#ok yeah its ugly but. well.

[yaboisnelf]

im so tired. have dickroy sketches cus i havent posted in 2 months. i wont post again ❤️ when i do itll have duke prommy

[perenlop]

i wont post every single edit i made to my pmd oc refs but im happy with asha’s quite a bit so ill post that

(old is top new is bottom)

[chisatowo]

Yknow I rly hope Rui and Rinko get an event together in the near future. I feel like there's just a lot of interesting things that could be explored between them in regards to their childhood, and now that Rui has grown a lil bit I think it'd be nice to either have them actively talk abt it with maybe some flashbacks or smth, or even just have them hang out and move forward from past awkwardness. Either way, I think it'd be a good sort of event for both of them and considering its already been so long with just above nothing for them I think they could rly use it

[cinnabeat]

can u believe i actually managed to save enough crystals for two ten pulls this event and yet managed to get nothing

[msgexymunson]

"Uh, excuse me, I have a job for you."

*Eddie gestures to The Goods*

😏

God why do I have a full blown mental image. Oh and of course, smut ensues. 😅

Warnings: oral male receiving, allusions to fem oral, established relationship.

"Oh, and what am I supposed to do with that?" You ask, curling an eyebrow, but there's a hint of mischief behind your eyes.

"Well, you're not feeling great and you always say you feel better when you entertain for Eddie Jr and the Goblins-"

"The Goblins??" You giggle, hand forming over your mouth to hide your amusement.

"Yeah, the Goblins. Ugly, wrinkly, live in the underdark?" He shrugs with wide eyes, as if this is stated fact.

The laugh that expels from your chest can no longer be hidden, ringing out long and loud. To Eddie's absolute amazement and joy, you fall to your knees.

"So, Eddie Jr's been missing me? And his little Goblins need some attention too, huh?" Small fingers run up Eddie's fly, locating the zip to pull it down with exaggerated slowness.

Eddie's next words are stuttered at best.

"Y-yeah, I-I mean, o-of course, fuck... but th-they ain't little."

Chuckling as you shuffle his jeans and boxers midway down his toned thighs, your firm palms drag up his exposed skin, relishing in the shake that takes over his legs.

"Of course not. Big, manly goblins."

As if to accentuate your point, you roll one of his heavy balls inbetween your lips, tongue circling it wetly.

"O-oh holy- fuck, sweetheart!"

"I thought they were-"

"OK, OK, just- please-"

Smiling and palming his length, you lick his tip, gathering the small pearl of pre cum, the taste exploding on your tongue.

"Aah, yeah, take it princess."

Happy to oblige, you envelop the whole of him into your warm wet mouth, gagging slightly when it hits the back of your throat. Working the moistened shaft with one hand, you swallow around him, revelling in the feel of his throbbing length in your mouth. Its oddly conforting; a distraction to keep you mindful and grounded in the here and now. He feels warm and solid, pulsating with need so violently that it cries for you. A salty, coagulation of a tear; hitting your throat with the tang of requirement.

"Fuck, sweetheart, th-thats, oh fuck, you're so warm-"

Humming in response, you take him deep; as deep as you can go. Swallowing around him again and again, you roll his balls in your soft hands to coax him to completion.

You don't have long to wait.

"Sweetheart, oh holy hell I'm gonna- shiiit-"

Chuckling with him stuffed inside your mouth proves too much for Eddie. With a final shudder he explodes onto your waiting tongue, flooding each sense with his release.

You suck, and suck, until he blindly yanks you off of him with tears springing to the corners of his eyes.

"Job well done?" You ask cockily, the smug grin smeared all over. Until, he speaks.

"Yes. Now, its your turn. Lie back."

Oh shit.

[avid-adoxography]

I'm having the worst of weekends rn, I need any of my F/Os to body press me like a panini until they squeeze all my anxiety outta me. Or break my spine and put me out of misery. Both is good :')

[marvelfanfn2187a113]

Fight Club, part 2

Team Free Will & Winchester!reader

Requested by anonymous

Synopsis: team free will thinks you started up your fight club again; is it true?

Sam knew something was wrong the moment you brushed past him in the hallway of the bunker. You’d just returned from school, and absolute silence replaced your normal cheery greeting.

Before he could even get a word out, you were in your room with the door closed.

…

“Hey, did you see Y/N?” Dean asked Sam as he entered the bunker. “She didn’t say a word all the way home, and she wouldn’t even look at me.”

“She just rushed past me. She’s in her room now,” Sam answered. “Should we talk to her?”

“Something’s up,” Dean decided. “I’m going in there.”

“What?” Came your harsh response as Dean knocked.

“Kid? It’s us, can we come in?”

There was silence for a minute on the other end, then some rustling, before your lock clicked and your door opened just a crack.

“What do you want?” You asked hesitantly, your head ducked low.

“Well, some eye contact for starters,” Dean huffed.

“Then you’re in the wrong room,” you sighed, moving to close the door.

“Hey, hey.” Sam stuck his foot in the door, reaching up and grabbing onto its edge. “C’mon, this is ridiculous. Let us in.”

“Fine.” You relinquished your hold on the door, finally lifting your head. “Is this what you wanted to see?”

The skin surrounding your eye was a deep, ugly purple splotched with green.

“Jeez, kid,” Dean breathed, gently gripping your chin between his fingers and tilting your head to get a better look. “What happened?”

At your silence, Sam frowned.

“Y/N, not again.”

“What?” Dean asked.

“She started up fight club again, right?” Sam demanded. “Only this time you lost.”

“I didn’t!” You insisted.

“Right,” Dean huffed. At this, you stopped.

“So, what, guilty until proven innocent? Screw that,” you scoffed, pushing past your brothers and running out of the room.

“Hey!” Sam called after you, but his plea went ignored.

Dean groaned.

“Well that went well.”

…

“Sammy, I found her!” Dean called from the garage, where you were curled up in the back of the Impala. You looked up at his outburst, and turned so that you weren’t facing him.

Dean opened the back seat just as Sam entered the garage.

“Hey kiddo,” Dean greeted. “So, that didn’t go so well I guess. You wanna tell us what happened?”

“Why?” You choked out, and Dean suddenly knew why you didn’t want to look at him. “You won’t believe me.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that, ok? I’ll believe you,” Dean promised.

“Yeah, we promise,” Sam piped up.

“There’s…” you swallowed hard. “There’s this new guy at school. Big, angry. I-I guess I pissed him off.”

“He hit you?” Dean’s blood began to boil.

“I just bumped into him, I-I wasn’t watching where I was going,” you continued, your voice thick and your back still turned to your brothers. “I didn’t mean to.”

“We’re not blaming you,” Sam assured you. “We just want to know.”

“I couldn’t fight back,” you whimpered. “He-he got on the football team, and some-some of his teammates held me down so he could hit me.” You curled in on yourself as you spoke.

“Honey,” Dean breathed, tugging on your arm and turning you to face him. “Commere.” He pulled you into his arms, his hand coming up to cradle your head as you finally began to cry.

“I-I promised not to fight, and I wanted to keep it,” you cried. “I didn’t mean to—“

“Shh, shh, hey,” Sam soothed, rubbing your back. “It’s ok sweetheart, this isn’t your fault.”

Sam could sense Dean’s anger boiling over.

“We gotta do something about this,” he hissed through clenched teeth.

“I’ll call the school,” Sam said.

“But—“

“And you can take Y/N upstairs and get her cleaned up,” Sam interrupted. The last thing he needed was for Dean to blow up at the school officials.

“Fine,” Dean huffed, lifting you into his arms and carrying you into his room. He snatched a rag off his desk and disappeared into the bathroom, coming back a minute later with it soaking wet. “Tilt your head up,” he instructed, and when you obeyed he dabbed at your eye with the rag.

You hissed in pain, and he retreated his hand for a second.

“Sorry kid, we’ll get you some ice in a second,” he said.

“I really tried not to fight,” you mumbled.

“Kid, stop explaining,” Dean huffed. “I’m not blaming you, ok? In fact, all I wanna do right now is go down to that jerk’s house and teach him a lesson. Unfortunately, he’s a kid.”

“Do you think I should’ve fought back?” You asked meekly.

“With half the football team on you?” Dean scoffed. “Kid, I want you to protect yourself, but there are some battles even a Winchester can’t win, ok?” He ruffled your hair. “Now c’mon, let’s get you an ice pack.”

You smiled and shuffled behind your big brother to the kitchen.

“I’m sorry I didn’t believe you,” he said after a minute.

“That’s ok.”

“Sammy’s gonna take care of this, ok? That guy won’t get away with it.”

“I know,” you said with a smile before leaning forward and wrapping your arms around Dean. “Thanks.”

Dean chuckled softly and patted your shoulder.

“Any time, little sister.”

[forays-into-fiction]

I Hate You... But Not Really

Eddie and you have been best friends for as long as you can remember and you’ve been crushing on him for about as long. He starts dating Chrissy however and jealousy rears its ugly head for both you and Jason. Jason has the bright idea to “date” each other to make them jealous instead. Nothing goes as planned... or does it?

Request fill for Anon, hope you like it... this one ended up being very long lol.

Minors DNI

Contains: Fake Dating/Fake Relationship (Jason/Reader), Eddie/Reader, Eddie/Chrissy, Jason/Chrissy, Bestfriend!Eddie, Virgin!Reader, A Little Bit of Angst, Loss of Virginity, Protected Sex 

You had decided to take lunch in the library today, curling up with a book instead. It wasn’t that unusual for you to skip lunch and hang out in the library, you had to get away from the rowdy Hellfire boys and their antics every now and then.

However, since Eddie had started dating Chrissy, you’d spent more and more time in the library rather than be subjected to their lovey-dovey nonsense. If you had to see them, make goo-goo eyes at each other one more time you might actually explode. 

God forbid she ever showed up at a Hellfire session you’d up and leave the club if that ever happened. You were trying to be happy for him, happy that he was happy, but it was hard when they just had to go and rub it in your face.

That’s where he finds you, tucked away in a corner reading quietly when he breaks the silence.

“y/l/n!” He whisper-yells as he approaches you.

“What is it, Carver? I’m not in the mood for your shit today.” His presence only serves to worsen your sour mood.

“Ok, since when did you get so sassy?”

“Fuck off, I told you I’m not in the mood. What?”

“Well, I’m… I’ve come with a proposal of sorts…” he drawls.

“Jesus Christ, get to the point.” You huff.

“Look, I know we’ve had our differences…” You scoff, he continues, “…but I think we’re both in the same little predicament.”

“Oh, yeah and what’s that?”

“You know Chrissy left me for the Freak-.”

“Hey, don’t call him that!” You can’t help but defend him, even now when you’re mad at him.

“Ok, for… Munson, and it’s kinda obvious the way you pine over him.”

“I DO NOT ‘pine’. You’ve had that same stupid joke since we were ten get over it, Eddie and I are just friends.”

“But that’s not what you want is it? You want it to be more than that and I want Chrissy to take me back, so…”

“So, what…? I’m not following.”

“Geez and I thought you were the smart one. We make them angry, jealous… we date each other to rile them up.”

“God that has to be the stupidest plan I’ve ever heard. I’m not dating you, Carver.”

“Well, you wouldn’t be… not really anyway. We’d just pretend long enough to each get what we want.”

“And why exactly would either of them even care?”

“I don’t know what’s going on with Chrissy that she’d leave me and especially for that…” You give him a warning glare, he continues, “…for him, but I know she doesn’t really love him. She loves me, I love her we… we had plans to get married-”

“Oh, wow that is pathetic, marriage? You’re fucking eighteen get over yourself. Maybe that’s why she left you.”

“No, it’s not, it was her idea actually… that doesn’t matter. Anyway, I’ve seen the way Munson looks at you, he’s got feelings for you even if he won’t admit it.”

“So, what? How would that even work?”

“We go on ‘dates’, get seen together doing couple-y shit, see how they react and go from there I guess.”

“Ok, but what ‘couple-y shit’ are we talking about here, cause I’m not fucking sleeping with you.”

“Jesus, I never said you would! It’s not like I’d want to either. I dunno like the normal stuff, holding hands, maybe some kissing that kind of thing.”

“I’m gonna need a whole lot more outta this than ‘Eddie might have feelings’ for me to do anything with you.”

“Am I really that bad?”

“Yes actually, you are.”

“Fine, I’ll pay you.”

“Eww you creep. I don’t want your money.”

“Then what will it take?”

You ponder for a moment before answering, what would it take? You reach a decision, “You have to be nicer to all the Hellfire guys from now on. Or at least civil with us, even after you get Chrissy back.”  

“Ok, but what about if Munson tries to start shit?”

“Then you ignore him, be the bigger man or whatever.”

“Alright fine.” He concedes.

“Fine.” You huff back in response.

“So, like do you want to set up a schedule or something?”

You glance at the clock on the wall, “Look, lunch is almost over why don’t we just meet up on the weekend and sort out the details then…”

You reach into your backpack, pulling out a notebook and pen you scrawl across a page before tearing it out, “… here is my address, just come past around noon.”

He takes the slip of paper folding it and placing it in his back pocket, “Sure, I’ll see you then.”

He turns and saunters off while you pack away your belongings and begin heading to your next class.

He stands on your front porch and jabs at the doorbell, you’re not too far off and answer quite quickly.

“Y/l/n.” He nods his head in greeting.

“We’re going to at least have to call each other by our first names, you know?” You usher him inside, lingering in the front hall.

“Right, yeah that’s true. Ummm, do we… do we use pet names too or…?”

You shrug, continuing as you lead him through to the living room, “I mean maybe… that is something couples do.”

He looks around taking in his surroundings, “Your parents home?”

“No. No, they’ve gone out for lunch with some friends. So, take a seat I guess and let’s get to… whatever the hell this is.” You gesture to the couch.

He does so more awkwardly than you would’ve expected from him, was he nervous? No that couldn’t be it, not Mr. Cocksure Big-shot Basketball Captain.

“So, uh… y/n…” he begins, tentatively testing out your name, “how about we start with some ground rules, lay out all the do’s and don’t’s and what each of us expects from this.”

“Well, let’s start with the obvious, no sex, in fact nothing past first base. You may call me common pet names, like babe, baby, honey, when appropriate, but never sweetheart. No one can know the truth, everyone has to actually believe we’re dating and happy together for it to work. Also on that note, how did this supposedly start? Why did I suddenly get over all your years of torment and fall into your arms?”

“Ok, well that was a lot all at once. Um I guess yes to all of the aforementioned, I will add that I will pay for any ‘dates’ that we do go on. I’d feel weird if I didn’t, even if this isn’t real. Also you have to show up to my games, all the big ones at least. But as to the last part I don’t really know… I uh apologised…” he replies uncertainly, with a slight wince.

“Oh, that’s all it took you said sorry and suddenly I was swooning over you?”

“I don’t know, it was a really good apology?”

“Ok let’s hear it then. Like you mean it too.”

“What?”

“This grand apology that was supposedly enough for me to forget what a fucking jackass you are to me and all my friends.”

“O-ok… ummm y/n…” he trails off.

“Wow solid start there bud you wanna maybe continue, you didn’t even say the words ‘I’m sorry’.”

“I’m thinking ok! When did you become such a bitch anyway, thought you were all quiet and shy and shit?”

“Oooh yeah, that’ll really sell it call me a bitch-”

He cuts you off quickly, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. It’s just, this is hard, ok?”

“Can’t be harder than the shit you put Eddie and me through.” You grumble.

“Ok I’m sorry, really, I am. I don’t even know why I gave you shit, you actually seem kinda normal enough. I guess it was just ‘cause you were always around him, always defending him. Why even hang around that creep anyway?” He answers surprisingly earnestly.

“‘Creep’ isn’t any better than ‘freak’ you know.”

“See, like that always defending him.”

“He’s my friend, surely you know what that’s like or at least have some concept of it? And don’t give me some “oh being popular is a curse you never know who your friends really are’ type shit.”

“Of course, I have friends… it’s just no one has ever defended me like that.”

“Maybe ‘cause you’ve never needed it, anyway that is entirely beside the point. We’ve gotten derailed, let’s try to get this back on track.”

“You believe that I am sorry, right?”

“I believe that you think that, but it’s good enough. Just maybe leave out the bits about insulting my best friend in your apology and it’s fine.”

“I am sorry.”

“Ok, so you apologised and then what? How did it get from mutual understanding to ‘I’m madly in love with you.’?”

“As part of my apology I offered to buy you dinner, extend an olive branch so to speak. At dinner we actually hit it off and find that we don’t actually hate each other. Maybe we have some things in common and we decided to do it again.”

You hum in consideration, “Ok, sure we’ll go with that, but what do we actually have in common?”

“Not much I’d imagine, we… uhhh go to the same school, we’re in the same grade, ummm what… what kind of movies do you like, what sort of music do you listen to?”

“Well, my favourite movie genres are horror/thriller and fantasy. Music, it varies, but mainly rock I guess, like punk and alternative type stuff, I know my music taste surprises most people. I think they think that I’d have to be into like classical music or something for being so shy and bookish, even though I hang around a bunch of metalhead rockers.”

“I dunno none of that really works, I mean I don’t mind horror but it’s not my favourite. Ummm there… there is one thing that no one really knows about me…”

“Yeah, what’s that oh man of mystery?”

“Don’t… don’t make fun of me, please.”

“Why shouldn’t I?” You begin but catch sight of his pleading gaze and you fold, “Oh, alright fine, guess I’ll take my own advice and ‘be the bigger man’.”

“Thank you. Uhh… I actually like to read… like a lot, but I don’t let people see me when I do ‘cause I gotta wear these dorky glasses. I’ve had a few concussions and it’s messed with my vision.”

“Oh, ok I actually didn’t expect that at all. What sort of stuff do you read?”

“I like a lot of different things, stuff on history and war, sports… and um poetry…”

“Poetry? You, Jason Carver, read poetry?”

“Yeah, come on I said not to make fun of me.”

“No, I’m not… I’m not, it’s just not what I expected, the rest is yeah typical, I get that, but poetry? Does Chrissy know about this?”

“Yeah, she does. She also said she thinks my glasses are cute, but I don’t know, I think she was just saying that to make me feel better.”

“Ok, well I’m not all that into poetry myself, but history is alright, I guess. So, reading, we both like to read um anything else?”

“What about aspirations for after high school?”

“Well, you said you and Chrissy were thinking marriage, right?”

“Yeah, but not for a while yet, we’d have to get settled first, build careers so we can support ourselves.”

“Yeah, didn’t actually think you would’ve thought that far ahead, no offence. Personally, I’d like to get out of Hawkins for a start. Go to college, study maybe either something in writing or science, what about you?”

“Well, I’m aiming to get a basketball scholarship if I can, do something with that, but sports is kind of a high risk kinda deal. There’s no real guarantee. Not sure what my fallback could be, but I’m working on it.”

“That’s good. So, let’s recap. You apologised and took me out for dinner. I accepted and we got to know each other, found out we’re both readers and bonded over that. We shared our aspirations for after high school and agreed to do it again some time.”

“Yep, that all sounds about right, but don’t tell anyone about the glasses thing, ok?”

“Secret’s safe with me.”

“Thank you.”

“Ok, so the actual ‘dates’ is that going to be like a spontaneous thing or should we have a scheduled ‘date night’?”

“Scheduled date night sounds better to me, I can do Saturdays after practice?”

“Yeah, that works I guess, how are we going to balance your games and Hellfire though? They clash more often than not.”

“Well, can’t you guys reschedule your little cult meetings?”

“Jason,” you sigh exasperatedly, “you were doing so well too. It’s not a cult, it’s a Dungeon’s and Dragons club. And they will not reschedule for this. I can maybe get someone to sub for me every now and then, I guess.”

“It’s ok you only have to come to the big games, I’ll let you know which ones they are when they come up.”

“Sure ok, that’s settled. First ‘date’ next week, what are we going to do?”

He shrugs, “We could go to the cinema? I overheard Chrissy telling her friends that… Munson was going to take her to see ‘Pretty in Pink’.”

“Really, you want them to see us together that soon?”

“I dunno, why not?”

“Oh, no. No, we are nowhere near ready for that. It has to be really fucking believable before that happens.”

“Ok, so what do you think we should do?”

“I think the first few ‘dates’ should just be practice being around each other. Don’t try and focus on somewhere we can be seen, think somewhere we can both be comfortable.”

“I mean I’d say the library, it’d fit into our narrative, but then there’s the whole glasses thing.”

“Yeah, ok… um how about we actually go for dinner. Maybe somewhere less common for all the Hawkins High kids to be at.”

“Oh, there’s this restaurant my parents go to! It’s called Enzo’s. How about that?”

“Wouldn’t that be a little, um… expensive?”

“Yeah, but so what? I’m paying.”

“I dunno just makes me feel skeevy…”

“Don’t. I’m the one who suggested it. Think of it as reparations for years of bullying.”

“Ok, fine. Enzo’s then. When does your practice finish?”

“Four. So, we’ll make the dinner around seven, I’ll uh pick you up if you want or we could just meet there.”

“Um yeah you can pick me up, it’ll give us more time to go over our stories, get everything straight.”

“Ok cool.”

“Cool.”

“Uhh… now what?”

“Um I mean you can go…what else is there.”

“Yeah, sure I’ll go.” He stands awkwardly, you stand with him to escort him out.

He pauses at the door, “Should we… try to interact at school?”

“Yeah… nothing too extreme just yet, but yeah, I guess. Maybe just like greeting in the halls, small talk, that sort of stuff.” You shrug.

“Ok, so I guess we’re doing this… babe.”

“Uhhh… yeah I guess so… babe.” The word feels foreign on your tongue, using it to address Jason Carver of all people.

You open the door waving as he leaves and he waves back. You retreat back into the comfort of your home a little dumbfounded by how that had turned out. It was interesting, being forced to see him in a new light, as a multifaceted human being rather than just some dumb jock stereotype.

It’s like the world is working against you, any time you and Jason are together, Eddie and Chrissy are nowhere to be seen. It’s beginning to frustrate you, you know there is gossip going around the school about you two, but neither of them have given any indication that they’re aware of it. 

Not even the rest of the Hellfire Club have said anything. They all know you’re seeing someone you’ve told them as much, you had to give some explanation as to why you were missing Hellfire sesions so much. They all believe you’re in a happy relationship, they just haven’t seen it yet.

You’re on yet another date with Jason, you’d missed out on this session of Hellfire Club to go to one of his games and he suggested dinner at the diner afterwards. A few of his teammates and their girlfriend’s had come too, but you insisted on your own booth, it could be so stifling being around Jason’s friends.

“So, what actually happened with you and Chrissy, if you don’t mind me asking?”

He sets down his cutlery and sighs, beginning in a hushed tone, “She started pulling away from me, don’t know what I did, it wasn’t so much like she was mad… just distant. I don’t get it.”

“Hmm, you know it may not have been anything you did, maybe she was going through some personal stuff.”

“Yeah, but why wouldn’t she tell me, I could help her. Why did she turn to… him?”

“Look I can’t answer for her personally, but sometimes when I’m dealing with my own shit I retreat into myself. Don’t wanna feel like I’m burdening others with my problems… especially those I’m closest to. Usually when I get like that Eddie is the one to pull me up, dust me off so to speak and just get me through it. He’s good like that, very observant when he wants to be, he just knows when someone’s got it rough and he wants to help.”

Jason scoffs, “Yeah alright, all the girls going to Munson… what’s he got that I don’t.”

“Did you even listen to a word I said? It’s not about you or what you can offer. She’s probably just going through something, maybe something she’s ashamed of or is embarrassed about and doesn’t want you to know. Maybe she’s just worried about how you’ll see her if you find out.”

“I would never judge her for anything, she should know that. Instead, she turned around and left me for another guy.”

“Jason have you fucking seen yourself, you can be such a judgmental, righteous prick-”

“Hey, keep it down, you don’t want someone to hear you saying stuff like that if we’re going to pull off the ‘loving couple’ shit.” He hisses cutting you off.

You lower your voice slightly leaning in, hopefully from the outside it just looks like you’re two little lovebirds wrapped up in your own little world, “… you are a bully and you’ve shown that girls aren’t off limits, why would she think she can go to you with everything.”

He has the decency to look ashamed at that, “I am sorry you know… for how I treated you.”

“Fine, ok I got that, I’m moving past it, but can you see where I’m coming from?”

“I-I think so, but what can I do… what could I have done then? What if we get back together and something like this happens again?”

“I don’t know, it’s a complex thing, you gotta be patient with her. Push but not too hard, get her to see that you won’t judge her for anything. When she really believes that maybe she will accept your help when she needs it.”

“I guess… thank you. You know I haven’t really talked about this with anyone, it’s good to get stuff off my chest.”

“Yeah, that is the general idea, when you’re going through something you need someone that will listen. And look at you turning to ‘another girl’ for support.”

He rolls his eyes, “Yeah, I get it now, ok. You don’t have to rub it in.”

“Ok… you know deep down and I mean deep, deep down you’re not so bad. You know when you actually act like a human being.”

“Oh, careful that almost sounded like an actual compliment.”

“Shove off… I mean I get why you act the way you do, I guess. I know your popularity is important to you, but is it really more important than being yourself, was it worth losing someone you love?”

“Ummm… no, no it’s not...” He concedes, “…but it is what I gotta do to get where I wanna go.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it-”

He’s getting frustrated, you can tell, the way he clenches his fists, “No it’s not. If I’m not popular, I’m not basketball captain. If I’m not captain, I don’t get the recognition. If I don’t get the recognition, I don’t get a scholarship-”

You place a hand over his, “Stop, relax its ok I’ll drop it, just keep in mind Chrissy likes you for you… I’m assuming… and if she doesn’t, she’s not worth it, but that is going to be how you win her back… by being yourself.”

“Fine.” He grumbles.

“You gonna finish those?” You point to the last few fries on his plate that he’d been ignoring.

“Nah, have ‘em if you want and then we can get out of here. I’ll drop you off at yours.”

“Thank you.”

As you stand to leave, passing the other guys from the team, Jason nods his head towards them and you give them an awkward little wave, calling out, “Bye guys, see you around.”

Andy calls back, “What you guys leaving already? Don’t wanna come back to mine? My parents are gone for the weekend, I was thinking we could… party.”

Jason answers for the pair of you, to your surprise in the negative, “Nah, sorry man gotta take my girl home she’s feeling a bit tired. You know how it is?”

Andy gives him an exaggerated wink that makes your skin crawl, “Sure do man, you kids have fun.”

You tug on Jason’s arm and he escorts you out to his car, “Ugh why’d he have to be so gross?” You groan with a full-body shiver.

He responds as he starts up the car, “Oh, come on it wasn’t that bad… and isn’t that what we want? For people to think we’re a good, real couple… real couples have sex you know?”

“So… you and Chrissy then…?”

“Of course, me and Chrissy. What… did you expect us to be celibate or something?”

“No uh… I don’t know, it’s not like I think about you with her… like that.”

“What about you… have you ever…?”

“Uhh… no, umm… it’s not that I don’t want to, I just never… I mean…”

He holds up one hand in surrender, the other still on the wheel, “Hey, it’s fine, you don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

You let out a sigh, “Ok, yeah… I am tired you know? This shit is fucking exhausting.”

“Gee, thanks. Good to know being with me is exhausting.”

“No, it’s not that, it’s just doing this is like constantly being on stage, putting on a performance… having to be so acutely aware of every action and everyone in the room.”

He’s silent for a moment, “Do you think… do you think maybe that’s how Chrissy feels with me?”

“I can’t answer for her, maybe that’s just something the two of you will have to figure out for yourselves.”

“Oh… ok.” He seems a little crestfallen.

“Sorry, I can’t give you a better answer.”

“Nah, that’s fine we’re almost at your place now.”

“We’ve gotten to know each other now, like really know each other, but there’s one thing I still don’t get.”

“Yeah, what’s that?”

“Why are you part of Munson’s little cult, I get maybe you didn’t have any other friends when we were kids but come on you could do so much better than that now.”

“Watch yourself there, Carver. You’re on thin ice…” you warn, “…and it’s not a cult. Ok, how bout I put it to you like this. That game we all play dungeons and dragons, what do you actually know about that?”

“Just that it’s some devil-worshipper thing…”

“See you’re wrong though, it’s not… at all. If anything, it’s the complete opposite cause you’re fighting against evil.”

He looks at you sceptically, you continue, “It’s just a little fantasy game, we’re not hurting anyone by playing a game. Look, you play basketball, you love basketball, there’s this whole culture around that. The way you feel about the game, your teammates, it’s not so different from Hellfire Club.”

“Yes, it is.” He protests.

“Just hear me out ok, D&D brings us together it gives us a sense of camaraderie we band together to fight the big bad evil guy, there’s strategy and an element of chance and everything can be decided by the roll of a die. I imagine scoring the final game wining point would feel the same as defeating the villain or pulling off an insane move that gets the party through untold dangers.”

“But-”

“Look, how about you just come to one of the Hellfire sessions see what it’s really like. You’ve got a bye this week, don’t you?”

“Yeah, but will they even let me through the door?”

“Yes, I’ll make sure they’re nice to you ok… but you gotta do the same.”

“I will.”  You shoot him a look, “I will, I promise.”

“Good.”

“Still doesn’t explain Munson though that guy is clearly…”

You stop him in his tracks with a pointed glare, “Yes… care to finish that statement?”

“Well, what I mean to say is he’s just so… so… oh the only words I can come up with are still devil-worshipper, with all his metal music and chains and leather, what do you see in him?”

“He’s a good guy,” he looks at you sceptically, “No really, he is, all of that hard-ass attitude stuff is just like a barrier to protect himself. He hasn’t had it easy and stuff like his music helps him cope. Is it really so bad that he is unapologetically himself?”

“Y/n the guy is crazy, jumping on tables, shouting off his little rants that make digs at the rest of the school, not to mention everything else.”

“He’s not crazy, he can be a bit dramatic but he’s got a point with that stuff. Like really why? Why do we get singled out and picked on for our interests when the basketball team can be celebrated for theirs?”

You rush to add,” I mean no offence by that, but really, we’re all here just trying get by, make it through one day at a time, find happiness where we can. He gives the outcasts of the school somewhere we can belong and he’s been my friend since about as far back as I can remember, always been there for me regardless of what he’s going through. He is a good guy.”

“I mean I guess… when you put it like that. I still don’t like him though.” He grumbles.

“I never asked you to like him just be civil with him and I’ll try to make sure he does the same.”

“Fine I can live with that.”

At lunch the next day you decide to broach the topic with the rest of Hellfire. When you get there she’s there, you shouldn’t be so surprised you guess, but it had been a few days since you sat with them for lunch.

The way she was dressed today was almost enough to turn your stomach… she was wearing his Hellfire shirt. You steeled yourself, no you weren’t going to let this get to you, all the more reason to invite Jason to Hellfire.

“Hey guys!” You greet everyone as you plop down into a seat.

They reply in kind and you continue while you have their attention, “So, everyone knows I’ve been seeing someone…” they nod, “… well I kinda wanted to ask if you guys would be alright if I brought him by one of the Hellfire sessions? Just to watch of course, he said he wants to know what it’s about, so I thought the best way would be to show him.”

Eddie narrows his eyes at you, “Right why would we let some random guy-”

“My boyfriend.” You correct him.

“Whatever, your boyfriend… why would we let him sit in? We don’t even know the dude.”

“Well, there you go you can see just who he is when we both show up.”

“Yeah, and on that note, you’ve been missing a lot of sessions lately… what’s up with that? Would you even know how to play anymore?” He bites back snarkily.

Oooh, is he bitter, could this actually be working already?

“Of course, I remember how to play, it’ll be fine… please?”

“Fine, we’ll put it to a vote…” he looks around the table and the others squirm under his gaze, “right, everyone in favour of y/n’s boyfriend joining the next Hellfire session, raise your hand.”

Everyone at the table raises their hands, except you, Chrissy and Eddie, he continues with a sigh “…ok looks like he can join, but just this once.”

Dustin tries to lighten the mood, “Come on Eddie, don’t you wanna meet y/n’s new boyfriend?”

Unfortunately, that was the wrong thing to say, Eddie scoffs in response, “What difference would that make to me? He’d still be some intruder to our game.”

Gareth speaks up on your behalf, “Come on don’t be like that man, just be glad we’re getting y/n back and we’ll get to see who’s been making her so happy lately.”

“Yeah, sure whatever…” he turns to Chrissy suddenly, “Hey, sweetheart… would you like to come to the next session too?”

She offers an apologetic smile, “Uhh… no sorry babe, you know I’m not really into that stuff… but you guys have fun.”

She turns to you, “Hope your boyfriend enjoys it too.”

You try to match her cheerful demeanour without sounding sarcastic, “Yeah hopefully once he sees it, he’ll get just why I love it so much.”

There’s a heavy tension that hangs in the air for the rest of the lunch break, you keep your involvement in conversation to a minimum and finally breathe a sigh of relief once the bell rings.

You sit in Jason’s car twisting your hands nervously in your lap, “So you ready for this?”

He places a hand over yours, “Relax, it will be fine.”

“And you can promise you’ll be nice to everyone, and I mean everyone?”

“Yes, I won’t like it, but yes.”

“Thank you. And remember to keep an open mind, don’t just judge the game immediately because of what you’ve been told to think of it… please?”

“Ok, I’ll try.”

“Thank you.”

“Well, you ready to go in?”

“Now or fucking never, I guess. Hopefully we’ve done enough that it’ll convince everyone we’re a ‘happy couple’.”

“Yeah, come on.”

You hesitate again when you get to the drama room door, but he gives you a little nudge and you open it.

Everyone’s already seated at the table chatting animatedly, you call out to get their attention, “Um hey, everyone… sorry if we’re a little late-”

You’re met by flabbergasted stares and slack jaws when they turn to see you, arm in arm with Jason Carver.

Eddie is the first to speak, face set into a deep scowl, “Uh what the fuck is this, what is he doing here?”

“You guys said it was ok to bring my boyfriend. I said I was sorry for being late, but come on it’s only by a couple minutes.”

“Can I have a word with you outside?” Eddie storms over to you grabbing your arm harshly and leading you out the door, not waiting for a response.

“What the fuck was that in there? You’re dating Carver? The guy you’ve been dating… is fucking Jason Carver?!”

“Yeah… and? What’s it matter to you?”

“It matters because you’re my best friend and it’s fucking Jason Carver… you’re dating him after everything he did to me… to us?”

“Yeah well, you’re dating Chrissy what the fuck is up with that?”

“That’s different, don’t bring her into this.”

“Why? Why shouldn’t I huh? Some best friend you are, as soon as some pretty little blond shows you a smidge of attention it’s like I don’t even exist.”

“Just ugh… why did it have to be him?”

“Why did it have to be her?!”

“You can’t just throw my question back at me, at least Chrissy wasn’t the one going around calling us freaks and making our lives miserable.”

“Yeah, not like she stopped it either. And really Mr Nonconformity, you’re gonna go for the basic ass cheerleader? Way to break the mould. Really, I applaud you on that one, you’re definitely not just like every other teen boy here. All hard up over a girl in a short skirt doing her little rah-rah school spirit bullshit.”

“Chrissy is NOT like that!”

“Oh yeah, I’m sure.”

“And I could say the same about you, dating Mr Meathead Jock… that’s not any better now, is it?”

“Whatever, screw you.” You turn to go back inside.

“Screw me, no hey don’t walk away from me.” He grabs your arm again.

“Eddie, just stop.” You shoot him an angry look.

“Have you fucked him?” He hisses through clenched teeth.

“What?!” You can’t believe he just said that, where the hell did that come from.

“I said have you fucked him? He would be your first if you had, wouldn’t he?” He repeats, his tone bitter.

“That is none of your fucking business and don’t act like you haven’t slept with Chrissy.”

“Actually, I haven’t. She said she wants to take things slow and I respect that. Says she wants to wait til marriage and all that.”

“Yeah, that’s not how Jason tells it and he would know he’s actually slept with her. You sure she even really loves you? You sure you’re not just some rebound destined to fail?” You retaliate.

“What the fuck? When did you get so fucking bitchy, or is that just what taking Carver’s dick does?”

Before you know what you’re even doing you’ve reared your hand slapping him across the face sharply.

“Why don’t you ask your girlfriend what taking Jason’s dick does? She would know after all.” It’s a low blow, you regret it as soon as the words leave your lips. Regret almost everything you’ve said to him, especially when you see the look in his eyes, but it’s too late now.

It’s then that Jason pokes his head out of the doorway, “Hey…. ahhh, you guys, ok? You’ve been gone a while… the others sent me out to check on you…”

You turn to him, “We’re leaving, come on let’s go babe.”

“But I thought-”

“Yeah, never-mind…” you turn back to Eddie, who’s standing there shellshocked cradling his cheek, “I quit Hellfire by the way, see you fucking never Munson.”

You grab Jason’s arm dragging him along with you, willing yourself not to cry, just hold it in at least until you get outside, just make it outside.

When you do reach the front doors of the school you break, tears streaming down your face, sobbing.

Jason turns you to face him, “What happened? What did he do?”

“Fuck off Jason as if you actually care, there’s no one here to see it, just leave it alone, ok.”

He grabs both your shoulders, looking into your teary eyes, you turn you head away, “I do care though, what happened?”

“We had a fight obviously… this stupid fucking plan isn’t working. I told you it wouldn’t and now I’ve just lost my best fucking friend. I really fucking hate you, did I ever mention that?”

He cuts you off with a fierce kiss, you push him off of you, “What the fuck was that for?!”

“I dunno I kinda like you I guess…” He shrugs.

“Oh, no fuck off with that, I know you’re still in love with Chrissy. No one was here to see that, so what was it about really?”

“I do kind of like you though, not like Chrissy, different from that and I do still love her, but… what if we tried to make this work for real? What if those two never realise how we feel about them and it never works out?”

“No. I’m not going to be someone’s consolation prize or whatever. I don’t care if you don’t get Chrissy back, you can find someone else… maybe just be less of a ‘meathead jock’ and it’ll work out for you. Let someone see the real you for a change, the guy that reads and takes a girl out for silly little dates and cares about something other than himself.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… you’re not a ‘consolation prize’ and you do deserve better too. Just forget about Munson… honestly, you’re better off without him.”

“Don’t know that I am… what do you want to do about this now then? Do we still ‘fake date’? Try to get Chrissy back for you, even if Eddie won’t have anything to do with me now?”

“What do you want?”

“I don’t know, I guess… I want at least one of us to get something from this, otherwise it’s all been for nothing.”

“Well, it wouldn’t be for nothing really, I mean we never would have spent time together… reconciled our differences, if it weren’t for this. You could say we’re friends now at least.”

“Yeah, I guess… and I’m gonna need a friend, just kinda lost all of mine back there in one fell swoop.” You give him a bitter, teary-eyed grin.

“Ok, so let’s do that, we continue this ‘fake dating’ thing for a bit longer, see if Chrissy will come around. If not, I’ll be here for you as a friend either way, agreed?”

“Yes… as long as you never try to kiss me like that in private again, seriously what the fuck was that?”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

Fate really had a way of shoving it your face. Before when you were with Carver, you’d never seen Eddie and Chrissy around, but now it seemed like everywhere you looked Eddie was there glaring at you. You couldn’t take it, jealousy would have been fine… but this hatred that came pouring off him in waves was like torture.

Jason could see your discomfort, your pain, he asked you multiple times if you were still ok with this plan. You powered through, one of you should end up happy from all this, right? You still couldn’t believe that in all of this Jason Carver was the one to console you, if someone would have told you that just a few weeks ago, you would’ve laughed in their face.

The rest of Hellfire give you a wide berth, but still offer little smiles in your direction when you pass them… only when Eddie isn’t around though. You wonder what he would have told them, you’re sure he can’t have painted you in a very good light, but it was too late for you to try to explain yourself to them.

That’s how you found yourself on a Saturday night, curled up on Jason’s bed watching Friday the 13th: A New Beginning. It had just come out on VHS and Jason suggested the two of you watch it to get your mind off things for a bit. He had begun to warm up to horror movies in general, still not a major fan but he enjoyed it more now… your influence maybe?

Meanwhile, Chrissy had made her way to Eddie’s trailer, with a heavy conscious. She raises her hand to knock against the door, when it opens and she jumps back slightly.

“Oh, Chrissy hey… didn’t mean to scare you. I was just on my way to see you.”

“Uh… yeah, could we go inside and talk for a bit?”

“Sure, sure come in.” He steps aside, ushering her in with a sweeping gesture.

They both stand there awkwardly, before Eddie says, “What did you want to talk about?”

She hesitates and he moves towards the couch, urging her to join him, “Come on take a seat and tell me what you need.”

She makes her way over, tentatively perching on the edge of the couch.

“So…?” Eddie prompts her.

“Ummm… there’s no real easy way to say this, but umm… I think… I think we should end things Eddie.”

“Wh-Why do you say that?” He asks nervously, he had actually been planning to go see her to break things off, maybe this’d give him an out.

“Come on isn’t it obvious? Everyone knows you have feelings for y/n. It’s even clearer now that she’s dating Jason… and I… I don’t know… I think I still have feelings for Jason too.” She hangs her head in shame.

“What? I don’t have feelings for y/n… I’m with you, why would you say that?” He splutters, unconvincingly.

“So, you’re just not going to acknowledge that I have feelings for Jason?” She huffs looking back at him.

“Well, uh… fuck… I don’t know… did you ever have feelings for me?”

“Yes… just… just not like I do for Jason. Look you helped me through a really rough time and I am grateful for that… but I don’t love you.”

He sighs, “Yeah uhhh… I-I don’t love you either… I know how bad it sounds, and I do care about you… but I think it was ‘cause you were the first girl to ever show me any interest.”

“What about y/n?”

“What about her?”

“You have feelings for her, don’t try to deny it.”

“Ok fine, I have feelings for y/n… what difference does that make? We’re just friends… fuck not even that anymore. And she’s with Jason fucking Carver, of all the fucking people she had to choose from, she picked him.” He turns away angrily, hot tears prick at his eyes.

“Jason’s not that bad of a guy really, but what if we did something to… break them up?”

“Wh-what? Why? What would that even achieve… they’re happy with each other, I can’t take that away from her… and for what? She’s not even speaking to me, won’t even look at me, it’s not like she’d come running into my arms if things ended between them.” Tears have begun to run down his cheeks, he swipes at them angrily.

“Eddie… look at me.” She implores.

He does so and she continues, “You must be fucking blind not to see that she is in love with you.”

“What are you talking about?” He hiccups out.

“Y/n, she is sooo head over heels for you, Jason even picked up on it when we were ten for Christ’s sake.”

“No, that was just some dumb joke Carver used to taunt me.”

“Are you fucking kidding me right now? She loves you, you love her…” She reinforces before adding quietly “…I love Jason.”

“Then what are we even fucking doing together in the first place?”

“I don’t know, you were there for me and things just kinda happened…”

“Ok, so what do we do now?”

“Well… I mean we are over, right? I mean we can still be friends if you want, you are a great guy Eddie, I hope you know that.”

“Yeah… uh friends, I don’t know, we’ll see about that, but thank you. Do we have to break them up though… not that I’m happy seeing her with him, but can’t we just each talk to them tell them how we really feel?”

“I mean, I guess. It would be the nicer thing to do. Do you think you could handle it though, you’ve had all this time to tell her before, why haven’t you?”

“I just couldn’t… if things went wrong, I couldn’t lose her, but now… now she already hates me. She’s already lost to me, so what’s the harm in telling her now… not like she could hate me any more than she already does. I said some horrible things to her Chrissy…” He hangs his head, pressing his palms into his eyes.

She rubs a hand over his shoulder, “Hey, if things don’t work out, I’m here for you, ok?”

“Th-thank you. Should… should we go to them now?”

“You wanna go right now?”

“Yeah, I… I don’t wanna wait ‘til whenever we see them next.”

“Ok… alright, I guess right now it is.” She stands brushing down her skirt.

Eddie stands as well moving to the door, “Did you drive here?”

“Uhh… no, I walked.”

“You what?! In the middle of the night, you walked to the trailer park? Why?” He asks incredulously.

“Umm… my brother had the car tonight.” She shrugs.

“Then why did you come?”

“I just… it couldn’t wait, it was eating me up inside. I had to get it out. Besides the exercise will do me good.”

“Don’t. Don’t start with that. You could have called you know, if you didn’t want to say it over the phone I coulda picked you up at least.”

“Well, too late now… you wanna give me a lift to Jason’s? Then you can head off to y/n’s.”

“Yeah, of course. Come on.” He grabs his keys and escorts her to the van.

You had begun dozing off against Jason’s shoulder, when the ring of the doorbell rouses you suddenly. Jason looks down at you confused, before extracting himself by your side, he leaves the movie running while he goes to answer the door.

He sees Chrissy standing there bouncing on the balls of her feet, warming her hands with her breath, he then notices Eddie sitting in the van parked in his driveway glaring daggers at him. He turns back to Chrissy, “Uh, hey what are you doing here? You wanna come in for a bit, you must be cold?”

“Uh no that’s ok, this won’t take long… I just… I had to say… I still love you, Jason.”

“What about Eddie?” He glances over at him.

It was the first time he’d ever actually said the guy’s given name, first time he didn’t have to pause before he said it, first time he’d ever referred to him without any malice in his voice.

“We just broke up, it… it was never going to work between us. He’s in love with y/n… you know that.”

“Ok… so what’s he going to do then?” He looks over her shoulder again back at Eddie.

“Well, he’s going to tell her too. Right after whatever happens here… waiting to give me a lift if I need it.”

“Well, she’s here right now so…”

“Oh, um… I guess both of us should go then? Right, we’ve like interrupted date night or something?” She turns to leave, he stops her with a hand on her shoulder.

“No.”

She turns back, “What do you mean ‘no’?”

“I… I want you back. Have since the moment you left.”

“What… what about y/n?”

“She’ll understand… trust me. And you said Eddie wanted to see her… tell him to come in.”

“Are you sure about that… I don’t really see that going too well.”

“Yeah, I’m sure. Just uh… tell him to be on his best behaviour, ok?”

Chrissy makes her way back to the van, when she reaches the driver-side door, Eddie rolls down the window.

“Well?” He asks expectantly.

“It uh… went well, I guess. Um y/n is here now. Jason said you should come in and talk to her.”

“She’s here now, fuck I should have guessed as much… I mean, why wouldn’t she be with her boyfriend on a Saturday night? Jesus, I’m a fucking idiot. What am I doing?” He palms at his forehead in frustration.

“Did you not hear me, I said it’s going well.”

“What do you mean?”

“Jason is going to take me back. Y/n is going to be single and he’s invited you in to talk to her. That’s something right?”

“Inside his house… ha what so he can see me crash and burn, so they can both laugh at me, while she crushes my heart?”

“Don’t be so dramatic, just give it a chance.”

“You really think it’ll go well?”

“Yes. Now get out of the damn van and get inside.”

When he gets to the door, Jason greets him stiffly, “Munson.”

Eddie narrows his eyes at him suspiciously, “Carver.”

“I should… I should probably tell you guys something first. Umm… y/n and I dating was never real… I uhh, I wanted to make Chrissy jealous. Jealous enough that she’d take me back so I got y/n to help me.”

“What? Why would she even agree to that?” Eddie face sets into a frown.

“Well, the agreement was that from the moment, our little thing started from there on out I’d have to be nicer to you…” he nods in his direction, “and to all the other Hellfire members.”

“That seems kinda dumb.”

“Well, it was she thought so too, but I guess she thought it was worth it to protect her friends?” He shrugs.

“So, you gonna go up and talk to her? Sort your own shit out, while the two of us,” He gestures between himself and Chrissy, “can work our shit out too.”

“Uh, yeah sure. Which way am I goin’?” He eyes him suspiciously.

“Just up the stairs, first door on the left. We were just watching a movie.”

Eddie nods and makes his way upstairs.

He opens the door with a shaky, sweaty hand.

“Jason, who was at the door? What took so long?” You ask without looking away from the screen, snuggled down into the covers.

“Uhhh… not Jason…” He stands there awkwardly rubbing at the back of his neck, the sound of his voice surprises you, head snapping towards him.

“Eddie, what the fuck are you doing here? Why the fuck did Jason let you in?”

“We need to talk.”

“Yeah, save it. I don’t need any more judgemental bullshit from you… can’t stand to see the way you look at me now… so full of hate.” Tears spring to life in your eyes, you turn away from him.

“No, it’s not like that. Do you really think Jason would let me in if I was here to do that… on that note, I am soooo sorry for what I said to you that day. Words cannot express how sorry I am.”

You can’t bring yourself to look at him as you remember the harsh words the two of you had exchanged, guilt sweeping over you, “I-I’m sorry too, I didn’t mean the shit I said to you… it’s just you really hurt me, and I know that’s no excuse but…”

“No, I get it, I get it… I was just lashing out because I was hurt too.”

“I know… I should have known that dating Jason would hurt you I just…”

“You wanted to make Chrissy jealous? For him? So, they could get back together”

“What… how…?”

“Jason. Jason told me. Told me how it was all his idea, that the only reason you even went along with his dumbass plan was so he’d be nicer to me and the other Hellfire guys. It worked by the way, they’re both downstairs talking it out.”

“Shit… I’m sorry that was a really fucking shitty thing for me to do. I’m sorry you lost your girlfriend.”

“Don’t be, it worked out for me too.”

“What does that mean?”

“Well, I didn’t really love her… I love you.”

“Don’t.”

“Wh-what?”

“Don’t. You don’t mean that. Did Jason say something? Did he tell you how I feel about you?”

“H-how you feel about me? Y/n, how do you feel about me?” His heart palpitates, his palms sweat even more.

“Don’t play dumb Munson, I… I love you. I’ve loved you for as long as I can fucking remember…”

He interrupts you with a fervent, teary kiss. You hesitate a moment before reciprocating, melting into his touch.

You break away from him suddenly, “What are you doing Eddie? Why now? I don’t want to just be your rebound while you get over Chrissy.”

“Jesus, I forget how stubborn you can be. I. Don’t. Care. About. Chrissy. I love you. I’ve always loved you… don’t you get that?”

“You’re serious?”

“Of course, I’m fucking serious! Now kiss me again.” He demands.

You pull him back in for another kiss, then all at once you realise where you are. Kissing Eddie in Jason Carver’s bed and you pull away again.

“Um… sorry Eds, but I don’t think we should be doing this here.”

“Oh shit, you’re right.” He giggles, “You want me to take you home? Or we could go to my place if you’d prefer? I’ve got the van downstairs and I think Chrissy will be ok to stay here.”

“Yeah… your… your place sounds good.”

You make your way downstairs to find Jason and Chrissy making out in the hall, you grin and clear your throat.

They snap apart, Chrissy looks away bashfully as Jason looks over to you, “So, how’d it go?” he asks, more towards you.

“It uh… it went well. I’m guessing it went well for you two as well?”

He nods, “Did you two…” he gestures between Eddie and yourself, “… did you tell each other how you feel?”

“Yes, we did.” Eddie answers firmly, “And we’ll be going now.”

He looks to over to her, “You gonna be ok to stay here, Chrissy?”

She nods, looking up at the pair of you, “Yeah, I’m good. I’ll see you guys around I guess.”

“Yeah sure. Let’s… let’s head out y/n. Leave these two to their… reunion.” He smirks.

You nod and follow him to his van.

Seated beside him, his brash music playing softly in the background “So, I guess all of that worked out in the end, huh?”

He grins at you, “It did… in like a weird, roundabout kind of way.” His face twists into a grimace, “Does this mean I should be thanking Carver?”

“Maybe not that far, but I think he’ll be more civil towards you from now on at least.” You shrug. “Anyway, lets get back to your place, so we can have some more fun.”

“Oh, geez… hang on we’ll be there in no time.”

You laugh at his response, “Well someone’s eager.”

“Yeah, yeah we got a lot of lost time to make up for you know.” He waves a hand in your direction.

Before you know it, you’re back in his trailer, Wayne still isn’t home, not due back for another couple hours.

Eddie ushers you inside overly excited, his motions remind you of a puppy, bounding along, looking back at you over his shoulder.

“You wanna… go to my bedroom?” He asks voice laden with purpose.

It wouldn’t be the first time you’d been in his room, nowhere near it, but the air was heavy with expectation tonight.

He continues a little rushed, “We don’t have to do anything, especially if you’re not one hundred percent comfortable with it-”

You cut him off, “Eddie, relax I’ve been in your bedroom a thousand times it’s no big deal… and I do want to kiss some more… if that’s ok with you?”

“Oh, sweetheart that is more than ok with me.”

“Yeah? Let’s go then.”

He grabs your arm, pulling you along all the way. He practically launches himself at the bed and you tumble along after him giggling.

“I’m not going anywhere you know, you don’t have to fall over yourself to get here.”

“Promise you’re not going anywhere?” He pouts up at you, looking at you with those big brown eyes.

“I promise. Now kiss me Munson, like you mean it.”

He dives in kissing you clumsily, messily, but you don’t mind because it’s Eddie… after all this time pinning after him, you were here.

Your hands wander into his long curls as things begin to heat up. His hands begin to wander too, but he pulls away, “I-is this ok?” He gasps breathily.

“Perfect Eddie.” You grab one of his hands guiding it to your breast, “You can touch me wherever you want, ok?”

“You mean that? Like… really anywhere?”

“Absolutely.”

“This… this is your first time, right? I mean…” He trails off.

You know what he’s getting at, “Yes, it’s my first… nothing ever happened between Carver and me… it was never real.”

“And how far do you want to go tonight? ‘Cause I am more than fine keeping it just like this, we don’t have to do more…”

“Eds, relax honestly, look at me.” He looks deep into your eyes, and you proceed, “I am ready to give you anything you want tonight. If that means we go all the way, great. If that means we just lay here making out and groping that’s great too. Just know that I want you too.”

“I can’t believe this is actually happening.” He gasps.

“So, what do you want Eddie?”

“I want you, all of you… but I’m not… I’m not very experienced… I’ll try to make it good for you. Your first time should be…special-”

You press a finger to his lips halting his babble, “I know, and it will be special because it’s with you.”

“Fuck… ok, yeah…” He groans before capturing your lips with his own once more both yours and his eyes fluttering closed. His hands move to slip beneath your shirt and his calloused fingers fumble with the clasp of your bra for a moment before it releases.

He moves to the front of your chest, sliding his hands between the loose cups of your bra to cup your tits, squeezing them gently. When he rolls over one of your nipples you moan into his mouth. He matches the sound with one of his own, grinding his hips against your clothed core and you can feel the hard line of his cock.

You pull away from him, his lips follow yours for a moment, his eyes snap open searching for yours. You reach down gripping the hem of your shirt you pull it over your head, your bra follows along shortly after. He gapes at your bare chest and you giggle at his expression and tease, “Like what you see Munson?”

“Fuck you have the most perfect tits… can I… can I suck on them?”

“Remember, anything you want.” You answer.

He swoops in, ducking his head, tongue laving at your breasts occasionally pressing sloppy kisses to them. You move to straddle one of his legs, grinding down on it. He gasps against your skin. You tug on his shirt, “Can I see you too, please?”

“With pleasure.” He pulls away from your chest, hooking a hand into the bottom of his shirt, pulling it over his head and tossing it away blindly. You run your hands down his now exposed chest coming to rest at his belt-buckle, you look deep into his eyes, “Is this ok?”

“Yes, yes, god yes.” He whimpers.

You unbuckle his belt, undo the zip and slide his jeans down his thighs, eyes locking onto the bulge in his boxers.

You look back up at him, “You got condoms, right?”

“Absolutely, bedside table… by the ashtray.”

You clamber off of him pulling down your pants as you go, you can hear Eddie ridding himself of his own jeans completely. You spot the dusty blue box and pluck it out of the clutter moving back to the bed.

You look at him, both of you left in nothing but your underwear. You hand him the box and he sets it down beside him, “Sweetheart, you’re going to need a little more prep before we get into it.”

“What like… fingering and stuff?”

“Uh, yeah sure… um could I try… eating you out… I really, really like that…”

“Yeah… ok we can do that.” You agree shyly.

He beckons you over, “Lay down for me.”

You take a seat on the bed leaning back lengthways, resting against his pillow.

He crawls up to you, resumes kissing you slowly beginning to trail down your neck. Your eyes close and you whimper in response, he continues further down over your torso until he reaches the waistband of your panties. He pulls them down gently, easing them off of your legs and tossing them aside too.

“So pretty.” He mumbles to himself before diving in and pressing a kiss to your folds.

“So wet too.” He groans.

His tongue moves to lap up your juices and you gasp. He probes your entrance a few times with the tip of his tongue before running it all the way up to your clit. He grins against you when you jolt at the sensation, running a hand up your leg squeezing at your thigh before bringing it to join his tongue.

He spreads your slick over your folds, before slowly slipping two digits into your entrance. He crooks them against your spongy walls and you tangle your hands into his hair again gasping out his name. He groans against you and the vibrations are something else. Your hips rock against his face of their own accord.

You can feel yourself gushing over his fingers, a tension mounting somewhere deep in your belly as he stretches your slick walls with his hand. His other hand comes to press down on your stomach limiting the motion of your hips, but doubling the sensation.

Soon your legs are trembling either side of his head, you tug on his curls firmly. A tingly sensation spreads from your cunt to the extremities of your limbs. You call out his name again as you pulse on his fingers and flood his tongue with your release.

His fingers slip out while you’re coming down from your high and you release his locks. He looks up at you face slick with your juices and his drool, he makes no move to wipe it off. Just grins at you and asks, “Did you like that?”

You pant out, “Jesus fucking Christ Eddie, that was amazing… not experienced my ass.”

“What… I’m not.” He insists.

“Ok, if you say so… but goddamn that tongue of yours is good.”

He chuckles, “Thank you for the review, I appreciate the feedback.”

You slap his arm, “Ok, come on… you think I’m ready now?”

“Yeah… yeah let’s go.” He fumbles for the box of condoms. Pulling one out, he looks down at you, “Now, you are sure about this?”

“Oh my god, Eddie if you ask me one more time if I’m ‘sure about this’ I’m going to slap you in the fucking face… just fuck me already.”

“Ok message received loud and clear.” He surrenders.

He rolls his boxers down wriggling out of them, his flushed, weepy cock bounces out, bobbing between his legs. He tears open the condom and grips the length of his shaft. He lines up the condom with the head of his cock, moving to pinch the tip of it rolling it down over his length smoothly.

You watch every motion eagerly and he gives his length a few pumps with his hand before turning to you, you see him open his mouth to speak but you beat him to it, “I swear to god Munson if you ask one more time if I’m sure, that’s it…”

“I wasn’t, I swear… I was just going to say, I love you and I really hope I can make this feel good for you.”

“Aww, Eddie come here…” You pull him in by the back of his neck, kissing him in earnest and he reciprocates.

He pulls back, “Ok now let me just…” his little tongue pokes out between his teeth as he grips the base of his dick and runs the tip through your slippery folds a few times, fully focused on his motions.

He rests at your entrance, just pushing in ever so slightly before looking back to you, “You ready? It might… it might hurt a little, but I’ll go slow. Let me know if you need me to stop, ok?”

You hum in response, “Mhmmm… I’m ready... and I love you too Eddie.”

Slowly he eases himself into you, inch by inch, you grit your teeth against the slight burn. He drops a hand to circle your clit and the pleasure overtakes any pain. You whimper and moan, as he coos down at you thrusting shallowly, “Look at you taking me so well, such a good girl for me. That feel good?”

You nod biting your lip in an attempt to hold back your moans.

“Let me hear you sweetheart, please… wanna hear all the noises you make.”

You break at his words, whining, “God… fuck… Eddie, please more… faster or something, need more.”

He increases his pace one hand still circling your clit the other moving to grope your tits.

“Yes, fuck… just like that Eddie.” Your walls begin fluttering around him as he groans above you, sweat collecting on his brow, hair hanging in his face, panting loudly.

You writhe beneath him as you spasm on his cock, clamping down on him. His hips begin losing their rhythm and he growls, “Fuck… gonna cum… hngh… gonna cum for you.”

He stills, buried deep inside you and you feel him twitch and throb as he unloads into the condom.

He pulls out and rolls over, collapsing beside you gasping for breath. He removes the soiled condom tying it off and tossing it over the edge of the bed. He turns his head to look at you, breathing out, “Fuck that was good, did I mention I love you? How was it for you?”

You giggle, “Yes you’ve mentioned it multiple times now and it was good for me too, thank you Eddie.” You reach over and stroke his hair, he leans in to your touch.

“So, uh… what now?” He mumbles.

“Umm… I dunno we go out on a date I guess, the usual boyfriend/girlfriend stuff.” You shrug.

“We kinda did this a little backwards, you’re supposed to date before you have sex, right?”

“Well, I think in our case we can make an exception, don’t you?”

“Uh yeah, I’m not exactly complaining I just think it’s kinda funny.”

You giggle, “Yeah and all it took was us dating the completely wrong people for the wrong reasons.”

“It’s where we ended up that counts though. How about we clean up and you spend the night? I can give you some clothes to sleep in.”

“Sounds wonderful.” You grin back at him.

When Wayne gets home, he peeks his head into Eddie’s room to check on him, force of habit by now. He’s a little surprised to see you there, wrapped up with him under the covers all snuggled up. 

He decides to leave it til morning, talk to the pair of you properly then. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t see this coming, but he wasn’t sure when Eddie had broken things off with his other girl… or if he even had. He shakes his head, all questions for tomorrow, he needed sleep now too.

[heteromerous-rhyming]

i think that i've figured out why i don't like show sally.

ok like don't get me wrong, virginia kull?? she ATE with that interpretation. her acting?? amazing. like i could truly get the core of her character.

it's just that i don't like the character the writers give us.

cw: discussion of abusive relationships, of toxic family dynamics, probably a good bit of generational trauma. I don't really get into details except with stuff shown on the show and written in the books but i wanted to be safe.

as someone from an immigrant household, as someone whose mom works a part time minimum wage job, as someone whose seen and been there as my parents fought, i just really really dislike sally's portrayal in the show. and it's partly because of poseidon and partly because of gabe (mostly because of her character in general but yeah, lets get the men out of the way first)

I feel strongly about poseidon in his relationship to sally very specifically. i don't mind his relationship to percy either books or show. but it's pretty damn clear to me that this show was written by someone who's never experienced sally's situation, of being the single working parent with an absentee partner (or in gabe's case a partner who literally ahHHHHHh). because from the beginning, from sally's reaction and snark to gabe, I felt like something was wrong or off, and it was Specifically the show because i read the books and i watched (some) of the musical and i never felt that way towards either of those. i'm not saying that my family situation is sally's (don't have a god for a father for one), but. by all accounts sally knows that this is an abusive relationship, the only reason that she's with gabe is because of the protection he offers percy. i have to assume that this is true because sally jackson turning gabe to stone is something i'm assuming is staying in the show, and i remember this being mentioned by grover? or someone in the first few episodes. and the cord that struck in me was not the traditional (that is, visible, defined, i don't like this word but i don't have a better one) abusive relationship but relationships in my community, of women staying with husbands because of their children, women outright saying this, women who know the world is cruel to single women and to single mothers specifically. sally, to me has never been under any illusions that gabe is any sort of relationship material. she has never been under any illusions that poseidon would be able to help in any way.

and that crux of sally's relationships made her first scene in the show all that more jarring. but it's not anything specifically that i can put a finger on. and maybe i'm wrong for this or maybe i'm expecting too much. but. sally doesn't have the resentment or the quietness or the bitterness or even the loudness that i expected. you have been the only true caretaker for your child, the only one in the house that really puts food on the table and on top of that is expected to do emotional labor? to cook and clean or at least pick up the food?

but she treats gabe like he's an annoyance. someone to brush off. and you see the manipulation tactics from gabe, you do, but.

its not that i want sally's spirit to be crushed. my mother's spirit wasn't crushed. the women in my community, they laugh, they cry, they watch silly tv shows, they have lives that they live, and in many cases they live well.

but the women that i know are also angry. they are either on fire or they used to burn. when they banter with their partners it often turns ugly because they are tired of the same damn argument day after day, because often the trivial things that are asked are compounded and compounded and compounded because you live in the same house, there is no escape, there is no private space, not really.

it's new york and sally works a job to support an apartment and her family. they are not well-off. sally has no support network we can see, and how could she? poseidon mentions that she has no one to talk to about these things, her parents are clearly out of the picture. all this to say. there is a certain understanding of class that exists within the books that was excised, i believe unknowingly, from the show, and it is the worse for it. there is a tiredness, a worn-down-ness from being low income that sally had in the books, but in the show i only see a struggling first time single parent. i don't see the complexity of a woman who literally gave up on finding a fulfilling relationship to be with a man for her child. i don't see the complexity of a woman working fulltime and still getting demanded from at home. and i didn't realize that I wanted to see that until I saw the show. i didn't realize that that was what i loved about the books.

i hate that they tried to bring poseidon back into sally's life as this perfect man who through cosmic forces can't help. i hate that sally calls him, i hate that he says he'll listen. but most of all i hate that sally just accepts him, falls into him. it's really hard to be a mother when your partner doesn't seem to help you parent in any way, even if he cannot help you. he's a greek god, there's no way in hell that he can begin to understand the lengths that sally has gone through to sacrifice and survive, the very human things that she's done. sally in the books thinks of poseidon as a sweet memory, almost a fairytale, and it's clear that this story is the one that brings her comfort. poseidon is a one night stand, a sweet stranger, she understands he's not coming back. but this poseidon comes when sally calls, and that i cannot believe. i cannot believe that she still thinks of him as the fairytale man, that she accepts him so easily if there isn't that distance. i cannot believe that there is no resentment, that she still puts faith in him as her god (the first episode when she talks about him just felt so wrong to me) if he's not a memory, but a recurring figure. this is not a story of star-crossed lovers, sally feels too real as a human being for that.

sally finds trust, finds contentment, in the books after percy leaves home, after she no longer has to put up with gabe for his safety. she does not find poseidon again. she marries a human man, a very ordinary human man who cares for her. poseidon visits after she is in this relationship and its an amicable one. he is percy's father but also distant memory all in one. sally has the strength to survive a terrible relationship and still find a way to heal and live fully after that.

but the anger. the fire was there. she turned gabe to stone. she reclaimed her life with her two hands.

you don't kill a man for no reason. you don't kill a man without emotion.

but it's that reason and that emotion that i don't get from the writer's room. and it just makes me deeply sad.

[pinkandlilacroses]

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

Angel - Paige bueckers

part 3

• summary {when an unsuspecting girl falls for the basketball star}

• warnings {drug use, angst}

• comment if you would like to be added to the taglist

bella’s pov

“ok you can go now” she says, emotionless

“oh”

“i mean, no offence but i have a girl coming soon, so you cant be here” she says laying on her back, breaking our eye contact

i don’t respond and put my clothes back on. this is fucked

“have a nice night”

i haven’t cried this much in months, walking through the halls, ugly crying.

‘paige’ has been blocked by ‘bella’

“bella whats wrong” avery says, empathetically

“i hate her, i hate her so much” i cry, barley being able to choke the words out

i look at avery after my response and i have never seen her that angry, there could fully be steam coming from her ears.

“please dont talk to her, please dont hurt her, please avery, please” i cry out, begging the infuriated girl

“why not bella, she deserves it” she yells

my tears dont stop and i feel like they will never stop pouring.

“tell me what she did”

i begin the tell her the events of tonight and her anger only grows.

“that fucking bitch” is all she can say in response

“but i blocked her, and im literally never gonna speak to her again” i say, trying to make a positive point, to counteract this negative situation

“you are never gonna speak to her again”

“im gonna go off to bed”

i feel broken, i got used. i wanted my first time with a girl to be meaningful, i know i like girls and i wanted to prove to myself that having sex with girls wasn’t wrong, but i feel wrong, i feel gross. i cant believe i would let myself be that vulnerable with someone i barley know. ive never been the one to have one night stands and ive only ever had sex with someone ive been in a relationship with.

i take my valium, something i swore to never use again after getting addicted, but its the only thing that works.

“hey, how are you feeling” avery ask’s, genuinely. i’ve never seen her be this gentle before

“wheres my weed”

“bella no”

“shut up avery”

i walk to the kitchen and unlock one of the drawers, and i see the stash. thank god

i know i shouldn’t smoke as a coping mechanism, but its the only thing that works, every time something bad happens to me, i turn to smoking

after going through 3 joints, im barley able to talk or stand up. perfect

knock

ugh

knock

fuck off

knock

“who is it” i say, it barley even sounded like words

“its azzi, is avery here”

who the fuck is azzi

“avery theres a bitch here for you” i say taking another drag

“oh my god! hey azzi” avery says, excitedly, why the fuck is she acting like that

“why are you so fucking happy” i ask, knowing full well how rude i sound

“this is azzi, shes in my psychology class and we have gotten pretty close” avery says, grabbing azzi and sitting next to me on the couch

“yo dont sit on my shit” i say, mad

“your bella right?” azzi says, happily. i hate happy people

“yeah”

“yeah avery’s told me alot about you” she says

“cool” i reply, dryly

“azzis on the basketball team” avery says, my eyes widen

“of course she is” i say, sarcastically. i hate basketball

“yeah, have you been to any games” she questioned, attempting to continue this boring conversation

“nah, i dont watch basketball”

“oh well you should sometime, avery keeps saying how she wants to go to a game” azzi says, looking at avery who begins giggling. sus

“bella your probably friends with some people on the team” avery says

“you wanna hit” i offer to azzi

“nah, i dont smoke”

“boring” i say, bluntly

“do you guys mind if some of my friends come over” azzi says

“no, no, thats perfectly fine” avery says, looking at azzi. basically eye fucking her

“who” i ask

“ice, kk, aubrey, nika and ashlee” she lists

fuck my life. im to high to care

“yeah whatever” i say, lazily

“ok perfect, ill tell them to come” azzi says, excitedly

“are you sure” avery whispers to me, being nice. for once

“i dont give a fuck, its fine” i say taking a drag

im so high. god damn

10 minutes later all of azzis friends turn up, why are they all so tall. what the fuck

avery introduces herself to them and points them to our couch

“hey im kk, your bella right” kk asks

“yeah im bella”

“hey im ice”

“hey im nika”

“hey im ashlee”

“hey im aubrey”

to many people to remember

until

“oh paige came to, i hope you dont mind” azzi says to us, mostly avery

avery says nothing, myself included

“hi paige” avery says, extremely cold

“come sit guys” azzi says, breaking the silence. i wish i wasn’t so high cause i wanna go to my room

everyone sits on the couch, paige sitting the furthest away from me. funny. not funny. not laughing

conversation begins and everyone is involved. everyone but me, ugh i’m so uncomfortable

paige keeps looking at me, and yes i’m noticing because i’m looking at her to.

paige’s pov

fuck. why do i keep looking at her.

she blocked me last night so obviously shes mad about my actions last night, its just a hookup, nothing more.

its not that deep

“i’m going to bed” bella says, slurring and barely able to stand up. i didn’t know she smoked that much, i guess i don’t know anything about her. but i don’t care.

“paige are you ready to go” kk and ice say to me

“yeah, aubrey, nika, azzi, u ready to go”

“yeah lets go”

“actually im gonna stay” azzi says. sus

“buy guys” is said in unison

azzis pov

“ugh finally” avery says, while smashing her lips onto mine

A/N: im being active rn lolll. how do we like avery and azzi

[gateau-au-earl]

kuroshitsuji s4e1/ED thoughts

ok yall now that it has been over 24 hrs and I've seen the ep over three times, I have THOUGHTS. mostly very positive, everything was beautful to look at and the 1:1 comparisons between the manga and the anime made me very happy as a veteran kuro fan that had to live through the mess of s1 and s2 plots (even tho they might have a sentimental place in my heart just because of nostalgia).

but i wanted to come on here and yap about the ending theme and how it encapsulates sebastian and ciel's complicated and very interesting relationship. idk abt yall but im a big fan of the op and ed this season!

first things first just to get this outta the way, I dont interpret them as a ship so please dont come in here with that interpretation 👁️ I'm serious .

that being said -

the ending theme is beautiful in both its animation and what it says about the butler and earl's relationship. I'm just gonna get the gushing outta the way first but it was aesthetically GORGEOUS in its animation. the way ciel fell so gracefully and the colors with SID's music is cinematic perfection. the change in animation style is very easy on the eyes as well! gg cloverworks animation team!

this has been marinating for a while, but what really gets me is the scene where ciel falls. he is falling into darkness, when it suddenly becomes lighter, with the sun illuminating the clouds. sebastian "saves" him and they fall together across this very pretty backdrop.

the demon might've caught him, but that doesn't prompt him to rescue ciel, to stop him from falling to his death.

sebas instead gently takes ciel's hand to guide him there. he gives ciel a false sense of security, of trust, catching the boy when he's at his darkest place, but instead of saving him, he drags him to down to his hell. he is deceiving ciel with a beautiful view and promises in their contract that will ultimately hurt ciel. its cruel and will only lead to pain for our earl.

sebas is a demon (obviously) who is leading ciel to his doom, but the path they take is twisted and tragic but strangely beautiful like the gorgeous sky in the ED.

ciel enjoys the power and omnipotence he has with sebastian, knowing full well the demon is leading him to his demise. he knows that this relationship will end him being sebastian's dinner. ciel knows he can't trust sebas, but does anyways because sebas is the only person who can't hurt him until he inevitably does.

the fall might result in an ugly death, but the view is pretty nice on the way down. the beautiful sky colored with deception, manipulation and misplaced trust.

yeah, sebastian will end up hurting ciel the most at the end, but the boy doesn't care at the moment. sebas is the only ""person"" who knows him with all the ugliness of his past, yet still protects him, serves him, and doesn't treat him like a helpless creature. so ciel is forced to place trust in a fundamentally untrustworthy creature knowing he is inches away from the demons bared fangs.

sebastian helps him survive his living hell now and get what he needs to get done, so he doesn't care what happens after. his descent to darkness becomes much more beautiful as a result.

shippers may have one interpretation (which I'm NOT a fan of...), but this is how I see it, and I think it makes this ending all the more impactful and tragic. but here I am, and I'm enthralled by the beauty and can't look away.

anyways, thanks for reading my brain dump, and looking forward to ep 2 folks!!! hope yall liked my micro analysis/semi organized gushing, and r enjoying this kuro renaissance as much as I am! here's a professor michaelis for reading this far

[atom-writings]

Can I request the allies helping their S/O when their depression keeps them in bed for a few days, which isn't normal for them.

hetalia allies when their s/o is going through a depressive episode

1.8k words ~ gender neutral scenarios

tw: theyre not always the best but they figure it out (:

a/n: hope this was ok. if u want just like, comfort, thats cool and i can do that too seperately (: but anon i totally get i got crippling depression too. were alll in this togeeethherrr

America

Depressive episodes were nothing out of the usual for you. What was out of the usual though, was just how horribly this one was hitting you. But it seems like the person who it hurt the most, was Alfred.

Once you began spending the majority of your time in bed, he began to bother you incessantly. It'd be more annoying for you if it wasn't clear just how much Alfred was panicking.

Every day he returned from home to find you in your miserable state, he would question your sudden episode over and over again until one of you fell asleep. He offered to take you somewhere, to buy you everything, anything to get you back to normal. No matter how much you insisted that none of that would help, he continued.

That was until one day, upon his return from work, he didn't immediately come up to interrogate your lack of motivation. From your shared bed, you could vaguely hear him fumbling around downstairs. After a while, his footsteps finally echoed up the stairs.

Your door creaked open slowly, revealing Alfred awkwardly carrying bags of snacks as well as a TV. He rushed forward to throw everything on the bed before starting to hook up the TV in front of the bed.

“Alfred?”

“Yeah?“

”What are you doin'?“

”Making this room fun to be in,” He answered bluntly, but his tone was kind.

After a minute, he finished setting up the TV and crawled into bed with you. Before you could say anything, he pulled you flush against his side.

“Staying in here is no good for you, but at least there's ways to make it... less bad.” He told you softly.

You took a moment to respond, ”Can... can you stay in here with me?“

”I'll stay in here until you're ready to leave, K?“

England

As soon as your illness began to rear its ugly head, Arthur took notice. It's not like it hadn't happened before, after all. The unusual eating habits, the exhaustion, how less excited you would become over things you love, it's all typical. So he would help the way he usually did.

If you're too tired for work or school, he gets you out of it. If you're hungry, he makes whatever you want anytime. If you're slacking on chores, he makes up for it two-fold.

The entire time you spend gloomily sitting on your phone or watching TV, Arthur is running from place to place in a panic. It's clear why, he's just desperately trying to ”solve“ your sadness. After all, over his many periods of depression, he always works himself to the bone to get through them. He struggles to understand how you can just... sit there.

But of course, that's not how human depression tends to work. Seeing him so motivated did nothing but make you more insecure about your own sudden ”laziness.” Living in an incredibly clean house only helps for so long until it starts feeling weird.

The only place safe from his worried frenzy was the bedroom, where you lay nearly all day. It was quiet there, at least. Not frustrating like everything else. That was until Arthur interrupted your silence by joining you in bed with a huff.

“Love, you've been in here all day.”

You didn't respond, simply nodding and rolling to face away from him.

“What's wrong?”

Still, no response.

He grabbed your shoulder lightly, trying to pull you to face him.

“What is it?”

“You know what's wrong.”

He sighed, before laying down as well. His arms wrapped around your waist as he pulled you closer to him, his soft breath hitting the back of your neck as his heart beat against your back.

“I guess a better question would be... do you want to talk about it?”

You pause, ”Not really...“

”Well, I'll be here with you until you do.“

”No running around?“

He chuckles, ”No, I'll stay here. After all, you're strong... I imagine this won't last forever, right Love?“

France

Francis is a sensitive person, but most importantly he's an emotionally intelligent one. He notices as soon as your depression begins to get bad again, and he always tries to do little things to help. But... he knows that you're the one who's had to live in your head for years. The only reason he would go out of his way to help is if you asked him to.

Which you usually don't. It never seems to stay unbearable long enough for you to justify asking him, even though he's made clear he's always willing to do anything for you.

But this time is different, it feels as if your thoughts can't stop, no matter what you do. Even as you rest in bed, you only get more and more tired, more angry and miserable. Francis noticed this... but he wouldn't want to do anything you didn't want him to.

At least, that's how he thinks usually. But now, seeing his beloved sobbing for the 15th day in a row, he decided he had to do something.

Early in the morning, before the sun had fully risen, you were awoken by Francis's smiling face.

”Time to get up!“

”No-“

You were swiftly cut off by him grabbing your arms and pulling you upwards.

”I've set out clothes for you. We're going somewhere.“

You shook your head, ”W-Where? I'm tired-“

”It's gonna be fun! I'll buy you coffee on the way, don't worry.“

So up you were, regardless of your protests.

An hour-long car drive later, and you understood why he was so enthusiastic about going here. Before you stood the most stunning valley you had ever seen, surrounded by perfectly green trees and water so blue you could've sworn it was fake. But the breeze flowing through your hair said otherwise.

“While we walk to the beach, you can tell me all about what's wrong, okay?” He locked his hand around yours.

Sure, it didn't solve everything. But... it was better than the bedroom.

China

Yao doesn't really... understand what depression is. When you tell him it's a “mental illness” all he understands is “illness.” So the moment things start getting worse for you, he's recommending all the things he learned to make sick people better.

If it gets to the point of being bedridden, he acts like you're gonna die. Which is obviously not very... comforting. So after many times of you telling him to leave you alone, he's gotten used to popping in every couple of hours with tea, but that's it.

After all, you're usually back to your normal self pretty quickly. But this time, he can tell something's off; and he's not about to let you wither away.

So, one morning, you're awoken to a delicious breakfast already in your lap and Yao sitting in front of you, looking like a kid on Christmas.

“Wh- Yao? Why did you...”

“You haven't been eating enough, and I don't want you getting tired soon.”

You looked at him suspiciously, “Why?”

“We have plans.“

”Good plans or bad plans?“

”Good plans! What do you think of me?“

Once you finished eating breakfast, he dragged you out of bed. No matter how much you protested, his grip on your hand was strong. He brought you to the other side of the house, into his already set-up studio.

”What are we doing in here?“ You ask nervously.

”Getting you out of bed,“ He responds quickly, gesturing to the yoga mat set up next to his.

All you could was sigh and stand next to him, waiting for instruction.

”Do we really have to do this?“

He nods, spreading his legs to the side and reaching down with one hand. Looking up at you expectantly, he smiled.

”It keeps you spry,“ He switched sides, ”It keeps you healthy.“

”I'm really not in the mood,“

”Trust me.“

With a huff, you slowly worked your creaking body into the same pose he pulled.

”I can't stand to see you suffer in that room.“

”It's not fun on my end either.“

”I love you. I wish you would tell me how to help.”

You groan as the next pose he demonstrated stretched you a little bit more than what was comfortable.

“You can't 'help.' Just gotta wait it out.“

He took a moment to respond, “Well, I suggest you wait it out in ways that get your mind off everything. Like this.”

“It's helping the tiniest bit, I guess...”

He chuckled, “We will keep working at it until you feel better. No matter how long it takes.”

Russia

When your depression gets bad, it seems to be obvious to everyone... except Ivan. Despite you bringing it up to him, he either doesn't know what to do... or he doesn't care. The possibility of the latter doing nothing to make you feel any better.

Even as you spend all day laying in bed, crying constantly, he doesn't seem to notice. He just acts like you aren't... suffering. That stings, a lot more than anything else creating this depressive episode.

But after a week of this unending gloominess, you get a strange text from Ivan.

“Come downstairs.”

Weird and annoying... but more importantly ominous. It takes you only a second to throw on a hoodie and rush downstairs. You can't hear his usual humming, and the house seems completely still as you search for him. But when you look out the back window, you see him.

As you enter the backyard, you fully see what he was doing.

In the middle of the yard, he set up a picnic. Surrounding him is a mountain of bright flowers, and tens of little plates bearing your favourite sweets lay on the light blanket.

“Come sit, darling.”

You would be foolish of you to not oblige. Once you sat down next to him, he reached out to stroke your cheek lovingly.

”What is torturing you so horribly?“

You took a deep breath, “Where to start?”

“Wherever you want,” he clucks his tongue sympathetically, resting his hand on your thigh.

“Y-You know... I thought you didn't care. You've been so... normal...”

Ivan looks awkward, averting his gaze, “I didn't want to make it worse. You're so strong, I knew you could get through it on your own. I'm sorry.”

“I can.... but I don't want to...”

He leans forward, kissing your forehead.

”I promise, now, you will never deal with anything alone.“

”You're sure it won't be too much?“

”Never. Never too much.“

hey there. its gonna get better. its gonna be different. but its gonna get better. there are hundreds of people youre gonna meet, and hundreds of places youre gonna go, and its gonna be amazing. one day youll wake up and realize everything is alright. because youre gonna be ok.

[arttrampbelle]

Random shang tsung hcs

Cw:nsfw content. Fluff.

Tried to make it gn but it leans towards fem reader. My apologizes if this isn't my best. Its kinda done on the fly. I needed to put out some hc kontent for people.

💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍❤🐉❤🐉❤🐉❤🐉❤

Sfw:

I hc shang is an ugly crier. Like when he genuinely is upset,crying,etc. He's a fucking mess. Not many ever see this,so if you do. He trusts you completely. He hates feeling vulnerable.

I also have a whole ass astrology chart for him. Maybe I'll post it up later. I hc him a Taurus sun with a scorpio moon. This explains why his emotional breakdowns are oof. (Scorpio and Taurus are opposite,they are similar but different ways of handling things but they are more alike than different. But both are fixed and very stubborn,very deep,and very loyal to those they deem safe and trustworthy) again i have a whole chart for him. And I'll explain why i personally feel these fit him. (Again my personal hcs plz dont take it too much to heart this is just how i see him)

Shang tsung is particular about his hair,he takes very good care of it. Hair,in some cultures is a symbol of status and health. He takes very very good care of himself. So if his hair is absolutely disheveled. He either isn't doing so good,if his demeanor is sour. Or if he's in a good mood,he just got laid. Those are the only times he's got "bed head hair". He doesn't even let his servents touch his hair. So if he let's you,he trusts you. Unless if you're hired as his personal handmaiden,then well that's your job. But depending on how intimate or close you are in your relationship with him,he might let you go further. Either way he trusts you.

Shang doesn't tolerate disrespect. Of any kind. Especially during a tournament. He takes his role as tournament master seriously. All guests on his island,regardless if "friend" or foe. Hospitality is his specialty. All will be accommodated for. If you are disrespected,uncomfortable with someone,or someone was "out of pocket",he will step in. Especially if you're a woman (he has a bias towards in favor of women,he trusts them more,goes the extra mile more and tends to be in more favor of women in kombat,not that he doesn't trust men. Its just an unfortunate circumstances in his past that a lot of men tended to be assholes n rude around him. He's got high ass standards for men) or if you are a new kombatant (if you're new,he's gonna go a little easy on you. Because this is your first kombat,maybe even tournament. He will be extra extra gentle with you. He wants to make a good impression. Hee hee). He hates rudeness towards people who he deems as (pardon this please) soft,gentle or looks "weak" (Look he doesn't mean anything by it ok?) Mostly outside of kombat. In kombat however,your ass better be ready. He won't be as forgiving. But outside of kombat he is poised,collected,and a soothing presence. But yeah if someone's giving you trouble,all you gotta do is tell him. And he will deal with them immediately. You never have to worry about such matters with him. But especially if he likes you.

Shang tsung loves to drink morning tea and watch the sun rise. And also read n have tea before bed. As long as he does this,He feels his day is complete. Regardless if the day was "good" or not.

Shang tsung loves fruit,all kinds. But especially Tropical or outworld "exotic" fruits. Feed this man a peach,apple,or fave fruit of your choice and he will be absolutely over the moon. The only time he'll ever be practically putty melting in your hands. He loves being pampered and to pamper. Absolutely loves gentle and romantic acts of service. God damn soft shang is fucking a treat. Totally the guy to love the champagne/wine and strawberries thing.

Shang tsung is the type to be genuinely hurt if you are down on yourself. Like if you tend to be harsh on yourself,doubts,etc. He sees you as his greatest treasure. So why talk that way about yourself? He never sees you that way. He sometimes gets even a bit mad that you feel so lowly. "Dont ever lower yourself to anyone!" He would command. "You are beautiful/handsome/gorgeous,amazing,talented. Much more of a higher standing than any of these lowly souls" . Shang is totally the man to gas you up. Put you in front of a mirror. "Purr" or "coo" in your ear and say how absolutely ravishing you are. Maybe even dress you up in fine clothing. Silk even. Like this man hates seeing you down,but especially if it's you being mean to you. Not on his watch!

Shang tsung sometimes likes to watch you. Nothing in particular. No real reason. He likes to people watch. But especially you. He loves to watch you do mundane things. Or even when you train. If you are happy,cheerful. Or even stimming. He finds it absolutely delightful. He loves your company,if ever should be the day where he can't enjoy your company. He would be very distraught and very sad.

Shang is love is absolutely suffocating,intense,hot,loyal,like the devil in love. I can't see it any other way. He of course will be respectful to his beloved. However. The internal feelings of this man for you is fucking insanely high. No words could be put how much he loves you and the lengths he would go for you. He is legit a gomez. "I would kill for them,i would die for them. Either way,what bliss"

Nsfw under the cut:

Nsfw:

Shang tsung totally has a praise kink. This mofo you can't tell me wouldn't. Giving AND receiving. He will praise you to the highnth degree. Telling you in increat detail on how fucking gorgeous you are. You body,the way your smile curves,your eyes. Your hips. Etc. Like unf. This man knows how to make you feel adored. But in the same,he likes the return. To be worshiped. But i bet you knew that. Tell him how handsome and intelligent his is. Praise his mind especially and you got him hooked! Tell him how beautifully sculpted his body is. How fine this mofo is. And again,melted.

Ok shang tsung? Is shang hung. Like nothing super outrageous. But he's got some length,and a bit of girth. 8-9inch length. A decent girth nothing again outrageous. However it will stretch you slightly. Might takes some wiggle to get it in. But it feel good af.

Shang loves to talk dirty. But he's classy about it. Like he'll say things more like "you like being masters whore?" (Emphasizes the word whore with some harsh r sounds like almost a purr or a hiss) or "you take my cock so well my dear" (i hc shang says cock rather than dick or penis or any cheesy euphemism. He's too classy).

Shang tsung if you both are nude in bed. Enjoying each others company with some wine. He's the type to take either your nipple of your breasts (if you're afab),a finger,or if you want drip it on your sex. And lick it off.

He totally has toys. Magic toys,exotic edenian dildos,etc. He would use them on you. He prefers still himself,all natural,non gmo shang cock. Buuuuut if you aren't in the mood,he's busy,or you just wanna tease or try something different. He's willing to use some magic on you while fucking you with a toy. Like this man has it down pat. You're taken well care of. And he won't stop till you've had enough. Speaking of which

This man has fucking stamina for daaaaaaaaays. Even as a foxy grandpa. This man could go for hours. He won't let up till either of you are truly satisfied or you both pass out. Like kombat,he can go several rounds. Works your ass like it's his profession. >:3c

He can be soft,sensual,and slow love making. Like every stroke is just pure ecstacy. If you want it sweet,his love is like absolute honey. Or.....he could pound that ass out and make you beg like his personal whore. Mewling and begging to him. Not caring if anyone hears you. So what if they hear you. They outta know how much he loves you. And how good he fucks you. They know they'll never have you,he has you all to himself. Smug bastard he is. But his aftercare? Top notch! He will care for you like you're a delicate petal on fresh snow. Soothe any "marks" he may have left. Kiss every inch so gently. A bath? Yes. A massage? Most definitely. Anything you need. You got it. Anything you wanna do for him? You got it.

Shang tsung is the type that if he fucks you on his throne,in his throne room. If you going doen on him. He doesn't care if people see. Tho he prefers privacy in that area. But it's not as huge of a deal. However. If he's going down on you? Nah they better leave. He hates being interrupted. Eating you out/succing you.

Places on your body he absolutely is over the moon about. If reader is afab: he loves your hips,thighs,breasts,and loves to rub your clit. Pays extra attention. Yeah he knows where its at. He knows exactly how to work that pearled pussy. If reader is amab: your chest,your stomach,your arms and biceps. Loves to play with your balls. If reader is gn/in general regardless of sex or gender: your eyes,your face. The small of your back. He loves to cum on your face,chest,lower back. And if you are comfortable he will inside you buuuut if not. Those areas will do.

Shang tsung loves to watch you play with yourself. Don't matter if he's in the mood or not. He might join and play with himself with you if he is. Mutual masturbation is something that happens quite often im sure. But overall,he just likes to watch you. He might comment on how good you are with yourself. Either way. He likes to spectate. He is a tournament master after all

It isn't easy to rile him him. Getting him hot and bothered may seem like an easy task but its anything but. However,once you do. You are guaranteed to get fucked by him. One of The best ways,is to tease and stim his mind. Good conversation,genuine honeyed words and compliments. (Remember it needs to be genuine,he'll smell fakeness from a mile away) put the ball in his court,he'll play all day. Once you stim his mind and get him going he'll play lovers chase in no time.

Remember shang will undress you with his eyes and mind before ripping it off with his hands.

He won't ever say no to a blowjob. However,he loves giving you oral more. Besides he loves to fucking tease. (Gdi shang!)

Shang if he's away from his island from you. (Hey more likely that's where you'll be ok?) Like for some reason if he's in outworld,doing various personal errands. (Not for shao kahn because i hc after a certain point,he wasn't under shao kahn anymore and was free. But twice as dangerous for others because of his still unpredictability. I have a whole thing for that. But thats for another post). But if he's somewhere private,away from you. And he starts missing you and is in a "mood"*tm* . He'll start playing with himself,he doesn't usually do this,he'd rather wait till he gets home to you to relieve himself to you. But hey,sometimes it is what it is. He'll be quick about it tho. He hates getting caught with his literal pants down when not at home. He gets embarrassed easy.

Nothing changes if he's an old man or when he's young and rejuvenated. Tho i would say sex with shang as an old man tends to be more tender,slower,and more romantic. More passionate. When he's rejuvenated,healed,and full of vigor again. He'll be more confident in getting a bit more rough. Again not to say he wouldn't as an old man. He just is more self conscious about it. You'd need to be gentle with him in his more vulnerable state. Praise him genuinely as an old man and he may be a bit more interested in fucking you harder or being a bit more exerting.

Ok that's all for now. I may make more sometime.

Hope you guys like it.

🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚❤🐉❤🐉❤🐉❤🐉❤

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Bon Mots

Oscar Wilde: Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this the tale of the ugly painting Wilde: but first Wilde: some patented oscar wilde bon mots Wilde: the only thing worse than being talked about is Wilde: go ahead, guess Mary Shelley: i ain't playing this game

Oscar Wilde: I hear some of you don't appreciate my bon mots Poe: oh er Poe: it's not that oscar Poe: it's just that Poe: Poe: clive do you want to pitch in here? Barker: no you're doing fine Barker: haha

Wilde: what's the problem? Poe: oh it's not you oscar, it's us Poe: its just that your wit is too droll for this audience Wilde: really? too droll? Wilde: Wilde: you're just saying that to be nice Poe: no! NO of course not

Oscar Wilde: okay okay just give me another chance Wilde: now this bon mot Wilde: this one i think you're gonna like Wilde: [clears throat] Wilde: so why is it that you park on a driveway and Barker: BOOO Wilde: drive on a Barker: BOOOOOOO

Wilde: ok ok just wait Wilde: this next one Wilde: oh boy Wilde: this next one's gonna kill Wilde: you ready for this one?? alright here it comes Wilde: what's black and white and red all over Barker: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Barker: BOOOOOOOO!!! Wilde: [tugging collar] woof tough crowd tonight Wilde: steve must be out sick Wilde: better bring out the big guns Wilde: ok so there's this traveling insurance saleman Wilde: and there's this farmer with these 3 horny daughters

Barker: BOOO Poe: clive Barker: what? he sucks Poe: yeah but Poe: god, for pity's sake, clive Poe: he's dying out there

King: look, oscar, maybe it's just that your style of humor isn't right for this crowd Wilde: what kind of humor do you guys like King: well, we're all horror writers King: so kim newman

Kim Newman: [pulling up in a comically undersized bicycle as 'Entrance of the Gladiators' plays on calliope] DID SOMEONE SAY MY NAME???

Kim Newman: good evening ladies and germs [rimshot] Newman: i just flew in from san francisco and boy are my arms tired [rimshot] Newman: [waggles eyebrow, bowtie spins] Barker: now THAT'S comedy Poe: he's done it again! Koontz: i like THESE bon mots! Wilde:

[strawberryraviegutz]

I really REALLY hate those kinds of stupid “hot take” posts. I think they’re just garbage to purposely farm more discourse to cause infighting, but I’ve been holding this in for so long and I need to get it out of my system so here it goes.

Alastor fans are allowed to dislike Valentino. Valentino was made to be a dislikable Villain while Alastor BY VIV’S OWN WORDS is a chaotic neutral antihero based off of Dexter with a moral code. Of course people are gonna like Alastor more than Valentino. The antihero/vigilante is a very popular beloved trope. I mean just look at Magneto and Venom.

You guys claim to want more nuanced characters but when we try and tell you that Alastor is more nuanced BASED OFF OF EVIDENCE FROM THE CREATOR and little possible context clues in the show we get accused of “babying/woobifying him”(as if Val fans haven’t done that to Val). This isn’t a hit piece against all Val fans/simps btw. I may hate that moth, but you guys should be allowed like him without receiving hate and or death threats.

It’s not “hypocrisy” to dislike Valentino or the Vees and like Alastor for the reasons I said above and the four of them aren’t comparable. Yeah they share some traits but overall the only thing Alastor and the Vees have in common are the mistreatment of the souls they own. Like I said, Val fans shouldn’t be attacked for liking him but the thing is…if you’re gonna preach those words then do the same for Alastor fans/simps because we get attacked too.

(Again it’s not all Val stans but it sure it a lot of them. I’ve all so seen Val haters do it too.) Yall claim not to harass people over fictional characters yet will go under Alastor posts and or discussion threads and be like “Uhm actually him and Valentino are the same🤓☝️”.

“He’s worse than Val” “Why can’t we just have a good villain” “Just accept that Alastor is a villain stop babying him” when we’re just minding our own business. Not to mention people going under fanart of Angel! Alastor and being like “erm actually he’d never go to heaven🤪”.

Along with yall bullying the hell out of Alastor selfshippers/simps and using tumblr sexyman as an insult(which reaks of internalized misogyny btw because majority of Alastor simps are women + women are always the first to be made fun of when it comes to characters that Classify as tumblr sexymen being found attractive by them or any character you personally wouldn’t find attractive.)

And yall going around and keep calling Alastor ugly under posts about people gushing about him and i don’t mean lighthearted jokes either because i make fun of the back of his head sometimes too. And full blown harassment. When an Alastor fan provided evidence of Alastor being a more nuanced character which were clips from Viv’s streams, people in the comments and qrts were being extremely rude and dismissive. It got so bad that op deleted the og tweet.

Don’t go around and claim to be against cringe culture but then make fun of people for finding Alastor attractive. And for goodness sake STOP FUCKING CALLING HIM A SLAVE OWNER. And yes he owns souls but that doesn’t matter.

Alastor is canonically half black and its overall disgusting to slap the label “slave owner” onto him knowing damn well that he grew up in the Jim Crow era of America in the Deep South of Louisiana. His existence as a mixed black person back then was basically considered an abomination. With how terrible it was for black people back then, Alastor probably bore witness to a lot of messed up shit growing up and if that’s the case then it’s no wonder he’s so messed up in the head.

This type of behavior has been going on since the days where we only had the pilot and it’s only gotten worse since the show came out. As soon as I saw that scene with husk and Alastor in hell’s greatest dad I automatically knew what was coming. I’m not saying that Alastor Is a good person nor am I saying that what he did to husk was ok. But to go after/make fun of Alastor fans,purposely denying evidence of his character while in the same breath preach against bullying people over liking certain characters makes YOU the hypocrites. So much for anti-harassment. I’m tired. Bye.

[harringtonspolaroids]

omg ok so robin x popular! reader where she’s a cheerleader who robin thought was out of her league (and straight) but they both just have massive crushes on each other

a/n: anon this literally took me out of my writers block ty ty i loved this sm 🙏🙏 also the ending kinda sucks but its wtv !!

word count: 1054

warnings: light cursing, this is not proofread

𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞 | 𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐞𝐲

Robin sighed as she watched you walk right in front of her, with the rest of the cheer squad onto the gym’s floor.

She tried to look uninterested, like she merely thought the team's dancing and efforts to draw the crowds attention was just decent. But Robin couldn’t help but look at you. The way your smile seemed to brighten the entire room, the way you waved your arms and jumped around laughing, shaking those ridiculous green and white pom poms. She thought you looked like the most gorgeous girl in Hawkins, hell, maybe even in all of Indiana. 

Then the basketball team walked out onto the floor. 

You so clearly liked them. Robin watched you try to hide your embarrassment of being singled out by one of the team players, as he sent you a wink. Robin rolled her eyes at his pathetic attempts to flirt, but she couldn’t deny that was partly jealousy. She wanted to be the one who made you get all nervous, she wanted to be the one you liked, not some ugly basketball player that probably reeked of trashy cologne and was a total pig. 

Robin just faked a smile and continued playing her trumpet. It was ridiculous to think that you would ever like her, even as a friend. You were too good for her.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

You let out a laugh, as the guy whose name you had kind of already forgotten, continued rattling on about a party you’d skipped over the weekend. 

In reality, you weren’t paying attention to him. Your locker was at the perfect location, right in front of the band room, allowing you to peer inside. Sure the people you mostly associated with thought they were all a bunch of dorks and losers, but you thought they had substance. Specifically the girl with the short hair and raspy voice. You had never gotten her name. All you knew was that she was pretty, and nice, and funny. Or at least you hoped so. You didn’t really talk.

“See you Friday?” the boy looked nervous, and you didn’t even remember what plans you had agreed to.

“Of course, I’ll see you then, buddy!” You cringed slightly at your use of the phrase, but Jesus Christ you had no idea how to let him down easily.

You watched as he left, some disappointment in his eyes. 

Robin walked out of the band room, her backpack slung over her shoulder, as she held her trumpet case in her hand. She hated having practice because you would always be right outside, close enough that if she wanted to she could just talk to you, yet still out of reach. Yet it seemed that today, you would be closer to her than before. 

“Ohhhhh, shit, I’m so sorry-” Robin stammered as she knelt to the floor picking up the instrument’s case.

“No- no- it’s my fault I totally tripped you- on accident of course, I never would've wanted to trip you on purpose it’s just that I wasn’t looking.” You rambled on kneeling on the floor to help pick up some sheet music that had also fallen onto the floor.

You looked up over at her, as your hands met when you reached for a paper. “Oh, is this supposed to be for the next game?”

“I’m sorry what?” Robin's mouth felt dry, she couldn’t believe she was standing in your sheer presence and now you were talking to her and touching her hand? It felt unreal. 

You waved the paper in the air as you handed it to her, “Is it the music for the basketball game, next week?”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s uhm, supposed to be for the next game- you already knew that though because you just said it and of course you are going to be at the next game because you, well cheer and- and I- I cannot shut up holy shit… I’m sorry. You probably don’t,” Robin cleared her throat, “want to hear me talk that much. Shutting up now.” Robin let out a nervous laugh. She was so convinced she had ruined everything, even the chance of you becoming friends or even just people who you talked to in the hallway. 

“It’s totally okay, don’t worry about it. It’s actually kinda cute.” 

Robin was sure she looked like a deer standing in front of headlights. Her brain was definitely fried from pulling all nighters and drinking too much coke. There was no way you just called her “cute”. 

Calling her “cute” was totally different from you calling her “nice” or “friendly” or even “not as annoying as everyone said.” And there was also no way you were actually flirting with her. Or were you? 

Robin’s mind felt like it was running a thousand miles a second.

You could feel what you thought was an uncomfortable silence. Maybe Robin didn’t get your hint. “Hey you know what I just remembered? I’m supposed to come up with a new routine for the girls on the team- its a whole thing- but, I was thinking, maybe I could come over and practice at your place on Friday and you could serve as the music? It’s silly, I know but-”

“It’s not silly at all, it sounds like a great idea. I love it, but are you sure you don’t have plans with your boyfriend?” It was Robin’s last ditch effort to confirm that you were in fact into girls.

“I don’t have a boyfriend. I’m actually not really looking for a boyfriend right now,” you said, trying to enunciate the boy part of it all. 

Robin’s eyes were wide open as she got your message, “Oh! Okay, then yeah it totally works for me, I can swing by later and give you my place…”

“So it’s a date?” you asked hopefully.

Robin swallowed, “Yeah. A date.” 

You smiled and squeezed Robin’s arm, “I can’t wait.” 

Robin watched you float down the hall, a new bounce in your step as you headed over to a group of girls Robin wasn’t really a fan of. ‘A date’. The words echoed in Robin’s mind. She was going on a date with you. It felt truly unreal. Yet somehow, a part deep inside of Robin felt like it was meant to be. It was just you and her.