#not to mention the amount of non-con I see in this fandom is VERY concerning and disturbing and I mean that with my chest | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

its-afucking-mess · 3 years

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A little guide on ao3 (by an ao3 user and writer)

Friendly reminder for mobile users! Ao3 is a website. It doesn't have (as far as im concerned) an official app for mobile, so better get comfy with using crome on your phone.

Some video links ill leave for people who prefer video and audio:

- navigating the fanfiction sites

- popular fandom terminology part 1 and part 2

- shipping etiquette

i really reccomend coley's videos if you want to get to know more fandoms, or get an inside look to how some stuff works. There also might be more vids about fandom's and fan works, so don't hesitate to look through some of her stuff!

the explaining under the 'read more' ao mutuals wont kill me :)

(also tagging @ethanesimp since they asked for this advice )

So, what is Ao3 really?

Ao3 is a website made by fans for fans. There are no ads, and all content is free on Ao3. Anyone can post (with some age restrictions) and they can post anything.

How can I browse Ao3?

Ao3 does not require an account to view stories. You can easily browse as an anonymous user. You just are not able to view certain works, as creators have the ability to show their works to registered users only. Some cases, commenting is possible while anonymous, but again, it's up to the creator of the work.

If you want to be a creator and share works, you need an account.

An account also gives you the ability to bookmark works, so you can re-visit them, mark works for later, keeps a history of the works you've visited and allows you to favourite tags.

How do I get an Ao3 account?

When you first open the site, it gives you the option to "Get Invited". An invitation will be sent to your email anywhere from 24hrs later to a week later, depending on the amount of people in the automated queue.

After the invitation, you are able to set up your account like any other social media account. Pick a username, pseuds (name), description and bio. You can have a profile picture as well.

How do I navigate the site?

There are few ways to do so efficiently, but there's countless of ways you can experiment with to find which is more comfortable.

1st option: As the website loads, you can go to the 'Fandoms' tag.

Then, after clicking on it, this column appears. Through there, you can pick which media your fandom is from and from there, browse the huge list of different fandoms until you spot your own.

The list is in alphabetical order, so if your fandom begins with an "C", it shouldn't be too far down.

2nd option: At the top right, under your profile, and the options 'Post' and 'Log Out' should be a white oval search bar.

(im using my own account for demonstration)

When searching, there are many ways to work around it.

Personally, I press search as it is. It will lead you to a page where all the fanworks of the site are listed. (i believe its easiest, but always feel free to experiment)

From there, you press the 'Edit Your Search' button, located near the top right.

It will then lead you to a page with multiple fields.

Don't panic when you see all the fields. Only half those are of interest when you want to browse works for a fandom.

The most important ones are those under the Field name 'Work Tags'

Whatever you select under this field will be included in the works the site presents you with.

What are the work tags? What do they do?

Lets go through the options.

Fandom(s): when typing on this option, multiple fandom names will autofill in a list under the white space. If your fandom shows up, you can just click on it.

example:

From there, you can select the fandom you want to see works from. If your fandom doesn't show up, it can mean one of two things:

-there are no works for it

-it isn't popular enough to be picked up by the algorithm

After selecting one fandom, you can select another fandom, or more, to see works that are crossovers over universes.

Ratings: Ratings are selected by author. It defines the level of maturity it has in the work

- General audiences is the tag you want to use when nothing bad happens in the work. No swearing, no sexual activities, no violence or gore. It wont contain scenes that minors are not allowed to see.

- Teen and up audiences is the tag used for most works on the site. It is what would be used when you have mentions of/vague sexual content or violence. Normally, the most extreme stuff on there is excessive swearing, heavy angst and hurt/comfort with no excessive details

- Mature is the tag that is for 18+. It is mostly filled with one of following : Violence, Sexual Content, Ab*se, R@pe, Death and SH.

Reader descretion is advised by looking at the additional tags the author has provided, especially for those with triggers.

- Explicit is like Mature, but contains more graphic content. Works rated explicit mostly fall under the 'Graphic depictions of sexual content', 'Graphic depictions of Violence and Gore' or 'Graphic depictions of Ab*se, R@pe, or Self H*rm

Reader descretion is advised, stronger than mature, since it can be much more triggering. The works are scarily detailed sometimes.

- Not rated: the author has not given this work a rating because none of the other ratings fit the work. Pay special attention to the tags.

Warnings: Also known as Archive warnings by older users. The trigger warnings of Ao3. There are 6 archive warnings:

-Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings: The author didn't use the warnings, either because none of them fit the work's theme and warnings, or to avoid spoiling the story. Pay attention to the tags for any warnings.

-Graphic Depictions Of Violence: It is pretty self explanatory. Can contain any sort of violence, from wars, to simple fights, to ab*se of any kind. Can and often contain death. The type of violence is in the tags.

-Major Character Death: A main character in the story will die in this work. Pay attention to the tags always. The name of the character will be mentioned, as well as the way they die.

-No Archive Warnings Apply: None of the warnings apply. It is most times a perfectly safe work. Check the tags to make sure though!

-R@pe/Non-Con: The work contains non-consensual activities. Ranges from non-consensua sex to non-consensual use and ab*se of substances. Very close attention to the tags!

-Underage: The main character(s) in this work are underage/minors. This is normally tagged along sexual content so be aware and pay close attention to the tags!

Categories: This regards the relationships in the work:

- M/M, or better known as mlm or a relationship between two non-woment (men mostly, can include characters under the non-binary umbrella)

- M/F, a heterosexual relationship (is inclusive of trans characters too!)

- F/F, or wlw, or a relationship between two non-men (women mostly, can include characters under the non-binary umbrella)

- Gen, no sexual or romantic relationships are in this work, or if there are any, they arent of main focus.

- Multi: Polyamorous relationships, or multiple relationships are included in this work (this is also where threesomes+ are tagged in sometimes)

- Other relationships: One of the two people in the relationship is non-human (mostly), or the relationships are platonic/family.

Characters: The characters you want to be included in the story. This works just like the 'Fandom' filter, so the same things apply. You can tag as many characters as desirable.

Relationships: The relationships that you want present in the work. This includes both major and minor relationships. It can also include ended relationships (tagged Past x/y) and implied/referenced relationships. This works just like the Characters and Fandom filter.

Additional Tags: These are things the author has included to give potential readers an insight to the story. 'Angst', 'Fluff' and 'Smut' are additional tags. Works like the Relationships filter, so all same applies.

Is there anything I have to avoid/ I should avoid?

There is this very infamous tag, 'Dead Dove: Do not eat.' This tag is a warining to readers that the things in the work are really messed up, and can include anything illegal in it. PAY VERY CLOSE ATTENTION TO THE REST OF THE TAGS IF YOU STILL ARE INTERESTED.

How else can I filter works?

You can choose how they are:

sorted (Titles, Authors, Hits, Kudos, Comments, Bookmarks, and Best Match)

the word count (from 1 word to millions)

the language (most are on there)

the amount of chapters

if the work is complete of not

when it last updated/when was posted

and if there are crossovers.

These are all options that author has to include, and therefore you can sort freely. Most are bulletin options you can click on.

What if I want to find a specific work?

If you happen to know one of these: Author, Title, Fandom or Rating, you will find it. If you were reccomended one, it's better to ask for the author or the title, to make looking for it easier.

Can I find a specific author/ user?

People search is for finding users on the site

Bookmark search helps you look through other people's public bookmarks. Not really used.

Tag search finds works that include this specific tag you searched. Also not used a lot.

People can see my bookmarks?

When bookmarking a work, you are able to do a lot.

if you do not want your bookmarks to be visible to the public, make sure to check off the Private bookmark box at the bottom left.

Common terms thrown around by Ao3 users:

-tags: the additional tags of the work

-kudos: liking a story

-bookmarks: saving/saved stories. makes it easy to revist. you can see your bookmarks from your profile

-hits: the amount of people that have clicked on a story. Isn't necessary they liked it, but they did click on it.

And those are the basics! If you had to take one thing only, its ALWAYS READ TAGS

I hope this helped the clueless souls even a bit :)

Im open to reply to any other questions, and you can send me them in my asks, messages or comments of this post

#sofi's advice #navigating ao3 #help #advice #ao3

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starberry-cupcake · 5 years

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It’s the end of Aro Week and I decided to throw caution to the wind and talk about something that can potentially be a polarizing topic. I’m putting it on read-more not only because of length but also because in 2020 this blog turns 10 years of age and I’ve learned to leave a window open for retreat when it comes to Opinions, so I don’t know how long I’ll dare to have this up.

This is going to be about the aroace experience, fandom, ships, representation, fanservice, amatonormativity, allosexual normativity and transformative fanwork.

So, basically, a minefield, so tread with care.

Since the dawn of fandom time, there has been an aspect of it that is known (nowadays) as transformative. There are studies, dissertations and essays about this, and most if not all agree on the fact that the portion of fandom that is transformative tends to belong to the less represented portion of it in the media they consume.

It’s mostly people whose identities are rarely represented those who tend to transform, making a space in their favorite pieces of media for themselves and others. That has, in tow, created a scene in which authors and content creators are born within fandom and get exposed to these types of content and reproduce them as well.

The cornerstone of transformative fandom, to the point of being one of the main organizational elements in fandom-driven platforms, are ships. And when someone mentions the word “ship”, it most often comes with the added non-said descriptive of “romantic” and “sexual” attached to it.

Now, like I said, a lot of those who are involved in transformative fandom tend to go for less represented types of identities, and heteronormativity tends to be questioned often. Sometimes, it is legitimately for representation purposes, sometimes it’s for objectifying reasons.

On the other hand, in the media-creating sphere, there is a thing known as “baiting”. This word is used when pieces of media hint towards non het relationships that end up not coming to fruition.

This issue has reached paragons of shamelessness with creators using fandom for their own purposes, like making a series win an award, getting renewed or gathering numbers in cons, to then turn against the same portion of fandom by banning transformative fandom from cons, meet and greets and having actors and crew members publicly shame fanfiction or fanart. It became serious shit.

This, in tow, brought another problem. Baiting (and what used to be considered “queer-coding”) started becoming an immediate red flag for people, a warning to whether getting engaged or not with a piece of media.

In the mostly legitimate pitchfork and torches march against baiting, canonically aroace characters were caught in the fire, and queerplatonic relationships suffered the price of not fitting in the amatonormative and allosexual normative space fandom created.

It’s a standard for fandom that one of the most necessary reasons for transformative work, for fanfiction mostly, is to make characters confess the love they never did confess on screen/page and, most often than not, fuck each other senseless as a sort of “necessary guarantee of their bond”. Consummation, if you will.

Statistically speaking, explicit fics tend to be much more popular than non explicit ones and romantic relationships are what move the main search engines of fanfic platforms.

Headcanon-wise, anyone can do what they want. If a character is interpreted one way or another, that’s not for anyone to police.

With aroace characters, though, it’s a bit tricky, because it’s incredibly rare the amount of times a character is explicitly in the spectrum, and any evidence you can gather, which isn’t outright hearing it, is a lack of something.

A lack that fandom interprets in another way.

You can have a character be sexually attracted and romantically attracted to another and have that be enough for an audience to understand their orientation, to an extent, but an aroace character seems to have to explicitly state it because the lack of romance or sex in their narratives will be interpreted by fandom as “incomplete”.

It’s more frequent for fandom to interpret a character who is not in a romantic or sexual relationship as “lacking” it and “fix” it in fic than for it to be headcanoned as aroace.

An adjacent issue happens with this and the old notion of “queer-coding”. Audiences tend to sometimes interpret that lack as the incapacity for a media creator to explicitly state that the character is homosexual.

The unintended consequence of years of coding, baiting and censorship of non het relationships in media was the invisibilization of relationships canonically in the aroace spectrum.

For example, the first reaction to Elsa from Frozen not having a romantic relationship in the movie was that she was an amatonormative and allosexual lesbian rather than somewhere in the aroace spectrum. Not that there aren’t a myriad of overlaying possibilities between the two things, but you get my point.

The lacking, the incompleteness that fandom most often sees in characters is filled in, most often than not, with gay romantic and sexual relationships, as a result of the years of queer-coding in media. You know, the good ol’ “if she doesn’t have a boyfriend, she must be a lesbian” stance. Fandom is, sometimes, like a family dinner with a 60+ year old uncle.

This is a problem because it creates, within fandom, instances of tug of war between two under-represented factions who both deserve the due representation and which sometimes, very often, overlay in the same people, who fall in both spectrums. It creates arguments and fights for one or other character between the two, as if they were mutually exclusive at all times.

I recently came across different levels of discourse and comments on two pieces of media for this reason, in two different sides.

One concerned Mackenzi Lee’s A Lady’s Guide To Petticoats & Piracy, in which the lead is aroace and there is a girl who is romantically attracted to her and there is a hint of a potential qp relationship. After reading it I found in some review spaces opinions that considered the author hadn’t “gone all the way” with it, as if it was “cop out” for a potential lesbian romance, taking into account that the first volume of the series was centered on an mlm relationship, which gave people certain expectations.

The opposite happened in the webcomic Go Get A Roomie, in which a female lead character who seemed to be aroace for years ended up in a romantic and sexual relationship with the protagonist and there isn’t so far much of a descriptive of where her identity lied to begin with, but with some meaningful conversations that seemed to imply the spectrum after having suffered trauma. And this can be perceived as a sort of “deception” and to the problematic notion of aroace-ness as a “treatable phase”.

Both stories are valid. Both roads towards self-discovery are valid. There isn’t an immediate denial of the spectrum for one or other possibility and both narratives are experiences that happen to people, even maybe the same people at different times in their lives.

But the two happen to include female relationships and boy are those underrepresented. Like I said, it isn’t that both things can’t overlay in a myriad of places, Lillian could be a demisexual demiromantic, for all I know, Sim could be homoromantic and asexual, we don’t know the specifics.

It’s likely and valid to have a gut reaction when you think you’re being represented and then you’re not entirely. And that’s understandable. But it’s a pity that we have tugs of war for scraps of representation.

So, on the one hand, with headcanons, we tend to get fandom fights, most often than not between underrepresented identities, because we’re fighting for the little there is, when in reality we should be uplifting each other...but anyway, moving on.

That’s all in the realm of interpretation, up until the moment the author makes the characters explicitly make choices and take action. That’s someone having a headcanon because of things the piece of media was doing and then having it proven right or wrong, or never having it proved at all.

The other thing, where it gets nasty, is when fandom “fixes” canonically aroace characters. This is also incredibly frequent, most often than not with mlm ships, or what fandom considers mlm ships.

One of the nastiest last year was the Good Omens debacle.

Neil stated that Aziraphale and Crowley weren’t “homosexual men” because they weren’t “men” and they weren’t sexual beings (the whole “making an effort” thing that explicit fic writers like to latch onto). Neil also said they love each other, however that wants to be interpreted, opening it up enough for it to be platonic or romantic or anything you want.

Fic writers have written more GO fics in the last year than ever probably, because of the show, and they’ve experimented with a lot of places of the spectrum. I’m not here to judge anyone because a GO fic was my favorite ace explicit fic I’ve read, so interpretations can be fascinating, I’m all here for them.

The problem arose when people (mostly cis het women) on social media (mostly twitter) started calling Neil a homophobe for not making them pretty much fuck on screen or explicitly state that they were fucking offscreen in canon.

That’s where we need to draw a line and reevaluate our life choices.

I can’t count the amount of posts, tweets and reactions I saw rejecting the possibility of Aziraphale and Crowley not being a) cis men and b) allosexual. The two things created a gutted reaction, to the point that you have to consider the nature and intended result of those comments and, in that case, who’s being an intolerant asshole.

There was a point in time in which fake woke rep discourse became the excuse for people to demand fanservice from creators, especially in the cis het women + mlm media overlay, and this is a problem. We need to separate the discourses, we need to figure out why we’re here and what we’re demanding.

Another similar example I saw recently, yet less overwhelming, was with Banana Fish and the queerplatonic relationship between Ash and Eiji in canon.

I came into BF later than most, but when I read the epilogue manga I found one of the earliest descriptions of a qp relationship I’ve seen, and there were a lot of interesting comments made by the author and other people interviewing her about why sex was never a part of their dynamic and how the bond they had was more of soulmates than romantic lovers and why it was meaningful all the same.

Still, even if the author doesn’t, Banana Fish is considered among the key “BL” animated series of the last few years, alongside stuff like Doukyuusei, Yuri On Ice, Given, etc. And fandom likes to “fix” that “lack of” situation often, apparently.

This case isn’t as feral as GO but it is, however, deceptive. Coming into BF I never would have guessed their relationship was to be qp because fandom let me believe it wasn’t.

And, in this case, the author explicitly stated that this was her intention, this was the story she wanted to tell, it wasn’t her adjusting to censorship or having to code her characters, it was, at heart, what we now can consider a qp relationship.

And, in all of these cases, in which there are aroace characters or relationships involved, or at least somewhere in the aro spectrum or the ace spectrum or both, there’s one main issue behind it: the lack of belief that relationships that aren’t romantic and sexual can be crucial.

That they can be storytelling worthy.

In media-creating and in fanwork-creating, it seems to be the norm to have an endgame romance, or at least for romance to be a key part of your content. It’s the expected box to tick for a fulfilling story, it seems, and the lack of it is the “problem” fandom likes to “fix” the most.

This is also mirrored in the platforms we use. There is a lack of possibility to tag qp relationships as something separated in ao3: the / is for romantic/sexual relationships and the & is for all-encompassing platonic relationships (described by the guidelines as family, teammates, friends, etc.). In order to write a qp relationship you have to tag it & as per guidelines but you have to add another descriptor because you’re not writing family or teammates, and in the case of fandom-polarizing ships, it can be a problem.

And all of this influences us as creators, to the point that it’s easier to write something we’ve never experienced, like romantic attraction, than it is to write without it, because we’ve heard the romantic stories all the time, we’ve grown up reading them, and we’ve learned that no kudos will come to your fic if you don’t have them in there, because it’s that / what’s gonna move the search engines towards your stuff.

Maybe, hopefully, with time and more media around us, we’ll learn different ways of exploring transformative fanwork. Maybe while knowing ourselves and others, we’ll start believing that a lack of romantic relationships doesn’t necessarily mean someone was “too much of a coward to not make these two explicitly x or y”.

Maybe we’ll learn to coexist because, after all, some of these things coexist within our own spectrums sometimes, and it’d be nice to see the capacity for us to not fight for the scraps of rep that media throws at us but be able to understand each other and ourselves enough to create the media that we need.

#long post when expanded #Opinions #aro awareness week #i'm not gonna tag the examples I'm already risking to much by mentioning them in the post #i don't know how long this will be up tbqh

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eirian-houpe · 4 years

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Scattered - Chapter 7

Fandom: Once Upon a Time (TV)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Relationships: Belle/Rumplestiltskin | Mr. Gold

Characters: Belle (Once Upon a Time), Rumplestiltskin | Mr. Gold, Gaston (Once Upon a Time), Maurice | Moe French, Mad Hatter | Jefferson, Evil Queen | Regina Mills, Alex (OC)

Additional Tags: AU, Curse gone wrong, Rape/Non-con Elements, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Cruelty, Abuse, Triggers, Eventual Smut, Romance, Character Death, Gaston is evil, Graphic depictions of violence - Freeform

Summary: Casting a spell, any spell - at least the ones that involve more than just the wave of a hand, or worse, the wave of an irritating fairy’s wand - takes time, and patience, and the right ingredients, and… just like any recipe, if you get it wrong, it doesn’t mean the cake won’t cook, rather then will, just with unexpected or unintended outcomes. All of Rumplestiltskin’s careful planning and manipulation, all of his hopes and dreams turn to dust; ashes in his bitter heart in the blink of an eye… in the fall of an equine heart. Belle exchanges one terrible prison for another, and it’s one she is desperate to escape, and though Rumple’s fate as The Savior was severed from him centuries ago, sometimes fate itself has a way of finding an alternate route home.

Read on AO3

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6]

Chapter 7 - ...Always Comes With A Price

Jefferson refused to move as Regina tried to stare him down. They’d been here before… almost this same, precise showdown, and with the same leverage. Grace.

The last time hadn’t ended well, in fact it was instrumental in his separation from Grace now and he wasn’t about to repeat his own stupid mistakes, not where Regina was concerned.

“No,” he said, sounding almost convincing. So for good measure he added, “Absolutely not.”

Regina simply stared at him, her eyes hard, her gaze calculating and he could almost read the formulation of further threats that were - he had no doubt of it - going through her head at that moment. He fidgeted, tugging at his jacket, and just as he felt himself starting to falter, the thought of his daughter - lost to him in this cursed world - almost shattering his resolve, he had a realization, and snapped, “Besides, it’s moot, and you know it. There’s no magic in this world, ergo, my hat won’t work.” He straightened up then, feeling a flush of satisfaction at Regina’s expression of distaste, so added, with no small amount of satisfaction, “Face it, your majesty, you’re screwed.”

The expression of distaste turned to one of amusement, and then smugness as she began to tsk softly, and came out from behind the desk, waving her finger at him like a ticking metronome.

“Oh, ye of little faith, Jefferson,” she said. “Did you honestly think I would bring myself to a world such as this one, without some kind of… contingency plan?”

Jefferson groaned. He might have known. He should have known, but an act of desperation had him blurt out, “If you use all your magic to power the hat, what will you have left to summon him even if I can get you the dagger?” He followed her as she paced across the room and he continued. “You know even that can’t work across realms.”

“Unless there’s already an open portal - yes, yes, I know.” She sounded bored.

“You prepared for something like this, didn’t you?” he said, accusing and incredulous.

“Oh, p-lease,” she scoffed, “you think I’d ever trust that twisted little imp?”

“So what happens now?” Belle asked as she finally pulled away from his embrace. She felt somehow cold without his arms around her, in spite of the still too recent assault. She felt safe in his arms.

“What happens now,” he said, his voice almost a strange kind of sing-song tone, “is that you stay here, under my protection, until you’re healed - until you’re well.”

“But,” she began, not even sure how to formulate what she was even trying to ask. “But… my people…? My father!” her stomach twisted into knots. When her father heard that she was missing, it could kill him… if Gaston even bothered to tell him, though she thought Gaston might instead tell a storybook full of lies that would be just as hurtful. She truly feared for her father in his condition.

“Belle…” Rascende tried to interrupt, but she wouldn’t let him; couldn’t.

“My father is sick. Very sick,” she said, reaching out to grasp one of his hands in near desperation. “If he hears of this, of anything, it could steal away his will to get well again; to live.” She felt her hands tremble against the warmth of Rascende’s. “Without my father, our people will suffer. Gaston will—”

“You leave him to me,” Rascende growled, then he blinked and softened the hard expression that had entered his eyes at the mention of Gaston’s name. He shifted his grasp around her fingers then until he was holding her hand and she no longer desperately clutching at his. “Just rest, my Belle,” he said gently, “And leave everything else to me. I promise I will take care of your father, and see to it that Gaston can’t hurt anyone any more.”

She did not miss the way he called her his, but it soothed her, comforted the painful tension coiling in her so that she focused on his words, his promise to her and something in her trusted him more deeply than she had ever trusted another in her life. She wanted to talk to him, to tell him everything and surrender to him and his promise of aid.

“Chanctonbury,” she said, the hated name a breath on her lips. “He did this… did something so that my father would exhaust the coffers and—”

She jumped as Rascende’s soft finger touched just lightly on her lip and she silenced at once, stilled, and was uncertain whether it had been some kind of magic on his part to make her stop speaking, stop panicking and take several deep breaths, one after another.

“I have promised you,” he said quietly, “have I not, that I will take care of your father and make this little… problem… you have with the young lord Chanctonbury and his father go away…?” his voice took on a the same, and yet somehow exaggerated sing song tone as before. “And in return, all I ask is that you rest, and allow yourself to get well again.” He tipped his head to one side, to regard her, his warm brown eyes rippling with a strange, light, amber-gold for just a moment as he finished, “Do we have a deal?”

Another time… or a dream; a nightmare. Monsters, ogres, her people in danger and a strange little man offering help… for a price.

”What I want is something a bit more special.” His fingers curled in a gesture she couldn’t identify, before his hand disappeared behind her father’s form for a moment. “My price…” she saw him then, pointing over her father’s shoulder, “is her.”

Her head spun, she felt caught in a whirlwind, between two worlds with no foot in either where she belonged or where she should be, and in some unspoken way she knew, she knew, that neither one of them was here. She felt her eyes begin to roll and her eyelids flutter, the dislocation causing nausea to bite hard.

“Belle…?” strong hands - his hands - closed around her upper arms. “Belle what’s wrong?”

The touch grounded her. Her mind began to clear in spite of the lingering feeling of faintness, and before the words could slip away she whispered softly, “The deal… is struck.”

“Belle look at me!” he commanded, though his voice was somehow still gentle, and not without hope. “Look at me. Hold on to it… remember…”

Desperation crept in too, though he tried not to allow it. He wanted her to remember, needed her to, then he could protect her properly, without this transparent charade. Why had Regina done this… more to the point how?

What if it wasn’t Regina?

Impossible! he scoffed mentally, pushing the thought away in the face of the struggle he saw on Belle’s face, as though she were trying, and trying hard to obey his command, to hold tight to the ledge but with fingers that were slipping. If only he could catch her. Who could possibly be strong enough to disrupt the casting of the dark curse… Impossible!

“I… I don… I can’t…” Belle’s voice, colored with deep confusion pulled him out of his almost frightened musings.

“Look at me, Belle,” he said again, “Tell me… what did you see? What did you remember?”

Her eyes were beginning to lose that slightly glazed, faraway expression and he cursed inwardly, almost begging for more time. If only he could get her to speak of it, to keep it.

“R… Rumple…” she closed her eyes, her face a frown as she spoke his name, “…stiltskin…?”

“Yes,” he breathed and gripped her more tightly, “Yes, it’s me. I’m here. Forever, remember?”

“Yeah, I…” she murmured even more faintly.

He tried so hard to somehow keep a hold of her; of her mind, of her memory, even as the shield flared and wavered around them… holding, though inside the cottage, the pots rattled on the hearth. He looked that way, for barely a second.

“Master Rascende…” Belle pulled away from his grasp on one side to be able to run a hand over her face. His heart lurched then sank, constricting in his chest as if the bile rising in his throat were a hand that grasped it. “…forgive me,” she continued, “I don’t know what came over me.”

“You’ve… been through a lot,” he told her, managing to keep his voice surprisingly steady, even through his own pain, “Perhaps you just need to rest a little more.”

She offered him a slightly bemused, slightly embarrassed smile. “I’m sure you’re right,” she whispered. “But you… you’ll still… you’ll help…?”

“Of course I will,” he gave her a sorrowing smile. “Just as soon as morning comes, I’ll go to Amberley hall and see what’s to be done… beginning with your father.”

She reached out and clutched at his arm as she lay down, and he carefully covered her again with the blanket. “Thank you, Rascende. Truly.”

His lips tightened from a smile into a part of the serious expression that overtook his face. “Think nothing of it,” he said, gently pushing with magic drawn from the growing things of the forest, and the natural turning of the seasons, the Land, to nudge her toward sleep. “I’ll get to the bottom of this.”

She acquiesced quickly, and he freed himself from her gentle grasp to stalk toward the fireplace, each step changed him from the gentle man he had been at her side to the tightly coiled spring of resentment, rage and pain. He reached inside of his jacket and closed his hand around the item he mentally summoned to the hidden pocket within. The familiar weight of the handle a comfort, a shelter to him in times such as these. He needed greater power, and this could give it to him immediately; without the need to wait on his full attunement with the natural magic of this world. It would serve him greatly - as greatly as he had already, always, and still served it.

“I’ll get to the bottom of all of it,” he promised through clenched teeth, the breath of his uttered words misting the blade of the Dark One Dagger as he spoke.

#rumbelle #au #curse gone wrong #noncon warning #abuse #romance #eventual smut #character death #graphic violence #gaston is evil #i will always write jefferson

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dropintomanga · 6 years

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Faith Is Restored - An Interview With “Anime For Humanity”

Ever since I started this blog, I thought to myself whether I or someone else can start up a mental health organization that helps people using anime. I had some optimism at first, but grew jaded after seeing people’s impressions of anime and how anime was treated under the geek hierarchy over the years. Yet I found out that someone or should I say, a group of fans is doing what I envisioned in my head and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect

While I was reading up on the sudden “mental health” question that popped up in an “anime census”, I found out about an organization that anime fans should support when it came to mental health discussion. That organization is known as Anime For Humanity. They are based in Los Angeles and have been traveling throughout California at various conventions since starting in 2017.

I went to their site immediately and I was amazed that AFH are a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization dedicated to using a medium that many fans love to promote mental health awareness. So I decided to get an interview with AFH and their outreach manager, Ruby, got back to me. Here’s what she had to say on Anime For Humanity, their beginnings, a couple of their projects, the hashtag movement they started, and more.

Q: How did Anime for Humanity get started? What made you see that anime was inspiring for anyone with mental illness?

Ruby: Before Anime For Humanity (AFH) started, we were an anime club with a passion for anime and community. We volunteered with local charities and hosted events that people enjoyed. Then we realized there were specific ways anime could have an impact and make a difference in people’s lives.

When we first thought about the causes Anime For Humanity should tackle, we took a moment to reflect on what anime brought and changed in our personal lives. We found out that most of us suffered through depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicidal thoughts. Only a few us did get professional help and others didn’t because of the so-called “stigma."

Q: What professional backgrounds do you have in mental health?

Ruby: Since AFH started as an anime club, we all came from different backgrounds, including artists, teachers, computer scientists and therapy counselors.

We do close work with other LPCCs (licensed professional clinical counselors) and LMFTs (licensed marriage and family therapists) that volunteer to host panels, speak at events and run support groups.

As a member of the Anime For Humanity Clinical Advisory Board, it is very important for AFH to work with therapists and counselors who understand the fandom and use it as to a tool to help people find healing and recovery.

Q: Clinical Advisory Board?

Ruby: The Clinical Advisory Board is an initiative made by Anime For Humanity. It is still under the work and part of the Anime Therapy Project. Since we attend a bunch of cons, a lot of licensed therapists stop by our booth and ask us to be involved in what we do. We call them the "Anime Therapists." :)

The purpose of the Clinical Advisory Board is to discuss scientific research done on anime and help polish Anime For Humanity’s upcoming projects/programs. We also have been working on building a "find an anime therapist near you" (which is similar to our “Find Healing” resources, but with a twist) where the anime/geek community can find a therapist near them who understands the fandom and maybe uses it as a tool for therapy.

So far, the project is still on alpha mode and local to LA. We are hopeful it will expand to other cities, states and around the world.

Q: With anime consumption almost completely online and anime conventions sometimes being the only spot to get fans together, how did you come up with ideas to get fans to come to your programs offline?

Ruby: Here in SoCal (Southern California), it happens that there is a convention every month where we get to be in touch with the attendees and tell them about what we do.

We are very grateful for all the convention organizers in our area because not only does the anime scene keep growing, but we also get to hand out local resources for people to get professional help.

Q: Describe what a typical workshop/support group session from Anime for Humanity is like.

The AFH support group is part of the Anime Therapy program, which is still under the works.

Q: What challenges came along the way as Anime for Humanity began to grow?

Ruby: One of the challenges Anime For Humanity faced when we first started was we weren't able to collaborate with other organizations because there wasn't much acceptance and support towards anime when discussing our mission and purpose.

Q: What did it take to get some of those who were skeptical onto your side? How did you convince them? I always felt anime has better acceptance in a place like California due to a large Asian population, Hollywood celebrities loving it, and a vibrant arts scene.

Ruby: At first, we couldn't convince them due to what they have been told about anime (ie. anime containing violent and sexual content) - things that didn't go with their mission and values.

But once we showed them how conventions were growing (especially the growth of Anime Expo) and how anime presents themes such as kindness, courage, and friendship. We also told them our story of how anime gave us a purpose to make a change in our community. That gave a spark to start the conversation and change their minds about anime. And yes! You’re right about anime being more accepted in California. As I mentioned earlier, there is more than one convention happening each month here in California, where people celebrate their fandom (comics, anime, cosplay, etc) Seeing cosplayers on the train/metro, cons popping up everywhere; that made it easy to promote Anime For Humanity!

Q: I liked how you involve gamers of all kinds to support Anime for Humanity via the "Play Anime Project." In your opinion, what is it about gamers that make them the most charitable people out there?

Ruby: Gamers are a great community. They are passionate and empathetic. Especially when gaming with a purpose comes to play. Everyone would love to do what they are passionate about and help others at the same time.

The "Play Anime Project" is about taking and promoting new and fun anime games to non-anime conventions and start the conversation about the stigma of mental health with attendees.

Q: I found out about a program you had to combat illiteracy called “Take a Manga, Return a Manga Project." Given that manga literacy and comprehension can translate well into reading non-visual material, how did the program work and which series were the most helpful for fans struggling to read?

Ruby: “Take a Manga, Return a Manga” is a unique and exciting program we launched when we first started Anime For Humanity. Here are the 3 reasons why:

1. We wanted to promote anime/manga to a community who aren't familiar with either. Because as mentioned earlier, reaching out to that community was/is still one of the challenges we are facing.

2. We all have a bunch of manga collecting dust in our shelves. We thought how can we put those manga into use and make a space where values like sharing, friendship, and community are built in the anime community.

When we took the AFH library to a couple of conventions, we would invite the attendees to build one in their community, college, high school, etc. to bring those values and show the rest what anime is about.

3. Like you mentioned in your question, manga literacy and comprehension can\translate well into reading non-visual materials.

We have a special box for people to donate manga that will be taken to kids in orphanages as a way to fight illiteracy. Since the donated books were random, we do pick and choose the appropriate ones that will be given to the kids while the rest go back to the library.

Q: I wanted to ask about your thoughts about the recent Flying Colors Foundation situation where the now-defunct organization asked a question regarding users' mental health. There was a good amount of criticism towards FCF about that particular question. What concerns did you have over how they presented it?

Ruby: We believe the question about mental health could have been worded better or not have been asked at all. The survey was to show Japanese animation studios what most Westerners think and want in an anime, and not about personal mental health issues which are generally unrelated to their survey.

Q: I love the #SavedbyAnime hashtag you started, but there are times, as you and I know, where anime consumption can be harmful to someone. We've seen toxic situations involving fandom. How do you tell someone who may be letting anime or anime fandom take over their daily life that it's a good time to step back?

Ruby: “Too much of a good thing is good for nothing.” Moderation is always the key. Over-consumption of anything such as food, exercise, entertainment, and also medicine can be harmful. Finding balance in our lives is so important, yet it is so hard.

This is one of the complex questions that we face at conventions most of the time, since we have encountered many people saying “If it wasn’t for over-consuming anime, I'm not sure if I would be here right now.”

We tend not to judge or give advice to people, but paradoxically, our first approach is to invite people to watch an anime that would speak to their situation in life (Naruto, Welcome to the N.H.K, etc. for example).

Then we follow up with them to ultimately help them understand what they are going through and hopefully get professional help. We believe all the struggles anime characters go through is to share with us their experiences that we can learn from and use it in our daily lives.

This is where we start the conversation and and educate people about the hashtag #SavedByAnime which is about how to use anime to find balance, growth and purpose in life.

Q: I noticed that there's an upcoming program called "Anime Therapy" on the front page of your site, which looks like screenings with some conversations afterwards, I believe? Can you talk more about it?

Ruby: We will keep you updated once it's ready for launch.

Q: Given that mental illness is becoming a popular topic in graphic novels and manga like “My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness” have hit mainstream success, what would like to see going forward in terms of anime covering portrayals of characters with mental illness?

Ruby: We would love to see more of the kinds of anime that cover characters with mental illness. For example, Welcome to the N.H.K depicted the struggles of a person who was suffering from mental illness. We also hope to see anime touch on the subject of getting professional help when in crisis.

This interview has been edited for clarity.

You can visit Anime For Humanity at http://www.animeforhumanity.org.

#Anime for Humanity #anime #manga #mental health #otaku fandom #therapy #psychology #interviews #non-profit organization #mental health organizations

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pan-xichen · 7 years

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Why I don't ship k/ance: revealed

(notice how I censored the ship name specifically to avoid people coming after me)

So it's no secret that k/ance is the most popular ship in this fandom. I don't see a ton of it because I mostly follow people who post other ships and non-shippy content but I know it's the biggest ship based on the ao3 tag size alone (I was curious one day okay). There's just this massive amount of people who love the ship and there's nothing wrong with that. I think it's great that people can make and enjoy content made by others about their ships. I just have never been interested in k/ance myself. It's not that I've been asked this or anything, I just felt like giving my reasons for not liking it. So here it is, my humble opinion on the ship and why I don't particularly like it (under a cut because this turned into a long ass post whoops):

(warning: this post is opinionated and analyzes the relationship between Keith and Lance from the perspective of someone who does not like the ship at all; please don’t take any of this as offensive if you do like k/ance, I don’t mean to anger anyone)

It just... doesn't make sense to me. It's also the... unsavoury crowd the ship attracts for some reason, but if I liked it or had reasons to like it chances are I'd probably ignore them. There are some cool people who ship k/ance and I love all of them, even if I'm not interested in their ship.

I've always been someone who prefers when two characters in a ship actually get along. I'm not saying Keith and Lance hate each other, because they definitely don't. I just don't see them being particularly close to each other yet. Maybe they'll get there, maybe not. I doubt even if they do end up being great friends later on that I'll start to ship them, though.

I've always found it weird that everyone latched onto the two characters who are consistently at each others' throats, (in most of the first season anyway), and deemed them suitable for a ship while simultaneously deciding that the two male characters in the show who have been canonically the closest since the first episode are related in some way. I just... don't get how people can look at Keith and Lance's dynamic, especially early on, and think they're romantically interested in each other. They have their moments where they do get along in the first two seasons but typically it's for the good of the mission and when they're done it's back to not liking each other. I think at most, Keith wants to be Lance's friend, not his rival, but Lance doesn't want to be friends with Keith at all. He prefers his own misconception of who Keith is to finding out the truth for himself, and Keith gets tired of trying to make friends with a brick wall and just accepts that this is his relationship with Lance. That's just how I see it.

When I look at Keith and Lance, I see Lance unnecessarily vilifying Keith out of jealousy. I read and reblogged a post about Lance causing Hunk to have the same misconception about Keith as a person that kinda spiked this one a bit, because... it's true. Keith doesn't even remember Lance's name in the first episode, which might have also sparked part of Lance's perception of him. Keith, however, was also very focused on rescuing Shiro, and had been struggling through mourning for the better part of a year while isolated from contact with others. Of course he's not going to remember Lance-- the only person he's been thinking of has very likely been Shiro.

What Lance is doing, essentially, is projecting his lack of skill as Keith, someone who is obviously more skilled as a pilot than him, "always trying to one-up him". If Keith really was always trying to be better than Lance, he would've remembered him. Hell, we don't even really see him trying to prove he's better than Lance at anything until their nonexistent rivalry gains merit. Lance doesn't want to accept that he wasn't a great pilot (yet) and also accept that Keith was better than him. That's where that comes from.

Part of why I think that is stems from his family. At a panel at a con (I don't know which one) he was "word of god" confirmed to have been from a wealthy family, and was given plenty of attention growing up. Whether that upholds or not remains to be seen but really when you look at the way he treats Keith, it makes sense. It might be more subconscious than conscious, but Keith was an orphan, probably coming from foster care (or just out of nowhere, maybe he was living on his own who knows) and somehow being an incredibly talented pilot, while Lance, someone with a stable, healthy upbringing was struggling and ultimately didn't make the class he wanted to. He blamed Keith, and thus was more than happy to know he'd taken his place after Keith had been expelled.

This is somewhat of an assumption/headcanon of mine, but I also think Lance may have been jealous of Keith's relationship with Shiro, and that it carried over to when Shiro returned after disappearing. We've had tons of hinting at Keith and Shiro being friends before the series too, and Lance states when they discover that Shiro was in the alien ship, "that guy's my hero". He idolizes Shiro, and especially taking his reaction into account when he sees Keith on his way to rescue him, he may have been jealous of Keith having a close relationship with him pre-series, in addition to envying Keith's talent as a pilot.

So we have Lance being envious of Keith, and painting him as this snobby, arrogant guy in his head (I assume Keith was probably rather selective in who he hung out with at the Garrison too which would add to that). That leads to Lance victimizing and convincing himself that Keith always wanted to be better than him, when in reality Keith is just a talented, intelligent and somewhat quiet person. He was probably focused mostly on his studies and not much else, whereas Lance is very extraverted and invested in his friends. Neither of those are bad things, but are certainly polar opposites.

Keith, in contrast, probably also had his own misinterpretation of Lance: someone who cares more about relationships and goofing off than his work. In reality, Lance really wanted to be a good pilot. Maybe he was a little distracted at the Garrison, as we do see him become a great pilot as a paladin, in which this assumption by Keith would make sense. Keith very much strikes me as someone who had to grow up too fast, and Lance as someone who had ample time to come into maturity. The difference between them with their misconceptions seems to be that Keith is a bit more willing to cast his aside, whereas Lance continues to cling to them.

I know a lot of shippers see the first episode of season three as having a k/ance moment, what with Lance putting his hand on Keith’s shoulder and accepting his leadership, but really... it’s not. I see this more as Lance putting his own wants and desires aside for the sake of the mission-- he wanted to be the black paladin, but the lion chose Keith, so he’s reluctantly accepting. That’s what’s happening there. In my opinion, to say that it’s exclusively a k/ance moment takes away from that bit of Lance’s development. Not to mention that honestly, Lance isn’t accepting Keith as his leader, either. He doesn’t respect Keith any more than he did before. What he respects, is the black lion. He respects her decision to choose Keith over him. He does grow to accept Keith as his leader eventually, but just two episodes later we see him actively jabbing at Keith’s (admittedly poor) decisions and leadership. Keith is in mourning, for fuck’s sake. I know Lance isn’t the only one who doesn’t take to Keith’s leadership well, but really, he’s the only one I can remember who actually went at him. Even after they start to kinda get used to Keith leading, when Shiro(?) returns, they naturally look to him for guidance instead. Lance then tells Keith that he’s worried about his own place on the team, and Keith tries to reassure him as best someone who doesn’t closely know the other person can. Again, as well, Lance is worried about himself (which is fine).

If this was a shippy moment he probably would’ve been more concerned for Keith, as he’s the one who’s been unintentionally undermined by his closest friend and everyone has gone back to following Shiro instead. Keith pulls back from the team in season four as a direct result of what happened when Shiro returned; he’s putting everyone else above himself. In Keith’s mind, he sees himself as the extra. Allura is fantastic as a paladin. The red lion hasn’t shut Lance out because she wants Keith back, so he assumes she’s done with him. The team already would rather listen to Shiro than him, so he got the black lion to take Shiro back. The green and yellow lions were never involved in the swap. He can’t help Coran with the castle, so he goes off with the Blade of Marmora. He makes a series of decisions in the first episode of season four that separate him from the team, and then announces that he’s leaving. Lance does... nothing to stop this. (Admittedly Shiro also doesn’t try to stop him, to tell him he’s needed, which also makes me more suspicious as to whether or not this really is our Shiro but that’s not what this post is about.) He doesn’t pull Keith aside and ask if he’s okay, find him when he returns to talk to him (like Allura did). He’s vilified Keith again; sees him as selfish, only interested in what he seemingly wants to do, when in reality Keith truly wants to be reminded that the team needs him and probably to be a paladin again. The complete and total lack of intervention on Lance’s part when Keith is clearly Not Okay in the most recent season also signifies to me that they still have yet to be close enough for them to make sense being romantically involved.

And that’s fine! I’m not saying I look down on the ship or shippers because of it. I just prefer my ships to at least make some canonical sense, and can’t see it happening with k/ance. Like I said at the beginning, maybe they will grow closer together before the series ends-- I’d actually really like to see that happening. I still doubt I’d be interested in shipping it, though.

I do think it’s neat that shippers can make content for themselves and each other to enjoy, even if it isn’t quite canon compliant. The one thing I really hate to see though is edits of intimate scenes between Keith and other characters, or Lance and other characters, with captions of “this is how it happened right?” or “I fixed it”. Like... how much more fucking pretentious can you get? Edits are fine but when you claim they’re canon or that you “fixed” the actual scene, that’s just disrespectful to the creators of the show. The story they want to tell, is how it happened. You can’t “fix” that.

TL;DR - I don’t ship k/ance because when I look at their canon relationship it doesn’t make sense seeing it as romantic. I’m not judging anyone who does, but this is just a long-winded analysis of what I think of them and why I dislike the ship. I know there are some really cool people who ship k/ance and are more realistic about knowing it’s not logically going to be canon (not just based on my analysis but also the showrunners did explicitly state that it won’t) but enjoy their ship nonetheless, and props to them! For me it’s also kind of a combination of the way some people who ship k/ance treat other fans and the staff and their canon dynamic but I can mostly disregard them in terms of why exactly I don’t ship Keith and Lance.

#this got way too long lmao #people probably don't care but *shrug emoji*#this is just my silly opinion #this is of course nothing against people who do ship it by any means #i just can't ship it myself

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fledgesfancies · 4 years

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Top Tropes

Aaaa apparently it’s been a week since I’ve had any kind of activity on here, apologies if anyone was missing me but I am so busy, still working on two fic challenges due at the end of November! And I had my flu jab, and it really knocked me sideways for 3 days (better that than actually getting the flu, if the strength of my immune response is anything to go by!)

Just to keep everyone amused, I thought I’d put together a list of my Top Ten tropes in fanfic/art. The sort of tags which instantly capture my attention and make me curious to read/see more! Most of my own writing tends to fall under one or more of these tropes, it goes without saying. If you feel like playing along, please tag me in your post so I can check out yours! 😘

1. Transformation/inhuman - one or both of the boys are (or are turned into) monsters, animals, dragons, angels, demons, ghosts, aliens, fae, elementals, cosmic entities, androids, spaceships, gender swap, de-aged - you name it, I don't care, I love it! Whether temporary, permanent or always-like-this.

2. Collaring/slavery - rescue and hurt-comfort tropes ftw. Also collaring/claiming/ownership themes. There’s just something about putting one or both of the boys into a collar...

3. Twincest/Selfcest - Sex with identical twins, clones, shapeshifters/doppelgangers, possessing angels or alternate selves from a different timeline or universe (bonus for age difference!) I am hugely greedy for this trope, especially when it concerns Dean and/or Jensen (or Alec, or Priestly...) and I can’t believe I forgot about it and had to ETA this whole list. 🤦‍♀️

4. Diminished capacity - Comatose, delusional, drugged, possessed, trapped in dreams/virtual reality, social/communication or mental health disorder, PTSD, Stockholm Syndrome, abnormal upbringing (OK isn’t that one just canon to SPN?), sensory impairment, brainwashed/programmed, enspelled; any scenario which renders one or both vulnerable and may raise questions of dub-con BUT must involve caring responsibility and not veer into non-con territory between the boys. It's a fine line to walk. Get it wrong and you trigger my biggest squick and condemnation! Underage NOT included (unless it’s de-aging, see above).

5. Extra Inhuman Appendages - Wings - Either the boys have them, or they feature prominently in an adversary or inhuman friend/lover. (We all know angels have wings, but I’m talking about making them a focal point of the story.) It’s more about the wings than actual flight. Especially touching/preening them. Tails - A special mention should go here to Major (Colonel) John Sheppard in the SGA fandom, to whom I gave a tail. I also love Dean’s squirrel tail in @reshipkmn‘s art. Tentacles - not so much as a part of my boys, but used upon them 😏😋 It's also SPN canon that Dean has a tentacle fetish! Now that’s fan service. Horns - I eagerly await a young demon!Sam story in the SPNRB challenge posting next month, the artwork was to die for and he has wings, horns AND a tail! (Throw in little hoofies and that’s it, I’ll be a wreck! 🥰)

6. ABO - any combination, any trope, the only one I'm really not keen on (ironically) is mpreg. I avoided this entire trope (genre?) for years because of mpreg, but when I finally gave in, I fell hard for the entire concept. I’ve nothing against mpreg per se, I just don’t really want to read fic about being pregnant and having kids. Also my predilections are for Wincest, and that raises some difficult issues. Though there’s an exception to every rule, and The Killing Moon by Poisontaster would be mine!

7. Car fic - Specific to the Supernatural fandom, but it’s been my OTF for 15 years now, so. Sex in/with the Impala, Baby POV, Baby turns human, boys' consciousness trapped in Baby... I love Baby! Never. Hurt. Her. >:( (I also love AU stories where Baby is, by necessity, not a car but some other appropriate mode of transport - such as a horse or a spaceship! Maybe don't have sex with Baby as a horse, I'm just saying...)

8. Murder husbands - dark alternates, whether demon/boy king of Hell, serial killers, crime lords or monsters. Can be as dark and depraved as you like, but the boys MUST love and look after one another.

9. Sex pollen/fuck or die/forced mating - scenarios which are forced dub or non-con but not (eventually) unwelcome and help to establish an ongoing relationship. Cheesy but delicious. Especially useful in a pairing where there are more reasons than most to avoid getting together (incest).

10. Bondage and domination - I LOVE these elements of bdsm and this trope would be higher on the list except that I really don’t care for discipline or S&M, except at its mildest. And it is very hard to find fic which doesn’t incorporate them all - or is written so well, with compassion and real understanding (insight), that it doesn’t trigger my innate don’t make my boys hurt each other reflex. All of this applies to consensual bdsm, by the way - if it’s *specified* non-con (with an adversary, or one boy turned dark) then everything can be unleashed! 😈 I’m good with any amount of survivable whump they’re not supposed to enjoy!

That is... quite a list. I realise I may be a bit of an odd duck, but I’m quite harmless and a very nice person, I assure you! 😘

#fandom #tropes #top ten #outing myself #no kink shaming

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meganmazing · 7 years

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An All Phlint Rec List!

One guess which pairing I fell head-first into this time...

Need more time? No problem, I’ll give you a hint. It involves SHEILD’s #1 eye in the sky and his long-suffering, slightly anal-retentive handler. The purple Avenger and the dead-not-dead agent. You know them, and if you don’t already love them, these fics will fix that for you. Sorry in advance for how long this is, but there are so many fics and I have too many feelings.

Some of them even feature Pizza Dog, because we are a blessed fandom.

Most of these are rated Explicit, but not all! I even mention a G-rated fic, and I’m proud of me for branching out my recs. I don’t read non-con/dub-con, and I’m not usually into ABO stuff, so you won’t find any of that here, if it’s a concern. Just in case, read the tags! I also don’t read unhappy endings, becasue I’m not about that life.

Click the bold titles (sometimes the little lines indicating a link aren’t there, but the link still is) and don’t forget to leave kudos/comments on the ones you love, to spread that love to the authors! And as always, there will always be more fics that I love/bookmark/scream about in my bookmarks page on my ao3 account: megamazing

College AU

Launch Your Assault by foxxcub Words: 30k Rating: E

Phil Coulson was more than halfway through his six year plan, and everything was chugging along nicely.

Unfortunately, he hadn’t foreseen a cocky junior Art major waltzing into his life, or his floor.

So this is within the same universe as Bulletproof, a stony College AU fic, but I never read that one. Phlint College AU’s I love, but not so much with stony? I have weirdly subjective preferences when it comes to fics.

However, I will rec this one with my dying breath. It is Phil’s POV, and I have such a soft spot for college age Phil now, thanks to this story. As a college student myself, I felt that everything was really realistic and I believed everything. More than that, I want to give both the boys a hug. They need it after this.

Also, as you’ll see later on in this list, I love the “fuck buddies” trope with hidden feelings that are so not hidden it’s embarrassing. And heartbreaking. As much as I want to hug Phil, I also think he needs a swift kick or seven.

Safety Not Guaranteed by foxxcub words: 4k+ (nearly 5k) Rating: M

Phil was informed of the Sigma Iota tradition of White Elephant two weeks before Christmas break. He’d heard of other chapters on campus having holiday parties and had figured the SI’s did the same.

But he was quickly learning the SI’s didn’t do things quite like other fraternities.

Short, sweet, and funny. Of course this would happen to them, within a group of people where blatant, verbal communication is a practically a foreign notion. I laughed, I sympathetically cringed, and there are sexytimes, too. What’s not to love here, really? (Wade has a great cameo, too, so of course this was going on the list)

I'll Learn To Dance If You Promise Not To Laugh by torakowalski words: 10k+ rating: E

A College AU in which there are long distance relationships, misunderstandings, and no one actually spends any time in college.

The insecurity in this fic kills me in the best way. Clint puts on an act sometimes, acting stronger and suaver than maybe he feels. When your bf is older and cooler and smarter and too good for you, what else can you do? Naturally, that strategy works great until it doesn’t.

Thor, Darcy, and Jane are wonderful and I just want more of them! I would never have pictured them as Phil’s roommates, but it works so well and watching Clint interact with them is great.

Everyone deserves a hug: Clint for being a sweet idiot, Phil for being a well-meaning moron, and the roommate squad for putting up with their shit and making it fun.

(more torakowalski fics in the final section, because I’m in love with their work and need to throw more at you)

Other AU

Kindergarten ‘verse by soniclipstick (veriscence) total words: 38k+ Respective ratings: E, G, and E

Kindergarten teacher Clint Barton has never been in a healthy stable relationship in his life. Hell, mostly he doesn't bother leaving his house unless his best friend drags him out for 'socialising'. He's happy with his life as a hermit; he has a dog, and fifteen sticky tiny humans to teach core skills to. That's more than enough commitment for him

But that's all about to change when the new school year brings along with it some major surprises, such as Phil Coulson, the widowed father of one of his students and owner of the bluest eyes Clint's ever seen.

(summary from the first fic in the series)

I am rec’ing the whole series here, because I want to curl up and live in the world the author created. It has everyone you could think of wanting to see from both general Marvel canon and also Agents of SHIELD. Look, as I’m writing this, I want to go back and re-read the first fic. As the author states in the tags, it’s totally Fraction’s Hawkeye, aka my favorite and the best (soz MCU Clint, you’re cool too, sometimes).

This could have been so stupid. It’s a kindergarten teacher AU, it very easily could have been something I read two paragraphs of and clicked away. But it isn’t. When the author says fluff and angst, they mean it. It hurt my heart and made me giddy by turns. Also, sexytimes. But the feelings! I connected so much with Clint in this, and felt so much for Phil, and the payoff feels so earned by the time it happens.

The supporting cast is phenomenal, and it may be my favorite of this whole list, which is saying a lot because I love them all. Even the smaller cameos were hilarious and made me smile.

EVEN IF YOU READ NO OTHER FIC ON THIS LIST, READ THIS SERIES.

Pre-Avengers (mostly)

Slow and Soft by onthewaters Words: 23k Rating: E

When Coulson adds Barton to his team, he expects smartassery. Except there isn't any...

This is it. This is the story I was looking for and craving without even knowing it. That may make zero sense, but I don’t know how else to put it. The writing and the storytelling here are on another level, and I mean that in the best possible way. It shows them getting together - including the beginning of the incredible friendship between the trio (Nat, Clint, and Phil) and Nat and Clint's bond - as well as the most believable/subtle pinning I’ve read in awhile.

Phil's characterization is the best in this one. It’s his POV, and his personality just shines. This is one of the ones I really treasure, and I won’t apologize for how extra I am about it.

Operation Snapdragon by Laura Kaye (laurakaye) words: 10k+ rating: E

They’d decided to call it Operation Snapdragon, Jasper had explained, because snapdragons meant “deception” in the language of flowers.

It would be more accurate to call it Operation Rip Out Phil's Heart And Grind It Beneath The Feet Of Mobsters, but apparently there wasn't a flower for that.

The humor is on point, and I am a sucker for pining!Phil and sarcasm. It’s a fake marriage fic, where they’re undercover as a couple. Tell me that doesn’t sound perfect for these two. BUT WAIT, there’s more: they’re already a thing before the fake marriage mission, and Phil has been feeling insecure in the relationship! Voicing concerns in a healthy manner is out of the question, naturally. Idiots.

It takes place over six months, featuring flashbacks to how Phil ended up in a strip club run by the mob, smiling lovingly at his husband while a mobster talks about how great they are together.

Plenty of miscommunication on par with the trope, and you just want to give Clint a hug, becasue you know what’s going on, but Phil can’t catch a hint. It has art at the end, too, which is adorable.

The Clothes that Make the Man by orderlychaos words: 17k+ rating: E

There was something comforting in the way Clint could focus on Coulson’s dry, deadpan tone as bullets and explosions sounded around him. Come rain, hail or bursts of experimental weaponry, Agent Coulson would be there, calm and controlled in that damn suit, like the personification of order against chaos.

However, contrary to rumour, Phil Coulson was not born in a suit. This is the story of how Clint Barton glimpsed the man underneath and fell in love.

(Or five times Clint saw Phil outside of a suit and the one time he wore a suit himself).

IT’S A FIVE AND ONE, boys, we’ve made it. This my favorite trope in all of fanfiction history. It’s also pre-avengers for the first half, but then kinda after? Coulson isn’t dead and doesn’t appear to ever have been, but in the later chapters, the Avengers are a thing? I’m not sure about timelines. It’s an AU, and it’s awesome.

The important part is that there’s Clint POV and insecurity on both sides, as well as really sweet moments and pinning galore. Plus, it’s rated E, so obviously that too. It’s fairly lighthearted in general as well (meaning there are feelings and angst but there aren’t feelings and angst, if you know what I mean), and after some of the angst on this list, lighthearted fics are a gift.

Coulson Lives - Reunion

Give a Dog a Bone by Laura Kaye (laurakaye) Words: 86k+ Rating: E

What do you do when your dead best friend turns up alive after three years? a) yell at him b) hug him c) ignore him to his face while following him around the Tower like a creeper d) maybe fall in love with him a little e) all of the above

Best summary, or best summary?

This does not have enough kudos or recognition. I know it’s at nearly 960, and that’s a great amount, but it deserves so much more! I still think about this story, and it’s another one I want to re-read soon.

When I mentioned Pizza Dog, this is one of the ones I had in mind.

And Kate!!! His friendship with Kate is everything I’ve ever wanted. And his friendship with Tony, and obviously Nat. Basically, I love Clint having friends and getting to be petty becasue holy shit he deserves to be petty after everything SHIELD has put them all through. At the same time, nothing feels like Phil!whump or emotionally beating a character down unnecessarily.

Clint does everything I want him to, and some stuff I didn’t even know I wanted him to do. There is so much pain, as you’d expect, but there is so much payoff and the balance is perfect. I connect with Clint’s characterization in general, but especially here. Just yes.

Phil’s journey with the loss of his hand and adjusting to life with a prosthetic is also really cool, and something I hardly ever see. Same goes for Clint’s hearing loss. He isn’t deal, but and is completely capable/confident in himself, but there are struggles at times that make me wonder if the author has personal experience because it’s stuff I recognize from my mom’s experiences.

doesn't matter if I bleed by t_fic (topaz), topaz, topaz119 (topaz) Words: 25k+ Rating: E

Clint's never pretended to be deep. He's just the guy who sits back and watches, the guy who makes the shot when he needs to. He's seen a lot of crap in his time, sat through a lot of fucked-up scenes to get to where he needs to be, but this, now--he can't stand another second of it.

This feels like an argument for why the pairing works, and I loved it. It really deep dives into the issues all three of them - Clint, Nat, and Phil - have in a way that feels so real and relatable to me, personally, that it cut me right to the core. I still can't get over the incredible friendship between Clint and Nat in this. I loved every minute, and every win was so, so deserved. I want to curl up and live in the world the author created, tbh. Also, there are sexytimes. Can't forget those.

Tony also has the line early on that nearly made me cry: "Someone has some serious fucking explaining to do, because you," he pokes at Coulson, "we fucking buried you." The scene is already so emotionally charged, and then this and it kills me becasue of all the off-page backstory and emotional weight it gives for the rest of the story.

I’m emo and dramatic about all of these, but I mean it when I say it feels like proof for why Clint and Phil work. Just, yes.

Coulson Lives - some point after the off-page reunion

The Best Bad Ideas by copperbadge words: 17k+ rating: M

When Clint Barton put on the Captain America costume for a mission, he didn't count on Phil Coulson's reaction. Coulson didn't count on Clint crashing his new team to do something about it.

Oh yeah, you read that right. It’s just as funny as it sounds, and all of a sudden you get hit with the angst and it works. Even so, this one is a lot lighter and it’s fun. Cap and Co’s reactions are just as funny, and the gossip sessions between the ensemble are some of my favorite bits. (side note: why have I never considered the badass-ery that would be a Nat and Melinda May friendship?)

Pine Lake Oasis by infiniteeight words: 32k+ rating: E

When SHIELD gets intel that an arms dealer might soon be receiving Chitauri technology, Fury sends Clint and Coulson undercover to establish surveillance, ingratiate themselves with the arms dealer and his right hand man, and possibly intercept the sale. The catch? The arms dealer and his lieutenant are apparently posing as a couple, which means the best way for Clint and Coulson to get close is to pose as a couple, too. The longer the op goes on, the more Clint wonders which relationship is more real.

MORE PRETEND MARRIED TROPES! We can never have too many, in my humble opinion. This one is very different from the mobster one, because it’s set in suberbia with plenty of nosy neighbors and also some arms dealers who are also posing as a couple. Frankly, I’m not sure anyone is posing as anything in this fic when it comes to feelings.

The domesticity in this story is so good and it’s so sad watching them get used to it and hearing Clint think it can’t last...but then! And everything feels earned by the end, instead of just tossed in. You watch them get closer over the course of the story and I love it.

They’re sassy and sarcastic and funny, and so true to the characters we’ve come to love that it all feels so believable.

Just torakowalski Fics

(Yes. I did add a whole section just for one author. If I hadn’t, every category would be overrun, and there are so many good fics out there! But this author gets me, and more importantly, gets Clint and Phil, so it had to be done.)

Been Looking at You Forever words: 18k+ (closer to 19k) rating: E

Clint and Phil are friends. Friends who have sex. That’s all there is to it. Honestly.

Fuckbuddies with a healthy dose of accidental relationship because whoops, who knew “casual” sex with hidden feelings would lead to complications and more feelings?? Set post-Avengers movie, and including all the main faves as side characters.

Guys, I’ll be real with you for a second. I don’t ship either stucky or Tony/Pepper, and yet this has both as background but blatant relationships. And I still don’t ship them, but I believed it within the story and I wasn’t bothered? If that doesn’t tell you how good of a writer tora is...

I am addicted to the way they write Clint and Phil, and the fact that it doesn’t look like they’ll be writing more for that pairing makes me hold on tighter to the stories we do have. Sure, the premise of this fic is a trope, but the relationships between the characters puts it on another level for me. This one will make you crave more of this trope out of all your fave pairings, trust me.

And All the Clocks Came Back to Life Words: 4k+ Rating: T

Phil Coulson isn't a big fan of birthdays, but they're better than being dead.

Pizza Dog is a character again, and so is my favorite apartment complex in Marvel Comics continuity. This is the sweetest story (it’s also the shortest one on this list *gasp*) and it doesn’t have anything explicit, which I know some people prefer, but trust me. The way tora writes these boys is so worth the read. I have the warm-fuzzies just thinking about this fic again - I dare you not to feel like smiling with this one. Naturally, there are grounded feels too, and I just want to protect Clint with my whole being. Luckily, I’m pretty sure Coulson does, too.

Both characterizations are on point.

Keeping the World at Bay Words: 25k+ Rating: E

Finding out that Phil's alive and working with a new team isn't easy for Clint, and neither is helping Captain America track down the brainwashed Hydra assassin that used to be Bucky Barnes.

This is another one where I still don’t ship stucky, but god damnit I’m here for everything in this fic. Clint gets to be fucking amazing in this one, both physically and on an emotional connective-ness level. It uses his own neuroses and backlog of problem/coping mechanisms and puts them to use in the best way. You know, if you’ve seen the movie Age of Ultron (meh movie overall but there are elements I adored) that Clint has the potential to fill the mentor position so well. He gets to do that here, or at least begin down that sort of path, and I loved it.

For all my stony babes, I urge you to give it a shot. Just this once, let me peer pressure you.

I am also always here for Clint getting to be pissed off, because HELLO, he’s got a right. And my heart went out to Phil so hard. Guys, it’s a double reunion fic, as well as the first time potential best friends meet, why are you sleeping on this??

Back to The Place You Are Words: 7k+ Rating: E

Phil Coulson was sitting two tables over from Clint and wearing his Dress Blues. This was making concentrating on anything else pretty much impossible.

Normally, I am Not A Fan of fics where they are broken up from the get-go. Or maybe I just have to be in the right mood/mind set for that brand of angst. AND YET. This fic.

It’s Tony and Pepper’s wedding, and naturally Phil has to dress the part right? Clint should have been prepared, but clearly, he was not. This one is pretty much smut with angst and feels, and like Clint, I was not prepared for how much I would love reading it.

What We've Got Here Is Enough words: 7k+ rating: E

They don’t fuck in the Avengers’ Mansion, that’s rule number one of Having A Secret Relationship With Your Ex-Handler.

This one was great, and involves how the rest of the team finds out about their relationship. Not a ton to say aside from what I’ve already said about how tora writes these two!

Want more recommendations? Let me know! Maybe I ship what you ship and we can scream about the great fanfic together.

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