#oh this is also why I hate like... advertising

[foreos]

hatchetfield characters rated on how much they like sonic the hedgehog

- paul matthews: 7/10 i think just based on his age and personality he played like sonic adventure one as a kid and enjoyed it but hasn’t really thought about it since. if he were to play a sonic game again he’d be like “oh i remember this guy! silly :)” he does not like the chaotix.

- emma perkins: 5/10 i can see a young emma being Violently Opposed to sonic and never playing it or engaging with any content. and then at some point ziggs or even paul has her play one of the games with them and she’s like “Oh Wait This Is Fun” but idk if she’d ever consider herself a fan.

- bill woodward: 1/10 he cannot remember sonic’s name. he is completely ambivalent because he doesn’t know what that is. he’d have an appreciation for tails if he knew he existed

- charlotte sweetly: 0/10 he creeps her out. i think there’s so much going on in her life that there is no room for sonic the hedgehog.

- ted spankoffski: 10/10 he also played the games as a kid and still enjoys him though he does not advertise that at all. in college he and jenny did smoke and play the entirety of sonic 06 together. he probably hasn’t really played them since at all since it contrasts with the new everything. he watched sonic underground.

- henry hidgens 0/10 he doesn’t trust sonic.

- melissa: 11/10 she loves sonic and you can interpret that however you want

- john mcnamara: 0/10 i cannot imagine this man with a game controller in his hands.

- tom houston: -10000/10 he is a technophobe and sonic frustrates him. he finds the characters annoying and tim keeps having to beat the levels for him and he doesn’t know why sonic is looking at him like that at the end of every level.

- becky barnes: 8/10 she just thinks he’s the silliest guy. i think becky would like sonic and the black knight and get a kick out of the gimmicky motion controls. i like to picture becky having stupid fun it brings me joy.

- lex foster: 0/10 no time for that also that’s kind of dumb also also where are his clothes.

- ethan green: current 1/10, potential 10/10, ethan has never touched a sonic game in his life but i think if he did he’d be hooked.

- hannah foster: 5/10 she has never touched a sonic game and isn’t really a video game person but she has nothing against the guy.

- frank pricely: 9/10 i think frank watched SatAM as a kid and the franchise is special to him even if he doesn’t really engage. probably drew pictures of sonic and tails as a kid.

- linda monroe: 1/10 it’s beneath her. linda probably doesn’t like video game and i think she’d find everyone really fucking annoying. river likes sonic though :)

- sherman young: 1000/10 but he’s not fun about it. if you like something he doesn’t then you’re fucking stupid. why does sonic have a sword. why is sonic in a car. i don’t know sherman. he refuses to play a lot of the games and is very much a purist about a lot of shit. he hates silver the hedgehog sooooo much.

- zoey chambers: 0/10 would shame sonic likers.

- miss holloway: 5/10 sonic is too nineties for her eighties but some of the kids she’s worked with liked it and she has nothing against the guy.

- duke keane: 8/10 i think like becky he would enjoy stupid fun.

- ziggs: 10/10 i think ziggs is a sonic fan. and i’m not saying that just because they’re a furry i think they’d genuinely like it. they are not good at most of the games though, they usually can’t make it past the typical sonic late game difficulty boost. ziggs hasn’t read the comics but they might have watched some of the cartoons, you know?

- rose: 6/10 i think she would have a lot of fun if she played the games but it’s never gonna be something she gets super into. sonic games do tend to have fantastic soundtracks so maybe she’d eat that shit up.

- daniel (stopwatch): 100/10 he really likes sonic. sonic is his kind of guy. i think daniel is a big shadow fan.

- sophia (spitfire): 5/10 she has nothing against the guy but she doesn’t know who blaze is or why daniel keeps bringing it up.

- pete spankoffski: 12/10 he inherited ted’s old games and LOVED them. he doesn’t really engage with the non game media but i think he’s played like most of the games.

- stephanie lauter: 2/10 what’s this nerd shit? weird :/. i think she’d like it if she tried it.

- richie lipschitz: 10000/10 he loves sonic. he loveeeeeees sonic. he has read the comics he has seen the shows he can name all the characters. richie knows the lore. richie used to have a crush on sally acorn. richie can go on the worlds longest rant about sonic forces okay it just never ends. he thinks shadow is The Coolest Guy and he embraces the franchise wholeheartedly.

- ruth fleming: 1000/10 she likes sonic a lot. she knows so much about all the games and she loves going so so so fast. i think she also read the comics and watched the cartoons and i think her and richie argue about it like all the time. she does have a thing for rouge the bat AND shadow and i think she has a little plushie chao keychain on her backpack.

- grace chasity: -10000000000000/10 she HATES sonic she hates him so much. he fills her with so much rage she fucking hates his ass. number one sonic hater.

BONUS:

- wiggly: 0/10 this game is hard to play with tentacles

- blinky: 5/10 he doesn’t really care but watching the hedgehog go zoom is fun

- tinky: 10/10 he loves this shit he wants sonic to go FASTER

- nibbly: 0/10 he doesn’t care he eated his controller

- pokey: -10/10 he thinks sonic is an attention whore and only he gets to do that

- webby: 100000/10 webby would like sonic do you see the vision do you see it. i think webby eats that shit up.

[lazuliquetzal]

Whee Fight Scenes! (This Is A Seirei no Moribito Advertisement)

For the past couple of years I have been almost exclusively writing fanfiction for action-fantasy video games which has led to me developing opinions on writing fight scenes. I used to hate writing them because what even happen fight, really, like what the hell??? But now I’ve learned to tolerate them! Sometimes I even enjoy writing them! So now I will share my wisdom with you. 

(Disclaimer: This post was written so I could avoid writing a fight scene.)

My credentials: I occasionally write fight scenes in my action-fantasy video game fanfictions, and I have seen Seirei no Moribito the anime several times. I do not claim to be an expert on fight scenes, but I do claim to love Seirei no Moribito to bits.

Part 1. The Set Up

There’s this excellent anime about a mercenary on a life-long quest for redemption who ends up taking a cursed prince under her protection. It’s about unraveling propaganda and colonialism, and also about kicking ass. The first time I watched this anime, when I got to the episode 3 rice field fight, I thought, “holy shit, I see now that a good fight scene requires not only a kick-ass fight, but also narrative/emotional build up in order to give the scene weight and tension.”

Like, lots of anime have excellent and extremely iconic fights, but this was the show that really made the writing aspect of it stick in my brain. Seirei no Moribito is also an adaptation of a book, which might why this stood out to me: the way its fight scenes are constructed are not as reliant on the actual visuals so much as they are on everything else (the animation for the fight is gorgeous, too, like, just watch this show please it’s so good). That said, I haven’t actually read the book. But I have seen this show several times and the rice field fight gets me so hype.

(And also every other fight scene. I’m never over episode 13. If you have to watch only one (1) episode of Seirei no Moribito, watch episode 13. But also, don’t do that. Watch the entire thing you coward.)

Anyway. What’s going on in Seirei no Moribito episode 3?

Part 1a. The Narrative Stage

Ep3 is early on in the series. The rice field fight is not the first action scene, but it is the first fight scene. This is what we know going in:

Balsa, our main character, is a formidable mercenary with a practical mind and a strong sense of honor. She has sworn to protect Chagum, the prince of the Empire. Her goal is to keep Chagum alive at all costs, because saving his life is crucial to her personal goal of redemption.

The Emperor (Chagum’s father) has dispatched his elite warriors to kill the prince, as they believe that he is possessed by an evil water spirit. Their goal is to kill the prince because the evil water spirit is a bad omen for the empire, and they believe that killing the prince will save the kingdom.

Balsa’s spear is damaged, and she is outnumbered. She has the disadvantage.

We are, of course, rooting for Balsa and Chagum at this point in the story. Balsa’s our main character, she’s super cool, and child assassination is a bad look. We know that Balsa is strong: we’ve seen her do athletic stunts, and it’s been alluded to that she is extremely skilled with the spear. This fight is the first time we get to see her use it, so it’s very exciting to the viewer. We want to see her in action.

Part 1b. The Emotional Stage

Chagum doesn’t have much of a personality at this point: we know he’s a child prince, and we know his dad wants to kill him. So we don’t know him well, but he’s already sympathetic due to circumstance.

When Balsa and Chagum get to the rice fields, they are almost home-free. They’ve spent a lot of effort trying to redirect the emperor’s warriors and the plan almost worked. We are extremely close to safety, so the fact that this is when the emperor’s elite catch up is very tense and frustrating.

All this puts the audience in the mindset of: oh man, they’re so close, I really need Balsa to win! I don’t want the kid die! You can taste the safety, you are almost there—it’s the type of tension that gets you invested in the outcome of the fight.

Part 1c. The Physical Stage

The first half, and the faster-paced portion of the fight takes place in a rice field at night (a classic). Wide open, with water to splash in, and nowhere to hide. It’s right on the edge of the thick forest, which gives Balsa and Chagum an immediate goal: get to the denser terrain so that they might break line of sight of their pursuers.

The second half of the fight is less of a fight and more of a close-up, emotional moment of action. It takes place in a clearing by the edge of the forest.

The physical location of the fight ties in with the short-term goals of the characters: the open field forces Balsa into direct confrontation even though she wants to run, and the clearing by the edge of the forest gives Jin (one of the emperor’s warriors) the illusion of privacy when he tries to kill Chagum, and it gives Balsa cover to hide until she can intervene.

Part 1 – TL;DR

Even before you get to the actual fight, the setup of the fight has inherent tension and intrigue. One can reasonably assume that Balsa and Chagum will survive, because this is episode 3 of a 26 episode anime. But you don’t know if her damaged spear will hold out. You don’t know why the emperor wants Chagum dead. You don’t know if Balsa will kill the emperor’s guards, or if she’ll be able to make a clean getaway with the prince. All these uncertainties create mystery, which creates tension. And tension is what makes the fight fun.

Part 2. The Purpose

I mentioned earlier that this is the first actual fight in the show.

It’s the payoff for a bunch of little questions that have cropped up so far. How strong is Balsa? Is she good enough to win, even when outnumbered? What does her fighting style look like?

A lot of action stories have big fight early on, and that’s because a well-done fight scene squeezes in a massive amount of characterization. In this fight, we learn a lot about Balsa, and we learn a lot about the Emperor and the difference between the Emperor and the people who work for him.

Some questions that get explored: How do they think under pressure? What kind of fighting do they do? Are they strategic? Reactive? Brute force or trickster? How do they solve problems? How far are these people willing to go to achieve their goals?

There’s a moment in this fight when Balsa is wounded, and the emperor’s warriors retrieve Prince Chagum. Balsa ends up retreating into the forest. Jin says something along the lines of: she’s a mercenary, she works for money and she’s already been paid; she won’t risk her life to come back and get the prince.

But she does. Even though she’s been wounded, and even though she had the perfect opportunity to walk away, she comes back and saves Prince Chagum at the expense of her own health. Balsa keeps her promises; Balsa’s personal quest for redemption is more important to her than her life. We know her, now!

Fight scenes are great for characterization because it’s a deviation from status quo. A person’s default state is not “battle,” and stories thrive on extraordinary circumstances. “How does this character change/act/perform under pressure?” is a really great characterization question, and a fight scene is the opportunity to show the answer rather than tell it.

Fight scenes are also great for thematic debate. You get the opportunity to literalize the conflict between different philosophies via characters fighting each other. EZ story moment. You know that one Howard Ashman quote about how, in musicals, the characters sing when they’re too emotional to speak? That’s what fight scenes are to me. The characters fight when they can’t talk to each other.

And then, of course, a fight scene is also moving the plot along. The conflict is happening, information is being exchanged/discovered/buried. Some characters life, some characters get hurt, some characters die. A fight scene is a way to physically bring characters to the state they need to be in for the story to progress (in the right emotional state, the right physical state, the right location, etc). Lots of things going on, which is good—you want all of your scenes to be purposeful.

Part 3. The Details

All of that had to do with the zoomed-out, overall story view of the fight (how the fight fits into the overall story). I am now going to continue to gush about the episode 3 rice field fight up close (how does the fight scene work in isolation). Because Seirei no Moribito rocks.

Part 3a. The Setting

I already mentioned the open rice field/dense forest dichotomy and how that affects the characters’ short-term goals. It’s also a great choice to establish Balsa’s superior technical ability with her spear. The rice field is wide open and relatively flat—no obstructions or distractions, with everyone on equal ground. There are no tricks to pull, no environmental quirks to exploit: this is a clean fight between Balsa and the emperor’s warriors. When she comes out on top, it’s because she’s better than them.

Depending on the character, it might be better to change the terrain. Have the stealthy warrior fight in a forest, where they can appear and reappear and use their sneakiness to their advantage. Put a trickster in a situation where they can improvise traps. There is an aspect of your character that you want to show off, so set the stage so that they can show off. It’ll be totally badass and fun.

Part 3b. The Short-Term Goals

When you read a story, you can reasonably assume that the protagonist will stay alive (especially if you are not near the end of the story). Knowing the outcome can make a story stale if you're not careful. You can lose tension if there’s no risk. Some stories try to create a world/tone/atmosphere so that anyone can die. A lot don’t because that’s a little depressing.

My friend @yellowocaballero has an excellent post on this regarding OP protagonists, but to summarize: if you know the protagonist is always going to win the physical fight, you have to make the win condition not about that. Balsa isn’t OP, but giving characters goals beyond “win the fight” can make a fight so much more interesting.

In the rice field fight, Balsa does not have to defeat the emperor's warriors: she has to get Chagum and herself away alive. Her goal is to make a clean getaway. When the warriors show up, she makes the decision to confront them, and her goal is not just to win, but to win so decisively that they won’t be able to follow her. When Chagum gets caught, she changes her goal to ‘keep him safe at all costs, no matter the harm done to myself’, and she gets seriously wounded. She can succeed in some goals, but fail in others, and the story reacts and keeps changing. It’s the same principle behind why rolling a nat 1 is so entertaining in D&D. The more you fail, the more creative you have to get. 

Part 3c. Monkey Brain

There is just something so cool and so satisfying and so fun about seeing a character kick ass. There is also something very cool and very satisfying about seeing a character get beat up. The rice field fight has it all: Balsa kicking ass, and also getting beat up. It’s fun! Fight scenes that know exactly why they are cool are just so good. Hell yeah, overindulge and use every single weapon despite how impractical they are. Yes please show someone pulling off an unrealistic move for the coolness factor. Absolutely include the explosion-that-would-definitely-kill-but-doesn’t. 

Part 3 — TL;DR 

If you want the fight to be cool, make it cool! Set it in a cool place! Give your characters opportunities to show off! Make it interesting by changing the win conditions! Conflicting goals forces characters to prioritize and it makes scenes fun!

Part 4. Words???

Unfortunately, as mentioned, Seirei no Moribito is an anime and I haven’t read the book so I cannot analyze and gush about its prose in this section. Otherwise, the advertisement would continue. You’re safe for the moment.

Re: prose, there’s probably a post out there that goes over the language of fight scenes better than I ever could. I write with the diction of a middle-grade author because I read PJatO too much as a child and it rewrote my DNA. This is not a bad thing, this is just a fact. So I’m just gonna fire off fight scene writing advice I heard from around:

Filter words — if you want a more immersive reading experience, you want to avoid filtering the action through the narration. So use sentences like: “Her arm hurt” as opposed to “she felt her arm hurt”. But if you’re trying to distance the reader, like recreating the feeling of shock/dissociation, then filter words would help achieve that effect.

Make the rhythm of your prose match the energy of the fight. Short and choppy feels fast in the brain. Long and wordy feels overwhelming. Fragmented sentences and run-ons are chaotic. Customize the vibes.

Establish the important details of the setting beforehand so that you don’t have to stop the action to describe the specific placement of a relevant tree stump. I think I heard this one from Brandon Sanderson on a podcast somewhere, but I think about it a lot when I write because blocking is hard enough and it's even harder when you have to stop and attempt to translate the movie in your head into words. I can’t tell you how to block a fight scene. We need to find someone else who is smarter that can tell us.

Part 5. The Point

Fight Scenes are Fun, actually. They can be really effective if you set them up properly! If you know what you want to do with them, you can arrange it to be as cool as possible! You don’t have to be in a visual medium to make fights fun. You just have to figure out how to translate the cool bits into prose, which I think is mostly done through giving your fight cool shit on both the macro story level scale and the micro scene level scale. 

Also, watch Seirei no Moribito.

[deoidesign]

Are you slowly going insane over your OWN ocs?

No, I've been infected by brainworms the entire time. Nothing slow about it.

But honestly, no... It's not really about my characters to me. I love my characters, of course, and I love telling stories, and I hope to keep making art of my characters every day until I die.

But it's not about them! They're not REALLY what I love, what I love is people! And I hope I can leave the world with a hundred different love letters so my readers can feel how much I love them for even one day longer than I am here.

My characters are a conduit through which I can give that to people. I want nothing more than to make someone feel a little more loved, a little more seen, and a little less alone. And my characters are the best way I know how to do that.

So for that, they're incredibly important to me... But they're not for me. They're for you!

So I hope you enjoy them

and I hope you can feel that I love you through them.

[icewindandboringhorror]

my fellow advertising haters, which commercials do you currently yell ‘shut up shuT UP’ at every time they pop up before a youtube video or etc.?

[tigergendermoved]

I watched the mario movie earlier. It was okayyy

[taylor-titmouse]

hey i want to talk about how you should be promoting your work as an erotic author/illustrator

i'm writing this up because the marketing aspect of my work as an erotic author/illustrator is a science to me, and also because i'm the guy who gets unreasonably annoyed when i see other creators not properly advertising their work. you presumably want to make money off your work. this post will be written under the assumption you want to make money off your work but are doing a bad job at it. it will be very confrontational. if you read this and feel attacked you're right and i am attacking you.

this is geared toward selling erotic comics/writing/books/art as products. i will probably write more than one post about this subject so if i didn't touch on something you want to know more about, comment/send me an ask and i'll keep it in mind for the next one.

i will start with my first and least specific but most important point:

DON'T GET FUCKING CUTE

hi are you paying attention. i'm gripping you by the sides of your face. do not get fucking cute with what you are trying to sell. you are not a big enough property to get cute, nobody LIKES it when big properties get cute, and you are selling porn. you have to own this. you have to be up front about this. don't be tongue in cheek, don't be all teehee i wonder what this could be~, don't be secretive. you are selling a product. you have to fucking act like it. you are an adult selling pornography to other adults. i am GRIPPING your HEAD you NEED to understand this.

and to be clear when i say 'cute' i mean coy. i don't mean cutesy, as in the aesthetic. you can be as hello kitty pastel ten emojis a post uwu as you like when you're building your audience and generating hype. but when you start trying to sell, don't be vague, don't be sarcastic, don't mislabel your work as a joke and assume everyone is on it. because they're not.

you must always assume 75% of the people seeing the thing you are advertising have no fucking idea who you are. and that includes a huge chunk of the people who already follow you. they do not know who you are or what you've been working on for two months or why they should care about it. they just got here. somebody just reposted it. they are seeing it for the first time. most people are only looking at social media for a tiny chunk of their day. they are not keeping up with you. you cannot get cute about what you are trying to sell because nobody knows what it is until you tell them.

okay are you still with me. we are going to talk about clarity now.

YOU GOTTA TELL ME WHAT IT IS

good lord the amount of times i have gone to buy somebody's comic or book and had no idea what's actually in it or what it's about. who are the characters? why should i care about them? what do they do in it? what is the premise of this thing you want me to spend $5 on? why would you not tell me? i'm shaking you again. please i have to know what i'm buying i only have so much money to spend on porn.

porn, arguably more than any other genre, relies on knowing exactly what is in it. you do not want to surprise your readers with a kink they were unaware of! and on the flip side, you do not want to miss out on your target audience! if your book contains a hot spider babe laying eggs in an elf, you have to say so. not just so people who don't want to read about eggs know it isn't for them, but so the people who are egg crazy can see that and go "oh fuck YES i love EGGS here is my $5 and an extra $2 tip for catering to me specifically". a contents/features list is as much an advertisement as it is a warning!

as for re: who the characters are and why should i care, i'm sorry but you need to learn how to write sales copy. you have to write blurbs. you have to get good at the shit that goes on the back of a book. we all hate it but we have to do it. i want to know who the characters are and what the context is. i, personally, am not interested in contemporary stories as much as fantasy and historical. please tell me what genre this porn exists in so i know if it aesthetically appeals to me. pull some books off your shelves and see how they do it. hell man go look at mine.

while you're there, note that every single book of mine has a sample of what's in it. this feels like such a no-brainer to me but again! the amount of times i have gone to buy somebody's work and they don't show me what their work looks like! you gotta give me the first page or two! just enough that i know if i like the way your writing sounds, or the way you draw your comics! i don't know you! i am not going to trust that you're good at what you do just based on a cover. the cover is to get me to this step, it is not the only step. you have to show me that you're worth spending my money on!

to put it less cynically, you want to catch my interest. you want me to go 'oh i want to see more of this', you want me to go 'ahh i want to know where this goes!' you need to get me invested and craving more. earn my $5!!!

YOU HAVE TO MAKE IT EASY TO GIVE YOU MONEY

hey go look at your bio right now. go look at your pinned post. do you have a link to your patreon there? do you have a link to your itchio/gumroad/whatever? do i have to click more than once to get to the places you want me to go to give you money? why? why are you making me click twice? have we learned nothing from every website making you click an extra time when they make some stupid UI update and how much it pisses us off? i have already given up, i have forgotten you, i am not giving you my $5 today. put your links in the easiest places to get to them.

god literally as i was writing this post i went to go find somebody's itchio to see how they described their work and it was not anywhere on their profile. grabbing you and shaking you PUT THE LINK WHERE I CAN FIND IT. don't make it hard! make it easy! i am a dickhead sitting on the toilet scrolling, saw your post, and was interested enough to read further. but you made me go to your bio to find your linktree and oops i have already gone back to my timeline to look at the boobies in the next post. stop wasting precious bio space on DNIs and put your fuckin links there!!!

this is more for the twitter people, but: just put the link in the damn post. just say the word commission. just say it's for patreon. "wuh wuh the algorithm" it is not the damn algorithm it's that everybody hates advertising and nobody wants to retweet ads. putting slashes in the words doesn't do anything and you look like a fool. i have posted so much art that says it's 'a commission for ___" and it did exactly as good as any other art despite having the word commission in it. and by doing the slashes you just made it impossible for anybody to search your account for your commission information (which should be at the VERY LEAST in a post under your pinned tweet if you're not actively posting about them being open).

okay that went on a tangent i'm going to back to the point of putting the link in the tweet. put it in the first post. not in the first reply. don't tell them to go to your bio. put it in the post people are actually going to share. it's fine to put more information in the thread but people are only ever going to share the first post. so put the link there. you have to make it easy. putting links in tweets can hurt you algorithmically, even in the replies. so you're better off having it in the post that actually gets seen and shared. i don't want to open the tweet and scroll to get to your sales page where i ASSUME you will have put all the information anyway. put it in the tweet that just got retweeted by itself onto my dash!

also you have to share it a ton of times. i repost my shit every few hours when i'm trying to push a new product. as i said before people are not 24/7 looking at their timelines. they missed it the first time. they missed it the second time. they didn't get paid yet that week but they were after the eighth time and you reminded them again so they finally bought it. that i will still get sales every time i repost a book ad weeks after release says there are always people who missed it, or who only just showed up.

abandon your pride and shill. shills pay their bills. anyone who gets annoyed about it isn't giving you money in the first place. don't worry about looking like a sell out. don't apologize for plugging your own work. post about it often, post about it in different ways. post about it. post about it. you are not going to make money if people don't know you have something to sell them. if you want to make a career out of it, you need to act like it.

I DON'T HAVE A FOURTH POINT

kisses your forehead. i'm sorry for yelling at you. i've been making and publishing and selling adult art for the past two-three years and have got myself to the point where it pays my rent, and i got there by paying attention to what does and does not work.

please do your best to make money. i want you to make money.

as i said above i plan to write more posts on this subject, such as cover design, how to actually write sales copy, and best practices with running a patreon, but if there's things you would want to hear more about leave a comment or send an ask! i will probably be less aggressive on future topics. these are just things that have grinded my gears for a grip.

[bibluebutterfly]

Hoo boy. Now I've made it known multiple times on my blog that I LOATHE the whoobiefication of Vox, but lets get into why/how Vox is NOT a good person nor a baby that needs protecting and why he's all the better for it. Buckle up ladies and gentlemen, this will be long.

Now, why isn't Vox a good person? Easy. Because he (along with the other Vees) is supposed to be the bad guy of the story. Shocking, I know. Vox was NEVER intended to be a good person, and some of y'all just need to accept that.

Now for the long part: HOW is he not a good person?

Well, first of all, his literal introduction is an ad selling drones HE DESIGNED specifically for stalking,"peeping on the neighbors has never been more stylish"

Right off the bat, this tells us he doesn't care about people unless he can profit off them.

Which is also backed up by the point that he ADVERTISES Val and Vels "love potions" which are basically just roofies.

Again. This man ONLY cares about profit first and foremost, screw the people who can get hurt/SA'd by his products.

Next, he has a power of hypnosis which he is NOT hesitant to use. He can take away someones free will at a glance and uses that to his full advantage.

He's also very willing to give Val his lowest earners to shoot. Notice that he does so with no hesitance and no regret.

Also, (and most significantly) he's a huge, HUGE enabler. This guy has cameras EVERYWHERE, ESPECIALLY when Valentino is involved. He's got cameras in Val's room, Angels old room, at Vals corner of the club (which moves when Val does), there's NO WAY he DOESN'T know that Val is a r@pist.

And DESPITE that, he still sleeps with the man, is very likely in love with him, and oh yeah, FUNDS HIS WHOLE DEAL. The cameras Val uses are Voxtech cameras.

Val may be the one who does the dirty work but Vox willingly and knowingly makes a profit off of that. He doesn’t just know and do nothing, he actively HELPS Val out and obviously has no second thoughts nor regrets about it.

This is not a look of disgust or discontent, this is fondness. Genuine fondness. For Valentino. As a PERSON. Let that sink in.

There’s also the implications that Vox is jealous of the attention Angel gets from Val. Angel gets abused constantly by Val, Vox KNOWS, and still hates Angel because of the sheer fact that he takes up so much of Vals attention.

Not to mention the HEAVY implications that he gets off on watching people suffer.

“Well Vox can still do better than Val!!”

While I’m at it, I guess I should bring up the fact that BOTH Vox and Val are MASSIVE red flags.

With Val, aside from the obvious, he’s also a huge attention whore for Vox and isn’t afraid to break Vox’s property if Vox doesn’t pay attention to him. Yeah Vox gets frustrated with him, who wouldn’t be when their lover is throwing temper tantrums every other day?

With Vox, again, aside from the obvious, isn’t afraid to handle Val roughly when he’s mad, and literally screams about how watching his arch nemesis/obsession get the crap beat out of him is better than sex. Right in front of Val by the way. In regular circumstances, 9.98/10 that’s gonna get your ass dumped in a second.

Not to mention the mutual condescension ation towards each other.

And as much as fans (including myself admittedly) like to shit on Val for being a man child, Vox is literally no better.

Plus the explosive tempers.

Seriously. Vox LITERALLY cannot do better than Val. Vox is the only one who can put up with Vals BS and vice versa.

OH YEAH and lets not forget one last thing: VOX ALSO ABUSES HIS OWN EMPLOYEES.

This dude is scared of him, and it’s NOT because he’s worried about getting fired.

So yes. Vox is not nor HAS EVER been a good person.

And for me personally, I love that. I love that he’s entertaining yet awful. I love his dynamic with Alastor, and I love his relationship with Val even more.

If you’re wondering why I personally love Staticmoth, it’s because basic couple rules do not apply to them. They’re both toxic narcissistic red flags and therefore they can be as awful as they want to each other, and the other will simply shake it off. Yet there’s still heavy trust between the two (never being scared of each other) and they still have little moments together where they’re genuinely happy. It’s unique, and something I’ve never seen in media before.

Basically, if you liked Vox better when you thought he was a poor little baby being abused by Val, read a fan fiction. There’s a lot of them out there.

But people really just need to accept the fact that he’s an awful person. Always has been. He’s not better than Val by ANY means. He and Val are both evil pricks who deserve each other.

And guess what? LIKING AN EVIL CHARACTER DOES NOT MEAN YOU SUPPORT THEIR CHOICES. IT’S OKAY TO LIKE VOX EVEN IF HE IS EVIL.

But don’t go on saying that Vox was “ruined” as a character when all signs have always pointed to him being terrible.

[iwasthewind]

Venti and Diona's interaction in the alchemy event is so special to me... because Diona is someone who really hasn't had any reliable parental figures in her life at all. Her father is a drunkard who barely has any time for her. She got her vision because she walked into the pouring rain as a child, all alone, terrified, to look for her drunk father in a forest full of animals and monsters and bring him home. Her father takes better care of Razor than her. She was so lonely she talked to a spring in the hopes that the rumours were true and there really was a fairy inside, listening. And then the voices that used to answer stopped, too. Leaving her with nothing but a curse- any drink she mixed would be divine. She's only twelve at most and she works in a bar. Her employer exploits her skills for profit. There's advertisements around Mondstadt advertising Diona's drinks specifically. Everyone loves them. Diona hates them. Everyone tells her how lovely her drinks are. Diona herself, despite despising alcohol, is proud of her skills. That's so fucked up. That's all so fucked up.

There's so many jokes about "haha child wants to destroy the wine industry but works in a bar" and while I can see why people find it funny they're honestly...so tasteless. Diona is a child who villainizes alcohol because she can't bear the thought of her father being at fault for his actions because she loves him so much. That he could drink less and he could spend more time with her and he could help her with her emotions but never does. That he could spend time with her and immerse himself in her interests but he never does. That he's willing to do all this for other people instead, but not her. That he chooses to do these things for other people, but he almost never chooses to do them for her.

But Venti does. Venti chooses to do all these things with Diona. He calls all residents of Mond his children and that's Diona too. He takes the time to search Dragonspine for an ingredient she might like, he chats with her and accompanies her to the location of the alchemy event, he presumably spends hours with her as she searches for ingredients and mixes her drink, keeping her company and making sure she's safe.

He doesn't have to do this. He doesn't have to patiently endear himself to her because he knows she hates people who drink, he doesn't have to bother going all the way to Dragonspine to find her something unique because he knows she's proud of her creations, he doesn't have to spend hours in the company of a lonely child who he has nothing in common with-but he does.

So many people would think he's doing it for the drink, but they all lack reading comprehension skills because I said so. Diona wants to create a drink which keeps people sober. Venti isn't going to get drunk and he's not doing it for the drink. It isn't pity either, it's affection- he loves his child and he wants to spend time with her and make sure she's safe. That's all. They're so special to me <3

Oh and another thing that I forgot to add- the Spring Fairy Diona talked to, Callirhoe, only found the spring in Springvale thanks to "a gentle breeze guiding her." The person who listened to the cries and rants of a lonely child was also coincidentally someone guided there by Venti. Still girlie why that specific blessing 😔

[lqfiles]

SCORE THAT GOAL! — 21. man up and break it

(wc: 1.701)

“welcome in y/n! make sure to take of your shoes and follow me into the living room. you can hang your jacket up or leave it on the couch if you want.” jaemin blurted out in one go, already moving away from the door he had opened for you only a few seconds ago. appalled, all you could mutter out was a quick ‘hi jaemin’ before following his instructions.

“good to see that you came here safely.” jaemin settled down on the ground next to the coffee table placed in the room, beaming a bright smile your way. you felt awetruck, subconsciously smiling at jaemin. he was a pretty man, you always thought that was the case. “yeah, took me a while but i’m here now.”

“soooo, advertisement?” you took out your laptop and notebook, placing them onto the table before looking back at jaemin and nodding. “i just need you to look at my work and see if i could improve on anything.” jaemin also nodded in return, waiting for you to unpack all your equipment before continuing.

jaemin took out his phone. “would you like to see the work that got me a good grade?” he asked softly, phone still facing him in case you refused. you shook your head in agreement, shuffling closer to him to see his high quality work. you hummed. “you really put a lot of detail into everything, i don’t know if i can do all that..” you groaned, feeling a headache brew in the back of your mind. jaemin chuckled, dragging your laptop his way. “i can show you how i did some of those effects while explaining it at the same time, is that okay with you?”

you sat up more and sent jaemin a small nod. you were grateful that jaemin was willing to help you out on your assignment, you could exaggerate and say you owed him your life but it really did feel like that at the moment. especially with the way his brushed through various techniques and topics so briskly, simplifying it for you too. “is it okay if i get some water?” you whispered, hating that your thirst was breaking the steady process you were working on with jaemin. his kind smile made you feel more at ease, finally standing up and following his given directions.

the kitchen wasn’t that far and was easy to spot. you made your way into the room and went to the cupboard, extracting a glass from it before making your way over to the sink to get some water. “you’re (—).” a voice, all too quiet yet loud enough catch your attention, emerged from behind you. you squealed and almost dropped the cup. turning around, you weren’t sure who you were expecting, but a brown haired boy dressed in an equally brown cardigan who was around your height wasn’t your first thought.

“and you’re the roommate renjun.” you addressed back, remembering the mention of a roommate. the boy who stood in front of you let his gaze wander up and down your figure before nodding. “jisung is upstairs.” he spoke out, moving past you to wash his hands in the sink. you furrowed your brows and turned his way. why would he tell you this, and why was jisung here? “…okay.” was all you managed to respond back.

“i thought you’d want to say hi, apparently you two know each other.” renjun shrugged, moving himself away from the sink and instead to the fridge before rummaging through it. “oh, yeah.. yeah i know him.” you answered back hesitantly. you slowly stepped out of the kitchen, not too sure if this conversation was over but you didn’t care much, it was starting to get awkward.

“did you meet renjun?” jaemin asked as he saw you walk back in with your glass of water. you nodded, looking back into the kitchen. “he’s your roommate?” you didn’t know if you meant it in a positive or negative way, you’d like to believe it was more so out of disbelief. as in, your roommates with someone who seems to be the polar opposite of you? “yeah, renjun and i have been friends for three years now.” jaemin smiled, and you once again looked back at the door you just came out of. maybe opposite attracts?

“actually, i need to ask him something really quickly, can you stay here for a bit?” jaemin abruptly stood up, leaving your work open so you could continue yourself. you let him know that it was alright and went back to sit on the ground jaemin previously sat on. looking through your work, he definitely improved it by a lot. you felt bad, he was doing your coursework for you and all you are paying him back with was a few movie nights. maybe you’ll up your budget for your lunch and buy him some as well.

“hey.” the familiar deep voice that you were still not used to broke the silence you had gotten comfortable in. it made you snap your head up to the side, watching jisung peak his head around the corner of the door. he held a hesitant smile on his face, not sure what to say. you took it as the initiative to wave your hand back at him. “hi jisung.” jisung decided to fully enter the living room, still maintaining close proximity to the door. “what are you doing down here?” you asked.

“renjun kicked me out of his room since jaemin and him are having a private conversation.” jisung rolled his eyes, looking over at your figure seated on the ground. ‘man up and break it’. jeno’s words were practically stuck in jisung’s mind ever since he entered the apartment. he could see where jeno was coming from, they are in the same club, the same year, they even share the same friends. there was no reason for there to be an ‘awkward tension’, like jisung described it. “how long have you been here for?” he asked.

“almost an hour i think?” you checked the time on your phone to confirm your guess. jisung nodded, still leaning against the door. there was a silence that neither of them knew how to break, before jisung swallowed and spoke again. “how’s club practice? are you liking it?” jisung questioned curiously. you thought about it. were you liking it? partially. because of him, but he didn’t need to know that. “it’s alright, i think i’m getting the hang of the game. though i’m not as good as you and jeno are.” you shyly smiled.

“practice makes perfect you know, i’m sure in a few months you’ll be up to par with either one of us.” you could’ve sworn you saw the slightest hint of a smile on his face when you looked back at him. “i guess you’re right… how is sociology?” you decided to ask back, not wanting to take this opportunity of a two sided conversation for granted. jisung thought for a second before answering. “alright too? i’m currently doing my homework in renjun’s room for it.”

as if on cue, both renjun and jaemin had seemingly summoned out of nowhere, entering the room after one another. jaemin held an apologetic smile on his face. “sorry (—), we’ll have to continue this another day since me and renjun have some house stuff to take care of.” jaemin apologised, pouting at you with a genuine expression of guilt. you shook your head. “it’s okay, we already did quite a lot, thank you for your help.” you thanked him, already packing up your stuff.

“and you need to go too.” renjun turned towards jisung, who frowned. “what? but i’m always here.” jisung protested. “well not today, we need both of you out.” renjun rubbed his face. “jisung be a gentleman and take her home, it’s getting dark outside these days.” renjun lastly said before walking back up the stairs. “but-” the sound of a door closing was enough for jisung to realise there was no ‘but’s. jaemin apologised once more before making his way up the stairs himself.

jisung slowly looked over at you who was already staring at him in silence. it took him a few seconds before he let out a sigh. “come on, he’s right. it’s getting late.” jisung sighed before he turned around and took his jacket off the hanger. you were glad his back was facing your way, because that meant he didn’t see the way your jaw had dropped. you shook your head before following him outside, the both of you taking the bus back. jisung’s sudden chatty attitude caught you off guard. he was willingly trying to make conversation with you on the way, breaking the silence every 5 minutes. were you complaining? not one bit.

“i’ll see you next week.” he said, the two of you reaching a point where each could part their own way. you smiled and nodded. “see you next week.” you turned around to walk away, ready to break into a grin.

“oh yeah, (—)?” you heard him call out from behind. you craned your neck to see him hesitate before a small smile formed on his face. “let’s watch where we walk from now on, yeah?”

you went home with the biggest grin on your face.

previous — master list — next

notes ; PROGRESS PROGRESS PROGRESS RAAAAAHHHH

TAGLIST ; @rksbae @222brainrot @severefireangelprune @violetvoo @prdshobi @kikookii @haechansbbg @en-dream @bbxnny-bbxtch @cvpidxo @jaeminslattes @90s-belladonna @softieluvsyou @wenjunblossoms @be0mluver @jeongintwt @myhaechan @love1again @ckline35 @cassie6392 @hibernatinghamster @starboys-gf @rllymark @mfaal @snflwrhaerecs4u @sunflowerbebe07 @ahnneyong @enhalovie @galacticpurpl3 @manooffline @luv4jeno @mikadorbs @1moo7 @ksywoo @ohdudehesflirting @savluvsmingi @finnydraws @invumi @crvzy-fujoshi @peterparkerluvvbot @hrjunluvs @i2kittenz @jisungji @http-peachie @jisyng @sweetcandycum @giaccolo @shotaroswifeyily @sinsgaybutthatsokay @be-my-sunrise @syzavxy @kyusqult @mxlly143 @o-schist @bigjishirt @snuglyjwi @hyunniesvlog @shuaadmirer

[memospacexx]

Forgot to out my thing on MY BAD u can now send requests i think yayaayayay

Disclaimer!! This MIGHT be OOC cause we dont really know much about mammon as of now, when we get more on him i will be updating my general headcanons for him!!!

- initially he js thought you were the one who brought the most money thats why you stood out to him(sure)

- in this scenario I’ll make it so you work under him, managing his sales and making the advertisments n shit or whatever but its up to you wholeheartedly

- a succubus????did u seduce him???😞

- he genuinely started to get hissy whenever anyone talks to you…not that anyone really knew-

-you did not know he saw that. YOU DIDNT KNOW HE EVEN ACKNOWLEDGED YOU

-tbh if he ever put his ego aside and actually asked you out it would be like this:

“Eyyy if it isnt my favorite Succubus!”

favorite?you have NEVER SPOKEN TO HIM BEFORE

“Hello Sir-“

“Drop the sir sweetheart, anyways, i was wonderin if you would accompany me to this fine new restaurant?to discus the..urm sales of course!”

Lie buzzer sound

You thought it was lies but like…u cant really say that to a sin-

“Oh, of course sir it would be an honor” was he fr is this rlly abt that

-Do people know? NO cant risk that-

-However Fizz did find out- walked into you two laughing together, and to fizz, THATS WEIRD…Mammon??being nice??making someone actually laugh without insulting them?? Time to tell ozzie(before he quit)

-also you and fizz get along. I js wanted to point that out, you managed the sales of his robo-self, thats how he found you, he thinks your funny, and when he found out you and mammon were an item he was like

“Are you alright”

“What🤨”

-yeahhh…Ozzie does threaten him with it, like blackmail, but he wouldn’t actually leak that info unless it was an actual must, he knows how it feels 🤷‍♀️

-you two cant exactlyy go on dates, cos of the public, usually you two just watch a movie in his abode🫶🫶🫶

No he wont share popcorn. Get ur own (he will whine if u dont share yours cos he finished his)

If he were to buy gifts he asks his underlings to buy it. They dont question him (he will throw a hissy fit and probably kill them if they ask ngl😭)

Speeking of underlings they hate u lmaoo

They dont like the special treatment u get smh

But they arent mean to you( mammon will kill them💀)

And they refuse to tell anyone cause the fear they have for the sin of greed is INSANE

He made it clear if they gossiped he will indeed set everything they love on fire 😋

-you mention this new dress? Woah its on your (shared) bed

-scrolling thru ur phone and you linger on a specific item? Damn how did that get on your desk

-Favorite food? Say less(he ate it and had to get another but its okay)

But imma explain your job- basically you managed the sales and in-charge of the the advertisement,making sure it reaches the…right audience

And how you met(you didnt meet him when you got the job, someone else was handling it)

How he noticed you was all on accident

(You tripped infront of him . He thought it was the funniest thing for a day then he couldn’t get you out his head for a week)

He bought you VERY high heels as a joke bc of it😭😭😭

Tho a downside of his, in any relationship, doesn’t matter how much he gives and gives, it always feels like he’s taking too. You always have to be there, but not as a lover at times since your relationship isnt public. You have to always be there when hes out, he promoted you so you could be his “secretary “ so he had an excuse to keep you on a tight leash , he might try to isolate you tbh, hes greedy, he wants you all to himself, after arguing w him abt it he doesnt, thankfully, but hes just painfully possesive, but doesnt isolate you from anyone, just demands most of your time is on him

——————————————————

I hope this is to your likingg🫶🫶🫶

@nachowtoast

[half-oz-eddie]

“I’m sorry to do this, Billy, but, effective immediately, you’re fired.”

“Why? What’d I do?!” Billy exclaimed. “It’s almost Christmas! You can’t—“

“We lost a lot of money this year, Billy. You were laid off along with dozens of people. Pick up a severance package from Patty at the desk before you leave, okay? Best of luck to you.”

Billy stormed out of the advertising agency without that shitty severance package. 

He couldn’t afford to lose this job. It sucked enough that the pool was only open during the summer and he needed to pay his way through school with a shitty phone job for an advertising company. But getting fired before Christmas really took the cake. 

He didn’t want his father to find out he was jobless, or else he’d be homeless, so he went to a job agency and was handed an ad for an administrative assistant to a COO at H.H. Enterprises. 

The pay was quintuple his salary at his old job. He didn’t think he had much of a shot with his limited experience and his age, but he completely lost hope when he learned what H.H. actually stood for. 

Hugh Harrington, Steve Harrington’s father. 

It had been 4 years since Billy and Steve even interacted since they fought. It was a brutal night that still haunted Billy, so he assumed it probably still haunted Steve. He expected Steve to be the one to stop him from getting the job he so desperately needed. Rightfully so, Billy believed. 

What made it worse was finding out not only would the COO be interviewing him, Steve was the fucking COO! 

“This is just my luck.” Billy mumbled to himself as he took the elevator to the 19th floor of the office building.

He dreaded the reaction to his face when he entered his office, but all Steve did was smile and offer him a handshake. 

Billy reluctantly shook his hand and accepted the seat across from Steve. 

“So, you worked at that shitty advertising agency, huh?” Steve skimmed through Billy’s very short resume. 

“Uh…yeah, they…let me go the day before yesterday.”

“Jesus. Christmas is in like…3 weeks.”

“I know. They let a bunch of people go and tried to give us baskets as severance packages.”

Steve snickered. “That sounds like something they’d do.”

Billy sighed. “Look, St—" He stopped himself, not wanting to be so informal with a bigshot Chief Operating Officer. They were adults now in the working world, and he was at the bottom of the food chain. "Uh, Mr. Harrington—”

“Oh, god, no." Steve emphatically shook his head. "Please don’t. Mr. Harrington’s my old man. Just call me Steve.”

“Okay. Steve. Listen. I know we don’t have the best history, but I work my ass off and I really need this job—“

“No problem, you got it.”

That was easier than he thought. “A-are you sure?”

“Hey. I’d rather have a familiar face around the office for a change. Between you and me, this place is dreadful.”

“It’s just—after what happened between us…”

“We were…stupid high school seniors. It was nearly half a decade ago. I’m over it.”

If Steve was willing to let go, maybe Billy could finally let go of the pain of that night too.

“So…I got the job? When do I start?”

“Now, I guess.”

“Sure. What do you need me to do?”

Steve sighed. “I’ve never had an assistant to tell what to do before. Not that I wanna...boss you around or anything, I just—“ Steve groaned, resting his head on his desk. “I hate working with my dad.”

“You…want some coffee or something?”

“God, yeah. Coffee—coffee sounds great.”

“How d’you like it?”

“I’m not sure. I don’t really like coffee. Just keeps me from falling asleep. However you make it is fine. Also—got a smoke?”

Billy smirked as he stood. “Always do.”

Billy spent most of his days at work learning about Steve and only helping out when he wanted some coffee or seemed too overwhelmed. 

He was able to pick up on all his body language. He’d file some paperwork when Steve was stressed, take a call when Steve was pinching the bridge of his nose because he had a migraine and offering him a cigarette when a phone call got too irritating because these old partners of Mr. Harrington’s were either hard of hearing or fucking hardheaded. 

Steve never had to say a word when he needed something. Billy was right there by his side whenever he needed his help and support. 

He even offered to massage Steve’s shoulders when he mentioned how awful Steve’s posture was. 

“God, you are amazing.” Steve moaned as Billy worked out the stiffness in his shoulders. “I really needed you.”

“I’m here, pretty boy. You’ve got nothin’ to worry about now.”

“Ah, yeah. That’s nice. Right there.” 

Billy’s hands felt so firm, yet so gentle on Steve’s aching shoulders. He almost wanted to ask him to massage more of his body, but that definitely wasn’t appropriate in the workplace. 

Even though they knew each other. They were still strangers to one another, so Steve was getting to know an entirely new person—someone he found special. 

“That’s perfect, Billy. Thank you.”

For some reason, that massage felt like more than a massage. Steve already missed Billy’s hands as they pulled away from his shoulders. 

“Why don’t we take a break and have some lunch?” Steve offered after typing up exactly one sentence and taking 2 phone calls. 

“Cool.” Billy agreed. “What are you in the mood for?”

“Y’know that donut shop across from Melvald’s? They have the best damn sandwiches I’ve ever had. They make this special mayo for their BLTs…you gotta try it.”

“Yeah? I can go get us some.”

Steve handed Billy some money from his pocket. It was more than enough for sandwiches. “Get some donuts and some hot chocolate too. I’m so damn tired of drinking coffee.”

“Anything else? Want me to stop by Melvad’s and pick up your snacks? Your supply drawer seemed a little empty last time I checked.”

“Please. You know I get moody without my Pringles.”

“I know. That’s why I asked.” Billy smiled. 

“Hey, Billy.”

“Yeah?”

“Do you think I’m good at this job? It’s just—I feel like such an idiot sitting at this desk.”

“You’re doing fine, Steve. You’re damn good at your job. You get your paperwork done on time, your dad’s only been here like—twice to ask you anything and he didn’t even criticize you as much as the first time. You answer all your calls, you show up to all your meetings promptly—“

“Because of you. I do all of that because of you.”

“I’m an assistant, Steve. It’s my job to make sure you’re on the ball. But I’m not in those meetings with those old guys charming them with your ideas. Again. Your ideas. You have a vision for the future of the company.”

“I just…I feel like I’m under a lot of pressure.”

“You are. You’re the COO. It’s a big job. But don’t be so hard on yourself.”

“I’ll try not to be. Thanks again, Billy. For always listening to me complain. I never hear you complain once.”

Billy chuckled. “I just complain about you when I get home.”

“Really?” Steve pouted. “Am I that bad?”

Billy's chuckle turned into a boisterous laugh. “I’m kidding. You’re real easy to work with. I’m glad I got this job.”

“Me too.”

They made endearing eye contact, smizing at one another for what felt like an eternity before Billy cleared his throat and turned away. 

“I’ll um...go grab lunch and your snacks. Be back soon.”

“Don’t take too long. I don’t think I can do this without you.”

“You’re a big boy, Steve. You can survive an hour without me.”

“An hour?!” Steve whined. “I don’t think I can.”

“Jesus, you’re so clingy.” Billy grinned. “I’ll be back as soon as possible. I promise.”

Steve relaxed his shoulders and his face softened into a smile. “Thank you.”

Billy drove to Melvalds and picked up Steve’s favorite snacks. He got 4 rolls of pringles and a pack of Oreos, then ordered their sandwiches, donuts and hot chocolate. 

He wanted to get Steve a Christmas gift, since Christmas was in a few days, but what do you buy a man who has everything? Billy decided to spend the day trying to figure it out. 

When he got off the elevator, he could overhear the muffled sounds of arguing through Steve’s closed office door. 

“I’m not bringing a date to the Christmas Party!”

“Again?! When are you ever gonna meet a nice girl? You can’t keep showing up without a date. You’re 22, almost 23 years old. No spouse, no family. You look pathetic! You used to have all those girls on your arm. What happened?”

“Nothing happened! I just haven’t dated anyone since I broke up with Nancy!”

“You couldn’t even do that right, could you?!”

“She left me for another guy! That isn’t my fault!”

“It’s every bit your fault. You weren’t enough. You never are! You never apply yourself to anything!“

“I’ve been applying myself here!”

“Yeah, for the past couple of weeks, sure. But for months before that, you were falling behind, missing calls, showing up late—“

“Dad. I’m trying to change!”

“…Yeah. You definitely need to.”

Billy stepped back into the elevator, pretending he’d just gotten off on the floor as Mr. Harrington stepped out of Steve’s office. 

“Good afternoon, sir.” Billy greeted with a nod.

“Hello, Billy.” He greeted in a monotonous tone as he entered the elevator.

Billy rushed down the hall to Steve’s office to check on him. 

“Hey, pretty boy. I got your snacks and our lunch!” He said with a big smile, hoping to pick up Steve’s mood.

“Can you believe my dad? He comes here just to berate me about not having a girlfriend, throw Nancy in my face and make me feel like shit.”

“Yeah, I…heard everything. If it makes you feel any better. I don’t think you’re pathetic or that you’re not enough. I think you’re pretty great.”

“So what if I don’t bring a date to the office party? Why does he care about appearances more than his own son?”

“It’s just the kinda guy he is, I guess.” Billy shrugged as he unwrapped Steve’s sandwich and filled his snack drawer. “Eat. We’ve still got another 6 hours ahead of us.”

“I love when you say “we.” Because, Y’know, it’s true. We make a great team.”

“We do, yeah.” 

“It’d be kinda funny if I took you to the Christmas party as my date, yeah?”

Billy took a deep breath. “Uh…wouldn’t your dad hate that? My dad would definitely hate that.”

“Actually, no. My dad doesn’t care. He’s always talking about modernizing and hiring “more queers for diversity” or something like that.” Steve said, making quotation marks with his fingers. 

Billy laughed. “I guess that’s why I’m here.” He said as he took a bite of his sandwich. 

“What?” Steve pointedly glanced up at him. 

“What?” He innocently chewed his food. 

“So then you should definitely be my date!”

“Why so insistent? You queer too?”

“My mom kinda outed me a few months ago. She didn’t know, she just…guessed.”

“How’d your dad react?”

“He said he didn’t think a twink like me would have much luck in the dating pool.”

Billy bursted out into a fit of laughter. “So your dad thinks you're just taking it lying down, huh?"

“I’m not! The two times I’ve been with guys in college, I topped!”

“Oh yeah? Living up to your king Steve persona still?”

“I-it’s just…it works for me, Y’know?” Steve chuckled, obvious blush kissing his face.

“Works for me too.” Billy smirked at him. 

“Can uh…” Steve chuckled. “Can you work overtime tonight?”

“Over, under, from the back…wherever you need me, I’m here.”

“You’re not talking about work, are you?”

“You’re not talking about work either.”

They challenged each other with mischievous glances.

“You still haven’t told me if you’ll accompany me to the Christmas party.”

“Course I will. I’d love nothing more than for Mr. Harrington to think you’re my twink.”

“Oh, fuck you!” Steve chuckled. 

Billy shot Steve the most alluring smile and intense gaze from those ocean blue eyes. “You better.”

[esamastation]

Shizuroth, part sixteen

Previous parts: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen

-

Though Shen Yuan had played Final Fantasy VII and Crisis Core way back when, mostly because emulation was easily available and everyone praised them a lot, he'd never really gotten that into it. He'd sort of missed the hype train, and all the hot takes had already been taken, and Advent Children was kinda weird and overall it just didn't grab him.

But he has to admit that Midgar is a really cool setting.

It's dumb, of course, like, on every logistical level. Oh, look, there's thousands of kilometres of free real estate in every direction to build on, but you know what we should do? A massive fuck off blast plate of million billion tons of metal fifty metres of the ground, that's what we'll do, and we'll build a city in top of it too!

Like, why?! In what realm even remotely attached to sanity does that make sense?! Is there something wrong with the ground, is there an issue of sudden mega floods, or something? No, it's just. A thing they did! 

Logic and sanity aside, though, it's cool, as a videogame setting, it's very cool. With the rule of cool there's no reason for, you know, reason. It's iconic. 

And it's the closest thing to a modern city he's seen in - in a while! And, damn, but the scale of everything in real life is so much bigger than any of the games conveyed.

It's a real city! With real city traffic and bustle and dystopian advertisements everywhere! There's also an ever present haze of pollution that gives all the neon signs a dreamy glow. It's almost pretty.

And it's only powered by the lifeblood of the planet, too. Technically the souls of the dead! Wonderful.

"Please stop gaping at everything like a damned tourist and get in. People are starting to stare."

Sephiroth looks down to the car that had just stopped in front him on the sidewalk. Genesis had told him to get to the front, that he'd meet him there, but…

Genesis has a car. It shouldn't be a surprise, the guy is rich and the city is big, but it is. It's a really nice car too. A fucking oldtimey wine red convertible. It matches Genesis' outfit. How extra can you get?

"... Do I have a car?" Sephiroth asks slowly, rather than point out how ridiculous and in character it is.

"You have a motorcycle you never use," Genesis says, sounding tired. "Get in."

Sephiroth has a motorcycle. Of course he does.

He opens the convertible's side door and is immediately smacked in the face with a mix of nostalgia and incredulity at the old familiar feeling of something so simple as a car door mechanism at his fingertips. The seat is too much in the front for Sephiroth's long legs, but the seat goes back, and that's a familiar feeling too. Kind of.

He always had to pull his seat forward, rather than back.

Swallowing the sudden, long suppressed homesickness for a world he's two transmigrations away from, Sephiroth looks for a seatbelt. There isn't one. Hooray for corporate dystopia.

Genesis joins the four lane traffic in front of the Shinra building with the reckless expertise of a man who drives a lot in the city, and hates it almost as much as he loves his car.

"How far is it?" Sephiroth asks, trying to figure out where to put his hands. It's a really nice car, and it looks polished, inside and out.

He can't believe he's in a car. He can't believe he's in a world with cars again. He also can't believe how badly the games conveyed the scale of Midgar.

"Sector six," Genesis says and glances at him. "You're looking a little green there, are you feeling alright? Don't throw up in my car."

"I'm fine," he's really starting to get sick of saying it. "Stop fussing."

"Who's fussing! I just don't want you to make a mess," Genesis scoffs. "Also you aren't fine. You have amnesia."

Sephiroth snorts and leans his arm on the door, looking away and at the Shinra building.

It's huge, and weird. It sorta bulges out, this lumpy mass of a building with enormous pipes running up to it with a big barrel shape in the middle. It's the biggest building in the city, though - it's the only real skyscraper, towering over all the smaller buildings around it.

After all the metal in the Shinra building, it's weird to see brick and mortar again. Why brick and mortar? What did they run out of steel and concrete building the plate? None of the other buildings go higher than eight levels, too.

"We've covered one thing you remember perfectly. Anything else? You recognized Angeal and me, but how about anything else?" Genesis prods at him. "Hey, are you listening to me?"

Oh, he hates this. At least in Cang Qiong Mountain people were too polite to really pick on him or point out how badly he acted as Shen Qingqiu. They were nice enough to take his bullshit at face value and let it slide. Plus there was propriety to think about - none of his disciples had the standing to really call him out.

Genesis doesn't give a shit about his thin face and actually smacks him on the shoulder, "Hey!"

"What's there to say?" Sephiroth answers, because he has no answers to give. "I wouldn't know what I don't know, would I?"

Genesis sighs, irritated and stalls at the traffic lights. "And I can't tell you what to look up if you don't tell me. You must've figured out something by now."

"I figured I really could've used the day to myself," Sephiroth mutters and watches as a delivery truck advertising pastries runs a red light. "I don't know what you want me to say. I don't know, Genesis."

"Shit," the other SOLDIER says, running a hand through his hair while steering one-handed. 

There's a break in the discussion as they go through a checkpoint, where the guards in infantry uniforms just wave Genesis through. The people on the sidewalk stare at Genesis' convertible, and whisper.

Sephiroth looks away, and then blinks at the dump truck not far away from them, also going through the checkpoint.

Weird - somehow he didn't expect Midgar to have public services. Where do they go to empty them? Do they just dump their trash down the plate?"

"So you remember… nothing?" Genesis asks as they leave the checkpoint behind

"I know - some things," Sephiroth says defensively. "But - the details escape me."

"Things like what?"

"I don't know. You, Angeal. This city. The war. Don't ask me for the president's name, but I know there is one," he sighs and leans back, watching an enormous advertisement for LOVELESS pass them by. 

He also knows that sometime soon Genesis will get hurt and the wound will never heal, kick-starting the plot of Crisis Core. He has no idea when, though. He isn't even sure how to figure it out - the timeline in these games wasn't exactly clear.

"Does Angeal have a student?" he asks.

"What, like a personal student? Not that I know of," Genesis says and glances at him. "Why?"

"Ah, nothing, never mind. Must've been someone else," Sephiroth says smoothly.

So, Zack Fair, the protagonist of Crisis Core, hasn't appeared yet? Or Angeal hasn't met him. Hopefully that means there's still some time.

Genesis is quiet for a moment and then sighs. "I'll get you some intel. Personnel files for people you should know, reports from missions you've been on. The information packages handed to Thirds should help at least a little too. But Sephiroth, there's a lot about your past you've never shared, if someone asks about it…"

"I'll just say I don't want to talk about it," Sephiroth says, watching another neon lit advertisement fly by. "Thanks, Genesis."

"I expect to be compensated in full for my efforts," Genesis says firmly.

Sephiroth leans his cheek on his knuckles and wonders what Cultivation might do for the deterioration Genesis - and Angeal too - have ahead of them. "I'll do my utmost to pay back my debts."

"You better," Genesis says and turns the car from the main highway to a side road, full of expensive looking store fronts and equally expensive looking cars.   "That's it over there. Let me find a place to park and then we can get you a coat that fits."

"Much obliged, Genesis."

[onceuponaoneshotfanfic]

Just Do It

Request: Hi I don’t know if you’re still taking asks and I hate when people ask me stuff when my inbox is closed, but if you are could you please write a Roy Kent x reader with an age gap? That’s literally all I have and I know you touched on it it Superstar and I totally get it if you don’t have time/don’t want to! Love your writing so much and hope your time in Vegas is fun!

Roy Kent x Reader

0.9k words

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, age gap (ages not mentioned, but reader is in their 20s, Roy is early 40s)

A/N: Thanks for the request! I hope you like it ❤️❤️ (also, Vegas was lots of fun, just way too hot for my taste!)

Roy sat in the corner of Ola’s watching you carefully as you chatted with some of the players. You’d been working at Nelson Road for a couple of months now, and he’d fallen hard and fast for you. Of course, people noticed. Rebecca found any reason she could to send you to the coaches’ office. Keeley asked him almost daily if he thought you looked pretty that particular day. Jamie kept leaving Viagra advertisements on his desk. Even Beard gave him a little nudge every time you walked by. It seemed like everyone at the Dog Track knew how he felt except, well, you.

“Watcha lookin’ at Coach?” Jamie stood over Roy, following the older man’s gaze. “Ohhh.”

Roy scowled. “Oh, what?” Roy knew what. He knew exactly what.

Jamie grinned. “Just ask her out already, lad. She’s not gonna say no, I swear.”

“And why is that?” Roy huffed, taking a long swig of his beer.

“Well for one, I bet she was raised to respect her elders.”

A low growl escaped from the depths of Roy’s lungs. “That’s why I’m not going to fucking ask her out. She’s what, like your age? No thanks. I don’t need all the jokes about being old enough to be her dad or asking her to move into a nursing home with me or whatever jokes you’ve been saving in a notebook.”

Jamie shrugged. “I actually write them in the notes app on my phone. Because I’m not an old man.”

“Yeah, you can fucking leave now,” Roy grumbled, giving Jamie a shove.

Before walking away, Jamie called over his shoulder, “Do what Nike says, Coach. Just do it!”

With a grunt, Roy returned to staring at you. His heartbeat stuttered when you looked up from your conversation with Dani to look his way. Something sparkled in your eyes when you caught him staring that made Roy’s throat go dry. It got worse when you got up and walked over to him, plopping your beer on his table, and dropping yourself into the chair across from him.

“How’s it going?” you asked cheerfully, offering him your best smile.

“Not bad,” he mumbled, tapping his own beer bottle. “Yourself?”

You shrugged. “Mostly okay.” There was something almost glum in your expression.

Roy wasn’t used to that; you almost always had a smile on your face. “Fuck’s wrong?”

There was a long moment of the two of you staring at each other, your mouth slightly open, as if you were trying to figure out what to say. Roy’s mind went rapid wondering what it was. Something about a boyfriend? Were you leaving Richmond? Did you know about Roy’s dumb little crush? Did you want him to leave you the fuck alone?

Finally, you let out a sigh. “Right. Um, so I’m going to ask you something, and you’re going to answer, and then we are going to pretend like this conversation never happened. Deal?”

“Depends on the question,” Roy answered, leaning forward.

Your head tilted back and forth, something Roy often saw you do when you were nervous or thinking hard about something. He thought it was fucking adorable, although now it made him nervous.

Your face was beet red as your fingernails scratched the label on your beer bottle. “I just… was wondering why you haven’t asked me out.”

Fuck. Maybe Jamie was right, maybe Roy was just one good scare away from having a fucking heart attack. His jaw slacked a little as he stared at you, not quite sure what to say. But seeing the fear that swam in the eyes he loved to see, he knew he needed to say something.

“What makes you think I was going to?” Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. The way your shoulders slumped told him that this was the absolute wrong thing to say.

“Oh. Shit.” Your eyes screwed shut. “I am so sorry. I completely misinterpreted things. I’m an absolute knob, thinking that you- and I-” When your eyes opened, Roy swore he saw tears. “Like I said, pretend this never happened.” You shot to your feet, a look of absolute humiliation frozen on your face.

Instinctively, Roy grabbed your wrist, gazing up at you, feeling like his stomach was twisting and untwisting over and over. “Too old,” he mumbled, feeling his own face go red now. “Aren’t I?”

To his surprise, you shrugged. “Dunno. I mean, sure, you’re older than me by a bit. But I don’t really care, if I’m being honest. I dunno, I thought that maybe there was… something.”

Roy licked his lips. Like Nike always said- just do it.

“There is,” he admitted. “At least, for me there is. Something there, I mean.” He ducked his head, ignoring the fact that he still held your wrist in his hand. “I fucking like you.”

A smile replaced your somber expression. “Oh really?” You resumed your seat, sliding your arm back so your hand was in his. “Tell me more.”

Roy glanced down at your hands, a small smirk creeping across his face. “How about I tell you somewhere my team isn’t watching us?” He nodded behind you, where Jamie and Dani and the others were staring at you two with great interest, beaming and holding their breaths.

You raised an eyebrow at Roy. “Roy Kent, are you asking if I want to get out of here?”

“Maybe,” he grunted. “I know a decent place to get a drink. What d’you say?”

Keeping hold of his hand, you stood up and nodded towards the door. “I say let’s do it.”

[firstkanaphans]

if i have permission to be a bit of a bitch in your inbox (feel free to ignore this if not), the dichotomy people build between bl and queer media is sooooo fascinating. and of course by that i mean it gives me hives. the universalizing of 'real queer experiences' is obnoxious as hell, but how its been applied to ofts has really shown me why i find it so obnoxious. most of the people who hold this dichotomy would never classify a bl that ignores homophobia as 'authentically queer' media. but i definitely saw people who hoped that the 'authentically queer' ofts would exist in a bubble without any slutshaming, or that it would be resolutely shut down in show. but in my aroallo experience? that would be as inauthentic as the no homophobia bubble, so where does that leave us?

also the circular logic in the bl vs queer media arguments is mind numbing. 'bl doesnt cover these types of themes' yeah dude because you forcibly remove everything with those themes from the bl category in your head. 'queer media must acknowledge homophobia' the idea that a story by queer people about queer characters isnt really queer because it chooses to focus on joy or discovery or any other facet of queer existence is so fucking depressing. go hug a queer friend and think about why you feel queerness is defined by suffering before anything else.

Oh, hey, you found my soap box, Anon! Let me just step on up there with you for a minute.

So, first off, let me just say how much I hate the term “authentically” queer. It seems to suggest that in order to be queer, you have to be queer a certain way. As an ultra femme lesbian, the queer community often makes me feel like I’m not queer enough. That I don’t understand the hardships that come with being gay because I am “straight-passing.” This is the same thing people do to BLs. News flash: if you’re queer, you’re queer. Period. Congratulations, that’s all it takes to be authentic!

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that a large percentage of the people I see using this designation are straight women who think that queer suffering is a necessary part of the queer experience, but a lot of “authentically queer” people—me included—don’t want to be reminded of our real-life suffering every time we turn on the TV. Heartstopper is triggering for me. Bad Buddy is not. As a queer woman currently living in Ron DeSantis’s Florida,  I deserve to be able to turn on the TV every once in a while and not be reminded that there are people in the world who want me dead.

I’ve learned that when people describe a BL as “authentically queer,” what they actually mean is “This BL feels more Western”—the racist insinuation there being that Western media is inherently better.

I feel like The Eclipse is a good example of this hypocrisy. No one has ever called The Eclipse “authentically queer” despite the fact that it delivers one of the most nuanced takes on the dangers of systemic homophobia that I have seen anywhere. The writers of both the source material and the script are gay men. The director is queer. That seems to meet all of the qualifications these people set for “authentically queer” and yet no one has ever questioned that The Eclipse is a BL. Why? Because it incorporates traditionally Asian/yaoi humor tropes such as the pratfall and the accidental kiss. 

Are you sensing a pattern? It’s not the queer-ness of a piece of media that determines whether it is seen as “authentic.” It is its “Western-ness.”

Let me be very clear: All BLs are “authentically queer” media because the only requirement needed for a piece of media to be “authentically” queer is for the characters to be queer. And if you don’t like that, then maybe stop watching BLs.

If the people who were producing these shows had a problem with the term, that would be another discussion, but they don’t. P’Jojo has never advertised Only Friends as anything other than a BL. The fandom did that for him. And with all due respect, if the people making the fucking thing are calling it a BL, then it’s a fucking BL.

So, yeah. Not liking BLs doesn’t make you cool. It makes you a bigot. The fact that the term has become so derogatory is rooted in both racism and misogyny because this was originally a genre created by women, for women, and the hobbies of women are so often infantilized.

BLs are queer media. Die mad about it.

[apostatehamster]

Oh no! Another person's 2 cents on the OFMD finale situation!

Yes, because unfortunately my mind still hasn't settled and is in a state of disbelief over what happened, and I am trying to unravel all of this to make sense of it. Written from the perspective of a sad Izzy fan, so if you do not care to read about that or are simply tired of reading these mind pieces... well don't. And do not bother interacting.

I want to preface this by saying, I do believe Writers should be writing the story they think is right. It is impossible to please everyone so I prefer Author's sticking to their vision rather than bending to the loudest (in most cases, read: displeased) voices of the audience. However, I also think people are entitled to voice their displeasure over writing decisions in a constructive way. I don't condone hate towards authors, actors or anyone involved in the making of the show and if you feel angry enough to send hate or threats, take a walk and calm down instead of being a jerk. That being said, I watched many shows with decisions I did not agree on and few made me as angry & sad as this one, hence me trying to dismantle why.

False marketing, expectations and broken promises

Frankly I hadn't seen much advertising about the show before, most of it was fandom activity that praised the show as feelgood and comfort, with good queer representation. I got into it pretty late, so I can't tell what the show itself presented itself as, but to me it seemed like they fully embraced that image and encouraged the show to be perceived as such. It's a rom-com after all, many laughters and sappy feelings. A safe space-ship for outcasts, so to speak. We expected drama but also making-up and possibly more shenanigans. What we did not expect, was a rather prominently featured character dying as one got used to happening from other shows.

OFMD promised to be different, or at least that was my and many others' impression, and then it turned that around in the last 10 minutes of the finale. But more about that and tonal shifts later.

What baffled me most were the interviews hailing in at the start of season two. I've read articles about how season 2 was leaning into the Ed/Izzy/Stede triangle with David Jenkins saying these three "are on an arc together that’s pretty inseparable". I mean we had Izzy being called a jilted lover before, and in addition to Ed & Stede's love declaration, we also had Izzy declare he had love for Ed, and Ed as well saying He loved him, best he could. There was a lot of love, but it was complicated, and the article gave hope that this season would sort this out.

But after the finale, we got interviews that declared Izzy was a father/mentor figure to Ed, which is such a weird claim that is absolutely unfounded in the way the characters interacted with each other, as well as the fact that Izzy's death apparently was something planned from the beginning as an ending to his arc. And well, I find that death separates characters quite definitely.

I am not saying that Steddyhands was promised to us, gods no, but we were definitely given a chance at it happening, when in fact, the ending had already been written as the complete opposite.

Reception and cognitive dissonance

Every person is different and thus has different feelings and opinions. I've seen Izzy fans hating the finale obviously, I've seen Izzy fans who said they liked it. I've also seen people who weren't explicitly Izzy fans say, they did not like the finale, so really, opinions can go any way.

However what baffled me is Jenkins feeling he delivered a truly happy end. Personally, I've never watched a character die and thought "This makes me happy." I especially would never describe a character struggling through hardship, just to ultimately die as happy or beautiful. I can only imagine that the focus was on Ed and Stede, when a happy ending was mentioned, but Jenkins kept pointing out in the interviews, how Izzy was his favorite, which gave hope for a happy ending for Izzy as well. As much as I enjoy seeing my favorites go through hardships, I also prefer to keep them around by not dying. I especially do not build my favorite up to be a well fleshed out character with growth, just to reduce them back to a plot device for the main character.

I know this is all based upon the interviews, and less on the show, but when I read "And what's the most interesting thing we can do with Con[...]?" my answer definitely wouldn't have been "kill his character off". Con O'Neill does a great job at playing emotional scenes, but we already had him act his heart out in the first three episodes. A last hurrah wasn't needed.

I am also trying to put myself in David Jenkins' shoes here, because I think he truly expected the last episode to be a happy ending, and a gift, just to be proven differently. I just wonder what went wrong, how one can read the room so completely wrong.

It wasn't malicious, but the fact that it was apparently meant to be a genuine attempt at offering a happy end makes it even worse.

Tonal shifts and established in-Show laws

It's an understatement to say that the tone of season 2 was decidedly more dramatic. To the point where I questioned myself if this was still allowed to be called a comedy show. I would have described season 1 as mostly slice-of-life, little adventures between the crew and the captains. People got hanged, fingers severed, people got stabbed, but you never felt the threat of actual death hanging over anyone's head, because everything was kept humorous. (Speaking of the non-baddies here. Calico Jack got a cannon ball to the head but with plausible deniability of his death & (apparently) an interview saying he could be brought back, if needed)

Enter season 2, which starts off with murder attempts, major wounds and a suicide attempt. Nothing was played off as a joke, and for that I am grateful because that would have been in poor taste, but the tone was noticeably different and darker. But it still wasn't 'realistic' by any standard. With no real doctor on board, Izzy should have died from his wounds and comatose Edward would have wasted away in the hidden cabin. Everyone came out (fucked up but) relatively fine.

The show goes back to the humorous tone with Anne & Mary who enjoy a good backstabbing and poisoning. We had our crew surrounded by death and a curse in the next episode, but there was any fear of them coming to harm, obviously. The crew gets boarded and tortured by Ned and his crew after that, but they are able to take it out and come away unscathed (some wounds aside). Oh no! Stede challenges Zheng Yi to a duel! Which we know means no one is allowed to interfere, until one of the duelants dies. But it's fine, Zheng Yi is just playing with her food. But watch out, a Cannonball flies towards Zheng Yi's head! Ah but she is fine, she escaped. The Swede pulled a Rasputin and got immune to poison without him even noticing! Look, even Auntie survived the explosion, badly wounded but she lives. Oh no! Izzy gets shot! But it's his left side, we established no vital organs are there. Roach and Stede are already on their way to get bandage- Wait they are back with no bandages, and Izzy he-

Oh, wait. He...died?

When watching season 2 I legitimately considered Izzy dying as an end result, because I am used to my favorite characters dying, frankly. But then I dismissed that thought because OFMD has proven again and again, that people do not die. Heck, Lucius was considered dead in the season 1 finale and he came back, albeit traumatized. But he lived to tell the tale.

Season 2 finale made it a point to leave no room for doubt that Izzy did indeed die. They dug him a grave, and they panned to his grave at the end to remind you, he is definitely dead. So, why did Izzy have to die in a world where our favorites can survive about anything? "Pirates die, that's just pirate life", okay but why was he specifically singled out to be the only pirate dying? In comparison to everyone else, it feels unjust, and it feels cruel towards the fans who felt safe in the knowledge that this was the one show where none of their favorites would die. And it feels like such a betrayal of the fans’ trust, who had hoped this show would do better.

I've seen a take along the lines of "Nowadays people expect the stories to be written explicitly for them, and then they get upset when it doesn't happen" and that take pissed me off enough to write this down. This isn't a case of entitled fans asking to change the story to be exactly what they want to be, there is fanfiction for that. No, this is fans upset that their favorite character got singled out by the narrative to be the one exception to the no dying rule. And I use the narrative loosely, because there was no ramification to the death that couldn't also have been established by the character staying alive and giving advice, so the death didn't even feel purposeful. And for a show that always stresses the "Talk it through as a crew" point, they did not care much for choosing talking it through as a solution.

I also heartily disagree that Izzy's arc was over and had no more stories to tell. I mean the guy followed Edward around for decades, I would have loved to hear more about their past.

I would have especially loved to hear more about their future, as two people who learned to let go of Blackbeard and became their own people again. Where exactly did the idea of that even come from, I don't know.

Pacing and Confusing decisions in the Final episode and the build-up into nothing

(Rambling alert!) 

Personally I didn't feel any pacing issues until episode 6. While I generally liked the episode, it felt crammed with both set-up of the baddie, fun-times, then appearance of baddie (and disappearance) and return to fun-times. The episode ended and I was literally perplexed that it was over, like we basically ran through that episode. But episode 8 took the cake.

Now I am well aware they had to cut corners, and the strike didn't make it easier either, and I wish we could have seen the result without these factors. But we got what we got now, and I have to judge based upon that, but I really would know how the final cut decision came to be.

I did like the beginning with Ed chilling as a fisherman, but in hindsight I wished they had cut that part a bit shorter to give more room for the final parts. We get a lot of Ricky dicking around the pirate republic, showing Jackie reluctantly bringing them drinks. Later on she finally decides to poison him. Why she didn't do so earlier, I have no idea, unless the show is trying to tell me The Swede had to build up enough poison tolerance within one episode to withstand the poison attempt, which would be ridiculous. Why the Swede was held as an emotional hostage, I don't know either. I don't want him dead but Jackie has many other husbands, the Swede being singled out was more to hurt the viewers than for Jackie imho.

We have Zheng Yi suffering through Stede's presence. Our queen is suffering through the loss of her whole crew and her aunt, while Stede unsympathetically offers that being a failure gets easier. I expected more compassion from a guy who treasures his own crew and also enjoyed the hospitality of Zheng Yi's ship, but okay. Being a dick for the sake of comedy, I suppose. "Thing's have a way of working out. At least for me" And Zheng Yi proves Stede right by killing the soldiers, and Stede claims that went just as planned. I am not sure what happened to the Stede who successfully avoided being backstabbed in episode 5 and defended his crew in episode 6 and actually seemed competent, just to go back to an ignorant fool, but hm.

Fisherman Ed returns, thinks Stede in danger, and recovers his leathers that somehow are still in the same place, after mindlessly killing everyone in his way. Whatever happened to not wanting to be a monster and not killing and running away from that, it doesn't matter anymore. The flashback of pop-pop tells him he needs to go back to what he is good at, and I guess... this is it??? The Kraken rises from the sea again. Will there be consequences for Ed's emotional state after that? Well, no. Not really. Or not in this season anyway.

Okay Ricky invites Izzy to a drink, he's quite obviously a Izzy fanboy. For what reason he took him out of prison, I don't know. He later says "Sad, I wanted to let you live", implying he had plans for Izzy. What those plans were, we will never know, Ricky never tells us. Izzy talks about what piracy means to him. "It's not about getting what you want" and I don't know if he means pirates generally robbing ships to get treasure, or of himself being perceived as a mastermind or being a captain, because he never inclined he wanted either. So, what a weird thing for him to say. "It's about belonging to something when the world has told you, you're nothing" is a beautiful line that makes me wish we had gotten at least some backstory to Izzy. Then we're shown a picture of the crew from season 1.... with Izzy in the background, quite obviously not belonging (yet). What an odd choice to cut into. You could have used something from season 2 that showed him actually belonging

Ed finds one of Stede's love letters, it's cute, but I am not sure why we needed that to somehow reinforce that Ed loves him. We already saw him worry for Stede and literally revert to his Blackbeard persona to set out and save him. He also didn't leave because he didn't love Stede or doubted Stede's love for Ed, but because he needed to find himself first to make it work. It's not a long scene but it took a bit of the momentum of the Kraken rising from the water from me.

Ed and Stede see each other again and we have a callback to the episode one opener. Which was also the moment where I slowly realized, death was in the cards for Izzy because that dream sequence meant his death. But no, this is OFMD, it'll be fine...

We're back in the cell, and our mates are trying to escape. Auntie is there! Very much alive, despite having been on an exploding ship. Who brought her there?? When was she brought there?? How long has she been there and why did no one bother to check the cloaked figure in the corner? NEVERMIND, Auntie is here and alive I suppose. Bleeding out and we've got no supplies to treat her, but she will walk it off just fine.

Captain trio congratulate themselves on beating a bunch of soldiers. Honestly impressive, outnumbered as they were. Mh, maybe they should get back to the crew tho...?

Auntie realizing she was harsh on Zheng Yi and admitting maybe she needs a different approach. I am seeing a parallel to Izzy later admitting his approach was wrong too. Except (and excuse the bitterness) Auntie gets to continue to "mentor" Zheng Yi.

We get a weird hard cut from "I don't do soft" to the talk between Izzy and Ricky. I really thought the talk had been talked, but some more insults get thrown at Ricky, and the deus ex machina happens as all prisoners are freed from prison, the captain trio arrives and all soldiers die of poisoning. Personally this was the moment where I had to slow blink in disbelief, because everything was happening so fast.

Stede talks about how they need a plan, and how a royal hostage could prove valuable. Another hard cut "SO, that's the plan". We do not hear the plan. We just gather from the following montage that it has to do with dressing up as English soldiers. We get a montage of everyone preparing for battle and dressing up, looking cool in slow motion. And, they did look hella cool, but there was so much buildup for them dressing up for the plan...without knowing what the plan even IS.

And then the plan apparently is.... just Izzy holding Ricky hostage? And the rest waits around and sees how it plays out? And they're just trusting Ricky to go along with their plan and say what they want him to say? Why was Izzy the one who had to hold Ricky hostage? The one person with a visible wooden leg? Not sure if peg-legs are an established pirate thing in this world, but the British seem to think so, because they look down at it. Why did no one check that Ricky had no weapons on him beforehand? And most importantly, where the fuck was Stede during this suicide plan? He is the one who planned it, yet he was nowhere around the group with Ricky, nor did he fight any Soldiers. He only reappears when everyone is running away. What the hell!! Where'd he fuck off to. Again, all this epic plan build up, for the barely existing plan to go up in shambles within 5 seconds, and then they all run. At this point they could have just left Ricky at the Inn and attempted to walk to the ship safely in disguise without ever drawing attention to the soldiers, and they would have had as much chance.

Ed asks Izzy if he is okay and I raise an eyebrow, A) because we as the viewers barely saw him get hit and B) Ed hasn't cared much about Izzy after Stede returns. But okay, we're stumbling back to the ship, surprisingly no one else gets shot.

Izzy is bleeding out on the ship, Stede and Roach run off to get bandages. "Bonnet is in charge, oh great I am fucked" is a true statement, considering Stede was in charge with the plan already and got Izzy to here. Later you hear footsteps approaching offscreen, which I guess were Stede and Roach. They just appear again, with no bandages and no comment. I don't want to get into detail how much I despise Izzy's parting words, and the message they send out, but Izzy throughout this season proved he wanted to live and got ready for living again, just to end up saying he wants to go here, and it's just so utterly wrong. This scene was presented as someone who was healed and now got to die amongst his loved ones, but he was not healed. He practically still believed he deserved what he got, and he died believing Ed did not need him and thus he was unnecessary. If he truly was healed, he would fight to live, if not for himself and his new found family, then for Ed who he still loves, but no. Okay maybe I did want to go into detail, but anyway, many have said it better than me already.

The crew who bonded with Izzy over the whole season stands mutely in the background, leaving the stage to Ed, who has barely cared about Izzy all season. Out of nothing I am supposed to believe Izzy means something to him, after Ed shot him down, discarded of him, happily mentioned to Frenchie that "But most importantly, no more Izzy" like Izzy had been the bane of his existence, the guy he didn't even have the balls to approach first to apologize but instead mocked Izzy when Izzy himself finally broke their silence, I am supposed to believe that Edward suddenly realizes Izzy's worth and that he deserves to be the one grieving, not leaving any space to the crew? I don't think so.

All season I was waiting for them to make up again, patiently, full of hope, but the remaining episodes got less and less. And I held out hope for them to bond over talks and teamwork, remembering how well they worked together before it turned sour, acknowledging that they could do better if they tried, but instead we got this. This is supposed to help Edward move on as Not Blackbeard, but Izzy had already encouraged Ed to not be Blackbeard, yet Ed came back deciding on his own to don his leather outfit again. This is such a back and forth, it's frustrating. They could have accomplished growth without a death, but I've already talked about that.

Also Izzy telling Ed has family now, because the crew loves him. Ed bonded exactly with one person outside of Stede, and that was Fang, who was once Blackbeard's crew anyway. Other than that Ed only hung back and did not give a shit about what the crew was doing, but sure they love him after the non-pology. Where were the scenes to back this claim up, it was utter nonsense.

Okay, we get a burial. No one says a thing, no one's got to say a thing about their unicorn. Everyone leaves, and "That's that then". Stede talks about Izzy, like he hasn't personally bonded with Izzy over the last episodes and like he was simply a guy Ed dragged along (the way season 1 Stede would have felt). Also, no acknowledgement that Stede's plan was what got Izzy killed whatsoever, no remorse.

Aye no time to be sad, we got a wedding now! It lasts less than a minute screen time, and I am still recovering from the emotional impact of a death scene + burial, maybe give me a minute so I can feel happy for LuPete? No? okay.

Stede and Ed decide to build an Inn, nothing either of them has experience in. Also the "family" Izzy promised Ed is sailing away, so that was for nothing as well. What happened to Stede wanting to be a pirate? What happened to Ed returning to being a pirate, because it's what he's good at? What exactly made them change opinions to leave their crew behind and start this? *lame hand gesture at Izzy's grave* This?? I am usually good at looking for clues and details and figuring stuff out in between the lines, but I am left clueless as to what inspired this.

I am 100% sure there were missing scenes that could have helped soften the blow of the death at least, but like this the episode feels jarringly badly patched together. There is no visible impact to the death that would explain the necessity to the narrative (and yes, we are in a story, not real life. Plot points happen because they bring the narrative along, and it didn't here) With everything established beforehand, it felt like the death got shoehorned in, simply because someone said "I want this character to be dead at the end of the season", and then a story was somehow built around this.

And of course people are upset about this, when I watched I thought it was a joke and I was waiting for the little wink telling me it's not what it seems. The theme I gathered from this season was "belonging", and to see the guy accepting that he belonged and deserved to be loved to be left behind and denied a chance to continue with the crew where he BELONGS, because he's dead and gone, is a very stupid choice.

The season had many unexplained and unresolved things that I chose to overlook because the show was still ongoing and I had hoped they would all work out in the end, but they didn't and this sours the whole experience.

Fandom

This has less to do with me unraveling the happenings of the show, but whatever.

I joined very late, a few weeks before season 2 aired. I was however vaguely aware that Izzy was controversial to the fandom and that fans got hate mail for liking the character who "broke the main couple apart". So going into the new season as someone who utterly loved Izzy in season 1, I was skeptical lol

But it was a nice experience. Season 2 showed parts of Izzy that I had already seen but in a way that made it clear to everyone that this guy has Emotional Layers TM and is capable of more than just being the guy throwing a hissy fit. Everyone could sympathize with him, people enjoyed seeing him, and I legit loved going through the tags of the gifsets and reading all the reactions.

Generally I loved seeing the reactions after every new episode, seeing how fandom came together to talk over what happened, and over what they enjoyed. I had expected a very split fandom but it seemed season 2 was somewhat gluing it together. Izzy was finally an "accepted" character and thus it was "okay" now to love him, now that he wasn't trying to break Ed/Stede apart either. The show was feeding fans too, I felt like I feasted every episode up until the finale happened.

And /then/ the finale happened and the illusion went away.

Up to then I thought this was a season for the Izzy fans, with the opener episode showing how ridiculous the take of "Izzy has to die for Ed/Stede to be happy" was in a mocking dream episode, I thought that was David Jenkins acknowledging the hate that has been sent in the direction of Izzy & his fans, and how it's Not That Easy. And then he proved Izzy was more than that.

And then he killed Izzy off, so Ed/Stede could be happy and we've come full circle again.

Of course Izzy fans were upset, because it felt like a final fuck you after a season full of promises that it would be okay, and of course people were voicing their displeasure and sadness over it. Some people were downright grieving the character, and I can tell you I Am People. I went through the 5 stages of grief, through bargaining and anger directly after the finale, sadness the whole day after, crying over it because it felt so unjust to me. And maybe these reactions seem extreme to you, but that does not mean that people aren't feeling awful about the finale, that it truly hurt them. And you do not get to mock people for feeling in pain. What do you gain from that? If you liked the finale, fine, everyone is different, but allow the people who were shaken by it to express their emotions. Processing emotions takes time, and as a part of this I wrote a goddamn essay to make peace. The least you could do is not be a dick.

Parting thoughts are that the final episode was both a product of unfortunate cuts in screen time, and a writer who didn't expect the effect it would have on the audience.

I am not hating on David Jenkins, I loved every other episode of the season and eagerly anticipated the next one, but I am so incredibly sad that one botched finale broke my trust into the show, soured my love for the previous episodes with the knowledge of what it all built up to, and left the fandom back in shambles.

So long, and be kind to each other.

[doe-eyed-fool]

Fallen {Chapter Eight}

Alastor x (fem)Reader

"I was also thinking we could add some gaming consoles. Just if you get some younger sinners coming through. Doesn't have to be all new, some people like older systems too." I say to Charlie. She was writing some of the ideas I had down as she listened.

So far, I had suggested a television with some movies to go along with it. As well as a Bluetooth speaker for playing music, and some board games. And it wouldn't hurt to add video games as well. "I think I can get my hands on some of those." Charlie says with a smile.

 "Any other ideas?" She asks. "Well, I did have an idea for advertisement. But first I have to ask, why haven't you created a build board yet?" I guess it would make sense for the city like aesthetics of hell would have build boards too. And I've seen tons. Advertising all sorts of things, even admittedly some pretty silly and downright stupid things.

"Well, it's not like I haven't tried." Charlie laughs weakly. "As you can imagine, no one is really taking my idea seriously. So, there's that. Also, there's a ton of people ahead of me trying to get one."

"But aren't you the princess of hell? Can't you just...you know? Make them bump you up to the front?" I ask. "Nah, I don't want to have to do that." Charlie shrugs. "I wanna try and do this my own way, without abusing my power. I've only had to do it once, and that was when Alastor showed up to the hotel. I had to convince him to not pull any stunts behind my back and to basically play nice with the people checking in." She explains.

"I guess even he has to listen to you." I say with a slight smile. "Eh, yeah. But it's like pulling teeth." Charlie sighs. "I believe you." I sigh as well. Charlie eyes me for a second before speaking again.

 "You said Alastor helped you find your way here from a bad spot. But how exactly did that happen? He isn't the most...friendly(?) of people." I felt a twinge of panic surge through me at that question. Though, I had a feeling the question would come up eventually. But I had hoped I'd never have to be the one to answer it.

"Um yeah...I was in bad shape when I landed in hell." I began, trying to make this as convincing as possible. "I was really injured and he helped me. Then he mentioned this place and brought me here. I uh...really want to go to heaven. And when he said there was a place to help me get there, I jumped at the chance."

"I see." Charlie nods. "I guess I'm still just a little shocked that he of all people offered to help someone out. He didn't try and trick you or anything...right?" She leans a little closer to me as she whispered. I smile as best as I could and shook my head. "Nope. I came here of my own will." Charlie leans back. "Huh. Ok. Maybe this place is rubbing off on him after all." She says, her smile returning. 

"Though, I have a feeling he'd deny it if I told him that." She chuckled. "Well, if you can't get a build board right now. Maybe stick to posting the hotel online? Maybe make an account just for the hotel and it's amenities?" Charlie takes out her phone.

"I've tried that. But there's not many followers, and the attention the hotel does get is mostly from troll accounts and overall dickheads." She says as she shows me the phone. She opened up an app called Sinstagram...uh, clever? And scrolled down to the comments under the photos.

And just as she said, it was filled with crude, hateful, and downright inappropriate comments. Very little people were taking it seriously.

"Oh, I see." I mutter. "I know you said you didn't want to use your status to get your way. But, I was thinking maybe use that kind of power in a good light." Charlie gave me a confused look, she stayed quiet, letting me explain further.

"Why not throw a ball and invite some persuasive people? Maybe the overlords? They seem pretty important. You could pitch the hotel to them personally, and if you can catch their interest, they're bound to talk about it." Charlie leaned back and hummed. 

"I do like the idea of a ball but...I don't know, the overlords never expressed any interest in the hotel. Besides, most if not all of them gain from people's sins. Especially in the entertainment industry, like Val and Vox. Those two are unstoppable when it comes to providing for the sinners in hell. Of course, they don't topple over the deadly sins themselves but uh..." Charlie trailed off when she noticed how lost I was.

She cleared her throat. "But, it wouldn't hurt to try...right?" She smiles weakly. I could only nod, matching the grin.

I did feel for her. Starting a project that you're very passionate about, only to be met with hate and dismissive comments has to sting. It seemed like even her own father didn't care about her dream. I wish there was something more I could do to help her.

"Hey, how about those new curtains huh?" I say, trying to brighten the mood. Charlie and I looked towards the large windows, the fancy velvet red curtains that accompanied them. For the past few days, the hotel has gotten a bit of a fixer upper. 

New furniture, wallpaper, and lighting had been installed into the hotel. We even gave the outside a good polishing, thanks to Alastor's help that is. Otherwise it would have taken much longer. And now with a new common room with various forms of entertainment on the way, the hotel was looking better with every passing day.

If it's one thing people could say about the hotel, that wasn't completely bashing or berating it, was that it looked aesthetically pleasing.

"If you did throw a ball, the look of the hotel will surely impress them!" I try to cheer her up. Charlie looked around before turning her attention back to me. "Ah, what the hell? Let's throw a ball." She says with a shrug. "I can't let the what if's get in my way. I won't! I will throw a ball, I will invite those uptight asshole overlords, and my parents! And I'm gonna show them just how effective this hotel can and will be!" I smile at her determination.

After getting to know Charlie, I've learned that she was all but willing to give up. Especially when it came to something she really cared about. And she certainly did care about this hotel. "I hope all goes well." I tell her. "You have a good heart Charlie. I want you to succeed." Charlie smiled warmly before hugging me. "Thanks Y/n."

I hug her back, and shortly after we parted. "Alright." Charlie nods. "I have a lot of planning to do. I'll catch you later, ok?" I nod my head and waved before she hurried off. Suddenly, a pang of anxiety hit me. And it was then I realized, I had never been to a ball before. Of course I hadn't. I mean, I haven't even been to a large party before. "Uh oh." I mutter.

"Something the matter?"

Ah yes. That's something I've gotten use to. Alastor's sudden voice in my ears have became somewhat normal to me over the past few days. I sigh before speaking. "Yes."

What followed was Alastor's breathy laughter that only stopped when he suddenly appeared beside of me. "Let me guess, it's about the ball that the princess is planning? Never had much experience mingling with important figures, I take it?" He asks smugly.

 "How did you guess?" I roll my eyes. "I'm kind of regretting giving her the idea now. Gosh...the overlords scare me enough. But Lucifer and Lilith being there...I think my heart's going to explode."

"Oh, try not let it. The heart is the best part, wouldn't want it to go to waste." I sent him a glare. "Very funny. Im serious."

"So am I."

I groan in annoyance before turning to face him. "I mean it. Im gonna make a fool of myself. Maybe I'll just fake being sick that day." I say with a sigh. "Nonsense! You'll do just fine." Alastor waved his hand dismissively. "Everyone at the hotel will be there, so you'll be around some familiar faces at least." He tells me. And admittedly, that did bring me some comfort.

I hadn't known these people well, but it was better than not knowing them at all. I got along pretty well with Charlie, but I am certain she'll be busy with the overlords and her parents at the ball. But surprisingly, me and Angel Dust had gotten along as well. 

Despite his rather...perverted and lewd behavior, he was actually pretty decent to talk to. And, I also felt a little sorry for him. From context, his boss seemed like a rather cruel and unforgiving guy. Abusive even. Angel's line of work was already tough and dangerous enough. To have a boss like that on top of it all...It must be exhausting.

But even with the somewhat comfort of knowing they would be there wasn't quite enough to convince me. "I don't even have a dress. I can't go to such a fancy event like this." I say, gesturing to my outfit. It wasn't terrible, but it most certainly wasn't ball wear. Causal, is the best way I could describe it.

"Then perhaps you should buy one." Alastor suggests. "With what money?" I counter. "Also I don't know any shops around here to even get a dress. I really think I should just skip out on the ball. Those types of things aren't for me anyway."

"Im sure Charlie would want you there. You're the newest guest in the hotel after all. It'd be strange if you didn't show up." Alastor says with a smirk, knowing he was right. I frowned deeply. I hate that he was right. "Fine I'll go." I say, defeated. "Wonderful! Now, come along." Alastor walks ahead of me.

"Where?" I hesitate before following after. "We're getting you a dress. Not to any shops around here of course. No no, we're going to proper shop for your dress. And I know just the place!" I stop in my tracks. "I already said I didn't have any money." I try to argue.

"Consider it a gift, from me to you." Says Alastor, a hint of false kindness in his tone. I narrow my eyes. No way. He'll want something in return for sure. I cross my arms, still not moving an inch. "What's the catch?" I ask.

"No catch." Alastor says simply. "I don't believe you." I mutter. Alastor only chuckled before snapping his fingers. Before I knew it, we were in front of a store. A big, fancy, expensive looking store. "Alastor!" I snap my head up at him. "After you." Alastor says, opening the door for me. Realizing there was nothing I could do to change his mind, I sigh and walk inside.

The clothes inside of the store looked just as fancy as the store. Soft music played in the background, it being the only noise in the otherwise quiet store. "Feel free to look around." Alastor tell me. I repressed the urge to shoot him a glare before walking further into the store. I didn't even know where to begin. Well, other than finding the women's section that is. "I guess...I just find the best looking one?"

"Or. You could look for one you like?" Says Alastor. "I mean yeah but. Shouldn't it be really fancy and elegant?" I ask him. "The king of hell is going to be there." Alastor looked at the dresses in front of me, he bummed before shuffling through a few. Then he pulled out a red and black dress.

It wasn't what I was use to, but I had to admit, it was a very beautiful dress. And conveniently was backless, perfect for my wings to fit through. "What do you think of this one? Elegant enough for you?" Alastor asks. I had to tear my eyes away from the dress to look at him. "Um, yes. I think that one is fine." I tell him.

He then hands the dress to me before leading me to the fitting rooms. "Go ahead and try it on then. See if we need to make any adjustments." I nod before walking inside one of the stalls and shutting the door behind me. After changing, I turn to the full length mirror behind me. 

To my surprise, I was left in awe at the sight of myself. My new form seemed to have complimented the dress wonderfully. I was actually taken back by how nice I looked. "Almost done?" I could hear Alastor call from the other side of the door.

"I am." I say before opening the door and stepping out. If I blinked, I would have missed how Alastor's brows shot up for a brief moment, before returning to normal. "My, how lovely!" He compliments. "I say it suits you quite well. But what about you? Too tight or loose in any areas?" He asks. I shake my head and look down at myself. "No, it fits pretty well. It's shocking comfortable too."

"Well then, let's check out." Alastor guides me to the register. The cashier politely greeted us, but quick to cower in fear as they noticed Alastor. They rang up the dress, eyes darting from the register to Alastor, as if waiting for him to lunge.

When I heard how much the dress was worth, my jaw nearly dropped to the floor. "Al-" I didn't get a word out before Alastor bought the dress and escorted me out of the shop. As we left, I could hear the cashier sigh in relief.

What just happened?

(I published chapter eight too cause I got hit with a wave of motivation! Chapter nine and ten are in the works!)