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#my activity is probably going to get even worse
withahappyrefrain · 2 days
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for bradley and birdie! but i feel like he’s the one who doesn’t like scary movies 🤭
purposely suggesting a horror movie (even though they know they themselves hate horror movies) just so they have an excuse to cuddle up for the night
A chance to combine my love of horror movies with Bradley & Birdie? Don't have to tell me twice!
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"Whatcha wanna watch?" Bradley's mustache tickles your cheek, then your nose when his lips move to kiss you there.
"Is it my pick tonight?" You giggled, fingers gripping the cable knit sweater that currently adorned his body.
"Sure is, got full reign Birdie." His words give you pause. Full reign? Did that mean-
"What's that horror movie you always go on about?" Bradley confirms, as if he could read your mind. He couldn't lie, your raised eyebrows kinda gave it away.
"You mean Hereditary? You would be okay watching that?"
Bradley nuzzles against your body, his head laying against your chest, your fingers toying with his sun kissed hair as he nodded.
"If it means I get to lay like this, absolutely," Bradley's words are genuine, so you grab the remote to find the chosen movie.
"This movie isn't that scary. It's creepy, but it's not scary." Bradley has now put all his body weight on you, like a mustached weighted blanket. Your fingers were idly scratching his scalp with your nails. If Bradley was a cat, he would absolutely be purring.
You could only chuckle, having seen the film over a dozen times, "Famous last words Roo."
"Like the kid is creepy and clearly grandma is haunting Toni Collete." so he had been paying attention.
"It's a slow burn, that's all I'll say," was your final warning. If it weren't for Bradley loving wrapping his arms around you, you would have been able to adopt a more serious tone. But how could you when he kept trying to get as close to you as physically possible?
Bradley shrugged. He was active duty in the Navy. Horror movies weren't his thing, mainly because he always thought he had seen enough in his lifetime.
"Birdie, what the absolute fuck?" You simply giggle, a stark juxtaposition to the image of a decaying head on the screen.
"It only gets worse," your tone was bright and happy, not matching the words at all.
"This is your favorite? You're sick, you know that? Might have to send you away," he rests his chin on your chest, looking directly at you with a lovesick expression.
"Oh, I one hundred percent would have been sent to the sea side for hysteria in the early nineteen hundreds," you grab a piece of popcorn, popping it into your mouth, "I think we should bring that treatment back. Going to the beach would probably calm me down, especially if you're playing football there."
Bradley scoffs, mocked objection lacing his words, "You really can't stop sexualizing your old man, can you?"
"It's better than making grandpa jokes. I still can't believe you were too old during the Naked Brothers Band era," you roll your eyes, although a smittened smile remains on your face.
"And I still can't believe a prime television network named a show that. So like, how freaky does this get?" There's thinly veiled concern in his question.
"Oh, we haven't even reached the tip of the iceberg," you pause, "Just let me know if it gets too much. We can watch something else, like Airplane or-"
Bradley shooks his head, "No, this is an important movie to you, I wanna watch."
It's then you realize that Bradley isn't in it for the spooks, or those Pillsbury ghost cookies (though they are a treat). No, he was sitting through this movie to be with you, to hold you.
It almost made you want to stop the movie before it got to the fucked up part.
Almost.
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rinnokanojo · 3 days
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horror movies... [itoshi rin x reader]
★ in which rin watches a horror film with his new gf for the first time (aka justice for cinnamoroll). ★
(not proofread)
"to be honest, rin, i hate horror movies." you looked over sheepishly to your boyfriend of a few months, who, to the untrained eye, seemingly made no change to his stoic facial expression. but you could see the slight downturn of his cheeks, his eyes stilling in disappointment. though the two of you hadn't been dating long, and there was still a lot to learn about each other, you prided yourself in being able to notice even the subtle changes in rin's expression. seeing him with this look on his face made you flail desperately to fix the situation.
"b-but i don't mind watching one! we watched a film of my choice, it's only fair we watch one of yours now."
you and rin were having a movie night. the couch in your apartment was decked out in blankets and cushions, and, most importantly, the oversized cinnamoroll plushie rin had won you on your first date to the arcade. snacks and popcorn lay on the coffee table in front of you, and were half-eaten or discarded, for the sake of not ruining your appetite for dinner (rin was meticulous about that sort of thing, and you love him for it). this was your first movie night in a few months, owing to the busy schedules of both you and your footballer boyfriend, so you were eager to make it perfect. you had just finished watching Pride and Prejudice, one of your favourites.
you were sat directly next to rin, huddled under the same blanket and thighs touching, but pointedly not cuddling. the both of you were relatively new to relationships, and while you have cuddled before, you were conscious of cuddling him too close or too much. you'd like to think you know rin well, very well, better than others. but that didn't mean you knew when he was completely comfortable with physical affection. for one thing, he rarely initiated it, opting for tight hugs and not much else. though you loved physical affection, you didn't want to make rin uncomfortable.
"we don't have to watch this, you know." rin starts, "it's not a big deal."
"yes, we do! i want to watch the things you like, rin." you say brightly, turning to the side to smile up at him. he looks at you, again with a somewhat blank expression, but the tinge of red on his ears reassures you that your message was received. he huffs slightly, pressing play and bringing the just-delivered box of pizza to his lap, offering you the first slice.
"i'm still surprised you agreed to get pizza," you laugh, holding the slice delicately with your hands, "what about your protein goals?"
"one day off will do no harm."
the film had started, but you, with the ever active brain, began to feel anxious. one of the main things, or perhaps the only thing, you dislike about horror films are the jumpscares. you were incredibly easy to scare, and jumpscares had your heart pounding and your body airborne. it wasn't a fun feeling, and the scary storylines of horror films made it even worse. the last time you watched a horror film, the ghosts would be the only thing you could see when you closed your eyes (and, consequently, you couldn't go to sleep properly for a few days after watching). you would probably have to deal with not being able to sleep for the next few days again, but that was well worth it to watch rin's favourite film.
there was one thing, you think, that might help dealing with the scares of the horror film playing in front of you right now, and that would be if you could cuddle up to your boyfriend and hide your face in his strong chest. rin had a special talent for making you feel safe without trying, just by putting his arms around you. you start to daydream about being scooped up into rin's arms, him telling you that 'you're fine, you're safe' and 'it's just a movie'. but you snap out of it easily, scolding yourself for being too presumptuous. if rin wanted to cuddle, he would have initiated it himself. having finished your pizza, you grip onto your cinnamoroll plushie instead, bracing yourself for the jumpscares in the film.
rin, on the other hand, has not been able to concentrate since he first pressed play. he had been watching you out of the the corner of his eye, smushing your cute, round cheek against the oversized plushie in your arms. you were so cute, he thought, with your hair loose, falling gracefully over your shoulders. your nose was slightly scrunched, probably in anticipation of a jumpscare, and rin thought it was the most adorable thing ever. the pajamas you had on were fluffy, making you look like a plushie in your own right. you looked so...huggable. there was an odd feeling in rin's stomach, a weird churning, at the sight of you cuddling something. something other than him, perhaps? he sighed quietly, and brushed it off as being due to the greasy pizza he had just eaten. maybe one day off can do harm.
"AAH!" you screamed, as the murderer in the film appeared out of nowhere behind the main character's mother (she was almost certainly going to die now). you gripped onto cinnamoroll for dear life, squeezing your eyes shut and burying you face into one his ears. at the same time, rin gasped and reached out for you instinctively, hesitating once his hand reached your shoulder. he contemplated something, thoughts whirring as he slowly recoiled his arm, eyes fixated on your scared form. you looked back at him, smiling apologetically for your loud scream.
"sorry, rin. i'm so sorry. gosh, how embarassing, haha." rin frowned at your words, partly because you had nothing to be sorry for, and partly because you were still cuddling that damn plushie.
"it's...fine. are you okay?"
"yeah, i'm oka-AAAH!" the father had just now been murdered also. why was everyone dying in this film? you began whimpering slightly, squeezing poor cinnamoroll that it looked like it might explode. rin frowned deeply, and he huffed loudly as he turned from you back to the tv screen. you looked over at him questioningly as he grumbled under his breath.
"rin? is something wrong? oh, am i being too loud? i'm sorry, i'll try not to scr-"
"that's not it. it's fine, don't worry."
"what's the matter then?"
you were now turned fully towards rin as he diligently faced the tv, not being able to look you in the eye in fear of choking up. stealing a single glance, he huffed again at the sight of that stupid white dog still snuggled tightly within your arms. he made eye contact with cinnamoroll, scolding himself at the fact that he was jealous over a damn plushie.
"y'know...if you get scared...we can.." he trailed off, and now you were even more curious as to what was wrong with your boyfriend. was he annoyed at you getting scared? no, he did say that wasn't it. was he going to suggest to turn the movie off? maybe he thought you weren't having fun.
"don't worry about me rin! i want to watch this film with you - you said it's one of your favourites. don't turn it off because of me!"
and there you go again, with that blinding smile and that sparkle in your eyes. rin felt weak, the churning feeling in his stomach not ceasing. he coughed and turned away, cheeks burning furiously. after he didn't respond, you looked back up at him and blinked inquisitively.
the sounds of suspense could be heard from the tv screen, making you gasp softly and snap your head back to the movie, before burying your head back into the plushie. rin's frown deepened. this is so stupid.
in an instant, the cinnamoroll plushie was pried from your hands and tossed to the other side of the couch. you mouth opened in an 'o', watching wordlessly as rin threw your plushie, turning back to you with determination in his eyes.
"rin? what–oh–"
he took a breath, then hooked his arm under your knees, wrapping his other arm around your shoulders. in one fell swoop, you were hoisted onto rin's leg, hands landing onto his chest, all the while your bewildered expression stuck on his ever-stoic face.
though his eyebrows were furrowed, his cheeks were a soft pink, and his eyes held a gentle look in them, as if they were asking, pleading you to lean on him. "if you get scared, i'll hold you. you don't need that plushie." he says in a low, soft tone.
you smiled, your blush matching his. keeping your hands firmly on his chest, you buried yourself deeper as he rearranged the blanket atop of you both.
and when the next jumpscare made its way onto the screen, you screamed unapologetically, burying your face into rin's chest while he soothingly rubbed your back. a ghost of a smile played on his lips on account of how cute you looked in that moment.
"it's okay, you're okay...i'm here." he whispered.
"thanks, rin."
he squeezes you reassuringly, taking one last look of victory at the forgotten cinnamoroll plushie.
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thebramblewood · 3 days
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this is in a similar vein to an ask you got recently but do you have any tips for those who are interested in sims 4 (or even other games like ts3 and ts2) storytelling? I write fanfiction but I think making sims 4 stories could be a fun venture. Anyway, thank you for your time! I love your stories so very much they're literally my hyperfixation!
Well, that makes two of us because it's literally my hyperfixation. I think I've shared bits of advice before, so some of this might sound familiar, but here are some things I think are important to remember (and I tried to be concise, I swear).
Write the story you want to write. Obviously, it's a great feeling when something takes off and people get invested. But if you pursue an idea only because you think Simblr will like it, you probably won't be inspired for long and it'll probably show. I've been very lucky with my story, but it didn't blow up overnight. Early on, I was thrilled to get double digit notes or one reblog or comment and was admittedly disappointed when I put a lot of effort into something and nobody seemed to notice. But I kept going because I was obsessed and wanted to see it through, and that's more true now than ever.
Start with low stakes and allow yourself to evolve. Before I was on Simblr, I made Sims stories with no poses or visual enhancements or fancy editing. I wrote them for myself, and I loved every minute of it, but they also gave me a solid foundation for the kind of storytelling I do now. Even after starting this blog, I eased myself into it. I learned how to use poses and Reshade, then moved on to more advanced editing techniques, then moved on to teaching myself to make poses and very basic CC. If you try to learn it all at once, you're more likely to give up because you're overwhelmed. Take your time and make peace with the fact that perfection isn't possible. Everyone's always learning!
Take advantage of the fact that Sims is a game. Even though I've been a creative writer for most of my life, I don't come up with fully-fleshed, elaborate Sims stories from scratch. It started off with my legacy and not wanting every generation to feel the same. I thought about gameplay I hadn't experienced yet and centered each generation's story around that. Even with HZID, I just wanted to make and play with vampires! That's it! Initially, I used a lot of gameplay to convey Helena's college experiences, and I still try to incorporate it when I can. It can really be a great base to spark your creativity if you don't know where to start.
Don't have a life outside your story. I'm joking. Kind of. I'm not a very social person and I don't like leaving my house if I don't have to. This leaves me with a lot of time for working on story things. Honestly, I could probably stand to work on it less. But for better or worse, I'm doing story-related things most nights and weekends, and even if I'm not doing anything, I'm thinking about it. It's probably mental illness, but we'll just call it passion. At the same time, it's also important to take breaks! If you're feeling burnt out, step away for a while. If you can't make yourself step away completely (raises hand), just edit the script or spin your blorbos around in CAS or something rather than going straight for posing a scene.
Follow and interact with other storytellers. This is probably the most important thing, and as someone who struggles with social anxiety it was the hardest for me to do. But I try to make a point of keeping up with other stories, commenting, and reblogging. Not only will the amazing talent of other writers inspire you, but you're building meaningful connections that make them more likely to want to interact with your story. There's no denying it feels amazing to watch your audience grow. But no one's going to see you if you don't make an effort to be seen, as scary as it can be. So try to be active in the community and support other storytellers the way you want to be supported!
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Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad Activity Report
Part 1
(As I mentioned before, all of this was retrieved and translated from the P3 Club Book)
4/6 (Mon) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo
It's Kirijo...
Today is April 6th... No, it's already past midnight. So, to be precise, it's the early hours of the 7th. A new member has arrived at Iwatodai dorm. He is a boy who seems a little quiet, but exudes a mysterious air about him.
Yes, to use a cliché phrase, he has that kind of aura that makes you feel like there is something shining there.
The Chairman had told us about his "potential" beforehand, but to be able to walk the whole way from the station to the dormitory without getting flustered during the Dark Hour... Marvelous! I'm really surprised!
It seems that he has not yet Awakened, but I am sure that he will be a great asset to our team. Today may be a fateful day for us.
Hehe... I seem to be in a surprisingly good mood. Let's hope that my hunch is correct and that I'll finally be able to put an end to my sadness of the past 10 years.
4/7 (Tue) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba
Well, it's Takeba. There are no club activities today. Oh, I guess escorting the transfer student who arrived last night to school this morning counted as part of the activities. He is, to put it nicely, "calm and collected," but from my perspective, he's way more than cool, and I don't know what he's thinking... well, you shouldn't say anything bad without knowing the facts.
Also, that idiot Junpei Iori from my class is getting a little too close to the new transfer student, so I made sure to tell him not to mention the Dark Hour thing. That's it. This is Takeba.
4/8 (Wed) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada
Following on from last night, I was on a shadow patrol again tonight. The patrol area was the main street from Iwatodai Station to Moonlight Bridge.
Since the beginning of this month, there have been more and more rumors about shadows, but contrary to expectations, there are not many of them. To be honest, it's not enough.
I guess we have no choice but to build up our fighting power as soon as possible and begin our assault on that dreaded tower, Tartarus. They'll be gathering there. It should be a more efficient way to proceed with our operations than patrolling in the hopes of a chance encounter. Well, now is the time to lie low...
Ah, that's right. Tonight I found an unexpected find. A detailed report will be provided at a later date.
It's unclear whether it will be an effective fighting force, but it looks like it could be interesting in many ways.
Oh, and a message from Takeba to Ikutsuki-san: "It's embarrassing, so please stop the indiscriminate attacks of puns."
4/9 (Thu) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo
It's Kirijo. During the Dark Hour, we were attacked by a large Shadow unlike any we had seen before.
The Arcana was the Fool.
For more details, please see the attached report.
…Today's report may be a little too brief, but due to a series of shocking events, I'll have to be forgiven.
Above all, he is a newbie... He seems to be a little out of control, but he awakened to two Persona at the same time.
What if...
Anyway, the confusion on this matter has subsided.
I will provide a written report as soon as possible.
Oh, and there was some damage to the exterior walls and windows of the dormitory, but the overall damage seems to be minor. We plan to place an order for repairs with a contractor from our group as early as tomorrow.
4/10 (Fri) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada
The damage caused by the large Shadow last night was greater than expected. Mitsuru said it wasn't a big deal, but it was a big burden on Takeba, as it was her first real fight. She's probably not going to be able to use her Evoker for a few days, especially due to mental fatigue.
The damage to the dormitory itself was even worse than it appeared, with several optical fiber cables for the internet broken.
Also, the newbie collapsed after the battle and remains unconscious. It seems that the cause was excessive mental concentration in order to control his Persona, but it is unclear when he will return.
It's true... I can't help it. I'll fight for anyone who can't fight for themselves... Hey, Mitsuru, what's with you all of a sudden... Whoa, wait a second...
(Some loud bang sound)
...Additional information from Kirijo. Akihiko has been diagnosed with a broken rib and will need one month to fully recover. For the time being, the Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad will be effectively suspended.
...Correction: Akihiko has suffered a head injury. An additional half month will be added to the time until he is fully recovered. That's all.
4/11 (Sat) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba
Uh, this is Takeba.
Dark Hour activities will be suspended for a while, but today I went to visit our new member, so I thought I'd let you know.
He's still unconscious, but the doctor said he's in good health.
From what I saw, his complexion was good and he had regained consciousness.
I think he might have gained weight from all the infusions. I'm a little worried, so I'll go and check on him again tomorrow at noon.
Maybe he will be cured completely.
4/12 (Sun) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba
Well, it's Takeba for the second day in a row.
Kirijo-senpai is out today, having gone to the Kirijo Group headquarters to report on the recent large Shadow incident. Sanada-senpai was about to go out for some personal training when he was spotted by Kirijo-senpai, who gave him a cold shoulder... well, not metaphorically, but more like, physically.
Oh, and I believe Ikutsuki must be feeling lonely without a supervisor...to be honest, it's painful. I hope the new guy returns as soon as possible. That's all from Takeba. Phew.
4/13 (Mon) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada
As for the cleanup of the large shadow from the other day, it seems that it has finally come to an end, according to Mitsuru's report yesterday.
The rest is up to the Chairman and the specialist team. We just need to focus on defeating the shadows. That being said, we are currently overwhelmingly underpowered... Anyways, patience makes perfect, so we'll just have to be patient for a while.
That's right. Today at school, the Student Council election was held. Mitsuru was running for president, and it seems likely that she will win. The results will be announced at tomorrow's morning assembly, but should I start thinking about what to say to congratulate her?
4/14 (Tue) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo
It's Kirijo.
There is nothing to report from the Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad today. The new recruit hasn't regained consciousness yet. I wonder if he'll be okay...
Also, I apologize for talking about my personal matters, but as a result of the Student Council elections held yesterday, I have been officially appointed as student council president, starting today.
Let me report on it.
I have a lot of things to do this week to take over the Student Council. However, I am confident that I can achieve good results by utilizing the experience I gained as a Student Council member from my first year.
I hope that with this, I can be more confident in defeating shadows as well...
No... that's not it. That's not it. Why would I have confidence in the Student Council, in school life? My life may not be in danger, but the future can't be perfect either...
I may have been... a bit complacent.
I'm grateful for this activity report. Just having to say it out loud and record it is a lot easier than thinking alone.
It teaches you things that you would not notice on your own.
Thinking about it, I've always been told that I'm taking on too much on my own. Akihiko often lectures me about this.
Well, I'll make sure to keep this in mind when I deliver my inaugural address next week.
4/15 (Wed) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba
Uh, this is Takeba.
Today is a day off for the Archery Club, so I went to Tatsumi Memorial Hospital again. …He is still unconscious, so I'm starting to get worried.
The other day, I was asked to read a report about his upbringing, and I did, but it was pretty sad that he doesn't have any family to help him if something happens.
It's pretty tough without someone...
I really hope he gets better soon.
That's all from Takeba.
Oh, that's right. I forgot to mention it, but congratulations to Kirijo-senpai on being appointed president.
4/16 (Thu) - Reporter: Shuji Ikutsuki
…This is Ikutsuki.
It seems like everyone in SEES has been pushing themselves too hard lately, so I've decided to let them go to bed early tonight. There's nothing of note to report regarding shadows.
It's really nerve-wracking to record in front of a microphone in this empty space.
I was so nervous that I had to go to the bathroom...
When recording, that is, when inputting sound, going to the toilet is inevitable, just kidding...
Ah, if no one listens to me, it's not worth it.
4/17 (Fri) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba
It's Takeba! Well, he's finally woken up! According to the doctor in charge, he's in good health. He'll still be staying in the hospital tonight just to be safe, but starting tomorrow, he'll be fine to go to school.
Also, the Chairman said that he will finally tell him about SEES tomorrow.
I'm a little worried about whether he'll understand SEES' activities because he's a bit shy. Well, I can't force him, so it can't be helped, but if he joins, I think he'll be very reliable. I'll try not to get my hopes up too much and wait for tomorrow. This is Takeba.
4/18 (Sat) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo
Good news! The new guy has been officially accepted into SEES.
…Honestly, even though it was an accident, I put him in a life-threatening situation, so I thought it was inevitable that he would refuse, but he seems to have a more flexible way of thinking than I had imagined. I can expect him to be an even more valuable asset in the future.
Oh, and by the way... I may have been a little too strict during the recruitment meeting. Sorry, Akihiko.
However, I need you to act a little like an injured person and exercise more restraint.
I don't want anyone to be forced to miss out...any more than this.
4/19 (Sun) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada
The new recruit I picked up during the recent Dark Hour, whose situation had been left unresolved due to the large Shadow attack incident, is finally being allowed to move into the dorms.
The new recruit's name is Junpei Iori.
His detailed information should have been submitted separately, but he was in the same class as Takeba and the transfer student.
I had planned to keep it a secret until the last minute and surprise him, but Takeba's reaction when he moved into the dorm was better than I expected, and it was quite fun. If he continues like that, I think he'll fit in with the group quickly and do well.
He has a unique talent for creating a good mood, and in a sense, this is an advantage that surpasses his Persona abilities.
He has a unique talent for creating a good mood, and in my opinion, this is an advantage that surpasses his Persona abilities. Maybe I should follow his example.
And... finally, starting tomorrow, we plan to begin our search for Tartarus. Unfortunately, it seems Mitsuru won't allow me to join in, but even so... it's finally here...
4/20 (Mon) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba
Uh, this is Takeba.
Today was my first time in Tartarus...and I'm kind of tired from all sorts of things...
But I'll try my best.
No, I think I can do my best.
The field leader, the transfer student, is amazing. I have my own goals, but I don't really know much about them.
I know I shouldn't rely on him, but it still seems like he could be relied on.
Now... if only we could do something about Junpei's stupidity, it would be fantastic.
Well, it's short, but I'm going to sleep now. This is Takeba.
4/21 (Tue) - Reporter: Junpei Iori
…Ah, ah...Is the sound properly? Ahem.
Hey, I'm Junpei Iori, a promising new recruit. Well, this is my first report. ...What should I talk about? The activities that seem to be part of SEES are, ah, I was told by Sanada-senpai to go to the Tatsumi East Police Station with the transfer student to buy weapons.
But if you think about it, that's just black market sales, isn't it? Is that okay?
I heard something on TV, but the number of Lost people, shadow victims, is increasing.
Well, that's where we come in... but it's hard to get used to the Evoker.
I don't think it's right. Isn't it possible to make it a more gentle design?
And then... Oh, by the way, Kirijo-senpai's inaugural speech as president was really powerful. I didn't really understand it though.
Is that it? Yes, it's all over.
SEES Members Talk!
Mitsuru: In addition to directing the daily attack on Tartarus, he is also involved in student council activities... right, he is also in the sports club.
Fuuka: Although he doesn't go every day, he participates in the same cultural club as me. The club president seems to think highly of him.
Yukari: So what was it called, that club thing... you do that too, right? Come to think of it, it's a really hard schedule.
Mitsuru: Even when he comes to school, he sometimes looks pretty pale. I wonder if he is tired after all. I am worried because he never complains or anything...
Yukari: Sometimes he falls asleep during class so soundly that his eyes roll up, or he goes to Mr. Edogawa's after school.
Fuuka: That's right, and then he takes this very suspicious drug that seems to emit smoke, and looks so happy... It's actually kind of scary how he becomes so refreshed so quickly.
Mitsuru: Sometimes during the Dark Hour he mutters to himself something like "The end is coming..." ...Could it be that he's in quite the dangerous situation...?
Yukari: ...
Fuuka: H-how can I cheer her up? Oh, that's right, how about equipping her with high leg armor and sexy heels!
Mitsuru: Wh...! Yamagishi, don't be so casual about it as if it's someone else's problem.
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tsuwabuki · 2 days
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what if kobeni had a contract with famine?
1. she's the first one to mention starving in the infinity devil trap.
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2. you could hide some foreshadowing under innocuous comments that anyone could make. it's not odd for a poor 20 year old girl to take comfort and enjoyment in tasty food. mentioning the hobby right after 'my devil is a secret' could be nothing, but....
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3. someone on reddit mentioned a possible 'final girl' devil with kobeni which I love but I felt the kitchen knife mention would match better with famine. after all, we see falling devil act as a chef preparing a meal for famine. could expand that to kobeni.
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4. after famine reveals her name at the aquarium, a kobeni bro makes his debut. also if the infinity devil was used by famine here, was it also used by famine the first time we see it?
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5. what we know of famines motivations and context as a horseman translates well to a theory on kobenis abilities. they seem quite powerful when activated so you would need a powerful demon.
5a. ok so my theory. when kobeni is starved of enough good things (family, luck, companionship, safety, bravery, etc), to the point she is fully starved from her humanity, she becomes hyper competent.
you see her fail to reach this state in the hotel due to her clinging to humanity (feels bad about wanting denji dead, for stabbing aki, etc). I think she succeeds in reaching hypercompetence during the rhythm game bit due to being terrified and isolated, it just so happens that the hypercompetence went into playing the rhythm game.
the only other moment where kobenis devil contract ability(ies?) come into play is after her partner gets killed protecting her and she finds out her whole team has been wiped out.
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5b. ok so how does this hyper competence after 'starvation' relate to famine as a devil? well the horsemen act as as symbols and metaphors for humanity/life to triumph over.
we see that supported by both conquest and famine taking the role of nurturing humans to become stronger. you could even make that claim for all devils but this isn't about that.
starving is supposed to trigger humanity's instinct to survive by Doing Whatever It Takes. this fits nicely to how I think kobenis contract functions and why she would accept a nerf on her life like that (and how it plays into mental health, childhood abuse, and how someone could choose permanent(?) self destruction at such a young point of their life).
the fact that we see her devil contract trigger (rhythm game) after she's already left public safety means she's stuck with that contract probably the rest of her life. she wanted to go to college but her neglectful parents forced her to pick between sex work and the equivalent of demon fodder.
and because we don't know anything about her contract, we don't know how much she gave up to have this power 😭 being starved of good luck sounds like a really bad longterm debuff even if you theoretically get really good luck at your most terrified moments.
i lost my train of thought here but I'll add one more tangential thing. fujimoto is showing multiple examples of what childhood abuse and/or lack of a stable life can do to someone and how those systems help, hurt, and trap them. kobeni is an example of something more grounded despite her being comedic relief and I love that contrast with her.
she was forced to join the military due to family pressure and economic situation, could not handle the mental strain and quit with a potential life long disability that could get worse over time. she gets a job at a fast food restaurant and has spent her life so far hopping from one toxic 'family' to another.
anyways. throwing kobeni famine contract into the theory pile
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qiu-yan · 22 hours
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2 and 21 for mdzs please?
sorry for the wait!
choose violence ask game
2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom
in terms of "compelling" arguments, i've got nothing. in terms of bullshit arguments i pulled out of my ass, though....
of course, the easy way out is to argue that jiang cheng is asexual and therefore would never come into sexual contact with anyone. an equally easy way out is to argue that jiang cheng is so rizzless that, even if he wanted to top or bottom, no one would do it with him....that's the easy way out of this question, though.
my own opinion is that, if jiang cheng were attracted to men and/or had a partner who was into pegging, he would have way too much internalized homophobia to give bottoming a try. even if he somehow got over himself enough to admit that he was into men (already impossible), he would still buy into the ancient-greek school of thought on homosexuality, wherein "ackshually it's only gay if you're on the bottom." he would be fully convinced that, if he were to bottom - and worse, if he were to enjoy it - he would become Less Man on an existential level. this would absolutely kill him inside, would make him actively more homophobic than if he were just straight or asexual, and would make him a nightmare for any other man to hook up with.
but of course, the more you adamantly refuse to even consider something - the more you fear something, in other words - the more you end up obsessing over it. if jiang cheng were actually hooking up with men in this scenario (entirely possible because he's like 6ft tall and probably can host because he's rich, which makes him a prime catch in the eyes of like 90% of grindr), he would adamantly refuse to bottom. he'd declare himself a hard top. but would he actually enjoy himself? or would he, as he topped in a lackluster manner whichever men were unfortunate enough to give him a chance, imagine himself in their position - first with disgust, as he told himself he was different than them; then with terror, as he feared that he might one day end up in their position; and then with something else?
because jiang cheng's fear - that he might one day bottom and enjoy it - would quickly mutate into a full-on psychosexual obsession with the concept of bottoming itself. because it's repression king jiang cheng we're talking about, said obsession would eventually become one of those things you're so afraid of that your fear ends up wrapping back around and turning into a fetish. because it's jiang cheng we're talking about, this would then lead to him actually bottoming one day. and then, because it's jiang cheng we're talking about and the universe hates him, he would actually end up enjoying it.
does his mindset change? maybe. or maybe he just becomes Worse.
i feel like i've ended up doing the opposite of answer the question.....sorry.....these are my honest thoughts, though.
21. part of canon you think is overhyped
i'm going to get killed for this, but that's the purpose of this ask game, so i'll be honest....."lan wangji as Love Interest." of course, by this i do not mean to say "lan wangji himself." rather, what i mean is the way in which lan wangji is a "love interest" first and a "character" second. in my view, the story is only really interested in lan wangji as "the guy who loves wei wuxian and is unquestioningly devoted to him," rather than interested in lan wangji as a character in his own right.
of course, the story spills a lot of ink on how much lan wangji loves wei wuxian, how much lan wangji has sacrificed for wei wuxian, how unquestioningly devoted lan wangji is to wei wuxian, and so on. and while this is all true and good, in my view, there are also several other interesting angles in lan wangji's story worth exploring. however, these angles instead seem rather neglected by the story, which appears to only want to discuss "lan wangji's devotion to his One True Love."
some angles i consider to be interesting, and which i felt like went underexplored in canon:
how much of lan wangji's support of wei wuxian is because he believed wei wuxian was right, and how much of it is because he loves wei wuxian and does not want to lose wei wuxian again? where does lan wangji's personal romantic love end and his moral compass begin? the novel equates [standing with wei wuxian] with [being righteous], but it is exceedingly easy to design a situation where the morally righteous path entails sacrificing wei wuxian in some way - how would lan wangji behave in such a situation? if wei wuxian himself had not protected the wen remnants (due to canon divergence or whatever), would lan wangji have spoken up for the wen remnants?
to what degree does lan wangji agree with wei wuxian's actions and consider said actions to be morally justified? comparatively, to what degree does lan wangji consider wei wuxian's actions to be morally questionable, and simply wants to shoulder wei wuxian's sins with him out of love? does lan wangji know and/or believe that wei wuxian killing jin zixuan was a genuine accident? if he does not know, does he care?
what does lan wangji's relationship with his family look like? on one hand, in his failed bid to save wei wuxian, he injured 33 of his own sect's elders, which under confucian principles is a massive wrongdoing. have the injuries of these elders healed? does lan wangji feel guilty? on the other hand, lan wangji's family betrayed both him and the moral principles they espoused, by first nearly whipping lan wangji to death and then joining the first siege of the burial mounds. does lan wangji resent his family for this? does he resent lan xichen and lan qiren, or does he understand that they had argued the punishment down from execution? is that why, after lan xichen's world shattered at the guanyin temple in yunping, lan wangji was able to immediately leave the premises with wei wuxian in tow, without once checking in on his brother?
what does lan wangji think of his late parents? does he want to know why his mother killed his father's teacher, or would he rather not know? does his family keep the knowledge from him, or does he avoid the knowledge himself? what does he think of his father's actions - to him, is his father someone who fell from the path of duty and righteousness for the sake of love, someone who selfishly abandoned his duties and forced his responsibilities onto his younger brother, and/or someone who imprisoned lan wangji's mother against her will and perhaps even forced himself onto her? does lan wangji know whether or not he was conceived consensually? does this bother him?
given the whole history of lan wangji's parents, how does lan wangji view his own, how should i say, sexual interests? lan wangji did once pin down a struggling wei wuxian and forcibly kiss him; would lan wangji make a connection between the nonconsensual nature of this deed and the imprisonment of his mother? furthermore, wang and xian's relationship postcanon seems to have an element of d/s and noncon roleplay to it (which i'm not judging them for, good for them); would that also remind lan wangji of how his father and his father's sect brought about the imprisonment of his mother? or are these two separate things entirely?
in my view, these are all highly interesting aspects of lan wangji's story - and all of these are implied by details given in canon. however, canon shirks discussing these aspects of lan wangji's character in favor of focusing on him as the Male Lead: rather than explore any of these angles, which would further define lan wangji as a person, canon seems far more interested in single-mindedly focusing on how sad lan wangji was that wei wuxian died, how tragic the loss of his One True Love was, and how wholeheartedly happy lan wangji is now that wei wuxian has come back and returns his feelings.
to me, it feels like this guy got sanded down from a "full individual" to a "love interest." it feels to me like the story gives us some details about lan wangji's own life, but then nonetheless insists on reducing him from a person in his own right to a satellite that revolves around wei wuxian (the story's real favorite). because of this, MDZS the novel read as less the wei wuxian and lan wangji story, and more the Wei Wuxian story starring Wei Wuxian, in which lan wangji is a love interest first and a person second.
i forget if i said this before or if i read it from someone else's blog, but it does feel like, if you want to love lan wangji on his own, you have to do a lot of the heavy lifting yourself. or at the very least scrub all the male lead energy off of him first, so that the individual underneath can be revealed.
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I just watched yesterday's vod and i immediately came to tumblr to see the panic and let me tell you, i feel like a bug whos rock was just lifted lmao. They aren't supposed to KNOW!!!!!
Listen, I expect this sort of thing. I expect streamers to eventually get curious, see what they’re fans are up to the the accursed platforms such as tumblr and Ao3.
WHAT I DONT EXPECT IS FOR ONE OF THEM (JEREMY) TO ACTIVELY ENCOURAGE ANOTHER (PLATY) TO READ FANFIC LIVE ON STREAM??? If they ever do a stream where they read fanfic I’m temporarily privating all my works.
Yeah, I’m uh. Definitely okay after last night. I don’t think they got to any of my fics, but I did go to bed after the first few times it was brought up since it was late. If they did read my fics or ever do…… I don’t want to know.
Also, I’m very happy that you all thought to either message this blog or my main, even if you were just curious about PR1! I don’t know when I became the primary spokesperson of this fandom but if I must? I guess so be it lmao
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something about that whole incident must have changed something in my brain chemistry cause my insomnia’s gotten bad again
the past few days i’ve getting to sleep at two or three. kinda sucks i guess, but i don’t really want to resort to taking melatonin again
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sesamenom · 1 month
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apologies for the lack of art lately, i just got new glasses and am still adjusting :(
in the meantime, anyone have thoughts about lomion and tyelpe's relationship in the reverse gondolin au?
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soapkid · 4 months
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ive gotta be real im kind of losing hope for life
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saeshiraw · 1 year
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tired girl hours i’m just ranting bcos i don’t have enough time to cry
#tw rant#studying med is no joke. ik it was gonna be a commitment n that it wasnt gonna be easy n i thought i was prepared but im not#its my passion. i love what im studying and ive dedicated myself to this path but i just. its so hard n i just want to cry. everyday feels#so tiring. morning to night classes. when i get home i have to read 4 chapters MINIMUM n the books are so thick + exams almost everyday#i feel worse knowing there’s this 1 girl in my friend group that cant decide whether she likes me or not. one moment shes complimenting me#n asking where i get my outfits or my nails done or my earrings or whatever then praising me that i probably study the least out of everyone#yet still reach high student rankings but its not that im lazy im just so exhausted n its hard to have motivation... lowkey envy how my#friends study minimum 4 hours a day. we’re all tired n sleep deprived. even taking 30mins to eat makes me feel guilty. cant even watch 1 ep#of an anime bcos ill be thinking about the amount of work to do. and i have sm plans. i wanna be more active and have a healthier lifestyle#but i cant find it in me to wake up every 5am to go to the gym when i just wanna get as much sleep when im lucky to finish my studies today#i also dont see my bestest friends everyday anymore. some of us move to diff unis or some in diff majors. i just miss them so bad it hurts#and i miss the girl i used to be when i still had time and energy to indulge in my hobbies. i miss playing genshin and writing fics#just when i got back to writing and enjoyed it LOVED IT i had to go back to uni. i feel terribly lonely even when im always with people#im afraid ill completely lose grasp of the little things that make me happy bcos the weight of my responsibilities are heavier#im afraid ill be too focused on success again like i was when i was 17 and forget that its okay to relax too but idk#and i wanna meet more people make more friends have new experiences. i wanna feel alive again. and theres sm i wanna talk to or get to know#but im so afraid of people hurting me or disappointing me or people getting to know me only for the friendships to fail or we’ll dislike eac#h other. i wanna date and fall in love again and experience the romance my peers have. i wanna have someone to call my own person but the fe#ar of having someone only to lose them someday scares the hell outta me. im not ready for another heartbreak so i isolate myself and watch#people from afar. uni gives me sm freedom to do everything else and form my own identity but i dont wanna be Perceived. I wanna be heard and#seen n connect with people. but w my curreny state idt i can handle being vulnerable with others. it feels so lonely that the things i want#are out of my rrach but idt i can manage my time to meet new people and make new memories. i console myself by shopping a lot and going to#spas to relax yet i still find it hard to sleep. im afraid im wasting my time. im not as brave as i used to be. im not as efficient as i was#i get older and more tired and while i never questioned if studying med was the path i want i do question what will happen next#“is this all im ever going to be?” im good at what i do but day by day i lose sight of tje girl who knew how to laugh n smile. ik what makes#me happy but i rarely smile genuinely anymore. im so tired and want to sleep for a long time but i dont wanna fail. i dont wanna be NOT good#but it makes me cry when i know i can do many great things but i dont feel loved. people compliment me but dont approach me bcos they say im#intimidating or that im too quiet in class. i wish i could tell them i wanna join their parties too or i wanna meet their friends n hangout#but what if it doesnt work out? what if i wasted my time getting to know someone id eventually regret? what if im the disappointing one?#the days are getting shorter but it always feels like a long day. im ashamed to admit i want someone to hold me yet refuse to have anyone
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arolesbianism · 1 day
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Thinking abt Sif Odile duo looping au again and I wanna be able to plot everything out more coherently but act 5 eternally looms overhead and boy I do not wanna look up
#rat rambles#stars posting#like I have a vague idea of some of the like themes I imagine being present late game but it doesnt change the fact that act 5 isnt very#duo looper au friendly especially in this case with most of the ideas I have#I rly want it to be both a breaking point for them as individuals and a breaking point for their relationship but idk how to go about that#fully taking the rest of the party into account especially since Im not even sure if I wanna give odile her own friendquests#like I Could but I also think it'd be fun for many reasons to not#and even if I Did itd be hard to justify having both be able to happen and go wrong in one loop#and theres not rly a good solution to that I think so my best bet is probably to just leave odile friendquestless#but Id rly like to still have odile quarrel with the rest of the party in a significant way#idk maybe it can be the scene where sif comes back to the lighthouse or smth?#like he comes back and odile just completely lashes out at him or smth and the others get rly upset with her#but then theres also the whole walk through the house that I have to figure out and Im also not set on how that should go#maybe it can be like reality almost splitting as they both try to use timecraft at the same time?#not sure how Id go about portraying that in story though since the rest of the party cant rly experience that I think#Im sure theres some way you could pull that off tho Im just too tired to have any good ideas atm#and then the biggest bastard comes in. mal moments.#like I cant just put them both there! that's not how that works!#and I dont wanna just leave them mostly vanilla thats boringgggg#but Id probably have to. alas.#afterwards is also a bit fuzzy but I have rhe general idea down#me and the bestie when we both made the same wish but dont know that and have both been falling into a spiral over it#(we dont even realize that the part of the wish that was the exact same was the core of the wish)#(we both just thought that we accidentally trapped the other with us in this hell)#(we also have been actively getting worse at communicating for months now so by the time the wishcraft stuff came up we were both deep in#the no feelings talky talk zone)#(we probably should have known smth was up when everyone started consistently thinking that we had a fight every loop)#(maybe we did but we just didnt want to admit they were right)#god I wish I was more confident with writing odile dialogue I wanna draw scenes from this au so bad#it doesnt help that I got too comfortable being into a media that had like 3 fans and now ppl might actually look at what I create
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scierwnik · 4 months
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Dude this sucks
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draco-renn · 4 months
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Man. All I do these days is fail to meet expectations and then get upset at myself for failing to meet those expectations. This sucks.
#the dragon sings his songs#blowing out smoke#i'm supposed to be taking this break from my course as an opportunity to do the things I've been meaning to do and I've just been rotting—#—in bed on my phone and sleeping in and jacking off like i hardly even get up to eat or go to the bathroom#side note i know this is a textbook sign of depression and burnout (comma) most likely both (comma) but who in my Chinese family is going—#—to believe that? def not mom who'll just scream at me for not sucking it up and pushing through it and not dad who won't do shit#my grandparents might believe me but there's a language barrier on mom's side plus 公公 seems to think I'm the perfect infallible capable—#—[granddaughter] and I can't bear to break his heart with the truth#and then on dad's side they'll probably be sympathetic but everything i tell them makes its way back to my parents and that'll just result—#—in ont huge blowup that'll drive another wedge between mom and dad. and I mean PLEASE hurry up and get divorced but I also don't want 爺爺—#—and 嫲嫲 to get caught in the crossfire#plus I'm supposed to be helping them esp now that 爺爺 is running out of time as an active able-bodied person but instead of doing that I—#—spent all day in bed. which is not helping my guilt and shame on top of everything else i have to deal with (comma) let alone his workload#today's such a nice sunny beautiful day too which makes me feel even worse for not even going for a walk or anything#it's still light out so i could but sunk cost fallacy is kicking my ass plus i have Mandarin class kn a couple hours#and k know it's a couple HOURS but I'd have to get dressed and set a timer and everything and just the thought is so overwhelming that I—#—just can't. i'd ask to be institutionalized if it wasn't for the rampant ableism in the mental health field plus the fact that—#—institutionalization is just an extension of incarceration#if only the people who have power over me would just listen and actually take care of me so i wouldn't have pushed myself to this point
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camgoloud · 9 months
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the unaffordability of one bedroom apartments in my area is something that can be so oppressive to me personally
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get-more-bald · 10 months
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when you're an inherently bad person🤪
#im a firmly believe that people arent truly or inherently born evil. except me ofc#the thing is that. if im not a bad person or whatever. im just incredibly unpleasant to handle deal with or be around. which may be worse#because im actually trying to be fun to be around. in general. when im not stressed out of my mind or almost (or actively) crying. i do try#and if im inherently unpleasant. it explains everything but it means i wont ever have anyone. not really.#its like a have a bad smell around me that i cant get off. which i also fear may be the reality as well.#i do shower! i do use deodorant and sometimes the fuckign. body mists or perfumes or whatever. nice smelling shite i dont actually ever wan#to use but i must be somewhat pleasant#but do i use too much of it? not enough? do i shower the wrong way? should i isolate myself forever amd not subject people to that smell?#well!#vent post#also i never fucking smile which is apparently important in being approachable. but i can blame that on the autism#god i fucking hate being who i am#im not even talking about personality rn. being trans. and autistic the way i am. and whatever else i fucking probably am. and being a part#of this fucking family and living in this god damned place. i hate it all#its difficult and i dont want to be that anymore but i cant ever stop. i can move out in what. a couple of years? i could eventually go no#contact with that family? i couldnt. but i wont ever stop being who i am at my core. and thats so depressing and it wants me to kill myself#not in a painful way though. no cutting or whatever. pills or a quick jump would be enough
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