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the-oblivious-writer · 2 months ago

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With Her I Die |16|

Past J.T to Eventual S.S x Female Reader

Chapter Sixteen: Yesterday's Sins

warnings: implied intimacy, grief and trauma, guilt and shame, graphic/disturbing imagery, intense emotional distress, and implied substance use.

note(s): nobody expects the spanish inquisition!!!

taglist: @morganismspam23 @slutforabbyanderson @serendippindots

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The cold wakes you first—a bone-deep chill that seeps through your clothes despite the body pressed against yours. You blink, disoriented, as consciousness returns in fragments. Rough wooden walls. The sharp tang of iron in the air. Lottie's arm draped possessively across your waist.

The meat shed.

Memories flood back with nauseating clarity: snow against your back, Lottie's challenging smile, the hunger that had consumed you both. You extract yourself carefully, desperate not to wake her as shame crawls up your throat like bile.

Lottie stirs anyway, her eyes opening with none of the confusion that marked your own awakening. She looks at you with perfect lucidity, as if waking up in the meat shed after what happened between you is the most natural thing in the world.

"Morning," she murmurs, voice raspy with sleep.

You manage a nod but can't force words past the knot in your throat. Your clothes feel wrong against your skin, too tight and simultaneously not enough protection against her gaze.

Lottie sits up, stretching languidly. "You're thinking too loudly."

"We should get back," you finally say, the first words you've spoken to her since... since everything. "Before they notice we're gone."

"They already know," Lottie says with maddening certainty. "Shauna was looking for you last night."

Something cold clenches in your stomach. "What?"

"She came to my sleeping corner. I wasn't there." Lottie's smile is faint but unmistakable. "Neither were you."

You busy yourself gathering your scattered things, desperate to avoid eye contact. "How did we even end up here?"

"You don't remember?" There's genuine curiosity in her voice. "You suggested it. Said you were worried someone would hear us."

The memory returns hazily—stumbling through the snow, drunk on adrenaline and need, finding the padlock unlatched and thinking how perfect, how private. You hadn't considered how it would look in the morning light.

"I need to go," you mutter, tugging on your boots.

Lottie watches you, unperturbed by your obvious discomfort. "You're afraid of what she'll think."

It's not a question, and you don't dignify it with a response. Instead, you reach for the door, pausing when Lottie speaks again.

"I meant what I said yesterday. Your threads are entangled. This doesn't change that."

You want to ask what exactly "this" is, what happened between you, what it means. But the words stick in your throat, and you leave without looking back, the cold morning air a welcome shock against your flushed skin.

------

The cabin is quiet when you enter, but not empty. Van looks up from the fire she's tending, her eyes widening slightly at your disheveled appearance.

"You're alive, then," she says, returning her attention to the flames. "That's nice."

You glance around, noting Tai's absence with relief. "Where is everyone?"

"Hunting. Foraging." Van shrugs. "The usual struggle for survival."

You nod, moving toward your sleeping area, desperate to change into clean clothes before facing the others.

"She was worried, you know," Van adds, just as you reach the corner that serves as your makeshift room. "Shauna. When you didn't come back."

Something in her tone makes you pause. "Did she say that?"

Van snorts softly. "Course not. But she checked outside like five times before bed. Kept saying she heard something." She gives you a pointed look. "Didn't sleep much either, from the sound of it."

Guilt compounds the shame already churning in your stomach. "I didn't mean to—"

"Save it," Van interrupts, not unkindly. "Not me you need to explain yourself to."

You finish changing in silence, aware of Van's occasional glances. When you emerge in clean clothes, hair somewhat tamed, she's pouring hot water into cups.

"Tea," she explains, extending a steaming mug. "Well, pine needle tea. Better than nothing."

"Thanks," you murmur, accepting the cup gratefully. The warmth seeps into your fingers, chasing away the last of the meat shed's chill.

The door opens before either of you can speak again, admitting a blast of cold air and Shauna, arms laden with kindling. Her eyes find you immediately, something flashing across her face too quickly to read.

"You're back," she says flatly.

"Yeah," you reply, hating the inadequacy of the response.

Van looks between you, then stands abruptly. "I'm gonna check on that thing. Outside. The important thing. That needs checking." She grabs her coat and slips out, subtlety abandoned in her haste to escape the tension.

Shauna drops the kindling by the woodpile, brushing pine needles from her sleeves with deliberate care. "Cold night to be out," she remarks, her tone deceptively casual.

"I, uh, lost track of time," you offer lamely.

"Must have." She meets your eyes then, her gaze hard. "Funny how that happens. One minute you're helping Lottie gather herbs, the next you're nowhere to be found until morning."

You wince at the precision of her aim. "Shauna—"

"No, it's fine." She holds up a hand, cutting you off. "You don't owe me explanations. We're not—" She breaks off, shaking her head. "Whatever. Just maybe don't disappear without telling anyone next time? Some of us are still a little jumpy about that."

The pointed reference to your previous vanishing act lands like a slap. "That's not fair."

"Isn't it?" Shauna moves to the counter, busying herself with the morning preparations. "Silly me, I thought leaving without a word was your trademark move."

"I didn't leave," you protest, setting down your barely-touched tea. "I was just—"

"With Lottie. Yes, I gathered that." She slams a pot onto the makeshift stove with unnecessary force. "Like I said, you don't owe me explanations."

"Then why are you acting like this?" The question bursts out before you can temper it.

Shauna turns, her composure slipping for just a moment. "Acting like what? Like someone who's tired of being worried about you? Like someone who's done watching you self-destruct?" She takes a steadying breath. "Like someone who cares too much about someone who clearly doesn't care at all?"

The last words hang in the air between you, heavy with implication. You open your mouth to respond, to deny or confirm or somehow address the rawness in her voice, but the door swings open again and Natalie strides in, followed closely by Travis.

"—can't be sure until we check the eastern traps," Natalie is saying, stopping short when she notices the tableau before her. "Uh, sorry. Did we interrupt something?"

"Nope," Shauna says quickly, turning back to the stove. "Just morning chit-chat."

Travis's eyes flick between you and Shauna, his expression knowing. "Uh-huh."

"Successful hunt?" you ask, desperate to change the subject.

"Not really," Natalie replies, dropping into a chair. "But we found tracks. Fresh ones. Might be deer."

The conversation shifts to hunting strategies and territory, allowing you to retreat to your corner under the guise of organizing supplies. The day unfolds with agonizing slowness, each hour marked by careful avoidance of both Lottie and Shauna. You volunteer for every task that takes you away from the cabin but not too far into the wilderness, haunted by Shauna's accusation that disappearing is your "trademark move."

By late afternoon, the tension has built to an unbearable pressure behind your ribs. When Tai assigns the evening tasks and pairs you with Shauna for water collection, you mutter an excuse about checking snares and bolt from the cabin before anyone can object.

The cold air hits your lungs like a rebuke as you stride through the snow, no destination in mind beyond "away." Your breath clouds in front of you, each exhale carrying fragments of thoughts you can't quite form into coherent patterns.

What happened with Lottie—it wasn't planned, wasn't even wanted in any conscious way. It was surrender to something primal, a momentary escape from the grief and guilt that have been your constant companions since Jackie's death. Since before that, if you're honest with yourself.

You're so lost in thought that you don't notice the footsteps behind you until a voice calls your name, startling you out of your spiral.

"Hey! Wait up!"

You turn to find Javi jogging toward you, his slight frame bundled against the cold. He's grown in the months since the crash, childhood receding faster than it should in the face of your collective trauma.

"You okay?" he asks, coming to a stop beside you. "You looked... intense."

A laugh escapes you, sharp and humorless. "That's one word for it."

Javi falls into step as you resume walking, tactfully giving you space to speak or not as you choose. The silence stretches comfortably between you, a rare gift in the close quarters you've all been forced to share.

"Do you ever just want to run?" you ask finally, the question emerging unbidden. "Just... keep walking and not look back?"

Javi considers this seriously, as he does most things. "Sometimes." He glances at you sideways. "Is that what you're thinking about now? Leaving again?"

The direct question catches you off guard. "No. Maybe. I don't know." You stop walking, forcing yourself to articulate the chaotic thoughts swirling in your mind. "I feel trapped, but not by this place. By... everything else."

"Like what happened with Jackie?" Javi suggests gently.

You nod, grateful for his perception. "That. And other things."

"Like whatever's going on with you and Shauna?" When you look at him in surprise, he shrugs. "Small cabin. People notice things."

"It's complicated," you sigh, the understatement almost making you laugh again.

"I bet," Javi agrees. "And now there's whatever happened with Lottie too."

You stop walking entirely, turning to face him. "How did you—"

"Like I said. Small cabin." His expression is sympathetic rather than judgmental. "Plus you both disappeared all night and came back looking... well, like you did."

Heat floods your cheeks, and you look away, suddenly fascinated by a distant tree. "It wasn't... I mean, it just happened."

"Sure," Javi says easily. "Things happen out here. It's like we're in a different world with different rules."

The assessment is so accurate, so aligned with your own unformed thoughts that you stare at him in wonder. "When did you get so wise?"

He grins, the expression transforming his face back to the boy he should still be. "I have my moments. Mostly, I just listen a lot."

You resume walking, letting his words settle into the spaces between your tangled thoughts. "I'm not planning to leave again," you say finally. "I just needed some air to think."

"Good," Javi says with surprising firmness. "Because it really sucked when you were gone. For everyone."

The simple statement hits harder than Natalie's anger or Shauna's accusations. "I'm sorry."

"I know." Javi kicks at a clump of snow. "Just don't do it again, okay? This whole 'stranded in the wilderness' thing is a lot less fun without you around."

You can't help the smile that tugs at your lips. "I'll keep that in mind."

"Cool." He points toward a cluster of trees ahead. "Want to check those snares you were supposedly going to look at? Might as well make your excuse legitimate."

"Lead on," you agree, grateful for his practical suggestion. "Though I warn you, my tracking skills are about as well-developed as my impulse control."

Javi laughs. "So completely non-existent, then?"

"I resent that," you protest, falling into the easy banter that reminds you why you've always enjoyed his company. "I have excellent impulse control. I haven't killed Natalie despite numerous provocations."

"A true testament to your restraint," he agrees solemnly. "Very Monty Python of you. 'She hasn't killed me yet, so I must be the Messiah!'"

You snort with surprised laughter. "I think you're mixing your references there."

"Probably," Javi admits cheerfully. "It's been a while since movie night."

The reference to your life before the crash—to normal teenage activities like watching films and quoting them endlessly—brings a bittersweet pang. "God, I miss movies."

"Me too." Javi's smile dims slightly. "And pizza. And my PlayStation."

"And showers," you add with feeling. "Real, hot showers with actual soap."

"And toilet paper!" Javi's enthusiasm for this particular luxury makes you both dissolve into laughter, the sound echoing strangely in the silent forest.

The moment of levity eases something in your chest, loosening the knot of tension that's been building since you woke in the meat shed. By the time you return to the cabin, having checked the empty snares and gathered a few edible plants Javi identified, you feel steadier, more centered than you have in days.

The respite is short-lived.

------

Dinner is a subdued affair, conversations flowing around you without requiring participation. You focus on your food—another watery stew, this one bulked with winter roots—aware of Lottie's occasional glances from across the fire, of Shauna's deliberate avoidance of your gaze.

"—don't you think?" Tai's question pulls you from your thoughts, and you realize she's addressing you directly.

"Sorry, what?" you ask, hoping your inattention wasn't too obvious.

"I said we should check the area where you and Lottie found those herbs yesterday," Tai repeats, her tone suggesting it's not the first time she's had to repeat herself to you. "Might be other edible plants nearby."

"Oh. Yeah, probably," you agree, carefully not looking at Lottie or thinking about what followed the herb gathering.

"Great. You can show us tomorrow," Tai decides, turning back to her conversation with Van.

You nod, though no one is watching for your response, and return to pushing food around your bowl. The stew has cooled, congealing slightly at the edges. Something about the texture triggers a memory—a flash of something you can't quite place, a feeling of wrongness that crawls up your spine.

"—not like it was much to begin with," Natalie's voice catches your attention, the words floating across the fire with peculiar clarity.

"Nat," Travis warns, glancing in your direction.

"What? It's true," Natalie argues, her words slightly slurred. She's been hitting the dwindling alcohol supply hard lately, dulling her edges with whatever she can find. "They were never actually dating. It was just... convenience."

You realize she's talking about you and Shauna, the assumption so wildly off the mark that it would be funny if it wasn't so painfully close to the truth. You were never dating—never put a name to whatever existed between you in the darkness, the comfort and connection that transcended simple friendship without ever being acknowledged in daylight.

"Fuck off, Nat," Shauna says quietly, her eyes fixed on her bowl.

"Am I wrong?" Natalie challenges, leaning forward. "Because from where I'm sitting, it looks like you two were playing house until she"—she gestures at you with her cup—"decided to bail, and now you're both acting like someone died. Again."

"That's enough," Tai interjects, her tone leaving no room for argument. "We don't need to rehash this."

"Fine," Natalie mutters, slumping back. "Just saying. Everyone tiptoeing around like there's some great tragedy when really it's just—"

"I said enough," Tai repeats, sharper now.

The conversation shifts awkwardly, the tension lingering like smoke. You stare into your bowl, suddenly unable to contemplate another bite. Something about the stew, the texture, the smell—it sits wrong in your stomach, bringing back that elusive sense-memory from moments ago.

You set your bowl aside, drawing a concerned look from Mari across the fire. She leans forward, voice low. "You okay? You've barely eaten."

"Fine," you murmur, forcing a smile. "Just not hungry."

The lie tastes bitter on your tongue. You're always hungry these days—all of you are, subsisting on whatever the forest provides, which is never quite enough. But something about tonight, about the stew...

"You should eat while you can," Mari insists, nodding at your abandoned bowl. "Winter's not getting any easier."

"I know." You reach reluctantly for the bowl, knowing she's right. Food is too precious to waste, regardless of your unsettled stomach.

As you raise a spoonful to your lips, another flash of memory breaks through—hands tearing at flesh, the heavy copper scent of blood, someone crying in the background. The spoon clatters against the bowl as your hand jerks involuntarily.

"Seriously, are you okay?" Mari presses, her concern more evident now. "You look pale."

"I'm fine," you repeat automatically, but the images keep coming, fragments of memory you've somehow buried until now. Snow-covered hands. A blade glinting in firelight. Meat hanging in the shed where you and Lottie...

Oh god.

You stand abruptly, bowl forgotten as nausea rises in your throat. "I need air," you manage, already moving toward the door.

"It's freezing out," Shauna objects, speaking directly to you for the first time since your morning confrontation.

"Don't care," you mumble, yanking the door open and escaping into the frigid night.

The cold hits you like a physical blow, but it's nothing compared to the horror building inside you as memories continue to surface—images and sensations you've somehow suppressed for weeks. Jackie's body, stiff with frost. The decision made in desperate hunger. The things you did. The things you ate.

You make it only a few yards from the cabin before your knees give out, sending you sprawling into the snow. Your breath comes in short, painful gasps as realization crushes down on you.

"We ate her," you whisper to the empty air, the words hanging visible in the frozen night. "We ate Jackie."

The memory crashes through your carefully constructed barriers: Jackie's blue-tinged skin as you all brought her body back to the cabin. The discussion about burying her, about waiting for the ground to thaw. Then the hunger, the desperation, Lottie's voice suggesting what no one else would speak aloud.

And you—you had helped. Had held the knife. Had tasted human flesh and told yourself it was venison, had buried the knowledge so deep your conscious mind couldn't access it until now.

Your stomach heaves, and you retch into the snow, the meager contents of your dinner burning your throat on the way up. You can't breathe, can't think beyond the horror of what you've done, what you've all done.

"Hey!" Mari's voice seems to come from a great distance, though her footsteps crunch nearby in the snow. "Oh shit. Guys! Something's wrong! I need help out here!"

The world tilts sideways as your vision narrows to a pinpoint of light surrounded by encroaching darkness. The last thing you register before consciousness slips away is the sound of multiple footsteps rushing toward you, and Shauna's voice, suddenly close, suddenly frantic:

"What happened? What's wrong with her?"

Then nothing but merciful blackness, swallowing you and your terrible knowledge whole.

#shauna shipman x you #shauna shipman x reader #shauna yellowjackets #shauna shipman #jackie taylor x reader #percy jackson x reader #jackie taylor x you #jackie taylor x y/n #jackie taylor #yellowjackets x you #yellowjackets x reader #yellowjackets

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ghostieblr · 10 months ago

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ok so i kind of want a canon divergent fic where Stiles & Derek know each other from their childhood (Derek is like 3-4 years older than him and used to pick up Cora from the same daycare maybe?)

the plot doesn't change till s3's finale, minus some of the character's deaths. Boyd, Erica, Allison — they all live. except, see, except stiles knows derek.

and derek knows stiles.

so post nogitsune arc where everyone can finally breathe, there is no other danger that is incoming, stiles pesters derek to call a "pack night" and derek begrudgingly texts so in the group named "awooo plus others." everyone's first thought is that derek has been possessed, or something, but then stiles records a video of derek saying it too and sends it via derek's phone. nobody questions who took the video, and they all come together for the pack night.

on the day of, everyone trickles in slowly, except stiles who was literally the first to arrive. he had derek go with him to buy snacks and groceries, and then they both come back to the loft to make food for everyone else. they have a mini food fight, and stiles' white shirt is littered with all sorts of condiments and food, so derek lends him one of his henley's.

"Dude, doesn't this hurt your werewolf sensibility?" Stiles asks, the henley in his hands. Derek rolls his eyes.

"Shut up, Stiles."

(he'll not admit it for a long while, but derek loves stiles' scent clinging to his own).

and then once everyone is there, derek and stiles realize simultaneously that there's not enough room for everyone to sit around, even if some people sit down on the floor. there's only one big couch, one armchair, and the rest is carpet around the sitting area, which isn't too big. which means that lydia, allison, scott, and jackson have taken the couch; peter has taken the armchair; isaac, boyd, erica, kira, and cora have taken the space on the floor in a way that there is literally only one person's space left, and that too is a squeeze. it's clear that scott was gonna ask stiles to squeeze on the couch with them, and that the floor space, beside cora, is meant for derek.

what happens is derek picks up the tv remote and stiles hands everyone their snacks and puts the rest on the coffee table, and then derek sits down on the floor, and stiles, without a single thought and without a single glance at scott, who is trying to motion for stiles to come sit on the couch, sits in the v of derek's legs. derek, of course, puts his arm around stiles' waist and pulls him closer, so that stiles is sitting on his lap, and they have one (1) bowl of popcorn between them that is half salt, half tomato. derek gives the remote to stiles and takes the bowl.

stiles is muttering about choosing a film. he insists, "since i called this pack meeting, i'll choose the film," to which erica says:

"batman, you called the meeting?"

derek scoffs when stiles puts on star wars. neither of them is paying any attention to the others, and cora and peter are enjoying the not-so-silent freak out from the others.

derek says, "not again, stiles."

"inflection, derbear, inflection! it is the soul—"

"—soul of language. yes, i know, stiles. but i fight—"

"—against the periods and commas because it's entertaining to see you squirm. i mean me. it's funny to you to see me squirm, you asshole!"

derek just smirks, and snatches the remote to fast-forward the beginning credits, to which stiles sings holy murder and snatches it back and rewinds to the beginning.

"great, now we have to watch it again. why do you never learn, derek?" cora gripes, and peter is just watching in amazement as lydia's eyes go big with the new information. she's getting it.

the movie starts, but nobody but derek and stiles are actually watching it. cora is sort of into it, but she's not into rewatching, so she's on her phone. peter is into watching and betting who will break first. the others are entirely focused on how derek and stiles are interacting, like stiles isn't fucking afraid of derek (at this point derek is still the angry, will break your hand in training if you piss me off alpha; at least to them), and that derek isn't fucking annoyed by stiles.

stiles and derek are just. chilling. throughout the movie, stiles settles into derek, and derek wraps his arms around stiles, and they're cuddling.

derek feeds stiles once every five minutes, because stiles just turns his head and says softly, "der." after the first 2 times, stiles doesn't even have to turn. once their popcorn is over, stiles reaches over and takes the hot dogs — nobody says anything about him taking four of it (one by one, not all at once) because duh — and eats one bite, then leans back to feed it to derek, and then just stays there while alternating the bites.

stiles is super engrossed in watching so he's 1000% oblivious to his surroundings, but derek isn't, and he's just fucking proud of providing for stiles and having him in his arms, showing stiles off as his.

he just doesn't give a shit to answer the other's questions.

so just. yeah. this. where derek and stiles are childhood friends, true mates, and nobody knows how close they are until they do, and they're like "wtf???" while derek is just super duper possessive and proud and stiles is oblivious until comments from the pack members makes him rethink things and he like stops doing the things he normal does with derek (scenting, cuddling, touching derek every chance he gets, spending all of his free time with derek... yeah). day 1 has stiles antsy. day 2 has derek angry at his pack because of course they're behind his stiles-starvation. day 3 has stiles having an epiphany and derek whining outside stiles' window until stiles lets him in and says, "how long have i been stupid?"

"this is the 3rd day."

"not — no. i mean like... how long have we been dating without dating?"

derek's eyes widen. heartbeat is going crazy. "you don't mind?"

"you have literally been treating out interactions as if we are mated, dude. i don't think that question has any merit now."

"don't call me dude."

"can i call you mine, then?"

and he goes to kiss derek when derek just smiles, this bashful little small smile, but derek backs off.

stiles sighs. "we are engaged to be mated, huh?"

"engaged to be engaged to be mated, actually."

"you mean to say you've basically pre-ordered me?!"

derek is horrified. "no! what the hell, stiles?"

"NOW you use inflection? wow."

they go back to cuddling like crazy, except now derek kisses stiles on the head, forehead, and knuckles, and stiles combusts every time because that is so sweet.

the pack never do get over this development. they get over stiles having magic in a week, tops, but derek and stiles? as alpha and future alpha mate? yeah no. impossible. still unbelievable. every pack night they watch these two instead of the movies, because it is one of the few times derek actually lets his guard down and acts non-asshole-ish to them.

#sterek #derek hale #stiles stilinski #teen wolf #the hale pack 2.0 #i just... have had this in my mind for so lonh #long* damnit #sh.rambles

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ceesimz · 1 year ago

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Reverie - Part 2

Autistic Reader x Barça Femení - part one here

Hey, welcome back for part two :) Thank you so much for the love, this genuinely wouldn't have been posted had it not been for the reaction to the first. Again, more things I wanna mention before reading. This part includes the aftermath of a bad meltdown, but the actual meltdown part is not written in. This was a personal decision because quite honestly there is no way to sum that experience down into a few words, it's impossible. The best example I have seen of a meltdown in the media is the character of Quinni in Heartbreak High on Netflix, if you're interested then you should watch that scene in the first season. I hope you enjoy this second part, thank you for taking the time to read it, let me know what you think :)

Your first Champion’s League game for Barcelona, a group stage game against PSG at home, didn’t quite go as planned.

From the first minute of the game, things weren’t clicking out on the pitch for you. Passes to and from you weren’t connecting, you were losing duels you definitely shouldn’t and you were missing key, game-changing shots.

Half-time came way too quickly, and to everybody’s frustration, the score was still 0-0. As everyone sat in the changing rooms receiving treatment or refreshing themselves with energy drinks and whatnot, the result wasn’t the thing at the forefront of Ingrid's mind. It was you. She could see defeat written all over you before the match had even concluded. It didn’t bode well what this game was doing to you. Before she could do anything, she was called away for a tactical discussion. Then the break was over and everybody was being ushered back to the pitch, and her opportunity was gone.

Rough challenges, an open goal miss, and a yellow card later, you were done for. Your streak was over, you knew what was coming and there was no way to avoid it.

Nobody heard from you for ten hours, nobody saw you at any point after the game, and quite frankly nobody knew where you were. Ingrid knew though. And if her gut feeling about what had happened was correct, she was going to need back up for this one. She hadn’t dealt with a situation like this for a while now, and she felt a little out of her depth.

“Why didn’t anybody stay with her last night?” Alexia asked with a deep-set frown, rushing to your flat alongside Mapi and Ingrid. “You guys live in the same complex as her, why didn’t you check up on her?”

“I don’t know, Alexia! If I could go back and change it, I would, I swear.” Ingrid replied desperately, looking through her keys to find the one to her old flat.

“Hey, let’s not argue. She won’t be in any fit state to deal with that, we can hash it out later.” Mapi attempted to de-escalate the situation whilst taking the keys from her girlfriend's shaking hands and quietly unlocking the door.

The thing they'd all been worried about made its presence known immediately. Ingrid’s heart broke, and she’d never regretted a decision more in her life.

By the door, your bag had been thrown haphazardly towards the shoe rack, causing the contents of both items to be strewn across the entryway. As the trio stepped past the mess and entered the main room, their concern doubled. There seemed to be two smashed glasses in the kitchen, one of the framed prints from your lounge wall had fallen down, a plant had been knocked over, yet there was no sign of you. The curtains were drawn, the lights were off, and the flat was deathly silent.

“What do we do?” Alexia questioned quietly, afraid of shattering the calm that had seemingly settled after the storm, and unsure what the best way to go about this was. She'd never really experienced anything like this before, at least not to this degree.

“Can you two clean up a bit? She will be in bed, I should go to her first I think.” Ingrid decided as her eyes were glued to your closed bedroom door.

“Of course. If either of you need anything, princesa, just shout for us.” Mapi reminded her, knowing that whatever was in store for her behind your bedroom door could be mentally taxing for her too. She nodded, and at that left the two Spaniards to clean up as she went off to do some damage control.

What greeted her when she entered your room was a sight she hadn’t seen in a long time. Not since the several hour journeys the pair of you would make throughout Germany to meet up, not since national camps, not for years.

Ingrid found you as a disfigured lump under the duvet, the only thing visible being your hair peeking out just slightly. Again, the lights were off and the curtains were drawn, but with it being morning there was enough daylight bleeding through the soft material to let her look around the room. Just like the rest of the flat, it was in a concerning state of disarray. That wasn't at the forefront of her mind though right now though.

“Elskling?” She called out softly, though got no response. Her only option was to step closer, around to the side of the bed you lay on to try and get your attention.

You were lay on your stomach, cheek smushed against the mattress, and most unnervingly of all, your eyes were open and staring straight ahead at the wall in front. The look on your face was hauntingly empty, yet agonised all in one.

“Hey.” Ingrid whispered, kneeling down before you, yet you didn't even acknowledge she was there.

It was that moment that the defender noticed the tear tracks, the redness to your face, and the internal agony and undertones of fear present in your blood-shot eyes. She swallowed the lump in her throat, broken at the sight of you, before gently placing her hand on your back atop the sheets.

“If you can hear me, min engel, just give me a tiny nod at least. That's all I ask.” The relief that flooded her when you did exactly what she said was immense, it filled her from head to toe, so grateful you were at least present in the room now.

“Thank you, that's all I needed.” She smiled sadly, delicately pushing a few strands of hair out of your face. “I'm going to sit here with you for as long as you need. María and Alexia are here too but they won't come in unless you say otherwise, they are just cleaning up for you. I love you, søster, I am always going to love you no matter what.”

Her words, her compassionate and caring words, broke through the trance you'd been in ever since your explosive meltdown had ended however long ago. Ingrid's unconditional love that she consistently showed towards you made itself known yet again, it being quite possibly the one sole thing that could get through to you in this precarious moment.

The taller woman panicked the moment she saw you tearing up again, worried that she had said the wrong thing, but then your arm reached out from under the covers and grasped desperately at the hand on your back.

“It's okay, it's okay. I've got you. I'm here, you're safe, and I've got you.” Her free hand came up to wipe the tears that fell silently, the repetitive movement of her thumb across your wet cheeks a comfort you clung onto. Meanwhile, the arm of hers you'd grabbed now had both your arms wrapped around it, eyes scrunched tightly shut to keep the tears at bay as much as possible.

It wasn't possible though, they were coming out thick and fast with no way of stopping them.

“Let it out, snuppa, you will feel better.”

And let it out you did; all the anger you directed at yourself the second the final whistle blew the day before dissipated, and a fatalistic sadness washed over you. You don't know how long you spent sobbing into the mattress, all you knew was that Ingrid was there and she wasn't leaving. She repeated reassuring words over and over until they finally registered, eventually helping you to calm down.

All that was left was an exhausted, now mindless shell of you, stuttered breaths sounding through the quiet room every so often. Ingrid's hand was tracing light circles on the palm of yours, whilst she was quietly suffering through a numb arm that you held onto still.

“Have you had anything to eat or drink since yesterday?” Ingrid asked, her assumption confirmed by the slight shake of your head. “Can I leave for a few seconds to get you something, or shall I ask one of the girls to do it?”

“Stay.” You could barely get the single word out; your throat was already dry and hurting from the exertion it had experienced in the last twelve hours or so, nevermind the mental challenge it was to speak.

“Alright, I will stay. Is it okay if one of them comes in then?” Another tiny, barely noticeable nod. “I will text them, thank you.”

No more than a few silent minutes later, there was a polite knock on the door, shortly followed by Alexia walking in with a tray in her arms. On it was a glass of water, a variety of snacks, some electrolyte tablets and even a box of tissues. She had really thought of it all.

Alexia’s eyes glanced up to where you were, before turning back to Ingrid with a questioning look in her eyes. Ingrid only shook her head, and Alexia took that as her cue to leave. It was clear, from just one momentary glance, that Ingrid still had more progress to make with you, so Alexia quietly slipped straight back out of the room.

When Ingrid turned back to you, all she saw was the sixteen year old version of you, crying in a hotel room hours from home after being dropped to the bench for an upcoming match. She saw the seventeen year old inside of you, the one that had gotten way past drunk at a party and had collapsed into a blubbering, destroyed mess on your bed after near enough carrying you home. She saw you at twenty, breaking down when she revealed she was moving to Wolfsburg, fumbling through the congratulatory messages whilst trying to come to terms with the fact your best friend was moving to a whole different country, feeling like the world was collapsing around you. You, twenty-three, leaving your last national camp, physically and mentally ruined, unable to talk, body and mind exhausted after a night of tears, frustration, and a soul crushing amount of remorse at the decision you had no choice but to make.

Every version of yourself, past and present, was right there in front of her; every version needing the support she was giving. Every version was still alive in some way, they would never die. With this disorder, things don’t come and go, they’re always there, ready to be triggered at any given moment. She had seen this one and the others a handful of times before, but you’d have them with you for the rest of your life. Your own cross to bear, something she’d never come to experience or understand, but if she can carry the load with you then she’d give up everything else in her life to do so.

“Are you ready to sit up? Ale brought in some stuff for you.” She said, her hand resting on your cheek and caressing it lightly.

You only shrugged, not quite ready to leave your space yet. If you moved now, you had to face the world again, had to recover from the night’s meltdown and move on. It was daunting, nothing short of terrifying, and the longer you could delay the process, the better.

“The three of us have cleared our day, should you need us. We’ll go at your pace, do things how you want. I’ll be right here.”

You found solace in Ingrid’s company; having her here meant you could relax and focus on something else other than the noise in your head. Your thoughts were having a whale of a time up there, you couldn’t land on a single one as they were spiralling around too much to pick one out. It was exactly that - just noise. But then you’d avert your eyes slightly to the left and land on a certain dark-haired woman, and everything went silent. Knowing that Alexia and Mapi were just a few metres away behind the door might have made you panic, but you trusted them both and knew that they were equally concerned about you as Ingrid was. As Alexia had told you since one of the first times you spoke to her, she wanted to be a person you felt comfortable with to go to about any problems, and you did trust her. Mapi too, though she came as an unspoken package deal with Ingrid, whether she liked that or not.

“I’m sorry.” You mumbled, surprising yourself as much as you did Ingrid. She frowned at you, wondering why of all things you could say after the difficult time you’d had in the last day, you chose to apologise.

“Sorry about what? You don’t need to apologise for anything, elskling.” She told you, finally moving her dead arm to hold one of your hands and squeeze it comfortingly.

“Yesterday. The match. Me.” Talking was still hard, but the guilt was monumental.

“The result wasn’t your fault. That’s just how football is sometimes, but we didn’t lose and we still have more group stage games to go. The whole team was off, it wasn’t your fault.” Ingrid reminded you, her eyes wide as she tried to get the message through to you.

“Yellow card.”

“You did get a yellow card, but we all saw the replay afterwards and you got the ball. The referee got it wrong. You also scored our only goal of the game, engel, don’t forget that.” She shuffled a little closer on her knees, placing another kiss to your forehead.

“Suppose so.” You grumbled a minute later, Ingrid smiling in amusement.

“You did so.” She commented, thumb still stroking along the skin of your cheekbone. “Did you have a bad meltdown last night?”

“Mhm.” You hummed dejectedly, overcome with shame and embarrassment at now admitting it to someone. The evidence of it was all around, you knew the trio in your house had seen it all, but there was something gut-wrenching about admitting it aloud.

“Okay. We’ll pick up the pieces and put you back together, don’t worry.” Ingrid stated resolutely, like there was no other option.

With the next thing you said, someone might have to come along and piece Ingrid back together.

“Why do they have to happen, Ingrid? I hate them so fucking much.”

All your vulnerabilities poured out in two short sentences. Twenty-six years later and the process of a meltdown never got any less demoralising.

“I know, I know.” She moved from her place on the floor and clambered onto the bed behind you, recognising that you had entered a head space where you’d feel comfortable with it now. You confirmed that for her by rolling onto your side, allowing her to shuffle up and hug you tightly back to her chest. “Hey, think of it this way. This is your first one since moving to Spain, that’s amazing! I’m so proud. You’ve handled everything so well, I bet younger you is so proud too.”

Progress wasn’t linear, and it didn’t have the same definition in this case as it did for the majority of the population. Progress meant learning about yourself, learning what harmed you and what you couldn’t deal with, so that you could come up with solutions. There wasn’t a way to grow comfortable with certain things, like restaurants for example, it was about realising what precautions had to be taken beforehand and what support you needed afterwards. Progress was being able to ask people for help, it was having the courage to say no to plans you wouldn’t be able to cope with, it was accepting that yes, you were different, but no, it didn’t make you any less worthy than the next person.

You had made progress, but not the textbook definition of it. Autism took everything about the allistic world and re-defined it for itself.

“Thank you.” You said, voice cracking a little as you did so, a slither of a smile on your face when Ingrid kissed the back of your neck. “Love you, Ingrid.”

The defender felt as if her heart had burst upon hearing those two words. But with the swell of joy that filled her chest, quickly came the crushing sense of regret from earlier.

“I love you too. I'm sorry for not being here last night. I could have helped, or just been with you, and I didn't. I'm sorry for that.”

Her apology tugged at your heart; you didn't blame her, not one bit. 99% of the time, there was no stopping these things, no matter what you tried or who you were with.

“It's okay. Thank you for being here now.”

Ingrid nestled in closer at that, and the strength of her hug was the exact kind of pressure needed for the remnants of the dark cloud that had hung over you for a while to finally drift away. The pair of you stayed that way for a while, both more than happy to relish in the peace that had settled, but when there are two antsy women only a few feet behind the door, a disruption is inevitable.

“Can they come in? They’re both worried and will just want to see you're okay.” Ingrid asked quietly after one of them had knocked on the door. You nodded sheepishly, so Ingrid called them in.

“How are things going in here?” Mapi asked carefully, smiling at her girlfriend who gave her a reassuring nod.

“Good. We’re doing okay now.” Ingrid answered honestly, feeling just as relieved as the two Spaniards at the door looked.

“You guys can come in instead of hanging around by the door.” You told them, Ingrid stifling her laughter behind you.

“You two look cosy. Let me join, I'm jealous.” Mapi grinned, dramatically diving onto the bed and sighing contently as she threw an arm around Ingrid's waist.

Alexia was still lingering awkwardly at the door as three of you lay in one double bed, thinking that she didn't want to intrude on a friendship that had been around far longer than she'd known you. But, as you had done for months now, you continued to surprise her.

“Come lay here, Ale.” You waved her over and pointed for her to lay beside the bed on the ground.

Ale. Sure, everybody called her that, but today was the first time you called her that.

She came over in a heartbeat, probably too eager, but she immediately got down and laid on her back beside you. You looked down at her with a shy smile, red eyes and all, and she returned it instantly with pink cheeks.

“Have you eaten yet?” She whispered, looking at the untouched tray of goods next to her. As you shook your head, she reached to grab the paper bag of bakery-bought cookies she had found in your kitchen and opened them, before taking one out and breaking a bit off to give to you. “Cookies for breakfast.”

“Cookies for breakfast.” You gladly took it and ate it, all whilst smiling down at the woman on the floor.

Alexia Putellas, your captain, a World Cup winner, voted best player in the world numerous times, laying on the floor of your apartment just for you. Playing for this team, in this city, was still such a perplexing situation, though fortunately for all the right reasons.

The rest of the day was spent with Mapi and Ingrid as you had told Alexia to go to her family dinner she had initially cancelled. She was reluctant to do so, but eventually she agreed and you were left with Ingrid and her hyperactive counterpart. They kept you distracted enough throughout the day, going for a walk with you, watching a movie with you, even inviting you back to their apartment for dinner where you spent the majority of the time with Bagheera on your lap. Mapi made digs at the fact her cat loved you more than her, and you just sat there with a grin on your face, knowing it was true and revelling in it.

At the end of the night, you insisted on going back to your own flat after telling the pair of them you were tired of third-wheeling. With tight hugs from them both and one last gloat from you as Bagheera followed you to the door, you left them and made the very short journey back home. You had unknowingly left your phone there, and as you checked it for the first time in a couple hours, there was a surprise waiting for you on it.

Alexia: Would you like to get breakfast with me tomorrow?

Alexia: I can meet you at your apartment and we can walk somewhere of your choice

Alexia: But if you don't want to, that’s okay!

Her nervousness radiated through the phone with her slight spam of texts, and you couldn’t help but smile at how endearing it was. As if you could ever say no to that. Even if it was a last minute change of plan, all you were going to do tomorrow was maybe go on a run or go to the gym before staying home all day. This was a welcome surprise.

Sticking true to her word, she showed up at 9am on the dot. Anyone would assume it was the middle of winter in Norway with the way she was dressed, when it was just a rainy day in Barcelona. But she was there, a shy smile on her face that was very uncharacteristic for her as she handed you one of the two umbrellas she had in her hands.

“I do have my own umbrella here, Ale.” You teased her, though you took it and closed the door behind you. When you turned back, there was a red shade to her cheeks.

“Well, good morning to you too.” She grumbled, trying to act grumpy but the smile on her face forced its way through sooner than she wanted. As soon as it did, she drew you in for one of those hugs that you may or may not think about more often than you'd admit.

You both easily fell into step after that, heading towards a quiet little cafe you had frequented since your first week in Barcelona. It was a short walk from your apartment, but that didn’t stop the grumbled complaints from Alexia about the weather the whole way, though by the time you arrived you were quite sure she was doing it just to hear you laugh. Again, it surprised you just how naturally conversation flowed between you both. There was no awkwardness, no nerves, just unfiltered joy spilling from the both of you. It hit you then. You were just being yourself around her. And that’s why it felt so good.

There was no reason to mask around Alexia; you felt safe around her. You could do or say anything, and most likely she would just smile right back at you. She’d seen most versions of you by now, and yet here she still was, inviting you out for breakfast even if it did rain on her parade. She had seen you at your happiest in your first game for the team when she came sprinting over, leading the charge for her teammates to celebrate with you. She saw you yesterday morning after a night of horror, eyes red and puffy, wrapped up unmoving in bed, and she lay on the floor beside you still with a smile on her face. You had already let her in more than some of the people you were closest with back in Germany and her opinion never faltered.

After finding a table, beside the window of course, Alexia went off to order for the pair of you. Though, when she came back, there was a surprise on your plate.

“Why’d you get me this?” You asked shyly.

“Because it is your… your comfort food, right? I thought you would like it.” She shrugged the gesture off, sitting down across from you like it was nothing. Like it didn’t mean everything to you. It wasn’t the cookie itself that had your heart racing, it was the thought behind it that topped your heart back up with the love it needed after the past thirty-six hours.

“They are, but you didn’t have to do this for me. Thank you.” You said, hiding your smile by taking a drink of the hot cocoa you had chosen.

“Eh, it’s nothing. Have you ever tried this?” She gestured to her choice of meal, one of her favourites. “Pa amb tomàquet.”

“I don’t like tomatoes.”

“Oh no, cariño.” Alexia muttered after a few quiet moments, shaking her head and dropping her cutlery. “No, no, no.”

“What?” You said in amusement, entertained by her dramatics.

“You just stamped on my culture. You broke my heart.”

“I broke your heart, did I?” You said with a smirk. “You broke my heart when you complained about the rain the whole way here.”

“How can anyone like rain? It is sad and boring.” She argued in mock outrage, though of course she can’t last a second around you without smiling.

“The rain reminds me of home.” You revealed sheepishly. Alexia’s shoulders dropped and her face softened instantly. “Both Norway and Germany, actually.”

“No, I understand. I get it. I never thought about it like that but I understand.” She told you, watching as you nodded and looked out the window. “Do you get homesick?”

“Sometimes.” You admitted in a whisper a minute later, only to clear your throat and turn your attention back to your food and start eating.

“You… you never speak Norwegian with Ingrid.” She stated, though it was clearly more of a question.

“Uh, nope. I find it hard to learn new languages, so when I learnt English and moved to Germany, it was like it became my first language. I can speak Norwegian still, obviously, and I would love to learn Spanish and Catalan but it’s just really tiring switching between languages. Mentally tiring, that is. I never learnt German other than a few basic phrases. It’s just too much to process if that makes sense.”

You stumbled your way through an explanation of a minor secret you’d been a little shameful of for a while now. It was common courtesy to learn and understand the language of a new country, as well as immersing yourself in that and the culture, but it was something you had always struggled with. Admitting that to someone like Alexia was slightly terrifying.

“That’s okay, a lot of people here speak English so you don’t need to worry about learning the languages. But if you ever want some lessons, if or when you are ready, I could help. Or Aitana, or Jana, or someone else.”

It was suggestions like that, easy solutions that were offered with no second thought, that made Alexia so endearing.

There was one thought that was ever-present in the back of your mind though, it had been for a while, but the meltdown brought it on even stronger. Once the pair of you had finished your meals and were merely just enjoying each other’s company, it came out before you could stop it.

“Do you think I’m doing well here?”

Alexia paused for a moment to think carefully, before placing her cup down and smiling over at you.

“I do. You want to know what I think?” You nodded with no hesitation. “I remember watching you play against us in the Champion’s League last year, you really caused us a lot of problems. And then I heard the coaches say they were thinking of signing you, and I really wanted you to come because I know you would flourish here. Our play style suits you well, and you are an amazing striker. Your positioning, your creativity, awareness, you are a well-rounded attacker. And outside of the pitch, well… the team is much better off with you here.”

“What do you mean?” You said, almost in a whisper.

“You are just a happy person. The happiest person in the changing room. Any one of us could be having a bad day, but then you are there with your smile and your cheeriness and it really lifts us all up.”

Dumb-founded. That's all you felt in that moment.

Perhaps your face may not show that considering there was a thoughtful frown on your face as you processed the words nobody had ever said to you before, but then the slight shock wore off and… nope, still dumb-founded.

“Really?” You had to double check, because is that honestly what other people thought of you?

“Yes. It's the truth. Ingrid said she has never seen you bond like this with a team before. Believe me when I say you fit in, everybody loves you. We can't imagine what it's like to not have you now.”

Well. You just might have to start believing that. What choice were you left with otherwise?

—

Something snapped inside of you after that day. A new problem had formed, one you couldn’t have expected at all. Had you dealt with a similar situation in the past? Yes. But those were much more convenient occasions. This one couldn’t be more inconvenient if you tried.

You couldn’t talk to Mapi about it, or Ingrid, or Alexia. Definitely not Alexia.

It’s just a crush. You could get over a crush.

Of course you fall for the first person who showed you a bit of humanity. What’s not to like about Alexia?

She lets you ramble to her when you want to, she sits in silence with you when you need it. During briefings at training, she’ll hand over a pack of chewing gum as she knows it helps you to concentrate or, even in some situations outside of training, she takes her rings off and lets you wear them so you can fidget with them instead of your bad habits of skin picking. She’s seen you very close to your worst, and she’s seen you at your best. She gives you her sunglasses whenever a place is too bright, not just because of the sun as it can be any kind of light, and she lets you squeeze her hand to death during take-offs and landings on planes whilst travelling for away games.

Maybe, maybe, it was a tad more than a crush. It’s not your fault though! She chose to act this way, she had inserted herself right into your life the moment she met you, so… what else were you supposed to do?

Oh boy.

“Frido! I need your help!” You said in an urgent, hushed whisper. The unsuspecting Swede was just walking to her car after training when you called her name from the window of your own vehicle.

“Everything okay?” She checked with a concerned scowl to her eyebrows, coming over in an instant.

“Yes! Well, no, but yes, but- just get in the car please.”

With a humoured smile, Frido headed around to the passenger side and hopped in, turning to you with an open expression.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You seem a bit agitated.” She probed once more. Being long-time friends with Ingrid meant you had obviously come to know Frido well too, and she was part of the group you found yourself in at Barcelona, with Aitana and Esmee also. Esmee was the person you sat with on the coach most of the time, you both gave each other the calmness needed after a game… but that was when you weren't with Alexia, of course.

“Yes, I am just screwed, Frido. So screwed.” You groaned, clutching the steering wheel tightly and dropping your forehead to rest on it.

“Why?”

“I shouldn’t tell anyone but it’s going to explode out of me if I don't talk about it soon. And I can’t tell Ingrid or Mapi, so here we are.” Then you slumped back against your chair, a frustrated sigh leaving you as you crossed your arms.

“You can tell me anything, they don’t have to know. Getting it off your chest will help.” Frido smiled reassuringly at you.

It probably wasn’t a good idea to tell anyone about it. Having someone else know made it a reality, for you right now it was just a thought, a daydream. But telling Frido would turn this stupid delusion into an actual, real problem rather than something you thought about at night. And during the day. Actually, most of the t- it doesn't matter.

“You must never tell a soul, Frido.” You glared at her in warning, though you trusted her with your life. “And you can't make fun of me or laugh either. It's not funny.”

“Never, snuppa. I promise.” She swore.

Another sigh as your eyes flitted around anxiously, moving from the car beside you, to the sky, to the blonde waiting patiently for you to find the words you need. Maybe the world will be thrown upside down when you tell her, but it's either that or an implosion, so.

“I like Alexia. Really like her. And it's going to ruin my life.”

It did not feel better saying it out loud.

“Why wou-”

“Because she is the captain! She’s the leader, everyone looks up to her, she's just being a human and now I have a crush on her! That's not fair on her! All she’s doing is just being nice to me, like everyone else on the team, and my stupid brain had to choose her. Of all people in the world, her! It's going to mess everything up, I've just found my place and I'm finally feeling somewhat comfortable here and then this happens and I just- I hate it!”

Your words shocked yourself, even. Apparently it was a much bigger problem than you initially thought. In reality, you should have picked up on that, relationships historically haven't gone well for you.

Everybody says they don't care that you're autistic until your disability actually debilitates you. One glimpse of it and they’re gone. Then the world has the audacity to label you as someone who is ‘high-functioning’ with ‘low support needs’ just because you can get up in the morning and go to work. That doesn't mean you struggle any less, you’re not ‘mildly autistic’, those struggles are simply just internalised, therefore other people experience your autism mildly. If anything, they should be thanking you. Thanking you for making their life easier by making your own a million times harder.

Should Alexia ever see you during one of your meltdowns, she’d probably run for the hills. Quit her career, change her name, and flee to another country. That’s what most people did.

“Slow down, slow down. Come back to me, you are spiralling.” There were soft hands holding your own now, stopping you from palming them roughly against your arms, something you did in anxious moments like now. Movement helped you process things, it was no wonder you became a footballer.

“I don’t know what to do, Frido, it will ruin everythi-”

“Hey, be quiet for a moment.” She urged gently, and you turned to look at her with panic in your eyes. “This won’t ruin everything, that is just your anxiety talking. You’re allowed to have a crush on someone, skatt, you’re only human. It’s natural.”

“Yes, but it’s not the fact I have a crush, it’s who the crush is.”

“I know.” She paused for a second, figuring out the best way to help you around this. “When you talk to me, who do you see? Do you see Frido, your friend? Or do you see Fridolina Rolfö, the footballer?”

“I see Frido, my friend.” You answered skeptically.

“When you’re with Alexia, do you see her as Ale, your friend? Or do you see Alexia Putellas, your captain?”

“She’s just Ale, but I don’t-”

“If you see Alexia like that normally, why are you picturing her differently in this case? As if she’s bigger than you and… unobtainable?”

Viewing it from another perspective definitely gave you some clarity.

…But, after all, she is your captain?

“I don’t want to mess this opportunity up though. I was really worried I wouldn’t like it here, but now I do and I actually already love it more than Germany, but if I ever acted upon my feelings it could fuck it all up. I don’t know if I could handle that.” You said insecurely, chewing on your lower lip to keep the emotions at bay.

When Frido had been silent for too long, you turned to look at her, only to find she was doing the same thing. As if she was deep in thought. Before you could coax whatever was clearly on the tip of her tongue out of her though, she was speaking.

“I know something that I shouldn’t. I’m going to tell you anyway because I think it will make you feel a lot better.” She began with a shy, yet excited expression to her features.

“What is it?” You prompted.

“Last week, in Seville. I was walking to my hotel room and… Mapi and Ale were ahead of me in the corridor. I don’t think they knew I was there, and I heard them having a conversation just like ours.”

Oh. Oh.

“How sure are you?” Your eyes searched her face, looking for even just an ounce of hesitation that would throw all this out the window for you. But it wasn’t there.

“I’m very sure, snuppa, I heard basically every word.” She said with an almost proud smile. “I don’t think you have to worry about anything. Sounds like Alexia feels the same as you do. And even if I hadn’t overheard that, it’s clear to a lot of us that Alexia felt that way anyway. Think of how much time she has spent with you since you joined. She doesn’t spend that much time with anyone on the team, to be honest.”

That caught your attention. Now that Frido mentions it, Alexia has spent a lot of time with you. There was that morning she took you out for breakfast, something you hadn't ever expected but after it, you wished it would happen every morning. She always chooses to sit next to you at any given point, whether that be in briefings or whilst travelling, as well as opting to partner up with you in training whenever the opportunity arises. She even took time out of her own evening to cook dinner for you and bring it to you once when you told her you had ran out of your meal prep.

“I guess.” You mumbled with a frown.

“She’s just a girl after all. Like you.”

Once again, the world had decided to show you just how much your life can change with one single conversation.

—

Not that you acted upon anything, of course. Over a month passed by with things staying the same as they had been for a number of weeks before the revelation with Frido. Training, match, recovery day, repeat. Dinner at Ingrid and Mapi’s apartment every Thursday if the season schedule allowed it. Morning jogs on days-off, evenings spent basking in the golden glow of a Spanish sunset, some of the best you’d seen. There may have possibly been a few more breakfast outings with Alexia. And perhaps just one movie night. Or was it two?

Regardless, the one good thing about having the natural ability to mask all the inner turmoil you had was being able to hide your feelings when you were around Alexia. On the other hand, your trait of analysing every detail of your life became a bit too exhausting. You were overthinking all of your actions - every word you said, the way you said it, what your hands were doing, what someone might interpret from your body language, every little thing you did kept you up at night.

You definitely still liked her, that might… never go away. Those feelings only grew and weighed you down more and more, but you couldn’t distance yourself from her no matter how loud your mind screamed at you to do so. You liked her company, she ranked almost as high as Ingrid on your list of… list of what? People you liked? People you felt safe with? People you didn’t have to mask at all around? People you lov- too early.

There was just so much to think about, and so few solutions. There were literally two; you either tell her, or you pretend it never happened. What the hell were you meant to do with those options? Both were equally as terrifying. As if your fear of the future couldn’t get any deeper, you were now stood at a crossroads. Alexia could become the most important person in your life, or she could just become another person you leave behind in this free-for-all career. She could just slip into the past and become a distant memory.

Massive leaps of faith still weren’t your thing. The fear of the unknown still ran rampant through your veins, and though you’d become a little more relaxed about certain things over the years, this was absolutely not one of those exceptions. The prospect of it all was just too overwhelming. Truthfully, you really didn’t think you could do this.

However, things all came to a head during the last training session of the year in December. Literally.

“Ale? Are you okay?” You asked in a strangled groan, one of your hands coming up to your head as you squinted through one eye to look for the woman you’d just clashed with.

“Oye, sit down. Ale is fine, you both hit heads though so you need to be checked for a concussion. Lay down.” Mapi demanded just as you got back up onto your knees.

At that moment, you couldn’t have cared less about whether you had a concussion or not, all you cared for was that Alexia was okay. She was, maybe a black eye and a subsequent bruise to her ego, but she was fine. You had taken the brunt of it, straight to the temple.

You followed Mapi’s instruction and layed back down, your head already starting to throb quite a bit. Before you knew it, you were surrounded by some of the medical staff as they checked you over. Once they decided you were well enough to sit up, they urged you to do so as one of them came to cradle your neck to keep it steady. A bright light was flashed into your eyes, making you flinch, but they decided then that if you did have a concussion, it wasn’t too bad. The decision was made to take both you and Alexia inside as the rest of training went on, so the pair of you walked gingerly to the physio room.

“You okay?” Alexia murmured quietly as you both trailed behind the physios a little. You ignored the way your heart fluttered when her hand found your forearm briefly, and instead blamed it on your head injury (though it may not be physically possible for those occurrences to be linked.)

“Mhm. Are you? I’m sorry that happened.” You replied. The collision was a bit hazy for you, you couldn’t exactly remember what had happened so if you were at fault, you had to make sure she knew it wasn’t purposeful. She had to know.

“No, no apologies, it’s just football. Happens all the time.” She reassured you, smiling comfortingly down at you as she held the door open for you.

In the room, the team ushered you both onto separate beds, forcing ice packs into your hands as they carried out more cautionary checks. And to add to the guilt you felt, they decided to rule you both out of the game tomorrow as a precaution. Your stomach dropped, dreading Alexia’s reaction. Everyone knew about her mentality, a missed game was a missed opportunity. You weren’t quite sure you could ever look her in the eye again.

The second the physios said you both could leave, you hopped off the bench and went to make a run for it. The sooner you could get home, the better. If you avoided the conversation, you could avoid the whole situation, and hide until the Winter break ended.

“Cariño, wait!” Alexia called out, managing to gently stop you by your wrist before you could flee. You didn’t put up much of a fight, you just sighed and lowered your head. Alexia gestured for the rest of the staff to leave the room for the time being, and that only made matters worse. Not only was she going to trap you in a conversation, there weren’t even any witnesses. “I just want to talk about something. Could you sit down?”

You had no choice but to entertain her.

Reluctantly, you sat back down on the physio bench you were on a moment ago, and copied Alexia’s position. Perched on the edge, legs hanging off the side, except your hands gripped the fabric of it quite a bit tighter.

“Sorry.” You whispered with a chagrined look to your face, eyes trained on the swing of your legs.

“What? Why?” Alexia asked. The confusion in her voice led you to look up at her with your own questioning glance.

“For getting us ruled out. We can’t play tomorrow now.” You told her, your eyes again looking anywhere in the room but at her. Then again, that always happened, no matter the occasion.

“I told you that wasn’t your fault, you really don’t need to apologise. I’m not mad at you, so you don’t need to feel guilty or anything. We’re both okay, it’s just for our safety.” Alexia reminded softly, but with the head space you were in, you couldn’t believe her words just yet.

“What about the game though?” You uttered in a way akin to that of a down-trodden child, and Alexia could only smile in return at it.

“The team will handle it, they’ll be fine. You don’t have to worry about anything, it’s all out of your control. Chin up.” Alexia said with a coy grin.

She laughed freely when you physically tilted your head up and squeezed your eyes shut to give a cheesy smile, and the sound of it instantly calmed most of your worries.

“Is that all you wanted to talk about?”

“Um, no, actually. There’s another thing.” She scratched the back of her neck nervously as she spoke, and just like that your anxiety came rushing back. “I just, I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable in any way, so please tell me if I am because that’s not what I wan-”

Was she about to say it?

“Say it, Ale. Just say it.” You interrupted, because if she was going to say it, you needed it right now. You couldn’t wait a second longer.

“Right. Well…” There was a bright redness to her cheeks, not just from the head-to-head a while ago. “I, um, I… I like you. Really like you, actually. As in, I want to go on a date with you.”

She actually said it.

“In a romantic way?” Your deadpan tone didn’t exactly help Alexia’s nerves in that moment.

“Uh, I’m not sure there’s any other kind of date, cariño, so yes, in a romantic way.” She laughed nervously. You were quiet for a few moments as you inwardly controlled your emotions so that you didn’t totally freak out in front of the woman who had just asked you on a date.

You had to play it cool, right? That’s what everyone always said.

“Sure. When?”

It was comical, really. You’d waited this long for something to finally happen between you both, and now it seemed you couldn’t care any less. If Alexia could see into your brain right now though, it would be total chaos. Like a scene straight out of Inside Out.

“I guess now that we can’t play tomorrow and we are the only ones ruled out, we could go to the game together?”

That was… actually a much better idea than you thought. Normally, people go on dates to the cinema or to restaurants or whatever other hellish activity neurotypicals chose to do. But a football game was common ground, something that the pair of you could talk about forever, and it was an environment that you were familiar with. That could absolutely work. A dream, actually.

Still, you had to play it cool.

“But I’m already going to the game. And I would have to sit with you anyway. And all you would focus on is the game, it wouldn’t be much of a date.” You were teasing her at this point, whilst also worrying that perhaps you had taken it too far again, but Alexia understood you by now. She’d caught on, and this was her favourite version of you she had seen so far.

“Fine, it doesn’t have to be a date then! You could have just said no instead of breaking my heart!” She argued theatrically, a wave of euphoria rushing through her when you threw your head back and laughed. “How about we go out for food after, that can be our date? We can go to one of the markets and get dinner from a food truck and go on a walk, instead of a restaurant. Does that sound like a better date?”

“Yeah, but I was going to say yes to the football game anyway.” You shrugged a shoulder nonchalantly, a hint of a smirk on your face as you stood up to put your ice pack away. Alexia watched you do so with a huge smile on her face at your antics. You turned back to her, a hand on your hip where you stood not too far away from her now. “Dinner still sounds good though.”

“You are so annoying.” Alexia hopped down off of the bench and wandered over to you with a shake of her head, throwing her own ice pack down next to yours. “You know that?”

“It’s a love language. Get used to it.”

The midfielder chuckled under her breath. Secretly, she hoped she was able to get used to it.

“Wait, what do I have to wear tomorrow?” Your eyes suddenly went wide in panic, staring up at Alexia like she held all the answers in the world.

“Well, it is just a football game and a walk, so whatever you are comfy in. Why?”

“Because it’s a date, I don’t know what you expect me to wear.” You fretted. It had been a long time since your last date. And this was quite possibly the most important one so far.

“I have no expectations, cariño, just make sure you’re warm and comfortable.” Alexia brushed it off like it was nothing, a notion that silenced all those doubts once again. She had a real habit of doing that.

“Okay.” You nodded.

You realised your close proximity then, noticing you were both quite close. There was one thing that came to mind, but it was surely too early for that. No matter how much you wanted it. One step at a time. Instead, you shyly held your arms out and looked up at her.

She immediately knew what you were after, and who was she to deny you of that. You melted into her embrace the second she invited you in, finally being able to relish in the comfort her hugs brought without overthinking it.

“You are quite oblivious, you know?” Alexia stated with a smirk to break the silence.

“Shut up, you’re ruining it.”

—

You couldn’t sleep that night, you were way too excited for your date. You were like a giddy kid at Christmas, the smile didn’t leave your face for more than a second. Ingrid came around that night with the intention of checking up on you, but she never could have predicted what information she was walking back to her apartment with. When she found out, she thought she was excited, but Mapi, well, she was on a whole other level. Long story short, Bagheera didn’t surface from under the sofa until the Spaniard had long gone to bed.

The game kicked off at 2pm, meaning from the second you woke up at 7am sharp, you had way too much energy. Nervous energy. But there was one thing you noticed immediately. You didn’t feel scared, or anxious, or like you wanted to totally avoid the whole situation altogether. You were excited. You woke up feeling like a normal girl going on a date with someone they liked.

It was new. Refreshing. You felt light, you can’t remember the last time you felt that way about something that would normally freak you the hell out. Spending time with Alexia didn’t feel like a chore, the way it did sometimes with anyone in your life. Rather than draining your social battery, it stayed at the same level with her. If you were feeling especially burnt out one day, it didn’t seem so sickening to have Alexia’s company there like it was with the thought of anyone else. Your mind was peacefully empty when with her, unlike the fast-paced monologue that ran pretty much all hours of the day, even when you were asleep.

For once in your life, you were going to be optimistic. Because the woman you were meeting had never given you any reason to be otherwise.

So when she knocked on your apartment door, opting out of firing a text your way to say she had arrived, the surprise of not only her presence but the bouquet in her arms was met with a bright smile from yourself. You immediately took them from her and bounded towards the kitchen area to tuck them safely into a vase. Alexia gazed at you the whole time, feeling her own sense of disbelief at the situation she had found herself in. Never could she have imagined falling for you like she had when she met you for the first time six months ago, but she was happier than ever because of it.

There was a beaming smile of her own on her face, and her eyes crinkled with unfiltered joy when you leaned up to kiss her cheek quickly, before rushing around the flat to get everything you needed. Sunglasses, your coat to go over the matching jumper and joggers you were wearing (Alexia did tell you to dress comfortably, after all), and a cap for good measure. Between you both, there was a distinct difference between the amount of clothing layers, something that made you laugh.

“What are you laughing at?” Alexia grumbled, watching you adjust your hair in the mirror after putting your hat on, huffing when it wasn’t agreeing with you.

“You look like you’re dressed for a Norwegian winter. It’s ten degrees.”

“That is cold for me, cariño.” She chuckled, before moving to stand between you and the mirror, and helping you to sort your hair how you wanted it. You blushed and lowered your hands, looking up at her with a shy smile as she worked. “There. You look cute. Cosy.”

“Thank you.” You hummed, cheeks aching from the intensity of your smile when Alexia took hold of your hand and gave it a light squeeze. “You look… warm.”

“Enough with your teasing, let’s go.” Alexia tutted, though she kept your hand in hers as the pair of you left your apartment. It wasn’t until you got to the car that you both reluctantly let go, shooting each other a bashful look before getting into Alexia’s car.

When you arrived at the stadium, both of you spent some time with the team in the locker room, and Alexia addressed them all quickly before you left to find your seats. You had full faith in the team, it was luckily just a league game that most of the younger members of the team would be playing anyway. To be honest, you were quite thankful to not be playing, because it had given way for something better instead.

The majority of the game was spent by both of you talking endlessly about football, both tactical discussions about the game and personal stories for you both. For Alexia, she spoke about how she came to love it so much and how it took her family’s relationship and togetherness to a whole new level. For you, you told her how playing football was the only job you could see yourself succeeding in. The system was routine-based, your work attire was a jersey and shorts, and you were indulging in your special interest everyday of the week. It was an autistic’s person dream to be able to do that, something you were grateful for every time you stepped onto a football pitch. Any other work environment, and you might not have survived.

Alexia hung onto every word you said, just as you did for her. Learning more about each other was something you both took great interest in, because every detail about your past was how you had become the people you were today. Maybe it was too early to class it as such, but falling in love was a phenomenon that people took for granted nowadays. It’s rare, it’s special, and it’s beautiful. Two people, from entirely different backgrounds, leading unique lives with respective struggles and wins the other hadn’t experienced, only to go on and share every high and low together. Yeah, pretty special in your book.

With you both being in view of the stadium’s crowd, you were mindful of the watchful eyes around. There was one exception though; during the later stages of the game, the other team had quite a fierce counter attack, something that had both you and Alexia on the edges of your seat. Though, as they neared the goal, the match was the last thing on your mind when Alexia’s hand landed on your knee in anxious anticipation. That hand didn’t move, even when Cata saved the shot with ease. Instead, she just settled back into her seat and turned to you with a deep breath out, the tension leaving her. Then she noticed what she’d done, but before she could retract it, you simply gazed up at her and put your hand on top of hers.

It remained that way until the whistle blew a few minutes later, when you stood up to make your way down to the rest of the team. You got onto the pitch, Alexia and yourself splitting ways to go and talk to your other teammates. Two familiar faces came bounding over to you and before they even spoke, you could tell what they were going to say just by the smiles tugging at their lips.

“How’s it going?” Mapi asked, poking you in the ribs.

“It’s not gone anywhere yet, we were more focused on the game. But it’s been nice, really nice. It doesn’t feel much different to the other times we’ve hung out, is that good or bad?” You replied with a nervous chuckle, and you got your answer in the form of an excited squeal from Ingrid.

“That’s a good thing! That’s what it was like on our first date, right María?” Mapi nodded enthusiastically, giving you a double thumbs up for extra emphasis. “See! I’m sure you’re doing great, skatt, and I am so happy for you.”

“Me too, preciosa, so happy. Think of the double dates!” Mapi shook your arm vigorously at that, the three of you laughing.

“Let me get through the first one, then I’ll think about it.” That sobered the pair of them up as they nodded in a calmer manner, before they both surged forward to wrap you up in a hug.

“Oh- she’s coming, incoming.” Mapi whispered, pulling away and spinning you around.

“Shall we go, cariño? It might be busy there, so the sooner the better.”

Just like that, you were being whisked away back into Alexia’s car. She drove to the market, which was decorated for the festive seasons, something you gasped at in awe the second you saw it. Alexia fought off a smile at your reaction which she found much more endearing than she thought she would, and she instantly knew it was a good idea to bring you here. Though you were flying back to Norway in a few days’ time for Christmas back at home, she had a feeling you were a bit more homesick than you were letting on, considering the vast difference in the season between Spain and Norway. Her plan to bring you here, not only for a date, but to cheer you up a bit, was already proving to work.

For a couple hours, you went from stall to stall with a childlike wonder, dragging Alexia along behind you with a tight grip on her hand that you said was just because of the busyness of the area, but both of you revelled in it secretly. That became the truth when you were walking away from the market, slowly heading in the direction of Alexia’s car, until she took you in another direction. Turns out, she was leading you to a beautiful walled garden you had no idea even existed, but the second you saw it you fell in love. Even if it may not have been as stunning as it usually was in the summer, it was still more than enough to capture your attention.

“This is amazing, Ale, how did you know this was here?” You wondered, head on a swivel looking at each tiny detail, as if there wasn’t enough time in the world to admire its beauty.

One day, in the future, Alexia will reveal that that’s how she feels about you. There are layers to you, and she fears she won’t have enough time in her life to uncover and explore each one. You hold beauty in your physical features, that was the first thing she noticed about you, but it’s the grace of your heart and how you proudly wear it on your sleeve that she adores the most. It's the sparkle in your eyes when you ramble about the things you love most, the unabashed care you treat everyone with, your humour that constantly keeps her on her toes, the purity of your soul and how you have enough unconditional love to give to nearly every being on the planet. There’s plenty to love about you, but that still doesn’t feel like enough for her.

“I have lived here for most of my life, preciosa, I know Barcelona like the back of my hand.” She said, and maybe if you weren’t so oblivious, you might have seen the adoration present in her gaze.

“So you’re saying you know more places like this? And you’ve kept them a secret all this time?”

“Yes, I will show you them all, don’t worry.” She chuckled, slowly walking over to where you were stuck staring at an abundance of pansies in one area of the garden. “Those are Alba’s favourite.”

“This whole place is my favourite. I love it, thank you for taking me here.” You turned your attention from the flowers and back up to Alexia, who didn’t seem to take any interest in her surroundings. She was just smiling down at you. “What are you smiling at?”

“Hmm?”

“You’re just standing there, smiling. You haven't even looked around yet. What are you smiling like that for?” You asked in utter confusion. She was genuinely just stood there, perfectly still, seemingly lost in her thoughts, with a soft smile on her face that’s directed solely at you. Instead of answering, she laughs, to your annoyance.

“I’m just happy, cariño. Happy to be here with you, on a date.” She answered, like it was the simplest thing in the world.

“Oh. Okay.” You said, hoping the dim lighting from the street lamp wasn’t enough for Alexia to see the blush on your cheeks. “I’m really happy too. I can’t believe you like me.”

You didn’t really mean to say that, but the words tumbled out of you regardless.

“Why do you say that?” Alexia questioned with a frown, deftly taking hold of your hands.

“I don’t know.” You mumbled, looking down as your feet fidgeted on the spot, kicking a stone away from underneath you. “I can be a lot, I guess.”

“Well, luckily for you, I have seen your ‘a lot’ and it’s enough for me. You don’t have to worry about that, I promise.” Alexia replied, earnesty clear in her voice. She leaned forward then, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead. “Why do you put yourself down like that?”

“Because I want to be your girlfriend, but I want you to know what you’re getting into.” You told her, taking a slight step back.

“Loving another human, that’s all I’m getting into.” She took a cautious step closer. “That little voice is taking over, cariño, take a breath with me and know that I’m not going anywhere.”

Trying to calm down is quite hard when there’s a beautiful woman in front of you being so kind that she makes your head spin. Or when she’s giving the softest forehead kisses in all of mankind and holding your hands with a delicateness you’ve never experienced. She’s not just holding your hands right now, she’s got your heart in the palm of her hands.

“I don’t need anyone to take care of me.” You blurted out, sharply stepping back from her again.

“I know. You are the strongest person I’ve met, and you are more than capable of taking care of yourself. But who’s to say you can’t have someone by your side anyway?” She smiled like it was nothing. As if her words weren’t everything you’d ever wanted to hear. “Are you scared of me leaving?”

“Yes.” You whispered quietly, swallowing the lump in your throat and growing the confidence to look back up into her eyes.

“I’ve learnt a lot about you these past few months. Not a thing I now know has deterred me from you. I don’t think anything could. All I ask is that you take a chance and let me show you how much I adore and admire you. The feelings, the worries and doubts you have, they go both ways, cariño. I am worried that I might not be good enough for you and that I am not what you need. I am scared that I will get things wrong, and that I-”

You had heard enough, she’d proved her point.

You leant up on the balls of your feet, and kissed her. And she returned it almost instantly. Her hands dropped yours and landed on your hips, steadying you on your tip-toes. Yours wrapped around her neck, drawing her somehow closer. And just like everything had been so far with Alexia, it was easy. It was everything you dreamed of and more. Here, somewhere in Barcelona, not only had you made a life for yourself in just six months, you’d gained a new addition to it too.

Alexia had taught you a lot in the short time you had known her. But there was one thing that stood out to you; she had unknowingly taught you, just through her actions, that love is accommodation and consideration. It’s knowing what the other needs, and being there when they need it. It won’t be 50/50 everyday, in your case there will be times where it’s 90/10, and there will be occasions that are the same for Alexia. Your struggles don’t define you, and Alexia’s don’t define her. You’re worth it, just as much as she is. Just as much as everybody else.

Just because you’re stuck with a label for the rest of your life, a disability that beats you down when you want anything but that, those don’t mean that everything has to be hard. The truth is, when a genuine connection is found, things can be easy. They can be peaceful. With Alexia, you feel seen, as if you’re being mirrored back to yourself. Now, by loving the right person, you realise that other people shouldn’t always make you feel exhausted, they shouldn’t be the reason why you retreat back into yourself, and most importantly they shouldn't make you feel like you’re impossible to love.

Life will continue to try and break you down, there’s not a soul on earth that can entirely protect you from that, but having Alexia by your side, just like she said, can lessen the burden. After all, a sorrow shared is a sorrow halved, and joy shared is joy doubled. You have to live, you have to feel, you have to love, you have to take risks. Because if you hadn’t done that all along, where would you be now?

#woso x reader #fcb femeni #fcb femení #fcb femení x reader #barcelona femeni x reader #mapi león #ingrid engen #fridolina rolfö #alexia putellas x reader

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oneofstarkskids · 1 year ago

Text

i know you

pairings: bucky barnes x reader

genre: angst/fluff

summary: bucky doesn't want you to see him like this.

*not my gif*

he was sitting in the dimly lit training room. alone. his chest heaving as he tried to control his breathing.

you heard what happened and you'd been looking for him ever since.

his head snapped up as the door creaked open. there you were. for a split second he forgot his worries and his heart fluttered in his chest. but it was fleeting.

"leave," he said a bit harsher than he intended.

you only came closer without saying a word.

he kept his gaze trained on the tile floor in front of him. he didn't want you to see him like this. weak and fragile.

"just go. nobody else needs to get hurt," he whispered, but you heard it clearly enough.

"you're not going to hurt me, bucky," you assured him.

bucky glanced up to meet your eyes. he looked clammy and tired. like he was done holding on.

"how do you know?" he asked.

you knelt down to his level, "because i know you."

bucky shook his head and tried to avert his attention, but you cupped his face in your hands. "james. look at me."

those steel blue eyes bored into yours with so much anguish.

"don't you dare shut me out. i'm not afraid of you. there's nothing you could do to make me leave," you told him.

bucky squeezed his eyes closed and let out a strangled sob as he pulled you close.

"i'm sorry," he choked out softly.

you shook your head, refusing to let go of him. holding him together, "it's not your fault. it never was."

and you sat there with him. until he felt strong enough to get up and face everyone. until he believed the words that came out of your mouth.

you would've sat there all night if that's how long it took.

because you loved him.

#marvel #mcu #fanfiction #avengers #marvel fluff #marvel angst #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes angst #james buchanan barnes #captain america civil war

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fan-a-saurus-rex · 11 days ago

Note

Hii could I request something smutty (as much as ur comfortable writing) with the prompts 4 (sneaking out) and 13 (family vacation) with Joaquin? Thank you <3

Hope you enjoy what I wrote!

——————————————————————————

Sneaking Away

Plot: Sam and Sarah have planned a family vacation and Sam invites you and Torres to tag along. As the days go by the tension between you and Torres becomes too much and you sneak off to be alone.

Pairing: Joaquin Torres x Reader

Requested: Yes (make a request here)

Warnings: smut (oral [female receiving], unprotected sex w/ no pulling out [wrap it before you tap it friends!] ), swearing, a cute ending that’ll make you swoon!

Masterlist

You were surprised when Sam invited you to go on vacation with him, Sarah, and his nephews.

His excuse was that it was a family vacation and were considered family. Joaquin l, Isaiah and Bucky were going as well so you didn’t feel so guilty about “crashing” Sam’s trip with his sister and nephews.

Everyone had packed up and caught a flight to a resort in Cancun, Mexico. You would all be staying at the fanciest resort you’d ever seen. Everyone had a hotel room of their own on the same floor.

Your days were spent on the beach swimming in the water, soaking up the sun, and playing games with Sam’s nephews.

It was the fifth day of vacation when the vibes started to change.

You had been standing in the shallow tide collecting seashells when Joaquin snuck up behind you and picked you up, spinning you around.

You squealed until he put you back down in the sand.

“What was that for?” You asked giggling

“You looked lonely, thought I’d give you a hug” he said smiling at you, his dimples coming out.

The two of you had been low-key flirting the whole time you were here, and the tension between you was becoming harder to avoid. You’d find yourself wishing him sweet dreams before bed, then wishing you’d asked him to stay in your room that night. You’d catch him touching your knee or your thigh under the table at dinner.

You were afraid someone would take notice. You figured they hadn’t, and if they did they didn’t say anything.

You were about to say something flirty back to him when one of Sarah’s sons ran over excitedly “Auntie {y/n}! Look! We found a humongous shell for you” the excited pre-teen said handing you a beautiful twisted shell.

“Thanks buddy, it’s beautiful!” You said giving him a side hug before he ran back off to go body boarding with his brother and Bucky.

“Sam’s family has really gotten attached to you” Joaquin said smiling.

You couldn’t help but smile back “yeah, they’re great. Even if Sam doesn’t let me go on ‘dangerous’ missions with you guys”

“He just doesn’t want anything to happen to you. Neither do I” he said rubbing your shoulder softly.

You blushed “you do know I could kick both your asses and not break a sweat, right?”

He chuckled “yeah, yeah, ex widow. I know. You worked for Nick Fury and beat the crap out of the Spider-Man once”

You smirked “exactly” you said nudging him in the shoulder. You wanted so badly to get your hands on those biceps of his but you didn’t want to feel him up in front of everyone.

Suddenly you felt his hand on the small of your back. He lifted the hem of your shirt to draw shapes on your soft skin. You wiggled in your seat a bit, hoping nobody noticed.

Instead you decided to go for a swim instead, before heading back to your beach chair to read.

* * * * *

Later that night everyone ate dinner on the patio of one of the resort’s restaurants. After a few Hours the boys had become restless just sitting at the table so Sam suggested a family activity. The resort held movie nights on the beach each evening. Everyone would set up their beach chairs or their beach towels out on the sand and a movie would be played on a projector. Tonight they were showing classic Disney Movies like The Lion King and Aladdin.

You all went back up to your rooms to change into some more comfortable clothes then met back down at the beach where everyone else was gathering for the movie.

You laid your towel down, Joaquin settling down next to you. You smiled. Halfway through the movie you felt him scoot closer to you, your shoulders touching. You thought about laying your head down on his shoulder, but thought better of it.

“What are you doing?” You whispered to him with a slight smile.

“Nothing” he said, placing a soft, sneaky kiss to your cheek.

You blushed “stop, someone is gonna see” you said giggling softly.

He smirked a bit and let his hand fall back to the sand behind you. You took a deep breath and put your attention back on the movie, but minutes later his hand went back to caressing the skin on the small of your back. You tried to ignore him and nearly succeeded until he started nuzzling your neck, right under your ear.

“Torres?” You asked

“Hmm?”

“Why?” You asked, making sure nobody was watching you two.

“I’m feeling affectionate” he whispered on your ear.

“We’ll stop, someone is gonna see” you said, getting annoyed, but also not wanting him to stop.

“We could always sneak off” he whispered, before nibbling your ear.

You inhaled quickly “please?”

“Come on” he said getting up and reaching down to help you up.

“Everything okay?” You heard Sam ask.

“Yeah, {y/n} isn’t feeling well from the heat. I’m gonna help her get ready for bed and watch a movie in the room” Joaquin said

Sam nodded.

“Hope you feel better babes” Sarah said.

You nodded and walked with Joaquin back to the hotel.

* * * * *

You barely made it out of the elevator and to your room before Torres had his mouth on yours. You unlocked your door with the card and dragged him inside shutting the door behind you, only to have your back pressed up against it as Joaquin kissed you deeper.

“Finally alone” he breathed against your lips.

You smirked “you’ve been driving me crazy all week”

His lips crash against yours again and you kiss him hungrily before he pulls away “you’ve been teasing me in those bikinis”

“Oh yeah? Cause seeing you shirtless has been a total tease too” you say with a smirk as you push him off you and towards the bed.

“You like it when I don’t wear a shirt?” He asks smirking as you push him onto the bed, straddling his lap.

“Mhm” you say, pulling his t-shirt off before kissing him again, your hands roaming his bare chest.

He pulls away long enough to pull off your tank top, revealing your unpadded lace bra.

You wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him again, your tongue teasing his bottom lip. You hear a groan escape his mouth as your tongue wrestles with his, it gives you a shiver up your spine.

He tugged at the elastic on your cotton shorts and you move to let him tug them off. You pull off his basketball shorts before resuming your spot in his lap.

He kisses your neck with open mouth kisses and it drives you insane. You grind your hips against his and he starts to suck a sensitive spot on your neck.

“Mmm, Torres” you moans softly, leaning your head to the side to give him more access. Your hands reach up and run through his dark curls.

He kisses along your throat to the other side of your neck. You squeak a bit when he bites your shoulder as he kisses down your collarbone and in between your breasts before removing your bra. He looks up at you before taking one of your perked nipples in his mouth and sucking on the tender skin.

You let out another soft moan as you grind on him, craving friction, but loving the extra tension building up as he worships your body.

He releases your nipple with a pop before taking the other one on his mouth, this time sucking harder so it’ll leave a mark. He leaves several hickeys on your breasts before flipping you over, laying you down on the bed. He kissed down your chest and stomach to the elastic of your panties. He looked up at you, asking permission to take them off. You nod, your breath getting deeper with anticipation.

He pulls them off and tosses them to the side. He kisses down your hips to your inner thighs, nipping at the skin. You could feel his hot breath at your throbbing center before he licked a strip from your entrance to your clit.

“Oh!” You moan out as he started sucking on your sensitive bud. You arched your back and whined a bit when he stoped, but moaned out when his tongue entered you. “Fuck, Torres!”

He groaned against you as his tongue darted in and out slowly, driving you absolutely insane. You had no idea he was that good with his mouth and you weren’t disappointed.

Your moans got louder as you got closer and closer to your climax, but just before you could hit your high he pulled away, smirking.

“Fuck….Joaquin….why?” You groaned, annoyed that hadn’t let you finish.

“Not yet babygirl” he said moving up and kissing your lips again as he rubbed your sensitive bud.

You moaned against his lips “Torres….I want you so bad”

“Be patient babygirl” he whispers, fondling your breasts in his large hands as he kisses your jawline

Your breathing got deeper and you bucked your hips against his to get any kind of friction to relieve the ache.

“I’ve been patient all week Joaquin, I want you now!” You groan, almost growling.

He smirks “so needy, it’s hot as hell” he says pulling off his boxers, his extremely hard member springing out. If you hadn’t been so horny you would have sucked him off, but you wanted him in you so badly.

He lined up to your entrance and teased you with the tip. You were soaked and couldn’t wait for him to slide all the way in.

He continued to tease. Pushing in slowly, inch by inch, as he watched the desperate look on your face as you whimpered beneath him. He wasn’t doing it to be mean, he just liked watching how desperate you were for him.

He pulled out, causing a frustrated groan from you, then pushed all the way in, in one deep thrust.

“Oh fuck!” You moaned.

“Mm, so tight for me baby girl, damn” he groaned as he started to thrust slowly.

You could feel every inch of him, and he could feel every inch of you. It made you feel dizzy in the best way.

You ran your hands up and down his back as you lost yourself in the feeling of him. Eventually he picked up the pace and started thrusting deeper, hitting that spot that drove you crazy. “Oh fuck…Joaquin” you moaned out. “Don’t stop” you begged.

“I won’t babygirl, love making you feel like this” he groaned, hitting deep within you with every thrust.

Eventually he started to go faster, still bottoming out inside you.

“Shit….faster!” You moaned. He complied and started to go faster, feeling your fingers rake up and down his back gave him goosebumps.

You were both hanging on the edge of your climaxes, but the tension of inching there slowly only made it feel more intimate between you two. You’d waited long enough to for this private time together, you were going to make the best of it and make it last as long as you could.

You could feel the tell-tale signs that your climax was coming in quick. “Oh god, I’m so close!” You moaned as you felt his free hand turn your face to look at him.

“Look at me babygirl, I wanna see your pretty face when you cum” he cooed at you as he went faster, sending you over the edge.

“Fuck! Torres!” You moaned out loudly as your walls clenched around him and you released hard.

“Mm, baby I’m so close, want me to pull out?” He groaned as you felt him swell inside you.

“No, fill me up” you moaned.

Seconds later you could feel him releasing inside you, his loud moans sending chills down your spine “oh shit baby!”

He rode out both of your highs before collapsing next you to.

Once you caught your breath a little, you rolled over onto his chest, kissing him softly. He kissed back. These kisses were different than before, soft, sweet, and filled with affection.

You hummed and smiled softly.

“How do you feel baby?” He asked, smiling softly.

“Amazing” you cooed. “That was worth the wait”

He smiled as you lay on his chest, tracing patterns on your back. “So worth it” he whispered before kissing your forehead. “Let’s go get cleaned up” he said smiling.

You nodded and got up, following him into the bathroom, where there was a jacuzzi tub. He started to fill it with warm water. He put in some lavender scented bubbles, then helped you in, sliding in behind you.

You smiled and leaned into his chest, leaning your head on his shoulder as he helped you wash up. “Mmm, you’re perfect Torres” you said softly as you kissed his jawline.

“Not as perfect as you” he said kissing your cheek.

After you both relaxed in the warm bubbles for a while he helped you get out and dry off. You both got dressed again and laid down in bed, putting an old movie on the TV.

You didn’t really watch it, you were too distracted by each other. He had started playing with your hair and you found yourself pulling him for more kisses. Just sweet kisses, ones that gave you butterflies.

“Are you gonna stay with me tonight?” You asked

“Do you want me to stay tonight?” He asked, rubbing your cheek softly with his thumb.

“I’d like you to stay forever actually” you said smiling at him as you ran your hand up his chest.

He smiled and kissed you softly before leaning his forehead against yours. “Then I’ll stay” he said, cradling your face in his hands. “Tonight wasn’t about getting you into bed, well…it was, but it wasn’t just about that. I wanted to be close to you. Close in any way that I could get you. I’ve been slowly falling in love with you since we met. I just didn’t know how to tell you” he said

You smiled and kissed him softly one more time “me too” you whispered “and now I’m in so deep I don’t think I could ever let you go”

He smiled “go on a date with me? A real date. Tomorrow night after dinner with the family?”

You smiled “I’d love to”

He kissed you softly, probably for the hundredth time tonight, before pulling you back into his chest. You snuggled into him, nuzzling your nose into the crook of his neck.

At some point in the night you both dozed off, only to wake up to each the next morning. You hoped it would be like that every morning from now on.

#fanfiction #fanfic #smut #blurb #joaquin torres smut #joaquin torres #danny ramirez smut #danny ramirez

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etfrin · 1 year ago

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❝ꜱᴏᴜʟꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴄʀᴜꜱʜ❞ — chapter twenty-four | coriolanus snow

「ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ:」 NSFW | murder, getting away with murder, minor character death, pinv sex, unprotected sex (wrap it dumbfucks), riding, fingering (f. receiving), hints of edging, blood kink if you squint, creampie, virgin! Coryo lossing virginity | lmk if I forgot anything

「ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ:」 young! Coriolanus Snow x fem! Reader

「ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ:」 the end

「ᴀ/ɴ:」 the last chapter! I probably won't do an epilogue, i am not entirely sure on it yet! But this wraps up their story!! I hope you guys liked it! Make sure to reblog and give ne your feedback!

beta read by an angel (TRUTH) @nowitsmissing

thank you to everyone who was on this journey with me... I love you guys!

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Coriolanus finds Lucy Gray near the hanging tree. It was nearly evening. Lucy Gray's eyes were red. Coriolanus ignored the pity he felt. Soon, Lucy Gray would join Sejanus Plinth.

“Lucy Gray,” he hissed, taking her attention away from the tree.

“You'll need to leave,” he said, his voice faking desperation, “to the North. Sejanus would have wanted that.”

“What about you?” Lucy Gray asked, “What about the Covey?”

“The Covey will live, Lucy Gray, you know that. They're strong. They're survivors,” he replied, “as for me, I wish to leave with you. I can't stay in the place that took my friend.”

Coriolanus' eyes quickly filled with tears as soon as he finished. “It's all my fault,” his lips utter, “if only I could have stopped him.”

Lucy Gray looks at him, her face stricken with grief. She doesn't say anything but lets the tears fall down her cheeks. She pulls Coriolanus into a hug.

“The Peacekeepers will look for me, I'll stay in the cabin for the night,” Lucy Gray said. There was a cabin, near the lake, over the fence of the district. Nobody ventures that far except the Covey. Coriolanus and Sejanus only found out about its existence due to their connection with Lucy Gray.

He remembered all the moments he spent there with the Covey. It would be a good place for Lucy Gray to perish. Around all the greens and the music of mockingjays inside the forest.

“I'll meet you there tomorrow in the morning with supplies,” he said, holding Lucy Gray's hand, even giving it a friendly squeeze. He was afraid he was overselling the act but Lucy Gray was too sad to notice how over-the-top friendly Coriolanus was acting.

Lucy Gray nods and turns to leave. Her legs were shaky as she walked. Sejanus and Lucy Gray had to keep their relationship a secret for obvious reasons. But everyone would point at her for the mayor’s daughter's death. It didn't end with Sejanus Plinths' death. It won't because the mayor is trying to root out every single rebel, and surely he won't keep alive the girl his daughter hated so much.

Coriolanus finds his way back to the base. It's night by the time he returns. He climbs up the stairs and walks down the hallway to reach your room. He knocks and waits for you to open the door.

You do.

Coryo tried his best not to get distracted at the sight of you. You were looking so pretty. You look beautiful to him all the time. “Hi,” he gasps out.

“Hey,” you smile, giving him space to walk inside the room. Peacekeepers knew by now that something was going on between him and you. They knew better than to gossip about it though. It was clear you had the power to do anything you wanted. And everyone knew not to mess with someone from the Capitol.

That is why Coriolanus knew even if he spent the night here. He won't get in trouble. He pulls off his Peacekeeper uniform and wears one of the big, oversized sweatshirts you bought from the Capitol. The softness of the fabric makes him shy. He felt like a boy again. It was a feeling he never thought he would enjoy. For a moment, he could pretend he was in the Capitol, in his home, before the games had ever happened.

“You look comfy,” you tease him, as you find your home in his arms.

“I am,” he murmurs, his lips kissing your temple.

“I talked to Lucy Gray,” he informs you, “You were right. She's going to the north and she'll stay in the cabin for the night.”

“Hmm,” you hum, as you nuzzle your face into his shoulder, your lips pressing soft kisses to his pulse. Your arms around him, and his arms around you. Both of you caging each other. The heat of both of your bodies mingled into a pleasant warmth.

“Well, then my revolver will come in handy soon,” you whispered, a bit tired.

“They let you bring one here?” He questions.

“Special privileges,” you replied.

Any other day Coriolanus would feel jealousy pulling at his heart, a frown formatting on his face. Today, he just… didn't care. He didn't care that you had more benefits than him. He didn't care that you lived better than him.

You're his.

Could anything be better than that?

He doesn't think so.

“Typical,” he said, his head now on your shoulders.

“Uh huh,” you add, “Stay the night.”

“Of course, dove.”

You lay down on the bed beside him. His arm was thrown over your waist, and your legs tangled with him. You gently let your nails scratch at his buzz cut. He sighs, relaxing from your touch.

“Tomorrow is a big day,” you remind him, “We'll have to finish everything by noon and catch the train in the evening.”

“We?” He questioned.

“I talked with Dr. Gaul,” you revealed, a bit hesitant, “She wants you back.” You frown, “Don't let the news deter from our plan Coriolanus, it's important we leave no strings behind.”

Coriolanus blinks, trying to take in your words. A smile splits on his face. He couldn't believe this, he had thought he would have to wait for months before Dr. Gaul let him get back to the Capitol. Snow thought she would be petty like that. But you somehow managed to convince her otherwise. It was shocking, to say the least.

“I will go to the Capitol with you tomorrow,” he said. He repeats, “I'll go to the Capitol with you tomorrow!”

You giggled, “Yes, Coriolanus. You thought I would leave you behind? It took some… it doesn't matter. We'll have our happily ever after.”

“I can't believe it,” he whispers, his eyes shining with joy, even with the darkness of the room, you could see his eyes sparkling.

“You should,” you whispered, “now sleep, darling. It's a big day tomorrow.”

Coriolanus couldn't believe it. He pressed your lips against yours. “Thank you,” he lets out, “I love you.” Coriolanus takes your hand, and presses a kiss to your wrist, on the number tattooed on your skin. “I love you, my dove,” he whispered.

“I love you too, pretty boy,” you whispered.

Coriolanus pulls impossible closer as if he were trying to mold both of your souls together. “I am glad you're mine,” he said. He kissed your forehead. “You're mine forever,” he whispered, a hint of darkness, and obsession creeping into his voice.

It made you bite your lower lip as you heard the possessiveness in his voice. “I know,” you replied, “You're mine too.” You add, your voice muffled as your face was pressed into his chest, “Nobody can take you away from me ever again.”

✧ ▬▭▬ ▬▭▬ ✦✧✦ ▬▭▬ ▬▭▬ ✧

In the morning, both of you quietly wake up in each other's arms. Coriolanus yawns, “Good morning, dove.” You hum something Coriolanus couldn't hear in reply.

It was so early that the sun had just begun to rise. However, he could hear the sound of rain. Coriolanus quickly gets out of the bed. He softly pats you on the cheek, smiling as you continue to fight the battle against sleep.

“See you soon,” he whispered, taking the revolver you had in your drawer and walking out of the room. He finds himself on his bunk bed, everyone else is sleeping, and he quickly begins to pack things inside of his bags. The supplies he told Lucy Gray about. When he is done, he briefly stops by in front of Sejanus Plinth's bed.

There was a box in which Sejanus Plinth kept his belongings. Coriolanus opens it to find letters, medicine, and two photos. One of Lucy Gray. Another was of Coriolanus and Sejanus, a photo taken from the time during the broadcast of the 10th Games. It seemed like yesterday.

Coriolanus Snow had no explanation for the tears that fell down his cheeks. Sejanus Plinth was dead. Snow had given Dr. Gaul the gun, and you made her pull the trigger. It's in her hands the blood of Sejanus truly was. Not on him nor you.

Coriolanus wipes his tears away. “She's coming soon to you, buddy,” he whispered to the picture. He wondered if Sejanus would thank him for his next actions, or curse him. Coriolanus doesn't think about it much, he leaves.

Soon enough, he reaches the cabin. “Lucy Gray,” he calls out. Lucy Gray opens the door, giving Coriolanus a polite smile. Lucy Gray lets him inside. He enters, looking around the old cabin he has been inside of many times. Coriolanus sets his bag down. Wondering about what he should do next. Should he wait for you? Should he take out the gun and shoot now?

Before he can decide his next actions, Lucy Gray pulls out a knife. “I think I’ll go dig up some Katniss since we got the fire going anyway. There’s a good patch by the lake.”

“I thought they weren’t ready,” he said. Katniss was another word for swamp potato. It grew around here, but just a few days ago Lucy Gray told him it wasn't ready for harvest.

“Two weeks can make a lot of difference,” she said.

“It’s raining,” he objected. “You’ll get soaked.”

She replied, “Well, I’m not made of sugar.”

Coriolanus lets her walk outside. It was a form of mercy, trying to give her some time to run. He knew that Lucy Gray's survival instincts were good. That was the only reason she had survived the arena.

But she won't be able to survive him.

Coriolanus follows her trail after a moment passes. She wasn't down the lake as she promised, but her footsteps were towards the forest. Coriolanus smirks as he takes the revolver out, and gets the gun ready for a shot.

“Let the hunger games begin,” he whispered, “may the odds be in your favor.”

Coriolanus continues to follow her trail quietly and quickly, using the training of being a Peacekeeper. His gun pointed in front of him, ready to be shot the moment he saw her. “Lucy Gray,” he calls out, his voice warm as if he wasn't going to murder, “Where are you? We need to leave soon.”

“Lucy Gray!” He turns when he hears footsteps and shoots, hoping not to miss. The shot met with flesh, the sound booming in his ear, much more overwhelming than the tap tap of the rain. He walks towards the body that is now in front of him. Red blood mixed with the rainwater on the ground, staining the greenery around them.

He shot her right in the chest.

Lucy Gray was dead.

She joined Sejanus Plinth in the afterlife and will spend the rest of eternity cursing Coriolanus. Snow couldn't find himself to clear. He felt relieved. No one can drag him down now. The only way for him was to climb the ladder and reach the peak. Coriolanus uses his feet to turn her dead body around. There was blood dripping down her lips, her dress red and her were nearly closed. She was nothing more than a dead body. Gone was the songbird.

Now it was time to get rid of the body.

He was grateful that the rain would cover the tracks. But he had to be careful as it was easy to slip and get hurt himself. He drags the body without any rush, he thinks of you, waiting in the cabin for him to come back. Both of you will go back to the Capitol. Snow will be together with his family, in the future you'll also become his family. Everything was going to be fine.

This was nothing but a simple stepping stone.

He could feel his arms getting tired but he continued to drag the body by her arms until he reached the edge of the lake. There was a boat. He wondered briefly if he should just take her on the boat and cross to the middle of the river to let her drown. But decided that it would be too much trouble, and pushed her to the river. A big splash occurs. And he could see Lucy Gray slowly but surely falling to her end.

Lucy Gray was gone from this world forever.

He throws the revolver into the river as well. The body would decompose in a matter of days. Everyone would think of her as a traitor. Even if the Covey comes to visit the lake again, they'll never know it's their beloved Lucy Gray's grave.

Coriolanus Snow reaches the cabin and opens the door to see you holding a Peacekeeper’s gun. The same gun he had used to shoot Mayfair and Billy Taupe. “Guess Spruce hid it here,” you grin at him. You were slightly wet from the rain, unlike him, he was soaking wet.

“Yeah,” he lets out, his shoulders relaxed, his face mirroring your smile. “We'll have to throw those in the lake too.”

You chuckled, “Let's not leave any stones unturned.”

Coryo couldn't take it anymore, the adrenaline was too much. “We won't,” he said, as he walked towards you until your back was on the wall. He takes the gun from you and throws it to the side. Neither of you flinch from the loud noise, the two of you too focused on each other instead. He closes the space between the both of you.

“But for now, I want you,” he adds, “No- that's not right. I need you, here.”

He doesn't wait for a reply. He crashed his lips to yours. You find yourself kissing him back. Your tongue exploring his mouth, he sucks at your bottom lip. Not caring that his teeth are digging into your flesh too harshly, that he's responsible for the coppery taste that occurs while you continue kissing.

“You sure?” You gasp as you break the kiss. A string of saliva connecting you both. Coriolanus doesn't reply, he finds his solace from the taste of your skin. He pressed his lips to your neck, sloppily kissing down your pulse. You softly moan, tilting your head to give him more access.

Coryo takes full advantage of that. He was going to claim you any way that he could. Carving his initials on your skin wasn't the only way after all. Cumming inside of you, giving your pretty red hickeys, the print of his fingers on your hips, even the soulmate tattoo you have on your wrist. All these are ways for him to fucking own you.

And own you he shall.

He bites onto your neck as if trying to tear out your flesh. He wants to consume you, soul and all. You cry out, your back arching. Your hips meet his, and he presses his hard bulge against you. He finds himself in between your legs. Your clothed cunt against his denim-cladded cock. You begin to grind against him, as he continues the assault on your neck.

The teeth mark he placed on your skin will remain for days. It will bruise on doubt. Coriolanus didn't have it in him right now to be gentle. He was too fucking drunk on you for that. All of his desires were rushing through, breaking his walls and overwhelming his mind.

“Fuck,” he curses as he realized his lips are red from your blood. His bites had broken your skin and now tiny droplets of blood were forming. He licks them all up and murmurs an apology. He pressed his lips on yours, painting your lips the same shade as his and making you taste yourself. His hips had slowed down the grinding against you.

He steps back and begins to undress. He lets his t-shirt and jeans fall to the ground. He takes his thick cock out of the confines of his boxers. He grips the base of length, trying to control himself as he watches you follow suit.

He pulls you against him again and nods his head towards the floor. You understand his intention and lay down. He bites his lip, sudden nerves overcoming him. He doesn't know what to do despite the raunchy stories he has heard from his fellow Peacekeepers.

Is he supposed to hold your hand or your hips? Should he just push in? Isn't he supposed to prep you first? Or are you wet enough? Fuck… it wasn't the first time he was intimate with you. He hadn't gone all the way but he was familiar with your body. But most of the time he was overwhelmed with his desire to think about what to do or not to do. This time his mind was clear, he was focusing solely on you and he wanted you to experience nothing less of ecstasy from his touch.

“Coryo?” you question, bringing him out of his internal monologue. “Is there anything wrong?”

“I-” he doesn't want to admit, but he knows he has to, “I don't know what to do right now.”

“You can do whatever you like. I'll tell you if you mess up, sweetheart.”

“I know,” he sighs, his eyes on your tits, he licks his lips, “but I am-” He swallows, trying to explain, “I want you. I don't know how to take you. Everything feels like too much or too little.”

You sit up. You gently cradle his cheeks in your hands. “We have all the time in the world, Coryo. What do you wanna do first?”

“I-” He doesn't form a full sentence, instead he kisses you. His hand is on your nape and another trailing down your body as he softly nips at your lips. He dips down his hand in between your legs, he pressed his palm onto your cunt. He lets himself be coated by your arousal. His breath hitches as he feels your heat in such an obscene way.

“Oh,” he whispered as he pressed a single finger inside of your walls. “I missed this.” He remembers the night when he first felt your tight, slick walls like this. He was rough that night, a bit mean too. Coriolanus wasn't going to be the same today. He plans to worship you.

He begins to slowly thrust his index finger inside of you. His head on your shoulder, his lips kissing any inch of skin he could find as he continues to stretch you out with a single finger. Then he adds another one, he was met with resistance, but he pressed his thumb to your clit. That makes you gasp, your cunt squeezing around his fingers when his thumb begins to draw small circles on the bud.

“Relax, dove,” he whispered, giving you goosebumps.

He doesn't begin to move his fingers even when you whine impatiently, your walls twitching around his digits. Once he deems that you're relaxed enough, he begins to slowly push inside of your pussy, as deep as his fingers could reach. He was trying his best to get you ready for his cock.

His fingertips begin to press into your walls, trying to find that one spot that would get you drunk on him as much as he's drunk on you. He knows he found the spot when he feels your walls pulse around his digits like it had a heartbeat of its own. You gasp his name and he smirks. He whispers to your ear, “That's it, huh?”

“Yes!” You moan, “Faster!”

Coriolanus Snow obeys because he can never say no to you. He begins to fuck his fingers inside of you faster, slipping his ring finger inside of you as well. He thrusts his digits fast and hard, he groans as he sees your pussy stretched to accommodate his long digits. He keeps his fingers slightly curved so that with each thrust he would press into your g-spot.

“Fuck, fuck, you're so pretty.”

Coriolanus couldn't be sure if he was saying that to you, or your cunt. He continues to keep up his speed, the sloppy, wet sounds of your pussy louder than of the rain. Coriolanus could hear you moan his name as he feels your pussy get impossibly tighter around his digits before your walls begin to spasm all over, locking his digits in. He doesn't pull them out, instead, he continues to press hard onto your spongy pleasure spot until you whine his name.

Your juices were now all over his fingers. He didn't waste a second to taste them. He looks into your eyes as he licks his digits clean. He runs his tongue between the spaces of his fingers, making sure he doesn't miss a single spot. When he's done, you pull him in for a kiss. You moan into his mouth as you taste yourself, you find yourself in his lap, his back pressed to the wooden floor.

Your hand pulls at the dog tag he wore. You use the necklace like a leash, pulling at it like he's a dog you're commanding. You wrap your fingers around it, your thumb caressing the metal pendant. “You're mine,” you whispered in wonder, “You taste of me.”

Coriolanus nods, agreeing to whatever you say. He just wants you! That's it. Ruin him. Ruin him for everybody else forever! You have that power. Take it and use it, that's all he wants.

You raise your hips, taking his cock in your hand. You pressed his tip against your clit, you gasped as you slowly began to rub his cockhead against your pearl. His pre-cum coating your bud, and soon all over your cunt. You were teasing him every time you let his cockhead get near your slit, but you don't let him slip inside of you. He lets out a whimper when you do it again.

Coriolanus finds out how easily he could make you. He switches the position within a split second, his hands on your hips as he uses his weight to press you down. You don't fight back. He growls out your name, his eyes flashing in annoyan

“Please-” he whines, “stop teasing.”

“Make me,” you smirk.

“Don't-” kiss, “Play-,” kiss, “With-” kiss, “Me.”

“Not when I have waited for you for so long,” he adds.

His fingers pressed into your flesh. He gets a hold of his length and pressed it to your slit. “Can I?” He asked you, he wanted your permission. He needs your ‘yes’ before he takes you as his forever.

“Of course, Coryo.”

He begins to push in his tip, his length slipping inside of you with ease. He gasps as he feels your warmth all over his cock. The feeling is so overwhelming that he has to stop midway to not cum right away. He squeezed the base of his dick before he continued to push inside of you again, slowly inch by inch. He breathes through his mouth, his eyes closed as pleasure fills every corner of his mind. You felt perfect.

“You feel so good,” he whines.

His cock twitched inside of your walls. He bites the inside of his mouth, trying to use pain to distract himself from the mind-blowing pleasure. Meanwhile, you clenched your pussy as if to see how much his cock had stretched you. The two of you gasped from the feeling.

“Fuc- ah!”

Coryo pulls out a few of his inches and begins to thrust in. You moan out, feeling pleasure in your veins and seeing stars in your eyes. Snow's hands were on either side of your head as he balanced himself above you. His dog tag dangles in front of your lips as his hips continue to move. You wrapped your legs around his waist, pushing his cock even deeper into you. Coriolanus lets out a groan from the feeling.

“I won't be able to last long,” he admits, his cheeks getting red. Despite the overwhelming pleasure, he couldn't help but feel ashamed about how heavy his balls were with cum ready to be released inside of you.

“You will,” you whispered your hand on his nape. You squeeze it. “You will last as long as I fucking want, Coriolanus,” you said to him, pulling him down to meet your lips. The kiss was messy and open-mouthed. Another hand of yours was on his shoulder, your nails digging into his skin. You were marking him in your own way. With long, red scratches.

Coriolanus slows down, ready to please you however you want. You moan into his mouth and he eats the sound up. Coriolanus thrusts his hips faster, unable to truly control himself. How could he when you made him feel this good? He couldn't decide on the pace. He wanted this to last hours. He wanted to cum.

He kept switching between fast and slow until he found himself with his back on the floor. You are on top of him, your hands holding his hands above his head. “Be a good boy,” you said to him before you began to ride him.

You grind yourself against his cock, letting his cockhead kiss your spongy spot with each movement of your hips. Your arousal was coating your thighs and now it was on his skin as well. You were so wet and messy. Coriolanus loved it. You use one hand of yours to play with his balls. Coriolanus could feel his eyes rolling back.

“Don't- I-” he cries out in bliss when you squeeze his balls gently. You hush him with a kiss, your hips moving according to your will. You had set the perfect pace. It wasn't too much for either of you, letting the pleasure be prolonged.

He knew you were close with the way your push was contracting on his shaft. He knew you were close because your eyes were closed and fuck, you were cock drunk on him. He knew you were close because you had slowed down, and now rocking your hips back and forth. The hold you had on his hands had loosened. He breaks free without a fuss and places his hands on your hips.

He begins to push his hips up, fucking his cock into you. You whine, your eyes opening as you see him take control again. His teeth pulled at his lower lip, silencing his groans as he continues to fuck into you in this position. You use one of your hands to rub at your sensitive clit, feeling yourself getting closer to the edge.

You tense, your pussy tightening around Coriolanus’ cock. Your only warning was the moan of his name as your cunt begins to spasm around his dick. Coriolanus lets out a deep groan, his lower lip bloody from how hard his teeth dug into the flesh. He fucks you throughout your orgasm.

“Get off,” he whines, “I can't cum inside of you.”

“Do I look like I give a fuck?”

Coriolanus doesn't realize he's coming inside of you until he feels like jelly. He had stuffed you full of his thick, hot cum without a warning. But you had already stated you didn't give a fuck. So he supposed it didn't matter. All that mattered was that he had you now.

Forever.

✧ ▬▭▬ ▬▭▬ ✦✧✦ ▬▭▬ ▬▭▬ ✧

Hours later, you and Coriolanus find yourself at the train station. Ready to go back to the Capitol, once and for all. Commander Hoff had personally come to escort you both.

Coriolanus was about to enter the train. You were already inside. But Commander Hoff stops him, “Son.” Coriolanus stills, waiting to hear what Hoff has to say.

“Don't let her go. You don't know what she had to keep you safe.”

Coriolanus looks Commander Hoff in the eyes and nods. “I won't,” he promises, knowing damn well he will keep it with his life. Coriolanus gets inside the train after saying goodbye. He stops before he opens the door to the cabin you were sitting in. He pulls up the sleeve of his shirt to look at his wrist. He grins as he sees the scar reverted to the number most important to you.

It was today's date.

Coriolanus slides the door and walks to his future.

Coriolanus walks to you.

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andy-15-07 · 9 days ago

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hi there! i was wondering if you could do a ellie story again, it could be game ellie or hbo ellie you pick! but i was thinking that y/n used to have like a situationship with ellie as in they used to hook up a lot and y/n opened up to her about her past and everything and then one day ellie ices her out and y/n doesn’t know why! but one day they get paired to patrol together as a lot of the people have the flu because of it being winter and all, so they both patrol together and there’s a lot of awkward tension in the air but then a blizzard or something else happens that they have to camp out for the night and ellie finally confesses her feeling for y/n and tells her she did the whole icing out thing because she’s afraid of loosing her since she’s lost a lot of people in the past! and maybe it could end in a love scene it could just be fluff or smut whichever you wanna do!

thank you 🫠

Almost Lost You

paring ✦ Ellie Williams x fem!reader

word count ✦ 1075| requests are open (send requests, I will gladly answer them all)

The Last Of Us Masterlist

You knew something was wrong the second Ellie stopped looking you in the eye.

One day, she was pressing kisses to your shoulder after a patrol quickie, whispering, “You can talk to me. Always.”

The next, she wouldn’t even nod when you passed her on the street.

No call. No explanation. Just cold air where her warmth used to be.

You tried once , asked her if everything was okay after a meeting in the barn. She shrugged. “Busy. Got shit to do.”

Then nothing.

And you’d be lying if you said it didn’t wreck you a little.

Because you’d told her things. Things nobody else knew. You’d let her see the jagged, broken edges of you, the kind most people didn’t want to touch. But she did. She held them like glass , until she didn’t.

So when Maria paired the two of you up for patrol during a flu outbreak, your stomach dropped. Just your luck. Everyone else was sick or down with a cough, and of course she’d pair you with Ellie.

You stood by the stables with your coat zipped to your chin, silently waiting. The snow was falling in lazy spirals, wind curling under your hood. Ellie showed up ten minutes late, boots crunching over frostbitten gravel.

She didn’t say much. Just a tight nod and a quiet, “Let’s go.”

The silence stretched long as the road, tension thick enough to choke on.

You rode ahead for a while, not looking at her, until the wind picked up and the first signs of a whiteout started rolling in.

“Shit,” Ellie muttered, pulling her horse closer. “We’re not making it to Lookout Post before this turns bad.”

You scanned the woods. “There’s an old cabin. I saw it last week with Jesse. It’s a couple miles west.”

Ellie hesitated, then nodded. “Lead the way.”

The snow came fast.

By the time you reached the cabin, your fingers were stiff and red from the cold, nose running, breath jagged. Ellie kicked the door open with one boot and you both stumbled inside, stomping snow off your clothes.

It was small , just one room, half-frozen over, but dry and mostly intact. A fireplace, some chopped wood, and a dusty old couch.

Ellie got the fire going while you pulled blankets from a cabinet. You moved in a rhythm , not comfortable, but familiar. The way people who used to know each other moved.

Finally, with the fire crackling and your clothes drying near the hearth, you sat across from her on the floor, backs against opposite walls.

Still not speaking.

You lasted maybe fifteen minutes before cracking.

“Why’d you stop talking to me?”

Ellie looked up sharply.

You continued, voice low, but steady: “Was it something I said? Something I did?”

She exhaled. Looked away. “It’s not like that.”

“Then what?” you pushed. “Because you were the one who got close, Ellie. You were the one who asked me to open up, and then you,”

“I know,” she snapped, voice tight. “I know I did.”

The room went quiet again. Then softer, she added, “I just… I freaked out.”

You blinked.

“I’m not good at this,” she admitted, staring into the fire now. “Feelings. People. Not since,”

She cut herself off.

You waited. And finally, she said it.

“I’ve lost so many people, Y/N. Joel. Riley. Tess. Sam. All of them. Everyone I let in…” She shook her head, jaw clenched. “I didn’t want to lose you too.”

Your chest twisted.

“So you iced me out? That was your big plan to keep me safe?”

She winced. “No. I mean,fuck, I don’t know. I just knew that the closer I got to you, the more I’d care, and the more it’d destroy me if I lost you. And that scared the shit out of me.”

You were quiet for a moment. Then: “You think I wasn’t scared too?”

Ellie looked over at you.

“I told you things I’ve never said out loud,” you said softly. “I trusted you. You think that didn’t terrify me?”

Silence.

Then Ellie slid closer across the wood floor.

“I know I fucked up,” she whispered. “I thought I could walk away before it hurt. But all it did was hurt more.”

Your eyes met.

“I never wanted to be just a hookup to you,” you said. “But I would’ve settled for anything just to keep you close.”

Ellie’s brows drew together, like she was in pain. “You were never just a hookup. Not for a second.”

You swallowed, heart thudding.

She reached for your hand slowly, letting you pull away if you wanted , but you didn’t.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I was stupid. Scared.”

You nodded once. “I get it.”

She squeezed your fingers. “Can I make it up to you?”

You looked at her.

“Yeah,” you whispered. “Start now.”

Ellie leaned in, lips barely brushing yours , slow, tentative, reverent. Like asking permission. You kissed her back gently, then deeper, tugging her into your lap, both of you sinking into one another like gravity.

Clothes came off in hushed gasps, the fire casting gold over bare skin. Her mouth moved over your chest, her hands careful, trembling slightly.

“You sure?” she whispered, forehead to yours.

“Yeah,” you breathed, pulling her in. “I want you.”

She made love to you like she was remembering , your sounds, your warmth, the way you fell apart under her hands. And when you came together, it was like everything she never said poured out through touch alone.

Afterward, tangled in a blanket by the fire, she whispered: “You’re it for me, Y/N. You’ve always been it.”

You smiled against her neck. “I’m not going anywhere.”

You and Ellie ended up curled on the couch, sharing one too-small blanket and one too-big silence that no longer felt heavy.

Her fingers traced lazy circles on your wrist.

“When we get back,” she said softly, “I want to do this right. No more hiding. No more fear.”

You glanced at her. “You sure you’re ready?”

“I’m scared,” she admitted. “But I’m more scared of losing you again.”

You let yourself lean against her, head tucked under her chin.

“Okay,” you murmured. “We try again.”

She smiled against your hair.

And in the quiet crackle of firelight, you both finally breathed easy , not because the storm had passed, but because you knew this time, you wouldn’t have to face it alone.

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chao-thicc-hcs · 2 years ago

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Hello good sir, I was wondering if you would take the time out of your day and consider making a headcannon of the TR characters "mikey, izana , sanzu, south" reaction to "there s/o being attacked and beaten for being in a relationship with them"

I would very much appreciate if you made this HC but I do understand if you did not, thanks for indulging me🙏

a/n: it's miss ^^ Sorry for the long wait, I was burn out and tired from work.

↧ next time, for anyone wondering, please specify what timeline you want the characters to be from, especially mikey and sanzu, cuz yk

Their s/o being beaten up because they're in a relationship with them

featuring: bonten!sanzu and mikey; toman!mikey; south terano, izana kurokawa

warning(s): mentions of blood, beating up, reader being hurt, mentions of guns and drugs

n o t p r o o f r e a d !, will be edited in the future.

toman!Mikey↷

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━❧

you had a date with Mikey a little bit before a gang meet up, but you were late, something that was VERY unusual of you

he was worried and roamed around the place like a fly without its head

until you came crying to him, bruised and cut all over your body

he froze on the spot and immediately wrapped his hands around you

he was shaking, asking you what happened and all that

you had to calm down and catch your breath before being able to form a coherent sentence about what happened

you were walking to where your little date was going to take place, and a group of gang members cornered you in an alley and started punching you

thankfully, there was a cop nearby who heard your screams and scared away the assaulters

he will be furious, lifting you up and carrying you to the place where you were attacked

asks you to tell him the dudes that attacked you

if you remember correctly and show him who they were, he will start beating them up immediately. He won't care where you are

A cafe? A park? School?? He don't give a damn, he's launching on them like a rottweiler on a piece of meat

after you've successfuly ran away from the cops (if it was a public space) Mikey will take you to his room and start hugging you

He doesn't let go at all. He has his arms wrapped around you while you're laying on him, and groans if you try to move the slightest

very cautious onward. always making sure you're with him or with someone from Toman to protect you just in case

he knew that eventually, he had to face such occasion, but he's not going to let you go - he will make sure to do everything he can to protect you and instill fear in his enemies, so they don't ever touch you

finds the leader of the gang and beats them up heavily, making all the members watch, then he beats them up too

deffo asks you to sleep over for a couple of days so you can calm down and have fresh memories of him hugging you and just loving you

glares at everyone

i'd like to think nobody from Toman knows you're dating, because he is afraid that someone might be a traitor and try to do something to you

and he keeps you even more in secret, making sure you don't even look at any familiar gang faces of Mikey's, but he doesn't dare being sneaky behind your back. you have his heart, after all <3

The boy was hugging you under the dim lights of his room. It was already 8pm, and you were too tired to even bother going to your own home. The past events left both of you shaken, especially Mikey, who held you tight in his arms, as if you were about to slip away from his embrace.

He knew there will be more occasions like these, and that he had to protect you. Looking at your relaxed expression, his gaze softened, and his calloused hand gently stroked your cheek, then brushed your hair with his fingers.

-I promise to protect you with everything I've got, even if that means I have to sacrifice myself.-he muttered to himself, placing a peck on your forehead.

bonten!Mikey↷

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━❧

sitting on his chair in the gloomy office, lit only by a fucking hanging light that barely even illuminated anything, he was contemplating his life choices

his peaceful thought process was ceased by sanzu, who was carrying you in his arms bridal style, barging inside the office

"boss, someone attacked y/n. i managed to save them before it's too late."

mikey abruptly got out of the chair and rushed to you, pushing sanzu away and holding you close to him

asks you over and over again how you're feeling, his voice shaky and his eyes wide

he'd immediately place you on his lap on the chair and order the members to try and find them

you'd spend the rest of the evening snuggled on his lap, and he won't let you go

always, a l w a y s sends someone by your side when you go outside

he wants these bastards' blood to seep into the carpets, floors and even curtains of his office

he'd fucking torture them in his own office, savouring every single moment and even recording their screams to play on an mp3 or sth

most of the time, he'd coax you into spending the entire day with him and not go outside, especially when there aren't any Bonten members available to accompany you

he'd definitely try and teach you self defense, though

he'd also contemplate breaking up with you for the sake of your own health, because he KNOWS this will happen again in the future, and you might even end up dead

in the end he can't let go of you and decides to fight until the end

might take a whole week off just to stay in his apartment with you, eating the meals you prepare him and talking with you on the balcony

Chilly breeze sent shivers down your body. The night was young, the bustling streets of the city and the neon lights of the nearby clubs illuminated your faces with different colors. Mikey's gaze was fixated on you, or more precisely - your face. There were still quite a decent amount of scars and bruises on it, making his heart shatter.

You were snapped out of your thoughts when Mikey placed his hand on your lower back, the other one gently massaging your arm, pulling you in for a kiss. Without overthinking it, you returned the kiss, your arms gently placed on his shoulders.

-Nothing is ever going to separate us, my love. No matter how many of them attack, I will always be your shield.

Izana↷

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━❧

boy oh boy

izana is usually always with you, no matter where you go. he'd either glue himself to you or not see you all day

anyways on one particular evening while going to the convenience store, you were cornered and ganged on by a group of hoodlums who seemed to have not so good intentions with you

thankfully, you always told izana where you went, since danger lurks everywhere, especially because you're stuck with him

since you were not replying to his messages for too long, he wasted no second and rushed to the said store

you were hugging yourself as various other people were around you, trying to calm you down. he pushed them all away and started interrogating you (affectionately)

izana is posessive, and he will always keep you under his surveillance and won't let you go anywhere without him

if you manage to give him clear explanation who the dudes were, he'd visit their homes and beat them up with their parents one by one

takes you everywhere with him, including meetings with Tenjiku, fights, or simple hang outs

treats you like a royalty though - buys you new clothes, buys you food and etc.

a very good listener. can listen to you ramble about random stuff all day and does so, if it means it will make you feel better

treats your wounds himself, he has some decent knowledge in this aspect, at least

often takes you on rooftop dates

he basically forces you to live with him, but it's okay because he's spoiling you and you never lift a finger <3

writes songs about you and plays them on his guitar (he can't sing that well but he tries and you like it).

buys new fish for his tank and names them after both of you

Watching the fish in the tank, you were deep in thought as the two fishes Izana got for both of you move alongside each other, as if they're fallen deeply into the hazy clouds of love.

A sudden melody shot you awake from the daydream, whipping your head to see your boyfriend sitting on the couch playing his guitar, gesturing you to sit next to him. You do so and embark yourself into the melody he's performing, swaying your body left and right.

-I will never let this happen to you, again.-his voice echoed through the room as he strummed his final note.

bonten!Sanzu↷

being the fucking ass he is, he got "high" once again and accidentally got lost

actually, you lost him

you began searching every nook and alleyway, until a group of people recognized you and began ganging up on you

luckily, sanzu was near and heard your screams, and even in his drugged state, he launched himself at them and first beat them up, then blowed their brains out in front of you

you were covered in blood, and the fucker just whistled and began carrying you bridal style to your shared home

behind the walls of your own room he breaks down and starts searching your body for any bruises, cuts or wounds. Frantically asks you questions and holds you close to him

will not let you leave your shared home until he feels like it is safe

he's paranoid as hell and oftentimes expects someone to barge inside your home and hurt you again, so he's gonna patrol the home like a guard dog

always makes excuses to go with you in places. "Uh, I ah- I need a new shampoo!" "Oh, I just wanted to choose the tomatoes today!" and shit he usually would never do

Watches you in your sleep, deffo

when he prepares for work, he always leaves a small note with "take care" written on it

asks mikey to let him clock out sooner until his paranoia fades away

takes you on night rides, but the fucker has a terrible driving tactic and always makes stupid mistakes (not serious but enough to make your stomach drop)

Parking his car in a random empty parking lot, Sanzu caressed your thigh gently, fiddling with the hem of your shorts, drawing circles on your thighs, or even slightly tickling you.

Sanzu looked into your eyes like you were a renaissance painting, completely mesmerized by how perfectly the car lights illuminated your features and how immaculately your hair fell in front of your face, so much so he wasn't capable of resisting the urge to kiss and touch you on the spot.

-I will never let anyone tarnish my angel again.-Sanzu's voice was low and sensual, as his hands traversed your neck and collarbone.

South↷

you had a fight with him and stormed off your shared apartment, tears urging to escape your eyes

you knew it was risky, but fights with south are always ugly and tormenting, so you decided i'd be best for you to calm yourself down before facing him again

you visited your favourite spot where you frist met him, but unbeknowst to you - there was a surprise waiting there

south couldn't sit straight, especially after letting you go out alone in this late hour

he knew you always visited this particular place when you were upset, and thank god he arrived there on time

the last thing you remembered is him throwing the dudes into a tree and swinging them around like they were some potato sacks

you woke up in your shared apartment yet again, with south's back facing you

the hospital was far away, and he tried to take care of you alone

thankfully you weren't hurt too bad

from that day on, south kept his mouth shut more often, not daring to say anything that might upset you even the slightest and cause you to storm off the apartment alone yet again

he seemed more affectionate than usual, always carrying you around the house like royalty and insisting on doing all the chores instead

makes you bubble baths and does your hair care/body care routine for you

sings for you (it's canon he's the no 1 best singer), especially your favorite songs while he dances with you around the apartment

submerges you in gifts as an apology for causing you to get beaten up

he's feels extremely guilty, but he's not good with words, so you're stuck with him gift-giving you

Laying under the huge pile of toys South had bought for you to cuddle when he isn't around, inhaling the scent of one of his T-shirts that you were wearing - the anticipation of your lover to come back home and hold you was growing stronger and stronger.

The sun rays illuminating the room and hitting your body overwhelmed you, and you felt yourself slowly drifting into slumber, cuddling a pink bear that held a heart with South's name sewn onto it.

-Where darkness first beckoned me.-South's voice was deep and gentle, singing the lyrics of one of your favorite songs while gently brushing your hair.

the song he sang is ''into the void'' by twin tribes, chosen because it is one of my favorites

#tokyo rev #tokyo revengers #tokyo rev headcanons #tokyo revengers x you #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers headcanons #tokyo revengers angst #tokyo rev angst #mikey #sano manjiro #manjiro sano #sanzu haruchiyo #haruchiyo sanzu #izana kurokawa #kurokawa izana #south terano

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doki-doki-imagines · 1 year ago

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Hi! If requests are still open can i request mk1 men with an angel reader? Thanks!

author note: Earthrealm guys for my own sainty🫡

Johnny Cage: -"Have you fallen from Heaven? Cuz' you are an angel." "It's exactly what happened." "…Seriously? We should totally make-" "No." -The man is so curious. -He flirts here and there, but mostly, he just wants to know how angels work and how it is up there. -Maybe some juicy info will slip, and Johnny will be able to make a movie out of it…

Kenshi Takahashi: -When everybody told him you are an angel, Kenshi thought you were just a nice person. -When Johnny told him you are an angel, Kenshi thought you were also beautiful. -For sure, Kenshi never thought of feeling feathers when you protected him during a fight. -"So you are an angel." He says, breathless. "Yeah, nobody told you?" -"Will my sins be forgiven?" "My Lord welcomes every sinner seeking redemption."

Raiden: -Literal angel meets metaphorical angel. -Every time you two meet in the same room, you make it shine for how nice and good you both are. -You are both so sweet that Lao swears that some of his teeth rooted. -"Can I touch them?" "The wings?" Raiden nods. -Best experience ever: 10/10. It felt like caressing a cub and heart is relaxed better than any medicine could ever do.

Kung Lao: -"You are wayyy too nice." "I'll take it as a compliment." -He teases you restlessly, Lao wanna see the angel snap back at him. -If only he knew what you went through, he'd understand that his chances are less than zero. -The real surprise will be when you'll tease him. -"You are so cute when you blush, Lao." "????" -He is going to get you back for this.

Liu Kang: -"Do not be afraid." "Did you just steal my line?" -You are not the first angel he has seen, but it's been so long since he has been in contact with one that he'll try to keep you as long as possible on Earthrealm. -"Your presence has been healing for everyone. They hope you'll stay here for much longer." "Aren't you sure that "they" isn't just you, Liu Kang?" -Seeing him choke on his tea was a real sight, almost heavenly.

Geras: -It's not the first time Geras meets an angel, so he won't be surprised by you. -He likes to chit-chat, tho! You are both so old you for sure have a lot of stories to tell to each other. -Geras appreciates your help keeping the timelines safe, so he'll always be ready to give you a hand if you need it.

Bi-Han: -"What should I be afraid of? You are nothing more than a mythological chicken." Shows angelic true form "…fuck" -He won't treat you with any respect unless you defeat him in a fight. -Your true form will haunt him in his nightmares, tho. -"Repent Bi-Han." -Maybe an angel is the push he needs.

Kuai Liang: -He is so respectful to you, bowing every time he greets you. -Wouldn't mind training with you, and don't you dare go easy on him! -"Are my flames as hot as hell ones?" "Dear, I'm sorry, but I'm not a fallen angel. For sure, your smile is bright as our light." -Congrats! You made Liang blush, shy smile on his face making him uncharacteristically cute.

Tomas Vrbada: -"Have you fallen from Hea-" "Sorry Tomas, Johnny already tried it." "Damn it!" -Tomas looks so sweet that he reminds you of your brothers. -Too bad that then you remember his work… -He is really curious so you'll be asked a lot about your past and family. -"Are my mom and sister fine?" "I'm sorry Tomas I can't reveal anything. But relax, they are in good hands."

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aspenmissing · 5 months ago

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How about a little comfort / angst request? I think we all know that Jayce had a pretty rough time during his academy days - Nobody believed in his hextech dream, he nearly got kicked out of the academy etc.

Reader x Jayce laying in bed together and Jayce started rambling about his fears for the future. Reader comforts him and tells him, that no matter what will happen, she will always be by his side.

Maybe there is a little timeskip at the end of the story. Jayce is now the "Man of Progress" and he thanks Reader, for the past few years.

ʙʏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱɪᴅᴇ

ᴊᴀʏᴄᴇ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ || ꜰʟᴜꜰꜰ/ᴀɴɢꜱᴛ-ɪꜱʜ || 2205 ᴡᴏʀᴅꜱ ||

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: ᴛᴀʟᴋꜱ ᴏꜰ ꜰᴀɪʟᴜʀᴇ/ ꜰᴇᴀʀ ᴏꜰ ꜰᴀɪʟɪɴɢ

ʀᴇQᴜᴇꜱᴛ ᴀɴꜱᴡᴇʀ: ᴍʏ ʙᴀʙʏ ʙᴏʏ ɴᴇᴇᴅꜱ ᴄᴏᴍꜰᴏʀᴛᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴏꜱᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇꜱ, ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴊᴜꜱᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴇʀꜱᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ɢɪᴠᴇ ʜɪᴍ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴄᴏᴍꜰᴏʀᴛ! ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀɴɢꜱᴛ-ɪꜱʜ ɢᴇᴛ ᴄᴏᴍꜰᴏʀᴛ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ʟᴏᴠᴇʟʏ!

ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ | ᴊᴀʏᴄᴇ

The soft glow of candlelight flickered gently against the stone walls of the modest room they shared in Piltover. The night was serene, filled with the faint hum of distant machinery—a constant reminder of the world they were trying to change. Yet it was a peaceful quiet, the kind that allowed reflection without interruption. Jayce lay with his head resting against Y/N’s chest, his body half-pressed to hers. His arms were loosely draped across her waist, but his thoughts were far away, staring up at the ceiling, his mind heavy with the weight of the future.

It had been an exhausting week—countless meetings, all with different people who questioned his every step, who doubted his vision for Hextech, or dismissed it as foolishness. He could feel it in his bones, the pressure, the uncertainty. Despite his achievements, despite how far he had come, the doubts crept in from all sides. And the worst part was, it wasn’t just others who questioned him. Sometimes, he wondered if he was the one who didn’t believe enough in his dream.

Y/N, ever so attuned to his moods, noticed the tenseness in his posture, the way his chest rose and fell in uneven breaths. It wasn’t often that Jayce allowed himself to be vulnerable in front of others, and especially not in front of her. But tonight, it was different. The mask he wore to shield himself from the world had slipped just enough for his fears to leak out.

His voice was soft, almost hesitant as he broke the silence.

“I don’t know if I can do this, Y/N...” His words felt heavy, laden with the doubts he had kept buried for so long. “I’ve come so far, but sometimes it feels like I’m always on the edge of failure. Every time I think I’m close to something, someone reminds me that it’s impossible, that I’m just chasing a dream that’ll never come true.” His grip tightened slightly around her waist, as if trying to anchor himself to something real, something tangible. “And then everything that happened at the academy... After almost being kicked out for my ideas... I can’t help but wonder if I’m even meant for this.”

Y/N felt a pang in her chest at his words, her heart aching with the quiet sorrow that tinged his voice. She could feel the vulnerability in the way his body shifted against hers, his frame tense as if he were afraid that even admitting his fear might shatter everything. Her fingers traced the line of his hair, threading through the strands slowly, offering the comfort she knew he needed.

“Jayce...” Her voice was soft but unwavering. “You’ve already done more than anyone could’ve imagined. You fought for your dream when everyone else told you it was impossible. You didn’t let the academy or anyone else stop you from believing in Hextech. And now... look at what you’ve built. You’ve created something that’s going to change everything, not just for Piltover, but for the whole world. You’ve made a difference.”

He shifted slightly, looking up at her, his expression filled with doubt as his eyes searched hers. It was as if he were asking for permission to believe again, permission to trust in himself, and in the dream he’d spent years chasing. Y/N smiled softly, her thumb tracing circles on his back as she continued, her voice steady with conviction.

“Viktor believes in you too, you know?” she said, her words carrying a weight of their own. “From the very beginning, he saw something in you—something no one else did. Even when others doubted you, even when they tried to push you out, he believed. He’s always been by your side, just like I have. I think that’s because he sees the same potential in you that you sometimes can’t see in yourself.”

Jayce’s breath caught in his throat as he processed her words. Viktor had always been a quiet presence in his life, never one for grand gestures, but always there in the background, supporting him in ways that were often subtle but powerful. He had never doubted Viktor’s loyalty, but hearing Y/N say it, hearing the sincerity in her voice, helped solidify something inside him—something that had been shaken but never truly broken.

“Do you really think I can make this work?” Jayce whispered, his voice barely audible as he searched for reassurance.

Y/N shifted slightly, brushing a stray lock of hair from his forehead. Her chin rested gently on top of his head, and she spoke with a quiet strength that was all her own. “I know you can. You’ve got everything it takes, Jayce. Your brilliance, your drive, your heart. But what matters most is that you’re not alone in this. You have Viktor, and you have me. We’re not going anywhere. No matter what happens, no matter how hard things get, I will always be by your side.”

Her words were a promise, an anchor that held him steady in the storm of his doubts. The sincerity in her voice, the certainty of her belief in him, reached into the places he had locked away for so long. Her touch, soft yet unwavering, seemed to dissolve the tension in his body, replacing it with something warm and comforting.

Jayce closed his eyes, breathing deeply as the steady rhythm of Y/N’s heartbeat beneath his ear calmed him. For a brief moment, the weight of the world lifted, and he could finally relax, allowing himself to be held by the love and support that had always surrounded him, even when he couldn’t see it.

“Thank you, Y/N,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Y/N’s fingers gently carded through his hair, her touch tender. “You’ll never have to find out. We’re in this together. Always.”

Jayce allowed himself to surrender to the comfort of her presence, his body relaxing against hers. The future still seemed uncertain, filled with the unknown, but with Y/N’s belief in him, and Viktor’s quiet support, Jayce finally felt he wasn’t walking that path alone.

For the first time in what felt like forever, Jayce felt at peace. The weight of his doubts hadn’t entirely disappeared, but the fear of failure was no longer all-consuming. With Y/N beside him, with Viktor’s faith in him, he had something far stronger than the uncertainty of the future—he had the belief that he could face whatever came next, no matter how difficult it might be.

The grand hall was abuzz with excitement, the rich echo of conversation blending with the rhythmic clinking of glasses. Piltover’s finest had gathered to celebrate the monumental success of Hextech—an invention that had once seemed like a far-off dream but had now changed the face of their world. The brilliant glow of the machines that powered Hextech illuminated the room, casting a warm light on the faces of the people who had once doubted Jayce. But now, in the glow of progress, there was nothing but admiration and awe.

Standing at the front of the room, Jayce looked every bit the man of progress, his sharp suit a testament to his success. The podium in front of him gleamed with polished metal, the heart of Hextech resting just behind him, a symbol of how far they had come. The crowd quieted as he prepared to speak, his gaze sweeping over the room—over the faces of the people who had supported him, and those who had once looked down on his dream.

Jayce cleared his throat, his voice carrying clearly through the room.

“Tonight, we stand on the precipice of a new era,” he began, his tone filled with pride. “Hextech is not just an invention—it is a symbol of what we can achieve when we dare to dream. It began as an idea, a spark of inspiration, and despite all the challenges, the setbacks, and the doubts, it has become something that will change the future. It is proof that innovation, perseverance, and belief in something greater than ourselves can bring about the impossible.”

The room broke into applause, but Jayce’s gaze shifted slightly, his eyes searching for a familiar face. A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth as he found her standing near the back, watching him with that quiet, unwavering support that had never once faltered. Y/N. The one person who had believed in him before anyone else, who had stood by him when the world had been at its most uncertain.

“None of this would have been possible without the one person who never stopped believing in me, even when I couldn’t believe in myself,” Jayce continued, his voice softer now, but filled with sincerity. “Y/N... these past few years, you’ve been my strength, my constant. You’ve been the one who reminded me that progress is not just about the work we do, but the people we trust along the way. I owe you everything.”

There was a noticeable shift in the room, the whispers of the crowd fading as they turned to see the two of them. Y/N’s heart skipped a beat, a gentle blush colouring her cheeks as Jayce looked at her with a tenderness that had always been there, but now, it shone brighter than ever. She hadn’t expected this—this public declaration of gratitude, of love. But there it was, in front of everyone. Jayce had never been one for grand gestures, but in that moment, he made the one that mattered most.

The applause that followed was loud, but Jayce’s focus remained entirely on Y/N. He stepped away from the podium, his eyes never leaving hers as the crowd celebrated in the background. He made his way to her, taking her hand in his, his voice low enough for only her to hear.

“You were the first person who believed in me,” he murmured, his thumb brushing over her knuckles. “You’ve been there for every step of this journey... and I want to spend the rest of my life proving to you that your belief in me was never misplaced.”

As the celebration continued, Jayce guided Y/N through the crowd, his hand never leaving hers. They made their way to the balcony, away from the noise and the spectacle, to a quieter, more intimate space. The city lights of Piltover stretched out before them, a sea of gold and silver beneath the starry sky. The evening air was cool, carrying a soft breeze that rustled through the trees, but in the silence of the balcony, it felt like time had stopped.

Jayce took a deep breath, steadying himself as he turned to face her. His hands were warm against her skin, his fingers gently tracing the curve of her cheek. For a moment, he just stood there, looking at her as if he were seeing her for the first time all over again—the woman who had stood beside him through every trial, every triumph.

“Y/N,” he began, his voice more serious now, but no less full of the love he’d carried for so long. “I don’t think I ever really told you how much you mean to me. You’ve been my rock, my anchor in a world that never stops moving. I can’t imagine a future without you, and I don’t want to.”

Her breath caught in her throat, the weight of his words settling in her heart. She could see the sincerity in his eyes, the vulnerability that he didn’t often show to anyone. The man who had once feared failure, who had doubted himself at every turn, was standing before her, stronger and more certain than ever.

“I love you,” Jayce continued, his voice breaking slightly with the raw emotion he could no longer hold back. “And I want to spend every day for the rest of my life with you by my side. Will you marry me?”

The words hung in the air, their significance too profound for any immediate response. Y/N’s heart raced, her pulse thudding in her ears as she stared at him, the world around them fading into the background. Her mind was a whirl of thoughts—of the journey they had taken together, the dreams they had shared, the struggles they had faced side by side.

“I...” she began, her voice soft but steady. “I don’t think I could ever want anything more.”

Jayce’s face lit up, a mixture of relief and joy washing over him. Slowly, he took her hands, sliding a ring onto her finger—simple, elegant, but in its simplicity, it held everything.

Y/N smiled, tears threatening to spill as she gazed at the man who had captured her heart in a way no one else ever could. She had always known that their journey wasn’t just about Hextech or progress—it was about them, about the love they had built, the trust they had forged through the years.

And now, as she stood there, the stars above them and the city beneath, she knew that no matter what the future held, they would face it together.

Jayce leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to her lips, sealing the promise of their future.

#Arcane #Arcane Fandom #arcane fluff #reader insert #Fluff #jayce x y/n #jayce x reader #jayce talis x reader #jayce x you

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ninahulk54 · 1 month ago

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I Remember (Lewis x George)

📩 Undated letter. Signed only with a “G.”

Found in the pocket of a jacket Lewis forgot to take with him.

I do remember.

I remember the first day. How you walked into the hospitality and looked at me like you already knew what it was going to be. Not my career. Me.

I remember the first podium we shared. When we hugged without thinking of anything else but that moment. The cameras were there, yes, but you and I were somewhere else.

I remember when you laughed at how I fold my shirts, how you corrected my posture when we were studying telemetry, how you always knew when I was lying with “I'm fine”.

I remember the nights after the races, when you didn't want to go to the hotel and we ended up in the truck, sharing what little we could without crossing that line.

I remember that line.

And how I spent the whole time wishing I could cross it.

Maybe we were never anything. Maybe we were just a possibility. But you were the possibility that hurt me the most not to live.

And now you're leaving.

They tell me it's historic. That it's legendary. That it's perfect. Ferrari. The last dance.

But I can't help but think it's also the end of us. Of whatever we were. Of what we never said.

Remember when you told me “if we don't talk about it, it doesn't hurt”? Bullshit. It's hurting just the same.

And that's okay.

I'm not writing to ask you to stay. I'm not even writing to make you look at me differently.

Just to tell you that I remember.

And if you do too, even if it's on nights when no one sees you, then I don't feel so alone anymore.

Take care of yourself.

And if you can, remember.

-G

(P.S. I still have the bracelet you gave me at Silverstone. I don't wear it. But I don't throw it away either).

📩 Handwritten letter, found inside George's helmet, after the Spanish GP.

Signed, "I was always your home. -L"

I told myself I need nobody else

I was never good at letting go.

I left Mercedes because everyone said it was time. Because sometimes, even if the body wants to stay, the soul needs to move.

But no one warned me that the hardest thing wasn't saying goodbye to the team. It was saying goodbye to you.

Because yes, George.

I remember you too.

I remember your silly jokes when we failed in quali.

How you always had a ready word for when I was sinking in my own head.

I remember the time I almost cried after Arabia, and you didn't say anything, you just let me stay in your room until I got over it.

I remember your hands. Always in your pockets, as if you were afraid of feeling too much.

I remember how you looked at me when you thought I didn't see you.

I remember.

And, George...

Maybe what we had was never a movie romance. Maybe it was something softer. More invisible. Something that only exists in the margins.

But it was real.

Because I left for Ferrari carrying more of your stuff than my own.

And now, after racing with you again, after looking at you sideways on the podium and pretending I didn't want to touch you....

I realized that there are things that even the brightest red can't erase.

Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had had the courage to stay.

But maybe... just maybe...

We are realizing that this was never about staying or leaving.

It was about remembering.

And I remember you all the time.

-I was always your home.

-L

(P.S. I still wear the bracelet. Although no one knows why.)

https://open.spotify.com/intl-es/track/06xncr26JLfxP1ZQ08FNp8?si=6b08c74cd4814f5f

#britcedes #4463 #gewis #george russell #lewis hamilton #f1 fanfic #symphonic letters

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tieronecrush · 2 years ago

Text

seven minutes in heaven (the bathroom)

frankie morales x f!reader

rating: E (18+ only, MDNI)

summary: it's your roommate ben miller's birthday and he's invited the special forces guys over and asked you to invite some of your friends. the night comes down to a throwback game of seven minutes in heaven. you've been into frankie for months, so when your name and frankie's are pulled together, you can't help but wonder what can happen in seven minutes?

word count: 2.9k

warnings: mentions of a break up, alcohol use/drunkeness (benny), grumpy frankie, use of pet names (mariposa, hermosa, cariño), dirty talk in spanish (i hate conjugations so pls let me know if anything is wrong lol), mirror sex, unprotected sex, breathplay? (mouth gets covered), pls let me know if i am missing anything

“You gotta be kiddin’ me, man. Why are we playing this shit? We’re all grown adults,” Frankie huffs to your right in the small circle in yours and Ben Miller’s living room. His arms are crossed over his chest, gray t-shirt pulling taut at his shoulders. Warm brown eyes are rolling up to the ceiling under the brim of his Standard Oil hat that you swear is glued to his head — you’ve never seen him without for as long as you’ve lived with Benny — and it works to hide the luscious dark curls that fight to peek out around it.

“Oh, loosen up, Fish! We’re all here to have fun, so just play the game. Everyone here’s agreed to it, and it’s my fucking birthday so you have to do what I say!” Benny leans forward next to you on the couch, projecting his voice toward Frankie and gesturing vaguely around with his hands while his words start to slur together.

You laugh softly, patting Ben’s shoulder and nodding your head to get him to lean back on the couch again instead of trying to get in his friend’s face. Truth was, the prospect of this game did stir up some nerves in your stomach, even as an adult, but you wouldn’t dare go against Benny’s birthday wishes. So, you’re stuck playing Seven Minutes in Heaven with his Special Forces buddies, his brother, and a good mix of your friends that Benny has…taken a liking to.

It was one of the perks he got excited about when you’d come to him, a bit desperate, needing a place to live when your long term boyfriend of four years broke it off with you and asked you to move out. He agreed to have you in his guest room for the foreseeable future until you could scrounge up enough for rent somewhere on your own, and that first weekend he begged to throw you a “welcome party”, which was his ploy to get a bunch of your friends over for him to chat up.

That was a few months ago now, and it happened to also be the first time you met Frankie — Catfish to the Special Forces guys.

And since then, it’s been months filled with tension between you two, awkward interactions and quick touches to pass him drinks or him scooting behind you in your tiny kitchen when he was over. It was always heated with you two, electricity flowing with a current and waiting for a spark. But Frankie was a gentleman, never assuming or overly forthcoming, and you were, well, rusty. Not dating in four years really throws you for a loop when trying to hook up with someone.

Frankie’s eyes meet yours when your laugh reaches him, a flash of excitement evident in the widening of his pupils. A smile stretches across your face at him, shaking your head.

“Probably don’t want to go against this birthday boy, Frankie. He’s not afraid to guilt you into things, or worse, just bother the shit out of you until you do what he wants. Plus, nobody has to know what does or doesn’t happen behind the door.”

Ben whips his head towards you with an exaggerated shock in his face, Frankie’s chuckle low as everyone else laughs.

“Don’t give him any ideas about not fully immersing in the game. He’s just bein’ a grumpy old bastard.”

Benny turns away from you as Frankie rolls his eyes again, the birthday boy pulling out two names from the bowl in the center. It ends up being one of your friends and Santiago, which earns a cheer knowing his suave reputation. Once the two are back in the bathroom, the younger Miller brother sets a timer on his phone and everyone gets to chatting and drinking again. You and Benny argued back and forth before the party about using the other’s room for the game, finally deciding to use the hall bath for sake of neutrality. And clean sheets.

A handful of rounds have come and gone, people returning with smirks or poker faces, everyone trying to pull out any information from the participants. You have yet to go, and it’s the same case for Frankie. Benny’s been choosing the names for everyone, hiding them close to his chest and throwing them back in the bowl to be selected again.

You watch Ben pick out two new slips, reading your name off of the first one. Echoes of your quickening pulse thud in your ears, heat rooting across the nape of your neck. Ben’s eyes dart to Pope as he looks at the second slip of paper, and your stomach drops with disappointment from the high hopes you didn’t realize you had. Your own eyes fall to your lap as you wait to hear Santiago’s name out loud, molars biting the inside of your cheek to attempt to swallow your small pill of upset.

“And Fish.”

Your vision fills with Ben’s side profile, your stomach now doing somersaults as nerves begin to take over. Your mouth dries, tongue pushing against the roof of your mouth and sucking in your cheeks to try to conjure up any saliva. Frankie seems nearly as surprised, or is it nervous? Contempt? He’s hard to read at the moment; the only clues into his reaction are the split second of widened eyes and rubbing his palms up and down his denim-clad thighs before he stands and looks at you.

The hooting and hollering start when you get up from your spot on the couch, small steps leading Frankie and yourself down the hallway away from the party and into your bathroom. Nothing is said as he closes the door and locks it, his large frame turning back to face you across the small tiled floor while he leans back on the door’s surface.

His eyes lock on you, pinprick shocks following their wake as he takes you in from head to toe. There’s still a neutral expression on his face, hands slipped into his front pockets. Your own gaze fixed on your tray of makeup at the side of vanity, anxious fingers reaching out to fidget with a lip gloss. The silence in the room is deafening, the muffled sounds of the group only filling the dead air so much. After what feels like an eternity, you can’t take it, clearing your throat and speaking up.

“We don’t, um, obviously don’t have to do anything.”

You’re still not looking at Frankie when you hear his gruff voice respond.

“Is that what you want, mariposa? To do nothing?”

He grabs your attention with the nickname, a swirl of butterflies batting their wings wildly in your gut when you take in a new expression on his face. Tender eyes with a flirty smirk. Pushing off of the door, his strides take him only two steps before he’s in front of you, hand pulling his hat up and the other raking through his hair in a nervous twitch. Your lower back presses into the edge of the countertop, mouth blubbering like a fish as you try to formulate a sentence.

“Cause, if I’m honest, I don’t want to do nothing,” Frankie’s hand finds the counter at your side, one arm brushing against your shirt. His other reaches for your cheek, hovering over close enough for you to feel the warmth radiating off of his palm, “I’ve really wanted to kiss you since I met you. Can I please do that, hermosa?”

“Yeah, you can, Frankie,” comes out breathy and pathetic from your mouth, half a whimper as you wait for the moment you’ve thought of since you saw him in your kitchen.

In an instant, Frankie’s lips are on yours in a gentle but confident kiss. His hand has found your cheek finally, laying passively before it grips tighter and tilts your head back to give him more leverage over you. The embrace turns heady, his mouth slanted into yours as the two of you move together quickly to make up for all the lost moments from months prior.

When his tongue melds against yours, a soft moan slips out and is swallowed into his mouth. The noise pushes Frankie toward you, close to the point that his front is pressed entirely against you. You can feel how hard he is, the way his bulge digs in against you sending another moan out of your mouth. His large hands leave their places on your cheek and the counter, grabbing fistfuls of your hips and your ass. Frankie pulls away enough to speak against your swollen lips, short and demanding.

“Up.”

With one effortless lift as you jump, you're seated on the countertop, and Frankie’s kissing you hard again. Your own hands rest one on his shoulder, the other reaching to take his cap off and discard it on the ground, fingers combing through his hair. An arm wraps around your lower back, tugging you across the cool stone surface to the edge. His other hand grips the back of your thigh, pulling your legs further apart to slot himself between them, grinding himself against your clothed center. The feeling of pressure on your clit makes your head fall back from his kiss, a whimper pulling out of your chest as your hips work to catch more of the feeling.

“Y’know, I’m pretty sure we don’t have much time left before someone’s gonna be banging down the door, but I want you so bad right now, hermosa.”

Your head drops forward again, staring into Frankie’s eyes that are very clearly blackened with desire even in the low lighting of the bathroom. Licking your bottom lip, you nod quickly and mutter out.

“Fuck me, Frankie. I don’t care how fast or rough you need to be, just please fuck me.”

A groan comes from him at your words as he grabs you again, dragging you off the counter to stand on your feet again. His hands on your hips turn you around to face the mirror, making eye contact in the reflection.

“Take your shorts and panties off for me, cariño. Gotta be quick.” He winks at you, a light smack to your ass before he pops the button on his jeans and drags the zipper down. You do the same with your denim shorts, dropping the material along with your underwear to your ankles, stepping one out.

Behind you, Frankie has pulled his pants and boxers halfway down his thighs. One of his hands finds your lower back, gently coaxing you to bend forward on the counter. His other set of fingers prod through your folds, a breathy moan coming from him as he feels your wetness.

“This all from me kissing you, hermosa?”

“Nah uh. It’s from just being in the same room as you all night.”

“Mmm, you’ve wanted me that bad, angel? Should’ve said something. We could’ve been having lots of fun these past few months.”

“I was—I was shy.”

Frankie shakes his head as he looks at you in the mirror, a devilish smirk on his face.

“Don’t think you’re shy now, cariño. Eres una chica traviesa (You’re a naughty girl),” his fingers slip into your entrance for a few ticks, a gasp fogging the glass in front of you as he pulls them out, “You ready for me, mariposa? Might be a lot to take.”

He winks with a smug look on his face, messy curls hanging over his forehead and framing his face.

“Francisco, just fuck me already. We’re losing time that you could be inside of me.” Your frustration bubbles over out of impatience. He waits for another beat to tease you, and when you open your mouth to complain again, he drives his cock into you.

His smugness was granted — the way he’s filling you up completely is unlike anyone you’ve had before.

As if he knew your reaction before it happened, his hand covers your mouth to muffle the loud moan that jerks out of you. Frankie wastes no time, his thrusts starting fast and hard from behind.

“This what you wanted, mariposa? Wanted me to fuck your hard and fast? A mi chica le gusta sucio, no? (My girl likes it dirty, right?)”

Your response is stifled by his hand, the only sounds in the room Frankie’s low voice and the slap of his thighs against your ass. Your eyes screw shut at the feeling of his cock dragging in and out of your walls quickly, the head of his length brushing that extra sensitive spot inside of you.

“Nah uh, cariño. Eyes open. Want you to watch me fuck you like the dirty girl you are.” Frankie’s hand squeezes your ass tightly, a yelp coming out of your mouth from behind his hand. You open your eyes and look at him in the mirror, sweat building on your forehead and your exposed collarbone. He makes eye contact with you in the reflection, his hips fucking into you rougher.

“Fuck, don’t you look pretty taking my cock? Es todo lo que soñaste, hermosa? (Is it everything you dreamed of, beautiful?)”

Your tongue pokes out of your mouth, licking the salty skin of his fingers. Frankie groans quietly and shifts the position of his hand, two of his thick fingers pressing in between your lips to fill your mouth.

“Chupa, cariño. Suck.”

Following his demand, your cheeks concave and your tongue swirls around them in your mouth. Frankie’s eyes darken further as he watches in the reflection, thrusts becoming sloppier.

“‘M so close, cariño, don’t think I can last much longer. You gotta be quiet while I take care of you, yeah?”

Without an answer, his fingers slip from your mouth. His other hand finds your lower stomach, pulling you up to stand with your shoulders against his chest, cock filling you up with each drag of his hips. The fingers wet with your saliva are quick to circle your clit, the extra stimulation barreling you towards the edge.

“Oh fuck, Frankie! Yes, yes, yes!” Your whines are as quiet as you can make them, the back of your head pressing hard into his shoulder as his next thrust sends your vision black and muscles taut. Every thought in your brain seeps away, pleasure filling every crevice of you.

Your walls squeeze around his cock, nails digging into his arm around you as he fucks you through your orgasm while chasing his own.

“Fucking hell, mariposa. Pussy’s fucking milking my cock, god. So tight. Eres tan perfecta para mi (You are so perfect for me).”

He thrusts his cock one, two, three more times before he pulls out quickly, replacing the feeling of you with his fist and repeating your name over and over under his breath. The sound of your come around his cock nearly drops you to your knees to take him in your mouth, but the looming pressure of time keeps you standing, compromising by bending over the counter again. Ropes of his warm come paint your ass and your wet cunt, a whine falling from your lips as his own soft, melodic whimpers fill your ears.

It’s quiet in the room except for the gasps of breaths you both take to calm down, eye contact made through the mirror as you both smile widely at each other. Nothing else is spoken as Frankie grabs tissues from the shelf above the toilet, wiping his come from your skin. Before he clean it up entirely, you swipe a fingertip through one streak, bring it to your lips to suck it clean. His mouth hangs open at the sight and you smirk satisfied, winking before you pull up your underwear and fasten your shorts up again.

Both of you are buttoning as a fist pounds on the door, the sound of a phone alarm following it. Benny’s voice booms from the other side, a cackle evident in his tone.

“Time’s up, boring fucks!”

Frankie looks at you with a sweet smile, nodding toward the door, “Ready?”

You exhale a chuckle and nod, taking a look in the mirror and making eye contact with Frankie as he looks at your reflection tenderly. Your hands brush at your hair, tapping the sweaty makeup back into your skin. Frankie shakes his head behind you, tugging you around by your belt loops. He leans down, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips.

“Ladies first, mariposa.”

You step ahead of him, swinging the door open after twisting the lock undone and being met with a stumbling Benny on the other side.

He looks between the two of you, suspicion on his face as he tries to read your minds. Both of you have a poker face on, and he groans, shaking his head.

“Took you both long enough. What, were you fixing your clothes?”

“No, Frankie was just watching as I fixed up my makeup and had a catch-up. Nothing exciting for you to gossip about, Benny.”

He groans, marching back to the living room, “They didn’t do anything! Just fucking talked like losers.”

Frankie chuckles behind you, his warm palm rubbing against your lower back as you walk down the hall in front of him. His touch drops from you when you enter the party, both of you returning to your original seats and falling back into the conversation as the game switches to Truth or Dare.

Santiago glances at Frankie sitting next to him, chuckling to himself, “Zipper’s down, Fish.”

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taglist (everything/frankie): @vee-bees-blog @joelsflannel @casa-boiardi @wannab-urs @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @fishingforpike @msjarvis @swiftispunk @northernbluess @walkintotheriveranddisappear @sugadolly @yazsos @addictedtotlou @cannolighost @atinylittlepain

#frankie #writing #frankie morales fanfic #frankie morales fic #frankie morales fanfiction #frankie morales x f!reader #frankie morales x you #frankie morales x fem!reader #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales smut #triple frontier fic #triple frontier fanfic

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lochlogie · 23 days ago

Text

Another fic idea 😩

So Lochy's in college, and he's taking an art class. It's just an elective, though he's still not sure what he wants his major to be. Most of the other students in this class are women. It's a seminar on sketching the nude form. Lochy thinks it's a little salacious, he hopes he doesn't sound too lewd when he asks one of his classmates if they're going to be drawing naked girls every day.

She laughs, not at all suspecting he's anything but gay. "This semester it's a male model, actually." Oh... well that works too, doesn't it? And Lochy blushes slightly, because the prospect of drawing a hot naked man is kind of exciting.

But when Lochy shows up for the first session, who should be situated in the middle of the room, posing and honest to God preening, but Saxon.

Lochy almost runs out of the room right then and there. But Saxon beats him to it, as in, he grabs Lochy by the arm and pulls him outside.

"Did you sign up for this class on purpose?" Saxon hisses, and yeah he didn't put on any underwear so his dick is swinging around and thank God nobody's around to see this.

"What? No! I didn't even- since when do you model?" Lochy can't remember the last time he's been so flustered, hates that Saxon can undo so many months of progress with that stupid big dick just out in the air, those stupid oiled up muscles that Lochy wants to run his hands over, that stupid judgmental face that Lochy wants to kiss.

And it was maybe the wrong idea for Saxon to drag Lochy out with hushed whispering because now all the girls in the class know they know each other. One of them later asks Lochy with a smirk "Is he your boyfriend or something?" and a few of the other girls titter, because isn't the model just so handsome and dreamy? Have you ever seen muscles so rippling and perfect? And his penis... wow! Lochy you're so lucky to be sleeping with a guy like that!

And Lochy doesn't know if he should admit "Worse, he's my brother," or if he should just lie and go with it. Because it would be weird that he hasn't dropped the class, wouldn't it? If everyone knew the model is his brother? It would also be a little hard to explain why he's so good at drawing Saxon's penis, how he can get every detail, every vein, how he just instinctively knows the way it droops... and he doesn't even look at it for more than a few seconds.

It's kind of erotic too... keeping the secret, while he gets to stare at Saxon every day and draw every inch of his gorgeous body. And Saxon struggles not to get hard, knowing Lochy's eyes are raking over him, and his slender fingers are working away at the easel, capturing his form in immortal charcoal.

Do they fuck after class because the tension becomes too much to bare? I don't know, the girls in class seem to think so. The instructor even seems to think so (she has to know they both have the same last name too, so her wry smirks every time Saxon and Lochy leave class walking in the same direction... are a bit revealing. Maybe she's into it, just like Chloe was.

Lochy presents Saxon his final sketch at the end of the semester, as a kind of gift. Saxon blushes. "Is this how you see me?" he asks, afraid to smudge his likeness. Lochy nods, his own blush rising to his cheeks. "You're beautiful," he says dumbly. Saxon can't respond by doing anything but kissing him tenderly.

And no matter what happens next, where they go from here, what woman Saxon marries and has a hollow imitation of a life with, that framed picture of him that Lochy drew is proudly displayed on a mantlepiece or a side table. And everyone who ever sees it is a little perturbed Saxon has a naked portrait of himself, but they always compliment the artistry itself. Saxon just smiles, says someone special made it for him.

Oh did I forget to mention that for all of Saxon's initial accusations it was Saxon who volunteered to model for the class when he found out Lochy was going to take it? In fact, he may have even pulled some strings to get the original guy to suddenly drop out 😶

#saxloch #saxon x lochlan #saxon ratliff #lochlan ratliff

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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 25 days ago

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Who's Afraid of Ghosts?

creativitwins fluff with a side dish of roman angst for the soul?? – anon

hiiii would you write about parental janus and big protective brother remus over roman?? I've been rereading quiet brain corner and I NEED more of our duo being protective over our smol prince – anon

Hey there! Recently I've been rereading some of your sanders sides works, and I apsolutely love them! While I was reading them I got a thought about Roman being in love with all the other sides (-Remus obviously) but not being able to tell if it's platonic, familial or romantic. Could end up with aro, ace, aroace, or demi Roman, and it could end up with a relationship of some type, or everyone just being friends. If you don't want to write this, that's completely fine! But I'd love to see your take on this if you have the time and energy for it. – anon

Might I request some platonic prinxiety? Their dynamic is very special to me – anon

Read on Ao3

Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse for like 2 seconds

Pairings: basically every single variation of relationship with Roman/everyone else, platonic or romantic literally who knows

Word Count: 5817

If you asked Roman what he thought would happen after he finally, finally reconnected with his brother after their parents did their level best to make sure the 'good son' and the 'bad son' never spoke again, the last thing he would've said is 'I get adopted by his new friends' family.'

And yet, that's a remarkably accurate description for why he currently finds himself in the middle seat, driving towards an abandoned ghost town, rumored to be the most haunted place within a five-hour drive.

That requires a little more explaining. First, words can't describe how good it felt just to see Remus again. For a long time, his last memory of his brother was a memory with his mother's too-sharp nails digging into his arm under the guise of a loving touch, chest heaving and tears blurring his eyes as his father shut the door on a mirroring face trying to scrabble back inside, to get to him, to get to his brother, why did they make him leave, and his parents trying to soothe him by saying that Remus was older, he knew better than to do what he was doing, and if he couldn't see that they were just trying to help him, then he could face the consequences on his own. Roman had never believed his parents when they scoffed at the TV or rolled their eyes at news articles and he knew he couldn't trust them when they kicked his older brother out just for being him, but he was young and scared and didn't know what to do if they kicked him out too, and so he searched for Remus at school and at the park and at all the places they would go because Remus needed to know that he hadn't wanted to kick him out. Never.

Remus knew. Remus always knew. And when Roman's parents relented to his aunt's insistent pleadings for Roman to come spend the night at her house, he'd walked into the living room and seen Remus sitting on the couch with the biggest grin on his face and he hadn't left his brother's arms for three hours. Remus had run straight to the only other member of their family in town and she'd taken him in without question. Roman had to smother his tears in his brother's shoulder when Remus admitted, through a lump in his throat, that the very next thing he'd done after he'd cried out his relief that he had a place to stay was to ask how soon they could get Roman out too.

"I…I can come stay with you?"

His aunt's face had broken into a devastated expression as she wraps her arms around both of them, murmuring of course you can stay, baby, you're my baby too, I take care of my boys. And that was that. Roman's parents had put up a fight, of course, not wanting to lose their picture-perfect family image with Roman and Remus out of their lives for good, but his aunt threatened to take them to court over it and that wasn't something they wanted either. Nobody messed with Aunt Donna.

Roman did ask her once if they did go to court, if they would've won, and Aunt Donna just smiled and ruffled his hair, saying that one of her oldest, closest friends was the best lawyer in New York City, damn right they would win, and Roman never worries about it ever again.

Remus had been as proud as a peacock, introducing his 'baby Ro-bro' to his group of friends as soon as he could. And apparently, as Remus tells it, they'd taken one look at his 'adorable little face' and decided that nope, our baby Ro-bro now. Roman would like to point out that he is the same age as one of them and Remus waves his hand every time.

"You have little brother energy, Roro. Can't be helped."

He supposes that yeah, if the self-proclaimed 'baby of the family' agrees that he's got such strong little brother energy, he can't really do anything about it. Virgil might be his age—"I'm a month older than you, Princey, don't forget it!"—but he's gotten scooped into the role of 'younger person I get to tease and annoy' faster than he could blink. The nickname comes out of Virgil's mouth during their very first conversation—look, he hit the 'make Roman rant about fantasy' button, it's not his fault—and sticks like glue. Now every time they see each other, Virgil's throwing an arm over Roman's shoulders and asking him how his kingdom fares, ruffling his hair and teasing him for how red his face gets when he does. He's nearly as rough with him as Remus is, grabbing his sleeve or his arm to get him to notice something, even picking him up bodily around the waist if he needs Roman to move. Which—okay, Roman may be younger than all of them, but it's not like he's small and he's certainly not light. The first time Virgil picked him up like it was nothing he may have had to lean against him for a little longer because…whoa.

Logan, the one who's Remus's age, is also the cause of a fair number of whoas. Because—okay, and this isn't fair —Logan has this habit of calling people pet names when he's distracted by whatever he's doing, and he's always doing something, which means he's distracted a lot, which means when Roman says hello or grabs something for him, he gets called a pet name, and that's not fair because Roman's face is apparently a giant red button that says 'be nice to me' and Logan is—okay, Roman might have asked if he and Remus were dating when they first met and Remus just laughed, saying Logan was just like that with everyone. And it's true! Logan's always pretty polite and soft spoken and genuinely interested in what people have to say, but Logan doesn't call everyone my dear and darling the way he does with Roman, nor does he do the equivalent of getting in on Virgil's joke of pretending they're all part of this fantasy story running a kingdom, nor does tell them to sit next to him and wrap a protective arm around their shoulders when Virgil and Remus are being too mean to him. He doesn't do that with anyone else, and Remus, the jerk, just shrugs and grins and tells him he's got puppy energy too.

The oldest brother, Patton, is even less help. Because he may be the only one fully out of school, but that doesn't give him the right to call Roman kiddo and hug him like he's a proud dad. And Roman is convinced that Remus told them that Roman doesn't have the best relationship with their parents even though he wasn't the one who got kicked out, because every so often Patton will just look at him with a really soft expression and say I'm so proud of you, you know that? And then what is Roman supposed to do, not melt into a puddle of oh-God-am-I-about-to-cry and mumble some excuse to leave the room? There was one time Patton found him crying after a really stressful test and just sat down next to him, wrapped him in his arms, and held him until he felt better. Then he wouldn't let Roman apologize or be embarrassed or anything. They ended up having a movie marathon that night and he'd fallen asleep on him and he'd felt so bad about that because the couch was not the best place to sleep and Patton had just smiled and said you were asleep, kiddo, what was I supposed to do? It's like have a puppy fall asleep on me, I couldn't just wake you up.

Then there's their dad, Mr. Sanders, who'd taken one look at him and said call me Janus, sweetie, and his life was over. Because Janus is an actual dad, not like his father who sniffed and crossed his arms and said Roman was getting too old for silly games and make-believe, no, Janus is as big of a dork as his kids are, chasing after Virgil when he's getting too wild and spending hours talking with Logan about how stupid a plot point is in this show they're watching and baking with Patton like it's all he wants to do. Hell, he even makes a point of showing up to Remus's job just to grab lunch with him on really slow days. Sometimes Roman can't even be in the same room as him because he has this uncanny ability to know when Roman's stressing about something and he will sit down and say hey, sweetie in this really soft voice and sometimes Roman just doesn't have the energy for all of that emotional support.

Safe to say, Roman and Remus have quickly been scooped into this family and that would be totally, 100% fine, if said family were not really big on all things horror and if Roman were not secretly-not-so-secretly the world's biggest scaredy-cat.

They know. They absolutely know. There's no other reason why Virgil would sneak up behind him and scare him all the time. There's no other reason why Logan would describe the most horrifying thing with a pleasant smile on his face until Roman smacks him with a pillow to make him shut up. There's no other reason why Patton would say things like safety in numbers! all the time with a wink. There's no other reason why Janus will sometimes whisper boo right in his ear when he gives him a hug. And Remus is no help, because why would he stop other people teasing Roman for something he never lets Roman live down—that's not true, Remus has punched people in the face before for being mean to Roman, but these guys are at least nice after they make Roman jump out of his skin so he supposes that's it.

So. That's why, when Logan finds out that one of the most haunted locations in the country is right in the next zip code, Roman finds himself in the car, on the way, and maybe-probably-definitely more than a little scared.

***

"A word."

Four of the five heads in the car turn at the sound of Janus's voice. He keeps his eyes on the fifth in the rear view mirror for a moment longer; it had taken them all far too long to reassure Roman that it was alright if he napped for a little as they drove, and now that he was asleep, they all silently agreed to let him for as long as he could. Patton's hand cards gently through his hair, his head resting against Roman's where it rests on his shoulder. Remus has one of his brother's hands in his lap, Virgil holding the other on the other side of Patton.

"Roman is not to be abandoned, locked in, or made to believe he is so," Janus says firmly, "nor will he be made to feel ridiculous for being scared."

They all nod.

"I have no issue with being the no-fun dad and ruining a trick if it goes too far. Roman will not be made to feel as though he cannot trust his own feelings, senses, or judgement. If Roman asks you a question, you will answer it honestly. If he decides we're done, we're done. Is that understood?"

"Yes, Dad."

"Yep."

"I got it."

"How are you giving them the don't-fuck-with-my-brother speech before I can?" Janus just raises an eyebrow and Remus meets it easily. "Yeah, Janny, I got it."

Janus rolls his eyes fondly and glances at Roman's sleeping face one more time before returning his gaze to the road.

***

It's just around sunset when they pull up to the motel, sign flickering in the near-empty parking lot. The red light casts bizarre shadows on the car's hood as they clamber out, Remus and Patton grabbing backpacks out of the trunk as Janus heads to the office to check them in. Roman stares up at the sign. Clouds begin to streak across the darkening horizon. There's not supposed to be a storm tonight. Hopefully this will pass and they'll at least be able to see a li—

"Ah!"

"Sheesh, Princey," Virgil chuckles as Roman smacks his shoulder for grabbing him out of nowhere, "save it for the ghosts, won't you?"

"You're a menace, you know that, right? Ack—Re!"

"Don't you go giving my title out to anyone else," Remus declares as Roman tries to get away from his brother's tickling fingers, "I'm the only one allowed to be your menace."

"Alright, alright, leave him be," Logan says, scooping Roman out of harm's way and tucking him under his arm, "don't give them any ideas."

"Wait, who's 'them?'" Logan just smiles down at him. "Don't just smile coyly at me, Logan, who the hell are you talking about?"

"I have the keys," Janus says as he walks back over, not even raising an eyebrow at his snickering children. "Did you decide how you want to split up the rooms?"

"Me, Ro, and Lo in one," Remus says, taking one of the keys, "and then you three in the other."

"Wait, when did we decide that?"

"We decided it forever ago, Emo, it's not my fault you weren't there."

"Wha—hey! Why do you get to decide when we decide things?"

"Funny you mention that, we decided that too."

"Aw, don't pout, kiddo," Patton teases, ruffling Virgil's hair as he squawks, "it'll be just like when you were younger and used to ask—"

"Okay, we don't need to talk about that," Virgil grumbles, snatching the key from Janus and stomping off toward the room. Patton just rolls his eyes and follows, catching up just in time to trip Virgil as he goes to step up onto the curb. "Hey!"

"Just checking."

"If you don't shut the fuck up—"

"Language, kiddo."

"I'll fucking show you language—"

"Aren't you glad I don't do that?" Remus says as he snags Roman around the waist, dragging him into a partly consensual bear hug. "I'd never trip you, Roro."

"I don't know if you hauling me around like a sack of potatoes is better, Re, I gotta be honest."

"Semantics."

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

Janus chuckles. "The manager said it's only about a fifteen minute drive from here. What's say everyone settles in for about half an hour, then we get back on the road?"

Roman nods. He takes his backpack from Remus and follows Logan into the motel room. Two twin beds, a small couch, a bathroom, and a chest of drawers he takes one look at and decides nope, living out a backpack for the night is gonna be just fine with him. Remus flops down on the bed near the wall and spreads out like a starfish, sighing in contentment. Logan sits on the other, checking something on his phone, before he looks up with a smile and beckons Roman over. Roman goes, sitting next to him.

"Hey," Logan says quietly, "are you alright?"

"Me? Yeah, 'm fine."

"Do you want to know more about where we're going, or would that make things worse?"

"As long as you're just gonna tell me what is actually true about this place and not whatever ghost stories there are about it."

Logan nods. "Well, it's an old trading post that stopped being used when the bigger railway systems got built closer to the river. There are still many of the businesses in the area because they were used by the locals, but as the nearby cities got more and more built up, they became more anachronistic than functional. They have seasonal tours and events in the summer and fall, that's their main source of income beyond the town's central population."

"So where exactly are we going?"

"One of the places rumored to have the most paranormal activity—I know, I know," he says softly when Roman glares at him, "I'm just telling you what they've reported, I'm not going to talk about the ghosts themselves, dear."

It is not fair that the pet name makes him sag into a little Roman puddle leaning against Logan's side, but it does, so he deals with it. "Sorry."

"It's alright, darling. What I was going to say is that one of the main stops on the ghost tours is this old hotel. It was one of the first buildings to be fully closed and boarded up, so it's sat mostly untouched other than brief periods of maintenance just to be sure it won't fall down or become a public safety hazard. Most of the rooms are still pretty well preserved, even some of the original furniture is still in there."

"Oh. That's…kinda cool."

"Mm, I thought so too." Logan puts a hand on his back. "Did that help?"

"Yeah. I think so. Can I—um—are you going to—"

Logan lets him stumble over his words for a few seconds before he chuckles. "Do you want to spend time with me admiring all the cool historical things while the others fool around and scare themselves with ghosts?"

"Hey!" Remus chucks a pillow at them and Logan catches it with one hand. One hand. "You won't be saying that when it gets dark in there."

"Don't terrify your brother, Remus."

"Again: my job to do the shovel talk for my Ro-Bro."

"Well, then don't scare him already. After all," Logan says in a low voice, slowly turning to stare right at Roman, "there will be plenty of time for that later."

Roman can't help it. His shoulders get all tense and he tries to scowl but he's pretty sure it just ends up a pout because Logan chuckles and gives him a hug and whispers it's alright, my dear, I'm only teasing you. He glares at Remus over Logan's shoulder and Remus just grins at him. He may or may not stay nestled into Logan's side as he and Remus start talking about something not related to ghosts and scary things until Janus knocks on their door, telling them it's time to go.

He takes one of the window seats this time, Remus squishing him a little against the door but that's fine. They pull out of the motel parking lot onto a now fully darkened road. A slight chill goes up Roman's arm as he watches the flickering red sign fade into the deep blackness of the clouded sky. He tries to lean subtly into Remus's side and feels Remus reach down to take his hand out of sight of the others.

"So," Patton says, "where're we going, Logan?"

"We're going to the Estie's Inn, the old hotel used by the trading post back when it was still active. The owner says it's one of the most haunted places in the town and that some people who work there refuse to stay past the end of their shifts."

"Really?"

"Yes. Apparently, even people who don't believe in the supernatural at all have reported weird feelings, things going missing in ways they really shouldn't, or thinking there was someone else closing the front when they knew for a fact no one else was in the building." Logan's face glows as his phone screen illuminates the front seat. "One of the managers reports that many times, she's texted the other managers to ask if they're upstairs because she can hear someone walking around even though there's not supposed to be anyone else up there, and every time, they've said they're not even in the building."

Roman squeezes Remus's hand. "Are they supposed to be there tonight?"

"Yes, they're going to let us into the building."

"But are they staying with us?"

"They're not going to come inside, if that's what you're asking," Patton says, "one of my friends at the Historical Society does conservative work here and convinced them to let us explore for a little bit on our own."

"O-oh."

"Don't worry," Virgil says in that tone of voice that does just make Roman worry even more, "at least we'll know we're the only people there, right, Princey?"

"That's not helpful. You know that's not helpful."

The car just snickers at Roman, collectively, because they're all actually the worst. Logan keeps reading stories from people who have been to the hotel and Remus keeps a tight hold of his hand. Roman stares out the window and tries not to think about how he hasn't seen another car the entire time they've been on the road, and they passed the last streetlamp about five streets ago.

When they pull up in front of the hotel, part of Roman wants to say actually, never mind, I would rather be anywhere else, thank you. The building is barely a shadow against the black sky, a monolith of blackness with strange bumps and protrusions that he knows would look like perfectly normal building features in the daylight, but now just give it a strangely ephemeral look that does the opposite of fill him with confidence. As the headlights die and everyone scrambles out of the car, the giddiness rolling off of the others in waves does nothing to dull the cocktail of anxiety building in Roman's gut. He clings to Remus's hand and Remus gives it one good squeeze before letting go. His eyes rove over the faded sign, cheeriness of Welcome to Estie's Inn cracking and peeling in the dim light of several flashlights. Distantly, he hears Janus and Patton talking to the person waiting for them in their own car—they weren't even waiting inside? I thought this place was safe—and watching the red taillights vanish up the road.

"Roman?" He startles, turning to see Janus holding out a flashlight. He frowns. "Did you bring another coat?"

"What? Oh, uh, no, I, um, I think I'll be fine. We'll be inside, right?"

Janus gives him a skeptical look, but he nods and gestures for him to follow the others inside. They've got the door open and—no. Oh, no. No, no, thank you, Roman is not going to go into a door that's just blackness. Even the others are hesitating, shining their flashlights in just enough to see stairs leading upwards to another door.

A breeze rustles the trees.

"Well, fuck it." Virgil strides inside, faltering only briefly at the threshold before going up the stairs to the second door. "Patton, which key is it?"

"It's the, um, the one with the red tag." Patton goes up the stairs after Virgil and now everyone's going in. Janus steps around Roman to get inside and now he's the last one on the stoop.

He glances behind himself. The night has fully settled over them. The car seems far more than a measly three paces away, out beyond the shadow of the hotel and in the clutches of the parking lot. The breeze rustles the trees again. Something flickers out of the corner of his eye and he flicks on the flashlight, trying to see what it was.

"Roman?" He turns at the sound of Janus's voice. "Are you coming in?"

"Y-yeah, yeah, I'm coming."

He closes the door behind himself and tries not to flinch at how he has to tug to make sure it closes properly. Janus has waited at the bottom of the stairs for him and gently encourages him up with a hand on his shoulder. He tries not to lean into the touch and fails miserably—he's starting to sense a theme here—and by the time they manage to get all the way up the stairs, everyone else has already split up to roam the rooms.

Great.

***

It's after Roman clings to the doorway with paint coming off under his fingernails that he sets his jaw and walks over. Patton raises his eyebrows in a silent 'you okay?' Roman meets his gaze for barely a second before he looks away, standing next to him and wrapping his arms around himself and…alright, he's not too proud to admit he goes soft when Roman keeps edging slowly toward him as though Patton won't notice if he moves slow enough.

"I won't bite," he says quietly, suppressing a chuckle when Roman startles anyway. He opens an arm and crooks a finger. "You need a cuddle?"

"I'm okay, but thank you."

"Do you want a cuddle, kiddo?"

Roman's head hangs for a moment before he leans into Patton's side. The chuckle comes out in full force at how much Roman's pouting about it. Of course, then a door bangs shut and he jerks, clinging to Patton's sleeve.

"Who the fuck did that?"

"Not me!"

"No, wait, I really didn't do that, who was that?"

Patton shakes his head and squeezes Roman closer. He steps away a moment later but shyly reaches back for Patton's hand with a truly worrying color red at the tips of his ears. The poor thing's been getting jumpier and jumpier as the night goes on. He takes Roman's and squeezes it tight. His dad glances over a moment later, gaze flicking down to see their joined hands. A smile touches the corners of his mouth and Patton shakes his head—don't—and his dad silently 'awws' and lets it be.

***

Roman's had enough of this, actually.

He's not going to tell anyone that, because he can see how much fun they're all having even though they're scared at shit too—and they don't even pretend that they're not scared, they actually enjoy being scared, which is wild—but he's…he's done.

The shadows keep moving. He swears there's something else here. He can feel it. The way your whole body just knows when there's something right behind you and he keeps turning around and there's nothing there. None of the others are even trying to scare him anymore, they're not sneaking up behind him, they're not jumping out from doors, no, they're all also terrified and this room that he's in right now is not helping, the darkness has a physical weight to it, pressing in on him until he feels like he's gonna stop breathing. He needs to leave. He needs to get out of this room. He goes and turns the knob and—

The knob doesn't turn.

The knob doesn't fucking turn.

"G-guys?" His voice comes out all thin and shaky. "Guys, can you let me out?"

"Roman? Are you in here?" The knob rattles. "Oh, it's stuck. Here, let me—stand back, okay?"

Roman takes a few steps back and the door busts open with a thud, revealing Logan on the other side with his flashlight. "L-Logan?"

"There, it must've gotten stuck, here, come out of there." He opens an arm and goes to pull Roman closer only to hiss in surprise. "Oh, you poor darling, you're freezing."

Is he? Roman's just sort of not been taking stock of his body for a little. But then Logan's hand brushes his face and he whimpers and then everyone hears it and they're already calling out to ask what's wrong and this was not the plan, but then Logan's calling out Dad, your baby's cold, and Roman wants to say no, it's fine, he's fine—

"What was that?" Janus is already walking towards them, undoing the front of his coat. "Baby's cold?"

Roman hangs his hand, hands shoved under his arms. "Y-you were right about the coat, I'm sorry, I should've listened."

Logan moves away and he tries not to flinch about it but then he sees something big and shadowy moving toward him and he does flinch at that only to realize that was Janus reaching for him and he looks up to see a hurt expression on his face and he's messed up, he's messed up—

"Come snuggle, sweetie," Janus murmurs, "I'm not going to hurt you."

"N-no, I know, I'm sorry, I don't know why I d-did that—"

"Shh-shh-shh, it's okay, sweetie, I'm not mad at you. Not about that, not about the coat…" Janus sweeps him into a cuddle and oh, he's so warm… "Even little space heaters get cold sometimes, let me warm you up a little bit, alright?"

Roman sniffles. He doesn't mean to, but he's cold. He's cold and he's scared. Janus lets out a soft noise and rubs his back.

"Hey," he whispers, too low for anyone else to hear, "are you doing okay? I know this is really scary, you're doing so well, sweetie."

"It's fine, 'm fine, 'm just…having a moment."

"That's okay, you can take as much of a moment as you need. You want to go have a moment in the car?"

"No, no, we can't split up, I don't want to leave them here."

Janus chuckles, kissing his forehead—wait, what? Janus—did Janus just kiss his forehead? Why? What—what's going on?

"Sweetie? Did you hear me?"

"What? S-sorry, no, I—no, I didn't, what did you say?"

Janus pulls back to look at him, concern playing openly on his features, letting out another soft noise as a gloves thumb brushes something from his cheek. Oh. He's crying. He's so scared he's crying. He opens his mouth to say something like it's fine again but all that comes out is a sob, and then Remus appears over Janus's shoulder like he's a ghost.

"Roro?" Ah. He's unlocked Remus's soft-and-protective-big-brother mode. "Oh, hey, hey, Roro, shh, c'mere—c'mere, Roro, I gotcha. I'm here, I'm right here."

He gets bundled into Remus's arms with his nose pressed into the crook of Remus's neck and he can't help it, he closes his eyes and lets himself sniffle into his brother's coat. Remus holds him with a fierce grip and Jnaus just rests his hand on his shoulder.

"Let's be done. We're done, okay? This place blows anyway, there's no WiFi and no way to see outside, right? Let's get out of here," Remus murmurs, warm breath blowing over Roman's cold cheeks. "Let's get to the car and I'll snuggle you all the way back to the motel, okay?"

Roman sniffles and nods, and only after he manages to pry his head up from Remus's shoulder does he realize that the rest of them are already gathered around, each with different worried expressions on their faces. Remus doesn't quite march him down the stairs, it's too tender for that, but he does practically haul Roman into his lap for the car ride home and keeps his arms around him the whole time. Remus is big and soft and warm and safe and Roman can't bring himself to feel too bad about the way he clings to him until that red light flickers over the car again.

He does manage to walk back to their motel room, just because he's not going to indulge Remus's desire to figure out if he can still carry Roman like that right now, and doesn't even manage to get his coat all the way off before Remus has all but tackled him onto the bed and kisses his hair.

"What happened?" he hears Virgil ask as they follow them in.

"He got stuck in one of the rooms," Logan says back, concern dripping from every word, "the doorknob was faulty."

"Oh, fuck, that's terrifying. Yeah, we should—Pat, do they know about that?"

"I'm texting my friend right now."

"Hey, Princey," Virgil says softly, coming to sit next to them, running his fingers through Roman's hair, "it's over now. We're outta there. And Pat's gonna make sure that doesn't happen to anyone else, okay? It's all gonna be fine."

"I'm s-sorry we had to—to go so early—"

"Shut the fuck up, Roro," Remus says sweetly, "you being okay is way more important than whatever fucking dickbag ghosts are in that place."

"Remus will punch through the veil to avenge you," Logan agrees, "this is true."

"Where's—where's—"

"Dad's just grabbing our stuff from the other room," Virgil says quickly before Roman gets all worked up, "we're all gonna stay in here tonight, figured that'd be a good idea. 'Cause then he doesn't have to feel guilty about waking up in the middle of the night and sneaking over here to make sure you're okay."

"I heard that," comes Janus's voice as the door opens again, "and just for that, Virgil, you get to help me with the mattress."

"Fine," Virgil grouses, heaving himself up off the bed like this is some huge chore as Roman frowns against Remus's shoulder.

"Mattress?"

"You didn't think Emo was exaggerating when he said they're all staying here, right?"

"B-but—are we allowed to do—to do that?"

"I spoke with the manager," comes Janus's gentle voice, "and told her my son got scared and if it would be alright. She said it was perfectly fine as long as we put the mattress back when we leave and let her know."

Roman's brain stutters to a halt.

My son.

"R-Re?"

"Yeah, Roro?"

"Did—did we get a new family and you didn't—didn't tell me?"

There's a pause, then Remus chuckles and squeezes him so, so tight. "Oh, Roro, you're so fucking precious, it's gonna kill me."

Because yes, it turns out. They've got a whole new family. A family that squeezes into a motel room and watches stupid cartoons on Logan's tablet until they all fall asleep, a family that makes a protective nest of blankets and bodies around their youngest when he gets scared and cries, a family that promises the next thing they do together will be to explore that new shopping mall that opened in the opposite direction.

"Just as long as no one stumbles into the Backrooms, we'll be fine."

"Remus, shut the fuck up."

"Language!"

"If someone could hit Patton with a pillow, that would be great, thank you…"

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#dragonbabbles #fic #sanders sides #roman sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #janus sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders

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