#not things that scare me but general negative energy .

[fated-normal-767]

See it’s hard trying to send you bad vibes because most of my horror comes at being hunted or having someone replace me / wear my skin or have like a malicious doppelgänger of me running around but I feel like those are all things you would enjoy somehow .

buddy sounds like you just named my favourite hobbies

[kg2hub]

kindergala? more like: lou singlehandedly revives the kindergarten tumblr rp community part 2 electric boogaloo /lh /silly

[roaringheat]

ANOTHER THING is I am absolutely obsessed with the way the gang's relationships with each other evolve so naturally throughout the game whether for better or for worse. I've only just started chapter 4 but seeing them grow and have problems or resolve them over a long period of time is so impressive... literally no other game compares to that level of effort and writing

[tiredfox64]

Hi!!!! I loved your bi-han x chubby reader stories and wanted to make a request please!

I was hoping to request a Smoke x chubby reader where the reader is a baker of Madam Bo's and is the sweetheart of the village and Insecure about her body. The rest would be up to you. Please and thank you!

Sweet Honeybuns

Prior notes: Mhm mhm I like this. Good energy. Love when I get to project myself. I love that man I just know he would love to cuddle a woman like me

Pairing: Tomas x Chubby Baker! Afab reader

Warnings ‼️: I'm sorry if you start craving my b

Oh, that face. That beautiful face of yours. Those gorgeous eyes that he could get lost in. Those adorable cheeks that he would love to caress and kiss. That lovely, plump body of yours. The way your hips move hypnotizes him. You move throughout the bakery part of the tea house swiftly, trying to put more cakes in the display window. Your hair was put up nicely to prevent it from blocking your view and getting in your face. Your pretty, well-kept fingers were wrapped around the whisk as you began to beat the egg whites before adding the other ingredients in to make the perfect meringue. Tomas already knew you were making your meringue cookies since you make them every Wednesday. He loves your meringue cookies, they’re as sweet as you. He loves everything you make. Oh heavens, he loves you.

“Tomas!” Kuai Liang yelled right into Tomas’ ear.

“Huh?!”

Tomas was spooked at first before he started to blush hard. He was caught in the act again. He was caught staring at you with that lovesick expression. Elbow resting on the table, chin resting on his hand, the generic lovesick boy pose. We can’t forget about that dopey smile. It’s a shock that he wasn’t swinging his feet. Kuai Liang knew what was going on. Everybody in the Shirai Ryu knew. If they go to the tea house at least once with Tomas they get to see him go into that daze again. Every single time it’s like clockwork.

“You should ask her out soon. It won’t do you good if you continue to keep your feelings in.” Kuai Liang suggested.

Tomas immediately nodded his head no. He really, really, REALLY likes you. But he’s afraid that you will reject him. It’s a normal fear. He thinks you are out of his league. You’re just too sweet. You probably already have a line of men ready to be your boyfriend. You’ve already captured the hearts of many with your baking. With the addition of your kind personality, you’re basically as sweet as the cannoli you make.  You’re a sweetheart in everyone’s eyes. To the men and women, young and old. Everybody must want a chance with you. They must all be as desperate as Tomas is.

Though there were few who were interested in you, you had your heart set on one man. Your heart was set on Tomas. He was so kind to you and he brought you so much joy to your week. He took the time to talk to you. It didn’t matter what there was always something to talk about. It would go on for so long that Madame Bo would have to yell at you to get back to work and she would scold Tomas for distracting you. Though she found it cute how you two were so lost in conversation. She encouraged you to establish a relationship with him but you always said you can’t, you just can’t.

Truth be told you so badly wanted to ask Tomas out but you were afraid of many things. You were afraid of rejection, fair enough. You were afraid of making things awkward between you two and that you would see him less after that, that’s also fair. Lastly, you were afraid that he wouldn’t like you because you are…chubby.

Now hold on just a sec, that’s not fair to you.

Yes, you were worried he wouldn’t like a girl like you cause of your body type. You looked at yourself negatively. You treated your stretchmarks as if they were a curse. You believe cellulite is unnatural. You think you need a thigh gap to get his attention. You feel like your belly will scare him away.

Oh poppycock! Excuse my language. But what you think, and I’m saying this because I care about you, is bullshit. Imma prove your sweet ass wrong.

You saw Tomas coming your way. He gave you a quick wave and you gave him a smile. Gosh, his heart might explode after seeing that.

“There’s my favorite man. What can I get you for today?”

Yup, his heart just exploded. He loves that you call him your favorite man. He’s not just another customer to you and that makes him feel special.

“Can’t I come up to talk to my favorite lady without having to buy anything?” He teased. Now your heart was exploding. He is smooth when he isn’t trying.

“I would allow you to do that but you know how Madame Bo gets when I stop working.”

“Fine, I’ll bite. Do you have anything special this week that you can offer to your favorite man?”

“Well we have coconut cream pie, flan, conchas, baklava, peach cobbler, liu shao bao, bublania, tiramisú,” on and on you went.

That’s something else he likes about you. You have desserts from all around the world. But damn does it make it hard to decide what to buy from you. He lowered his head as he struggled to pick something from you. Pick for him, the man is struggling.

“How about I get you some flan? I think you will like it.” You walked over to the display window, pulled out the flan you recently made and cut him a big slice.

You brought him the plate with that delicious, syrupy goodness on it. You scooped him a piece of it and tried to feed it to Tomas. You looked so adorable to him at that moment. Looking up at him with doe eyes while waiting for him to open his mouth. He opened up and ate the bit of flan that was on the spoon. The creamy custard was practically melting in his mouth with the caramel top hitting his tongue soon after. He just found his new favorite dessert.

“I love you.”

“Huh?”

“I mean I love it!”

Tomas stumbled over his words. He meant the first thing he said but also didn’t mean to say it in that moment. The goodness of the flan messed with his mind and made his heart swell with love for you. You know what they say: the fastest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. You already captured his heart a long time ago but this instance made his heart become caged by you. You will never release it even though you never knew you had it before.

He asked you how much it was but you told him it’s on the house since he was so handsome. You sly dog, flirting with him effortlessly while he was already spiraling. You left him blushing while walking back to his table. The moment he sat and placed his plate down he rested his head on the table. It’s over for him. He’s so madly in love with you. You got him so bad he forgot to make an effort to ask you out while he was up there. Kuai Liang started patting his back. Brother needs to support his brother.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

It was near closing time. Most customers have left and almost all the waitresses were gone. Finally, some peace. You decided you deserve a treat after baking all day and serving customers. Time to munch on the mistake pile. The pile of slightly burnt cookies, lopsided muffins, and double-glazed bear claws.

You only really eat when most people are gone. If you give yourself a treat, even just a bite of a banana muffin, others think it’s typical of you. It’s tiring to hear people compliment your desserts only to immediately say you should slow down on eating them yourselves. You barely ever eat your own work since you have to save it for the customers. You know it’s unhealthy to make it a habit of eating your mistakes which is why you balance it out with healthy and balanced meals. You eat well actually. Yet some people think you intentionally make mistakes just so you can eat. How could people be so ignorant and rude when all you ever do is give. You give and give and they appreciate it but they still have something to say.

Whatever, you’re alone. You started nibbling on some cookies, enjoying yourself for a bit before turning around and seeing Tomas was near the counter. You immediately hid the cookie behind your back like a guilty child.

“Oh, I thought you would have gone home already.” You said.

“I would have but Kuai Liang said I had to do something or else he wouldn’t let me leave.” Tomas chuckled awkwardly as if it were a joke but it was serious. Kuai Liang would not let Tomas come home until he confessed to you.

“I hope I didn’t disturb you. You can keep eating your cookie if you want.”

You were hesitant to do so. You just nodded your head while putting the cookie away. Tomas got worried that he had upset you. He didn’t mean to be rude even though he did no wrong. He leaped over the counter to get closer to you and apologize.

“I’m sorry if I upset you—”

“No, no, it’s alright. I just…don’t like eating in front of people.” Your voice got quiet near the end.

“Oh, I’m guessing you get anxious?” He asked.

“No, I just…don’t like when people comment on my weight when I eat. I don’t want you thinking I'm a slob or something.”

That hurt Tomas to hear. He didn’t know people were making backhanded comments towards you. Now that he thinks about it even when he has stayed at the tea house for a long while he never saw you eat in front of anyone. He was hoping that you weren’t starving yourself throughout the day just to prevent people from making comments about your weight.

“I hope you don’t think you are one because you’re not. I could never think of you like that. How could I think something so negatively to a girl that I want as,” He paused for a second before finally having the balls to say it, “my girlfriend.”

You looked at him in shock. His girlfriend? You? Did you accidentally take a bite out of your “special” cookie because you can’t believe what you just heard.

“Me? Why me?” You asked.

“Why you? Why not you? You’re incredibly sweet and hardworking. I’ve never seen so many loving eyes on one girl before. Everything you say to me makes me want you even more. I was afraid a lot of people had their eyes on you and I was afraid I would lose you to someone else. That’s why Kuai Liang told me to confess now. I just really want you in my life. You’re the only girl who has made my heart feel like this—this tingly feeling that reappears every time I see you.”

His words were so genuine you found it difficult to disagree or fight back on anything. His eyes were practically twinkling as he looked at you, waiting for a response. He was nervous that you would actually reject him. He was picking at his nails and he was biting his lip slightly.

“You mean, you still want to date me even though I’m,” you pointed to your chubby belly.

“So?”

Yeah, so what?

Don’t break his heart. If you do, you end up breaking your heart as well. It’s as clear as the night sky that Tomas really wanted you to be his girlfriend. It didn’t matter your size. He wants to love you and cherish you. He wants to kiss and caress you all night long. Do us all a favor and accept his lovin. It will do you both good. You know you want it.

“Well, you got me there. I can’t argue with that. I guess you just earned yourself a girlfriend and some double-glazed bear claws.” You smiled widely.

Tomas was beyond happy. He immediately hugged you and started to kiss you all over your face. Gosh, your skin was so soft against his lips. He could do this for hours. But you’re right, he did earn himself some bear claws.

You both sat around, eating your mistake baked goods together. You both were all smiles. There was a warm feeling that resonated with you. This has got to be the best day ever. Well if it wasn’t for Madame Bo slapping the back of Tomas’ head and yelling at him to leave already and stop eating the sweets. He booked it out of there while laughing, promising to return tomorrow.

Ain’t he just the sweetest?

After notes: Halfway through I ate a coconut cream pie to get motivation. I don't even like coconut but it hit! I feel like a jackass for making flan the favorite dessert in this fic. Idk why I'm not sending subliminal messages to make y'all want it. Ah whatever. Adiós!

[lunadileo]

ღ Astrology Notes ღ

These are my personal observations that I wrote based on people around me and many years of observing them. Happy Holidays! ✨🎄🥂

💕 People with Taurus Venus are naturally such great gift givers. Their taste is impeccable and refind. They’d rather go for an expensive gift of high quality (perfume, jewellery, spa certificate) as they have a very good sense of style. They love spoiling both themselves and their loved ones. 🥰

💕 People with Pisces Moon are very sensitive and compassionate to other people, their emotions and feelings. They naturally tend to be very self-sacrificing and put the comfort and wellbeing of others first, which can often be taken for granted. Nevertheless, people with Pisces Moon are very kind-hearted, talented, intuitive and generous beings. 😍

💕 People with Taurus in the 6th house value comfort so much. They love coming home to coziness and safety every day after work, make a cup of their favourite tea, lay down under the warm blanket and watch their favourite tv series. They love for their days to go as predictable and smooth as possible. They also hate to be in a rush and mostly prefer to laze around the house. ☺️

💕 It’s very important for women with Taurus in the 7th house/Taurus Descendant to find a sense of safety and reliability in their partner. They are traditional and want their partner to take very good care of them and provide for them materially, financially and emotionally. They also love to be spoiled with gifts, receive gorgeous bouquets of flowers, love and attention. 💞

💕 People with Scorpio Rising/Pluto in the 1st house go through many transformations since the beginning of their life. They grow wiser and stronger each time, however, many people can sense constant heaviness and toughness present in their energy. These people emanate the deepest sense of unmatchable power, inner strength and are never scared to face things and people head on. Others never dare to come at them or start arguments. 👁

💕 People with Leo on the 9th house cusp are usually very successful with their studies at universities. They are interested in studying foreign languages, international affairs or intercultural communication. They may also love studying languages, geography and world history at school. Travelling is their biggest passion and motivation. 🗺

💕 People with Aquarius on the 3rd house cusp/Uranus in the 3rd house have very unique and unusual thoughts. They naturally think in an innovative and smart way. They are ahead of their time, in a good way. Many people don’t understand them and find their ideas to be weird and unconventional, not “fitting in”. Natives with these placements don’t care though and learn to accept themselves and voice their opinions over time. 🧠

💕 Men with 10th house stellium tend to be very focused on their career and public life. Their reputation is extremely important to them, they may be afraid of public judgement or being seen in a negative light. In some cases, they may neglect their families (spouses and children) and put the majority of their time and focus only on their work and getting money.

💕 People with Virgo Mars are very good workers. They are dutiful, reliable and organised. They love to complete their tasks one by one in a calm and relaxed manner. Working under pressure is not their biggest strength. 👩🏻‍💻

💕 Women who have Leo Sun Aries Moon usually occupy the leading position at work and tend to be very harsh and demanding bosses. Their colleagues and employees may not feel at ease around them, some may even fear them. Nevertheless, women with these placements are strong and don’t lose their cool in the critical situations, they handle them with confidence and authority. 🔥

💕 People with Venus Conjunct Saturn want to have that “one and only” type of partner, relationship and marriage. They will never commit to the person they don’t trust or connect with just for the sake of being in a relationship. They’d rather wait for the real one that they can build something significant and long lasting with rather than waste their time going from one shallow relationship to another. Very beautiful and thoughtful placement. ❤️

💕 Women with Leo Venus love to be spoiled with expensive gifts, love, adoration and attention. They are very fashionable and love buying designer clothes and items. Moreover, they have a very good sense of self-love and self-respect, that’s why they demand and expect the same treatment from their partner. They will never settle for less than what they think they deserve. 💖

💕 It takes some time for people with Taurus Mercury to process new information. They usually need to reread and repeat certain topics until they’re able to fully grasp it. When they do, they’ll remember the information very well and for a long period of time. People with this placement may also enjoy soft jazz music playing in the background while they are studying. 🎷

© 2022 Credits to my blog @lunadileo ღ

[nothorses]

youre the first person ive seen since biden drop out who seems genuinely positive abt it, everyone else ive seen is being rlly negative or making jokes and it scared me a lot.... can you explain, or link to another post or article, that explains why its good that he dropped out? i keep seeing everyone saying that biden didnt do anything, then that he did so many things, thrn stuff saying kamala is a bad choice to endorse then you sounded so positive abt her and im very confused ): i avoid politics a lot cuz i live w a very protrump dad and its so difficult to find accurate information that isnt seaped in memes and sarcasm and pessimism but you sounded very genuine! thanks for any help <3

I went into more depth over here! I also wanna share a couple of videos I've been getting these perspectives from, because these folks are a lot more educated on the topic than I am.

I first heard the perspective that Biden was woefully unlikely to win from Olayemi Ulurin, in this video. She has a kind of "I can't blame anyone for not voting" perspective that I do think I agree with, largely because she's coming at it with nuance: Biden is not a compelling candidate, he's not likely to win, it makes sense people don't wanna vote for him, and the Democrats need to get their shit together and pick someone else.

She also posted this video (below) that goes way more in-depth into the issue, and which I think reflects (and GREATLY expands and adds to) my personal stance on the "vote blue no matter who" thing: i.e., voting is ultimately about making the fight easier for activists who are working for real change. It's important for that reason, not because the person you vote for can be trusted to do anything helpful of their own volition.

If you're gonna watch any of the videos I link here, watch that one.

The other source I've looked to a lot recently is Some More News, which is where I initially heard a lot more detail on the "Biden should drop out oh god oh please it's our only hope" perspective.

First was their podcast episode immediately following the recent Biden/Trump debate, in which they delve (somewhat casually, but thoroughly) into why Biden's 2024 campaign was so fucking terrifying for everyone who needs a Democrat win:

They also get into more detail on the topic here, in another podcast episode:

Those two videos are great just for understanding this election and why Biden dropping out is very much the best thing that could have happened. That's basically the topic for the full length of both podcast videos (where Olayemi just kind of touches on that specific question, in comparison). If you just want more details on that question and only have the capacity for one of these, you could probably watch either podcast video (I personally have only watched part of the second one, and all of the first one).

I'd also recommend these two channels for political insight in general.

Olayemi is great because she comes at things from an explicitly activist perspective, and she has a huge personal background in very grounded, concrete political activism, especially as a black immigrant woman. She brings in a lot of other experts as well, often themselves marginalized political activists, which is just a fantastic way to be exposed to a really awesome diversity of knowledgeable perspectives without having to look very far on your own. She's also relentlessly hopeful- and grounded in that hope- which is so, so important and refreshing.

Some More News is a good supplementary to Olayemi, imo, just in that they have a good, upbeat (and again, very grounded) energy, and they cover a lot of very current political stuff in an easy-to-digest kind of way. I find both them and Olayemi really fun to watch, but the vibes are definitely different between the two, and they're good counterpoints to each other- plus they tend to cover different stuff, which just helps broaden your awareness of what's going on, again without needing to look super far.

I know this is a lot of information; hopefully I've made it possible to sift through for the piece you actually want to start with, though. If nothing else, I really encourage folks to check out Olayemi and see if any of her videos catch their eye. She's really fantastic, and her stuff scratches my "video to do laundry to" itch while also being, like, a really valuable watch overall.

Best of luck!!

[ukiyowi]

Spirit guides personality and messages

Note: Hope you like it! Reblogs help a ton. I got hospitalised recently and it would be a huge help if anyone would be interested in buying paid readings or tipping! Every little penny helps! Thank you so much 🩷🩷🩷

Pile 1

Personality

Cards: The Devil (rev.), Wheel of Fortune, Queen of Swords.

The strong female energy that's coming through, I heard warrior/generational warrior. Your spirit guide is cold and detached, independent I'm seeing they're very very strong and loyal. They're also extremely powerful, I'm getting that they'll only communicate with you if needed, letting you fight your own battles, however they're very protective. I feel if anyone ever does you wrong, it always comes back to them in the worst way possible. They're someone who's very wise and travelled, they don't like meddling too much. I also get strong maternal energy, so maybe this is a female ancestor. What's funny is when the first two cards fell out, I was thinking of a warrior with flowing hair in an Armor with a sword and then the queen of swords fell out. Again, giving me warrior, very strong and analytical. They're straightforward and blunt, may come off as grumpy or annoyed occasionally. Like their space, someone who's fair and trustworthy. I'm getting they may like things staying the same, they love routine.

Messages

Card: The Tower (rev.)

Stop trying to resist good change. If something is falling apart, it's meant to trying to hold on to it will bring nothing but delay, hurt and harm. Go with the flow, stay true to yourself. Rebuild what was fallen because now by then you'll have learnt from your mistakes.

Song: Lullaby for a cat – Epik High

Pile 2

Personality

Cards: The Moon, Page of Wands, 7 of Pentacles

Okay first message I got is they're very communicative, and may try to talk to you or send messages through your dreams. They may be emotional and irrational at times, I'm also getting may be doting in a way. They seem optimistic and cheerful! I'm getting extremely fun and daring energy, there's not much that scares them probably because of how long they've been around, the kind to have seen everything. They may be a little fast-paced however, I'm getting if you're not progressing fast enough, they may try to step in, guide you in the right direction (or try) so that you can grow faster, they just want what's best for you. They're determined and persistent, very balanced energy, they value stability a lot especially mental and emotional stability and may help you manifest faster. They're selfless and fiercely protective especially against evil eye or the envy of others. You may have a lot of people who dislike you because of your success, your spirit guides protect you from that negative energy so it doesn't manifest into your life.

Messages

Card: Page of Cups (rev.)

Don't let others envy bring you down, nurture your inner child. If you keep working all day every day without giving yourself time to heal and replenish your energy, everything you've worked for will come falling down. It's not easy to forget or forgive the happenings of the past and you don't have to, but stop holding onto them with a vice grip.

Song: Fall - Sasha Sloan

Pile 3

Personality

Cards: The Fools, The Lovers, 3 of Cups (rev.)

First thing that came through: past life lover, a past life lover is your spirit guide, or someone who carries that energy. They can be a little scattered at times but they're youthful and love adventure. They also seem pretty idealistic for better or for worse, I'm also getting they're very patient and understanding, a lot of compassion is coming through. They're agreeable and cordial, I see that they love new beginnings and cycles, they are also extremely abundant in showing their adoration, either through symbols, signs, animals all of that. They're critical by nature, sometimes too much but they try to tone it down I'm hearing and focus on the positives. Yeah, I'm not getting much to be honest, they would love to communicate with you, I hear they use animals a lot as symbolism and can be blunt when giving advice or guidance simply because they feel like sugar-coating is a waste of your time.

Messages

Card: Page of Pentacles

You've worked very hard so far, keep that up, there's new things coming into your life that will send you back in motion. Lay your foundations before building your empire, don't sway from the goals you set and you'll be good to go. Remember to stay humble and grounded, meditate.

Song: Older - Shallou

All rights reserved, do Not plagiarise. Ukiyowi©®

[psychelis-new]

pick a pile: "Loving letter from your higher self"

take a breath and choose the photo or number that calls you the most to read about what your higher self would like to tell you right now and how they may want to encourage you or show you the way to reach for them.

don’t take the reading too seriously. only take what resonates with you and leave the rest. if you're not called by any pile, let this reading slid as it may not hold messages for you. if you're called by more than one pile, there may be messages in each of those piles. remember that is a general reading and some things may not resonate with you. energies can change and readings are based on present ones (as you read); you're always in charge of your life.

(photos found on unsplash)

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1 2 3 4 - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 1

Darling, it's time to heal the past. What do you want to say? What do you want? Who cares what others say, just go. Follow your guts. And if it won't go well, you've tried, you'll have nothing to blame yourself for and you know you won't have regrets or live in fear. I know you're scared, I was too. So much scared. We are humans, it's okay to be scared of what we don't know, of life in general. But we need to be true to ourselves. Take a pause and have a chat within us. It's time to stop giving up or renouncing to things for others or even just because we don't feel they belong to us... we are doing it for what? For sure, we're not getting prizes for this. It's our life, nobody else matters. So just be you, let's just be us. Listen to us. To our heart. If people will ever judge us negatively or think we're any less, it's their problem not ours. Stop thinking about them. Take charge. Regain control. Stand up for yourself, free yourself. It's all in your hands. You need to realize deep down all your worth, all your desires, and start working towards them, no matter what else will come in between. You're deserving of love, and much more. People come, people go, there's nothing fixed, not even in their words or thoughts: they're all as uncertain and insecure as us. Do you really want to have such an unstable source validating and guiding you? You're the only one who needs validating yourself, ourselves. But you need to start doing it for yourself, only yourself. Not because of others and what you fear they'll think of you or if you'll hurt them. You have feelings too. You are important too. So, what do you want? Whatever it is, know that you can get it or at least try to get it, no matter how difficult it seems now. No matter how impossible. And even if you won't get it at first or at all, it'll be fine anyway. But be you, and consider trying a new road if you need. I'll wait for you here. I have trust in you, so trust us too.

[you may be called by pile 4 too; letter A may be important; your letter kinda reminds me of the dialogue on the beach between Adrian -with the A, love it- and Rocky in Rocky III, where you are Rocky and your higher self is Adrian asking you for truth; there's a chance you're trying to manifest love -any type- or feeling lovable: you are, simply cause you're here. You don't need to do or be anything in particular to be lovable and/or find love, just believe you deserve]

song: open your eyes | hoobastank

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pile 2

Dear one, I know things are pretty confusing right now. I know you feel stuck and as if you were keep working on the same thing but cannot see a way out of it. But keep strong for a little more, would you? I know you wanna give up sometimes, just let go, sleep it all away... Take a nap then. Give yourself a break and then start all over again. More corageously, more bravely, more focused and determined on your goal. It is not time to give up: you don't know what may happen if you hold on for a little more. It's all I am asking you: hold on. I know it seems a lot on some days, but on those days just give yourself a break. Start again on better days, even if it's after a week or two. But do not completely give up, especially not on you, not on us. Be strong willed as I know you are, as I know we are. All the scrapes in our soul will be healed, we'll find peace. This I promise you. Curl in into yourself, embrace yourself as if you were in an egg. You're going to be born again soon. I know you cannot see it now, but you will. You are your own (our own) embryo. So take your time to work on you, learn to treat yourself with kindness and love, and get ready to be born into a new person. The amazing person you already are inside but aren't aware of. The amazing person you'll realize you are one day soon. Let our insticts guide you: they never really failed you, unless when you let our mind in. Find a different way to look at the problem: this will be the start of it all. Find your own reasons, find your own real self. Re-connect with your core. Re-learn how to talk with yourself. Everything will change. Everything is changing. Take care of you, I am always here. You are not alone, and you're not supposed to stay alone or do anything alone. Once you feel ready, get out of the shell. The world is waiting, and I am waiting for you too. I am waiting to show you all the beautiful things you deserve.

[letter T may be important; you're transforming into another you atm, I keep seeing this person in an embryo with their eyes closed, in a fetal position; atm you may be undergoing a huge change but also an internal battle: the advice is to take your time and learn more about yourself; if you fear going deep inside alone cause you don't know what you will find, ask for help; it's hard to keep the focus, maybe you are easily distracted or suffer from adhd/ocd or are dealing with too many things at times and are overwhelmed... try to find ways to distract from this and calm your mind; talk with someone, even your Guides or anyone really; if you're grieving, give yourself time to go through the whole porcess, maybe learn about it online -a positive message/sign may be coming in soon; drink water and stay hydrated, ily<;3]

song: with me | sum41

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 3

Hello little one! It's time to write your own story! Are you ready? There's gonna be big things and little things, big random stuff and smaller ones, big changes and smaller ones...remember to keep in consideration all of them. And never despise little things as they may carry the most valuable experiences for you. Be open to anything my love! It's time to be brave and get our there and show who you are, be proud of what you did and who you grew to be. I am. I really am. You're kind, determined, strong and so energetic... and you totally need to be hyped and get ready for this new start. You're not seeing anything now, you need to trust. To leave the past behind and go forward with all your positivity and good luck by your side (you have it!!). Feel it in your bones, follow that feeling. Take this leap of faith and trust you'll end up where you have always dreamed of. I know there are still some things that make you feel unsure or feel like willing to postpone this jump in the unknown, but trust me: if you'll wait for the day you'll feel ready, you may even wait forever. Let this go. Okay, okay. Maybe I'm trying to rush you a bit. Okay. Got it. Keep healing what is causing you stress inside, have a deeper look, understand yourself, ourselves, maybe take a break from all the people/socials and the stress of internet and its messages so to really focus on what is important for you and how beautiful you really are... but then please PLEASE *praying hands emoji* jump! Jump all force, jump big. Do not make a little random insecure step and an awful dive, we need to jump and take all the 10s we can from the 10 meters trampoline! I promise it's gonna be fine. SO-VERY-FINE. I'm so excited for you babe!

[your higher self is very funny and cheering, their expression/face remind me of an old tv sketch in which Jerry Lewis pretended to use an imaginary type-writer; I am also seeing this emoji •ᴗ•; letters E and R may be important; maybe diving or swimming or any sport related to water can be important for you or water can be of help/healing -even swimming in a swimming pool; also time is very important, either as divine timing or as taking time for yourself or... "making it in time"? If you're stressing about running out of time, don't. You're plenty of time]

song: time | ellaharp

- ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ - ’ -

pile 4

My love there's so much you can't see! But I want you to be ready and learn to receive, to be so bold you ask for the highest prize and wait for it to be delivered to your door. You are in charge of your own life and you know it, so just stand tall in it and forget doubts: these only hinders you. Don't be afraid, you're not asking for anything too much, and it's not up to you to decide what is too much and what not. You did a lot, you grew up so much... And it has been tough, I know. Many of the things that happaned to you, you didn't deserve them, but trust that all your effort is not going unseen. Higher forces are at work for you, to give you back something after all you gave. I know it seems impossible to change what has been, to start something new, to experience something new. To even think about all this makes you dizzy, right? And kinda stresses you cause at the moment, everything is still in the making, "it's all so quiet"... but it's the calm before the storm. And I know you know storms so well. You have seen many. And for this reason, because you've seen how things can change during and after a storm, I want you to believe that things can change for you too. That you can get what you wish for. That it's time to change course of things, to let the wind blow you in the right direction. You'll be getting a news soon, just remember to get infos about it before answering and to not get your self doubts or insecurities in between. We have learned our lessons, it's time to put them into practice. Do not let anyone fool you. We need to make a different move/decision, if we want to have a different result. And I know you have all it takes to make it. I am here for this reason, in fact. Thank you.

[you may be called by pile 1 too; letters V, T, C and O may be important; bjork song "it's oh so quiet" may hide messages for you; if you want to fall in love, you are getting ready to or falling in love with yourself first now; you may like windy days or like to sail or be air dominant/have air signs especially in the big 3]

song: (crack it) something going on | bomfunk mc's ft. jessica folcker

[thatgirlie-diaries]

Week 5 - #100DayReinvention Progress log ୨୧

Original challenge by @dreamdolldiary

Hello girlies! Welcome to the fifth log of this challenge. I am actually so excited for the start of a new month and grateful for all the progress and moments I lived in October. Last month I was focused on achieving, having the base for my habits and goals. Now that I now what I need to do and what I love, in this month alongside progressing with my goals I will focus on being healthier, softer and prettier as so buying new items and going on girly dates.

𝐈. My weekly progress

Health: Did pilates once, slept at 10pm some days and ate healthier in general (my sleeping schedule and diet are things that are costing me to have in a good state, but I'm making progress), my skin is clearer and hair is healthier.

Academic: finished my Italian online and physical exercises, got an 100 on my 3rd Italian test, got all my academic tasks done in time

Adulting: no new progress

Hobby: began reading a book (It didn't start with you), feel more confident with my cheer skills, wrote 3 blogs this week

Social: played with my dog, spent more time with my friends and being social. celebrated halloween at uni and at cheer

Healing: meditated and practiced yoga in the morning and at night, currently using frequencies, indulged in manifestation and soft living

Style: makeup looked more flawless, learned new hairstyles

𝐈𝐈. I need to work on

Sleep earlier to wake up earlier - To achieve this I will reduce my electronic consumption and be commited to sleep and wake up at the time I stablished

Eat healthier - I already eat healthy, but sometimes I'm lazy to cook and fall into the junk food trap. I will meal prep each week and chose interesting meals and new recipes for me to be motivated. Also drink more water, I will add fruits to make it appealing

Sensorial rest - Use screen timers, listen to music on scecific times and not as a distraction, less sound and earphone usage, lean on more to stillness and be alone with myself

Work on my mental diet - Be aware of my thoughts and what I'm focusing on. I will choose positive feelings, positive affirmations and discard any negativity towards myself, situations or other people

Be brave and open minded to fail to achieve the goals that I fear - I heard someone said once "If it scares you, it's because it's meant for you"

𝐈𝐈𝐈. Next week I will focus on

Based on my experiene from October and last week, I will focus all around the month to balance my consistent progress and focusing on leveling up my healthy and feminine lifestyle (diet, pampering, hobbies, productivity, energy, mindset, social skills, buying new itenms, etc) so this week I will mainly focus on this.

See you next week, girlies! Wish me luck and love 𑄽𑄺ྀ

[nohoperadio]

I was kind of irritable and low-mood at work today, to the point where--well I don't think I was a dick to anyone, but I was putting noticeably less effort into being positive and agreeable with people than I normally would. I was also putting less effort into being positive in my own, like, internal monologue I guess?

I feel like maybe that sounds tautologous, being less positive inside your head is just what low-mood means right, but I don't think it is actually. In normal circumstances, if there's an unpleasant task to do or some piece of annoying bad luck has occurred or something of that general nature is happening, I'm devoting some portion of my mental energies towards making myself see the situation in a constructive light: try to focus on what can be done instead of dwelling on bad shit that can't be undone, and if I catch myself going over in my mind how this is totally so-and-so's fault and why are they such a dick etc. then I'll tell myself to knock it off and try to move on to a more pleasant train of thought; also tons of smaller mental motions than that, too small to describe. All these pat clichés everyone knows, serenity prayer stuff. It works a good amount of the time, I think I may be uncommonly good at it actually (possibly too good at it in some situations, maybe that's a different selfpost), being calm is usually a thing I can pull off without much trouble, outside of certain (admittedly pretty significant) specific anxiety triggers.

But today I felt like I lacked the emotional energy to do that, and I made an almost conscious decision that I just wasn't going to bother with any of it, so like if I'm doing an unpleasant task I'll just let the thought "ugh this sucks" have the floor for as long as it wants, if someone's being annoying I'll just let myself hate them and not bother reminding myself how they're actually a lovely person most of the time, and so on. And like--this didn't result in a dramatically different day from normal, to be clear. Largely because there wasn't actually that much bad stuff happening, it was a pretty chill day objectively, it's not like I'm constantly having to repress a flood of negative thoughts in my daily life (not lately anyhow!). But it's interesting to me how--when I made that decision, that I wasn't going to try to think positively for the day, I could feel the mental muscles that would normally be in charge of that relaxing. Like there was a certain vigilance that's usually being kept up in my head constantly that was given explicit permission to take a day off, and there was (ironically!) a different kind of calm feeling that came with that, which I don't think I feel very often. There was a peaceful feeling in there, co-existing with the overall bad mood, that was comparable to unclenching a muscle you hadn't noticed you'd been holding tight for a long time.

Why do I find this interesting? Well just on the most abstract level it's an example of how stuff like "mood" isn't one-dimensional: in this example I was experiencing a negative mood, and that meant I couldn't be bothered to maintain a particular way of thinking, and turning off that way of thinking had (among other effects!) an effect that felt positive. A positive feeling that's causally downstream of a negative feeling and wouldn't have emerged without the negativity: there's probably all kinds of counterintuitive little interactions like that going down in our psyches all the time, and probably a much broader variety of different non-overlapping axes along which we can feel good or bad, which we tend to smush all together into an "average" mood that's maybe more of an abstraction than we realize.

On a more concrete, personal level: I don't know, there might be some stuff about how I'm too scared of negativity and could stand to let the impatient disagreeable bitch inside me have a little more air. Maybe some shit like that is something that's true. Yeah idk this is the part of self-analysis where I usually start to get bored.

[itsdeniini]

OMG, hi!! I've become a huge fan of your work, it's so pretty the aesthetic and everything, I really enjoy reading your posts 💕

Can I ask for a twin flame reading for Jungwon?

˚୨୧ 🍵💭 ⊹ ࣪ ˖ hi c: ty for ur kind words boo ! here is the : JUNGWON'S TWIN FLAME TAROT READING >ᡣ𐭩<

໒꒱🌱⠈⠂. n 0 t e 〃

♡1: i am a self-taught tarot reader, and the interpretations i provide are personal. if anyone would like to share their own insights, i would be more than happy to hear them! please be kind <3

♡2: in this reading, I will be talking about a person from the future and how their relationship will progress at the moment when they are already know each other; that's the twin flame that he's yet to meet.

GENERAL READING 𓆤

Jungwon's twin flame is currently trying to work with him on how to mold their lives together to be one in the physical aspect. There could be talks to meet up, important phone conversations, being honest, open, and vulnerable with one another. And part of Jungwon is ready to accept this, but part of him is hesitant due to the turmoil in the past; he doesn’t want to repeat another cycle and end up with The Ten of Wands, and that's the only thing that's holding him back. At the same time, I feel Jungwon has successfully broken through any negative thought patterns that prevent him from moving forward in his own life because I pulled out all the other 10’s of the tarot deck here, EXCEPT for the Ten of Wands, so that's very good! The only ones here are the wands, but this is recent past energy he has either finished moving through or will be moving through. Next in his current energy, I have The Knight of Cups, The Ten of Pentacles, and The Eight of Swords, so this really tells me he has a slight fear of this connection finally taking off because it would mean that it enters into a new cycle that he doesn’t know exactly how it’s going to go because it won’t be easy because his twin flame is a mischievous and unpredictable person, and this scares him beyond anything. What he doesn’t see with this is that on the other side of fear (the moon) is the Ten of Cups. This is quite literally everything he's been wishing for and manifesting. And this is something that will be in balance, indicated not only with the Six of Pentacles but also with the Temperance right next to it and the Nine of Cups. He will keep pushing through his fear; the turbulence of separation is falling away naturally, and this is meant to let it fall gracefully as he sheds previous layers to move into your true divine happiest self. They’ve had or will have breakthroughs that will be long-lasting and will bring happiness and the opportunity for new beginnings.

Now on to the near portrait of Jungwon's twin flame:

☀️ In Cancer

First of all, she is a girl and is a very intuitive person with a lot of knowledge. Her intuition comes naturally. She likely relies on her gut feelings and has a strong inner knowing that guides her decisions. When she is off her professional field, she is often sensitive, emotional, and deeply connected to her home and twin flame. Being a water sign, she can easily pick up on Jungwon's emotions, understanding him like nobody else.

Influences: 🪐♅

Saturn’s influence suggests that she's a person who values hard work, has a strong sense of duty, and approaches life with a mature and realistic attitude. Uranus’s influence indicates that she's a person who is original, forward-thinking, and possibly unconventional. She may embrace new ideas and technologies, often standing out for her uniqueness. Also I can associate her overall energy with the Solar Plexus Chakra from the 7 Chakra system, it is associated with personal power, self-confidence, and control. A strong Solar Plexus Chakra suggests she is someone who is confident, has a strong sense of self, and can assert her willpower effectively.

Personal Style:

She has a preference for classic, elegant, and professional attire, like suits and ties for example. She values a polished and put-together appearance, likely reflecting her disciplined Saturn influence.

Interests and Passions:

EDM/Dubstep Music >.< This genre of music aligns with the innovative and unconventional traits of Uranus. She's into Enhypen music a lot; that's just her style. Her favorite song could probably be Go Big or Go Home or any other song that Enhypen will release in the future with this sound. Additionally, she may be into self-care and exploring new technologies that could make her appearance better; she is most likely attending cosmetologists and facial massages quite often, not forgetting also about make-up and hair salons.

Career:

She's most probably not from the showbiz field, although she may actively run a page on Instagram or any other social media; I would say she is implicated in the medical field, or perhaps she is an educator or teacher.

Personal Traits:

Dark hair

Dry sense of humor

Family-oriented

Egotistical (mostly at the work place)

Materialistic

Protective

Tan Skin (she may be of a mixed race or have it naturally)

[guardian5tiger3]

Pick a picture tarot reading

Whatever comes out

Groups

1 2

3 4

Group one

You guys need to or are letting the past go in order to step into better energy(ies).

However you've been feeling be it trapped, or stuck, maybe depressed,negative in some way it's pretty different depending on the person, but regardless, the point is sort of that that all doesn't and definitely won't matter soon. You all are needing to /are finding a balance between your masculine and feminine sides of yourself. If not those energies some type of balance within yourself. That will then reflect onto your outer world. You all are manifesting something and it is a very refreshing energy. It may be something bad or negative being exposed. It is some kind of truth coming out for most of you. If somebody did something negative they're definitely not getting away with it. Even and actually especially if you don't already know about it. Soon you will. Or at least someone that can and will do or say something about it will know.

Could also just be the universe itself setting that right somehow

Group two

It kind of seems like something was brought up and put to an end. But maybe it still is happening or someone is still doing something OR has the potential too. This is a super strange reading I'm getting a lot of different super specific scenarios. So for instance ,if someone is enjoying something that is yours and is from your energy like maybe your roommate or family has someone over and they eat your food. Or for someone animals or bugs are eating food or herbs out of your garden/yard whatever. I'm getting something about a church so maybe something for one of you is going on like that at your church it seems like it's talked about. So you all have a problem like this so in terms of a solution for all of you.. some of you need other people's help, some of you need to have your guard up, maybe a camera , maybe a fence put up.some of you the ending already put to this is good enough though especially if or it would work if you did something to scare someone like set up something to make a loud noise. I am also very much getting to tell you all that this situation is very dependent on how you look at it. You could be like, oh how cute a squirrel is eating my plants :)... Or , hey somebody is in need I'm glad they're looking to my energy because that would be generous of me to help or to give. Whatever it may be.

Group three

Someone is doing mental manipulation on you. Maybe they're just saying things to make you depressed, some of you someone is doing magic on you, maybe even mind control. Especially if you're in a state of rest or some type of keeping it lowkey or even just depression lately. Also if you've just been sleeping a lot. Something like that. This is cause the universe is meant to be gifting you something right now. It's especially about home life for a lot of you. Also for a good few of you your love life. Maybe getting a new dog for someone. Moving homes to somewhere better for another few. You guys need to accept a negative energy for being negative , have strength over it and move on. It will be better after you do so. For some reason this is reminding me that yesterday I was so tired but I still decided to , and did work out anyway. I needed it and I did and do feel better but like you guys it just seems like, hey keep going even though you're tired or feeling like you wanna lay low right now. Inner strength. Now is the time to keep going.

Group four

You all have an angel guiding and helping you. Especially about anything you might not see or know, or going through something that isn't fully clear to you what's really going on. This could be a living person or a spirit. If anything bad happened in your past or especially childhoods just know that somebody did see it or knows or believes you and they understand and it will be made right. For some of you I'm getting the energy of two different males or for someone, one very two faced one. Seems like people who have done something wrong to someone else. What spirit wants you guys to know and what they want you to do is to build yourself up, in some way and for some of you build a foundation for yourself or something. Focus on and make sure you're good when it comes to money. Trust spirit in this as well. Like I said, you're all being guided. You should listen to some calming and or sweet music if that makes sense. That's how I know to word the energy I just got. I'm thinking about the grateful dead but that's just me.

[catboybiologist]

1 month HRT update and journal thingy!

So as I said in my pinned post, I'm gonna be doing a monthly kind of progress check on HRT. Well, it's been 32 days, so here it is! Here's some measurements of interest:

But, I found that the raw measurements, and a single "other column" wasn't sufficient to really catalogue my experience. So I wrote a long, probably overly detailed account of some of the things I've experienced in the past month.

And holy shit, what a month it's been.

So first off, lets start with what’s not happening. Some good, some bad. I think I missed the skin softness gene or something. I’ve really noticed no change in skin texture, and that’s often cited as the first noticeable physical change from HRT. My skin was somewhat soft before, but nothing like the transfemmes I know irl, so this was a bit disappointing. But in all honesty, it’s not that big of a deal.

The other thing that I haven’t noticed yet is a reduced aerobic capacity or physical ability. I’m sure this will come in time, but the interesting thing here is that one of my main physical activities, freediving, is actually a far more direct measurement of aerobic capacity than most others. I can’t do this in nearly a consistent enough way to actually log it, but my casual breath hold times in the couple of times I’ve been freediving since starting HRT haven’t changed. On a fairly standard dive, I usually stay down 60-70 seconds, and that’s still true. With good prep and good air conservation on the bottom (I like to hold onto rocks and kelp, and stay motionless while looking around lol), I can get 90 seconds or beyond (I don’t like pushing it). Part of the problem is that so much of this is variable, and is highly dependent on how good my equipment prep is that day (insulation and weighting), water conditions (cold and rough=more energy=shorter dives), and my boy physiology (how much I’ve eaten, caffeine intake, etc). But in general, I haven’t noticed major physical fitness changes yet. 

Weight gain has been intermittent. I’ve always been a bit swingy on my weight, and can easily go +/- 5lbs in no time at all. At one point, I was 4lbs over my pre-HRT weight (3 week interval), but now I’m down to 1 pound over. My waist is slightly thinner than it was pre-HRT, but that seems to be normal fluctuation. Where did the extra 1-3lbs go? We’ll get to that, LOL.

My waist measurement hasn’t changed, but anecdotally, I do think there’s changes going on there. The 43 inches measurement is still at my widest point, around my thighs (which have always been pretty good). Now, however, I’m noticing what seems to be some growth on areas that aren’t covered by the exact circle I’m using to measure that. My butt seems slightly bigger, although I could just be lying to myself. Time will tell.

Onto the stuff that has changed!

Mood. Oh my god mood. My resting state is no longer a crackling misery. I don’t think I was ever suicidal because of dysphoria alone, but I was certainly pushed to that point far, far easier when it was a contributing factor. I also just… didn’t enjoy anything about my body. When I was happy, it was a distraction. Now, it’s already much better. I still don’t like my body. I got a long way to go. But, I’m seeing progress, and it’s been incredible.

Emotions overall have been more intense. I’ve had a couple of downswings, and I get misty eyed easier. I haven’t had a proper cry yet, though. I get excited about things again, which was a COMPLETELY dead feeling. And I have also gotten angry at some things, which is also something I killed as a teenager because I was scared of where it took me. It hasn’t been as uncontrollable as I expected, however, and the negative emotions I’m experiencing more viscerally have been immensely cathartic. 

            And then, there's the big one. Hopefully that's literal. And that's breast growth. Almost immediately I noticed some kind of perking up, but no breast bud formation and no immediate growth. At about week 2, I was able to feel the distinct disks of breasts buds under my nipples, and my bust size started increasing. Now, at 4.5 weeks in, my bust size is 1.5 inches larger than it was pre-HRT.

           This is ludicrously fast. As in, so fast it has me questioning if I'm actually intersex or something. I think my E levels will be enlightening.

I really, REALLY don’t want to get too hopeful. But overall, if some of these trends continue… I’m gonna get a LOT curvier. Honestly, my ideal body would be pretty tight and trim… but I’m fucking estatic anyways. I’m just really, really hoping that the breast growth trend continues, and also that the tiny observations I’ve made about a bigger butt and thinner waist are actually real. I don’t know how long I’ll be able to boymode like this LMAO.

There’s also the opposite fear: if my estrogen levels are too high, it could signal the end of “puberty” too early. It’s looking like a possibility, but I gotta wait until next week for my levels check.

There’s one final set of observations I wanna put here, but y’all gotta not be weird about it LOL. I WILL block you and erase this part if you treat this as anything more than impartial observations about myself. Got it? Good. NSFW warning for the next bit.

I want to make some remarks on libido and erogenous sensitivity in general, because that has also been one of the most notable changes.

First off, I heard so many stories about HRT killing libido. Holy fuck, this has not been true for me. I’m going crazy sometimes LOL. I absolutely have a somewhat higher libido on average, but its already changed the way its expressed itself.

First off, my entire body is more sensitive to erogenous soft touch. The right kind of touch and care on my waist will feel very similar to more traditional erogenous zones. I’ve NEVER had this before, and was completely blindsided by it. I’m absolutely fascinated by what neural change caused that, but its really cool even if I don’t know the underlying explanation.

Second off, my libido spikes and hot flashes sometimes. I think this is pretty typical of anyone going under a hormonal change, and tbh I’m not surprised.

Third off is the weirdest one, and something that I’ve asked other transfemmes about, and none have been able to answer. My chest sensitivity seems to be going through very distinct mini-cycles, on the approximate span of time being one full “cycle” per week. Essentially, when I started HRT, my chest first got very sore, itchy, and sensitive to sources of pain and itchiness. It stayed like that for a few days, and then all sensitivity to the area cut out. My nipples pre-HRT were always more sensitive than other cis men, and in this phase, they were actually less sensitive than they were pre HRT. This lasted another couple of days… and then there was a period of massively increased erogenous sensitivity. Soft touches made me wild, and I started wearing  bra not for the support, but to block my shirt from rubbing against them and distracting me. Holy FUCK, this phase is insane. And then after that, they went back to sore again, and then dead again, and then erogenous again. Right now, I’m in the erogenous “phase” of what I think is the fourth cycle here since I started HRT. I have no fucking clue what’s going on. It’s not the period that some trans women report getting, its not a monthly thing. It might just be my body adjusting strangely to new hormones in general, but yeah. Its weird, bc it seems like a pretty unique thing. 

So yeah. That’s a journal thing. I had a LOT more thoughts about HRT starting beyond just the initial measurements, because so much hit me way faster than I thought it would, so I wanted to write something long form. I think I’m going to write something similar each month along with my measurements update, but I expect future writing to be much, much shorter. It’s been incredible so far, but I’m guessing less will be novel- I think things will only be different when I change aspects of my HRT regimen. We’ll see.

[hwnglx]

skz love life update?

here you go anon ♥︎

who in stray kids is dating? dec '23

based on tarot. i do not know these idols personally. energies are always changing. what i say is NOT straight fact. pls take it with a grain of salt!

bang chan

is he dating? 4osw, 9ow, 6op, pagosw, ju, 7ow, 7op

no, he isn't. bangchan is someone very very careful.. about his actions, about who he lets his into his life and who he decides to dedicate his time and energy to. i'm getting this feeling that right now, his main focus is on his self-development as a person. being a more generous and giving man, making sure to always do the right thing, standing strong as a leader, work hard and tirelessly in order to secure a better future for his team. his focus isn't on relationships right now. he's putting his effort into being a good influence on the people around him, and isn't interested in starting anything romantic for now.

minho

is he dating? 4owrx&kingocrx+10ow, 4oc, 5osw, kingop, knosw

my god, what a mess.. my brain kept going, yes he is, no he isn't, yes he is, no he isn't. i can see there is someone in his life, however things seem to be pretty complicated for them. there is this sense of instability and a lot of immature and overly emotional reactions going on, which is causing the relationship to tire minho out. he's trying his best to not let the negative emotions consume him, but he's feeling kinda hopeless about this connection. he's focusing on work in order to distract himself.

the knight of swords just flew out, even when i stopped shuffling.. i'm getting bad energy from this person i can't lie, they seem very impulsive and obnoxious. minho feels like they're provoking him a lot and making his irrational sides come out more, which he hates. very messy energy for him.

changbin

is he dating? 7oc, 4osw, 9ow, 3ow, aceoc&dev, 7op, aceow&4oc

no, he isn't. changbin seems to have some hesitations towards dating. he might be the type to get obsessed or overly attached to people once they start engaging romantically, and he doesn't really like this feeling of losing himself in that emotion. he feels like love is a pretty emotional manner for him, and he doesn't like that standing in the way of everything else in his life. like once he dates, they're on his mind a lot, he can't focus on much else. losing "control" of himself in that way, makes him feel like he's turning into a "worse" version of himself. (struggling to express this in the right words, english third language lol bare with me) he's consciously making the decision to lay low and not start anything, although he seems to have a lot of people interested in him. he's deliberately delaying and waiting it out.

hyunjin

is he dating? 8ow&5op, hier&queoc&7ow, kingow&mo, 4oc

no, he isn't. but, still holding on to the same person after twenty light years (almost)

i don't think i've ever read for any idol who screams pisces energy (esp venus) the way hyunjin does.. he's literally just allowing himself to be ran over and led on from this person he can not let go of, even if his life depended on it ☹︎

this person has feminine energy and is likely to be a water sign, they seem to be a pretty powerful figure, someone wealthy or with a lot of authority. he's still trying to talk to them sometimes, but the person isn't really giving him much back. he's feeling lonely and pretty empty, but he's still very attached to them. he's scared to end things, and afraid of losing his grip on them.

there also seems to be someone with more masculine energy and fire placements who could play a signifcant role for him. however, whatever they have seems to be very uncertain und confusing. the four of cups in the end is showing me, that hyunjin is feeling very dissatisfied, but trying his best to push his intense emotions aside.

jisung

is he dating? know&kingow, pagop, 6osw, 10ow, 4ow&3oc

no, he isn't. he seems to have recently moved on from a relationship, that might've caused him a lot of self-doubt and insecurities. jisung often gives me this slightly awkward energy when it comes to dating, because he subconsciously puts so much pressure on himself to satisfy the people he's with.. he's easily inclined to feeling like he isn't doing enough. like they aren't happy in the relationship, or believe he's very lacking, or not being the best partner. he struggles with that pressure a lot and doesn't like it, which is why he ends up distancing himself in order to "run away" from that negativity.

the four of wands and three of cups is a pretty good sign though. he isn't really lonely, and still surrounding himself with friends. he often gave me this vibe of being great at remaining friends with his exes.. it's likely he hasn't ended the relationship on very bad terms.

felix

is he dating? 4oc&fo, dev&6op, 7oprx

no, he isn't. felix is trying to take a more light approach to love right now, because he can easily engage in unhealthy and toxic habits, especially when it comes to himself. he's a huge people pleaser. he doesn't like hurting or offending people, so he ends up being nice to everyone, which can quickly give off the wrong impression or send misleading signals to his suitors. he's bad at being direct and truthful about his feelings.

he's trying his best to not give into these bad habits of his, but it isn't as easy. tbh, his energy is pretty confusing right now. he himself seems very lost on how to proceed, it seems like he's either being all "whatever, i shouldn't care so much", or blaming himself a lot for creating so many problems with his unresolved inner issues..

seungmin

is he dating? sun, 2oc, aceop, char, 2ow

yes, he is. seems to be the same person i picked up on first time i read for skz, very stable and sweet energy for these two. things are looking harmonious and happy. they have a nicely built foundation of loyalty, seungmin's partner trusts him immensely and vice versa. they give each other a lot of strength and push each other to be more confident in their pursuit of challenging tasks in life. with both the two of cups and the two of wands here, it seems like this relationship is very much based on mutual feelings of love and affection, as well as mutual goals for their connection. they're ready to hold on to each other for years to come. such pleasant energy, really rooting for them.

jeongin

is he dating? know&6oc, 2osw&lov, queop

hmm, no. not dating. but, i can see there's someone with feminine energy and earth placements in his life, who he's having something with. it seems to be a more physical connection, where they don't wanna put the label "boyfriend/girlfriend" on it. they're likely to be older than him, pretty mature energy.

(jeongin didn't rlly wanna share much more, he's just having fun ☺︎)

[starsurface]

hi.. did tumblr eat my request for general caregiver fujin headcanons? i could have sworn i requested that unless i'm just crazy?

Awh I've had that happen to me too!! Sometimes request don't fully send? Like, you need to get that small Tumblr notification that states that it was sent? It happens very rarely though, don't worry :]

Luckily you resent another request!! :D

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

CG Fujin Hcs

☁️ Such a good CG!!! <3

☁️ Really good with a lot of ages!!

☁️ Doesn't specialize with any age, but is incredibly good with clingy regressors

☁️ Adores cuddling and spending time with you, your his most important thing right now

☁️ Well, your his most important thing period, but when your small your his main priority

☁️ Has pushed some of his God responsibilities off just for you <3

☁️ Raiden lectured him later for it though >:(

☁️ Speaking about Raiden, Fujin would highly encourage little playdates between you two!!

☁️ Fujins really strong, and he really likes carrying you

☁️ So this works incredibly well if you regress smaller

☁️ Mortals very much amuse him very much

☁️ Which means you amuse him so, so much

☁️ Learnt that younger mortals need a nap and encourages you to take one, especially if you regress tiny

☁️ He'll dress you in soft jammies, brush your hair, you'll have a whole routine

☁️ He’ll also cuddle you!!! Loves to cuddle during naptime (even if he doesn't sleep)

☁️ Won't force you to take a nap if you don't wanna though

☁️ If your scared of naps (such as monsters under the bed or such) he'll cuddle you extra tight and get you a dream catcher

☁️ He'll also get magic Monster Go Away Spray!!! (a trick he learnt from a parent app, actually)

☁️ Thinks it's really funny when you get a burst of energy, and then crash asleep

☁️ Is very patient when you have tantrums or hissy fits

☁️ He'll let you scream and cry, especially if it's over big negative feelings, but stays by incredibly close so you don't hit or throw anything

☁️ If you do he'll gently grab your wrists or quickly catch whatever you throw

☁️ He'll scold you later for it, probably when your big again and can have a better conversation

☁️ But right now, he wants to make sure your okay

☁️ He'll gently rock you and say that everything's okay

☁️ Doesn't really do punishments, but will scold you if your being naughty on purpose

☁️ Believes outside time is very important!!!

☁️ Whether that's going outside and playing with his kite, or sitting on the grass with some toys and a blanket

☁️ Will encourage you to pull pranks on the Monks and his friends (and take any backlash so you don't get in trouble)

☁️ He'll make you ‘fly’ in the air with his powers (making a burst of wind beneath you)

☁️ Safely though!!! He'd never do it if you didn't want to either

☁️ Will sit you on a blanket and then put you in the air (like a magic carpet ride fr Aladdin!!)

☁️ If your a bigger kid, you'll still get treated like a toddler >:(

☁️ But don't worry!! Just tell him and he'll treat you more your age (or try, it's a process)

☁️ Thinks pet regressors are really cute and funny and will watch you roll along the ground

☁️ Gives the best head scratchies and tummy rubs!!!

☁️ If you're ever sick while your tiny, it takes everything out of him not to pick you up and hold you closely :(

☁️ It's just, your all tucked in bed looking like ‘🥺’ but he knows that if he holds you, he'll get sick too :(

☁️ Tries to get you yummy medicine, and will make you some nice warm milk

☁️ Very good with if you use diapers and will buy you ones with cute designs!!

☁️ His hair is very long and he'll let you brush it, and will redirect you if you pull on ks hair

☁️ Will brush your hair any time of the day, absolutely loves brushing and styling it!!

☁️ Favorite CG nicknames are Dada, Fuu Fuu, and Cloudy

☁️ Favorite little nicknames to call you are Sweetie, Sweetheart, Little One, Baby, Lovely, Bumble Bee

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

They're not the best, but I can always do more!! :D

[cosmicjoke]

As an eruri shipper I wanted to thank you for your callout post. For nearly a year now I have gotten so much hate on my fics that I thought about deleting them, I haven't tho, thankfully. I found out about the spiteful troll and so I did my best to ignore it. However, the hateful comments my work was getting was beyond me because I hardly ever care what people ship or do and was simply minding my business writing what I like only to be told that I'm a jealous loser and I should stop writing Levi together with the "ugly bitch" (referring to Erwin) and that I should touch grass or slit my throat ... which?? And they made it sound like shipping Levi with a man was illegal or that the ship was inappropriate in some way.

I don't know who is really behind those hateful comments but if it's really her I hope karma hits her way very hard. Don't tell people to kill themselves over fiction EVER. That's common decency.

And about some eruris seeing you as an anti shipper. I'll admit I thought you were one as well. It didn't bother me as everyone is free to do whatever they want, but it's a pleasant surprise to know you actually like the ship and write fics for it. If anything, I admire how you can put your shipping goggles aside to write your analyses. It's very impressive.

Don't know if this is relevant but self shippers scare me a bit. Some of them have mean girls energy and I don't want to be attacked so that's why I'm staying on anon🙏🏻

First of all, let me truly thank you from the bottom of my heart for reaching out. It means the world to me, and I admire you for sharing your experience too. I'm super glad to hear that you didn't let the person leaving hateful comments on your stories drive you to delete them. I understand completely where you're coming from, as I've deleted stories of mine in the past due to an overabundance of negative comments. But I've never had anyone actually leave me death threats, or wish for harm to befall me on any of my stories, and to do that is truly the lowest of the low. Not just because it's over something as harmless as a piece of fictional writing, but just in general, it's never okay to wish harm on someone who's never harmed anyone else, or over something as ridiculous as a disagreement.

And yes, given what I've seen from this person on twitter, claiming Erwin is some "old man", they seem to think shipping him and Levi is tantamount to pedophilia, which is so absurd it doesn't even warrant a response. Erwin is at most maybe 5 years older than Levi? If even? They're both in their 30s. Shipping them is totally normal and healthy, lol.

I just think this person has some sort of raging, disgusting prejudice against gay relationships, and they view all gay relationships as perverse in some way. It's truly their problem, not anyone else's. I don't know either if it's the same person I got into an argument with here on tumblr, but so much of the language is the same, and the things they say are so similar to what was being said on twitter and a03, that I'm more than inclined to believe it is the same person. I can only hope my post helps inform more people about them and what a toxic, horrible person they are. Hopefully it will lead to them being blocked so that it isn't so easy for them to harass others. Though I already know they have multiple accounts here on tumblr, since they saw my post and started ranting about it on their blog, even though I had them blocked.

It also means the world to me to know that I've been able to clear up with you my stance on eruri and shipping in general. That was big of you to not be bothered by me when you did think I was an anti, but I'm glad I was able to show you that I'm not. I'm really, really not, lol. I love eruri. It's my favorite ship, and all my favorite AoT fanfics are eruri fics, lol. You can find comments I've left on too many to count at this point. I just try to keep it out of discussions which focus on "Attack on Titan" itself and Levi's role within the story, because I just don't see his relationship with Erwin in canon as romantic. I just think you have to keep the ship separate from canon because if you're going into an analysis of the narrative and Levi's or Erwin's role in it with some preconceived idea that their relationship is romantic in nature, then that's going to color one's ability to objectively analyze the motivations and the reasoning behind both Levi's and Erwin's actions. But I was never, ever against the ship, or against the idea of them being shipped. I think I got the reputation of being an anti because for a long time, I was being inundated with anon asks basically accusing me of being homophobic for saying eruri isn't canon, or anon asks trying to "prove" to me that it is canon and then getting angry at me when I disagreed, or when I lost my patience with them for simply not accepting my stance on this issue. And I think this small group of people then went around to other eruri's and spread to them that I was some sort of aggressive eruri hater. But again, I never was and never will be. I talk more about Levi's relationship with Erwin than any other character, and I find their canon relationship to be incredibly moving and powerful, and further, I love Erwin as a character. One thing I hope all of this will also do is make it clear to other eruri shippers that I'm not against them or their ship at all. I really don't want to be anyone's enemy, least of all eruri shippers. That was never something I set out to do, haha.

But yes, I'm right there with you regarding some self-shippers. Obviously, most of them aren't like this person. Most of them are normal and understand what they write and do is just for fun. But after "Bad Boy" came out, it seemed like the most push back against analysis of that story and its implications came from the self-shipping community, particularly people that seem to actually labor under some sort of delusion of actually, truly being with Levi in a romantic, sexual relationship. I don't understand that at all, because Levi isn't real, lol.

But they seem to get so upset at any discussion of Levi's trauma, or of Levi being affected by his trauma, because acknowledging that trauma and the impact its had on him ruins whatever fantasy, dom-daddy version of Levi it is that they've concocted in their heads. They like to claim Levi is some hard-ass, stoic, unaffected, domineering sex god, because that's what turns them on, and any discussion about what the actual reality of Levi's sexuality would likely be, due to the sexual trauma he's been exposed to, needs to be shut down, because it ruins the fantasy they have. They can't claim that the way they characterize Levi is objective or accurate to canon if Levi's sensitivity or vulnerability as a person is acknowledged, so they like to claim he's not affected at all by his past trauma, that he's just too hardcore to ever succumb to or be profoundly impacted by the things he's lived through. They like to imagine he's just come out the other side totally a-okay and that his stoicism and rudeness is 100% just a product of him being kind of a mean person, again, because they like the idea of being treated meanly by him in a sexual setting.

But Levi isn't a mean person, at all. He's literally the opposite of mean. He's the most thoughtful and considerate character in the series, constantly going out of his way to express his gratitude and ease the suffering of others. He's just awkward, like Dimo Reeves says, and isn't good at filtering his words or expressing himself. That some of these people refuse to acknowledge that the way Levi grew up, the environment he grew up in and the way he was raised, didn't have an impact on his ability to navigate social situations is patently absurd and stupidly unrealistic. It also undermines the severity of abuse Levi suffered in his upbringing, to deny that it had any sort of negative or harmful impact on his ability to interact socially with others. He was raised by a serial killer, for Christ's sake, lol. He wasn't ever taught how to talk to people in a way that would make them more comfortable. He was only ever taught violence and how to kill by Kenny, and he was too young when his mother died to learn anything from her, and he was also abandoned and left on his own at the age of ten, in the most cutthroat, dangerous environment there is inside the walls, surrounded by criminals, rapist, murderers and human traffickers, as well as just desperate people who would resort to plenty of bad shit just to survive. He probably didn't have a single, normal social interaction in his life until he met Furlan and Isabel. I would like these people to explain to me, then, how it is they think that didn't have an impact on the way Levi interacts with others?

He's an exceptionally honest person, too, and he also isn't someone who's concerned with being well-liked, so he doesn't try to ingratiate himself to others by acting friendly. But Levi never sets out to hurt anyone's feelings. He isn't malicious or cruel. He just says what he's thinking and sometimes it comes out sounding unkind. And we see, when Levi realizes it, that he tries to explain himself, again, not because he wants to be liked, but because he doesn't actually ever intend to hurt anyone's feelings. This idea that Levi is a mean person is totally wrong.

Anyway, I went off on a bit of tangent there, lol. Sorry about that. But again I just want to reiterate how much I appreciate you reaching out like this! And don't let these freak shows get you down.