#moving to somewhere with a Jewish community will actually be possible

[thegreenmeridian]

My family’s stories about who we are and where we came from are a mess but a vague awareness of us being Jewish(ish) has always been there. I don’t know if I count as halachically Jewish - my family history on both sides is vague and muddled and there’s Jewishness smattered throughout, but from what I can tell the matrilineal line only goes back so far. London-Irish great grandma married a Jewish man. I think. Records on people from my socioeconomic background are vague and muddled too.

But I’ve always felt a connection to Judaism, always wanted to convert (or be affirmed, if it turns out conversion isn’t necessary). I’ve never done it. Either I’ve not lived near a Jewish community or I’ve not had the right frame of mind or whatever else. I’ve enquired. I think I was 17 when I first emailed a rabbi. But I’ve never done it.

And now, well, I live pretty much as far from a Jewish community as it’s possible to be. In a hippy town in rural Iceland where… well, there’s a lot of Palestinian flags around and enough dog whistles alongside them that I think being openly Jewish or believing the provable fact of Jewish indignity to the Levant or even just being anything less than rabidly anti Israel would be a major issue. My landlord’s daughter was talking about how my supermarket shouldn’t sell Lays crisps because they’re “linked with Israel”.

Iceland has a rabbi, a Chabad guy. Nice bloke, I’ve spoken to him a few times, on my last foray into maybe converting (but obviously, Chabad rabbis are maybe not the best choice for a transgender bloke covered in tattoos). And I spent my Christmas, ironically, with an Israeli Jew and his Icelandic husband. So there are Jews here, albeit barely enough for a Minyan. But still, not a community and definitely not a community here.

But… I’ve found Darshan Yeshiva. They’re an online community, an online conversion program, working with rabbis and cantors from a variety of denominations, and specifically targeted at people who don’t have proper access to a Jewish community. And when I’m done with my AS exams and I have a bit more spare cash, I’m doing it. I know online conversion is controversial, I do. But this is the route for me. And with the services and seminars held by the Chabad rabbi in Reykjavik, I won’t be entirely cut off from an offline community.

I’ve picked the worst possible time to commit to converting, I know. But I think part of why I’ve chosen now to finally do it, is that it’s such a bad time for it.

[matan4il]

TK Strand and Jewish Representation

A while ago, I made a post about Jewish rep. I wrote down my observations over the years on why most of it is currently not actually good. I wrote it before catching up on 911 LS's 3rd season. So everything I write here relates to the basic notions you can read about there.

OK, so TK starts out LS without a doubt in the "good" Jewish representation category: a Jewish character who's likable, we're rooting for him, we're invested in his life and love story with Carlos, and... he's barely Jewish. When I say barely, I mean we didn't even know during all of s1 that he is a Jew.

IDK if Marjan is considered good enough Muslim rep or not, but I’ll try to use the difference on the most basic of levels, in terms of the presence of her and TK’s identity to illustrate why I feel Jewish rep is so lacking: even visually, from the very first second, you can't miss that Marjan's a Muslim, she's wearing something that makes her Muslim identity present at all times. But it's more than that, she gets to talk about it, vocalize what it means to her, let us know what about it is positive. We see her being active about it in several different ways. She has storylines that are related to it, including showing her team's respect for her Muslim identity. Whatever else, there is no doubt that her Muslim identity is acknowledged and present.

TK could have worn a Star of David necklace. He could have mentioned, even once, being Jewish. He could have mentioned, even by passing, anything related to his Jewish upbringing, to meaningful memories that are connected to his Jewish heritage. But in s1, there was absolutely nothing. His Jewish identity has no presence whatsoever, meaning we didn’t even know he was Jewish. This stands out to me especially because s1 explicitly said, "We're all about diverse rep, baby!" The show took the time to painstakingly and on screen explain to us why diverse representation matters, and to showcase just how diverse its cast of characters is. And in all of that, it turns out one minority group was on our screen and completely unaddressed as such. Hell, there's even a scene in s1 where each one of the characters state to a bigot which minority she might hate them for being, and TK only mentions being "a homosexual," not being gay AND Jewish.

Now, I am taking into account that the show might have decided to turn TK Jewish later on, that maybe somewhere between the first and second sceasons they decided to incorporate Ronen Rubinstein's background into the character he's portraying. It's possible, and might explain the complete overlooking of a Jewish character in s1. But s2, when we find out that TK is Jewish, is still not offering us a marked improvement. Because remember, we don't find out that TK is Jewish from him. We find out that he's Jewish because his mother, Gwyn, makes a passing reference to herself being a Jew. Since Jewish identity is passed on through the mother, that means according to the Halakha (Jewish law), TK is Jewish, too. Yet it's still not present in his words, deeds or storylines in any way during s2.

More than that, being Jewish doesn't even seem to be that significant to Gwyn herself during that season. We see her making several life changing decisions during s2, yet her Jewish identity or values barely come into it. She only mentions her being a Jew as something to make her pause about moving to Texas (which begs the question why neither Owen nor TK consider how accepted TK might be as a Jew in Texas before moving him there, but that's going back to s1, so I'm putting that aside). But it's just a passing remark, it's not given any real weight, which could for example be her trying to see if she can find a Jewish community while living in Austin. We don't see her adding any Jewish items to the Strand household either, even as we spend a lot of time discussing some tension between her and Owen over what she brings with her. I'm just saying that despite us now knowing that we have two Jewish characters on the show, one of them a part of the main cast, s2 is still very much within the realm of "good" (meaning mostly missing) Jewish rep. These characters ARE Jewish, but minimally so.

I set out to watch s3 knowing that changes (thank you gifmakers and kind Nonnies who have sent me asks about it), that being Jewish is more present in this season, but I wondered to what a degree. Enough for me to feel that the show's Jewish rep has moved from "good" to (the very rare) actually good? I was hoping the answer would be yes.

It's not there, at least not yet. Yes, for the first time, being Jewish actually gets some presence on the show. We get to hear TK mumbling a part of the Kaddish! We get to hear Gwyn talking to him about his 'neshama' (the Hebrew word for soul). Not gonna lie, this really moved me. Even just to have Hebrew get some presence on the show! It's the ancient language of the Jews, the last of the Canaanite languages, preserved by Jewish people across time and space (even when it had to fall out of daily use through generations of Jews studying it and in it). Hebrew is amazing, the cultural wealth that can be accessed through Hebrew is amazing, so to get to have even a fraction of that present on the show was absolutely lovely.

I'm not sure how much I should go into inaccuracies. Those mostly made me wonder who contributed to the Jewish rep in s3, and how come they got some things really right, while others... I'll overlook most of it, and maybe address just the matter of Gwyn's funeral. It's mentioned that Jews bury their dead within 24 hours, which is inaccurate. Jews don't embalm, so bodies must be buried natural processes start taking their toll. That means basically to bury as soon as possible, and yes, most of the time that means within less than 24 hours. BUT a Jewish funeral can be postponed a little if there are unusual circumstances. Such as the deceased's son living in another state and there being doubt whether he can make the funeral in time if it doesn't get delayed by... let's say a day. That's a very likely delay under such circumstances. There's also the matter of the Kaddish, the prayer for the elation of the deceased's soul. The person who should have said it for Gwyn at her funeral was TK. It wasn't just important for him (on a personal level) to get there in time, it was also essential to one of the most significant parts of the Jewish funeral. It just made me sad we didn't get to see that, and that in a sense Jewish custom was present as "the villain" here, as being more rigid than it is in reality in order to... IDK, infuse a sense of urgency into TK and Owen's flight? If they wanted to separate them from Carlos, they could have still written the flight as being too full for them to have three tickets. It's fiction! They didn't need to make out Jewish tradition to be the "bad guy" here. And they also could have also still shown TK making it to the shiva'a (it's a bit like a wake, only it lasts for seven days, hence called "shiva'a" which is the Hebrew word for seven. First degree family members have to sit shiva'a for the deceased in that person's own home, and the community, family and friends will come visit them throughout the seven days of the shiva'a, sharing comforting words and memories. If you ask me, I think the custom of the shiva'a is really beautiful. It in a sense allows the world to "stop" when you've lost an important loved one, which is closer to how we internally feel at such times, even though we know the real world doesn't actually stop for our loss and grief. This custom makes room for this major change in our life and allows for a more gradual return to our normal routine afterwards. I think there's something really healing about it. I also think that by virtue of holding it for seven days, far more people can find a spare moment to come and pay the grieving family a visit, even if they couldn't make it to the funeral, which results in getting to hear a lot of stories about your loved one, and getting a much greater sense of having support from others. I know that I've been deeply grateful for this custom and in awe of it when I've sat shiva'a). Or at least the show could let us know that off screen, TK did sit shiva'a for his mom. It wouldn't take away from everything that transpired on the airplane as TK and Owen try to make it to Gwyn's funeral, and could have given a nicer closure to it, since they eventually fail to attend. I'm just saying, they didn't have to ignore actual Jewish tradition in order to achieve whatever they wanted to in terms of the drama.

But the major thing for me is that in s3, even as TK's Jewish identity gets more room, it's mainly through Gwyn. She's the one encouraging him to reconnect with his Jewish roots. She's the one showing how she handles life's challenges by going back to comforting Jewish ideas, such as his neshama being untainted despite his use of drugs. She's the one for whom Jewish custom matters enough that she must have asked in her will to be buried in a Jewish funeral. Will he heed her request? The way he was mumbling the Kaddish at the beginning of the season, when he was in danger and before his mom passed away, suggests he might. That it is a part of him that still exists, matters and comes out at crucial moments, even if he has neglected it for years. But will he actually do it? That remains to be seen. So I guess I'm saying that how good TK's Jewish rep will end up being overall, in spite of season 1 and 2, depends on how they'll handle it in the upcoming seasons. Will we see him try to find a Jewish community in Austin? Will his Jewish background be included in his wedding to Carlos? As the two of them build a life together and make choices for it, will TK being Jewish come into it in any way, even through small things like making Jewish food every once in a while, or celebrating Jewish holidays?

We'll see. I'm not very optimistic right now, but that might just be me and my disappointment with Jewish rep over the years. Let's hope 911 LS gives us enough to surprise me for the better!

Thank you so much if you've read all of this. Please don't hesitate to share your own thoughts! xoxox

[spacelazarwolf]

actually Im a reform jew, I just have common sense unlike the NUMEROUS goy anons who messaged you saying they were "converting" but havent talked to a rabbi yet. THATS NOT HOW CONVERTING WORKS IN JUDAISM

and that you didn't know that enough to tell them illustrates my whole point about all these tumblr kiddies just trying to piss off there parents

ok i have two different possible ways i could respond to this and i can't decide so i'm gonna do both.

option 1:

no one cares!!!!!!!!!!! get a hobby!!!!!!! stop shitting ur pants over what complete strangers on the internet are doing with their lives!!!!! eat a snickers and take a nap!!!!!!!

option 2:

none of the ppl who have sent me anons that have mentioned they haven't talked to a rabbi yet have called themselves jewish. there is no official step-by-step process of converting. for some people, it's a years or even decades long process, and part of that process is the time before they reached out to a rabbi. that time is full of self reflection and exploration, and that's a necessary step. you don't know why they haven't reached out to a rabbi yet. they could live in a rural area and be saving to move somewhere with a larger jewish community. they could be in an unsafe situation and waiting until they have the stability to start such an intense journey. like you literally know nothing about these people, and neither do i, so why the fuck is it any of our business??

anyway, you can shit ur pants over "tumblr kiddies" all u want but i'm going to continue to not project my own insecurities onto random people on the internet and instead choose to be a decent person and mind my own business.

[angstbotfic]

can we talk about how wild it is that this is appearing in mainstream US media? like, at the same time that the nation of Israel is on trial for doing exactly this, they're just openly admitting it everywhere and it's being published! it's not some obscure thing that there's plausible deniability about.

“We are occupying, deporting, and settling. Occupying, deporting, and settling. Did you hear that Bibi? Occupying, deporting, and settling.” “The general range goes from about 25% who want to re-establish permanent communities, Jewish Israeli communities in Gaza, to somewhere in the 40% range,” she told CNN of several polls conducted in November and December. “That is not a small portion of Israeli society.”

but particularly for this to be able to be in CNN is such a demonstration of how political common sense has changed on this issue:

Israel has “created the conditions whereby Gaza is no longer liveable,” she said. “Now they’re just simply repacking it as some sort of humanitarian gift, or humanitarian solution, when really what it is, is aiding Israel and ethnically cleansing Gaza of Palestinians.”

it doesn't do anything for all of the people already killed, wounded, displaced, and traumatized, nor those threatened with death from further bombing, starvation, and disease, of course. but this movement in culture is what might make it possible to get the Senate to actually approve investigating human rights abuses, say.

it has been really remarkable how much the terrain has shifted on this since October.

[ruffboijuliaburnsides]

Hi! Obviously ignore this if I'm asking something too personal, but you've mentioned that you're in the process of converting to judaism and I've been wondering how did you start? I've done a good bit of research and think it's something I'm interested in, but I have no idea what the actual process of conversion looks like, much less where to begin. Obviously feel free to ignore, or send me towards someone else, but thought I'd ask!

Hey no worries, anon! So, I will preface this by being forthcoming and saying I got partway through the conversion process, was forced to move, and ended up in a different part of the country with only one shul nearby whose rabbi (and community) are… very unfriendly to converts. They don’t SAY they are, but a few months of attendance and a handful of meetings with the rabbi with regards to conversion really hammered home that neither my wife nor I felt even remotely comfortable converting here, considering it’s a very personal and often vulnerable process, and wherein you have to actually like… trust and communicate with the rabbi you’re working with. So my conversion, while I still consider it “in progress”, is in an indefinite stall until we can move somewhere else or can reliably get to the next closest shul, which we currently cannot for various reasons.

ANYWAY. I started by doing a lot of research. Mostly I was just looking into… all kinds of religion, including Islam actually, because I missed the community and the structure and the spiritual anchors of my very conservative evangelical christian upbringing, but I didn’t like or want to return to the actual, y’know…. beliefs and tenets of Christianity. I found Judaism and just… the more I read and researched about the beliefs and the general culture of questioning and grappling with things within it, the more I felt like I’d found a people who I could understand, and a religion that understood me and would allow for me to be uncomfortable and question why things are taught certain ways and so forth. Which was one of many things that drove me away from Christianity, as I was not good at the whole “blind faith” thing. (they insist it’s not blind, but if you’re not supposed to question god then… what else IS it?)

At that point we were living in upstate new york, and the nearest reform shul was very small, did not have a permanent rabbi (there was one for a number of local communities that cycled around every few weeks), and really while they were officially reform they seemed to as a community have a practice and beliefs a lot closer to something like reconstructionist or humanist Judaism. I went to shabbat services on fridays there for a few months, and they were very nice but said they were very much not a usual reform congregation and that I should probably actually convert somewhere with a permanent rabbi and that was a bit more traditional, but that in the meantime they were more than happy to have me attend services and events with them. They were very sweet and I did appreciate that opportunity to accustom myself to the general pacing and content of a friday night shabbat service.

At that point we get to the part that you’re actually asking about, and I’m sorry if you’re just like “OH MY GOSH MAGS PLS JUST GET TO THE POINT” which is when we moved back down to Florida and I actually properly started the conversion process with a rabbi! I started out emailing the local shul and saying that I had just moved to the area, I was not Jewish but was interested in possibly converting and had been attending services at a very small shul up north, and is it all right if I attend a few shabbat services while I consider converting? I will say, I have never been told “no please don’t attend” about going to shabbat services, but especially with the world the way it is, and me being new and not knowing anyone in the community or having anyone to vouch for me, I prefer to ask beforehand so that they know to expect someone new who is reaching out and less likely to be a threat.

Anyway after a couple of weeks at that shul, I already loved the people and could tell I would get on pretty well with the rabbi, so I emailed her again about setting up a meeting to discuss converting. We had the meeting, talked about why I wanted to convert, what would be required of me, etc. She got me set up with a book list and some books from the shul library, gave me a reading assignment and asked me to write down any thoughts or questions I had, along with some other things that were kind of reading comprehension stuff, and told me to email her when I had finished so we could have another meeting. She also stipulated that she would have me live and practice through a full year of the Jewish calendar at minimum before she’d declare me ready to go to the mikvah, and we’d meet regularly, I’d do a lot of reading, I needed to attend a beginning hebrew class for adults that would be starting again over the summer, attend services (both weekly and holiday) as much as possible, and engage as much as possible in the community. (I really loved them. I was a soloist in the Purim spiel that year and I had friends and once I’d finished converting and could join the synagogue I’d already been needled to join their tiny choir and it was just a great group of people.)

Aaaand then we had to move due to things outside our control, and I couldn’t attend as often due to being a heck of a drive away (in a car with no A/C, in Florida, in the summer) so I tried to shift over to a closer shul whose rabbi my old rabbi knew, but it was High Holy Days and then he was travelling for some studies and couldn’t start doing anything like conversion until that was all over, and then we had to move again and now we’re here and have a very unfriendly rabbi and congregation, so we don’t attend services right now.

…………all this to say: you’ve done some research and you think you’re interested. Next step is to find the nearest shul that is of the movement you want to convert in, and call or email them and just let the rabbi know where you’re at and ask if you can attend some services respectfully to see if you still feel drawn to Judaism when engaging with it directly. If so, let the rabbi know, set up a meeting, and go from there. It’ll take time, a year at the LEAST and usually longer even if you DON’T have the sort of issues I’m currently having, but if HaShem is calling you home, it’s worth it.

(and if your rabbi requires to you take any classes or what-not, most organizations that run them that require you to pay some kind of fee offer scholarships or reduced tuition if you’re not financially able to enroll in them initially, so be sure to reach out about stuff like that, too.)

[icannotreadcursive]

So we all know JKR is a moron, and one of the places that shows is in the official Wizarding Schools list. Mostly because there are way too few of them

There are officially 11 of them, and we know 8: 3 in Europe (one of which is in the British Isles), 1 in Russia, 1 in Japan, 1 in Africa, 1 in South America, and 1 in North America. That's a ridiculously tiny number, and almost all of them cover ranges that are ridiculously huge and with such diverse cultures and magical traditions within their range. So let's run through what I consider a sensible distribution of wizarding schools.

Starting with the British Isles, we know we have Hogwarts in Scotland.  There would also be one in Ireland—because of the way Irish history has gone, this school likely would have taken a side in the Troubles and therefore be, at least unofficially, either very Catholic or very Protestant. Irish wizarding kids whose families are religiously opposite to the school, or not particularly religious, may then choose to go to Hogwarts instead to avoid conflict. I think there used to beother schools—1 in Wales, and as many as 3 in England, 1 in or near London, and 1 each associated with Cambridge and Oxford universities. The Cambridge and Oxford schools I think would have evolved over time into magic colleges, because I do not believe for a second that there is no such thing as post-secondary wizarding education. The London school can't still exist and have it still make sense that all our Hogwarts friends end up at Hogwarts—if it's a fancy private school, Draco is there not at Hogwarts; if it's a public school Hermione and all the Weasleys are there, not at Hogwarts, and so on. I'm not sure exactly why or when I think it closed, but sometime before the 1990s, probably before the 1950s, Hogwarts absorbed the London school's student pool. The Welsh school I think was a victim of the English destruction of Welsh culture. If it still exists, or has been rebuilt, I think it's very small and teaches at least partially in Welsh.

Moving on to the rest of Europe. We know we have Beauxbatons in France, and I buy that. Then we have Durmstrang, which is allegedly in Scandinavia. “Durmstrang” doesn't sound Scandinavian to me, it sounds German, because it is German. It's obviously derived from the German phrase “Sturm und Drang” which means “storm and stress,” so I feel like Durmstrang must be somewhere that is or has been German-speaking.  I'm inclined to put it in Poland in one of the areas that used to be in Prussia, possibly near Danzig. Durmstrang would then serve most everywhere that has ever been part of that which is now Germany, so most of the middle of Europe.

I do think there is also at least 1 school in Scandinavia. And there's going to be 1 in Spain, 1 it Italy—specifically Rome—and 1 in the south-east of Europe, probably Romania or Bulgaria.

That brings us up to a total of 8 major magic schools in Europe, 2 of them in the British Isles, not counting any magic colleges.

You may note I sort of left out most of Eastern Europe. That's because I think there's probably a school somewhere between Moscow, and Minsk in Belarus that serves Eastern Europe and Western Russia. That is still a very large geographical range, but a lot of that area is quite sparsely populated so I think it works out, especially if we expect that there are smaller, more local schools and/or homeschooling coalitions going on. We'll say this is Koldovstoretz, the canon Russian school. But also, Russia is freaking enormous, there's no way there's only one magic school in all of Russia. I think there must be ant least 1 more, out east, but probably there's 2, one out east and one more toward the middle, possibly near Krasnoyarsk.

I'm willing to believe that there is 1 major magic school in Japan, and that's the canon Mahoutokoro School of Magic. That cannot be the only school in Asia.

There has to be 1 in China. Now, despite China's size, I'm actually okay with the idea of there only being 1 major official magic school. China has a long history of centralizing government and education and its vast bureaucracy. I can see there being one school that's been there since, like, the 800s AD. If there is only the one official school, though, there will also be smaller local less prestigious schools, and again homeschooling.

There's definitely at least 1 in India. Mongolia and Kazakhstan are both traditionally nomadic enough that I expect magic is taught much more on a familial, elder-to-child basis without any large centralized schools. I feel like there would be 1 in Korea, because while Korea is relatively small, it is culturally very distinct from both China and Japan and has historically made a point of maintaining that distinction, so I don't think they'd be sending their wizarding kids to either of the neighboring magic schools.

I am going to very conservatively say there's 1 on the Indochinese Peninsula.

That gives us 5 in Asia. With the 8 in Europe and 3 in Russia, we're already at 16 major magic schools.

There's at least 4 in the middle east: 1 in Turkey, 1 in Iran, 1 in Saudi Arabia, and 1 in the vicinity of Israel that focuses on Judaic magic tradition. Exactly where that one is—whether it's within the modern state of Israel or not—is going to depend pretty significantly on how old it is, whether it's born of Jewish cultural revival and reclamation or if it's ancient. It's quite likely there would be more schools than this, it's a large region with longstanding emphasis on education, but let's just go with these 4.

We're at 20 schools.

Africa. Canon gives us Uagadou School of Magic in Uganda. The idea that there is only 1 school to serve the entire African continent is insane. And I don't think there's any way around the fact that it derives from the colonialist and racist idea that Africa and African people are uncivilized and uneducated.

In North Africa, I'm saying there's at least 2: 1 in Morocco, and 1 in Egypt. Because of regional histories, there's definitely 1 in Ethiopia and definitely 1 in Zimbabwe. I expect at least 1 in Western Africa, probably Nigeria. I was thinking that is there's 1 in South Africa (the country specifically, not the region of Southern Africa) there'd be 2, one white one black, because of Apartheid, but on second thought I highly suspect that until quite recently, most or all white wizarding kids in South Africa would have been sent to Durmstrang or Hogwarts, depending on their parents' backgrounds and socialaspirations, so I'm not sure what magic schools there might be in Southern Africa other than the one in Zimbabwe.

This puts us at (a minimum of) 6 schools in Africa, 26 worldwide.

Hopping the Atlantic to North America where it's just as ridiculous to think there's 1 school for the entire damn continent. There's going to be at least 8 in the U.S. alone. An old affluent white one up east that looks a whole lot like its European cousins (that's Ilvermorny), 2 in the south (one that started off whites only, one historically black), 2 in the midwest (again, one white one black), 1 in California, 1 that at least used to be girls only (this one is probably also East Coast), and 1 that focuses on Native magic traditions that's either west/midwest or in or near the Qualla Boundary in North Carolina.

There's at least 3 in Canada: an English speaking one probably east of middle, an English speaking one in the west that probably also gets kids from Alaska, and a French speaking one in Quebec.

I'm thinking another 3 in Mexico and Mesoamerica, one of which was or is closely tied to the school in Spain, and all 3 of which teach different, even conflicting, magical traditions.

We're at 40 schools worldwide.

In South America, we know we have Castelobruxo in Brazil, which allegedly serves all of South America, but that's also stupid, in no small part because Brazil speaks a different language from the entire rest of the continent. So that gives us bare minimun 2 schools: Portuguese speaking Castelobruxo, and another Spanish speaking school. I'm gonna say there's actually 2 Spanish speaking schools, for a total of 3.

Finally, Australia's gotta have 1.

So, using my numbers, which I fully recognize leave out a lot of places and still give most of these schools impractically large ranges, even taking into account home schooling and community-based education, we get 44 Wizarding schools. That's four times the official number.

Like, wtf.

[nimblermortal]

I READ GOOD FANFIC AND NOW I WANNA WRITE THE GOLD GUARD.

Also I’m just really chatty tonight.

Immortals who are not in fact warriors before they die, and maybe not after. Casual references to Jewish immortals who will not be appearing in this story. The chance to kill Jeff Bezos in fiction for no reason (except, in-story, the possible character development of Our Brother, but if we kill him for no good end that’s all right too).

Ancient lesbians. Ancient lesbians being pillars of their community. Ancient lesbians who had to go through a phase of "I know I am several hundred years older than you but I am sexually and romantically interested in you and that's kind of awkward"

and also "I am not comfortable being attracted to the statuesque Amazon who is hundreds of years older than me and could kill me in more ways than I can imagine"

Enkidu. Enkidu who refuses to admit whether he was Enkidu or Gilgamesh in the original story. Enkidu the brother, who sees himself or his lover in Egil, and is willing and able to wait as long as necessary for Egil to become human. Enkidu the activist, who will gladly kill Jeff Bezos for his brother but also for his activism, and who is aware that as satisfying as it is to kill the ultracapitalist it will not actually make a difference to the capitalist system. Enkidu the father, raising children because kids are great, who has had some 300 opportunities to be a parent and is still learning, because every child is different and doesn’t it take 10,000 tries to become good at something anyway?

Egil, struggling to be human, to understand what it is to be human, even a thousand years later, the societal goalposts constantly moving faster than he can keep up. Egil who has his brother’s weregild locked away somewhere. Egil who probably died a natural death of old age, the only one of them to do so, and who is still the most violent. Egil trying to find his humanity among dark web trolls, and yet for all that, his gift of poetry has immortalized him more than any miracle.

[starsgivemehp]

The Argument Against and Defense of Hetalia

Let me preface this by saying that I have not watched the show or read the manga in a few years now, and thus I am working mostly off of memory and what fan content I see these days, which is not a lot. Also, I am a gentile, and I don’t claim to know a lot about the Jewish community or traditions. I am, however, a writer and I have plenty of practice analyzing and criticizing works of fiction from multiple angles. With that in mind, this essay is an attempt to explain everything that is wrong and not wrong with the show, the comic strips, and the fandom.

I’m putting this under a read more for sheer length, this was 11 pages on Google docs.

Let us start with the list of grievances assembled largely from one post, the majority of which I had to go digging for as the original person in this post who mentioned Hetalia said, and I quote, “i dont feel the need to link a source for [hetalia] because…” and then listed two things, one of which is incorrect entirely. But I digress, I will address each one at a time. The list of grievances is as follows:

It is called ‘Axis Powers’ Hetalia

One of the main characters is a personification of Nazi Germany

The entire point of the series is:

Advocating for eugenics

Racial fetishization

Advocating for fascism

Nazi sympathizing/propaganda

The entire franchise is terrible due to rape jokes, racism, and Holocaust jokes

Hetalia fans are all terrible due to rape jokes and other issues

Death of the author cannot apply to this fandom

There may be more that are in other reblogs of the post in question, and I may add addendums further in this essay, but for the time being, I will address each of these grievances and explain the validity or non-validity of each, from a position understanding of both fans and of non-fans. Thus, in order:

‘Axis Powers’ Hetalia

When people talk about Hetalia, they usually are referring to the anime due to its widespread popularity. However, Hetalia began as a series of strip comics posted on a forum by Hidekaz Himaruya (and I spent a while trying to actually find the original comics, but I can’t, there are links to his blogs there in what I’ve provided). It later was formatted into a manga, and then later became an anime. While it was originally titled Axis Powers: Hetalia and the first two seasons of the show are named as such, it usually is only referred to as Hetalia. The anime seasons after said first two seasons have all been ‘world’ focused: Seasons three and four were titled World Series, season five was titled Beautiful World, season six was titled World Twinkle, and the upcoming season seven is titled World Stars.

For the purposes of tagging everything, I tend to see the tags ‘hetalia’ and ‘hws,’ which is short for Hetalia: World Series. This name of the third and fourth anime seasons is the most widely accepted and used name for the series as a whole. While it is true that, years ago, people referred to it as ‘aph’ for Axis Powers Hetalia, the fans and the series have put that behind them, for good reason. It is understandable, even righteous, to not accept the title ‘Axis Powers.’ It does draw focus to the WW2 era, and place the fascists and nazis as the ‘main characters,’ or even, ‘the good guys,’ which is not the case. Obviously, the Nazis were terrible and the entirety of the Axis Powers did horrible, unspeakable things during the war.

It must be noted, to anybody who has not seen the show or read the manga, that the first one to two seasons do have a ‘focus’ on the WW2 era, per se, but it largely talks about interactions between countries, as they are the personified party, and makes extremely few allusions to the war itself, and none to the Holocaust. I will address that in a later section. For now, the point to make is that after these original two seasons, Hetalia branches out into a much wider worldview, adds several more characters, and focuses more on said characters in individual arcs and offerings of historical facts - as generalized as they may be. Nobody claimed that Hetalia was correct in everything it said, but it aims to play out some historical information in a simplified and humorous way. This is due to the fact that the characters are all singular people meant to personify entire countries, which leads us to point two.

The Personification of Nazi Germany

This is the second complaint of the strand of the post in question that I was presented with, quoted as “one of the main characters is a personification of nazi germany.” This is an entirely incorrect statement. ‘Nazi Germany,’ as people call it, is the state of Germany during the era leading up to and of World War 2. The country is still Germany, the people were still German, the Nazi part comes from the political regime in power, a real world nightmare. In the Hetalia series, the characters are called by their country names, because that is who they personify. This may change at times. For example, the character now known as Turkey was previously called Ottoman Empire. They come to be when civilization starts or a colony is introduced to a place. This can be seen in the strip or episode where China ‘finds’ Japan as a small boy and begins to teach him reading and writing - and Japan thereafter invents hiragana. It can also be seen in the comic where a young child, Iceland, questions who he is and why he knows his people are “different beings” than him. The country that speaks to him (I only have the comic here in my likes in that list, the name isn’t mentioned and it’s been a while, but it might be another of the Scandinavian countries) explains that he is Mr. Iceland, they don’t know why he is Mr. Iceland, but they know he is.

What I am attempting to explain with all of these other examples is that there is no ‘Nazi Germany’ character. There is a character called Germany (or Mr. Germany), and all of his adult life, he has been called Germany. He is never addressed by anything else. He does, however, look remarkably similar to a childhood friend of Italy’s, Holy Roman Empire (or just Holy Rome), but as far as it has been explained in canon, Holy Rome went off somewhere and, later on Germany and Italy met as strangers. The general consensus is, due to the area where the Holy Roman Empire used to be is around-ish Germany, the characters are the same. But never, in any of the comics, anime, or movie, is Germany referred to as Nazi Germany. I don’t believe the word ‘Nazi’ appears at any point in time, even, though I cannot claim I have seen every shred of content, so I may be wrong. But I doubt that very much, as it is not in the nature of the series to do such a thing. Moving on.

Advocating for Eugenics

I will start and end this section by saying that Hetalia was, in the original post, roped in with Attack on Titan, of which (as far as I know) the author advocates for eugenics - or the idea that certain people should not be allowed to produce offspring due to their race or other factors. There is no example of Hetalia content wherein this disgusting opinion is ever mentioned or supported in any way. This is at worst a flat-out lie, and at best lumping Hetalia in with a much worse show that does do this (but I won’t get into that, I have never seen more than a few episodes of Attack on Titan and I don’t care to see any more of it. Throw your opinions or defenses elsewhere, I care 0% about it entirely). I have no more need to prepare a more detailed response to this accusation. It simply is not true.

Racial Fetishization

This particular accusation is a difficult one. Fetishization may be a strong word, as the series is largely a comedy. Everyone gets their turn in the spotlight, so to speak, so I find it hard to plainly state that any one character is fetishized or displayed as the most powerful. There is, of course, Rome, who only appears in small segments as Italy’s grandfather and is, in the series, touted as an amazing empire who had it all. I do not believe this is what the accusation is referring to. This accusation seems to be some sort of insistence that the show and creator believe that white people (or possibly just Germans/Nazis/the Aryan race?) are touted as the most powerful and nobody else can compare. I can confidently say that while that is never said anywhere, there are a few issues. Hetalia, particularly the animated series, had (and may still have) a longstanding issue of whitewashing countries that should not be white. This includes Egypt and Seychelles (who both later got a darker skin tone, probably still not dark enough though) as the worst offenders, and even Spain, Turkey, Greece, and Romano (southern Italy), and so on. Yes, this is a big problem. There is no defense against that. It should not be the case. These characters obviously should have darker skin. I will note, however, that many fans are already completely aware of this, have been complaining about it since the beginning, and tend to draw these characters with more correct skin tones in their fanart. This is a case where yes, the original content is not good, but the fans make their own fixes. If you are angry at Hetalia for whitewashing, good. You should be. But I do not believe this should reflect on the entirety of the content and the fandom (And note that I am not linking any particular fanart here, because I want nobody to go attack any fans).

It is also important to note that yes, a large majority of the series builds upon stereotypes. No, stereotypes are not good. No, you should not assume that the personifications of the countries encompass all citizens of said countries. The entire premise of the show is one person = the embodiment of a country, and that person changes and adapts with the times in terms of uniform and personality. It is extremely hard to do this without stereotyping. Most serious fans are aware of this, and do not in any way believe that these characters represent everyone from these countries. It may be true that much younger fans used to, and it may be true that people do not want to watch the show because stereotypes are, arguably, bad. But do remember that this is a comedy, and every character is picked on. Every one. And it is understandable if this branch of humor is not for you. I, personally, don’t like Family Guy or South Park or any shows like that for their humor. I also don’t attack the people who do. I ignore it.

Advocating for Fascism

This is another area wherein I believe the accuser is simply lumping Hetalia in with the original poster’s subject, Attack on Titan. Again, I will not defend or attack that show, as I do not care about it at all. However, regarding Hetalia, I can confidently say that it does not advocate for fascism. While the first two seasons are (sort of) set in WW2 era, as previously mentioned, the fighting is not really a big part, and nobody is touted as correct - only struggling in the conflict. For example, there is a scene where Germany, post WW1, is shown making cuckoo clocks by hand and lamenting the fact that he has to make so many thousands in order to pay back France. This is by no means painting fascism as a good thing, or explaining anything about how poverty and other struggles lead to the formation and rise of the Nazi party. It is simply a scene where we see a man frustratedly making cuckoo clocks and complaining while France’s big head jeers at him in his imagination. The surrounding scenes and the end of this one are making note of how Italy keeps coming over to his house to try and be friends and Germany keeps kicking him out because Italy is annoying and whiny. The episode further goes on to mention that Germany is attacking France again, and Italy has suddenly become his ally, and he is not happy about it for the aforementioned reasons. Again, this does not in any way paint Germany as being ‘right.’ The purpose of the segment(s) is/are to show him disliking the annoying Italy (whom the show is named for) and trying to get him out of his house before eventually giving up and accepting that they can be friends. Is it all 100% historically accurate? No, not by a long shot. Does it paint him as sympathetic? Sort of, you feel bad for the guy making a thousand cuckoo clocks, but only in the sense that he is one person doing a lot of work, a completely fictional situation. But Italy - and the audience - obviously know that attacking France again is not a good thing, so does it advocate the Nazis or fascism? Also no.

Nazi Sympathizing/Propaganda

I pretty well covered this in the previous section, but I will expand. I have alluded to the first two seasons as “focusing” on WW2, in a way, and also mentioned that this is a generalization of sorts, so here I will attempt to clarify. The first few episodes do, indeed, touch on ‘the way they all met’ in a sense; Germany is starting a war and he reluctantly becomes allies with Italy, and less reluctantly becomes allies with Japan, who examines both of them and decides he is content with this situation. However, none of it is very serious, and these ‘formalities’ give way easily to more humorous personable interactions, such as Italy hugging Japan without warning and the touch-anxious Japan pushing him off and getting flustered, Italy petting a cat and then freaking out when he is licked because a cat’s tongue is rough, the two of them ‘training’ by doing your regular old exercising and jogging and Italy being late, etc etc. Stupid, personable jokes.

On the flip side, the show covers the Allied Powers quite a bit too. A lot of this is the five big ones - America, Britain (/England/UK), France, Russia, and China - all meeting around one table and squabbling about various things. I fondly recall one scene where China arrives late and has a bunch of workers suddenly building a Chinatown in the meeting room because he was hungry and wanted his own food, and the others protesting. They are then offered food and become okay with it, because food. Other such nonsense plays out in other, similar meetings. There is also a segment where the Axis powers are all stranded on an island for… some unknown reason… and they set about attempting to survive via campfire and fishing and such. Twice (three times?) the Allied powers ‘attack’ them on this island via China whacking them each with a wok and, as the three of them are in a sad heap, something interrupts the scene to make the Allies retreat. One time, it is Rome’s sudden and also unexplained entrance across the sky singing a song, and another time, it is England’s preoccupation with a cursed chair. Also, at one point, Austria is playing a piano. Does any of this magic logical, real life sense? No. It’s stupid and funny and has nothing to do with war. These are just personable characters thrown into weird situations so they can be funny, with some extremely mild historical context along the way.

I will note again that WW2 is pretty much completely dropped after these two seasons, with the war hardly addressed at all, and future seasons focus more on other characters. The Scandinavians get to all have fun together, the Baltic trio is mentioned, there is a lot about Switzerland taking care of Liechtenstein (wow I spelled it right after all these years, go me) and being stiff and formal with Austria. There is also plenty about people mistaking Canada for America, and England and France squabbling throughout the years, and Spain finding Romano cute but also very grumpy, etc etc… This series is largely Eurasia-focused, yes, and it can be criticized for not being as diverse as it should be. But boiling it down to ‘Nazi propaganda’ is outright, obliviously false.

I don’t know if this is the best place to put this particular note, but I couldn’t think of anywhere else to place it, so here it will go. I would like to mention that in the series, some characters, like Germany and Russia, express outright fear of their ‘bosses’ in certain points in history. It is important to realize that Germany, Japan, America, etc… these characters are not the actual, real-life humans in charge of these countries, but people of a fictional, separate species than humans who grow up as the nation grows and have lives that are affected by these world leaders (we even watch in the show America shooting up from child to young adult as the colonies expand, and England comments on how quickly he grew up - but not as quickly as his people, of course. We’ll get to Davie later). The president of the United States is America’s ‘boss,’ and naturally, that boss changes every time the president changes. The emperor of China is China’s ‘boss.’ It follows, thusly, that at one point, Hitler was Germany’s ‘boss.’ The terrible person himself was alluded to, as far as I know, exactly one time, not by name, and no face was shown. In a very brief scene, Germany laments that his new boss is scary and he was just ordered to go force Austria to come live with him. Said boss is shown as, I believe, an evilly laughing shadowy figure. That’s it. That’s the scene. There is no other mention of Hitler, nor is there any mention of the Holocaust anywhere. One could argue that the show is then trying to say that the Holocaust didn’t happen, but I think such an accusation is frankly absurd. It’s a comedy, it was always a comedy, and what in the fuck would be comedic about a mass genocide in any way? Nothing. None of it is funny. Of course it is not brought up in a comedy.

Rape Jokes, Racism, and Holocaust Jokes

While I did somewhat address racism already in the section about whitewashing and racial fetishization, I have another clarification to make, especially regarding the jokes. A lot of people complain that there are rape jokes throughout the series, and that there are two Holocaust jokes. I will begin by saying yes, this is all true, those things did happen during the course of the show. However, it is important to note that all of those things happened in the English dub of the animated show, and none of these terrible jokes exist in the Japanese/subbed version, or the original comic strips.

The English dub is, on all accounts, pretty terrible. Everyone has an over exaggerated accent, there are the aforementioned jokes, there are name changes (England referred to as Britain, among them, very confusing), and the voice actors themselves make mention in commentaries that their goal in this job was, to paraphrase because I haven’t listened in a while, ‘to be as offensive as possible to absolutely everyone’ (and one of the English dub voice actors is even a convicted sex offender, but that’s it’s own mess).  Not the most glamorous or noble of goals. One could say ‘at least if it’s everyone, it’s not really racism, is it? Just humor?’ There is a case for that. Many comedians will say that they poke fun at everyone to avoid singling anybody out as inherently superior. It cannot be said to be the best way to make humor, but it cannot be said to be the worst way, also. Overall, I don’t like the English dub, I don’t watch it, I prefer the subs. And yes, the subbed version has a few issues of its own, but I can say that at least, no, it does not make any Holocaust or rape jokes. Are those kinds of jokes excusable? Fuck no. They’re completely inappropriate. Should you judge the whole series and fandom based on the grossness of the English dubs? Also no, the people who did the English dubs have zero to do with the original creator, the animators, and the fans. Screw them.

The Fandom Being Terrible

I must again preface by saying I was never super active in the fandom at large. I had my own little niche of friends and I stuck to them and I didn’t often branch out. I did, however, go to cons back in those days, and saw plenty of cosplayers. The main complaint I see regarding the fandom is that most of the fans are completely rabid, make a bunch of rape jokes, and even dress up as ‘Nazi Germany’ (iron cross and red armband and all) and pretend to shoot up synagogues. Now, I have not seen cosplayers do the nazi solute or do such photoshoots, but I can believe that people have done it. I have seen plenty of rabid fans, and some of the OCs created for Hetalia, especially many interpretations of individual states (or Antarctica), were extremely cringey, racist, and overall just not good. And yes, these things are undeniably bad. They are very bad things! Those people should be ashamed. They should know better, regardless of their ages or anything, for fuck’s sake. The nazi salute is not a thing you do jokingly, pretending to shoot people is not a joke. Everyone is aware of this. The people who did, or maybe even still do, those things need a serious sit-down and to be woken the fuck up, because they are acting terrible.

However, it is extremely unfair to paint all Hetalia fans in the same light. That is a very stereotypical thing to do, no? As I mentioned earlier, I stuck to my little niche friend group of fans, and while we all had our own flaws and were younger and kinda dumber, we never did things like that. I never did things like that. Rape jokes were never funny, I never liked them, I never accepted them. I have people I still know who still like Hetalia and they never made those kinds of jokes either. I think, as the years have gone by, a lot of the more rabid fans have died out of the fandom. They’ve either grown the fuck up or they’ve went off to pollute some other fandom. Recognize that, especially in the beginning, the anime was low-budget and had a lot of that old and gross queerbaiting and stuff like that, so it was undeniably a magnet for crazy yaoi fans. But the majority of fanart, fanfics, and just overall fan stuff that I see these days are nothing like that. Overall, the fandom has seriously calmed down. A lot of the focus is much more on taking these characters and applying them to other historical events with more accuracy than the show might give. The history in these fanfics and fanarts may also be of questionable accuracy at times. I personally once wrote a fic where I made allusions to the death of Joan d’Arc and, later, the death of Elizabeth I, but did I add much historic fact? No, do I look like a history major spilling all this? The point of the fic was England - the character - maturing through starting to love one of his rulers and recognizing a terrible thing that he did before. It’s not the best piece of work out there, and maybe someone could point out a few things I did wrong with it, but for what it’s meant to be, it’s harmless. Takes on characters not actually in the series, like Ireland, Scotland, etc etc are generally pretty mature from what I see, fanart tends to just be the characters in various poses and styles. The overall love the fandom has, I think, is in the better character designs and in the very concept of the countries as people who laugh and cry and live through war and peace for thousands of years. And here is where I address the final grievance that I personally saw in the notes of the post which started this whole thought process and essay.

The Death of the Author

A lot of people might not fully understand what ‘The Death of the Author’ means. The death of the author is a belief rooted in the 20th century that the personal intentions, beliefs, and prejudices of the authors of certain works can have no bearing on their produced content, because once it is out in the public, every reader may then have their own interpretation and belief system. By publicizing the content, the author ‘dies’ and the reader is born.

There are some scenarios where this cannot apply. One example is JK Rowling, a very special case of a very problematic woman who happens to be so powerful, and so rich, that consuming any type of official (or even unofficial) Harry Potter anything can and will give her that much more power to spread her TERF bullshit. Let me be frank: Any time that consuming a product is allowing a bigoted or problematic person to gain extra money or extra power that they then use for evil, the death of the author cannot apply. You cannot use it as a moral justification. You might perhaps use it as the reason why you struggle to let go of a fandom near and dear to you, as Harry Potter is to so many people, but you absolutely must recognize that purchasing the books, the movies, or any other official content is outright supporting a TERF.

That in mind, there are dozens of other cases where the death of the author absolutely can apply. The easiest, of course, is with authors who are actually dead, such as Lovecraft. Lovecraft was a complete bigot and racist, an overall terrible person, and his works are saturated in that racism. But he is dead, and his work is very popular, and there are ways to take and use his work that do not contribute further to racism and bigotry. All you have to do is slap a non-racist cthulhu on a page. Make that cthulhu eat everyone equally. That’s a good cthulhu right there, a nice, safe cthulhu.

So where does Hetalia fall in this spectrum of can or cannot have death of the author? I believe it leans more to the side of yes, you can apply it. For one thing, you can definitely find the show for free in some places, and watch it without giving Himaruya a single cent. The comics are also available online for free, and while you might be giving your ‘support’ by being a viewer, I think overall, that’s not only negligible, but does not contribute anything bad? The author of Attack on Titan has many charges levied against him in the post which prompted this, and arguably, giving him any money is bad. But as far as I have seen, while Himaruya might have started out with a flawed premise and may have some whitewashing issues, I have seen nowhere that he funds any kind of racist, nationalistic, fascist, etc anything of any kind. This is not like Chick-Fil-A, where offering any kind of patronage is (or maybe used to be) sinking funds into terrible organizations. This is not supporting literal Nazis, as the complaints claim. This is a largely mediocre series with good parts and bad parts and zero ties to horrific organizations or ideals. Consuming good fan content does not make someone a racist or a bigot or a nazi sympathizer. Even rewatching some old favorite scenes or checking out the new season doesn’t make someone that. By all accounts, the show is flawed but not a means to fund nazis.

The Bad Anything Else

I will now take some time to talk about some other problems Hetalia has, because no, it is by no means flawless. I already discussed the whitewashing and stereotypes and the mess of the English dub, but there is more. I made mention of the fact that battles and seriously bad events such as the Holocaust are not mentioned, and this holds true throughout pretty much all of the series. There are certain points where ‘battles’ of a sort are seen, but only flash moments. One scene in particular that I really enjoyed as a tween and can now see the problems with is the whole revolutionary war scene. This was a scene split into two episodes (for some weird reason, even an unrelated episode in between, like, what? Why??) about a particular (unnamed) battle in the American Revolution where England faced down America, they each had a gun with a bayonet, and England charged America and his bayonet deeply scratched America’s gun, and America declared he was no longer England’s little brother, and the whole thing was played out as an extremely emotional scene. England is lost in the past of seeing America as a cute little kid he took care of, who has now grown up and is being reckless and stupid, and America is all righteous and independent and proving he’s a grown up, it’s all very emotional, I cried, other fans cried, there was much fanart.

This scene is problematic in a way. Boiling down an extremely nasty conflict following lots of really bad laws and protests to this one scene doesn’t do history any justice. It says nothing about the struggles of the American colonists, the struggles of the British empire, the awful things the colonists did to the natives, etc etc. It is one small scene and it focuses on these characters as humanoid, with feelings, and completely ignores the complexities of history. And yes, in a way, that is bad. But it is bad in the sense that nobody can - or at least should - take this show to be the end-all be-all of history. It is not. It is not often entirely correct, and it picks and chooses what points in the past several thousand years to play with, and trying to use it as a map for history is a bad idea. However, this focus on the countries as human-like and struggling can also be a good thing.

It is also important to note that there have been other problems. The portrayal of South Korea, for example, is extremely controversial, and while I do not know all of the specifics, I believe that it was banned in Korea due to this, and the character was entirely removed from the anime, among other things. Obviously, a bad take, a bad character. There are also just straight up not great characterizations in certain cases. I don’t, for example, like anything about how Belarus is portrayed as a crazy psycho constantly begging Russia (her big brother) to marry her? I think that that is ridiculous, and I know nothing about Belarus as a country but I am pretty darn sure that that is not how one ought to go about portraying the country. There are a few other examples, but my purpose here was not to pull up a list of every country and explain what is correct or incorrect about each characterization. It is enough to say that some characters were not portrayed perfectly. But with that in mind...

The Good Anything Else

It is the most important to remember that this, all of this, is fiction. This is a silly, silly fantasy series. The countries are not humans, they are some weird semi-immortal species that share a universal language and know they are not human and are referenced by humans as ‘those people.’ They are fictional constructs. But the good out of all of this is that they explore human emotions. The American Revolution scene should not be taken as how the revolution was, and who might have been right or wrong. But it is a very emotional story of a big brother unable to accept that his little brother has grown up and wants to make his own choices. That, right there, is a heartfelt scene that I’m sure plenty of real people can feel something about. And there are plenty of other scenes that really grab you by the heartstrings, especially given how crazy, stupid, and humor-oriented the rest of the show is. And I will take a moment and enthuse about some of the more popular scenes that I think are, in fact, pretty good.

There is one episode in season 5, Beautiful World, where an American woman visits France (the place). This woman, Lisa, is blond and bears a striking resemblance to Joan d’Arc. While visiting some historical place somewhere or another in Paris, France (the person) spots her and rushes up with an odd look. When she questions him, he apologizes and offers to give her a tour of the area, which she accepts. He then proceeds to lead her around and explain some history and show off some beautiful sights, and he mentions some stuff about Joan d’Arc. She butts in and lists off some stuff she knows, he beams and looks proud and says yes, she’s right. The end of the scene has the two of them standing alone somewhere and him commenting how young Joan was when she was killed, and that he always wished she could have had a better, nicer life. He then states that he is very happy that she got it, while giving this American tourist a gentle smile. She looks away for a moment, distracted by something perhaps, and when she looks back to ask just who the heck he really is, talking about a historical figure like he knew her, he is gone. It’s a very emotional scene in a quiet sort of way, because the watcher/reader understands that he took one look at this woman and instantly believed that she was, in fact, Joan d’Arc reincarnated into a totally different and totally average life, and he is so genuinely happy that a woman he saw as a hero gets this chance to live normally. Whether or not you may personally believe in reincarnation, and regardless of how often other times in the show France is shown as an obnoxious sexaholic, this is an extremely tender scene that lots of fans seriously love. It is very ‘human.’ And I feel like this is what the series as a whole strives to offer. These human moments. They may be peppered in a sort of lackadaisical style in the anime, but they are far more prominent in the comic strips, so it is important to realize that that kind of scene is more of what the creator likes to focus on.

Another very popular and touted scene is the Davie scene. I don’t remember if it was put in the anime or not, I read it as a comic. It was a scene set in colonial America, where the man himself was just a very small child. Little baby America was hanging out in a field with a rabbit and sees this boy, who introduces himself as Davie. Davie brings America to his house and opens up a botany book and points out a blue flower (possibly a forget-me-not) that he wants to see but that isn’t in the New World. America assures Davie that he will find him one of those flowers, and goes off to do so. He fails his search and goes back to Davie, who is older now, but Davie looks embarrassed and turns and walks away. Distressed, America runs to England and explains about the flower, and England says the flower is not there, but they do grow at home, and he will bring some the next time he leaves and comes back. America happily waits, and when England returns with a bouquet of the blue flowers, America takes them and runs off to Davie’s house. He is let in by a boy who looks just like Davie and presents the flowers, and the boy then puts them on (or maybe in) a coffin of an elderly man. America, smiling, does not seem to understand what is going on, and hopefully calls the boy Davie.

This entire scene, in the comic, has very few words. Davie’s name is repeated a few times, but most of the rest of the ‘dialogue’ is in images. The flower, England saying it is not there, etc. This makes the scene extremely poignant, and when we reach the end, we, the audience, realize suddenly that while baby America was fixated on finding a special flower for his new friend, years and years went by, and that friend grew up and got married and had children and eventually died, all while America remained looking the exact same age and understanding the exact same things. Look, folks, I don’t know about you, but that is some angsty stuff right there. I cried. We all cried. We all miss Davie. Mention the name to fans and you will get sobs. We love you, Davie.

Which brings me to my penultimate point, that this series is heartfelt and, while it avoids a lot of the bad of history, can be very poignant about what human nature is like. Human lives are long, very long, but also so very short, they fly by. Some lives end in tragedy, others are mostly peaceful, and maybe we get second chances if you believe in reincarnation, maybe not. Maybe it’s good that our lives are so short, maybe the fate of living forever and watching people you connect with die is tragic. Or maybe it would actually be really fun, having friends for thousands of years that you may squabble with at times but ultimately care for. Maybe nothing is simple and life is about finding joy where you can, and everyone needs to sometimes take a step back and realize that everyone is flawed, and there might be good and evil but the vast majority of people are in a grey area, trying to live their own lives and do what good they can for whatever reason they might give. I want to end with one last topic, one I have not yet addressed this whole time. The big white alien in the room, if you will.

Paint it: White!

There is a Hetalia movie, folks, if you didn’t know it, and it’s called Paint It White. This movie has just as many silly parts as any other Hetalia thing, but it also has a plot! In this movie, strange, all-white aliens are starting to invade the Earth. They arrive and anything they touch, they turn into completely identical white humanoid blobs, even the country personifications. With this scary and seemingly-unstoppable threat, the main eight - America, England, Russia, China, France, Japan, Germany, and Italy - all try to infiltrate the alien spaceship in frankly hideous uniforms to find out more and figure out a way to defeat them. Hijinks and disaster ensues, and at the end, each of them is fighting a mob and gradually being defeated. Italy is the last one standing, and as Germany is slowly being transformed into a blob along with the others, he tells Italy to smile. Italy then finds (or has? the plot isn’t great, it’s just there) a black marker and he suddenly starts going around drawing ridiculous faces on everyone. He draws fitting faces on each of his friend blobs, like a stern face on Germany-blob, a deadpan face on Japan-blob, etc etc. The invaders suddenly stop. They look at each other, marker-faced, and start to laugh. Then their leader of sorts comes out and is basically like “wow, we thought you were all stupid and you have wars and stuff, but this? This is beautiful. Wow. We all look exactly identical on our world, and these faces are cool and new and unique. We’ll turn everyone on your planet back if we can have this magical thingie you’re holding.” And of course Italy hands the marker right over, and everyone is put back to normal, and crybaby, scaredy-cat, useless Italy saves the world.

The plot is, obviously, not super great. It’s not going to win anybody any awards. But it has a very poetic premise. The strength of humans is that they are all unique. Every human has a different face, a different body, a different life. Our differences may cause conflict, but they are also something to celebrate. At the end of the day, Hetalia is an okay show that can get you hooked on history and tries its best to teach you that we’re all only human and there might be war and conflict and bad things, but you have to reach for the good things and find yourself good friends and have stupid laughs and enjoy life, however long or short it may be. I think that that’s a pretty decent message to send out to people.

The Bottom Line

In the end, this is a fandom like many others. Hetalia has its flaws and its cringe moments, and it certainly had its fair share of awful fans. But I truly believe that painting it overall as nazi propoganda and one of the most problematic and harmful shows out there is a blatant lie and disregards… just about everything of the actual content. I think it is difficult for someone to concretely say anything is super good or super bad without seeing at least some of it, or doing some research, and this business of blithely going along with what everyone else says just because they use big danger words does not do anybody any favors. Spreading misinformation is, I’m sure, the exact opposite of what most people want to do. And make no mistake, I am definitely not saying that everyone needs to like, or even watch, the show. If you never ever want to watch this show in your life, that is absolutely fine. Go forth and never watch it. But mindlessly following the herd and yelling overgeneralized, unsupported opinions about it is not a good thing. I beg of you, do research on the things you want to form or share an opinion on, think critically, and for the love of God, do not swipe a giant paintbrush to forsake every single individual fan of a show as a terrible, awful person. By all means, hate nazis, they are pieces of shit. Boycott things that support genocide and fascism, yes, fight for equality, yes. But do not go accusing without thinking, and do not overgeneralize. I leave you with the words of my old laptop bag that I bought years ago at a convention:

Make pasta, not war.

Thank you for reading.

[thegittelbug]

Tips for integrating into a new Jewish community

Moving to a new place can be challenging! I moved somewhere new during the pandemic, and it's gotten me thinking about ways to integrate into a new Jewish community, and even to an extent ways to integrate into your first Jewish community. Not growing up frum, I definitely struggled at first to find my niche, meet people, and feel a part of the larger group. It seemed like others just had an easy connection - a friend from camp, a sibling's former roommate, an old classmate - that helped them out when the first moved in; true or not, it can leave those of us without the same background feeling as if we're always on the outside looking in. I can definitely be a little shy sometimes and very introverted, so here are some suggestions that I've learned over my years beyond just "talking to people at kiddush" that have helped me:

Email the community rabbi and ask for a quick introductory meeting. This can be helpful also to gauge if the community is a good fit for you. I found it helpful to share a bit about my background and ask questions so that the rabbi can start to get to know you as well. Write some questions down beforehand!!

If you are single, try to find a roommate if possible. I found it easy to at least start out with a built in "buddy". Some shuls will have links to housing resources (listserves, forums) on their website or you can find them online.

Find local Jewish Facebook groups. I didn't use to have a Facebook, but I actually created one after college specifically because there were some good resources there. Also, since you can't really exchange phone numbers/emails on shabbat, knowing someone's name and finding them on FB was one of the only reliable ways to connect with them after. FB groups can be helpful for finding a roommate, knowing about different events coming up in the wider community, etc.

Make sure to sign up for any and all relevant list serves, especially shabbos announcements. Actually read them. Don't be afraid to sign up for things in them that interest you.

Google is a good friend. Search "Jewish resources (city name)". Try other variations. Many shul websites will have a local resources page. Find the website of the local Vaad HaRabbonim and read! Just make sure to be a smart internet user; verify the sites you look at come from valid sources because you can find weird things out there :)

Volunteer! There are often little opportunities to help out where you can meet people and feel more connected to your new community. You can find volunteering opportunities on websites, in shabbos announcements, I think I've even just emailed their main contact email saying "hi I'm new and want to get involved"

Attend some classes/shiurim.

And of course: engage with hospitality resources. I've seen some shuls do a GREAT job and others, not so much, so don't get discouraged, but it is worth a try. This can go both ways: when you still haven't fully unpacked, ask if there's someone with an extra seat at their table. If you're feeling up for it, ask if there are some people in need of a meal you can host! It has taken me a very long time to get my head around the idea of asking to be invited to a meal, but it really is a relatively normal thing in Orthodox circles. I also had to get used to "rejection" because sometimes people are legitimately not able to host. Again, try not to get discouraged.

As a reminder to myself and everyone else out there in the process of integrating into a new community, be patient. Building strong connections take time. With G-d's help, may we all find a wonderful community in which to grow and call home.

[emerging-jew]

DNA tests are bullshit and here's why:

*attempt 2 because tumblr mobile only posted the first and last paragraph last time I tried this*

So to start I have a degree in anthropolgy and have studied under people with Ph.Ds in this subject so I have a pretty solid understanding of the issue with them. This post is gonna be a little oversimplified, just to make it more accessible to people.

The reason im making this post is that I've seen several accounts where a person takes the test and is incredibly distraught because "I'm not actually Jewish!" or "I grew up on the reservation but this says im %100 white!" both of those are referencing real cases and it is heartbreaking to see someone think they are a fraud and do not belong in their own culture because of a bogus test.

So what is the the issue with the tests?

Glad you asked. There's a number of issues with these tests, mostly that people don't know what's actually being tested. So let's talk about how (people think) they work:

You put your spit in the tube, send it off, some lab magic produces your whole genetic code and then the scientists look and see what percentage of you is German or Indian or English or whatever. Except that's not actually possible.

There's a misunderstanding about genetics in the general population that's being taken advantage of. There are no genes that can show your race/ethnicity with 100% accuracy. There is no gene that only Asians and no one else has and no gene that only Germans have an no one else. There are genes that are more common in certain groups, maybe people from Germany tend to have Gene "a" but the key word there is "tend", as in not always. There are people from Germany who would not have gene "a" but they are still German.

Going along with this, genes are not specific to a group, so maybe gene "a" is common for Germans... but also common for Nigerians and Polish people.

And another wrench is that people move, a lot. The tests base their findings on going out to the world, finding people, and using them as a base for what genes are common in that population. (this example is simplified so people can understand the basic principle of how it's working) So they'll test a bunch of people that say they're 100% definitely German and use that as the base. So maybe the test a bunch of Germans, find they tend to have genes "a" and "b" a lot and go "well people who have genes a and b are German".

Except those Germans might not actually be German. The standard they use is having lived somewhere for 3 generations (so if someone's great-grandparents immigrated to Germany from Russia their DNA counts as the standard for 100% German). So that gene "a" might actually be coming from an ethnic group in Russia not Germany.

now with a big enough sample size this problem would theoretically go away. Except everyone is moving all the time. Very rarely are there populations that are incredibly isolated and distinct. So most people being tested are going to have some sort of mixed ancestry they probably don't even know about (and also there's the issue of borders, race categories, ethnic categories, etc. being something which is changing and shifting all the time). But even if that issue was solved some groups don't have a big sample sizes, sometimes there's only a handful of people willing to share their DNA to be the base of their entire ethnic group (especially non-european groups).

Not to mention the issue of "trash DNA". One of the people I studied under did a lot of genetic research in Mexico. For over a decade they kept finding really strange genetic markers that didn't match up with what they expected to find so they just ignored it; until eventually figuring out those markers came from the sephardic Jews who fled the inquisition to Mexico so all of those people tested were having Jewish ancestory over looked because it wasnt understood at the time.

The tests can be fun. I wouldnt reccomend it because they're collecting health data and genetic markers to be sold and really don't tell you anything, but some people find it fun. Just treat ot more like an over priced horoscope than somthing that determines if you really belong to your culture. Your community and your family and your history determine that, not some spit in a tube.

[jewishconvertthings]

Online Conversion Classes?

Hey everyone - I know I’ve been AWOL for a while, but I came across something that I think I have an absolute responsibility to share with you all. 

Previously on this blog, others have asked about Darshan Yeshiva. I passed on vouching for it or denying its credibility at the time because I didn’t know anything about it, really. 

It has come to my attention that it may very well be a scam. 

Apparently back in 2014, it was part of a giant mess related to “Rabbi” Jonathan Ginsburg, a disgraced former Conservative rabbi who was performing online conversions for pay. I guess Darshan Yeshiva was being run by one of his rabbinic student grads from his equally fraudulent online rabbinic program. 

Needless to say, the Rabbinic Assembly’s website (RA is the official and only professional organization for Conservative clergy) specifically denies any affiliation with Mr. Ginsburg and says that it will not accept any conversion performed by him or any beit din affiliated with him. 

Now, all of the sources I found are from 2013 - 2014 thereabouts. It is possible that they’ve cleaned up their organization and taken out the trash - although I have not seen any evidence of this in my research and I really think I would if they’d done this. Furthermore, I have not seen any public notices, disclaimers, updates, or apologies. 

Look - far be it from me to tell you what to do with your lives - but my advice would be to avoid it like the plague. I am not sure if they are even still operational, but considering that Mr. Ginsburg has been acting dishonorably since he stepped down from his large congregational post after sexually abusing a congregant in 2004? I seriously doubt that he isn’t out there somewhere. Even if he is not personally involved, his legatees, such as Patrick “Aleph” Beaulier, may well be. 

A quick summary of good advice for those newly exploring Judaism: 

You really need the community experience to know if you actually like Jews, Jewish spaces, and practicing Judaism in a community enough to want to be Jewish. Online resources are great, reading is essential, but both will only take you so far. 

Always, always, always check out your rabbi’s credentials before converting with them, because your ability to be recognized as Jewish stands on the shoulders of the reputation and validity of the rabbinic authority you converted with. Make sure you find out about their local reputation, their broader reputation within their identified movement, and honestly just google them. Do some digging. You won’t regret doing it, but you might regret not doing it. 

Reputable rabbis do not charge you money to convert you. Let me repeat that: reputable rabbis do not charge you money to convert you. There may be a fee for actual classes, and these classes may be required. There will be a fee to use the mikveh, you will need to pay a mohel for the bris, and there may be travel costs involved. Obviously there is a cost embedded in purchasing ritual items that you will use in your home and the cost of learning materials for both classes and independent study. Conversion to Judaism is not cheap, and especially living an observant life often requires many life changes with associated costs. However, the actual “yes I will accept you as a student” and the final eventual “yes I will agree to sponsor you for conversion in front of a beit din”? Should not be something you pay for. Put another way: getting approval to convert should not depend on whether or not you pay the rabbi. Any costs that you expend should be directly tied to defraying the costs of your process for the community, rather than giving those in charge of saying yes or no a financial incentive to say yes. 

Especially critical in this time of social distancing, when basically all Jewish stuff has moved online, is to recommend that any online community you access for purposes of conversion? Should be tied to an actual brick-and-mortar community, ideally the one you intend to participate in once we are again able to convene. 

For those looking to do further reading about the whole debacle that is (/was?) Darshan Yeshiva and its affiliates, please see this comprehensive post: https://hardcoremesorah.wordpress.com/2014/01/22/jewish-conversion-scams-still-trying-to-thrive-on-the-internet/. 

[famous-aces]

Marilyn Monroe

Who: Marilyn Monroe (born Norma Jeane Mortenson) 

What: Actress, Model, and Singer

Where: American-Jewish (active largely in US)

When: June 1, 1926 - August 4, 1962

(Image Description: a photo of Marilyn Monroe by Richard Avedon from 1957. It is a black and white image showing Monroe on a sparkly dress from the waist up. It almost feels weird to describe her, her face is so famous. She is a white pale woman with an oval face and heavily lidded eyes with long lashes. She has full lips with a beauty mark beside them. She is wearing makeup and has her trademark short, curly, blonde hair. She has her arms hanging limply at her side. Instead of posing sexily she looks to be lost in thought, looking somewhere off camera. End ID) 

Marilyn Monroe is The Hollywood Beauty. The quintessential sexy starlet. Even if you have never seen a movie with her in it, you know who she was, a bit like possible aces I have covered before Andy Warhol or Sir Isaac Newton, you can picture her in your mind just by existing in Western popular culture. She has become a part of our communal consciousness. Her life was brief and marked by tragedy below the glitz and glamor. Her biggest role was playing Marilyn Monroe.

She was intelligent, warm, and a gifted actress, but she is rarely remembered for that. She is far better remembered for singing Happy Birthday to her sometime beau President Kennedy and for the scene in The Seven Year Itch when wind from a subway grate blows up her skirt. You've seen it. Really her whole persona was often created rather than who she really was. She was an actress in her real life, unfortunately.

Monroe actually came into the spotlight in the Second World War when she posed for photos for the boys on the front. From there her modeling, singing, and acting career skyrocketed. Until her tragic death at the age of 36 she was among the go-to actresses for those sexpot roles especially in comedies. Her death by potentially intentional drug overdose (discovered by her psychologist) is just one piece of the evidence of how much of her life was hidden, like her struggles with substance abuse and mental health.

She was famous for playing Blond Bombshells and Dumb Blonds.  She was all beauty, glamor, and sex appeal and it earned her millions of dollars. She always wanted to be more though, unfortunately she never really got it. "Please don't make me a joke," she told a journalist, "End the interview with what I believe...I want to be an artist, an actress with integrity...I want to grow and develop and play serious dramatic parts. My dramatic coach tells everyone that I have a great soul, but so far nobody's interested in it." 

She is best known for as an icon and emblem of the popular culture of the 1950s and early 1960s, but her most definitive/important roles include All About Eve (1950) (a small role that would lead to her "discovery" and contract with 20th Century Fox), Monkey Business (1952), How to Marry a Millionaire (1953), Niagara (1953), Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1953), The Seven Year Itch (1955), Some Like it Hot (1959), The Misfits (1961), and her final film, released posthumously as a short, Something's Gotta Give (1962). She also sang "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend" and the very sexually charged "Happy Birthday Mr. President" (just the song here). 

(Image Description: the poster for Gentlemen Prefer Blondes. It shows drawings of Jane Russel and Marilyn Monroe in red costumes the size and shape of one piece bathing suits that are sheer or pink on top. They have on red top hats and long black and white necklaces. They have black canes and are dancing with one leg upraised. Behind them is a busy Paris scene done in a more cartoony/simplified style. There are musical notes around them. Their names are above their heads in blue.  Below them on a black rectangle it says (in white and orange) "in Howard Hawks' Gentlemen Prefer Blondes [in] Technicolor" below that rectangle but above the studio info in blue it says "co-starring Charles Coburn". End ID) 

Probable Orientation: Mspec Ace

Oh, I am going to get a lot of hate for this one.

And a lot of people are going to show a lot of misogyny and aphobia, be it overt, unintentional, or internalized.  Indeed the first thing the first (allo) person I told these findings to said "but she had a ton of sex!" Yes, that is true, she did, and so do some other aces.

Not to mention that Monroe's relationship with sex was a complicated one. A very complicated one. Monroe had a deeply traumatic childhood (mentally ill mother, tossed between foster homes and orphanages) and married extremely young -- she had turned 16 just two and a half weeks earlier -- to prevent her from becoming homeless and returned to the orphanage after her most recent foster family planned on moving out of state and leaving her behind. Then while working a munitions plant in L.A. she became a model for the troops in World War II, aged 18. From her teen years she was made aware that sex was expected from her, thrust into adulthood and positions she might not have been comfortable with. She was a beautiful woman and people wanted her and she accepted that because it did get her what she wanted.

(Image Description: the 1944 factory photos that launched Monroe's modeling career, taken by David Conover for Yank Magazine at the Radioplane Munitions Factory in which she worked. Interestingly the commanding officer that sent him to take the photos was Ronald Reagan. The photo shows an 18-year-old Monroe. She is holding a small propeller and is beside some kind of red machine. She is wearing a simple green top and gray bottoms with a photo ID badge at her waist. She wears a wedding ring. She has much frizzier brown hair. She is smiling broadly. End ID)  

Over the course of her life she was in love with and had sexual relationships with many different men and women. That doesn't mean she was sexually attracted to them. Indeed throughout her life she had a lot of difficulty with sex. She didn't like it. She thought she must have been doing it "wrong" and stated that a lot of her sex appeal was applied to her rather than something she felt. She was playing to the crowd. Which makes sense, Monroe was a people pleaser. She desired closeness, she romantically loved many people, I have no doubt, and from the time she was a teenager the best appreciated way to show it was by being sexual. The fact that later in life she had a sexual encounter with a literal 16-year-old when she was 30 shows she had a pretty fucked up understanding of what was appropriate sexually. The 16-year-old was the leader of her fan club, she also had an affair with her acting coach, her first husband was her neighbor who was kind to her. She was loving the people who loved her and was showing it the way society told her to. (On her being mspec, there were several women she had affairs with, including the fan and acting coach mentioned above, indeed it has been speculated she was more attracted to women than men).

No matter how she appeared on screen, she voiced fear that she was broken and frigid to her psychologist (who agreed with her) because she didn't really enjoy/want sex.  The desire of wanting to fix herself and wanting to please the people who loved her and who she may have romantically loved in return. She probably romantically loved some of these people but didn't know how to separate that from the sexual aspect or didn't want to lose them if she did. She was giving them what they wanted and expected and what culture told her was essential to normal loving relationships.

Her sexual "failure" was a subject she returned to often in therapy throughout her life. She had only one sexual encounter she actually said she enjoyed and it seemed to be more of a relief because it made her normal than what she got from the sex itself.

She said again and again that she wasn't the sexpot people thought she was, nobody listened.

(Image Description: a series of photos from a photoshoot from Life Magazine. It shows Monroe at home in 1953, a huge year in her career. The photographer is Alfred Eisenstaedt [a photographer of whose work I am extremely fond]. They show Monroe wearing a dark turtleneck and checkered trousers. She is in a bunch of different positions and wearing different expressions. Some of these appear candid and others posed. I am especially fond of one in the middle in which she appears to be trying to stop herself from laughing or sneezing. I like to imagine it is the former. It is very human. End ID)

“People had a habit of looking at me as if I were some kind of mirror instead of a person. They didn’t see me, they saw their own lewd thoughts, then they white-masked themselves by calling me the lewd one.”

-Marilyn Monroe

"I never quite understood it, this sex symbol. I always thought symbols were those things you clash together! That's the trouble, a sex symbol becomes a thing. I just hate to be a thing. But if I'm going to be a symbol of something I'd rather have it sex than some other things they've got symbols of."

—Monroe in an interview for Life in 1962 (both of these quotes illustrate that her "sex appeal" was manufactured and applied rather than her own natural state. Her audience made it clear what they wanted and she played to it.)

"A man who had kissed me once had said it was very possible that I was a lesbian because apparently I had no response to males - meaning him...I didn't contradict him because I didn't know what I was... Now, having fallen in love, I knew what I was. It wasn't a lesbian."

-Marilyn Monroe in her autobiography My Story (written 1954, published 1974). (Note that she has "no response". She loves a man, this one or another, but she has "no response" to men physically. That is the only response he could comment on, her physical one. Clearly she feels some kind of attraction to someone eventually, but not sexually/physically. It is the difference between romantic and sexual love. It also shows that homosexuality and asexuality have always overlapped.)

"Primary frigidity" 

-the diagnosis from Monroe's therapist Dr. Ralph Greenson, he worked to "cure" her of this "frigidity"

“Maybe I’m a sexless sex goddess.” 

– Marilyn Monroe to Life magazine journalist Richard Meryman, 1961

(Image Description: a photo of Marilyn Monroe behind the scenes on the set of The Misfits in 1960, photographed by Inge Morath.  She is leaning across a table and smiling at someone to the right of the frame. She has tired eyes. End ID) 

[dailyaudiobible]

09/15/2020 DAB Transcript

Isaiah 19:1-21:17, Galatians 2:1-16, Psalms 59:1-17, Proverbs 23:13-14

Today is the 15th day of September welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I'm Brian it is…it's great to be here with you today as we continue this journey, the journey of this week and the journey of a lifetime through the Scriptures day by day step-by-step. And, so, glad that we can be together, glad that we get this time together, glad that I can be here in the rolling hills of Tennessee and you can be wherever on this big blue planet that you are and that we can still be together. And it's not just me and you. It's all of us. We’re all in this together on this journey. And, so, what a joy, what a privilege, what an honor, what a miracle even. Like what a crazy thing is this that we live on this earth and something exists called the Internet and it allows us to be together like this. So, feeling grateful today. But let's dive in. We’re reading from the English Standard Version this week. We’re in the book of Isaiah in the Old Testament and we've just gotten going in the letter to the Galatians in the New. So, today Isaiah chapters 19, 20 and 21.

Commentary:

Okay. So, today is a bit of a context day as we move further into the letters of Paul and specifically into this letter to the Galatians because although there's really important theological things to be said in the book of Galatians that inform our understanding of our faith, the context for why these things were said in the first place is actually really super-duper important and we’ve touched on some of this in the other of Paul's letters, and we touched on this a little bit yesterday when we were just getting going into the…the letter to the Galatians.  But basically, today we kind of get Paul's testimony about how his…how the gospel had come to him in the first place. And, so, I guess it's…I guess it's important to note that Paul's version of how that happened in Galatians is a little bit different than how it's portrayed, for example, in the book of acts, but this is in Paul's own hand. This is his own testimony. And we have this Damascus Road experience where a bright light send him to the ground, right, and he can't see and it’s Jesus talking to him and he’s on his way to persecute the church. And that holds true throughout all of the testimonies of Paul's conversion but Paul says in Galatians that he…he wasn't really influenced by the people in Jerusalem, like he had essentially been living into the faith for 17 years, for more than 17 years and that he had not received the truth of the gospel from any person, that he received it as a revelation from Jesus. He'd only met Cephas or Peter once and I mean that was like 14 years ago. And the only other like important leader in the Jerusalem church Jesus ever met was or that Paul ever met was Jesus brother James. So, Paul's claiming that the gospel he's preaching is a direct revelation from Jesus himself. This creates some problems, especially the Jew / Gentile problem that we…we have talked about it on a number of occasions. So, I don't need to go back into it again. We probably understand that territory but in Galatians today we hear about people sneaking into this spy on…on the meetings that Paul's having and these are Judaizers, these are people who believe that…that you have to convert to Judaism in order to follow Christ. In order to be a disciple of Christ you have the first follow the Jewish religion. Paul is obviously adamantly against that notion. And it seems from the Scriptures that God was doing a new thing because the Holy Spirit was coming upon the Gentiles. And, so, that's how they finally had to agree, like “we’re not making a decision here. God has already made the decision. We just have to support what God is doing.” This is a big deal because in so many ways it kinda renders Judaism obsolete. Paul is saying the law the Torah is fulfilled, the old covenant is done, a new covenant has been ratified through the blood of Christ, we are living in a different time under different circumstances, we’re going forward in a different new direction that God is leading. I mean it's hard to take that leap. It's a huge leap of faith, especially if you're a Jewish person who has only known it one way. To take that leap is difficult. To understand that Christ fulfills the obligations of the law and that through Him so can we. That's good news, but it's difficult news to embrace. So, that's like the theological or spiritual thing but it's…it's deeper than that. Like Jews and Gentiles did not like party together at all. They…they weren't social in any real way. Jews were separatists. They were thought of as strange by the rest of the Empire and they wore it as a badge of honor, to be separated, to be set apart as holy. So, a Jewish person looked at a Gentile person, a Roman, essentially as an occupier, as their oppressors, the people that were marginalizing them, the people that were pushing them to the outskirts of society. So, it would be difficult for them to just open their arms and embrace the people that they felt were oppressing them. It would be hard for them to have any sort of meaningful relationship because there is inherent prejudice there, right? There’s inherent fear of those with the privilege of being a Roman citizen. Like, they could do things that would be detrimental to the Hebrew community if they all got together to be happy together and then something goes sideways. And, so, Paul in his letter to the Galatians is basically like, “I had to even confront Peter, the apostle Peter, like the one who got out of the boat and walked on the water to Jesus even though he went underwater.” Like Paul's confronting him because he…he's not being consistent. He’s coming around Gentile believers in churches and fellowshipping with them and having really open community with them until people in the Jerusalem church are around and then he's being all separatist and all ‘follow the law’ and…and…and not being hospitable. So, we’re seeing…we’re seeing the tensions that existed as the faith began to grow and flourish. We’re seeing what was going on here through these letters. And we can wonder like, “why such…it just doesn't…like now 2000 years later we’re mostly Gentiles. Like some of these things don't seem like that big of a deal. Like it all got settled somewhere along the line and here we are.” But these kinds of tensions still exist. They just have different iterations, there just from different perspectives, but they still exist. And why is Paul being so defensive? Like, what's he after? Ultimately, well, first of all he’s defending the revelation of Jesus Christ that he received. This is what he believes. This is what he is convinced of. This is what he will die for…and he does. He did die for it. But beyond that it's freedom. He, as a Pharisee, had done everything he could possibly do to live up to a relationship, like to get himself in a position to have the knowledge and awareness and relationship with God. And no matter how hard he tried he failed. And then Jesus is raised from the dead and reveals himself to him and he begins to realize we’re free, we’re free from all of that. Like there’s a whole new thing going on. Freedom is given to us, spiritual freedom to be in direct contact and in relationship with God. This is a big deal. This isn't going to happen the ritual and adherence to some sort of ethics or law. Christ has done it all and restored us to God, and now we can call God Father, Abba. We can enter His presence. This a big deal. This is his conviction. Like I said just a second ago, then that renders that whole culture the…under Torah, the whole culture, the way the whole thing was set up becomes somewhat obsolete. And that's a difficult controversy. This is why people want to kill Paul. This is why Paul ultimately gets killed. This is also ultimately why we believe what we believe as Christians, that freedom has been given to us, that we have been…been made right, we have been justified because we have faith in Christ and freedom comes from that. Freedom, that a set of rules, even if we could live up to them can’t provide. So, this gives us some context. They were wrestling, which explains why we often are wrestling. Ironically, we’re wrestling over freedom. And in the coming days as we move through Galatians, we’re gonna get a good glimpse of that. And as we continue through the letters of Paul, some of like…some of the stuff is unbelievable when we are told what Christ has done, and who we are, and what that means. But those are in the days ahead.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word. We thank You that we can look into it and we can see an honest view of the struggle. We…all we have to do is just look around in the world and see that there is an honest struggle continually going on in some direction and what we are grateful for is that You are the sovereign God, You are the Lord of all, no matter what we think. No matter what we think You are the most-high God, and You will have Your way. And our desire is to be in the middle of that, what You are doing in us and in this world. And, so, we open ourselves to You, Holy Spirit. We open ourselves to Your leadership, to Your comfort, to Your correction, to Your guidance. Come and do what You’ve promised. Lead us into all truth we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

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And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hey DAB family this is Allie from Oregon. Hey, I’m just calling to ask for prayer for all of the communities around the Pacific Northwest and California area that are currently being affected by fire or the threat of fire. Just ask that YTou would, Lord that you would help provide peace and provide safety to the families that are in jeopardy or the families that are already lost their homes as well as for all of the first responders, firefighters, volunteers that are coming together to help with this. It’s been…it’s been a long week and I know that there’s a lot of people that have lost their homes or their homes are in jeopardy. So, we just pray for peace and through all of this that Your will be done and that You would cause people to come together. And Lord I also pray for work in progress. I know he called as well for California and we lift California up as well, that You would just touch them and bring these fires to an end. Thanks guys.

Good morning Daily Audio Bible family this is Kelsey from Washington state and I am new to Daily Audio Bible but I’m so thankful to have this opportunity to listen and hear God’s word together. Thank you, Brian. Right now I’m sitting on our back porch looking up at the sky and it’s a little bit hazy with smoke from all the wildfires but I wanted to call in to ask for prayer for a family that I know who has been deeply impacted and is going through tragedy due to the wildfires here in Washington. I want to lift up Jacob, Jamie, the Highland family who, you know, they’re in the hospital in critical condition right now and they lost their little one-year-old, Arielle to the fire’s here in Washington. And please just pray for their recovery, pray for, you know, this long journey that they have ahead and for just comfort from the Lord, you know, in relation to the loss of their son. He was beautiful. And also, for I…I…heard also that Jamie is pregnant and for this baby and just protection and protection from…for both of them from infection because their bodies have…have severe third-degree burns. Thank you so much, your prayer’s means so much. God bless you all. Thank you.

Hey family this is John the Prodigal. Hey, I’ve got a celebration actually believe that or not and a couple of prayer requests. Number one my son who was on heroin, we went through 25 doctors and finally found a doctor to work with him. Got him on the prescription that they took him off of after seven years cold turkey. He has no knees, blew em’ out skateboarding and he’s in constant pain. So, he turned to heroin. Anyway, he’s in good shape now, he’s happy now, got him turned around and that’s has everything to do with your prayers. I also ask for your…so I said it’s a celebration. I also ask for prayer for…for Jane a friend of mine who’s living in London. She is living in a church there and every night she runs in fear of being stabbed or raped. A good friend of hers was attacked…was shot in an attempted rape there. And, so, I tried to help her out as best I can but I, as you know I am totally broke, but I’ve done what I can. To that end I’d also ask your prayers for me. I’m trying to reinvent myself, rebuild my business, build back and the love of God and with God in my sites instead of me. And, so, my pride is broken. I’ve been humbled. I am a Job and trying to rise again. And with that I’d ask…I’d ask any more prayers for me I feel selfish when I do but I just wanted to let you know that I’m praying for you all and the man who called for the son with muscular dystrophy to people who are divorcing like me yo all those who are suffering and praying with depression. I feel for you all. I’ve got it all and I’ve got your facts. And so does God. So, you make a blessed day. Know I love you, know I pray for you all every day even though I don’t say your names. You’re in my heart. God bless you thank you Brian and Jill. Have a good day. Bye.

Good morning everybody hey this is Annette Allison from Oklahoma City. Get your seatbelt on girl. Hey isn’t the Lord cool? I’ll tell you what he is just amazing. __ inspiring stories of hope here recently that He is just amazing. My son, my stepson who is in the Air Force, his career has been tried to be put down and destroyed by a guy who is just like new in command and trying to make a name for himself and my stepson who’s just as straight as an arrow, I’ll tell you he is such a good good young man. It’s a truly amazing to me. The Lord has just taken this whole situation and turned it for the good and has really shown my stepson what the path of faith really looks like. And I’m just so proud of how he has stayed the course and how the Lord has turned all this around and for good. He even got a promotion and a recommendation out of this. It’s amazing. And my stepson James is doing excellent. He went to a…a little prison camp situation where they teach the kids how to behave basically and has come out smelling like a rose, top of his class, and is working and doing very, very well. I’m so proud of these kids. Anyway, I love you guys. Have a wonderful day. Bye-bye.

This is BB in Florida I’m requesting prayer for my niece Nancy who at the present time is in the hospital battling cancer. The cancer has traveled through her spinal column into her brain and the prognosis that the doctors are giving them is not good. I’m asking for prayers to come against the excruciating pain that she is under with severe headaches and backaches. She has not been able to eat or to keep medicine down. I’m asking that for prayers for the pain management team to find the right combination of medicine for her that they will no longer be chasing the pain, but they will be able to stop the pain completely. She’s been in the hospital now for about two weeks and it’s very hard on the family as only one person can be in her room with her at a time. Just pray, Father God that He would grant this family and all those of her friends, peace and strength, that the doctors would have words of encouragement today for this family. We serve a faithful God and a loving God, and I just pray for His mercy, Your kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven. Amen.

Hi this is my first time ever being on this site asking for prayer. I have been actually reading since almost the first of the year and so love this site. And I come to you burdened about my children. I have two sons who are not serving the Lord at all, as far as they could possibly be from the Lord. And it’s such a burden. And I just pray that my brothers and sisters in Christ can uplift my two sons Lee and Austin. And my prayer is that I’ll be able to spend my days worshiping with them and that we can be one in spirit. And I pray for my husband to be strong as a leader so that he will be able to show these sons of ours what needs to be done in order to be a child of God and a man of God. My name is Sherry and I look forward to seeing the results of these prayers. Thank you so much.

Hi everybody this is Stephanie. I’m the Lord’s Chic from Oklahoma. As many of you know my son passed away about three months ago and my mom the year before. I am 55 years old and after decades of being clean I have fallen back into bad habits. It started with food and then it went to tranquilizers and painkillers and diet pills and I’ve had a drink for the first time in literally decades. I picked up a pack of cigarettes last week. I just…anything I can do to make the pain go away but it doesn’t go away. So, I’ve been a Christian for a really long time. My husband has absolutely zero knowledge of all this. So far I’m completely functional with my job and family but I…I need to stop completely. And, so, today is day one. I just really need for you all to pray for me before I completely ruin my career and my family. Nobody knows about this. I have a best friend in Oregon that I’ve confided in, but I mean if they were to pull a tox screen at work would be cooked and my nursing license would be gone. So, you know, some of this is prescription some is not. I just need a lot of prayer please. I need to get back and trust God the way they used to. Thanks.

[wenevergotusedtoegypt]

Hello! I'm a 23F patrilineal, native Israeli who's decided on converting. The only issue I'm having is that I'm genuinely terrified that, as a result of this path I'm taking, there's a strong chance that I'll end up being single forever since I'll be "older" (26ish) in the frum community by the time I've finished the process. I was just wondering if you have any words of advice on how a person can cope with anxieties about this, if the option to not convert simply doesn't feel like an option?

I’m really happy you reached out! Just in case you’re not aware (because I don’t know how long you’ve been aware of my blog/everyone uses mobile these days and doesn’t see the about page), I’m also patrilineal and converted when I became frum during college. So I 100% understand that not converting isn’t an option for you, and I’m not even going to hint at it as a possibility (when asked on my beis din application back in the day why I wanted to convert, my answer essentially amounted to, “I mean I guess you don’t HAVE to convert me, but I literally don’t know how not to be Jewish, so I will keep practicing in some form no matter what and I will marry a Jew no matter what, so…it’s up to you”).

So first of all, unless the information that you’ll be 26 by the time you finish the process is coming from someone with authority on the subject (i.e. your beis din), I’m not sure that that’s necessarily the case. If you’ve been raised with Judaism (and if you’re Israeli, it sounds like that must be the case to at least some degree!) and have already made a firm commitment to observance, a beis din should take that into account. You’re really not in the same boat as someone with no Jewish background who initially goes in with no real idea what they’re getting into, has to learn absolutely everything from scratch, and doesn’t already have clear ties to Jewishness to aid in establishing their commitment. I know of someone with a patrilineal background who took years to finish conversion, but that situation was totally botched and they ended up starting over with a new beis din and taking only a matter of months from that point. My own conversion took 7.5 months from 1st beis din meeting to mikvah (and would have been shorter, but I was living in another city and couldn’t travel to the beis din to go to the mikvah until later). Conversion should be a highly individualized process, and for someone in your situation, that process should not take years.

That said, if maybe it’s a situation where you’re converting in Eretz Yisroel with the rabbanut and there’s bureaucracy that doesn’t allow for a sped-up process (I don’t know, but knowing what I do of Israeli bureaucracy, it wouldn’t shock me) or it actually will take that long for any other reason, I really don’t think you need to worry. While 26 would generally be a bit late for an FFB to first start shidduchim, I can tell you as someone who regularly receives shidduch resumes that there are plenty of FFBs who don’t get married by then…but also, you’re not an FFB, and there are many other people who aren’t FFBs who also don’t start shidduchim until a bit later, or who do start earlier but don’t get married right away. The dating pool for a 26-year-old is still plenty big. And it’s so impossible to predict shidduchim, because ultimately, no matter how early you start and how much effort you put in and how great a person you are, Hashem decides when you will meet your bashert and you will not find him a moment sooner than that. I count myself to have officially started shidduchim shortly before I turned 22 (though I had 1 or 2 suggestions pop up a year or so before that), and I didn’t meet my husband until I was 26 and a half. I have a friend who didn’t start shidduchim until she was almost 27, and she got married 6 days after me to the first and only person she ever dated, who had also never dated anyone other than her. You just can’t know. But what you CAN know is that Hashem is not going to deny you your bashert just because you were born to a non-Jewish mother and weren’t able to become halachically Jewish until later in life (after all, that was literally His fault – He runs the world!).

I’ll be honest though, I think everyone deals with anxiety about the possibility of being alone forever at some point. It’s a worry that transcends reason – meaning that if your reason for being anxious weren’t your age when you will finish conversion, it would be something else. You can do your best to keep a positive mindset, but sometimes you just have to power through and keep going despite that anxiety. It’s really hard to see the light when you’re down in the depths of the dating process (or the not-yet-started dating process, in your case), but I find that very often, once people DO find their bashert, it ends up being clear to them why they had to wait however long they had to wait. Me for example – I started shidduchim in early 2014. I wasn’t able to see/admit it at the time, but I don’t think I was fully emotionally available to meet my husband until probably mid-2016. Except…at that point, he wasn’t in shidduchim yet. He didn’t start dating until around a year later, mid-2017. But in mid-2017, he was in the army and planning to make a career of that, and if I’d seen his shidduch resume at that point, I would have said no without even meeting him because I wasn’t interested in being an army wife. So I had to wait until he decided to change his career plans in early 2018, at which point someone did try to set us up, but his rabbi never gave him my resume. Why? We don’t know what the rabbi’s reasoning was, but in the bigger picture, it was because I got a substantial raise in July 2018, and without that raise, we wouldn’t be able to afford to live where we do. So if we had met in early 2018, we would have had to move somewhere else and who knows where we’d be. I got the raise on July 1, and our first date was July 3. In retrospect, it’s clear that Hashem had this all planned out every step of the way, but there was no way for us to see it at the time and both of us experienced periods of despair where we felt like we’d be alone forever.

Hatzlacha with your conversion and finding your bashert quickly and with full clarity for both parties, and feel free to drop back in (anon or not) if you ever want to chat!

[punkscowardschampions]

Sick Kids

ihatemyguts: Hey, who's about today? brainpain: 👀 brainpain: 👃 brainpain: 👅 ihatemyguts: Uncanny brainpain: I know ihatemyguts: Artistic endeavors keeping you busy? brainpain: [a selfie of her dramatic 🌈 makeup aesthetic] ihatemyguts: Okay but I'm gonna need a tutorial ihatemyguts: I never even mastered lipstick brainpain: I'll hook you up brainpain: check your private msgs ihatemyguts: 👍🙏 ihatemyguts: if my face is gonna be 🌚 from now on, it should really look pretty ihatemyguts: #juststeroidthings brainpain: it's a good face brainpain: + if I can rock a half shaved head with my brainpain: 👀 brainpain: 👃 brainpain: 👅 brainpain: not a time to still be alive brainpain: LMAO ihatemyguts: no doubt you rocked it so well everyone thought it was a choice brainpain: you gotta act like you're starting a 🌚 worshipping cult brainpain: I'll do a tutorial for that brainpain: full face of silver ihatemyguts: I can get down with that ihatemyguts: 🙌🌊🩸🐺🙌 ihatemyguts: am here on a bit of a recruitment mission, actually brainpain: my housemates & I are all synced 🩸 wise so you'd be doing me a favour, newbie brainpain: living battle royale over here brainpain: not trying to recruit you to fight to the death by my side though, we're good brainpain: what's the job? ihatemyguts: That sounds delightful, man ihatemyguts: also lowkey how has that never happened, not even with my ma ihatemyguts: clearly just that cold and standoffish she's like nah ihatemyguts: maybe I should wait 'til Zach is here too 'cos it was kinda his idea but if I give cred now, we're all good and I can take the blame if it's a big nope brainpain: you're still a 👶 not even gonna be synced with yourself yet brainpain: hold up I'll drag him by his curls brainpain: out there having a life like a real boy 😤 ihatemyguts: 😂 ihatemyguts: he'll get tricked into going to a weird Funland island and get turned into a donkey for his crimes, it's okay brainpain: sounds lit brainpain: [inandout has entered the chat] inandout: 🤥 ihatemyguts: How's your conscience? ihatemyguts: 🦗🦗🦗 inandout: 💎 clear ihatemyguts: 🤨 suspect inandout: you're not my wine mum inandout: or vodka aunt ihatemyguts: How rude ihatemyguts: Put some respect on your cult leader inandout: 🙇🙏 inandout: no food offerings ihatemyguts: safe bet gotspoons: 👋 I'm here! gotspoons: having a great day today, actually got energy, whaaaa?! 😲🤭 inandout: quick! float the idea while she's on cloud 9 gotspoons: You make me sound like an ogre, Zach 😜 gotspoons: what's going on? brainpain: Princess ogre ihatemyguts: Fiona ihatemyguts: v chic ihatemyguts: anyway, as we're all 👍 besides battle royale 🩸 ihatemyguts: we was thinking, and talking 'bout, a potential meetup ihatemyguts: thought we'd float it, see what y'all 💭 brainpain: I've got a 🍳 I'm 👍 + in ihatemyguts: which princess is that? one with crazy long hair, I 👀 it ihatemyguts: it could be cool, yeah? and why not, we'd have to make sure everyone who wants to can obvs or what's the point but apart from that brainpain: Princess me, unless the bleach makes it all fall out 😬 brainpain: [a very her style location] 📌🌎 inandout: we're not doing it there gotspoons: This is the problem, guys 😩 gotspoons: it would be really awesome but there is SO much planning you'd have to do to make it safe for everyone gotspoons: and picking a place for everyone that meets all the requirements inandout: we're willing to do all that inandout: planning + safety stuff ihatemyguts: totally ihatemyguts: like we could even go to a park or somewhere totally neutral ihatemyguts: or see if we can find some council-owned hall or something, 'cos places like that HAVE to be accessible ihatemyguts: I don't mind calling around and I bet Rich knows lots, and you will think of ALL the ways to keep EVERYONE safe and happy, right Rosie? brainpain: where I used to have support group would actually work brainpain: [a decent location that's like a community centre of something] ihatemyguts: 🙌 that looks legit ihatemyguts: if we explain what we're tryna do, bet they won't even charge us brainpain: I've got a hook up as ⭐ pupil brainpain: had my pick of those circle of chairs tigerbalm: 🙀🙀🙀🙀 tigerbalm: are we REALLY going to be able to meet up in person?! inandout: possibly gotspoons: How are we going to do this, IF we can gotspoons: you have to think about food and drink and seating and how we'd cover that, even if they did give us the venue for free inandout: I'm great with funds, it's assumed and expected gotspoons: but is that fair? gotspoons: I know some of us have none or very little inandout: I won't charge any of you a fee to come through the doors inandout: not that Jewish gotspoons: Oh, Zach! ihatemyguts: 🤑 is an accessibility issue, this should be a service, it should exist for free ihatemyguts: but it doesn't ihatemyguts: so if we can do this for ourselves, and offer it for free, for as little expense as possible ihatemyguts: maybe people will pull their finger out and consider actually doing their job ihatemyguts: you can write about it on your blog, get the word out brainpain: I'll fund-raise on stream, I've got your backs, nerds ihatemyguts: Right? High🖐 ihatemyguts: it's for US, so all of us that can, will put money into it ihatemyguts: no pressure on the ones that can't, fuck that, if anyone is gonna be that arsehole then they aren't welcome, yeah? tigerbalm: my parents have a people carrier, cos of course they do, but my creepy uncle won't be invited if any of y'all need rides ihatemyguts: 🤩🤩🤩 gotspoons: I'm going to do some research gotspoons: A LOT of research gotspoons: I would hate for anything to happen to anyone is this group tigerbalm: Where's Rich? tigerbalm: he would love to be on the front lines about this gotspoons: He would be a big help gotspoons: I feel like he had a uni thing today, an open day or something like that??? gotspoons: ugh my memory letting me down AS PER tigerbalm: how exciting! tigerbalm: I'll have to quiz him when he shows gotspoons: I know! gotspoons: He always checks in though, he'll be here later brainpain: Moving on, for those of us too brain damaged for further education gotspoons: 😔 brainpain: just me & my raging hormones LOL brainpain: he'll be such a happy nerd gotspoons: that's for sure gotspoons: he'll probably know so many answers to our questions already enablednotdisabled: I thought this group existed in lieu of an in-person group? brainpain: sup dude, it does enablednotdisabled: wouldn't it be potentially exclusionary to take this offline then? enablednotdisabled: realistically, there will be some of us who simply cannot get there inandout: if you wanna get there, we'll make it happen inandout: facetime you in if nothing else works enablednotdisabled: I'm not talking for myself, just others who might not feel confident enough to inandout: collective "you" inandout: we've all got phones enablednotdisabled: I just feel like this group can be quite us vs. them at times enablednotdisabled: hard to get heard if you aren't in the core group tigerbalm: There isn't a core group tigerbalm: everyone is listened to & respected enablednotdisabled: With all due respect, you are a part of it enablednotdisabled: so, of course, you feel that way enablednotdisabled: I'm not suggesting you can't break off and do your own thing, but the main chat of this forum that is meant to be for all of us, isn't the place for it brainpain: this group is what you make it, man brainpain: + the main chat brainpain: hit us with a topic you wanna talk about whenever inandout: it was brought up here so everyone knows they're invited ihatemyguts: I'm new and everyone I've found has been really receptive and welcoming to whatever I've had to say ihatemyguts: it sucks that you've not had that experience yourself but no one here is excluding you right now, least of all Robyn enablednotdisabled: There's a definite atmosphere here, whether you want to acknowledge it or not enablednotdisabled: the guidelines of what is expected and what is acceptable need to be clearer enablednotdisabled: and the moderators, who I've never actually witnessed in chat, should be quicker to put people on the right track, making this more therapeutic/beneficial to all, ban people if necessary brainpain: If you 🔎 hard enough for an atmosphere, it's findable brainpain: when you come in with a definite attitude of your own that's not gonna help none gotspoons: There's no need for us to have an argument, this is supposed to be a positive space gotspoons: if you have a complaint you'd like to make @enablednotdisabled, there is a link to contact the mods directly gotspoons: but I'd be happy to talk to you, privately if you'd prefer, and then we can take it from there? enablednotdisabled: I can handle my own complaints, thanks enablednotdisabled: and this isn't a positive space for me, and plenty other people I've talked to gotspoons: It hurts me to hear that, I'm really sorry and steps do need to be taken to attempt to rectify that then handicapable: I agree, it's cliquey here, unless you're one of the 'popular kids' or core group as @enablednotdisabled said, nobody cares handicapable: @ihatemyguts may be new but her finding a way in doesn't mean the walls aren't there for the rest of us handicapable: I barely log in any more gotspoons: Then let's tackle this culture head on gotspoons: do either of you have suggestions on how we could go about that, so I'm not dominating the conversation handicapable: You're not the one who dominates the conversation ihatemyguts: Don't think we need to @ people with specific comments like that ihatemyguts: not speaking for myself brainpain: @ me, baby brainpain: At least then I could defend myself brainpain: 🤐 though ihatemyguts: You've got the floor, like tigerbalm: It's not a safe space for Lauren if she can't say what she wants to say at risk of being accused of dominating the chat tigerbalm: either you want people to feel listened to or you don't ihatemyguts: And yeah, I am new, but I know Lauren, or anyone else in the chat rn, would not shoot you down if you wanted to change topic enablednotdisabled: It's about who always seems to be dictating the topic enablednotdisabled: we could change it, but then you feel like an interloper ihatemyguts: The conversation has to start somewhere, by someone ihatemyguts: @handicapable admitted to barely logging in now, of course the people who are here more will talk more, that's a given, it doesn't mean you're not allowed to contribute or come in to the convo ihatemyguts: there's no way to avoid that...prompts? mods only? that's not natural, or practical inandout: bible quotes inandout: 1 Peter 5:10 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Why are we quoting scripture? inandout: Lauren's been here for like 2 years but suddenly she's a disruptive force tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Well that's bullshit tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: unless you're a incel on her stream brainpain: you know me brainpain: how was your open day, babe? brainpain: (unless I'm a domineering b word for asking) tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Decent, despite the fact no one was expecting the wheelchair kid tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: despite the fact I called ahead tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: you can dominate me all you want but let me catch up with this apparent shitstorm I've missed brainpain: what a sexy proposition brainpain: I knew I'd missed you enablednotdisabled: Right, that's that conversation over then enablednotdisabled: 👌 brainpain: come on, man ihatemyguts: This is ridiculous ihatemyguts: people have formed meaningful relationships here, they're not allowed to acknowledge that in case someone feels left out, if you've talked to plenty of other people about the state of this forum, then clearly you've formed deeper bonds with them too ihatemyguts: no one here begrudges you that ihatemyguts: you're bound to get on with certain people over others, there's nothing discriminatory about that, it's to be expected tigerbalm: Like, are we supposed to take everything to PMs now? Cos I wanna hear about Rich's open day too but maybe he doesn't wanna type everything out to separate people lots of separate times ihatemyguts: ^You're just being rude, for the sake of it ihatemyguts: Rosie has offered to privately message about this, or you can put it all in an email to the mods tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Okay tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: literally, 'we' (I'll include myself in this core group that you see, even if I don't see that as a valid argument), have done nothing to you two, have never excluded either of you tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: everyone here is welcoming, and was welcoming you before your complaints tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: which aren't rooted in anything I can see as factual tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: what's the actual issue here? you're just hitting out buzzwords handicapable: and you're just jumping to the defence of the girl you like flirting with brainpain: Whoa now! That's not all I am in here tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: See, that's multiple times you've personally made jabs at Lauren tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: none of us have made any comments on you two personally tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: it seems like you're more cliquey than us if you can't see her as a valued member of the group brainpain: I'm not gonna leave cos you want on Rich for being hot af brainpain: shoutout to the new girl for letting that be known though tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Thank you, m'dear (somewhere between 🎩 and 🧢) tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: but thanks for implying I'm so desperate that I'd flirt with a girl I'd never seen before @handicapable tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: things are not quite that bad, I can assure you inandout: we're all that desperate, where have we heard that before? inandout: @normal people tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and we don't deserve any relationships that are deeper than strictly clinical and professional inandout: which is why we don't need to talk to any one person more than once tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Shout your grievances into the void and move on tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: but don't be too depressing about it ihatemyguts: This group doesn't work, you're right, just not for the reasons you're giving ihatemyguts: but we're all welcome to do what we must about making it work, even if I disagree with yours personally ihatemyguts: at least we try, and if you view us as an 'us' then you also view yourself as a group ihatemyguts: which isn't how I see it, or it's meant to be ihatemyguts: it's a group as a whole inandout: I wanted to organise a meet up to make things cooler inandout: sometimes you don't wanna shout shit into the void inandout: you wanna look someone in the eye when you're talking to them inandout: so you don't have to feel othered ihatemyguts: ^^ inandout: I get to do things with all my other friends inandout: that's what you guys are tigerbalm: I don't have other friends, I'm not saying it to make anyone 😿 tigerbalm: but I don't tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: you've got us tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and we don't need to apologize for being friends tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and I think meeting up is a really good idea, I'll be happy to help brainpain: It's okay, Robyn, none of us have done anything wrong gotspoons: I've contacted the moderators, I'll let you know when I get a response brainpain: I did too ✌️ gotspoons: Good, everyone who feels they need to, should gotspoons: I'm glad your open-day went well, Rich brainpain: me too, hot 🤓 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Thanks, guys tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: it's got potential tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: once I get there and make some changes, of course tigerbalm: 🙌 You go, Rich! �� tigerbalm: not to use a banned word but you do inspire me for when I get to uni myself tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: We'll allow it, well I will because I love a compliment tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and you'll be great when you do tigerbalm: I hope my parents won't make me stay local tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: If you don't want to, you shouldn't tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: don't let anything stop you tigerbalm: I'll try not to tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: when you need them, I can throw all the resources and info at you tigerbalm: thanks brainpain: Can we talk about me now cos that's the ONLY reason I'm here LMAO ihatemyguts: @Zach, gonna come at her with your famous line? inandout: you've built it up now ihatemyguts: 🙄 ugh, baby inandout: are we at pet names? cool ihatemyguts: 😂 shut up ihatemyguts: but don't, all voices welcome inandout: yours is dragon ball z inandout: for today ihatemyguts: romantic ihatemyguts: we're meant to be talking about Lauren inandout: Lauren's is low blow ihatemyguts: got a real talent, kid ihatemyguts: may as well do the entire group inandout: wouldn't wanna exclude anyone ihatemyguts: 😏 ihatemyguts: no one will be devastated about that, trust me inandout: damn inandout: or dang ihatemyguts: is that another group rule I've shamelessly flouted? 😬 brainpain: It's a me rule, dragon ball brainpain: you're safe in this safe space ihatemyguts: I'll do my best to mind my Ps & Qs ihatemyguts: 🤞 brainpain: you're fine I'm just aware of my 👵 status brainpain: don't wanna spook the 👶s ihatemyguts: thoughtful ihatemyguts: 👌 brainpain: who knew? brainpain: check me out, not being a huge b word ihatemyguts: honestly, disappointing brainpain: @ my exes ihatemyguts: they aren't here, are they ihatemyguts: @fibro not included brainpain: only my next brainpain: when I snag Rich for myself brainpain: gotta tame that playboy ihatemyguts: so many 💔💔💔 @ this news brainpain: long as you're not brainpain: he's too old for you, babe tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I feel used tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and yes, much too 👴 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: be your ex-husband at this rate brainpain: I'm not gonna say, you can use me too, in front of the children brainpain: but mutual love & respect, boy tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Shocking behaviour, Mrs brainpain: asking for discipline would also be over the line, sir gotspoons: OKAY gotspoons: putting a stop to this convo thank you gotspoons: 😳 gotspoons: 😳 gotspoons: 😳 gotspoons: 😳 gotspoons: have I covered it? brainpain: g dang it, Rich! Have I not been involved in enough controversy for one day? brainpain: turn away from me, you sexy beast gotspoons: you're very cute but terrible gotspoons: ogre princess putting her foot down on this one tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I'll take the blame tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: rushing to your defense again brainpain: 😍 ihatemyguts: sure wish someone would run in and change the topic ihatemyguts: it's like mum and dad have had too much 🍷 inandout: could be a prime time for you to ask Robbie on your first date, dbz ihatemyguts: Oh yeah! 💡 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: 💘 is in the air tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: careful, Zach ihatemyguts: Robyn, have you decided what you're gonna wear to your party yet? tigerbalm: I have a moodboard tigerbalm: would you like to see it? ihatemyguts: Um, absolutely tigerbalm: [that moodboard] ihatemyguts: So, you'd be up for going into town to try-on stuff, right? ihatemyguts: I can think of some shops with some unique stuff tigerbalm: 😺!!! ihatemyguts: Is that a yes 😺 or a I'm calling the police 😺? tigerbalm: I'd love to tigerbalm: my parents might call the police though ihatemyguts: that's alright, I've given you a fake name tigerbalm: they would think so tigerbalm: but their name choices are pretty boring ihatemyguts: at least you've got a super cute name ihatemyguts: if it'd make them feel better though, I'll come meet them or whatever tigerbalm: oh thanks x2 tigerbalm: that's so nice ihatemyguts: 'course ihatemyguts: who doesn't like shopping? inandout: I don't inandout: that much ihatemyguts: that'll be why you didn't ask yourself inandout: I would never third wheel your date inandout: very uncool ihatemyguts: well, if anyone does wanna come along, that'd be alright brainpain: happy to invite myself into any convo or situation ihatemyguts: 🤓 or 😎 ihatemyguts: you could do our makeup ihatemyguts: because not joking about the trainwreck it is when I do ihatemyguts: 🤡 not the theme brainpain: to avoid a spooky 🤡 resurge brainpain: I shall gotspoons: 😱😱😱😱 gotspoons: I hate clowns tigerbalm: SAME! my brothers love the 🤡🎈 films but I can't watch 🙀 gotspoons: Nooooooo gotspoons: even the advert was scary tigerbalm: ever since I went to the 🎪🐘🤡🍿 as a child I'm like traumatised inandout: once I got dragged along when my parents went shopping for a sofa and there was a clown there inandout: as a mascot or something gotspoons: 😭 THAT'S HORRIFYING inandout: fever dreams are made of this inandout: he kept trying to ruffle my hair ihatemyguts: definitely a bad omen ihatemyguts: that clown was there to warn you about...something inandout: I'm not classing it as a date though, you still get to go first inandout: the warning'll simply be my impending death ihatemyguts: your first bad omen ihatemyguts: n'awh inandout: cute, right? ihatemyguts: 🐭 🐹 🐰 inandout: 🐿🦔 ihatemyguts: 🦄 brainpain: sure, I'll chaperone you two brainpain: ✨ ihatemyguts: result brainpain: arms length, Zachary gotspoons: I feel like I'm on a dating site brainpain: there'd be way more fibros if we were gotspoons: I've never even attempted to date gotspoons: such a minefield brainpain: if you change your mind, I'll get my sister to list off which ones to avoid brainpain: she feeds me a new spooky story weekly gotspoons: see, it's bad enough without the added 'who I am' drama brainpain: get yourself a love interest with more 🚑💊💉 drama than you, that's what I do brainpain: you're the chill one by comparison gotspoons: Rich is still here lurking, you know 🤭 brainpain: he knows what we have is deep + meaningful tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: 👌 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: very serious brainpain: I'm coaching Rosie for her first venture into dating not discussing our lengthy but ultimately doomed love affair tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: doomed because 💀💀 or doomed because someone will join the group with ultimate 🚑💊💉 drama and better hair? brainpain: @Zach with that death clock bs brainpain: doomed cos you'll meet a hot 🤓 at uni brainpain: nobody has better hair than either of us tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Okay then, I won't be pre-offended and call you out on that nonsense brainpain: that isn't a promise that you'll still have time for me brainpain: we're all waiting, Rich tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: depends how hot and how nerdy this university girl is, of course brainpain: Profess your undying love for me or get out, honestly tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: 😏 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Rosie will shut it down again brainpain: 😉 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: She's a hater 💔 gotspoons: 😱 Rich! gotspoons: I'm very supportive brainpain: LOL gotspoons: 😥 gotspoons: I love love brainpain: you're a 🧸 brainpain: I love you, Rosemary brainpain: feel free to ignore my husband gotspoons: I ❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜 you all too gotspoons: even if you test my nerves sometimes, it's only in a good way 😅 tigerbalm: So, if one of us had  a 'normal' crush, would that be doomed? tigerbalm: asking for a friend 😳 gotspoons: OF COURSE NOT gotspoons: you're beautiful gotspoons: spill spill! tigerbalm: there isn't much to say except his running route goes past my house tigerbalm: we've 👋 at each other but no conversation has happened gotspoons: HOW EXCITING ihatemyguts: You've gotta talk to him ihatemyguts: such a meet-cute tigerbalm: I have no idea what I would say ihatemyguts: a hello to go with the 👋 to start ihatemyguts: you'll know what to do tigerbalm: a 'how are you?' to follow but what then? ihatemyguts: something like...you run this route often? ihatemyguts: do you run anywhere else? ihatemyguts: are you single? tigerbalm: 🐱 gotspoons: Oh! gotspoons: What does he look like? gotspoons: Can you take a picture? gotspoons: No, perhaps not gotspoons: I've got snap happy now 😅 tigerbalm: I'll try if I can do it without anyone else noticing tigerbalm: it's okay if my cat judges me, but no humans tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I cannot officially endorse this behaviour, ladies tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: but I'm sure he would be very flattered and consider himself lucky, Robyn tigerbalm: Oh Rich, you're such a big softie 😸 brainpain: LMAO brainpain: forget the boy, I want pics of your cat tigerbalm: [cat pics] 🧡 inandout: that is a potentially judgemental looking moggy, be careful tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: girl or boy? tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: he or she is very distinguished looking, I feel tigerbalm: me & my mum were feeling outnumbered, so she got adopted too tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: fight the power ✊ tigerbalm: I have rabbits too but they would probably encourage me, they're pretty naughty tigerbalm: for fairness tigerbalm: [rabbit pics] brainpain: I had 🐭🐭 as a kid brainpain: LOVED those critters brainpain: [picture of kiddo Lauren with mice on her shoulders] ihatemyguts: I wish I was allowed pets with fur ihatemyguts: scales only inandout: I'm not either inandout: my brother's allergic ihatemyguts: maybe we have the same brother ihatemyguts: slightly concerned now inandout: yours isn't as old as mine, we know that inandout: unless some kind of freaky time loop or something has happened ihatemyguts: I'm you in a parallel universe inandout: before I agree to co-sign, do you have any pets with scales? ihatemyguts: 🐉 🐲 inandout: cool inandout: I accept our parallel lives ihatemyguts: [pics of your dragons 'cos probably have one each lowkey] inandout: if I'm the only petless one in the "core" I will have to hang my head ihatemyguts: you can have joint custody ihatemyguts: don't worry inandout: pet names + a pet share? What a day ihatemyguts: v generous inandout: I'm making that discovery ihatemyguts: 🎁🔍 inandout: I wish we were doing a treasure hunt inandout: that's gonna be date 4 ihatemyguts: challenge accepted ihatemyguts: you gotta find the treasure outside then rehide it though ihatemyguts: more fun inandout: rules accepted ihatemyguts: if you happen to find 💰💎🏺🧭🔮🧿📿 then we'll bury it inandout: what happens if I find a 🗝? ihatemyguts: #5 finding the 🚪 or 🔓 it fits brainpain: Wait, how many dates am I chaperoning you 👶🤓s for? brainpain: gotta find a ✏️ to write this down ihatemyguts: technically, Zach wants to wait 'til he's not 🔞 ihatemyguts: unless you're well dedicated to protect and serve ihatemyguts: also plenty of time to lose that 📄 inandout: don't listen to her, the first date is Robbie's party and we've all 📅 ihatemyguts: might be a double date ihatemyguts: 💃🏃 tigerbalm: I'm so happy that you're both coming! tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Of course they're not missing the event of the season tigerbalm: 😸😺 tigerbalm: I better plan some more tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: It is your forte tigerbalm: compliments are yours tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and hair tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: humility, less so brainpain: I can vouch for that being why we're soulmates tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: it's the way you can dominate a conversation tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: like a girl with something to say brainpain: 😏 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Tease brainpain: you'd be into it if I were tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: now she speaks 🤫 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: If Rosie isn't sleeping she'll be 😖 brainpain: I know how to behave, you're the bad influence here tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Gladly take that reputation tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: much worse could be said about me brainpain: catch that 2nd wave of drama when the haters log back in tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I hope so brainpain: only cos you missed the kick off tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Not taking politics for nothing brainpain: they can 🔫 @ me if it means you get your 🎓 babe tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: long as I can 🛡 without being fibro about it brainpain: you did tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: 👍 gotspoons: I was thinking gotspoons: maybe if we make more boards for specific topics, that would be better? gotspoons: then the chat could be just that, a casual chat that isn't necessarily disability related but us related, as people gotspoons: what do you guys think? brainpain: I'm in inandout: me too inandout: I was gonna make a similar suggestion but it was my last idea that started everything earlier gotspoons: It's not your fault, Zach gotspoons: I just need to do some admin, update the site tigerbalm: I can help if you need any gotspoons: Thanks, Robbie

[ruminativerabbi]

Bouncing Back

We human beings are essentially adaptable creatures, but we don’t think of ourselves that way most of the time. In fact, just the opposite is how we usually see ourselves: as creatures of habit so used to our ways that it takes a seismic shift in the environment to move us into new modes of behavior or attitude. But then, when there is simply no alternative and we suddenly do have to adapt, we somehow manage it nevertheless. We all exemplified that ability in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy back in 2012, for example, when so many of us were suddenly without electric power not for minutes or hours but—for many of us—for almost two weeks. Somehow, we figured it out. We cooked on disposable hibachis in the backyard. We read by flashlight or by candlelight. We drove into Queens to retrieve our email in the first public library we passed that had wi-fi available to the public. For the first day or two, it was challenging and almost exciting to figure out how to survive. By day three, not so much. A week later, we had all had enough. But my point for today is not really how adaptive we were, but how fleeting all those changes proved to be: as soon as the power went back on, no one was interested in frying eggs in the backyard or in reading in bed at night by candlelight. It was real change, real adaptation. But it didn’t last: as soon as the power went back on, we all went immediately back to where we had been before the storm hit.

When the COVID crisis was just upon us, I imagined at first that this would be like that, that the coronavirus would be the viral version of Sandy. And, indeed, in the beginning, that was exactly how it seemed. We struggled for a while to figure out how to get things done. And then, when we really were out of eggs and toilet paper (and not in that order for most of us), we adapted because we simply had to. We figured out how make face masks out of t-shirts. We figured out how to order groceries, toiletries, and prescription drugs online. We figured out how to get our daily exercise without a gym to drive to or a public pool to swim in. Houses of worship learned how to conduct their services on zoom platforms. Teachers of all sorts, myself included, figured out how to teach on those same zoom platforms. Here and there, the cloud even showed a bit of silver lining as people conducting zoomed seder meals suddenly realized that they could invite relatives from all over the country, even from all around the world, who would otherwise never have been able even to consider coming. Instead of declining, participation in daily worship actually increased as the possibility of coming to minyan in the morning without having actually to go outside in the cold beckoned to non-regular worshipers and inspired them to embrace daily prayer in a way that they either never had or at least hadn’t for a long time. So, because we had to, we adapted quickly and—speaking of our life at Shelter Rock specifically—almost remarkably efficiently and effectively.

Will things just go back to normal when this is all over? In 2012, that’s exactly what happened when the power went back on. But I don’t see that happening this time ’round. Indeed, what I’ve been sensing just recently is that we are being altered by this experience in ways that will remain with us long after the crisis passes, and that that is going to be true in many different settings. All sorts of businesses currently conducting business from their employees’ homes will wonder why—given that they have no walk-in trade anyway—they bother paying all that rent to have a central office in the first place. Houses of worship that are attracting more, not fewer, people to worship will wonder what the benefit would be in going back to the previous mode of operation. Schools too will be prompted to wonder if their entire operations couldn’t be streamlined—and made dramatically less expensive to operate—by making off-site learning the rule rather than the exception. True, there’s no way to conduct a choir on the zoom platform. And neither would it be possible to teach lab-based science classes to people with no physical access to the kind of equipment in well-stocked labs. But listening to lectures about history or literature, or learning a language—it seems less obvious that these couldn’t be conducted with as much success via distance learning as when teacher and pupils are all in the same physical space.

At the core of the issue is not really the question of ease, however, but one of human nature. And that is my real topic for today.

Jewish tradition is crystal-clear about the need for a minyan—a prayer quorum of ten—if worship is to take place in a non-abbreviated way that reflects the sanctity of the undertaking fully and meaningfully. The reason given in classical sources for that specific number—or, for that matter, for there being a number at all—is, however, not particularly satisfying. The Mishnah offers a list of all the parts of regular worship that require a quorum of ten. The Talmud then responds by asking where that rule came from and then by offering an answer to its own question in the form of a tradition taught by Rabbi Chiyya bar Abba in the name of Rabbi Yochanan, one of the great rabbis of the talmudic era, according to whom the requirement derives from a verse from Leviticus 22 that features the statement that God, by divine nature, seeks to become sanctified amidst the people, which the rabbi took to imply that all the most sacred parts of the service—the parts that lead to the name of God formally and publicly being sanctified—may only be undertaken in the presence of a quorum, of a minyan. The Talmud finds that assertion obscure and wonders aloud how that verse can possibly lead to that conclusion. It’s an excellent question, but most moderns will find the answer somewhere between obscure and unsatisfying. The verse from Leviticus says that God will be sanctified amidst the children of Israel. And a different verse uses that same word, amidst, when—in telling the story of the desert rebellion of Korach—God is cited as telling Moses and Aaron to separate themselves from amidst the congregation of rebels so that they will not suffer their fate. And then, because the word “congregation” had been used just a few chapters earlier to refer specifically to the ten spies Moses sent out to reconnoiter the land and who later opposed Caleb and Joshua and encouraged the people to give up any hope of ever establishing themselves in the Land of Israel—that, the Talmud triumphantly concludes, is why we need ten people to constitute a minyan.

I first learned that passage of Talmud when I was a student at JTS more than forty years ago. It didn’t seem too convincing to me then. It still doesn’t. The whole notion that that kind of elaborate word play can be used to develop actual laws that affect real people in the course of their daily lives is not something I would particularly want to defend in public. Mustn’t there be some other reason for needing a physically real, extant, present community of people in the same place to worship fully and meaningfully?

The journey to spiritual fulfillment is a journey each of us takes alone. The ancient model has to do with the pilgrimage to Jerusalem that the Torah ordains be undertaken three times a year: each pilgrim is best imagined traveling as a party of one to commune with the one God, as a solo traveler making personal progress, yes, to the glimmering real city in the distance, but also to a private Jerusalem in which the two—the Israelite and the fully present God of Israel—will henceforth be able to dwell in each other’s presence even after the former returns home and resumes normal, everyday life. It is, in fact, in that specific way that the pilgrimage was deemed to be a transformational experience and not merely a task to be undertaken thrice annually.

That is not the full story, however. Each pilgrim following a private, wholly idiosyncratic path towards a personal destiny in God was also a traveler moving forward with countless others on the real road to the real Jerusalem, the actual city that in ancient times housed the actual Temple in which God was imaged to have settled the divine name and thus at least in some sense to have become approachable and knowable. And that image of people pursuing their personal redemptive moment fully alone, but also in the company of countless others attempting to do the same thing along the same path—that is the model for worship in our day that serves as the equivalent of the pilgrimages undertaken thousands of years ago to the Holy City. In my mind, in fact, it is that specific concept of being alone together that this whole zoom-worship experience has taught me to value in a way that I hadn’t really previously.

I like joining our zoom­-minyan each morning and evening. (Readers who haven’t tried it out are welcome to enter through the Shelter Rock website at www.srjc.org. Morning worship is at 7:30 from Sunday through Friday; evenings are at 8 PM Sunday though Thursday.) I too like the idea of not having to go out into the cold when it’s blustery and freezing outside! But there is something about the physical presence of others traveling the same road to the same golden city wholly on their own but also in the same space I myself am occupying that I find very satisfying, and that no virtual community will ever be able wholly successfully to recreate.

In our modern world, aloneness—equated by many with loneliness—is rarely a sought-after thing. The books about aloneness that I’ve written about in this space over the years—Thoreau’s Walden; Admiral Byrd’s terrific Alone, his deeply affecting account of his time spent totally on his own in Antarctica for several months in 1934; Clark Moustakas’s many works on the topic including particularly his final work, Loneliness, Creativity, and Love—these are all about the way that image of being a lonely pilgrim on a personal journey to redemption can work in the secular context. In the spiritual one, though, the image is of a room of people together in the same space as each pursues his or her personal path forward, lonely (because the spiritual quest is by its nature a lonely one) and also not lonely (because the room is filled with friendly, encouraging faces, some of whom the worshiper has been davening with for decades). And that is why life on the zoom platform, for all it has to recommend it, will never replace a real-life minyan of people lifting their hearts in prayer to God as individuals in the company of others who, together and alone, are at the very same time also progressing towards their private Jerusalems along the dusty byways of ancient Israel…and also in the context of real life as it is lived in the bosom of a community of caring friends.