#mostly bc my life is sad LOL how did we get here

[lyekisses]

as if i would blow up the spot without ordering for myself first 😈

[ideas-4-stories]

NOOOOOOOO I LOST THE AU I WROTE FOR YOU 😭😭😭 I LITERALLY SENT IT AND TUMBLR SAID "NETWORK ERROR". L FOR THE WIFI. L. Not cool I'm literally crying I thought that AU was genius. It was a Teacher!Buggy AU with Crocomom and Dadhawk. + Shanks co-parenting Luffy with Crocodile. That note was so long I literally spent like 45 mins writing it here on your ask and it was just. Gone. Or I think it did. Why does life hate me. I'm just gonna be brief with this cuz I still think it's golden lmao. Croco and Mihawk work long hours so their kids (Luffy, Zoro, Perona) have to wait for a few hours until they're picked up by their parents. The school doesn't have school buses bc I said so (no I am not cruel it's just out of my budget /j). So Buggy takes the responsibility to keep them comfortable and entertained while they wait. Croco and Mihawk meeting this charming (and clown looking) blue-haired guy and they start courting him. Shanks gets dragged in on the courting bc of Luffy. Also he was already courting Buggy. I didn't write their process of courting I basically skipped and went,, their wedding will take part in a Goth castle. And the design are all sunshine and rainbows (literally). Sanji, Usopp, Nami, Vivi, Zoro and Luffy being in a class along with other kids. Franky, Robin, Jinbei and Brook are in higher classes. Chopper is atom. Not here in the world yet. Perona is like, 2-3yrs older than her brothers so. Yeah *awkwardly shuffles* (I love perona I swear-). Implied Zosan. Some rando: but you didn't imply shi— Me: Shhh I did. *gaslighting*. Law is also there in the classroom with lower grade strawhats. He's suffering. He only attends 3 days a week tho, he's mostly homeschooled bc of his sickness. He's homeschooled by Cora. (You can pry Law and Cora from my cold dead hands. You can separate them when I dissolve into ashes). Don't worry as he gets older his sickness is cured. Ofc he's cured by Cora. He's saved by Cora in every universe. In every AU. Every Era. Every life they will ever live. I will die on that hill– *applies the nobody dies/everyone lives tag on this AU* let my babies be happy pls. Let my man Cora live and travel the world with this emo boy (Law). Doffy isn't real, he can't hurt anyone. Ace is there. Sabo is there. Every One Piece character is out there somewhere. They're like hidden stones and you have 0.02% of finding them. I thought I was just making a Teacher!Buggy AU but then it turns into a Modern!AU for everyone. Let's gooooo. Sora divorces with Judge and remarry with Zeff so now Sanji lives with all his brothers and his sister. They get separate classrooms tho, and reiju is perona's age so she's besties with her. (I do not play by canon's rules with ages bc i live in my own world) They both tease their brothers (Sanji and Zoro) about their crushes on each other. The heart crew is there. Bepo is a dog, a very fluffy one. Kuina is alive. Kaya is there, same classroom with Usopp. I have no idea how to continue this lmao, but I do hope you find this interesting bc Buggy is 100% great with kids and probably teaches well bc he is a big nerd and makes lessons interesting. (Also, the whole reason why I wrote this instead of letting the idea slip through my mind like the others is bc the image of two goth men courting a clown looking mf was funny to me. So here we are lmao. The way I wrote this makes Shanks look like he's the person they let into their open relationship twice lol I'm so sorry 😭😭)

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

That's really sad, I really like this idea (though I see Shanks and Buggy more as siblings, but I understand the idea of Shuggy) It's fine that this became about so many people, I really like this.

Teacher!Buggy sounds so cool, you know that he's the flashiest and maybe one of the craziness of the things he'll do to get his students good things that will boost their learning. He knows that every kid might not have the same learning paths as others.

How many classes does this man teach? Who knows, too many for how much he gets paid. All teachers needs to get paid more.

I would think Jinbei and Brook being other fun teachers in the school, like Tom could be as well!

I really like this idea, and the imagine of two gothic men trying to court a clown-looking mf is really funny to me as well.

[woso-dreamzzz]

hey! long anon here again… w the (as usual) long asks (oops) sorry about this one again, friend!

rereading the earlier bits of injured for fun (masochism) as a result of my nieces spending the weekend with my family. they’re twins and just turned 3… and it made me wonder what bambi was like pre-neglect. my nieces are so small and so excitable and have so much wonder in their eyes (sometimes tho they sit and stare blankly and it seems like they’re in deep thought lol) and it just hurts to think that bambi could be all giggles and excitement the way they are… but she’s been regressed to an apprehensive version of herself.

in the first part of injured bambi’s really cautious and quiet and quite introspective for a young child. bambi in the second part is probably even younger… since it takes place when jenni and alexia are a thing, and it’s cute to see bambi dotes on jenni the way a kid would to their parent (my nieces are constantly in their mom’s lap or sitting with my mom or something.)

it’s cool but sad because my nieces’ dad started working abroad so they’ve been hanging off my dad and brother—my aunt says it’s because they don’t see their dad as much. what do you think it was like for bambi when jenni was out of the picture initially? would we still see this introspective, sort of apprehensive version of bambi had jenni not left and none of this (olga, jaume, neglect) happened? we find out jenni’s been there for the pregnancy and for bambi’s entire life before she left for mexico. she’s young but i keep thinking that she probably lost a bit of herself seeing my nieces be so happy with some “father figure” given they don’t see their dad often anymore.

and then the part where we see bambi begin to realize the lack of attention she’s getting now that she has a younger brother. she’s 4… i think… and holy moly it brings tears to my eyes because ??????????? no kid should ever have to think about whether their parent/s are going to give them attention. especially at that age. so when bambi hides and waits for her mami… yeah. you made me a jenni stan with that one line… even before jenni-ism/the jenni agenda was a REAL thing. and then you cemented it by making bambi rationalize crying silently because alexia yelled at her the last time she expressed her own emotions when alexia was fussing over a crying jaume.

again i was just wondering if there was a large divide or shift in bambi’s personality given the events of neglect taking place in such an important time for development. she’s forced to mature so quickly and at such a young age and that just hurts. trying to mentally prepare myself for this sunday tho!

1010382 apologies to u and the readers bc of this long ask. it was just a thought (that definitely spiralled bc i love my nieces and i also love bambi) gonna go make more teeny and pequenita/natalia and princesse HCs bc they bring me a lot less pain than bambi does

Don't apologise! Your long asks make me really excited every time I see them!

Obviously, there's a space on Bambi's masterlist now for the Before so there's definitely going to be some younger Bambi coming at some point but she's always been quite introspective. It's just how she is but she wasn't nearly as apprehensive as she is now. But she was still giggly and happy and super cute pre-neglect.

In part II, Jenni was also only Tia Jenni but she definitely took a maternal role without it being an obvious thing (and it was in the cards for her adopting Bambi as well before the breakup). It was difficult at first when Jenni left because she definitely saw Jenni as a motherly figure. Jenni has been in Bambi's life since before she could remember so there was definitely a hole that she and Alexia had to adapt too.

Bambi realising that Jaume gets all the attention is so heartbreaking. In situations like this, there's mostly two options they can go with. There's the acting out to get attention and then there's the withdrawing themselves which is what Bambi did. She withdrew from everyone and stopped trying to get attention. She decided to wait it out to see if it would get better but it never did until Alba took her. Bambi crying silently was actually heartbreaking to write because she knows that she won't be getting attention and there's a chance that she'll get yelled at again.

There was definitely a shift in Bambi's personality pre and post-neglect. She was always reserved and a little introverted (there's actually studies about how children of mothers who suffered with long-term post-partum depression are more likely to suffer from difficulties of social and cognitive functioning, problems in externalising problems and anxiety disorders) but the neglect definitely makes it worse and it's something that she never fully recovers from.

It's a little heartbreaking to actually confirm but Bambi does suffer from long term effects of her neglect. It's never the really extreme things like failure to thrive (but that was borderline) but it does affect her future personality. She never fully goes back to how she was in the Before.

Bambi's in a very delicate part of her development so she's still able to bounce back to an extent but never fully. It went on for a bit too long combined with the medical trauma that she suffered during the same period so older Bambi does end up with a nervous disposition and she's often stuck in her head a little bit. She's got a habit of overthinking sometimes.

If Bambi never got neglected then her personality probably would have ended up wildly different.

[theflyingfeeling]

random thoughts and highlights about the gig at Tapiola Festivaali today 🖤

first fucking row 😭

so idk if it was that that made the show feel exceptionally good, and I find it difficult to rank the BC shows I've been to in any order of excellence, but I'd say this one would go pretty high on that list; their energy was unmatchable and, as always at BC gigs, I truly had the best fun I've ever had 🥺

(which is why I'm still a little dumbfounded and emptyheaded and will probably spend the entire tomorrow crying because I miss them so much and have no idea when I'm gonna see them again jdkdkfjkfkfkf can't they just drop some tour dates for next year soon or at least the "big show" they keep teasing us about so I can experience the serotonin boost of buying another BC concert ticket and have something to look forward to in my sad little life ahaha)

but yeah anyway I am so fucking horny for Aleksi y'all. Wanting him carnally was NOT on my bingo card for this year but here we are 🪦

like. He' just so confident and booby. You know? Cocky bastard. I'd let him *** inside.

@ss4nni caught his stick and we all got to hold and gawk at it. I may have even licked it a little (siis for real sillon kun mukamas nuolasin sitä ni mun kieli oikeesti koski sitä vahingossa lol sori Sanni 🙈)

(too Finnish didn’t understand: I pretended to lick it for the lols but accidentally licked it a little for real. Please pray for me to regain my sanity one of these days)

I definitely am may be a little delusional about a bunch of stuff but I feel like I made eye-contact with Olli one time and then another time when I was doing a little thigh exercise for Left Outside Alone (just pumping up and down instead of just squatting lol ain't just some random dudes gonna tell me what to do)

I waved at Aleksi one time when he came over because yes that's how desperate I was for an interaction with him and he mercifully acknowlwdged my efforts by looking at me and giving me the tiniest nod. So yeah I think I'll name our first-born son Tapio & y'all are invited to the christening 🥰

(unrelated to BC but Abreu performed before them and she winked at me because I'm hot stuff 😌)

got to witness many many many cute Olli/Allu moments (mostly touches) with my bare eyeballs, I feel so blessed and nourished I think I'll live on this for the rest of the year 💗 (she says, knowing very well she will indeed be sobbing her eyes off tomorrow and the whole next week most likely)

I think they all were genuinely impressed by the audience's energy (or at least the first row was fucking fire 🔥🔥🔥🔥) and I know they praise the audience at every show but I'm still gonna go ahead and take their every sweet word as a personal compliment <3

I loved seeing Niko so much? He's a tiny guy and loves crouching so it's not always easy to see him from farther away lol and he was wearing sunglasses the entire show (it was cloudy) but behind the glasses I like to believe he looked at me/us many many times Niko Niko Niko I love Niko 🥰

And Joel was so happy too 😭 happy Joel = happy me, automatically and every time, I need to know when I get to make him happy again by going to see their show, he deserves it and I deserve it 😭😭😭

So yeah, once again BC did what was said on the can: made me forget all about my pathetic little problems and I kinda need that in order to survive so if you need me I shall be refreshing their social media like a junkie asking random passers-by if they happen to have any speed on them, eyes red and visibly shaking because that's how bad I need my next fix

Many many thanks to everyone who hung out and came to say hi!! You all are some of the best people I know, I don't know how you tolerate me or if you even do lol but I'm always laughing so much when I'm with you and I'll miss you guys as much as I'll miss BC 💕💖💕💗💓💞💖

[hilarychuff]

for the ask game :)

i carry it in mine + 3, 13, 14

howl + 9, 15

the ask game

ty for the questions!!

i carry it in mine - tag, ao3

3. what’s your favorite line of narration?

hmm it currently stands at 45k words so hard to pick just one but i'm p sure this was the line that i was like first working towards when i started writing it

He means to make me queen, she thinks, her legs turning to jelly as she sinks to the floor.

like the scenes in chapter 6 and 7 at the wall where he shows her his mark/she realizes the full implications of it all were for sure like one of THEEEE inciting visuals i had

13. what music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

i actually write mostly in silence 😭 i can plot and write notes etc with the tv on or with music on but honestly i usually find it too distracting!!! i'm a big singer alonger and i really need to like. concentrate for the most part when i'm writing for real. nooooo clue what would be a good soundtrack for reading bc i would want vibes to be similar to like medieval period piece stuff so maybe something sort of instrumental???? or like a softly crooning female singer songwriter type of vibe. something a lil folksy perhaps???

actually wait i lied sometimes i listen to asmr videos on youtube!!! not that i recommend that per se lmao. but just a lil something to provide a bit of sensory stimulation so that i don't get like. bored.

14. is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?

hmmmm. i don't think i went into this fic with the intention of like "this is what i want readers to learn" so much as i was like wouldn't if be interesting if... and then if their places were switched....

but i will say that something i didn't expect while writing was how many people would be upset with jon in the beginning for not making sansa his priority number one. which i GET like it's a soulmate fic that's sort of the expectation and it's an uneven expectation because he knows something here that sansa doesn't. but i always kind of felt like.... sure sansa is something different to him here than in canon but at least in the beginning the love is very much the same and exists and always existed???? and i could have done a better job writing TO that if i wanted it to be clear but i think it never occurred to me that it wouldn't be. it's so clear to me in canon how much jon loves his family, including sansa, even though we never actually see them interact for ourselves. but the way he thinks about her is so sweet. and the memories he has of her are very tender.

i think probably for the most part anyone who stuck around found a way to move past that if it felt wrong/unfair to them but i guess if i had one thing i wanted people to learn it would be sometimes that your ability to help someone or be there for them is not always a reflection of the love that you have for them. sometimes circumstances are just complicated. sometimes there's nothing you can do. but that doesn't mean you don't love someone and have love for them and hurt for them and think about them etcetcetc.

i am very much a problem solver in my own life/relationships which i think frustrates people sometimes and also sometimes leaves me feeling useless if someone is upset about something and there's nothing i can do but sometimes just loving someone and making sure they know that is enough !!! not that jon does that either in the beginning i guess lol woops but he's very much a sad boy ok maybe cut him some slack 😭

howl - tag, ao3

9. were there any alternate versions of this fic?

WELL the first howl i banged out in literally a 72 hour period cribbing heavily from an old scream script i found online that wasn't quiiteeee screen accurate and there was only ever one version of that. BUT in the larger grand scheme sense of this i do have notes for a howl 3 and howl 4 so like. not alt versions but additional installments in theory!!

i think there in the initial like "casting" phase if you will i had different notions for what howl 2 would be. bc joffrey was an obvious billy but i was like then who is stu.... and then finagling howl 1 meant some changes for howl 2 but honestly those felt really right to me when i settled on them!!!!!

as for howl 3 that casting has also taken a LOT of finagling that probably still needs some ironing out so that has probably gone through a couple different mental makeovers about how exactly to handle the roman/john milton of it all but rest assured i have lots of thoughts!!!!!!

15. what did you learn from writing this fic?

WELL!!!! actually!!!!! one thing that always bugged me about scream 2 was sidney being an actress and doing theater when it felt so like antithetical to her character to put herself in the spotlight in any capacity. but it's so like baked into the movie that doing howl 2 i was like ok how do i keep it??? and in thinking about that for sansa i considered a lot about the interiority of the character and how like. sure it's putting yourself in the spotlight. but it's also an opportunity to step out of yourself and be somebody different which i think both sidney and sansa are really craving, especially when stab/knifed is putting them on a national stage in a lot of ways. so that was something i hadn't really thought about before!!

i also think there are lots of times watching a horror movie where you see a character doing something and you're like "NO WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT WHY AREN'T YOU DOING XYZ INSTEAD" and then when you're making it like prose narrative as opposed to a script and you're in their head you really have to make it make sense to yourself a lot more (like not just running away after the police car crash scene in scream 2/howl 2) and so that was something i felt like i learned more about too like. yes sometimes you are making a decision because it serves the plot. but also how can you reconcile that action with your character's needs/wants/turmoils/experience etc.

[nikatyler]

𝟚𝟘𝟚𝟚

Time for a recap of the last twelve months! It's basically my tradition at this point. This year was a weird one. I'm not even gonna get into real life issues. It sure was something and I'm going into 2023 with no energy and zero expectations, lol. But with this mindset, I can only be pleasantly surprised, right? Or...the world will show me that when you think it can't get any worse, it will.

Anyway, simblr stuff! This is the year I started drifting away from tumblr. It makes me sad, but really, it just isn't the same as it was when I joined. The interaction is not what I wish to get so I'm simply moving to places where I feel like I'm actually heard and seen. Idk. I've tried a few times to "be the change I wanna see" but it's hard to change stuff around here. But oh well, to each their own. I'll probably stick around, even if I hang out more somewhere else and what you see are mostly queued posts. And, well, if twitter burns down, which I wouldn't be surprised if it did, you know I'll fully come back here. I love this hellsite. Genuinely. It makes me mad but I love it.

But I still love you guys. TS3 discord and a few other people who are not in that discord, I do seriously love you.

So, what was happening on this blog this year?

𝕛𝕒𝕟𝕦𝕒𝕣𝕪

I was still posting my previous BC! Well, I was finishing it. Vi became a parent and hadn't become a cheating jerk yet. 😅

𝕗𝕖𝕓𝕣𝕦𝕒𝕣𝕪

*this* is Vi's cheating jerk era. I still feel bad about how I resolved the whole thing, it was too rushed. I guess I was focusing more on the gameplay part and the NSB rules and less on whether their actions are logical? Prince shouldn't have come back to him, that's the hill I'll die on :D I know, I know, NSB rules and all, but he shouldn't have.

𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕔𝕙

We're slowly moving onto Bloom's very short generation, as well as gen 3 of my lepacy. It's Ginevra's time to shine, but first, we spent a lot of time with the winners of Axel and August's BC.

𝕒𝕡𝕣𝕚𝕝

Bambi and Candy are born, as well as the BC babies. Loads of baby cuteness in April on this blog. Oh and Ross flourishes in his babysitter era. Well, he's always been a babysitter to his descendants, but I feel like this is where he 100 % accepts it 😂

𝕞𝕒𝕪

Gins' era truly starts now (why do I keep saying era in this recap lmao). I had a lot of fun playing in Twinbrook again and Ginevra and Lori were so great. <3

𝕛𝕦𝕟𝕖

Alongside my lepacy (hi Elias & other gen 4 babies), I started posting the pink gen of NSB and also, my 100 Baby Challenge! I still can't believe I actually did that, and that I completed it in like two months only. Wow. What. I mean, yeah, I hyperfocused on it, but still. How did I do that.

𝕛𝕦𝕝𝕪

Again, gen 3 of lepacy and gen 7 of NSB, not much to say here. As for playing, I mostly just played the baby challenge. Oh! And Maeve's BC, of course.

Ohh, and July was the month when I decided to dive into the wonderful sims community on twitter. Probably one of my best decisions this year as I made many great friends there...🥰🥰

𝕒𝕦𝕘𝕦𝕤𝕥

Gen 3 ends and Sawyer is ready to take over Bridgeport but he has to wait for a bit. Pastel enters the blog and her bonding with Ross is seriously one of my most favourite things. I didn't think of this at first when I was playing, it only came to me later when I was posting the generation, but he definitely grew fond of her because she reminds him of Sunset so much ;-;

𝕤𝕖𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕞𝕓𝕖𝕣

Good news: Bambi and Atsuko get married. Bad news: Ross and Caleb break up. *sigh* There's so much to unpack with their breakup storyline. Yes it makes sense that they'd hit a few bumps on the road, yes it makes sense that some of them would be bad, but...deep down, the breakup only happened because of my insecurities and lowkey being afraid of using a townie in my stories. At least I kinda got over that this fall (thank you twitter moots).

More good news: I'm finally posting the BC!!

𝕠𝕔𝕥𝕠𝕓𝕖𝕣

I finished posting the 100BC and...yeah this was Maeve's month. October was also very vampiric, but I'll probably mention that in a separate recap (if I do a separate recap haha), as this one only focuses on my regular daily content (legacies and such)

𝕟𝕠𝕧𝕖𝕞𝕓𝕖𝕣

In November, we saw the funniest twist to ever happen in my BCs. Sorry River :D Aaand we also have the winner of Maeve's BC! I can't wait for you all to see them again in the legacy. Next year, hopefully.

𝕕𝕖𝕔𝕖𝕞𝕓𝕖𝕣

Sawyer's time to shine has come. Well, not really, his siblings are constantly stealing it. Don't be surprised if he one day, you know, steals their organs and sells them.

Oh, and it's also TS3!Ross's time to shine. Because of course it is. I knew I needed to use his TS3 self somewhere, and all things considered, this felt like a perfect time for that.

December was also the month I started posting videos on youtube. I'm sorry if I'm annoying about that, but I just enjoy it so much. Never thought I'd say that. So, if you haven't yet, feel free to check it out (and subscribe maybe? 🥺). I'm hoping to do some fun stuff next year.

What's in store for 2023? I'll probably talk about that later, but to put it simply, I think this blog will be stuck with NSB and lepacy.

Thanks for sticking around with my grumpy self. Here's to a better 2023.

Happy new year, everyone!

[microsuedemouse]

~ 15 questions & 15 friends ~

tagged by my much beloved @czarcaustic <3

1. Are you named after anyone?

My grandfather!! Courtney was his middle name. (That spelling was originally the masculine form of the name, though it's pretty rare to see it used as such these days.) My middle name is also a family name :)

2. When was the last time you cried?

Uhh... oh it was a couple nights ago, when talking with my parents about my Nana. I still miss her a lot

3. Do you have kids?

Nope. At this stage of my life I can't say it feels super likely ever to happen, though I'd be lying if I said I don't feel a twinge of Something when I meet babies at work lol.

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

lmao I have never played any. I am extremely unathletic by nature, and also always struggled to get my brain around the rules of pretty much any of them when I was like, a kid in gym class

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Sure, but not a lot? Probably an average amount I figure

6. What is the first thing you notice about people?

Man, I dunno - probably their faces or their clothes, depending on context?

7. What's your eye color?

Brown!

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Big big fan of both! I'm not a big sad endings guy, though. Even when it feels right for the story, it's usually not my jam. (I guess sometimes sad endings can be good for scary movies, but that's like... sort of its own thing? because it's about The Horror.)

9. Any talents?

This is always a hard question for me to answer, bc I feel like most of the things I'm good at are more skills than talents - they're things I've practiced and developed over time, like with my writing and art. Although I guess it'd be fair, if unusual maybe, to say I've got a couple naturally strong interpersonal skills. I'm very good at communication, including figuring out what other people are trying to say, and I'm also pretty good at making people feel comfortable and understood.

10. Where were you born?

In southern Ontario, in the city where both of my parents did most of their growing up :)

11. What are your hobbies?

Writing (fiction prose, mostly) and the many kinds of thinking that go with it (worldbuilding, character development, etc). Arts and crafts (of many kinds; I'm often bouncing from one thing to another. Currently I'm having lots of fun learning to crochet). Taking in stories (reading books and comics, watching movies and TV, playing games, listening to podcasts - I love stories in all their forms). Goofing off with my family, especially my younger siblings.

12. Do you have any pets?

We have three cats - Neverland, Louie, and Smudge :)

13. How tall are you?

Uhh my ID says 165 cm, so that's... 5'5"-ish? I'm genuinely so incapable of remembering that on my own, for some reason.

14. Favorite subject in school?

It was usually English and art, growing up. In university it was always my courses that delved into genre fiction - science fiction, children's lit, the fairy tale... also that graphic novel seminar I took

15. Dream job?

Iiii. [sweats] I wanna be a novelist, but also, that's hard in its own way, and I think it's gonna take me a while yet to really Get There in terms of my own skills, disregarding the challenges of publishing. Beyond that... is something I've been struggling a lot with lately, because it's hard for me to imagine myself in a job where I'm both content and competent, let alone able to support myself. I've been wondering a lot again about library sciences, lately, but I just don't know. It's tough out here!

I definitely don't have 15 people to tag, but. @izupie @werewolfin @serenabeanie @womanaction @mana-sputachu perhaps, if you're feelin' it?

[heleizition]

DAMN not me being like whos cody and the plot post being like GODS FUCKING CLONE CHILD. tell me everything we love an apocalypse harbinger. also CAIN MY BOI poor baby needs that therapy. also the whole 'and god thought mh well i liked that lets try again'? chefs kiss. I Wish To Know The Past Lives by you categorised as kinda boring THING pls. does cain get a bestie? someone give this man a bigger support and luv system. also vik is a BABY? a former child. A BABY!! also W HA T is that fuckery with jasper tell me absolutely everything please

SHES MY FAVORITE WEIRDO GIRL I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHES HOLY AND BRINGS A RELIGIOUS FLAVOR OF TERROR THAT I. CARE ABOUT <===== guy who was not raised religious at all idk why im so into it

so in the plot post i mentionned there's a memory thing. everyone remembers bits here and there of their past life, and usually demons mostly remembers bad things they did bc thats how u manipulate people into doing more things that are . not good. cody and jasper are the only ones with no memories of past life bc they were created in this realm, and had no past life. she has no idea she's god's soldier, They sent her down there mostly for Their own entertainement and everything she does is her own choice and will, even if god can "feel it" (which is why . they end up sending the whole lil family back on earth . for a chance to be happy. bc they feel cody's happiness.)

for the rest :

past lives ! um ill put lil warnings before. each lives.

Nell & Belly : tw for child abuse, sexual abuse and exploitation, adults not helping like they should lol

Nell and Belly (btw their full names are Nathanel and Anabelle) are born twins, nell just a few minutes before his sister. their mother died at birth which sent their father (an already not . good guy) into deep constant rage and pain . once they grow up a bit . i mean like. 7 or so. theres sexual abuse happening . and beatings. selling out his kids for a night for money. nothing fun. nell and belly get through it together until at like 16 nell (who's like, underfed, short, no muscles) snaps and stabs their dad over and over again .

nell only remembers this, killing his dad, with absolutely no context behind (protecting himself, protecting his sister, freeing them) so he thinks he used to be a Bad person. after that they get placed in the system, ig theres a trial but its ruled as legitime defense, and once they're 18 belly just. vanishes. they both deal very differently with what their whole life was, nell cant go on, can barely support himself, thinks he should have died right then, and belly flees from nell to find . somewhere where she can forget. she regrets it but nell dies before she can reconnect (not sure how, his death isn't rly whats important here,,, im thinking . so numb he can't rly recognize whats around him . walk in front of a car. yeah). belly struggles to have a happy life after that and ... im not sure how she dies yet. im thinking drowning bc its a thing that almost happens in the farm au....

as an angel, she doesnt remember much, because there wasn't much happiness in her life. also these two as twins have a bond that still connect them in angel/demon realm ! so they know the other exist and they remember once they meet !!

eden : tw for transphobia, drugs, suicide, abusive family ?

i'll go short w him bc it's not pleasant and it makes me sad <==== guy who MADE this backstory

eden is trans, always feels out of place as a kid, as a teen. his parents kick him out at eighteen bc they "can" and bc even if eden never said anything, they Know and don't want him in here. he has a friend who helps for a while, until the rumors spread about him being a ~ freak ~ and his friend is like. im sorry my parents cant let u impose in the house. anymore. : /// . eden is lost and desperate and doesn't know what to do, sells himself, gets into drugs to get through the days, finds out the days aren't worht getting through, kills himself. yay

he's one of the few who's always remembered his past fully,,,

LENA lena my BABYGIRL um tw for war mostly

this happens in a fictif medieval era lmao she's the princess of a kingdom, daughter of a kind king and queen, destined to rule, fighting among the army already, everyone loves her, except her small kingdom gets torn apart by another kingdom, not that much bigger, but with much greater military strength. the country gets torn apart before the army, the king and queen can do anything. the enemies arrive to the capital and lena doesn't even ask and joins the vanguard. she uses a sword at this point, get through enemies after enemies, and it looks like there's hope, until one of the enemy's captain reach her. it's a bit of a eowyn versus the nazgul vibe in lotr except lena doesn't win. she's slain, and slowly dies on hte battlefield with her beloved country burning, and the people she swore to protect screaming and dying.

she's very loved. i care her so much. she's my default when idk what to draw :3 she remembers being a loved princess, and slowly remember the last fight. it haunts her, the weight of losing this fight, that she couldn't do more, even if it's from a time long gone.

titania ummmm well theres grooming. witch hunt and betrayal.

i have to research the exact period titania's past happens, but its between late 1400 and early 1600s i think !

she loses her parents very young and thus, is cared for by the local church. there's a priest here who teaches her to use her looks and innocence as a way to get things, information, food, anything. once she's 13/14, he starts showing her the more physical way to do so.

she starts using sex as a way to learn things. she's the person who knows the most about anyone in the village. she's an important figure, one who's gifted things to keep silent, who gives her body in exchange for things to hang up against someone. she hates the priest who made her who she is . she couldn't have been something else, happier, lighter, but she's this, and she's too deep in to just stop.

she's too powerful, she knows too much, and when there's word in the village of a witch inhabiting it, they all turn to her. they have a way to get rid of her and the power she holds over them. she screams what she knows when she's brought to the center of the village, screams her hate of the priest who made her who she is, destroys everyone's nice little life because it cost hers. she dies burning, and everyone chooses to act like they never heard her in her final day.

she's the wise calm one who's actually full of anger and wrath. i love her a lot. there's this french song i love ("a witch like any other") which talks abt . women. women and men treating women like they're granted. and like. its a titania song. if u wanna give it a listen this version is amazing altho it's more powerful if u know french....

VIK UM OKAY not much tw here. it's just fucking sad. im a terrible oc parent. it's also heavily inspired by hell's girl season 3's protagonist past..................... it's basically that tbh SOEJFEFSJS

his mother and him are not allowed in the village. his mother is sick. he doesn't know it, he just follows his mother. she's kind and beautiful, gives him food and tells him stories. he's 4. they can't get in the village and he doesn't know why, so they find dry places in the woods to live. it's fun, it's everything he's ever known. one day his mother doesn't wake up, so he goes to try and find food by himself, to surprise her. when he's back, she's still not awake. she's stiff and cold, so he gives her his blanket and waits. days pass. he's hungry, he's thirsty, he's 5, he doesn't know anything, doesn't know how to go on, the usually places he finds bits of food are empty. it's colder and his mother hasn't moved since that day.

it's snowing. it's pretty. he wishes his mom could wake up and see it but he's starting to think that maybe she won't.

vik dies, age 5, in the forest, cold hungry and alone.

he doesn't remember anything, and his ignorance nd naivety makes him so much easier for noah to manipulate him. she doesn't mean to at first, she sees a child who could use some help, and she's always wanted a child. but they're at war, and sacrifices need to be made.

ABEL AND CAIN'S PAST ISNT CLEAR TO ME RN IM SORRYYYYY SOMETHING ABT ABEL BEIGN A RULER AND CAIN HIS SHADOW WHO KILLS FOR HIM YAGHHHHHH IDK MAN abel slowly remembering that he was a mercyless king who made his people suffer just like hte people he's trying to fight rn,,,,,,,,,,, honey

i don't have much planed for cain in tame of support rn im sowwy.................... i wanna work on it tho.......... i have a lot of secondary charactres that he could fit with...............

noah used to be a cool fearless pirate stealing rich people to give to the poor in her hometown mostly. finding strays and helping them. i love that for her . she was a good guy, a robin hood, and then her devotion to god fucked her up (aka hermit the frog by marina). she jst fights bc she thinks it will bring peace until she learns god was just Bored lol !!!!!!!!!!!!!

i don't think i forgot anyone ? if i did i am sorry (bows down to my kids)

jasper's thing......................... well. there's always been experiments. trying to find a being Higher. jasper was created in a lab. then he and another kid, angel this time, were fused. the scar is most likely due to this . for the longest time jasper just thought he had a strong inner voice but it's this other kid (no name yet sowwy!!!!!!! im coming up with this on the spot actually which is why i like being asked abt them it makes me THINK). he's the only saved experiment from this. abel and cain had been sent to investigate on a demon who's part of the high council, but who some people thought was shady. he indeed was. they destroyed eveything (u don't toy with life) and found jasper. omg . they both kind of raised him . ohhhhhhhhhhhhh OHHHHHHH

anyway later in the story, belly and him are fighting opponent, belly is cool and strong but she almost dies and well . those two are in love and it makes jasper's inner angel wake up along with some new powers. not sure exactly what!!!! im thinking !!!! ok i gotta go grocery show now BE BACK SOON BC I SEE MORE THINGS IN MY INBOX

[thatbitchsimone]

Thank you that’s very sweet, you’re very kind

I just read and observe people and then after some time I eventually pick up on their habits and the way they talk and that’s what I did while learning English

Obviously I knew English because I learnt it in school but I never spoke it and I wasn’t great at communicating in it because where I live we usually speak my mother tongue which is pashto and urdu (I live in pakistan btw)

I’m 20 so before I was 17 when I started learning, that too because I got into this phase where I didn’t like talking to people and just reading and writing and on my phone and the quarantine really helped lol so that made me learn English and eventually get introduced to all the western media

And I because I had been always very close to my family so we watched the same shows and I wasn’t really at all on social media, probably because the lack of knowing English so I felt kind of insecure being on social media if I wasn’t able to understand the stuff on it, so no idea of western celebs or anything like that (I knew the very famous ones like angelina jolie etc because once I saw her face printed on a bag while I was shopping when I was like 12 and I though she was gorgeous anyways I’m rambling!!! Now hahah)

Anyways the point is, sometimes it makes me feel like, social media and real life are two different planets because the stuff on it so flabbergasting and weird (but also it has its many good sides and effects as well like talking to people and that’s great for me cause I love talking to people) but What kind of makes me sad is that it’s not 2 different planets, it’s all the same and the people who are so unkind and crazy on the internet are among us

It’s very weird

loved reading this! thank u so much

i mostly learned english from reading and watching movies etc as well actually but then again i was very young (i was fully fluent by the time i was around 9 i think) and children pick up languages very fast and i live in sweden where american and english media and pop culture is very widespread and part of the culture (probably bc sweden is a western country and america is very dominant in western media in general) so people learn english very well and easily here like swedes are known for it and foreigners often struggle to learn swedish bc the natives all switch to english when they notice u dont speak swedish so lots of foreigners and immigrants have to straight up ask people to talk to them in swedish more so they can learn and practice it lol but i think that goes to show that the best way to learn a language is to watch and read media in that language and observe it in casual conversation rather than just go by how ur taught it in classes etc

i honestly think its a good thing that u didnt partake in social media when u were younger. i think a lot of the people that dont seperate social media from real life are the ones who started using it early so they have almost spent more time in the social media and online world than the actual real world and get less real world interactions than online ones. i think its very unhealthy to not be able to seperate the 2 and just like u said, the online world and the real world are 2 different things and people forget that they are interacting with real living humans thru the screen and thats when it gets toxic and crazy and hostile. people kind of lose their social skills when they only interact with others behind a screen and its very concerning. ive always talked to ppl online the way i would talk face to face and its always weird to me when others dont do the same bc its like would u say these things ur saying online if the person was face to face with u? if u wouldnt then just dont. its cowardly and embarrassing behavior and its just gonna rot ur brain and soul and make u lose touch with reality and how u connect to others on a human level

[feuqueerfire]

My Stand-In Ep 12 Live Blogging

Sadness and despair at the fact that I couldn't watch it yesterday because I got home at like almost 10 and had a few other things I had to do. but today's the day!! Mostly spoiler-free except the very last (??) scene with the ramen on the table lmfao

Ep 12 (July 13)

Joe never escaping Ming's clutches fr

oh, the Sol and Ming convo is nice ig

the mothers speaking together

MingJoe are cute for no reason

lmfao Joe gonna be hungry as fuck if he waits for Ming to feed him bc ppl keep interrupting

Ming's apology

even the dad came around, I was kinda expecting that because in romance shows, generally the wealth isn't actually permanently cut off, they either get their inheritance back or they build it up again by themself

i still had Tong though agh can't we at least kill him? and also hashtag free May

what the hell Joe, take the fucking credit

well IIIII don't think Tong deserves a second chance!

I don't want May with Tong T.T and I don't wanna see them talk either, why the hell would I wanna see Tong get a happy ending aghh

Tong daring to ask May if she'd still love him if he didn't have fame oh my godddd i need to kill him

being reminded that Joe looks like a different Joe is the worst even though maybe they should actually remind the audience more often lol

who even is that? are we pairing Sol up randomly at the last second. oh well idc

idgaf about the brother and secretary Jim romance either i've gotta be honest

a cute dinner with Ming's mom, how sweet

oh yeah, I've remembered that the guy who's a Sol fan is a styling who's Joe's friend

the way Joe's original life ended and all the people who still remember him is so tragic man

i never really cared much about Joe's movie journey because it felt so hand-fisted every time like start as a support c'monnn

ah, starting their relationship all over again

"You can't stop me" makes another appearence

lmfao the ramen bowl shaking and the sneeze. cute

I wish this ep had more Ming/Joe scenes alone or even like cutely together (the dinner with mom was cute).

Overall:

How does Ming live knowing he never faced Joe's original body while having sex?! That fact will haunt me like this show I feel like didn't touch enough on the horrors and despair of a permanent body switch bc I think in most fiction, the people switch back but here... Joe is just stuck in this random guy's body forever while his own body was cremated... horrific omg.

I knew going into the show that Ming is supposedly a terrible person who treats Joe shittily and Joe keeps going back to it and I think that preparation helped me really enjoy the show. The show redeems Ming by the end but it doesn't necessarily pretend that Ming actually treated Joe well back then, Ming's shittiness was the point. It's a fun show and I was excited to see Ming realize how much Joe truly meant to him rather than his crush on Tong.

I found Ming and Joe so cute together man, like when the times were good, they were soooooo good. I know people at the start wanted Joe to grow a spine and move on but I was curious how they'd make it work.

Why did they try to redeem Tong at the end?! I still hate that guy and May should've divorced him fr, I also can't fucking believe he dared to ask "would you still like me if I wasn't famous, May?" like motherfuckerrrr she's staying with you despite you causing so much trouble and getting into so much debt, how dare you accuse her of such shallow things? You're the one who is there for money, you piece of shit. aghhhhh fuck him fr

I feel like this ship would be soooo good for character study fics but I'm not skilled up, how sad.

Overall, a good show, definitely one of the better BLs this year and one where I wasn't disappointed compared to the hype.

Rating: 7/10

[blimbie]

10/30/22

first time on tumblr in a while ! obvs since it's been more than 4 years since my last post, a lot has changed/happened in my life. Here are some things in no particular order:

have my own apartment, 2 cats, nice car

uhh covid happened. and is still happening

I started working part time as a teller at a bank at the beginning of 2019, went to full time, became a universal teller, then moved to a different branch as a head teller

tomorrow I start a new position in the company at the ops center as a call center rep. I'm nervous but am optimistic about it, bc it seems like I will actually be valued by my boss there

former boss from when I was a head teller was so manipulative and caused me so much anxiety that I developed chronic fatigue and gastroparesis. got intermittent FMLA time bc of how much it affected me

trying to decide whether I report anything to HR about how much I've suffered bc of my former boss

before I had my apartment my family moved to the next town over with my nana and papa all into one house. I left bc never being alone and having my papa around all the time was affecting my mental health

berni died a month or so ago... still very sad from that but trying not to dwell on it, bc I dont think she would want me to

been experiencing a lot of uncontrollable anxiety for a while, lately making my heart beat really fast, but I'm trying to use art (mostly zentangle and wood-painting projects) to ground myself

I still talk with Charlene. it's over the phone now bc of covid, we have appointments once a week

I visit my family multiple times a week, a lot of times to have dinner when I get out of work. I love them all very much and think that having my own apartment has helped me enjoy my time with them more.

money is p tight right now for me, I'm *just* making it with rent and electric and copays etc. Hoping to get a raise soon after I switch positions

my parents still have edie and winnie, and they begrudgingly coexist. we couldnt find a home for winnie and couldnt bear to part with another dog...no major incidents since the one in my last post

ginnie got a kitten and named him Moose! he never stops moving and loves to play and bite lol. he was a barn kitten from my friend. my parents absolutely love him and wish he were theirs

ginnie has a boyfriend now and hes really nice. I think theyve been together for like 2 years now? they went to elementary school together and reconnected thru some video game. he has proven to really be a genuinely good person over this past summer bc ginnie went into this spiraling anxiety episode that lasted months, and was still supportive of her the whole time. (I know that should be the bare minimum, but he also like was very mature about it, took the time to comfort her, and did not even express that he was overwhelmed, bc that would have been perfectly understandable.) shes still recovering from it and takes meds for it, and also has a therapist she speaks with like once a week. she seems to be doing a lot better and is willing to try to go out and do things

today, I'm going to visit my parents house for dinner and cake to celebrate getting this new position. atlas was gonna go but they decided to stay home bc they're tired (which is fair)

atlas has a serious boyfriend and lives with him in their bosses' house on the 3rd floor. they have Moose's brother, who I named Scrump, along with Gruffen and Matt's puppy named Ripley. things have not been easy for atlas and matt but they are working together to try and make a good life for each other

...right now, I am sitting on my couch with my cat Mochi in my lap. he is warm and loves me a lot. he wants to be with me all the time. hes also a dummy and loves to run around and cause trouble. Maisie is either in my room all cozy or in her kitchen window bed all cozy. she loves me very much too, just in a less blatant way than Mochi. I got maisie first and have known her since she was like 2 weeks old. she was a barn kitten and is now 2 years old. she can be a brat but she is my brat and I love her so much too

...thats all I can think of right now. although things have been shaky and my anxiety can be unpredictable, I have a good support system and as long as I try my best, that's all anyone can ask for.

[animeomegas]

MY FELLOW ANON ARE VIOLATING MY EMOTIONS TODAY 😂 god I’m acc crying. Your writing is amazing. I’m gonna combat the sadness with a wholesome thing of them finding a pup in a bin (or something) a few months after the loss of the first pup (Neji is currently shut down entirely) is like “lol gimme”. Proceeds to take the pup home, put it in his nest scent the lil bean (gender is your choice) and just be like “yeah this mine now”. Any nay sayers are ignored bc it’s still his baby (maybe almost like his pup reincarnated 👀👀) regardless of how baby was obtained. Idk I just think my guy needs some positivity after life kicking the ever loving shit out of him

This is beautiful and you’re right, Neji deserves the world, but I’ll settle with a quiet life and some happiness for my boy!

Okay, so things haven’t been…good with Neji since you had to let your pup die to save him.

It has been two months and still he lays in his nest every day, sometimes crying, sometimes whining, but mostly just staring at nothing. He had incorporated a bunch of baby stuff (blankets, toys etc.) into his nest before he went to the hospital, in order to make his pup feel more at home in the nest when he was supposed to bring them back. You had tried to take them out to stop him having to be confronted with what happened in his safe space, but Neji almost attacked you for doing so, so you let him keep them.

But it’s very concerning when he spends hours at a time just stroking the pup's blankets and staring at nothing.

So, you decide to take Neji on a walk to get him out of the house. It would be his first time leaving the house since the funeral.

You go at night time, because Neji is still refusing any contact with anyone he knows and this way he’s less likely to be confronted when he isn’t ready for it. To make extra sure that you can be alone, you decide to walk around the edge of the woods around one of the quieter training grounds.

Neji doesn’t speak much, but he doesn’t whine or cry either, and the night air brings a little colour to his cheeks, and you’re so happy at the small improvements. It doesn’t matter how long it ends up taking him to feel better, you’ll be here with him the whole way.

…

“I was thinking about cooking something special next week,” you make idle conversation, not expecting Neji to reply. “It’s our anniversary after all, do you have any preference?”

Neji stops walking suddenly. His shoulders are tense.

“Neji?”

He hushes you harshly.

“I can hear…”

Without another word of warning, Neji makes his way a little further into the trees. You follow him, confused and worried.

“Byakugan!” he calls, scanning the area. He gasps as he scans over a nearby bush and immediately he drops to his knees beside it.

“Neji?” you ask, now more than a little concerned. “What is it? What’s wrong?”

You watch as Neji pulls something out of the bush. He turns around with a bundle in his arms.

“It’s a pup,” Neji says, obviously shocked. You can’t blame him, you’re feeling more than a little shocked yourself. What on earth was a pup doing out here? “They’re freezing. Give me your jacket.”

Without hesitance, you quickly slip your jacket of and hand it to Neji who promptly bundles up the pup in it and brings them to his chest. The pup is making small whimpering noises that had been almost impossible to hear over the wind. Neji must have hear them, thank goodness.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” Neji coos to the pup. “You’re safe now, I'll take you home and make it better, I promise.”

“We need to get them to the hospital asap," you say, shaking your head. "They must be freezing and they look underweight as well. We’re not mednin, Neji.”

“Our home is closer.”

“Neji…”

“We need to make sure they’re warm,” he argues. “We can bring them home and alert a medic to make a home visit.”

You look at the earnest look on his face and know that he won’t back down, and now isn’t a time for arguments anyway.

“Okay,” you swallow nervously. “We’ll bring them home.”

…

You bring the pup back to your home and before you can protest, Neji brings them into his nest with a mumbled ‘they’ll be warm in there’.

Neji bundles himself and the pup up in the corner of the nest, turning on a little heater beside him, and tucking the pup into his shirt to share body warmth.

“We’ll get you nice and warm, it’s okay, you’re safe, I won’t let anyone harm you,” he whispers while stroking their cheek with a finger. The pup wriggles around, already looking more energetic, and starts mouthing at Neji’s chest.

“Are you hungry?” Neji laughs softly before turning to you. “Go and heat up a bottle for the pup, all the supplies are in the… the nursery.”

You nod dumbly and do as you’re asked, astounded at how much life is in Neji’s eyes. It’s the most life you’ve seen from him in months. But you can’t help but worry. What if Neji gets attached and you can’t keep the pup? Of course, you want nothing more than to keep the baby, it almost seems too good to be true that she literally fell into both your lives at this trying time, but what if it is too good to be true? What if they’re sick? Or their parents are looking for them? Or… something else. Neji doesn’t deserve another heartbreak, and you don’t want to destroy the small amount of progress he’s made in the last month.

But for now, all you can do is heat up the bottle.

…

“Here, it’s a good temperature, I already checked,” you pass Neji the bottle. He checks it again anyway and you can’t help but smile at how overprotective and parental he's being. It's so bittersweet to see him like this.

“Here you go sweetheart, just for you,” Neji smiles, cradling the pup as they latch onto the bottle with fervour. “Shh, shh, shh, slow down, it’s not going anywhere.”

Neji feeds the pup and then burps them, and you pretend you can’t see him smiling when he notices that they are starting to smell like him. You need to know you can keep her before you let him get even more attached.

“I’m going to send a clone for a medic, now.”

The room became tense all at once.

“They’re fine, I’m looking after them,” Neji protests.

“I know, and you’re doing a good job, but we still need a medic, Neji.”

Neji holds the pup more tightly to his chest, tucking an extra blanket around them. He's using the special blanket you had got commissioned for your pup. You can feel your heart break at the sight. He's already attached. Now you just have to hope you can keep them. For his sake.

“I don’t want them to take the pup away like last time,” Neji admits softly. "I can look after them, I won't let anything happen like last time, I promise. They'll be safe, we don't need a medic."

“We need to know their primary and secondary gender, omega, and we need to make sure they aren’t sick after being left in the woods…”

Neji hesitates but nods his consent in the end after you explain that your pup could become ill if left untreated. You don’t tell him that you are also sending a clone to the Hokage. Naruto will be able to grant you and Neji the right to keep the pup, and you hope that as Neji’s friend, he’ll be able to see how much he needs this.

…

You have to move Neji and the pup downstairs to wait for the medic, because Neji would not appreciate someone unknown seeing his nest he made for his pup. He’s not expecting Naruto to show up as well so you go to the door to intercept and prep them both.

“Thank you so much for coming, Naruto, I can’t tell you how much this means to me and Neji,” you say, hugging him as he walks through the door.

“I’m going to do everything I can,” he promises. “If the medic finds signs of long-term neglect, I can take the parental rights away from the biological parents straight away, even if I don't know who they are, and transfer you the rights.”

Your face visibly brightens, but Naruto continues.

“But if the only injuries are from laying in the forest for a few hours, I’ll have to try and find the parents first, because the child may have been taken from them by force, when the pup was otherwise a healthy baby being looked after sufficiently. In that circumstance, I’ll have to take the child back with me and put them in foster care until a three-month window has passed. And if the parents are found…”

“I know,” you sigh. “Let’s just get this done as soon as possible.”

The three of you walk into the living to see Neji cradling the pup tightly against his chest.

“Hey Neji,” Naruto greets softly with a sad smile. “I haven’t seen you around for a while.”

Neji tenses upon seeing Naruto.

“Naruto? Why are you here?” Neji clearly misinterprets the situation, holding the pup even more tightly and turning accusatory eyes against you. “Why did you bring him here?”

“I’m here to determine whether the pup was abandoned or kidnapped to the best of my abilities, once we have that done, we can decide how things are going to happen, okay?”

“How do you decide that?” Neji asks with distrustful eyes.

“The medic will give them a check-up, completely routine, I promise,” Naruto speaks with a soft voice like he’s talking to a cornered animal. Well, you look at Neji for a moment who is coiled as tightly as spring, he’s not far off.

It takes about five minutes for you to convince Neji to let go of the pup and hand them to the mednin, and then the next fifteen minutes involve you holding him in your arms to stop him wrestling the pup back from the mednin.

And then, rather ominously, the mednin pulls Naruto aside to talk.

Neji is shaking in your arms.

“It’s okay, calm down, Neji,” you try to comfort him.

“I can’t-“ Neji chokes, hands fisting in your shirt. “He has our pup, you let them take our pup.”

You don’t bother to correct him on his use of ‘our’, knowing it would only upset him more.

“I know baby, but they need to see that they’re healthy, nothing’s wrong, just breathe.”

Neji doesn’t take your advice.

"Last time they took them-"

"This isn't like last time, omega. Come one, try and settle down a little, that's it."

...

Naruto eventually walks back in, holding the pup securely, the mednin nowhere to be seen.

“So,” Naruto says seriously. And then his face breaks out into a wide grin. “Am I right in thinking you want to adopt?”

You can almost feel your relief in the air. Thanking every power that be for this stroke of luck. Losing this pup could have easily meant losing your mate, and the gravity of the situation all comes crashing down at once. Neji looks as though he is feeling much the same.

“Give me them,” he orders, arms out.

“Her,” Naruto corrects. “The mednin said she’s a female alpha.”

Tears start welling up in Neji’s eyes as he takes her. Their bio pup was a female alpha, too.

“Thank you,” he whispers to no one, holding his new pup as tightly as he dared. “I’ve got you now, you’re safe and sound with me, I won’t let anything hurt you ever again.”

Naruto slips out of the house without a fuss, dropping the mednin’s recommendations for feeding the underweight pup on the coffee table.

...

You and Neji take your new pup upstairs and bundle her back into the nest. Neji lays down with her, stroking her cheek as he watches her sleep.

“You need to get some rest too, omega,” you suggest, running a hand down Neji’s back.

“Guard?” he asks in response.

“Yes," you smile at his protective instincts. "I’ll guard the nest while you sleep, I promise.”

“Okay, alpha…” Neji settles down, still with one hand resting on the pup. “But if I don’t wake up when she cries, wake me… I want to be the one to feed her.”

You laugh gently, “Of course, now get some sleep. I’ll guard you both.”

[justanartisticduck]

Warning: eyestrain, LONG post (please please tumblr don’t ruin the quality ;u;), implied abuse, death/harm, fire, teeth..? And glitchy effect, please look elsewhere if these make you uncomfy.

HEYA ITS ME AGAIN AND I SPENT ALMOST 5 HOURS STRAIGHT MAKING THIS :DDDDD

SO! This is a little thingy I did based off a song called “Neighborhood #2 (Laika)” by Arcade Fire! Now, earlier I made a post saying how this song really reminded me of my Duck interpretation regarding both their past and future- now this is mostly based off the meaning/references of this song, now I won’t get into too much detail, especially since one of the references is EXTREMELY dark and sad SO I’ll summarize by saying the themes I decided to focus on here! First being the topic of running away from a… not so great life.. And second being a death that was MEANT to happen- (both themes were discovered by the music video and also by some research-) NOW I chose these themes since they.. directly correlate with my Duck (both being that their childhood was.. not great.. and by the fact they LITERALLY DIE IN THE SERIES-) hence why this song reminds me of them so much <3 So yeah! Now i wanted to protray so much but alas i was limited to only a canvas- (some day i will make an animatic of this.. some day <33) BUT i did try representing a few things here!! First off at the top of the canvas we have Malicia, i put here here mostly cuz if the lyrics but also bc she was the first person who influenced Robin’s long line of misfortune. Alongside that we have younger Robin, to go along with Malicia.. Now before you ask their feathers are brown here because this is before they had started dying their feathers green and the reason they had wings was because birds thought it was cool AND they also recently have been thinking about that one legend abt Icarus flying too close to the sun with his wax wings and ended up falling into the ocean because of this- (listen birds has had a LOT on their mind lately leave me alone-) AJYWAYS so they also have some odd red lines surrounding them as you can see- now these are supposed to be spider lilies (which, if you dont know why they are important here, search their meaning) NOW these were supposed to be more detailed but I literally couldn’t make them more detailed for it is late and birds has been drawing this for hours- SO yeah!! Next we see both the feathers which are falling from Robin’s wings and the stem of one of the spider lilies which reside nearby current Robin who now bears their classic green feathers. Now i don’t have much to say here about them in this portion of the thingy BUT i like to think this is them pre June 19th, this also is supposed to correlate slightly with what is below them.. BUT i like to think THIS is them upon realizing Roy is a bad person, this is them upon loosing their friend Daisy (which may or may not have been referenced by the flowers covering their eyes- 👀), this is them upon the time that.. for once in all their time knowing eachother… they and red weren’t on great terms- So, their distrust for Roy continues to the next shot but, instead, here they are not just distrustful of Roy… but also.. they fear him here- Alongside that this is where the stem of the spider lily ends, where their lost feathers transform into teeth which, note, belong to the monster can- (and also notice, it seems as if the teeth are about to bite onto Robin… gee, wonder what thats referencing lol-) and then Roys hands are now surrounding the duck as they look with pure fear.. this is where the canvas ends… and… well… considering the themes and foreshadowing already present- im sure you know what this likely means for them-

Now thats it for the main description as to what birds was thinking upon making this!! NOW uh this all was inspired by the song mentioned previously and yeah!! (Also small thing i wanna mention but i personally like to believe Robins brother, Rodney, is the one singing here, out of greif and anger, but thats just my personal silly thought hehe- >:3) BUT i am so SO happy with how this came out!! There are a few things i messed up BUT I DONT CARE THIS MAKES ME FEEL ACCOMPLISHED AND I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED THIS!! Seriously i hope yall thought it was as cool as i thought it was :3 Anywho, goodbye and i hope yall liked this!! :DD

(Also side note: not to be annoying but please reblog this- i spent literal hours making this and im really happy with how this came out and i would appreciate it if you could reblog this- you don’t have to BUT i would still appreciate it!!! Ty <333 -sincerely, a tired Duck)

[shkspr]

hi. on your post where you may or may not have ended on 'moffat is either your angel or your devil' did you have maybe an elaboration on that somewhere that i could possibly hear about. i'm very much a capaldi era stan and i've never tried to defend the matt smith era even though it had delightful moments sometimes so i wonder where that puts me. i'd love to hear your perspective on moffat as a person with your political perspective. -nicole

hi ok sorry i took so long to respond to this but i dont think you know how LOADED this question is for me but i am so happy to elaborate on that for you. first a few grains of salt to flavor your understanding of the whole situation: a. im unfairly biased against moffat bc im a davies stan and a tennant stan; b. i still very much enjoy and appreciate moffat era who for many reasons; and c. i hate moffat on a personal level far more than i could ever hate his work.

the thing is that its all always gonna be a bit mixed up bc i have to say a bunch of seemingly contradictory things in a row. for instance, a few moffat episodes are some of my absolute favorites of the rtd era, AND the show went way downhill when moffat took over, AND the really good episodes he wrote during the rtd era contained the seeds of his destruction.

like i made that post about the empty child/the doctor dances and it holds true for blink and thats about it bc the girl in the fireplace and silence in the library/forest of the dead are good but not nearly on the same level, and despite the fact that i like them at least nominally, they are also great examples of everything i hate about moffat and how he approached dw as a whole.

basically. doctor who is about people. there are many things about moffats tenure as showrunner that i think are a step up from rtd era who! actual gay people, for one! but i think that can likely be attributed mostly to an evolving Society as opposed to something inherent to him and his work, seeing as rtd is literally gay, and the existence of queer characters in moffats work doesnt mean the existence of good queer characters (ill give him bill but thats it!)

i have a few Primary Grievances with moffat and how he ran dw. all of them are things that got better with capaldi, but didnt go away. they are as follows:

moffat projects his own god complex onto the doctor

rtd era who had a doctor with a god complex. you cant ever be the doctor and not have a god complex. the problem with moffats era specifically is that the god complex was constant and unrepentant and was seen as a fundamental personality trait of the doctor rather than a demon he has to fight. he has the Momence where you feel bad for him, the Momence where he shows his humility or whatever and youre reminded that he doesnt want to be the lonely god, but those are just. moments. in a story where the doctor thinks hes the main character. rtd era doctor was aware that he wasnt the main character. he had to be an authority sometimes and he had to be the loner and he had to be sad about it, but he ultimately understood that he was expendable in a narrative sense.

this is how you get lines like “were the thin fat gay married anglican marines, why would we need names as well?” from the same show that gave you the gut punch moment at the end of midnight when they realize that nobody asked the hostess for her name. and on the one hand, thats a small sticking point, but on the other hand, its just one small example of the simple disregard that moffat has for humanity.

incidentally, this is a huge part of why sherlock sucked so bad: moffats main characters are special bc theyre so much bigger and better than all the normal people, and thats his downfall as a showrunner. he thinks that his audience wants fucking sheldon cooper when what they want is people.

like, ok. think of how many fantastic rtd era eps are based in the scenario “what if the doctor wasnt there? what if he was just out of commission for a bit?” and how those eps are the heart of the show!! bc theyre about people being people!! the thing is that all of the rtd era companions would have died for the doctor but he understood and the story understood that it wasnt about him.

this is like. nine sending rose home to save her life and sacrifice his own vs clara literally metaphysically entwining her existence w the doctor. ten also sending rose with her family to save her life vs river being raised from infancy to be obsessed w the doctor and then falling in love w him. martha leaving bc she values herself enough to make that decision vs amy being treated like a piece of meat.

and this is simultaneously a great callback to when i said that moffats episodes during the rtd era sometimes had the same problems as his show running (bc girl in the fireplace reeks of this), and a great segue into the next grievance.

moffat hates women

he hates women so fucking much. g-d, does steven moffat ever hate women. holy shit, he hates women. especially normal human women who prioritize their normal human lives on an equal or higher level than the doctor. moffat hated rose bc she wasnt special by his standards. the empty child/the doctor dances is the nicest he ever treated her, and she really didnt do much in those eps beyond a fuck ton of flirting.

girl in the fireplace is another shining example of this. youve got rose (who once again has another man to keep her busy, bc moffat doesnt think shes good enough for the doctor) sidelined for no reason only to be saved by the doctor at the last second or whatever. and then youve got reinette, who is pretty and powerful and special!

its just. moffat thinks that the doctor is as shallow and selfish as he is. thats why he thinks the doctor would stay in one place with reinette and not with rose. bc moffat is shallow and sees himself in the doctor and doesnt think he should have to settle for someone boring and normal.

not to mention rose met the doctor as an adult and chose to stay with him whereas reinette is. hm. introduced to the doctor as a child and grows up obsessed with him.

does that sound familiar? it should! bc it is also true of amy and river. and all of them are treated as viable romantic pairings. bc the only women who deserve the doctor are the ones whose entire existence revolves around him. which includes clara as well.

genuinely i think that at least on some level, not even necessarily consciously, that bill was a lesbian in part bc capaldi was too old to appeal to mainstream shippers. like twelve/clara is still a thing but not as universally appealing as eleven/clara but i am just spitballing. but i think they weighed the pros and cons of appealing to the woke crowd over the het shippers and found that gay companion was more profitable. anyway the point is to segue into the next point, which is that moffat hates permanent consequences.

moffat hates permanent consequences

steven moffat does not know how to kill a character. honestly it feels like hes doing it on purpose after a certain point, like he knows he has this habit and hes trying to riff on it to meme his own shit, but it doesnt work. it isnt funny and it isnt harmless, its bad writing.

the end of the doctor dances is so poignant and so meaningful and so fucking good bc its just this once! everybody lives, just this once! and then he does p much the same thing in forest of the dead - this one i could forgive, bc i do think that preserving those peoples consciousnesses did something for the doctor as a character, it wasnt completely meaningless. but everything after that kinda was.

rory died so many times its like. get a hobby lol. amy died at least once iirc but it was all a dream or something. clara died and was erased from the doctors memory. river was in prison and also died. bill? died. all of them sugarcoated or undone or ignored by the narrative to the point of having effectively no impact on the story. the point of a major character death is that its supposed to have a point. and you could argue that a piece of art could be making a point with a pointless death, ie. to put perspective on it and remind you that bad shit just happens, but with moffat the underlying message is always “i can do whatever i want, nothing is permanent or has lasting impact ever.”

basically, with moffat, tragedy exists to be undone. and this was a really brilliant, really wonderful thing in the doctor dances specifically bc it was the doctor clearly having seen his fair share of tragedy that couldnt be helped, now looking on his One Win with pride and delight bc he doesnt get wins like this! and then moffat proceeded to give him the same win over and over and over and over. nobody is ever dead. nobody is ever unable to be saved. and if they are, really truly dead and/or gone, then thats okay bc moffat has decided that [insert mitigating factor here]*

*the mitigating factor is usually some sort of computerized database of souls.

i can hear the moffat stans falling over themselves to remind me that amy and rory definitely died, and they did - after a long and happy life together, they died of old age. i dont consider that a character death any more than any other character choosing to permanently leave the tardis.

and its not just character deaths either, its like, everything. the destruction of gallifrey? never mind lol! character development? scrapped! the same episode four times? lets give it a fifth try and hope nobody notices. bc he doesnt know how to not make the doctor either an omnipotent savior or a self-pitying failure.

it is in nature of doctor who, i believe, for the doctor to win most of the time. like, it wouldnt be a very good show if he didnt win most of the time. but it also wouldnt be a very good show if he won all of the time. my point is that moffats doctor wins too often, and when he doesnt win, it feels empty and hollow rather than genuinely humbling, and you know hes not gonna grow from it pretty much at all.

so like. again, i like all of doctor who i enjoy all of it very much. i just think that steven moffat is a bad show runner and a decent writer at times. and it is frustrating. and im not here to convince or convert anyone im just living my truth. thank you for listening.

[elderrolley]

thoughts from show number 13

if it’s too h-word blame @all-american-prophet for encouraging me

When Tom runs round and leans out from behind George pre-two by two, George looked down at him and smiled and waved hi 😭

Ryan as one of Kevin’s brothers ‘talking’ to Audibert by counting the travel pillows had me giggling

Tom dragging the glasses of George’s face is so funny I love-hate how much all the dad actors are ramping up their hatred for Arnold

Dom dancing a la Nic Rouleau in Hasa Diga is everything I’ve been waiting for

M-Jae dragging Dom away to hold the baby by his belt 😭😭😭 man corpsed

Rolley has nearly kissed Dom 3 times this evening what’s going on I’m so gay

He moved his hands down his body instead of holding them out to kiss him in turn it off??? let me blow u

Fuckin,,, forearm veins

im so gay he literally just called me a f4ggot

Tom looks progressively more scared as Rolley tells the Steve blade story,, homophobic Arnold era

he shouted ‘bam wham push it down’ and did a shoulder shimmy for push it down we love a camp king 💅🏻💅🏻

HE GIVES BEDROOM EYES SO HARD WHEN LEADING DOM like obvs stevie holds his hand too but bc he’s actually tall enough to make eye contact my god… mr rolley what if u held my hand like this… new bunda lengers CEO

Dom normally says ‘goodnight pal’ at the end of I am here for you but idk what happened, if he meant to say bud or whatever bc it just came out as ‘goodbye Ben’ and you saw him corpse

Rolley cocking his gay little leg up when Dom says to heck with rules lol f4g (affectionate)

Tom did the entire first half of Man Up up to when Dom enters with his trouser zip open funniest fucking thing I’ve ever seen

the interval was here but most of act 2 was spent being h-word so apologies for the lack of equal observation this is about rolley unless stated otherwise

his reactions in making things up… so camp omg stevie u might need to fight him

got picked out during hell dream my life is so fucking complete best day of my life dropping out of uni to be his footrest

DOMINUC??? LEANED IN FOR THE HELL DREAM KISS??

MY GOD HOW IS DOM DOING THE COME HERE HANDS INSTEAD OF STEPHEN UM

the was i in it is so camp stephen stop looking him up and down

when Stephen says they can leave Dom out of it and leads Tom across stage, he gave Dom such a gay bitchy look tonight purr 😻

white trousers bulge and white shirt veins return i have missed u

he looked disgusted when Jack said tribal woman w/o a bra that’s one thing I’ve always wanted stevie to do thank fuck

He was so touchy feely in pageant everyone say slay

Post pageant when they’re getting told off omg he fully looked like he was gonna burst into tears and the way he was shaking his head when Naba said they come from their sparkly lovely paradise had me writing a sad fic in my head in the middle of the show istg

Also I mostly just got a little hot at the end bc it sounded like he somehow optioned up in his little verse (also sorry to stevie but that little arm thing he does on his riff down is so him and not Connor I literally hate it)

Also took a picture of a certain slice of Mormon bundalicious cake so 💅🏻💅🏻

[wanderer-moonchild]

I reeeeally want to talk more about Diluc and Kaeya. 

I was waiting for the Hidden Strife event to see if we'd learn more about them, and even though we did, it didn't change my previous thoughts.

I'm excited to see what hyv has planned for them now that we know a lot about their past. They can focus on developing their characters in the present and I think they'll influence each other's development a lot. Here’s another long essay.

Diluc’s worldview change

Imo, Diluc's character development depends on him changing his worldview. I'm impressed with how much he's healed and matured over the years, but he’s still too focused on destroying evildoers, as he says. From his voice-overs and previous lines in quests, he’s borderline paranoid and feels like he needs to constantly watch his back.

So, what does his character need to grow?

I base my opinion solely on his miscellany video (lol), where Dainsleif says “if he were to face the same evil that I once did, would he still hold fast to his resolve?”. If that isn’t foreshadowing I don’t know what is.

Diluc now seems to be more focused on fighting the Abyss Order than the Fatui, and the Abyss Order is made of cursed people from Khaenri'ah. How will Diluc react when he learns the truth about them?

He's a righteous person, so I don't think he'd just shrug it off and be like ‘evil is evil’.

What would Diluc do if he learned that his enemies might not be as evil as he thought, and the gods are actually pretty shady? Would he continue to hold on to his values or would he begin to doubt himself or even the world he lives in? His internal conflict would make for a VERY interesting story.

I think that this confrontation of values might be triggered by Kaeya, especially by his supposed betrayal. 

The two of them get along considerably well, and Kaeya apparently is one of Diluc’s strongest bonds. It’s kind of sad, actually. He seems unable to develop strong relationships with others because he's too dedicated to his duty. His other relationships feel very professional in comparison to Kaeya’s.

But back to betrayal.

If Kaeya betrayed everyone, it would create a good conflict between them. Diluc would be angry and confused and would completely lose his trust in Kaeya for a while. But he'd probably reevaluate his beliefs and opinions about Kaeya once he learned the truth about Khaenri'ah. 

He'd go from being someone who sees evil everywhere (a mindset he developed after his father's death that still seems to be very present in him) to someone who understands that sometimes what seems to be a threat isn't a threat at all, and what appears to be harmless (the gods) is actually a threat.

Also, by understanding Kaeya’s motivations and forgiving him for his actions, they would be able to become close again, and the strongest bond in Diluc’s life would be saved.

I do think that Diluc and Kaeya will eventually fight each other again as a throwback to their first fight, but this time they’ll be on equal ground. And if Kaeya and Pierro actually have a connection... We'll get some high-quality angst!!!

Kaeya’s ‘betrayal’

Kaeya has a lot of things going on, but what does his character really needs story-wise? Mostly, to figure out which side he is on and to be accepted. 

So far, he was rejected simply for being who he is, and now he's wearing a mask to hide the real him. It would be wholesome to see everyone understanding that Kaeya lied about his identity bc he was in a difficult position. His character would finally receive the acceptance he needs. 

But I don’t think this will happen for two reasons. 

A) The threat he made to Venti in Windblume Festival. If he’s 100% on Mondstadt’s side, why would he threaten their archon? It’s not clear what Kaeya thinks about the gods, but threatening one definitely shows he is not as fond of them. Although he loves Mond, he still went out of his way to create an elaborate plan just to deliver a few ominous words to Venti.

B) His reaction to Crepus’ death.  Kaeya was surprised to see that even someone as good as him would use an evil power. He was all like “oh, how fascinating” lol So, what is stopping him, who is far from righteous, from doing the same thing?

Since Kaeya doesn't mind doing questionable things to achieve his goals and doesn't care what others think when he acts shady, it would be no problem for him to act like a villain to get what he wants.

I personally believe that Kaeya will "betray" Mond to protect the city and his loved ones. By ‘choosing Khaenri’ah’, he will be able to protect Mond and carry his clan’s plans, whatever they are. 

Besides, thanks to his confrontation with Diluc, Kaeya would probably think he deserves everyone’s resentment and anger. He might think ‘well, everyone will hate me when they find out the truth, so I might as well play the part’ and try to save Mond behind the scenes as he usually does.

Diluc, Jean and co. coming to accept him after his betrayal would be more meaningful bc they’d know his identity, his reasons and his dilemma with the divine and accept him anyway.

Diluc's acceptance would be especially important to him, of course. Kaeya would be able to accept himself wholeheartedly if the person he cares about the most accepts him as he is.

Anyway, these are guesses based on what we know so far. 

There are still many things that can happen to Kaeya’s character: Is he cursed? Does he know about the curse? Does he care? Will he have a face off with his father? Does he like the gods? Will he confront the gods? Will he be affected by the Fatui and the Abyss Order’s actions since he’s from Khaenri’ah? Can he abandon his duties without remorse when he knows that not only his clan but also his people who've turned into monsters will be affected?

Diluc’s character can be more involved with Fatui stuff. Even though he seems to have found closure through revenge, he's unlikely to stop tracking them down and wouldn't hesitate to stop any nefarious plans, so he might get in trouble a lot.