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taradactyls · 2 months ago

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It's thinking about Darcy desperately yearning running into Elizabeth at Pemberley hours.

Like, you fell in love with this woman, but rationally (pridefully) you though it wasn't something you should pursue. But you can't forget her, and then she's at Rosings... and the more you see her - with her wit, her eyes, the liveliness of her mind - the more she undoes every expectation of who you should marry that you'd ever had. You prolong your trip to see more of her, you start imagining what it will be like married to her and unwisely after only seeing her again for a week begin asking how she'd feel living far away from Longbourn, and even hint things like she'd be staying at Rosings next time she visits Kent.

It's too much. You're feeling too much.

She's due to visit for tea the night before you take leave, and an evening gives far more opportunity for privacy and conversation than sitting in Mrs Collins' drawing room for half an hour the next day.

But she doesn't come, she's feeling ill, and you won't see her. If you don't make an effort, you might never see her again. It's not like Bingley will be going back to Netherfield anytime soon, after all.

You bail on the evening and go check if she's ok.

It's late, but you have to see her.

She's not super friendly when answering your questions about whether she's feeling better, yet that's to be expected when someone has a headache. But she's there, sitting with you quietly, and then you're so agitated that you begin pacing.

It's inescapable. You love her too much.

You'll marry her, and deal with all the impropriety of her family's connections and behaviour. She's worth it.

Because of course she'll say yes. You've been so open that she must be expecting your addresses. It doesn't occur to you that you're wrong to assume she's wishing for it.

Then she rejects you.

And she doesn't only reject you: she shatters your entire perception of self. Not immediately - oh, she creates a large crack, but it takes some time for you to do justice to her words. But they linger, inescapably.

"Had you behaved in a more gentlemanlike manner."

You're bitter, and angry, and hurt, and offended, and the sense of doubt isn't going away. But there is one thing you can do, that you have to do.

You write her a letter to explain yourself against the accusations she levied your way - some unjust, but others will eventually gnaw at you until you're forced to face them and stare directly at all the faults you didn't know you had.

You know it won't make her accept you.

The turn of her countenance you'll never forget, as she said that you could not have addressed her in any possible way that would induce her to accept you.

But you need to write the letter: to explain, to warn, and maybe - just maybe - make her think a little better of you.

If she even gives credit to anything you say.

She thinks so little of you she might dismiss your arguments and only hate you more for what you said of her family.

God, you basically insulted her family again in the letter. With an apology, yes, and as an explanation, but you knew at the time that those comments and what you divulged of Wickham would give her pain. But it's necessary. You still believe that, even as time goes on and you begin to wonder if all it achieved was making her hate you more.

The last time you saw her was as you handed her that letter.

She hadn't spoken.

You weren't yet master of your emotions enough to see her and be friendly, the best you could do was try be composed.

If only you'd been truly as calm and composed as you thought you were when you wrote that letter. You can see now that you wrote in a dreadful bitterness of spirit. There were some expressions you used, the opening of it, which alone would be enough to justify her hate. Though, despite your emotions, you never doubted for a moment in her goodness - never doubted that she won't spread around what you divulged of your sister.

She hates you, but all the reasons you love her are still there.

That's something that doesn't change as you slowly unravel the flaws her reproofs revealed to you and you try to become the person you always thought you were. So many behaviours, and the emotions that governed them, were not what they ought to be. Your principles were always good but you followed them in pride and conceit.

You were blind until she cut you to the quick. Opened your eyes to yourself and taught you such a hard lesson - but it was for the best. She properly humbled you and taught you how insufficient all your pretensions were to please a woman worthy of being pleased. Even if you never see her again you will be worthy of the title gentleman.

You will work to become the person you want to be.

Her rejection doesn't hurt so much as the knowledge that she was right and you failed yourself and so many others. Any anger or blame you felt for her words when refusing your hand are long since passed. If she had been able to overlook those flaws she wouldn't have been the woman you love.

The more you reflect and seek to rectify your behaviour the clearer it all becomes. In trying to understand yourself you realise that so many of these flaws have existed almost your whole life. And yet, despite how obvious it now seems, you had no idea.

Though your parents were good themselves they spoilt you - first as an only child, then as an only son - and you grew selfish and overbearing, caring only for your small family circle. Thinking meanly of the rest of the world, wanting to think meanly of their sense and worth compared to your own.

You owe the world so much better.

Your position, far from giving you leave to treat others as inconsequential, means you have a duty to think of others and ensure they are not wronged. Yes, you've done that broadly - especially on your estate, and always with servants and the poor - but what of in smaller ways, to those closer to your own rank? Have you directly treated them with civility and respect?

You know the answer now, but you're doing your best to fix it.

For almost four months, you ruminate on her words and turn yourself into a gentleman you can respect. Someone worthy of the respect you've so rarely had to actually earn. Someone who might've been worthy of her respect from the beginning.

You've never stopped loving her.

Almost four months, and you're not sure if you'll ever see her again.

You certainly weren't expecting to leave the stables after arriving at Pemberley and find her standing in front of your house.

Your eyes meet.

You freeze in place.

Four months of distance and then twenty yards away from each other.

She's blushing (so are you).

Your brain is too surprised to work.

She's here.

She's here and you're just standing there.

You have to go to her. Even if you didn't still love her, it's the polite and friendly thing to. (But you do still love her, and so her presence is a physical weight in your chest that you could scarce resist).

She had turned away briefly, but turns back when you approach.

You hardly know what you say, she hardly raises her eyes to meet yours, but you hear her voice, and she doesn't sound annoyed when she answers that her family is well.

Honestly, despite how discomposed you are by seeing her without time to prepare, your instinct is to stay by her. Even if it means speaking like a fool. You're pretty sure you ask her when she started travelling and how long she's been in Derbyshire at least thrice. But you start to recollect yourself, breathing a little more evenly, and run out of things to say. Remembering that she's here with friends and you've just come from the road, you take your leave.

Your thoughts stay with her though.

She was still just as lovely as ever. More civil to you than you have any claim to.

Your housekeeper says a gentleman and two ladies were taking a tour of the house, and have now gone with the gardener to see the accustomed part of the park. You know the place.

As your valet helps you change your thoughts solidify: you can meet them, and, through every civility in your power, show her that you aren't resentful of the past.

She's so close, and you can't lose this chance to perhaps obtain her forgiveness, lessen her ill opinion, by showing that her reproofs have been attended to.

And, maybe, you're just desperate for any excuse to see her.

By now, you've been in love with her for more than eight months, despite trying, really trying, to forget her both when you left Hertfordshire and Kent. It's pointless, either you'll recover in time or you'll spend the rest of your life in love with her. At this point you don't even want to fight it. Despite the pain of her not feeling the same way, she did you the greatest good anyone could, by showing you who you really were. You improved yourself because you should, without any expectation of seeing her again, but one thing that you can't alter about yourself is your love for her.

Right now, what matters is being near her and showing her you can be a real gentleman.

So, you follow her and her companions to the stream.

She speaks first this time. Putting herself forward to be friendly and polite. Proof, surely, that she doesn't hate you so much anymore? She's almost her usual smiling self, though she goes red and silent while admiring Pemberley's beauty.

You can understand why - you had determined to not ask whether she liked your home in case it sounded like you were wondering whether she regretted rejecting you and thus Pemberley. You know she didn't mean anything by her praise (and she'd known you were rich when she turned you down) but you understand her sudden embarrassment.

Although... when did she start caring that you might misunderstand her and think badly of her? She didn't care the last time you met.

But that's not important now. It's for you to ease the conversation and prove yourself. So you change the subject, and ask her to do the honour of introducing you to her friends.

Her surprise is obvious, and fair. Seeking the acquaintance of strangers, even respectable-looking ones, just wasn't something you used to do regardless of what the well-bred and civil action was.

And what does it say about you - with all your newfound respect and civility - that you're still surprised when the fashionable couple she's with turn out to be the very aunt and uncle you'd previously declared would be a disgraceful connection. You recognised you were wrong to be so dismissive, so rude, but the core assumption that the tradesman brother of Mrs Bennet and his wife must be noticeably vulgar had clearly remained. Yet here they were, everything elegant and well-bred.

How right Elizabeth had been about you.

But now you can show her that was the past, and your manners are improved and prejudices lessened.

You walk back with them, talking to the uncle, who has intelligence, taste, and sense. You like him a surprising amount. He points out trout in the water, and you're glad to invite him to fish here while they stay in the area. You have all the supplies he might need, and know the best spots. As you speak with him your attention is only half distracted by who walks behind you at a short distance.

Hopefully her uncle's happiness makes her happy also.

You have the chance to see, when the walking arrangements change and then she's the one walking beside you.

Honestly, you're not immediately sure what to say, but again, she speaks first.

Yes, she almost certainly doesn't hate you anymore.

Her explanation that she'd been assured of your absence before visiting sounds more like she doesn't want you to think her rude, than expressing disappointment that you are here.

Yes, whatever her past insults, she definitely cares that you don't think badly of her...

As though you ever could.

In mentioning why you returned a day early you mention who you're with, and too late saying Bingley's name reminds you that the last time you two spoke of him was when she (rightfully) blamed you for separating Bingley and her sister.

That silences you for a moment - but she doesn't respond with anger.

Composing yourself, you ask if your sister might be introduced to her. You've spoken of Elizabeth so highly to Georgiana, and so often, that your sister would love to meet her. You don't need to ask - your sister is the social superior, her wishing for the acquaintance is strictly enough for the introduction to be made - but you want to. You mean it, when you ask Elizabeth whether you're asking too much by facilitating the introduction. You want her to have the chance to say no.

But she says yes.

(Even sounding pleased about it, though surprised.)

Which is also a yes to seeing you again during her stay at Lambton. Renewing your acquaintance, despite everything.

The happiness, however irrational, this creates cannot be quelled.

You love her too dearly to not appreciate every fragile overture and sign that she must no longer think you so bad. The letter - your own improved civility - one or both has done away with her dislike.

Replaced it with... well, anything other than dislike is a place to begin.

This time the silence stretches as you walk; she, perhaps, just as lost in thought as yourself.

You could get used to walking around Pemberley with her.

A dangerous thought.

You scarce know what to say as you wait by the carriage for her aunt and uncle to catch up, after she declared herself not tired when you asked if she wanted to come into the house. But, again, she makes the effort to talk to you. You've never spoken of Matlock or Dovedale so persistently, but you want to keep talking to her - hearing her voice - receiving her smiles - for every moment that you can steal.

Four months apart and then the first day seeing her again your heart loves her more than ever before.

And she no longer hates you.

You would have them all come inside, take refreshment, stay, please stay a little longer, but they felt it was time to return to the inn. They're leaving, but you've already organised to bring your sister to see her the day after tomorrow, so it's only a short parting.

Not another four months.

You hand her aunt up into the carriage - and then Elizabeth.

Who is dearest and loveliest to you still, though you might never be able to say those words to her.

You're so aware of feeling her hand in yours, though gloved; the weight and warmth of it. The brief tightening of her fingers on yours as she takes the step up, leaving you bereft when she lets go.

You don't watch them drive away, though you feel her absence palpably as you slowly walk back to the house.

But it's only two days - two days before you'll see her again.

And they're staying for a little while.

All of it is more chances to show her the person you are now. Both the good qualities you never properly revealed before, and the newer ones deliberately acquired to remedy the errors she revealed. Show her you're a man she might admire.

Perhaps a man she might one day be able to love.

It's almost embarrassing, to admit how quickly that wish introduced itself after seeing Elizabeth again.

It probably took under half an hour after you saw her again.

#you ever get consumed with the *yearning* and just need to ramble about it? Because I do.#exploring yearning is a passion of mine as anyone who's read my fanfic will know lol #and ah I've done it again I've written a lot when I wanted to write something brief #my curse #it's the amount of pining from the unrequited love we can read into Darcy's pov that's to blame #p.s. So many of Darcy's lines of his self reflections (we get so little!) live rent free in my head can you tell #(also remembered after posting this that he didn't plan with Liz to bring Georgiana in two days she assumed with Mrs Gardiner whoops)#pride and prejudice #jane austen #elizabeth bennet #fitzwilliam darcy #mr darcy #elizabeth x darcy #darcy x elizabeth #fanfiction #austen opinions #mine

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lightgamble · 2 months ago

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DAREDEVIL: BORN AGAIN | 1.09

You couldn't call me?

#Daredevil Born Again #Karedevil #Karen Page #Matt Murdock #ddba spoilers #Daredeviledit #Daredevil Spoilers #Not Revolution #GIF set #Mine #Shippers gonna ship #I find it really hard to express why I like this so much and yet STILL want Kastle #It's something about how Matt relaxes around her #He's so guarded 99% of the time. And he pushed her away HARD many MANY times over the years for whatever BS reason he could think of #and they've finally gotten to a place (and it's a year later than would have been better for everyone) where this is permanent.#This is safe. This is home. They're stuck with each other.#And I love the contrast between Matt anxiously trying to convince Kristen and his gf that there's a threat and he has to go DO STUFF and #how different the reaction is when he says the same things (albeit with more detail) to Frank and Karen. It's night and day.#He's only a real person with people who know his secret identity.#There's something delicious about a phone call being where Matt's stuck. As if he doesn't have a history of dodging her calls. And I get #that he would have welcomed calls now - or in the last year - but there are so many scenes were poor karen is just getting shutdown by Matt #and Foggy. Calls unanswered or ended quickly. Because they have other stuff going on and lying to her is hard so it's easier not to pick up #And then you have Frank who is like... a fugitive? A hermit basically. Someone off the grid. Living in a basement. Who has an active cell #plan and has made sure Karen has his number in case she needs it. And he clearly answers when she rings. And there's no one else ringing.#So it's basically a phone - maybe specifically so Karen can reach out.#AND I LOVE THE FRAMING OF THIS SHOT. I love how close Matt and Karen are sitting. I love that Frank is pretending to ignore them.#Coz there's no way he's okay with how close they are. But he's not going to make it weird because he's a good friend to Karen.#Maybe I should blame Karen for me shipping every ship that involves Karen.

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achingly-shy · 1 month ago

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kat's five-star agents of shield episodes (1/?) + @goosecoven’s may art event: get to know you night 🪿

"pasty? oh, really? well, when did you become so sun-kissed? because i'm pretty sure that every minute of every day, you've been stuck in a lab right beside me. at the academy, at sci-ops, this plane — you've been beside me the whole damn time!"

#agents of shield #marvel #tw: flashing gif #kat.gif #aosfaves*#aosedit #marveledit #marvelgifs #coven's may art night #useralethea #userlace #userkarolina #how is this get to know me? well this episode is my life so <3 #and hi so! who knows if i'll finish this series but there are 15 other episodes just from seasons 1-3 alone that i've rated five stars on m #latest rewatch.....so who knows this could keep me fueled for ages #idk if i'll stick to the exact same format or if i'll just make a gifset per episode in some way shape or form #but i figured this would be a fun way to share my favorite episodes and get back into giffing!#sorry for the lack of daisy in these gifs i realized afterward that i didn't get any shots of her (blame my fitzsimmons mind especially #during this episode - foundational blocks are being laid <3)#also if that screenshot of my serializd review looks blurry....no it doesn't lmao #i gave up fighting photoshop #oh also sorry again for giving ward a feature hate his guts but it’s to complete the trifecta of making fun of him #oh oh and last thing #yeah i'm plugging my serialzd please i need friends there i'm so funny sometimes i promise #yapping over gifmaking comeback in full swing here i come

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bandzboy · 10 months ago

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saying shit like “it’s on you women for stanning boy groups” is not helping and you are putting blame on women who had NO IDEA that this man was awful how are they supposed to know??

#like sure we are careful #but i say it for myself i am not gonna go around #and think everyone is a criminal??#like that doesn’t even make sense #there was no way of knowing any of this #his public persona did not let us know he was a piece of shit #SO HOW WERE SUPPOSED TO KNOW??#blaming his fans who were women for something they have no control over #is just honestly vile i need you people to stfu rn #tris.txt

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mishiami · 4 months ago

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good morning tetro community

@jubileedeeznuts-posting dragged me into this because he's a dastardly awful terrible unforgivable wretch and i HATE her

#my art #tetro danganronpa pink #hiroaki nakamigawa #ojima takeshi #hama ran #that's right ... it's me .... jubilee “mate” who was dragged in for the third trial .....#im just gonna yap in the ensuing tags don't mind that #hama's such a cutie i actually love him so bad thats all abt that #“that's all” no it's not i just wanted to draw him smiling bc he deserves it #what a sweetie bro has done nothing wrong ever #and hiroaki and takeshi .... wait shoudl i tag #hirojima #anyways aside from shipping i just think their dynamic is really really good #hiroaki is so clearly bothered by takeshi zoning out but vehemently doesn't blame HIM for it #and defends him against other people getting mad at him for it AND their accusations because he TRUSTS takeshi more than anyone #that trust and that bond means so much in a setting like this #andit must mean so much to takeshi who feels so unsafe in his life. in this place. in his own head. but he has SOMEONE he can feel safe wit #the way he calls for nakamigawa when he's in such a vulnerable state and sounds so close to tears #that bond is something so special. i'm not even talking about shipping it's just so SPECIAL. this is so MEANINGFUL #having someone to rely on even if you're not ready to tell them your deepest traumas #but still knowing that they'd be there for you when you need or want them #not being in your right mind but calling out for someone and they're THERE and they keep reassuring you of that fact #holy mother of god #i really like takeshi and hiroaki but especially takeshi he's my number 1 #tetro danganronpa

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tagarilaghost · 7 months ago

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I SWEAR CELEBI'S THINGY IS COMING SOON BUT I REALLY WANTED TO POST THIS ALRIGHT

yeaah... future trio got me too...

and Darkrai is there too, because of course he is.

hey look i drew a cute Drifloon :D

...ignore the rest

whatever started at Darkrai doodles ended in brainrot of future trio + darkrai and I'm blaming @scribz-ag24 for this

#Can you believe between the first pic and the 4th pic is only a week inbetween. I sure can't but like why did I mirror the pose...#ON ACCIDENT??? Everytime I look at the two Grovyles I'm like... how... how did they end up so differently???#also probably blaming @cozybells as well for this but I really fear tagging people so I'm just letting y'all know in the tags because #I do wanna let everyone know who inspired me when someone did <333 better get running [you know who you are!!!!] DusnoirXDarkrai is next...#also: upon seeing scribz-ag24's art my brain said: You need to color too! ah yeah that went well with the doodle batch #I really hope you're able to read everything with how messy I can write sometimes. If not please let me know and I'll add sth in this post!#Also the doodle batch was the first thing I drew so well... never drew dusknoir before and grovyle once i think...#please go easy on me I have yet to explore the relationship between literally everyone😭 and I have no idea what I‘m doing and I'm a little #lost I normally only draw King Boo or Darkrai but I'm sure scribz-ag24 sprinkling in bits of Darkrai got me in love with the future trio to #grovyle #future trio #celebi #darkrai #dusknoir #pmd hero #pokemon #drifloon #totodile #my art #my stuff #tagas friend spoiler #pmd #pokemon mystery dungeon #IS THERE A SHIP NAME FOR FUTURE TRIO... there must be. ...oh... is it just...#futuretrioshipping #i feel sooo stupid rn.#also everytime i drew darkrai i had evil spiteful bastard in mind (except for the one with an arrow pointing out he's redeemed) but i think #i literally mixed every possible version of him in my head so got absolutely no clue what i'm doing :D #anyways i hope you enjoyed this and thanks for reading through my ramblings! Have such a wonderful rest of the day yippiee <333 #pmd2

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dayurno · 1 year ago

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robin cross and kevin day parallels actually go so crazy. they both spent their formative years in a basement underground with exy-obsessed captors. they both saw exy as freedom. they both were isolated even within the foxes’ group of outcasts. they were both under andrew’s protection. it cost kevin jean to leave the nest and it cost robin another girl’s life to escape her kidnapper. robin carried her racquet with her to self-soothe and kevin restrings the net of his when he’s anxious. they’re even bird coded

#to those unfamiliar the word robin is also a kind of little bird 🕊️#i dont ship them but i dont blame the people who do if im honest #BUT ITS JUST CRAZY TO MEEE #its so fucked that canonically kevin never gets to meet her #but i will say that the echoes of his presence are still there #she joins the foxes the year after kevins graduation and there andrew is taking robin to night practice #there he is coaching her because he knows exy is the tool she needs to believe in herself #there he is doing what kevin day told him only years late 🫠#sorry they make me insane #robin when she’s the weird kandreil amalgamation no one asked for #will expand on this if i have more thoughts later but please talk to me about robin. thank you #txt #aftg #kevin day #robin cross #kevin #robin #fav #kevin&robin

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starry-bi-sky · 10 months ago

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Thinking about the CFAU and marveling at how much Danny and Jason care for one another. Does anybody else figure out that Danny is going to kill the Joker, or is that knowledge Jason exclusive? I can't see Danny being close enough to any other Batfam member to disclose his plans, but I wonder if he drops hints. They're a family of paranoid detectives. I'd be surprised if they don't figure out Danny has a PURPOSE for being in Gotham at some point. Whether Danny's able to disguise it as wanting to be closer to Jason or not is another burning question.

Its def Red Hood exclusive! You're right in that Danny isn't close enough to disclose his revenge plot to any of the batfam members -- hell, not even Sam and Tucker know his true motives for returning to Gotham, and they're his best friends right after Jason! And Red Hood knows only because Danny accidentally slipped up ;].

I do also think that the Waynes kinda think something might be up with Danny -- at least Dick and/or Bruce might since they're the only ones who actually know him beyond brief mentions of him. Tim knows about him due to his stalking, but doesn't really know him -- and Danny plans to keep a healthy, friendly distance from the family so he can carry out his plans.

It's not that he holds any dislike towards them -- quite the opposite. He appreciates what they do for Gotham and recognizes the hard work that goes into keeping their Rogues Gallery at bay (even if he is bitter about Joker, but there's an obvious reason for that) -- but, well. He knows they're the vigilantes, he doesn't want to risk them sniffing out his murder plot before he can even go through with it.

Luckily for him he can excuse any distance he puts between them as just being busy with life and trying to settle in, and they're not close enough to him anymore to find it suspicious. I do think they figure out he's back in Gotham for a reason, Danny's not going to exactly hide the fact that he's back to find some kind of closure -- but what that closure is?

I think the only person who might suspect something sinister going on would be Bruce, who saw the sinking rage in Danny's eyes at the funeral -- it was part of the reason he didn't tell him who killed Jason (beyond secret identity reasons). But that depends on whether or not Danny reveals some of his hand, and the fact that he was still holding onto that rage (somewhat unwillingly) all this time.

#dpxdc #danny fenton is not the ghost king #dp x dc #cfau #childhood friends au #cfau danny #dpxdc crossover #danny's kept this deep-seeded hatred close to his chest for years. he's so close to his goal he's more careful than ever. he's under the #watchful eyes of his home city and the even more watchful eyes of her knights. he can't make any mistakes here -- not after the last one #with red hood. every step he takes going forward must be a cautious one so he doesn't draw the light of the batsignal.#also! funnily enough danny doesn't blame bruce for jason's death. sure they had a fight but he's not the one who sold him out to the joker #he's not the one who beat him to death. who blew him up. he's bitter over the fact that bruce withheld the identity of his murderer from hi #but even he can recognize the need to protect one's secret identity so he doesn't hold it against him that much. he's bitter over the lack #of action against the joker but that's a personal vendetta and again he recognizes how hard it is to be a hero. he would never ask bruce to #kill the Joker. he recognizes the fact that a hero cannot play judge jury or executioner and he respects Bruce's adherence to his moral cod #he knows it must be hard and he agrees that batman shouldn't kill. ever. bc if the batman kills the joker what's stopping him from killing #the common criminal? its a level of self-restraint and self-awareness that all heroes must have. and he genuinely respects bruce for it #if someone wants the joker dead that bad they can go and do the deed themself -- that's what HE'S doing. danny recognizes that his revenge #is wholly selfish in nature. it is closure for him and jason and him and jason only. its not good its not righteous its murder and danny #has come to terms with it.

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sassypantsjaxon · 7 months ago

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Underrated zosan: Zoro being annoyed with Viola for taking Sanji

#can you blame him?#one second his other half's got his back and the next second he's been kidnapped #zosan #also i love that Zoro calls him 'our cook' instead of just 'the cook'#needs to make sure Viola knows who she stole #also i can't take them too seriously when they're dressed like like

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wren-kitchens · 4 months ago

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i can’t find the words

1492 words

the infirmary is silent, save for the raspy breathing of its only inhabitant. it took a long while for him to ignore the pain enough to drift off, but I doubt his dreams are being particularly kind to him; getting tortured does that to a guy. apollo left after he was certain he had done all he could, and is currently resting. if you think harming a god like that takes a lot of power, healing a god tends to take twice that much —you can’t pour from an empty oinochoe, as they say, and if poseidon's sorry state is anything to go by, he'll be needed again pretty soon.

okay this one is pretty much entirely based on @neal-illustrator's famtheon hkfdj this is also partly inspired by luke Sobbing in the live-streamed watchthrough of the ithica saga songs

have some zeus & poseidon hurt/comfort 👍 a part 2 to this!

cw: mentions of torture and injury!

of course, all of olympus has heard the news—courtesy of hermes, to no one's surprise—and yet even the trickster god himself has not set foot in the healing chambers. if you ask me (and really, who else is there to ask?), they’re all rather frightened. not of poseidon himself, or the injuries, but of what the two combined represent: if the god of the ocean, all-powerful and second strongest deity in all the land, can be taken down by a mere mortal.. what does that say for the rest of them?

no one other than I actually dare to voice this sentiment, but it hangs heavy in the air near the silent infirmary. the area is usually less bustling, due to its solemn nature, but athena's brief visit after her.. little spat with zeus brought flocks of siblings and uncles and cousins to simper and sympathise and bring flowers of every kind. after all, a god wounding another is hardly an uncommon sight—and not even remotely cause for concern. now, poseidon's chamber remains empty of any signs of life other than the god himself in the bed, and smears of golden ichor on the bedsheets from what his bandages could not contain. a grim sight indeed.

although- I tell a lie. for the first time since poseidon arrived, someone other than apollo enters the chamber—uncharacteristically hesitant, almost walking back out as they feel the crushing silence in the place. the god carries an almost amusingly small flower when compared to their size, but the expression on their face erases any hilarity the situation may have created. after all, it's one thing to hear the god of the ocean was struck down by a mortal—it's another matter entirely to see your elder brother near-lifeless after being tortured with his own weapon.

the fact that his brother remains asleep is both a source of anxiety and relief for zeus. it's not news to anyone that the king of gods does not like to show weakness, let alone affection, and poseidon's lack of consciousness combined with the rest of the pantheon's aversion to the infirmary allows for him to act unobserved (of course, they are not entirely unobserved, but they are unaware of my existence, dear reader). on the other hand.. the empty look on the sleeping ocean god's face, accompanied by the ichor-stained bandages across his torso and eye brings a mortifying dread to zeus' heart that he would vehemently deny ever experiencing, even to himself.

poseidon stirs, muttering something inaudible, and zeus practically freezes in place. he makes to turn over, and immediately groans in pain, startling awake. it takes a second for him to regain his bearings, but when he does, he practically stares at zeus, visibly surprised. momentarily, the brothers gape at one another, both feeling somewhat caught out, before finally, zeus speaks.

"I- brother!" he says, making an attempt at his usual bravado and falling ever so slightly short. "I see you are- making a speedy recovery?"

blinking back sleep and lasting confusion, poseidon clears his throat- and suppresses a wince as his wounds protest. "yes, I- apollo has been doing.. good work."

"I can see." zeus tries for a confident smile. it doesn't quite reach his eyes as it typically does. "that- the colour of your skin is.. coming back, I believe."

"oh." poseidon raises a hand, glancing at the back of it. "I suppose- yes, it is." he looks back at zeus. "brother.. what are you doing here?"

zeus scoffs. "what- I cannot visit you when you are ill?" he says, hoping he sounds more flippant than he suspects he does. "am I not typically kind?"

poseidon decides not to answer the second question. "it's simply out of the ordinary for you." he says cautiously, on instinct. "besides, do you see another soul here?"

"you need rest!" zeus says, as if it was meant to be obvious. "it would be rude to interrupt-"

"zeus," poseidon says, and zeus stops in his tracks. "why are you here?"

zeus opens his mouth to say something along the lines of 'it's my duty', or 'do you think me so heartless?', but nothing of the sort comes out. in fact- nothing comes out at all, to both his and poseidon's surprise, other than a painfully quiet exhale, containing far more emotion than he ever wants to express in his life again. something shifts in poseidon's expression, as if he understood what that meant, and zeus is about to blast them both into ash when poseidon reaches a hand out.

"brother, I will be fine." he says, and it suddenly occurs to zeus that he's offering to hold his hand. without his say, zeus' eyes dart to poseidon's amputated arm, something seizing in his chest in a way that has not occurred in centuries. "if kro-"

"I know." zeus says before poseidon can continue, like he can dispel the realisations from the two of them if he just talks loud enough. "you shall make a full recovery. apollo is an excellent healer- he is my son, of course."

"yes." poseidon says, dropping his hand. zeus can’t help but feel as if he’s lost something. "but I will not let that mortal wipe me off this earth." he says, with a bite of malice in his words that suggest he’s being a little more truthful than he probably should be. "I will not give him the satisfaction." he looks at zeus. "just as I did not give our grandfather the satisfaction. I have dealt with worse."

"must you-" zeus starts with the intention of criticising his brother, when his voice fails him as it has never done before. "must you say that?"

poseidon gives a little smile. "brother, it has been millennia. you cannot fault me-"

"you did not have to watch." zeus hates this—the way his voice betrays him, the sympathy in poseidon's eyes, the memories his injuries bring to the surface of his mind. hating it does not make it disappear, no matter how much he wished it would. "both times- I had to watch. I cannot- I will not let you leave once again."

poseidon raises his hand, and this time zeus does not hesitate in taking it, desperately trying to convince himself it is for poseidon's comfort, rather than his own. "I have no intentions of leaving. you are king of the gods."

"in which case, I order you to remain." zeus says, and he feels just as he did all those years ago—playing make believe with his brother, imagining what life would be like if they were on top. "you cannot disobey a royal order."

"I would not dare." poseidon says in that mock solemn voice zeus remembers all too well. he finds that his throat is suddenly tight at the memory. "the all-powerful zeus could strike me down if he so wish-"

zeus decides not to remember what he does next. he does not recall how he ended up with his arms around his brother, nor does he recall blaming the dampness on his face on poseidon's hair. he most certainly has no memory of the way poseidon's embrace felt so painfully similar to how it used to, and it'd be impossible to say if his brother muttered comforting words into zeus' hair as he once did.

poseidon remembers, though. the gentleness that was so clearly out of zeus' nature as he did his best to avoid upsetting his tender wounds, the familiarity of his brother in arms mixed with how bizarre it felt to be equal in size after centuries of memories of his baby brother. he remembers feeling silently grateful for zeus' sobs masking his own, for odysseus—somehow—landing them both in this situation, and he certainly will not forget the whispered 'I think I missed this,' for a thousand lifetimes.

#epic the musical #epic zeus #epic poseidon #famtheon #don’t ask me who the narrator is idk #I was trying something out GKDDJ #also like. I wrote this all in like 6 hours #it's 4:26am which is not ideal but MAN i am on a roll with this writing stuff #hi epic fandom i’m aroace and could not care less about how attractive the characters are and put arguably too much thought into Lore #do I need more tags I don’t know #i’m used to mcyt and that has like a million tags for one character so this is new for me #platonic!!!!! very much platonic and familial ty #wren writes #I wrote half of this whilst listening to I can’t help but wonder and will you fall in love with me again on loop #so liek #also like I said. it's 4am so if it's a bit weird blame it on that

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