#my sister got really stressed but only because i was yelling...the rest of it was so normal to her

[cameronluvr]

BRUISES — toxic!rafe cameron x routledge!reader ; john b x sister!reader

summary: your brother sees a bruise on your neck, but it isn’t a hickey. he questions you about it, but it quickly turns into an argument when he discovers exactly who hurt you.

warnings: mostly john b x reader, mentions of choking, DV, toxic/abusive relationship, not much rafe x reader directly, angst, reader and john b arguing, name calling, mentions of jealous!rafe, toxic!rafe — lmk if i missed any! ✮

: ̗̀➛ 𝓶𝔂 𝓶𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

you sneak into the chateau at 10 minutes past midnight, only to be greeted by your brother who had turned the light on which made you jump. “where have you been?” john b asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

“out.” you say, looking down to hide your face from him. you had been crying, but he’d already noticed your red-stained eyes. “what’s wrong?” he asks, frowning with concern.

“nothing, just don’t worry about it.” you answer with your head still down as you attempt to walk straight past him, but he stops you, lightly grabbing your forearm to turn you back around.

“what, john b?!” you snap at him, yanking your arm out of his grip. you don’t mean to be mad at him, but you just want to be left alone after a stressful day. “what’s the matter with you? why are you acting like this?” he raises his voice at you, wanting to know why you’ve turned into a bitch all of a sudden.

“i’m not!— oh my god. just leave me alone!” you yell at him, turning around to rush to your room, slamming the door shut after you. john b stands in the same spot as before, loudly sighing at you.

he decided to leave you alone for the night. even though you’re older than him, he still liked to look out for you ever since your dad went missing. he went to his room to go to sleep, hopefully you’ll talk to him in the morning.

༉‧₊˚. the next morning arrived faster than you’d hoped for. you cried all night feeling guilty for the way you spoke to your little brother, but he really has no idea of the situation you’re in.

you got out of bed and slowly exited your room, seeing john b up and awake already, sitting on the couch and watching tv. “hey…” you say, walking past to head to the kitchen. “hey…” he responds, just as awkwardly as you did.

you open the fridge and grab a snack, before turning to look at your brother. “uh— i’m sorry for last night. i didn’t mean to act like that… i just…” you explain, closing the fridge door and sighing. “you’re good. it’s fine. y’wanna talk about it?” he asks, switching the tv off to divert his full attention to you.

“uh, i don’t know…” you hesitate, knowing you’re hiding a kind of huge secret from him. you had been secretly seeing his biggest enemy, rafe cameron, behind his back. you knew how badly he tormented your brother and his friends, but for some reason, he was different around you.

you hadn’t personally dealt with rafe for yourself, until now. he saw you at the beach a few weeks ago, and thought to himself about how pretty you looked in your bikini, how tanned you were, how contagious your laugh was… and that was it. he introduced himself to you as a completely different person, despite having heard all the stories about him from your brother and the rest of the pogues, including rafe’s own sister.

rafe was kind, sweet and funny at first. ever since you saw him after that, your heart skipped a beat. he was so handsome, you liked him so much, but you couldn’t do this to your little brother. your brother who had been threatened by rafe, bullied, tormented, fought with…

you knew you had to keep it a secret, because once rafe cameron claims somebody, he really claims them. and this time around, it’s you. a pogue, a routledge, someone nobody would ever expect to be rafe’s.

— “cmon, i’m here for you. you know that, sis. what’s goin’ on?” he asks, patting the space on the couch next to him, motioning for you to come sit. you sigh, knowing you won’t be able to tell him without him getting upset that you’re dating rafe.

you know that no matter how or when you tell him, he’ll be angry. after thinking for a second, you walk over to him and sit down. he frowns at you as you sit down, noticing something on your neck. “what’s that?” he asks, putting his hand on your face to look, but you push him away. “nothing” you shake your head, trying to brush it off.

“is that?— that’s not a hickey,” he looks into your eyes with nothing but concern. “just— leave it.” you look at him with widened eyes to show that you were serious. “y/n, what the hell happened? who did that?” he asks, raising his voice in frustration now.

“nobody, john b, god!” you yell as you stand up again, “don’t walk away from me, and don’t tell me to leave you alone either like you did last night. you’re acting weird lately, what are you hiding?” john b stands up too, trying to get an answer out of you. your brother is genuinely concerned for you.

you sigh, turning around to face him head on. “john b, i— ugh.” you begin to say, but cut yourself off, not knowing where to even start. “what?” he asks in annoyance, needing to know who hurt his sister.

“who?” he asks one last time.

“… rafe,” you hesitate, looking around the room to avoid seeing your brother’s reaction. “rafe?” he asks, not sure if he heard you correctly. “…yes” you nod, looking at him now with teary eyes.

“rafe did that?” he asks, getting visibly mad now. he reaches his hand over, forcing your head up by your jaw but not enough to hurt you. he looks at your neck again, before you push him away, again.

“why the fuck did he do that?” he asks, huffing through his nose with anger, looking back and forth into both of your eyes, trying not to go insane. “it’s, uh— we were… having an argument last night.” you slowly explain the story. “an argument? about what?” he asks, not seeing a reason for you to even speak to rafe in the first place, let alone fight with him…

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ᴸᴬˢᵀ ᴺᴵᴳᴴᵀ .𖥔 ݁ ˖

“i saw the way you were laughing and giggling with topper, don’t lie to me!” rafe argued, turning around to point in your face. he had walked away from you and the rest of the kooks, causing you to follow him.

“i wasn’t flirting with him, oh my god!” you argue back. rafe had somehow come to the conclusion that you were flirting with his best friend, even though you were just having a conversation. yeah, maybe you did laugh once or twice, but since when aren’t you allowed to laugh?

“yeah, sure, whatever you say.” he scrunches his face up, sarcastically nodding at you. “you are so strange, rafe. now you’re insecure about me talking to your friends? what, do you want me to just sit in the corner by myself?” you raise your voice, however he doesn’t like your attitude.

“don’t raise your voice at me.” he demands with a threatening look on his face. “jesus, rafe, we aren’t even together! who cares if i was talking to other guys, it’s not like you want me to be your girlfriend” you shrug, trying to act smart but he reached over and grabbed you by your throat, shoving you into the wall.

“oh, so you were flirting with him?” he asks, choking you to the point where you can’t breathe. you try to say no, but nothing comes out, so you shake your head drastically.

“you sure? cause i’m almost certain you just admitted you were.” he tuts, acting so casual whilst he’s got you pinned against the wall. his grip on your neck was intense, it felt like all of his fingers were slowly digging into your neck.

…

“nothing. i just… i don’t even remember.” you lie to your brother, shaking your head. “y/n, don’t play games with me. why did rafe choke you? those are clearly finger—” john b says, leaning down to look at your neck again, “stop!” you cut him off. “look. i don’t wanna’ talk about it. we were just fighting over something petty. it doesn’t even matter.” you shake your head.

“it does matter when it’s turned you into a whole different person,” john b sighs, making you sigh too. “are you seeing him?” the dreaded question comes. “what? no…” you give him a look of disgust. “are you sure? because pope told me he saw you with rafe at the golf course like… what, 2 days ago?” your brother catches you out.

“… i wasn’t with him. i just— saw him there.” you try to make an excuse.

“oh really? since when do you normally decide to hang out at the golf course, where all the kooks are?” he asks, raising his eyebrows at the word kooks, reminding you of where you came from, and that you were a pogue. not a kook.

“does this whole kook vs pogue shit even matter? i mean, seriously, how long is it gonna’ last?” you raise your voice, making him shake his head at how much you truly have changed.

“y/n, you were the one who always hated the kooks. you hated rafe, topper, kelce… and now you’re on their side? now you suddenly wanna drop the whole kook vs pogues thing, too? you are definitely fucking rafe. no wonder you’ve turned into such a miserable bitch lately.” your brothers words hurt you deeply, but he was right.

he shakes his head at you, giving you a look of betrayal. he was upset, and it was all your fault. “where are you going?” you ask as he walks away, grabbing the keys to the twinkie.

“to find rafe” he says, before walking out and slamming the door shut after him. you sit and sob for a minute, realizing you might have just ruined your entire relationship with your brother. as his big sister, he trusted you, but for you to go behind his back and chase the one person he despised, it hurt his feelings. but you are still his sister, and nobody hurts his sister.

“J. HUNTING DOWN RAFE. U COMING WITH?„

john b sent a text to jj, who answered almost immediately.

“HELL YEA MAN„

jj doesn’t even know what rafe did this time, but he’s always down to beat him up.

this was angstyyyyyy 😩 as u can see, i love to write arguments and toxic stuff lol. hope ya enjoy pretties ᥫ᭡ ᥫ᭡ WILL DEF BE WRITING A PART 2 TO THIS ; )))

@cameronluvr

[coquelicoq]

sent my dad some extremely vulnerable and honest texts about his parenting and immediately turned on "hide alerts" for his contact. at some point i will have to face whatever his response is, but that day is not today.

[sc0tters]

So Long | Luke Hughes

summary: Luke has always had a crush on Jacks best friend but when he’s called on to help her at a party he realises she feels the same way.

request: yes/no

warnings: mentions of being drunk, possible swearing.

word count: 1.28k

authors note: this was shorter than I wanted but I ran out of time before my dad has to be picked up and this is the best I could offer you guys since I wanted it ready for Luke’s birthday! In this universe we are going to act like Luke only went to New Jersey after the end of sophomore year rather than after the end of the season because I forgot about that fact when I wrote this out. Soft Luke was also a good place to be before the start of Angst week!

pt 2

Luke thought he was good at hiding it.

Truly the way his cheeks turned red at the mere thought of you was something he thought was only in his head.

You met the Hughes family during the summer when you were seven. Since you were two months younger than Jack it obviously meant that you became friends with him.

The two of you were as thick as thieves during your time growing up, staying up late under blanket forts as you gossiped about events, irritating Quinn as you wouldn’t stop laughing on the boat. From the moment summer started it was you and Jack against the world.

Quinn always loved you like the sister he never had as he watched you grow up from a child to a woman and how you were basically the first of the Hughes siblings to graduate from college, even if you weren’t really one of them.

Luke, your sweet little Luke always had a special space in your heart. During your junior year at umich he arrived and you two grew closer than ever.

Beforehand you had to admit that you saw him as Jacks little brother and simply just that. But when he joined you on campus you saw so many more sides to him. More times than Luke would like to admit he ended up in your dorm in tears as he got stressed out after games that didn’t go his way.

He also had a few times were you were called to take care of his drunken ass that actually made you laugh.

Most recently though just before you graduated it was his turn to take care of you.

Nick had called Luke after some guy had started trying to make a move on you whilst you were drunk off of your ass “I wanna see him,” you complained resting your head in Nicks shoulder as he laughed.

Your friendship was refreshing, you actually bonded over your shared dislike for a professor in your freshman year “Luke said he was coming.” Nick smiled wrapping his arm around you “you like him don’t you?” He added watching your face turn bright red.

The man who was easily your best friend on campus wasn’t an idiot “that’s Jack’s brother!” You whisper yelled somehow being mindful of the fact that you two were sat outside “doesn’t answer my question.” Nick pointed out as he tapped your nose.

He laughed as he watched you stay quiet “I think he’s a great person,” you shrugged still slurring your words.

Maybe it was because you guys were days out from graduation that Nick was pressing this topic “if Luke wasn’t Jacks brother what would you say to him?” Nick proposed turning to face you “I’d tell him I wanna fuck him.” You blurted out causing the boy to bust out laughing.

If there was one thing Nick loved about you was your lack of a filter “y/n!” He shook his head smiling as he locked eyes with Luke “there he is.” You gasped quickly getting up as you lost your footing “woah there.” Luke was quick to wrap his hands around your waist as he steadied your body.

Nick smiled as he watched you two “I’m going to let you two get going.” He announced sending you a salute.

You blew Nick an air kiss “you better get that girl you wanted.” You pointed your finger at him causing him to dramatically place his hands on his lips “only if you do the same thing with yours.

Luke unintentionally let his hand tense around your waist as you looked up at him with wide eyes “sorry,” the younger boy apologised as his cheeks turned pink.

This was one of the many times that Nick wished he could show you how you looked. Staring up at Luke like he was the only man in the world you smiled seemingly forgetting that you had been sat waiting for him for the last fifteen minutes “hi,” you grinned tapping him on the nose as you erupted out in a giggle seeing his face scrunch.

The Hughes boy didn’t say anything until he heard the front door shut “let’s get you home.” Now surprisingly you behaved on the walk him just following Luke as his finger stayed hooked in your belt hoop after the one time you tried to walk off the cafe on campus that had closed hours ago.

Luke had to admit though that he was close to laughing a few times as you sat on the counter in the kitchen. All of the boys were meant to be asleep so Luke knew he could take care of you up there “bout time I had to take care of you.” The hockey player confessed as he grabbed a makeup wipe from the pack you had left for when the guys had ladies over.

You nodded enjoying the feeling of the cold wipe against your cheek as you stared at Luke’s facial features “what is going through your mind pretty girl?” His voice was soft as he tried out the new nickname.

It caused a smile to form on your lips “you’re pretty.” You mumbled as he grabbed your chin so he could wipe the make up off of the other side of your cheek.

He kept quiet as he tried to think about the way he should respond “you’re drunk,” he sighed causing you to frown.

The pout on your lips was childish as you pushed his hand away so you could face him again “no I’m not,” you shook your head thinking about it “I’m only slightly.” You corrected yourself.

Luke found his place between your legs as his hands sat on either side of you “we can talk about this in the morning?” He offered feeling his heart pound out of his chest when your fingers ran along his jaw.

The tension between you two could have been cut with a knife as you huffed “want to do it now,” you confessed crossing your arms.

A part of you thought it was smart pushing yourself forward as you assumed that Luke would move away “woah,” the boys back hit the cupboard behind him as his hands landed on your hips.

Your eyes went from his to his lips as you smiled “oopsies?” You shrugged letting your fingers crawl in between his hoodie and his shirt “what am I gonna do with you?” Luke asked softly laughing as he shook his head staying in the same position.

This was the perfect moment for drunken you “you could just kiss me?” Even you were unsure of your words as you knew you were telling him how you felt about him.

Luke wanted to worry about what you would do when you were sober but in that moment he mainly just wanted to kiss you. It was something he had been waiting to do for years so the hockey player tilted your chin up as he leaned down to kiss you.

You melted into the kiss as you weren’t used to having those soft moments with anyone.

But of course the moment was short lived “get it Hughesy!” A cheer came from upstairs that was shortly followed by a slap to the back of someone’s head.

A laugh left your lips as you saw Luke turn pink “now you can tell Trevor you beat him to me.” The duo had an unserious competition as Luke had a crush on you and Trevor just liked flirting with you “you knew about that?” Luke’s eyes went wide as it was something that had gone on for at least eight months now.

“Please I told him to convince you to start it.”

[conradfisherismine]

Why not me? Part 1?

TW: unloving mother towards reader, Conrad being a dick

Conrad fisher x reader

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•••••••••••••••

Sitting with my head resting on the wall I flush the toilet. That’s the third time I’ve thrown up today. Knowing that I’m pregnant just makes me want to cry, not because I don’t want the baby but more so the fact that my sister can’t decide witch brother she wants. The one that took my virginity away and got me pregnant all in one night, or the one that kinda looks like a puppy. Don’t get me wrong I love jere but he does look like a lost puppy sometimes.

I don’t even know what going on with Conrad, one day he’s fucking me and the next morning “it was a mistake and never should have happened.” Who fucking takes someone’s virginity and then drops them. URGGGGGGG. He makes me so mad sometimes. The only person who knows I’m pregnant is Steven, he barged in the bathroom when I was taking the test; then waited with me once he found out what happened.

Let me take us back a bit to when we arrived to the house.

Getting out of the car I take a nice long breath in, “I’m finally home.” I mumble to myself. Not that anyone would have payed attention to anything I say anyway, my family doesn’t care about me much… well except for Steven Susannah came bolting out of the house at full speed. “ they’re here!” She yelled over to the boys. Jeremiah runs over to belly, looks over her for a second the picks her up and twirls her in the air. “ awh bells I missed you so much!”

Few moment later

“You know what time it is” Steven says with the smirk visible in his voice. “Belly flop time!!!” The three boys scream at the absolute top if they’re lungs. Belly tries to make a run for it but Conrad catches her. Urg the way he grabbed her waist made my heart shatter. I’ve loved Connie since before I can remember, my sister claims to have loved him since we were 11 but I sorta feel like that’s not true. She would always tell me that she didn’t want him and that she loved him like a brother.

Belly and I had huge glow ups this year. I let my hair grow out this winter too, I never really liked it that long anyways it just felt like the thing to do. Ignoring the fact that neither of the boys said hi to me, I made my way inside hopping mom and Susannah would let me talk with them for a little bit.

It’s been 10 minutes and I hear the back door open, then I see Steven and Jeremiah walk in.

“Hey y/n I missed you. Did your hair get longer?” Jeremiah says as he walks over and lightly threads his fingers thought my hair.

“Yes jere bear I’ve been growing it out over the winter, I actually kinda like it longer.” I’ve always called Jeremiah jere bear since we were little, the odd time when I’m aggravated by him or upset I’ll call him Jeremiah but other then that it’s always “jere bear” or “miah”.

All of a sudden I’m being overcome by a cold wet blanket.

“BELLY, I’m going to kill you!”

“Jeez calm down y/n/n” Conrad mumbles

Belly finally lets go after some bickering and I run upstairs to get changed, I’m suddenly felling self conscious once I get into my room and look in the mirror. My white top is completely see through and you can see all my stretch marks.

So many bad thoughts start running through my head;” he’s never going to want you” or ” you look ugly”oh and the best one”just kill yourself they would all be better without you anyway”. My feet feel planted into the floor, it feels like theres quick sand under my feet and me going further into the sand the more the bad thoughts get to me.

Knock knock knock

“One second!” I call out as I quickly through a sweater on.

“Come in”

“You alright y/n, you seemed stressed out earlier when belly was hugging you.” Steven expressed his concern as he made his way over to my bed.

“Yea, I’m fine she was just getting me wet and I didn’t like it. Plus i was wearing a white shirt, last time I checked white plus water equals see through.” I say with sass loaded in my voice.

“Whatever,I’m out.” God he confuses me sometimes.

Time skip to after dinner

I haven’t really touched anything on my plate but no one says anything to me anyways they just keep taking to each other, that is until I stand up and go to walk away.

“Y/n where are you going, you know not to leave the table till everyone left and you have cleared the table.” My mom sneers. I just sit back down not wanting to escalate the situation. Jere looks at me with a glint of pity but it’s quickly gone when belly starts talking to him again. After everyone’s gone and left their dishes on the table even tho Susannah insisted on helping me, mom just dragged her away telling them that this was my job from now on. God I feel so unloved. After I’ve put the dishes in the dish washer, put the leftovers in containers in the fridge, and cleaned the table I finally get to relax. I make my way outside thinking I would be the only one out there at this time at night, only to find Conrad sitting at the edge of the pool smoking a joint.

“Thought you said smoking was for losers and it made you dumber.”

“I did that was before I found out how good it made me feel.” We went back and forth a little bit then after a while he patted the spot next to him.

“Sit you must be tired of standing by now.”

I pull up the bottom of my pants a bit then take a seat next to him putting my feet in the pool. Maybe feeling so unloved was why I let it happen but what I remember was Conrad saying all these things that made me think he wanted me, then me being in he’s bed. He slowly started to take my clothes off knowing it was my first time and what I thought was an act of kindness must not really have been. After getting me down to just my panties he looks up at me for consent and I nod my head you can imagine the rest.

1 month later/ present time

I brush my teeth and leave the bathroom wishing I didn’t let that day happen, I go back to my room curl up in bed with my blanky yes I’m a 16 year old who still has a blanket., and start crying the tears feel like they’re never going to stop. I feel the bed dip beside me and I try to hold in my tears till I realize it’s Steven and he closed the door behind him, then I just turn over into his embrace and cry as he rubs my back.

“I heard you throwing up, I had to come make sure you were ok.” He whispers loud enough I can hear it but not loud enough someone else will hear.

“Susannah wanted me to come ask you if you wanted to come mini putting with us and on my way up I heard but didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Okay” my voice comes out all raspy from all the crying I’ve done.

“Good get dressed wipe those tears I know you’re sad about what happened but he doesn’t deserve your tears.” I nod as I wipe my face and get up making my way to my closet, Steven makes his way out of my room.

I walk down the stairs to see everyone putting their shoes on and getting ready to go when Susannah sees me.

“Y/n I’m glad you decided to join us, I was a little worried when I heard you throw-“. Steven doesn’t let her finish asking if we should go now that I’m ready. We end up deciding to take two cars to fit everyone.

“ I call driving!” Belly kinda screams.

“Ha funny. No!” Mom says sarcastically. “I’m driving beck can sit passenger, belly, Steven and Jeremiah can sit in the back.”

“ Wait mom i don’t thi-“

“No arguing Steven I don’t want that stupid brat in my car any longer then she has to be and Conrad knows how to drive so they’ll be fine.” Mom says with a tone so calm but strict that I flinched.

“ I’m sorry y/n/n, it’ll be okay just don’t talk to him.” Steven whispers in my ear. I look over at Conrad but he seems upset that I was looking at him, not that I’m surprised he hasn’t really talked to me since that night. When he does it’s just snide remark’s about the way I’m eating or sitting or really anything that involves me being in the same room as him. It makes me cry at night thinking about that night and how nice and “loving” he was, turns out I was just stupid and naive. Jeremiah must have seen me look at the floor and sigh that I was gonna be alone with Conrad cuz he cherps up

“ I’ll go with con and y/n/n.”

“No you don’t have to jere. You can come with us don’t feel obligated to be with that pig.” My mom says like she really cares about him not being with me.

“ I don’t even think Connie should be with her but someone unfortunately invited her so someone has to drive her there.”

“ If it’s such a problem I can stay here.” I whisper like if I talk any louder I’ll be in trouble.

“There will be no such thing happening y/n, you are coming with us. Laur stop being so mean to your daughter.” She says lovingly towards me then strictly to my mom.

“ I want to go with them it’ll be okay” Jeremiah says confidently without hesitation.

The 2 fisher boys sitting up front with me in the back. This is better than sitting up front with him I guess.

“Could you get your big fat head off my window.” Conrad snaps at me. I flinch. I can feel the tears in my eyes I mumble a sorry and just remove my head from the window looking down at my hands.

“That wasn’t very nice Conrad.” Jeremiah exclaims.

“It’s okay I’m used to it miah.” I whispered lightly. Conrad seems taken aback by what I said but just keeps his eyes on the road.

Jeremiah sighs “ You shouldn’t be. I don’t get why Laurel treats you the way she does.”

“ Cause I’m worthless, and I’m not good enough for anyone. It’s always gonna be belly. Right Conrad.” I mumble feeling the tears streaming down my face. Conrad just scruffs.

When we get to the mini putt I wait for everyone before grabbing a golf club. I grab the one with the purple end. Steven hands me a purple ball he knows me so well. As I start walking behind the group so no one makes anymore comments about me because I don’t think I could take anymore right this second with the pregnancy hormones and the fact that I just stopped crying. Susannah turns around and looks around as if looking for someone.

“Y/n where are you.” Then she sees me. “Oh there you are come here.” She pulls me towards her not caring about the glares she’s getting from my mom. I don’t think she wants me over here but Susannah seems content with me here so I guess I’ll stay.

[aita-blorbos]

I (41m) accidentally outed my sister (41f), who has tried to kill me, to her transphobic dad. AITA?

To provide some context to the title, my sister (S) myself, and the rest of our siblings were not raised by our biological father. We were all separated from a very young age and only reconnected with our father later, so strictly speaking, I am referring to her foster father (K).

That set aside, as the title indicates, I did not intend to out her.

S and I never got along after reuniting with our father. I will be the first to admit that we both did some pretty horrid things to each other because of this, especially because, looking back, our father encouraged it. In short, he asked me to destroy a project she'd been working on for years because it displeased him. I didn't really want to by our father had a lot of sway in all of our lives, so I did. S and I ended up getting into a series of fights afterwards, during which she tried to burn down my house and beat me to death with a weapon.

Eventually, our father was put into a coma by one of our (now deceased) brothers and the majority of us went our own ways and haven't seen each other in the eleven years since.

As I found out through one of our brothers that still talks to her, she's apparently changed her name and started living as a woman since the last time I saw her. None of my business, so I didn't reach out to her. I did, however, casually mention it to her foster father during a chance meeting a couple days ago.

He didn't say anything at the time so I thought it was fine, but now one of our other siblings has shown up to yell at me because it turns out (I swear I didn't know this before now) K was extremely physically abusive to S when she was younger and they've been low contact pretty much since our father's coma. So he didn't know. From what it sounds like, he found out she was trans from me and immediately went over to her house to call her a slur to her face and now she's been having a panic attack.

S has also accused me of trying to "ruin her life like always".

Cannot stress enough that I DID NOT know, but now I'm wondering: AITA?

[azurbee]

BWAAA venting, don’t be on this post if you don’t wanna hear it

So like- life is hard, that goes without saying, but shit has really been bothering me recently.

I guess that most of my problems is because of my mother, I don’t even think I can even call her one anymore. I have always been paranoid and distant from her, whenever I was young and I did something slightly wrong she would yell at me loudly or sometimes even beat me with a wooden spoon which, I probably deserved.

It’s one of the reasons why I don’t talk to her much and why I hate expressing myself without permission. I feel like if I express myself too freely people will just start getting annoyed by me and start to hate me and even start to yell at me. I’ve developed an intense fear of being yelled at, I’m fine being yelled at when it’s just joking around but when it comes down to genuine anger I just feel like a disappointment. I feel useless and unwanted and the person who yells at me should just get rid of me so that way they can feel better. I feel like I’m not aloud to make mistakes because if I do then people will start to hate me and I’ll just be a disappointment.

I really started to hate my mother when she divorced my dad. The only explanation she gave for it was “oH i JuSt DoN’t LoVe HiM aNyMoRe”. HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE SOMEONE ANYMORE AFTER WHAT, ALMOST 25 YEARS??? AND EVEN AFTER YOU STARTED A FAMILY WITH THEM FOR 16 YEARS? I hated that she did that, I hate that I’m seeing her so much more happy now, I hate that she did that to my dad. Do you even realize the shit he’s been through?? You just gave him his second divorce! I don’t know why he divorce his first wife, and I don’t think I have the right to ask but my dad is the best father I could ever ask for. Unlike my mom, he actually understands my brother and I, he does whatever he can to spend time with us.

My dad has worked so hard for everyone for his whole life, he has done so much for us AND THIS IS HOW HE’S TREATED??? Two divorces, a shitty new boss who doesn’t allow him overtime for most of the time, he has to live with my step-sister and her god awful family in their zoo of a house, which may I add, ISN’T EVEN THEIR HOUSE! IT’S MY DADS AND THEY DON’T EVEN PAY HIM RENT! OH AND THEY CHERRY ON TOP, THERES A SCREAMING BABY 24/7 AND MY SISTER AND HER SHITTY HUSBAND DON’T DO SHIT ABOUT IT!!! MY DAD EVEN SAYS HE FEELS LIKE A PRISONER IN HIS OWN HOUSE!

I hate that this is what my dad gets in return for everything he has done for us, I hate that my useless ass can’t do shit about it.

There’s also the fact that I have been getting worn down by the fact I can’t have a day to rest. During the week, I have school. When it gets to Friday and the weekend I go to my dads. When there’s a weekend I don’t got to my dads, my mom forces me to go somewhere with her. It’s been so draining, I just want a weekend to go straight to a house and actually get some rest. I’ve been so burnt out from this that I don’t have the motivation to do school work or personal work and that just adds even more stress to everything.

My mom has been losing her cool a lot more recently, especially with my dogs. I’m genuinely scared she might kill them. I love my dogs to death and I don’t know what I’ll do without them.

So much shit has been happening that I’m sure that it doesn’t matter what I think anymore. I’m just a punching bag, I’m only alive to make people feel better about themselves, my feelings don’t matter. I’m tired but I can’t sleep in the same house with a women like her. I just want this to stop.

I wanted to wait a little longer but I keep getting pushed to the edge to just end it all now and no longer have to deal with this pain.

I have no point in writing this vent, this is probably all fake. I’m just faking all of this, I’m not sad I’m just doing this for attention and I hate myself for it.

[all-the-fun-of-the-cirkus]

listened to white light/white heat by the velvet underground for the first time. been a while since i listened to a record that actively wants to kill me

i can't decide if this album's aged brilliantly or terribly. obviously it's legendarily unlistenable and abrasive, and when it was released there was pretty much nothing that sounded anything like it. but the velvets are mega famous now, and whole genres have been invented based off their vibe. so, this album isn't anywhere near as shocking and difficult as it was back in the day, because so many artists since have copied it or deliberately exceeded it, and i can't tell if that's a good or a bad thing

because, being realistic, there's very little in the way of actual songs here. the title track is a blatant rewrite of i'm waiting for the man (although i think i actually like the rewrite more purely because it's a little more complex, i.e. it has more than two chords), here she comes now is a pleasant (if horny) breather. the rest is... otherwise, and i can't help but wonder if divorcing it of all that shock factor mutes some of its power

it certainly doesn't mute all of it, though. side 2 is where it gets real interesting, with i heard her call my name basically just being a vehicle for some wild, feedbacky guitar soloing, and i don't mind that one bit (it's a mystery to me why lou reed plays so little guitar on his records, he's really rather good at it), and sister ray...

i mean, if you're reading this i'm going to assume you're at least vaguely familiar with the band (if not, i'm amazed you got this far but hi!), but depending on your tastes a seventeen minute one chord jam with no production to speak of, featuring someone yelling semi-improvised (at least it feels like it to me, there's no way he wrote that fuckin ding-dong line so many times) poetry about an orgy and two guys just wailing madly at their instruments, for (cannot stress this enough) seventeen minutes might well be your nightmare, or your idea of heaven. as usual, i'm in between, but i did very much like it; i was flagging around nine minutes on but it gets real ferocious from that point on, and i kind of really dig the vibe. it feels like the musical equivalent of a drugged up, chaotic party careening out of control, particularly when reed begins shaking up his delivery, stuttering, slowing down, speeding up, and his and cale's soloing, as well as the ever-increasing tempo, paints the same picture

there's two other pieces, one of which is blackly hilarious and one terrifying. i couldn't tell you a thing about the music of the gift, given it's slammed right into one channel and behind the spoken monologue, but the monologue makes up for it. honestly i think most of that comes down to cale's dry delivery (with a very lovely welsh brogue, i might add), with one bit in particular not, uh, ageing too well, but there's a nice subtle wit to the prose as well, with a few choice double entendres (reed 100% knew what he was doing with "rough hands gripped his package," c'mon). not sure how much relisten factor there is to it though

lady godiva's operation, on the other hand, uh, fucking hell. if you've not heard it before, a) again, i'm a little confused why you're reading this far but cool and b) go listen to it now before i spoil it. anyway, i was expecting it to be a relative oasis of pleasantness, and the first half is alright, i guess. nice melody, nice singing from cale, but it's very repetitive. then reed comes in, like he's forcing cale out the way. then it just starts building, the instruments desyncing, the heart monitor sound effect, the vocals sliding up and down in the mix, and the song disintegrates around you, and it's legitimately frightening. again, it's the aural equivalent of a surgery going wrong and dissolving into chaos, only experienced through a fog of drugs and anaesthethic, and it's supremely unpleasant in a fashion that's impressive, but which i haven't decided if it's actually enjoyable or not. thank fuck for here she comes now, which is nothing special but you need to hear just to recover

this is certainly an experience, and i think it's an experience anyone interested in rock music should have. i'd put it comfortably third in their canon (behind the two self-titled-ish albums and ahead of loaded, ftr), and i'm glad i've filled in that gap in my collection

[samrsgyi]

Fear street girls with a S/O who has a personality like shinobu kocho's

(1994, 1978, 1966)

1994

.

.

.

.

.

.

Deena

- She thinks you're acting weird but loves your personality

- You're a generous person who represents "Beauty" and "Intelligence"

- Whenever you meet any of her friends, you always welcome them with a warm smile but, if any of them get on your nerves you just shoot them a death glare. If you get angry, like shinobu, you would have a warm smile, your eyes closed and three veins forming in your head

- Deena still loves you even though you act queer/ odd. She thinks it's badass that you do it

- When Deena was trying to meditate in her room from her stress at school, you just appeared out of no where and got close to her face and said, " I see you're working very hard."

- Of course Deena did get flustered and instantly said, " What are you doing here?" You replied with a smile and you said you just wanted to check on her to make sure she's ok

- Deena started to realize that everyday that you smile you got more and more genuine

- Deena finally had the guts to ask you...What was wrong...?"

- It threw you off the edge that she even asked you that, but you ignored her question and she would never find out the truth

Sam

- Thinks that you're too posotive

- There have been rumors about your personality and you had been pissed off about it

- Yet you didn't really care as long as no one made fun of your personality

- Sam is always trying to back off anybody who fuck's with you and telling them to "Fuck off..."

- You guys fight a little

- This is due to the fact that since Sam is possesed she argues with you about how you smile

- Until you broke. You said to her, " The only reason why I smile is because of my sister, Sam."

- "So stop trying to make a huge fucking fuss about it Sam. Cause I'm not gonna answer your sorry ass."

- You ran to the bathroom and grabbed a syringe full of purple poison and injected it into your arm. You let out a little groan and a vein formed in your arm then soon went away

- You put it back in your medical case then took out another syringe full of 26 milligrams of Antidote and injected it into your neck and almost let out a scream but it was silent

- Then you came out of the bathroom still smiling but more softer and saw Sam crying on the ground you went over they're apologized for yelling at her and she forgave you

- You thought to yourself, " This is all she needed to know, not the rest of your backstory."

Kate

[dearreader]

alright i’m going to vent in hopes that’ll get my body to fucking rest because i’ve been through several stressful situations and now that they’re over my bodies letting me KNOW it’s tired but not doing anything to fix it. if you want to read my rant go ahead but be warned ITS A LOT

first my friend found a lump in their breast and had to get it screened to see if it was cancer and they couldn’t go in for a week which made me panic because that’s not only my friend who may have cancer but i’m now panicking over my friend dying and worrying about my dads death and that trauma. then i started telling my tragic backstory™️ to said friend and went into detail over the abuse i got in the sorority which then made me relive all that shit. then my sister comes home for christmas and things shift from my normal routine and i try to ignore it but it’s getting more and more annoying and slowly driving me crazy. then my grandpa dies but i’m not upset because my dad didn’t like his family and tried to keep us away as much as possible and also they’re just weird and didn’t like to get together but i am actually upset in some way that i can’t fully identify because i don’t really care about him and i didn’t react the same way i reacted to his death thst i did ti my fathers and grammys death so it’s not that i’m upset upset but i’m still upset over a death in my family and shit but then i feel kinda guilty because of how awful he was to my dad and grandmother which feels like a whole other can of worms that i can’t express to my mom or sister because my mom always hated my grandpa because of how he treated my dad and my sister flat out told me she said she no longer had any grandparents after my grammy died SO I GOTTA RIDE THESE FEELINFS OUT ALONE. then my sister and i get into a fight because schedule and conflict issues if she’s doing X and needs Y because of work but me doing Y is my normal routine and i can’t do my normal routine now because she’s invading my space and it’s been driving me crazy but it took us 30 minutes of yelling for me to finally get to the root with my sister telling me she won’t take my abuse and will cut me out if i don’t start treating her better because to be fair i do treat her badly and don’t realize it so that’s on me and she snapped at me. but then that whole thing sends me into spiral of my sister hates me and we get into a fight over money but she’s actually not mad at me just annoyed because i’m playing the victim because i send her a long message that i think is detailing what she’s not seeing but it’s more me not taking accountability. then i wake up today and find out my friend doesn’t have cancer and see my sister text me back and i then have to swallow my pride and beat back any part of my brain that’s trying to defend myself when i did over react and hurt her and was mostly playing the victim so we’re goodish. and now im trying to fall asleep but my body refuses to do it even though it’s EXHAUSTED

oh, also my period was over a week fucking late for no reason then to make me miserable during the new year :p

[mango-bango-bby]

Heeyy Mango Boo! I read again your Hawks Masterlist and that one with Hayato wanting a sibling made me think: image Hawks darling having twins? Like, they looks like her clones but like male version. And she just like 'im going to be the only girl in this family?' Love your work honey!

♡ Twins!? ♡

(A/N: I know one of my last fics was a domestic fic but I loved this idea plus I’ve been in a domestic mood lately!! I think this idea is really cute 💖 I hope you like this!! I apologize for not having a fic put out on Thursday, I’ve been busy with classes and work and the Holiday Cheer Event)

Content Warning ⚠️: Yandere, domestic stuff, kids, hospitals, birth

Summary: You give birth to twins! (Yan!Hawks x Fem!reader)

Masterlist ➸ ♡

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Hayato really wanted a little sibling. He was always asking you and Keigo if you could give him a sibling. And he had been practicing counting down the days until you’d finally give birth to his younger sibling.

Ever since he found out that you were pregnant, he had just been waiting until the day. Honestly, Keigo has been waiting for you to give birth too! He was excited to meet his next child, plus you wouldn’t be in pain because of your pregnancy anymore.

Hayato jitters in his seat as he waits, he’s so excited to meet his siblings. Keigo comes out of your hospital room to check on his son. He was a bit hesitant at first, afraid you would somehow be taken away from him or you would tell the hospital staff how he kidnapped you but he knew it was the best decision.  

“Please, please, papa! I wanna meet my little brother or sister!” Hayato whines, pulling on his fathers pant leg so he’d hopefully let him see his little sibling. “Bud, mama’s gotta rest, I can ask her if you can come in but it’ll be the third time you’ve had me ask her in the past ten minutes” Keigo says, bending down a bit to ruffle his sons hair.

“Ok, I’ll wait!” Hayato says, jumping back into his seat outside your hospital room to show Keigo that he could be good and wait. Keigo smiles at him before going back into your room to see what you’d say.

To Hayato’s delight, Keigo comes out to tell him you said it was alright for him to come in now. Both of them enter; Hayato rushing over, quietly as not to disturb anything, to the two babies in different cribs. Two babies! He had two little brothers! One has the name Takami Tsubasa on the crib and the other is named Takami Kaito.

“Twins!? They both look like you, papa!” Hayato whisper yells, looking over at both of you. “This one looks a bit more like you” He continues, looking over at you and pointing to the one that seemed to have got your hair.

You smile at him, motioning him over. “Can I hold them?” Hayato asks you, crawling into the hospital bed with you. “Let the babies rest, Haya” You say, not acknowledging your sons pout.

“Hey birdy, you think all of our children are gonna get my wings?” Kei asks, snickering a bit. Hayato had been born with the same quirk as his father, and it seemed that Tsubasa and Kaito did as well. Although Tsubasa’s wings were a more pastel red than Keigo’s.

“I hope not, I’m gonna be raising three sons who all have the ability to fly” You say to Keigo, laughing a bit at your own words. Even if you knew it would be stressful sometimes, you loved your boys and you love Keigo even if it took a while to get to were you are now.

“Don’t worry, baby bird. I’m sure the next one will be a girl. And maybe she won’t have my quirk” Keigo says, reaching over to push back some of your hair.

“Wait- the next one?”

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵ Thank you for reading, darling!!

[ijustwant2write]

Causing A Fuss-Anthony Bridgerton x Reader

(GIF credit to @hvitserkk​)

Masterlist

Requested by @elennox03 : Can you write an imagine where Anthony’s wife is pregnant and she’s at the very end of her pregnancy and he is trying to make her stay in bed and rest but she refuses and she’s somewhere in the house and she goes into labor and Anthony freaks out and then after the baby is born a little cute dad Anthony fluff?

Characters: Anthony Bridgerton x Reader, Hyacinth Bridgerton x Reader (sister-in-law), Violet Bridgerton x Reader (mother-in-law)

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

Warnings: Pregnancy side effects, labour, mention of blood, fluff fluff fluff

                                     *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Anthony's strides were quick as he explored the house, desperately seeking his wife. Members of staff were ambushed with questions, startled by his tone. When he didn't get the answer he wanted, he would huff and storm off again. Where was his beloved? She wasn't where she was supposed to be.

(Y/N) laid back on the sofa as Hyacinth fanned her, the pregnant woman also fanning herself. She was just too hot, she was tired and her feet felt like they had been hit with a hammer. Her shoes were on the floor, it was far too painful to be wearing them.

"Thank you so much darling." (Y/N) said to her sister-in-law.

"Is it really that bad?" Hyacinth asked.

(Y/N) wanted to say yes. Despite pregnancy being an extraordinary feeling, the emotions and connections you made with your unborn child were confusing, there were quite a few downsides; the sickness, the tiredness, not being able to fit into your dresses or shoes, as well as feeling every single type of emotion everyday. But after seeing the young girls scared face, she knew she couldn't be entirely truthful.

"No, of course not." (Y/N) smiled, sitting up slightly."It can just get a little tiring sometimes. Have you ever held a baby?"

She nodded.

"It was heavier than you imagined, hm? Well, my baby is a little heavy right now. But they will be here soon."

"I'm very excited to meet them. I can't wait to be an auntie!"

(Y/N) melted at that."You'll be an amazing auntie."

"Here you are." Anthony entered the room, relieved to see (Y/N), until he saw what state she was in."What is wrong? Hyacinth, why didn't you fetch for me sooner?"

Anthony rushed to his wife's side, snatching the fan from his sister and fanning his wife. (Y/N) was irritated whenever Anthony was like this, it was sweet that he cared, but her fuse was short. She was resting, not bed ridden.

"I am not returning to bed Anthony. I do not wish to bicker with you." (Y/N) made it clear."I am just hot, that is all."

"The doctor advised that you stay in bed for most of the day-"

"Anthony, I cannot stay cooped up all day, laying down and doing nothing. I would go simply mad. And I have spoken to friends who are or have been pregnant, none of them did that."

"They are not professionally trained."

"That doctor has never carried a baby."

"(Y/N) said it isn't that heavy." Hyacinth spoke up.

Anthony slowly turned his head to his sister. "This is a matter for the grown ups. Go and...play somewhere."

Hyacinth knew better than to argue with Anthony, rolling her eyes before leaving. (Y/N) pursed her lips at her husband's behaviour.

"Did I ever mention how amazing you are with children?"

Anthony smirked."Well, it's a bit late to be getting lessons on childcare, isn't it?"

(Y/N) giggled, taking Anthony's hand and placing it on her bump. Anthony loved touching her growing bump. It had been strange to see his wife changing shape before his eyes. He was so used to her body having run his hands over every angle, seeing it every day from the time they were married. But it made him fall even more in love with her, if that was even possible. Anthony could write a hundred pages expressing his love for his wife, and it would still never be enough.

"I still can't believe we're having a baby." he breathed out.

(Y/N) scoffed."Are you saying I've always looked like this?"

Anthony laughed."Of course not. But no matter how much you talk about such a thing, no matter how much preparation you do, it just seems surreal."

(Y/N) hummed in response, putting her hand on top of his."I've loved carrying them, but it is time for them to come out into the world."

"Still not saying whether it's a boy or girl?"

(Y/N) shook her head."I just don't feel one way about it. Not that I care about that, as long as they're healthy."

"I still say boy."

"You would."

"You just said you didn't care."

"I don't."

"(Y/N), please can you just promise me one thing?"

"Anthony, I am not staying in bed-"

"Stay by my side as much as possible. The baby is due soon and I want to ensure you are safe when the time comes."

"Oh, Anthony, I'm with you for a majority of the day anyway."

"I know but, if there are moments where I am not present, I want to have a sound mind that you are in safe hands, such as family or a member of staff."

"Well, you know I'm not going to be leaving the house, much to my annoyance. So I will be guarded all day and night."

"You're making it sound like you're a prisoner."

"I'm just being dramatic. I just want to meet our child now."

"Well, I can't deny either of those statements."

Anthony wasn't exaggerating when he said he wanted (Y/N) beside him at all times. From then on, they were seen with each other anywhere they went in the house. Anthony didn't go out as much as he did, and he instructed there always be staff in every room and corridor. She didn't mind it, however, as her due date grew closer, the more nervous she became. Unfortunately, that meant her temper was shorter, she became more snappy and tired, and she didn't want everyone constantly reminding her that she was about to give birth. (Y/N) tried so hard to not take it out on her husband, but because he was the one always beside her, he was the only person she could lash out at.

"Anthony, I'm sorry but I just need a few moments alone. I'll return soon, just...let me calm down. I'm sorry." she apologised as she walked away from him, having screamed about how frustrated she was.

She didn't hide her deep breathing as she waddled down the corridors, passing by staff that worryingly watched her. (Y/N) wanted to calm her heart rate, try and clear her mind. Feeling too many eyes on her, (Y/N) escaped into the nearest room, slamming the door shut behind her.

"(Y/N)?" Hyacinth said behind her.

(Y/N) sighed. Would she ever be alone again?

"What are you doing in my playroom? I thought you would be with Anthony."

She was playing with her dolls, three propped up in mini chairs, as was she, as they indulged in an imaginary afternoon tea. (Y/N) couldn't help but smile at that, envisioning her child playing in this room.

"Sorry darling, I just...I needed some time away from the grown ups."

"Oh, alright. Would you like to join us for tea?" she gestured to the chair beside her, causing (Y/N) to laugh.

"I don't think I would fit in that chair, even if I wasn't with child. I'll take the rocking chair. You carry on darling, I'm sorry for the interruption."

Her aching feet carried her to the chair, cautiously lowering down onto it. She rocked her heels back and forth, though did so slowly in case it caused any nausea. Hyacinth continued her game as if (Y/N) wasn't there, but kept her voice quiet to be respectful. (Y/N) closed her eyes, finally feeling the stress lift for just a moment when a jolt of pain in her stomach startled her. It made her let out a cry, clutching onto her bump as she leaned forward. Hyacinth jumped at the sudden noise, suddenly frightened at the way (Y/N) sounded and looked.

(Y/N)'s breathing got faster and deeper, yelling out as an unbearable feeling coursed through her. Her hands wrapped around her torso, willing the feeling to stop. A shocked noise escaped her when she felt herself go wet in the chair, liquid dripping down her legs.

"Hyacinth, get Anthony!" (Y/N) groaned, thankful a staff member rushed in. Hyacinth didn't have to be told twice, running as quickly as she could to fetch her brother. She had never seen anyone in such a state, no one had ever mentioned this pain when having a baby. Tears were in her eyes as she finally found Anthony, who was standing with her two other brothers at the staircase.

"Hyacinth, what's wrong?" Benedict was the first to notice the little girl running towards him.

She immediately grabbed Anthony's hand, gripping tightly onto it."Quickly!"

"What's happened?" Anthony asked her her fretting.

"(Y/N)'s having the baby!"

A second of silence passed before Anthony sprinted in the direction his sister came from. He only had to follow the sound of screaming to find his wife. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen, she was meant to be upstairs in a comfortable position, surrounded by women staff that were prepared. He halted in the doorway when he saw her clutching onto the servant's arm as she struggled to stand from the chair. He snapped an order at another servant who followed him. The doctor had to get here as soon as possible, and the other students needed to prepare immediately.

"It's alright my love, I'm here. The doctor is on his way." Anthony reassured her as he took her other arm.

"I'm in so much pain Anthony." she wept."I can't do it, I can't do it, I don't have control over my own body. I'm frightened!"

Anthony's heart was shattering into a million pieces seeing his wife like this. He couldn't do anything to help. He couldn't ease the pain. If he could, he would take all of the pain she had and endure it himself. Anthony was a mix of emotions; fear for his wife, excitement to meet his child, terrified at (Y/N)'a reactions and noises. It was all too much, nothing would have prepared him for this.

"Anthony, you must leave!" Violet suddenly appeared.

"Mama, I can't leave her-"

"You wouldn’t want to see this Anthony. Go wait for the doctor, we all know what we’re doing here.”

Anthony knew of the steps to take in this event, it was not proper for a man to be present during the ordeal of birthing. But the love for (Y/N) was urging him to stay and protect her, that was what he was supposed to do as a husband, not abandon her. They went through everything together. Now he was being told to leave because of societies rules.

Benedict and Colin were able to pull away Anthony easier than they thought, due to him being frozen and confused about what he should do. He only registered that (Y/N) was calling for him after they left the room. Fighting against his brothers hold, he ignored their please for him to stop. They didn’t understand. They weren’t married, they had no idea what it was like to be bonded with someone in this way. However, he knew they were right, he had to stay away. All he could do now was help her from outside of the room.

“Where is the doctor?!” he demanded to know from the nearest servant.

“H-he has b-been called upon, Lord Bridgerton.” they stuttered.

“As soon as he arrives, he is to be brought here, quickly! Gather pillows, as many as you can, and blankets, we must ensure my wife is as comfortable as she can be. She should have been giving birth in a bed!”

Benedict and Colin stood back in silence, shocked by the quick turn around in their brother’s behaviour. They didn’t dare say anything in case they were snapped at. 

(Y/N) was clinging onto Violet’s hand as she screamed, hating the way her body had taken over and she couldn’t take back control. Violet remained calm, knowing that (Y/N) could do this. She had birthed all of her children with no complications, she knew how much women had to endure, so Violet was equipped with the necessary grit and vigour to help her daughter-in-law. (Y/N) was grateful to have Violet there.

A gruelling eight hours passed, filled with (Y/N) screaming, crying, cursing, pleading and begging for Anthony. It took every ounce of his willpower to not dash back to her, he would never forgive himself for this. He wished he could change the rules so he could be beside her. He paced with a strong drink in his hand for those eight hours, his brothers sitting down, trying to support him. However, it was getting late, and they found themselves struggling to keep their eyes open. Anthony had got rid of his jacket, sleeves rolled up and shirt buttons undone as he got warm, fretting over what was happening to (Y/N). 

“Lord Bridgerton!” a servant exclaimed as they entered the room, trying to stay composed. 

The men perked up, suddenly awake. Anthony noticed the servant was smiling, which made him relieved.“What is it?”

“Lady Bridgerton has given birth.”

Anthony didn’t need to hear anything else. He instantly ran to where his poor wife had been in labour. Hyacinth would never step foot in that room again. He pushed past anyone that got in his way, halting at the open doors to the playroom. The first thing he saw was blood, a lot of it, alarmed at the sight. But as he entered the room, it was forgotten about when he saw (Y/N)’s grin aimed at the baby wriggling around in her arms. His steps were slow as he approached, scared that he would disturb the peace that had finally fallen in this room. 

“Anthony.” (Y/N) breathed out, clearly exhausted. 

“I’m sorry.” was all Anthony could manage, eyes still fixed on his child. 

“For what?”

“For not being here.”

“You’re here now, and I understand darling. Now come meet your son.”

Anthony’s eyes widened.“I-I have a son? We have a baby boy?”

The doctor who had been crouched beside (Y/N) smiled at the Lord, standing to give the couple their space.“Yes, Lord Bridgerton, you’re now a father and have a son, who is very healthy, just like his mother.”

Violet also backed away, beaming down at her eldest son. She had never imagined him married and settled down so quickly, she expected to have many more years of her son fooling around with women not of a certain standard. Once (Y/N) waltzed in, Violet had seen a change in Anthony, and hope was restored in the Viscount.

“He’s finally here.” (Y/N) smiled as Anthony sat beside her.

“He really is.” one of his arms wrapped around her shoulders, whilst the other supported her arms holding the baby.“You’re amazing. You did this (Y/N).”

“We did it.”

“No, no, you did this all by yourself. I’ll be with you every time form now on.”

“Every time? How many are you planning to have?”

He chuckled.“We’ll discuss that later.”

(Y/N) giggled, gently kissing the top of their baby’s forehead. Anthony couldn’t stop smiling, repeating (Y/N)’s actions to her. He had never envisioned this, he didn’t want to be trapped in this life at first. He had so many responsibilities dumped on him after his father died, he wanted to make sure his family was secure and have the freedom for himself; until he met (Y/N), and suddenly, he could see his entire future planned in front of him with this woman. He never fathomed that his heart could give anymore love for anyone else in this world, and he had been proven wrong. (Y/N) was the love of his life, as was his son, and he would protect and cherish them for the rest of his life. 

[inmyblueparadise]

The 6th member of One Direction

Headcanon: being the sixth member of 1d (Imagine One Direction x reader)

Hi ! I'm not confortable in my English (it's not my first language) so I decided to make a list to start :) hope you like it ! Don't hesitate to send me suggestions !

P2 

- You auditioned for the XFactor in 2010.

- You decided to audition with Just A Dream by Nelly

- Three yes's and you were going to bootcamp (Louis W believed that you were too young because you were "only" 16) (jokes on you Louis)

- At bootcamp you met a very loud and smiling blond boy, who was always walking around with a guitare

- "Hi there I'm Niall" "Hi ! I'm Y/N ! I love your hair !"

- You became great friends !

- Unfortunately you were not picked to go to the judge's houses

- Your world collapsed. and you were crying a lot, you coudn't even speak to the camera who was filming backstage

- You were almost at the parking door when a member of the staff caught you and told you to go on the stage

- On stage you were standing next to the girls, until Simon ask you to move

- "Y/N could you please go stand next to the guys ? Yeah that's better"

- And the rest is history (ahah see what I did there ?)

- Niall introducing you to the rest of the band

- "Guys ! This is Y/N !" "Hi !"

- Swimming in Marbella with Louis and being there when he cut his foot

- Taking him back to shore and reassuring him

- "You're gonna be fine Lou, don't worry !" "But it hurt !"

- Being a mess when you actually got through to the live shows

- Hugging the guys and Liam and Niall pushing you in the pool, and then them jumping in

- Singing every week, with your best friends

- Taking care of Harry when he got sick

- Crying very hard when you didn't get to go to the final, but smiling when you heard Zayn "This is not the end of One Direction"

- Seeing the popularity of the band explode after that, and not really be ready

- Luckily you had your best friends with you

- Spending countless nights laughing and eating sweets

- Helping Liam take care of the others, and them nicknaming you Angel because of that

- "Come on Zayn you need to wake up, they are waiting for you in the recording booth" "But I just want to sleeeeeeep" "I know love but I got you coffee ?" "You are the best !!!!"

- The fans losing it when Louis let that slip in an interview

- "Angel can you pass me the water ?" "Louis did you call Y/N angel ?" "Oh yes, that her nickname, she is our little angel"

- Getting lost with Niall searching for food

- "Oh god ! Are we locked in the kitchen ???" "Well at least we found the food !" "Jesus Liam is going to kill us ! Oh well, pass me the marshmallow !"

- Pranking everybody with Louis

- Movie nights with Harry, crying, watching Love Actually

- Recording session for the first album

- "Yassss Y/N ! You go girl !"

- Being on a tour bus with 5 boys

- "Guys, what is that smell ?" "Sorry Angel" "Jesus get dressed, I don't want to see that at 7am !"

- Answering twitter questions on stage

- Jumping in the crowds with Louis, and getting yelled at by Paul

- Getting a lot of hate online because of the fact that you were the only girl in the band

- The guys defending you every time

- "Y/N is like our little sister, she is a big part of the band, and we love her"

- Lux calling you aunty Angel, and only wanting to be in your arms

- Releasing a second album, and it being an even bigger success

- Shooting This Is Us on tour

- "We are touring, and writing and recording, when do I get to sleeeeeep" "I know angel, go sleep and I'll wake you up"

- Hugs hugs hugs and more hugs when you guys are feeling homesick

- Writing Don't Forget were you Belong

- Writing Strong with Louis after being bullied online

- "That what we are without you, love, weaker, cause you make us strong"

- Being caught in a Lilo water fight on stage and then getting revenge

- Laughing when Liam falls because of the water

- "ahaha that's what you get for putting water everywhere !"

- Long conversation with Zayn about being stressed and feeling anxious

- Airports, lots and lots of airports

- Being pushed around by paparazzi and getting injured

- The guys were so angry they latched out

- "Who the f*ck do you think you are ?" "Get the f*ck out you c*nt !" "Angel are you okay ?"

- Defending your boys on Twitter against ThE WanTed

- "Fragile masculinity at its finest." "Oh I got more balls than you boy" "Oh wait.. I can't hear you with MSG screaming our name..Nevermind" "If I'm such a child what is your man doing in my DM's ? #Ithinkhewannabewaymorethanfriends"

- The fans setting the hashtag #Y/Nprotectingherboys #DamnY/N

Should I do a Part 2 ?

[fwkei]

Remember...?

Draken x fem!reader (mainly fluff slight angst)

Finally got my first request yall 🥳 I couldn’t strictly follow the request like i wanted to but i hope thats alright, the gist is still there. anyways thank you sm for it and i hope you enjoy 

TW/CW: Mentions of sex, mentions of alcohol, mentions of sex work

WC: 7k (omg the most ive ever written🙆🏻‍♀️)

Note: I changed my writing style a bit for this request so i hope yall don’t mind! and again i dont read my stuff over so my apologies if theres any mistakes lmao

------------------------------------

You sat on the street, overheating as you watched the ‘heat waves’ coming off the ground. You held your hair up with one of your hands since you had nothing to tie it with, while the other held a lukewarm water bottle. You sighed, you felt so anxious and frustrated.

What now?  

You thought letting your mouth part due to your heavy breathing 

You took things too fast. It had been about 3 weeks since you left your parents ‘home’ and why did you leave? Well there were a number of reasons that are a bit too much to list, but all that matters now is that you’re completely and utterly on your own. 

You only managed to scavenge small jobs here and there to get some money to buy some basic necessities but nothing more. 

“Sorry Y/n, my niece is coming down to Tokyo and I told her she could have a job here and stay at the studio above...I’m gonna have to let go. I’m sorry.” said your boss to you only a couple hours ago, with pity filled eyes 

“...No it’s fine really! I understand.Thank you for taking me in while you could.” you said bowing your head at the man, biting your inner cheek trying to keep a level head 

“I’m happy you understand. You can leave your apron and hat on the cashier. On your way out.” he said patting your shoulder as you slowly brought your head up 

“Right..” you said taking off your apron and hat as you walked slowly to the cashier, placing it down 

You brought your hands to your temples out of stress, trying to figure out what you could do now. You only had very little money, and there was a heat wave striking Japan this week. At least your boss allowed you to live and pay rent in the small studio right above his store, which had an AC, but now that was for his niece.  

This had been the first time in a while where you had no idea what to do. You had always been the type of person to be able to take care of yourself and your problems..on your own. All your life since you can remember, you always had to be the one to take care of others, not that you mind or minded...but you were only so young. You never really had a childhood, at least not that you can remember. You do remember cleaning up after your parents who lost all will just to even... parent. You remember taking jobs as a babysitter at a really young age in your apartment complex to make some money.. You remember being the reliable older kid of your school and complex, where kids would come to you asking for help with things like homework all the way to buying something for them to eat because they were hungry. Not once did you ever say no, because you really did want to be there for those kids who’s parents didn’t give them the care they needed. But it just became too much.. You ended up spending all of your saved up money on them, just so they could have something to play with or something to eat. 

Before you even realized it, you were in your last year of high school, with no money saved over, no scholarships, no one to rely on but yourself. Not even a friend. Was it really the right thing to do? Use all your money that you worked so hard for to help kids he lived next door? Or just plain stupid? You knew you couldn't support them forever...but you tried so hard to. All you wanted was to give them a childhood they never had, and someone to look up too. But now you left them. All because you were frustrated. You felt so unbearably guilty. All the work you put into your studies to get at least some type of scholarship just went to waste because you couldn't handle your life anymore. You were being so so so stupid. 

Before you even knew it, the sun was going down, and you grew even more tired and sleepy. You signed, taking a jacket out of your bag and placing it on the ground so you could rest your head on it. You brought your hands to cushion your cheek as your eyes started to close. The air finally got a little cooler making it easier to breathe and well...do anything. 

As you were falling asleep you could hear chatter and laughing, and finally a tap on your shoulder waking you up. You cringed your eyes before opening them up more to see 2 women. One had blonde hair and the other had pinkish hair. They looked older than you, maybe in their 20’s. One held a bag and the other held a bottle of wine with two glasses, they bent down so their heads could be closer to yours. After examining you for a bit they turned to each other and smiled happily before turning back their gaze to your confused face. 

“Hey?” you said sitting up more, a little startled by the intimate contact they were giving you 

“Hey there, say...what’s a pretty girl like you sleeping on the street for?” asked the girl with pinkish hair that was tied into pigtails 

“I uh..don’t have a place right now so..” you said scratching your head 

“Really? Hmmm.” said he one with blonde hair 

“How old are you? And what’s your name? I think we can help you out! Woman to woman!” said the pink haired girl smiling sweetly making you feel fuzzy at their niceness 

“18, and it’s Y/n.” you said smiling nervously 

“Nice to meet you Y/n, I’m Remi, this is Rema, my twin sister.” said the pink haired girl pointing to the blonde as she waved sweetly 

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you too..!” you said bringing your hands to your thighs smiling 

“So did you just turn 18?” asked Rema 

“Sorta, 2 months ago, why?” you asked 

“Oh good!” they both said 

“Well, it’s your choice really. One of the girls left today, and the boss sent us to scout another girl to take her place, buttt we just went to buy food with no intentions of finding someone but luckily we just found you! It’s perfect!” said Remi 

“Oh? What work?” you asked getting excited 

“Oh silly, we live in a brothel! It’s really not all that bad you know, great pay and rooms...so what do you think?” asked Rema 

“A brothel..” you said under your breath 

Your mind was in a serious state of concentration. 

It can’t be all that bad, right? You just have to please people and go on with your day so… that’s what i've been doing my whole life… plus… there's a bunch of women in those things right? I probably won't get too much attention from customers if there's sweethearts like Remi and Rema walking around...so...just for the time being… I think it could really work out in my favor. 

You thought to yourself 

You brought your head up, giving the girls a closed eyes smile before shaking your head ‘yes’ making them jump in excitement. 

“Oh good!” yelled Remi grabbing your hands 

“I’m so excited! We haven't had a new girl in years! How do you think Ken will react?” asked Rema smiling as you 3 all started to walk 

“Ken?” you asked furrowing your eyebrows at the familiar name 

“Oh right, We’ll have to introduce you to him and everyone else tomorrow. He’s the bosses foster kid..I think you two are actually the same age.” said Rema bringing her pointer finger to her chin 

“Mhm mhm! Oh and since you're new, tomorrow I will take your pictures for the board, you can borrow one of my sets till you can afford to buy one for yourself, how does that sound Y/n?” asked Remi smiling and holding your hand 

“It sounds..great! Thank you so much.” you said bowing your head slightly 

“No worries! Hopefully the boss will take you in.” said Remi patting your head 

“Yeah..” you said as you 3 continued to walk to the brothel 

You couldn't seem to get your mind off of that familiar name..Ken? You swore you knew someone named that. It definitely wasn't a popular name so it’s not like you knew it from some type of T.V program.. After thinking hard your whole way to your new home you couldn't seem to remember them. The person named Ken. And so you decided to brush it off for the time being. 

The brothel was pretty big, and consisted of 12 girls, not including yourself. It was really late so everyone was asleep. Remi and Rema showed you to your room which was much more spacious than your room at home. They told you that you were allowed to decorate it and style it however you wanted. But they told you it was important to know that this was the room where business would be done, and not to leave important things around since some of the men came into brothels for the sole purpose of stealing. Remi even told you a story about how one of her clients tried to steal one of her panites, but then the boy named Ken stopped him by knocking him out with one punch to the stomach.   

“He sounds strong-” you laughed as they gave you a small tour 

“He sure is! Like the bodyguard of this place! He’s a sweetheart!” said Remi smiling 

“I’m sure..!” you smiled 

“Alright that’s about it, you should shower now and get ready for tomorrow. The boss will probably wanna take a look at you before seeing if he wants you. But I'm sure he will! You're pretty so it’ll go smoothly!” said Remi handing you her shower stuff for you to use for tonight and a set 

“Got it, and again...thank you so much. I really appreciate it.” you said again 

“Of course! Remember..we’re neighbors so feel free to knock whenever you need something..Also I can give you some tips before your first client so you know what to do.” she said smiling 

“Right, goodnight then!..” you said feeling your face get hot at how she so easily talked about sex. 

After that, you did exactly as she said, you showered. You thoroughly washed your body, face, and hair. Getting out you looked down at the set Remi gave you. It was just a black bra and matching panties with a silk cover up which made you feel better knowing you could cover up with that.  

You rubbed your mouth as you started to rethink your decision. I mean...you respected sex workers..but was this life what you were willing to settle for? Aimlessly waiting around for some random horny man to choose you and do things with you just for you to get only 40% of the payment? Was this all really worth it? Leaving home to avoid your problems...to end up here? You were grateful, yes, Remi and Rema were so sweet and open with you. You could only hope that the others were just as nice. You really wanted things to go well, and that can only start with some good rest. 

You woke up to a knock on your door, to see Remi and Rema walking in with a smile 

“Morninggg!” they sang as you quickly got out of bed 

“Hi!” you said frantically 

“No need to rush! Usually men start coming in at 10, but since you don't work here officially yet you got to sleep in a bit! But the boss called for you, you should go to the set up room down the hall to get ready, remember it?” asked Rema 

“Yeah I do. Thank you for waking me-!” you said smiling and grabbing your stuff and shoes 

“Course, good luck Y/n!” they said as you quickly walked out of your room to get ready 

As you walked in, there were a few other girls getting ready. You smiled and introduced yourself to them, and them to you. They were all so nice and pretty. It made you feel a little bit better about being here, and less nervous since they complimented your looks. You got ready in about 10 minutes, letting one of the other girls help you out with your hair and stuff like that. You gave yourself one last look in the mirror before stepping out and waving to the girls ‘bye.’ 

You nervously walked to the boss's door. You took a deep breath before knocking. You heard a muffled ‘come in!’ so you walked in smiling while holding your covering close. You gave a nervous closed eyes smile before seeing his office was simple, just a desk with a bunch of papers and a chair on the other side. 

“Y/n, correct?” he asked placing down his paper and taking off his glasses to look at you

“Yes.” you said smiling 

“Pleasure-” he said leaning over the desk to shake your hand 

“Likewise.” you said smiling, shaking his hand firmly before sitting down

“Well, I’m sure Remi and Rema told you just about everything you need to know, I take 60% of your earrings, I use that stuff to pay for rent and bills for you girls and my kid… which usually takes up about 30% of that 60%, meaning you make a profit of 40, while I make only a profit of 30 per girl.” he said 

“Yeah, I was told.” you said smiling nervously fiddling with your hands

“Good good, now that that's over with..” he said getting up ad signing 

“I’m just gonna take a look at you, no need to be nervous I’m not gonna touch you or anything, so please don’t feel worried.” he said smiling 

“Right!” you said getting up 

“Alright just do a quick 360 with arms up.” he said smiling 

“Okay.” you said doing as he said 

He looked you up and down but not in a lustful way at all, it was more of like a ‘just seeing how you’ll hold up’ kinda look, almost like he was a bit worried for you. 

“Thank you-” he said sitting back down as you did the same feeling nervous

“I was also told you’re 18? Right?” he asked looking down at his papers 

“Yeah that's right.” you said 

“Well I don't usually have this talk with the other woman because they're older. I know the age of consent in Japan is 16 and blah blah, but you’re still pretty young, are you sure you wanna work like this?” he asked looked into your eyes 

“...Not entirely but it’s the best I can do right now.” you said with a determined face

“I see- we’ll then welcome, and just remember you can leave whenever you want, but give a 2 weeks notice. When Remi is done, ask her to take your picture.” he said 

“Understood, thank you!” you said said smiling and leaving   

You walked out of the room, closing the door carefully signing in relieve 

That went pretty well.

You thought 

You started to walk down the hall so that you could ask Remi to take your picture. But when you put your ear to the door, you heard lewd noises letting you know she wasn’t done just yet. It was already 5, and the brothel closes at 10. You didn’t really know what to do, so you walked over to the kitchen, sitting down at one of the stools waiting for Remi and or Rema to finish up with their work. You tapped the pen that was on the table and started to look around the kitchen. You remembered Remi told you there were snacks in the cabinets, so you got up and started to open and close them one by one to find something to eat. You finally found a cabinet filled instant ramen, you grabbed one and started to pour water into it, popping it into the microwave that was on the counter top. You stood in front of it waiting, playing with the loose strings of you covering when suddenly you heard the door open. 

“I’m home.” said the tall boy with dark hair tied back to reveal a dragon tattoo on the side of his head 

Is this Ken? 

You thought as the microwave beeped, making his eyes turn to you

You quickly shot your eyes to the microwave, hoping he didn’t notice your stare. He looked so familiar it was almost irritating how you couldn’t remember him. You took the hot cup out of the microwave, placing it down on the counter top, ignoring his presence as he walked over, placing down the plastic bag in his hand, noticing your frustrated face trying to figure out where the utensils are. 

“Left of the sink are where they are.” he said sitting down on the stool across from you after looking at your face a bit 

“Thank you.” you said smiling nervously turning around to grab a pair of chopsticks 

“Are you new here?” he asked taking out a styrofoam box from the plastic bag, opening it to reveal a hot meal of meat and rice and vegetables 

“Yeah..I was supposed to start today but I don’t have my pictures taken yet.” you said smiling turning back to mix your noodles 

“Could you grab me a pair too?” he asked realizing he forgot to take a pair of chopsticks from the restaurant 

“Sure-” you said turning back quickly to grab some for him, placing it in his hands as he gave you a soft smile making your eyes widen slightly. 

“You look familiar..” you both said at the same time making both your eyebrows raise in shock then turn into a slight scoff from the both of you 

“Glad we’re on the same page then.” he said taking a bite of his food as you did the same still standing 

“You know you can sit down, don’t feel nervous.” he said looking up you slightly 

“..yeah.” you said smiling, walking around and sitting next to him. 

“So when’d you come?” he asked turning his head slightly to see your mouth filled with noodles making him smile a bit 

“..I came by last night, really late with Remi and Rema.” you said after finishing your bite

“I see...I feel like I remember you from somewhere, can’t pinpoint it though.” he said looking back down at his food 

“Same here, and you must be Ken though, right? When I first heard your name I swore the same thing but I just can’t remember..” you said before sipping some of the broth of your soup

“Yeah, but you can call me Draken and your name?” he asked getting up to grab a napkin from across the table 

“Draken...sure! Oh right, my bad. It’s Y/n. Nice to meet you-” you said smiling holding your hand out for him to shake

He only completely shot up to look into your eyes with his wide ones. You gave him a confused look as you watched him get knocked out of his thoughts, bring his hand up to shake your hand before clearing his throat and walking back over to sit. Maybe you struck a nerve? Maybe had the same name as someone who hurt him in the past? You really didn’t know but it made you feel interested. He looked like he just had his life flash before his eyes or something. 

“Are you okay?” you asked 

“Uh yeah, I’m fine. My head just hurts a bit.” he said looking as if he was deep in thought 

“Oh? I have some tylenol in my room.. You want one? Or I can make you a cold drink, you’re probably dehydrated?” you asked smiling a bit 

Draken turned his head to look at you, his mouth was parted, and he just looked so..anxious? You couldn’t even tell, almost like congested because he wanted to say something. 

Draken felt his heartbeat quicken when he heard your name. As soon as you said it, a random memory that was buried deep in the back of his mind hit him as he quickly re-lived it. But could it really be you? The Y/n he knew from so so so long ago? Around 10 years ago? There could be no way, he remembers the girl moving to a different city..the chances were so low that it could really be you already. 

But the second you said those words.. Those words of offering to make something for him, or give him something, despite you thinking you only just met him...Made him know that it was really the Y/n he met when he was only a little boy...but how the hell did you turn up here? In a place and part of town like this? He was so confused and just wanted to ask you...but you still didn’t remember him. 

“..No I’m alright, thanks..can I ask you somethin-” said Draken before being interrupted 

“Y/n!! Come on, let's take your pictures!” yelled Remi coming out of her room waving as a man walked out too buttoning his shirt 

“Sorry, just remember what you wanted to say and tell me later.” you said smiling and standing up and walking over to Remi

Draken watched you as you walked away. He saw Remi give you a hug, and the man that was walking out checked you out to which Draken gave him a pissed off look. Making the man smile nervously, wave, and leave. 

Do you really wanna live your life like this, Y/n?

He thought to himself before packing up his trash and throwing it away

Remi took your pictures, telling you to do different poses etc, and you finally settled on one. You walked over to the front of the house to place your picture in its designated area above your name. You signed, stepping back to look at it, fixing your gaze to see Draken was walking over with his hands in his pocket, looking as he was going to leave. You saw him glance at the photo making you feel slightly embarrassed.

“Nice.” he said smiling but looking into your eyes in a way where it looked like he was concerned for you. 

Just as you were about to thank him a man walked in and started looking at you making you feel nervous. The man requested you, and so you smiled at him pointing your hand to where the showers were, as you started to walk behind him, you turned your hand giving a thumbs up to Draken with a nervously flushed face, smiling, as he he brought his hand up giving you a thumbs up with soft and concerning eyes before opening the door and leaving. It made your smile fade slightly, you’ve seen that face before from him. But not from today.. And it was all you could think about during your work. 

As you laid in your room, after work you couldn’t help but feel a little bit...stupid? You felt so unsatisfied, not because of your customers but because you just couldn’t remember. It felt like an itch you couldn’t scratch hard enough, and with every interaction you had with the boy almost felt like a tease, like the itch just became more itchy and your scratches just became more weak. Maybe if you spend more time with him, you’ll remember? 

It had been about 4 weeks, 4 weeks of saving your money, and every 4 weeks the boss collected his fair share of the cut. It wasn’t a pretty 4 weeks, it was probably the worst 4 weeks of your life. But... you and Draken would often exchange stories about your lives late at night which you enjoyed a lot. It always makes you feel better. But yet again you still couldn't figure him out. You felt as though you’ve met him before, and as though you two have had these kinds of talks before. 

Draken only grew more and more helpless, seeing how you still haven’t remembered. He was slowly watching your life crumble. He felt so angry that you settled and believed you deserved to live like this, barely scraping by. He felt so awful, and saw how you grew so tired of it all. He just so badly wanted you to remember him, so that he could once again talk to you like he did before.

You had one last customer before closing, going through your usual routine, this n that, the man offered you a drink. You stupid obliged drinking it, hoping it would make your time more enjoyable but you were wrong, so very wrong, and so very stupid for drinking that stupid drink. You remember some parts, you did your job, then it all went black.. You woke up after hearing knocking on your door. You jumped out of bed, confused. You remember seeing the man leave as you started to fall asleep but that's about it. Usually you never fall asleep after the work because you never do much, your mind started to panic. But the door opened revealing Remi smiling.

“Hey sleepy! Boss says it’s your turn, come on, get your cash!” she said smiling 

“Right let me just..it’s in my drawer..I don't know why I fell asleep so fast I think alcohol makes me sleepy.” you said getting out of bed and kneeling in front of your drawer to get the envelope of cash you had been saving.

“Heh, same here. I never accepted drinks from clients..they never had good intentions with that!” she said coming over and sitting at your bed 

“..yeah.” you said starting to feel that panic arise in your body when seeing the envelope was...gone.

“What's wrong?” asked Remi noticing you were frozen 

“I- the money..It’s gone..he took it..” you said with wide eyes feeling as though you were about to sob realizing you had just lost thousands of yen.

“Don’t say that..it..it probably just got misplaced! Come on, I'll help you look!” said Remi getting up  

You couldn't even respond because of the amount of panic you were in. Your heart was racing and you felt tears fall from your eyes. After about 15 minutes of looking, you two found nothing. Absolutely nothing. You sat on the floor with your hand over your mouth, again, trying to keep a level head. 

What now..?

You thought to yourself feeling hot tears stream from your face.

“Hey..guys? Boss is calling for you Y/n..what’s going on?” asked Rema walking in seeing you covering your face, crying 

“She was robbed by the guy who just left, he put something in her drink to knock her out while he looked around and took the money...she doesn’t have the money.” said Remi 

Rema’s mouth parted in shock and pity. 

How could you mess up something so easy? All you had to do was keep your money safe. But you even failed at that. 

“You have to tell him, Y/n.” said Rema rubbing your back

“Yea..yeah, could you two just give me a second? I’ll be right out.” you said smiling while wiping your face 

“Sure.” they said frowning and walking out 

You fisted your hands, and grabbed your covers before screaming into them to muffle your sounds..

Okay..it was a couple of thousand yen...not too bad right? I can promise the money by tomorrow..I’ll pick up some sort of street job...yeah! That’s good. Everything is fine..it’s fine.

You thought to yourself before wiping your face on more time and slapping both sides of your cheeks to wake you up.

You got up and walked to the bosses door feeling the eyes of people on your back. You knocked on the door before opening it slowly, refusing to make eye contact as you went to stand in front of the man with your arms behind your back.

“Alrighttt, let’s see here, in the last four weeks you had a total of 37 customers, so you should have around 300,000 yen, correct?” he asked looking at his paper 

“Yes.” you said still looking down

“Alright, just hand it to me so I can count and divide it, you can sit.” he said smiling holding his hand out 

“I..I don-” you said before being interrupted by a knock 

“Come in.” he said 

“Hey sorry dad, Y/n left her money with me while she went out. Thought I should bring it to her. Remember, Y/n?” said Draken walking in with an envelop in his hand smiling as he came to stand next to you, as you nodded your head ‘yes’ 

“Oh, thank you Ken.” he said smiling and taking the envelop 

Your mouth parted as you gave a confused look, Draken only smiled and gave you a thumbs up while his dad counted the money. You felt so guilty and shocked, and all you could do was just stand there, like an idiot. 

“Here you are...120,000 back..” he said, patting the money on the table to make it flat, putting it back into the envelope and handing it to you

You hesitantly brought your hand to grab it, glancing over at Draken who gave you small smile

“Thank you-” you said to him seeing Draken was already opening the door to leave 

You quickly followed after him as he walked into his room. Before entering his room he turned around and looked down at you 

You felt your eyes soften as you felt as though you were about to cry again, you tilted your head and neck down biting the inside of your cheek to keep in your cry. 

“I promise I’ll pay all of it back by tomorrow, all 300,000.” you said 

“Do you ever give yourself a break?” he asked as you brought your head up to look at him seeing he looked almost irritated 

“You didn’t even ask why I did it, you just immediately jumped to feeling guilty. And you don’t need to pay me back. Really.” he said bringing his hand to close to the door, but you stopped him by grabbing his wrist making his breath hitch 

“Why?” you asked looking into his eyes 

“You still don’t remember? Even after all this time we’ve spent together?” he asked smiling as you took your hand off his wrist 

“Remember...?” you asked furrowing your eyebrows in confusion, but then it suddenly hit you

“I swear it wasn’t me! I didn't steal!” yelled a little boy with blonde hair as two cops stood in front of him 

You tilted your head and walked closer, but still keeping your distance to hear. It was a winter day and you were on your way to the corner store to buy some snacks, but you were met with an interesting scene. You kept your hands in your pockets as you listened over to the boy screaming and pleading his innocence 

“I wouldn’t steal something so stupid! What would a kid like me need a lighter for!! I don’t know how it ended up in my pocket! Lay off!” he yelled as the officer dangled the lighter in front of his face

A lighter?

“Keep it down! We know how troubled you kids are here! Especially with those tattoos!” yelled back the cop as the boy grew angry and fisted his hands, ready to punch the cop

“Hey!!!” he heard a voice yelled 

“Hey wait a minute!” you yelled waving your hand smiling as you ran to the scene 

“Can we help you?” asked one of the cops in a soft tone 

The blonde boy grew quiet, and you saw his hands loosen as he looked at your smiling face 

“Yeah, why are you two yelling at my brother?” you asked furrowing your brows at the two grown man 

“...Your so-called brother stole a lighter from the corner store right behind you, where are your parents? We would like to have a word with them.” he said standing up straight 

“Yeah, and talk about how they let their son tattoo himself already..” said one under his breath making the other laugh 

You looked over at the boy growing angry, you gave him a smile..making him calm down.

“He said it was just an accident, I asked him to pick up a lighter from the store so that we could light a candle at our father’s grave! See!” you said digging into your bag to pull out a candle 

“He probably felt pressured because I asked him to get it, so if you’re gonna get mad at someone, get mad at me!” you said as you started to fake cry 

“It’s our father's death anniversary, and you're yelling at kids for making a mistake.” you faked cried

“Yeah!!” yelled the boy making you smile under your hands as the two officers became anxious, feeling bad for what they had just done.

“..we’re sorry. Please let us apologize.” they said slightly bowing at you two 

“I don’t think we can accept it...you two also made fun of the dragon tattoo on his head!...dragons were our dads favorite animal. He risked his life fighting for Japan and you two are laughing at him! Is that how your mother taught you how to behave?” you asked pretending to wipe you tears as the blonde boy watched you in awe seeing you toy with grown men 

“Please let us treat you both to whatever you’d like from the corner store as an apology!” they both said bowing lower making you smile and look back at the boy. You gave him a thumbs up as a smile grew on his face 

“Fine..come on then?” you said as both the officers raised their heads, opening the doors of the corner store for you both 

You and the blonde boy walked around the store, filling your baskets with all types of things. The blonde boy watched you in just pure awe as you walked around picking your favorite snacks, as he did the same, glancing at you every now and then. 

“Here.” you said smiling at the cops 

“Right!” they said frantically taking out their wallets as the boy placed down his stuff nervously, still watching you

“Oh and-” you said reaching your hand to grab the lighter from the officer and placing it into the bunch of snacks 

You smiled, your hands were behind your back as you watched the officers pay for yours and the boys' food, placing them into bags for you guys too. You grabbed the lighter and your bag, as the boy did the same 

“Mom told us to meet her at the cemetery steps, remember?” you said looking into the boys eyes

“..yeah, I remember.” he said smiling feeling his face become hot 

“Let’s go then.” you said smiling and taking his hand as you two ran out of the store 

After a bit you two stopped and sat on the curbside while you both chose a snack to eat.  

“Here’s your lighter, you don’t have to stay with me by the way.” you said handing him the steel lighter 

“..Thanks” he said 

“Sure- what do you need it for anyway?” you asked smiling 

“My boss asked for it.” he said putting it in his pocket

“Oh, are you in some type of delinquent group?” you asked looking at him 

“Yeah..” he said smiling 

“That's cool, what do you guys do?” you asked taking a sip of your drink 

“We kinda just...like...do stupid stuff and fight..” he said 

“Sounds fun, but...stupid.” you said laughing making him scoff 

“Why’d you do it?” he asked 

“Do what?” you asked back turning you gaze to him 

“Come in to cover me. You could’ve gotten in a lot of trouble because of me.” he said with a frustrated face 

“You’re right, I just wanted to, that's all.” you said smiling making his mouth part and cheeks redden

“You seem pretty fun too so I thought we could be friends or something..” you said nervously 

“Yeah! Sure- We can be friends!” he said happily making you feel flustered 

“Well then, it’s nice to meet you, my name is Y/n, yours?” you asked holding over your hand 

“Ken, but you can call me Draken-” he said taking ahold of your hand gently as you gave him a closed eyed smile blushing 

“where the hell did you find that candle and com up with that whole sob story Y/n?”

“Dunno, I saw the candle on the ground by a newspaper, I kinda just winged it- “

After that day you remember hanging out with Draken almost every other day. You remember him telling you how he and his close friends started their own gang and needed some sort of funding, and so you gave it to him, on his birthday.

“I saved up! You said that you and your friends needed some money to start off so that you guys could buy a flag or banner? Right? Well, here’s 30,000 yen for your birthday!” you said handing him an envelope and a small balloon.

“Are-are you serious right now Y/n?” he asked taking the gifts, opening the envelope to look inside to see the money as his eyes lit up 

“Yeah, I babysit more kids now so I was able to put some aside for you.” you said smiling satisfied with his reaction 

He didn’t even say anything, all he did was bring his arms around you upper body, hugging you tight making you laugh as you brought yours to hug him back 

“Thank you- you’re the best! The guys will be so happy!” he said smiling while grasping your wrists in excitement. Your eyes traced over his face as they soften. You smiled. 

“Likewise.” 

And- after that, you remember the day you 2 separated as friends. You both sat on the curbside, you remembered you called him to come and see you. It was a winter night and the sun was going down. 

“I uh..well I don’t really know how to say this without sounding cliche but-”

“What? Are you gonna confess that you’re madly in love with me or something?” he asked grinning, making you sweat drop 

“Jeez be quiet...I’m trying to make this a memorable moment-” you signed smiling, placing your palms on the cold cement 

“Alright let’s hear it then Y/n-!” he said bringing his hands to the back of his head as he laid down looking up at the stars 

You only frowned slightly, you shifted your position so that you could sit beside him and have a good look at his face. 

“You’re scaring me..” he said jokingly making you smile 

“It was really fun the past year.” you said smiling as Draken shot his head up to look at you face to face 

“The hell are you talking like that for?” he asked furrowing his brows 

“My parents can’t afford living in any districts in Tokyo anymore, so we’re moving to another city… about 4 hours train ride from Tokyo so-” you said looking down at your hands on the floor

“So? You act like I won't be able to come and see you or you come and see me..” he said ducking his head a bit so that you could look at him 

“Draken, train tickets are about 220 yen per person, I can't afford it, and if you came by to see me I'd feel guilty because you’d be wasting your money just to only see me for like an hour.” you said 

“How can I be wasting my money on you? It’s not wasting if I wanna do it and see you, plus what makes you think it'll only be a couple hours?” he asked 

“I’ll have to start working once we get there, so I wouldn’t have anytime...I wanna start saving so that one day I can come back to Tokyo and live here, so that I can see your dream come true of helping your friend create a ‘new era of delinquents’ you know? I’ll even help you guys if you want with financial stuff or something.” you said smiling at him 

Draken bit the inside of his cheek. He wanted to tell you so bad how he felt but..

“Look, I have a feeling I know what you’re gonna say..just remember what you wanted to say and tell me later, okay?” you said placing your hand on top of his causing his eyes to widen 

“...You’ll remember me, right?” he asked looking into your eyes deeply making your mouth part 

“Yeah, I’ll remember you as long as you remember what you wanted to tell me. Cause I feel the same” you said smiling as a tear fell from your eyes 

“good...I will.” he said smiling back and tilting his head and wiping it off your face

After the memories hit you, you stood there with wide eyes and tears, with your wrist covering your quivering mouth. You had completely suppressed your memories of Draken, and your feelings because you knew you wouldn't be able handle being apart from him for so long. And he did the same. You couldn’t imagine how unbearable it was for him to be waiting up like this. You looked up at him seeing his eyes were softly looking at you. You could do nothing but bring your arms around him hugging him, as he brought his arms around you to do the same. You were still such in shock. 

“I never thought you’d end up in a place like this, living a life like this.” he said against your ear 

“I don’t wanna see you like this, please let me take care of you like you did for me..” he said said tightening his grip slightly  

You could only cry at his words, you didn’t even wanna try to speak because you knew it would only come out as a sob. Was it really alright for you to rely on someone so much?

He pulled back from the hug and looked at your face, seeing you were still crying as you nodded your head ‘yes’, he smiled and wiped them away with his thumb. The smile on his face...he looked so satisfied...and happy...happy that you finally remembered. Finally remembered him.

[kywaslost]

How they help with sensory overload/panic/anxiety attack

Requests are open!

Warnings: mentions of sensory overload and panic/anxiety attacks, abuse

 All of class 1-A were sitting in the common room, some watching a movie while others were talking loudly. Normally you would be joining in the chatter, talking about the day’s training and classes, even helping todoroki and some of the other students make dinner. But today was different. Your anxiety was through the roof. The past few days have been filled with tests and exams from all of your teachers. It was nearing finals as well, causing you to lose sleep so you could study. It didn’t help that you hadn’t slept in two days due to stress and anxiety and that you had to do one-on-one battles with your classmates that morning. 

Right now you were silently following your boyfriend Bakugou around. He was going to go get a drink, getting up from his seat next to the bakusquad. You stood up and followed him, walking really close to his back.

“Hey,” Bakugou barked, not knowing it was you that was behind him. When he saw a glimpse of your hair and felt your head lean against his back, his face softened. “Oh, sorry,” he apologized under his breath. He turned and wrapped an arm around your shoulder. “If you wanted a drink you could have just said so, I would get you one.” You leaned into his side and walked with him. The lights were getting really bright. The song changed, blasting in your opinion. You buried your head in Bakugou’s side to try to at least muffle the sound a little. He poured two cups of water and handed one to you. The two of you sat back down and you cuddled really close to the blond headed boy. After a few minutes you buried your head closer to him. Bakugou noticed and grew agitated.

“Oi,” he growled quietly. “What is your problem? Are you--” he noticed how you flinched away from his growing voice. He also noticed how you covered your eyes from the dim lights in the room. He sighed, setting down his cup of water. He pulled you to his lap and pressed your head to his chest. He covered your ears and shielded your eyes. The two of you stayed that way until Bakugou carried you to your dorm. He stayed with you until you fell asleep.

You had a lot in common with your father Shota Aizawa. You were quiet, always tired, but also very smart. You didn’t like loud noises and they scared you to be honest. If you didn’t get away from the noise or it didn’t go away you’d start to shake. The reason was understandable, of course. It was simple. When you were only six months old your mother was killed in a villian attack. As Aizawa fought the villain that killed your mother Present Mic saved you and got you out of harm’s way. Both you and Aizawa were devastated. As a fact, you were selectively mute. You would only talk to your father and Uncle Mic. That was far as it went. 

Your friends never understood why you never spoke a word. You were in class 1-A under your father’s teaching. You had one friend going into that class and it was Izuku Midoriya. He was with you ever since the very first day of school when you were kids. He understood that you didn’t speak and would stand up for you when the other kids in class 1-A kept trying to get you to talk. It was several months into the school year and you were in Present Mic’s English class. He was naturally a loud person due to his quirk but he always tried to tone it down when you were in his class.

There were two doors in Present Mic’s classroom; one in the front and one in the back. You just so happened to sit next to the one in the back. At the moment Mic wasn’t really teaching. There were only ten minutes left of class and Mic decided to let the rest of the time be spent however the students wished. Right now the bakusquad were goofing off and laughing. The room was starting to get loud. You looked around the room, taking in all of the noise.

“Hey mute mouth!” You turned your head to the source of the yelling. Bakugou was sitting on top of a desk, staring at you. Your body started to tremble, becoming afraid of all the noise in the room. You slowly turned your head to the side as if asking him what he wanted. “What in the world is wrong with you?” By this time you could barely catch your breath. Your trembling got worse. Now the room was silent as everyone was looking at you.

“Y/N?” Present Mic called from his desk. “Are you alright?” You didn’t even spare him a look when you raced out the back door of the classroom and down the hall. It was empty, quiet since classes were still in session. You slowly slid down a wall to the floor, curling into a ball. You shook terribly, starting to scream and cry. 

“Hey, kiddo, whoa you’re ok,” a voice said from beside you. “It’s me, Uncle Mic. Do you mind if I touch you?” You continued to scream as doors opened and teachers poked their heads out into the hall. When they saw Mic shooing them into their rooms with his hands they closed their doors and continued on with their classes. Mic slowly wrapped his arms around your shaking frame. He pulled you to him and rested his chin on your head.

“It’s ok kiddo,” he whispered uncharacteristically. “Just breathe ok?” He sat there with you until your screaming ceased and your breath was steady again. He smiled, “Hey, there we go!”

“Too loud,” you muttered. “Way too loud.”

“I know little eraser. I’m sorry. I’ll try to keep it quiet next time.”

When Kirishima first met Bakugou he never would have thought he would be dating the blonde boy’s sister. Your quirk was just like Bakugou’s only you shot ice explosions instead of fire and instead of sweating nitroglycerin, frost would coat your skin in very thin layers.

Kirishima always offered to help you with your quirk. While you could practice your attacks Kirishima could test his hardening skills. Another thing Kirishima did was understand you had bad anxiety. You never told your brother but when he was kidnapped, you were petrified. You loved him as much as you never admitted and you were afraid you wouldn’t see him again. That’s what made you transfer to the hero course at UA. You had the chance to keep an eye on your brother and learn how to save people from the very thing that happened to Bakugou.

You and Kirishima had just gotten back to the dorms from a sparring practice you two held after school. Once you had showered and eaten you two were in his room, relaxing. He was sitting at the desk in his room, scrolling through the internet on his computer. You were laying on his bed asleep. He looked across the room and smiled softly when he noticed you were cuddled up with one of his pillows. You were hidden by his blankets and warm in his hoodie as your face was buried in the pillow.

That’s adorable, Kirishima thought as he pulled his phone out and took a picture before he turned back to his computer. He sat in silence for a few moments when he heard very soft whimpering coming from his bed. It was almost inaudible, it was so silent.

“Baby?” the red head called softly. He turned back around to face the bed again, trying to see where the noise was coming from. He saw your sleeping form twitching from time to time, face plastered with looks of fear. Kirishima worriedly stood from his seat across the room and made his way over to you quickly. He sat beside you and rested his hand on your shoulder, turning you on your back. You continued to whimper and started to mutter.

“No,” you whispered. Kirishima pulled your back to his chest and held you there with one arm as his other hand ran though your hair calmingly. 

“Hey,” he whispered. “It’s ok. You need to wake up ok?” Kirishima had to tighten his grip as you started to thrash around harder. You started to cry in your sleep, gripping the arm that was wrapped around you tightly. Kirishima continued to smooth your hair and whisper to you to wake you up. 

You gasped through tears as your eyes shot open. Kirishma shushed you quietly, still attempting to calm you down. “Hey, it’s ok little rock. You’re alright.” You struggled to catch your breath, still shaking.

“Kiri!” you gasped, trying to pry the arms away from you. Kirishima picked up on what was going on and let go, sliding off the bed and kneeling so he was eye level with you.

“Oh,” he said quickly. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t think it would get this bad.” You sat up and pulled at the collar of Kirishima’s hoodie. He could see the panic in your eyes. “Hey, it’s ok. Do you want me to help you take that off?” You didn’t hear him, still pulling the fabric from your body. “I’m going to take that off ok?” Kirishima gently pulled the fabric from your hands and over your head, leaving you in your black t-shirt you had been wearing. 

“Let’s calm your breathing little rock,” he said with a soft smile. “Can I hold your hand?” You nodded frantically as he gently took your right hand in his. He placed it to his chest. “Feel that? Feel my breathing? Try to match me ok?” It took ten minutes for him to get your breathing to slow. 

“Is it ok if I hold you?” You nodded again as the red-head slid in beside you and pulled you into his lap. “You’re still shaking,” he muttered. “Do you want some water?” He pulled a bottle off the nightstand, opening it and handing it to you. He pressed it to your lips and tilted it so the cool liquid fell through your lips. You took a few sips before pulling away. You took a shaky breath and wrapped your arms around Kirishama’s waist. Kirishima pulled you close and held you tight until your shaking ceased.

“Do you feel any better?” the boy whispered quietly.

“Hmhm,” you hummed and buried your head in his chest. “Thank you Kiri.” You leaned up and pecked his lips. “I’m sorry.” Kirishima frowned, pulling your face to look at him.

“Don’t be sorry love,” he said softly. “You can’t control these things. I’d do this 100x over if it meant you would be ok in the end. I hope I don’t have to, because this isn’t good for you, but I will if I have to.” A tear fell from your eyes and Kirishima wiped it away. “Can you tell me what triggered this?” You looked away.

“I dreamed of Katsuki being kidnapped again.” Your voice was quiet. Kirishima rested his chin on your head.

“I’m sorry baby.”

 Deku was the most observant person you had ever met. He noticed everything within a matter of seconds. This meant a lot to you. You were quiet by nature, only ever really talking to people you were close to. This included Midoriya, Todoroki, Bakugou, and Kirishima. You would exchange a few words with the rest of your classmates but that was as far as it went. Izuku always noticed when you were getting too anxious or tired. He knew how to calm you down and make you feel comfortable. 

This was one of those days he had to use that knowledge. You were having a day with Todoroki, Iida, Ochako, and Deku. The five of you were walking through the mall, window shopping. It was more of a friends day than a shopping day since all you all did was talk with each other. You all were eating lunch in one of the many dining areas in the mall. It was nearing the busiest part of the day as the crowds of people grew and the noise got louder. This didn’t get past without you noticing. You started to flinch whenever a particularly loud noise came from the crowd.

“Are you alright Y/N?” Todoroki asked over his bowl of cold soba. “You look frightened.” 

You shook your head and said quietly, “I’m fine.” Deku noticed this. He took your arm gently and pulled you to your feet.

“We’ll be back,” he said quickly, pulling you away from your friends and to a quiet, secluded part of the mall. He sat you down and sat beside you, wrapping his arms around you. “Hey,” he whispered quietly. “It’s too loud isn’t it?” You nodded as the boy pulled your head to his chest to try and hide you from the noise and light.

“The lights are too bright,” you whispered. Deku hid your face more.

“I know. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let Ochako drag you out here.”

“It’s fine.” The two of you sat like that until you calmed down. “Let’s go find the others,” you said as you sat up. As you made your way back to the table, Todoroki bumped into you.

“Oh, there you are,” he said as he steadied you. “Are you alright?” You nodded.

“I’m alright,” you whispered. “It was just getting too loud and bright.” The boy nodded as he walked with you and Deku, each of the boys having an arm wrapped around you.

When Shinsou started UA, he swore he wasn’t there to make friends. He kept true to his word, or at least until you showed up. You were accepted later in the year since the school sent you an invite once they noticed you would do well in their school. You were in class 1-C. Your quirk would do well in that class, but most of your classmates didn’t agree.

Your quirk was mental drawing, meaning you could draw what the people around you were thinking. Most of the kids in your class didn’t like your quirk; they thought it wasn’t fitting for a hero. This caused you to keep to yourself and not talk to anyone. This only added on to the torture.

You were sitting at your desk before English class as you doodled on a piece of scrap paper. You sat in the back corner of the class by the window. This way, you got the best lighting and the best view. You stared at your paper absentmindedly as your pencil slid across the paper. It started with small lines here and there but then developed into the shape of a person. You were working on the other eye when a group of classmates caught your attention.

“Hey mute girl!” someone called out. You looked up with shy eyes, hiding your face behind your hair. You turned your head to the side slightly, acknowledging their presence. There were three of them, all towering over your desk. The one in the middle ripped the paper from beneath your hand.

“Hey!” you said, reaching for the drawing. “Give that back!” The men laughed, hovering over the paper and pointing at certain spots, laughing even harder.

“This is your quirk?!” The one on your right laughed. “Seriously, this sucks.”

The one on the left spoke,” You’re never going to make it big here.”

“What’s your problem?” spat a voice from behind the boys. The three turned around.

“You!” they scoffed, laughing. Immediately, they fell silent and stiff. You looked around them to see Shinsou Hitoshi staring at them.

“Give the girl her paper back,” commanded the man. The boy with your drawing placed it back down on your desk. “Apologize.”

“We’re sorry,” the three said in a monotone voice. The man with purple hair smirked. “Now act like the chickens you are until class starts.” The three boys started clucking, running around the classroom. You giggled, watching them embarrass themselves. The man controlling them sat down at the desk beside you. 

“Thank you,” you whispered to the man.

“Don’t mention it,” he grumbled. “They deserve everything they get.”

“You’re name’s Shinsou Hitoshi, right?” you asked quietly. He nodded, taken aback. He didn’t think you knew who he was.

“Yeah, and you’re Y/N? The new one?” he asked. You nodded.

“Yeah.” You sat in silence before you decided to speak again. “How did you manage to get into a class like this?” you asked. “You have the perfect quirk to be a-”

“Villain?” Shinsou spat. “You know what, I thought you were different. I guess not.”

You were confused. “No,” you stated. “I was going to say you had the quirk of a hero. You could do great things with a quirk like yours.” Shinsou gave you an amazed look.

“Seriously?”

“Seriously.” He flashed you a small smile and class started.

You slowly packed up your belongings in the locker room. You just finished your last class of the day, gym. You were exhausted, ready to grab a cup of coffee and head back to your dorm. You grabbed your backpack and walked out of the locker room.

“Hey wait up!” You turned around to see Shinsou running up to you. He slowed down to match your pace. “Hey,” he smiled. You grinned slightly.

“Hello Shinsou. What’s got you in a good mood? You usually don’t talk to others,” you pointed out. Shinsou shrugged.

“You’re not like the others. So, got any plans?” you shook your head.

“Not really. I was going to go get a coffee then head back to the dorm to study for our upcoming exam,” you answered

“Mind if I join you?” Shinsou asked. Your smile brightened.

“Sure!”

The two of you sat in your dorm room, studying. Shinsou asked if he could join you in studying and you agreed. Right now he was reading through a textbook while you were flipping through your notes.

“If you don’t mind me asking,” Shinsou started, catching your attention, “Can I see the drawing you were working on earlier?” You nodded shyly, leaning over to grab your sketchbook. You pulled out the loose piece of paper and handed it to the boy. He looked at it, amazed. “This is amazing!”

Your cheeks reddened as you hid behind your hair again. “Thanks,” you muttered. “It’s my quirk; I can draw what someone nearby is thinking,” you explained. Shinsou handed the paper back to you, accept his hand hovered near your head. He made eye contact with you before he brushed the hair from your face and behind your ear. He smiled before returning to his book. Silence fell between the two of you once again.

You and Shinsou became friends quickly. He’d walk with you back to the dorms after school and would even train with you from time to time. He understood that you were shy so he didn’t push you to do anything you didn’t want to. Month passed and it was time for break. You had invited Shinsou to come over one night to watch a movie, seeing as though you thought both your parents were working. He showed up in a pair of grey sweatpants and a purple hoodie. His hood was up when you answered the knock at the door. 

“H-Hey Shinsou,” you greeted quietly. He smiled.

“Hello Y/N, may I come in?” you nodded, letting him in and leading him to the couch. There were several warm, fluffy blankets and pillows strewn over the couch.

“What movie would you like to watch?” you asked the boy. “I have so many dvd’s, Netflix, Hulu, and Disney+ so I’m pretty sure I could find almost everything.” Shinsou shrugged as he plopped down on the couch, pulling a few blankets out from under him. You started pacing, fumbling with the remote and flipping through the apps on the TV. You also started to ramble and list off the movies you noticed.

“Y/N-” Shinsou started with a small chuckle. “Y--Y/N.” He gently took your hand and pulled you down to sit beside him. Your face reddened as you returned the small smile Shinsou was giving you. “You need to calm down,” he laughed. “I know you're anxious and I understand. Why don’t you go get something to drink and I’ll look for a movie, ok?” You nodded as he smiled. He gently took the remote from your hand and you went to get a glass of water.

Shinsou could hear a door open and close from the back of the house. “Y/N?” he called out quietly. There was the sound of glass shattering and shouts coming from the kitchen. The boy ran as fast as he could to where you were. “Y/N!” He slid into the kitchen to see a man towering over your trembling body. Blood dripped from cuts on your head and glass shards surrounded you. The man was yelling at you, or at least he was until he saw Shinsou standing in the doorway. The man sneered back down at you, raising an arm above his head. In the blink of an eye Shinsou was standing over you, forcing your father’s hand away from you. 

“What are you doing!?” Shinsou screamed angrily.

“Get out!” your father yelled. Shinsou activated his quirk.

“Leave,” he seethed. “Leave, and don’t come back.” The man turned and walked out of the door he had come through. Once Shinsou was sure the man was away from you, he turned around and dropped down by your side. You were hyperventilating and crying, freaked out. “Hey,” the boy said calmly. He attempted to reach out towards you but you flinched away from him. He frowned. “Ok,” he nodded. “I won’t touch you. Just try to calm down, ok?”

You continued to gasp, taking in much more air than you needed. “Look at me.” You looked up to see dark purple eyes filled with concern and kindness. He smiled softly when you listened. “There we go, that’s great. Now breathe with me, ok?” He took huge deep breaths, still looking into your eyes. After a few breaths you started to breath with him. You reached a hand out to him and he took it, squeezing it gently. You finally calmed down enough to speak.

“You should go,” you breathed, trying to stand. Shinsou pulled you back down so you were now sitting on his lap. He hugged you close to his chest before examining your head.

“I’m not leaving,” he stated. “And you’re bleeding. We need to get you looked at.” You started to panic again, shaking your head frantically.

You started to beg, “Please, no.” Tears streamed down your face and Shinsou wiped them away. “I can’t. They’ll take me away, please we can’t!” Shinsou rocked you back and forth.

“Ok,” he soothed. “Ok.”

Your teacher would never admit it but he cared deeply for his students. He would give his life 100x over if it meant his students would be alright in the end. He knew everything about his students; what they could do, what they couldn’t do, what they were afraid of, and what they were comfortable with. Aizawa was sure that his students could handle their own and would come to him if they ever needed them but there was one student he wasn’t too sure about. Y/N L/N. Aizawa knew that she had doubts about herself. He knew that she was always anxious and could get jumpy easily.

Today Aizawa was going to have his students present ways to help some of their classmates. Earlier in the week he had the class draw names and then they were to come up with ways to help the student they pulled out of a box with their quirk. It was your turn to present and you were starting to panic. 90% of the class had never even heard you speak.

“Y/N.” Aizawa spoke. “You’re up.” You took a deep breath before standing, walking up to the front of the class. You opened your mouth, attempting to speak, but no sound came from your mouth. You froze as your heart rate increased and your breath hitched. You shook your head, dropped your papers, and ran out of the classroom. Momo gasped.

“Do you-” she started but Aizawa cut her off.

“No.” The teacher followed his student out the door slowly. He roamed the halls as he looked for you.

You leaned against the wall, sitting on the cold tile floor. Tears brimmed your eyes as you took deep breaths to calm yourself. This wasn’t exactly the first time you’ve had to run out of class and later apologize to your teacher. You heard soft footsteps approach you and then someone sit down beside you.

“Are you alright?” you jumped slightly from the voice, still a little on edge. You looked to your side to see your teacher, Mr. Aizawa. You nodded, continuing to calm your breathing. Aizawa hesitantly wrapped an arm around your shoulders. The two of you sat in silence for a few minutes.

“I’m sorry,” the teacher whispered. “I should’ve known something like this would have happened.”

You shook your head. “It’s alright.” Aizawa’s eyes widened and he smiled. You were talking to him. “I need to outgrow this sometime, right?”

“It’ll take time, but I’m willing to help in any way that I can.”

Hawks knew that when he married you that there were many things that triggered sensory overload and anxiety. That’s why he let you stay in his office at the agency during most of the work day. You would help him with paperwork and you’d schedule events for him. That’s what you liked about your husband. He knew what triggered you and did his best to keep you safe.

When you had attacks out of nowhere, Keigo was always there to talk you down. If you were comfortable with him touching you, he’d hold you close to him and whisper in your ear. If you didn’t want physical contact he’d just sit with you and try to bring your attention away from what was triggering you.

Today was just one of those days. The days where you didn’t feel like yourself and just felt off. Your anxiety was through the roof and you didn’t feel like leaving your bed. Hawks had left before you were awake, having a conference to attend to. He should be getting back to the agency about now, you thought as you lay motionless on the bed. You were supposed to be at the agency right now but you couldn’t find the will to get out of bed. Your attention moved to your buzzing phone on the nightstand. Hawks. You let it ring as you continued to lay there. 

“Honey, I’m home!” Hawks called as he walked into the apartment you both shared. “Are you alright? You haven’t answered any of my calls and you weren’t at work.” He roamed the house, looking for you. He pushed open the door to the bedroom and saw your shaking form on the bed. He rushed over. “Baby, are you alright?” You didn’t answer as he pulled the blanket away from your face. He frowned. “Honey you’re having an attack. Can I touch you?” You nodded through your fear as Hawks swiftly picked you up and sat you in his lap. He shushed you quietly. “Breathe with me, ok?” Minutes passed as you struggled to come back down to earth and breathe. 

“It’s one of those days, isn’t it?” Hawks asked quietly. You nodded as your eyes drooped. These attacks always drained the energy right out of you. “Why don’t we take a nap?” You looked up and pecked Hawks’ lips before nuzzling further into his chest.

“That sounds nice.”

Having dealt with quite a few of these himself, Shoto understood that you wanted space when attacks hit you. These attacks came out of nowhere, most of the time when you were relaxing with your boyfriend. The two of you were cuddling on his bed, sitting in silence. You were curled up against Todoroki’s side, half asleep. The boy rested his cheek on your head as he read the book in his hands. Todoroki knew that you were having a particularly hard day. You were much more shy than you usually were and you clung to Todoroki for most of the day, not that he didn’t mind though. You usually only did that when your anxiety was worse than usual.

“Hard day?” he whispered to your half-conscious form. You hummed in response. “Anxiety?” You nodded. Todoroki pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your head. “Do you want to talk about it?” You opened your eyes, staring off in front of you. Your breath was still shaky, but it had been that way all day so you were used to it.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you muttered. “I just woke up and felt anxious.” Todoroki could hear the tremble in your voice and wrapped an arm around you.

“Why don’t I make you that tea that always helps you calm down?” he offered. “Then we can take a nap, maybe even watch a movie.” You nodded.

“Thank you.” Todoroki returned to his dorm room about ten minutes later with a cup of steaming tea. He set it down on the nightstand when he saw your sleeping form on his bed. He knew he should let you sleep but the tea he brought he knew would calm you down. He slowly lowered himself to lay down beside you, running his hand over your arm.

“Y/N,” he said softly and planted a kiss above your ear. “Wake up darling. I’m back.” You stirred and sat up. Todoroki handed you the cup of tea and pulled you to lean against him. The two of you stayed like that until you finished your tea. Once Todoroki placed the cup back on the shelf beside the bed, he laid the both of you down. “Better?” he asked and you nodded.

“Better.”

The boy always had a lot of energy due to his quirk. Denki was loud and always excited, which is why you two got along so easily. There were countless nights when you and Denki would stay up late playing video games together until breakfast the next morning. 

You were trying to set up one of the gaming systems as Denki walked into his dorm room, arms filled with snacks and drinks.

“Ready sweetpea?” Denki beamed. “How late are we gonna play today?”

You giggled at his sweet greeting. “I don’t know. My best guess is that we’ll lose track of time and end up falling asleep in class again.” Denki laughed. You sighed and moved to sit on your feet. “Can you help me Denki? I have no clue what I’m doing.” The boy nodded.

“Of course baby bolt,” he smiled. “Here, look.” He started to plug in certain cords and wires. He moved to pat your shoulder but sent sparks through your body. You twitched, wincing. Denki was taken aback before he launched forward and hugged you. “I’m so sorry!” he cried. “I didn’t mean to!” You laughed.

“It’s alright Denki, I’m alright.”

You played video games for about twenty minutes before you put your controller down and squeezed your eyes shut. “You alright chickadee?” Denki asked from his spot beside you. His voice wasn’t that loud, but it was like a bell ringing in your head.

“Please keep your voice down,” you whimpered. Denki scooted over to you, pulling you into a hug.

“Sensory overload,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry. I caused this when I shocked you earlier.” The boy continued to shield your eyes and stay quiet until you made it clear you were ok.

“Can we just go to sleep?” you asked quietly. Denki nodded.

“Of course baby bolt, if it’ll help at all.”

[i-like-sparkly-things]

Beautiful?

A Halstead!Sister

'But they don't know. They don't know what it's like to be you. They didn't know what it was like to wake up everyday, to a body you never asked for.

A body nobody wanted.'

Warnings : eating disorder, body insecurities, body dismorphia

Requested : Yup, by anon , 'could u do a fic where she has an eating disorder? and doesn’t tell jay but then one day she passes out at school and has to tell him?'

Word count : 1.7k

Note : this took too long I don't know why 😭but yall Guess who's thankful that yall bear with my English ? me. :) and ps this is my first request!! And yall please please know that all of you are so freaking beautiful and worth fighting for. Know that you are loved and it is never, ever weak to ask for help.

**************************

The constant pain and sleepless nights were paying off. Your eyes sparkled when you saw your new numbers. It was working.

You took your diary, crossing out breakfast on the to do list after eating a banana.

This was going to be simple. check what you eat, check your weight and repeat . You knew that if you tried really hard, you would be the one in control.

Control. That's all you wanted. Such an easy, yet painful thing.

You looked to the mirror, as your hands hovered over your ribs sticking to the skin . You'd never felt so beautiful in your life. But your eyes roamed down to your thighs. The flesh of your legs were touching. It wasn't enough.

It was never enough.

'' Y/n , come on ! Move your ass! I need to get to work!! '' Jay shouted for you, from downstairs.

'' Shut uppp I'm comingg'', you yelled back.

Ever since your mom had died, dad always kept to himself leading you to stay with your brothers. It had become a routine. Jay  would drop you off at school and Annie's mom would give you a ride home.

Lucky for you , Jay was constantly busy with cases. He hadn't noticed your new diet or the mood swings.

**************************

Your teacher had started the lesson. And slowly you sensed something wrong. Your head was pounding. God why is she so blurry? You look to Anne sitting next to you and she's Blurry too. You felt your body giving up to the swaying ground.

'' y/n!! '' Annie shreiked as your limp body crashed to the floor.

****************************

'' Chuckles!? '' Trudy called out,climbing the stairs to intelligence. "Do I look like a cocktail waitress to you? Where have you been??"

"Morning to you too, sarge" Jay sighed. "and its detective"

" Well , Detective , Y/n fainted at school and wanted you to pick her up"

"What ?" he asked shocked, aldready beginning to pick up his jacket.

"Sarge" he said, looking to Voight for approval, although he would leave nonetheless. "Go."

*****************************

"Mr. Halstead" the school nurse addressed him, as he entered the clinic.

"Call me jay. Y/n, are you okay? what the hell happened?" he asked you worried.

You had never fainted before and apart from the flu every couple of years, you had a clean bill of health, as far as he knew.

"Jay, I promise I'm fine. Just got a little dizzy, that's all" you answered knowing how overprotective he can get. Now all you could hope for was that he would let this slide.

"I tried getting some food in her but she told me she was fine" the nurse explained to Jay.

God No. the the salad she offered you had so many calories.  you had made too much progress nothing was going to stop you especially a simple fainting episode. It was a minor setback but you were sure you could continue your weight loss diet.

" What, WHY? " he questioned, but just  as you were thinking of a better reply " You know what, I'm gonna take her home." he interrupted your thoughts as he spoke to the nurse.

" Only if you are sure, you're good"

" I am Jay. One hundred percent." you replied, happy to skip the rest of the school day.

It's not like you've been paying attention any ways. You'd zone out a lot during class and  your constant hunger and cramps didn't help either. But you drowned these feelings away with small sips of water and occasional slices of cucumbers.

You Craved the Emptiness. the feeling of being lighter. The feeling of being....... perfect. It was intoxicating.

Taking your school bag, Jay wrapped a study arm around your shoulders , guiding you through the school corridors and towards his truck.

"God, I can't wait to go to bed", You said climbing the truck and fastening your seat belt.

"Yeah right. I'm taking you to med" he stated. "WHAT? Jay, what the hell ? I told you, I'm fine!!"

You knew Will was working and didn't want either of your brothers to know about your new diet or how much weight you had lost. It was too late to quit. The disgusting image in the mirror was slowly getting better..... getting thinner, prettier.

"You've never fainted before Y/n, and I promise I'll get Will to run the exams and do all the tests" he assured you.

****************************

"Y/n, I thought I told you I never wanted to see you here again.", Maggie greeted, pointing a finger at you.

"Awwww  but I missed you", you pouted, " No don't do that. your brother's waiting in treatment room 3 so you better get going." she instructed and you dropped your school bag near the nurses station.

You and Jay enter the room, to a very worried Will. "Y/n, what happened?" he asked , gesturing you to sit on the bed.

"did you hit your head when you fell? Did you fall in the bathroom or something like that?", he continued, not giving you time to answer.

"what did the nurses say? are you stressed about school?" " Will-", you interrupted his rambling " I'm fine, just..... got a little dizzy."

You watched , as he took his pen light to your eyes. "Ah! Will, stop!!" You said, trying and failing to refrain him.

"You know, it'll be easier if you stop squirming" Jay commented with a smug smile. "Your not going anywhere"

"Shut up" you groaned.

You need to get out of here. What if they gave you food. What if they found out you were hungry all the time. They'd never stop making fun of you. They'd tell you that you were overreacting and that all this was so unnecessary.

But they didn't know. They didn't know what it was like to be you. They didn't have floppy arms or fleshy thighs. They didn't know what it was like to wake up everyday, to a body you never asked for. A body nobody wanted.

******************************

"Jay" Will called out, seeing him outside your room. It had been a couple of hours since you were bought in.

Will had ordered some tests, being the ass he was.

Wonderful. You just hoped that all the tests would be normal and you could get the hell out of there.

"yeah man? just needed to text Hailey, Why, what's wrong?" Jay asked, studying the worried expression on his brother's face

"It's Y/n. "

***************************

You were fiddling with the hem of your t-shirt when your brother's walked in, staring at you, as if you were a ghost.

"Y/n," Jay croaked out his voice laced with dread, "how long?"

No. No. No. This can't be happening. God, you knew that they were going to hate you forever.

"what the are you talking about?" you needed to try to get them to back away."Is something wrong?"

They were standing on either side of your bed. Jay came closer and sat down on your right the beside your knees, eyes never leaving yours.

"Your tests-" Will started, "They came back showing you have severe deficiencies. That your body is struggling to survive. That it's not getting enough food." he broke away from your gaze.

"We um-" Jay, as if almost on queue, continued."We looked through your school bag and found your diary. "

You sucked in a sharp breath and shook your head. No. He knew. They knew.

All your calorie counts, the amount of calories you can have in a day, your research on diets, workouts, to do lists, hell, even your Period Tracker was written down. (although you barely had it anymore)

That book was the reason you were finally becoming happy with yourself. Your body.

'I'm sorry', you mouthed "I'm so, so sorry" This was it. Your voice hitched, as tears flowed down your cheeks. "I was finally happy"

In an instant, your brothers were by your side.

Jay engulfed you into his chest, your words circling his mind. 'Finally?' God, you lived together! You were his sister! His baby sister! How could he have let this happen to you? How could he not have noticed that you were drowning? That you were starving yourself. What kind of brother was he?

Will rubbed your back, until your sobs became quieter. He was a doctor. A damn doctor! God knows how long this has been going on, but at the end of the day.... he failed. He failed to be there,..... when you needed him.

"Y/n, you don't have to do this. You're beautiful Y/n. You really are. And I'm sorry that anyone else has convinced in otherwise" Jay breathed out, hoping you heard him, in his embrace.

"It felt good, Jay" your voice was muffled by his shirt, but to your brothers, your voice was loud and clear.

"Did it?" You turned to Will, "Did the hunger feel good?" his heart broke saying the words out loud.

'Yes', you wanted to answer. Of course it felt good. You were getting so many compliments from your friends at school. Boys started acknowledging you now.

It was like you finally existed. You felt...... worthy.

But with all the strength you could muster up, you couldn't get the words out. Because there was always one voice that told you to quit. The voice you'd been drowning out for so long. The voice that told you, that you were in fact, beautiful.

Your mother's.

"No" you said, realizing that Will had tears in his eyes as well.

But you couldn't find a hint of shame in them, no matter how much you searched. Instead, you were met with the immense worry and guilt of your brother.

"We can help, Y/n" Will said, as he took your hand in his, "We will help and we'll be there every step of the way."

"Every step" Jay assured and you turned to him. "All you need to do, is let us in"

You weren't prepared for this. You had no idea what to say.

You didn't want to feel tired all the time, always craving for food. But the idea of going back - back to all that shame - that's what scared you.

"Y/n," Will spoke up, seeing as you were struggling to answer, "I promise you, we are going to make you feel better...... and we'll fight those thoughts of yours together."

You took a shaky breath.

Thoughts.

Your thoughts.

You had let them consume you for a long time now. Too long. maybe..... Maybe the right voice to follow, was your mothers'. "okay-" you sobbed, "okay", and once again you found yourself in Jay's arms.

You, clinging to him like your life depended on it and him holding you tight, because it did. His hand rested on your head, tangled with your hair.

Will saw a tear make its way down his brothers cheek, something he hasn't witnessed often.

Your brothers sat silently, listening to you cry. Taking in the conversation, only having a glimpse of the pain you were in.

You had a long, long road ahead but as you sat in your brother arms, you felt a sense of peace, comfort maybe.

******************************

Masterlist

[barnesbabee]

[B]reeding Kink || C.S

[ꜱᴇxᴜᴀʟ ᴇɴᴄʏᴄʟᴏᴘᴇᴅɪᴀ - ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ʙ]

Summary: He broke into your house, and now he’s breaking you. (it's not fucking consentual non-con it's just inmate!San istg)

Pairing: Choi San x Reader

Words: my fairy godmother said it was 4311 words

Genre: Smut

⚠ mention of drugs, breeding kink, mentions of blood, mentions of violence, inmate!San ⚠

  You woke up with loud banging on your door. It was so sudden, you didn’t know what time it was, what was happening, or where you were. It took you a quick second to scan your surroundings. 

    It was 2am, or so said the clock on your bedside table, and you were sitting up in your bed, startled and confused about the booming sound echoing through your house.

    You got up from the bed and hurriedly wrapped your robe around your body, however, just as you were getting to the living room to look through the peephole, the door burst open. You covered your mouth with your hand to prevent any noise from coming out and hid behind the sofa, praying to whatever wanted to help you that he hadn’t seen you.

    You closed your eyes tightly and started breathing heavily as you heard the loud footsteps roam around your house. 

    It was hard to breathe and you felt as if someone was pressing on your chest. 

    You opened your eyes slowly and peeked behind the couch. You could see a man… His appearance wasn’t clear as the whole place was dark, the only thing illuminating the room being the moon. He had a broad back and dark hair, that you noticed, and he wore heavy, black boots, that left a trail of dirt wherever he walked. 

   Who was he? What did he want? Why was he in your apartment?

   You hid back and waited until you could no longer hear him.

    The silence of his steps felt unsettling… Your chest rose and fell rapidly, and it took all of the courage you had to peek around the couch once more. 

    However, this time you were met with a man’s face. He wore a wide, Cheshire Cat-like smile on his face as he stared right at you. You could almost feel his warm breath hit your face…

    “Hello, doll!” 

    You opened your mouth to scream but the male was faster. He slapped his hand over your face, preventing you from yelling for help or anything of the sort. 

    The male approached his lips to your ears.

   “I’m gonna need your help doll…”

   You took a look at his appearance. He had on a white, stained, and slightly ripped wife-beater, along with a flashy orange jumpsuit. You examined his body carefully. His hair was damp and his inked, very well-built arms were shiny, he had been running. You were inspecting everything as carefully as you possibly could.. when you noticed.

     Was that blood!? 

     There were little spots and splatters of dried, red liquid all over his clothes, which made you widen your eyes. What the fuck had he done!? 

     He noticed your sudden change of emotions and realized you had seen the state of his clothes.

     “Listen, I don’t wanna hurt you. I need you to hide me, I’ll explain everything but you’re not in danger, yet.”

     The ‘yet’ at the end of his sentence sparked something in you and you began struggling under his hold. He gripped your arm and forced you to stop shifting.

    “Calm. Down. You’re not in danger, but if you call the police on me, if you yell for help, you will be. All you have to do is be a good girl and cooperate, because if anything goes wrong, all you need to know is that there are eight of us, if I get caught it won’t be looking too pretty for you.”

    You looked at him, eyes still widened and breathing very heavily.

    “You got it?” He asked.

     He slowly removed his hand from your mouth and placed it on his thigh. You were full-on crying in fear at that point. 

    The male said nothing, he just sighed and ran his hand through his sweaty hair. He also didn’t know what to do. He had no idea where the other seven were, he had no idea if they were still alive and he honestly didn’t know what happened next.

    “Y-you should take a shower.” You told him, as you finally felt the reek coming from him. 

   He looked down at himself and nodded. The male stood up and looked at you.

   “I can’t trust you though.”

   “W-what then? You’re just going to stink forever? Are you going to make me sit in the bathroom while you wash?”

   You were just mocking him, but from the way he shrugged you could tell he didn’t mind one bit to have you in the bathroom with him. You refused at first, but you didn’t really have much choice as he dragged you around looking for the bathroom.

    You sat on the toilet, facing the wall as you crossed your arms in front of your chest.

    “I can’t believe you’re okay with this.” You complained. 

   “I was in prison, doll, I had hundreds of men looking at my ass every day when I showered, having a girl in a bathroom with me isn’t exactly a nightmare.”

    You were both silent. The sound of the water hitting the floor echoed in the room and the water was so hot that the atmosphere around you two became foggy. 

    “Fuck, this is heaven…”

    You would’ve chuckled if you weren’t so scared and uncomfortable.

    “You know, we have warm water in there, but there are so many people taking showers at the same time so it just ends up being cold all the time. The showerheads are also really old, so they get clogged all the time and there’s barely any water coming out… You come out looking mustier than when you went in.”

    You smiled at that. You could tell he was a people person, he was comfortable enough in this situation to tell life stories and maybe that was the purpose, but you started slowly feeling a little at ease. So much so that you gained the courage to ask the question you were scared of. 

    “What were you in there for?”

    You had to know. You couldn’t have a conversation with him, you couldn’t not feel uncomfortable and uneasy without at least knowing. 

    There was silence, and the water turned off.

    “Murder.”

    Your eyes widened from the nth time that night and you felt all blood be drained from your body. The sense of fear and anxiety washed over you once more, and you didn’t know how to react. Should you run? Should you stay? Should you speak, or should you be quiet? 

    A little childish giggle sounded in the bathroom almost forcing you to look behind. He pulled the shower curtain to the side, and although this man was naked from head to toe right in front of you, your eyes were glued to his face. The giggling was creepy, you hated it.

    “I’m joking, I went in for drug abuse and distribution.”

    You took a deep, shaky breath and closed your eyes, letting your head fall forward. You shed a couple of tears out of stress and relief. 

    “You… fucking idiot.” You cursed at him, still feeling a little lightheaded.

    He giggled once more and wrapped a towel around his waist, after roaming about the bathroom looking for one.

    “Why… Did you have blood all over you then?” 

    He pointed at his abdomen, where a deep cut that your eyes had completely missed stood.

   “It was mine. Mostly… Listen escaping prison isn’t that easy and there’s trap wire and people shooting, if you’re not bleeding it’s because you’re Michael Scofield, and sadly we’re all kind of stupid.”

  Although he moved like the wound didn’t hurt, you couldn’t help but worry about it. You pointed at the ripped flesh.

  “Can I… Can I fix it for you?”

  He cocked his head to the side as he looked at you, silently questioning himself as to why you would want to help him. He shrugged, nevertheless. He wasn’t about to decline help…

   “I’d like that.”

    He tied the towel tighter around his hips so it wouldn’t fall, and sat down on the toilet you were previously resting on. You reached for the cabinet over the sink and took the medical supplies from it.

   “This is going to hurt a bit so just, distract yourself by telling me about you.”

   The male scoffed at your words.

   “I’ve been to prison, I don’t think I’ll be hurt by- oh f-fuck!”

   You giggled at his little curse as you pressed the gauze with hydrogen peroxide against his wounded skin.

   He rested his head against the wall and flexed his abdomen.

   “O-okay so, my name is San I’ve been in there for 2 years and- fucking Hell go easy on me!”

  You giggled and mumbled a soft ‘sorry’ as you listened to his stories. You tried very hard to focus on your job, but your eyes would sometimes wander around his torso and covered thighs.

  “I uh, I started selling drugs when I was eighteen, I got thrown out of the orphanage and my little sister came with me, and I wanted to make good money so she could go to university.” he paused for a second, wincing as you switched products “It was fine for a while, I made some friends there which was nice. I never really had friends, cause I kept moving from the orphanage to foster houses back and forth, so I never stayed in one place long enough to make lasting friendships… B-but it didn’t go so well cause I got caught in a swoop and the eight of us went in.”

  When he finished the story you had no idea what to say… You felt a little bad about what he had just told you. 

   “I’m sorry…”

   “It’s fine, life isn’t always kind. Plus,” he stopped to grab your chin and bring your gaze up to his “I never said I was a good person, doll. I just said I was tryna get my sister to a better place.” 

   You stared into his eyes for a second, before snapping back to reality. You stood up and mumbled something along the lines of ‘I’ll get you some clothes’ as you walked off.

  Some of your larger garments fit him quite well. A pair of large, black joggers and a yellow hoodie that looked stupidly big on you. He had to go commando however, since you didn’t happen to have a pair of boxers lying around.  

   You set up the couch for him to sleep in as you weren’t about to give up your bed for an inmate that had just broken in, but he seemed pretty content in the comfort of your couch. 

    “You sure you don’t need some company in there, doll?” 

    You chuckled at his bold attempt and pressed your tongue against the inside of your cheek. 

    “Yes San, I’d rather keep the convict at least one hallway away.” You joked.

    Although you felt a little more comfortable around him, knowing that he wasn’t 100% a scumbag, you couldn’t let your guard down. 

    Your theory was proven when you woke up not much later after you fell asleep with a shadow looking straight at you from the doorway. Not remembering that you had a guest, you yelled. 

    He immediately came rushing to your side and shut you up with his hand.

   “Why did you scream!?” San asked, panicking.

   You removed his hand from your face harshly.

   “Because a huge shadow man was standing in my doorway like a lunatic! What are you doing!?” 

  “It’s… It’s 7am I’m hungry.”

 You shot daggers at him through your sleepy, hooded eyes.

  “Do you not sleep?”

   “Not really…  We have a lot of sleep deprivation in there.”

   Somehow he had this habit of making you do things by making you feel bad. And this was no exception. 

   You groaned and dragged yourself off of the bed, feeling kind of embarrassed about how terrible you looked compared to him. Although his hair was messy, it still made him look good, as it further defined his jawline.

  You didn’t know what he wanted to eat, so you just pointed at your cabinets and began teaching him what was inside of each of them.

   As you did all of this, you realized how often he’d brush his dark locks back, in order to get them out of his face. You looked at your wrist and surely enough there was a spare hair tie on it. You offered it to San, who gladly accepted the item and tied his hair in a small ponytail.

  You started walking back to your bedroom, to resume your interrupted sleep, but a pertinent question popped in your mind, and sleep was no longer your biggest preoccupation.

   You turned around and walked back to the kitchen, to find San shoving his hand down the cereal box and eating it dry.

    “San… What’s your plan here? I mean, in the long run. You can’t just crash in my sofa forever.”

    The male in question looked at you, a suggestive gaze playing in his eyes.

   “I can always crash on your bed.” He wiggled his eyebrows at you as he said this.

   “I’m serious, San. This can be really problematic for me! Do you realize the trouble this could put me in? If someone finds out you’re here I’ll have so many legal complications! I’m on the fourth floor, why did you even choose my apartment!?”

   San went quiet for a second and looked at the floor.

   “You’re the 69th apartment…” He replied quietly.

   You rolled your eyes and turned around, stressed out about his response, while rubbing your temples.

  Before you could get very far, however, the man grabbed your wrist and made you turn around.

   “You’re right, I’m sorry… We agreed to meet up in an abandoned building a couple blocks down from where we lived. We needed to lay low for at least a couple of hours. I got lucky I managed to lose the coppers, but I don’t know about them…”

    He had sat down by the dining table and buried his head in his hands. For some reason, 

you felt as if you should comfort him, so you approached the male softly and pet his head slowly.

    “I can try to help with the smaller things!”

    But little did you know that that statement would soon come back to bite you in the ass, when you came home later in the day, after your very tiring night shift, and found eight very big men sitting around your living room, just chatting it up as if it was their own house.

    Ignoring the possibly dangerous men sprawled on your floor and couch, you closed the door and walked towards San.

    “What… The fuck.” You said through gritted teeth, trying to remain calm.

    “Well, you said you could help with the smaller things, and that side of the town was flooding with cops looking for us, so I figured we could come here to lay low!” He said, gesturing to his friends.

    You closed your eyes and inhaled deeply. 

    “When I said small things I meant maybe food or warm water to shower with. I didn’t mean I’d be the shelter for eight hooligans!”

    “What did you just call us?” One of them calmly asked. 

   You looked behind San to face the bleached haired male, who had a mixture of angry and offended on his face. It suddenly hit you that all of these escapee inmates were in your house, staring at you as you insulted them, and nervous tears started brimming in your eyes.

    “I-I’m sorry Sir, but you are sitting on my rug and you came from jail I think I’m entitled to be upset right now.” You told him, holding up your index finger.

     “Listen I’m sorry but overstaying my welcome-”

     “Oh, you think you’re overstaying!?” 

    Already sick of your snappy attitude, San gripped your arm and pushed you back against the wall, causing you to wince and drop your keys. His face was millimeters away from yours, so close you could feel his breath on you.

    “Listen doll, I don’t think anybody wants eight wanted criminals in their living room but you don’t have a choice, okay!? Neither of us would be here if we had a better choice but we fucking don’t, so why don’t you make this easier for all of us and cooperate?”

    You had no choice but to nod, as you swallowed nervously. San let go of you and sighed, disappointed that he had to resource to violence.

   There was an awkward silence, that the male you had known the longest felt the obligation to fill. 

    “So, uhm, these are my friends… “ He said and began introducing them one by one.

    Some of the men remained expressionless, only giving you a nod as a greeting, while a couple smiled politely and the rest chimed a small ‘hello’. 

   “Did you… All go in for the same thing?”

   “Friendship goals, right?” The male you now knew to be named Mingi said, stealing a smile out of you. 

   There was the heavy silence again… And you searched deep in your head for what could solve the awkwardness.

    “Are you guys hungry? I don’t have enough food here but I could go out and buy some chicken. I don’t think it’s safe to have people deliver.”

    They all agreed and so you went on your way, to buy food for all the unwanted guests. It was probably a bad idea to go out on your own and carry all this chicken and alcohol (that you bought hoping that the eight men would become bubblier and less threatening after consuming it) but you still thought that was a better scenario than being caught in public with a wanted criminal. So after about forty-five minutes of struggling, you managed to get into the house with three huge bags: two for the chicken and one for the drinks. 

    Their eyes all lit up once you stepped foot inside of the house and suddenly they resembled little kids. The men instantly attacked the food, proceeding to hurriedly unwrap the chicken.

    “Damn Y/N, were you in jail too?” San asked when he saw you hungrily devour the food. It seemed like you too hadn’t eaten anything that good in years.

    You quickly flipped him off and continued eating. 

  Your speculations were correct, and as the empty alcohol bottles started piling up, the room started echoing with happy chatter and laughter. 

   All of the stress and panic about the situation started washing off from them as the hours passed by and you had to admit, hadn’t they been wanted criminals you wouldn’t have minded being a part of their odd friend group.

    “H-hey Y/N, you should sit here, it’s more comfortable.” San joked with a sly smirk, as he patted his lap.

     “Keep trying, lover boy.” You told him as you rolled your eyes.

     San then placed his hands around your waist and pulled you to sit on his lap, keeping a slight grip on your body, soft enough for you to leave if you were uncomfortable. 

    “Was this a good enough try, doll?” He whispered in your ear.

    You said nothing, and your silence made him chuckle as he pulled you back, until your back hit his chest. Somehow he was right. It did feel more comfortable… And maybe it was the alcohol, or the fact that San was actually insanely hot, but all of the tension left in your body evaporated, and you felt yourself melt into his touch. 

    All of the sounds started fading into the background and you didn’t even acknowledge the rest of the boys, as all you could feel was the way San was drawing shapes on your thighs with his long fingers, and how you wanted them a little farther up your body. You pressed your thighs against each other, and this action didn’t go unnoticed by San, who squeezed them tighter in his hold and groaned in your ear. 

    You could feel a hard-on beginning to form in San’s pants, as it began poking your ass. You shifted in his lap, causing his boner to harden by the second. He gripped his waist tighter and pressed you down on his growing problem. 

     “I really want you, doll, I think you want me too…” He whispered in your ear. 

     “You’re imagining things San.” 

      He rolled his hips up and held you in place, so you could feel every curve of his fully hardened member press against you. Of course he noticed the way you inhaled shakily and giggled. Giggled. 

     San was indeed an intriguing person…

     He kissed a couple of spots on your neck, and bit down on an area he found softer, managing to steal a small whimper out of you. 

     A couple of heads turned towards you and they smirked, acknowledging what was happening, but not wanting to bother or steal the moment away. They turned their attention back to the other men, leaving you two isolated once more. 

    “Please, let me fuck you, doll… I wanna feel how well you clench around me. Will you let me do that?”

    Your mind was clouded by pleasure and curiosity, and so you stood up and grabbed his wrist, pulling him towards your bedroom, not even bothering to give him a verbal response.

    The second the male heard the door click, he pushed you against it with his body and smashed his lips against yours. His hands were obsessed with your hips and thighs, constantly squeezing them as you grinded against his crotch. 

     He tapped the back of your legs and you wrapped them around him. San carried you to the bed as if you were made of feathers, and even though his tongue was harsh against yours, the way he let you down on the bed was soft.

      The two of you only pulled away when the confinement of your clothes started becoming unbearable. You peeled the work clothes (that you had never changed from) hastily from your body. San undressed just as quickly, and he couldn’t believe his view. After all that time being incarcerated he managed to have someone so good looking so willing to fuck him… He smirked and slapped your thighs, proceeding to grab them as he kissed your jaw, then your neck, then your chest, then your stomach, only stopping when his lips were dangerously close to a place you’d be wishing for him to touch you. He stopped and looked up at you. God, he wished he could take a picture of you right now… All jittery and messy, needy and aching for his touch. 

   "F-Fuck San, please!“ You begged, finally, when the teasing became too much. 

   "Anythin’ for you, doll." 

  He teased your entrance with his tongue before entering two fingers, as to prepare you for what was to come. San squeezed and bit your thighs as his fingers entered you in a high speed. 

    "Oh my G-God, San- I want you in me." 

    He groaned at your neediness, and shoved the fingers that had previously been in you past your lips. 

    You maintained eye contact as you sucked slowly on his digits.

    San lined up his cock with your entrance and pushed into you slowly, causing you to wince slightly and bite his fingers. 

    The male immediately removed his hand and moved both his hands to rest on your waist. 

    "Y-you okay, doll?” He asked, afraid he’d hurt you. 

    "Yes- yes, move…" 

     San bottomed out inside you with a loud groan. He didn’t move for a second, trying to take in how tight you were and how good he felt. And even though he tried to hold back by starting to thrust into you slowly, he soon lost control. His hips snapped against yours uncontrollably fast and neither of you cared if the moans and whimpers could be heard in the next room. 

    "S-shit, look at you doll, taking my cock like a good girl-“ 

     You gripped his arms, digging your nails into his skin, loving the way he talked to you. 

    Something about seeing all of those artworks in san’s body made you feel more attracted to the male. 

   "You feel so good inside me Sannie.”

    The pet name and the little praise caused his cock to twitch inside of you, and you could tell he was almost there, by the sloppiness of his thrusts. 

    You wanted to see what he looked like in pure lust, you wanted to do the dirtiest things with this man, his sinful figure bigging out someone you didn’t even know you had in you. 

     "I-I need to cum doll, where do you want me to-“ 

    "Inside me! Please, please cum inside me San!” You begged as you clung onto him for dear life. 

    His cock twitched once more, and he looked at you with a mix of surprise and lust in his eyes. 

    "Y/N are you sure cause-“ 

    "Fucking breed me, San! I want your cum dripping out of me, please!" 

   The intensity of his thrusts increased as did the grip he had on you. 

    "You want me to breed you? Hm? Make you mine forever? Turn you into a bad girl for me? Y-you’re so dirty…”

   "Y-yes! God yes!“ 

    "Oh f-fuck!” Was the last thing he managed to yell as he buried his member deep inside of you, shooting white spurts of cum that covered your walls. 

    It was the way his body trembled and the way his mouth fell open with small whimpers that caused you to climax right after him. 

   His sweaty body collapsed on top of yours as he slowly pulled out, and you could feel the cum drip out of your hole. 

   For a couple of seconds all that could be heard was the heavy panting, until San lifted his head and looked at you. 

    "Fuck, I guess you belong to me now…“