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#maybe this could be my opportunity to learn
olderthannetfic · 3 days
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No, ppl, VPNs aren't even possible for many MANY ppl in the third world. You can't buy a VPN in a brick and mortar store, and many of us (adults who are parents of kids in schools and everything) don't even own credit cards. Many who do still cannot afford VPN because what is easily affordable to a Westerner could pay my bills for a whole month. It depends on how poorly my currency is performing against the US dollar.
Even Paypal is sth mythical. I mean, I've had pieces accepted in US magazines for what the editors said was a token payment, about 50 dollars. Man, those 50 dollars would've paid off so much! That would be a FORTUNE. But I had to waive the payment EVERY time because Paypal doesn't work in my country. Grrr.
That doesn't mean third world countries listed on the Paypal site can use it either. My country is on it but every time I filled surveys etc and they transferred the money, I couldn't get my bank to let me have it. I know a third worlder in another country who has had that happen to them too.
My heart goes out to fellow readers and writers in Malaysia. Some of the most mindblowingly beautiful fics I've ever read (they were gushed abt by Americans and Brits and Aussies so I assumed the writers were native English speakers) turned out to have been written by fellow third worlders, one of those in my own country! The idea of waking up to find my country decided to ban ao3 is just... unbearable.
I hope the Malaysians find a way around it. And I hope whoever made that horrible decision gets the worst RPF written abt them AND hears about it from their political rival.
--
Yeah, I'm always meeting fans online from certain countries: Malaysia, Indonesia, the Philippines. Some places just seem to produce a lot of nerds. Or maybe more people learn English? IDK. Both a lack of (popular-with-fans) local media and a lack of economic opportunity can incentivize foreign language learning, so I'm sure that's part of it along with a certain amount of randomness.
In any case, part of why AO3 is run on donations instead of having paid accounts with better features is that a lot of core fans who write the fic and make the recslists and make fandom happen turn out to be in situations where they literally cannot pay even if they have the money.
Someone who's popular might be able to get foreign friends to pay for their VPN, but even then, can they actually get access to it? Questionable.
As for the last, it will be with their political rival, and you know it! They'll have to hear from some aide. ;D
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anotherocean · 3 days
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THE SEED IN YOUR SOUL:
This reading is about a dream your soul has for you. This is my second PAC reading and it's like a compass for your soul-- something you deeply desire, something that is already occurring on some level, and something that has seeds within you already. Please feel free to pick more than one pile, or pick them all, or just pick one. This is meant to be a glance at something essential inside you that popped out at me, and some advice moving forward toward a more complete realization of it. Please let me know if you found this helpful or if it resonated! :)
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PILE I. You are so beautiful to me Pile 1, and your life is abundant with riches. There is SO MUCH peace here. You can finally rest. The energy I see is you on a tropical island swinging in a hammock without a care in the world. You are allowed to take life as slowly as you want. You really appreciate the sensuality of things. Really truly. That’s what makes you rich. The abundance spills forth from there, and you have the money to cover all the basics (and more) without worry. You even have enough money to take care of your loved ones it seems, which is something that matters to you. You want to share so much of what you have, and that's part of what makes you feel rich too. You’ve carved out a gorgeous life for yourself, and that life is just for you. It doesn’t look like a life that anyone has ever seen before. It’s fully YOURS... you invented it! If the word “mine” isn’t your guiding word, it should be. You are learning about all the things that are yours, and it makes you truly rich. You can live your life in secret if you want. Or you can live it very loud and big. There is a duality to you. Somehow your legacy in life is both very small and very huge. You live both a very secret life, and a very public one. You acquaint yourself with the riches of the world and live in true luxury, as personally defined by you.
Advice: You’re coming off of a really hard time it looks like. Recognize the difficulties you’ve been through. Honor them. Address concerns you have about security and how that may be holding you back. Security is your birthright, but it is a state you can feel without obsessively pursuing it and valuing it above all else. RELEASE your regrets for how you wish things could have been. People and situations are flawed. We are flawed. Life doesn’t always take the twists and turns we like, and it’s your time to move on. It’s time to step away from those things and embrace your confidence, your fire, your passion. Aim to complete what you’ve started and begin afresh. It’s the end of a cycle and the beginning of a glorious new one. You are headed for exciting new opportunities and the feeling of inspiration is just around the corner.
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PILE II.
My graceful and gorgeous pile 2. Letting your body be completely free makes you really happy, and this is something you feel allowed to do privately.  You are utterly unique and solitude just allows you to stretch out into that.  You loooooooove to be alone, and it is a truly gorgeous thing.  I think a lot of the time solitude gets a bad rap, but this pile is all about the gorgeousness that comes from really getting to enjoy your own company, and the world around you.  You are EXTREMELY sensual and I mean sensual with a capital SSSSSS.  Your greatest joy is pure quiet, and the sounds of nature.  From this place of solitude, and a deep knowing, you find absolute and utter, tranquility.  Maybe this is a pile that has experienced pain or trauma or power struggles but that is all over.  It’s like all the nature you’ve surrounded yourself with has just sucked it out of you completely.  Your body is going to take over.  I keep getting that this is maybe a scary thing, but it shouldn’t be.  You are 100% aligned with something holy.  Deep down I think you know this.  Anyway, the divine will wash over you.  Just say thanks, or say nothing at all, and melt.  You are here for this kind of bliss. You are absolutely absorbed into a spirituality that many people would die to experience just a fraction of.  You are existing on other wavelengths entirely, and what a stunning thing that is.
Advice: You’re undergoing a massive transformation.  Embrace the upheaval you are going through.  Move away from rigid thinking (“this is the way it should be”).  Rules and adherence to rules are not your friend right now.  You will still want to use your mind to think clearly, but be playful and inquisitive as you do it.  Ask a lot of questions and be curious.  Understand too, that emotional pain may be part of the process toward what you most want right now, and that is okay, it will only make your heart stronger and you more beautiful.  Let joy, friends, community and camaraderie lift you up and be part of your healing process.
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PILE III
Right away I get the glory of good food!  Of nourishment!  This is just the surface.  You have absolutely incredible, deep-in-your-body physical confidence.  You are an athlete, a chef, someone whose whole world depends on their body.  Still, you are going to the gym, making the smoothies, swimming, dancing, your world is revolving around your physical self.  You get massages.  In a sense you are free to worship yourself.  You are free to worship your world.  Judgements from other people (and there are some) only thrill you, and you might even enjoy the fiery friction.  Sexuality is a part of your life, and it’s tied to your creativity.  You are of the body, by the body and for the body.  You get the pleasure of standing up for what you believe in.  You are some kind of star.  Something old-fashioned even.  Or there is something about the way you live that is old fashioned.  Or your notoriety (fame?) is old fashioned somehow… You are my most musical pile.
Advice:  You are setting out on a brand new adventure right now—how thrilling.  I can feel the potential and excitement.  You are a bit concerned about the long term stability of your plan and it’s holding you back a bit.  There is some hesitation, and it might be hindering your progress.  Don’t be so conservative right now, but also don’t be reckless.  There is a bit of a push-pull between a conservative approach, and a devil may care attitude.  Balance your enthusiasm with steady and thoughtful planning.  Above all else, embrace collaboration and teamwork.  Recognize the importance of collective efforts.  I promise that even if this does not relate directly to your goals, that peripheral collaborations will still help you.  Learn from people around you.  My other word of advice is take time to rest and recollect.  Be diligent, responsible and practical and be in it for the long haul.  There is stability in that alone, which should give you some comfort.  Practicality without conservatism will do you a world of good right now as you set out on your exciting new path.
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PILE IV
You are a traveler down to the deepest parts of yourself.  You see the world and different people in the world, and make connections everywhere you go.  You rush hurriedly from one flight to another, and then you find yourself somewhere exotic and your world gets bigger and your whole mind expands.  It’s like the drapes were drawn in your living room for your whole life and now you’ve finally opened them letting light stream in, and even the windows are open and fresh air is finally getting inside.  You see so many things.  Greatest mountains, other oceans, animals and flora and fauna of other worlds.  In a sense you are like an alien walking on earth and just want to see as much of it as possible before you have to leave.  You are so free.  You step so lightly in this world, and with so much joy.  You go to cafes you’ve never been to, shops you’ve never been to, temples and fragrant forests where the caterpillars are huge and orange and you reach out and touch one out of curiosity.  You are a true citizen of the world, and deeply connected to humanity.  Your travels do not alienate you, they deepen your roots to Earth and connect you with your global family.  
Advice: You are on a new path, perhaps related to the material world or financial comforts.  There are real tangible beginnings now.  What’s holding you back are indecision and possibly procrastination.  Let go of indecision and avoiding the task at hand.  Make a decision and move forward with it… at some point in the future it might be appropriate to make adjustments, but not right now.  Right now you must embrace your vision and your confidence.  Be bold!!!!!!!!!  You might encounter worry, fear, anxiety but face it head on.  Don’t try to deny or hide away.  See the fear for what it is and have a direct confrontation with it (sometimes this is the war in our mind).  Persevere and value your resilience.  Say thank you to yourself for it.
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I hope you enjoyed this reading! I may eventually do paid services if people want additional info or clarifying questions. Very grateful to help and hope some of this information resonated with you. I had fun doing it and the hours slipped away. Put in my inbox or in comments if you want to see me focus on a specific reading.
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rottenpumpkin13 · 19 hours
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how's Father's Day going for the boys?
Not well.
-
Sephiroth stared at the screen, his eyes drawn to the email from Professor Hojo.
Subject: Happy Father's Day
Dearest Sephiroth,
Today marks an opportunity to contemplate the pivotal role fathers play in shaping the lives of their offspring. Beyond providing, a father’s duty encompasses the profound responsibility of guiding and molding their offspring into exceptional individuals. Sons, especially, should acknowledge the sacrifices and wisdom imparted by their paternal figures, appreciating the path laid before them and aspiring to surpass their achievements.
Remember, that as you progress and excel every success reflects the foundation established by paternal influence. Let today remind you of that.
Cordially,
Professor Hojo
“—displaying behavior that sours your image to the public,” Genesis quoted, followed by a scoff. “As if attending a pride parade is the worst thing I could do.” He rolled his chair over the extension cord attached to Sephiroth's computer rhythmically, as if the sound would be enough to drown out the memory of the conversation he just had with his father over the phone.
Every roll of the wheel dug into Angeal's skull, intensifying his headache. He groaned, but doubted they could hear it—not Genesis over the sound of his own voice or Sephiroth over his typing.
Sephiroth hummed critically. “Are you sure it wasn’t about the scandalous activity you were caught up in during the parade? What was it again, the impromptu dance-off on the float?”
Genesis huffed. “It was a celebration, Sephiroth, not a scandal. And I wasn’t caught up in anything scandalous. Just because I have a bit more fun than you doesn’t mean I’m tarnishing our image.”
Sephiroth stopped typing, a beat, then: “Whatever you say—though I think using that man as a dancing pole was a bit much.”
“Jealousy, jealousy,” Genesis sing-songed mockingly.
The typing persisted, as did Genesis rolling around on the chair. Angeal groaned again, stretching out and closing his eyes. “You two sound like an old married couple,” he muttered.
“We are, at most, divorced,” Sephiroth remarked dryly.
“You started it,” Genesis pointed out.
“Just making sure you know how to manage your reputation."
Genesis rolled his eyes dramatically before rolling behind the couch, also dramatically. “If being boring like you was anything to go by I'm sure my reputation would be squeaky clean.”
Angeal finally squeezed his eyes open just in time to catch Genesis roll by in a flash of red. “It’s Father’s Day, Gen. I’m sure your father was just worried. Maybe try seeing it from his perspective.”
Genesis started spinning, and from his peripheral view Angeal was certain he would fall over at any moment.
“You know better than anyone that I've been trying to do that all my life. It’s just... I wish he’d understand that I’m just being me.” he stopped spinning and planted his feet on the ground.
"At least our relationship has gotten better over time.” He looked up to meet Sephiroth’s curious eyes. “It used to be worse,” he clarified.
Sephiroth continued typing rapidly even as he nodded. "You know, there’s a study that shows people’s relationships with their parents tend to improve with age."
Genesis scoffed, raising an eyebrow. "Is that the case for you? With Professor Hojo?"
Sephiroth laughed dryly. "Yes, it is. I’ve learned to ignore him much better with age."
Angeal didn't match the laughter they fell into. He brought his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around them, making himself as small as possible.
From a distance, anyone glancing his way would see nothing more than a huddled ball on the couch.
He huffed before digging his mouth into his arm. “At least they're alive,” he mumbled.
The sound of Sephiroth's typing stopped. Genesis’ office chair ceased its rolling, and the silence that followed was enough to make Angeal bite his tongue.
Genesis’ forced laugh caught him off guard. “Would you like a medal for that?”
Sephiroth spun around in his own chair. “That’s enough, Genesis.”
“Why? It’s true.” Genesis was looking at him now, Angeal could feel it. “You think Sephiroth wouldn’t trade his abusive father for a dead, good father?”
“You’re being insensitive,” Seph warned.
“Oh, am I?” Genesis shot back, standing up from his chair. “Maybe you’re the one who doesn’t understand. I’m tired of everyone walking on eggshells around this topic. We all have our issues with our fathers. No one gets to win the trauma olympics just because theirs are dead.”
Angeal slowly unfurled himself, sitting up to level Gen's glare. “Losing a parent isn’t something you can just brush off. I'm not saying I have it worse just because—”
“And living with a parent who doesn’t give a damn about you is any better?” Genesis’s voice was sharp, his eyes blazing as he swiftly cut him off. “At least you can remember your father fondly. At least you have good memories, old friend.”
Sephiroth stepped between them, his voice cold. “This isn’t helping anyone. Enough. This isn’t how we solve things.”
Genesis scoffed, his anger still simmering as he turned to Seph. “You’re one to talk about solving things, Sephiroth. You’ve never faced your issues head-on. You just ignore them and hope they go away.”
Sephiroth didn't bite, and Angeal would've commended him for it had he not wished Sephiroth would slap Genesis. “I deal with my issues in my own way. This isn’t about me. It’s about respecting each other’s pain.”
Angeal finally snapped. “Easy for you to say,” he stood up to look Sephiroth in the eye, “First thing out of my mouth when I saw you this morning was asking how you were feeling.”
He whirled around to meet Genesis, and from the way his friend looked at him, he could tell Genesis had gotten used to Angeal's silence. “And I told you that you didn't have to call your father if you didn't feel ready to, but you did it anyway.”
Sephiroth tried: “Angeal—”
“Not once did either of you ask about me.” Angeal reached up to wipe away a stubborn tear. “Because I have it handled, right? Is that what you think?” He tried to swallow down the onslaught of ugly words threatening to spill, but was unsuccessful.
“If we were to put everything into perspective, yeah, Sephiroth, you had it way worse, and still do because you have to look at that poor excuse for a father every week.”
Sephiroth didn't look away, but he didn't say anything either, which is when Genesis cut in.
“At least you had—”
“—both parents who loved me,” Angeal finished for him, biting his lip, nodding, and letting the tears fall freely. He was sick of this. “Can't complain can I?”
He pushed past them, breaking for the door as he threw it open. “I can never fucking complain.”
Angeal stumbled into the hallway, his vision blurred with tears. He put as much distance between himself and the conference room as possible, his sobs echoing softly as he tried his best to get them under control.
With trembling hands, he reached into his hoodie and pulled out the photograph, the once-vibrant colors now yellowed by time. He had been staring at it all morning, marveling at how the wounds of loss reopened fresh each time he did so.
It had been at the autumn festival in Banora, him and his father holding caramel Banora white apples, both smiling. His mother had taken the photo when he was about eight, a time he would give anything to relive, knowing that his father's health would come to deteriorate within the year.
Genesis had never experienced such loss, and Sephiroth had his share, with Professor Gast's being the reason him and Angeal found common ground after Angeal's father passed. This thought briefly made Angeal feel guilty for claiming they couldn't understand, yet the overwhelming pain and grief clouded his ability to judge as he normally would.
Grief was ugly. It was a veil of conflicting emotions tarnishing joyous memories with a cloud of sorrow and dread. It swept you away in waves of confusion and anger, and became a constant companion that never left your side no matter how much you willed it away.
Angeal was tired today; he was tired of being the pillar of support for everyone else, of pretending to embody what a father should be when he yearned for his own father's presence. Tired—and maybe he could use that excuse coupled with the unpredictability of grief to make peace with how unreasonable he had been.
Ironically, in response to his wish, Angeal's phone buzzed with a message from Dr. Hollander, summoning him to the laboratory.
Wiping away his tears, Angeal headed for the elevator, unaware that he was about to get his wish in the most twisted way—he was about to spend Father's Day with his father.
Back in the conference room, Sephiroth was stunned as he watched Angeal slam the door. The reverberation of the impact echoed in the silence, cutting through the silent tension left in the wake of their argument.
Genesis, flustered and defensive, began to spout a flurry of ugly words, trying to justify his own actions as he paced back and forth.
Sephiroth, barely listening to Genesis, walked back to his chair and sat down gingerly. For a moment, he simply stared at his computer screen, the words blurring together.
“Genesis,” Sephiroth said quietly, interrupting his frantic words. “Enough. Please.”
Genesis stopped mid-sentence, turning to face Sephiroth. “What?”
“Just... enough.” Sephiroth’s voice was soft but firm. “We’ve done enough damage for today.”
Genesis hesitated, his anger dissipating into uncertainty as he sank back down into his chair. “I... I didn’t mean to hurt him. I was just...angry. You know that, right?”
“Intent doesn’t change the impact,” Sephiroth said, turning back to his computer and the work he had left unfinished. Sephiroth scrolled up, his eyes landing on the half-written reply he had been avidly typing before the argument erupted.
His fingers hovered over the keyboard.
Subject: Re: Happy Father's Day
Professor Hojo,
It is my belief that true fatherhood transcends mere biological ties—it is defined by compassion, guidance, and genuine support for one's child.
Fathers should aspire to create an environment where their children feel safe to explore, grow, and comfortably choose their own paths. This involves not only imparting wisdom but also fostering emotional security and unconditional love.
If one is unable to provide that, he is not a father.
If one does everything in his power to provide the opposite, I doubt he is worthy of being called a man.
Regards,
Your ‘offspring’
Sephiroth sighed, drawing his fingers upward to rub at his eyes. He had intended to have Angeal read over it for an opinion before sending it back. But now—
With a decisive click, Sephiroth highlighted the entire draft and pressed the delete key. The email vanished from his screen, leaving behind only a blank slate.
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Thought I'd give you a one word prompt for any of the Zelinks: Ghost.
@nocturnalfandomartist, thank you, thank you, thank you for this prompt. It inspired something that astonished me more the more I wrote - and I couldn't stop writing. It may be longer than you bargained for at 9K words, but I enjoyed writing every single word of it. I will write at least one follow-up. This is a canon-compliant sequel to What to Expect When Fetch-Questing and a loose sequel to The Seeds of Love, Well-Worn and What Once Rang Hollow (with a few continuity differences for that last one) but it can stand easily on its own. Rated T, post-TotK, humor, drama, and romance.
Eternal
Link was extremely pleased he had his own arm back.
Unfortunately, he was the only one.
Purah (“Are you fricking KIDDING me?! I wanted to study that thing!”), Robbie (“I must repair my balloon myself?!”), Impa (“Mmm—a pity. With it, we might have learned how to create our own constructs—perhaps incorruptible ones.”), Paya (“That’s too bad, Link—it looked good on you!”), Tauro (“Ahhh. I’m sure you’re feeling better, but I was hoping I could learn more of the Zonai language from it, somehow.”), Calip (“It’s gone?! What did you do with it? You should’ve given it to me as an expert in these matters!”), Sidon (“My dearest friend! Where has your adult arm gone? Are you well?”), Yunobo (“Oh NO, Link, you lost your cool arm!”), Tulin (“Oh mannn. You still have my pledge, Link, but I don’t think I should just…slap my rune on your body. We gotta get you some rings or something.”), and Riju (“I didn’t expect you to look so much smaller without it.”), not to mention every single member of the monster control crew, and essentially anyone in Hyrule who ever recognized him, all thought he’d been better off with part of Rauru grafted onto his body.
Even Zelda wasn’t (entirely) an exception.
She did appreciate Link’s hands during their personal time (“I must admit, Link, I’d have felt strange were you doing this with a Zonai’s hand rather than your own”), but the scholar and sovereign in her definitely mourned the loss of such a unique artifact.
“Link, is there any chance you still share a psychic connection with Rauru?”
“Nope,” he said.
She blinked at him.
“Sorry,” he said, blushing and sheepish.
Now that the depths, sky, and newfound caverns had created vast opportunities for exploration, research, and innovation, Zelda’s original aim of rebuilding Hyrule had essentially tripled. She and Link knew if they didn’t make depths exploration and settlement official, people would do it on their own and get themselves killed (or the Yiga would claim it, and Hyrule would be threatened again in a few centuries). So it was, indeed, official as were new initiatives to investigate Zonai technology—making the Great Abandoned Central Mine one of several hubs of Hyrulean activity in the depths. Its proximity to the healing spring directly beneath the Shrine of Resurrection had made it a frequent destination of theirs.
Link and Zelda materialized beneath the Koradat Lightroot to the weighty vertigo of silence in the dark beyond the root’s oasis.  It was the same every time—some quiet dread sinking into the deepest pit of Link’s belly, the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end.  He kept telling himself it would be better once people settled, with their warm lights and the sounds that come with them going about their daily business.  Zelda kept telling him otherwise. (“We oughtn’t fill this place to the brim with light, Link. We would disturb its ecosystem severely”).
Link was usually on board with leaving nature undisturbed for the most part.
Maybe it was the time he’d spent down here in utter silence but for his own footsteps, utter darkness but pale flowerlight shot into a black so matte it may as well have been death’s void; the pressure of vast expanses of pitch-black felt nothing like a sea of undisturbed trees far above in the light.
There wasn’t even any wind.
Were both nature? Yes. Were both natural?
It didn’t feel like it.
“Shall we?” Zelda said.
It severed Link’s fledgling reverie. He tore his eyes from the lightless maw beyond Hylia Canyon and turned to join Zelda in descending the steep slope on the path toward the Great Abandoned Central Mine. He gave her a small smile, though he knew, from her face, it didn’t reach his eyes.
Her return smile did. “I hear one of our survey teams discovered another root in that direction,” she said. “We merely- ah- well-“
“Have to figure out how to light it up without my arm,” Link said.
A hint of pink dusted Zelda’s cheekbones. “Yes. Sorry, Link.”
The mine’s central structure loomed in the distance, its light cold, the highest statue of the ancient Gerudo sage always watching, an intimidating glower over the hilt of her sword aimed at any who would ascend the formidable stair toward its main entrance.
“Hello, Aratra,” Zelda whispered, as she always did, as though the woman herself could still answer her.
As they neared the bottom of the hill, blue flickered in Link’s vision. “Zelda,” he said, pointing to the small cluster of poes coming into view on the left.
The spectre of that intimate grief between them passed over her face as she nodded.
He didn’t say it wasn’t her fault.
Since he didn’t say it, she didn’t say it could be.
The words floated between them, spoken so many times they’d become an immutable understanding: that she’d been too slow, that he’d been too silent, that they’d both been too obedient to the long-dead king whose grave Zelda still brought blue gentians to in the early days of each summer.
That neither of them blamed the other for it.
That they’d both spend the rest of their lives making up for it.
And that they’d do it together.
Neither of them knew whether the spiritual flames were casualties of the Calamity.
Link only knew the vague sense of relief he felt when they entered him. It felt like they felt safe—sometimes, he even sensed joy—and they clung to him so hard.
They clung to Zelda, too, it turned out.  As they approached, the spirits snapped eagerly into whichever of them was nearest, nestling somewhere unfathomable within them until released to a bargainer’s care. Link still didn’t trust the bargainers, exactly, though they intended to visit the one in the mine that day.
They didn’t talk much. They usually didn’t when sliding through the depths’ silence—sound felt like a beacon to whatever might be beyond the lightroot’s reach; yet they moved in unwavering agreement, sweeping up every poe in their path and off it within sight. It’s why they took the long route to every work site.
They veered far off the path at one point to collect a dozen wayward souls atop a half-buried ruin of a toppled archway.
“If we go much further, we’ll be at the spring rather than the mine,” Zelda said.
“Yeah,” Link answered quietly. They turned to rejoin the path further up, hugging the rounded base of a monumental column presumably carved by nature, reaching the impossibly high ceiling of what was far, far too large to consider a mere cavern. It was like a space willed into existence by the gods themselves.
Link’s mood lifted as the sounds of civilized activity reached him, more and more distinct as they neared the foot of the quadruple-flight of stone stairs beneath the statue’s feet. Link caught a glimpse of a Sheikah scientist, little but a few motes of color on the highest level of the structure, cheerful construct “Brrrp!”s reflecting toward them off any of hundreds of stone facades: every surface the same pale grey—every light cool and lifeless.
Link couldn’t imagine living in such a place. With an irritated grind of his teeth, he realized he strongly preferred the haphazard Yiga structures, with their paper and oil lights and bound wood. The real, green-leaved brightblooms were also better than the Zonai’s artificial torches.
“Rupee for your thoughts,” Zelda whispered.
Link huffed. “The place needs some color.”
She paused on the stairs, a third of the way up, her torso shaking with laughter and her hand squeezing his tight.
Link tried not to smile. He didn’t want her to think he liked being laughed at.
“Link,” she said, holding her stomach, “that is…precisely the sort of observation I ought to expect you to make.”
He really tried to keep a sour grimace on, but he knew his lips were going twitchy.
“Unfortunately,” Zelda said, eyeing his lips with suspicion, “I am no longer in a position to pass on your criticism of Zonai décor.”
Link snorted. “Neither am I. But I definitely would’ve said something to Rauru if I’d seen this before he disappeared.”
“I have no doubt! And truly, you’re right. I cannot imagine spending any great length of time down here with nothing but grey stone and white light.”
Link nodded. “At least not without experiencing crushing environmental depression.”
Zelda inclined her head, no longer laughing. “Indeed. It makes one wonder.”
“Wonder what?”
“…Whether the monsters find it as unpleasant as we do,” she said, her eyes sweeping the far-off dark.
Link let that one sink in as they made the landing. Zelda touched the dais on which her old ally stood with reverence. When her hand slid from the porous stone, they continued up the staircase on her right. The chamber below would wait until later.
They ascended among tents clustered on the flagstones before the forge, lining the walls both natural and Zonai-made right up to the great arch.  They littered the circular courtyard on the other side of the building, too, the royal crest and symbols of the Sheikah, Zonai Survey Team, and Gerudo adorning many. The familiar sound of a fan whirred somewhere above them, out of sight.
It had been quite a stroke of luck, really, that Link had activated these facilities before Rauru’s arm vanished. The constructs had still recognized him as their “primary authorizer” and he’d been able to grant access to others.
He admitted, though, it was getting cumbersome; the moment he saw Ponnick, he knew he’d run out of time to think about Zelda’s monster-wonderings.  He flagged Link down (as if Link wasn’t looking straight at him) with arms wild above his head. “Thank the skies you’re here, we have new recruits!”
Link then spent the obligatory hour introducing them to all the constructs in the facility.
Zelda had her own work in store for her. Between decisions regarding distribution of newly acquired zonaite and reports from the excavation, inventory, innovation, and engineering teams, she easily had a full day of deliberation and arbitration ahead. Link joined her for much of it once he’d fulfilled his authorization duties—after all, he’d become something of an amateur engineer himself. It was nice to have something scientific to contribute when talking with Zelda.
“You can totally build a wing/hot-air-balloon hybrid!” he’d said.
 “Link, that sounds quite impractical-“
“No, no, you don’t put the balloon in the middle, you put it on the nose at an angle, see?  Then it drags the wing upward.”
“L- Link- what of the flame needed?“
“Oh, no, it’s fine, you only get burned a little bit.”
“What?!”
“And you still put the fans on the back, you know, to help out. Oh, and the steering stick.”
“Link, forgive me, but the flame shall not be directed straight up. It is inefficient and unsafe.”
“Yeah but the LIFT!”
He’d quite liked his flaming plane. So had Robbie.
Today, the engineering talk had more to do with shoring up mining tunnels, which while important, did not require Link’s particular flair for incendiary devices. All their talk of angles, sines, and cosines seemed a bit more precise than his higgledy-piggledy constructions to hold up Addison’s signs, so he eventually left them to it, jogging instead to the rim of the courtyard, climbing up, and inviting all the poes newly showing themselves to join him—then scouting for more from his higher vantage point. He’d grown used to the quizzical looks from everyone else but Zelda.
“What?” he’d asked as Ponnick watched him jog, zig-zagging, in a roughly circular area covered in pale grey and lavender fungi.
“What are you doing?”
“Collecting the poes,” Link said.
“Poes? Where?!” Ponnick spun, wildly searching for spirits which glowed blue, plain as day, in Link’s vision.
At least Zelda could see them, too.
On balance, between the poes, soldiers’ spirits, koroks, Hestu, and the dragons of the springs, he’d have presumed himself insane if no one else ever saw what he saw.  He almost had after the ghost of King Rhoam disappeared right in front of his face in the Temple of Time: an insane amnesiac with delusions of heroism.
Except they hadn’t been delusions, because he’d killed the crap out of Ganon.
Twice.
Or, of course, he imagined it. Twice.
Link shook his head. No point going down that route. If he imagined that, he imagined everything, and if that was the case he might as well relax and start attaching rockets to every exhausted korok’s backpack like that one by Outskirt Stable.
Poor little guy. At least he made it the eleventh time.
He huffed to himself. Sometimes, Zelda thought he was a little nuts. He supposed he could see why.
As a particularly large poe with a bright pink fringe zzipped its way into his body, Link caught a wink of blue between boulders at the stone circle in the distance to the north—a small zonaite deposit he’d cleared of monsters for what seemed to be the final time, the blood moons having ended.
It sparked his curiosity.
He sprinted the first hundred feet, then slowed to a reasonable pace. He didn’t want to go too far and worry Zelda, but if there were poes at that old monster nest, he didn’t want to leave them there.
Ten minutes later, he entered the mouth of the circle, three moldy, rickety old watch-posts within and another gap in the rocks across from him. Blue flickered beyond it: five poes huddled together. As he approached, flashes of his last encounter there played across his mind’s eye. The bokoblin on the platform before him had seen him first and tried to rain fire-fruit-arrows on him. Two silver moblins had slouched toward him, intent on splitting him open with their horns or the decayed royal claymores they’d somehow gotten. The other two bokoblins had fallen quickly to Tulin’s duplicate. Five monsters in all.
Link’s lip curled.
He hesitated on the brink of turning back, the thought of helping anything that may once have been a bokoblin sending a shockingly wicked taste of bile up his throat. He brought a fist to his mouth, pressing it deep to his skin, the imprint of his teeth stark against his lips.
No one memory stood out.
He’d never met a bokoblin that hadn’t aimed to kill on sight—never known one to show mercy, or even disinterest. Once they knew a person was near, they entered an unstoppable, murderous frenzy until they succeeded or someone put them down.
Link shut his eyes and took breath after deep breath.
He didn’t know anything for sure, and the bargainers never said.
Except they did say.
“Good… Evil… That’s the futile perspective of narrow-minded beings… There is no such distinction in wandering spirits.”
When he next looked, the flames flickered every bit as forlorn as they always did. He shook his head, his feet finally choosing forward for him.
When the poes joined the others in Link, he felt the usual sense of relief. Whoever or whatever they were, they seemed glad to be with him—not as happy as the ones he’d found in the deepest pit of the mine beneath Hateno, but if he was stuck for Goddess-knows how long at the absolute bottom of a pitch-black pit, he’d have been overjoyed to get out, too.
He took his time on the way back to the courtyard, half-watching a team excavate a buried section of the cracked enclosure and half-scouting for more glints of spirit-light, pensive, wrinkling his nose as he became aware of the sticky sheen on his skin. He pulled a handkerchief from his pouch and took it to his face. It came away slightly green with the powdery spores always floating in the too-still air of the depths.  Zelda collected them to study, but Link preferred not to be the collection vessel.
Zelda herself appeared over the edge of the wall as he swept the cloth beneath his left eye a second time. He watched her make her way down the inclined stone the natural grace she’d always had.
When he reached her, she was busy snapping images of the newly excavated section of stone.
“It is remarkable how they accomplished this precision on such a massive scale.” The Purah Pad clicked. “These structures were erected before my time with them—long before for most. They are scattered so far and wide and yet certain markings on them are precisely identical. I suppose they may have mass-produced stones as they did construct parts and delivered them afar.”
Link grew a soft, sideways smile as he listened. He could imagine her doing exactly this in the sunshine, her hair brushing the small of her back, himself silent as always, allowing her voice to wash over him until she inevitably remembered who she was talking to.
“The compendium feature is still something of a mystery,” she’d said, snapping a carefully-timed shot of a warm darner just as it paused, searching for prey.
“It recognizes certain species, but not others. Initially, Purah and I believed its recognition to be related to useful effects. Warm darners are of use in elixirs to resist cold temperatures, for example. Yet despite being unable to identify any species of tree, the Slate recognizes certain perfectly ordinary fruits, including apples.”
Link thought apples were too delicious to be ordinary.  He didn’t dare say so, but the phantom flavor of hot buttered apple flooded his mouth and his stomach betrayed him with a thoroughly embarrassing hunger-pang much-too-much like the sound of a hopeful retriever begging for an appley treat.
Zelda’s back stiffened. She glanced over her shoulder at his now-pink face, her eyes flicking to the blue pommel peeking out behind his ear. Link remained perfectly still, and that included not swallowing his imaginary-apple-induced-saliva.
Then-Zelda had returned to imaging wildlife in a rankling silence.
Now-Zelda heard him huff a laugh and turned with a smile sparkling despite the cold light of this place. She hooked the Purah Pad onto her belt. “May I ask what’s amused you so?”
Link shrugged a little. “Ways you haven’t changed.”
“Ah,” she said, threading her fingers through his. “And what of ways I have?”
His voice emerged low and soft. “I love those.” He squeezed her hand.
It made her smile at him in a way far too similar to how she had much earlier that morning, not long after waking up. He swallowed as she pulled him toward her—then she squinted at him and laughed a little through her nose, taking the handkerchief still in his other hand and beginning to wipe his forehead.
“I did that already,” he chuckled.
“You missed your hairline,” she said with the soft laugh he’d come to recognize as her equivalent of a giggle. “It’s fortunate this substance does not irritate your lungs as it does for some.”
“Especially Nappin.”
“Indeed, yes, especially Nappin. I do not believe depths research is his calling.”
“Nope.”
“You must have walked through a thick patch.”
“Ran through, more likely.”
“Oh? Where did you go?”
Link motioned toward the stone circle in the distance.
Her brow pinched. “Monsters?”
“Poes,” he said, wondering if he should tell her about the coincidence of the number. It might make her feel better, to have some hint these weren’t all souls marooned by the Calamity, but he wasn’t sure how she’d take the possibility they might be doing favors for monsters who’d been intent on murdering them in life.
She must have seen it in the motions of his mouth, nearly but not quite speaking. “Something else?” she asked.
He sighed soft through his nose. “Just something that made me think.”
The corner of her mouth quirked. Then her whole face opened up in mock-surprise. “Incredible!”
“Pfff,” he said with a poke to her ribs.
She squeaked. The three people working on the excavation behind Zelda went from studiously ignoring them to unabashed staring. Link gave them a small wave just as he registered Zelda’s eyes narrowing at him.
She began to rub the handkerchief all over the crown of his head with unnecessary vigor.
“Hey!”
The sounds coming from her as he pushed her hands away were much more like a girlish giggle than anything she usually produced. “It was in your hair, too,” she pointed out.
“There’s probably some in yours, Princess,” he warned.
Her eyebrows shot very close to the hairline her hands had risen to protect.
Link smirked. Her braid was much more difficult to fix than his ponytail. He made short work of his, shaking his now-mussed hair out and re-gathering it in the tie. Hyper-aware of the team still at rapt attention in the background, he finished up and offered his hand to Zelda. “Truce?”
She took it with a small smile. “Yes, please—but sincerely, I would like to know what gave you pause in the short time we were separated.”
His smile ebbed as he began to lead her over the shallower side of the half-buried stone walkway. It was no use, really. He’d only been good at hiding things from her when she refused to look at him, so long ago.
“There were five poes,” he said, “same as how many monsters I last cleared out.”
Their feet fell so quiet on the soft courtyard ground covered in pale, fuzzy flora he had no real names for, some soft and mossy, others more like wisps or powders. A few prickled. He liked the purple ones best for breaking up all that grey.
Their feet followed the same path without any hesitance or need for confirmation—toward the great central corridor. Zelda finally answered ten feet from its first stones.
“The statues say… good and evil… are meaningless for them.”
“…Yeah.”
“For a few moments, I was wondering whether only the spirits remaining clear in the shape of Hylian soldiers were people, but… no.  For they aren’t poes at all, are they?”
Link shook his head. “No. They… find their way on their own. Once they’re done.”
Zelda nodded. “They had a purpose—to help you,” Zelda said.
“To help someone, anyway. Whoever came around to fight back.”
A series of clanging sounds echoed down the stone steps into the corridor, along with quizzical "Brrrp!"s and a Hylian's grumbling. Link's right hand flexed. No more convenient ultra-glue. He kept walking.
“Why down here?” Zelda asked.
She’d spoken so quietly he had to think to process her words over the noise.
“You mean why in the depths?” Link asked.
“Yes. Why so far beneath the place they perished? There seems little hope of aiding someone here, doesn’t there?”
“I came along.”
“Yet they can’t have known you would. They wouldn’t even have known the depths were here to travel here intentionally.”
Link shook his head. He had absolutely no idea.
They descended in thoughtful silence to the base of Aratra’s main statue, then behind her into the yawning chamber tucked deceptively beneath the center of the great structure.
It struck Link, as it often did, as the offer of an embrace. As the chamber opened before them, the long bridge leading from the entrance directly to the four-eyed face of the greatest bargainer statue, the platform running abreast its shoulders combined with its massive arms and it appeared so ready to encircle whatever came before it. When he’d first stood there, he expected it, watched those hands out of the corner of his eye, waiting for movement.
It had never come.
Instead, a distant but surprisingly level-headed voice had issued from the alien face. It had helped him—no question about that.
The poes gladly rushed into its waiting arms—no doubt about that, either.
But this entity had also played a trick on him to get him down here. He would never trust it the way he trusted the Goddess.
The Goddess statues were another matter entirely. Now that he knew more than one thing could talk out of them, he was a lot more wary than he’d been before.
They came to a halt near the great statue’s face.
“You who stand before me,” it said in tones of single drops of water echoing in a deep, black lake, “offer poes to me. They are spirits that ought to return to the afterlife.”
As always, the poes simply left them. With hundreds or thousands of spirits somehow housed within him, Link always expected there to be something like a whirlwind, or flashes of light—but there wasn’t. It was swift and gentle as a sigh: barely a murmur of any motion or sound. It took merely a moment.
Then a wave of desperate grief seized the core of Link’s body and he cried out, clutching at an anguished heart, though neither the cry nor the heart were his own.
“Link!” Zelda gripped his biceps, her face stricken.
“Z-elda-“ he said, more to answer her than anything else, at a complete loss.
“Two do not wish to leave you,” said the bargainer.
Link’s breath caught.  Zelda’s eyes flew wide, and she looked him up and down as though trying to find them. “Can you- pull them from him?”
“I can do no more than guide,” the bargainer answered. “I show the way home.”
“They usually seem quite pleased to go home. So- why?” Zelda’s face seemed approaching a panic like none he’d seen in over a hundred years.
“I’m fine, Zel,” Link said, “really- NO, really, I’m fine, I’m just- I feel what they feel.”
“Yes, I do as well, but this-“
“This is them not wanting to go,” Link said, shaking. His eyes met first the lower, then the upper pair of the bargainer’s. “Can you talk to them?”
“After a fashion.”
“Can you figure out why-“
“I know why.”
Link and Zelda waited a few beats.
“We would appreciate it if you would inform us,” Zelda said, a hint of exasperation in her voice.
There was a depth of quiet, as though all sound plummeted into some unseen pit, unable to return, siphoned, whenever the bargainers spoke across fathoms to their brethren.  It muted Link’s accelerated breaths. Zelda’s grip tightened, her mind visibly whirring behind the eyes flicking between his features.
“…You have made a substantial offering,” the bargainer said at length.
Link and Zelda exchanged a glance.
“You have made many offerings,” it continued, “many more than any other being in countless ages.”
Link experienced the distinct sensation of someone…curling around him, like Zelda would, holding him tight, but inside his own chest.
“If you agree, I will honor these spirits’ requests as repayment for your offerings.”
“Agree?” Zelda asked. “What requests?”
“They would speak with you,” it clarified.
The curl tightened. It felt like far, far more than a desire to speak. A creeping dread rose in him—his own—of what spirits would choose to cling with such desperation to his body.
Someone terrified of death? Of the afterlife? Maybe someone with a last request—a regret? Two someones—at the same time, when it had never happened before?
Or did the bargainer mean… “W-wait,” Link said with a swallow. “Do they want to speak to someone in general? Or is it just me? Or Zelda?”
Link resisted an inexplicable urge to whimper.
“It is you who stand before me,” the bargainer said.
“Meaning Link,” Zelda said squinting at the statue.
It stared as though its answer had been obvious.
“Do they mean him harm?” Zelda’s tone had hardened considerably. “We have seen spirits lift weapons- perform magic.“
Link lurched with a sudden fear—could he have picked up Ganondorf’s soul?
“I offer you a boon,” the bargainer said, “not a curse.”
Zelda blinked, taken aback, while Link registered the depth of the anguish invading his heart.
It didn’t feel like Ganondorf. He’d have been hatred—envy—fury.
No, that wasn’t it.
This was regret. Something undone or unfinished.
Link closed his eyes and tried to… reach—within himself, where this spirit wound around him. So tight—clinging—stubborn. Something made him breathe an incredulous laugh, and he didn’t even know why; but the more he seemed to press into the spirit’s space the more familiar it seemed, an intense vertigo hurtling toward him from an invisible horizon slamming his awareness into long ago, when the world was over a hundred years younger.
Link’s body gasped.
Link’s mind looked down at a very spiteful young girl with a thick mop of mixed sand-and-straw-and-acorn-colored hair which he’d wrestled into a braid for her earlier that day, springy strands poking out at odd angles as she narrowed her eyes at him, her gangly arms vice-gripping his ribs, her hands fisted, and her feet planted wider than shoulder-width apart, as though to brace him immovably in-place.
“This isn’t going to work out for you, cheeter,” Link said.
“You’re not going,” she answered, her voice a mix of petulant and acrid.
“I… kind of am.”
“Nope.” She sniffed, a bit of her own hair having tickled its way to the edge of one nostril.
“I mean, if you won’t let go, I can just drag you all the way to the castle.”
“Good.”
“Good?!”
“Dad takes you everywhere. My turn.”
“You clinging to my midriff isn’t the same as Father taking you somewhere.”
Her lip curled and Link felt kind of bad, but what did she expect? “You’re eleven.”
“So?”
“So you’re not even out of school yet!”
“Castle Town has a school.”
“So you want to go to school in Castle Town while I’m in training all day and pretty much not see me anyway?”
“At least I’ll get to do something.”
Link laughed so hard he went silent, the girl’s chin bopping his ribs painfully with each spasm of his diaphragm.
“What are you laughing at?!”
“Chee… for Hylia’s sake, you’ll just be at a different school!”
“With you.”
“What about Mom?” Link said.
Chee went quiet for a moment, her eyes softening a little, though they still shone like tiger’s-eye. He could tell she was trying not to grimace.
“That is totally your sheepish face trying not to come out,” Link said.
 “Dad leaves her alone,” Chee said quietly. “A lot.”
Link’s smile left him. “No… he doesn’t. Because she has us.”
“You mean me.”
“Yeah, okay… so it’s been you more than me. But do you really want to leave her here while we both go?”
“She could come.”
Link shook his head. He was getting sidetracked. Mom wasn’t really what this was about, and neither was a different school, or Castle Town, or even his sister getting to do more exciting things. “Look, Chee… I know you’ll miss me.”
She grunted and pumped all the air from his lungs with her bony arms (damn she was strong).
“I’ll miss you too. A lot.” He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed, hard, but not too hard. He was way too strong for his own good, or hers. “More than anyone,” he whispered.
“Link?”
“No way.”
“Yep.”
“You’re a total mommy’s boy.”
“Yeah, well, doesn’t mean my sister can’t be my favorite person.”
“Link, please- answer me!”
“He communes,” the bargainer said, the sound of distance itself as the image of Link’s little sister faded.
The feel of her arms around him remained.
“I agree!” Link blurted.
“What?!” Zelda said, her thumb swiping at a wetness on Link’s cheek.
As the embrace of his innermost self bled from Link, he tripped forward, his arms desperate, seeking to return it. His hands found Zelda’s waist, and his eyes found hers—whatever she saw in them made her hug him tight about his shoulders.
“Link?” she said.
He held her too, unsure how to begin, but any words died on his lips at the sight of blue flame coalescing behind her. He tapped Zelda’s back, taking her by one shoulder and turning her to look.
Two spirits came into slow being before them, veiled in a pale blue glow, their features weaving into existence as patches of light, seamless once in place. Flames licked their feet, one moment there, then gone. They were old women, but as Link watched, their edges shimmered, and they took the forms he knew they would—some hidden heart within him had already known, had felt their shades only in his most dreamless of sleeps, in the darkness with them.
One woman stood almost exactly his height, about forty years old, and looked very much like him. The other had become the girl who’d insisted he stay home with her over a century ago.
How could his waking mind have forgotten them so thoroughly? He really was an insane amnesiac with delusions of heroism. He’d have to be insane to forget people he loved so much.
“Mom. Chee,” he said, and as he did, their tears fell, too. They rushed to embrace him, both at once, and he could feel them, they were real, and his deepest core spoke a wordless vow to offer a gift worthy of the bargainer’s extraordinary blessing.
--
Zelda balanced privacy and caution, wandering the length of the bargainer’s platform, the communion of three always at the corner of her eye, sitting cross-legged, knee-to-knee and hand-in-hand.
She’d known of his mother and sister, but they’d never met. He’d spoken of them only in bare, short spaces, quiet moments when Calamity’s imminence dulled.
How their Hateno home had not brought their memories forth long before now, she didn’t know. She’d sensed, sometimes, as Link stared at a piece of pottery or brushed his fingertips over a length of wood-grain on the banister, some glimmer of their former reality floating near to the surface—but it never emerged.
It’s why she’d delved into the mystery of the Shrine of Resurrection—into the healing spring beneath it in the depths—as though the missing parts of him had drifted into its bed, lying nascent against its darkest earth, far below.
They’d have stopped there again after this, on an ordinary day. She’d have given him her most sincere of smiles as she removed his leather—his bracers, his belts, his boots—her eyes never leaving his. She could feel the way his chest would rise and fall, quickening against the heels of her hands. They’d have entered the water together.
Zelda reached the platform’s edge. Hundreds of feet below, a small cluster of poes huddled in the great chamber’s corner, near the bargainer’s ankle; Zelda wondered that they’d come so close to the guiding statue, yet not found their way to the afterlife.
“They do not wish to cross,” the bargainer said.
Zelda gasped, one hand pressing flat to her chest. It had heard her?
“I can hear only you who stand before me.”
Zelda craned her neck toward the statue’s head, half-expecting it to have turned toward her. It hadn’t. “Not the others above us, then?” she whispered.
“Only you who stand before me.”
Zelda sighed, the bargainer keeping its secrets as always. She centered Link in her vision, speaking quietly with his lost family, so engrossed he’d not spared the statue a glance as its voice sounded.
“I spoke to you alone,” the statue said.
“Oh?” Zelda’s curiosity piqued. “I didn’t realize you could.”
She waited for a response, the spark of excitement slowly fading in the silence.
She oughtn’t have expected anything else. These beings showed interest in nothing but the welfare of the spirits they shepherded. She peered over the railing once more, at the flames flickering far below.
“If I go to collect them, will they come?”
“For you, yes. Undoubtedly.”
“And would they then move on as the others have?”
“Almost certainly.”
She wondered why her carrying them a few hundred feet would change their minds.
“Listen with he who also stands before me. You will understand.”
Zelda’s brow tightened, taken aback and hesitant to simply eavesdrop. She shuffled her feet.
The bargainer remained silent.
She approached the three with great reservation, her hands clasped before her, unwilling to simply insert herself within their conversation. She stopped partway across the platform. Should Link wish to include her, he would—yet he was rapt. He appeared as though drinking in every detail of his mother’s face over and over again. Perhaps he feared a more ordinary forgetfulness would take her from him a second time.
Zelda’s lower lip rose in understanding. Some days, she, too, struggled to see her father’s face clearly. Her mother’s had long been wiped blank.
She gasped, her hand touching the Purah Pad.
Link looked up at the sound, giving her a small smile, and as he did, the spirits looked at her as well, as though only just noticing her presence.
The spirit of Link’s mother smiled wide. “Link! Is she with you?”
Link turned deep crimson, his face twisting in a smiling grimace Zelda had never seen on him.
“Oooh!” his sister said, her face full of mock-scandalization. “Your face, Link. Wow. Is she… with you?” she asked, her eyebrows inching upward.
Link’s rested his face in his hands as the spirit-women giggled at him. Zelda couldn’t help but quirk a smile, herself, though she felt strange. She could not ignore the hesitance in her heart.
Transient.
It would be transient.
Her eyes threatened tears as she watched her lover, watched him be with them as though they yet lived.
Their departure would sink him as his forgetfulness never could have.
It took Link a minute and a few resurgences of giggling to recover enough to peer over his hands at her.
Then he held one out in invitation, turning that smile on her- the one that was for her alone. She drew a steeling breath, her fingers worrying at the pad’s cool surface. “Are you certain?” Zelda asked. “I’ve no wish to intrude.” I’ve no wish to cut your time short.
“I’m completely sure,” Link said, beckoning her toward him.
Her shoe scuffed on the first step and she swallowed, extending her hand. When he took it, his mother’s spirit slid to make room for her. Zelda sat as they did, her knee to Link’s, unable to smile and unsure what to say—though she had no intention of asking questions about the mechanics of spirithood, despite the bargainer’s nebulous words.
Link seemed to sense her uncertainty. He threaded his fingers through hers and moved closer, drawing her hand warm into his lap, his shoulder to hers. Zelda couldn’t help but find his eyes, and though she knew his smile and the squeeze of her hand were nothing but sincerity, a truth to reassure her, the smile she gave held a depth of sadness for the future this would bring.
“That is so a yes,” his sister said, snapping the moment in two. Link’s eyes rolled and fluttered shut, and a small laugh left Zelda’s nose despite her visions of Link falling apart.
“The sky’s sake, Chee,” his mother chuckled. “You lived to be ninety-two. I’d expect you to have matured eventually.”
“Are you kidding? This is my chance to be a kid again. I’ll take it!” The girl smiled at Link, but an intense sadness lay in the core of her eyes, the precise contours of her lips. Zelda recognized its longing.
It was in his mother’s, too. “Link, my little love,” the older woman said, shifting a soft smile between him and Zelda, “why don’t you introduce us?”
Link huffed a laugh and gave Zelda a look so like one he’d given her just before the Calamity struck—on Mount Lanayru—something sad yet loving and utterly immovable all at once. She wondered wildly for a moment exactly how he’d introduce her—for she wasn’t his wife, not yet, but “fiancé” seemed an entirely inadequate word.
Fated. Soulmate. Destined. Those- those began to approach the magnitude of whatever connection had laid between them even from the beginning.
“Mom- Chee,” Link said, his eyes and smile still soft, still on her. “This is the love of my life.” His thumb stroked the edge of her hand. “Zelda.”
She and her smile warmed, his words an anchor to the present. Her free hand curled around his bicep and their foreheads somehow met, though she’d not intended to approach him.
His eyes on hers.
Those calm waters she always wished to dive deep within. They seemed to go on forever, further than Link himself could know, to a place warm, safe, and eternal.
Should she ever tell him so, he would give her his lopsided smile with that deep dimple of his. He would tell her the reverse—that she was his eternal goddess, and he worshiped her—that it wasn’t about him.
But it was about him. She knew it in her deepest self. They two were as one. When it came time for her to pass into the afterlife, she knew she would not go without him.
A sudden understanding drew an aching smile on her face for all the little lights in the darkness.
Though the silence between them bore no tension, its length emerged in her awareness. No irreverent remark issued from his sister; his mother had asked no questions of her. She turned with a flutter of dread, expecting, somehow, the spell to be broken—to see empty space where the spirits had been. Instead, she found their gazes on them, awed.
“What is it?” Link asked softly.
They seemed at a loss for speech. Their eyes traveled all around and above and below them, their hands locked together. His mother’s eyes fell on Zelda’s, and his sister’s on Link’s.
“It was you,” his sister said.
Link shook his head. “What was?”
“You… shine,” his mother said, her voice like a whisper in a cathedral. “Together. Like- the light of a thousand Suns.”
Link turned as though searching for that light himself. “Zelda does- she shines with her magic.”
 “No, Link. Both of you,” his sister said, shaking her head hard, her eyes shut for a moment. She opened them, squinting at Zelda. “I see you both ways right now. Before, I didn’t have eyes, not anymore. I do now, and I can see you sitting there, but I could see you before, too. You… you were the lights. You…” she gestured at them, her palm wide, “are the lights.” She swallowed. “Mom? Same for you?”
“Yes,” the older woman breathed. “Yes. I thought- Link, I’d thought the light had led us to you. I felt- so happy to finally be with you again. My little boy-“ tears slipped down her cheeks again, and she reached for Link, cupping his cheeks. “I thought- I still don’t understand- I thought I’d outlived you. I kept wishing, and wishing, and wishing in a sea of darkness to find you again.”
“We all thought you died at Fort Hateno,” Chee said quietly.
“But the light didn’t lead me to you,” said his mother with a tearful smile. “The light was you. And…” she smiled at Zelda, “you. And together…” she shook her head.
“Together you get a lot brighter,” said Chee. “Like, a lot. Way more than double.”
His mother laughed. “I don’t have the right words- to tell you- just how beautiful it is. I wish you could see it.”
Link’s sister raised her hand like a schoolchild, her eyes on Zelda, one eyebrow intensely arched.
“…Yeah, Chee?” Link asked cautiously.
“So… are you Princess Zelda?”
Zelda couldn’t help but laugh. “I am.”
Chee gawked and whacked Link’s arm.
“Ow-“
“You landed the Princess?!”
“It’s not-“
“And you didn’t even INTRODUCE her as the Princess?!!”
“Well, I didn’t want to- to-“
“To what, brag?”
“No, it’s just not what’s im-“
“It is so important-“
“Children,” their mother said.
They ceased so completely their hands froze mid-gesture.
The older woman offered her hand, palm up, to Zelda with a kind smile.
She took it, astonished to feel warm skin, no different from anyone else’s, a mere shimmer of blue at the outline setting her apart if she looked hard enough.
“My name is Junilla,” she said, placing her other hand over Zelda’s. “I am so sincerely pleased to meet you, Princess- and overjoyed that my son has found such love in his lifetime.”
Zelda returned the gesture, placing her other hand over the spirit’s. “I am grateful,” she said, “for this chance to meet you. That Link has been reunited with you after all this time…” she took a breath, “is a blessing.” Her gaze rose from Junilla to the eyes of the bargainer. The others’ gaze followed hers.
Chee traced the unfamiliar shapes of the statue’s eyes, a hand worrying in her lap. “How- how much time do we have?”
Junilla’s hand tightened for the space of a pulse around Zelda’s, searching the stone for an answer.
“The- bargainer didn’t say how long we could speak,” Link said softly, suddenly breathing strangely.
“The choice to move on is never mine,” the statue said.
Link blinked. “So- there’s no time limit?”
“I impose nothing. Yet my gift cannot extend beyond these walls.”
Link nodded, his face flat.
--
Ponnick and several Sheikah entered the space several times to check on them, so long they remained below.
They never appeared to notice the two strange women, though the Purah Pad had been able to take their pictures.
When she and Link finally left—at 5:17am according to the Purah Pad—the women faded without even a whisper of sound to two flickering blue flames, resting together beside the bargainer.
They would wait for Link’s father.
He and Zelda would begin their search in the depths beneath Akkala to find him—under the Citadel—though the bargainer warned that spirits may drift or become bound.
“End the final tide of gloom,” the bargainer said. “Only then may they all return home.”
Link seemed to understand.
They kept their appointments in Lookout Landing and Goron City for that morning and afternoon, having skipped their detour to the hidden spring of resurrection in favor of them. Link was unusually subdued as she’d expected, and her heart fell further and further as the day lengthened.
He’d barely smiled at Yunobo’s fist-bump.
He broke down in her arms, as she’d thought he would, at home in their bed, exhausted and shuddering with a grief which should have been foreign to him, as it should be to anyone—yet he had felt it before in lesser magnitude when the spirits of their friends, their allies, had become known to him, one by one and memory by memory, a sudden knowledge of what had been lost.
He’d even grieved over her in this way, for he’d no way to know she would emerge from the Calamity’s innards as a living being.
Zelda could not imagine it.
All she could do was hold him, kiss the crown of his head, stroke his hair, tell him it was alright.
“I am here, my love,” she said. “I am with you, and I shall stay.”
He nodded, unable, for the moment, to speak.
It was days later, the Sun a deep gold resting in a bed of lavender above the stand of trees west of their garden, when Link suddenly took her by the waist with his only-for-her smile and kissed her, gentle and questioning, then deeper as she rose to meet him, passionate, her arms wrapping about his neck, their bodies moving as a single unfettered wave. Her mouth parted from his breathless.
“L- Link,” she said.
He kissed her again, on her jaw—behind her ear.
“Are- you alright?” she breathed despite her body’s insistence that now was not the time to worry.
He breathed a very soft laugh in her ear and pulled back to look in her eyes. His hands left her hips to cup her face.
He spent a very long moment just like that. When he spoke, the sweet summer breeze danced with the sunflowers, his soft voice like its rustle through the birch leaves.
“I don’t want to remember what I’ve lost only to forget what I have.”
Her hand covered one of his, pressing it to her cheek.
“I love you so much,” he said, his smile growing, a joy nestled there despite the shadow always upon his features. A hint of mischief twitched his mouth. “So much we attract poes in the dark.”
A laugh burst from her. “Link- you are indeed the love of my life, but I’d rather thought it was our magic-“
But Link was shaking his head. “Magic, sure, for glowing when we’re alone, but… the light of a thousand Suns? That’s love. I know it.”
A memory burst to her mind’s eye, of a power as though the surface of the Sun itself, flowing from her as her knight clung to the thread of life behind her.
It had been love then. She knew that. Love of Link which had hurled her bodily before him, willing to die in his stead.
She pulled him close and tight—placed a long, gentle kiss on his cheek. He breathed a laugh and nuzzled her hair.
“You are- absolutely right, Link,” she said. “Absolutely right.”
They held each other, quiet, unhurried as the soft changes in the palette of the sky, restful as the setting sun, resting in the place sought by all the little lights far below—that place in Link’s eyes: a far deeper depth than any within this earth, for eternity had no limit.
She ought to have understood it sooner.
The lifetime of the Light Dragon had been a mere blink of an eye.
Link would love her far longer.
It wasn't transient.
Nor was his love for his sister, his mother, or his yet-unfound father. What resurrection had taken from him in life would have been found beyond the bargainer's crossing, just as she and Link would follow each other to the spirit realm, to whatever lay beyond.
Some well deep within herself whispered in the language of forgotten memories, a truth woven of silent echoes, veiled shades of her many selves passing through her as a thick-muffled feeling—and in that moment, safe and warm in Link’s arms, she felt they had done so before. Over and over again, passing in and out of death and life and realms and voids and time together, and always each other’s light.
She looked at Link, eyes and mouth wide open in a sort of shock, as though seeing him for the first time—as though just having remembered him.
“Zelda?!” He ducked, flickering from feature to feature of her face, his thumbs brushing tenderness on her cheeks and temples. “What is it? Are you okay?”
“Oh- oh yes,” she said, her voice shuddering. Her next smile glowed, for him and only him, all else in reality falling from her present. “I love you, Link.”
He grew a smile to match hers and then some. “You sound surprised,” he said with a chuckle.
She took his face in her hands and kissed his mouth, softly, full of reverence, and it felt like a first time. Link’s palm came to rest flat on the table beside her, pressing hard, bracing himself against a force Zelda felt, too, and welcomed—a compulsion to rejoin, to reunite. A shocking elation flooded her that he was wholly him, that he carried no spectre of an ancient king, no matter how benevolent, by his side, and she surged forward against him, delving, caressing: worshiping.
Her kiss released by a hair’s breadth, the heat of their lips a promise of imminence. Link’s heart raced against her elbow where it met his chest. “Z- el,” he said, utterly breathless, even more than he’d made her.
“I’ve always loved you,” she said, her voice quiet’s paramour. “And I always will.”
He stood before her, an avatar of adoration, every aspect of his being focused on her, the softness in his eyes unlike any she’d seen outside those moments he watched her at pleasure’s height. He brushed his lips to hers—not a kiss: a caress.
“You understand,” he said.
She kissed him again, her hands carding through his hair, thrilled when his eyes fluttered shut. She pulled back, a pause. “I do, now.”
“Forever,” he said.
“Through death and life again,” she answered.
In bed that night, Link slept soundly, his arms wrapped around her and his head resting on her chest. She sat partway up against the pillows, stroking his hair and thinking in a way she hadn’t in her waking life: a thinking more like feeling—more like acceptance.
This life was a gift.
A time to feel with skin, with heart and blood.
A time to be separate.
Not because they wished to be—but because it made their reunions that much more joyful.
And when it came time to fade from the physical, there would be nothing to separate them. They would be as one.
Death was not the end.
Birth was not the beginning.
And love…had neither.
She held Link a little tighter, smiling at his sleeping grumble, and closed her eyes.
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m1ckeyb3rry · 2 days
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CONGRATS ON 500 FOLLOWERS WOOO!! its been a little over a year since ive found your writting, how time flies T-T Could you possibly write a platonic gojo & reader oneshot where its just snippets of Gojo's first year teaching and the reader is a 1st year student not part of jujutsu society? I'd prefer if the mc had a somewhat introverted personality while being grumpy bc of being forced to attend the school. U can change their behaviour to what u feel more comfortable writing if u want tho!!
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── THE SCHOLAR
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Synopsis: A short snippet of how Satoru Gojo convinces you to be his first student in full.
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Event Masterlist
Pairing: Gojo & Reader
Chapter Word Count: 2.6k
Content Warnings: not many tbh…reader is a d1 hater of gojo and ino ig?? also just a hater in general LMAO she does NOT want to be there
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A/N: wow anon i can’t believe it’s been a year since you found my account and that you’ve stuck around for so long, that means a lot to me!! i apologize for how long this took me and how short it is 😫 it was a bit difficult for me to write gojo as a teacher without feeling like i was just rehashing his dynamic w a previous y/n i’ve written 😓 but i hope this is somewhat close to what you wanted?? also idk if you’ve read my fic pomegranate ink or not but i did throw in a reference to it at one point so props to anyone who catches that hehe
Additional: part of my 500 follower event! see the event description and rules to make a request of your own.
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You weren’t really sure what cause your classmate had to be as pleased as he was, but for some reason, the boy was bouncing in his seat, scribbling down notes with the fervor of a scholar — though you were quite certain that he was nothing of the sort, at least not when his test scores were taken into consideration. 
“Hey,” you whispered, tossing an eraser at his head when your teacher’s back was turned. “Ino. What’s the big deal? We’re not even learning anything yet, so what are you writing down?”
“Are you kidding me? Gojo just told us an entire story of his past. That’s valuable information!” Ino said. You frowned at him.
“It’s not valuable information, because he’s so prone to embellishment that he’s all but an author at this point. Besides, do you think you, or anyone else for that matter, will ever face seven first grades and come out the winner, without even a scratch?” you said.
“He’s the strongest sorcerer in the world, though, so it’s feasible for him,” Ino said.
“Right,” you said, rolling your eyes. “Maybe for him, but not for anyone else. This is just bragging under the guise of an educational opportunity. We’re never going to be powerful enough to replicate such a feat, so what’s the use in wasting our time talking about it?”
“You’re such a spoil-sport,” Ino huffed. “We’re the first students to ever get to learn from Satoru Gojo, and somehow, you’re complaining about it? That’s ridiculous no matter what way you put it!”
“Is everything okay?” 
Both you and Ino jumped as Satoru Gojo appeared in front of your desks, peering down at you over the lenses of his dark glasses. He didn’t seem annoyed that you were talking while he was ‘teaching’; in fact, he looked excited, as if he wanted to join in the conversation as well. You could imagine him pulling up a chair and resting his chin in his hands as he gossiped with you, and it made you scoff.
“Everything’s fine. We were just wondering when you were actually going to start the lesson,” you said.
“She was wondering that!” Ino rushed to clarify. You shot him a dirty look out of the corner of your eye, which he ignored — you supposed loyalty didn’t mean much to him, as you two weren’t really friends and therefore couldn’t inspire much loyalty in one another regardless. “I was telling her how fascinated I am by the story you were telling!”
“Suck-up,” you hissed.
“Stupid,” he hissed back. Gojo clapped his hands, returning to the front of the classroom with a distinctly unacademic swagger to his step that made you internally fume.
“No worries, we’re just getting to that part! Today, we’ll go over some basic curse theory,” he said, drawing simplistic shapes on the chalkboard to accompany his explanations. As usual, Ino was absorbed by the standard bullshit Gojo spouted, but you found it to be so boring that you actually began to nod off, catching up on the sleep you had missed last night due to a mission which had run later than expected.
Unlike Ino, who had been automatically enrolled in the school because of his family lineage, you had been scouted as a fresh talent by Satoru Gojo himself. It had been a long conversation, and he had only managed to convince you in the end by telling you all about Kaito Hinode, the well-regarded first year teacher who you would study under. Hinode was a sorcerer you believed you wouldn’t have trouble respecting, and so you begrudgingly agreed to attend the school and give the whole notion of ‘jujutsu sorcery’ a shot.
Then Hinode retired, mere weeks before you were set to begin at the school, and his replacement was revealed to be none other than that irreverent, inept, and decidedly unserious man who you had secretly hoped you would not see much more of: Satoru Gojo.
You didn’t even want to be a sorcerer in active duty, but the theoretical side of it interested you to an almost unhealthy extent. You spent days upon days studying the workings of curses and cursed energy, to the point that you could be considered almost an expert. That was the only thing cheering you about coming to the school, that you’d get to discuss with individuals on your level, and so it had been such a heartbreaking disappointment when Gojo, who cared little about the causes and more about the results, was the only proper sorcerer you came into frequent contact with.
The other teachers didn’t have time to entertain your pestering, far too busy with their own students, which meant that Gojo was really your only option. And of course you had tried — really, you had. You had presented him with your questions and ideas, but he had only made a face and told you that studying curse theory to this extent wouldn’t help anyone, and least of all yourself.
He wanted you to learn how to fight, but you didn’t care for that. You didn’t want to fight. If you could spend the rest of your days shut away in a study, reading your books and taking notes on them, then you’d be quite content. You were reluctant to go on missions, even if you were ten times better than your peers, and you often dragged your feet heading into your practical classes. More than once, Ino had had to hoist you over his shoulders and sprint to the training field so that you were not both late, and you knew that you probably shouldn’t be so harsh on him given that, but because it meant that you had to exert yourself on the battlefield instead of rereading your favorite essays, his good intentions only made you resent him more.
“You know, you could really be a great sorcerer,” Gojo said to you one day. You were sitting on a bench while Ino did exercises, ink smudging your hand as you meticulously annotated a book that the principal had given to you. You blinked up at him, amazed once again at how tall he was. He blocked out the sunlight, his shadow looming over you in a way that would’ve been ominous if he wasn’t so typically harmless.
“Hm?” you said, returning to your book when you realized he wasn’t going to say anything of importance. “Sure, I guess I could be.”
“Becoming a first grade isn’t an impossibility for you. It’s something attainable, which is incredibly rare for someone as young as you,” he continued.
“Right,” you said.
“Do you care about that, though?” he said.
“Nope,” you said. “I have no interest in being a first grade sorcerer. It just means more dangerous missions, doesn’t it? I don’t care about all of that.”
“It also means a higher salary,” he said.
��Probably not high enough to make up for the risks,” you said.
“Well, it’s pretty high, though only you can decide if it makes up for the risks or not,” he said.
“Listen, sir, I’m only even here because you told me I could further my studies with people renowned in their fields. Do you mind telling me what field you’re renowned in? Because for some unfathomable reason, you’ve ended up as my teacher,” you said.
“I’m…the strongest sorcerer? In the world?” he said, though the way he phrased it made it seem like he was asking you instead of telling. You shrugged.
“That’s an intrinsic talent. You didn’t learn to be that way; you were just born with it. Sure, you had to practice, but practicing and studying are different. Anyways, even if you are the strongest soldier, I think we’ve established that that’s not something I’m interested in. I was supposed to be under the tutelage of wise and experienced professors, but instead, I’m being instructed by you, who’s barely even a few years my elder and has never taught before,” you said, closing your book and holding it to your chest, smiling tightly at him. “I’m staying here because my parents already paid the tuition fee, but I’m not happy about it. Just so you know.”
“If you’re a first grade sorcerer, you also get more access to information,” he said after a moment. “Stuff behind a million clearances that only people of a sufficiently high rank get access to.”
You froze, your eyes brightening at the thought of this forbidden knowledge. You already knew that you were missing several key pieces in your preliminary research, but no matter how hard you looked, you had never been able to find the answers to the seemingly obvious questions. Was this why? Was it really because you did not have the seniority to warrant the understanding?
“Is that truly the case?” you said.
“I can’t help you in terms of books and learning and all of that boring stuff,” he said. “But if you put in a bit more effort, I can turn you into someone that the higher ups listen to, instead of the other way around.”
You mulled this over before nodding, standing up and leaving your book on the bench.
“Okay. I’ll do as you tell me to, but like I said earlier, I’m not going to be happy about it,” he said.
“Who cares? You can be the gloomiest girl alive!” he said, reaching out to ruffle your hair. “Let’s work together, Y/N!”
“I’m your student,” you reminded him. “Not your friend.” 
He waved you off. “You’re old enough to be both. Now let’s get to training!”
It was horrible, being Gojo’s favorite student. For one, Ino was jealous — although soon enough he found another mentor to cotton on to, and then your relationship with him mended into something a little more cordial and polite. For another, Gojo had this strange penchant for throwing you into impossible situations and watching in glee as you struggled to get out of them.
His missions also tended to be errands disguised as pressing matters. Once, he made you run around Tokyo, stopping in various stores so that you could improve your conditioning — stores which just so happened to carry the items on his week’s grocery list. Another time, you single-handedly had to exorcise every single curse harassing a nearby bakery — a bakery which just so happened to carry a specialty flavor of cake that was his new favorite. Whenever you complained about the silly chores, he asked if the exercise had made you stronger or not. You would begrudgingly admit that it had, and then he’d tell you that you should just think of it as a win-win scenario and stop whining.
“Y/N!” That was how it always began: he would shout your name as he entered the classroom, usually accompanying it with a wad of paper or some other, similarly harmless object sent flying your way. You’d catch it in one hand and glare at him.
“What?” This would prompt him to explain his ridiculous plan for the day, after which he would turn to Ino and hand him his assignments. He had gotten special permission from the school to train you in this non-orthodox manner, given that you were so far ahead in any material that giving you homework would be redundant and a waste of time for all parties involved. For his part, Ino did not complain, for he had long ago lost interest in training with Gojo, who was admittedly terrible at actually explaining anything of note.
You made a good pair, you and Gojo, or at least as good of a pair as could be made given the circumstances. As the year went on, you grew more and more familiar with the reasoning behind his atypical style, and though you would never cease to complain, it was more lighthearted, a habit instead of a genuine gripe.
“You’ll be promoted any day now,” Gojo told you on the last day of your first year — the last day that he would be your director supervisor. “They’re waiting for you to grow a bit older, but it’s maturity you lack, not talent. If you participate in the Exchange Event next year, you’ll get the recommendations you need without a problem.”
“If?” you said, picking up on what he had left unsaid. “Isn’t it mandatory? Why wouldn’t I participate?”
“It’s mandatory if you’re living on campus, yes,” he said.
“And what cause would I have to not be living on campus?” you said.
“You’re interested in curse theory, aren’t you?” he said. When you nodded, he sighed. “Still? I was hoping you’d have moved on by now…well, I can get an alternate course of study approved for you by the principal, if you want.”
“An alternate course? What would that entail?” you said.
“One of my fellow special grade sorcerers, Yuki Tsukumo, specializes in researching the exact types of things you find so fascinating. If she agrees to it, then you could serve as an assistant of sorts to her. It’ll be like an internship or something. She won’t let you slack off — it’ll be much worse than anything I put you through, that’s for certain — but if that’s the path you want to take, then it’s an option,” he said.
You had never loved him quite as much as you did in that moment. Without even taking a moment to think about it, you nodded enthusiastically, beaming at him.
“Yes! Yes, Gojo, sir, that would be ideal. I’ve read some of the proposals Tsukumo’s submitted to the higher ups, and oh, if I got to work with her, it would be such a dream,” you said.
“Don’t get ahead of yourself,” he said. “She still has to agree to it.”
“Do you think she’ll say no?” you said.
“Maybe at first,” he said. “After she meets you, though? No way. You’re my pupil, after all. You’ll be the most impressive student she’s ever taken under her wing — and I can attest to the fact that you’ll be far and away the most dedicated.”
You supposed you had some things to thank him for, then. The corners of your lips twitched as you bowed your head at him, causing him to grunt in confusion; after all, you had never shown him such deference before.
“You’re not that bad as a teacher,” you said. “You know, for it being your first time, I think you did alright.”
“Yeah?” he said eagerly before composing himself, clearing his throat before speaking again. “Yeah, I guess you turned out just fine.”
“Thank you for everything, Gojo,” you said. “Please know that you’ll always have an ally in me.”
His black sunglasses slid down the bridge of his nose, just a bit, but enough that you could see the way his eyes softened ever so slightly. Then he reached out and socked you in the arm affectionately.
“Considering how often I butt heads with the higher ups, I might call upon you one day,” he said. “Don’t make that kind of promise lightly, is what I’m saying.”
“I’m not making it lightly,” you said. “If you call upon me, I’ll come. That’s what you do for someone who’s changed your life, right?”
Even the shades he had shoved back into position could not hide the breadth of his smile nor the depth of his fondness. He nodded, slowly at first and then quickly, like he wanted you to be very sure of his agreement.
“True,” he said, and then he patted you on the head. “Guess that means you can call on me whenever you want, too. I’ll be there.”
You smiled at him over your shoulder as you left for the summer and thought that you might never be so fortunate — or unfortunate — as to have a teacher quite like him again.
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darkwolf989 · 2 days
Text
Outside The Office Part Thirty Eight
I stood on the edge of the clock tower as seconds clicked by below my feet. This was it, this was the final moment before that portal was due to open and the angels came flooding through. Our plan was simple, really. In the chaos of their entry, I would slip through, hopefully unnoticed. 
Earlier when I stretched my wings for the first time since my entry to hell, I was pleased to see the same white fluffy feathers scattered with sharp black waves. Unlike every other angel I knew, my wings were starkly different. At the time, I had been told it was a mutation, nothing to be concerned about. Now I knew the truth. They were marked by the darkness of Hell- darkness that came from my mother. 
“They really are beautiful,” Valentino had told me as I stood before the three of them. 
“A beautiful liability- something you’d do well to remember,” I answered listlessly as Velvette ran a brush over the feathers, whitening away the blackness.
“Do they bleed?” Valentino inquired. “And what do you mean by a liability?”
“Pure angels bleed gold, and if you shoot their wings at the closest point in their back you can render them instantly grounded- its a retraction point. And if you do enough damage, you’ll render them totally useless,” I answered. “I thought I covered this with you. I showed you the diagrams, and the photos.”
“It’s different seeing the real thing,” he replied calmly as he ran his hand down the base of my wings, his fingers slipping into the soft connecting point “Here?”
I tried not to flinch. It was Valentino after all, and this was nothing but a learning opportunity for him.. “yes. There.”
His finger pressed harder and I let out an involuntary yelp, jumping away from both him and Velvette as I recalled my wings. Vox watched from the side with interest. 
“Sorry,” Valentino said softly, “I didn’t realize touching it alone would cause you pain.” 
“I just told you it's a retraction point,” I grumbled as I let them back out slowly. “It’s a defense mechanism, to try and protect them. One winged angels are not exactly a thing. We lose our wings, we’re grounded. And in the military, that's basically a death sentence.”
There was quietness in the room as Velvette brushed the final paint onto my wings. I could see the wheels turning in Vox’s head and Valentino simply looked bothered. 
I swallowed in a desperate attempt to bite back the nerves. “If something happens today, just know I….” 
“Nothing will happen. So don’t be sappy,” Vox snapped. 
Valentino leaned in and kissed my cheek, “he’s right. It hasn’t even been twenty four hours since I married you- so you better come back to hell.” His voice dropped, “I have promises I need to make good on.”
“Keep the kinky shit to yourself,” Velvette said with an eye roll. “Your wings are done. Go, get out there and take your place. We’ll see each other tonight.” 
With a final kiss to Valentino, I opened the sliding glass door and stepped up onto the railing as I took my place on the balcony outside Velvette’s studio. 
“Princessa? Are you sure they work?” I could hear the panic in Valentino’s voice as it came closer. “Maybe we should…”
“Do or die!” I sang out my fathers favorite motto before jumping full force into the sky. 
The feeling of cool night air rushed under my body as I plummeted towards the ground. I didn’t have to think as my wings fluttered, bringing me back up as I hovered on the other side of the railing, inches from Valentino’s face. 
“They work, I knew they would,” I leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Don’t worry Val- and unless they’re actually damaged, or pulled, they’ll save me inherently from any falls.” 
The look on his face didn’t boast relief. Thankfully, Vox stepped up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder. 
“Go, reader. We’ve got seven minutes till midnight and we need to be in our places. Be safe- we’ll see you later,” he said pointedly. 
With his words I took off and landed my feet on the tower. Now, as the final minute clicked by I could feel the energy just on the other side, a strong pulsing. But this time, instead of the lightness I was so accustomed to, I felt nothing but darkness.
This was a different kind of army. 
The red sky ripped open, pouring golden light into hell like lava. Hundreds of thousands of angels descended and I yanked down my mask, took flight, slipping skillfully through the horde of exorcists. As I approached the portal I looked back over my shoulder as the clock bell rang one final time. 
Flashes of blue light snaked up from the ground, jolting into each and every angel as they came closer. I watched the bodies fall, their wings burnt to a crisp. Sickness washed over me. Vox. Vox was the only one who could control electricity like that. 
Pushing the thought from my mind, I did my best to ignore the scent that rose up from the ground as I slid through the portal. In the chaos, no one seemed to give me a second thought as my feet hit the ground. 
I was home. 
Or at least, what used to be my home.
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novembermorgon · 2 months
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do you have a great bastard oc?
i don't ... but wouldn't that be something ! maybe i'll ponder it and get back to that thought anon . could be awesome . if you have any mom-house suggestions feel free to send em over and i can cook something up
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solace-seekers · 4 months
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in my jason feels again….
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primatechnosynthpop · 1 month
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Comic panel redraw because I looove sillygoofy guys dying horribly (but then they get better)
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[ID: a redraw of a panel from the ghostbusters comic "The Other Side". A possessed Peter and several ghosts with guns stand over the bullet-riddled bodies of Ray, Egon, and Winston. The redraw is done in a simpler style with slight tweaks to some designs and poses (most notably Egon's hair being fluffier and the dead men's eyes still being open) and is extended to fit Ray's boots in frame. The ghosts are a lot less defined and more wispy in the redraw, Peter has a scarier grin and a yellowish glow around him, and there's a large pool of blood added under the bodies.
There are two versions of the image, one with the original panel in the upper right for reference, and the other with the lyric "they'd find us in a week" written in red at the bottom. End ID]
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lecliss · 3 months
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I'll never be able to take the theory that Vincent is Sephiroth's real father seriously cuz I cannot stress enough how important I think it is to the plot that Vincent wanted to fuck Lucrecia and did not get to.
#once again i jest but now i have to actually talk about it#like. okay we have no proof of any actual timeline for the dirge flashbacks other than. it was at least 30 years ago#so who knows how long they were at the manor. could have been weeks before The Incident. or months. or maybe a full year! who knows#but to me a timeline of like. they fucked and like a week later vincent found The Evidence and lucercia had her little breakdown#AND THEN EXTREMELY QUICKLY SHE AGREED TO THE EXPERIMENT AND IT COULD GO ONE OF TWO WAYS#1. she knew she was pregnant and thats why she agreed to the experiment cuz there was already a usable subject#and therefore she must have fucked hojo like a week after she fucked vincent AND THATS STUPID FAST FOR THESE EVENTS#or 2. she didnt know. agreed to the experiment. fucked hojo. and therefore thought seph was hojo's and NOT vincent's#AND BY THE WAY. i dont even actually believe hojo fucked either!!! cuz theyre both scientists so why wouldnt they think IVF was the best way#okay. well.... hojo is canonically a fucked up little freak. so. he might have taken the opportunity to... get in there.#also when did ivf even start being a thing? cuz that may play a factor into this if nomura even considered that#well either way lets just unfortunately assume hojo got in there#ITS STILL AN ODDLY FAST TIMELINE#also. fuck man doesnt lucrecia have a later line in dirge where she actually says shes in love with hojo? or something along those lines#IMPLYING ITS BEEN AWHILE SINCE SHE HAD THE FALLING OUT WITH VINCENT. YOU WOULDNT FUCK THE GUY AFTER ALL THAT SHIT#AND WHILE CLAIMING TO LOVE/CURRENTLY FALLING IN LOVE WITH HOJO!!!! LIKE CMON MAN!!!! SHE SUCKS BUT SHES NOT THAT KIND OF A MESS#i dont think vincent would fuck her until they sorted out their issues anyway and that CLEARLY didnt happen.#its VITAL that that did not happen!!!!#its just. if vincent and lucrecia fucked. everything would have had to happen EXTREMELY fast within like a 2 week timespan#and im just talking about up to when vincent learns shes partaking in the experiment. it was probably another week or two until vincent died#SO. logically it must have been like#fall in love->learn about the gimoire incident->refuse to speak to vincent->get obsessed with hojo->fall in love(?)#and then thats where i think its ambiguous on did the experiment become an idea before or after seph started to exist?#like chicken or the egg ya know. experiment idea or sephiroth zygote?#that feels fucked up to say. im so fucking sorry to seph to talk about this. yeah sorry i have to debate who fucked your mom bro#god imagine telling him that. like not even as a reveal thing cuz he knows who his father is. just like as a sick joke. your mom joke.#NO OH M Y GOD I HAVE A QUESTION NOW#in accordance to him having a photo of lucrecia in ever crisis. after he reads that jenova is an ancient (incorrect btw)#does he think that picture is still her? what about when he takes jenova's body from the lab????#oh my god 30 tag limit. FUCK. i need like a rant blog for all this vincent talk now. my brain is going a mile a minute
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toytulini · 4 months
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would be cool this yr to do like first aid training maybe?
#toy txt post#hope i can. get an opportunity to do that. not sure when. the horrors and inability to commit to things u see#but i think i should do that#at some point. altho i feel like i will almost certainly have to do CPR training? and like. like it seems like useful knowledge. and like.#i should know it and maybe im the worst person in existence for this but im a bit of a germaphobe and scared of covid and im not taking my#mask off so like. feels like. that is pretty mutually exclusive with CPR unless thereve been advancements im not aware of?#like would i be able to carry around some sort of billows but for human lungs to do that instead of my mouth? idk. this has in fact been#a legitimate hurdle to me wanting to pursue first aid training. sorry. genuinely dont know how to reconcile that and maybe! in a crisis#situation id overcome it to save a person. genuinely do not know. sorry im like a selfish horrible bitch tho and i cant see myself#doing CPR and am icked by the idea of even learning it. i know now they make those things to put on someones mouth but its still like.#that doesnt do anything against respiratory shit...idk. like is it worse to not pursue any of this at all to avoid the ethical quandry of#not wanting to deal with CPR even as a concept bc im a stupid baby squicked out by lip touching? or is it worse to do first aid and learn#like everything except CPR so i could still theoretically help in some cases that arent necessarily CPR. idk. im sure im just a Bad Person#for this and hate to even admit it. i think i should at least try to find a stop the bleed course or smth ig
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elegyofthemoon · 3 months
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actually scammers taking advantage of the genocide to make money are The Worst People
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supercantaloupe · 7 months
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i had my zoom meeting with maestro and the assistant conductor today to talk about the manager job and it all sounds okay to me (i'll feel more comfortable about the whole arrangement once i can come in and shadow the last two rehearsals this semester and get a feel for the job in person) but it's a little funny how frequently maestro kept assuring me that. well if it sounds like too much work or just not something i am capable of or even want to do it's okay no pressure he'll be fine without me it's totally up to me don't sign on if you aren't absolutely one hundred percent okay with it and even if it's too much let me know because we can adjust the duties and help you out it's okay. and also him being like the pay isn't that good i'm going to try to ask for more money to pay you and the assistant conductor and maybe partially fund you if you go on tour with us next summer but it really should be more pay than this i'm sorry anyway here's like seven other ways you can make a little extra cash through related jobs like arranging extra parts for the orchestra and subbing on english horn as needed and maybe i can find some money for you to write program notes also have you considered teaching at the local music school it's a good way to get your foot in the door and make a little extra on the side sorry it's not much i hope it's okay for you
#and the whole time i'm sitting there like Okay 👍 Thamks#i wanna talk about me#it's very endearing how much he seems to care about me. both my comfort with the responsibilities and the pay haha#he was even like You know maybe if you wanted to take conducting lessons.#(with the lowkey implication of 'you could be assistant conductor in a couple of years too and then i could pay you more LOL)#(and he kind of complained about how the hall and the organization have an assload of cash at their disposal they're just stingy with it ha)#i'm not in it for the money rn really. i mean obviously it would be nice haha#but i'm getting by okay rn with my fellowship and gigs#(and the fellowship means i'm hardly paying anything out of pocket for grad school which is certainly a huge help here haha)#i'm not doing it For The Exposure cause like. idk that sounds trite and also exposure to What. i've known maestro for eight years...#but it IS really good experience for me. a job handed to me by someone who knows and trusts in my work#in my target field of work. with a highly regarded youth orchestra at an amazing concert hall.#i'd be such a shithead to pass that opportunity up!!#it's not about only making a thousand bucks per concert cycle or whatever it's about the experience#and getting to put [redacted] concert hall on my cv. invaluable!!#anyway nervous but cautiously optimistic about next week i'm shadowing the last rehearsal before their december concert#i'll feel much better about the whole job and everything involved once i can experience it in person#i'm a 'learn by doing' kinda guy anyway
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#christ. so i was selected as the top candidate for the program i interviewed with on Friday#and im very annoyed and very pleased and also annoyed that im pleased#im pleased bc it means that they were impressed with what ive done to this point and they think i communicate well. which is cool#and the project is very very cool and id love to work on it#am annoyed bc this does put pressure on me to accept bc they can only put one student forward so if i dip out then thats it for them#which i find extremely stressful. and everything is just so much more complicated if i go to the uk for a phd#and i dont get the luxury of faffing about and taking a bunch of classes like i could in the us. ugh but it would b so cool to go back to#the uk and i wouldn't have to fucking drive. ugh. this project.#ugh its like my boss said#sometimes the project is more worth it than the school. id have crazy cool opportunities to learn things on this project#but at the cost of taking a lot of classes in the us. but every project is what u make of it#but im so fucking dyslexic thst its hard to learn outside a classroom bc i cant concentrate and i dont have a person talking me thru the#info. so idk idk. hopefully when i visit the other school ill kno how i feel#god but i loved living in the uk. and i could travel so much more freely there bc the trains and all that. im so fucking restricted bc im#so terrified of driving. i dont have good reaction speed and i space out too much and i get intrusive thoughts#sigh... but id be a whole 24hrs of travel away from my family instead of the 10hrs thst i am now#so id probably only get to see them once a year maybe? in contrast to 2 or 3 times#and im just worried something terrible will happen and then ill be like fuck i wasted all my time making myself miserable so far away#idk. im so tired. we had like a mile abd a half hike out to a site one way and we left at 7.30 got back at like 4#it was a long fucking day. and im tried. and i have no filter. and when i talk too much it really annoys me#also! i got confirmation that i fucking suck at recording data. wow im so shocked. its basically designed for me to be terrible at#but its still slightly embarrassing. like srry i fucked up ur data. i cant write words correctly#literally i kept writing my Ls upside down today. why? idk that not how i see them. my brain just cant make Language right lol#whatever. my parents r calling tomorrow and i can info dump at them abt my dyslexia knowledge and my academic knowledge of biblical history#bc instead of listening to anything useful to my job. i choose to listen to lectures on neurology and theology. bc fucking idk#its interesting im relearning my bible lore from a non religious perspective. theology is fucking fascinating. ugh anyway#i shoulf sleep im so fucking tried#unrelated
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notjanine · 11 months
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i’ve submitted well over 50 job applications this summer. tell me why the one (1) position i’ve made the most progress toward is one i didn’t even apply for???* and THEN. yesterday. one of my preceptors from the internship i just finished emailed me out of the blue like Hey i'm gonna have an open position at my private practice soon, are you interested?** girl what the fuck is going on here***
#* i was interviewing for a part time gig and halfway thru guy was was like Oh we also have this totally different position you might like!!#(i'm two interviews in and it's got big pros and cons but it's full time with salary good benefits and great opportunities#but the job itself is not exactly my bag#but it also def wouldn't be a long term thing#the woman from the second interview said she'd have one of the current RDs in that role give me a call so i can ask more questions ab it)#** honestly a great opportunity but two things give me pause:#1. i really enjoyed my time with that rotation and my preceptor was SO kind and lovely but#it seemed like we were just communicating on different wavelengths. like i'd ask a question and then she'd give me an irrelevant answer.#she'd give me an assignment and it would take me two or three tries to get what she wanted.#it was all just slightly off. but maybe that's ok bc i wouldn't be doing ASSIGNMENTS if i worked for her. i would be seeing clients#and 2. the pay is weirdly not good. like SIGNIFICANTLY less than comparable listings i've seen#but i applied for all those and got rejected bc i don't have experience lol so maybe it'd be worth it for a little while#just to get my foot in the door#and i think it would be very flexible and i would start off with a small case load anyway so maybe i could just do it part time#while i do something else full time#bc tbh i also want to work as much as i can (without burning out) while i'm here in tx to take advantage of the lack of state income tax#and lbr if i learned anything from my internship experience it's that i hate being bored and i like variety#how great would it be to bounce between like inpatient acute care and outpatient counseling constantly. keep this brain ENGAGED!#*** the gatekeeping in this profession is unfuckingreal#like i KNEW this profession in particular was too much about ~networking~ and ~who you know~ but#i didn't think it would be this fucking bad
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number-1-crush · 2 years
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god i have got to learn how to talk to people i’m attracted to
#uhh update on pretty girl: i think the feelings are mutual 0//0#i’ve had exactly one other conversation with her. them? idk i still forgot to confirm name and pronouns#i was gonna make a genderfluid joke to segue into it but like#i didn’t want to do that when this was our first actual conversation#(our graduating class had to take a photo and we ended up next to each other bc same height roughly)#(and when they had us do a ‘silly pose’ we complained abt not having much arm room (my school is big so there were like 600 of us)#(but then she was like ‘what if we do the heart hands thing’ and !!!! oh my god i could not believe it)#(i was gonna be flabbergasted but i could NOT let her think i was responding negatively and confuse her)#(so i said ‘wait omg that’s so cute let’s do it’)#(and)#(we did)#(and actually i felt like i might collapse i was fully losing my mind(#(i want to find that picture and see us bc i want to see if either of our faces are red)#(maybe i’ll check the school twt. they might have it)#she’s so lovely though. i have to find more ways to talk to her#WITHOUT chickening out bc oh my god pretty girl flirting with me oh my god#turns out i’m kinda skiddish. i mean i learned that freshman year but now i have to actually OVERCOME it#because i don’t want to throw away an awesome opportunity#yayyyyy#anyways. if anyone has pretty girl advice or tips on how to overcome nerves#please give them to me i am already second-guessing about the hand heart thing
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