#michael oliver

[90smovies]

[jjaycore]

yes just let it all out dear

[footballandshit]

[oldcountrybear1955]

Michael Oliver

[sonnys-fan-not-spurs-fan]

Explain this to me, explain this to me 😡

[unitedbydevils]

Match Review: Liverpool 0-0 Manchester United

Well, we didn't get pumped. A very good draw. We'll take that.

Liverpool dominated as we expected, but it was a surprise point and clean sheet for United away at Anfield, as the Red Devils showed a resolution and character we've rarely seen this season.

Andre Onana was huge in net with some big saves, and a clear gulf of impact showed in the stats compared to David De Gea last season in the 7-0 loss.

Some Liverpool fans will argue that the xG of this game being so similar to last season's game is a little off, given that wayward shots do count towards xG. That's a fair point, but the counterpoint is don't be so wasteful. The 7-0 was a freak display of great finishing and triple the xG. This match was the opposite. Things balance themselves out in time.

United, surprisingly captained by Scott McTominay, played a disciplined defensive game that we've not seen from Erik Ten Hag at United until now. ETH is very set on His Way, which is fine, but with so many injuries and so many players out of form, it was about time we tried something different. Results matter. Playstyle comes second.

It wasn't all Liverpool's way either, though it was heavily their game in their hands. The best United chance fell from a good bit of one touch football that put Højlund in on goal with a great chance to snatch a win, but unfortunately the young Dane hit his shot straight at Alisson Becker. A more confident striker probably buries the chance, and whilst Rasmus has scored in the Champions League, a Premier League goal still eludes him - as do passes. Højlund had just four touches in the first half, and stats highlight him - and Martial - as the two strikers with the least passes received in the entire league: a damning indictment of United's creativity and build-up play.

Michael Oliver had to get his name out there at the end, with a quickfire double yellow to Diogo Dalot; first for protesting a throw-in was incorrectly given to Liverpool, and then for protesting his yellow card. VAR can't overrule in that situation, but the league should overturn any suspension that might follow.

Aside from that blip, United did the job. Resolute defending from a fresh Varane, partnered with the experience of Jonny Evans, kept United safe. Dalot put in a shift, and the composure of the midfield duo between Mainoo and Amrabat was very nice to see. Mainoo in particular - at just 18 - showing such calm on the ball away at the enemy, when your club is in a shit run of form and a crisis of confidence... top stuff.

The result means United finally have that draw they were lacking this season in the league, having been the only pro side remaining not to draw a league game. They're also the first side to take a point at Anfield in 2023 and the first side not to concede to them in general this calendar year. Decent that.

As a parting gift to the miser that is Virgil van Dijk, here's a reminder about who else celebrated a draw. Irks me to see a one season wonder mouthing off, and it irked Roy Keane so do check that out.

[adamwatchesmovies]

Problem Child (1990)

Problem Child is the kind of film that inspires theological discussions. A comedy this unfunny either proves there is a God because Satan exists and releases movies under the guise of Dennis Dugan, or proves there is no God because he would never allow such a calamity to befall his children.

A troublemaker from birth, Junior (Michael Oliver) has been adopted and abandoned more times than anyone could count. When kind-natured Benjamin “Ben” Healy Jr. (John Ritter) and his socialite wife, Florence “Flo” Healy (Amy Yasbeck) learn they cannot have children, they adopt the boy. Trouble soon ensues.

It should be enough for me to tell you Problem Child isn’t funny but having survived this harrowing experience, I must say more. I must explain WHY it’s so unfunny. I’ll begin with Michael Oliver as Junior. Child actor or not, he’s awful. None of his lines sound credible and he’s completely devoid of charisma. Witnessing him do one awful thing after another to people who don’t deserve it causes you to loathe him only seconds in. You hate his voice, his would-be smart aleck comments, his choices and actions. You even hate his stupid little face. What worse is how the character is handled. Problem Child can’t decide whether we’re supposed to like Junior or not. We’re presumably supposed to laugh at the misfortune he brings others when setting the Healy house aflame, sabotaging a birthday party, luring a bear to a campsite, attacking children with a baseball bat (cue the nut shots), stealing a car, and generally being a rusty, spiral-shaped turd. In the next scene, he overhears someone talking about how awful he is and sad music kicks in. Which one is it?! Am I supposed to sympathize for Junior, or hope his adopted parents go at him with a chainsaw? You can’t have it both ways!

Anyone who gives Junior the moment of day is repulsive by association. John Ritter as the father is an unbearable wet noodle. The film is so mean-spirited you kind of want him to wind up crushed beneath a collapsed building or skewered by a stray harpoon. The idea that, in time, he and Junior will bond makes you want to throw up. Since he makes your blood boil too now, you'd expect to like his harpy of a wife but her character is just as irritating. She wants a kid so she can go to her neighbors’ parties. I’ve been to children’s birthday parties. Unless you’re participating, they suck. Her motivation makes no sense but why should it? Nothing makes sense in this film. Junior’s sending fan letters to serial killer Martin “Bow-Tie Killer” Beck (Michael Richards), who shows up towards the climax as a way to wrap up a plot that’s had no direction previously. Instead of ending in Dugan's signature false sentimentality, maybe there’s some version of the film that ends in a blood bath. Get me that fan cut.

Up until its very last shot, Problem Child single-handedly annihilates the words “classy” and “funny”. The only good thing about this supposed comedy is that eventually, it ends. (On VHS, April 7, 2020)

[vintagewarhol]

[schlock-luster-video]

On April 19, 1991, Problem Child debuted in Japan.

Here's a new drawing of Michael Oliver as Junior!

[ezrazzle]

After slowly chipping away at this for a while, I'm finally done drawing the cast of The Magnus Archives!

[duranduratulsa]

Now showing on my 90's Fest Movie 🎥 marathon...Forrest Gump (1994) on glorious vintage VHS 📼! #movie #movies #drama #forrestgump #RobertZemeckis #TomHanks #robinwright #GarySinise #mykeltiwilliamson #SallyField #HaleyJoelOsment #hannarhall #michaelconnorhumphreys #sonnyshroyer #dickcave #jasonmcguire #michaeloliver #vhs #vintage #90s #90sfest #durandurantulsas3rdannual90sfest

[90smovies]

[coachtfd]

Michael Oliver, the gift that keeps on taking. 😂 I’m listening to an audio broadcast so at first it sounded like it was a penalty then it wasn’t, it was a dive. 😂🤦🏾‍♂️

[starrynightsoversunflowers]

Tma Avatars Part 2 👁️

Part 1 • Part 3

[mt-nynj-queer]

Photographer Michael Oliver Love and stylist Mandy Nash team up for the latest MMSCENE PORTRAITS.

[verysium]

attractive things bllk characters (unintentionally) do?👀

i received this ask and decided to write this entire thing through a caffeine-powered fever dream. may have gone a little overboard. please pray for both your sanity and mine. thank you anon for your strong sense of imagination (or delusion, whichever you prefer.)

nagi lifts the hem of his shirt to wipe the sweat off his face, and you accidentally (or not so accidentally) get a good look at the droplets running down his abs and v-line. he also does the doorway lean while waiting for you to get ready. since he's so tall, he puts his one arm up on the top of the door frame while scrolling through his phone. when he feels drained of energy, he clings to you like a koala, face buried into the crook of your neck.

rin pushes his hair back when his bangs get in the way, and it shows off his ridiculously sharp side profile. sometimes you have to pause mid-conversation because the direct eye contact gets too intense. he has the brightest turquoise eyes in existence, and they stare right into your soul. pair that with the height difference and him towering over you. hang onto your ovaries because this man is about to snatch them. if isagi or sae are anywhere remotely close within your vicinity, he will personally drag your chair closer over to him. you know, the whole nick jonas chair pull thing? he also unintentionally clenches his jaw when pissed, the vein popping out and everything.

barou is polite to his elders. he holds the door open for others. he tips extra at restaurants. he is kind to service workers. he's just a gentleman overall even though he likes to act tough. he rolls up his sleeves while cleaning or cutting up vegetables, and you can see the veins bulging in his forearms. wears those form-fitting aprons where you can see the outline of his waist and the muscles in his back. he is not immune to raging pit bull moments, but he will calm down immediately when you ask him to.

kaiser requires physical touch to function. all concept of personal boundaries goes poof in his little ego-driven brain. he holds your chin so you look up at him while he's talking. also has that husky growl when he wakes up in the morning. he speaks german. what else is more attractive than that? if you stroke his ego, he will puff his chest out like an emperor penguin and flash that movie star smile. does not slow down his pace for you, and will laugh at your expense when you trip in heels and fall. but then he feels guilty about it and begrudgingly picks you up and carries you home. however, before that he will make you swear on everything holy to never tell isagi about his moment of weakness. (tbh kaiser is a menace and has some serious self-esteem issues. pls avoid dating a man like him in real life until he is fully mature. i still love him tho.)

reo mansplains but not in the condescending way. he does so in the "omg i'm so excited to finally get to share something with you and you're never going to believe it" sort of way. rambles on and on about his interests and gets that little glint in his eye when he's passionate about something. also not sure if this counts but he gets extremely depressed when you don't message him back within five minutes. what do you mean you were busy? he was out here dying from a literal famine. he needs your affection to survive. last but not least, he is good at styling. he knows what colors work best for you, and he will put together three new looks for you in record time.

hiori dreams that you left him for good and wakes up crying with his arms around you. will refuse to let you leave the bed even if it is just to get a glass of water. his rare moments of emotional vulnerability are what gets to you.

shidou does not condone any of your bad decisions. you want to get shit-faced and party until early morning? no complaints from him. you want to wear sexy outfits to the club? say less because he's about to enjoy the view and knock out the front teeth of every guy who dares to ogle you. i don't know if this qualifies as being attractive, but he would never be the controlling type. you can dress and act however you want. unfortunately for you though, this is also a textbook case of the blind leading the blind. if you get horrendously hungover, so does he. if you get pulled over, he's going to be too blackout drunk to even comprehend the officer's words. you can count on him for a good time, but not anything else. do not take any of his advice at face value.

oliver likes to show you off even if he doesn't notice it himself. any talk with his team, and he will find a way to make the entire conversation about you. at this point, the entire u-20 team is done with him. they placed bets that you two wouldn't last more than a month due to his philandering reputation, but the universe seems to think otherwise because you and oliver hit the six-month mark and are still going strong.

ness guards your drink with an unnecessary amount of protection. while you left to go use the restroom, he was looking left and right, and the hairs on the back of his neck were prickling every time someone even came close to your cup. he also shoos away any person who opens their mouth while standing next to your drink because apparently the condensation from their breath could be dangerous. definitely covers your cup with both hands even if it has a lid. no suspicious shit is happening on his watch.

yukimiya is well-read, and he wears glasses. he has a copy of every single classic out there in existence and will fangirl along with you over your virginia woolf collection. he was written by a woman with two cats and a wine glass. not much else to say.

loki absolutely clears the entire carnival/arcade game. you want that giant teddy bear that costs over three hundred ticket points? say less because he's about to win the whole damn pot. of all characters, i would say he's one of the only green flags. like celery green.

isagi always looks for you when he enters the room. intentionally or not, he always seeks your presence. if someone says a funny joke, he turns to you to see if you're laughing or not. also does that somewhat creepy stare thing where he just looks at you quietly while you do mundane tasks. internally he is screaming cus what do you mean you actually like him?

chigiri gives you that thankful little smile whenever you stand up for him. i feel like people don't understand how goofy he can get as he's canonically good at doing impressions/impersonations. also has the prettiest laugh. if he ever cuts his hair, i think i'm going to get a nosebleed.

noa unconsciously says yes to every question you ask of him. he'd be giving bastard münchen a hard time (and denying isagi's requests) but then immediately once you come over, he's automatically acquiescing to everything you say. the rest of the team is low-key shocked you can win him over so easily. when they confront him about it, he just shrugs and goes "y/n is always right."

kurona's entire existence is attractive. he's just perfect. nothing is ever wrong with him. will let you check out his shark teeth and lightly pokes your finger to leave an imprint. hopefully you'll always remember him that way. he's also quiet so he will listen to everything you say and give ample weight to your words.

sae is my baby girl so he gets a whole section dedicated to himself:

absentmindedly plays with your hair. when you're sleeping in his lap, he'll gently run his fingers along your scalp. sometimes in the morning when you're sitting up on the edge of your bed to do your makeup, he'll come up from behind you and brush back your hair. might also press a kiss to the back of your neck.

helps you put on your face mask. when he's shopping, he will buy you lotion along with his own skincare products. says that it was just a convenient store run but you know he personally made sure to get you the best quality ones.

this is canon because i said so: when he gets out of the shower, he slings the towel over his neck or his shoulder. he also involuntarily flexes his biceps when he bends down to grab something. has the world's most defined deltoids.

when you're stuck in large crowds at the airport, he puts his hand in your back pocket to keep you two from getting separated. if the TSA pat-down is anywhere too personal for his liking, he will openly glare at the officer once you've passed the security checkpoint.

bonus point: when you two brush your teeth early in the morning, he has that little bed head where his shorn-off bangs stick up in cute little tufts here and there. will have a dead look on his face, but his eyes soften when he catches your gaze through the mirror.