in 4x8 upon rescuing her. like I think this is not discussed enough, like mike explicitly says he should not be feeling that way, as so many other important things are going on - but it’s more than that. his gf has been in trouble and they are saving her, they don’t even know she is ok? but he is worried about how he’ll approach her, about how he’ll resolve things with her. he says he is scared of her not needing him but - she literally already went off on her own, concluding on her own she doesn’t need him, kind of? (which is another thing we need to discuss more often) and I just think it’s so particular to be thinking about that, to not be more relieved at seeing her after her being in danger, like (!) is saving her here not proving that she does still need mike? like it’s just such a weird thing. and like his behavior at the airport with her is also so weird - he does not seem as excited as she does, he seems districted and un-genuine. like there are weird vibes before they even fight. everyone noticed and called it ‘bad acting.’ like i truly think that this relationship gives him so much anxiety at this point.

he has to pretend to be something he is not; even if just in the perspective of being a “nerd” like why does this /trope/ completely disappear with mike in season 3 and 4? sure he can still be goofy and a dork but the person he is in season 1/2/4x1 is different than who he is with el, and he even says “she is going to find out I’m just some nerd!!” like, we literally see him using metaphors of D&D/references to the party with everyone except el? and it’s different than lumax like lucas may try to be cool in front of max but he doesn’t hide his interests/try to be someone he is not with knock-off clothing

it’s funny because i never rly noticed mike’s lack of nerd/ness with el before but it’s so obvious to me after he pointed it out.

but him hiding being a nerd is just foreshadowing that he is hiding part of himself. the bigger picture… him being queer.

season 3, when el comes around, we see a lot less of mike, mike as his own character and the camera trying to catch his thoughts without others around. in season 3, I’m not sure if we get more than a handful of scenes in which mike is main focus of the scene.

both in a story-telling perspective, visual, wardrobe, verbal and behavioral way we get hints of mike pretending to be someone he is not and hiding parts of himself from those around him. it is clear in both of these seasons that mike has taken a step back on the metaphorical stage lol.

which is just !! so interesting. i really wish argyle didn’t interrupt the scene at the pizza place. because it’s weird that will needed to remind him that he was the heart/encourage to keep going with el if he was ready to tell her he loves her in the pizza place. if he was ready to tell her, then wouldn’t he have immediately said it to el himself? wouldn’t he not need that push or reminder? wouldn’t it be more urgent to him to make sure that she knows he loves her?

despite their physical affection in 4x8/4x9, honestly it all seemed platonic. el saying she missed him sounded platonic. their reunion felt platonic. i don’t think we see it but i think el realizes - like how she realized with brenner - that she doesn’t need mike to call her a superhero or hero. she is going back to hawkins because of her friends there - that’s what drives her. max is what drives her during that monologue.

there are distinct parallels between mike and brenner and hopper. maybe eleven realizes this as she came to her understanding of her relationship with brenner. she loves mike, but maybe she understands how now, and seriously just not to mention, she literally calls him a brother before he kisses her smh. like is it so hard to believe she comes to more than just one realization about her relationships than just brenner?

i think it’s also fair to note that even tho her and will didn’t leave off on the greatest terms either because of the squabble about her lying to mike, she is so relieved and happy to see him, too (and vice versa) but is it hard to believe that she maybe realizes he was right?

idk. i just think they are so great as friends but rly bring each other down as a couple and i want both to be happy and I’m sick of people accusing Byler shippers of not caring about el

[honeydewday]

Two Weeks: III

Summary: acceptance is denial, or maybe that wasn’t phrased right. Sometimes hiding, partying, and dreaming are forms of it.

Pairing: Peter Parker x Stark!Reader

Warnings: angst

<previou part next part>

"This is a mistake, let's just go home" Peter uttered nervously as he stared at the house in front of him. Turning to May, she began to give him an encouraging pep-talk however, it wasn't anything he hasn't heard before.

Ned had butted in to advise Peter to just "go to the party". With that anxious feeling in his stomach, he stepped out of the car, bidding May a good night, and watched as he was now stuck at this social gathering.

Peter knew why he was nervous. It was obvious for many reasons, you were here...and there was a possibility that you were mad at him. He didn't have enough fingers to count the reasons as of lately why he had disappointed you but, he just couldn't seem to face you. He wanted to hear your voice, god he missed it.

The anxious feeling only intensified when he spotted a familiar vintage car squished between the long line of cars that were parked next to the curb. He stooped forward a bit to only confirm his suspicions, 'STARK72',

You were definitely here.

"What're you looking at?" Ned questioned focusing on what his friend was looking at

"Um, there." Peter gestured to the car, "You wanted proof, I wasn't lying about Y/N being Mr. Stark's daughter."

"First off, wow," Ned gaped in awe wanting to get a closer look, but, Peter's hand blocked him.

"Dude, that could be anyone's car," Ned added

It's not, trust me." Peter sighed, "Just don't make it obvious that you know if she finds out she'll be pissed."

"She's already pissed," Ned responded as they turned back to head inside.

"I know, I don't know why I said no to her, ya know? Being Spider-Man is kinda dangerous, even Mr.-"

"Speaking of spider-man, do you have the suit?" Ned asked cutting him off.

Peter responded by showing his suit hidden underneath his flannel.

"I just don't know why you guys make it harder for yourselves. You like her, she likes you..." Ned pauses as his hand rests on the knob "

Peter wasn't going to deny it, ever since that spider bit him and he dressed up in that onesie, he's neglected you. Not only you but literally everything, going from a carefree kid to worrying about criminals robbing someone in the middle of the night was quite the drastic adjustment.

As Ned rambled about ways Spider-Man could maybe give him a fist bump or a handshake, they spot Michelle oddly making herself some toast.

"I can't believe you losers are here" She spoke up

"But, you're here too?" Ned answered confused

"Am I?" Michelle took a bite of her toast as she walked up to the two. "By the way, Y/N is here"

Peter's eyes widen as he felt his cheeks heat up. Wiping his hands against his pants to get rid of how clammy they were becoming, he looked around, "R-Really?"

"Yeah, but she's here to see your main attraction, your friend Spider-Man," Michelle said taking another bite of her toast and walking away

Liz came to greet the nerds only for a moment, hearing something break and needing to tend to the situation.

"You could've shot your shot, you could've used spidey!" Ned exclaimed

Peter shook his head, "No, Spider-Man is not a party trick, I'm just gonna be myself."

Ned shook his head in disappointment, "No one wants that"

Peter shared his feeling of disappointment and began walking away. That feeling was only further confirmed by Flash embarrassing him and Ned throughout the entire house.

Peter stormed through the house to get to the roof. As he began stripping, he watched as other kids danced, laughed, and drank. Ned stood there awkwardly awaiting his entrance. As he kept scanning, he spotted a figure that was all too familiar.

You.

You were looking back and forth, anxiously. Maybe you were needed to be on the lookout to avoid him? On a positive note, maybe you’re waiting for him? He would love to think that, but after that rejection, you had every right to avoid him. A lightbulb went off, maybe spidey could be his saving grace. Spider-Man could swoop in, say your his girl, and the rest would be history.

Shaking his head at the thought, he knew that he still couldn't face you. With or without the mask, it felt nearly impossibly.

He continued to watch your amusement at this gathering. Reaching down, he shuffled through his pants and pulled out his phone. He dialed the only other number he knew.

Still watching, Peter saw you shift as you pull out your phone. The glare showed how beautiful your features were. The sliver of hope making its way into Peter's ego was just enough to say that you would answer.

Your thumb hovered over the screen, silently praying it was the 'accept' button, but the longer he heard the ringing, that sliver turned microscopic.

Looking up to the sky, he shut his eyes and hoped for the best.

“Hey!”

Your voice. Your sweet sweet voice. Peter could feel his heart almost leaping out of his chest. Peter never doubted it for a minute, now it's his chance to make up for everything.

“H-hey! I-“

“This is Y/N, leave a message and I’ll get back to you.”

Peter huffed, a frown appearing on his face. He knows it's you. It's always going to be you. What was stopping him from it? Spider-Man? Your dad? School? The way he feels for you has no boundaries, and he wants to make that clear every step of the way.

He decided to leave his message.

Low and behold, what was happening inside the house was a different story.

You leaned patiently against a bookshelf, awaiting for Michelle’s return from god knows where. Not to mention waiting to see if the infamous Spider-Man would show up.

“Hey Y/N, how’re you enjoying the party?” Liz smiled warmly

“Great,” you smiled, “lovely house too.”

She thanked you, thinking she would leave you alone like a good hostess would, she continued the conversation.

“I’m surprised to see you here without Peter” she retorted

Choking on your drink, you gave her a questioning look.

“Are you okay?”

“We-we’re not together,” you said softly

“Really? I’m actually surprised” she responded

Keeping your mouth shut would probably have been the best option at this point but nervousness mixed with liquid courage aided in your decision to tell Liz what to expect.

“Peter really likes you,” you started “He wants to ask you to be his homecoming date…he has his heart set on it.”

Liz looked back at you, now sipping on her drink. “Maybe he’s lying, ya know?”

Raising your brow curiously at her she shrugged. Before you could ask any more questions, another huge crash had gotten her attention. She left you alone with only one question now…

You couldn’t be that oblivious….right?

Before becoming Spider-Man, you and Peter were inseparable. Then he got that damn bug bite and now he’s flinging all over the city, getting into trouble. You’d figure after helping him hone this new persona, he’d still make time for you.

I mean, he did owe it to you. He would’ve never met Tony Stark and gotten his suit if it weren’t for you.

“Hey,” Michelle spoke as she pulled you from your thoughts, “a few of the teammates wanna ditch, care to join?”

Looking past her you saw a few familiar faces from the decathlon, giving them a small wave.

“I’m gonna sit this one out,” you said shaking your head, however, Flash’s made it known that Spider-Man hadn’t shown up and Ned was the one left to take the blow.

“Actually, I’m gonna take Ned home,” you said as you parted with Michelle.

As people’s laughs roared around him, you gently pulled him to the side.

“Need a ride?” You asked as he nodded sadly

The two of you silently walked to your car, you leading. This is what you meant by Peter ditching everything all the time. Understating the work of a hero is important but when the hero fails to realize his mistakes, everything beneath him starts to crumble.

When you reached the car and got in before you could get a word out of your mouth about ignoring flash Ned spoke up

As you reached your car, you had mentally prepared a motivational speech just for Ned. He got in first then you followed, silence had overcome the small atmosphere and you knew it was time to give him some encouragement.

“You should just ignore him, Flash will get what’s coming-

“Peter told me everything,” he started “I can't believe I’m sitting in Tony stark’s car!” He exclaimed looking around touching normal car accessories around him.

Your mouth was left agape, “I-um- what?”

“Last night. Peter spilled everything. I know he’s Spider-Man because I was waiting for him for like three hours to help me finish our Death Star and that when I see him crawling on the ceiling.” He explained as he hovered his finger over an unmarked button.

“Ned, we’ll explode if you press that” you lied knowing fully well it was just to open the trunk.

“Today,” Ned continued as he retrieved himself back and buckled up, “I asked him a lot of stuff like does he lay eggs, can he control spiders, and how he got that upgraded suit.”

You turned the car on, putting it in drive, and glanced over at him as he explained.

“And, he said Mr. Stark gave it to him….but didn’t make it for him. His daughter did.” He ended slyly

You stared at the road in front of you.

“Sorry that was a lot for you-“

“It’s fine, it-it actually feels good to stop hiding it” you explained

“Peter also mentioned that you have powers?” He questioned

“You didn’t even give me a chance to catch my breath” you joked

Silence rose over the two of you again.

“Yes, I can see the future…at least that’s what I think it is” you explain

“Can you see my future? Like, am I gonna be a millionaire? What college am I going to? I really wanna go to MIT-“

“It doesn’t work like that, I see boring stuff like-like what hairstyle I’ll wear tomorrow or traffic down Broadway..”

Ned sat in silence, seemingly disappointed.

Looking over you you huffed, “I don’t get to chose what I see but I’ve predicted a lot of things like the avengers and, well, meeting Peter.”

“Was I in it?!?” He asked excitingly again

“Yes, and I definitely remember you” you fibbed

Ned continued to ask you about things that you saw, can you avoid the future and something about Thor being missing.

“Can you sign my limited edition of the mysteries of Tony Stark magazines I have? It’s worth a whole lot especially since nobody knows who you are but I do.” He requested and that was where you drew the line.

After dropping him off, you sped home. Walking in, the echoes of shoes fill your ears. Friday greeted you, as you threw your bag on the couch. Empty house, no parents around and that meant one thing. No interrogating on why you’re home late.

Making your way to your room, you felt the overbearing feeling of everything falling apart around you. You didn’t know what was the truth. You didn’t know if you were right to feel the way you did about Peter.

You crawled into bed, laying on your back. You just needed to breathe. Close your eyes and breathe. You started to countdown from 10.

9…8…7…6…

“Y/N, I am so so so sorry,” the rustling of your curtains and window opening caused your eyes to shoot open.

“What?” Asking quietly as you sat up cautiously

In the corner of your room, you saw the red and blue onesie. Breathing out a sigh of relief, he walked from the shadows to relieve his battered and bruised self.

“P-Peter, are you okay?” You ask climbing from your bed and rushing over to him.

“You were right, it was Liz’s dad.” He mumbled with disappointment.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you stepped back. “What are you talking about?”

“You were right.” He started as he gently took your hands, “Sorry will never be good enough and it’s not going to make up for our fights…putting you in harm’s way. You were right. You said you saw it in your dream and it happened.”

You swallowed, looking down as he traced patterns into your skin. You looked at the boy in front of you. Part of you knew that what you were seeing wasn’t happening just yet.

“I-I just couldn’t stop him at first,” Shaking his head, the moonlight revealing the tears that began streaming down his cheeks. "A whole building fell on top of me, but while I was stuck I realized something...I am spider-man, but I’m also a stupid kid in a suit who doesn’t know what he’s up against majority of the time. Literally pajamas. I’m sorry, I should’ve listened and I can’t take it back now and and-“

You stood silent, listening to his realization.

“I...Can you please talk to me? Was this about the ferry or-or the kiss?” His eyes pleaded with you

The ferry? The kiss?!?

Pulling away from his grip, the warmth of his hand still on yours, you stepped back.

I-Peter I don’t know what to say..” you whispered

He sniffled as more tears began cascading down his face, “I messed up. I couldn’t lose you in either accidents-I mean- I hope you don’t think the kiss was an accident because I meant it. I meant everything I said.”

You could feel the frustration in his voice. Breathing in deeply and taking a step back, you continued to listen to him.

"I should’ve never listened to Tony" Peter began pacing back and forth, his frustration becoming anger, "I fucked up when I kissed you, right? You don't feel the same way?" Stopping his pace, he looked at you, eyes red and full of disappointment. Not in you, but in himself.

Astonished couldn't even begin to describe how you felt. Nonetheless, you knew what was happening right in front of you hadn't happened yet. This was the future...well possibly one of them. You needed to stop him before you knew too much. Things start to get a little fuzzy.

“I need you to leave,” you barked “right now.”

Peter’s face dropped, you didn’t even have to look at him to see the heartbreak on it.

“Y/N, I-I, I’m so sorry,” he argued, however, that fuzzy feeling started creeping in.

“I know you have feelings for me and I know that we’re young but I’ve always loved you. I don’t think that feeling will go away.” You heard the sound of his voice begin to muffle.

“You fucked up and you need to leave. Now.” You stifle out, feeling the tears starting to form in your eyes. You watched as he climbed out the window and swung into the night.

Going back to bed, you lay in the same position as when you awoke and closed your eyes.

It’s just a dream. It’s just a dream. It’s just a dream.

You shut your eyes tight, waiting for this dream to end. You hadn’t finished your countdown.

5…4…3…2…1

What sounded like static began clearing up to reveal the sound of your alarm. Peaking through your eyelids, the early sunlight splashed upon your ceiling.

Sitting up, the window that Peter had entered was closed. Nobody had come in.

A dream.

A vision.

The future.

Reaching over and opening the draw to your nightstand, you pulled out your journal. Scribbling down everything that just happened, something strange was going on here.

—-

Rushing to make your way out the door, Happy bickering you over the phone, you were late to school once again.

As you got in the car, hanging up your phone, Happy still continued to nag.

“And don’t forget all the crap you have at the tower is being moved tonight.” He stated as he began focusing on the road.

“Wait, he sold the tower already?” You asked, “to who?”

“No clue but I’m in charge of making sure all of yours and Tony’s junk is moved to the upstate compound.” He explained

Finally, it clicked. This bird person that Peter had been trying to take down was Liz's dad who's trying to steal some type of tech.

“You wouldn’t happen to know if there was some alien tech?” Curiously asking

“There’s a lot of tech. When have the Avengers ever fought aliens?” He responded annoyingly

Pausing, you thought for a bit. As soon as you pulled into school, it clicked.

“What about from a while back? Ya know, the Chitauri?” You pushed further

Happy sighed as he stopped the car in front of the school. You couldn’t tell by the expression on his face if he was annoyed or agitated.

He nodded, “that is definitely being moved, the last one to go out actually.”

You smiled at him, getting out of the car to rush in.

_____

“So…I was in your dream?” Peter questioned, “what...what’s going to happen?”

“You just told me what had happened and I’m assuming something happened last night since you didn’t come back.” You shrugged

He nodded in response, “it’s from the Chitauri.”

“I think everything worked out in the end,” you added, ending on a positive note

“That’s it? Who’s behind all of this then? The guy with wings?”

You felt uneasy, how were you supposed to tell Peter that his future date’s father was the one causing chaos.

“Well…you said something along the lines of ‘Liz’s dad’ so.” You mumbled looking down

Silence had taken over the atmosphere, swallowing in anticipation, you slowly looked back up to his face.

He looked deep in thought, brows wrinkled, he opened his mouth to speak but shook his head.

“If this is about homecoming-“

“For Christ sake, I saw what I saw and I thought you should know.” You barked

“It doesn’t make any sense, Y/N.” He argues

Your annoyance began turning into anger. You knew this would happen; it always does. But after what you saw in Germany maybe he had a right not to believe you.

“The future isn’t suppose to make sense, it just happens.”

“I’m sorry I rejected you, I would’ve loved to go with you but-“

Hold up your hand to stop him, you shook your head, “save it, I don’t need your pity. I’m just trying to help you.”

“Liz is a good person, you can’t put the blame on her.” He mumbled

Your stomach twisted, if you could, you would’ve socked him right in his face.

“Liz is a kind, beautiful, intelligent person who shouldn’t have to be dragged down by her father’s actions.” Adding to his comment

He nodded in agreement, “But I have the suit,” stepping closer to you, “Maybe you could modify it and readjust some features, I’d be able to find him and take him down. Please Y/N”

Your stomach dropped. You hadn’t felt this feeling in a while, you never really had to worry about it since Peter saw you as so much more than your name, the money, the tech. You felt used. You could be thrown, replaced, forgotten at any minute.

“Peter, you’re my best friend,” you started feeling the tears form in your eyes, “I can’t hack into a multimillion dollar suit- I just can’t.”

“Your dad’s the one that made it, you said you helped him?”

You tried not to let your tears stream freely but you didn’t have a dam to block them.

“He put it for your protection, there’s a lot of shit in there you don’t know how to use-“

“Of course I know how to use it, I’m not dumb, just please help me with this.”

“I…is this a joke?” You questioned stepping back, “you…you finally got your suit and what? Ghat’s it? Now you only want me help when it’s about your suit?”

Peter had a sour expression, “you came to me first-“

“I came to you first because I don’t want you to die!” You cried

Silence had taken over your surroundings once more. The ringing of the bell was your saving grace that broke the tension. Kids began piling the hallways.

“Do whatever you want with the suit,” you faintly said

Walking passed him, you could feel his eyes staring you down. What Peter thought was an entirely different story;

Watching as you stormed off, he just couldn’t comprehend the seriousness of the situation. The only thing that did makes sense was hearing your voice. He listened. Listened to the sweet melody of your tone mixed with your alluring words.

He had stepped closer to bask in the scent of your perfume. Captivated by the beauty you were born with.

But alas, he was just trying to protect you. Just trying to take Tony’s advice. He wondered if you had listened to the voicemail he left you, obviously, the love he has for you continues to go unheard.

With your mind being in shambles, you checked your phone. Michelle had sent a text letting you know that she signed you guys up to bunk together for the decathlon trip. Nodding to yourself as you made your way to class. This was more than great. You’d be literally out of the state for a few days and nowhere near Peter. He wasn’t on the team anymore, it was going to be an amazing time with Michelle.

What could possibly go wrong?

[stutterfly]

Swipe Right 04 | Patch Notes | JJK (M)

Rating: M (Explicit 18+)

Pairings: Jungkook x Reader, brot7 x friendship

Genre: E2L, fluff, angst, humor, [eventual] smut, PersonalTrainer!Jungkook, fuckboy!Jungkook, Nerd!Jungkook, Nerd/IT!Reader

Word Count: 15.1K

Last time on SR03: You joined a gym to increase your confidence and things progressed the way you want with your tinder match. You ended up in an unlikely competition with your friends when you went new bar together, leading to some unexpected conversations and shenanigans.

CW & Other Tags: Drinking, anxiety/panic attack mentions, muscle tearing injury mention, fuckboy Jungkook, pining, flirting, pick-up lines, sexual tension, Joonie is still Y/N’s best boi, soft Jungkook

Series: Activate your SIMCard

Fic: Swipe Right (4/?- Ongoing)

Do not repost.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

When’s the last time you felt as good as you do right now? Jungkook has pretty much stopped bothering you since that night at Seesaw, your date with Jason went well, and you’ve been sticking to your early morning workouts. You definitely don’t push yourself as much as trainer Hwasa, and you know you should really take advantage of the free trial, but it was overwhelming to take in so much at once and the session made you sore all over for days.

At least your stamina seems to be improving and you’ve discovered post-workout endorphins are real. Tonight is your second date with Jason, a date you’ve uncharacteristically elected to host at your apartment. You can place some blame on those endorphins for your boldness, with pining and disappointment composing the rest of it.

While your first date ended without a kiss, there was enough flirting to keep you hopeful. Neither of you were brave enough to do anything about it then, but you’ve mentally coached yourself into pretending like you have an unbreakable spine with nerves of steel. Meeting him only solidified your attraction, and you’ve resolved to take the lead, even though you feel like you have no idea what you’re doing.

It’s not like you often make the first move, but your confidence in him to do so has waned. You’ve been talking and playing games together online for months without any physical touch. Despite how he’s said he likes you and wants to see you again, you’d still be waiting if you didn’t suggest today.

You’re determined to show him what he’s missing by being a recluse. That’s why you’ve picked out the sluttiest clothes and the strappiest heels you own, decorated your face with expensive makeup, and even styled your hair instead of just letting it do whatever it wants for the day. You check yourself out in the full-length mirror on your bedroom door for the millionth time and pull down on the hem of your dress like it will somehow magically grow longer.

You don’t need the heels; no part of the night calls for them. You’re going to be sitting on the couch with him. If you’re lucky you’ll even move it to the bedroom you spent so much time cleaning. But they’re cute and they make you feel sexy, so you’re going to keep them on until he’s peeling you out of your dress.

Nerves bubble in your stomach, but you have to pretend like they’re not there or you’ll fixate on how hard you’re trying to be confident and cool. You’ll fall apart when it’s obvious to Jason how hard you’re pretending to be everything you aren’t. Checking your phone doesn’t help; it’s almost time.

Taking a deep breath, you pace through the confines of your apartment as you wait, and answer group texts from Jennie and Namjoon. You offer up a selfie, hoping any compliments will build your confidence enough to stave off the anxiety in your gut. A few devil emojis later, some keysmashing, and more than a couple hamfisted compliments from Namjoon, your ego is adequately inflated but you can always use more hyping. Maybe you should send it to Jimin to fish for more compliments? He’d indulge you for sure.

Instead you flop on the couch and open Tinder. According to Jennie, Jason is stringing you along; it’s been months, but you hate to admit that she has a point. So you don’t. She’s been telling you for a while now that she thinks you should pursue other suitors. While you object to her assumptions, she has more experience with this kind of stuff. It’s not exactly something you want to believe, not when you’ve put in so much effort for literal months.

You want to believe in Jason being awkward and dorky and that’s why it’s taken so long for the two of you to hook up. He’s shy and super introverted, but so are you. So why are you the only one trying to make things happen? You want to believe, but at this point you’re uncertain enough to heed Jennie’s advice and keep swiping any time you find yourself in a situation where you’re waiting on him. Like now.

You have your reservations about swiping while you wait for your date to begin, but you can practically hear Jennie cheering you on. He’s late anyway, and it will keep you busy until he arrives. You open the discovery tab and swipe left on a couple incomplete profiles. Most of the guys on here don’t put in any effort. How are you supposed to want to give any of them a chance when you don’t even get a tiny snapshot of who they are?

When you pass on yet another fish pic profile, a blue frame appears around the next guy in line. It takes a moment for your brain to register the name along with the duck-faced photo as someone familiar.

[Jungkook said: Your legs remind me of oreos 🥴 wanna know why?]

How fucking dare he? You match with the intent to ream him out and leave.

You: I told you not to fucking find me on here

It takes only a few seconds before you see the dots move on his end, like he was waiting for the moment you would answer, and it keeps you tethered to the conversation.

Jungkook: Princess!! I couldn’t help myself how are you

Jungkook: Surprised you didn’t block me

You: Don’t worry I’m gonna

Jungkook: it’s bc you wanna know huh

You: ???

Jungkook: Your legs

Jungkook: Like oreos

Jungkook: I wanna split them n lick the cream from the center 😜

Electricity rumbles in your gut, carrying heat and a surge of excitement to your cunt that threatens to flood your panties. You swallow hard and squeeze your thighs together as you stare at the screen. Embarrassed by the response his antics elicit, you scramble to formulate a coherent thought.

You: I wish I could unread 🤢

Jungkook: Aw but that’s one of my favorites

Jungkook: Just like you 😘

You: 🙄

You: I hate you so much

Jungkook: So much that you matched with me?

You stare at the message like a clever response will come to you and when it doesn’t you bite your lip. He’s got a point. Haven’t you learned your lesson not to encourage him? Your eyes scan the top of your phone for any notifications from Jason. Nothing. At least this is keeping you distracted. That’s what you tell yourself.

Jungkook: You’re still here which means 👀

You: It means I’m tired

Jungkook: Of?

You pause for a moment. Namjoon and Jennie can’t know how anxious you are about Jason. It’s the guy’s last strike with them and he hasn’t even met them yet. Jungkook, an impartial third party, might be able to lend an ear. As much as you don’t care what he thinks, you need an outlet for the anxiety in your chest. You start to draft a word-vomit. Jason has been so hesitant to see you in person again and now he’s late. Maybe if you just put it out there to someone you’ll feel better.

Jungkook: If you need to sleep how about a massage?

Jungkook: I’m good with my fingers 🥴

Stupid. In what universe could you confide in Jungkook? Deleting your word-vomit before you can send it, you start to type something else, but your thumb accidentally taps enter at the exact wrong moment.

You: You know what? I want you

FUCK. Goddamn you, sausage fingers.

You scramble to rewrite the sentence but Jungkook is quicker. He has to know it was an accident, but you’re still fucking mortified.

Jungkook: 😈

Jungkook: My place

Jungkook: Ten minutes

You: *to stay off my profile

Jungkook: 👉👌?

You: YOU KNOW I DIDN’T MEAN THAT

You: 🤢🤢🤢

Jungkook: 😩

Jungkook: Now you’re just playing games with me princess

Jungkook: Can’t say I mind just fuck me up 🥴

You: Don’t you have a princess to fuck in another castle? Maybe she can stroke your tiny ego

Jungkook: Ouch felt that from here

He goes quiet and you close the conversation out. Setting the phone down on the cushion beside you lasts all of two seconds. When your phone buzzes twice, you know better than to answer, yet you feel compelled to look.

Jungkook: Hey quick question

Jungkook: Is this the most you’ve used the app to talk with someone you like? 👻

Just like that you unmatch with him and take a moment to seethe. Distraction or no, he’s not worth the mental energy. He always seems to draw you in like a pretty little thirst trap and drain you of your sanity. Not engaging is the safest option so why do you always end up doing so? Maybe it’s that shitty little part of you that gets excited any time he shows you attention.

There’s a gullible girl within you; she sets your pulse on fire when he feigns even the slightest interest, fills your head with wind when he brushes against you, and floods your eyes with tears when he walks away. Still, she wants him to look at you, even if it means he’s really looking through you. You hate her. Why can’t she learn that you deserve better?

You check the time again and wince. Jason is really late now. Not even a text. Or a phone call. Maybe it’s traffic?

Try to relax. Nothing bad is going to happen. You’re going to have fun tonight.

You start up a game to take your mind off the options available to explain his absence. When you’re invested in a game you often lose track of time, but tonight you’re hyper-aware of every minute that passes. You bite at your freshly painted nails during loading screens, chipping the red from their edges. Sounding casual is difficult when you’re worried, but you attempt it anyway via text. It’s ten more agonizing minutes of waiting before your phone buzzes with an answer.

The controller drops to your lap and immediately tears begin to sprinkle your thighs with the manifestation of your heartache.

He forgot.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

An earthy scent fills Namjoon’s apartment as he carefully transfers the last of his plants to a bigger pot, filling in the edges of its roots with fresh soil and patting the edges down with care. His plants have needed this, maybe even more than he needs the mini hangout that will soon follow. The kitchen table is covered in dirt, but at least he’s almost done.

It’s not his fault Jungkook showed up earlier than expected. At least he’s quiet now. It’s been a while, but he’s finally stopped asking about how much longer it will take, so he must either be invested in the show he put on or asleep on the couch.

“Almost done,” Namjoon loudly announces. “Can you text Tae?”

“Kay.” Jungkook yawns as he stands and heads towards the bathroom. “Jin was already cooking when I left so it should be ready soon.”

“Good. I’m hungry,” Namjoon says, carefully transporting the plant to the desk in his bedroom.

As he’s on his way to clean up the mess on the table there’s a soft rapid knock at the front door. The moment he opens it and finds you standing before him, he knows something is wrong. Even the ratty hoodie covering your shoulders can’t hide the effort you’ve obviously put into your appearance tonight. While your makeup seems to have fared rather well, your eyes are red and your cheeks are puffy. His mind automatically assumes the worst about your second date and his jaw tightens.

“What happened? Did he hurt you?”

“He never showed.” You throw your arms around him and openly sob.

“Oh, Y/N…” His arms are around you in an instant, hugging you close while keeping his dirty fingers at bay.

You press your cheek against his chest, letting the tears fall freely. “I’m sorry. I know you probably have plans tonight, but I wanted to stop here—” You choke out a loud sob and wipe your nose with your sleeve as you look down at the floor. “I didn’t want to drive upset but you weren’t answering and I just—”

“Shit. Exam today. I left it on silent.” He pats his pocket to make sure it’s still there, wiping as much dirt as he can on his jeans before placing his hands on your shoulders. “Hey, it’s okay. Deep breaths.”

Jungkook emerges from the bathroom quietly with a furrowed brow and pursed lips. Did he hear your voice or is it his imagination? Unsure if you’re some wishful remnant of earlier texts, he peeks around the corner.

Heels: black, strappy heels with a velvety smooth red undersole. Has he ever seen you in heels? If he has, it’s never been something as flashy as these. His gaze travels up the smooth, exposed skin of your legs until it hits the hem of a skirt. The dark fabric seems a little short; it clings to your thighs, riding up as you embrace his friend. It’s hard not to notice how well it accents the curve of your hips and more importantly: your ass. He’s definitely never seen you in something so revealing, not even on nights where you’ve joined them for dancing.

He pauses for a fraction of a second, eyes trained on the swell of your ass before moving up to find the disappointing sight of your favorite hoodie barring much else from view. Namjoon’s arms outline your shape, but the places his hands rest are far too respectable to glean much else other than simple blueprints.

With his dick leading his steps, Jungkook opens his mouth to announce his presence with a joke. He means to selfishly steal a glimpse of your entire ensemble with some snarky comment but you choke out a sob and his stomach lurches to form a whirlpool of apprehension. His mouth remains open, but his words are swallowed back into the dark swirling pit that now wrenches his gut in circles.

Namjoon looks up just in time to read the confusion and shock on his features. He shakes his head and cups yours against his chest, wordlessly signaling Jungkook to keep quiet.

“Is there anything I can do? Do you wanna talk about it?” Namjoon asks, hoping you don’t see the man behind you slowly backing away like he’s just approached a rabid animal.

You’re sobbing. Why are you sobbing? What happened? Was it what he said before you unmatched? Jungkook tiptoes back into the kitchen without a word. He leans against the counter and shoves his hands in his coat pockets, trying to piece everything together. Did he cause this?

You screw your eyes shut to try to keep the tears inside. It’s no use. They always seem to find a way out. “He didn’t show up and when I texted him, he… he said he forgot."

“What?"

“I thought it would be good after the arcade date, you know? Like, good chemistry. He’s weird. I like him! He seemed interested and we made these plans and he just—” you choke out another loud sob. “God. Am I really so fucking forgettable?”

You wanted your friends to be wrong so badly that you ignored the fact that it’s been like pulling teeth trying to get Jason to meet up again. For him to forget completely is like a kick to the face that leaves all the teeth intact, maybe a little bloody, but stubbornly intact.

“Y/N, no. It’s not your fault. You deserve better than this fucking guy.”

Jungkook swallows hard. This definitely doesn’t feel like a conversation he should be hearing, but it’s loud enough to carry through the entire apartment. Kitchen, bedroom, or bathroom: his options are limited, but he knows there’s nowhere to go to pretend like he can’t hear it. It’s not like he can just walk out the front door now.

“Do I? It’s seems like a fucking pattern, Joon. I fall for people so easily and they always make me feel like an idiot for trying. Donghyun. Seojun. Jason. Jungkook… It doesn’t matter. No one fucking wants me.”

Jungkook tenses. He may not know all the names on your list, but his is among them all the same. Has he really hurt you so much?

“Hey… Don’t think like that,” Namjoon says, his voice soft as he rubs your back. “You know your worth, and it’s not measured by how well someone else can see it.”

Every time you think you’re done crying, fresh tears begin to roll down your cheeks. “I’m tired, Joonie.”

“I know. I’m sorry. We'll get you home."

As you step back to look at him your ankle rolls, and you begin to fall. Hearing the scuffle, Jungkook winces and peeks around the corner. Namjoon has a good enough grip to stop you from fully tumbling to the floor, but you’re definitely not stable by any means.

Although you now face Jungkook, you’re too distracted by your ankle to notice the extra pair of eyes on you. He allows himself to stupidly linger within your line of sight, raking his gaze across your form to take in the details of your attire, right down to your choice of earrings. Even with a red nose and puffy, smudged eyes, the time you’ve spent on your appearance remains evident.

You did all that for some guy who didn’t even show? If that’s how you dress for your dates then his innocent perception of you is completely wrong. What kind of moron would pass up the opportunity to peel you out of that dress and dive into your cunt? You look incredible. What the fuck.

"God. Shit. Fuck! Fucking stupid heels!” You huff out your exasperation and let a small pitiful laugh pass your lips as you right your stance with Namjoon’s help. “You know, I spent hours getting ready and now I just look stupid. I feel stupid.”

“You don’t. You’re not,” Namjoon insists, his palm squeezing your shoulder.

“Namjoon, I shaved my entire body. Do you know how long that took?”

Jungkook forces himself to withdraw into the kitchen. If you see him now you might murder him. He purses his lips into a thin line and tightens his grip around his arms. In an instant he imagines hiking your dress above your hips and parting your legs so he might brush his cheek against the smooth expanse of your thigh all the way to your core. Are your panties as slutty as your dress? Are they cute? Lacy? Plain?

“Geeksquad…” Namjoon sighs loudly. “I really don’t need to know— Hold up. Wasn’t this the second date?”

“Are you slutshaming me?” The tired laugh that follows sounds more like you, but it still hurts his heart. “I’m stepping up my game.”

“Nah. You do you,” he says, a soft smile on his lips that’s obviously full of pity. “You want to stay and get some food? I think I have some sweats you can change into.”

Tires screech in Jungkook’s mind. Is he going to be trapped here for the night? Without dinner? What kind of karmic torture is the universe putting him through?

“No, I’m sorry,” you sniffle, wiping your face with the sleeves of your sweater. “Jennie wants me to come over but I—I didn’t think I could make it with having a full meltdown. You were on the way.”

“No need to apologize.” He pulls you into another tight hug. “Do you want me to walk you back to your car?”

“No, no it’s fine. I’m right in front. Thanks, Joonie.” Your phone begins to buzz in your hoodie pocket. You pull back and wave it at him, already on your way to the door. “It’s like she knew. I’ll talk to her on the way. Thank you for listening to me cry for the millionth time.”

“Always. Text me when you get there, okay?”

“Will do, mom,” you tease with a soft laugh.

“Zip up your hoodie.”

You grimace at him with narrowed eyes but heed his advice on your way out. You also pull your skirt down as far down your thighs as it will reach. Men are gross and you trust virtually none of them.

Jungkook waits until he hears the click of the lock on the door to breathe a loud sigh of relief. Namjoon rubs the back of his neck and stares at the door. He worries about you.

“Yikes. That Jason guy is a dick huh?”

Namjoon swivels on his heels and rounds on his friend. “Like you were so much better to her?”

Jungkook casts his gaze to the floor. “I didn’t stand her up.”

Even he knows that argument is flimsy.

“Guk.”

“It was always just a joke.”

“It’s not though. She really liked you, man. I asked you not to mess with her.”

Memories have warped Jungkook into a jaded man: untrusting although not uncaring. Guilt is the only thing churning in his stomach as he thinks of you. He never expected to genuinely hurt you. Somehow things twisted into a gnarled mess that never really felt like more than a playful game of tug-of-war. But these kinds of games only work when the people involved know that they’re playing. It’s shitty when one pulls another into the mud when they’ve never agreed to participate.

Faced with the reality of how you consider him now, it dawns on him that he’s dragged you into the mud face-first without even the slightest resistance. You’ve stood up and you’ve even yanked the rope in retaliation, but you never should’ve been in the mud in the first place. Regardless of his own emotional ineptitude, he knows you never deserved that humiliation. No one does. The weight of his actions sits heavy in his gut.

Still he tries to justify himself. “All I do now is make pass after pass and she’s the one who turns me down.”

“You said it earlier yourself,” Namjoon sneers, irritated by his friend’s immaturity. “It’s always a joke. You’re never serious and she knows it. Look, you don’t have to like her back. She’s my friend and so are you. Just don’t lead her on and stop with the mind games. Be honest with her. The least you can do is apologize for being a dick.”

“That’s— I feel like… I don’t know how.”

Jungkook can’t bring himself to tell him of your conversation earlier tonight. It just adds to the guilt piling on his conscience. Namjoon used his own words against him and the worst part is it makes sense. It’s so much easier when it’s a stranger at a bar or a random encounter at a club, but you’re neither of those things. He lumped you into that category all the same.

Namjoon clicks his tongue and puts an arm around Jungkook’s back. “Starting with ‘I’m sorry’ can go a long way. She’s a good person and I know you guys can get along. Things were going well until you made that bet, right?”

Jungkook opens his mouth to speak and then closes it. “Mmm.”

“Not every girl is a Jiseo, Jungkook.”

“Yeah.”

“I think…” Namjoon sighs and shakes his head. “I don’t know. Can you try to just... tone it down? Maybe try to patch things up?”

“Okay.” Jungkook’s brow furrows and he chews his lip as he mulls over Namjoon’s words. He reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out his keys. “You ready?”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Your head dips forward as your fingers glide across the keys. It's hard to concentrate on your task when you're this distracted by your own thoughts. You stare at the monitor with furrowed brows. Namjoon grabs the back of your chair and leans forward to tower over you.

"Went that well, huh? Did he blow the second chance he didn’t deserve?"

The motion jerks you backwards and you grip the armrests of the chair to steady yourself. Despite your best attempt to curb the irritation in your expression, your frustration remains apparent. You sit back and tilt your head up to look at him, trying to think of something to say, some excuse to not reinforce the "told you so" waiting in your future, not after you showed up at his apartment sounding like a dying whale a few days before. When no ideas come to your immediate aid, you click your tongue and let out a heavy sigh as you turn your attention back to the screen.

"Geeksquad," he presses. "Talk to me."

You exhale through your nose and briefly purse your lips before obliging his plea. The words are quick and quiet so you don't run the risk of bawling your eyes out again. "He canceled.”

Namjoon steps back and the pressure on your seat is gone. He places a large palm on your shoulder. "I'm sorry. Do you want to talk about it?"

Despite wanting to give the opposite answer, you shake your head. You don't trust yourself to speak, but you'd like to tell him. He's clever and you know he'll likely find a way to get it out of you with minimal effort anyway. Still, you don’t think you can manage the words without crying like a baby and you don’t want to do that when the morning has only just begun. Silence falls between the two of you as he gives you time to decide if you want to open up.

After a moment of tapping away you finally give in. You know you’ll feel better after you cry.

"He said he had to stay behind and help do clean-up for the party he was at. And that’s nice and all, but we had plans. I feel crazy. I should be glad that he’s so kind, right? Like that shows he’s a good person, right?” Your voice has cracked but it hasn’t quite broken.

He sighs and flops in the chair on the other side of his desk. “Y/N… I think you’re asking me for answers you already know.”

“But tell me anyway,” you press, tears welling in your eyes. “Our first date went so well. So why-y-” Your voice breaks.

“Hey.” He reaches across the desk and brushes his fingers against your arm. “I know you want me to help you make excuses for him... But you deserve someone who values your time. Clearly he’s just looking to waste it.”

“But—”

“Y/N, you don’t need someone like that. If this is what he’s like before you’re even together, then what kind of effort is he really going to put into a potential relationship? Not enough. There are so many people out there, people that would trip over themselves just to have the chance to be with you. I know you don’t want to hear it, but I think it’s a mistake that you even gave him another shot. He blew it. Twice. Delete his number. Forget him.”

“I know,” you croak. Tears fall from your eyes and you quickly swipe them away, focusing on the task at hand.

Namjoon is right and you know it, but you’re kind of irritated about it. You know it’s not really him you’re mad at, but Namjoon is a good enough placeholder while you try to sort through your hurt feelings.

You muster your most monotone voice as you stand. “I updated your drivers and deleted any cached files that might have been causing issues. Is that all?”

“Don’t be mad at me,” he pleads, rising to block your path as you step towards the door. “You have a big heart and I hate seeing it stepped on.”

In a matter of seconds you melt into his embrace and bury your face into his shirt. “I hate how fast I like people.”

“I know.” He pets the back of your head softly and squishes you against his chest. “It’s gonna be okay. How about udon later? My treat?”

“With beef?” you ask with a sniffle.

“With beef,” he agrees.

“Gyoza?”

“Mhm.”

“And takoyaki?”

“...You’re pushing it.”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

You slide the appetizer tray across the table towards Namjoon. “Here.”

He shovels a dumping into his mouth right before he speaks. “I could eat this every day for the rest of my life.”

“Could you afford it though?” you tease, taking a sip from the bottle of saké and crinkling your nose at it before passing it to him.

“Not if you’re joining me,” he snorts. “You’re supposed to pour it.”

“No, thanks.” You push the tiny glass full of liquid back towards him.

"Wow. Are you guys on a date?"

You know the source of the voice before you even crane your neck to see Jungkook.

"Pfft." Namjoon waves the question off with a deep laugh.

Despite finding the scenario of ever dating Namjoon absolutely absurd, you can’t help but feel a little insulted by the volume of his laughter. Namjoon’s hangout night was supposed to take your mind off of how unwanted Jason made you feel. Instead, the pit of insecurity within your stomach grows into a thick, tangled brush of hostility. Is being seen with you really so laughable?

“Why would we be?” you snap, turning your attention back to your bowl.

Heat settles in your face and you purse your lips, not daring to look at either of them. You try to wrangle some noodles to shovel in your mouth before you can say something stupid. Their eyes are on you. Jungkook is definitely confused but not alarmed by your hostility. It’s something he’s grown accustomed to. But Namjoon knows when he hurts your feelings, every time, and it’s easy enough to disarm your irritability.

“She’s way too good for a mess like me,” Namjoon says with a light laugh.

“Why are you here?” you ask, tone already softer than before.

"Post-work snackie," he answers, all too cheery for your sour mood. “Came for the noods. Mind if I join?”

He looks to the rosy-cheeked Namjoon for his answer, as you set your hoodie and purse down in the space beside you to give him yours. Namjoon betrays you by scooting over to make room on his side of the booth. You’d mentioned to him before that you’d eventually like to fix things with Jungkook, to somehow make steps for peace. But you only have so much mental energy left to give today.

“Not tonight, Jungkook,” you plead with a sigh.

The frustration in that puff of breath is enough to make Jungkook hesitate. He blinks a few times, wide-eyed. “What?”

“I just… can’t handle your bullshit tonight.”

Jungkook tries to break the uncomfortable tension with a grin. “No bullshit tonight. Promise.”

“No.” Your answer is firm and somehow so fragile that it makes both men worry their brows in the same fashion. “Please, just go away.”

He shoves his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket and takes a few steps back. He doesn’t know what to make of your demeanor, but he can put enough together to know the basics. You’re upset, maybe not at him for once. However unlikely, that’d be a blessing. Maybe you’re still upset about that guy that stood you up a few days ago. If that’s the case, he probably shouldn’t stick around and risk letting on how much he knows about that.

He tongues the side of his cheek and nods, forcing a smile to his face. “Alright. I’ll just order it to go. Planned on that anyway. Catch you later.”

Guilt wracks your nerves as he walks away. The moment you look back at Namjoon, you’re faced with a wall of disappointment that threatens to topple the scale of decision-making in Jungkook’s favor.

“You’re judging me for that,” you mumble. The noodles between your chopsticks slip back into the broth.

“Little bit,” Namjoon admits, watching his friend sulk over to the entrance waitstaff. “You know he told me he’s trying to be nicer to you.”

“What? When?”

“The other day. We hung out.”

He keeps his answers short and ambiguous, hoping your curiosity has been piqued. Maybe this is the golden opportunity he’s been hoping for to patch your friendship.

“Was this before or after he harassed me on Tinder?”

Namjoon’s heart sinks into his butt. Of course Jungkook would make reconciliation harder than it needs to be. “When did he do that?”

“That night I showed up at your apartment like a big crybaby.”

“I went over his place for dinner after you left. Jin wanted to try a new recipe out on us.” That seems to at least make you pause.

“You guys talked about me?”

“Yup.” He goes back to chewing his food, knowing he’s got you hooked.

Your incredulous stare does nothing to pull information past his lips. “Joonie. What did you say about me? What did he say?”

“Mmm?” He slurps up a long noodle. “A lot of things. But they’re not really my words to tell.”

“No one likes clickbait, Joon.”

“Look, all I’m saying is that he told me that he wants to fix things. If you want specifics, maybe we can invite him to come eat with us. It might be easier for the both of you to talk about it over good food.”

You sigh, seriously considering his words even as you shake your head. “Joon, I’m already emotionally compromised. I really don’t want to cry in front of Jungkook tonight.”

“Why would you cry? This is a night for good things only. Namjoon-approved and protected. You don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to... I just thought it might be nice to make some good memories with good friends.”

You roll your eyes but hold your pinky out for him. “Fine. But this is Joonie-Y/N time. You’re cutting into that allotted time slot, you know that right?”

Namjoon rests his elbow on the table, preparing to pinky swear to whatever you’re about to suggest. “Conditions?”

“He sits next to you, he doesn’t make fun of me if I cry, and…. he doesn’t get to talk.”

“Y/N.”

“Fiiiiine. He can talk. But he better be as nice as you say he’s trying to be.”

“We allowed to talk about Jason?”

“If it comes up…” you sigh. “You know, if he’s mean to me and I cry then you have to deal with it.”

He clasps his long pinky around yours. “Deal. But with how all that just went down, you gotta go tell him to come back. He won’t believe me if I do it.”

“Don’t let him be mean to me,” you plead, tightening your grip on his pinky and locking eyes with him. “Good vibes only.”

“He won’t be mean. Good vibes only.” Namjoon nods with a soft smile. “He really is a good person where it counts, Y/N.”

You push your things aside and force yourself to find Jungkook. He’s leaning against a wall near the entrance, scrolling through his phone while he waits for his order. You quietly request to your waitress that you’d like his food brought to your table. She’s nice enough about it, but your stomach churns regardless. It’s the anxiety.

You gingerly poke a finger against his shoulder as you approach. “Um. Hey.”

He seems startled at first, but smiles when he realizes it’s you. “Hmm?”

You take a deep quiet inhale, trying your best not to get lost in the butterflies his charming smile conjures in your gut. You try to tell yourself it’s anxiety and nothing more. Apologies are hard and scary. That’s all.

“I’m… sorry for being rude. I’ve had a rough week but I shouldn’t take it out on you. Come eat with us, please. Namjoon’s buying anyway.”

His eyes seem to light up with surprise and a warm smile deepens the creases around his eyes and mouth. The hope that these feelings of attraction would evaporate with time is a flame swiftly snuffed out and replaced with a burning heartache that deems denial useless. Even now, pangs of infatuation lurk below your feelings of disdain, breaking the tension of its surface with each beat of your heart.

“It’s okay,” he reassures you. “I shouldn’t have invited myself when I saw you guys. I should really get home and shower anyway.”

He looks so clean that you’d assumed he’d already showered. It’s not like you can smell him from where you stand. Maybe he’s lying, but at least you get the sense it’s coming from a place of politeness.

“Jungkook, I want you to come eat with us. Besides Namjoon wants someone to drink saké with him and I cannot keep doing it.”

“I see.” He offers a small laugh and rubs the back of his neck. “Are you sure? You seemed pretty against it before. What changed?”

“Namjoon told me you’re trying to be less of an asshole to me.”

“Did he?” he licks his lips and tries to hide his pleased smile. “I’m surprised you believe him.”

“He also promised me I could punch you in the dick if you make me cry,” you lie, completely stone-faced.

If he knows that’s a falsified statement, he doesn’t say anything. He looks past your shoulder to quirk a brow at Namjoon, who appears to be furiously texting at the table. Jungkook’s phone buzzes a few times against his palm and he’s fairly sure he already knows who it is.

“Come on. I already asked them to bring your food to the table.”

He reads Namjoon’s messages as he trails behind you.

NAMJOON: If you seriously want to apologize stick around, make her laugh, just listen when you need to

JUNGKOOK: Don’t worry

JUNGKOOK: I got u

Before Namjoon can send a text saying that Jungkook's response has the opposite effect, you’re peeking across the table, trying to get a glance at the screen.

“Who’s that?” you wonder. Namjoon’s not usually one to be so secretive with his texts.

“Hmm?” he raises his eyebrows at you and pours you a shot. “Stupid. Don’t worry about it.”

“Ha. Haha. Ha.” You gesture at your face. “You say to the girl with anxiety.”

Crinkling your nose at the glass he offers, you slide it across to Jungkook as he settles in next to Namjoon. “Here. I’m done drinking that stuff tonight.”

He regards it with a quirked brow. Something about your demeanor really has changed, but looking between you and Namjoon does nothing to answer the question of what that may be.

“Okay, so on reddit this guy was reaching. He’s going on about the symbolism in the red scarf—”

Your eyes gloss over the moment he mentions reddit. Is there anything you care less about than Joon’s favorite modern literary discussion threads?

“Got it. Not worrying about it,” you interrupt, bringing your bowl to your lips to slurp some of the broth.

Jungkook hides his smirk by throwing his head back to drink his shot. Namjoon is a genius. It might be scary if he ever decided to use his intellect for nefarious purposes. Lucky for the universe he uses it to protect others, like a real superhero would.

As the three of you dine together, you’re surprised to find that Jungkook isn’t being as annoying as he usually is. In fact, it seems the more he drinks outside of any competitive setting, the more affable he becomes. Maybe there’s something to Namjoon’s clickbaity words. He’s almost the person you remember meeting before the Halloween Party, maybe even more pleasant.

You’re grateful when the two of them start telling embarrassing stories so you can listen and laugh at the way they slur their words and interrupt each other. Laughter makes your heart feel light and full, and brave enough to take the last step to prove to yourself you’re done chasing Jason. As the two men fight over the last piece of gyoza and distract themselves over dessert, you quietly decide to clear your text messages from Jason. Your finger hovers over the delete icon for a second before purging his contact information from your device entirely.

It’s freeing to not have to worry about what you should send him. It’s frustrating to have tried so hard for so long and have nothing to show for it, but at least there will be no conversation history to pick apart anymore. It should feel perfect. That will definitely show him, right? You don’t have to reflect for more than a couple seconds to reinforce the memory of how little he actually reached out on his own.

He still has your number. The only time he ever called was on your first date. He never texted you unless you spoke first. He probably won’t even notice you’re gone. He’s probably relieved he won’t have to answer you anymore. He probably thinks you’re desperate for trying for so long. You don’t realize how well you wear your anxiety.

When you look up Jungkook is watching you while he chews with his mouth wide open. “Hey, why do-” He hiccups and swallows. “Why do you look so sad? You should have some ice cream.”

He scans the table for something to offer you, but he can’t seem to find what he’s looking for in his drunken stupor. After a few seconds his eyes finally land on his own plate where the other half of his red-bean cake sits.

“Do you want my taiyaki?” He holds the tail end of the fish-shaped cake out to you. “It’s really good!”

You can’t help but laugh at the unexpected sweet absurdity of the night. “Jungkook, I don’t want your half-eaten cake.”

He frowns and looks at the pastry. “Is it because I bit it? I’ll break off that part for you if you don’t want your mouth to touch that.”

Although Jungkook definitely is more drunk than Namjoon right now, the older man can’t help but be amazed by how well this is going. He loads up on green tea ice cream and digs his spoon in it. He shouldn’t have been so worried. Jungkook can put away the act when he wants to, especially once alcohol is involved and there’s nothing to prove. You guys are actually getting along. What a relief.

“No, really it’s okay.” You laugh.

Jungkook is already breaking the pastry apart in his hand, watching as it crumbles to pieces on his plate. He blinks a couple times and closes his mouth in a frown.

“I thought that would work.” He sounds utterly defeated.

The waitress walks over just in time to watch Namjoon stick a heaping spoonful of wasabi in his mouth. You're too busy laughing at Jungkook's forlorn expression to notice the way Namjoon's eyes water. His eyes drop to the ice cream he thought he shoveled into his mouth. Right next to the pristine, untouched scoop of green tea ice cream, he finds his spoon resting in the hunk of wasabi adjacent to it. He should really pay attention more. He pushes against Jungkook's side and motions that he needs to get up. The younger man spares a glance his way but Namjoon waves him off while mumbling something about the bathroom.

The waitress tries to keep her composure and looks between the pair of you. "How is everything?"

"Great! Could you please bring us some water?" you ask in your sweetest voice, realizing the two men with you should at least try to start sobering up.

You expected to have Namjoon crashing on your couch on a Friday night, or at least be dropping him off down the hall at Hobi’s place. Jungkook was not part of the plan, but you can’t exactly let him drive home inebriated. You know he’s not your responsibility but you’d feel guilty making him call for a ride home when you’re perfectly capable.

Although you hate to admit it, you’ve had fun tonight. If you’re being honest with yourself you’d like to see what he’s like without Namjoon nearby to police his moves. He’s been nice enough, but you want to know for sure this isn’t an act. You want to ask him if he’s made another bet, or playing some game since he hasn’t hit on you all night. Before you can get your line of questions in order, Jungkook turns to the server with large, pleading eyes.

"Oh! Can you bring some more dessert, please?"

He may be a grown ass man capable of charming the pants off of women everywhere, but right now he is little more than a child begging for seconds. Regardless of everything he's done, your heart softens, endeared and embarrassed by his drunken request to your server.

The waitress nods. "Sure, what would you like?"

His eyes fall to you for an answer. "What do you like?"

You blink at him. "Me? I thought this was for you."

He nods. "Mm. We can split it."

"Um, how about... tempura?"

"Banana?"

Jungkook’s voice is full of anticipation and his upturned eyebrows seem to bargain for agreement. It’s so hard to believe this is the same man who has been so cold to you for so long when he seems so open and warm now. You remind yourself it’s probably the alcohol. It’s probably some secret promise to Namjoon. Some bet with Hobi. Some game he’s playing. It’s probably anything other than what your dumb crush-stupefied heart wants it to be.

The waitress looks to you for approval and you give a nod. "Sure. Banana tempura."

The waitress awkwardly smiles as she gathers the empty platters and gives you a chance to break away from his endearingly drunken face. He smiles across the table at you and wrings his hands while you pick up your phone to check on those nonexistent messages. Maybe if you distract yourself enough you can ignore the feelings that are catching up to you tonight.

“Thank you for inviting me back over,” he says, reaching to the nearly empty bottle of saké to pour himself another shot. “I’ve... been wanting to talk to you."

"I’m surprised you didn’t blow up my phone.” It’s supposed to be a joke, but there’s a harshness in your tone that exposes a venomous bite beneath it.

He downs the shot and plants his elbows on the table, leaning forward on them. "I wanted to say it to your face."

“Oh, really?”

You don’t allow yourself to entertain the idea that he’s about to say anything groundbreaking, but you look away from your phone to meet those dark, twinkling eyes. Suddenly there’s hope in your gut. You’re desperate to put some distance between the feelings jumping to the surface.

“I’ve been a dick.”

“No shit.”

Though the fog of alcohol consumes his apology, his eyes focus on you with clarity. “I’m sorry.”

How long have you waited to hear those words? You never really thought about what you might say in response. His apology sits in the air between you for a moment before he speaks again.

“I’m really sorry. Namjoon is right. I am trying to be less of an asshole to you. We don’t…” he catches himself, “I don’t have a lot of close friends who are women.”

“You don’t say.”

That seems to cut through the fog. He hangs his head and focuses his gaze on the table.

“I never wanted to hurt your feelings.”

“Well, you did,” you mumble.

“I know... I’m sorry.” It’s like now that he’s said it once, he can’t stop saying it. He’s not sure how to make you understand. Maybe you do understand and you just won’t forgive him. Can he really blame you for that?

“Why?” you question; it’s the last barrier protecting your heart, the only thing keeping you from caving. “Why do you care now?”

Jungkook’s head lolls to one side as he sits back against his seat and stares at the nearly empty bottle of saké. “I don’t know. I guess I was thinking… I wish I had a save to reload. Before I messed up.”

It seems that’s the best you’re going to get out of him right now. The waitress sets down a beautiful platter of banana tempura meticulously arranged around a simple mound of ice cream, topped with a single cherry and drizzled with decorative chocolate. She places three waters on the table and you both take a moment to politely force smiles and pause your conversation.

He licks his lips and stares down at the plate and then back up at you. “Can we start over?”

“Depends. Are you gonna go back to being a dick when you’re not drunk anymore?”

“No, no. I mean it. I wanna try to be friends.”

“For real?” You swipe the cherry, pop it in your mouth and tilt your head to regard him. You can’t let yourself fully believe him. You want to. The earnestness in his drunken features charms you, but you hold onto a shred of disbelief as a crutch. You’ll wait for the moment he reverts. Hopefully this time you’ll be prepared for the whiplash that comes along with it.

“For real.”

You reflect on his apology as the pair of you dig into the dessert. “Maybe. Prove it.”

He perks up. He’ll take a maybe. Maybe means the damage he’s done might not be irreparable. The guilt weighing on his conscience feels lighter. It’s a start.

“I will. I’ll find some way to make it up to you.”

You roll your eyes, unwilling to put stock in his words. “Is this another bet with Hobi? About how quickly you can make me forgive you?”

Jungkook shakes his head furiously, wisps of wild black hair whipping his cheeks. “No, I mean it. I promise.”

You drag your lip through your teeth as you teeter on the line of acceptance. “What is a promise from a liar worth?”

He drops the flat of his palm to the table and he pouts. “Hey. I mean it…. Hm. If I break my promise…” His eyes scan the table for anything he can use to change your mind. He looks at his arm pressed against the table and then back at you. “You can choose my next tattoo.”

Your eyebrows rise into your hairline. “Really.”

He eagerly nods. “I’ll get whatever you want wherever you want. Just. Not my face.”

“I want that in writing,” you snort.

Jungkook glances around the table and pulls a napkin from under the plate of tempura. “Do you have a pen?”

“Jungkook, you don’t have to—”

“I’m serious.” He’s not taking no for an answer.

You shake your head and rummage through your purse to supply him with a pen. He smooths out the napkin he’s chosen to use as a conduit for his promise. When he’s finished writing he slides it towards you.

Princess

I’m sorry. I can make it right.

I promise. Please give me another chance.

If I blow it you can choose what & where my next tattoo goes.

As long as it’s not my face. Let’s be friends? #promise.com ♡ Jungkook

Of course he signed it with a heart. Despite his inebriation, his handwriting is still neat. Well, that’s one hell of a promise.

“Okay.” You fold the note and drop it into your purse. “We can try.”

His face lights up as he stuffs a piece of tempura into his mouth, happily chomping with his mouth wide open. He reaches for the saké but you slide a water in front of him instead.

“Friends don’t let friends get totally shitfaced at Hajime.”

He frowns at you but seems to accept your answer with a pout.

“Speaking of which… Where is Namjoon?” You crane your neck to look around the restaurant.

“Friday noodle nights common for you guys?” Jungkook asks, digging into the dessert between massive gulps of water.

“No, not really. We’re usually watching movies at my place or hanging with Hobi. But Namjoon wanted to take me out because I was sad,” you say, finally catching sight of your friend on the other side of the bar.

Jungkook’s chewing slows and he regards you with furrowed brows. “Sad?”

Before you can decide how you want to answer, Namjoon is scooting into the booth next to Jungkook and reaching for a piece of tempura. “Mmmm. What did I miss?”

“Y/N was telling me why she’s sad.”

Namjoon nods like he understands exactly what you’ve been talking about. “He’s a dick, right? Like how do you even stand someone up, not once, but twice? Makes no sense.”

“Joonie—”

“And I know what you’re gonna say, but I disagree. It has nothing to do with you or how you look, Y/N. You don’t need to workout like a maniac to try to change anything. Especially not for someone like Jason. I can’t even imagine—”

“Joon.” You click your tongue and slide a glass of water in front of him. “Please, shut the fuck up.”

As you glare at him, he looks at you with raised brows and wide eyes. Unsure what to do now that he’s obviously fubared the conversation, he casts his guilty gaze to his cup and brings it to his lips.

Jungkook stares at you with furrowed brows, trying to wait to let you fill in the blanks even though he’s itching to ask about everything. He picks another piece of tempura and stuffs it into his mouth, but when you remain silent the impulse to pry takes over. “Jason?”

“He stood me up…” you start, but you close your mouth when you realize you’re going to try to defend him. Your throat feels full, like you can’t get enough air through with a giant knot in it like this. You have to whisper so your voice doesn’t crack. “Twice.”

The couple drinking at the table nearby becomes a much more interesting place to rest your eyes than the two men across from you. Tightening your jaw doesn’t prevent the gloss from coating your eyes. Thinking about it makes you feel so stupid and desperate. Bending over backwards a thousand different ways to accommodate him couldn’t convince him to put in even a minimal amount of effort one time.

Jungkook’s eyebrows shoot up in genuine surprise. “Twice?”

The hurt you feel in your chest scorches your cheeks until anger is filling your head like a teakettle ready to release an unhealthy amount of steam right in Jungkook’s face.

“That’s what I get for giving people second chances,” you snap as you focus back on him.

Joon says your name like it’s a warning but you don’t need it. You feel guilty enough for projecting your anger onto Jungkook with a petty one-liner.

“Sorry. It’s not your fault. I just…” Your throat closes around the rest of the words.

Before an uncomfortable silence can settle over the table, Namjoon inches the bottle of saké with his fingertips until it’s in front of him. “Dating is tricky. Jason sucks. It sucks that he hurt you. But you don’t have to twist yourself into whatever you think he wants anymore. And that…” He pours the pitiful remainder of alcohol into a shot glass and slides it towards you.“...is worth celebrating.”

Jungkook silently nods his head in agreement. It’s obvious you’re on the verge of tears and he doesn’t want to be the thing that pushes you over the edge.

A soft smile curls the corners of your mouth. “That’s true, but…” you slide the glass back towards him and steal the last of the banana tempura. “I can celebrate back at my apartment. Finish your water so you’ll be awake enough to join me. Both of you.”

Jungkook perks up and happily reaches for his water while Namjoon gives you a proud, yet confused look. It seems like a new start to something. What that is remains to be seen.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Jungkook watches intently as the colors of the city shine through the windows. He runs his fingers over the soft blanket you keep in the backseat, mouthing the words to the song softly playing from your dashboard. Namjoon has been talking nonstop from the passenger seat, which is fine with Jungkook since he’s feeling a little tired. The last session of the day was a bit more intense than intended, but the client left happy and covered in sweat. A success. But Jungkook is sore and exhausted. Physically and socially.

A sense of relief floods him at the memory of his conversation with you. Things may actually be okay from here. Who would have thought crashing your noodle night with Namjoon could have yielded such results?

His head bobs to the music as his eyes wander across the scenery outside until he grows bored and they drift to the interior of your car. A graduation tassel swings from your rearview mirror as you turn. He follows the movement of the tassel when it swings towards you and his eyes land on your face, or at least what he can see of it from this angle.

You look focused and calm while conversing with Namjoon but your posture is a bit rigid and your hands remain planted on the steering wheel in complete control. There’s something about this candid snapshot of your persona that puts him at ease. Your voice is a soft contrast to Namjoon’s, but equally enthusiastic.

He tilts his head as he leans back in his seat, pulling the blanket over his lap and twisting the fabric around his palm. Your eyes flicker in the rearview mirror, catching his. He gives a tiny wave and rests his head against the cushion, fighting the temptation to close his eyelids for longer than a second. The more he listens to you laugh, the more he finds himself smiling. It’s goofy.

It’s also kind of cute.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Jungkook is surprised when Yoongi answers your knock; he thought he would be asleep. He’s even more surprised when you make yourself at home on his couch and guilt him with a puppy dog pout to make you a drink, and he complies. When Jungkook asks the same, Yoongi tells him there’s beer in the fridge while measuring out the ingredients for your cocktail. The suspicious sour ache of jealousy stabs his gut as he moseys to the fridge but he quickly shakes it off, settling on the floor in front of the tv with a beer in hand.

After a couple hours of drinking, laughing, and playing Jackbox games with the three men, you’re feeling much better about everything. Life is good. Friends are good. Alcohol is very good.

It doesn’t take much to get you drunk. You’re about as much of a lightweight as Hobi and for better or worse everyone has come to know that fact. What’s nice about drinking in Yoongi’s apartment is that you don’t have to walk very far to get home. Things don’t get awkward with the three of them together; it’s actually kind of nice, like a mini Saturday night pregame.

Soon Namjoon and Yoongi are snoring on the couch with a movie playing in the background while you stand in the kitchen with Jungkook. He pours another drink for himself, though he knows it will mostly likely remain unfinished. Tomorrow may bring a massive hangover, but tonight has been surprisingly pleasant. He feels like he’s finally on okay footing with you, maybe even on the road to serious repair. Amazing how well you get along when inhibitions are replaced by inebriation. If that’s what it takes, he’s determined to keep it up.

As he turns his back to place the liquor bottle in the cabinet by the fridge, you swipe a sip of the drink he’s concocted. He spins around in time to see you wrinkle your nose and stick your tongue out.

“Hey, that’s mine!” he pouts.

“Blegh. You can have it. Yuck!” Your face screws up again at the aftertaste.

He drunkenly giggles as he slides the drink closer to him. “What, don’t like sour?”

“Too sour!” You reach for the water bottle Yoongi gave you hours ago and attempt to rinse the puckering sensation from your mouth.

Amused, he tilts his head and watches you take gulp after gulp. He purses his lips and holds back the comment itching to escape, deciding to enjoy a sip of his drink instead. You shimmy out of your hoodie and tie it around your waist and his eyes lazily follow the motion of your arms, noting a slight difference in their musculature. Some errant thought about their shape leads him back to an earlier unaddressed comment that he’s finally comfortable enough to prod you about.

“What kind of workouts are you doing?” he blurts.

Suddenly you feel very exposed. You straighten in your seat and suck in your gut, hyper aware of every imperfection of your body on display to someone so in shape. You immediately begin to fidget with the sleeves of the hoodie you just tied around your waist.

“You don’t have to tell me. I just—” he pauses, exhaling a small breath and looking down at his drink as though he’s wary of continuing the thought.

“No, no it’s fine,” you assure him, too curious to say otherwise. “What is it?”

“When Namjoon said…” he sighs and takes a sip, smacking his lips and licking them before looking back to you. “I thought maybe I can prove myself to you by helping you come up with a plan.”

“You don’t have to do that.” You plant an elbow on the counter and lean on it.

“I want to,” he insists, reaching out for your arm.

His hand is like fire engulfing your skin and your eyelids flutter at the sensation. Instinctively you place a hand over his and rub your thumb anxiously over it. He looks down to where your thumb grazes his knuckles and then back up to your face with a surprised smile.

“Um… Everything,” you say, trying to sound as vague and nonchalant as possible so he doesn’t judge you for your lack of knowledge.

“Like, full body?”

“Uh...” You’ve managed to make a habit of going to his gym a few days a week while successfully avoiding him, but it seems that time is coming to an end. “I… machine.”

“Oh. Like at a gym? Did you join one?” He seems genuinely curious.

“Um, yeah.” Suddenly you pull your hand back when you realize the speed at which your thumb is moving.

“Which one?”

The more you say, the more suspicious you seem, but is saying less any better? Jungkook rests his elbow on the counter and simply looks at you but you don’t look back. A slow smile spreads his lips as the possibility dawns on him.

“Princess… Did you join Iron Kingdom?”

You puff your cheeks and force the air through the tiny opening of your mouth. You don’t offer any sort of confirmation and continue to avoid his gaze.

“And you didn’t tell me?” he playfully prods, drumming his fingers against your forearm.

“I… Yeah,” you admit, your voice small as you stare at the counter. “I didn’t want you to know.

“Why?”

“Because.”

“Because?”

“I don’t want to give you another thing to make fun of me for.”

“I’m not gonna make fun of you.” When you don’t respond he tugs on your arm. The motion is enough to angle you towards him. “Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.”

“What?” you grumble, staring at your lap even as you face him.

He takes your hands in his and drunkenly waves them around. “Heeeeeeeey. Look at me.”

He pouts until you reluctantly drag your eyes to meet his. “What?”

“Everyone starts somewhere,” he says softly. “Even me.”

The shift in his demeanor catches you off guard and you subconsciously lean forward as you relax. “Well I started with Hwasa, but I was too sore to ask for another session with her.”

He nods sympathetically, clapping his hand over yours. “You should try again.”

You shake your head. “I don’t know. I feel like…”

“Like?” he prods when you let the silence trail for a bit too long.

“I don’t know what I’m doing,” you sigh. “I feel like I don’t belong there. I look so stupid reading the instructions on the machines. I don’t even think I’m doing it right.”

“What?” He makes a sound between a laugh and a grunt. “There’s nothing wrong with making sure you don’t hurt yourself. Nobody knows how to instantly do things. If they tell you they do, they’re lying.”

“Or they’re Namjoon,” you say with a roll of your eyes, glancing over at your snoring friend.

He smiles and clicks his tongue against his teeth in thought. “I didn’t know what I was doing when I started.”

“Really.”

You’re skeptical. It’s always seemed like he was born in a gym. Or maybe hatched. He’s kind of inhumanly gorgeous. Maybe he sprouted from a flower like a mythical god.

“For real. First time doing squats. I think it was gym class? Yeah, I was like twelve or thirteen. I was… not very athletic. Didn’t play sports or anything. Kind of shy. Didn’t really have a lot of friends either…”

The way he trails off makes your heart hurt. Puberty isn’t nice to most people. It’s hard to imagine a world where someone like Jungkook isn’t instantly popular and naturally fit. While you’re not exactly the same person you were at twelve, a lot of your interests and personality quirks have remained the same. You’re still painfully awkward at times. How did he manage to overcome something like that? Is it not ingrained in him like it is you?

“Just a big dork, you know?” He laughs. “I see this girl I had a crush on, Amber. She’s looking at me. I think I have to impress her. So I’m stacking up weight and I think I’m hot shit and go too fast. Know what happened?”

“Please don’t tell me you dropped it on your foot or something,” you plead, squeezing his palms at the way he’s building up the story. The secondhand embarrassment is too real.

“I hear a pop.”

“No!” you gasp, bringing your hands to your face as if you can stop the past from happening.

“And pain. So much pain. I don’t remember putting the weights down but I remember ending up on my back, staring up at the ceiling.”

“Oh no. Knees?”

“Worse.” He points down to his crotch. “Pulled a muscle in my groin. Had to sit the rest of the day with an ice pack on my junk. Was not fun. My point is: don’t give up. You learn more as you go. Give Hwasa another shot.”

His anecdote gives you pause but you’re desperate to cling to the comfort of your anxiety. “My free trial with her is almost up and I don’t think I’ll be able to afford to keep at it.”

“More excuses,” he teases, taking a sip of his drink. “At this point I should just—” His eyes widen, a lightbulb practically forming above his head as he puts his cup down. “I’ll be your personal trainer!”

“Uhh…”

“No, no. It’s perfect. We’re friends now.” He smiles, proud of himself for finding a way to prove himself to you. “I can teach you everything you need to know about working out. I can set up a plan for you and figure out the best way to help you achieve your goals. Oh, man we’re gonna have to figure out your goals. What do you—”

“Hold on. Hold on,” you interrupt with a nervous laugh. “You’re missing the part where I still can’t afford it.”

He rolls his eyes and grabs your glass, holding it under the sink to refill it. “Don’t worry about that. I’ll cover it.”

You’re stunned into silence as you observe the expanse of his back, searching the black fabric of his t-shirt for the definition of his muscles. He sets the cup in front of you, waiting for your agreement. When it doesn’t come, he second guesses himself. Did he overstep?

“I mean if you’re okay with that. Would-would you want to do that?”

The innocent drunken sparkle in his eyes makes your stomach do a flip. When you woke up this morning you hardly thought the day would include getting sloshed with Jungkook and having him offer to take you on as a fitness trainee. It’s like he’s opened himself up just enough for you to see the soft mess beneath. You like it. You like it a lot and you kind of hate yourself for it. While you don’t know if you can trust him past the evening, you find yourself hoping you can.

“You won’t make fun of me?” you ask timidly before bringing the cup of water to your lips.

“It’s my job not to make fun of you. We start where you’re at and go from there. And like I said, I’ll cover the fees for as long as you want. No pressure.” He smiles at you. “What do you think?”

“...Okay,” you murmur with a nod of your head. “If you’re serious, then I’m… I’m in!”

His lips part to expose his teeth as his grin spreads. “Yes!”

As he brings his hand up in a sign of victory, his knuckles knock against his glass. You reach for the cup with impaired reflexes, hands fumbling over the slippery surface in conjunction with his. The sour contents spill across the counter as the pair of you struggle to right the glass. While he’s quicker at getting the glass upright, your brain is faster at processing what to do next and you already have a paper towel in hand, wiping up the liquid as fast as possible.

Your eyes follow the spill to the edge of the counter where it’s flooded over the side. Acting on instinct rather than rational thought, you quickly press down where the liquid has begun to pool in his lap. As you fold the paper towel over, you rub frantically as if the action will keep the stain from setting into the fabric. He shifts in his seat and squeaks out a sound so small that you can’t actually tell whether it came from him or the chair.

It only dawns on you how inappropriate your actions are when you glance towards his face and find his wide eyes gazing back at you. His cheeks, already flushed from inebriation, seem twice as vivid and his mouth is parted slightly as though he means to speak, but he doesn’t. Maybe he doesn’t want to embarrass you, but it’s too late for that.

Your palm stills against his crotch as the shape beneath becomes clear in your mind. For a second you’re frozen, but your lips work quickly to mumble an apology. It feels like an eternity before you will your drunken fingers to release the paper towel. The clearing of Jungkook’s throat is followed by a tiny giggle, then a full on snort. A grin spreads across your lips and you soon follow him into a fit of laughter. You thank the universe for the small mercy of being drunk enough to push your embarrassment to the side for the time being.

“I wasn’t thinking!” you wheeze, tears in your eyes from laughing so hard. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It’ll dry.” He laughs, dabbing his pants and shirt in the absence of your hand. As he stands he pulls the hem of his shirt away from his torso and looks down at it. “Really. It’s my fault I’m so…”

“Sticky?” You quirk an eyebrow at him, a blatant flirtatious action thinly disguised as a joke as you eye the blot of liquor staining the lower half of his shirt.

Both of his eyebrows raise and a mischievous smile curls the corner of his lips. “...Wet.”

You consider his answer with a pleased hum and turn back to the counter to polish off the last of your water. You’re friends now, right? It can’t be that easy. But it kind of is. So what’s wrong with a little harmless flirting between friends?

Drunk brain, who happens to be a notorious hoe, assures you it’s great. Rational brain might disagree, but she’s taking a well-deserved nap. You’ve at least had a good night. You’re not sure it matters at this point who is giving you the attention you crave. It feels good. So good, in fact, you’re sure you can indulge drunk brain a little more.

You’re drawn to the inky shapes swirling around Jungkook’s bicep as he wipes the counter down. Every time your eyes begin to focus on an object marking his skin with some kind of meaning, he moves and you lose it. It’s brush strokes, isn’t it? You’ve definitely seen a paintbrush and mountains and a knife surrounded by roses. A swathe of grey and purple connects to each one you’ve seen, but you know there are more.

Before you can blurt that you’re dying to know how many he has and how bad it hurt to get them, he turns toward the sink and begins to work his t-shirt up his torso. You watch in awe as the toned muscles of his back are exposed. The image of the bright phoenix does little to hide their definition.

Trying to will yourself to look away is of no use; he’s hot and you’re drunk enough to acknowledge that fact. Of course he peeks at you just as the shirt slips over his head to find you open-mouthed and dazed, ogling him as though there isn’t any shame in the world that could pull your gaze from him. He turns to the fridge to give you a moment to compose yourself, nabbing a water bottle from the shelf in the process. You’re clearly not ready for the way he quickly spins on the balls of his feet to face you.

Y/N.exe has stopped working.

Your fingers hang in the air suspiciously until you lazily drop them. But Jungkook dons a toothy grin and has the audacity to look shy. He mockingly shields his chest from you with the shirt clutched in his hands.

“Princess! Are you… checking me out?”

Somehow you don’t let the fire in your face turn your brain to ash.“Pfft, no.”

“What’re you doing, then?” he teases with a laugh as he sits, scooting his chair closer to yours.

“Counting,” you reply simply, brow furrowed in concentration. To drive the point home, you poke at his flesh everywhere you can make out an object drawn into its surface.

“How many?” he wonders, watching with cloudy, amused eyes.

“Mmm…” You trail your finger down his arm and back up, following the curve of the brushstroke around his shoulder. “Can’t tell if this counts as one.”

He shrugs and rests his head on his palm as he leans against the counter. “What do you think?”

You hesitate when he quickly quirks a brow.

“I think… A lot.”

“Definitely accurate,” he says with a grin.

Awkward laughter steers the pair of you towards your waters. The TV in the background provides enough noise to steal your focus; you’re grateful for the distraction from the attractive man beside you. Drunk brain is telling you to touch him again, to grab his hand, to feel the touch of someone just for the night, to ruin every good thing this night has started to rebuild between you. Anything to stave off the emptiness of your bed, the 2AM thoughts of failure, and the drunken desperation to find someone, anyone, who will fall in love with whatever image you happen to project on your dating profile.

Heart pounding wildly in your chest and blood rushing through your ears, your fingertips tap against the countertop as they inch closer to where his arm rests. Luckily your futile attempts at nonchalance go unnoticed. Jungkook anxiously turns his water bottle over in his hands, trying to gather words in his brain before freeing them from his mouth.

“So…” he begins.

You jump at the sudden sound and retract your hand while he’s not paying you any mind.

“I was thinking. About that guy…”

You wish you could at least pretend you don’t know who he’s talking about. You’ve vented plenty tonight, but still your heart sinks. Deleting Jason’s digital footprint from your life was simple and quick, but the feelings of rejection and disappointment that swirl in the back of your mind spill forward the longer his pause continues.

“I know this probably means nothing coming from me. But I just— I know you liked him, but you can do better.“

Your posture stiffens at his reassurance and you find yourself grateful he’s not looking at you. Do you deserve better?

“You deserve better,” he affirms, as if somehow aware of your internal struggle.

“Thanks,” you murmur with a distinct lack of enthusiasm as you stare down your glass.

It's cry hours, isn’t it?

Realizing you don’t believe him, he takes a deep breath and nudges you with his elbow. “Hey.”

“What.” You refuse to look up because you know you’re on the verge of an irrational stream of tears over some guy you hardly knew. It’s stupid and you know it. But the wet warmth coating your eyes tells you it’s coming regardless.

“I’m... sorry that you don’t feel like you do. Some people can’t get over the weight of their own shit. But that doesn’t mean it’s on you to pick it up for them. If they can’t even bother to carry themselves to meet you halfway, then they’re not worth the effort.”

It’s a perfect time for your heart to seize up and it takes the opportunity to do so. The advice he offers doesn’t stave off the tears, but it resonates deep within you. Namjoon said something similar. It makes you ache to hear it again from someone else. It just leads you back to the same questions you keep asking yourself. What’s so wrong with you that people don’t even want to try? Is it your personality? Physicality? Is it a lack of confidence? What is it?

‘I can’t even get a shitty guy to like me. Maybe I’m the one not worth the effort.’ You don’t dare say those words out loud. Pity isn’t something you’re looking for. A warm body to fill your bed maybe, but not pity.

“Sounds easy when you say it like that,” you murmur, trying in vain to will the tears not to fall. You’re quick to swipe at them and force a smile. “I guess I have trouble giving up on people. It’s not that I’m naive. I try to be realistic. But no matter how many times I get fucked over I just... hope for the best in people. I can’t help it.”

He pats your arm reassuringly. “That’s why you deserve better.”

If only it was as simple as hearing those words and magically being able to believe it. A big chunk of your confidence has crumbled away and there’s no clear path to restoration. As the warmth of his palm comes to rest against your arm, you place your hand over his and squeeze.

“I don’t know if I believe it,” you pause and thoughtfully add, “but thanks for saying it.”

His eyebrows raise in surprise and he offers a tiny, “You’re welcome.”

A shaky chuckle passes your lips. All of his features seem to soften the more you look at them. Maybe it’s the drunken gloss coating his big brown eyes or the way his lips slightly part as he looks back at you. The tightly coiled nerves in your belly urge you to unravel.

Although it's a subtle gesture, he licks his lips as he smiles and it practically seals your fate. If you don't leave now you're bound to do something you'll regret.

"It's late. I should sleep."

Or masturbate.

The speed at which you launch yourself from the seat is unpleasant. You're not sure what's worse: the dizzying vertigo or waves nausea sloshing in your gut. Jungkook's reflexes may be delayed but he's a steady mass of muscle the moment you reach out to steady yourself.

"Whoa. You okay?"

"Maybe," you mumble, finding yourself drawn to the heat radiating from his skin. Instead of walking away, slump down to rest your cheek against his shoulder and sling an arm around him. You might be drunker than you thought. "I don't know."

"Hmm. What do you need, princess?"

"Just wanna stop spinning."

His stance shifts to better accommodate the additional weight you press against him.

"How about you take over Yoongi's bed tonight," he suggests softly. "He's passed out anyway."

"No, I should go home." You peel your cheek from the warmth of his skin.

“You gonna make it there?”

“Yes,” you say indignantly. The world may be a bit wobbly right now, but you’re certain you can handle the short stroll down the hall.

"Okay.” He smiles, loosening his hold. As you step back your foot catches on the leg of the chair and it drags loudly against the floor.

Despite Jungkook’s attempt to keep you standing by grabbing at your arms, he loses his balance and he drops to his knees. The chair clatters to the floor before your ass does. Luckily his grip keeps your back and head far from impact, but you’re too cramped to be comfortable.

“Are you okay?” he asks. Those big, dark doe eyes of his are frozen in fear and a frown adorns his face. He looks so serious it’s ridiculous.

You can’t help but laugh, wiggling backwards to make space between his body and the heat steadily building between your legs. “I’m fine. Stop making that face.”

“Huh? What do you mean?” He sits back on his feet and tilts his head to the side in confusion.

He breaks into a fit of giggles when you dramatically mimic his expression. You roll back onto your elbows, making another ridiculous face to further mock him.

“No, no. It’s more like…” Jungkook takes the opportunity to lean over you, reaching with one hand to squeeze your cheeks to pucker your lips. You blow a disjointed raspberry at him before pulling his hand off to the side.

While the clamor of the fallen chair did nothing to rouse the men on the couch, the sound of Jungkook’s hearty laughter is loud enough to disturb the rhythmic snores of Namjoon.

Jungkook sits back on his heels and peeks over the countertop. He seems miles away, even as you sit up and scoot in to bring yourself closer. Laughter fades into a quiet hum as Namjoon’s snoring resumes.

You're lost in the abyss of his gaze as he turns his head to look back at you. All that remains in your brain at this point is a foggy desire to tug on the silky spirals of his ebony hair until he presses himself against you one more time.

Your hand settles for following the curves of his bicep instead, wondering how it might feel to be wrapped within his embrace. Some might say liquor makes you bold and stupid, and they're right. They should say it. But it also makes you feel invincible, like a goddamn glowing Mario star power-up.

"Princess?"

Enraptured, his eyes follow the motion of your hand as it slithers around his arm and squeezes. Unable to ignore the prompt, he answers with a flex against your palm. His ego swells when you shiver and noticeably hold your breath.

You know it's a mistake. You know it goes against all of your sober judgement, but you find yourself doing it anyway. It doesn't matter that you still harbor a grudge that holds your heart hostage. Drunk hoe vibes are taking the wheel. You’re tired, drunk as hell, and just want to feel wanted. And he's here.

Every fiber of your inebriated being is singing in unison: Why the fuck not?

Heartbeat pounding against your eardrums, you attempt to gauge his reaction as you lean towards him. It's hard to tell from beneath half-lidded eyes, but you think he's leaning towards you too. If he isn't you suppose you can always play it off like you're just a mess. It's not far from the truth. Focusing on the tiny freckle below his lip, you allow yourself to finally close your eyes and go for it.

But the universe isn’t here for your dumb boozy bitch mistakes.

The front door swings open with the sound of jingling keys dropping to the floor. It snaps you back to reality and you freeze, realizing there's no defense that will save you. Jungkook is quick to disengage, poking his head above the counter to acknowledge Hoseok’s presence with a wave. But his friend is completely enamored with the company he’s ushering towards his bedroom.

“Yeah, baby? How bad?” Hoseok whispers to the giggling girl wrapped around his arm.

He pins the stranger against the door to drag his tongue across her neck. Their bodies move rhythmically in a slow grind, a precursor for what’s likely to come. Jungkook purses his lips. How long until one of them notices him watching? It’s not until the girl moans Hoseok’s name softly that Jungkook spares a panicked look towards you.

Oh shit.

You gesture for him to get down before he draws their attention. The last thing you want to explain is why you’re on your knees in Hoseok’s kitchen with a very shirtless Jungkook standing close by. He obliges your silent request, squatting down beside you.

“Feel how hard you made me?” Hobi chuckles quietly.

The girl giggles, her voice growing closer. “You gonna fuck me right here or what?”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Naughty girl. What if my roommate wakes up? Looks like he has a friend over too. You really want them to see what a dirty slut you are?”

You can hear her giggle as he directs her where to go, failing to keep his voice down so you hear every filthy thing he says after. Your hands fly to cover your mouth. Is your skin made of lava? You want to blame it on the close proximity to Jungkook, but the only thing you can imagine is Hoseok’s dick and the eager mystery woman about to be impaled by it. Can you scrub your brain of this memory? How are you supposed to look at him after this?

Jungkook watches your face carefully, trying his hardest not to laugh. Your eyes look so big he’s pretty sure they could roll out of your skull any second. Are you really so innocent? The way you cover your mouth says you are, but maybe it’s just the shock. Maybe you’re just trying to not laugh. Or scream. Or breathe? It kind of looks like you might pass out.

Are you gonna make it, princess? he wonders.

Once you hear Hoseok's bedroom door close, you fuss your hands over your hair and scramble to your feet, releasing a big exhale. The hushed words fall from your lips while you scurry away like a timid mouse. "I should go."

Despite being too far to make contact, he reaches out as you round the counter. "Wait—"

As soon as the word leaves his mouth he struggles to come up with the rest of his statement. There’s no reason to keep you here, except to maybe laugh a little about what just happened to smooth over any second-hand embarrassment. So why doesn’t he want you to go?

He swallows down the blank space caught in his throat and searches every last crevice of his brain for something of import to say. Guilt weighs his gut down, though there isn’t a clear cause. He’s probably screwed something up again without realizing it.

“Thanks for giving me another shot,” he says softly.

You breathe a sigh of relief and offer a tiny smile as you half turn, your hand already on the door handle. “Don’t blow it.”

He nods with a smile. “I won’t. Goodnight.”

“‘Night,” you mumble.

As soon as the door is closed you practically sprint down the hall to lock yourself within your apartment. Maybe it will also lock out all the mistakes your brain has made tonight.

The world feels colder now that you’re not pressed against the human-shaped heater that is Jeon Jungkook. Thinking about him makes your heart swell and ache at the same time. Regardless of how badly you wish you'd asked him to bed, you know loneliness is fleeting and guilt would be a far worse feeling to be saddled with.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

Jungkook picks up the fallen chair, finding your soft, worn hoodie draped over it. Rubbing a thumb over the material, he considers running it back to you, but he can't remember which door is yours. It's not like he's been here often enough to know. Instead he slips his arms through the sleeves before flipping the hood over his head.

He settles on the floor in the space he previously claimed for the night, pulling a blanket out from under Yoongi's ass. Yoongi rolls his head up, a scowl on his features though his eyes remain closed. He grumbles but lies down, facing the couch.

Jungkook regards his friend for a moment before deciding to drape the blanket over him instead of claiming it for himself. Jungkook rolls onto his side and fluffs the throw pillow under his head. As he watches the credits roll on the TV, he nuzzles into your sweater.

He closes his eyes, thinking of you. He knows he shouldn't linger on the little occurrences of the night, especially with how foggy his brain is. He can't trust anything about his memory.

Still he thinks of the way your fingers trailed along his arm and curled tightly around his bicep. He lets himself dwell on the tiny sound you made, the involuntary tremble of your body, and the subsequent hitch in your breath.

He smiles and inhales the subtle scent you've left behind. A new spark of adrenaline fans flames that inflate his ego, spreading warmth from his stomach up into his chest. The world may wobble around him right now, but the little magical warmth within his gut helps him comfortably drift off to dreamland like he's the world's most immovable object.