#maybe theres something in there!☆!°•°•

[plantingthepast]

chosen ones

[svt-ara]

the weight on her shoulders after yuta left was still heavy even after few months. the stronger medications for her ocd came with side effects— a body that felt unfamiliar and rumors that spread faster than the truth ever could. the asthma wasn't just a medical emegercy. it was the moment everything she had been holding in finally cracked, the last straw.

ᯓ★ 𝗚𝗘𝗡𝗥𝗘 angst | ⸝⸝⸝⸝ 𝗪𝗔𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗦 description of asthma attack, emotional distress, anxiety, burnout, emotional vulnerability, a kind of trauma (implied), ocd (implied), idk if theres more let me know | ⸝⸝⸝⸝ 𝗧𝗜𝗠𝗘𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗘 2019. | ⸝⸝⸝⸝ 𝗪𝗖 4.5k | ⸝⸝⸝⸝ 𝗔𝗡 i don't know how asthma attack works that well so don't come at me if i got something wrong 🙏also wondering if i should make a taglist, if anyone would even be apart of it lol. not proofread

꒰୨ 𝓜asterlist ୧꒱

the air in the dressing room was loud, not in the way people usually meant it— the way that silence turned heavy when too many voices overlapped, when blow dryers buzzed in one corner and low hum of tension pressed against the walls.

it wasn't unusual, it was always like this before a show especially when there were fourteen of them. fourteen people in various stages of preparation— eyeliner half-finished, dino stretching in the corner, seungkwan and dokyeom warming their voices with loud, theatrical sounds that bounced off the walls. jeonghan pacing by the door, his fingers brushing againist the frame as he tried to steal a moment of fresh air before the stage swallowed them.

add in the stylist, make-up artists, managers and the camera crew and the room was an universe of its own. busy, bright, too croweded for comfort but they all learned how tune it out.

ara sat in front of the mirror, posture too straight— too perfect— to be comfortable. her reflection stared back at her blank under layers of fundation, eyes focused but distant. around her laughter scattered here and there, the make-up artist tapping brushes against palettes— her own make-up always took longer.

but none of it broke throught the fog in her head, not really.

she adjusted the collar of her shirt for the fifth time, fingers brushing over the fabric at her waist as it clung tighter than she remembered during fittings. maybe it had shrunk, maybe she was just imagining things. or maybe not.

the stylist had said nothing, but she had noticed— she had noticed the slight hesitation when she zipped the outfit earlier, how her hands moved a lille slower that usual, how she avoided meeting ara's eyes entirely.

her gaze dropped to the table in front of her— a row of lipsticks shades, perfectly lined up, a bottle of water she hadn't touched and then her phone face-down. she didn't need to check it, she already knew it was empty. the breakup had been months ago, yuta was long gone. but some weights don't lift up just because time had passed.

she had tried to keep up with the work— the rehearsals, interviews, choreographies, diet plans but her ocd had flared under the pressure. rituals became harder to maintain, rituals impossible to follow.

eventually the company stepped in at, «try something stronger» they said, not unkindly— but not exactly gently either. they didn't ask how she felt about it, they just slid the prescription across the table, like a solution. and in some way it was. the thoughts slowed, compulsions quieted, rituals faded— but so did other parts of her.

her weight changed— just slightly, but enough. enough for the fans to notice, the comments to start and enough for rumors to start.

someone called her name. once— then again, a bit louder, more insistent. she blinked, slowly, as if waking up from a dream she didn't realized she was in. «we need to fix the mic belt» a woman said gently, crounchig beside her chair. the small transmitter in one hand, the thin elastic strap in the other. ara nodded wordlessy, rising from the make-up chair in a way that felt too rehearsed. her hand moved with her lifting the back of her shirt with a small tug, exposing just enough of her lower back for the belt to sit flat against her skin. it was cold— she barely fliched.

«there» the staff member said with a quiet pat, fastening the strap with practiced ease.

«let's go standby» the manager's voice cut throught the room, sharp and slicing clean throught the white noise that had settled around them. the members moved as one, chaotic but efficent— someone laughed, someone almost cursed under his breath after bumping his shoulder into something, someone was nervous like it was the frist time. ara just followed quietly, she was getting used to it.

the hallway trowards the stage was narrow. hoshi fell into step beside her, brushing past slightly. he didn't said anything at frist, just offered a look— one of those unreadable ones he wore so easly. then, after few seconds, he finally spoke.

«you okay?» he asked, his voice low enough that it could get lost under the soft noise of ther feet touching the ground. she hesistated— then smiled, small and fleeting «im good». it was automatic, too easy. he watched her for a moment longer, not convinced, but he didn't pressed— it wasn't the moment.

the stage crew guided them with quiet emegercy— hand signals, short clipped pharases. and soon they were lined up in formation— she was at the far end, just near the wings. her eyes dropped to the floor, black tape lines were there. the shimmer of the lights beyond. the crowd's distant roar was raising— louder, clearer.

her in-ear monitors didn't sat quiet right. she adjusted them again, and again. her skin felt too hot, flushed under the layers of foundation, raw under the sweat that handn't even the time to form. a staff member ran past with a headset «one minute!».

she galaced sideways. everyone else looked focused, calm, present. mingyu cracked his neck, vernon bounced slightly on his feet and woozi rolled his shoulder. but ara felt the pressure crawling up her neck, settling under her ribs— she didn't know if it was panic or some kind of awareness. like her body was trying to whisper something she didn't want to hear.

then lights went out, the crowd scream and the music started.

the bass dropped like a heartbeat, steady and commanding, and the stage lights cut thought the darkness. ara moved on reflex— step, reach, turn. her body responding before her mind could catch up, lost in muscle memory. she had performed mansae more times she could count, enough that her feet knew the beat before the spearker did. they moved around the stage for over an hour— dancing, singing, jumping, interacting with each other and the crowd, riding the high of adrenaline and routine. there was barely time to breath, let alone pause and collect their toughts.

and then came getting closer coreography straight after clap, and it demanded everything— sharp movements, synchronized transitions, energy that left no space for fatigue. her breath was already shallow by the pre chorus— too soon, too early. it shouldn't have felt like this. her libs still obeyed her, but they did so reluctantly, as if they turned heavier and denser— like pushing throught water.

there was a weight settling in her chest— not the emotional kind, not entirely at least. she felt that was something physical, tangible, real.

and she knew it, she recognized it— the tightening wasn't new. the catch in her throat, the way her lungs seemed to shrink everytime she tried to take in air— it had been months, but the sensation was unforgettable. still she kept going on, even if her vision began to tilt sightly, just enough for the edges of the stage to feel curved.

joshua passed close behind her, brushing her shoulder sightly. his galance was quick, concerned, but she dismissed it with a subtle nod that barely masked the way her lungs were already fighting for space. keep going, keep dancing— it'll pass, but it didn't.

by the time the song reached its final chorus, ara felt like she was chasing her own breath, scraping at her ribs with ever inhale that never quite filled her. her hands trembled as they fell into the next formation, and she missed a cue— just one. a turn came a second too late. anyone unfamiliar with the routine wouldn't have noticed, but others would. and she knew they did.

her gaze flicked toward the wing without thinking, her body instinctively searching for a way out, but her feet stayed rooted to the spot. then her line came— only few words— but her lung locked instantly. it was like a trap had snapped shut inside her chest. no air came in, and for a second everything inside her froze. and when they didn't hear her familiar voice singing the lines, someone immediatly chimed him— it probably was dokyeom.

her knees didn't give, not yet, but her step faltered just enough that minghao reached for her, almost unconsciously, catching her elbow. «ara» he wishpered, low enough that only she could hear, but she shook her head and tried to keep moving, even though the stage had started spinning and the lights overhead felt like a sun she couldn't escape from.

her body was shutting down piece by piece. her skin burned under the layers of make up and sweat, her throat was raw, and every breath she tried to take felt like drowing. she couldn't even hear the music anymore— just the rasping sound of her own breath, ragged, fast, uneaven. and then, she stopped.

her hands frist moved to her mic belt, fumbling with the strap like it was suddently soffucating her. then her hands moved to her chest, fingers spread wide as if trying to hold herself togheter— like pressing down might somehow force the air back into her lungs. the camera, mercifully, missed the moment. but the members didn't.

from backstage, someone yelled— her name maybe, or something more urgent— but it came through muffled and distorted, like sound underwater. everything around her blurred as her feet started to move, slow and unsteady, a despreate shuffle toward the backstage, somewhere quieter and where she could breathe. but she didn't make far. her legs gave out just as she reached the edge of the stage, knees like paper, and in the next second someone caught her— arm gripping tightly around her arms, not carefully or gently, just urgently. she didn't even see who it was.

everything was spinning, her vision a tunnel of light and black spots, her ears ringing louder than the music. she felt herself being pulled, dragged off stage with force that was more instinct. it was like whoever grabbed her didn't care how it looked, only that she was safe. her chest was still heaving, desperate for air that wouldn't come. makeup smeared from her temples to her jaw, her fingers clutched at the back of someone's shirt, it was cotton damped with sweat.

the moment her foot crossed into the backstage, probably everything was even more chaotic than it had been out there under the stage lights. the roar of the crowd faded, replaced by something sharper, more raw-panic in its purest form. people were talking over each other, overlapping voices crashing. their words came fast and useless, like water thrown on a fire that had already swallowed the room.

hands reached for her all at once— someone tugger her in-ear monitor off too roughly, someone tried to unclip the mic belt from her waist while she was still gasping like she was drowning and their urgency was making everything clumsy. her knees buckled fully this time, and someone caught her just before she collapsed entirely. they lowered her to the ground too fast, without grace, and the cold concrete met her spine like a slap, like the reality.

the pressure in her chest didn't ease, it only grew heavier. her fingers trembled as they clawed at the fabric of her shirt, uselessy. someone knelt beside, this time decisive, holding a small plastic device in one hand— the emergency inhaler.

«ara, we've got it, okay? just hang on» the voice was quick and focused. they gently pried her hand from her chest and pressed the inhaler to her lips. she barely responded, but she tried, «breathe in now ara». the frist breath didn't land right, it slipped to shallow. but the second, it caught. her eyes clenched shut, face crumpling not from pain but from the terrifying relif of it. she gasped again— harder, and a single tear slipped down the side of her nose without her noticing.

the pressure hadn't left— her chest still hurted like hell and her lungs still dragged, but it was something. oxygen finally reaching the edges of her panic. around her the chaos didn't stop, but her world slowed but she could still hear a snippet of frantic voices. «tell hoshi to stay back— wait, no. wait he's coming» and through all the blur, someone's voice— louder than the rest, called out her name.

he was there, on his knees beside her before anyone could stop him. she didn't answer, still too focused on the rising and falling of her chest, but her eyes flicked towards him. his voice was too soft for the room around them. «you're okay» he slowly reached out, carefully, as he brushed a strand of hair of her damp forehead. his hands trembling «you scared the hell out of me».

she opened her mouth to say something— maybe to apologize, maybe to lie and say she was fine, but nothing came out. just another shallow breath. «don't do that, don't say nothing» hoshi said, gently but firmly, her hand still gripped the inhaler like a lifeliner. he noticed the way her knuckles were white around it, and without asking, he helped her steady it again.

everything faded, and just for a second, it was just him and her— his hand on the back of her neck, firm and steady, while her still trembling fingers gripped around his arm. not pulling, just holding on, as if he was the only think keeping her to the ground. his eyes scanned her face, not with fear anymore, but with something quieter. somethind he didn't have the words for right now, that only she would understand.

she wasn't sure how long it had been— if seconds or minutes, before her breath finally stopped scraping her lungs like broken glass. time felt distorted, stretched and compressed all at once. the bright lights above her head buzzed faintly, the distant echo of footsteps and voices bleeding into a background hum she couldn't quite focus on. everything around her was still too fast, too loud, too much but she was glad the worst had passed.

her head throbbed with a dull, persistent anche, and her chest still felt like something heavy had been placed on it, pressing her down from the inside. but every breath came out easier now, and even if her limbs felt numbs and some trembling, that alone felt like a miracle.

her back was now pressed against the cool wall of the hallway, the chill of the concrete leaked through the thin layer of her clothes. she didn't remember moving, she hadn't the strenght for it. only hoshi must've done it— quiet and efficiently, in that way he always did things when he was worried but trying to not show it.

she blinked slowly, still disoriented. her gaze moved across the hallway— many people still rushing back and forth, some of their voices urgent but none of them registred fully. she still felt like she was underwater. and he was there— squatting in front of her, elbows on his knees, his entire body lightly leaning fowards ara.

his eyes fixed on hers with a soft gaze— not worried nor scolding, that was the last thing she needed at the moment. one of his hand moved near her ankle, not touching it, but close enough that she could feel the warmth of his body. she didn't know if she wanted to cry or collapse again just from the weight of that small, quite kindness.

someone crouched beside her— a women from the staff. her voice was gentle but firm, the kind used when giving instructions meant to be followed without protest. «ara, stay there. you don't have to go back on stage, really» her hand hovered near ara's shoulder like she wanted to offer comfort, but hesitated last second. «you've done more than enough, they'll understand» she added softly, her eyes scanning ara's face, looking for some sing— pain, disconfort or protest.

ara didn't respond at frist, her gaze was fixed ahead— unfocused. she wanted to say yes, to agree, to let herself stay down but her muscles wouldn't commit. her body was still busy recovering from everything that just happened. the staff member knelt a little lower, one knee hitting the floor «ara?» she leaned foward, to give a look at her face. that's when she finally turned her head, just enough to meet her eyes.

there was no anger or resistance in her expression— just exhaustion, raw and unfiltered. her lips parted like she was about to say something, but no words came out. «you don't have to prove anything to anyone, okay?» she said, this time more gentle. «let them handle it. just breathe»

she didn't need to look up to catch him staring, she could feel it— his gaze was steady and unwavering, it was burning under her sking gently. it wasn't heavy, not the kind of stare that asked questions or demanded explenations.

when she finally dared to lift her eyes, his gaze met hers without hesitation and it didn't flicker. it was caring, deeply so— there was no trace of pity of concern that needed to be seen by others. it was that kind of understanding that came from knowing someone for too long to be fooled by a forced smile or a rehearsed 'im fine'.

she swallowed hard, not because she had something to say, but because something about the way he looked at her made her throat ache again. like her body didn't know how to hold that kind of softness without falling apart.

«you don't have to stay. i'm okay now» hoshi tilted his head sightly, the ghost of a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth, but it didn't reach his eyes. «you're not» his voice sounded quiet, gentle. she blinked fast, trying to keep her face togheter. she didn't want to cry— not here, with that big amount of staff crowding the hallway. her fingers curled around the fabric of her pants, grounding herself in that tiny motion.

«im serious» she murmured, eyes drifting toward the floor «i'll be back» her voice was barely here, just enough for him to hear. but hoshi caught it, like he caught everything. his eyes lingered on her a second longer, and she swore she saw something flicker in them— pride, maybe. or worry. or both.

he didn't answer right away, just breathed in throught his nose— sharp and slow. letting her go now was harder than he wanted it to be. then someone called his name— loud, urgent. «hoshi, you have to go on stage. now» he didn't move at frist, he just stared at her still leaning on the cold wall.

«hoshi» he shifted his weight, reluctantly. his jaw tensed and then gave a small nod, not to the staff, at her. not approval, not permession, it was more like 'please, don't make me regret walking away'. then he turned and jogged down the hall, shoulder tight, vanishing around the corner.

ara let her head fall back against the wall. the ache had dulled— no longer sharp, but still present, sitting heavy in her ribs like leftover thunder. the kind of exhaustion that didn't just pressed on her muscles but wrapped around her bones— deep and slow. her breathing had evened out, but it still felt borrowed, like her lungs weren't fully hers yet. she closed her eyes for a moment, long lashes fanned againist her cheeks, the cool of hallway title seeping through the back of her shirt.

her hands had stopped trembling, they were still resting in her lap like she didn't know what to do with them. her legs awkwardly bent in front of her, shoes pressed against the floor, the posture of someone who hadn't fully decided wether to rest or ride. she was alone again, for a beat. the gazes of the staff who were still checking her out burned under her skin.

and then, slowly— almost without realizing— her fingers moved. one hand reached to the back of her waist, where the mic pack had been jostled loose. her touch was unsure at frist, grazing over the cable and the edge of the elastic strap. she should leave it, she should rest— she'd been told to. everyone would understand. but understanding wasn't the same as forgiving. and rest wasn't same as peace.

she couldn't explain it— not even to herself— but sitting there felt worse than the moment her breath had locked inside her chest. so she adjusted the strap, fitted it more snugly against her skin. her motions were slow, steady, and by the time her fingers clipped her mic back into place, her hands had stopped shaking altogheter.

one deep breath, then another. her knees bent and she lent fowards, palms pressing against the the groud to lift herself— but before she could fully rise, several hands reached out, gasping her arms to steady and support her. she was grateful for their help, for the care they offered in that frantic moment, but a part of her still hated that feeling. their eyes were soft, full of concern— but also laced with something else: pity. and she hated it. the way they looked at her as if she was fragile, broken in a way she didn't want to admit, but even less wanted other to see.

she clenched her jaw and forced a small, tight smile. «i'm fine» she whispered, not quite meeting anyones eyes. taking deep breathes, she adjusted her mic one last time as her eyes flicked toward the stage entrace— bright lights were waiting her. she straightened her shoulders, squaring her jaw and stepped foward.

the distance sound of s.coups voice carried though speakers, delivering a speech to the crowd. that's when ara knew it was the perfect moment, they probably had less than an hour until the end of the concert. every movement she made was measured, as if her mind needed to convince her body was fine, was ready. and with steady steps, she slipped back into the stage, the roaring crowd swallowing her up again.

they immeditely spotted her— minghao caught her eyes and gave her a small, reassuring nod. seungkwan flashed a bright smile, mouthing something she couldn't quite catch. joshua stepped closer, subtly adjusting his stance so her shoulders almost touched. then, with a quiet gentleness, he gave her a soft pat on the shoulder— an uspoken promise she wasn't alone out there, that they in this all toghter. the familiar presence of her members grounded her, giving her the strenght to keep moving foward and finish what she'd started despire everything.

she even caught the suble glance hoshi shot her from across the stage— a fleeting look that carried more weight than words could. his eyes— sharp yet soft, locked into hers for a heartbeat, and a slight, almost reclutant smile tugged at the corner of his lips. it was something only meat for her, a quiet rassurance that wathever storm she was in— he saw her, and he was there.

jeonghan moved through the stage, passing at the back of the members. his movements, meant to look unhurried, hided the ugercy of her steps— he didn't wanted to draw the attention from the udience, especially now as seungkwans voice filled the arena with a gentle speech, but the ugercy to be by her side betrayed him. when he reacher her side, he moved close, closing the gap between them with a quiet, comforting presence. his arms slipped around her waist— firm but tender.

the cool fabric of his jacket brushed lightly against her pale skin, forcing her to ground into the physical world— her head was still fogged. his head leaned gently over her shoulder, silently telling her to lean on him whenever she needed. there were no words between them, the simple contact was enough. ara's breath caught in her throat once again at the contact, a fragile hitch of gratidude and something unspoken swelling within her chest.

slowly, the music began to shift, the subtle hum growing louder as the into of the next song whispered through the spearkers. the members started moving into their positions with praticed precision. ara's legs, still heavy, obeyed instinctively as she adjusted her stance. the lost of contact with jeonghan body, made shivers form down her spine. around her, the others snapped into formation. minghao galanced her way once again, offering a quick nod of encouragement.

she took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a brief moment. it didn't matter how much her chest ached with every move— only forty more minutes. she could endure that.

the final notes of the never ending aju nice echoed though the arena. member scattered around the stage, jumping around while interacting with the cheering crowd. ara's heart pounded in a steady rhythm. they came togheter at the center of the stage, hands linked, bowing deeply to the audience until their figure disappeared.

backstage, the energy was calmer than before, but still far from relaxed. the big smiles they'd held on stage had softened, fading into worried galances exchanged between the member. dino was the frist one to approach ara, his voice low and steady «hey, you holding up okay?» his eyes searched her, trying to understand how much she was really feeling.

she gave a small nod, nothing more— and ofcurse no one was conviced. the movement felt automatic, more like a polite gesture rather than a true answer. joshua stepped closer, his hand gently squeezing her shoulder, a quiet reassurance meant to ground her. his eyes scanned her face carefully, searching for any sign.

s.coups lingered just behind joshua, his brows furrowed in concern, ready to step if needed. «you don't have to push yourself too hard» he said quietly, voice low but still enough to be heard. ara blinked slowly, struggling to steady her breath, but her lips remained pressed into a thin line. she wasn't ready to admit how the episode had shaken her— how close she'd come to losing control.

but despite their concern, no one pressed too hard— not right after everything happened. she was stubborn, her way was to keep fighting through it, no matter how much it costed her.

she sat in front of the same mirror of hours before. it was the same, lights still hars against the glass. her posture was completely different, but it still felt uncomfortable as before— shoulders lower, breath slower and skin paler under the layers of makeup that stubbornly clung into her. she sat in silence as the soft fabric rubs against her skin, the coldness of the make-up remover contrasted with her warm, hot skin.

her fingers moved slowly, dragging the product across her cheeks, forehead and lips. it felt like she was peeling off everything— the adrenaline, the fear, the weight of pushing through. and when the last trace was long gone, she leaned back the chair, eyes fixed on her bare reflection. for a moment, there was only silence, heavy and soft all at once. then, with a quiet sigh, she closed her eyes and she whispered to herself— when it will be over.

[itreds-neurons]

My personal theory with the dialogue choices is that they *are* given by Kris themself, but not willingly- think of it almost like an impulse. They hear Ralsei traumadump to them about being confused as to what they are and what their purpose is, and they want nothing more except to comfort him! …But the impulse is there. The choice to just throw all that away and tell him that he’s right, that he doesn’t matter anyways. Theres nothing that can make that impulse go away, but its alright! They’ll just make sure to not listen to those impulses and choose to do the right thing!… The issue is that’s no longer Kris’ decision to make, though. However, even if they’re at the mercy of whatever one of their choices their puppet strings pick- no matter how deeply they try to bury these choices- they aren’t going to let us get our way with everything without a fight, which is especially prevalent in chapter 4.

Maybe I’m missing something here that tosses this theory out the window, but regardless I think having Kris express themselves through the interpretation of the choices we make for them is a really cool narrative detail that gives us a *teeny tiny* window into who Kris used to be before we came along.

I'm not sure where I stand on various Narrator Theories in Undertale and Deltarune, but Deltarune Chapter 4 did add in a very interesting detail. The SOUL versus Kris sequence in Chapter 4 confirms that the SOUL has no narration on it's own.

The narration stops when Kris tears us out, and the only text we get when we play the SOUL disembodied is dialogue from other characters. Despite being capable of sight and sound, the SOUL cannot 'examine' items and despite being able to move and interact with objects, it does not get it's actions narrated to it.

Whatever is up with the Narration, it is tied to Kris' physical body, not to us.

This is already a great narrative device because it enhances the creepy atmosphere of this sequence by completely robbing us of the familiar source of information and amusement, making everything feel empty and Wrong, but I do also have to wonder about the Implications of it.

[timeslipcamp]

if they DO do the time loop, do you think it'll be the same missions over again? i think it depends on if mc realizes she's in the time loop. because honestly i could see her looking for other missions because she already knows how to play the game so to speak and she could go looking for other ones and that's how they'd spin it

or i could see taiga (slash anyone else who is aware of the time loop) causing different missions to be dealt with since mc already knows how to solve them

like maybe she does wish to "do it all again", ends up back on the train but still gets cursed, and then solves them all SUPER quick so that there has to be new and other missions for them to give us

mostly i just dont want to see that mfer from episode two ever again in my life lmao

[natsswife]

shauna strapman x fem!reader (s3 shauna) bcz u can't tell me this isnt the most hottest, toxic, manipulative, mean lesbian boyfriend coded she looked #needthat

cw: NSFW, mean n jealous shauna ofc, sub!reader, oral sex (r reciving), r is into shaunas toxicity bc why not, just horny hcs that i made on a rush lmao, mari’s kinda into u if u squint enough, maybe just to piss shauna off but i mean it doesnt matter cuz who on earth wont be into you(?

MINORS, CISHET PPL DNI important notes<3: i need her french tip so bad

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆˚ 

༘⋆ she’s mean, i mean after all she has been through, the crash, jackie, her baby, javi, being the butcher even if she didnt want to, you're the only friend she has left, the only one keeping her a little sane (not at all but yeah)

༘⋆ so of course she feels that you need a hard hand so you can stay in your place, without risking your life, worry her, or sometimes spending too much time with mari because if theres something she hates is knowing that mari KNOWS u are her weakness, she cant stand seeing how mari watches u from afar, how she caress your hand slightly and reassured you when u go and vent to her how some chores are annoying asf and she even offers to help you because shauna knows damn well mari is gonna take advantage of that and try to make a move on you.

༘⋆ and she confirms that one day you came to her with a small hand made bouquet of flowers, talking about of a “good friend” Mari is,i that she gifted you this small bouquet bc you got frustrated that everytime you tried to make one it failed

༘⋆ that lead to your first fight, because WHY on earth would you let that moron gift you that when she can make it ten times better, when you know that all u need is told her you need help w something and she's right there helping you, or even better, just doing it herself, she doesn't care because its you after all, besides you were hers and only hers right?!!

༘⋆ she just drags you from your arm to her hut and yells at you what’s your fucking problem and that whatever u have going on with mari ends from that day or shit gonna get worse, you could see how her hands get veiny from the pressure shes putting in them to not try and jump mari and get a time out from nat again, how she starts sweating from the anger, shauna doesnt knows you’re into that..

༘⋆ into seeing her get angry at you, possessive, toxic and overprotective, to treat you like you are her property and hate fuck you, and ofc because you know that’ll help her realease stress, stop being a shit head for some time and a headache for nat and because after that you can get a small glimpse from the old shauna, the affective, sweet one, the one who lets you pamper her after sex, caress her hair, kiss her and lets you be the big spoon because with this small actions you can reassure her that no matter how lower she may fall you’ll always be there for her

༘⋆ so you just shut her with a hungry kiss, because when shauna gets like this you know its gonna be the fuck of your life.

༘⋆ theres no way to get a strap in the wilderness but i know her tongue do the work, the way she pushes you onto her mattress or whatever was the attempt of a bed, kiss you hungrily while unzipping your pants and sliding her hand under your panties

༘⋆ gives you a mocking look when she feels the wetness patch on your underwear. 

“So you enjoy this? enjoy the way you make me mad just so we end up like this”

“I mean, when are you not mad?

༘⋆ how can you not enjoy it? the more jealous and mad she gets the better her finger circles ur clit, rough and desperate, giving you exactly what you want, at least make the jealousy worth it right? 

༘⋆ starts a trail from your neck to your cunt with wet kisses, i know damn well shauna has a perfect tongue work, the way she licks and sucks on your inner lips and entrance like trying to absorb you all, her tongue pushing all the way down with a desperate rhythm making you squirm while your fingers tighten the grip on her hair and your legs closing around her head everytime you see how her brown eyes meets yours giving you a dangerous look that makes you feel your orgasm.

༘⋆ and as soon as she’s done with you comes the second best part that you enjoy the most, being able to hold her, hug her and try and gain a little bit of the old shauna.

༘⋆ she lies next you, no looks, no talk, nothing, the way she always behaves after is how you know she needs reassurance, maybe she feels bad for always treating like that to the point you just accept it, maybe she feels guilty for being the way she is now, whatever the reason you just hold her, hug her and let her sleep on your arms, hoping she knows that no matter how she is to you, you will always be there for her.

ur love for shauna is simply too much to let the weight of her traumas put a toll on your relationship<3

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀˚ ༘♡ ⋆˚

do not translate w/o permission, copy or use for ai training, train your useless brain instead<3

[spookberry]

Do you have MH dolls? Who is your favorite doll? I have a Draculaura and a Casta <3 I love my Casta so much

Im a doll collector actually!!

Bad pics of the collection cuz half my shits perpetually knocked over due to my cats, unfortunately. And these are just the ones on display currently, I also still have all my childhood dolls put away and most my unboxed collector dolls are in storage too.

I have several favorite dolls, but when it comes to monster high my favorite doll is undoubtedly Viperine! Shes the only one of my childhood mh dolls i held onto(the rest I gave to my younger sisters at the time, a choice ive deeply regretted ever since)

My fav skullector is maybe sdcc Circe du Chic Draculaura.

My fav g3 doll is probs a tie between Coffin Break Frankie or any Lagoona Doll. Despite being real early into g3 Coffin Break frankie just has one of the best screenings imo, and idk theres just something so iconic about them I never got over it. And Lagoona is just such a beautiful doll every single time. Not a single flop. I own like three Monster Ball Lagoonas actually, so if i had to pick one it might be that actually lol

[palesweetsdeer]

theres something so addictive about how you draw mountain and i cant explain it 😭😭

maybe possibly perhaps mountain in rut/heat and swiss is slightly scared for his life while dew or phanty pants is practically savivating pretty please

Swiss knows what’s coming. Phantom doesn’t but he sure as hell will find out

[fallen-w1ngs]

I can't express how obsessed I am with your Bucky series omg they scratch the itch in my brain just right. And I know they're all gender neutral but I was wondering if maybe you'd make something with a post-op (recent or long healed) FTM reader? That might be... oddly specific, but I'm just tired of all trans reader content always being so sad :(. I want to see ftm!reader just living his life proud and comfortable :')

|| EEE im super glad you liked my series :)! and duuudee hell yeah ftm reader!! i, myself, am genderfluid and have gone thru a hell of a journey to find that out, idk why im saying this, im js really excited w this !!

'' PRETTY BOY ,,

|| pairing : james "bucky" barnes x ftm!husband!reader

|| warnings : pure fluff, a bit suggestive at the end but that's it

|| wc : 0.8k

The night was young as you wandered through the empty apartment, the one you and Bucky had bought once you both gotten married. It wasn't a big ceremony, not by any means. Only a close friends and family from your side, and some of the Wilsons and Isaiah Bradley from Bucky's invitations.

As the time went on after your wedding, you watched as Bucky grew into being a congressman... Something that did not last long, but you didn't mind. Now, he was a 'New Avenger.' Your stance on the idea wasn't something you wanted to think of right now. With all the craziness that's happened, it's no question why you put off getting top surgery. Money wasn't the biggest issue, Bucky, after being a congressman, offered to pay up the whole thing, though you fought to split it.

However, now him being on a new team and the fact there weren't as much world-ending calamaties in the past few months, you decided to go for it. You've been taking T a long time even before meeting Bucky, so it was no issue.

"Hun?" Bucky's voice cut through the silence as you walked through the halls of your apartment, going down memory lane just for the hell of it. "You still awake?"

"Yeah! I'm here!" You called out as you walked over to the front. Theres where your husband stood, his hair tied half-up half-down, his tactical gear already half off, only a black t shirt and a pair of jeans. His tire blue eyes softening as he sees you and a love-sick puppy dog smile tugged at his lips once he held you in his arms.

"Shouldn't you be laying down, babe?" He asked with a small grin before pressing a kiss to your cheek. "Doctor said you can't exert yourself."

"I'm fine, Buck," You grinned, putting your hands on his chest. "Plus, it's been long enough.. Doc said I could take my bandages off by now"

Bucky raised a brow at your words before grinning. "Wanna take them off now?"

"Why d'you think I stayed up waiting for you instead of sleeping?"

With a chuckle, Bucky led the both of you into your shared bedroom, your white, doe eyed cat Alpine following in suite. Peppering in a few kisses and small updates of how the New Avengers were doing, both you and your husband made it to your bedroom. Standing in front of the tall mirror, you stared at yourself.

"God, I look old." You muttered.

"If you look old, I look ancient."

You shot a playful glare at him. "You don't count, you're 110 yet don't look a day over 30."

"Shut up and just take your shirt off." Bucky grumbled and pushed a kiss against the crook of your neck from behind.

"Someone's eager." You quipped.

"Not like that- Jesus, baby, just lemme see my pretty boy's body?"

Okay, yup, that did it. You smiled and pressed a kiss to the side of his head and tugged your shirt off. Hesitating as you reached for the bandages. Thoughts swirling in your head as you unwrapped yourself, what if it looked bad? What if you hated it? What if it didn't make you feel.. Like you?

But your worries dissipated as you looked to your chest, now flat. Faint scars underneath your pecs, ghosts of the surgery that took place just a few weeks ago. You heard Bucky let out a small exhale as he looked at you placing a soft kiss to your neck.

"There you are, my gorgeous boy." He whispered into your ear. "How do you feel?"

You grinned, your hands reaching up to trace lightly at the scars. It didn't hurt, no it felt.. Good. Your body finally felt like your own, finally something you can look at in the mirror, and instead of cringing and looking away, you can smile.

"Good, really really good."

"Yeah?" Your husband hugged your waist, the contrast of his warm human arm and his cold vibranium one sending a shiver up your back. "Good. 'Cause you look so handsome, baby. God, I love you so much, my pretty boy." You could feel his smile on your bare shoulder.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. You're so good-lookin' it feels like my hearts gonna stop, make me go into cardiac arrest or somethin'. How lucky am I to have such a handsome husband like you?" He said in a hushed tone, peppering kisses into your neck.

Unlike all those times from the past where he'd help you through body dysmorphia, those peppered kisses and the reassurances that you tried to believe.. This time was different. Because you finally felt what he'd been saying. You felt handsome, you felt good. You felt like.. You felt like you.

"Oh, Bucky," You whispered tilting your head ever so slightly to take his lips into yours. "Show me how much you love your husband?"

"With pleasure."

|| i indulged in this sm, ty anon for requesting this <3 i hope this was good enough TEEHEE

[coffinofsweetdeath]

Can you do Boombox or Coil x reader headcannons?

lets get groovin’!

— in which boombox shows you what kind of partner he is. general fluff hcs

cw: possibly ooc, brief mention of alcohol

boombox thought you were cute when he first met you during a phight. the two of you were on opposite teams and he had a bit of a moment when he first saw you. he just kind of froze. it wasn’t until medkit had to yell at him that he snapped out of it and continued the phight as best as he could. he couldn’t focus as well as he normally would have, though. you ended up besting him a few times.

from then on, he tried to serenade you by playing your favorite songs on his boombox. don’t ask him how he knows your favorite songs. as time went on, you slowly learned to appreciate him and his attempts to woo you, even if they weren’t the most conventional attempts. but hey, they worked.

every time during a phight, if the two of you were on opposite teams, he would avoid you completely. would not mention it or acknowledge it. would pretend to not know what you were talking about if asked. if the two of you were on the same team, he prioritizes you with his shields. maybe a bit too much. he has been yelled at a few times by other teammates after some matches for not shielding them.

takes you out on many dates. insists on paying every single time, then complains about how he never has any bux. gets defensive whenever you point that out to him, claiming “someone as pretty as you should never have to pay!”

not really big on giving kisses. will give you quick pecks from time to time, but prefers to lay his head on your lap while listening to you talk about your day or snuggling with you in bed. your voice is the best kind of music to him.

not a good chef. he can microwave a frozen meal or make a sandwich just fine, but do not let his ass near a stove. nearly started a fire once while trying to treat you to dinner, and you have never let him forget it.

very very very cuddly. say goodbye to sleeping by yourself once you guys start living together. he will cling to you in bed like a koala. also a heavy sleeper. might snore a bit.

loves spending time with you. it doesn’t matter what the two of you are doing. as long as its with you, then he’s happy. it could be watching tv, doing chores, running errands, and he’ll be holding your hand happy as a clam the entire time.

if you’re taller than him, you like to make fun of him a little bit. you’ll ask him to grab you something that is just slightly out of his reach. he will roll his eyes and sarcastically grumble “very funny,” when he sees you holding back a giggle. if you’re shorter than him, he revels in it. he was already the shortest phighter before you came in. now that its someone else’s burden to carry, he allows himself to be a little mean with you.

felt like he was going to explode when you first said i love you. he might’ve. that was the best day of his life. you peppered his face in kisses afterwards and he might as well have ascended. he loves you so much. he might just have trouble saying it. he can definitely show it, though.

insists you are the “guest of honor” at every single one of his parties. no matter the occasion. sometimes there is no occasion. but if anyone ever asks, he will happily babble about the guest of honor and how lovely and perfect you are. it gets much worse when theres alcohol involved. he will talk about you for hours if he could.

a very sweet, although a bit inexperienced partner. he means well, and wants nothing but the best for you. and he is going to do his damn best to show that. he has never loved anyone this much his entire life.

went with boombox here, feel free to request again when requests open for coil headcanons!

[palant1r]

something i think that gets missed in discussion about male privilege and who benefits from it is that male privilege is modular with a lot of moving parts. there isn't some massive Male Privilege Monolith of benefits that gets conferred upon you the minute you pass as a man to broader society. it's a bunch of tiny things that all add up, and i'd wager theres no singular person in the world that benefits from male privilege in its theoretical entirety. and even those privileges individually have very conditional access. like

-a woman with a masculine name may experience the male privilege of being taken seriously by default when communicating over email — but that privilege will likely be lessened if that name is obviously nonwhite

-it is male privilege that has caused safety gear and infrastructure over the centuries to privilege the typical male body type, but men falling outside that body type norm will not fully benefit from these designs

-the most passingest trans man who's had every surgery and passes perfectly and uses his masculinity to be a dick to all the women in his life is still going to suffer from decades of medical science not properly investigating disorders/diseases that primarily affect those with estrogen-dominant immune systems/born with a vulva and uterus

-....and even a cis man suffering medical problems won't be able to access full male privilege in the medical field because our society is shit to disabled people

-white men will have access to the male privilege of police officers and the legal system overlooking their abuse of women. men of color will not have full access to the same privilege, especially if the victim is white

-the same trans person might pass to one group and not pass to another depending on how they're presenting that day and how it interfaces with that group's understanding of gender. this will affect how they're treated by those groups.

like, just take me as an example. i pass in some groups but not to others. i use a masculine name over email, which is how i make first contact with a lot of people, so they first think i'm a man and then am introduced to someone who is Not Quite A Man or maybe doesn't pass for transgender at all. i have a genetic predisposition towards diseases of the uterus/breasts, and live within a medical system that, because of misogyny/transphobia, restricts my access to many of the treatments/transition surgeries i may want. however, a doctor with whom i hide my AGAB or who sees me as a man at first sight may take my concerns more seriously. do i "have" male privilege? bit of a nonsensical question. male privilege is not a one size fits all tag that someone either Has or Doesn't it's a massive set of situational injustices

[lostandfem]

yeah it makes them think "wait if it was wrong for them, maybe it's wrong for me too" and that terrifies the fuck outta them

and thats because the identity is a safety net, a lifeline. an attempt for desperate people to get rid of themselves and replace themselves with someone new becuase they cant stand being who they are anymore. aside from others trying to convince you you'll off yourself if you dont transition, it might really genuinely feel that way if you believe its your only shot at happiness. they might really be at risk of it, not because they have a gender, but because they are genuinely in that much pain. seeing it not work for someone is a very potent threat to the constructs that keep them from having to face mental health issues that they do not have any resources to deal with

gender is an escape. even the ones who get into it through yaoi are escaping, because addiction is just avoidance

so why then dont we let them transition? if it helps?

thats the thing, it almost never actually does. it keeps you stable in brief moments, but the moment anything shatters that illusion even for a second, your world falls apart. thats why misgendering feels so horrible to them. its not directly 'gender dysphoria' in the way we usually think about it; its a brief look back into the reality theyre trying to avoid. I think of it in my head like being in stasis, or a time capsule, or cryogenically frozen. something like that. it keeps you sheltered as long as nothing breaches the perimeter, but nothing heals while youre inside of it. you are stuck, avoiding avoiding avoiding. figuratively swallowing painkillers for a broken leg that needs to be set back in place. theres something else that needs to be fixed, but they wont let us talk about it. nothing can pop that safety bubble

[sha-brytols]

theres a lot about the last straw i like to think about with esther because this was actually like literally the lowest point of her life bar none. you thought leandra's death was bad ohhhhhhh boy. the funny hilarious thing about esther is that like. sometime into anders moving in and their relationship becoming increasingly more domestic and serious, she ends up developing a codependency on anders that rivals anders' codependency on HER. and she doesn't ever realize it because they're always together so there's nothing really for her to realize until they're apart.

and like there WAS a period of time where anders ran away (not long after making esther distract the cleric) and esther lost her MIND about it i talked about it here teehee but when that happened esther had like. some degree of control over the situation and was able to go after him and get him back and it was all fine.

but in this case? here? there is no control. everything is on fire. in the span of like 30 minutes her entire world crumbled into a nightmare. the grand cleric assassinated, mages dead in the streets, sebastian swearing vengeance on her and the city, the chantry in flames. what happened to her home? orana? bodahn and sandal? apawstate? its all so much all at once and she can't handle it. and worst of all her emotional support apostate is gone because she almost did something she would never be able to forgive herself for.

so ❤️ esther hawke last straw cringe compilation:

almost went through with killing anders. isabela stopped her mid-kill. the blade was inches from his neck. isabela told him to get lost so they can sort themselves out later. anders ran away.

murdered orsino in cold blood in front of like a dozen frightened mages. he confessed to covering for quentin in the interest of keeping his mages protected. bad move in front of the daughter of one of his victims. especially when she's already in a weird place mentally . she did it with her bare hands too it was great. not for orsino i mean. or the mages who saw it. or even really esther. anyways

meredith fight. everyone on their last legs. esther realizes for the first time Oh We Might All Actually Die Here. remembers what happened to her during the arishok duel and decides to do that but On Purpose. like. lol. you know.

but it turns out getting impaled by a red lyrium sword has a really weird effect on your blood. she goes into a blood frenzy but THIS one has the scary glowing red eyes like in her gameplay frenzy and she's a little out of control of her body and her brain. probably also killed a couple templars that were on THEIR side because she couldn't tell friend from foe and had to be pinned down and knocked out by fenris to get her to stop. "how did the lyrium not kill her" don't worry about it. reaver thing. probably. idk.

the last cutscene also didnt go like that at all cullen didnt let her go quietly he tried to arrest her but she was. still in her Mood. and she tried to attack him. fenris practically tackled her to the ground and knocked her unconscious. cullen was like. ok yeah maybe this isn't a great time. just get out of here.

she did reunite with anders like immediately after the party fled from kirkwall because she was literally dying (again) and no one could heal her and anders popped up right in the nick of time and stabilized her. it was a really weird night for everyone involved. isabela might have gone looking for him or he just showed up who knows.

it's actually very important to me that the tale of the champion and the story that varric tells cassandra are two completely different things. the former is an embellished and glorified version of what happened to a woman who never asked for any of what was given to her and who did not deserve to have her name dragged through the mud for trying to live her life. the latter is the brutally honest recount of how a messy, angry, bitter woman was put in impossible situation after impossible situation and came out of it a shell of what she used to be. so cassandra's the only one in the entirety of thedas (who wasn't Actually There i mean) who actually knows who Hawke is. not the Champion.

buuuut i say this because. at the end of the day, varric wasn't telling esther's story. he was telling hawke's story. and hawke was always the person he wanted her to be. so a lot of it is still heavily embellished, but for the most part not intentionally. untiiiiiiil the last straw, where quite literally everything that varric says to cassandra is bullshit LOL. hawke chose to protect the innocent at all costs. hawke was forced to kill a mad blood mage in self defense. hawke fought with everything she had and never lost hope. hawke the hero who always did the right thing. and anders was the manipulative bastard that took advantage of her devotion to him and destroyed her life in the process, but hawke still loved and forgave him. because that's how good of a person she was. lol.

[theoneandonlysourcandy]

⋆˚࿔ Romanced!Sinclaire x reader 𝜗𝜚

SPOILERS FOR SINCLAIRES LOVE ROUTE!!

╰┈➤ Content warnings: None i think

Request: no

♡ author note: writing this because the only person writing sinclaire x reader is my friend @penpalll and they need help characterizing romanced sinclaire + i wanna contribute to the other losers who wanna bang him as well. i might write overdosed sinclaire headcanons at some point we’ll see. Uhm uhm these kinda suck since (from where i’m at in the game) there’s not much to go off of for his not crazy personality so just like bare with me

( ˶ˆᗜˆ˵ )

🧼 - Literally the best boyfriend/husband whatever relationship status ever.

🧼 - So gentlemanly, he holds the door open for you, pulls your chair out, would give you a kiss on the back of your hand every time he had to leave you for more than 5 seconds if he actually could-

🧼 - Not really a relationship headcanon but i can literally HEAR him saying “Oh! That’s not..” i just had to get that thought out there

🧼 - Loves to just. . Have you near. You don’t even have to talk or anything, just having you close by already makes him really happy. Speaking of talking, he loves talking about pretty much anything with you. Just talking about your days, maybe some gossip around the house-He’s not one to share gossip, so that’s pretty much just you, if you like too.

🧼 - I’m pretty sure that people aren’t trapped in the room their object is in or something like that, since maggie can go around the house with you investigating people, and teddy can go to your room on his own, i’m saying this because i know there’s some other people out there thinking about what they do if you gotta go to the bathroom or shower or something-And if they are stuck in that room, don’t worry, he looks away every time, he’s a respectful man

🧼 - i never thought i’d be sitting here writing about wether or not a humanoid sink would be forced to watch you poop but here we are

🧼 - Whenever he gets really excited or flustered, his faucet will turn on and spray water everywhere. He apologizes SO much every time and feels really bad about it, and helps you clean up the water he accidentally just. Sprayed all over your floor,

🧼 - Pretty big on hygiene, he gifted you a little hand sanitizer thingy you could keep in your bag or your pocket once.

🧼 - He thinks about you a lot, and is pretty observant of things. The way your hands move when you talk, wether or not they move or don’t. How adorable your laugh is, even if you may be embarrassed by it. They way you-Oh gosh, he’s got water everywhere now.

🧼 - Seeings you carrying something heavy, goes “Allow me, darling.” and proceeds to trip while walking with it.

yeah these were short but THERES VERY VERY LITTLE TO GO OFF OF (where i’m at) OKAY.

[crypticferns]

well time for like 1-2 more two time headcanons (at this point it isnt even headcanons its just me making an au and describing certain scenes)

first time two time got to learn what a hospital or doctors office was (via having to go to one) they did not have a fun experience

first ever doctors appointment two time has to go to was eventful to say the least. since they had basically no medical history and no one knew if they had allergies or things already done

since two time lived in the cult (one that didnt interact with the outside world like at all) they were behind on things like vaccines. and so come the fateful day of two time learning they really dont like needles

elliot got to experience first hand what two time will do to get away from something they dont like (two time where did the knife come from your scaring us)

first time two time went to a hospital (this mf dont eat enough and almost died) they were not excited to say the least. this was one of the first times they interacted with the outside world

two time was brought there after elliot found them half dead in the woods. they were not happy with it in the slightest (they wanted to pay for their sins and finally join azure and be free from the eternal suffering that is living without him)

the hospital got the fun of finally getting two time in the system and learning they are, in fact, very violent when subjected to help with things they dont know of

the cult almost never used things like metals, usually using thorns and vines and making most things from clay and wood

metals were reserved for the elders, the people who were pure and never disobeyed the spawn even once. the metals were used as recognition for who the spawn deemed worthy

two time was going to be deemed worthy after killing azure, but no one knew where they went after finding azures body. they were in eternal torture (or as eternal as it gets since they escaped)

anyways thats all. uhhhhhhhhh someone make like any azuretime / pizzatime fanfic centering around two time and not being super angsty and i will personally become your maid

im desperate if you cant tell. while theres a bunch of azuretime fics theres like no pizzatime fics that center around two time. specifically angsty two time centric (not like super angsty like hurt no comfort i cant handle that</3)

anyways enjoy the headcanons. actually at this point its an au enjoy the au there will be more soon (maybe ill actually start writing again instead of drawing and then abandoning said drawings)

[itissadbutitsmy-artblog]

I was wondering whether you have any thoughts on what an outsider's perspective on the candy kingdom would be? Are the vibes off if you're a traveling merchant stopping by? Whats pb's reputation like internationally etc. ?

YOU GAVE ME A THINKER. POLOGIES IN ADVANCE.

okay so 1: i know people can come in. there's a train station :) at first i thought No one comes in but then i rememebred there's a train

anyways i think that candy people.. like. .. their two main character traits are "overly friendly and welcoming" and "high strung and tense" so depending on what happens youll have very different experience. whether the shopkeep you visit is just chilling or whether you run into some really excitable guys who want to hug you and rub their faces on yours just because you seem nice really depends on like. the weather.

but like. something that keeps getting to me is theres so much of the candy kingdom. there's the little close-to-the-castle bit, the folks that we see at all the princess's parties, that you sorta think of when you think of The Candy Kingdom. the goofy guys who dont seem to have jobs except maybe being castle staff who, again, dont do much. they just sorta idle around and follow their own fancy.

but there's also, like, apartment buildings, and the train station. there's restaurants. there are telemarketers and lawyers. a pharmacy! and a hotel! everyone who we see who lives and works outside of the little castle vicinity seems to have a much more recognizable life. there's a town.

they have a job they go to regularly (root beer guy and cherry cream soda, their coworkers, the pizza sassy's employees, the hotel staff, daycare workers, teachers, pharmacists (ANN MY GOAT)...). they have houses. there's the tavern area, too! which, once distant lands and fionna and cake comes around, has cleaned up considerably and become a nice place for everyone to hang out!

so. lots more to the kingdom than just the goofy dance party cast that we usually see. now. what would you see if you just wandered in. i mean besides the skeleton arm in the sewer there. hello?

i mean first off some weird ass business is probably going down and youre going to have to nip into a shop and be like dude.... did twenty people who all look the same just run past chased by twenty people who also look the same.. and the shopkeep will have to be like ohh yeah i dunno about all that i just heard the princess was really pissed off. shes sitting on the wall with finn and jake if you need her. do you wanna buy a broom. pb has her hands in the politics of everyone else, and finn and jake hang out there. things just HAPPEN in the candy kingdom. there's always something or other going on.

honestly. i wrote a lot. but go back and watch davey? that's how it's like to walk into the candy kingdom as a stranger i think. finn treats it a little different because he's lived there his whole life and never needed to pay for services there, none of this is weird for him it's just weird that no one is greeting him, but that's what it's like. there's three guys just holding an impromptu dance party on the street and when you stop to watch them from 2 inches away they do not stop or react. when you steal someone's goods they yell at you quite matter of factly and hold no apparent ill will towards you when you seem apologetic and give it back, even though you can't pay for it. when you slam into the store and ask for a job they just give you one. they know your name by the end of the day and say goodbye warmly. on the surface it's not weird. it's just kind of vacant in some levels and it's overly friendly on others.

the goofy-party-city-guys-that-you-think-of-when-you-think-of-the-candy-kingdom, that seems to be the part of the candy kingdom pb is most interested in maintaining. we Know she is opposed to the CK becoming a citylike attraction for visitors. (or at least, gumbald really wanted it to become that. and she just wanted to hang out with him instead. and once he became dance party central, she was like, this is good. dance for me. let's all dance forever)

that's what she focuses on most. those are the people she hangs out with. those are the people she watches like a hawk. those are the people she brings to her parties. the goofy party guys. not the people with jobs and houses and kids. cinnamon bun was a goofy party guy and he was trusted with important jobs, but she also knew what he did in the privacy of his own home and she made him change it. james was a Job Guy and he got to hoard men in his house unchecked until she decided to let him die and that's when she found out. there's like a split in where her focal point of What The Candy Kingdom Is is aimed. i mean. look at this. place. not maintained. it's not where all the Jobs Guys live, but it's not where her party people live.

so folks living outside the kingdom probably think of the candy kingdom, and think about the goofy party guys, and don't even realize theres a whole town in there fully formed, writing prescriptions, traversing career changes. that's what pb puts forward as what her kingdom's all about. dance party. sweet happy joy joy. as you saw she's definitely not maintaining the tavern area (OR HELPING THE FOLKS LIVING THERE. BABY BOOKING THE MARSHMALLOW KIDS? DUDE.) but honestly the rest of the non-party town doesnt seem much better if root beer guy (and his coworkers) and james's mental states are anything to go by. their houses are nice they have good jobs but they're depressed and theyre bored.

theyre still candy people, any of them have the capacity to go into a goofball flip out over something unimportant, i mean peppermint butler is the straightman and he says some of the most insane off the cuff things out of any of the cast. root beer guy talks like a calmguy and he still jumps up and down when hes overexcited. he walks straight through bushes. literally all of them will calmly accept wild ass things like some panicked regent grabbing them and sticking them in their mouth to suck on with no complaint, that's just life in the candy kingdom for you (theres a delicate balance between What Scares Them and What Is Mildly Ruffling But Whatever. peps used to LOVE getting scattered all over everywhere.). if pb is to be believed literally all of them need cuddles and soft touches to survive. and everyone's so lonely. they might be calm and normal folks with jobs when you meet them but then they're also just so casually touchy and warm and if some horrible thing happened they'd be so surprisingly efficient about it. third time their life has been endangered this week, dude, let's head out the back way, there's a safe meeting space behind the fire escape.

there probably is something off about a bunch of really, freakishly friendly guys who act like the whole world is going to end any second now. there's this undercurrent of "aw, man, mom's gonna KILL me" to everything they do that's very weird for a bunch of guys who were openly made in a laboratory and probably don't have a mother or a childhood to speak of. and also just world-ending terror in general. they're so scared. especially the ones pb coddles. but i've also seen them step up when the chips are down, scared as hell.

candy people are nothing if not loyal to the end and i think passing merchants and visitors would get none of that. theyd just get this bad first impression from too many people smiling too vacantly at them. Smiling too much and being so, so mundanely normal. that, or theyd accidentally forge a deathly serious lifelong friendship with some taffy guy who tripped over them just because the clouds were in the right position or something

like they seem so painfully normal to me but if you interact with them more than a minute or two, or if youre going through the whole town and not just popping in, buying a chocolate bird, and leaving, you're going to get that "why are all of them smiling the same way" thing. why are all of them skittish. even the ones who are heading off to work. the ones with kids. why are they looking at you like. that.

candy people do like. explode when theyre confused or freaked out but like. theyre also wildly easygoing. this is the "i need a job" "can ya sweep brooms" city. this is the city that had two zombie outbreaks in the last five years and not all of its citizens exploded from fear about it before getting turned. this is the city that just decided to oust their goddess mother from her throne because a con man said it was cool to do it. i think nothing phases them. i feel like theyd freak if a non-candy person wandered in but then i rewatch like, davey, and they just dont care. so no matter what YOU the visitor thought, THEY would treat you as calmly or overly-lovingly as their fancy took them

now

whats pb like internationally. i mean. it varies! right! i think she's gotta be overall respected. the wizards LOVE her and she does NOT respect them at ALL. she needed to buy something from their city, KNEW that she had a good political relationship with them, and instead of just like, asking, she snuck in which is forbidden on several levels, and when they said that's ok because we like you but you do have to perform some contrition, she yelled at their leader that their entire culture was built on flawed pretenses and every single practitioner of their beliefs was stupid. like OK. i dont think they like her anymore. halfway convinced the real reason peps is blocked from wizard city is because he spent so much time trying to liaison with them after that debacle and he flubbed it somehow. anyways. and phoebe! phoebe HATES her! but she still tries to meet her professionally every time. and every time, pb lies to her and undermines her. i know she's Trying to be Better. but we don't see that part. it's very tasty! im SURE phoebe isn't the only one in that position with her, even if she is the only one getting through to her about the surveillance getting out of hand! im SURE the wizards aren't the only society she has openly snubbed in such a way.

she seems to be very much in the Center during events like the meeting of ooo royalty and the tart meeting and stuff. mainly because finn's there doing something and she has to stand up and be like FINN! LET ME EXPLAIN! because he's her knight the main character. i get the feeling especially early on that she's The princess, and i know it's because it was early and she was the only one that was really around, but it's kinda nice how that frames her as The Princess to Finn. she's His Princess. and it circles out over time as he circles away from his singular focus of loyalty; his heroics are focused on Slaying Evil Everywhere, not on Protecting This One Princess, much as pb expected otherwise when she signed him on. um. i'm sidetracked but it also means that, because of her focus within finn's point of view, i ended up seeing her as Very Influential among the royals of ooo -- maybe the first princess who really came into power, or maybe she was careful with her treaties so she came out on top most often. she has a brother to protect, after all, a brother she can't move. i think coming at the politics aggressively early on, when everything was resettling after the war and the loss of the dominant species, so that her territory and her assets are protected ironclad, probably came off bad at first

(are these outfits similar. they feel so similar to me. her shoko outfit and her apparent warrior tendencies back then and the way banana guard 16 describes her in one shot of her standing on a dozen defeated enemies)

..but now, it just means she's an Established princess, a Rock. someone who is Always There. Dependable, like taxes, not necessarily safe nor dangerous, but yeah, she has a trade relationship with us, and we don't get to keep our most valuable materials, but we don't lose anything we need to keep going. that's pb in politics to me. umm. h

ok that was too much i think i lost track of your question lots of times but i kept wanting to talk about candy people ahehe.

ok i meant to just queue this but i wrote a bunch of tags i'll just throw here then i'll stop talking:

i REALLY Like the writing of pb as THE princess. and how its just because finns the protagonist. and shes established early on. it has such a fun narrative implication, it's fun from a writing perspective because she's always THERE and always at the CENTER of everything. is she really? maybe?? but maybe breakfast princess is just as intricately political as her and we just dont know. cuz all we ever see is pb screaming that everything will DIE if we dont do things her way bc shes the one who figured it out and etc. other similar things she does that makes it feel like well maybe shes the smartest maybe shes the most involved maybe... but idk if she really is! she might just be FINNS princess and also very nosy so shes always onscreen and in everyones business! incredible writing.

[robertisbisexual]

Personally a very big fan of the concept of Robert knowing he could pull anyone he wanted and that objectively he still enjoys that but knowing that none of them, male or female, compare to how he feels about and how aaron makes him feel.

Robert knowing he could kiss or fuck half the world's population and it wouldn't have 1% of the spark he and Aaron have and knowing that's what he wants, that's the end all be all for him.

Knowing that he could have something, maybe even has something briefly, but ultimately never wanting to settle for less than his soulmate when it comes down to it.

He knows theres other options, he's had them, he can have more of them. Yes he could love someone, probably, conceptually, but none of them hit like Aaron and Aaron is who he wants.

Good stuff.