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just-here-for-the-moment · 3 years

Note

FRIEND!!

May I humbly request Pero Tovar and "every inch of you is the most beautiful thing God ever created."

Heat level up to you.

Thankyou!

YES!! You absolutely may request it, and I hope that you're okay with me turning it into Part 2 of The Innkeeper's Daughter, because, damn... I'm loving that man!!

The Innkeeper's Daughter, Part 2

One MILLION "thank yous" to @fandom-blackhole who let me take inspiration from This Ask for the original Anon and This follow-up Ask from me, and let me run wild with the premise of Pero Tovar falling in love with a woman who works at an inn.

The Innkeeper’s Daughter, Part 2

Part 1

Word count: 3000+

Rating: Explicit, 18+ only

Outline: Pero Tovar x “You” (OC cis/het female reader, “blank canvas”/no physical description/no use of “Y/N”)

Warnings: Reader’s first time (but this is NOT meant to be a ‘virgin kink’ fic); mature and vulgar language; euphemisms; slow-burn; Pero Tovar being super sexy and caring; kissing; vaginal fingering; oral sex/F receiving; unprotected P/V sex; a little bit of morning-after insecurity on Reader’s part

You broke the kiss and leaned your head back against the wall, breathing heavily and thoughts running wild. Pero’s face was still so new to you, up close. You were learning to read him better. His stony scowl seemed to make up the bulk of his expressions, and other than the pure hatred and anger that had twisted his face after the other man had called you a ‘whore,’ he only seemed to have a softer version of the scowl. On anyone else you would have called it a frown, but on Pero it practically registered as a glow.

You looked up into his eyes as he brought one of his broad thumbs to your cheek to sweep away a tear.

“I have to finish serving the customers. I can’t leave Father alone on a Saturday night.” You kissed him again, and then another before you found the strength to pull yourself away again. “But I want to see you tonight. After I’m done.”

Pero nodded and tilted your chin up with his calloused fingers. “Tonight. I will come to your room.” He kissed you deeply, then scattered a trail of kisses up your nose to your forehead. He pressed his lips to the top of your head and then murmured. “Until then, mi alma.”

You broke the embrace reluctantly, steadying yourself with a sigh as you walked away, smoothing your apron down. You looked back once at Pero where he stood at the end of the hall. His face looked soft, and the hint of a smile tugged at one corner of his mouth as he gazed at you. You fought the urge to abandon your post and run back to him, and you lifted your fingers in a little wave as you re-entered the barroom.

Thankfully all of the guests had returned to their own affairs, resuming their raucous drinking and eating, the bar brawl entirely forgotten. Your father looked at you with an arched eyebrow and you smiled and shook your head, reassuring him that you were fine. You busied yourself with attending to customers, tucking coins into your pockets and ferrying empty plates and mugs to the kitchen.

Your chest ached every time you inhaled, desperate for the evening to end, to see if Pero would fulfill his promise of coming to your room. You weren’t nervous, far from it - you were eager and willing and excited. You weren’t a high-born lady, required to keep her maidenhead intact in order to form an alliance with some prince. You just hadn’t had the opportunity yet. None of the young men in the village had been interesting enough for you to want to steal away to a hayloft or secluded part of the forest with. But Pero… he was different. Mysterious and well-traveled, closed-off until he had bared his soul to you in the back passage. You were ready, well past an age where you could make up your own mind, and you had said yes, grasped the opportunity to lay with a man who excited you.

You weren’t sure exactly what would happen after tonight, whether Pero would stay in the village or leave, ask you to come along with him or insist that you stay put. You dared not think too far ahead, letting your immediate tasks occupy you as the conversations of the guests flowed, filling your head with a buzz that blessedly distracted you from the clenching and throbbing in your gut.

Finally, after what seemed like eons, the last customers dribbled out of the door, laughing and shouting their way down the lane. You washed the final stack of dishes, wiped the tables, and handed Father the last of the coins from your pocket. Your beaded brow had nothing to do with the exertion of your labor, and everything to do with thoughts of the handsome Spaniard who had promised you a visit.

You fairly flew to your room at the top of the stairs, discarding your soiled apron and dress. You poured fresh water into your basin, adding a few dried summer wildflowers from the sachet in your drawer, and used part of a cake of fine soap that Father had gifted you at Christmas. It was nothing like the exquisite ointments or fancy perfumes that ladies used, but when you were done your face and body were scrubbed clean, and you were certain that Pero would be enamored of your efforts. He had noticed your dress, after all.

You donned your cleanest nightdress and then hesitated. Should you get into bed, or sit in your side chair? You decided to tuck yourself under the covers and read for a bit by the lamp. You heard no noises from the rest of the house, though you listened with eager ears, only half-attentive to your book. Time dragged on interminably. Just as you were growing a bit drowsy, you heard a tap at your door. Your pulse raced and you swung your legs out of bed, dashing the few steps to the door.

“Who is it?” You whispered.

“Pero, mi alma.”

You swung the door open, beaming up at him. You reached one hand out to take his and pulled him into the room, almost not believing that he had come. But as you closed the door and he crowded you against it to kiss you again, you sunk into the reality of it. He was here, he was real, he was yours.

You felt a sense of urgency, the desire to pull him into your bed immediately and get right to lovemaking. But you fought against the urge to hurry, tried to memorize every one of Pero’s kisses as he held you tight between him and the door, one large arm wrapped around your waist while the other cupped your jaw tenderly. You found yourself almost whimpering as he kissed you, his tongue sweeping your mouth with passion. This was heaven. If this is how men made love, you could get used to this.

At length, Pero pulled away from you, gazing deep into your eyes. “Mi alma… you are a maiden, yes?”

You nodded, feeling suddenly shy. He had guessed as much in the hall downstairs, telling you that he would show you everything you needed to know, show you how to please a man. Now that it was a matter of actual discussion, your lack of experience felt like a burden. Would you be able to please him? Would he still be in love with you if you were clumsy or awkward?

Pero tilted your chin up and spoke low, serious in tone. “I will be gentle. It may hurt at first, but after that you will feel great pleasure. I will make sure of it.”

You breathed a sigh of relief, realizing that Pero’s question wasn’t meant to embarrass you, but rather to ensure that you would be comfortable and safe. Your shyness ebbed away, replaced by a glowing pride that you had chosen such a careful man to be your first.

“I trust you, Pero. I am ready.” You smiled and leaned up to kiss him once more. He stepped back and you took his hand to lead him to your bed. He sat on the edge and you paused for a moment.

“Should I put the lamp out?”

Pero shook his head, that gentle smile tugging at the corner of his mouth once more. “No, mi alma. Leave it lit. I want to see you.”

And there was that eagerness again, your heart pounding against your ribs as Pero took your hand and pulled you to stand between his knees where he sat. He placed both hands on your hips and gazed up at you with the same expression of hunger that you had seen on his face downstairs when he professed his love in the passageway. A quiet moment stretched long and sacred between you.

Pero dropped his hands to the hem of your nightdress and lifted it, looking up at you for permission. You nodded and he pulled it higher, skating the material against your thighs and hips, until it reached your waist. You took the fabric in your hands and lifted it up and off your head, dropping it on the floor at the foot of the bed. You felt as if you should be shy, but you couldn’t find it in yourself. The way that Pero gazed at you, the way his hands stroked from your thighs to your hips to your waist, the fact that you could see his erection straining against the thin material of his trousers - it made you feel powerful and special.

Pero wrapped one of his hands around to cup your butt, bringing you closer against him. You draped your hands over his strong shoulders. He cupped one breast and brought his mouth to the nipple, licking and then suckling against you, his tongue hot against your skin. You felt desire stirring, a throbbing between your legs that mirrored your heartbeat. You tangled your fingers in his hair and moaned softly.

“Oh, Pero. That feels wondrous.”

He let go of your ass and brought his hand to your front, softly stroking your thigh and nudging your legs apart. He cupped his hand there, holding it firmly against your sex, and you nearly wailed at the sensation, the delicious contrast of Pero working his mouth at the same time that his hand was touching you so intimately.

You closed your eyes and threw your head back, feeling his fingers explore you. He stroked your center softly with his largest finger, bringing wetness forth and then pushing it back between your folds. You felt your pleasure building, something below your navel twisting itself higher. Then Pero’s finger found your sensitive bud and he began circling it, building the pressure until you felt the dam burst. You brought the back of your hand up to your mouth and stifled a moan as you felt your cunt throb and quiver, stealing your breath and sending your head reeling.

As the sensation began to slow, you felt Pero stroke you again and then insert his finger up into your folds. It felt amazing, like it belonged there. He probed you gently and then pushed it further in. You felt the breath return to your lungs and then you looked down at him. He released his mouth from your breast and placed a kiss to your stomach.

“Is this alright, mi alma? Am I hurting you?”

You shook your head. “No, Pero. It felt good. It feels good.”

He smiled and then released you. “Lay down for me.”

You lay in the center of your small bed, looking up at him expectantly as he stripped his tunic off. You nearly gasped at his beauty, his golden skin marred by scars, his broad shoulders muscled after hours and hours of fighting. And when he peeled his pants down from his narrow hips, you were astonished at his cock, bobbing proudly up and erect. You wondered again at your lack of shyness, finding only that you felt womanly, proud of the way that his body was making his desire for you so apparent.

Pero kneeled on the bed next to you and surprised you by peppering kisses across both of your ankles and shins. His soft scruff tickled your skin, and you giggled at the sensation of it.

You reached a hand out to touch his shoulder. “Pero, what are you doing?”

He paused and looked at you, "Every inch of you is the most beautiful thing God ever created." Pero laid a kiss to one kneecap and then the other, continuing his trail up your thighs. “It would be a grave sin if I failed to worship every inch of you with my lips, mi alma.”

He kissed across your belly and ribs, your arms and breasts, and finally came to a stop at your lips. When you tangled your fingers in his hair, he brought his hand once again to stroke your sex, bringing a moan from you that he matched with his own deep growl.

He pulled away and positioned himself near your knees.

“Open your legs for me. I want to kiss you there, mi alma.”

You smiled at Pero and shifted your knees apart, watching his face grow darker with lust as your legs fell open. He whispered a few words in his native Spanish and licked his lips before leaning down. The first laps of his tongue were gentle, and you watched him close his eyes in satisfaction. His tongue grew more insistent, and you soon closed your own eyes, biting your lip to keep quiet as you tossed your head back in ecstasy.

Pero worked his tongue across your sensitive bundle of nerves, pausing only to insert two fingers into you before he continued to lick you with vigor. You felt your climax building again. With a few strokes of his fingers inside of you, Pero brought you to the precipice before your pleasure overtook you, throwing you over the edge as you clenched hard around his thick fingers.

When you opened your eyes, you found him gazing up at you, lazily stroking your hip before dipping his head to place a kiss there.

He shifted himself to kneel between your legs, stroking his proud length a few times. You looked up at him through your haze of desire, reaching your arms up to circle around his neck where he leaned over you. He dipped his head to kiss you once.

“Open your legs very wide for me, hmm?”

You nodded and propped your feet wide apart, knees bent up. You felt Pero position himself against your folds, then a slight pressure as he entered you, stopping just inside. He searched your face as you took two deep breaths and nodded up at him, encouraging him to continue. He slotted his mouth against yours, tongue working deep into you as he slid his cock inside of you the rest of the way. You inhaled sharply through your nose as Pero continued to kiss you. It did feel painful, but the feeling lessened as he moved inside of you and back out.

Pero pressed his forehead against yours. “Are you alright, mi alma? The first time is the worst. After this you will only feel pleasure.”

“I’m alright, Pero,” you whispered. “It did hurt but it’s getting better. Keep going, my love.”

He kissed you again and kept his pace even, thrusting into you again and again. As the pain ebbed away you started to feel another pressure building, and this time you knew what would happen when the dam broke.

You closed your eyes and let the feeling of Pero’s cock brushing against your sensitive bud carry you into your third climax. At the first throb and clench, Pero buried himself deep and stayed there, reaching one hand down to thumb at your clit. The thrumming in your core intensified, and a deep groan issued from Pero’s throat at the feeling of you squeezing around him. This third climax was the best one yet, slow and steady, and you felt it from your scalp to your toes. You wanted it to last forever, and you were sad when it burned itself out with a whisper.

Pero kissed you deeply, then nudged your chin up with his nose to place kisses along the column of your throat.

“Better, mi alma?”

“Yes,” you whispered. “So good.”

Pero hummed against your skin and then thrust into you a handful of times more before he unsheathed himself and sat back on his heels. His face was intense, almost a scowl as he stroked himself to completion, catching his spend in his open palm.

He unfolded his legs and crossed to your basin, wiping his hand on your damp linen washcloth before coming back to where you lay on the bed.

“Do you want me to stay, or to go, mi alma?”

You sat up and reached a hand out to him. “Please stay.”

The next day dawned bright and sunny, the light from the thin curtains streaming across your face. You smiled at the warmth of it, mirrored by the warmth of Pero’s bulk pressed against your back, his solid arm slung over your midsection. Were it not for waking to his presence, last night might have been a dream.

You rolled over to face him, finding his face relaxed. You pressed a kiss to his soft mouth.

“Pero,” you whispered. “Wake up.”

He cracked one eye open and grunted at you. You laughed softly and kissed him again.

“Was I good?” You whispered to him. “Last night, I mean? Were you happy?”

Pero opened both eyes in surprise and regarded you with confusion. “Yes, mi alma. But why are you asking me that?”

You felt a bit shy but answered him honestly. “I was worried. I thought that if I was not experienced at coupling with you, that you- well… you might not be pleased, and you would fall out of love with me.”

Pero sat up and pulled you to rest against his chest. You heard his heart beating and closed your eyes. He would not be doing this if he were displeased. He would not have stayed the night with you.

“I told you in the passageway, mi alma, that I had fallen in love with you. But that was not the truth.”

Your breath caught in your throat. If that was a lie, then why had he come to you in the night? Why had he done those things with you?

Pero continued, “The truth is that I fell even more in love with you last night, when you gave yourself to me so openly and let me bring you pleasure. If you will let me, I will spend the rest of my life between your legs, mi alma. I want nothing more than to pleasure you every day for the rest of my life.”

Tears sprang to your eyes. Was he proposing marriage?

“Pero, I-”

“Mi alma, if you will have me, I want to be your husband.”

You drew your head back and looked up into his deep brown eyes. His face was the most open and relaxed you had ever seen it, the scowl entirely wiped from his visage.

“Yes, Pero. Yes.”

He released a breath you didn’t realize he had been holding, and then Pero rolled you down into the sheets to kiss you with abandon.

---

Pero Tovar character masterlist

Main Masterlist

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#pedro stories #pedrostories #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #pero tovar x you #pero tovar x reader #pero tovar fic #pero tovar fanfic #pero tovar fanfiction #the great wall fic #the great wall fanfic #the great wall fanfiction

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sailorkamino · 3 years

Text

Spa Day

Written in the Stars masterlist

relationship: Stucky x reader

word count: 1.3k

chapter summary: Steve goes on a mission, you and Bucky have a spa day (aka Bucky is spoiled/pampered like he deserves)

warnings: none, domestic fluff, shy bucky

Steve hugs you from behind as you make eggs, burying his face in your neck. You grin as his blonde hair tickles your cheek, sleepy Steve is just so adorable. Mango whines, bumping against his leg, obviously ready for her own breakfast. Steve reluctantly lets go of you, “alright, alright, I’m getting your food.”

She prances to her bowl, tail wagging happily as Steve fills it up, but Kiwi is nowhere in sight. He frowns, looking at her green dish, “hey sweetheart, have you seen the cat?”

Just then Bucky emerges from his room, the calico walking between his legs. His long hair in a loose bun with pieces framing his face, the beard he grew out while hiding in Romania looks exceptionally soft this morning. But the cherry on top is he’s wearing the shirt and sweatpants you got him.

When Steve told you that your other soulmate was moving in you were ecstatic and decided to do a little shopping, you went ahead and ordered him new clothes, underwear, socks, toiletries/self care products, and a smartphone. You might have splurged a little but with your and Steve’s bank account you could afford it and after everything Bucky has been through, you wanted to spoil him a little.

You already set his phone up and put the numbers of everyone on the team, but you were so tired you forgot to give it to him last night. You plan to surprise him with it today.

Steve smirks, looking at the cat slinking into the kitchen, “there she is, I think you’re her new favorite, Buck.”

You hold back the comment on Bucky being good with pussy. Too soon. You clear your throat, “good morning, handsome. Take a seat.”

He smiles shyly, sitting down so you can serve him. “Thank you, doll.”

You grin at his low morning voice, “of course. Steve and I like to cook for each other before a big mission, it’s kind of a tradition.”

Bucky looks at Steve playfully, “since when can you cook?”

The blonde huffs, sitting down with a cup of coffee, “I took some classes.”

You giggle behind your own mug, “he took a senior citizen class.”

Steve blushes at Bucky’s loud laugh. “I didn’t know it was a senior class at the time, and why are you laughing!? You’re older than me, jerk!”

‎⍟ ✪ ‎⍟ ✪ ‎⍟ ✪

After breakfast and kissing Steve goodbye, Bucky promptly cleaned the table, telling you to go rest. He begins to wash the dishes, being extra careful with his metal hand, afraid of breaking them. He obviously has great control of the prosthetic and can be extremely gentle. You wish he realized his arm isn’t just a weapon.

Personally, you think the arm is hot. A part of you wants to tell Bucky because the man needs some confidence, but another part of you feels like it would seem insensitive and/or creepy. You imagine the conversation going something like, 'hey, you know that thing Nazi's attached to you without your consent that was used to kill people? Yeah, I think it's super sexy.'

You’re so lost in your thoughts you don’t notice Bucky finishing up the dishes. You jump when he suddenly sits beside you on the couch, blinking at him in shock. (You’re supposed to be a professional assassin, honestly, this is embarrassing.) He raises his brow at you but before he could ask anything you announce, “I have a surprise for you.”

He attempts to tell you that you’ve already done too much for him, more than he deserves, but you were already dashing to your and Steve’s bedroom. When you come back with an excited look on your face, hiding something behind your back, any argument dies in his throat.

You grin, handing him the rectangular box. He looks at it curiously, feeling the weight of it as he slowly opens it. He blinks in shock at the sleek smartphone.

“Do you like it? This way you can stay in touch with Steve and I when we go on missions.” You ask, looking at him with big hopeful eyes

He pulls it out carefully with his flesh hand, afraid of breaking it - no, he refuses to break something from you. “It’s great, doll, but… I don’t really know how to use it.”

You smile playfully, “who do you think taught Steve everything he knows?”

‎⍟ ✪ ‎⍟ ✪ ‎⍟ ✪

After setting up his phone and sending Steve a very chaotic selfie Bucky makes an offhand comment about needing a haircut. You offer to take him to a barber but he practically curled in on himself at the thought of letting a stranger that close to him with a blade. You shrug, “well I could give you a haircut, I mean, I trim Stevie’s hair sometimes.”

You meet his gaze, “well, only if you’re comfortable of course.” He shows a small smile, “that sounds good, thank you, princess.”

Your lips quirk up at the new nickname, but notice that he’s still a little tense. “How about we have a little spa day? To help you relax.”

He looks at you in confusion, “spa day?”

“Yeah, it’s all about self care. Stay right here, I’ll get the hair mask.”

He frowns, not liking the idea of a mask. When you come back in the living room though you only have a brush and a jar of yellowish cream. You show him the container, “this will make your hair super soft and healthy, is it ok if I use this on you?”

He studies the substance for a moment before nodding. You grin, placing a pillow on the floor and letting him sit in between your legs. You start an episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine for him to watch, grabbing the brush. “Ok, tell me if I hurt you.”

He tenses up, ready for the pain, but nothing. Just your fingers smoothing his hair and a light pulling. He begins to relax, this isn’t so bad. Then he hears you open the jar, “ok, time for the hair mask.”

When you start massaging his scalp he goes pilant, a content sigh escaping his lips. He didn’t know someone touching his hair could feel this good, usually he doesn’t like people anywhere near his head but he might have to make an exception. Only for you and Stevie though.

You grin, lightly scratching his head, receiving a happy sound in response. You can’t help but smirk, the former Winter Soldier, the world's most prolific assassin, is just a big puppy.

“Alright, we have about 20 minutes before this needs to be washed out, then I can trim your hair. How does that sound?”

He hums in response, eyes shut as he relaxes into your touch. After his shower, he calls you into the bathroom for his haircut.

“Look at you! So handsome,” you praise, running your fingers through Bucky’s wet locks. He blushes, looking at his slightly shorter hair in the mirror, the once dead ends now silky soft and smelling of vanilla.

“Thank you, doll. You did great.”

You smirk, “well with a face like that any haircut would look good.”

He smiles shyly, looking at his lap. You brush any trimmings off his shoulder, “well let’s finish our spa day, shall we? We have a facetime date with Stevie tonight.”

He furrows his brow, “facetime?”

You hum, “it’s a video call. We’re gonna eat dinner together, what do you want by the way?”

He bites his lip, “whatever you want is fine.”

You grin at his sweetness, pressing a kiss to the top of his head without thinking. “Alright, I’ll order a pizza, how does that sound?” You ask, leaving the bathroom to retrieve your phone.

He looks in the mirror, a goofy smile on his face, his head still tingling from your soft lips. “Great, princess.”

___

next part

taglist: @spookyparadisesheep @moonstuffsteve @thatcrackheadsadbitchtm @officialfictionalwreck @rowenaravenclaw2-blog @lets--be-honest @aikeia @mikariell95 @bananapipedreams @mollygetssherlockcoffee

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #stucky #stucky x reader #steve x bucky #steve x bucky x reader

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lick-me-lennon22 · 3 years

Text

Trans Man!Reader X Beatles headcanons/How they'd support a trans (FTM) partner + help them through dysphoria 💙💙💙

(lengthy title, I know ^^' this amazing request is from @anonymous-blanket ! they originally asked for how the Beatles would help a trans [FTM] reader through dysphoria, but I sort of expanded it to add general headcanons- I hope you don't mind :) 💞)

⚠️⚠️⚠️DISCLAIMERS:⚠️⚠️⚠️

- I myself am a cis woman and this is solely based on the experiences my trans guy friends have been so kind as to share with me, as well as some of my own research on gender dysphoria and grounding techniques

- this is NOT entirely accurate to the 60s or 70s

- I have written these with the assumption that the reader has already come out and has transitioned or is currently transitioning; with that being said, none of the lads would ever out you or disclose your identity before you are ready to do so yourself/without your permission!

- all of the boys would respect your identity and address you by your name and preferred pronouns !!!

- please feel free to (kindly) correct me if any of this post is offensive or incorrect! I have written these headcanons with nothing but love and respect for the trans community ♡

Paul:

when you come out to Paul (if you were together before you began your transition), he's so proud of you for being your authentic self and so glad you're willing to share something like that with him

he immediately offers to take you out shopping and buy you a more masculine/comfortable wardrobe, as well as items such as boxers and binders if you want them

whenever you're up for it, Paul does your eyebrows and some masc contouring (if you ever want him to)- he's quite good with makeup, as he often does his own!

along with (of course) using your correct name and preferred pronouns, he showers you with gender-affirming nicknames and compliments ("my handsome man," "my prince," "dashing," "Adonis," etc.)

if you ever feel dysphoric about sitting down to pee, Paul reminds you that he also pees sitting down (hc)- "It's just more comfortable that way, no shame in it," he shrugs

he makes it a point to remind you how strong and handsome you are often

if you're having a particularly bad day and your dysphoria feels suffocating:

Paul respects your boundaries if you want to be left alone or don't want to be touched

he stays close to you and holds your hand if/as soon as you're okay with it

he tries to take your mind off of your discomfort and ground you by serenading you with your favorite songs

he listens attentively if you just want to vent, and gives you plenty of reassurance and words of comfort/validation if you need them

Paul reminds you that however you want to present is valid and that you are still, of course, a man- regardless of idiots who may tell you otherwise

"How can you not look like a man...? You are a man, love" ♡

John:

when you come out to John (if you were together before you began your transition), he talks you through everything you're feeling and listens intently when you share your experience with him

he suggests going to therapy if you feel like it'd be beneficial (he attends therapy sessions as well- hc)

he immediately assures you that he'll beat the living daylights out of anyone who dares to deadname or misgender you

John (without an ounce of subtlety) corrects anybody who uses the wrong pronouns to refer to you

he makes sure you know and always remember that your identity is valid

if you're comfortable with it, John places pride pins on his leather and denim jackets- regardless of the comments people make

he will absolutely go off on bigoted and closed-minded interviewers/reporters who question your identity or your relationship

John accompanies you into the men's restroom if you're nervous (and if you want him to) and will tell off/uppercut anyone who even looks at you the wrong way

if you're having a particularly bad day and your dysphoria feels suffocating:

John reminds you that your body doesn't dictate your gender and that your identity is 100% valid

he offers his clothes for you to wear if that would make you more comfortable

he helps ground you and distract you from your discomfort by putting on a silly movie for you to watch (together, if you'd like)

John carries his/your cat into your bedroom and places them in your lap for cuddles and purrs

he reminds you of what a hot, sexy stud you are ;)

"A... woman?? That's the dumbest thing I've ever 'eard. You can't 'look like a woman,' you ain't one- you're a man, love"

John tells you he can't wait until the day you become his husband ♡

George:

when you come out to George (if you were in a relationship before you began your transition), he sits patiently and listens as you share your feelings and experience with him

on his next trip out to the store, he buys doubles of all the masculine-scented hygiene products he usually purchases (body wash, deodorant, shampoo, etc.), as well as some extra boxers in your size in case you'd want them

when he arrives back home, he wordlessly places the items in your shared bathroom/dresser so you have access to all of them, but won't have to ask if you aren't comfortable enough to yet

he's very mindful about using your correct name and pronouns from the moment you come out to him

George supports you if you're on T and gives you daily reminders, or advocates for you if you aren't and want to be

he supports you equally if you don't want to start T at all!

he reminds you that your presentation doesn't invalidate your identity

he refers to you as "my boyfriend" or "my man," and tells you that you look sexy, dashing, and handsome ;)

if you're having a particularly bad day and your dysphoria feels suffocating:

George respects whatever you want to do and makes sure you're as comfy as possible if you just want to stay holed up in your bedroom for a while

he fetches you some comfy, baggy clothes in case you feel like disappearing into them for a bit, and offers you some of his clothes if you'd prefer them

he'll bring your pet into your room for some extra love and cuddle time

George will be considerate of your boundaries if you don't want to be touched, but stay by your side if you'll allow him

he's taught you how to meditate and will practice meditation with you as a grounding/relaxation strategy

"Remember, darling- your body doesn't dictate your gender. You are a man no matter what" ♡

Ringo:

when you come out to Ringo (if you were in a relationship before you began your transition), he is elated and relieved that you feel comfortable enough to share something like that with him

the next time you leave the house without Ringo, by the time you've arrived back home, he's set your entire dining room up like a gender reveal party: complete with an It's a Boy! banner and everything blue he could find (it's overkill, but he means well)

on the table is a care package he's bought and assembled for you

in it, he's included plenty of masc-scented soap/deoderant/shampoo, boxers, a pricey and great-quality binder (if you've expressed that you want to bind), and a very thoughtful handwritten and decorated card

from then on and if/when you're ready, Ringo makes a point of (re)introducing you to everyone (and I mean everyone) as his boyfriend- you both love the sound of it!

he'll give you the most genuine, validating compliments out of nowhere

for example: the first time you watch your favorite show together after you've come out to him, Ringo admits that he's always thought you looked/sounded a lot like one of the main characters (who happens to be male)

if you're having a particularly bad day and your dysphoria feels suffocating:

if you're still alright with being touched, Ringo smothers you in one of his famous bear hugs and tells you that everything is okay and you're no less valid for feeling this way about your body

he brings your favorite snack/treat into your room for you to eat and enjoy

he'll sit on the bed and engage in honest conversation with you if you feel like venting; if not he brings you all of the pillows, blankets, and/or stuffed animals in the house- as well as any clothes you'd like to change into

he showers you with gender-affirming nicknames and compliments: "my handsome man," "my prince/king," "heartthrob," "hunk," "stud"... some of them silly, but all of them sincere

Ringo is sure to remind you that no matter what your body looks like or how you're feeling about it in this moment (and no matter what bigoted asswipes may say to either of you), you are just as valid and masculine as any other man:

"Because that's what you are, my love- a man!" ♡

72 notes · View notes

fairyoftbz · 3 years

Text

Étoilé | m. kevin

🏵 pairing: bf!Kevin x fem!reader 🏵 genre: fluff, suggestive 🏵 word count: 2.5k 🏵 tw: suggestive themes, a very badly written make-out session in the water 🏵 synopsis: you thought that you’d celebrate your relationship anniversary like every other couple, but Kevin had another plan in mind. 🏵 requested: yes! thank u!! 🏵 a/n: i apologise if it’s cringe or in a rush, i’m still not used to writing this type of thing! i hope it’s any good...

╰☆☆☆☆╮

Today was a special day for you and Kevin. Celebrating your third year together, happiness hadn't left you since you met this young, talented man. You were over the moon (no pun intended) when you first started dating this little ray of sunshine, and you don’t know where you would be or what you would do if he had never appeared in your life. He brought so much positivity in your life that you could only thank him for making you a better person and the happiest girl on earth.

And today was the day to celebrate those beautiful years of common life. Kevin and you had made sure that you were clear of any type of schedule or appointments to make the most of this beautiful day. In addition to that, the weather seemed to be on your side considering the temperature skyrocketing as the hours passed, not a single cloud on the horizon ready to come and ruin your day, none of that. It looked like even the stars were ready to celebrate your anniversary by offering you the warmth necessary.

You had talked about your plans a few days prior, and you were the one to come up with a beautiful idea. Why not going back to the places that were essential throughout your three years of common life?

Kevin instantly agreed with the idea, suggesting places that brought back beautiful memories. You managed to narrow down the places you wanted to visit again to three.

The first place was the coffee shop where you worked as a student with his sister, the one who made this relationship possible by introducing you to him one night during an aperitif at the shop. You remembered how attractive you found him, being a spluttering mess the entire night spent getting to know each other better.

The next spot was the abandoned field a few streets away from your apartment building. As for your second date, he had prepared a picnic and you spent the entire day there, flirting like two teenagers. You played around and joked for a while, Kevin suddenly asking you to kiss him. Wanting to play around and tease him, you only kissed his cheek and scurried away, leaving an offended Kevin behind. After running out of breath while trying to flee from your date chasing you, you fell back on the picnic tablecloth and timidly pecked his lips before pulling away, your boyfriend becoming flustered by your actions, a bit disappointed that it didn’t last any longer.

And the third place was at the beach, where you spent the entire day together, enjoying the ocean and the sun as much as you could. Kevin, being the hopeless romantic that he is, asked you to be his girlfriend as the sun was setting, making the scene unforgettable. You still remembered it, even three years later, gladly telling the story to anyone with a huge smile on your face.

You were so sure to have become the protagonist of a fiction that you had to pinch yourself after he had asked you out, just to make sure that you weren’t hallucinating.

And today, you felt all giddy to back to the same place you went to for your second date. just like the first time, he prepared a nice picnic and messaged you to meet him up at the same spot as a few years prior.

Kevin looked handsome when you arrived, and you were excited to spend the day together. Everything surrounding you was gorgeous, you took a lot of pictures from the scenery and your boyfriend, having fun and flirting like the first time until the sun decided to leave. However, instead of acting cute, Kevin was more teasing, sometimes borderline explicit, just to see the bashful look on your face.

“Stooop, not this loud,” you playfully nudged him in the ribs and he cockily raised his eyebrow, breaking into a laugh.

He swiftly tackled you to the ground and hovered above you, nearing his face to yours while whispering sweet nothings into your ears. You grabbed his face and gently grabbed it away from you to press your lips against his, slowly making out with him.

“So I am not allowed to whisper things to you, but you can kiss me like that?” he said while pulling away, making you giggle as you looked to the side. “You know that there are families around, with children, trying to have a good time together. So try to keep your needs to the bedroom, baby,” he teased, and you rolled your eyes with a huff, knowing that he felt the same as you did.

His teasing grin confirmed what you thought, the light in his eyes changing into something quite different, hotter, needier. With only one look, you understood the other and immediately packed everything, putting away things in a rush, Kevin on your heels as you dashed to the car park of the supermarket nearby. When you were in the car, giggling like a schoolgirl as the exhilaration rushed through your veins, your boyfriend’s hand resting on your thigh as it innocently trailed higher the closer you got from your apartment, breath itching in your throat each time he teased you even more.

Yet, as you were about to take the small street to reach your building, Kevin decided differently by driving right past it, speeding away after taking a sudden turn. Your eyes watched the street sign and you smiled as he started following a route to a well-known spot: the beach.

In the thrill of getting out of the car, you took the untidily folded tablecloth and bolted to the beach, laying it on the sand before happily sitting down between Kevin’s legs. His arms immediately surrounded your waist and his mouth trailed open-mouthed kisses on the skin of your neck, making you shudder at the sensation. Kevin smirked as you were easily affected by his touch, laid hold of your waist to press you further against him.

You smiled and gave a half-suppressed laugh as you pressed your cheek on his shoulder, getting lost in the sensation as you struggled to suppress the moans that were already threatening to spill at the abandoned field. Your boyfriend stopped for a while and you sighed in relief, feeling your heartbeat slowly calming down as he stopped his ardent attack on your neck.

“I have an idea,” Kevin declared, now huskily whispering in your ear. “Yeah?” you replied as his hand gently caressed your thighs up and down. “Do you follow me?” you slightly frowned at his words, turning your body around as you watched him get up. He took off his baseball cap and dropped it on the tablecloth, grabbing the back of his V-neck sweater and took it off before unbuttoning the first few buttons of his shirt.

“You wanna go in the water?” You stated, observed getting into work, earning a smirk from the man standing in front of you. “Isn’t it a good idea?” Smirking, he threw his shirt at you while biting his lower lip, rolling your eyes at his comment. “The last in the water will do the dishes until September!” he yelled as he was about to take off his jeans, only to watch you spring on your feet and removed your dress, getting ahead of him as you wore fewer items of clothing than him.

He froze for a quick second as he saw the sheer, sexy white lingerie you hid under the fabric of your dress, his distracted eyes allowing you to take the lead and run towards the ocean at full speed. The water was cold but the burning sensation travelling your body didn’t prevent you from entering the ocean. It managed to cool you down instantly as you got water to your stomach, gazing at a defeated Kevin that arrived a few seconds after you.

“That is so unfair,” he said while entering the water, dragging you by the waist in deeper water as you laughed.

With your hands resting on his shoulders, he glanced at you with a smirk tugging on his lips, wrapping your legs around his waist. Hair framed your face in the most gorgeous way, Kevin observing you with admiring eyes, a gentle smile appearing on his face.

“You are gorgeous Y/N. You never told me you were wearing this set though,” he mumbled, without being affected by the small waves, looking at you with a sudden sparkle of lust illuminating his eyes. “Oh. My mistake. I should have undressed in front of everyone at the field to show you,” you murmured with a mocking smile, only to have Kevin roughly grabbing the back of your head to pull you against his mouth, messily kissing your lips as he hungrily held you tight against him.

The hotness of your bodies grinning against the other was almost enough to warm up the entire ocean, his touches lingered in your mind as his hands travelled lower to grab your ass. You hated to admit it, but Kevin only needed to kiss you with all his might to make you melt in a small puddle of love. It was delicious, you couldn’t even deny it, his hands kneading the flesh of your butt cheeks always achieved to make you feel some type of way. Just feeling him against you felt like heaven, pressed chests heaving together as you were about to lose yourself to him.

“Don’t play with me, baby,” he mumbled against your lips before kissing you again with more eagerness this time. You grabbed the shorter hair at the back of his head and tugged on it, Kevin emitting a groan against your lips.

Pulling away, he slowly yet roughly grabbed your lower lip between his teeth, tugging and playing with it as his hands were busy playing with the wet lace underwater, pursing your lips to stifle a whimper.

Lust and arousal filled your eyes as you stared at Kevin, barely keeping them open at the intensity of the emotions you were feeling. He let go of a hand on your ass to come and gently cup your throat, tongue slowly entering your mouth and easily dominating yours as you felt a rush of heat bolting south, a small moan escaping your mouth.

“I’ll never get over how easily you get turned on with just with my hand around your throat,” he chuckled, and you groaned, slightly annoyed at how cocky he sounded.

Kevin acted all smug and playful, but you also knew he was slowly losing his mind at how much he loved and cared for you. The only thing that he wanted to do right now was showing you all the love he had for you, but he also knew that words and actions weren’t going to be enough to even reach how much he loved you.

You wanted to talk back, but he was quick to silence you by trailing his hand to your cheek to cradle it while his mouth went the opposite direction, leaving prominent hickeys on the smaller ones that he gave you on the beach and at the field. Your eyes rolled at the back of your head and your stomach did somersaults at the overwhelming sensation.

“I think that’s enough foreplay. Don’t you think?” you said, and his mouth stretched into a smirk, dying the following second as he kept on taking the right path to send you to cloud nine. “Someone’s quite eager tonight, hm? Let me take care of you, love,” he whispered and disappeared in between your breasts.

[...]

Chests rising and falling against the other, Kevin gave you a quick kiss on the lips and another one on your jaw before walking closer to the shore hand in hand, feeling the exhaustion washing over you. With an arm crossing over your breasts just in case, you picked up the discarded bra on the sand that your boyfriend threw a few moments prior, holding it away from you as it was wet and sandy.

You both quickly paced to your tablecloth, drying yourselves as best as you could as you got dressed again, relieved when you noticed that no one had stolen anything during your little lovemaking session. The adrenaline rushed through your veins as you pulled your dress over your body again, shivering as you felt the lace wet some parts of your dress. Quickly discarding the panties off your legs for some comfort, you glanced at your boyfriend who was rebuttoning his shirt as if nothing happened.

“Naughty girl,” he smirked as he detailed your actions, handing you his V-neck sweater. “I’m not that cold,” you stated but took it anyway, Kevin breaking in a fit of laughter. “Your nipples say otherwise, darling, or it's the thrill of getting freaky in the ocean maybe?” your eyes widened at his boldness, a shocked, playful look painting your face before putting his sweater on. “You perv,” you giggled, and he shook his head, grabbing the panties you were holding and tucked them in his jeans back pocket.

Turning back to the ocean, you looked at the dark blue water, the starry sky and the moon illuminating the small waves and the foam crashing on the sand before vanishing back in the salty water. You sighed and softly smiled, two arms wrapping around your shoulders in a much gentler way than a few moments prior.

“What are you thinking about, Y/N?” Kevin whispered in your ear and you lifted a hand to rest it on one of his forearms, enjoying your boyfriend’s hold and warmth surrounding you. The teasing atmosphere had disappeared, getting replaced by something deeper, softer. “Look at the sky, it looks gorgeous,” you whispered as if speaking louder would break the moment. Kevin kissed your cheek, lips lingering on your skin and you smiled, gently turning your head to peck his lips. Everything was slower, gentler, and softer as if your actions in the water were just a great memory. “It is indeed gorgeous, there’s nothing compared to you admiring it,” he whispered, and you smiled, a delicate warmth engulfing your heart in a hug at his cheesy words.

Boy, this man was a flirt, but you adored it. It made you feel like you were still in the chasing part without the doubt of not being this type, and you could stay in this state forever.

“I love you,” you whispered, and Kevin placed himself in front of you, lifting your head with his finger under your chin, admiring your face as pure love adorned his pupils. “I love you too Y/N, to the moon and back. I love you even more than all the stars in the sky tonight. Happy anniversary, love,” he whispered before taking your hand, lifting it to his lips to press a gentle kiss on top.

You shivered at the contact and Kevin drew you closer to him, lips connecting with your forehead before you started to walk back to his car.

He was the best thing that had ever happened to you.

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bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher · 4 years

Text

under pressure

(hey guys, welcome to another installment of the swashbuckler au. Geralt’s gonna get very very Protective in this 'chapter'.

warnings for this chapter include: a very brief mention of blood, being threatened with a knife, and mild peril)

Why? Jaskier wondered. His back was pressed tightly against the rough brick of an unfamiliar alley wall and the man who had demanded his nonexistent coin-purse was pressing the tip of a very sharp dagger just below his navel. Why am I always the one getting into these kinds of situations?

“I told you, good sir, that I have no money on my person.”

“Everyone around here keeps gold ‘im. What kind of idiot goes around a port town full of pirates without some kind of insurance against coming to harm?”

“Are you saying that because I have no money you are going to do me harm?”

“Somethin’ like that,” the man leered. The dagger pushed in again and Jaskier knew that it had ripped through the fabric of his shirt when the tip suddenly bumped against the skin of his stomach. “Since you don’t have any money you’ll just have to come back and explain this misunderstanding to my captain yourself.”

“Excuse m-��

The man yanked Geralt’s lucky red bandanna down and tugged it backwards, sliding it between his teeth and effectively gagging the ex-nobleman. He spun Jaskier around and shoved his chest up tightly to the brick. The brigand roughly yanked his hands behind his back and tied them with a length of rope that appeared from seemingly nowhere. The newly minted pirate struggled violently, kicking out his legs and wiggling his torso in an effort to dislodge or disrupt his attacker. Maybe his struggling would get someone’s attention (although it was highly unlikely in a town such as this). Unfortunately the mugger was practiced and nothing Jaskier tried seemed to bother or slow him down at all.

Starkey and Lambert were only a few feet away! He could hear the rise and fall of their voices as they bartered for supplies with the hardtack merchant around the corner. The anxious brunette whined, trying to make the sound high enough to reach his friends and crewmates. If only he could get the kerchief out of his mouth for a split second, then he could whistle or shout…

He felt the surface of the wall scratching his skin through the hole in his shirt and he frowned. That would leave an unpleasant mark for the next few days and make wearing his sword-belt an absolute nightmare. If he was still part of the Kaer Morhen’s crew by nightfall, that was. If this man didn’t succeed in his current mission of pressing Jaskier into service aboard some other pirate vessel. Jaskier’s blue eyes widened even further as a real sense of panic set in. They might not be able to find me in time. We might head out to sea before Geralt even knows I’m missing if they don’t turn around and noti-

“Hey, where’s Jaskier?” he heard Starkey ask. Oh, thank gods.

“Shit.”

“We’d better find him quickly because I can see Geralt from here,” Starkey added. “I don’t want to be the one to tell him that we lost his precious little siren while we were busy bickering with a shopkeeper.”

“Fucking hells,” Lambert groaned. C’mon, Jaskier pleaded silently. Just around the corner, lads. Please, Starkey. You guys know I’m too annoying to stay quiet for this long.

The man with the dagger had already started yanking him backwards down the alley towards a questionable-looking wagon. Jaskier’s attacker kept one hand fisted into the back of the kerchief and used it to maneuver his head around, much like one would control the reins of a horse. The ex-noble made a loud, wordless noise from behind the cloth. Muffled as he was, he was praying that any one of his crewmates heard it and felt the need to investigate.

Another stranger in dark clothing appeared around the corner and helped the first man lift Jaskier onto the back of the wagon. The newcomer reached for Jaskier’s wildly flailing legs and pulled them together. He tied the brunette’s ankles with another piece of strong hemp rope and tested the knots with his fingers for any slack or give. There was none. The young man screamed and grunted, trying with every ounce of strength he possessed to free himself from their twin grips. It was a fruitless endeavor; they were strong and clearly practiced in the art of stealing other people’s crewmembers.

“Jaskier! Oh, fuck! Hey you there, let go of him!” Lambert was running down the alley towards them, hand on the hilt of his cutlass. The man keeping the gag cinched tight pulled his dagger out again, holding it up against the column of Jaskier’s throat. The second kidnapper released Jaskier’s tied ankles and made his way towards the front of the wagon. Lambert slid to a stop, eyes narrowed threateningly. “Captain! Starkey! I found ‘im. He’s in danger!”

Had Jaskier not been scared witless by the threat of having his life ended rather abruptly via blood-loss, he probably would have smirked. These men, regardless of who their scurvy-ridden captain was, were about to get their asses handed to them by one of the most wanted pirates to ever sail the seven seas. Certainly one of the most renowned and fearsome.

The blade of the knife pressed even more tightly against the skin of his Adam's apple and Jaskier flinched. Maybe, if I even live long enough to see Geralt kick their asses. At least my death will be avenged quickly, otherwise.

As if summoned by his lover’s thoughts the handsome, white-haired Captain appeared at the opposite end of the alley. Jaskier thought he might cry from the mere sight of him. He definitely wanted to let out a relieved sob when Geralt growled out, “It’ll go easier for both of you if you just put the dagger down and release the boy now.”

The ex-noble felt his captor’s muscles twitching nervously as he released a humorless chuckle. Don’t slip up now, Jaskier prayed. Not while you’ve got a knife against my neck.

“Why should we do that?” his captor questioned. The man tugged at the already taut bandanna and Jaskier whined in pain when the damp material bit into the skin of his cheeks. The fury written across Geralt’s features was absolutely terrifying; he looked like an avenging angel, his strong stature defined by the light of the square behind him and his silvery hair wild around his face.

Jaskier didn’t want to die, not in the slightest, but this wouldn’t be the worst last sight to see, all things considered. The man tugged the material again and Jaskier’s eyes widened when his neck scraped against the edge of the dagger’s sharp blade. “He’d fetch a fair price from our captain. He’d probably fetch a very hefty bit of gold if we took him down the coast a-ways, actually. Your threats aren’t going to lose me a nice bag of coin.”

Geralt took one slow, measured step forward and drew his cutlass with an effortless extension of his arm. “I’ll give you one last chance to let him go peacefully before I start slitting throats,” he snarled. The scowl on his face would make any ordinary person soil their knickers on sight, but the man holding Jaskier had probably seen something like this before. He was experienced. He teasingly nicked the young man’s tanned skin with the dagger and Jaskier hissed. The sound had Geralt’s eyes going wide with rage. His nostrils flared and his hand twitched. The kidnapper smirked confidently as a thin line of blood beaded on the brunette's skin, “Oops.”

There was a blur of movement from Geralt’s end of the alley, a whooshing sound, and then a wet thud. The man keeping Jaskier captive fell back, dropping his dagger to the ground below as he did. Jaskier wriggled forward in an attempt to reach Geralt and ended up toppling heavily off the back of the wagon and onto the cobblestone street. Lambert dashed to his side and pulled the kerchief out from between his teeth. The younger man was panting, blue eyes wild and confused. “Did Geralt just hit that guy with a knife!?”

“Yeah.”

The ex-noble gave a short, hysterical laugh. His eyes took on a glazed, unfocused quality and Lambert looked to Geralt for help. “Neat,” he muttered.

Jaskier wasn’t sure if it was the shock of having his life legitimately threatened, the smell of his own blood invading his nose, or the impact from hitting the stone walkway, but just as Geralt knelt down at his side, he passed out.

----------

When his eyelids finally fluttered open again, Jaskier had to squint. The late-afternoon sun slanted in through the porthole of Geralt’s cabin, surrounding the grim-faced Captain with a halo of golden light. “My hero,” Jaskier sighed. He was a lucky man to have a lover so attentive, protective, and also incredibly sexy.

“Jaskier!” the pirate pulled him into a sitting position and wrapped him in a hug, crushing the slightly smaller man against his broad chest. “I was so worried that he’d gotten your vein or hurt you some other way that we couldn’t see. Are you alright, little nymph?”

“I’m alright,” he blushed. Geralt’s nose was buried stubbornly in his hair, breathing in repeatedly as if he’d been afraid he’d never see Jaskier awake again. “Really, darling, I’m just a little shaken. That’s all. I thought we were running errands today. I wasn’t expecting to be taken captive and threatened with a life of piracy.”

“You’re - Jask, you’re living a life of piracy.”

“It was a joke,” the ex-noble teased. Geralt relaxed his grip slightly and leaned back. His amber eyes searched Jaskier’s blue ones for any sign of dishonesty or hidden pain and found none. His siren was telling the truth. The Captain took a seat on the edge of his small bed and dragged his lover onto his lap. Jaskier noticed with a sly smile that he was draped in one of the White Wolf’s overly-large burgundy shirts. One he didn’t wear very often but that Jaskier found him endlessly attractive in nonetheless. “Geralt, did you change my shirt for me?”

“Your other one was ripped. It had blood on it. We also had to bandage your wounds.”

“Oh. Thank you for letting me borrow it,” Jaskier flapped his arms a little, letting the sleeves roll down over his hands. “I love roomy shirts to sleep in.”

“You can just ask to borrow them,” the Captain relented. “You don’t always need a scheme to get what you want, little nymph.”

“Hmm,” Jaskier sighed, cuddling close again. “I absolutely did not think up the idea of coming to bodily harm in order to borrow your shirts, as likely as that sounds. Thank you for rescuing me, Geralt.”

“I am not an easy man to scare,” the pirate intoned seriously. His grip on Jaskier tightened and his voice grew scratchy with emotion as he continued. “But seeing you like that today had me more frightened than I’ve ever been before in my life. I’ve faced down bigger ships with better guns and more men than mine. I was briefly incarcerated by the mayor of Novigrad and sentenced to hang. I’ve seen my fair share of scary things, my sweet siren, but I would never be able to live with myself if you came to harm. That’s the most terrifying thought of all.”

“Geralt,” the young man gasped. He wrapped his arms around his Captain’s shoulders and moved to straddle the larger man’s wide lap. He pressed a brief but bracing kiss to the White Wolf’s saltwater-chapped lips. “The thought of never seeing you again is the worst thought in the world. Let us never be parted.”

“Hmm.” Geralt’s left hand moved to grip Jaskier’s corresponding hip while his right arm went around the back of his nymph’s slender shoulders. He gently pulled their chests together and nibbled his way up the uninjured side of his little nymph’s neck, reveling in every soft, yielding noise the brunette made. He pressed a rough, wet kiss to the soft skin behind Jaskier’s ear and growled possessively, “Never.”

(of course 1/2 of all my swashbuckling au credit goes to @limrx)

476 notes · View notes

shelby-love · 4 years

Text

ADAM RUZEK

Dream Partner

Requested: yes

Prompts: none

Warning(s): none

Author’s note: I freaking love Adam. P.S. this was not proofread or edited!

Note: One Chicago requests are CLOSED!

∼

"What do you think detective?"

You pursed your lips and watched as two members of the academy rolled over the floor in a heap to get the guns out of each other’s hold.

"Tell me," You started uneasily. "Who was supposed to take the gun again?"

"Um," The man scratched the back of his head uneasily. "That would be Adam Ruzek."

"The one on the top?" You asked, just to be sure.

"Well, um… Yeah. That's him detective."

Sighing, you knew there was no time to waste. "We'll take him."

The officer's mouth dropped to the floor.

Out of all the members of the academy.

You chose him.

Adam Ruzek.

"Are you sure detective?" The officer asked when he saw the way Ruzek's eyes swept you over, drinking you in... Probably even undressing you.

You locked eyes with the young man but spoke to the higher authority, "Don't worry officer. I'll glue him to my right hip if I have to."

***

"Look Jin we don't have all day," You said, placing both palms on the counter in an urgent matter, "Just give him something from the top shelf."

Adam held a piece of tech Jin graciously delivered to him in a ginger hold, not quite knowing what to do with it. You considered it to be a piece of garbage so now, you were negotiating with him.

You wouldn't usually do that, even the glare Jin gave you said so.

Shaking his head, Jin went back to retrieve a new piece of tech.

"So –" Adam started, waving the tech piece in the air.

You slapped it out of his hold.

"Feisty."

You snorted, "Anything for you big guy."

He chuckled at the nickname. "I like you Y/N."

You narrowed your eyes at him. "Can't you seriously keep it in your pants?"

Adam laughed in a matter you thought to be attractive.

"Here," Jin's voice brought you back to reality. He handed your new partner a slightly better piece of technology. "But I want it back."

You rolled your eyes, "C'mon Ruzek. Let's go."

The taller man shrugged, still captivated by the toy he was given. Adam turned around casually whilst you gave Jin your best death glare.

"Whipped." He mouthed, pointing between you two aggressively.

***

"So, we're just going to sit here all day?"

"Well it is our job," You mumbled, staring out of the car with your binoculars. A pair of chips and several other types of junk food was sprawled all over the car, and you kept munching on with ease.

"Well it's not very productive." He noted, snatching both the binoculars and the French frie from you. You pouted in return but put on your poker face immediately after.

Adam noticed, but he didn't say anything, only stared out of the binoculars, munching on the stolen frie.

"Not productive? Huh," You sighed, not quite believing your ears. Clapping your hands together in your lap, you straightened your posture and prepared yourself to speak. "We're essential. The most important part of the whole team."

You could see his eyebrows raise, even though they were hidden away. "Oh, really? You and me?"

You blushed ever so slightly.

"Yes. You and me," You agreed. "It may not look that way right now, but –"

"Hold on," He interrupted you suddenly. "I think I see something."

He was looking out of the window on the left side of the car; his side.

You scrunched your eyebrows and snatched the binoculars swiftly. "Hey! I was looking through them."

"Shut up," You mumbled, brushing him off while trying to get a grip, so you could see what he saw through his window.

It didn't work, and so you hunched over the seat in a mad heap for clearer vision.

"Ow!"

You didn't quite understand what had happened until you felt his hands grasp your elbow. "You elbowed me in the junk."

Heat rose to your cheeks almost instantly. This had never quite happened before.

Especially not with a man as handsome as Adam.

"I…well," You had attempted to start your train of apology with flustered cheeks when a dark clothed figure passed right by your eyes in a blur. "We need to move. Now!"

Adam listened to you, even though he didn't want to at that moment. His wish to see you flustered and cornered was close in his mind, becoming a what one would call a priority.

But even he wasn't as tool as people thought.

You might have been younger than him year wise, but you were a senior in this line of work.

Your word goes.

He dashed out of the black car right after you.

"This is detective Y/LN," You yelled into the radio, holding your pistol firmly toward the ground with the other hand. "We're chasing a suspect on foot, going north in 8th Street!"

You peeped over your shoulder, hoping to see Adam behind you. He was there, although not as close as you had hoped he would be.

You did nail him in the crotch after all. The consequences of that were obvious.

He was going to have a harder time keeping up.

***

"You son of a bi-" You spit out blood on the ground.

The man before you was tricky, he led you through numerous small streets in hopes of losing your newest partner. It turned out to be his lucky day, as Adam was left in the dust after just 6 turns and 4 fence jumping.

Nevertheless, you were fighting off this man alone, one way or another.

When he struck, you ducked. You threw punches of your own, getting more blows than he did.

The suspect pulled back his fist and swung it at you. You were quick on your feet, which resulted in you evading the otherwise hard blow to your jaw.

His footing was off, you noted.

It was a matter of seconds before he would tire himself out and swing in a way that would have him hurling to the ground by pure physics.

You could help get him to the ground faster, and so you raised your leg and struck him to the abdomen. The man hurled to his knees, and you took that chance to strike his chin with your own knee and finish him off.

Bones broke under the impact; you could feel it.

You sighed tiredly, swiping the sleeve of your shirt under your busted lip. "Holy sh-"

Your finger rose into the air before Adam could even finish. "Not a word. I don't want to hear a word from you."

You turned your head to the suspect, looking down on his hunched form. "Do you need me to tell you your rights?"

He couldn't even nod, so you just grabbed him, hands behind his back and hurled him up. "Good. I'm not in the mood either."

You continued to mumble about how you had to do everything by yourself and how you were going to teach your new partner a lesson as you pulled the staggering man out of someone's backyard.

"Thank God no one was home," Adam tried to joke, jogging to catch up with you.

You glared at him behind your shoulder, making him and his body go haywire.

He found you incredibly sexy at that moment. The annoyance you felt toward him would vanish as soon as it was you two in the car again. He just knew it.

Adam wasn't giving up. Not now.

Not ever.

Especially not when his partner was sent down from heaven.

"Ah man. She's perfect."

Tags (general): @fofisstilinski @short-potato @miranda0102 @httphiddlestan @caromichaela @xx-missunicorn-xx @jemmakates @theravenclawmarauder @httphiddlestan @tclaerh @chefdoeuvre ; (One Chicago): @lorenakaspersen ; (Chicago P.D.): @scarletsoldierrr

MASTERLIST

#adam ruzek #Adam ruzek imagine #adam ruzek fanfiction #adam ruzek x reader #adam ruzek x you #adam ruzek one shot #adam ruzek fanfic #Chicago PD #chicago pd fanfiction #chicago pd imagine #chicago pd x reader

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prettylilhalforc · 3 years

Note

For your post about asks!

How about Loki and Tyche TP-ing Thor's house? :) For shits and giggles.

@yespolkadotkitty dearest, thank you for such a brilliant ask!

This was an absolute joy to write, once I started, I found it near impossible to stop!!!

Have tweaked the scenario ever so slightly to fit with in Pre Thor cannon.

I do hope you like it lovely!!!!!!!

Fortune Favours the Bold

Warnings: Fluffy mischievous goodness with a dash of pining. F!OC (though am totally down to make a Hermes/Loki fic because you KNOW those two would be trouble with a captial T). Allusion to sexy times.

Rating: M at best, please no under 18s.

Summary: Two gods of mirth and mischief meet once again during diplomatic talks. No one is safe. Chaos ensues.

Tension in the air was positively electric. The glorious feast hall brimming with dignitaries and diplomats alike. Raucous laughter drowns out the jaunt of lyres and lutes. Ambrosia flows like water. Satyrs and Valkyries entwine in celebration, sailing across the marble floor.

A commemoration of months of negotiations culminating to a head.

Finally.

The Olympian delegation had sent their finest emissaries to engage in age-old diplomatic negotiations.

Wise Athena, clever Hermes, and blessed Tyche.

Counsel between the two empires had dragged on for what felt like aeons. The solidification of military alliances had given way tedious litigation. Delving into infuriatingly pithy details of trade agreements and petty squabbles. Either party proved to be as formidable within counsel chambers as they were in the heat of battle.

Steadfast, stubborn, and cunning. No stone left unturned. No treaty left untouched.

Honestly, it was a sheer miracle that either of them managed to contain themselves as long as they had.

Fortune and Mischief.

Antics almost as legendary as the diplomatic talks themselves.

For the past several hundred years the duo had become notorious for their pranks. Each year outdoing the last. Not a single soul, Asgardian nor Olympian, was safe from their machinations.

Across the banquet hall, two pairs of eyes meet. One emerald, one amber; both brimming with diabolical glee. The raven-haired god offers a silent toast to his compatriot. The feminine figure shoots him a roguish smirk before mirroring the gesture. In almost perfect synchronicity, both drink deep from their cups.

Save for the watchful gaze of Freyja, none would be wiser to the fact that neither party were actually present at the feast.

It was time for the real festivities to begin.

----------------------------------------------------------------

A slow, soft clap echoes across the dimly lit corridor. Flames of nearby torches casting a deceptively long shadow of the smaller, robed figure.

Pulling down the hood of her woven cloak, Tyche winks, “Bravo, you scamp. Never thought I’d see the day that the great Orator himself would be caught tongue tied. ”

Emerging from the shadows, the Trickster god gives a flourishing bow, wry smirk writ on his face. “One would be remiss to pass such an opportunity to point out such a glaring oversight in litigation to the God of all Merchants.

Rising gracefully, Loki flicks his raven locks from his face, full of mirth. "Merely doing my duty to ensure the prosperity of either kingdom. As any good consul would.”

Pure laughter bubbles forth from her lips as she leans against the cool marble, “Indeed, rightfully so, Prince of Asgard! Remind me never to cross you on the battlefield. If your blade is as sharp as your tongue, I would surely meet my end. Now, philon, how long would you wager before brother dearest finds himself neck deep in nymph?”

Ebony eyebrow cocked, Loki folds his arms over his leather bound chest. “What fiendish scheme has the vixen of Olympus concocted this time?”

A faint flash of gold illuminates the darkness; a large, sealed amphora appears seemingly from thin air in her delicate hands. Tyche’s warm eyes light up with delight as she leans toward the Asgardian, gently tapping the prince’s nose.

“If you’re keen to find out, we best make haste.”

Turning on her heel, she dashes forth through the corridors laughing with childish glee. The lavender linen of the chiton billowing behind her. Loki gives chase, winding the well-worn paths from their youth.

Breathless the pair find themselves in front of large oaken doors of Thor’s chambers.

Glancing about fervidly, Tyche man’s watch, clutching the earthen vase to her chest with one hand whilst cloaking the duo with the other. Loki’s nimble fingers lace his verdant Seidr through the enchanted lock. Thor had grown wise to his brother’s mischief and sought additional measures from to secure his chambers since the last delegation.

Though, this had proven to be naught but a challenge. An opportunity to hone his skills.

Footsteps resound through the stone hall. The pair share a look of pure terror, eyes widening as the steps approach. Neither deigned to breathe, hearts thundering in their chests. Each second stretching for an eternity.

“Hurry! Before they round the corner!” Tyche hisses.

Sweat beading at his brow, Loki manages to secure the last tumble with a desperate flick. Not a moment later, those same nimble hands grip her frame, all but flinging the small goddess into his brother’s quarters.

Upon regaining her composure, Tyche twirls around in girlish excitement, laughing wildly before falling into the luxurious bed. Her companion chuckles deep within his chest, shaking his head at her antics.

A tiny voice emerging from the depths of his psyche, noting that it was a sight one could become very accustomed to.

Snapping the God of Mischief from his musing, Tyche exclaims, “A gift from sweet Athena herself!”

She holds the amphora aloft like a prized laurel in both hands. Bolting upright, Tyche hefts the earthen vessel towards him with an impish grin.

Catching it with feline grace, lithe fingers pry open the ruddy wax seal revealing length after length of translucent strands of near viscous spider’s silk.

Loki’s vibrant greeneyes widen in disbelief as he steps nearer to the bed, handsome mouth opening and closing several times, “How did she let- Why- Is that what I think it is?! ”.

“Arachne’s thread? Indeed, it is, my Prince.” Tyche states, before spitting out, “After the audacity of that blond oaf to insult our honour after yesterday’s proceedings, my dear cousin was easily persuaded to turn a blind eye.”

Lok’s handsome face splits in to sheer, unadulterated joy. Rubbing his hands together he exclaims, “Never have I been more eager to see my brother eat his words. To work, shall we?”

A broad, pale hand extends forth towards the Goddess of Fortune. With it, an offer to dance.

And what a beautifully chaotic dance it is. The pair dip and weave from post to pillar, as the near invisible strands are strewn across the crimson expanse of the room. Flashes of green and golden light bounce off the gleaming marble, followed by peels of laughter.

Norns how he had missed this.

Soon the chambers transformed into a hidden web, ready to ensnare Thor and his amorous companion.

And not a moment too soon.

A voice resounds beyond the door, booming like thunder followed by saccharine giggles.

In a flurry, Tyche grabs the Trickster god by his leathers, dashing through the heavy velvet curtain onto the nearby balcony.

Another deep chuckle threatens to rumble forth from Loki’s chest, cut short by the gentle press of a warm to his lips. Tyche cocks her head, motioning for her counterpart to listen, worrying her bottom lip.

Loki’s gaze drifts to the plump lip caught between her teeth. How had he not noticed the plushness of her sweet mouth before now?

The resounding slam of the heavy chamber doors hurls him back to the present.

Within the chamber, giggles give way to soft gasps and groans.

The chill night air suddenly a welcome relief as the amorous activity causes a flush to rise the column of his neck. In it hangs something foreign yet all too familiar. Neither mischief maker dares to make eye contact, shifting awkwardly as the amorous sounds grow in volume.

Thankfully a shrill shriek cuts through tension, followed shortly a resounding bellow,

“LOKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! TYCHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

Two pairs of eye meet, one emerald, one amber. Both brimming with diabolical glee. In almost perfect synchronicity, the pair cackling wildly as they descend to the gardens below.

#ask requests #thank you for the inspiration!#yespolkadotkitty #goblin tries her hand at letters #loki x F!OC #pre thor #a pair of scamps #Loki #God of Mischief #please don't hate me

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magicalmarauder · 5 years

Text

Yours

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Language, slight suggestive themes

Word Count: 3.2k +

Summary: Usually your boyfriend struggles with insecurity and believing why you would choose to stay with him; however, after a talking to from you in which you explain exactly how special and loved he is, he transforms into your sexy super soldier to ward off potential suitors and claim you for his own.

After checking your makeup one last time, you placed the tiny mirror you had been using back into your clutch as the elevator dinged, signaling your arrival onto the top floor of the Avengers tower for the latest soiree that Tony Stark had arranged. Taking a deep breath, you steeled yourself for the next few hours of tedious conversations and lingering stares from random individuals who respected your work as an Avenger enough to come and support the team, but who were still too terrified to actually approach you and strike up a conversation.

It was one of the two main reactions you would usually garner at these types of events: reserved and fearful attention from afar or overly confident assholes who would approach you with the express goal of hooking up with an Avenger to then go brag to their friends about. Either way, these events and the people you had to endure were exhausting. Considering a majority of your time was spent in life or death situations, on your time off, you would really rather just curl up in bed with your beloved boyfriend, laughing at the latest ridiculous reality show and soaking in the sweetness of such peaceful and rare moments.

Speaking of said boyfriend, you craned your head around the crowded rooftop, searching out the super soldier. Your eyes wandered first to the lone corners, suspecting him to be hiding himself away as far from people as possible. If there was anyone who hated these events more than yourself, it was definitely Bucky Barnes. Although the public had come around to the Winter Soldier and his involvement with the Avengers, there was still a certain level of fear and caution that was exercised by most who came in contact with him.

“He’s hanging around the bar with Steve and Sam,” you heard a sudden voice murmur from behind you.

Turning, your eyes focused on none other than the Black Widow herself, dressed to perfection in a stunning blood red dress and sipping on a glass of champagne.

“Thanks, Tasha,” you grinned, receiving a nod in acknowledgement, before she sashayed over to where a larger crowd had congregated together, looking like a shark about to sink its teeth into its prey. Out of all the team, Natasha was probably the one who enjoyed these parties the most, reveling in every opportunity to terrorize the male population and the seedy individuals who often frequented these events.

Shaking your head with a fond smile on your face, you turned in the direction of the bar, preparing to join your boyfriend with the hopes of easing each other’s suffering until you could finally call it a night.

As you drew closer, you finally noticed the gorgeous form of your boyfriend, dressed up in a sexy navy-blue suit paired with a white dress shirt with the top buttons undone, revealing a portion of his toned chest.

Licking your lips, you sidled up next to him, placing a hand on his bicep and placing a sweet peck to his cheek. “Hi there, handsome,” you murmured sweetly before pulling away to gaze up at him.

A beautiful smile lit up his face as he beheld you, an expression that only seemed to arise when you were near. Allowing his eyes to wander up and down your form, he let out a low, slow whistle. “You look incredible, doll,” he complimented, a light blush dusting his cheeks as he remembered that you were his girl and that you were here with him and that more importantly, you would be going home with him at the end of the night. “Most beautiful girl in attendance.”

“Oh, stop,” you chuckled, swatting at his chest playfully and rolling your eyes at the adorable man who never failed to make you swoon. For a man who had undergone intense mind-control for the better part of a century and claimed he had retained no ability to flirt, he sure could turn you into a puddle of goo with just a look and a few words.

“Why, it’s nice to see you too, Y/N,” a sudden voice to your right interrupted. “I’m doing fine, thank you for asking. And I’m looking mighty fine tonight also, not that you noticed or anything.”

Sam sniffed in mock offense, turning his nose up and looking slightly away from you and Bucky. However, despite his peeved stance, he couldn’t hide the mirth dancing in his eyes.

“Of course, how rude of me!” You exclaimed in faux horror. “Why, you look absolutely dashing, my dear Samuel,” you jested with the best English accent that you could possibly muster. “And you, as well, darling Steven,” you continued to the highly amused Captain standing beside Sam.

“Alright, that’s enough,” Bucky cut in, drawing your attention back to him. “No more calling other men dashing or darling.”

“Awe, is the wittle Winter Soldier jeawous?” Sam mocked, imitating a baby voice and drawing a scowl out of Bucky.

“Of course not,” you cut in before your boyfriend could respond. “Because he knows that I only have eyes for him, right baby?” You questioned, wrapping your arms around his torso and blinking sweetly up at him.

A slow smile spread across his face as he gazed down at you, taking in your loving expression and giving you a look full of adoration in return. “Absolutely, sweetheart,” he murmured, leaning down to press a sweet kiss to your eager lips.

A gagging sound suddenly interrupted your sweet moment. Turning your head to the side with a raised eyebrow, an obviously disgusted Sam came into view, pretending to choke back vomit. “Save it for the bedroom, you two. No one wants to see that.”

“Sam!” You exclaimed in shock.

“What?” He questioned innocently. “No one wants to see that shit. Especially not me. Cap here agrees with me. Right, Cap?”

“Oh, no. Don’t drag me into your little drama here,” Steve stated, raising his arms up as if in surrender. “I know better than to get in the middle of your bickering.”

“We weren’t bickering,” you corrected. “We were just having a lively conversation, right Sam?”

Sam nodded over-dramatically, killing the illusion of innocence you were trying to create. “Absolutely, Y/N, just a fun back and forth between friends.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “Right. I’m going to go greet some of the other guests. Don’t get up to too much trouble now, kids.”

“Yes, dad,” the three of you chorused sarcastically together.

Rolling his eyes one final time, Steve set his drink down on the bar counter and walked away from your little group.

“Well, this was fun,” Sam announced. “But it’s about time I go and search out some female companionship of my own, if you catch my drift,” Sam winked.

Shaking your head at the oversized child in front of you, you waved him away. “Yes, yes, we know what you mean. Just get out of here.”

Throwing one last mischievous grin your way, Sam sauntered off, finally leaving you and Bucky alone.

Turning around in Bucky’s arms, you placed your chin on his chest as he smiled down at you, his grip on your hips tightening. “Finally,” you smiled. “I thought they’d never leave.”

Bucky smirked at you. “Careful there, doll. You’re gonna get me into trouble saying stuff like that and looking the way you do.”

“Maybe I like trouble,” you purred coyly, running your hands up and down his muscular chest.

Bucky sucked in a breath, but couldn’t hide the grin he was sporting.

“You’re the definition of trouble, sweetheart,” Bucky teased affectionately, pinching your side teasingly.

“But you love me anyway,” you sing-songed, a twinkle in your eye as you gazed up at your adoring boyfriend.

“That I do, doll, that I do,” he replied softly before pressing his lips to yours in a sweet kiss.

***

About an hour later, the party was in full swing with most of the guests having arrived and already finished a couple rounds of drinks. You and Bucky had split up not too long ago with him going over to talk with Steve and Sam and you spending time catching up with the girls, yet that didn’t stop the two of you from sending flirty little looks to each other every few seconds, something that definitely didn’t go unnoticed by Natasha.

“You two are disgusting,” Natasha grimaced after watching Bucky bite his lip and send you a particularly suggestive look, which consequently sent you into a fit of excited giggles.

Pulling your attention away from your super-hot and distracting boyfriend, you glanced at your friend, red creeping into your cheeks as you realized you and Bucky hadn’t been very discreet with your flirtations.

“What?” You questioned innocently. “He’s just too damn attractive, Natasha. I can’t be held responsible for how I react to that man’s adorable, yet sexy looks.”

Natasha rolled her eyes, used to your fawning over Bucky.

“I happen to think you two are adorable,” Wanda cut in, smiling at you. “You both deserve to be happy, especially after all that you’ve both been through.”

A softer smile appeared on your face as you thought about Bucky and your relationship. When you had first joined the team and met the infamous Winter Soldier, he was like a ghost. Bucky was just a shell of a man. He was simply existing, going through the motions. He wasn’t really living, only allowing himself to be consumed by guilt and self-deprecation. Even once you two had become closer and eventually started dating, Bucky always seemed to hold the attitude that he didn’t deserve anything good in life. He was hesitant around you, waiting for the world to snatch you away like every other good thing in his life. It had taken you so long to drill it into his stubborn skull that he deserved love, possibly more than anyone else, and that you were not going anywhere. Nothing and no-one could take you away from him. And although Bucky had made tons of progress and you were so unbelievably proud of him, you could still see that he struggled with insecurity and self-doubt, mainly when it came to your relationship. It was a bummer and definitely something that the two of you still needed to work on together because although your relationship was so strong in other areas, when it came to that basic trust and confidence in the other persons affection, there was a lack.

It was hard, but it was something that you and Bucky were working on together and you knew the fight would be so worth it. He was worth it. It was only getting him to believe that.

“I’m definitely very lucky,” you finally responded back to Wanda, eyes trained on your boyfriend as he gazed back at you, a look of adoration plastered across his face.

However, that look was short-lived as a young man approached you, pearly white teeth flashing and a charming pick-up line already on the tip of his tongue.

Unfortunately for this guy though, there was only one man that you had eyes for. You quickly, yet politely shooed the man away and eagerly turned your attention back to your boyfriend, hoping that he would give you some sort of signal that he was ready to duck out of this party and return to your shared room for a bit of fun of your own. However, when your gaze turned back to Bucky, his head was down and fists clenched, an unreadable expression marking his face.

Frowning, you searched the area, looking for any indication of what possibly could have upset your boyfriend in the span of a few moments. Finding nothing, you quickly excused yourself from the girls and made your way over to him, hoping to talk and figure out what was wrong.

Carefully, you reached out a hand and grasped his elbow, leaning into him, hoping to offer some comfort. “Hey,” you murmured softly. “You ok?”

Bucky looked down at you, eyes searching yours for answers you didn’t yet know, but desperately wanted to give him. Anything to get that sad expression off his beautiful face.

“Damn, Agent Y/N, you’re a magnet for these young bachelors tonight! We were just telling Bucky that he better watch out. That was, what? The fourth or fifth guy to approach you tonight?”

Suddenly it all clicked. Bucky was insecure. He had seen several men approach you tonight and surely whatever idiotic comments Sam had been making hadn’t helped. But he must have seen how quickly you brushed them off, right? He had to know that you had eyes for him and him alone.

Steve, sensing the seriousness of this moment, grabbed onto Sam’s arm to drag him away and give the two of you some privacy. “Come on, Sam, let’s give these two some peace and quiet.”

You watched as the two soldiers stepped out of hearing range before turning your eyes back toward your boyfriend, frowning at the sad, uncomfortable look on his face.

“Is that what has you upset?” You questioned, wanting confirmation from him before continuing. “Were you upset that those guys approached me tonight? If so, you have to know that I didn’t pay them any mind, Bucky. I’m your girl and your mine. That’s it. I would never even dream of looking at another man.”

“No, I know,” Bucky interjected quickly, not wanting you to doubt his faith in you for even a second. “I know you would never do anything like that, Y/N. Believe me, I know.”

“Then what is it?” You questioned, bringing your hand up to his face to caress his cheek.

Bucky leaned into your touch, closing his eyes briefly before opening them once again to meet your concerned gaze.

“I just worry sometimes that you’ll see one of these young, good-looking guys and see how much easier it would be with them,” he admitted. “They don’t have a ton of baggage like I do. You could have a much more normal life if you chose one of them,” he swallowed, breaking his gaze and looking out across the room as he continued speaking. “You wouldn’t have to deal with me waking up screaming every other night. You wouldn’t be held back at social events to babysit me and make sure I don’t have a breakdown because of the anxiety. You wouldn’t have to deal with the judgmental stares when you go out in public together.”

Bucky released a slow breath before returning his gaze back to yours. “And there’s so many other reasons,” he sighed. “And I’m so scared that one day you’re going to realize that the hassle isn’t worth it anymore. That I’m not worth it,” he shuddered. “And I couldn’t even blame you if you decided that. You would have absolutely every right to - “

“Ok, that is enough,” you cut him off, voice stern and eyes blazing as you looked your beloved, yet incredibly stupidboyfriend in the eye. “You are not a hassle or a burden or unworthy, or any other ridiculous thing you have convinced yourself that you are. You are nothing but worthy and selfless and brave and kind and wonderful. And I am so, so, sounbelievably lucky to love you and to be loved by you. You have no idea how happy and complete you make me. You seem to think that you were this mess before we met and my life was perfect, but I’ll tell you something Bucky, it wasn’t. My life was empty and it was hollow and it was purposeless. Until I met you. And you completely turned everything around. Suddenly, my life was full of light and love and beauty. And Bucky, baby, that is all because of you,” you cried, pouring your every emotion into your words, hoping that that would convince him of how entirely you meant your words.

You brought your other hand up to his face, so you were now cradling it in both of your hands. Your thumb gently swiped his cheek, clearing away the tears that had fallen at your words.

“My life is infinitely better with you in it,” you stated firmly. “And don’t you dare doubt that for even a second. No one could ever compare to you. I can’t even look at another guy, even if I wanted to, because my heart and head and everything that I am is so consumed by you. Always. Ok?”

Bucky sniffed, tears still pooling in his eyes as he struggled to form words after your little speech. Finally, after realizing that he wasn’t going to be able to form an adequate response to your declaration, he simply nodded. “Ok,” he smiled. “Ok.”

“Ok,” you responded, a small smile appearing on your face. “Good. Now that that’s settled, shall we get out of here?”

Bucky let out a booming laugh, pulling you into his arms and pressing a kiss to your neck. “Yeah, doll, let’s get out of here.”

Grinning, you pulled away; however, before you could say anything more, a young man, wearing what looked like an incredibly expensive suit walked up and tapped you on the shoulder.

“Hey, beautiful,” he smiled. “Would you care to dance?”

You stared at the man in disbelief, unable to comprehend the boldness of this guy. Clearly, you were here and already taken with somebody. What on earth made him think that this would be an acceptable thing to do? And especially after you had just reassured Bucky. You were afraid that your little speech hadn’t really had time to take and that this incident would send Bucky back into that pit of self-doubt.

However, you were pleasantly surprised when Bucky wrapped his arm around your waist possessively, pulling you closer to his body before placing a lingering kiss to your cheek, dangerously close to your mouth.

“Sorry, pal,” Bucky drawled. “She’s got everything she needs right here. Now, get lost,” Bucky commanded before bringing one of his hands behind your head and guiding your mouth to his in a passionate kiss, mouth immediately opening and tongues meeting in a fight for dominance. After a few moments, Bucky pulled away, leaving you breathless.

“Wow,” you finally stated after gaining your composure. “Glad to see my little pep-talk worked.”

Bucky blushed, a bashful smile appearing on his face, a direct contrast to the sexy, suave super soldier who had just grabbed you and claimed his territory in front of every man in attendance at this party.

“Don’t worry,” you murmured, wrapping your arms around Bucky’s waist and gazing up at him. “I found that little display of yours incredibly sexy.”

Bucky’s eyes darkened as he returned your lustful gaze. “I think it’s about time I took you up on that proposition from earlier, doll. Let’s get out of here.” He grinned suggestively.

Face lighting up in excitement, you grabbed his hand and followed him out of the huge room, ready for a night of love and passion in order to remind each other that you were his and he was yours and nothing and no-one could come between you two.

“Let’s.”

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes drabble #bucky barnes oneshot #marvel fic #bucky fluff #bucky angst #marvel #mcu #magicalmarauder #insecure bucky #bucky barnes smut

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creativewritingpracticestudio · 5 years

Text

You’re The Only One (Insecure!Mick Mars x Reader)

@mickonmars sorry for the wait! Thank you for the romantic smut request💓 note: this was written with the real Mick Mars (older) in mind, but if you really want to you can imagine The Dirt! Mick.

Basically, you’re the much-younger girlfriend of Mick Mars; the two of you are out, you get hit on by a man closer to your age, and Mick starts to feel insecure about his age and appearance and is scared you’re gonna leave him. At home, you catch him judging his body in the mirror, and decide to show him that there’s nothing for him to be insecure about.

Romantic, passionate smut! Cursing.

“Mick, baby, hand me that shopping list, would you?” You smiled gratefully at your boyfriend as he fished around the cart for the list and dutifully placed it in your hand. “Thank you! Let’s see what all we got so far. Eggs?” Mick nodded. “Check.” You went down the list of the various items until you got to the end. “Looks like we got it all! Alright, let’s go checkout. Thank you for helping me, baby!” You pecked him appreciatively on the lips, and he smiled.

The two of you made your way to the check out line, checked out your groceries, and walked towards the entrance, holding hands as you listened to Mick talk about the upcoming tour that him and the rest of Mötley Crüe had set. You smiled affectionately as he went on about how much he was ready to be back on stage again. He was absolutely adorable when he got excited, and you loved little moments like this between the two of you-and then the moment was ruined.

An arm that definitely wasn’t Mick’s slid around your waist, and you whipped around defensively, pulling the arm off of you and glaring at the harasser. It was a tall man, about the same age as you, wearing gym shorts and a wifebeater tank. Oh great, the official outfit for assholes. The man flashed you a sleazy grin and eyed you up and down. “Hey there, gorgeous.” You glared at him and instinctively stepped closer to Mick.

“Um, hi. Do we know each other?” He smirked and shook his head. “No, but we can definitely get to know each other, if you want.” You shuddered with disgust and grabbed Mick’s hand, feeling the anger radiating off of him. “Not interested, sorry. I’m taken.” He stared at your boyfriend with a look of disbelief. “You’re joking, right? You’re dating him? Thought he was your grandpa. Come on, baby, he can’t have that much money. Come spend some time with me, at least my dick works.”

Your face flushed with anger, and you defensively squeezed Mick’s hand. “Excuse me? I don’t even fucking know you, thanks. Insulting my boyfriend won’t get you into my pants. And don’t fucking insinuate that I’m with him for money. I’m with him because I love him. Mick is ten times more attractive than you’ll ever be, and he clearly has a hell of a lot more respect for me, and for all women, than you do. Not to mention, his dick is probably twice as big as yours, jackass. Get fucked.”

The man’s jaw tightened, and you could tell you’d embarrassed him. He glanced back and forth between you and Mick, throwing out a half-hearted response. “I was just being friendly. Keep your old-ass fucking sugar daddy. Enjoy his erectile dysfunction, bitch.” He stormed off, and you breathed a sigh of relief. “God, what an asshole. Come on, baby, let’s go home.” Mick watched the man leave with a strange look, and turned to you with a guilty expression. “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything when he did that. I didn’t want to make things worse”.

You smiled reassuringly and kissed his cheek. “Don’t worry about it, Mick. I don’t want you to get hurt, I could take him on my own. He’s just a dick. Sorry he said all of that to you, baby. None of it’s true, he’s just a jealous asshole. Okay?” Mick nodded, but he looked unconvinced. A look of worry flashed across his face for a second, but he quickly wiped it off, and you pulled him towards the exit. “I’ll put the groceries up at home, and then I’ll start the cake!”

————————————————————

You heaved the heavy grocery bag onto the counter and began to pull its contents out onto the countertop; milk, sugar, flour, eggs. “I think I’m gonna go lie down for a while, my love.” You glanced back at Mick, confused. “Are you alright, baby?” He nodded unconvincly, and walked off towards the stairs before you could question him further. You watched him go, a worried expression on your face. Even with his condition, he didn’t nap often. But, you brushed it off. He was probably just tired from the long day of errands.

After 30 long minutes of cracking eggs and measuring flour and pouring sugar and mixing it all up, your hands and body were sore. You tiredly put the cake in the oven, set the timer, and dashed up the stairs, deciding that a cuddle-session/nap with Mick was desperately needed. You tiptoed to the door, not wanting to wake Mick, and pushed open the door, your body instantly waking up at the sight before you.

Mick, rather than in bed asleep, was standing in front of your full length mirror. His eyes were trained on his reflection, a look of sadness on his face. He hadn’t even noticed you walk in. Your heart practically broke in half. He looked almost..disgusted at himself. “Mick? What are you doing, baby?” Mick glanced up, startled, and quickly stepped away from the mirror.

“Nothing, (Y/n). Don’t worry about it.” You frowned, reaching out to grab his arm before he could walk out. “Mick. You can’t just keep shit to yourself like this. You can talk to me. I love you, and I want you to be okay. So you need to tell me what you were just doing. Why were you looking at yourself? Is it because of the guy at the grocery store? Talk to me.” He was quiet for a minute, but finally spoke, his voice wavering slightly. “Do you think I’m ugly?”

You were speechless. Mick had never been one to care too much what other people thought of him, much less of his appearance. If I ever see that man at the grocery store again, I’m castrating him. “Mick, baby, why would you ever think that? Of course I don’t think you’re ugly. I think you’re the most handsome person in the world. Do you think you’re ugly, baby?” He glanced over at his reflection, that same sad look appearing on his face. “Sometimes. I don’t know, that whole thing at the grocery store just kind of made me think. Sometimes, I don’t even know why you’re with me.”

He lowered himself onto the edge of the bed and buried his face in his hands. You walked over, kneeling in front of him on the bed, gently prying his hands away from his face and forcing him to look at you. “Mick, baby, don’t look away from me. Listen to me. I love you. Not that asshole at the grocery store, not anyone else. That’s why I’m with you. I think you’re handsome, and kind, and a brilliant, talented-ass guitar player. And you love and respect me like no one else. You’re an amazing fucking human being, that’s why I love you.”

He looked shocked, but you weren’t done. “And anyway, that bitch was probably just jealous of you. You’re not a fucking grandpa, don’t let anyone tell you that shit. Look at you! You’re so fucking sexy, baby. No one turns me on like you do, no one makes me feel as good as you do, no one is as amazing in bed as you. I don’t care if anyone else thinks so, because I know so. I’m the luckiest fucking woman on earth. Don’t ever forget that. Okay, baby?”

You leaned forward, kissing him gently on the lips, stroking his cheek with your thumb. You pulled away, resting your forehead against his, and he smiled softly. “I’m a lucky fucking man, my love. The luckiest in the world. I don’t know where I’d be without you.” You laughed, planting kisses on his neck and tousling his hair. “Who knows, baby? I don’t want to imagine my life without you.” You paused for a second, an idea popping into your head. “...You know, that cake won’t be done for another 30 minutes...”

You grinned up at him mischievously, hand slowly trailing down his chest to rest on his thigh. He breathed in deeply, watching you with an excited look on his face. You could feel his cock hardening underneath your hand, and gave it a gentle squeeze. He moaned softly, and you leaned up to whisper in his ear. “Want me to show you how much I love your body, baby? Would you like that? Show you how good you make me feel?” You nipped at his ear, voice dropping to a seductive tone, and he nodded quickly.

“Words, baby, use your words.” Mick managed to choke out a quick “Yes, please, fuck,” and you hurriedly unzipped his pants, reaching in to pull out his already hard cock and balls and giving his shaft a few quick pumps to bring it all the way up. He responded accordingly, a flurry of curses leaving his lips as you rubbed your thumb over the tip and pressed down on the leaking slit. Your hands momentarily left his erection, sliding up his chest to pull off his shirt in one quick motion.

“Fuck, baby, look at you!” You kissed up and down his shoulders and neck, and made your way down his chest, coming back down to gently tug at his pants. He took the hint, lifting his hips up so you could pull them off, and then leaned back slightly on his elbows. You pumped his cock a few more times and then leaned down to lick a stripe up his shaft. He groaned loudly, gently pressing your head down further, a silent plea to take him into your mouth.

You obliged, taking more of Mick’s cock into your mouth as you licked at the sensitive head and slurped up the precum from his tip. You managed to take it all the way into your mouth, trying your best not to choke as you swallowed around his dick and rubbed his balls with your free hand. “Fuck, fuck, you’re so good at this, (Y/n). I don’t wanna cum yet, baby.” You pulled off of his cock with a pop, stood up, and gently pushed on his chest until he was laying flat on the bed.

“Let me do all the work, baby! Just sit back and relax.” You grinned at him as you pulled your shirt off, throwing it on the floor and following after with your bra. Mick eyed your breasts longingly, and you crawled on top of him, careful not to put too much pressure on him. “Grab them, Mick. They’re all yours.” His long, cold fingers nimbly pinched and rubbed at your nipples, and you moaned softly as he took one into his mouth, sucking on it gently.

He switched to the other one, giving it equal attention, and then moved his hands down to your skirt, reaching underneath to pull your panties down. You helped him out, yanking them off and throwing them to the side, exposing your sensitive, dripping pussy to the cold air. “Don’t take the skirt off, it looks good on you. Just pull it up for me.” You smirked, reveling in how sexy he was when he took control. “Okay, baby. Whatever you say.” You hiked the skirt up just enough to expose your swollen pussy, leaning back down to kiss him.

His hands gripped your hips, trailing down your thighs until his finger pressed against your dripping heat. You moaned softly, bucking your hips against it until it dipped into your pussy and brushed your clit. “Fuck!” Mick watched in awe as you began to fuck his fingers, stretching your pussy out around the digits as your juices dripped down your legs. You stopped yourself before you came, deciding you had to have Mick inside you.

“Want me to ride you, baby? Want to watch me stretch out my tight little pussy around your dick while my boobs bounce around in front of your face?” He nodded eagerly, grabbing your hips for support, and you steadied your entrance above his dick, teasing the head against your lips for a moment before slamming your hips down, taking his cock all the way in. He groaned, squeezing at your thighs as you pulled yourself back up and then slammed back down, gaining a steady pace.

Your breasts bounced around wildly as you pulled yourself up and down on his dick, feeling it hit your g-spot perfectly every time. You could feel Mick slowly coming undone underneath you, his cock twitching inside your pussy and his hips bucking up just slightly. You pulled off and then adjusted yourself to a different angle, feeling it hit your clit even harder as you fucked him. A knot formed in your belly, and your legs started to shake as your pace became sloppy.

“Fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum!” You threw your head back and cried out as you came harder than you ever had, practically seeing white as cum dripped from your pussy and coated his cock. “You’re so beautiful, (Y/n).” Mick stared at you adoringly. He still hadn’t cum, and you were determined to give him an amazing orgasm, so you continued to ride him, eyes practically rolling back from overstimulation. “Cum for me, baby. Cum inside me, I want you to fill my pussy up!”

Finally, he came, hot spurts of cum filling you up as he buried his face in your neck and whimpered quietly at the blissful feeling. You pulled off and collapsed next to him, pulling his body flush against yours and staring him in the eyes as you stroked his cheeks and hair, helping him come back down. “You’re so handsome, baby. You make me feel so good. No one else will ever make me feel the way you do, okay? My body and my heart belong to you. I love you, Mick.”

You kissed him on the forehead, and he smiled. “Thank you, my love. I love you too. I’m exhausted, for real this time. Think we could get in a nap before that cake is done?” You laughed, wrapping your arms around him and pulling his head against your chest as the heat from your bodies lulled him sleep. Fuck what that guy at the grocery store said, and fuck anyone else who judged your relationship. Mick was all that you wanted, and everything you needed. And God, you loved him so much. That afternoon, the two of you slept better than you ever had.

The two of you slept so well, in fact, that you missed the timer and the cake burned. Instead of going to the trouble of making a new one, you and Mick just shared a carton of ice cream, fucked on the couch, and called it a day.

#mick mars x reader #mick mars #mötley crüe #motley crue #mötley crue #tommy lee #nikki sixx #vince neil

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samcedesvegas · 4 years

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Movie Set || Samcedes || Mercedes Trailer

Mercedes Jones made her way onto the set, today was the first table read for her new Romance Comedy, which she was thrilled about. She had cameos and guest star spots. Even as a supporting actress in a blockbuster hit but to be the Leading Lady in her own movie, that was huge. Acting wasn't her first love but it was a fun distraction. She was fresh off her Every Woman Tour and ready to work.

Walking into the big conference room, she and her Manager/Best Friend Tina were the first ones there. Taking off her sunglasses and smoothing down her purple and pink tie dye Jersey Dress she sighed. "Still can't believe we are here. We are doing this." Tina smiled. "Well you are ready, you know your lines, and your co star is pretty hot right now."

Mercedes took her seat and grabbed her script looking back over it. "Yeah well hot and a playboy doesn't really make you a great actor now does it? But I won't judge..." She lied she totally would judge him, she knew his reputation. All men were dogs, period. And that included her dog of an ex who dumped her and got right with a groupie. Jackass.

Reluctantly, Sam Evans spent the latter part of his evening indulging in countless free shots of tequila. He felt like crap but luckily his bloodshot eyes were hidden behind dark Ray Bans. He pulled the hot coffee cup away from his lips, regretting how much he seemed to indulge in the perks of his newfound fame last night.

From the rural plains of Tennessee to sunny Los Angeles, Sam could finally say he made it. Where he was from, not many people did. It was either a nine to five at the piggly wiggly, prison, or a grave. There was no in between in that small town. Sam had played his fair share of smaller roles but this was the one. His entire team was sure of it. So, he was going to make sure no one knew how hungover he was. Especially not his beautiful songstress of a co-star. The last thing he wanted was to make a bad first impression on her.

Mercedes felt her phone vibrate, another photo of her ex Gabriel Norris with another female. The Quarterback was certainly enjoying being single. She rolled her eyes as she glanced up watching people filed inside, they were supposed to be "mingling" to get to know each other. Personally Mercedes wasn't really looking forward to it. She put the script down as Tina told her to be nice and moved over to her costars. Their conversations though, were not what she wanted to be a part of.

Her "best friend" in the movie was played by Jane Hayward, a lesser known actress but from what she heard, the girl was good. Not wanting to interrupt their riveting conversation about the best bars, she turned to see her love interest Sam Evans standing alone. Walking over to him she extended her hand. "I guess we are working together." she said a little more flat than she intended.

The room full of people gave Sam a small inkling of anxiety. This wasn’t his first rodeo, he’d done a host of tv sitcoms and supporting acting roles before but this was his first leading role. That made him nervous as hell. But he was an actor so it was easy for him to paint on the brave face. After all that was his area of expertise. This was the moment he worked his entire career for and he wasn’t going to ruin it by being a complete spaz.

“Guess we are.” He smiled extending his own hand to meet hers. Again, he was trying not to be a spaz but he couldn’t contain his excitement. He’d been around his fair share of celebrities but none as famous as Mercedes Jones. A force to be reckoned with in the music industry. Sam would shamelessly admit to having heard every one of her albums, even the ones from her girl group days. Didn’t hurt that she was also easy on the eyes. In his words...smoking hot. “Pleasure is all mine m’lady.”

Mercedes had to admit, the casting director did a great job at casting Sam. He had the look that was for sure. Tall, handsome, sexy, if she was into that kinda thing and at the moment she was not. He would get the girls and let's not be biased guys in just off his looks alone and she would have her own fanbase so as long as they did their part and gave a great performance the movie should do well. If Twilight could do it then so could they.

However the moment he spoke she understood why people called him a playboy. Those green eyes hidden behind a pair of sunglasses inside gave off a sense of coolness why his accent and tone would drive a woman crazy, yes he was a playboy and she would not be played by him. She pulled her hand away and nodded. "We should probably make a schedule to see if we can run lines together. Make this process as painless as possible."

A lady who was about her business, Sam could definitely appreciate that. The women that seemed to keep him company as of late were all either brainless supermodels or dense socialites that wanted nothing more than the perfect photo op. Be seen on his arm and boost their own careers. Not saying he got nothing out of it, he was a man with needs of course. But this was certainly a breath of fresh air. A woman of substance. But he was going to hold off on the questions about her girl group breakup. Those questions had been lingering around in his head for years.

“Oh sure, but I’m totally not good with numbers, dates, and all that junk so I’ll follow your lead.” As they took their seats, Sam couldn’t help but admire her natural curves. In fact he was pretty obvious with his glaring. “So what made you wanna’ jump into my world? I mean it’s not like you need the gig. You’re already one hell of a star.” He complimented hoping it’d gain him some brownie points. Plus a little harmless flirting never hurt anyone...right?

Mercedes took her seat glancing at her script, they would be starting in about ten minutes and she was ready to get it over with. As Sam started to speak again she was at first appreciative that he wouldn't be that hard to work with, but then his next words caused her to roll her eyes. "His world"? was he serious? There went another person who felt because she had been singing for the last 15 years that she couldn't possibly act as well. What did people think Music videos were?

"Well gosh I guess I figured if brainless oafs could do it why should I give it a try?" She said annoyed. "Just because I am a singer, doesn't mean I don't have talent, because I do. I am a damn great actress and I earned this part. So don't go thinking I got it because I know the director or some bull like that!" she hissed.

“Whoa, whoa...I wasn’t saying that. I know you’re talented as hell. I’ve been following your career since I was a kid. Ever since Cinderella, I’ve been a fan. Sorry I wasn’t trying to offend you. Just curious is all.” Crap he was ruining his chances before they even started. Was it wrong that her sassiness kinda sorta turned him on? She was hot, she was feisty, and the woman knew how to speak up for herself. How could Sam not like that.

Taking a deep breath he began looking over his lines as well, dialing it back a bit. So clearly she wasn’t fond of his charm which wasn’t to be expected, but a decent man always knew how to bounce back. “What I meant was, what made you wanna’ do a movie? I mean your career in music is far better than anyone here. Didn’t think you needed anything like this.”

A fan. Great, not only was she stuck with the playboy of L.A. he was a fan. This was the man who was rumored to sleep with every female he worked with. They did a spread and then he made them spread, their legs. And Mercedes was not about to be a notch on his belt. She may have been dating a Quarterback but she was not easy, she prided herself on her reputation. Sam was bad business for her good girl image.

She cleared her throat turning towards him. "Lets just clear this up right now. I am not going to sleep with you. I took this job because I am a sucker for romance. This story where boy and girl fall in love but realize it too late, it's a beautiful love story about second chances. Yes you are hot which makes my job easier and your accent...well whatever but make no mistake the closest you are gonna come to getting between my legs, is the fake sex scenes we have on screen."

Sam was undoubtedly captivated by the songstress. The way she protested, yet still managed to acknowledge how hot he was extremely gratifying. As humble as he was with his career, his ego when it came to women was a whole lot bigger. Now he wasn’t the “womanizer” the media painted him out to be. Sam Evans was actually the biggest sweetheart. He didn’t get a kick out of smashing and dashing. He was a stand up guy. The man just enjoyed the company of women, was that such a bad thing?

“Look Mercedes, I in no way plan on getting between those beautiful legs of yours...unless you want me to. I know the tabloids can kinda make me seem like a player but that just ain’t true. I just crush a lot.” He chuckled hoping his little joke would lighten the mood. Of course he was attracted to Mercedes, how could he not be? She was fine, confident, and had a whole lot of attitude. “Seriously though, I want you to feel completely comfortable with me. So although it’ll be hard not to, I’ll dial back the flirting and keep this thing strictly business.”

Everything that came out of Sam's mouth was trouble. He was definitely a smooth talking player, but right now she was immune to him. No matter how hot he was and no matter what his accent was doing to her. She rolled her eyes at his comment. "Cute." she said going back to her script, this was going to be a long night.

The table read was not bad once they got started, they read through it fairly quickly, and even though Sam seemed like a player, he was a good actor, she could give him that. The last few days were met with getting acquainted, with getting their trailers and revisions, with trying her best to not let Sam know he was getting to her. She asked him to meet her in her trailer so they could go over the revision of the first scene they were shooting. It was a love scene that she was both regretting but looking forward to. Wearing a white and pink sundress she threw her hair up into a messy buy and put her glasses on going over the script and making sure she knew her new lines.

Sam had the paper with his lines clutched in hand as he walked across the studio lot to meet Mercedes in her trailer. He already had most of his lines memorized but he still jumped at the chance to have someone on one time with Mercedes. Even if they were just handling business. He actually enjoyed being around her. She was funny, quick witted, and kept him on his toes. Not to mention her smile. It did something to him. That smile could light up an entire room.

Sam did a quick breath check in his hand and ate a couple breath mints to be safe. He took a deep breath before knocking on the trailer door and awaiting Mercedes' answer. In the meantime he began doing his daily mouth exercises to loosen up his lips. Just in case she wanted to have a few practice runs at the steamy kiss on page three.

Mercedes closed her eyes going over the lines and then opening to see if she got them right. She was on a roll when she heard someone knock. Knowing it was Sam, she cleared her throat moving to the couch and smoothing her dress. "Girl stop! He's just a coworker, get over it." She shook it off reaching down and grabbing a piece of gum. "Come in." She said pushing her glasses up and going back to the script. She did not like Sam Evans; he was a playboy who she was not gonna fall for. Plus she was on a men detox.

Sam let himself in once he heard her voice from the other side of the door. Keep it cool he thought to himself as he closed the door behind him. Mercedes made it very clear that nothing would happen between them beyond what was written in the script but for some reason Sam felt differently. To him there was already an undeniable chemistry between them. He just had to get her to see it. In due time. “So where do you want me?”

Looking towards Sam she smiled softly. "You can sit next to me, we are filming page three tonight so we might as well make sure we know what we are doing. So let's get right to it." She opened her script to the page, just in case. "So remember these two are talking about love and life, looking out at the stars, they both broke up with their partners and are consoling each other."

She closed her eyes getting into the headspace. Opening her eyes she got into character. "You ever wonder if anyone in this world can truly be happy? I thought so...once, but now i am divorced and raising my son on my own, and I don't think it's possible."

Sam took his seat next to Mercedes and settled in comfortably. He placed the sheet with his lines on the table in front of them and turned to her. As she began her lines Sam kept his own rolling around in his head. Because of his dyslexia, reading off paper was never his thing. Luckily for him, he had the memory of an elephant so his strategy was to memorize and it usually worked for him. When he wasn’t staring at his co-worker.

“Crap wait, I screwed up. Start over.” He nervously shuffled as Mercedes repeated her line. Then a complete one-eighty. Sam transformed into Ryder Stone in that very moment. “I know they can. I felt it for years...my Isabel made me believe in love. After I lost her I still felt grateful that I got to experience true happiness in the first place. I keep that with me always.”

To say Mercedes was underwhelmed was an understatement, though once he started again, she could see him getting into character so she continued her lines as Brooklyn Myers. "Yeah but what you and she had, it was raw and passionate. Nate and I never had that and I suppose that's why it didn't work out. Hey, maybe if I followed you to school and not went on my own path we would have gotten together." She said as she laughed softly, looking past Sam as if really seeing their past and future. "I don't regret my son I never could, but I regret his dad. He never truly loved me, and now I wonder if anyone besides my family ever could." She glanced at Sam longingly before looking down to her hands, as per the script.

She was really good, not that it was surprising to him or anything. From the few short days that he’d known her she was always on top of her game. This was clearly no different. Sam reached out and titled Mercedes’ chin up with his index finger, following the script. “Maybe stop looking so far and stop thinking so hard. Nate was a prick and he didn’t deserve a good girl like you.” Their eyes were now locked on each other’s as Sam stroked his thumb against the smooth skin of her chin...not in the script. A strange flutter happened in his stomach. They were acting but for some reason he was really into it. Really really into it.

Mercedes' eyes met his, his word delivery was impressive and he was improvising which was working, maybe a little more than it should since she was melting against his touch. Eyes never leaving his she continued. "I am a thinker, you dream and I am practical. It's why we are best friends why we work. Why I love you." She said softly. "If the one man I thought loved me didn't deserve me, then who does?"

His eyes never left hers, it was like they were staring into one another’s souls. At first he wasn’t completely sure about the role but he definitely felt connected to the character now. “Maybe a man who’s been right in front of you all along. One who’s always been in your corner right or wrong.“ He paused before delivering his next line. “Brooklyn what if it’s us that’s meant to be? Has that ever crossed your mind?” He cupped her cheek lovingly, his face serious but soft at the same time.

She started at him for a moment letting it seem she was taking his words seriously. "Us?" She looked away from him, pulling away and standing. Thank goodness her trailer was basically a mini house so they could move freely. "I'm not-" she wrapped her arms around herself as the script said, since it was a cold night. "You don't have to pity me Ryder. I know Isabel was the love of your life and we all know you only get one."

He quickly got up meeting her in the center of the trailer floor. His arm resting on the small of her back. “Pitty? Never. Don’t you get what I’m trying to say? Brooklyn I love you...as more than just my best friend” He slowly turned her around to face him again. He stopped momentarily really getting into character. He had to because the next line called for his lips to meet hers. “Yes, I loved Isabel and I always will. But she’d want me to be happy. You’re that for me...” without hesitation he went in for the kiss.

Mercedes knew his hand on her back was coming, but what she wasn't prepared for was the way it made her feel. She closed her eyes gathering her bearings as he spoke. He turned her towards him and she stared up at him. She knew the kiss was coming, but she figured they would stop beforehand. She wasn't prepared for him kissing her. Even more so she wasn't prepared for the way it made her feel. She had to pull away before a moan hit her lips. "Umm okay, that was great but the kiss. It really needs work." She liked moving away from him.

Sam was taken aback because he was so sure that his kissing skills were definitely on point. He damn sure wasn’t expecting that reclamation but he was a man of pride. He wasn’t going to let her see him sweat. Removing his hand from her back, he shoved them into his pockets. “Please you know it was good.” He started with a smug smile on his lips. “You were really good though. Somebody’s been practicing their lines. A proud co-star.” He winked before plopping down on her couch. “So you wanna run it again? Or you think you’re good?”

There it was, that smugness that annoyed her. Nate had it and now she saw Sam did and she couldn't stand it. Turning towards him she folded her arms across her chest. She was gonna let him off the hook because yes she did enjoy the kiss but he was asking for it so she broke it down. It was good, not mind blowing. "Good? Your technique was sloppy, delivery was weak and F.Y.I. you don't have to use that much tongue right away. You wanna make her beg for more." She moved to her fridge and grabbed a water bottle. "And of course I am really good. Mercedes Jones doesn't do mediocre."

She was faking hard and Sam knew it. However, he was going to let her have her moment. Clearly she needed it. He had the best lips in town, who wouldn’t wanna’ kiss em? “Damn...that’s pretty harsh. But I’m a strong man, I can take a little constructive criticism.” He nodded with confidence. “So Uhh...what are you doing after this. A couple of us are going out for food and drinks. Y’know mingling and all that junk. You wanna tag along?”

She knew he didn't believe her and for good reason but for some reason she just couldn't get behind him being that cocky. It oozed off him like a stench and she wasn't here for it. "Can you? Cause it seems to me you are a man with a huge ego who can't possibly imagine a woman not wanting him. News Flash, you are not God's gift to women." She shook her head. "No I am good. I wanna run my lines a few more times."

She turned from him but stopped; she wanted to further prove her point and maybe kiss him just once more. "And by the way, this is how you give a mind blowing kiss." She said moving towards him and pulling him towards her. Her lips met his in a soft kiss at first and then deepened it pushing him against the wall as her arms wrapped around his neck. Her tongue swiped across his bottom lip before she took his lower lip and nipped it gently before pulling away and stepping back. "That is how you give a memorable kiss."

Indeed the kiss was very memorable, no denying that. Sam swore he’d lay off the flirting but he couldn’t help himself. That’s just the way he was around pretty ladies. But by the way she was shutting him down maybe she just really wasn’t interested.

He was fine with that. He wasn’t a pusher and he damn sure didn’t want to pressure her, that wasn’t his style. If anything were to happen between them he wanted it to be mutual. “I can stay here too and run lines, drinks will always be there. Plus I sorta wanna get this scene right. Since my kissing is so weak and mediocre.” He chuckled.

Mercedes watched him for a moment. Then moved back. "Fine if you really wanna get this right then let's go. But look it wasn’t bad it's just. You rushed in there like a preteen having his first kiss, not like a man in love who knows this kiss, this kiss is gonna determine if she loves him back. Ryder is putting everything on the line with this kiss. She stands in front of him. "Like this." She clears her throat. “Yes, I loved Isabel and I always will. But she’d want me to be happy. You’re that for me...” her hand went to his face, softly holding it there as she leaned in. "I love you." She improvised as she kissed him softly, gradually growing deeper. Then pulled away. "Now you try."

His blood was rushing to places and quick. Sam was lost in the kiss, so much so that he hadn't even noticed that she pulled away. He slowly opened his eyes and let out a breathless "Damn". That was the only way to properly describe the kiss from Mercedes. Though he was pretty sure nothing was wrong with his kiss before. He had to admit though, she was a damn good kisser. He cleared his throat and shook his shoulders as he repeated his lines once more and mimicked Mercedes' actions, except this time he fully committed. He dipped her back, planting a feverish kiss to her lips. "Hmm how about that?" he asked, lifting her back up.

Mercedes smirked hearing his response. Yeah she was good, and that kiss was fire. She stood back waiting for him and yeah the kiss was great but he still wasn't getting it. "Sam, now you are just over doing it, you need to connect with Ryder. With why he loves her. He's her best friend, she was always there for him and he knows he can depend on her, forever. Every touch and action proves that. It's a touch during a kiss." She said touching his face. "Now try it again but be in love."

Huffing under his breath he closed his eyes. He liked the way Mercedes seemed to push him. Was it because she saw his potential? Or maybe she was just as happy to keep kissing him as he was with her. Either way Sam had no complaints. “Yes, I loved Isabel and I always will. But she’d want me to be happy. You’re that for me...” He placed a hand softly on her cheek, caressing her soft skin. His eyes stayed locked on hers as he stared intensely. Her lips were in view and he just went for it. Pulling her face inches from his, he closed his eyes letting his lips work their magic.

Mercedes waited for Sam to start again, and was pleasantly surprised at the way he looked, the way he spoke. His hand on her cheek sent shivers up and down her spine, and his kiss proved that with a little work, Sam could make the most of his talents. His kiss, this kiss was amazing. It took everything in her not to go weak in the knees but she couldn't help herself wanting more. Her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer.

Sam wasn’t expecting for Mercedes to match his energy but she did. It took everything in him to break away, not even realizing his hands had fallen to her hips. “When we shoot that scene on Monday, the entire cast in crew are gonna’ be in awe. Totally gonna crush it.” He winked. “Now if you’ll excuse me I think you took off all my chapstick with that last one.” He joked as he pulled his hands off of her with a smile.

Mercedes let her hands fall, shocked at her actions, not missing a stride she shook her head with a smile. "Yeah, considering that I acted my ass off and you improved, I think they are gonna be shocked at your improvement." She teased. She walked over to her water and took a sip. "Do you want some water?"

Sam nodded as Mercedes supplies him with some water. Much needed for the amount of times they ran that kissing even. If she hadn’t made it clear that she had no intentions on falling for his charm, he would be pretty sure that she liked him. Maybe not on a deep level but the chemistry was undeniable. “You sure that was all acting?” He teased as he fanned himself. “Because woo! I’m impressed if so.”

Mercedes rolled her eyes going back to her water and sitting on the sofa. "Trust me you will know if I liked you. A real kiss from me, a real true Mercedes Jones kiss, it'll leave you speechless, it will make you lose all train of thought other than wanting to kiss me again." She said staring at him.

#glee #samcedes #samcedes 1x1 #mercedes jones #sam evans

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ofstarsandvibranium · 5 years

Text

Pull Over

Fandom: Marvel (Cop AU - SACS Universe)

Pairing: Chubby!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You and Bucky decide to try out a little roleplay...

Warning: smut, semi-public

A/N: tagging my chubby!bucky lover counter part, @cametobuyplums

You were driving down a rocky road. It was abandoned and the sun was setting. You usually don’t go this route, but you were desperate to get home to be in the arms of your love.

Your foot added more pressure onto the gas. Your speed increasing with every second, eventually surpassing the advised speed limit of the road. Your body was buzzing from excitement of seeing your love soon as well as from the couple of beers you had at the bar with your friends. So into getting home, you weren’t aware of the cop car that was hiding behind a tree and soon enough you saw those red, white, and blue lights flashing behind you.

You cursed to yourself as you pulled over to the side, coming to halt and putting your car in break. You kept your hands on the wheels and waited for the officer to approach you. Your heart was pounding in your ears. When the crunch of the rocky pavement became louder and louder and to a sudden stop, that was when you rolled down your window and looked up at the officer.

You innocently smiled at him, “How may I help you today, officer?”

He cleared his throat, leaning down to become eye level with you, “Ma’am, do you know how fast you were speeding?”

You shrugged, “Can’t say I do, officer-”

“Sergeant.”

“Sergeant...?”

“Barnes.”

“Barnes. Well, Sergeant Barnes, I’m sorry to say that I don’t know how fast I was going. My brain was just on autopilot. Lots of things on my mind, you see.”

“Like what, ma’am?”

You shrugged again, “List of things to do. Dishes to wash, bills to pay, boyfriend to fuck.”

“To fuck, eh?”

You nodded, “My boyfriend is quite the sex fiend. Looks like he’s quite the gentle, softy, and he can be, but really he’s such a beast in bed.”

Sergeant Barnes licked his lips, “I see. Well, that boyfriend of yours must be lucky to have a gal like you. You must tire ‘im out.”

You shook your head, “Not at all, sarge. He’s quite energetic and enthusiastic when it comes to our bedroom activities.” you lean in, face mere centimeters away from Sergeant Barnes’, “You see, officer, my boyfriend is a bit older than me. He says he’s an old man and all that, but he’s just as spritely as us young folk. A lot better than guys my age too.”

“You like older men, huh?”

“Very much and, if I may say...you’re very handsome, Sergeant Barnes.”

Barnes licked his lips again, his head looking left and right to see if any cars were coming his way, “Lemme tell ya something. How’bout we make a deal: you, uh, sample me some of your moves and I won’t give you a ticket.”

You looked at him excitedly, “No ticket, you say?”

He shook his head, “No ticket. Just a little slap on the wrist and a fair warning, and you’re off your merry way.”

You giggled and it just riled him up even more, “I can’t say no to that, can I?” you opened your car door to allow Barnes to get closer to you, “What would you like to sample, sarge?” you bat your lashes seductively up at him.

“Well, sweetheart, it seems like you like to talk a lot. Why don’t we use that mouth of yours for something else, hm?” his hands fumble with his belt, the metal clinking as he unbuttons his pants and pushes it down to reveal his hard, leaking cock, “Now, sugar, you’re gonna suck my cock like a good little girl. Got it?”

You nodded, “Yes, sarge,” and you immediately wrapped your fingers around Barnes’ length. You smirked when you heard a sharp inhale come from him and then a groan as you lowered your mouth onto his tip and down his shaft.

“Ah fuck, sugar, your mouth is fucking heaven.” he rests his hands on the top of your car, leaning in as you take as much of him into your mouth as possible. When your nose his the underside of his round stomach and you felt yourself begin to gag, you immediately pulled away.

Sergeant Barnes was having none of that, “No, no, sweet thing, you gotta take all of me. Come on. I thought you were a good girl.” You nodded and let Barnes guide your head back down onto his cock. A hand wove through your hair and he gripped tight, using his hand to maneuver your head up and down his length.

“Oh fuck yes, sugar. That’s it.” his eyes shut tight as he relished in the warmth and wetness of your mouth. One hand in your hair and the other in a tight fist on top of your car. Your head and his hips worked together as your mouth moved along his dick.

You looked up at Sergeant Barnes, the way that the golden hour shined upon him. The orange-gold hues making him look so goddamn sexy, highlighting his slightly chubby cheeks that were covered by his graying facial hair.

You moved your hand to your clothed pussy. Pushing up your cocktail dress that you wore to the bar and moving aside the lace thong you wore with it, to touch your wet and wanting core. Just when your fingers began to rub fast circles along your hardened nub, your hand was snatched away.

“I didn’t say you could do that, sugar. I was going to fuck your pussy after this, but looks like you won’t be getting fucked at all. Couldn’t even bother to ask if you could touch yourself. Use those hands only on my cock, sweetness, nothing else.”

You groaned in disappointment as one hand wrapped along the base of his dick and the other fondled his balls. He continued to fuck your mouth as you did so. His face scrunching up in pleasure.

“Fuck yes! That feels so fucking good. I’m gonna cum down that pretty mouth of yours soon, sugar. Just keep playing with my balls like that, shit, yes. Like that. Oh goddamn!” he slaps a hand against your car startling you, but you continued to let your mouth be used by Sergeant Barnes.

“Shit. Yes, yes! Gonna cum! Agh! FUCK!” he pulls out your mouth, but only slightly. His own hand jerking off his cock. White spurts of his seed landing inside your mouth, onto your tongue, down your throat. He continues to pump his own cock until he’s spent. He lets out a growl as your lips wrap around him one last time, sucking off any remnants of his debauchery. With an evident gulp, you swallow his seed, opening your mouth to show proof.

Sergeant Barnes bends down and presses a hard and rough kiss to your lips, “Goddamn, sugar,” he grumbles and then pulls away. You giggle as you help pull up his pants, zipping, buttoning, and buckling them back up again.

“So, Buck, whatcha think?,” you ask cheerfully.

Bucky wipes the sweat off his head, “Goddamn, sugar, that was probably the hottest thing I’ve ever done. Not to mention risky.”

You nodded towards his cop car, the small blinking light on the dash notifying you that the dash cam was still on and recording, “Think you can swipe this footage so we can rewatch it?”

Bucky chuckled, “I’ll see if I could bribe IT. Might take a lot since Parker likes to ask a lot of ques-”

“Sergeant Barnes, this is Wilson, do you copy?” Bucky’s radio interrupted him.

Bucky sighed, mumbling, “Sorry,” and replying back, “Barnes, here.”

“We got a 10-66 that may need back up.”

Bucky groaned as he replied, “Yeah. I’ll be there, Sam. Gimme ten minutes.” he doesn’t wait for Sam’s reply before lowering the volume on his radio, “Sorry, sugar, looks like duty calls.”

Your shoulders sagged in disappointment, “Damn. I was really hoping to finish this back home.”

He chuckled, “Tell me ‘bout it. But I’ll get going to get this done as quick as possible. I’ll let you know when I’m coming home. I want you ready for me, ‘cause I needa return the favor.” he bent down and pressed a gentle kiss to your lips.

You giggled, “I’ll hold ya too it, sarge.”

“I love you, sugar.”

“Love you too, sarge.” you gave each other a wave before driving away in your respective directions. A sergeant’s job was never done.

#Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky x reader #smut #chubby!bucky #sweet as cinnamon sugar

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gb-fics · 4 years

Text

Vibrations

Fanfiction:

Kiryuuin Shou x Kyan Yutaka (Golden Bomber)

Note: This fic is for the song “Shindou”, therefore the theme of (sound) vibrations.

Shou’s mobile buzzed.

He dropped the damp towel he had used to dust off his CD shelf and dashed over to pick up his phone from the coffee table.

His stomach took a weird little leap. Of course, Yutaka always messaged him around this time of day. Or earlier. Or later. There wasn’t really a scheme behind it, if Shou was being honest. He had tried to establish a rule, to reconstruct Yutaka’s daily routine based on his incoming messages. But for the most part, his schedule remained unpredictable.

It was Shou’s upper abdomen that felt weird. He didn’t understand why people referred to this feeling as having butterflies in their stomachs. To Shou, it felt like having heartburn. But happy. He was glad it only ever lasted for seconds after each incoming message.

He switched on the screen of his phone, curious how many messages Yutaka had sent him this time. Just one? Or two? Maybe even three?

He stared onto the LINE notification.

It was Kenji checking in on him.

Shou sensed something that felt like heartburn again. But sad this time. And somewhat angry. He wasn’t sure if he was angry at Kenji for leading him on, or angry at himself for getting his hopes up like that.

He swiped the notification to the right, so it would disappear from his screen. He didn’t feel like replying to Kenji right now. He would do so later.

Shou hated himself for how much he had wanted the message to be from Yutaka.

They didn’t message each other often, usually just once or twice a day.

But Shou looked forward to the messages too much. Yutaka’s texts where always interesting and funny and kind. Much kinder than he was in a face to face conversation in fact. They weren’t just messages Shou read and forgot about. He kept thinking about what Yutaka told him, wondered how he felt about those topics in return. He carried his messages around with himself at the back of his mind for the next hours and furrowed his brow, when he wasn’t sure about what to reply and smiled, when he remembered a funny line. Yutaka’s messages brought him through the day, especially at a time like this.

It wasn’t a reason to get so excited, though.

Since the messages made him happy, Shou assumed he was allowed to feel a little excited about them. But this strong, physical reaction was just getting ridiculous. Especially since it had been weeks now since the lockdown had started. It had felt new and exciting at first, but by now, the flavour of the new should have faded. By now, he should remember that it was just Yutaka he was talking to.

Still, his body reacted like he was back in high school and talking to his crush.

But Shou did not have a crush on Yutaka. Not really at least. He was just bad at telling honest affection apart from romantic involvement. Sure, he liked Yutaka. He had always liked Yutaka. He had founded a band with him. And their text messages lately had brought them closer together. It was normal to feel affectionate. It did not mean he had romantic interest in Yutaka, though. He was just craving the attention someone granted him, the interest Yutaka showed in what Shou had to say, the bare kindness of his encouragement.

Shou’s brain knew the difference perfectly well. His body, however, didn’t.

Usually, Shou’s brain was stronger than his body. Just when his body reacted this way – with heartburn and his pulse racing and his head feeling light and hot at the same time – hormones were set into motion and his body felt incredible happy, when he saw Yutaka’s messages. So, Shou’s brain started to associate Yutaka’s name on his mobile screen with happiness. Therefore, his brain reached the conclusion, that he liked Yutaka more than was reasonable – ergo had a crush on him – and it ordered his body to spill all kinds of romance hormones and those hormones confused Shou’s brain further. It was a vicious circle and sometimes it seemed as if his entire body had turned against him, to make Shou believe he was in love with Yutaka, although he knew that he wasn’t.

Shou sat down on the couch and stared onto his mobile.

He opened the LINE app. For some reason, there wasn’t always a notification when you received a message. Some error in the programming, he mused. Maybe, Yutaka had already replied to him, but Shou hadn’t seen it, because his mobile hadn’t informed him. Maybe he was missing out on Yutaka’s reply for unnecessary 18 minutes already, since the last time he had checked.

The message from Kenji was the only one unread.

Shou closed the app again and leaned back on the couch.

He was supposed to continue cleaning the shelf, but he couldn’t bring himself to get up and finish the work.

He was so bored. Lockdown made him bored with everything. Sometimes, he was too bored to do something, even if he had already started. The boredom seemed to lessen his concentration and he seemed unable to focus on any task longer than a few minutes. It made reading or even watching tv nearly impossible.

What he really wanted to do, was talk to another human being.

He could just check his messages again. See, if Yutaka had replied in the meantime. Admittedly, it wasn’t very likely. But it wasn’t about Yutaka this time. Shou just wanted to talk to someone. Anyone would be fine. He was just checking on his messages in general. He would be happy about any message, no matter from whom it came. Why was none of his acquaintances messaging him anyway? No one was checking in on him. It seemed as if the lockdown had made everyone forget about Shou’s existence.

Shou opened the LINE app again to see, if anyone would put him out of his lonely misery.

He realized he still had a message from Kenji, which he hadn’t even opened yet. He had forgotten about it.

Shou stared at the message for a long time. It only read “Hi, just wanted to check in on you. How are you?”

Shou realized that he had absolutely no motivation to engage in a conversation with Kenji.

He felt like a hypocrite.

He closed the app again and tilted back his head. He was still somehow angry at Kenji. He knew that it wasn’t reasonable. He had no right to be angry at Kenji for Yutaka not messaging him. He had felt so happy, when his mobile buzzed.

He really ought to get back to cleaning.

Instead, he closed his eyes and thought of men.

Shou was pretty sure that he was bisexual. Just sometimes, he forgot about it, because being bisexual was nothing like Shou had imagined it to be.

All the time while growing up, he had thought being bisexual was a third alternative to being gay or straight and that he would constantly be aware that he liked both men and women alike. He had thought his preferences would be 50/50.

But instead, Shou’s preferences changed. There were times when he could think of nothing but boobies and the smell of pretty women and the shape of their necks and he was completely convinced that he was straight. But then there were phases – and they usually came whenever there was a special guy in his life – where it was all broad shoulders and a crazily high consumption rate of gay porn.

Whenever those phases hit, Shou remembered every guy he had ever liked. Not his exes; Shou had never really dated another man. But he remembered how he had been too nervous to get out even one word in front of the cute friend of his brother in high school – divine dimples and the darkest eyes Shou had ever seen. Or how difficult it had been to meet the gaze of his former boss when still working at the convenience store – cheekbones, perfect cheekbones and something that Shou called ‘natural authority’. And he remembered that this with Yutaka right now was not just a moment of confusion, but something that had always been a part of him, although he forgot about it every time as long as it wasn’t urgent.

Currently, Shou only listened to male vocalists, because he loved their deep voices and how sexy they sounded, and every handsome actor on tv send him drooling as if he had never seen a man before.

Shou knew that he was going through one of his gay phases and he knew that it was because of Yutaka, most likely.

He had always thought that being bisexual meant feeling attracted to men and women alike, that it was 50/50. But Shou felt a 100% attracted to men. He also felt a 100% attracted to women.

It depended on his phase. The problem was, that those phases could change damn fast.

Shou might bump into a cute girl at the supermarket and she might smile at him and Shou would think of how soft her lips looked and how soft the curves of her body and how soft her skin and he would stare at her lips for far too long and think “damn, I’m so straight”.

And he might turn his head and watch a cute guy taking something out of a shelf and he’d stare at his hands, because wow, men surely had nice hands, so veiny and strong and masculine and Shou would think “damn, I’m so gay”.

Both thoughts could basically hit him within the same heartbeat and it was exhausting.

Because Shou felt damaged already. He was too greedy, too needy. He was looking for love so desperately, clinging to even the slightest display of kindness as if his dried-out heart could only be healed by another’s love. And he was a pervert, too. Thinking about sex all the time. Far more than the rest of the world for sure. Because if the rest of the world thought of sex as much as Shou did, humanity as a whole would never get anything done and they’d still be stuck in the stone ages today.

All this led to only one possible conclusion.

Shou wasn’t bisexual, not in the way that other people were at least. Because his desires seemed to be stronger than those of normal humans, Shou was both the straightest and the gayest person on the entire planet.

Sometimes, he wished to get a break from his own feelings. He didn’t want to be bi. He wanted to go to sleep.

Shou decided that he would check his mobile one last time and then he would go back to cleaning.

His phone would surely have buzzed, if Yutaka had messaged him within the last minute, but since he was about to go back to cleaning, he wouldn’t check his mobile in a while (ten minutes at least!), so it was only reasonable to check one last time.

Shou opened the LINE app.

He had two new messages aside from Kenji’s. They were from Yutaka.

Shou’s heart did a weird thing, where it stopped beating and then beat faster, or maybe it did nothing at all and Shou just imagined it, because his chest felt so strange suddenly, as if he was trembling on the inside.

Yutaka must have messaged him during the last two minutes. Shou’s first thought was, that Yutaka had looked at this chat only moments ago. He had thought of Shou, while Shou had sat here, thinking of him. They were soulmates! Their thoughts were basically synchronised! It was a sign of how well they went together! It was fate!

His second thought was, that it had been almost impossible for Yutaka to catch a moment where Shou didn’t think of him, or was not checking his phone. It wasn’t so much a matter of fate, as rather of percentage.

Shou closed the app without reading the message.

It wasn’t that he was scared of looking too eager. Yutaka usually read his messages pretty immediately. (Yes, Shou kept the chat open, to see when the notification would change to ‘read’.)

Shou didn’t read the message, because he needed to finish cleaning first.

It wasn’t that reading the message would be his treat. It was just, that reading Yutaka’s messages knocked him out for far too long and he didn’t get anything done afterwards, because his mind turned scatty and unfocused.

He usually read Yutaka’s messages once, greedy and curious. Then he read them again more closely, stopping at every paragraph to think about it properly. Then he stared into space some, thinking about his own opinions on the matter for a while. Then he read the message again, making sure he had not missed anything in it. Then he closed the app. Then he opened the app again and read the message again for the sheer comfort of it. Then he checked the time and realized he had no recollection of the last hour whatsoever. It was always the same.

Shou hated himself for being so unable to control himself and for being so unproductive and for feeling so strongly about Yutaka, when it was just Yutaka. At least, he could put off reading the message and force himself to get the minimum of work done that way.

Shou got up and went back to cleaning the shelf.

He kept thinking of the number two. Yutaka had sent him two messages. Shou wondered what they would say.

He also wondered what was the worst. That he hadn’t noticed how likeable Yutaka was for all those years already? That he was risking their friendship? Shou didn’t worry about the band so much. He was able to keep it professional. But if he fell for Yutaka, their friendship would be tainted. Of course, Shou did not intend to ever confess to Yutaka. But he would start to feel uncomfortable in his presence. Being alone with him would become painful. He would lose the intimacy between them, just by no longer bearing it. Or was the worst that Yutaka would not like him back?

Yutaka liked men. He had outed himself as bisexual to Shou years ago. He had been confident about it and not confused at all. Maybe it was 50/50 for him. Maybe Shou was fucked up. Maybe Shou was doing being bisexual wrong. Maybe that was why everyone else seemed surer about it. Shou wished he had Yutaka’s certainty.

The fact, that technically, it was possible for Yutaka to like him back, did not make it easier for Shou.

Should he try? If he liked Yutaka – which he still wasn’t sure about, because it would be a stupid thing to feel – maybe he could seduce Yutaka. Even if Yutaka didn’t like him now, Shou could try to charm him, flirt with him. Maybe Yutaka would fall for him, even if Shou wasn’t exactly the man of his dreams. Shou wasn’t handsome, but he was smart and talented and he was difficult to deal with, but he was loyal and generally kind, and if he could only convince Yutaka of his good qualities, maybe that would be enough to make him dateable. They had gotten along well for years already.

Shou imagined what it would be like to date Yutaka. How the staff would talk behind their back. How Jun and Kenji would look at them. What his parents would say, if he brought Yutaka home.

Shou loved the thought.

He knew that he shouldn’t, because all the scenarios were awful. But in a guilty pleasure reality tv show drama, he loved it. He imagined kissing Yutaka before a rehearsal. He imagined getting caught. He imagined how proud he would feel to get caught with a guy like Yutaka. He imagined how good it would feel to see that Yutaka wasn’t embarrassed, either. Because Yutaka would love him enough to take all the sneers and gossip and no matter what everyone said, with Yutaka by his side Shou wouldn’t feel ashamed for the life he was leading.

Shou knew that it was just a day dream fantasy he liked to entertain, of course.

Most of the time, he felt ashamed of the life he was leading already, even when he had nothing to hide.

Shou put away the towel and looked at his clean CD shelf. Well, that ought to be enough for today.

Finally, it was time to check Yutaka’s messages. He sat down on the couch again and opened the chat.

To be honest, my main problem

with not knowing what to tweet

about is that I don’t think I’m

very interesting LOL. I mean, I’m

doing stuff! I’m eating! If I made

a tweet, whenever I ate something

out of boredom, our fans’ timelines

would be FULL. I play videogames.

I read manga. But nobody cares!

I get, what you say about fans

wanting to know everything. I see

your tweets and I actually don’t

think they are boring. I get why people

would want to read them. But I

still can’t get used to the thought

of being a celebrity. I’m not Hyde! LOL

And even when someone I admire

posts about their breakfast, I

usually wish they would shut the fuck

up. Maybe it’s easier for you to imagine

the fans’ feelings, because you are more

curious by nature, aren’t you? You

always want to know what is going on

with the people you like. I just assume

the people I care for will message me

directly, if there is something in their

life I should know about. Maybe that’s

why my relationships always failed wwww

I wonder if I don’t care enough sometimes.

Wait, how did we end up here? I just

wanted to say, I don’t know what to

tweet about, because I feel pretentious

posting every time I yawn ^-^; I guess I’m

a little insecure, about why people would

find me interesting. I mean, most fans

like me for the crazy stuff I do on stage.

But you are the one writing most of our

performances. Maybe I should hire you

to write my tweets? Aren’t you jobless

now anyway? LOL

Speaking of which, it also hit me hard,

that all the concerts got postponed. I

really hoped we’d be able to go back to

normal in late summer. It really leaves me

at a loss for what to do with the rest of

the year, though I’m sure you little sadistic

bastard will come up with something to

keep us busy anyway ;; Since you are such

a workaholic, I can imagine that it must hit

you even harder. But I will try to take it as

an opportunity to rest, and you should do

the same. We’re not young anymore. Maybe

the time to relax and think of even new

concepts for the band is exactly what we need.

Aren’t people going to get bored with Kenji’s

ass sometime? We could try to think of

something new, to stay different and original.

Maybe we can get Kenji to show his balls next.

Or rather, the tv stations. Convincing Kenji

won’t be the problem LOL

And thanks for asking! I actually slept very

well the last night, too. I listened to you counting

sheep, but I feel asleep after just ten minutes.

Are you even doing the full ten hours?! No

one will ever know, everyone is asleep before

that wwwwww

Anyway, I’m feeling healthier now and more

rested. I guess touring was stressing me out. Or

your videos are really improving my sleep! I had

problems with it for so long and was always

tired, but now it’s all gone. Thank you,

Mr. Sandman ^-^

How have you spent the day? Hopefully you

weren’t all gloomy, because of the tour! Please,

watch some porn, to cheer yourself up LOL

Shou went to rereading the message. He wondered if Yutaka was right and Shou really was more curious than the average person – or at least more curious than Yutaka. Shou figured it was a nice way to say he had an obsessive personality and that Yutaka was absolutely right with that. Shou found it easy to imagine that his fans cared about what he cooked for dinner, because when he liked someone, he wanted to know what they ate, how many hours they had slept, whom they had talked to, what they had seen and thought and heard and smelled throughout the day. Because he was the worst and Yutaka knew. But he hadn’t pointed it out in a mean way.

In fact, his messages made Yutaka sound kinder, always. He sounded more vulnerable, too. Shou was sure, that in a face to face conversation, Yutaka would never have admitted to not knowing what to tweet about, because he didn’t find himself interesting enough.

Shou assumed that it was due to the format, that felt more like exchanging letters than having a real conversation. Taking your time to put your thoughts into words properly and not fearing a direct response made it easier to open up.

And Shou wondered if it was the format that made him like Yutaka to begin with. He liked vulnerable, honest Yutaka. He might even have a little crush on him. And maybe it was the real Yutaka indeed.

But that did not change the fact, that in real life, they would never be able to talk like this. Even on the phone, Yutaka would not say any of those things out loud. Shou probably wouldn’t either. Which meant, that his whole crush was a lie.

He liked Yutaka’s letters, not Yutaka. Hearing his voice, looking into his eyes, wouldn’t cause him nearly the same excitement as the buzzing of his phone did. Which meant that Shou was stupid and crushing on a fantasy construct build around only a small part of Yutaka and that construct would not outlast reality. It made sense, though. He knew Yutaka for so long already, if he liked the real him, he would have realized so long ago. He wouldn’t have needed a worldwide lockdown to make him realize his own feelings.

No, his feelings were based only on the soft and vulnerable parts Yutaka showed him in his messages currently. Admittedly, his messages also sounded a little rude sometimes. Reading them, Shou could imagine all too well, how Yutaka would sound while saying them out loud “Are you even doing the full ten hours?!” He’d say it angry and mockingly at the same time. He wouldn’t sound vulnerable, but the words had a different quality, when Shou knew how Yutaka meant them. The messages exposed a side of Yutaka, that Shou had not been aware of before. It made him regret his words at their last meeting even more. In real life, Yutaka hadn’t seemed bothered at all. But the Yutaka from the messages had probably been hurt. Shou had probably hurt him.

Shou left the chat and opened Kenji’s message instead.

“I’m good, thanks”, he typed. “Hope you are doing alright, too.”

Then he closed the app.

There. He wasn’t obsessed with Yutaka or anything. He hadn’t sat down immediately to answer to him. He had replied to Kenji instead. Therefore, he had proven himself that he did not care for Yutaka specifically.

Shou did not know why he had replied to Kenji at all.

He knew that he had done so to trick himself into believing he didn’t give special treatment to any of his bandmates. But since he knew he had only done so to prove a point, it meant that he wasn’t really in denial about his own motives, which again meant there was no point in replying anyway. He told himself a lie, although he already knew he wasn’t buying it. He might as well be honest with himself and admit that he had a horrible weakness for Yutaka.

Shou got up and decided to start preparing dinner. It wouldn’t take him long, because dinner would basically be meat with seasoning. He tried different seasoning every day. But he stuck to meat. Shou loved meat.

He got out his favourite pan and thought about Yutaka’s message.

Was Yutaka right, that Shou was more interested in people in general than Yutaka was? Was Yutaka’s indifference the cause of his relationships never lasting?

Shou tried to recall Yutaka’s past relationships, or what he had seen of them at least.

The memory made him feel queasy. He wasn’t directly jealous of Yutaka’s former partners, but they made him feel insecure.

Shou couldn’t answer Yutaka’s question from his own experience, because his dating experience was poor compared to Yutaka’s. He had never reached the point where it got really serious with anyone. He had never moved in with one of his girlfriends. He had missed out on a lot of things he should already have done at the age of 35 years. When it came to general life experience, Yutaka seemed to be older than Shou. Shou wondered why Yutaka even wanted to talk to him about such things. When it came to dating, planning a marriage or just making compromises in a relationship, Shou felt like a toddler. He had no interesting observations to offer to Yutaka in this regard.

Sure, Shou had other good qualities. When it came to their work, he was an expert. He took pride in the songs he had written and the stage programs he had come up with.

But when he talked to Yutaka about their daily lives, he still feared that Yutaka would deem him ridiculous at some point. In some areas, Shou was painfully aware of how underdeveloped he still was.

Shou also wondered, if Yutaka was right and he should use the sudden free time on his hands to think of new concepts for the band, to make sure they wouldn’t get stuck in certain routines too much. Golden Bomber’s biggest achievement was that they defied every set category. They had to watch out not to become their own category, either.

And Shou wondered, if his videos were really helping Yutaka with sleeping.

He knew that Yutaka had problems with getting a good night’s rest for years already. So, he had recorded the first video as a secret present to him, and to make up for what he had said.

He hadn’t expected Yutaka’s excited reaction, though. Yutaka had messaged him on the day of the first bonfire video, telling him how much it had helped him relax and how grateful he was. Somehow, they had ended up talking about what kept them awake at night, and the conversation had turned deep fast. They had exchanged the worries on their minds and then they had started to talk about the current situation and by now, the origin of the text messages didn’t matter anymore, because the topics kept changing and evolving anyway.

And because Yutaka had been so happy and excited, Shou had taken to record more and more videos.

Because the videos gave them something to talk about, too, and Shou made sure that their conversation kept going that way. And because Yutaka had actually looked rested during the last video conference and because Shou felt proud when Yutaka wrote him he was happy about a new upload, and because he wanted Yutaka to see him, to make sure he didn’t forget about him, while they were not meeting in person, although that was stupid of course, because after all those years, it wasn’t like Yutaka would just forget about Shou’s existence. And because he had wanted to apologize.

In the latest video, Shou had recorded his own voice for a change. He had sent it out to Yutaka to put him to sleep. And because he hoped that Yutaka would understand, what he really wanted to say with it.

I’m sorry I hurt you.

It would probably be easier to just write down the words and send them.

But then, Shou was scared of addressing the topic, because he still wasn’t sure about what had happened on the last day, they had seen each other in person.

There had been this cute girl from the staff again, who had talked to Shou a couple of times before. And because Shou was infatuated fast, whenever a cute girl took the time to acknowledge his existence, he had tried to impress her a little too hard. Shou was always bad at hiding his crushes. Yutaka shouldn’t have made fun of him in front of her like that, though. It had been rude. But it did not excuse the things Shou had told him afterwards. Yutaka wasn’t a good-for-nothing. He wasn’t dumb. He wasn’t ignorant.

But Shou was scared to tell him, that he hadn’t meant it, because then they would have to talk about that day. He was scared to ask Yutaka, why he had badmouthed Shou in front of the girl like that. He was scared that it might be, because Yutaka liked her, too. Now, that Shou liked Yutaka, he would be horribly jealous, if that was the case.

He was scared of Yutaka asking him, if Shou really liked her, too. Because he didn’t anymore. Not now, that he was chatting so intimately with Yutaka for several weeks already. But he couldn’t admit that. Because then Yutaka would know that Shou liked him, and things would turn weird and tense and Shou did not want to risk it.

So, he sent his voice out to Yutaka, saying other words than the ones he really meant. And the words faded away without reaching Yutaka, because Yutaka could not possibly understand what Shou was trying to say with them. His words were nothing but vibration in the air, because he couldn’t say what he really meant.

I’m sorry I hurt you.

Dinner was ready and Shou poured it into one bowl, that was big enough to hold everything he cooked, so he saved himself the trouble of having to clean several dishes afterwards.

He went back to the living room and sat down at the table. Before he started to eat, he fixed his mobile again.

He felt like a hypocrite, because Shou told himself constantly, that he wasn’t waiting for Yutaka to message him desperately. But he kept his phone on himself all the time, while he was waiting for Yutaka’s replies. As soon as Yutaka had messaged him, though, Shou forgot his phone lying around, as if he had suddenly lost all interest in it. His phone only mattered as long as Yutaka might text him.

Shou opened the LINE app. No new messages.

At first, he felt a tiny pang of disappointment, because he was so curious to hear Yutaka’s opinion on all the thoughts he had just had in the kitchen.

Then Shou realized that he hadn’t texted them to Yutaka yet and felt ridiculous immediately. Of course, Yutaka couldn’t read his thoughts through telepathy and reply to something Shou hadn’t written down yet.

Shou felt a little guilty for not replying faster to Yutaka. When it was the other way around, Yutaka could never reply fast enough for Shou’s means. Since he always took ages himself, he wasn’t mad at Yutaka for taking his time of course, but honestly, Shou wished Yutaka would text him every five minutes throughout the day. He couldn’t get enough of reading his texts and the giddy feeling they caused in his chest.

Shou ate in silence and wondered what he should do after cleaning the kitchen.

He could reply to Yutaka, but then, he’d rather take his time with that and wait for a moment, where he felt properly relaxed to focus on what he wanted to say. Typing the messages to Yutaka always took him quite a while, not just because they were long, but because he needed time to collect his thoughts while he did.

Yutaka had suggested Shou ought to watch porn to cheer himself up.

Maybe Shou should try that.

The thought, that Yutaka wanted Shou to watch porn was actually quite hot. Maybe he thought of Shou masturbating. Maybe the thought turned him on. Shou could send him a dirty message afterwards. Or even attach a picture. That would be sexy.

Shou loved sharing pictures of his dick. The thought of the other person seeing it turned him on somehow. Thinking that Yutaka would get aroused by the sight made Shou feel excited in return.

It would also be a good test, Shou thought.

He could put it as a joke. After all, Yutaka had brought up the porn first. And Yutaka had seen him naked many, many times before.

But it was also an offer to flirt. If Yutaka ignored the picture, or scolded Shou for sending it, Shou would know that Yutaka wasn’t interested in him and they could brush it off as a joke. But if Yutaka complimented his dick or wrote something dirty in return, Shou would know that Yutaka wasn’t opposed to him. He was pretty sure that Yutaka enjoyed their conversations as much as Shou enjoyed them. He just didn’t know if his messages caused the same fluttering in Yutaka’s chest, or if Yutaka spend way too much time thinking of Shou throughout the day, too. Yutaka’s reaction to a dick pic would make his feelings towards Shou a lot clearer – either way.

So far, it sounded like a good idea. But then Shou wasn’t sure, if he might not be crossing a line with that. Maybe it would make Yutaka uncomfortable, because he thought that Shou was sexually interested in him. Shou did not want Yutaka to think that. Unless Yutaka felt the same. Then Yutaka was supposed to think that by any means.

And what, if Yutaka just didn’t like Shou’s dick? It was a pretty good dick, at least there was nothing wrong with it. But maybe Yutaka didn’t find his dick sexy for some reason. Because it was too small or too big or not shaped the right way. Or because Shou was his friend and he couldn’t look at his dick objectively. If Yutaka didn’t find Shou attractive as a person, maybe he automatically wouldn’t find his dick attractive either.

All in all, sending a dick pic was a pretty bad idea.

Shou cleaned the kitchen and returned to the living room.

His mobile was blinking. The green light meant he had a notification from LINE waiting for him.

Probably Kenji, who had replied in the meantime.

Shou did not feel excited to check his phone at all.

Yutaka had already sent his reply. The message couldn’t be from Yutaka. Shou didn’t really feel like talking to anyone else.

He switched on the screen anyway to check.

He had three new messages from Yutaka.

Every single one of Shou’s organs took to tapdancing. He wanted to throw up. Why did he feel so excited? So nervous? He wished his body would calm down. Yutaka had messaged him thousands of times before the lockdown. How had those few weeks changed Shou’s feelings enough to provoke a physical reaction like that? He hated his body for not obeying to his mind and staying calm.

Shou opened the messages.

I was googling shit on the internet,

because I was bored. I found out that

this is a character from a children’s

program overseas. It made me think

of you immediately.

Below that was a picture of a life-sized loaf of bread with a face on it and arms.

According to Wikipedia, it’s a bread

with a gloomy personality and

depression LOL

Shou felt overjoyed.

The message itself wasn’t really great, admittedly, but Yutaka had texted him, before Shou had even replied to his last message. He had thought of Shou. Alright, he did have a good reason to message Shou about the bread character. With Shou’s love for bread, it was natural that Yutaka had thought of him.

But Shou still felt flattered and excited, that Yutaka had thought of him. He had read about a depressed bread and Shou had been the first person he had thought of, the first one with whom he had wanted to share his findings. He had seen the article and thought “I need to tell this to Shou”. It was a clear sign of affection. Solid proof, that Yutaka thought of him, even when they weren’t chatting at the moment.

Or just solid proof, that Shou was the only gloomy person with a strong love for bread in Yutaka’s life. Shou preferred the first option, though.

And Yutaka could have waited until his next reply, too. But he had wanted to share this with Shou so urgently, he had broken their natural text chain. It had to mean something.

Shou was aware that he was clinging to straws now. It was the picture of a bread, not a love confession.

But the sheer kindness of the words “It made me think of you immediately” overwhelmed him. Shou had always been bad at expression affection like that. Maybe that was, why all of his relationships had ended badly. He wanted to know everything about the other person, but he didn’t give much in return. He hid the words he really wanted to say under so many other words, that no one could hear them anymore.

He wished he could just text back “I’m happy you thought of me”, or “I appreciate you are not scared to let me know you care”. He felt appreciated by the short message and wished he could evoke the same feeling in Yutaka.

But then he thought of disturbing the routine they had established with their text messages so far and of appearing too clingy and of not finding the right words anyway and he closed the chat again. Shou sometimes hated being himself.

He wondered what to do next and decided to go for the porn. He could shoot some pictures, even if he didn’t know if he would share them with Yutaka yet. It was always good to have some back-up dick pics ready in case you needed them.

He thought of Yutaka looking at his dick and getting aroused. He imagined Yutaka touching himself.

Shou started to grow hard before he had even switched on his computer.

He could have switched on the VR headset as well. VR porn was pretty much the best thing that had ever happened in his lifetime. But today, he didn’t really feel like he needed the porn at all. He was just using it as an alibi. His thoughts were on Yutaka mostly, anyway.

He had bookmarked his favourite porn on his computer and picked one of the videos randomly.

Shou pulled down his pants and stroked himself lazily while watching the actress on the screen moaning and sighing. He did so until he was properly hard. It didn’t really take much for him. Shou was lowkey horny most of the time anyway.

He opened the camera on his phone and tried to get a good angle of his erection. He wasn’t proud of it, but he had a lot of practice at finding the right angle. As a celebrity, he shouldn’t have been doing so, but whenever he dated someone, Shou ended up sending out tons of dick pics anyway. He enjoyed imagining how excited it would get his girlfriends. In his imagination, it usually worked better than in reality. Most girls just told him to stop eventually.

Shou swiped through the photos he had taken. He was pretty pleased with at least three of them. His dick looked good on them. It wasn’t arousal he felt while looking at the pictures, but the pleasure of feeling sexy at least. If Shou received those pictures from another man, he’d be fapping to them for sure.

He put his mobile aside and looked back onto the computer screen, where the porn was still playing.

He tried to focus on the video, but he could only think of Yutaka. If he sent those pictures, maybe he would even get something in return.

Shou thought of pictures of Yutaka’s dick. He got excited by imagining the sight. But he also got excited by the thought, that Yutaka would trust him enough to share those photos with Shou. He got excited, imagining Yutaka wanting to be sexy for him. He imagined Yutaka saying his name.

Shou grabbed a tissue and ejaculated into it. He let out a low gasp and felt warm and peaceful now, although the orgasm hadn’t been exactly strong. Shou hadn’t really been in the mood. He had just been excited to take those pictures.

He switched off the porn and opened LINE on his computer.

It felt a little weird to reply to Yutaka right after having masturbated, but then, Yutaka would never know, so what did he care? And the sooner Shou answered to him, the sooner he could hope for a reply from Yutaka again.

I have prepared a bunch of tweets

for you! “I’m an idiot!”, “I’m a jerk!”,

“I’m a dumbass!” I really immerged

into your personality, so I’m pretty

sure, this will fool people into thinking

it’s actually you talking (^-^)

No, seriously, I understand why you

would feel insecure if what you have

to say is actually interesting. I feel

that way, too. I’m pretty sure that

everyone does. But don’t think of it

as telling the fans something about

yourself. It’s just about letting them

know you are healthy and alright.

Nobody cares what you had for lunch,

but a lot of people care to know that

you are okay. Even if you just tweet

“still healthy” and nothing else everyday

people will be happy. You are not boring

them, you are soothing them. So,

don’t think too much about what you

are tweeting. It doesn’t really matter :)

Also, I don’t think you are too cold at

all. Everyone who knows you can see

that you care. If your exes didn’t see

that, they weren’t paying attention to

you and therefore didn’t deserve you

anyway. You may be right about me

being more obsessively curious, but it’s

not like it’s a good quality. It’s exhausting

to feel like that. I wish I could care just a

little bit less at times.

And if people become bored with

Golden Bomber and demand something

new, we will just have to exchange the

members one by one. I’m sure that

will make things more interesting again :D

I obviously can’t leave the band, since

I basically AM the band, but with the

other members it shouldn’t be a

problem. You’re all useless anyway! We

will start the replacing with the member

around the longest, which would be …

oh, bad news for you, dude LOL

I’m sure we will find something to do

instead of the tour, though~

And I’m glad you slept well! Please,

watch my videos carefully (^-^)

Of course, I did the full ten hours,

though! I’m not a lazy asshole like

you!

I actually did watch AV today! Acky

got me fired up as always! Here, I’ll

attach some proof - to show I wasn’t

just gloomy all day ;D

Wwwww I love the bread! Bread is

the best! … though I wonder what

you are doing, checking foreign

children’s tv characters! You have

nothing better to do?! LOL

Shou went back to rereading his message. He always spent too much time editing them before sending. Deleting passages, which would mean he was oversharing. Adding passages, where something remained unclear. He always made sure Yutaka would understand what Shou was talking about, even without recalling the original question. Yutaka’s memory was pretty shitty after all.

Shou wondered if Yutaka spend that much time editing his messages as well. Probably not. It was Yutaka. He surely just sent the message as he had typed it down, without second guessing too much. He never filtered his words as much as Shou did. He never overthought his statements. And, most importantly, he did not care for Shou’s opinion as much as Shou cared for Yutaka’s opinion. Because from Yutaka’s point of view, Shou was probably just his friend since high school. Shou wasn’t someone he was romantically interested in. Of course, Yutaka cared less.

Shou stared at the paragraph about porn.

He had written it with the implication that he was going to attach a dick pic. Although he wasn’t sure he was going to. No, actually, that was bullshit. Shou had known he was going to attach a picture the moment he had taken them. He had even decided on which one to send already. Three of the photos had turned out nicely. But he couldn’t attach all three. That would look both vain and desperate. He had to settle for one. His favourite.

Shou hit send.

Then he opened LINE on his mobile and selected the picture of his dick. He clicked send once more.

Then he inhaled sharply.

He had probably made a mistake. But it was too late to take it back. The picture was out there. It was both a horrible feeling and a very liberating one.

He kept the chat open on his computer.

He took another long look at the dick pic. It was larger on the computer. It was a pretty good picture. His dick looked nice. He hoped Yutaka would think so, too.

Shou wondered, why he loved sharing nudes that much. He figured that he needed the appreciation. Of course, the fans told him he was cute and handsome all the time. But he wanted to be desired. Physically desired by a person, who actually knew him. Who knew what he looked like up close and without makeup. He wanted to feel sexy, just the way he was. He also wanted to be held sometimes and wanted someone to stroke his hair gently. He wanted to be attractive to someone, both physically and emotionally. But Shou wasn’t sure anyone would love him for his personality, not really at least. He was likeable. For the fans, he was adorable, too. But was he lovable? Shou wasn’t convinced of that. He’d be happy already, if someone just wanted to fuck him.

The status of the messages turned to read.

Shou felt sick again.

Yutaka had seen the message. He had seen the picture of Shou’s hard dick.

Would he react immediately? Would he tell Shou that he was gross and disgusting and should not harass him like that?

Or – and that was what he hoped for – would he react immediately with a more enthusiastic reply? Would he tell Shou how much the picture turned him on? Like, right now?

Shou waited.

He waited some more.

After ten minutes of just waiting he realized, that Yutaka would not react immediately. He would probably take several hours to reply, as usual. Those hours would be utter torture for Shou.

Couldn’t Yutaka imagine how nervous Shou was about his reaction? Or did he not consider that at all? Did he assume Shou had shared the picture as a joke, because he did not care about anyone seeing him naked? Knowing Shou’s attitude towards nudity, it wasn’t even an unlikely assumption. Shou couldn’t blame Yutaka, if that was, what he was thinking. Maybe he should be glad, if Yutaka didn’t read anything into the picture. Shou should probably be thankful that Yutaka was taking so long, it meant his feelings hadn’t been found out.

Of course, the original intention had been to find out, if maybe Yutaka returned his feelings in any way. But then, Shou wasn’t even sure if it was alright to speak of feelings on his side at all.

Sure, he was a little infatuated, but that happened fast - as soon as anyone showed interest in him, because he was just so starved for affection. It would probably blow over soon. At the latest, when he saw Yutaka’s stupid face again and remembered whom he was dealing with. His idiot high school friend, no one else. Shou wasn’t even sure he liked men that way. Yes, he had been recalling past incidents like the one with Yutaka now only recently. But if Yutaka didn’t count, those incidents didn’t count as well. Just because Shou thought of fucking the delivery man when he read out Shou’s name, didn’t mean he would actually do it. If he thought the same about a woman, though, he would certainly fuck her, if he got the chance.

Yutaka for example was so sure about being bisexual. Shou wasn’t sure. Which probably meant that he wasn’t bisexual. And if he wasn’t bisexual, it was impossible for him to be in love with Yutaka. And if he wasn’t in love with Yutaka, he had never been in love with another man, either, because his feelings had hardly ever been this strong before. If Shou had never been in love with another man, he therefore wasn’t bisexual. It was a flawless line of argument.

He figured that he needed to distract himself somehow, or his own mind would drive him crazy.

Shou did what he knew he wasn’t supposed to do.

He opened the latest ASMR video he had recorded to put his fans to sleep, switched off the sound and skipped right to the middle of it.

He stared at himself on the screen and tried to imagine he was seeing himself for the first time.

The first impression wasn’t that bad. Blonde hair, makeup. Alright.

He tried to imagine that Yutaka saw him like this. He wondered if Yutaka thought he was attractive.

His lips actually weren’t looking that bad.

But his teeth. Oh man, he really hated his teeth. And the shape of his face. Was his face really that round?

Shou told himself that he was just checking the video to make sure his fans were seeing him in a good light when watching the video.

But he could tell that the camera angle was awful.

Shou hated the shape of his face. And the eyeshadow was actually smudged on the left side. Why hadn’t he checked in the mirror, before recording the video? He looked fat, too.

Shou tried to imagine seeing himself as a stranger again.

Maybe it wasn’t so bad. At first glance, he didn’t notice the small details at all. To a stranger, he might be attractive even.

Shou skipped back a bit.

No, there was really no way to unsee it. He was fat.

The blonde hair, the makeup. It didn’t make him look good. It made him look like he was trying too hard. He looked like an ugly person, trying to look good, but unable to cover up his own ugliness.

Shou skipped forward in the video.

He was sitting so hunched over. His body was too small. It looked bad. He wouldn’t want to see a person like that naked.

Truthfully, he had recorded those videos for Yutaka to see him. For Yutaka to think he looked cute. Maybe even for Yutaka to tell him he looked cute. He wanted to make a good impression.

But he had failed.

Yutaka would see how small and chubby and ugly he was.

The whole thing was stupid, of course. Yutaka knew what he looked like. He had seen Shou many, many times before. He wouldn’t base his opinion on Shou’s looks on those videos.

But then, Yutaka wasn’t seeing him currently. All he saw of Shou were those videos and his face during the occasional video calls. He’d be influenced by what he saw for sure. And what he saw was ugly.

The video was over.

Shou jumped back to a random point of the video he hadn’t seen before.

His eyeshadow had been smudged from the very beginning. Without stylist, Shou was lost. There really was no way to make someone like him look good. The angle was not helping, either.

Shou thought of the fans as well. They would see his ugliness, too. And those were real strangers, people Shou had never met before. Maybe even people who weren’t fans would end up clicking on those videos. They would wonder why a person with Shou’s looks was even trying. He looked ridiculous with the makeup. Like he was too stupid to realize he was a lost cause.

Shou stared at the screen hypnotized.

During the last weeks, he had developed this habit, although he knew it was harmful. He couldn’t look away. He couldn’t stop listing his own physical flaws to himself. He shouldn’t be doing this. He shouldn’t be hurting himself like this. Shou felt so ugly, he wanted to claw off his own face.

It was strange, because over the years, he had pretty much stopped feeling self-conscious about his own appearance. This was what he looked like, so be it. There were a lot of fans, who called him handsome. In general, Shou did believe that people out there might find him attractive. Just when he watched those videos, he couldn’t believe it.

He checked the time.

It had gotten late already.

He should stop watching the video.

He opened another one, one of those he had already posted.

He looked bad in there, too. His face felt uncomfortable hot.

Yutaka had seen him like this. What had he thought to post something like this? Surely, Yutaka had wondered about it, too. Surely, he had thought that Shou looked ugly.

Shou wished no one would look at him ever again.

Everything about the way he moved was awful. No other human being he had ever seen moved like that. And what was with those facial expressions? That wasn’t normal. Surely, people wondered how he could still leave the house without feeling ashamed of being seen.

Shou switched off the computer.

He shouldn’t be doing this to himself.

It was late and he should go to sleep. Lately, he had taken to getting up early. It was helping him stay positive. He should be going to sleep early, too.

Shou got ready for bed and lay down. He switched off the lights and stared into the dark.

He was alright. He had no reason to hate himself.

He imagined Yutaka holding him in his arms.

Shou knew that he shouldn’t be imagining such things, either. It was making his infatuation worse. He was adding more details to the Yutaka he had constructed in his mind. He was making it harder for himself to fall out of love with that construct.

But all the same, he couldn’t bear lying in bed alone.

The mobile on his bedside table buzzed.

Shou’s whole body went tense, but he relaxed again immediately.

Yutaka never messaged him that late at night. Yutaka had gotten his sleeping schedule under control recently. He was probably asleep already. It was most likely just Kenji replying to his last messages.

Not really interested Shou took up his mobile in the dark and checked.

He had one new message from Yutaka.

Shou inhaled shakily, before opening it. This time, Shou wasn’t even trying to put it off. He wasn’t trying to lie to himself. He couldn’t wait to read Yutaka’s message.

He thought of the dick pic he had sent and felt awful.

Now, he would find out.

Thank you, that was actually

pretty good advice! I understand

that the fans want to know if I’m

alright. I want to know the people

I care for are healthy, too. I will try

to view it that way and think less

about the contents of what I’m

posting. I want the fans to be happy

and not to worry about me after all.

And I think it’s nice that you care

so much. I’ve always liked that

about you. You’ve always been very

considerate of others. It shows in

your songs, too. The fans can feel

that you are interested in them,

and that it’s genuine and not just

one-sided on their behalf. That’s

why they love you.

Please, don’t fire me! I’ll get a new

haircut or something! LOL

Oooh, that’s hot! I’m glad you didn’t

loose your libido yet, otherwise I’d

start to worry ^-^

I swear, it was just an accident that I

was looking up those things! I was

doing, uhm, research? LOL

Shou read the message three times. Luckily, it was pretty short.

“that’s hot!”? What was that supposed to mean? Did Yutaka think Shou’s dick was hot? Like, in a sexually appealing way?

But if Yutaka thought so, why hadn’t he said so more explicitly? Was he just saying that, so he wouldn’t appear rude? It did sound like the bare minimum reply, that wasn’t totally turning Shou down, but not expressing interest either. It was the polite way of saying that he didn’t care to see Shou’s hard dick ever again, wasn’t it?

Or did the exclamation mark mean, that he actually really meant it? That he wasn’t just finding Shou’s dick hot, but very hot indeed. Was he too scared that Shou might have made a joke only to react more strongly? Was it a hesitant, polite way of letting Shou know that he was intrigued by his dick, but did not want to push the situation, in case it made Shou uncomfortable?

Shou wished Yutaka’s reaction had been stronger. He would have loved to read something like “your dick is sexy, I want to suck it” or “damn, you made me all hard as well”. In that case, he would know what he was dealing with.

But Yutaka’s reaction could basically mean anything.

Maybe it was Shou’s own fault. He had put his message like it was meant to be a joke. He had made sure that the backdoor was still open for escape. He had even mentioned Acky. A woman. Of course, he still liked Acky. He still liked her a lot. But rubbing that in could have been the wrong approach to get Yutaka’s attention.

If Shou had written something explicit like “I don’t need to watch porn, I just think of you” instead, it might have gone differently. If he had been brave enough to be that direct, maybe Yutaka would have been brave enough to be direct as well. Shou couldn’t really blame him for staying tentative, when he himself had been cowardly, too.

Maybe Yutaka had not understood what Shou was asking him with that picture, because Shou had once again chosen words that did not say what he really meant. Maybe, Yutaka hadn’t heard the words implied, because Shou hadn’t actually voiced them. Maybe he was as much at a loss about how Shou felt as Shou was at a loss about Yutaka’s feelings.

If he really wanted to know, Shou ought to ask.

He switched off his phone and put it aside.

Well, those were clearly problems for tomorrow. He preferred typing the longer messages on his computer and he had already switched it off. And it was late anyway. He was supposed to sleep. And even if he sent a reply now, Yutaka would probably only see it tomorrow, so why bother?

Shou tossed in his bed.

He should sleep. Why was it so hard to fall asleep?

He thought of all the things he wanted to tell Yutaka. I think I like you. I want you to hold me. You make me feel confused about my sexuality. What makes you so sure you are bisexual? Do you like me back? Why have you made fun of me in front of the girl I liked? I’m sorry I hurt you.

Shou picked up his phone again, turning it in his hands without switching it on.

Maybe he should just tell him.

Instead of just recording different words for Yutaka, that ended up as nothing but meaningless vibrations in the air, he should write down what he really wanted to say. He’d have it black on white. A remaining proof. Not just vibrations that would vanish the moment he spoke them. He needed Yutaka to know. It had been weeks now and still he hadn’t made sure that Yutaka knew.

Shou wondered if it was alright to text Yutaka now. He had only just texted Shou. There was a fair chance he was still awake. He wouldn’t be mad, if Shou didn’t reply to the rest of his message, would he? Or should Shou type out a full reply? The message wasn’t that long this time. But then, it would take too much time and Yutaka might fall asleep in the meantime.

Shou unlocked his phone and opened the app.

He stared at their chat for a moment.

Then he started typing.

I’m sorry, this is not the reply yet.

I’ll reply properly tomorrow. But I

can’t sleep. I keep thinking of what

I said the last time we saw each

other. Talking hasn’t been weird

since, so I guess you are not mad.

But I still feel sorry. I should have

told you sooner. I’m sorry.

He hit send, before he could change his mind. The message turned to read almost immediately. So, Yutaka was still awake.

Shou kept the chat open, wondering if Yutaka would reply right away. He hoped he would tell Shou that it was alright and that he forgave him for all the ugly things he had said.

The screen of Shou’s mobile changed. It started buzzing.

For a moment, Shou felt nothing but panic.

Yutaka was calling him. Shou hadn’t talked to him on the phone one on one since their last meeting.

Shou pushed the red sign to reject the phone call.

Then he inhaled deeply.

He wondered what Yutaka would think of him now.

His mobile started buzzing again.

Shou hit the red button again, faster this time.

He typed.

I’m sorry, I can’t talk about it in person.

Shou wondered why the thought scared him so much. He actually didn’t mind talking about his feelings openly. He put them into songs and when asked questions during interviews, he was never scared to answer honestly, no matter how personal the topic was. He didn’t mind sharing personal information with his fans.

But he had never been good at talking honestly, when it was just him and someone he cared for. All of his past relationships had ended because of that. He had hurt all of his ex-girlfriends and he had never been able to apologize.

Shou, please, we need to talk about

this. I can do the talking, if you want.

But I need to tell you something. I

don’t want to do this over the chat.

Please. I promise, I won’t make it

difficult for you. Just pick up the phone.

Shou read the message that had just come in. He hesitated. He considered, if he should call Yutaka.

Shou’s behaviour was ridiculous and not reasonable at all. He had been on the phone with Yutaka so many times before. Rejecting his call was just a panic reaction.

And after all, Shou was the one who had brought it up. Yutaka deserved a proper conversation, if he wanted to talk about it. Shou trusted him to keep his promise, too. Yutaka did not mean to make this difficult for Shou. He probably needed this call.

Shou’s mobile started buzzing again.

Shou inhaled, letting it ring for quite a while. Yutaka did not hang up. Finally, Shou picked up.

“Hello?”, he said quietly.

“Hey, Shou”, Yutaka said.

Shou had believed that hearing his voice would be weird. That it would remind him of the real Yutaka, who had not much in common with his imaginary construct. Shou had thought he would remember that he wasn’t really in love with Yutaka as soon as he heard his voice.

But instead, a huge wave of affection rushed over him the moment he heard Yutaka speak.

He had forgotten how much he cared for Yutaka. Sure, his construct was just a construct. But that was the point. No construct could live up to all the years of friendship they shared. Truth was, Shou did not care less for the real Yutaka than he cared for his romanticized idolization. He cared so, so much more.

“Hey”, Shou repeated softly.

“Are you in bed already?”, Yutaka asked.

Shou was irritated by this start of the conversation. He had imagined Yutaka would cut right to the point. Somehow, it made Shou feel disappointed. As if he had built up all this anticipation for nothing.

“Yeah, I went to bed half an hour ago or so”, he confirmed. “It’s late already. But I can’t fall asleep.”

“Yes, me neither”, Yutaka confirmed. “I was sleeping early those last nights, but tonight I couldn’t.”

Shou wanted to ask, if Yutaka had watched one of his videos tonight. In a chat, Shou would have written down the question for sure. In real a conversation, he couldn’t get out the words. They sounded too vain, like he really thought his videos alone might fix Yutaka’s sleeping problems. Maybe Yutaka did not even care for Shou’s videos at all. In writing, you couldn’t tell. But his voice might give him away, if he was just being polite about enjoying them. Shou thought, that he wouldn’t be able to deal with the disappointment well, if that was the case. He figured it would be safer to stay quiet.

Yutaka stayed silent, too.

Shou felt like Yutaka was waiting for him to bring up the topic, because he knew that Shou was the one uncomfortable talking about it. He obviously wanted to go with Shou’s pace.

Shou’s pace would be not addressing it at all.

“About the last time we met”, Yutaka finally said.

“I’m sorry”, Shou interrupted him.

Yutaka went quiet, as if he wanted to give Shou the time to voice his thoughts properly. Shou kept shut.

“I’m not mad”, Yutaka said. “You didn’t need to apologize.”

If Yutaka wasn’t mad, Shou wondered why he had wanted to talk about it on the phone.

“I’m sorry anyway”, Shou said. “I didn’t mean the things I said. Some of them were pretty cruel.”

“I deserved them”, Yutaka said. “I was acting like a jerk.”

Shou looked up at the ceiling. In the dark, he could only make out shadows.

He thought about how their voices where just impulses, rushing through the line to get to the other side. Just vibrations, in the end, just vibrations again instead of a real connection.

“You were”, Shou confirmed. “I still don’t understand why you had to embarrass me like that in front of the girl.”

Both of them went silent once more.

Shou thought, that silence could hold meaning, too.

“You like her?”, Shou asked eventually.

Yutaka chuckled.

“Oh, dear, no”, he said and then sighed. “This is what I wanted to talk to you about. We’ve been talking very honestly to each other those last weeks. But there is something I didn’t tell you. A big thing. And I feel like a fraud, telling you everything, but not this. Because it’s so essential for me. It’s been on my mind so much for such a long time already. But I didn’t want to send you a text about it. I wanted to tell you personally.”

“Why don’t you tell me after the lockdown?”, Shou suggested, suddenly scared of what Yutaka might have to say. “Once we can meet again in person.”

He didn’t want to hear about his secret. Not, when his secret might possibly hurt Shou. Maybe there was someone in Yutaka’s life, someone special.

“No, I think over the phone is best. I probably wouldn’t gather the courage, if I had to tell you face to face.”

Shou closed his eyes and listened to Yutaka’s breath. His breath was causing vibrations in the air, too.

Shou understood what Yutaka meant and at the same time, he didn’t. He had thought he wouldn’t be able to talk about his feelings over the phone, because he wouldn’t feel as safe as he did while writing a letter. But at the same time, he thought that he never felt as safe as he did while listening to Yutaka’s voice.

Maybe it was because Yutaka had always been so close to him. He had seen him every other day for years. It had felt normal to have him by his side.

But now, that the lockdown separated them, Shou realized that it wasn’t the fans he missed most, or Jun or Kenji. It was Yutaka. Maybe the messages they exchanged weren’t the reason he liked Yutaka. Maybe the exchange of those messages had been the natural course, because he missed Yutaka so much. Maybe they were just exchanging those messages, because Shou had liked Yutaka all along.

“So?”, Shou asked, bracing himself.

“I was jealous, when I saw how she smiled at you”, Yutaka confessed. “And I already knew you liked her. I thought you guys might actually end up dating. I was scared, so I wanted to destroy that possibility. I didn’t consider how that would make you feel, though. I want you to be happy. Even if it’s with that girl. I’m sorry, too.”

Shou licked his lips. They felt dry.

“So, you do like her?”, he assured.

“No”, Yutaka said very seriously. “I like you, Shou. That’s why I was jealous. And that’s why I was scared to tell you in person. I don’t want to ruin everything. You are important to me as a friend. Not just because of the band. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable. But now that we talked about our feelings so much and about romance too, not telling you felt like lying to you. I had to say it out loud at least once.”

Shou hummed quietly, not sure what he ought to reply.

He had had the feeling that maybe his feelings weren’t entirely one-sided. Not because Yutaka had flirted with him. But because their conversations seemed to mean as much to him as they did to Shou.

Shou had thought that it was a recent development, though. That Yutaka got confused through their conversations, too, and that Shou might have a chance with him, if he only dared to try for him. He had thought, he’d have to put in more work to actually get Yutaka interested.

He hadn’t assumed that Yutaka had already liked him to begin with. It made sense, but it also seemed surreal. Shou had hoped for this and he could even understand what Yutaka saw in him. They had good chemistry. Their chemistry had always been good. And Yutaka was bisexual. It wasn’t unreasonable. But then, it seemed too good to be true.

“Are you sure?”, Shou asked.

Yutaka snorted quietly.

“Yes, I am, idiot”, he clarified, then he paused. “Please, don’t be angry. It won’t change anything between us, I promise.”

“I’m not angry”, Shou said, fumbling with the hem of his blanket. He knew that he was supposed to say something encouraging, something to let on that he actually felt the same. But he seemed unable to find the right words.

“Actually”, he said. “I’m happy. I was worried that it was her you liked. I mean, really worried. I think that’s why I lashed out at you so bad. It wasn’t about her.”

Shou went quiet as if to listen to the echo of the words he had sent out through the phone line. They were just meaningless vibrations again. Yutaka could not possibly guess all the words Shou was trying to transmit through that statement. He couldn’t hear all the silent words Shou spoke, which didn’t even cause vibrations in the air.

I’m confused about all this.

I’m sorry I hurt you.

I’m in love with you.

For another moment, Shou just listened to Yutaka’s breath through the phone. How was it possible that Yutaka’s breath caused vibrations, but Shou’s thoughts didn’t, although they sounded so loud inside his own head?

But right then, as if through a miracle, Yutaka whispered the words that Shou had not dared to hope for. It was just three words, but Shou heard all the other words beneath them, too, all the ones that didn’t even cause a vibration.

“I hear you”, Yutaka said.

#Golden Bomber #Kiryuuin Shou #Kyan Yutaka #kirikyan #fanfiction #fanfic #I hope you don't feel like I'm spamming you

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nicole-lynne · 5 years

Text

The Bus Ride

Pairing: 18+ Peter Parker x Reader (Peter IS over 18 in this fic, it takes place after graduation!)

Warnings: NSFW 18+, public sex

Your heart was pounding in your chest, your throat dry at the idea that was forming your mind. You were on the second attempt of the school trip, more of a graduation trip, after the last one had been such a disaster. Peter Parker, your boyfriend of a year, had been in massive distress the first time around but you were determined to have a great time.

It had been three weeks since you’d been alone with Peter and you were getting needier and needier by the moment.

This morning, as you’d watched Peter and Ned wrestle in the hallway of your Parisian hotel, you could feel your mouth salivate with want with every tense of his muscles. That was the moment, a thought planted in your head. A devilish grin spread across your face but you shook it off quickly before MJ or Betty could notice.

All day, Peter had been driving your hormones crazy all while being completely clueless to it. He had made small touches with his soft fingertips throughout the day, left feather kisses on your shoulder when he had grabbed your bag, and now he was wearing thin grey sweatpants that hugged his butt perfectly. But overall, it had still been a perfectly romantic day traipsing throughout Paris with your handsome boyfriend before 7pm came and you had to head to the next town.

As you gazed out at the bus from a crack in the bathroom window, you reached down and slipped your lacy panties off from underneath your cotton skirt. Hastily, you tucked them into the band of your skirt and raced outside to join your friends.

“I’m here! Don’t worry!” You called when you noticed Peter looking around for you.

Relief flooded his face, “I thought I’d lost you, Y/N.”

You gave him a small smile and slipped your hand into his grip. You opened your mouth to reply when Mr. Harrington burst into your group.

“Alright, kiddos, I know it’s late. None of us want to be getting on a bus. But hopefully we can to the next hotel by around 3am.”

The entire crowd groaned at that, while your heart fluttered with excitement. Peter gave you a puzzled glance as you buzzed at his side. You flashed him a smile with hopes to reassure him.

As the group began herding to the bus, you tugged Peter’s hand, pulling him back to where you stood.

“You okay, pretty girl?” His brow furrowed with concern.

You moved in closer to Peter. His face was inches from yours, his big brown eyes searched yours anxiously. You looked up at him through your eyelashes, taking in his sharp jawline and pouty lips.

Swiftly, you pulled your panties out and slipped them into his pocket. A deep crimson blush crept up his neck at the sight of the black lace sticking out.

“I-is that, um, yo-your...?”

You giggled at his stammering before reaching up on tiptoes to peck his lips. With a turn, you dashed to the bus, leaving him gaping at the thought of your underwear in his pants pocket and nothing under your skirt.

“Peter, come on, bud! We’re waiting on you!” Mr. Harrington hollered, pushing Peter into action.

He jumped onto the bus, his eyes searching each row for you over the tall seats. At the last row, he found you with a tiny smirk on your face. He narrowed his eyes at you before slipping past you to sit in the window seat.

Ned leaned over Betty from across the row. “Peter! We can stay up all night, this will be so much fun.”

~~~

Two hours later, Ned was passed out, his face squished against the window. The darkness had crept into the bus and set a comfortable silence over the group. You and Peter both had your noses in books, your hands intertwined at your sides.

An alarm vibrated in your pocket and your skin prickled with heat.

Sneakily, you pulled your phone out and clicked send on the sexy picture you had queued up. You tucked it back away and waited patiently, returning to your book. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Peter pull out his phone and immediately drop it into his lap. He shot you a bewildered look before picking his phone back up and ogling it.

“Hey, Y/N?”

“Hmm?” You buzzed, your eyes still on the page but not reading the words.

“Di-did you mean to send this picture to me?” Peter’s voice was quiet and rushed.

Your eyes flickered over for a moment, “yes, of course.” Peter’s mouth gaped open and closed like a fish.

“You’re gonna catch flies, babe.” You teased. Peter snapped his jaw shut and reached to adjust his pants. You grinned to yourself before settling in to the seat. It was clear that Peter had been missing your body as much as you’d been missing his.

~~~

Another hour had passed before an alarm went off in your pocket. Another wicked grin graced your lips.

You glanced around and took note of all the sleeping forms around you. The sound of Mr. Dell’s NPR podcast was faint at the front of the bus under his loud snores. You tilted your body towards Peter and nudged his ribs.

“Hey, Pete?”

Peter’s body tensed next to you but leaned in closer. “Yeah, sweetheart?”

“I’m so wet right now.” Your voice was barely audible but his head snapped in your direction, your eyes glimmering diabolically.

“What do you want me to do, baby?” He glanced around nervously. His heart was racing at the thought of what your next words would be.

You leaned in closer, “do you remember last month when we talked about having sex in public?” Your lips brushed against his ear, your voice husky.

Peter’s dick twitched excitedly, but his stomach flipped at the memory.

“I want to do it. Now.”

You giggled as Peter’s eyes widened in disbelief. “He-here? Y/N, you can’t be serious.”

In response, you reached for Peter’s hand and slipped it under your skirt. His fingers ran across your inner thigh and up to your wetness. His eyes fluttered shut as his head fell back against the seat.

“Pete, I want to feel you in me.” Your hand palmed his dick through his sweatpants and his mouth formed an O with pleasure. “It’ll be our little secret.”

Peter opened his eyes and stared intently at your face. Every nerve in his body was humming with desire. He was dying to pull you against him and connect his lips to yours. You looked so beautiful with your hair ruffled messily, your lips parted with want. He knew in that moment that he could never say no to you. Slowly, he nodded his head in agreement.

Your face broke out in a smile before slamming your lips to his greedily. His hands tangled into your hair and pulled your chest to his. His fingers reappeared from under your skirt and he broke free to insert them into your mouth. Your core throbbed and you could feel your wetness as you rubbed your thighs together. Peter’s tongue swept into your mouth again, enjoying the taste of yourself on your lips.

You broke apart and checked one last time that everyone was asleep. But the idea of being so close to being caught turned you on even more.

You lifted up and hooked your leg over Peter’s lap, your heated core pressed against his dick. Fidgeting a little, you moved to wrap your blanket around the both of you, covering your bodies. The smell of his shampoo wafted up your nose and you inhaled deep, a small smile growing.

He cupped your face gently and pressed a soft kiss to your lips. “Are you absolutely positive about this, sweetheart? We could get in so much trouble if we got caught.”

You gave a faint nod and ground against him. In response, he bucked his hips into your crotch and you dropped your mouth into the crook of his neck to suppress a groan. Peter’s breath was hot on your shoulder, his hands roamed along your back, pulling you against his muscled chest.

With a trembling breath, you kissed a trail up his neck and nipped his earlobe between your teeth.

“Pete, I need to feel your cock in me now.” Beneath you, Peter shivered.

His hands snaked around to the front of your body and glided down to the top of his sweatpants. You propped up on your knees, allowing him the room to slip his pants down.

The moment the fabric moved off the tip, his cock sprang up and smack against your thigh. Your pussy clenched with anticipation. Peter gripped his dick, teasing your folds with the tip, covering it with your wetness.

Peter’s other hand reached up to hold the back of your head and your eyes met his passionately. His lips were grazing against yours. “You’re gonna have to be very quiet, pretty girl.” Then his mouth captured yours hungrily and you body went weak at how amazing it felt.

With one swift tug, Peter moved your body to sink onto his cock to the hilt. You whimpered into his mouth and he swallowed it happily.

“Shit baby, you’re so damn tight for me.” His voice husky with lust. The tone making you feel even weaker.

The stretch felt so glorious and you could feel him throbbing against your walls. To build the intensity, you moved up and down on him tortuously slow. His fingers were digging into your hips with every thrust and your stomach fluttered knowing there would be bruises there later.

Your head was buried in Peter’s neck, forcing every little noise into his skin. Each time you sunk onto him, your clit rubbed against his pelvic bone, sparking a fire in your core. You huffed slightly as your release moved closer and closer.

Suddenly, Peter’s arms tightened against your body like a vice grip, stilling your movements.

“Don’t move a muscle and don’t speak.” Peter uttered into your ear. Your heart was slamming against your chest, fear creeping throughout your limbs. Your ears perked up at the sound of footsteps up the aisle.

“Is everything alright, Peter?” You heard Mr. Harrington whisper above you both. You squeezed your eyes shut, your face nuzzled against Peter, thanking the lord that your blanket was covering you both, hiding the fact that he was balls deep in your pussy.

Peter nodded crisply, “yeah, she just had a nightmare and holding her helps her calm down. She passed out about 30 minutes ago.”

Mr. Harrington was silent for a moment and you were positive this was the moment you’d be caught.

“It’s not really safe for her to be out of her seat, Peter. What if there were an accident.”

“I’ll keep her safe, sir. I would never let anything hurt her.” Your heart clenched at the sentiment and you had to force down the urge to plant a kiss on this man’s beautiful face.

You heard Mr. Harrington sigh, “okay, Peter, but not too much longer, okay?”

“Sure thing, sir.” Peter chirped and you were proud that his voice had stayed so strong. The footsteps faded back down the row and you let your body relax somewhat. But Peter’s hands stayed tight at your thighs.

“You can’t move, baby.”

You mouth dropped slightly in shock. “Excuse me?”

“Mr. Harrington is going to take a bit to fall back asleep. So you’re going to have to sit still for a little bit.”

“Pete,” your voice was thin and whiny, “please, I’m so close...”

Peter’s head turned slowly and he placed a tender kiss on your cheek before whispering, “I said to sit still. Now be a good little girl and do what I say.”

Your face lit up with surprise at Peter’s strict tone. He could definitely be dominant when he wanted, but he had never done something like this before. His dick was barely brushing your most sensitive spot and you were dying to move up and down again.

Curious, you tried to wiggle a little but Peter’s grip on your legs kept you firmly in place. You looked up at the side of his face and whimpered, a smirk growing on his lips. He knew exactly what he was doing to you.

The longer you stayed still, the feeling of being stuffed was pushing you closer and closer to the edge, but never letting you get there. You could feel his dick twitching as the minutes passed by and with each movement, you were getting wetter and wetter, your core begging for the needed friction.

Every breath that he took would cause your clit to rub against him tenderly. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head, the need to cum driving you to insanity.

Finally, after 30 minutes of torture, your desire had reached a new high. You were salivating for movement.

“Peter...” you mewled into his neck, your panting heavy against his soft skin.

Beneath you, Peter shivered, sending a jolt of pleasure through your body. Softly, you scraped your teeth against the sensitive spot below his earlobe, hoping to pull another reaction from him. Goosebumps covered his skin and he rested his head against yours, a quiet moan escaping him. It was evident that his guard was down now.

Testing your limits, your rocked your hips slightly pushing his dick into you deeper. Peter dropped his head onto the back of the seat in satisfaction.

“You feel so good in me, baby.” You breathed barely above a whisper.

At the praising words, Peter’s hands cupped your ass and pulled you close as he thrust up, his cock hitting your g-spot perfectly. Your hand flew to your mouth to suppress a moan.

Slowly, he dragged his dick against your walls and pulled out of you, only to pull your hips back down to meet his again. He was holding you up just perfectly that he was moving in and out of you seamlessly.

You gripped onto him, burying your head into his neck, and let him move you back and forth against him. Every thrust, his head was hitting the perfect spot and you could feel the coil in your belly tightening.

“You gonna be a good girl and cum for me?” Peter’s lips brushed your ear, the tip of his tongue running along the edge of the lobe.

The moment he said that, his tip hit your g-spot one last time and pushed you over the edge. Your orgasm slammed into your body, bliss filling every inch of your body. You bit down on your lip hard to stop a moan that was threatening to spill out as you convulsed in his arms roughly. Peter continued to drive into you working you through the pleasure.

Your pussy clenched around his dick tightly and you felt the stutter in Peter’s hips as he came in you, thick spurts of cum drenching your walls. He wrapped his arms around you tighter, holding you against his chest. You could feel his muscles constricting against you as he tried to stifle his heavy panting in your hair.

Quickly, you glanced around to make sure everyone around you was still asleep. Everyone seemed to be passed out in their own worlds so you had managed to get through this safely.

As you both started to come down from your highs, Peter’s hands rubbed up and down on your back, caressing every inch sweetly. Exhaustion took over your limbs and you fell limp onto him, the desire to sleep coming quicker.

Peter patted your thigh gently, “come on sweetheart, you can’t fall asleep yet.”

With ease, he lifted you up causing you whimpering slightly as he pulled out of you. A feeling of being empty making you frown. He shifted you slightly into your own seat and smoothed out your skirt.

“That was amazing, baby.” He reached forward and tucked a piece of hair behind your ear.

Your head lulled onto his shoulder. You eyes drooping, heavy with sleep. “I love you so much, Peter Parker.”

Peter bent down and placed a kiss on the top of your head. “I love you too, (Y/N).”

#peter parker #peter x reader #peter parker boyfriend #peter parker reader insert #tom holland #spider-man #Spider Man: Homecoming #SPIDER MAN: FAR FROM HOME #ffh #sp ffh #lemon #the bus ride #nicole-lynnefics

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