#no one I know says they like their disorders and don’t want treatment. bc it hurts and fucks the body up and can kill.

[skzfairyyydreamz]

hi!! Ik this isnt very cheerful for ur early request😭 but if u r doing headcannons can i request straykids w an s/o whoes insecure maybe about like acne?? 🫶

Bf!Skz when s/o is insecure about acne❣️

Genre: Fluff, Comfort, Bf!Skz x gn!reader

A/n: Sorry for the wait with this one my love i’ve been a bit busy but i hope you enjoy! Feedback, replies, and reblogs are greatly appreciated! To anyone who may be struggling with acne, skin issues/disorders etc know that your beauty grows from the inside. so don’t ever let something temporary define you. You are so loved. Thank you for being here. Sending big hugs to all who need it right now. 🫂❤️ ~Fae 🧚🏽‍♀️ (M.Lists)

(dm’s requests and taglist are open!!)

© Skzfairyyydreamz - Plagiarism is a crime. Do not repost, alter, translate or copy without my consent.

Chan

Channie is Definitely the “i know you better than you know yourself” kind of Bf so he notices everything about you. Especially when you aren’t happy with yourself.

Physically not being able to sit back and watch you look at yourself in the mirror with disgust; he walks over to you and pulls you away from the mirror.

“Stop that” “stop what?” you immediately respond trying to walk past him avoiding eye contact as if your mind wasn’t racing a mile a minute with negative thoughts about yourself.

quickly pulling you into a tight embrace “C’mere you know you can’t hide from me my love” he says in a soft whisper as he began pressing kisses to your head and the side of your face. You then realize there was no escaping this conversation.

“You are so, SO beautiful and you literally have no idea.” You hug him back burying your face into his chest as your eyes start to water still refusing to look him in the eyes. “but i don’t feel beautiful channie… my skin looks so nasty right now” “it doesn’t matter honey, it’s temporary. Acne comes and goes, its natural bc you’re a human. You’re MY human and a little breakout isn’t going to change the way that i love you or the amazing person that you are. so don’t let it change the way you feel about yourself.”

After a few moments of silence Finally lifting your head up to look at him properly for the first time that morning, you see a smirking chan as he takes his thumb wiping away your tears “oh if only you could see yourself through my eyes darling… ”

Lee Know

is also SUPER quick to notice when you’re judging yourself.

i definitely see Lee know being an aggressive lover so off the rip he is not having it if his s/o is feeling ugly and unhappy with themselves.

Will definitely force you to do self love affirmations.

Standing in the mirror together as he hugs you from behind “Chin up .. now repeat after me…”

on the days you really struggle he is patient but very firm with you bc he is such a loverboy and will NOT accept ANYONE speaking down on the love of his life , not even yourself.

“Go on jagi … say it. We’re not moving until you love yourself!”

Changbin

Soft binnie ofc is very understanding and will also reassure you.

will let you rant and complain about how you feel listening carefully without interrupting.

Will definitely kiss all your breakouts and blemishes.

“Dont worry baby give it 2 weeks tops you wont even remember it was here.”

constantly reminds you how beautiful you look at random times during the day.

“Acne is temporary but my love is forever” he aggressively covers your face in kisses as you fall into a fit of giggles.

Yes .. very cheesy in his true cute binnie fashion lols

Hyunjin

will spoil you ROTTEN to the core.

the very second you complain about the smallest breakout he’s already on the phone booking you facials and skin treatments at a luxury spa.

You come home from work to see a huge gift basket on the kitchen counter overflowing with expensive skincare products. Facial cleansers, serums, toners, oils, spf’s, moisturizers, you name it, its in there.

“Jinnie .. baby what is all this??” “if my honey wants clear skin, then thats what you’ll get” “i swear i don’t deserve you” you say with teary eyes

“wait wait dont cry yet i have something else for you” “HUH??” in confusion and disbelief you watch hyunjin run off and return with a canvas. He turns it around and its a painting of you with the most beautiful flowers blooming from your face in the exact same spots you began to breakout a few days prior.

Han

Another aggressive lover.

you start pouting to him about your skin and it somehow turns into a mini lecture.

“Jagi your acne is flaring up again bc you’ve been too stressed out. how may times do i have to ask you to leave that fuck ass job and just let me take care of you!? “But ji-” “And you stress eating all this junk food isn’t helping either!”

he’s definitely holding you accountable for eating cleaner and making sure you drink enough water throughout the day

And if you fail to do so he is definitely on your ass about it! 😂

Felix

Lix is very comforting when you come to him in actual tears the day before a red carpet fashion event you two were attending together. “lix i cant go like this, look at my fucking face??” “Hun it’s really not as bad as you think, i promise.” “it is lix! i dont know how to cover this up” you began to cry again “would you feel better if i called Maya to come give you a professional full glam for tomorrow?” he reassures you hugging you tight and rubbing your back while already reaching for his phone to text his makeup artist.

But he also disciplines you about talking bad about yourself.

He has this rule where you can only make one negative comment about yourself a day. And every time you break that rule he throws one of your beloved pocket mirrors away (you had a LOT and he knew that)

“ Ew why do i-” “ EH?!? what was that!?” he glared at you with a raised eyebrow. “Gimmie me!” “But lix wait- we’re in public i need to know how my skin looks!” “idc hand it over.. you look beautiful and since you cant be nice to yourself now you’ll just have to take my word for it.” he cut you off with his hand out.

accepting your defeat you sigh loudly closing the compact mirror putting it in his hand and pouting as he got up with a smirk walking away to throw your 5th mirror this week in the trash

Seungmin

much like seungmin you are very strong and independent, you keep your “burdens” to yourself trying not to complain too much or trouble anyone with your issues. Especially if you are insecure about them.

but minnie knows when you’re struggling.

he knows you get a bit agitated when you dont feel your best and thats when you begin to distance yourself a bit more.

His love language being acts of service he would do small things for like make you natural homemade remedies like his mom used to do for him anytime your skin would flare up real bad.

after getting out of the shower still pouty from a long grumpy day, “here” he hands you a spray bottle. “ What’s this min? ”

“Aloe vera face mask” he says simply giving you a kiss on the forehead and walking away not wanting to make you feel bad for bringing up something he knows you’re insecure about.

i.n

whenever you’re breaking out jeongin does everything he possibly can to keep his lover happy.

he will definitely help you create a WHOLE NEW skincare routine.

he’s working overtime researching different products and the ingredients that would work best with your skin type.

even tho you are not happy about your acne he thoroughly enjoys your new way of spending quality time together.

“you know you don’t have to make this an US thing, right? Your skin already looks great” “how about you mind your little business and pass me the toner” you try to hold back a laugh as your sassy boyfriend stared you down through the mirror of your shared bathroom.

buying and trying a ton of new skincare products together.

rating which ones you liked best and which ones didn’t work at all for you.

he will even book you an appointment to see a dermatologist if you need to and ofc he’s gonna be going with you!

Taglist: @hanniemylovelyquokka @milknhoneyracha @tinyelfperson @jiisungllvr @turtledove824 @laylasbunbunny

buy me a coffee?

[scarlet--wiccan]

Is Pietro a sociopath? Bc I read this thing from RomaPop that repeatedly calls him one but I don’t remember reading anything like that?

https://hopeburnsbright.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/romapop-booklet-2016.pdf

I'm not an expert on psychiatry or personality disorders, so please take what I'm about to say with a grain of salt.

No, I do not believe that Pietro has ASPD or any related condition. I don't believe that the text properly supports that, and I don't believe that it would be a correct interpretation of the character based on my admittedly limited understanding of the matter at hand. In Scarlet Witch (2015), Wanda and Pietro get into a fight and she accuses him of being a "textbook sociopath." I believe that this terminology was misused and incorrectly applied, and I believe that this statement, much like Wanda's earlier diagnosis of "schizophrenia" in House of M, contradicts prior continuity and character treatments. Since then, I do not believe that notion of Pietro being a "sociopath" has been revisited.

A lot has been said in modern comics about both Wanda and Pietro's mental health, but a lot of it has been pathologizing and ableist, with an unspoken racial element that leaves a very poor taste in my mouth. Obviously, that includes HoM and the 2000s in general, which was just a really destructive period for both characters, but I think it also includes a lot of Peter David's earlier depictions of Pietro and the way his powers affect his behavior.

I tend to get kinda touchy when people want to ascribe certain conditions to either twin, because the material that this perception is based off of is often harmful or just inaccurate, and I think it gets in the way of actually exploring the more compelling, meaningful aspects of Wanda and Pietro's mental health or trauma. When it comes to these specific labels, like "sociopath," which have been applied to them in the past, I would rather disregard those statements, and maybe retcon them by having characters to talk about why they said, that while acknowledging that it was incorrect or misinformed.

For me, the gold standard of modern Pietro characterization is still Quicksilver: No Surrender, which takes a much more realistic and sympathetic approach to the character and all his flaws by focusing how the isolation and trauma he's experienced has caused him to develop unhealthy patterns. From there, maybe we can start to develop more specific language and diagnoses for the mental health challenges he and Wanda face, but I want it to be about their actual lives, not their powers.

And I should say, I believe very, very strongly, that stigmatized personality disorders deserve to be represented with humanity, dignity, and empathy. I just don't believe that this has ever been the case with this character.

I'm familiar with RomaPop and Vicente Rodriguez's work. I think there's a tendency for activists to speak about comic books and other typically niche media without necessarily developing advanced literacy in that media. I've noticed that a lot of people who, you know, do very good work discussing Romani issues, tend to make erroneous statements about comic book characters like Pietro, Wanda, Magneto, Nightcrawler, etc. because, I mean, they probably haven't read all the material. It takes a lot of time and commitment to become familiar with comic book lore and develop a clear editorial perspective on it.

[royalbilliards]

i would LOVE to hear your opinion on maruki's therapy bc i see a lot of ppl saying he sucked as a therapist and i've never seen one so i can't really say anything with certainty...... but idk, i want joker to have at least an okay therapist just because it's a nice touch. also i think it's more satisfying narratively when maruki is someone joker can lean on for support and get attached to, but then has to oppose because shitty actualization. idk. pathetic wet man makes me go brrrrrr

Welcome to the autism zone.

So a lot of my thoughts on maruki’s therapy comes from my own experiences with a therapist in the past (I’m trying to get a new one right now) but. A lot of what Maruki’s ‘confidant perks’ and what they’re called suggest he’s giving Joker treatment for anxiety and depression, which makes a lot of sense given the way he acts in public outside of the joker persona, and the situation he’s in at Shujin (being bullied, for lack of a better term because it’s 5 am and I just woke up, and ostracised due to Kamoshida spilling his criminal record).

Practices like mindfulness and wakefulness sound like bullshit when you first have to start them, mostly because of the names, but the practices themselves are grounding techniques, being able to be present in your body, aware of your surroundings, and not letting yourself spiral via panic or depression and stuff. Detox is a term for drug addiction and alcoholism rehab, they’re not exactly practices we know Joker needs help with, but they’re most likely preventative measures, so that he doesn’t go Down those paths BECAUSE of his situation, which honestly makes sense, depression, anxiety, bullying from peers and the rest of it, including his criminal record and the way Japan treats students with criminal records, it makes sense that Joker could have easily gone down those routes if he didn’t have his friends and the metaverse to blow off steam and have an outlet for his emotions that he isn’t allowed to have in his day to day life. Flow is also a form of therapy treatment for handling depression, and mostly focus’ on capturing moments of positive mental states and allowing yourself to be completely focused and involved in Enjoyable activities that make you happy.

Because all of these therapy treatments that we get named from his confidant perks are Real therapy treatments that both Work and are widely used to treat specific mental health problems (Depression, Anxiety and Self-worth) we get both an insight into how Joker is actually feeling about things outside of what he shows and how useful these techniques are in his actual day to day life, because he’s using them to handle stressful situations in the metaverse.

There’s also the fact that Before everything, and AFTER everything, Joker doesn’t seem to hold much animosity towards Maruki, yes Akechi does and he’s Totally allowed to hate him, but neither Yoshizawa or Joker do, when Yoshizawa is more than justified in being angry and frustrated with him. And it might just be due to the abysmal lack of characterisation Yoshizawa gets, but mostly she seems like she too, like Joker, WANTS to help him, because we know that Maruki himself struggles with Self-worth problems, delusions of grandeur, a messiah complex (in both definitions of the term) anxiety and depression (along with a few other spicier things I don’t feel like mentioning because I’d need to bring up the psa’s on how demonised disorders need to be treated with respect since no one can do that on the internet). But there doesn’t seem to Be animosity between the three of them. Mostly just worry about someone they both cared about, and trusted.

There’s also the fact that, Jokers interactions with Maruki do not End After you help him with his research, we’re just cut off from the interaction at that point, because Joker in canon is explaining to Sae other more important things, he probably doesn’t feel the need to tell her the confidential therapy treatment he’s receiving at school. Their interaction continues, we get a fade to black, so it’s obvious he is getting actual therapy treatment, but Maruki has probably picked up on Jokers earth shattering savior complex and is easing him into the idea of therapeutic treatment by having him assist in his research, so Joker is more inclined to accept the help, since it’s a Transaction to Joker. If Maruki had more time to be Jokers therapist, and I assume he would have at some point Offered to continue his work as Jokers therapist after his tenure at Shujin ending, he would have eventually been able to work on that with Joker, and weaned him off Needing to help people all the time, and viewing social interactions as a transactional thing.

Anyways, yeah, I don’t think Maruki is a bad therapist outside of the horrors, I think people just don’t think about it because it isn’t spoon fed to them in a social link interaction, which is where the assumption that he’s Only using Joker as a sounding board comes from. But what would I know I just did media studies and have a special interest in analysing media, SHRUG

[liu-lang]

another therapist session where I had to repeat the same things since the first session. my psychiatrist and therapist were supposed to talk last Thursday April 13 but they didn’t…..which is frustrating since my therapist is still adamant about her diagnosis. today we went over updating my treatment plan where there was heavy emphasis on reducing self-harm behaviours (eating disorders behaviours are classified as such). This whole time I’ve been very perplexed and confused why every time we talk she is very concerned that I am a danger to myself. I clarified with her that I haven’t engaged in self harm for months and have gone years without doing it, without the thought of it crossing my mind. she asked me what’s made me stopped there last few months and I let out an exasperated internal sigh bc it just means she hasn’t been listening to anything I’ve said ….In previous sessions, I told her about cancelling the surgery back in Dec, infusions, follow up appt with haeme/onc - like I can’t afford to resort to these behaviours anymore bc I’m too physically sick, I don’t have any desire or interest in them…. whyyy would I do infusions only to undo all their effects by engaging in self harm ? the infusion centre is a depressing place (nurses are very nice and welcoming, the place itself is as optimistic as can be ; it’s more so the thought and saying out loud «I have to go to the cancer centre» that is depressing) …lastly my mum also stopped with the weekly phone calls for over a month now which is a huge stress relief and it’s Ramadan

But now a part of me thinks anything I say, she will take as conforming her diagnosis and the treatment is helping. There were long lapses of silence again during the session. I told her again I felt like this diagnosis didn’t fit and she ~*~kindly reminded~*~ that we went through the DSM 5 last weekend and by her assessment I do meet them. In my head, I kept thinking …well my psychiatrist doesn’t think so…. but that is besides the point…bc now I have to wait one week more for them to talk. Here I am this session réalising she has a misunderstanding of the severity and frequency of my self harm (which is one is the criteria ?) ….again I feel like she’s come to this diagnosis bc she doesn’t …listen to me.

We didn’t even get to talk about the last infusion, my feelings around it, how it didn’t go so smoothly, how I have what feels like an infection but the culture came back no growth again but my dr wants me to drop off another sample once I’m done with the antibiotics the urgent care dr prescribed me for 7 days. I just didn’t know what to say to her ; my mind was blank and I felt belittled and talked down to. I know I need to change therapists …but I’m continuing to wait until she talks to my psychiatrist

[schizosupport]

Hey there! Hope you are well, I have a bit of a complicated question that I’m not sure you can answer, I’m seeing my psych in two weeks but it’s a burning question and my mental space isn’t good enough to research. I have treatment resistant schizophrenia, but I also think my consciousness is more of a plural one, like I just don’t think I have a single consciousness, i can’t tell if the extra conscious states are from my schizophrenia or possibly from the repeated childhood traumas. Also how do I go about phrasing this to my psych? She’ll take me seriously cause she’s the coolest psych around but I don’t speak this eloquently in real life and I want to make sure I get my point across. Thanks so much !

Hey there! Sorry it took me a while to get back to you, I'm traveling with a friend! I have not slept in a while, so I apologize if this is unusually meandering.

Ok so first of all, I am to a large extent of the opinion that you have the final say on how to interpret your own experiences, but that doesn't mean that my input or your psychiatrists' input can't be very valuable.

You've said here that you are diagnosed with chronic schizophrenia, and that you experience your consciousness as 'more of a plural one'. You also mentioned repeated childhood trauma.

So first off, here's my two cents, but keep in mind that both you and your regular psych know your experience and situation and history better than I, a rando with too many fucking cents on my person at any given time :P

But the one thing I may be able to provide is perspective and knowledge, that you are currently struggling to gain bc your mental health isn't a place to research stuff. And honestly, this is also one of those things that present a rabbit hole of research and opposing views etc. Even I, despite this being something of a personal interest of mine, have barely skimmed the surface.. And anyone who tells you that they know all there is to know on the subject, and can give you definite answers, are conceited, ignorant or naive.

First off, I am curious about what it means when you say that you experience your existence as more of a plural one. I think that elaborating on that experience would be the key to communicate this experience of yours. I'm asking because from the phrasing, I can interpret this in various ways, which are all potentially consistent with the other known facts.

You have chronic schizophrenia. So a lot of people with schizo spec disorders experience variations of what is known as 'ipseity disturbance' or 'self disorder'. It's one of those concepts that is hard to boil down, but it often includes hyper-reflectivity upon "the self", seeing the 'self' as separate from the person perceiving the 'self', potentially perceiving yourself as having multiple selves or even no self at all. Apparently for a large part of the population the 'minimal experience of self' is a given that very much 'just is', there is nothing for them to reflect upon, because their sense of minimal self is the act of being itself... In a way.

I'm not sure I'm managing to explain this very well, but my point is that in certain ways experiencing your self as "more of a plural one' could be congruent with ipseity disturbance.

Because it involves a lot of feelings of "otherness" towards parts of your self/consciousness that other people experience in a more inherently singular manner. When thoughts don't feel inherently like your own, when your find yourself analysing thoughts in the brain to understand what 'you' are getting at - I feel like in a lot of ways, ipseity disturbance can lead to/be explained as a plural experience, and it's something I wish there was more talk about.

Second, you mention repeated childhood trauma, and I'm guessing you're bringing this up in the context of whether the plurality in your self-experience could be explained as dissociative barriers created to protect the self, between compartmentalized versions of 'the self'.

Third, I think some people regardless of trauma and mental health history, have a tendency to feel plural in their self-experience and/or thrive with a plural self-expression.

There are probably yet more ways that we could account for this experience, but let's stop there.

I think in preparation for the meeting with the psychiatrist, these are a couple helpful questions to know the answer to:

1) is the feeling of plurality scary? Comforting? Does it help you cope or does it make life harder for you?

2) Is the plurality of your consciousness more an inherent almost "philosophical" quality of how you experience your mind? Or is it more literal - there are a multitude of consciousnesses sharing (or not sharing) your brain/life?

3) if there are multiple consciousnesses - do you know how those other to yourself 'identify'. Do they claim names and other identity markers, do they have different opinions or feelings than 'you'?

4) if there are multiple consciousnesses, are they 'internal chatter', are they all parts of 'you' or do you experience it as if any of them ever 'takes over the reign' from 'you'?

5) if you experience such 'losses of control', how does that feel? Is it "you" becoming "someone else"? Is it a blackout? Is it like getting relegated to the backseat while someone else drives the car?

And so forth. I think it's important in a way to be clear in your own head about what they experience is like for you, because even good psychiatrists will sometimes read their own expectations into vague statements.

I also think it's worth mentioning here that while a lot of people will tell you otherwise, the lived experience of SOME people with schizophrenia and SOME people with dissociative disorders that involve identity compartmentalization, are actually very similar, for reasons that are too complicated to get into here. Another thing is that the two can definitely be comorbid.

A last thing is that personally, I try not to bring up symptoms/experiences with psychiatrists unless I think that them knowing is gonna be helpful to my treatment. It sounds like you got a great psych, so I don't think this is an issue, but when I personally tried to bring up my own experiences with plurality, they were immediately interpreted as active psychosis in a way that proved detrimental to the mental health of all of us.

So I'm mostly putting this here for other followers, who are debating whether to bring up something interesting/weird about their experience with a psychiatrist.. in a general sense most doctors err on the side of caution with things they perceive as potential psychosis... So at this point in my life I only bring up symptoms that are painful/bad to me, personally, bc I'm pretty tired of psychiatrists medicalizing every aspect of my identity and experience..

[cocobunnii]

i hate feeling sad .. it’s annoying. i’ve never understood people who say “ i feel so alone , like no one gets me “ cause there’s 8 billion of us yet u think the way u feel is your unique one of a kind emotion. but yet i feel like that.. i have BPD right ?? ( borderline personality disorder ) & so bc of that it’s hard to express my “ personality “ / emotions. & i heard this one girl say this so imma repeat it. “ living w BPD is like having “ love goggles “ on 24/7. but rather than love its life. “ & it’s so right ! cause life w BPD is agony. like in relationships , i’ll see it going amazing & i’ll self aware-ly , self sabotage the whole thing.. it’s like i dissociate the whole thing , im third person view , just watching myself ruin everything i worked hard for. . & it’s a never ending cycle. & yk what sucks the MOST abt BPD ?? no one seems to understand that a person w BPD , at least in my case , needs support at random times w random mood swings. w high intensity mood swings. good & bad. i get scared of my good times. cause i can’t tell if i’m manic & everything just looks & seems good for the moment or if i’m actually having a good day or month. & what’s worse , is doctors don’t even know how to treat BPD properly. there’s no meds for it which is bittersweet. the ONLY treatment is therapy. & ad much as i love therapy. . it gets old telling the same ol story over & over again , getting no where. & sure maybe i just need a new therapist. but i’ve tried since i was 12 i’m 22 now .. i tear up every time i think of someone dying. wether it’s a stranger or a loved one. cause ik someone will miss that person , if not me. irony of that is i can’t feel that way abt myself .. & it saddens me i feel that way. cause i think back to when i was a kid & i wonder what she would think of me now yk .. like would she think i’m as cool was she wants to be ?? is she happy of my decisions .. ? i overthink & judge myself sm & i wish i didn’t.. we’re our best critics tho right ? i’ve always wondered how’d i’d end up tho i’m the end. how i’ll meet my husband , my career , how i’ll look .. we all do ofc. but i also wonder if i’ll get to that point. that “ fantasy “. sorry i’m so sad rn. i don’t mean to be a downer. i just needed to vent.

[nukenai]

the things that hurt are surprising sometimes

stuff like the mods in book of boba fett being regarded by so many people are stupid characters when i really related to them

stuff like “if you had robot parts, in real life capitalism would ruin it forever because blah blah”

stuff like “your own personal wishes for your body bc of a complex psychological condition are offensive to real life people with completely different conditions”

the general idea that if a part of your body is not made of flesh that you have less humanity.

stuff like “you have to accept all your problems as part of you and your identity, and being negative against them goes against being body positive, which offends other people for some reason”

i just. i’m sorry, i’m not positive about my body! i hate it and it feels wrong and i want to fix it. I wish i could delete my disabilities and i don’t like them and wish i did not have them. I wish i didn’t have chronic fatigue or a spinal deformity or a fucked up hip from said spinal deformity. I wish I didn’t get headaches if i don’t wear my glasses for 10 minutes. I wish I didn’t feel trapped in a body I am utterly repulsed by in every way! it’d be nice if some therapist could help me learn “actually your body is beautiful and you should love yourself the way you are”, but... I kind of don’t want to! i don’t want to be in pain and disgusting and repulsed by myself all the time. I don’t think any amount of someone else telling me my body is good because it’s mine can help.

90% of the time i’m ok and can deal with it if i just don’t look at myself for very long but this has been a week of nightmares for me. i cope with it through my fanfics and through some music. but then i go online and see discussions of how my personal psychological condition, and the treatment for it I wish i could get, is somehow degrading to other people who have a completely different fucking problem than me.

and i don’t know if this has a name! i’ve tried researching a ton. “body integrity identity disorder”... no, I don’t want to just remove my limbs because I feel like they shouldn’t be there. They’re just THE WRONG ONES and I DO NOT LIKE THEM. Really it’s my whole body but it’s like, I’d settle for limbs, you know?? I’m fine with settling I’ve done it all my life.

And it has nothing to do with anyone else! I think if someone thinks their body is beautiful no matter what it is looks like, and their illnesses and conditions are part of themselves, that’s admirable and great for them. This is not about them because it’s about ME and how I cannot get there. Like, how could I talk to a therapist about this? The treatment for it is defeating the negative thoughts. To come to accept myself, maybe not be positive but to just be like “eh, this is alright”. Which is where I’m at a lot of the time, but it doesn’t make the problem go away. And I also don’t feel like any actual mental health professional would believe my problem is real. When I can’t even find any explanation of it or another person who feels like this on the whole internet? When I’ve tried researching for years and have only found recognized conditions vaguely in the same general idea as how I’m feeling?

To me it feels like the treatment for this would be someone showing me a red piece of paper, and telling me it’s blue until I believe it’s blue. Even if I’m saying “fine, I guess it’s blue, and I can live with that”. but it’s just NOT BLUE and I DON’T BELIEVE THAT and the only way it can actually be blue is if you paint it! Sure maybe it’ll be red underneath still. Maybe parts of the blue paint will chip off and you can see a tiny bit of red. But you’d still go “oh, that’s blue”, and actually mean it.

and I see things like “it’s the abled people who want different limbs/enhancements bc they don’t actually life with the issues” or whatever. But am I really in that category if I feel agonized suffering every day?? if I sometimes even see my own hands and want to throw up bc I find them so awful, if i wear long sleeves in 90 degree weather bc I just can’t look at parts of my body. If today, well, I guess I’m avoiding mirrors, and if I wear leggings under this skirt I can pretend. because there’s no real fix for me.

I’d just like a name for what’s wrong with me so maybe I could feel like I’m not the only person on the planet who’s ever felt like this.

but then again. someone could so easily look at me and point and say “you’re able-bodied and have no health problems” because I look skinny and wear clothes too big for me a lot of the time and stand weird so I only look crooked because I’m standing weird. But other people don’t get to decide whether my problems are valid based on whether or not they can see them. do you have any idea how many times people have actually told me to my face “but you’re not disabled” and I get to ruin their performative little day. it has happened MORE THAN FUCKING ONCE.

tl;dr i’ve been having a really bad body dysphoria spiral for a straight week and it feels like everything i see is making it worse. which is a great thing, because i possess a problem that literally cannot be fixed in any feasible way.

[mental-health-advice]

hey, I didn’t really know where else to go so I’ve decided to send this ask. So I’ve suspected I might have bpd for roughly two years or so now but I’m afraid to say I do bc of people who will get mad at me for self diagnosing and I’ve never been officially diagnosed. I want to get an official diagnosis partially just to get a professional opinion and partially for closure but I don’t feel safe doing so. My mom has said some choice things that are a little ableist towards cluster b personality disorders and I’m afraid she might disapprove of me or want nothing to do with me if I turn out to be right. I’d rather be in a situation where whether my parents learn of my diagnosis is completely up to me so if I really think it’s not safe to tell them, I can just not tell them. However I’m a minor so I’m worried I won’t have a choice and even if the doctor gives me a choice my parents will have to set up appointment and will pressure the diagnosis out of me anyway. I don’t really know what to do about this.

Hey there,

There is a big difference between self-diagnosing and suspecting that you may have a mental health disorder of some kind, so this is something to try to keep in mind. I know that you said that you do not feel safe in getting an official diagnosis/ assessment done in case others and especially if your parents were to know/ find out but, fortunately there are things that you may be able to do to get around this. For example, I know that you said that you are a minor, but different rules apply to different countries in the sense of what parents have to be told and what they don’t have to be. For example, in some countries, a professional only has to contact your parents if for example you are not safe from others or yourself (so if others are hurting or abusing you or if you have thoughts of suicide and have plans to act on them.) So if this is the case with where you live, then if you were to see a local doctor or GP and ask for a referral for an assessment to be done for BPD or the likelihood that you may have it, then your parents may never have to know. Of course though, this may make you feel guilty in the sense of them not knowing what you are doing, but I guess in a situation like the one you are currently in, it really depends on if the pro’s outweigh the con’s.

If you choose to be assessed and have some peace of mind in regards to possibly having BPD or another diagnosis including other personality disorders, then the mental health professional that you see will be able to help you to tell your parents if this is something that you would like to happen. Often professionals are really good with bridging the gaps between two people and especially when it comes to talking about a diagnosis. So, if you choose to let your parents in (and this is completely up to you, what you feel most comfortable with and also the timing has to be right for you) then the professional may (with your permission) set up an appointment with your parents and yourself to jut talk about what has been going on, how different behaviours can be driven by different diagnosis’, and most importantly help them to understand and answer any questions that your parents may have. When the time is right for you, talking about possible treatment options may also be discussed. Again though, this will all be driven by you and what you want to happen and what you do and don’t want your parents knowing. It’s so important that if you do choose to let your parents in, that you are in control of the process as much as possible. I know that this is all really scary though and so if you need anymore help or support then please do not hesitate to let us know!

I’m thinking of you and hope that you are going OK!

Take care,

Lauren

[heavyweightheart]

hey, do you have advice on a good way to figure out if you're undereating without trying to calorie count through like myfitnesspal or something that's going to be all gross about it? I have a really hard time motivating myself to eat so I strongly suspect that I'm undereating but I don't... know

i love that you called myfitnesspal “gross” lol! true. it’s hard to give specific advice on this without knowing your full situation and history, but there is one thing i can say w assurance: if you think you’re undereating, you’re almost definitely undereating. maybe the unscientific term i made up, “food dysmorphia,” can help you here. ;) for so many reasons, but mainly bc we have all been made so anxious about eating too much, we tend to perceive ourselves as eating more than we actually are.  i’m gonna assume you don’t have clear and reliable hunger and fullness cues (if you do, follow them!). some ppl really can reclaim calorie counting for anti-restriction purposes, to make sure they’re getting enough. i did that, actually, since i was already an encyclopedia of nutrition facts, and then i easily stopped when i transitioned to more intuitive eating. it’s important to count very roughly, and to round down, bc food dysmorphia can show up here as well. count to a calorie minimum and eat beyond it if you want to! not everyone can deal in calories, though, so there are apps that are recovery-oriented. recovery record is the one i’m most familiar with (it’s problematic, but you can tailor it to your purposes). it will help you stay on a meal plan or eating schedule. if you ever have access to a clinician, they can connect to your account if you want support or accountability.  you can also do a meal plan or meal schedule on your own. say you’re committing to eating 3 meals and 3 snacks per day. you can set alarms on your phone to remind you. you can text a friend when you’ve done one, or report at the end of the day. maybe keep a diary. and, watch what “normal” eaters (this is a fraught idea, i know!) eat. it can be so helpful to see other people’s plates to get a sense of what a typical amount of food is to eat as a meal, or a snack. if you had access to eating disorder treatment, you’d be eating heaping plates of food, often calorie-dense. no dainty influencer aesthetic plates--we’re fueling human bodies here. whatever method you choose or can access, i’m really glad you’re addressing your undereating! you may find that as you meet your body’s energy needs, you feel better in general and it takes on a momentum of its own. x

[notcolleen]

realizing how much i crave outside validation bc my current situation is: feeling really proud of myself for pulling myself out of a relapse that would have inevitably landed me back in treatment, but also being unable to fully voice that pride bc i never let anyone know how bad it had gotten lol

so that’s when i turn back to tumblr aka the social media platform that has honestly seen way too much of my Worst over the years (consider that a tw for ed behavior talk behind the cut)

[[MORE]]

for ppl that don’t know, i just got back from a ~10 day trip to oregon (half of which was spent on a greyhound, a nostalgic throwback to my Journey to Rainrock in 2014 lol) — and before i left, i was feeling really stuck because i was feeling better mentally (thank you ect and therapy) but also still trapped behaviorally with bingeing and purging and restricting/compulsive movement outside of that

i was in a virtual “emotional eating” dbt group, but i was not being honest with them because they made it clear that the group was for “disordered eating” and not a clinical eating disorder — and the director was someone i had previously worked with while inpatient, so she was very aware of my history, and i think on some level she knew i was holding back information lol but it was super anxiety provoking feeling like at any moment i could slip up with what i said and be kicked out

im technically still in the group bc they are able to hold my place for two weeks, but i also really need to go back to work and want to have full availability there so that i can actually get hours (and ultimately it wasn’t very helpful bc it truly wasn’t the right level of care) — so im gonna need to make an awkward phone call on monday and explain that i don’t need them to hold my spot (typing that out for accountability so that i don’t just ghost them, which is 100% my pattern 👀)

anyway, before leaving for my trip, my brain was 50/50 “you can use this as an opportunity to fully relapse and lose 46291846 lbs” and “you can use this as an opportunity to pull your head out of ur ass and start breaking patterns and build new neuropathways and all that fun recovery stuff” but either way the one thing i knew i needed to stop was the purging, bc it was destroying me physically and mentally and causing issues all over the place

so i can officially say it’s been 11 days without purging and while that seems insignificant in the grand scheme of life, i know how important those days are. this is one aspect where my black and white thinking is helping bc once i have built up any number of days, it’s easier (👀) to say “no this is not an option anymore”

(and yes the cheesy tracker apps are actually very helpful, especially when you get to collect trophies lol)

my brain is still a mess (every time i ate my mood crashed and the guilt i felt was ridiculous) and now i have to battle the part of my brain that wants to start recovering in the ✨healthy✨ way (aka quasi recovery) and im still struggling a lot with feeling the need to compensate with movement

but i also was able to create more safe foods (not in like a “black coffee is my safe food #anarecovery❤️ type of way, but in like a “i know now i can eat peanut butter and trail mix and other previous trigger foods and don’t have to purge”)

and i was able to have moments where i knew i overate (probably bc mentally, part of me was still like “okay after eating this im not allowed to eat until x and it will only be y foods and only if i walked z amount before !!” so of course my brain/body wanted the most food it could get in that moment lol and also because i was so used to overeating bc i knew i would purge after) but even with that, i still didn’t let myself purge so now i know i can survive if i do overeat. other aspects of my recovery might be iffy, and i feel like im constantly going back and forth with a lot of it, but i want to take purging off the table forever. and that feels possible rn 🙏

so that’s where im at with that. i also hid my scale right before i left (the next step is to donate it but i don’t want to be tempted when i get it out lol) so other than getting weighed when i have ect (although that was initially for them to send to my dbt group so idk maybe not) (also ultimately i want that to be blind weights but it’s hard to give up that sense of control in seeing my weight tbh) i won’t know my weight — and that’s kind of terrifying but i was never happy when i knew it anyway so ???

in other news, i shaved my head and i think i actually need to go even shorter bc right now i feel like a chia pet 🤡 and i have been called sir 3 times since shaving it, including being told that the mens rest room was being cleaned so i couldn’t use it (the woman ended up giving me my coffee for free after that bc she felt bad lol but tbh “sir” feels much better than “ma’am” to my gender confused lil brain 👀) which is funny bc other than the hair i think i present myself pretty ~femininely lol

in other other news, i love my cat and my cat loves boxes 🥳

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

advice and possibly resources relating to diagnoses and mental illnesses. tw verbal abuse

hi! i know I have multiple mental illnesses and some symptoms pointing towards a certain one .. I would like to see a psychiatrist and get things diagnosed and treated. and I’m also being tested for adhd/LDs and possibly seeing a psychiatrist for ocd soon. my problem is that my parent does not accept me being diagnosed with certain disorders like bipolar, psychotic disorders, or things similar. she will scream at me for it if I get dx with that and tell me it’s “my fault for making them think that and now ruining our life” and now “she looks like a bad parent and they might think she abuses me.” so even though I need to get these things brought up… she will not accept it and I’m afraid of that. I don’t think there’s a way for me to be diagnosed without her knowing. Does adhd screening include bipolar and other mood disorders? they might ask me questions like that and I’m afraid to answer honestly bc she will say the doctors are wrong and I’m bad. what do u do when parents won’t accept diagnoses? when I am 18 or 17 will I be able to get diagnoses on my own without them interfering or knowing?

Hi anon, 

That sounds really difficult and I am sorry that your parent is being dismissive of your diagnoses. 

In all honesty, it’s hard for me to give any specifics on the laws in your area surrounding your medical privacy without knowing your country (and if it’s the states, state laws differ sometimes) and your age. If you can write back in and give me some information so I can do some research for you, that would be helpful. But I also understand worrying and wanting privacy, so it’s okay if you don’t want to do that. But the laws differ so much from place to place. Where I am, in Canada, I was allowed privacy at 16 and was allowed to tell my doctors not to inform my parents of anything.  If you aren’t comfortable sharing that info with me, is there someone that you can trust to help you do research on the laws for you?

If you are seeing a therapist or another professional like that, it can also be possible they may be able to help you find ways to cope with your symptoms. Just because you don’t have a diagnosis doesn’t mean you can’t treat the symptoms. This doesn’t always work because in some circumstances, medication is the best course of treatment, but there are usually some coping skills that can help in the meantime. 

April

[hope--fully]

Not a medical professional just speaking from my experience as a sufferer, from a family of sufferers, and someone who knows a lot of sufferers bc obviously we talk about our shared pain: just wanted to take a moment to talk about migraine symptoms outside what pain killer commercials talk about bc a lot of people mistake bad headaches for migraines, a lot of people mistake migraines for bad headaches, and a lot of these symptoms can be really scary if you don’t know they are from migraines

You have the classic constant intense headache, usually centres directly behind one eye more intensely than the other but may also be a band of pain and pressure across your brow and eyes in addition to headache pain in other regions. You have the classic sensitivity to light, sound and smell which make the pain spike.

BUUUUUTTT you can also have the following with the pain- or sometimes before it or without it!

Nausea and perhaps even vomiting, this one is often associated with just the sheer intensity of pain

‘Brain fog’ or other cognitive symptoms word retrieval is a really common thing to have trouble with before/during an attack or people may have trouble with their memory in general, even forgetting what they were in the middle of saying

Decreased coordination and spacial awareness I walk into door frames regularly when I have one and some people get really butter-fingers-y

Vision changes or disturbances (aura) which can include squiggly lines, growing areas of blurriness, or blindspots- a relatively common form of migraine is what is called an “ocular migraine” where you may get these vision changes without pain or before the onset of pain. An ocular migraine can be unexplained, related to triggers which normally induce attacks in someone who gets other migraines regularly, or triggered by external one-off factors like wearing glasses with the wrong prescription, so having one does not necessarily mean you are likely to start getting them regularly. BUT if you regularly get migraines with aura it can increase your risk of some other conditions / effect your risk factors when taking certain medications so it is important to talk to medical professionals about it.

“Hang over” that’s what I call it- if you feel like you’re hung over the day after a headache it could be a rebound headache, a form of withdrawal after having taken pain killers to treat said headache, or it could be ‘the migraine hangover’ where you are not quite recovered and your body is exhausted from being in pain so long. Maybe sufferers I know have gone ‘it’s not just me that gets that?!’ when I’ve mentioned it.

Vertigo there is a whole type of vertigo attributed to migraines, with or without pain

Temporary, Partial Paralysis it’s rare; I’m not trying to scare you and yet I know two people who have had it, one of whom did not know what a migraine was and, though 17 at the time, thought the only possibility was that she was having a stroke. One sided weakness in the face and arm have been known to happen with migraines though most people who get it will only have it happen once in their lifetime even if they get 1000 other ‘regular’ migraines.

If you can think of any more or want to add caveats, disagreements, or agreements, please jump in.

The brain is a super complex organ so of course a condition which effects it can cause WIDE range of presentations. Migraine is one of those poorly understood conditions which really needs more research and public awareness because (according to wikipedia) 15% of the global population will have at least one in their lifetime. They are scary as it is, but can be even more so if you don’t know what is wrong with you or if it is dangerous or potentially life changing in the immediate future. There are also treatments for migraines above and beyond over the counter painkillers, lots of them, so it is good to know you can get relief from a variety of symptoms if you do indeed have the condition/disorder/‘get them.’

[prisonhannibal]

ive been following you for a while, since whatever url u had before this one, and idk maybe this is weird but u remind me that things get better. i remember when u didn't think you'd ever be able to get ur breast reduction, ive been following u through weeks with what seemed like hundreds of drawing and then months of inactivity, and sure ur some random person online i don't know, but it's so cool to know that you've been able to figure things out and improve your life, it gives me hope for my own 💗

Hi, this was a really nice message to get <3 It means a lot to me that you would think/care about me enough to take the time to send this, even though you don't know me.

I really had a roller coaster on here for YEARS before my diagnosis didn't I lmao...but understanding my disorder and getting the right treatment has made a HUGE difference and has been a big relief bc even if I still have symptoms I know what to do with them now, and I feel safer.

It makes me happy when people (online or irl) notice and comment on how I've changed/grown because I'm proud of myself for the progress I've made tbh. Like my last depressive episode ended over a year ago and I don't need weekly therapy anymore (which I've had since I was like 15). I can create art consistently (which is so important to me), I have a job I really like, and I'm studying on my own to take exams so I can finally graduate high school at 21 (I couldn't handle it on my first try bc of my undiagnosed disorder)

it made me so happy to hear that sharing these things can actually mean something to someone else like that blows my mind, I feel like I catfished people into somehow caring about me even tho I'm like words on the screen haha <3333

I genuinely am happy now, even when I'm not hypomanic. and I've said this before but I still feel like it's worth hearing if you're depressed: I used to think recovering wasn't worth it because I still wouldn't be happy, I just wouldn't be miserable. Like I genuinely thought everyone just felt neutral/empty/slightly bad and just accepted that life isn't good. I don't think that's true anymore, I think life is a good and beautiful thing, you know? I'm glad I'm alive, I'm grateful. There's so much to see here. I don't know if that helps, but I hope it can give some kind of hope or motivation because I wish I could tell my past self this.

I'm sorry for rambling so much, I just wanna say that I wish the best for you and I hope you can get where you want/need in life. and thank you<3

[cartoonyappreciation]

Okay so I’ve seen all the aus of Izuku with a ghost quirk... but let’s combine it with a villaindeku! Au and hopefully some dadzawa and a bit of dad might.

Trigger warning for mental disorders and near death experiences, abandonment, depression, manipulation... umm i think that’s it but lmk if I should add more bc the last thing I’d wanna do is trigger someone.

————————————-

Izuku develops his quirk shortly after his father leaves, when he and his mother get caught up in a villain attack.

Let’s say it was at their apartment complex and the building is collapsing and izuku get hit in the head bc I’m lazy and have very little creativity.

Causes a near death experience and when he wakes up, he can see ghosts.

When he tries to tell people, they write it off as trauma and eventually schizophrenia.

Of course, none of the “treatments” work bc it’s actually a quirk and ghosts are real.

As he gets older, he begins to accept his quirk more, but he also decides to hide it and pretend to be quirkless instead. Whether this is the result of some #goodparentmidoriyainko or #badparentmidoriyainko is up to y’all, depends on how much you wanna punish izuku (izuku my child, I am so sorry)

He starts hanging out on “the streets” more, doing little things to help restless spirits move on. He, of course, experiences lots of quirkless discrimination bc I’m an asshole. And plot.

Like in some of the other ghostquirk aus, his quirk makes him more susceptible to being attacked by ghosts, both physically and mentally in the forms of possession and hauntings. Ya know, like if a ghost or demon is haunting someone, they can affect their moods, thoughts, stuff like that.

It also, however, allows him to make ghosts around him more powerful, increasing their powers. He discovers this, of course, one night when he is attacked in an ally while trying to help out some poor sap of a spirit. He, being scared, activates whatever that park of his quirk is and the ghost helps him scare off/incapacitate/escape the villain.

This definitely leads to some child vigilanteism.... and if he saves shota aizawa’s life a few times to get on his radar... its not bc im soft for dadzawa. Its setting up further plot.

And then... during AFO and All Mights first fight..... AFO actually dies.

AFO, being a centuries-old asshole, would definitely not just cross-over. Of course, even tho I would love for the other ghosts to devour his soul, that doesn’t happen. I dunno if they just weren’t around or couldn’t interact, maybe he’s a powerful spirit for some reason, maybe he’s actually a demon, I haven’t decided.

He finds out through the grapevine about this kid and decided to do what he does best, be a manipulative, grooming asshole.

So he finds Izuku, already with low self esteem and upset with the system, and yes Izuku still wants to be a hero, he wants to fix the system. If supportivemidoriyainko exists in this universe, maybe she has helped him reach the conclusion that he could be an underground hero, or at least specialize in information gathering for heros. Even tho I love bamfizuki and waytoosmartforhisowngoodizuku, my brain won’t accept that a like 8-10year old would come to that realization without help.

Anyway, AFO starts haunting izuku, little whispers and shit, trying to convince him that the only way society can be fixed is to be broken, and basically just spewing hate and anger like the slippery fucking eel he is to this already tired and jaded child.

AFO, having stuck around him for a few years, is able to tighten his hold, bordering on possession.. and this is where stuff gets even more shitty for our dear protagonist

Either other ghost villains catch wind of what is happening, or AFO eventually convices izuku to go kill some villains, but he eventually ends up surrounded by all these evil ass spirits, affecting him and shit. He loses control and joins up with the league(maybe?) at afos insistence.

In my idea of ghosts, there would probably be a lot more ghosts of villains and vigilantes than heros, so even tho some ghost heros want to help izuku, by the time they know what’s going on, he’s already surrounded by a wholeass army lf ghostvillains so they can’t get close enough to reach him.

Shit happens, maybe following along with events from cannon. At one point there is a confrontation that I completely imagine happening to Halsey’s “Control” (i can picture the scene, even if I cant fucking draw) where izuku’s there, facing off against the heros and hero students and when he activates his quirk, hundreds... okay maybe I’m making this too op, too dramatic.... like 50 ghost villains appear, with AFO right there with his hand on deku’s shoulder. Maybe an adapted version of usj. In that case, ghostvillains, or at least afo wouldnt be revealed until toshinori arrived. Eraserhead, of course, recognizes him and is trying to understand wtf happened to him until detective tsu-whatever truth detector and all might explain who afo was.

This isn’t detective slander i just am genuinely too lazy to look up how to spell.

Thing is tho.... the OFA ghosts are there too, surrounding all might or whoever he makes his successor. They don’t appear to everyone else bc of course izuku wouldn’t power them, but they are trying to figure out wtaf is going on. They’ve been so connected to the host of ofa that they hadn’t really noticed the other shit going down in the ghost realm, but they sure as hell do now. They fight off against some of the villains, but in the end, can’t make it to him at this encounter.

Then we have another encounter, this one def follows “achilles come down” by Gang of Youths. Throughout whatever battle this is, you get various ofa holders, plus toshinori, aizawa, and some of the other neutral or good ghosts he’s helped and knew in the past to remember himself, gain back control from afo and some of the other villains.

Bc this is as far as my brain has gone, I imagine the hero’s get through to him, he uses his built up power to forcibly remove afo’s influence... i dunno if this happens by him like... forcing him to cross, outright destroying him, or just by taking his power and making him a weak spirit for the others to finally devour or something. The rest of the afo spirits can finally rest and izuku can start becoming a hero again.

[thevirgodoll]

My mental health has been stopping my success no matter how hard I try. I’ve been going to therapy and getting help and it’s getting a little better but it’s still unbelievably hard. I’d love to hear your tips on being gentle bc sometimes the thoughts get too much. And the people around me aren’t the kindest (working on getting out of this situation as well)

•get some sleep...ik this is the hardest thing but YOU NEED 8 HOURS - it changes everything...less sleep for me brings on an episode

•journaling: when things get rough literally just open a document or a diary and just let it all out, don’t worry about making it perfect...just do a stream of consciousness daily to analyze your thought process and be honest n real

•have a hobby...it will make you feel so much better

•remember that you have something impacting your brain and life...it is NOT your fault

•have someone that will hold you accountable and check in on you!!!

•get away from negative people...they’re a poison to you - if they happen to be in your space then limit your interactions with them and don’t give them any reaction. give them NOTHING! leave them fighting for attn

•be honest about your bad days!!! stop holding back on that because you’ll just feel like garbage

•depressive episodes? set timers to eat, set timers to shower, for everything

•prepare yourself when you’re feeling bad, have your snacks and movies and everything and just take it easy stop berating yourself just be nice and acknowledge that you’re sick and you deserve rest

•workout at home with a baddie playlist...get yourself moving or dance to some music

•have compassion for yourself the same way you have for other ppl. stop treating yourself like you don’t have feelings

•validate yourself...don’t overlook your trauma or pain. everyone is hurting. you’re allowed to hurt it doesn’t matter how far gone you think you are or how bad of a person your mental illness claims you are..you are doing okay and it’s going to get better. it’s not easy but it’s worth it. let your heart cry, and let your inner child catch a break. for once, just stop carrying the weight of it all.

•DONT LET ANYONE DEMONIZE OR STEREOTYPE YOUR MENTAL ILLNESSES!! this is why people invalidate themselves!! trust me i have a loottttt to say on this. people do NOT get it and i understand, trust me they use bipolar as an adjective (when it has multiple states??? so it makes no sense), they think my ADHD only means i’m smart and can’t pay attn (that’s...not even the half of it), and that there’s no disability or chronic illness...don’t let ppl downplay anything!!!!!!!! and don’t let ppl make you feel bad for meds either like? the ignorance!

•when intrusive thoughts come, take a deep breath and acknowledge how you’re feeling...question them...ask about the rationality...combat them with statements about yourself (“well i’m smart so that’s just not true.” “i know i’m loved so that’s just an irrational thought”). THE NEGATIVITY ITS ALL THOUGHTS & FEELINGS! but not facts

•combat more thoughts with comforting statements like

“i know this situation will pass”

“this feeling won’t last forever”

“i won’t fight my feelings. but i know they won’t be allowed to stay much longer. i’m going to focus on this opportunity to take back control of my life. my thoughts don’t control me, i do.”

“this will all be over soon. everything will be okay.”

•be honest in therapy...yes we can joke about lying but it does nothing but stunt your growth. tell the truth, the therapist is only there to help. this is a form of self love - you’re being honest and getting the treatment you deserve because you deserve to win!!!

•if you take medicine, don’t skip doses...no matter how hard the day is, you’re going to feel much worse if you skip any doses. you’re going to feel dead inside and absolutely horrible. medicine may not work one day but that doesn’t mean you won’t have a better day tomorrow. medicine isn’t guaranteed to always work, you’re going to still have bad days. monitor your progress though, if you have more bad days than good, schedule the appointment (if you have a mood disorder, consider the fact that you may be in an episode love). but do not stop meds without speaking to your doctor. and if your meds are working, don’t skip doses and stay hydrated and watch your alcohol intake / or don’t drink because all of these things can mess with the effectiveness of your meds.

•you may feel like being alone is worse than anything, but it’s not. your own company will end up being the best. this is the time to learn about yourself. cook new things. change your wardrobe. again, hobbies!!! learn new languages. have fun with yourself...do a exercise of 5 things you’re grateful for, qualities you love about yourself, and things you look forward to with yourself as far as mental health improvement. now on the flip side, don’t isolate yourself!!! let your loved ones in, and let them be there especially if they’re healthy to be around and they understand and are trying.

•suicidal thoughts: if you’re feeling this way, i understand...and because i understand i’m not going to make you feel bad about passively feeling this way. these thoughts that creep in are the worst, and they can cycle for hours on end even if you don’t WANT to do this. it’s going to be okay angel, i promise. don’t suffer in silence. and if you actively want to or still passively, please please PLEASE remember. you are important, worthy, and loved beyond measure... my inbox stays open for any and all concerns. love u all

[ablednt]

aren’t u that blog that constantly promotes self dx and bashes professional dx? like self dx is fine but it’s a last resort for people who can’t access prof dx.

I don't bash prof dx, first off. I fully understand and respect people who needed one for any reason.

However self diagnosis should never be treated like a backup for if you can't get a prof dx and here is why:

(Disclaimer: exact details vary by country making this not fully accurate in every country also I am not saying that treatment is bad or that therapists are inherently bad I am currently trying to seek therapy but any good therapist will treat you without a diagnosis if they are aware of the legal consequences of one)

You can and likely will lose your rights for your diagnoses. It's different by country but in the US if your diagnosed with things like DID, Autism, and probs a lot more you won't be allowed to go on HRT if you're trans. You may have your children taken away if you have any, you may be prevented from donating or receiving blood or organs, if you have abusive family members they may be able to put you under a conservatorship (what happened to Britney Spears) etc.

Literally the vast majority of psychologists do not study these disorders! Do you know what they do when they prof dx? THE SAME SHIT PPL WHO SELF DX DO. The dx process is exactly the same but with a professional dx you have someone who doesn't have that thing, who has no actual first hand experiences, listening to you talk about that thing and telling you whether or not they think you have it with literally no input from the community.

By saying every one has to try to be prof dxed before they're allowed to self dx you're saying that people of color should put up with blatant racism because there's so many documented biases.

Also the criteria that therapists use to diagnose is found in the dsm5, have you read it? I have, it says that autistic people cannot take care of themselves that they're prone to self harm bc of their autism and that they should have their needs ignored it uses all the labels that autistic people ask it doesn't. It says that even if an adult fits all the criteria of ADHD that if their parents arent available to say "yeah they sucked at school and were annoying" that you shouldn't diagnose them. The criteria for personality disorders, schizophrenia, and similar are all intentionally vague and/or exclusionary to one highly stereotyped set of symptoms. They literally admitted to trying to make the criteria for DID as specific and exclusive as possible because they wanted to remove it entirely because they believed people dxed with MPD before DID was coined did not deserve treatment.

The field of psychology started historically to abuse people, they were thrown into asylums and literally beaten and subjected to horrible conditions for any presumed mental illness. This actually has not changed very much at all, even in the last century a psychiatrist was caught physically abusing his patients and using the theory he made on DID to force them to keep coming to him for therapy. Psyche wards are notorious for mistreating patients there in every aspect and I've had psyche students tell me they believe that psychologists should have the right to physically harm patients. Children professionally dxed with autism are often physically harmed at school by their teachers, physical restraint is still used and it's killed multiple autistic students.

Children and teens in abusive homes have ableist parents often who may get violent or worsen the abuse or use a dx against them legally to trap them at home. Do you give them a pass for self dx? Except here's the thing you literally don't know who's being abused and who isn't and asking ppl that is really fucked up so you should be accepting all self dx to create a welcoming and safe space for them.

Physciatrists actually misdiagnose more than people mis-self-diagnose. Which isn't a reflection on the psychiatrist as much as the fact that people know their own experiences but they very often can't explain them. An example before I met someone who had OSDD1 and would explain it to me from first hand perspective no one would have ever suspected I had a dissociative disorder and was plural Because the only words I had for my experiences were "everything before a certain date literally wasn't me idk I'm just not the same person I was" "I'm a really good writer because I talk to characters in my head all day and they respond to things even when I'm not trying to think about them and they're real to me somehow idk lol" none of that sounds like DID but I was actually describing memory gaps from switches, internal communication and presence of fictives, etc. The best guest anyone had was depression and an overactive imagination. Self dxing is literally more accurate and accessible because people can look at the community and see the disorder explained from first hand experience.

Historically (but it's still happening in some cases) therapists would literally refuse treatment to anyone who talked to other people with their diagnosis. The case I'm thinking of is people with MPD (the dx that came before DID replaced it) would be refused therapy if they spoke to anyone else with MPD outside of therapy and even forbade them from going to support groups for survivors of incestual abuse because those groups advocated for the rights of people with MPD. To this day therapists often disrespect any and all ND/mentally ill communities because we happen to know our own literal lived experiences better than them.

Oh and prof dxes are often used against people legally so if anyone is in a minority group often targeted by police that potentially puts them in even more danger if they're arrested. Least we forget there's an entire field of study dedicated to criminalizing mental illness.

This isnt even half the reasons but I'm running out of spoons (I can source most of these things but I don't have the spoons so if anyone needs a source just ask)

I'm a firm believer that the need for prof dx not be pushed on everyone when it can have permanent and negative consequences and is no better than a self dx. If someone needs a diagnosis for access to medications, for financial support, or for any other legal reason then it very well may be worth the risk but they need to have the right to understand the consequences and make that decision. Imo it's professional dxes that should be not a last resort perse but it shouldn't even remotely be your first steps, your first steps are find the community and hear their actual lived experiences bc that will be so much clearer than anything a therapist who doesn't experience that thing can explain.

Also why do you care if people self dx? Why does their not having an Official Document saying they have their disorder bother you? I think it's deeply unsettling that you think everyone in the entire world needs YOUR approval to have something.

Jsyk the sentiment that self dx is lesser than prof dx is fostered by our capitalist nt society that's benefiting off of our abuse and systematic oppression so like you're literally helping us stay oppressed with this rhetoric.

If y'all really want to be progressive and anti-capitalist like most of this site does (and should) then that goes for disability justice too. Stop helping our own communities abuse and accept that not everyone has the luxury you apparently had to never be affected by your diagnosis ever.