#might not be on today i've got work but i love you loads and thank you so much for being here and sorry for the negativity

[lucy90712]

Hey so for Jude Bellingham can you write like Jude cheating on reader, he is very distant with her and she tries to make plans or asks him things like how has ur day been but he either just gives her blunt replies or just completely ignores her. Reader finds out he cheated on her via his phone and she confronts him and she admits it. Then reader leaves him and moves on with someone else (not a footballer just someone random) and Jude regrets what he has done but it is too late. Like pure angst and please make it long! Thank you!

A/n: the timeline on this doesn’t really work but just ignore that

Part 2

Sitting in a restaurant alone waiting for someone to show up is embarrassing. It's even more embarrassing when people know who your boyfriend is and are very clearly judging you and thinking about what might be going on in your personal life. Then the most embarrassing part of it all is having to leave after sitting there for an hour. 

No text no call and no answer. After getting home from the restaurant I stayed up for as long as possible to try and wait for Jude to come home so I could ask him why he didn't show up to the date he planned and invited me on but by 3am he still wasn't home. The next morning he wasn't in bed but he had clearly been home and then left for training but he still hadn't even read the texts I sent him last night. He did post on his Instagram story which explained where he was, he was at a party with all of his friends. I'd love to say that's the first time he's done this but it isn't in fact he's done it countless times in the last few months. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Valentine's Day

Two hours ago I got ready in a cute dress and did my makeup ready to go out to dinner with Jude. He's been so busy recently so we haven't spent much time together but he promised me we'd spend Valentine's Day together, he got us a reservation at my favourite restaurant and told me to dress up. That's exactly what I did now I'm sat here still waiting for him to get home two hours after when he said he'd be home. 

It hurts to be left just waiting I was looking forward to tonight and getting to spend some time together as I've missed having him around. He made this move to Madrid out to be the best thing for us but ever since things just haven't been the same. He's always busy and when he's not he chooses to spend time with his teammates instead which I understand but at the same time he's neglecting me and our relationship. I tried to bring this up but he shut me down and promised to spend more time with me which is how we ended up with this date but clearly it's not that important to him. 

Close to 3 hours later Jude finally came home and looked at me incredibly confused when he saw me all dressed up. 

"Where are you going?" He asked 

"On a date with you remember you said we would go out for dinner because it's Valentine's Day" I said 

"I'm so sorry baby I completely forgot this week has been crazy I promise I'll make it up to you another day but I'm so tired is a movie night instead ok" he said 

"Yeah its ok" I lied 

Birthday 

As always I woke up to an empty bed and Jude having left for training. Today isn't any normal day though it's my birthday so all my friends are coming over and we are going to go out for lunch together then hopefully Jude and I can do something together this evening even if it's just watching something together on the sofa. When I grabbed my phone from my bedside table I had loads of messages from friends and family wishing me a happy birthday and my social media was filled with edits done by Jude's fans which were all so sweet. The only notable missing thing was a text from Jude but that's ok he might've been running late and forgot. 

I forgot about Jude as soon as my friends arrived as they all spoiled me far too much but I had so much fun with them. It was nice to be distracted from real life and stop worrying about when Jude will be home, if he will remember it's my birthday or if he still cares about me at all. Once I got back home Jude's car was already in the driveway so I smiled and happily made my way inside to see him. I wasn't expecting Vini and Eduardo to be over but there they were sat on the sofa playing video games with Jude. 

"Hey y/n happy birthday" Vini said 

"I didn't realise it was your birthday Jude didn't mention it but happy birthday" Eduardo said 

"Thanks guys" I said 

"Where have you been babe?" Jude asked still not saying happy birthday 

"I was with my friends they took me to lunch" I said 

"That sounds fun" Jude said going right back to his game 

His friends tried to leave saying he should spend time with me but he said it was fine and that I wouldn't mind so they stayed. While they all sat down stairs having more fun than I was I did some work with tears streaming down my face. My own boyfriend doesn't care about my birthday his teammates cared more than he did. 

Anniversary 

"Happy anniversary love" I said when I found Jude in the kitchen this morning 

"Happy anniversary" he said 

I tried to give him a kiss but he dodged it and went to start packing his things as he has an away game later today so he's leaving soon. 

"I'm sorry baby I've got to go I'll see you later though" he said as he left leaving me all alone yet again 

~~~~~~~~~~

Today is a day I always like to forget. Both of my parents died in a car accident two years ago today so it's always an emotional day for me and my siblings, we would like to spend it together to distract ourselves but as I'm in Madrid we can't do that. Instead my friends invited themselves over so that I'd have someone with me which made me feel so much better. They came over early so early that Jude was still here as he hadn't left for training yet. He was doing his own thing as the girls all sat with me and let me get out all my emotions now by telling them memories I have with my parents. 

"You know they'd be so proud of you" one of my friends said 

"I just wish they were here to see all the things me and my siblings have done all thanks to their constant encouragement" I sniffled tears still falling down my face 

"Why are you crying babe?" Jude asked as he walked down the stairs 

"Just thinking about my parents it's the anniversary of their death so I'm just a bit emotional" I said 

"I'm glad the girls are here to make you feel better then I'll see you later ok" he said 

With that he left and my friends all looked at me with an expression I didn't quite understand.

"How long has he been like that?" My best friend asked 

"Like what" I questioned 

"Like you don't matter he didn't even hug you before he left even after you told him why you were upset which he should know anyway dates like this are important for partners to remember" she said 

"I mean it's been a good few months he missed our Valentine's Day dinner he didn't wish me a happy birthday until like 5pm and we didn't do anything on our anniversary" I said finally thinking about how badly he's been treating me

"Girl he doesn't deserve you he's taking you for granted and you don't deserve that" one of the girls said 

"I hate to say this but you need to break up with him clearly he's given up on your relationship and now I might be wrong but wrong but it seems to me like he's found someone else" another said

They were right for months now I've been at the bottom of his priority list and he's nowhere near the Jude I used to know and love. There is no affection there anymore it's like the love we once had is gone. He also has definitely been distant and he's never home so there is a possibility that he could be cheating on me. That's a thought that I'd put in the back of my mind and didn't want to think about but now that someone else that has mentioned it I can't let the thought go. Whether he's cheating or not things definitely aren't how they used to be and I need to get out of this relationship before it's too late. The girls all offered their support and said I can stay with them for as long as I need which gave me the confidence to actually talk to Jude later today. 

When Jude arrived home all the girls left and they wished me good luck which I definitely need as I'm nervous to actually have this conversation even though it needs to be done. Jude went straight to get in the shower so I decided to look at his phone because he told me the password but I have never used it as I trusted him at least until now. It took just seconds of looking for me to find texts between him and this one girl who he had clearly been seeing for months now. He kept saying he would break up with me but the time wasn't right yet and that he wasn't in love with me anymore which hurt to see. I wanted to cry but I held back my tears and instead just sent myself screenshots of everything and then deleted the evidence so he wouldn't know that I knew. 

After his shower Jude took ages to come back downstairs but when he finally did he was looking at his phone and smiling it made me wonder if he was talking to her the girl he'd apparently fallen for. He quickly noticed me staring at him and he just stared back not having a clue what was going on. 

"Jude we need to talk" I said 

"Oh ok is everything alright?" He asked 

"I'm just gong to say it I know what you've been doing and don't lie to me I have screenshots I just want to know when you fell out of love and why you did this instead of just ending things" I said barely holding back tears 

"I don't know it all just happened I'm sorry I should've handled this better I didn't want to hurt you but clearly I haven't done a good job of that" he said 

"Yeah you really have hurt me I should've known when you forgot about our valentines reservations but I was foolish and believed that you were just busy now I know you were with another girl" I said 

"I'm sorry" he said 

"I don't believe you Jude if you were sorry you wouldn't have let this go on for so long it's safe to say we are over I wish you well but please don't try and contact me again I need to just move on" I said 

With that I gathered my things and just left. I left my key, the memories and what felt like half my heart but it had to be done I had to get out of there before I got hurt any more. It's time to move on and start a new life with people around me who truly care about me. 

~~~~~~~~~~

1 year later 

"Come on amor let's go" Carlos called from downstairs 

"Coming" I said running down the stairs 

"Oh wow you look gorgeous" Carlos said 

"Thank you you look good too" I said 

He kissed my cheek and grabbed my hand so we could head out to the car that was outside to pick us up. Just a few days ago Carlos won the French open so we are going out to celebrate. I met Carlos not long after I broke up with Jude I wasn't even looking to date but I just happened to meet him on a night out with my friends and we just clicked. He understood that I wasn't ready to date properly but he didn't give up on me so when I was ready we went on a date and the rest is history. My plan definitely wasn't to date another athlete in fact I wanted to just have a normal life and date a normal guy but I couldn't just let Carlos go and I'm glad I didn't. We have been together officially for 6 months now and they have been the best 6 months of my life he always treats me right and he makes it known how much he loves me. 

Carlos has a lot of friends in Madrid so he decided to come here and celebrate his win with me and my friends as well as his before he goes back home to be with his family. There wasn't really any time to prepare anything so we are all just meeting at a club in town that isn't just open to the public so there shouldn't be lots of people there. All our friends were already there when we arrived as we got caught in a bit of traffic but they didn't seem to mind our lateness they congratulated Carlos on his win and we all went inside. 

As we walked down the stairs all my friends turned to me at once and I wondered what was going on for a second until I saw what they had seen. Jude was right there along with a few of his teammates. I haven't seen him since our breakup which is somewhat of a miracle seeing as I still live and work in Madrid and he has become part of the city. I knew one day we'd meet again I was just hoping it wouldn't be in a day like today I don't want to be thinking about him or to talk to him while celebrating Carlos as tonight shouldn't be about me or my past relationship. Carlos knows everything that happened so once he saw Jude his hand reached for mine and he gave it a comforting squeeze which made me feel a little bit better. The thing is I don't miss Jude at all I'm so much happier now but what he did still hurts me so seeing him for the first time since is a bit painful. 

"We can go somewhere else if you want" Carlos said 

"No it's ok tonight is your night plus he shouldn't affect my life now that's the past you are my present and future" I said 

"Ok as long as you're sure but you are sticking by my side all night" he said 

Jude's POV

"Is that y/n?" Vini asked 

Him saying that caught my attention so I looked in the same direction as him and there she was with all her friends and a guy by her side. I recognised the guy as Carlos Alcaraz the tennis player who just won the French open and a the guy y/n has been dating for at least the last few months. I found that out when late at night after we lost a big game I stalked her Instagram and saw a photo of them together on her private account that she forgot to remove me from. Since that night I have kept an eye on her Instagram I usually check it at least once a week to see what she's been doing and how happy she is without me. 

Since the night that she broke up with me I regretted making all the dumb choices I made that led to that point. Within days I broke things off with the other girl I was seeing and I have been alone ever since I just can't bring myself to see anyone else because they aren't y/n. It sounds stupid because I'm the one that ruined everything I'm the reason she's with Carlos and not me but she was the one I just didn't realise how much I loved her until she was gone. My mum has always told me not to take things for granted as once they are gone you'll realise their true value and that's exactly what I did with y/n I didn't realise just how important she was to me until I made some stupid decisions and let her go. 

I watched her with Carlos for a while and she seemed genuinely happy which made me realise that she hadn't been that happy with me for a long while before we broke up. It was clear to see that she loved him and I could tell that he loved her too because he looked at her the way I did when we first got together. It hurt to see her so happy with someone else because I know I could've had that but now I won't get to share any moment like that with her ever again. I deserve everything that has come to me I made bad choices and as much as I regret them now it won't change anything. 

I have to let her go because for her to be happy I need to not be in her life as much as that hurts. They say if you love her let her go and that's what I need to do let the one go because as much as she might've been the one for me I'm not the one for her. 

[scarletwinterxx]

your day - dad mark lee scenario

hi🥺 okay so first of all sorry it took me so long to write this, I swear I've been working on it since the day i got the request but the rest of the story wasn't coming to me and i didn't want to put out something I didn't love. but here it is😊🥺 i missed the Lee family too, hope you like it!!!

part1: day with dad mark lee

part2: another day with dad mark lee

part3: a day with the lee's

part4: (prologue) i don't know how to make eggs

part5: glitter pens and goodnight kisses with the Lee's

part6: first love and kisses

part7: naps and baby kicks

part8: then there was three

part9: just like you

part10: fool for you

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.

(gif not mine, credits to rightful owner)

The waiting game began a week ago, originally the 3rd Lee baby was suppose to come early May but the due date came and passed but no baby still.

Since it's your third baby you don't feel as nervous but Mark can't really say the same. He even made sure to have all the stuff you'll need at the hospital already loaded in the car along with the baby's car seat.

"You think it might happen tonight?" he asks, nose touching your belly like he can't wait to be close to his baby

"How will they get the baby out?" Minjee asks, she sitting right beside her dad watching your belly too.

"Me and mommy will go to the hospital, then the smart and kind doctor and nurses will help mom" Mark explains as kid friendly as possible

While you listen to the two, Minjung stays beside you quiet on his seat. "You'll be okay, right mom?" he asks you

You smile sweetly at your boy, ever the caring one. "Of course, I will be. Don't worry about it okay? Remember when Minjee was born, this time you can come together" you tell him, giving him a side hug. Your son stays tucked by your side while the daddy-daughter duo make chatters on their own.

"Okay everyone, I think it's time for bed. Mommy might be tired now" Mark tells the kids, picking Minjee up from the bed making the little girl laugh out loud on their way out the room.

Minjung stays behind, waiting to say something to you

"Mommy, I have something to tell you"

"What is it, love?"

"Happy Mother's Day, if I'm reborn again I want you to be my mom again" he tells you, this made you want to burst out into tears

"It's tomorrow but thank you, and I would love to be your mom again and again. I love you, always. Okay?" you open your arms and hug him. Giving him kisses, "My sweet sweet boy, when did you grow up so big like this? Don't grow up anymore" you joke, Minjung laughs at this. He bids goodnight then goes out the room to get ready for the night.

Mark comes back to your room a few minutes later to also get ready for bed, you've already finished yours so you're just waiting for him

"You good there, baby?" he asks while watching you get comfy with your pregnancy pillow. He wishes he can do more for you but for now all he can you is attend to your every need while you carry his child.

It's the third time but he's still very much in awe of you, he thinks it's the most wonderful thing to be growing a human that his and yours. He can't do much about the 'growing a human inside your body' part of it, but he makes sure you're very well taken care of.

"Yep, just tired from today. Are the kids asleep?"

"Yea, they're excited to give your their cards for tomorrow. Don't tell them I told you though"

You let out a chuckle at that, "I'll make sure to look very surprised"

You feel him move from behind you, then he kisses you on the head "Goodnight, baby. I love you" Mark mumbles, giving you a few more kisses and a hug

"Mhm, love you too"

You woke up a few hours later from a sharp pain on your stomach, sitting up carefully on the bed you wait a few moments to get your bearing together when you feel it again

"Mark" you say but the man beside you doesn't move

"Mark" you shake him again but still he's dead as a rock

"Lee Minhyung" you say a bit louder, waking you husband up

"Wha- what what's happening?" Mark sits up confused, one eye still closed

"I think the baby is coming"

"Oh shit, okay uh what do you need? Are you in pain? We should go get dressed"

"Mark"

"The stuff is already in the car, where are my keys though. Should I get you a hoodie? Snacks? I should probably call your doctor"

"Mark"

"Don't panic, we've done this before"

"I'm not really panicking though" you mumble while watching your husband scramble around the room

"Careful, love. You're gonna wake the kids up" you tell him when he tripped on his own feet, it's after midnight so the kid are fast asleep

"Oh right, I should call Haechan to watch them. My parents won't arrive until tomorrow. Where the heck is my phone"

"LEE MINHYUNG" your loud call got his attention, halting his frantic actions

"Breath, baby. You're panicking. Now can you get me one of your sweatpants and a jacket too, then call Haechan. Your phone is right there, the keys is by the door. Breath" you tell him, getting on your feet to get ready also

Mark follows your instructions one by one, if he doesn't he's afraid he might start freaking out again. He helps you down the stairs when you're both ready and wait for Haechan to arrive.

You're not feeling the pain anymore but your belly did get more tense, taking careful steps to the kitchen you grab some snacks for later while Mark checks on the kids before leaving.

The front door open, followed by Haechan calling out for Mark

"He's upstairs, checking on the kids" you answer when Haechan walks in the kitchen

"Aren't you in labor?" he points at you

"I think, I hope. This baby is due so let's hope today is the day"

Mark then arrives, checking if you need anything else before leaving Haechan instructions "Hyung, seriously I got this. I have a kid too" Haechan chuckles

"I know, but Nari is an angel. My Minjee, I can't say the same" you laugh at Mark's words

"She's unpredictable" Haechan says "She's like you, I have a kid like you. Causing me all kinds of trouble" Mark says making you and Haechan laugh

"I got it, I'll watch the kids"

"Sorry if we ruined your mother's day plans, Mark's parent's will be here early morning tomorrow. Thanks again, Hyuck" you tell him while walking towards the door with Mark assisting you

"Don't worry about it, wifey and Nari will come here for breakfast so it's all good. Your kids love me too so it's a win win"

"Thank you again"

"Happy mother's day, Y/N" he smiles at you, giving you a quick hug and Mark a pat on the back.

The drive to the hospital was quiet, a few more contractions every once in a while but nothing you couldn't handle. You got admitted to a room with no trouble and a nurse came to check on you and the baby.

"What a way to celebrate mother's day huh" Mark says, currently he's sitting beside you giving your back a gentle rub as another contraction hits you.

"How are you gonna beat this gift next year" you joke

"Let's get this baby here first then we'll talk" he humors you

A few more hours of waiting when a doctor comes in, "Hello Mrs. Lee, Mr. Lee"

"Everything looks good with you, but there's seem to a little hiccup"

"What? What's wrong? Is the baby okay?" the moment you heard the 'but' your heart started to beat faster

"All good, it's just the baby is currently feet first. Meaning they are not facing the way they're supposed to be. And since your contractions started hours ago and your water already broke, we're in a countdown here before it gets dangerous for you and the baby"

You're at lost for words so you turn to Mark, his hand is holding your the entire time to provide comfort. He looks at you then looks at the doctor again, "What do we need to do? Just please keep my wife and my baby safe"

"I'm afraid she has to get an emergency c-section"

"Mark" you mumble, "Hey hey it's okay, I'm here" he tells you

"We'll get the OR ready for you, a nurse will come here to get some papers signed and get Y/N ready for surgery. We'll do our best to keep her and the baby safe"

It all happened so fast. The doctor exits the room, you didn't even get a few moments before a few nurses enter the room. One talking to Mark about the surgery and a few helped you get ready.

They wheel the bed out of the room, Mark still right beside you.

"Hey, I'll be right beside you the entire time. I know this isn't part of the plan but you can do it" he kisses you on the head

"I'm scared" you say for the first time and this breaks Mark's heart. He wishes there was a way to transfer your pain to him, he'd take it all for you.

"I know, baby. I won't leave okay? I'll be with you. You'll be fine" he assures you. No matter how many times your doctor and all the nurses assured you you'll be fine, only Mark's got you to calm down a bit.

They got you ready for the surgery while Mark waits outside, waiting for one of the nurses to call him. When he got the go signal, he walks in to see you lying down with a curtain in the middle blocking the view of the doctors and nurses helping to get the baby out

"Hey you, how are you feeling?" he asks quietly, running his thumb on your cheek to give some comfort

"Scared, but better now you're here. I just want the baby to come out safe and healthy" you tell him

"They're working on it now, tell me if you're feeling anything weird okay?"

"Mark baby, I'm literally cut open right now while they're trying to get your kid out of me" you joke

"You know what I mean, glad to hear you cracking a joke at a time like this"

You smile at your husband, even though you're really scared right now seeing him and knowing he's there for you is enough to ease your mind. You trust Mark to make sure you're going be all right.

"Okay, the baby's here just a moment okay I see the feet, body out a little more" you hear your doctor say then in a few seconds you hear it

"head out, baby's here and it's a boy. Look momma look" the nurses put the curtain down to show the baby, Mark helped you lean your head up to see. Both of you getting teary eyed, you look over at Mark to see him looking at the baby with the familiar lovestruck look in his eyes.

Seeing him like this, to witness him being the best father to your kids everyday, like life is being brought into him at this very moment is making you think every moment is worth it no matter how scary it is. You love being the mother of his kids as much as he loves being a father to them.

Mark then looks at you, tears already falling down his cheeks "We have another boy, oh my gosh. You did so so good baby, I'm so proud of you. He's perfect" he leans down to kiss you on the cheek

"It's a healthy baby boy, dad would you mind walking here to cut the cord"

While the doctor finishes surgery, Mark stands on the side with baby boy. They hand him the little bundle of joy after checking everything, "You can hold him while we wait for mom, then we can stay in the recovery room then someone will come and check again on baby and mommy. When we get the clearance, you can go back to your room" the nurse explains

The baby in Mark's arm fusses but Mark expertly hushes and rocks him, his son immediately finding comfort in his father's arm

"You're an expert" the nurse compliments him

"We got two more at home" he proudly says

A few hours passed before you got the okay signal to go back to your room. The baby is currently sleeping in his crib while you get some rest. You didn't expect to feel this tired after surgery but you feel so drained

Mark went outside to get some food for you and him, you weren't really asleep you were just resting your eyes when you heard the door open and close

"Oh shit, you're asleep" you hear your husband mumble

"Language, there's a baby there" you tell him, opening your eyes only to see him holding a big bouquet of flowers

"Happy Mother's Day, my love" he walks towards you, putting the flowers down somewhere safe before handing you a paperbag

"What's this?"

"Your mother's day gift and push present"

"I thought that was my push present" you point your lips at the sleeping baby

Mark chuckles, urging you to open the bag. You carefully do so, feeling a velvet box inside "Minhyung, what is this?"

"Open it" he smiles at you, he watches you flip the box open. Inside is a ring somewhen similar to your engagement ring with a few details different

"Mark Lee, you did not. This is-" "You deserve it, baby. Plus we've always talked about giving your rings to your son someday and since we have two sons now I thought you will need another ring"

"Did you really buy this and hope for a boy?" you joked

"Nah, I have a back up just in case"

"I can't believe it, we have two boys. I know Minjung will be so excited, but Minjee will be elated to know she's still the only princess"

Mark chuckles at that, seating gently by your side while the two of you watch your newborn son.

"He got your nose, it's so cute" he mumbles "Got your cheeks though, just like Minjung and Jee, I hope he got your eyes too. I love your eyes" you tell him, resting your head on his shoulder

"You tired? go get some rest, baby. I'll take care of him, let me know too if you're feeling anything okay?" he tells you, helping you settle on the bed

"Mark, I love you"

He looks down at you, getting cozy on the bed with your drowsy but beautiful eyes he loves so much. "I love you more, baby. I'm so proud of you, you superwoman"

"Couldn't have done it without you"

"You would've have, you could but you don't have to. As long as I'm here you don't have to do anything by yourself. I know you're the strongest and bravest woman, and I'm in awe of you everyday. But in this lifetime, you got me always" he leans down, giving you sweet kiss.

"Oh and I thought of a name for him"

"Do tell, my lady" he indulges you. You actually named all of your kids, ofcourse you tell him first to make sure you both like it. But he leaves it up to you, his reason being the kids will get his surname anyways so he lets you think of their names, Minjung and Minjee.

"Minsu, I read somewhere it means gentle. Minjung, Minjee and Minsu" you smile at your kids' name

"Minjung, Minjee and Minsu Lee. I love it"

"Really?"

"Mhm, you got four Min's now" he smiles

"Is it too obvious I love you so much?"

"Nah, I think the three kids is kinda telling I love you more. Who knows, we'll have a fourth one" he jokes

"Lee Minhyung!"

[ghostofbambifanfiction]

CYOA C57 Sneak Peak

Since I took a not-so-brief break from writing and it still might be another few days before I can post the next chapter, have a sneak peak of the beginning of the chapter below the cut.

Private WhatsApp Chat Resumed: Wednesday 16th March, 2022, 01:37 Members: Lily Evans, James Potter

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Lily Evans: <image attachment> You're hopefully asleep but look at what I've got!

...

Private WhatsApp Chat Resumed: Wednesday 16th March, 2022, 07:11 Members: Lily Evans, James Potter

================================

James Potter: omg it's my face mug

Lily Evans: Yep! Plus my tea, which really got me through the morning since I came in an hour early to get a site report finished. I employed cunning stealth tactics to manoeuvre it out of Pip's desk drawer yesterday.

James Potter: what did you do?

Lily Evans: I said, "Pip, can I have James's face mug?" and that worked.

James Potter: truly you are machiavellian in your endeavours also are you wearing bright pink in that photo?

Lily Evans: I am. Felt slightly daunted about it this morning because of the stupid old adage about redheads, but I mean, I BOUGHT the outfit on Monday because I loved how it looked on, so chickening out would have been a waste of my money.

James Potter: what's the old adage about redheads?

Lily Evans: There are MANY and they're all equally ridiculous because being redheaded is great actually, but this one in particular dictates that we "shouldn't wear pink," presumably because it looks terrible on us.

James Potter: that IS stupid you look so pretty

Lily Evans: Thank you! <image attachment> This is the full fit. I love Sirius's selfie mirror. What d'you think?

James Potter: christ you really do have phenomenal legs warn me next time, would you? i'm trying to drink my morning coffee in peace here, and you spring this on me

Lily Evans: Lollll you saw my legs on my Instagram yesterday.

James Potter: yesterday you had big tall boots on today you do not

Lily Evans: Forget about my legs for a second.

James Potter: i physically CAN'T

Lily Evans: The jacket is a CAPE, James. I own a CAPE. I am MAKING MY OWN DREAM (of owning a cape) COME TRUE. Do you have any idea how many crop tops I bought on Monday? LOADS. And I've been scared of crop tops my whole life. I still kind of am scared, but I'm going to be brave and wear them anyway, Bea says that if I carry myself with confidence on purpose I'll eventually start to carry myself with confidence because that's genuinely how I feel, and you know what she's right because I've had more compliments from other women in the office over the last day and a half than I've had in the year since I started working here. If you can't tell, I'm very excited about my new clothes.

James Potter: i can tell

Lily Evans: It's probably a very boring topic so I'll stop.

James Potter: no you don't have to stop i think it's brilliant and not just because i get to see more of your legs, which is a huge win for me

Lily Evans: Lolllllllll

James Potter: a week ago you were calling yourself a frump, so it makes me happy to see you talking like this instead if new clothes make you feel good about yourself then i want to hear about them

Lily Evans: I do feel more like ME in them, if that makes any sense at all. And there's no going back now because I've bagged up a load of my old clothes and Bea and Remus are going to help me lug them to the charity shop before we all head off to the train station on Saturday. I bought A LOT of new things. Like, so much I felt a bit obscene every time it came to pay. But I couldn't have done that if you hadn't spared me from paying rent for the next few months, so thank you so much for being a bottomless well of kindness, even though I should be saving that money for a deposit on a new flat and have had no common sense in my approach to this.

James Potter: don't worry about it, you deserve bottomless wells of kindness and of every good thing in life are you going to leicester with remus and beatrice this weekend?

Lily Evans: No, although I'm going the Saturday after for a pre-Mother's Day lunch with my mum and Petunia. I'm heading to Stockport to spend the night at Emily's, it just so happens that Bea and I both need to leave from Euston. Actually, first I'm getting my hair done, then I'm donating my clothes, THEN I'm going to Stockport to see Em. Then I'm going wall climbing with her and her mum and sister.

James Potter: oh cool! i love climbing, have you ever done it before?

Lily Evans: I went to a climbing centre once for a friend's birthday party years ago, I was twelve and I got my first period while I was actively on the wall, so I spent quite a lot of the day running into the toilet to check that nobody could see it even though I was wearing black shorts and Carina's mum had given me a pad. So the short answer is: not really, but I'm not worried, none of them are expecting me to be any good at it even though they're all basically professionals. Em and her sister also go cycling every Sunday morning so I have been informed that a loaner bike and safety gear is available if I want to join them.

James Potter: do you think you will go?

Lily Evans: Yeah! I haven't cycled in a few years but I do cardio every day so I reckon I can manage the exercise even if I wind up extremely saddle-sore afterwards. Plus this all means I get to bring and wear some of my new workout clothes, and honestly I'll take any excuse.

James Potter: if you put some chamois cream on before you cycle you'll save yourself a lot of discomfort little tip from my mum that i flagrantly ignored in my youth

Lily Evans: Why did you ignore it?

James Potter: because i was A MAN who didn't NEED to smear cream on my groin to train for a triathlon except it turns out i did also i was only about sixteen, who the fuck did i think i was, cat noir?

Lily Evans: I'm going to skim past the fact that you know who Cat Noir is because then I'll need to explain why I know who he is and it's probably the same reason.

James Potter: it's definitely the same reason

Lily Evans: God, we're both such dweebs. I mean, you're much cooler than I am, but still.

James Potter: not true at all, i'm a massive dork, i just happen to play a lot of sports, so people who don't know me well don't spot it straight away

Lily Evans: And you're stupidly attractive, which isn't often expected of massive dorks because we live in a society that unfairly pigeonholes people into boxes based upon their perceived attractiveness. This I say as I shop for makeup online. I know I'm part of the problem.

James Potter: what does "stupidly" attractive mean? i'd love a definition

Lily Evans: You already defined it yourself. Weeks ago, actually.

James Potter: what??? when?

Lily Evans: "And now," gasped Theo, in a ruggedly handsome but also charmingly boyish but also sexy but also dorky way that seems really impossible for a real human man to accomplish, "I will kiss you at last!" See? Defined. As per you. Also important to note: this kind of attractiveness makes people who fancy you act and feel like blushing, giggling idiots. Hence, "stupidly" attractive.

James Potter: well

Lily Evans: Your brother, on the other hand, is NOT stupidly attractive. He's inaccessibly attractive. Which is very different. Science.

James Potter: noooo don't talk about sirius! talk about me again!

Lily Evans: I just did. At length.

James Potter: talk about me more who am i making blush and giggle?

Lily Evans: How quickly you forget that I still field emails from Jessalyn et al.

James Potter: oh it's JESSALYN, is it?

Lily Evans: Et al.

James Potter: i think you should elaborate on et al

Lily Evans: I'd love to but I have to jump into a meeting.

James Potter: no you don't!

Lily Evans: Yes I do!

James Potter: a meeting with who?

Lily Evans: With Agnes from Julia Murphy.

James Potter: who is agnes from julia murphy

Lily Evans: Julia Murphy is a skincare company, one of our brand partners, and it's in my calendar, see?? <image attachment> I'm not trying to get out of telling you I think you're cute.

James Potter: two minutes ago i was ruggedly handsome and charmingly boyish and sexy now i'm merely cute?

Lily Evans: And dorky. Don't forget dorky.

James Potter: i haven't forgotten anything, thank you very much

Lily Evans: James, you are ruggedly handsome and charmingly boyish and sexy. Are you happy now?

James Potter: that reply will do, but only because you're busy you're off the hook for now but i expect you to revisit this subject later

Lily Evans: God, who even are you, my owner?

James Potter: that's an interesting choice of words, lil

Lily Evans: DON'T YOU DARE ANSWER THAT QUESTION

[aching-tummies]

Mm but what about hands squeezing and prodding your whipped cream filled belly making all the cream expand even more. Groaning trying to tell them that it's not helping and you feel as tight as a drum but they won't listen. " it'll help trust me" but every squeeze and prod puts way too much pressure on your tummy only making it expand even more till you feel like your stomach might burst as they come up from behind and wrap both arms around you

Response to 'Whipped Topping; Whipped Tum'.

Thank you for this lovely, response. I was blushing while reading it and the whole time I wrote this response to it. I hope it's to your liking ^^

“Phew.” I let out a sigh as I flop onto the couch.

The dryer is working on the latest load of laundry and the dish-washer is loaded and waiting to be turned on. I usually prefer running the dish-washer right before bed—allowing for last-minute additions of utensils or forgotten lunch containers as well as ensuring that we don't get charged 'peak-hour' water-usage fees.

I've been bustling about around our place since coming home. Today was a day off and I spent the first half of it treating myself to a day out window-shopping and whatever. Refreshed from the long-awaited 'me-time', I came home ready to tackle the household tasks that are just a part of being a responsible person. All work and no play, right? A couple of ours out on the town topped off by feeding my chocolate craving renewed my patience for the daily grind and got me about four hours of productivity around our space. I dusted our window coverings, wiped down the windowsills, collected and systematically completed two different loads of laundry, and loaded our dish-washer—among other things.

Grr...rrrk.

I wince as I feel my belly quaking, hands going over to rest on my unusually bloated belly. That's the sight you walk into upon coming home from work.

“Oohh...” I moan as a foreign hand joins mine, pressing firmly on the crest of my belly in lieu of a normal 'hello, I'm home'. I swat at the offending hand, but that only encourages you to flex your fingers into the taut flesh, squeezing my distended belly in your palm.

GrRrRrlLlbBrrrrrr...rrrBlrrrr.

My stomach growls and gurgles audibly at the stimulation. Your other hand pokes and prods all around my belly, squeezing and pinching like how one would check tire-pressure on a bike tire. The rough treatment only serves to upset whatever is going on in my belly and seems to be hastening whatever reaction is taking place within.

“Oooh...nnngh...b-babe...n-not helping.” I murmur, trying to push your hands off of my distended tummy. “I don't...ooh...d-don't feel good.” I moan passed a cross between an aborted hiccup and what would have been a belch had the hiccup not sucked whatever it was back down. Whatever it was burbles around in my drum-tight belly. “Ooohh...o-oww...p-please stop. N-No more...m-my tummy...oooh...m-my tum...ugh.” I plead.

“Shh. It'll help. It's gotta calm down eventually.” You whisper, hands sliding over my belly and hiking my shirt up over the bloated dome that has replaced my normally flat abdomen.

I can't help the moans as you continue to prod and squeeze my belly. It's a really odd feeling. My stomach feels tight and stretched, but without the heaviness that would go hand-in-hand with eating too much. I haven't swallowed anything in over four hours, and the last thing down my throat was a fancy frappucchino that was about 40% whipped cream.

Ding!

The dryer signifies the end of its cycle and I quickly get to my feet, brushing passed you as I use the task as an excuse to evade your prodding hands. I regret the movement almost instantly as my belly protests the movement. I slide a palm over my belly, eyes widening. It feels...rounder...than it did before. I swear, my camisole feels a bit tighter than it was before you got your hands on it. Is it just my imagination?

Bending over to pull items out of the dryer is agony. My stomach feels ridiculously inflated. Something thick and foamy has taken root in my belly and it's been puffing up, expanding to fill every crevasse in my guts. The image of the foam that comes out of a fire extinguisher comes to mind—reacting with the air to expand and smother the flames. I feel like that's what's going on in my belly—like someone shoved the business-end of a fire extinguisher down my throat and let it rip straight into my tummy.

Discreetly, I try to clench my abdominals—willing myself to belch in hopes that it will relieve some of the pressure in my belly. Try as I might, nothing comes up. Everything from the base of my esophagus to some mid-way of my large intestine feels like it's completely bloated up with foam. There are pinching sensations in my lower belly—twinges that tell me that my intestines are just as bloated up as the rest of me. It would seem that the thick, foamy whipped topping from the earlier frappuccino has taken liberties and invaded every inch of my digestive tract. It's light, but thick enough to prevent any wayward gas pockets from moving about freely.

I groan as I pull myself back into a standing position, lifting the basket full of warm, dry laundry with it.

“Urk!” I swallow back against something thick trying to breach into my esophagus as strong arms snake around my waist and clamp down, constricting my bloated belly as my back is pressed up against your front. I drop the laundry basket, contents spilling onto the hardwood floor.

“Nnngh...b-babe...please~m-my tummy...oooh...t-too much pressure. T-Too tight--” I frantically tap at your arms, squirming in your hold. “Nnngh...n-not here! B-Babe—t-the laundry!” I squeal, trying to squirm and face away from the freshly laundered mess on the floor, lest whatever's bloating up my belly come back up to soil the lot. “Nnngh—y-you're doing the next load!” I hiss at you as your arms tighten around my belly.

My guts grumble angrily—quaking within me. Like a cartoon geyser about to blow. There's just so, so, so much pressure in my tum...and you're squeezing me so, so, so tight that there's no way you don't feel the quaking of my guts.

[carrickbender]

Friday 5:

1. I thought it was going to be slick as hell this morning, but thankfully it wasn't. Still had to call in to work... #thanksgastricsystem

2. That being said, I really think I'd enjoy remote work more. I like my coworkers, but I'm trying to put up time boundaries and so far it's not really working. We work when there is product, so having 2 administrators there on a day like today is pointless, but I'd still have a difficult time getting a dictation of a SAP script done so that we don't have to rely on our support team so much. And I realize that I'm only in week 4, but the heat is there because another huge facility in our company goes live in a few days with a ton more product offerings, and not enough support to go around. So yeah...#sinkorswim

3. I will probably have the weekend off too, which is nice, and we have zero plans. Probably put away Christmas, clean a little, try to find a thank you gift for my stepson for fixing our sink(He, his wife, and their kids are such a delight!)... low key. Hell, I might even read a bit. READ, OMFG!!!!! H got me a book about "chasing the burst", the stories about the wood and the people who built the legendary guitars of Gibson and other great builders, and Im dying to just soak it all in. Funny thing is some of that wood can be traced to a mill that used to exist about 5 blocks from my house, and MANY moons ago Gibson took loads of blocks out of the maple grove right across from the farm we used to rent. (Fun fact: I have an aging burl from that grove that someday will become a guitar...someday...lol). Anyhoo... #nerdout

4. Speaking of which, I just finished the Audible version of Bono's book, "Surrender", and it was moving. It always amazes me the circles in which runs, like knowing people; but then it also amazes me that I've met people with whom he's friends. And to that end, I'm sure that I have very few degrees of separation with quite a few of yall, we just don't know it... lol! #itsasmallworld

5. I think that eventhough I've started this new job, and I'm really enjoying the challenge, I'm going to start looking at jobs with guitar manufacturers that match my education and skill set. Totally dreaming, I know, but here's the thing: I need to have an outlt for my passion for music. If it's not making the music, it has to be part of the supply chain that builds the instruments that make the music. It can be done ethically, with sourcing that's environmentally considerate, and at price points so that people getting into music can take those instruments and keep the tradition going. It's not me saying I'm quitting my craft, it's me making saying I want to commit to making the craft accessible and sustainable. #itstooearlyforthebullshitgeoff, #shhhhhh

Anyhoo, back to making music with my fingers and taking buggy to school. Much love to yall, and have a good friyay!

[alexissara]

Alexis Sara's Top 10 Most Anticipated Games Of 2024

We're about to enter 2024 and with that we have all the lists, lists I am not immune to making because I slowly build them up all year. Last year I played a fuck load of games and so this year I wanted to talk about 10 games I think look really fucking cool that are coming out in the next year or two. Some of these games are likely to release in 2025 instead but it'll be fun to see if they remain on the list next year then. I mostly just wanted to spotlight some art that looks cool to me outside of the context of a Sapphic Games Guide or a Review and maybe get others on the hype train with me. This list is not in order and just 10 games I think look like they could have an impact on me, I may not even buy every game on this list but there the 10 that look like I am most likely to check out.

Gales Of Nayeli

So this is one of two games on the list I've already purchased. I backed the kickstarter of the game a while back and I thought "it looks alright and when I asked if there was gonna be any sapphic content the creator told me in depth what content he had already made so sure I'll back it. What was more if a thank you for being so kind and responsive so fast has turned into my most hype game of the year. Blindcoco and me have become friends over time so I am biased but I was actually sold on the game before me and him became buddy buddy when I played the demo and saw the amazing work that went into it. Then the extremally positive response from him and the community towards my desire to focus in on women and sapphic women only added to my excitement for the game.

The game genuinely seems to be raising the bar for SRPGs and really feels like it is a step above Fire Emblem and not an emulation of Fire Emblem. I loved the demo and the concepts in the game so much it inspired me to start working on my own SRPG studios game knowing what is possible at the high end of investment in the system can really be something special and really cool. I love that there is a focus on trying to cast voice actors who match ethnicity to the diverse cast, I love that there is a wide range of diversity in the revealed cast, I love the amount of queer women I am aware of in the game, I love the animations and sprite work, I love the gameplay, I am really really excited about this game and I think this game has a high shot at being one of my favorite games.

Fields Of Mistria 

I make fun of farming sims a little on my lists and stuff but only because I actually love farming sims especially in concept. This game probably has my favorite art style of the whole lot of games today. It's lovely 90s anime style sprite work is just AHHHHHHHHHH so good. I do in fact want to kiss the women in this game very badly and I would enjoy playing the game for the sake of dating them alone.

Rune Factory: Dragon

Let's bang out the second farming sim while we're at it. We don't know a bunch about this game but it really just has to do two things for me to be into it. One, let you be gay like the newest RF and Story of Season games already let you do and Two, keep up the art direction and bam, I'm in. My biggest problem with the last Rune Factory game was that the art style made every woman look like a 12 year old and not in the like chibi story of seasons way like they just looked like they were kids. This however, has a much better set of art direction and it makes me think there might actually be women I'd want to gay marry.

Mahou Senshi Cosplay Club

I really love Behold's previous game Chroma Squad but when I got this demo I had no idea they were the Chroma Squad people. The mix of dress up and RPG gameplay is a dream come true kind of game and the outfit customization is leagues beyond a game like Fashion Dreamer despite likely being made on a much smaller budget. The PSX style graphics actually work here with them evoking nostalgic graphics while also not actually being restrained by a Playstation One's issues. I just really loved the process of making the outfit and character in this game and honestly that alone is a potential game seller. The gameplay element was solid and I really want to play more of this.

Beastieball 

BeastieBall seems to be a really fun take on the Monster Taming genre. Having the monster friends play a sport and naturally be inclined to play the sport makes for a very cute and wholesome premise to which you become more a coach than an owner to these little cuties. It's a pretty simple concept in the demo but it's promising and cute and I do like that the monsters you collect build relationships with each other, I think that is something really special and neat and something I'd like to see more monster tamers do.

Love In A Bottle

 There is a lot of nice looking visual novels coming out but Love In A Bottle is dating sim that is really capturing my eye. You play as a demon girl, bam okay I am sold. You date other monster girls okay I'm sold. And it's got more then the basic one outfit you expect from a standard visual novel dating sim type deal for characters that is yet another sold factor. It seems really cute, seems fun and I hope I can smooch all the women at once.

Fantasy Life I

While I said we were done with farming sims, I didn't say we were done with sims as we have Level-5's Life Sim, Fantasy Life. I won't be buying the game if I can't be gay in it but I really loved the first Fantasy Life on the 3DS and I think if it can keep up the charm and fun of the original game and add a homosexual seasoning on top it'll be a perfect cute and fun time. I love the wide array of jobs and how these all build into each other, it's a very one of a kind experience and really fun.

Princess Peach Showtime 

This is the true triple A game of the list and the only one that has captivated me in all the shows of all the consoles and developers I've seen of late. Peach is barbie now and I am here for it, let her have a million jobs and have a game based around her doing these different roles and being an icon in each of them, sounds good, I'm in, it's a really cute and fun concept. It looks really fun and the art style looks great.

Our Life Now and Forever 

There is no other games like the Our Life games and getting to be sapphic in this one means I finally get to go ahead and experience the series I have been curious about for a while now. This game will let you be polyamarous which is the only game on this list I can say for sure will allow you to do that and that alone is something that would keep me engaged. However, getting to grow up with characters, change your pronouns, your name, anything about yourself as you do and having the characters change with you is amazing. I love the concept of this game and the wild reactivity the games demo has always provided just to a simple thing like me choosing to be trans in the childhood phase is amazing, it is truly such a considered and thoughtful game with such masterful crafting that the act one demo alone is probably worth money. So I did back this one on kickstarter as well so this is my other pick up.

Unlike other games on this list I am fairly confident this is a 2025 game and not a 2024 game but I want to talk about it now because people on the Patreon will be getting to play updated versions of the game over the course of the year akin to early access. I think the game is for sure worth a look.

Izrand Allure

After playing the previous game in the series I am totally sold on wanting to experience Izrand Allure. Luxaren Allure was a really special experience I had this year finally checking out the game after I think years of putting it off and beating it I really want to play this follow up. This game seems far more in depth and far more artistically masterful then Luxaren as well so I really want to see everything this game has to offer. I love a good job system and this game boasts one. I really want to see this lesbian RPG and I hope I get a chance to play it very soon but obviously Unity the dev should take her time to make it. Regardless, I am just gushing every time I see the game and I think this has potential to be a massive game of the year type hit for me.

If you enjoyed this post, I got a lot more end of the year lists coming up when it's actually next year so I can tell people what I enjoyed in December. You can also support me in making cool queer art by checking out my Patreon and Ko-fi.

[yourtouchismidas]

I’m seriously missing all the ruins chat!!! Idk if you were still writing little bit for it but if so then I had a thought. Imagine matty having to deal with Gigi when she gets her period, maybe for the first time or just in general. I feel like he’d panic but he’d try so hard to help her out🫠

awww me too ruins was such an era!!

i think when she gets her first period, maybe ruins girl is away, and gigi locks herself in the bathroom. matty knocks on the door like, "baby what's wrong?" and she wont tell him but he wont let it go, he keeps knocking, and then eventually she yells to him, "i got my period okay dad, leave me alone."

matty is silent for a second. as he takes this in. it's his baby and she is growing up. he is so happy and yet so sad at the same time.

"i think mum has tampons in the cupboard" he yells through the door, unsure what else to say.

"i'm thirteen years old, matthew," gigi says, "i'm not putting anything... inside me."

matty laughs. puts his hands over his mouth to muffle it so he doesnt upset her.

"that's fair enough, baba," he says, "what do you need?"

"pads. please. not fucking huge scary ones."

"language!" matty says.

"oh fuck off, matty, i'm bleeding!!! i should be allowed to swear."

he muffles a laugh again. "fair enough." he says again.

"get me nice ones please. i'm fragile," gigi says.

"nice.... pads?" matty asks, confused. he should have read more about teenage girls. paid attention more in sex ed instead of sling-shotting condoms at hann's face.

"you know," gigi says, her voice breaking a bit, "the ones that smell like flowers or something."

she starts crying half way through the sentence and matty knocks gently.

"baby, what you crying for?" he says softly.

"i dont know!" she sobs, but she is also laughing. he laughs too. until they are both in peels of laughter. gigi still sobbing too.

"are you in pain?"

"no," gigi says, "but i'm worried i might be later. i've heard cramps can be awful."

"well we will take it easy today, okay? watch movies?"

"can you just hurry up and get my pads please. i'm stuck on the fucking loo."

matty laughs again. "course baby sit tight."

he runs to tesco. he gets a basket and puts in ibuprofen and paracetamol and then some actual period pain relief with a picture of a women with what looks like a burning uterus on the front. he buys a microwave hot water bottle that smells like lavender. dropping one his basket for gigi then going back and getting another one. you know. for his own comfort. for his own self care day. he gets a bunch of chocolate and sweets and crisps. then he goes to the pads. he stares at them. there is loads. she asked for nice ones. ones that smell like flowers? what the fuck? he thinks. do those even exist. he rings you but you don't pick up. busy at work. he thinks about ringing again but he doesnt want to bother you. he wants to do this on his own too. he's a dad. it's his responsibility. he tries to google it but the ones that come up aren't on the shelves.

"are you alright?" a woman says next to him. she's around his age. it looks like. she's wearing a big coat even though its warm out.

"my daughter wants pads that smell like flowers," he tells her helplessly.

the woman laughs. she reaches up to the shelf and grabs some.

"how old is she?" she asks.

"thirteen," he says.

the woman reaches up and grabs a few more boxes.

"get her these too. and these," she says, "for options."

"thank you!" he says. he wants to reach out and hug her.

he takes them all back to gigi, who emerges from the toilet five minutes later with a frown on her face so deep it makes matty laugh again.

"dad!" she whines.

"sorry," he says, "i love how much you are growing up. i love who you are now. and who you were and who you will be."

she rolls her eyes. "shut up," she says. but she hugs him and asks to watch movies.

"of course baby, whatever you want."

[pinkboxess]

ruminations on fanfiction

I have been all happy today because of all the requests I got, so I'm thinking about all the reasons I love fanfic, and all the happiness it brings to my life, yada yada yada.

So, I majored in English, and for the first half or so of my undergrad, I planned to go into the publishing field. (This will be relevant, I promise.) I wrote things that I submitted places and tried to get published. Some of them were accepted and some of them were rejected. I took editing classes and volunteered as an editor for my school's literary journal.

And I didn't like it.

I realized after a little bit that the more "advanced" I got into that field and that world, the more I disliked it. It wasn't what I was best at, either. I never really got the hang of making good editing decisions (as in, deciding whether to accept or reject a submission). Trying to cater my own writing towards what publishers wanted was also less than enjoyable.

I love, love writing, so it's not that I regretted my major or lost the passion or anything. But I like writing the most when it's not going to be evaluated. Either when that's my own writing being evaluated by a publisher, or me as the editor evaluating someone else's work. Those are important jobs that I don't want to dismiss as inherently immoral or something like that-- if you're an editor, that's awesome. But it just wasn't for me. I always liked people's pieces too much or not enough, depending on whether it spoke to me, personally. It was too hard to be objective. I didn't really like trying to be objective.

So I don't write stuff to send to publishers anymore. For one thing, I'm in grad school now in a different field, and for another, I just really don't enjoy myself as much when I'm writing a piece that makes my brain go into that mode of "this has to be good" in a literary sense of the word good. At some point in my life I might like to go back to that kind of writing. But for right now, it's just not enjoyable, and since writing is a hobby for me, I don't make myself try to sit down and write something that I'm not excited about.

But I write loads and loads of fanfiction because fanfiction is so freeing. It's the epitome of self-indulgence. It's like this giant playground where I can write about vulnerable concepts like sexual desire and body image and aging and relationships. I mean, personally, I don't see myself writing sex scenes in anything except fanfiction, especially ones so detailed and intended for enjoyment.

But it's really like you're writing in this separate little safe bubble where you can do anything you want. The only feedback you receive is positive (I mean, just personally, I've never received a hate comment, so I can say that.) You can write works that are as short or as long as you want. You can post every day or once a month. You can always write the exact same trope, or you can do something totally new every time. And whatever you write, there will probably be an audience for it.

It's writing just purely for the sake of enjoyment. You're not trying to be good. You're not trying to pen a masterpiece. You're not submitting it for approval-- instead, you're posting it to be enjoyed freely, with zero barrier to entry. And that's what prevents me from losing motivation. I don't get tired of it, because it's always fun, and if anything about it isn't fun, I just don't do that.

I am so glad I've found some people in one of the corners of the internet who read my fics <3 it's such a fun hobby and distraction and escape and therapy substitute. Thank you for feeding my hyperfixation/special interest/obsession.

[danses-with-dogmeat]

Big big fan of your work!!

🦀 👑 for Gob with mutual pining f!lone please!

"Hold still. This might sting a little."

Ahh thank you! And omg, yesssssss.

I love Gob, we love Gob, everybody loves Gob, let's do this thing.

I hope you like it!

"Enough. Moriarty." His name left you as a snarl. "Let go of him."

Your eyes stayed glued to the Irishman's as his brows stayed furrowed, as he sneered.

"What'd I tell ya about brining guns into me bar, lad/lass?"

You made a show taking the safety off as you pointed your pistol to Colin's head.

"I wasn't asking."

A dull thud sounded as Moriarty's balled fist released him, and Gob slid down to the hardwood floor.

"Are you alright?" You dared to let your eyes leave Moriarty as you glanced down to Gob's crumpled form, as he made slow moves up into a seated position.

His hands were shaking as he grabbed onto the side of the bar to hold himself steady, but he nodded.

"Come on, then." You held out an arm, and Gob hesitated, looking tentatively up at his boss's furious expression.

"Gob."

Your voice snapped his attention back to you.

"Let's go."

"Fine. Go on, then. You can go ahead and take him, but I expect ya ne're to set foot back in this bar again. And you," blue-grey eyes narrowed as he threw his fury Gob's way. "I expect to see ya back here in the mornin'. Still got a debt to me, you know."

The ghoul swallowed, but your arm quickly took his, and with your pistol still trained on the Irishman, you exited the bar with Gob at your side.

--

"Sorry you had to see that." Gob's voice was quiet from the sofa of your Megaton house.

"I'm sorry too." You voiced as you grabbed the supplies you needed from the kitchen area. "One of these days, I'm really gonna make that asshole pay for the way he's treated you all this time."

You stepped back into the living room and sat down beside him, setting a tub of the cleanest water you could find, some rubbing alcohol, and a rag between you.

"No. N-no, I'm not gonna make you deal with that. Moriarty, he's... he'll get back at you. No matter what you do, he'll do worse."

"Not if he's dead." You spoke almost without thinking, fury still pulsing through your veins at the way you'd seen him. Standing over Gob, bloodied knuckles raised high as he laid into the ghoul again and again and again.

Gob's face had gotten the worst of it, and now his left eye was so swollen over, you could hardly see it. If he'd still had a nose, it surely would've been broken in at least three places.

"Lone, you don't mean that..." He rasped out, his good eye wide with surprise at your bluntness.

You sighed, wetting the washcloth in the small basin before holding it up to his cracked, bloodied cheek. He winced as you dragged it over his wound, holding his breath as you washed the crusting blood away.

"Sorry." You said at his reaction, "It's just... He deserves it. I don't know if I could really be the one to pull the trigger, but after everything he's done, someone oughta do it."

You wrung out the cloth and loaded it with water again, taking more care this time as you brushed it lightly over his eye.

"After today though... I tell you, I was close, Gob."

He flinched nearly the whole time, at every brush you made over him, but in the end, you could see the details of his face again, even below the quickly-forming bruises.

"Lone...?" He asked quietly, not daring to look you in the eye as you washed the cloth in the water below.

"Hm?" You grabbed the bottle of rubbing alcohol and dipped the cloth into it.

"Why do you care so much?"

Your hands paused, the cloth becoming almost too saturated, enough so that it began to drip down onto the couch. Until you blinked and set the bottle down on the coffee table beside you.

"I... Gob, why wouldn't I care? What he was doing... Anyone would have come to help."

The ghoul shook his head firmly, his good eye wide with disbelief.

"No one ever has. All the years I've been with him... No one's ever tried to stop it."

He swallowed hard, looking away.

"I'm not worth it."

Your chest ached at the words, at the definitive way he spoke them.

"Well... You're worth it to me."

You heard Gob's breath catch in his throat, and when he turned back to face you, his good eye glistened with emotion.

You smiled at him sadly

"Now, hold still, okay? This one might sting a little." You brushed your fingers over one cheek, to keep him in place as the other raised the cloth to his wounds, to where Moriarty's blows had separated his already marred skin.

"Lone?" He spoke quietly as you worked, being as gentle as possible with the cloth as your fingers so lightly caressed his other cheek.

"Yes, Gob?"

"Thank you."

[theladyofbloodshed]

Hi. I really admire your writng and love all your fic very much. Really,as a reader i cant wrap my head around how incredible your writing are. But as a fellow writer, it got me thinking how you balance your day working-personal life-reading-writing. I just enter corporate life and it was exhausting. How do you manage your time to write and is it hard for you to keep your interest in writing while working?

Thank youu and no, i think your chrismast deco look very beautiful. If I visit your house i would love staying around the tree with a dim light and a warm tea.

Thank you so much for the message. That's incredibly kind of you. You are welcome for a cup of tea any time!

I will break down my day under the read more.

05:40 - partner wakes up for work (waking me up) 06:10 - partner leaves for work and I get up 07:00 - in the car to work 07:30 - at work. I don't get paid until 08:30 but I literally would not be ready for the kids if I came in at that time, plus I'm already awake (and definitely a morning person). I'm usually alone in the class until around that time so I tend to have an audiobook on while I'm getting the class ready. I teach in a different classroom every single day, so I have to be organised. 16:00 - finish work 16:30 - home for a cup of tea and usually go on social media/write 18:00 - cook dinner which usually takes about an hour After that, I either spend time with my partner, read, or write. The only day I haven't written something was when I had to be at work until nearly 9pm for a halloween party, but generally, I write every single day. I will be honest in that I don't really have a social life. I've only really got one friend and she lives 60 miles away. I cancelled my gym membership because I hate going after work in winter and I've been so ill for the last couple of months that it was a waste of money. At the weekends, my partner and I might go to a coffee shop or a walk, but most of the time I am writing. It's nothing I have to force. I look forward to writing every single day. If I found it a chore, I wouldn't do it. Sometimes, I am super tired from work too and have a low output, but in those times I'll lay on the bed or take a bath with some music on and still be imagining scenarios. If you are exhausted, don't push it. If I've imagined a scene enough then I know exactly how it will play out to make the writing easier. My brain almost thinks in a writer mode now, like instead of seeing the scene, I'll also be narrating it.

I am constantly thinking about my writing. When I drive, I am imagining scenarios/dialogue. If I go for a walk alone, my headphones are on to dissociate and imagine. For me, it's all consuming. Weirdly, none of my new colleagues know I have any books and I've just mentioned it in passing to my family because we're not close and they don't really care. Even my partner has no clue about character names or anything because he hasn't read them. It's got to the point where I have RSI in my hand from typing so much. Today, I've written about 5000 words and have written 100k words for a single book since October.

It is hard for me to switch off sometimes. I do wonder if I have some sort of ADHD because I have to be doing something at all times. When I'm at work for my planning time, I'm usually doing all 8 jobs on my to do list at the same time, like this page is loading so I'll start this email then go back to that lesson plan then reply to that other person. I cannot just sit and watch tv, I either have to be sewing, or writing by hand, or typing. The only time I do nothing is when I sleep lmao. I've always been that way though.

In terms of reading, I've really struggled this year. Most books have been 2/3 star reads for me - which is really unlike me. I'm usually super generous with 5 stars. I've had to force myself to sit and read a lot because I'll just scroll on my phone otherwise when I'm bored.

I wish I had kids, but I don't, and thankfully my partner also cooks and cleans so if its his turn to cook, I can carry on writing. Sometimes it has caused arguments so I try to make a conscious effort to put my laptop down and spend quality time together. Writing is just everything to me. I love it. It's all I ever want to do. But, I'm also not a night person, so my laptop is usually off before 9pm and I'm asleep by half past 9 nearly every night ha.

[amalgamgooze]

old home movie camera

Today I went thrifting with a friend.

They got a whole bunch of clothes and stuff (cost ~$70, apparently valued at >$200), while I bought just one thing--a bag with an old video camera (cost $7).

I know. A steal, right? At seven bucks, I couldn't just pass this up. If it didn't work, so be it. But if it does...

This bag came with a camera, two batteries, a charger dock for the batteries, and a bunch of old cassettes apparently with film on them.

Now, as anyone would be, they'd be a little cautious with the tapes they got from someone else. They could be anything--even something that might not exactly be "Rated for All Audiences".

...

After charging the battery for a bit, I boot up the camera and look through the lens.

It's really interesting--there's no screen that pops out on the side or anything. The feed is all through this weird lens--both recording and playback.

I look around my room a bit, loving every moment of that before-my-time washed tint shading the view of my familiar room.

Then, I load one of the cassettes in and start playback.

I was prepared for anything...

...and I got nothing but a video of a child scooting around on one of those toys that toddlers sit on and scoot. (ChatGPT isn't helping me too much with putting a real name to this toy--it's just calling it a 'scoot toy'.)

Fascinating.

I would've kept watching, but as old technology tends to do, it died quickly thanks to the not-fully-charged battery.

But as the battery died, I saw that "no battery" indicator that I'd seen on media that tries to be nostalgic.

It was honestly kind of bizarre.

I'm holding this real contraption from the past in my hands.

I'm getting a glimpse into someone else's life, whether they meant to offer the tapes up or not.

Obviously, I'm not going to be creepy about it.

It's just fascinating that the child scooting around on the toy is probably all grown up now, and might even have kids of their own.

Like, that person lived a whole childhood since they starred in the video I'd just watched.

They've experienced the same global events I've experienced--and more.

Hell, they were probably alive when the towers fell!

And all I've got of them right now is a momentary glimpse into their childhood...

But there's also a person behind the camera!

Possibly the same one I hold now!

The first child often gets the most video taken of them--

was this a new proud parent who's recording their kid to immortalize these little moments of childlike innocence? Had they just bought this camera and their kid was the first subject they could think of recording?

Is someone missing these tapes? Had they accidently discarded them alongside this outdated camera, or was it all intentional?

So much mystery.

So much allure.

...

And then comes the ability to view MY OWN baby videos too.

We've had a box of unviewable cassettes from the bygone era of my innocence. I've been dying to watch them, but we haven't really had anything that could play cassettes...

until now.

...

In the twilight of my own "childhood/teen years", it's almost poetic to find this old technology that once represented the dawn of a new era--a revolution in memory capturing technology.

And now it's all but faded into obscurity.

Only weird freaks like myself find any meaning in outdated "Video 8 Handycam" tech.

...

It's all just so fascinating, no?

Tell me that you wouldn't be drawn in by the allure of a glimpse into someone else's valued memories?

Someone else's life?

Someone else's story?

...

On some level it's just self-referential.

You all are tuning in to some infinitesimal fragment of my life story...

...which now involves tuning into an infinitesimal fragment of someone else's life story.

[ussjellyfish]

We got 6in/15cm then 14in/35 cm of snow right after each other, which is a lot, and it took some digging out, so there hasn't been school since Tuesday. We had online school, but that's exhausting and pointless. Felix can't go to daycare if I can't drive there, so he's been home, which he doesn't really mind. I think he misses his friends and activities, but...he's a sweetie. He likes google meets.

It's been a lot. I've had a headache since Wednesday too, which is annyoing. I'm pretty sure it's a migraine, it was worse for two days, it's different today, so it might be more of a ending kind of thing? it's a lot. I will ask my GP when I go in, but my appoitnment was supposed to be Thrusday and...that didn't happen. Thanks snow. I'll try again. I'm not sure how much they can even do for migraines. Other peoople I know who have them just...have them, and meds. MAybe the meds are good.

On a normal workday I really just have to make dinner, but we're home so it's breakfast lunch and dinner and entertain Felix and my dad is a lot and it's just...constant.

Like I got to be alone long enough to shovel out the car, drive the car to the big parking structure downtown, take transit back to the house. I'll have to go get it after breakfast tomorrow. Then grovery shopping and standard weekend and...

I can't even take a nap when he's home because he doesn't nap and he has to be entertained and he will snuggle up and watch part of a movie but he wants me to be awake. He has opinions and he likes to act it out and run around, which is adorable, but it's really hard when my head hurts.

I aalso don't parent well when this happens. I don't read to him enough or come up with enough ideas, and I have to start things before he'll do it. He's too little to decide "oh I want to color" so I have to start coloring and color with him, and he's too little to want to paint, so if I want him to paint, I have to start it. There are too many toys and some I should get rid of because he really doesn't play with them. He likes scaarbes and running around. Again, this is great, he's great. I'm not doing the best job.

It's the out of spoons wall again. On the upside, it's not a "oh I'm out of spoons for fic, because I did get some of that done, but it's a definite out of spoons for my life. (great).

But it'll be all right. We caan go places and I'll figure out something it's just so much starting and responsibility. Like... dad doesn't do chores unless I start them. He'll load and unload the dishwasher, but I have to feed him and Felix and decide what we're going to do, and balance if Felix is annoying him and try to come up with food both of them will eat.

and I don't want to. Feeding Felix is fine, and I love him, and he's honestly a pretty easy kid. I fail him so much more than he does anything. He's going through a "oh I'm not hungry" phase which leads to losing it, because not eating is bad for tiny humans but he doesn't get why.

and it's one thing if he's having a tantrum and I have to deal with it, and I usually do okay. It's weird when we're being watched, or dad wants to be involved, because it's not...it's not helpful. I'm not sure what would be helpful, but having this other parasitic adult around isn't it.

I expect the constant caring for Felix, he's 4. It's hard when it's another adult. There's no reciprocation. It's just... "your coffee is on the counter" "you haven't showered" "I thought you were going too..."

I'll get it. I'll do it. stop needing things from me. (even input, because I have to constantly do...things and say things and comment on things and I already am at my maximum of giving.

I think it would be less if some things were different. Snow days witout work or no migraine or like...dad went somewhere. He doesn't leave the apartment unless it's a medical appointment, and he really doesn't have enough of those. I don't think he realizes how nice it would be just to sit in silence.

I can kind of get it at 3am, but I pay for it the next day.

[meenatranslates]

[SSR] Red that Burns from Admiration (2/3)

*title name may change

"Both the courage to change and the determination to stay the same are cool! But what I want to scream with all my might right now is..."

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3

Translation under the cut

sing alone - Part 2

*Director's default name as Izumi

――(Taichi and Omi's Room)――

Taichi: Heave-ho! Phew―.

Omi: That's quite a load. Where are you going with your guitar case?

Taichi: It's my first challenge at 19 years old! Please pray for my safety!

Omi: ...I see. Do your best.

Taichi: Thanks, I'll be going now!

―――

Taichi: O-kay...

(The spot where I got permission to use... it's this corner here, right?)

(Anyway, I'll try to set up the amplifier... I think this is fine.)

Passerby A: ？

Passerby B: Is it a rendition?

Passerby A: Sounds like it.

Taichi: ――.

(I'm already used to street acting, but this is different than usual, so I'm really nervous...!)

(Somehow, this kind of feeling is nostalgic.)

(When I did street act for the first time during my times at GOD-za, I couldn't help but be afraid of the passersby's stares.)

(At the time when I didn't have confidence in myself as an actor, suddenly starting a play on a street corner was too high a hurdle for me...)

(On the inside, I was scared to death.)

(But as I did it more and more, I gradually got used to it... I thought that no one was watching me anyway, so I stopped worrying about their stares.)

(Now I'm different than me in those days. It's because I've become more confident in myself that I'm a little scared of doing my first challenge alone.)

Taichi: .....

(But this kind of tension isn't bad, is it?)

(There aren't that many chances to jump into the thrilling moment for the first time like this.)

(I want to test myself here and now.)

(And I want someone to listen to this song that I love. I want it to reach them―)

Taichi: ――.

―――

Izumi: Thank you for your hard work~. Excuse me, I have to go now.

Theater member A: Good job~. Countin' on ya again next time~.

Izumi: (I don't think I have to do shopping today. Let's just go straight to the dorm.)

(The number of people walking is gradually increasing, huh? I never walked through Veludo Way at this time, so it's kinda fresh.)

(Huh? There's a crowd over there... Is it a street act?)

Passerby A: Encore! Encore!

Taichi: Well, I only have one song, but... if that's all right with you!

Izumi: ――.

Taichi: ♪ "The silence of the darkness and the blurred moon, leaving behind the struggled me" ♪ (1)

Izumi: (This voice is―)

―――

Taichi: ♪ "Who am I really, and where do I want to go?" ♪

Izumi: (I knew it, it's Taichi-kun!)

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3

Note:

He's singing Autumn 9th Play theme song "Dawn of the Red".

[fallingsunflower]

Hello love I’m so sorry this has happened to you. 

I never had a problem when commuting into the city. I did the commute for seven years between college and working from LI to NYC. But when I took Amtrak out of state was when I had a problem. There was this young guy who sat a row across from me and I could tell he was eyeing me up and I was traveling alone. I was giving signals and vibes like don’t bother me. 

But in the dining car the conductor was like oh why don’t you sit with her and I hear him whisper get her number to the creepy guy. (That conductor did not get a tip and I wanted to kill him) and the guy was trying to play footsie‘s with me and I really wished I told him to F off. Then late at night he did brother me but another conductor was walking by and I made a big scene and everyone jumped up to help and conductor removed him. And I always wished I said more and told him straight up, like leave me alone or otherwise I’ll put you through the wall. And I felt guilty and powerless, but it did teach me lesson to stand up for myself in the future. And I wasn’t going to let this random loser ruin my trip.

But for you don’t let someone take your joy and sense of safety away and never feel bad about causing noise. Like us New Yorker might not come off as nice but we’re very kind. And if I was on that train and saw that you best believe he would have been tasting my pepper spray and feel the ⚡️⚡️⚡️ to his privates from my teaser. I don’t like seeing anyone get abused. Like let’s see if any weapon they may of had, could stand a chance against my Kate Spade bag loaded with my 10 lb thinkpad computer from work. I dropped that thing on my foot one time and thought it was broken, imagine it flying at someone’s head. 💀

I know it’s not the worst thing to have happened but it was still very alarming.

Also this try and remove this thought and/or reframe it, because yes others could have had it worse but what happened to you is unacceptable and it hurt you and it means something to you.

It’s not your fault, you can’t control others actions and you did the best you could do in the situation. Like I don’t know if you went through a situation like this before, but be proud of yourself. 

Like in the heat of the moment it’s hard to think especially if you don’t have a point of reference, but you got yourself to safety. I’m very proud of you for removing yourself and finding safety. 

But for sure grab a conductor, they may have not noticed, because they’re running maybe to flip the switches and check the tickets etc. 

But please have a beautiful day, and I hope you feel better soon. Also if you have a friend or relative or someone to talk to make sure to reach out and get a hug too. And treat yourself to something nice, I purchased myself some ice cream after that werido bothered me. 

(∩｀-´)⊃━☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟI’m sending you hugs and love through the internet. And good vibes and healing energy.

👛

Thank you love ❤️ easier said than done to reframe thoughts but I'll try. It was my first time going through something like that. I've had issues in the past before but not to that extent with a stranger.

I'm sorry you went through that. The first conductor shouldn't have even done that hello?? Annoying and I'm glad you got out of there safely.

Also I have a lot of LI followers lol I feel seen.

Next time I'll definitely try to do more, if there's a next time (I hope there isn't). I was just so shaken up and couldn't think properly.

And yes I bought myself a sweatshirt lol I went to the Yankees game. Today I'm taking it easy, mainly because I'm sick though.

♡

(also I think this is your signature but correct me if I'm wrong lol)

[bg-sparrow]

3, 6, and 7 for AO3 Wrapped

Eeeeee, another AO3 Wrapped ask! I'm having loads of fun with this, so please keep the numbers coming! I'd love to answer them all! Thanks for the ask, Jay!

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

I have to go with There Are No Roads. It was only meant to be this short interlude of a piece tying Parts 2 and 3 together in my series, detailing the 8 months Doc is in 1885 without Marty. And it turned into this beautiful novella with good original characters and fleshed-out canon characters and filling in the gaps that are mentioned in Part 3 — Fourth of July, what happened to the old school teacher to bring in Clara, Doc attending town meetings, Seamus being threatened about the Palace by Tannen, Tannen getting his horse shoed by Doc.

The best part was how original it was yet it was able to be slipped into canon believably. I'm incredibly proud of that. I know lots of people who read the Time Circuits Series skip it to get to Part 3, but it's absolutely a story I'm thankful that I got to tell. It was waiting in me and I never expected it. I hope for those who do decide to read the series, you don't skip Part 2.5!

6. Favorite Title You Used?

Oh, I love titles. I love thinking them up and waiting for the lightbulb to shatter over my head when I get so excited that it bursts from an idea clicking. I think that moment happened the most with my McFly July drabble collection, The Boy Who Leapt Through Time. The title is a play on the famous work The Girl Who Leapt Through Time, and switching it up to "Boy" made it obvious it was about Marty but it was also a reference to a famous work involving time travel (I love basing my titles off works of fiction/ movies/ TV that involve time travel in some way).

I did chapter titles in The Time Circuits Series in the same way, and my favorite chapter title this year was Another Time, Perhaps - Chapter 9 of There Are No Roads where I wrote what happened if Doc had been shot at the festival by Buford.

7. If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

I think in my fics recently, I've only put lyrics from Bryan Adams's "Heaven" in my series epilogue.

In general, I'm listening more to instrumental music or the mood of a song than the lyrics because they are rarely a perfect fit for what I need. I pull most of my inspiration from film composers. The story I just finished today, Once Upon a Time in the West, had a mini playlist with softer songs from 1883 on it for Ann's theme and foreboding tracks from The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford.

Though Marty's song to me is "You Might Think" by The Cars. I just love that song for him. Vibes hard.

Thanks again for the ask! Muscle your friends into sending more numbers!! :D

[jodilin65]

Yesterday was a good day. I just wish I hadn't taken hydroxyzine to help me fall asleep because it caused me to sleep 10 hours so now I'm groggy because that's way too long. Hopefully, the cobwebs will clear from my brain soon enough. 

There was one spike on the oxygen chart because I didn't sleep with the mouthguard. The thing doesn't seem to help much after all. Figured I couldn't simply solve a four-year problem by shoving something in my mouth. I don't know whether or not I'm going to ask Rhonda for a referral to an ortho because you just can't fight fate and win. My sleep has always been and always will be cursed no matter what I do. Is it really worth fighting a losing battle? If I'm destined to be tired most of the time and I know I should just accept it and live with it. Not much else I can do. I was tired yesterday too, even though that might have been because I slept too little at just 6 hours. Nonetheless, I did sleep with the mouthguard yesterday and still think I could have chronic fatigue on top of apnea. 

Tom says that while he could be wrong, he thinks I stress so much over sleep that I've got a mental block causing the sleep/fatigue issues. Oh, wouldn't that be wonderful! That, I could actually do something about. I doubt he's right, though. This started about six months to a year before we moved. Why then?

While I'm battling fatigue, I do have big and small things to look forward to. We got groceries delivered yesterday so I'm looking forward to making some pork ribs. Also yesterday, the honker got his trailer and loaded the motorcycle into it, and I expect he'll leave this morning. I noticed the golf cart was gone when I got up and that the place looked like he was clearing it out to leave. It's always exciting when I see that trailer show up! I know that soon I'll be faced with a bigger threat to my sleep than the motorcycle but it's still nice to see the snowbirds clear out. 

The honker's got guts driving that thing up the ramp and into the trailer. I'd be terrified on a regular bike let alone a motorcycle. I watched him back down his driveway, start it, and then circle around the block so he could line himself up with the trailer that he parked at the side of his place.

The water company came and turned Ray's water off the day after he left.

The most exciting thing is that the waterbed is coming today! It likely won't be here and set up before I crash, though, so tonight will be my last time sleeping on this cheap dented mattress.

My Temu order came and I love all the stuff. Now that I know how the ballerina clock works, one arm sticking up represents the hour, one leg the minutes, and the other leg the seconds.

The plasma place is still closed and Tom suspects ransomware which companies don't like to admit, especially since it coincides with 911 being down in several states. If it was just a tech issue it would have been fixed by now we'd think. So now, thanks to someone's greed, we're screwed out of that money indefinitely.

An appointment with the glaucoma specialist is scheduled for the 6th, the day Aly died three years ago.