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#okay im definitely projecting but that's the point
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trying to assign a crawlers song to dick so i can write a fic for him and either im projecting or this man has too many issues bc bruh i cannot decide
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harukapologist · 9 months
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a cute detail in haruka's room
This turned into a half-ramble half-headcanon post so I apologize for how messy it is lol
While watching undercover for the first time I noticed that there seems to be a sketchbook in Haruka's room, in which a colorful tree is drawn
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Haruka seems to be hyperempathetic, and usually hyperempathetic people are quite artistic in their worldview and their hobbies, so I have a headcanon that Haruka likes to draw and/or paint, as a hobby and coping mechanism, a little escapism (especially since Haruka's no.1 coping mechanism with traumatic/stressful events seems to be denial—I'm going to elaborate on that in a different post because I've thought about that very, VERY often, and it partially explains why he acted the way he did in T2, to me) (I'm projecting a little bit because I kin Haruka and I'm a (hobbyist) artist myself but teehee)
When he was asked about his hobbies in his T1 interrogation, he just said he liked to talk to the other prisoners, but I think that's because he's insecure about his art being bad or unconventional (it looks like he used crayons or simple markers for the tree drawing. And also, the leaves are all different colors... perhaps I'm overanalyzing a simple scene, but it seemed to me that it's kinda symbolizing how he views & interacts with the world differently because of his neurodivergence. Still, the drawing is quite pretty imo, and he used the colors very well, so even though it's a tree with unusual colors, it still looks beautiful; even though he's different, it doesn't mean he's inferior, and there's still beauty despite how much he struggles to fit in. You know?)
Also also the way a lot of frames in weakness have hyper-realistic, vibrant backgrounds, as well as the blood being colorful (though that appears elsewhere too, like in Muu's MV) it really convinced me that Haruka sees the world through the lens of an artist, a passionate person who feels things very intensely.
Since the prisoners can request anything, I like to think Haruka secretly requested a sketchbook and some crayons to continue his hobby (I'm not sure if he can do that since it's unclear how the prisoners request & receive stuff (I'm a relatively new Milgram fan so I might've forgotten/not have seen an explanation if there's any ueueu))
I like to think he keeps his sketchbook to himself at first, but slowly opens up to the other prisoners about his hobby. First Fuuta and Mu, then maybe Mikoto, then the others (and they're all very nice to him & praise his art!!! Especially Mikoto I think. he would be very excited to see all of Haruka's art!!! Supportive big brother figure) :3c
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eclarinet · 2 months
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same soup... different day
#hello it is sarah in the tags again#i feel like i tell myself i'll actually use this as a blog and then i forget and then i remember and then i forget again#venting ahead if that is not ur jam (talking to the 2 followers who actually see my posts)#i like tumblr because it;s so removed from my personal life that it feels really like a place i dont have to be anything for anyone#anyway i've been wondering if i should go back to therapy again but i feel like they might get tired of me because i keep bailing and comin#back like an addict lol like i swear i'll commit this time! sike. ghost be upon ye#anyway this time i'd come in for the big D#i don't like the floor it just feels closer to being six feet under and a bit like where i belong#i feel like a great number of things have happened in the past year and i've met all of it with a very lukewarm sense of dread and anxiety#its not even about feeling happy i dont even think i can feel shaken by anything. i feel like people see my apathy and think it's confidenc#anyway im not going back. they always say the same thing. can't do shit about shit life syndrome. and i don't want pills i'm so sick of the#isn't it something that i'm especially depressed the day before i start my new job? it's a tradition at this point. cheers#isn't it cruel that everyone in my life seem to put me on some kind of bizarre pedestal and no one questions my decisions or authority and#i battle with myself to figure out if i'm doing the right thing (no one will tell me the truth they are all scared of me getting angry)#was talking with a friend about how it'll be if i join their group project in a module we're taking soon.#and she's like well isn't it obvious? everyone will just listen to whatever you say and we'll end up doing well.#no one would challenge you because you're always right. and it's like.. yeah. i guess. okay. (hate that i know she's not wrong)#lol can u tell this is why house is kind of getting to me. learning lots of things about myself watching that man commit medical malpractic#anyway. i didn't ghost my therapist this time i remember now. she left the clinic lol she asked me to connect on linkedin. that was amusing#i always feel like the therapists here never know what to do with me and i kind of have to hold their hand a bit through my psyche#also they seem to be a bit at awe of me which is a bit annoying. and i know that definitely sounds like Issues but it's just like#ugh not you too. please stop i'm sick of it i'm sick with it. i don't want you to be inspired by my awful life and how i handled it#and i have nothing to say for it but... *gestures vaguely* of all of this
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watery-melon-baller · 6 months
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not sure why but I'm still feeling like. an underlying wave of anxiety. why. there is nothing to be anxious about I got all the big things Done. I already had the massive anxiety. What more do you want from me
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tgcg · 9 months
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candid detail. my biggest project so far
hey happy new year
CG: DAVE?
TG: yeah?
CG: SOMETHING’S KIND OF FUCKING ME UP RIGHT NOW AND I NEED TO TELL YOU SPECIFICALLY ABOUT IT IN CANDID DETAIL.
TG: oh shit
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TG: yeah whats up
TG: not too often i get to be the sole audience to karkats grievances
CG: PFF, BULLSHIT. YOU'RE PRIVY TO WAY MORE ABOUT MY GRIEVANCES THAN BASICALLY ANY OF MY SURVIVING AND PRESENT FRIENDS, BY A SIGNIFICANT MARGIN, AND YOU KNOW IT.
TG: yeah and im boutta add another im like broses up on that hill bundled up in a long ass list of things that make the homies upset
TG: lay it on me
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CG: OKAY. SO.
CG: I’M KIND OF THINKING ABOUT JUST. US AND OUR BRO-DOM.
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TG: oh
CG: LET ME FINISH.
CG: ALL THIS TIME I’VE BEEN FUCKING FORCED TO SPEND IN THE DREAM BUBBLES MADE ME REALISE SOMETHING, AND THAT’S THAT…
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CG: THIS IS KIND OF RARE, RIGHT?
TG: what
TG: us
CG: YEAH! LIKE… THERE’S SO MANY THANKFULLY DEAD KARKATS I��VE HAD THE INSURMOUNTABLE GODDAMN DISPLEASURE OF FAILING TO AVOID THAT DON’T LIKE YOU, BARELY MET YOU, OR EVEN JUST DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU.
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CG: IT’S THE RARE AMBIVALENCE THAT REALLY GETS TO ME. I ABSOLUTELY UNDERSTAND A TIMELINE’S KARKAT FIRMLY DECIDING THAT THEY HATE YOUR ASS. NON-ROMANTICALLY I MEAN. THAT HAS BEEN ME, FOR FUCK’S SAKE. BUT THERE WAS NEVER, EVER!!! A POINT WHERE I JUST FELT NOTHING ABOUT YOU AT ALL.
CG: EVEN WHEN I INITIALLY HAD THE MISFORTUNE OF SEEING YOUR DOUCHEBAG SPECTACLES YOU GOT FROM YOUR BRO ON THE SCREEN, I AT LEAST HAD A STARTER DISH OF SKEWERED CONTEMPT TO WHET MY APPETITE. IT’S IMPOSSIBLE TO IMAGINE NOT FEELING ONE WAY OR ANOTHER ABOUT YOU.
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CG: ONE TIME I MENTIONED YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF A THREE-WAY ARGUMENT AND ONE OF THE OTHER KARKATS SAID "WHO?"
CG: "WHO?"!!!!
TG: now thats fucked up
CG: IT IS! AND THAT'S WHAT MADE ME FIRST REALISE THAT NOT EVERY KARKAT IS GETTING TO HANG OUT WITH EVERY DAVE, AND VICE VERSA. AND THIS IS GOING TO SOUND LAME AS SHIT IN A WAY THAT I’LL NEVER EVER LIVE DOWN, BUT. I FEEL BAD FOR THEM ABOUT IT! YOU KNOW?
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TG: well you always feel bad about around and towards other yous so thats
TG: wait
TG: is or is not the nature of this moment of self-pity fuelled by malice anger disgust or any similar terms slash phrases
CG: I MEAN, FOR ONCE? DON’T GET ME WRONG, THE MALICE ANGER DISGUST ET CETERA IS STILL THOROUGHLY PERMEATING THE WHOLE ORDEAL. THE DAY I LOSE CONTEMPT FOR MY ALTERNATE SELVES IS THE DAY I GET TAKEN OUT BACK AND PUT DOWN LIKE THE LAME HOOFBEAST I’VE ALWAYS DREAMT OF BEING. BUT…
CG: I ACTUALLY JUST FEEL SAD FOR THEM, STRAIGHT UP. INDEPENDENT FROM TERMS PREVIOUSLY MENTIONED.
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TG: damn
CG: AND THAT FEELS INCREDIBLY WEIRD TOO. I CAN’T EVEN ARGUE WITH THEM ABOUT IT, IT JUST MAKES ME FEEL THIS SHITTY, SHOCKINGLY QUIET… GRIEF? ALMOST? FOR THEM. GENERAL NON-TROLLIAN FEELINGS. AND EXCEPTIONALLY NON-STANDARD IN A KARKAT-TO-KARKAT CONVERSATION, AS YOU MIGHT HAVE GUESSED.
CG: BUT I KNOW IF I TOLD ANY OTHER EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED REFLECTION OF MY OWN FECULENT INNER FILTH TO TALK TO YOU, OR EVEN JUST LOOK AT YOU ONE TIME, THEY’D ONLY SEE IT AS ANOTHER PERSONAL AFFRONT. LIKE I JUST TOLD THEM "HEY, SHIT ALL OVER YOUR FROND AND SNIFF IT, IT’LL BE AMAZING JUST TRUST ME, ABSOLUTELY ZERO REASON NOT TO."
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TG: you come up with the most potent mental images man youre the wordmeister of viscerally gross as hell vocab
CG: THANK YOU.
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CG: AND LIKE… SHIT, I DEFINITELY WOULD’VE FELT THAT WAY BEFORE I GOT TO KNOW YOU! I UNDERSTAND THE INNER MACHINATIONS OF THOSE IMBECILIC NOOKSTAINS BETTER THAN ANYONE EVER COULD, DESPITE MY BEST EFFORTS.
CG: KARKATS UNIVERSALLY DECIDING THAT THEY JUST CANNOT LIKE YOU ON PRINCIPLE IS A CRISIS OF SHIT HAPPENSTANCES. THE HAPPENINGS ARE ALL OUT OF WACK, COSMICALLY.
CG: LIKE EVERY ME WRITHED OUR WAY OUT OF THE BROODING CAVERNS AND THE FIRST CONSTELLATION WE SAW PEELING THROUGH THE EXOSPHERE, TWINKLING IN THE REFLECTION OF OUR HUGE RED GANDERBULBS, WAS A PAIR OF SHADES GETTING COVERED IN GASOLINE, FOLLOWED BY A CONSTELLATION OF A LIT MATCH.
CG: A SIMPLE EQUATION WITH A VERY SIMPLE SOLUTION.
CG: A SYSTEMIC EPIDEMIC, IF YOU’LL PARDON MY BULLSHIT.
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TG: it is a goddamn catastrophe sweeping the karkat population
TG: presidents on the headlines trying to get karkats everywhere to stop quarantining their asses and have a real heart to heart among themselves about the issue but they keep isolating anyways
CG: I STILL DON’T KNOW WHAT THE HELL A PRESIDENT IS. YOU’VE FAILED TO DESCRIBE IT AS ANYTHING MORE THAN A POORLY-SELECTED "DUDE CONDESCE" WHO DOES NOTHING PRODUCTIVE AND THEN EITHER DIES OR RUINS EVERYTHING, OR SOME CHAOTIC COMBINATION OF THE TWO.
TG: well that is exactly what it is but wait good point
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TG: tragedy strikes as the karkat population reveals it doesnt generally know what a president even is so it means jack shit to them that this dude is trying to get their attention
TG: and mr president he is getting voted the fuck out of office over this blunder just an embarrassing display
TG: the public trust has plummeted off the fucking chart and cratered the damn ground like a meteor
TG: or he could be the tenth to die in office yknow there was a pretty big stretch of no in-office deaths til 2009 so maybe some catchup would be good for everyone
CG: ARE YOU TELLING ME YOU WANT TO MAKE ANOTHER PRESIDENT, AND THEN KILL HIM?
TG: not me personally i just wanna be there and see it also is that dream bubble fucking huge or what
TG: must be the size of
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TG: jupiter
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TG: look all im saying is the end of the world coincided pretty notably with a dry spell in the presidential kill:death ratio
TG: i was tragically too busy not dying to see obama die live on television when an errant meteor hit the white house that was my one chance
CG: PFFFT.
TG: i want to keep a comically aloof finger on the pulse of the shit but i do not want to be among the shit
TG: but anyways guess its my turn on the pedestal
CG: BE MY FUCKING GUEST.
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TG: yknow uh im not gonna lie if present me went back to me age thirteen sippin my dubious aj in my pre-apocalyptic layer of hell that was texas and told me
TG: hey that gray text dude is probably gonna be your best friend if you give him a shot yall could be sweet bros in real life itll be awesome
TG: i mean disregarding the fact i already doomed that guy because i dont remember that happening to me
TG: id probably be casting some wicked aspersions on that shit
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TG: our whole friendship feels like a plot twist to my damn life story
CG: I HEAR YOU.
TG: its like our narratives bumped into each other hard on the street and decided yknow what yeah this pavement is pretty cosy lets talk about your dad
TG: but
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TG: dont get your think pans too wrapped up in that different timeline stuff
CG: IT’S THINK PAN. SINGULAR. NOBODY HAS MORE THAN ONE THINK PAN, EVER. IT IS A SINGULAR ORGAN. IF YOU WOULD LET ME READ A TROLL BIOLOGY BOOK TO YOU ONE TIME WE’D STOP BUMPING INTO THIS ISSUE.
TG: gotcha and no
CG: OBVIOUSLY.
TG: but anyways dude look
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TG: i am literally a time dude and i can tell you right now with all the sage wisdome of my knightitudes
TG: not a good way of looking at it
TG: ive met daves that didnt like you either it doesnt affect jack or shit because those daves arent me
TG: like they are in a way but
TG: me and all those other guys spent the whole game honing down these doomed timelines to a fine point and that point has obviously involved a whole lot of hanging out with you
CG: …
===
TG: so
TG: maybe they just missed the point while you and me were on the breaking edge of that shit
TG: we got to the bottom line of it so it doesnt matter yknow
CG: HUH.
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TG: and i mean plus
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TG: ive seen a handful of alternate daves and karkats who get along uh great apparently so
TG: yknow
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CG: WHAT?
TG: you know what i fucking mean im not saying it
CG: ROLLING YOUR SHOULDERS AND SAYING "yknow" GENERALLY DOESN’T CONVEY FUCKING ANYTHING MEANINGFUL IN A CONVERSATION, DAVE.
CG: I’M NOT A PSYCHIC. YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO TELL ME WHAT YOU MEAN. IN CANDID DETAIL.
TG: its besides the point anyways
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TG: the point is its you right here that matters overall and you right here is chilling with me so thats gotta mean at least one or two things
CG: OKAY, OKAY, YEAH… I GET WHAT YOU’RE SAYING. I REALLY DIDN’T THINK ABOUT IT LIKE THAT.
CG: YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND BY NOW HOW IT’D BE REALLY FUCKING DIFFICULT FOR ME TO WRAP MY THINK PAN AROUND THE CONCEPT OF ME BEING THE RIGHT VERSION OF ANYTHING.
CG: BUT I FEEL LIKE THE AMOUNT OF TIME WE'VE SPENT TOGETHER CUMULATIVELY IN THIS TIMELINE MAKES UP FOR THE AMOUNT OF DAVES AND KARKATS WHO NEVER SPENT ANY AT ALL, BY AT LEAST TENFOLD.
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TG: heh yeah
HAHAH.
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CG: GOD. WHO WOULD’VE GUESSED THAT KARKAT VANTAS WOULD GET TOO FAR INTO HIS OWN THINK PAN ABOUT THIS BULLSHIT, RIGHT?
TG: stop repeating the words think and pan i get it already
CG: ARE YOU SURE? TOTALLY SURE? ABSOLUTELY ASSFUCK CERTAIN OF YOURSELF?
TG: yes dude
CG: ALRIGHT. KEEP IN MIND THIS WILL BE ON THE TEST LATER.
TG: im acing that shit i swear to god youre gonna eat your damn foot
CG: STRUT POD
TG: when i pass that shit to oblivion
TG: youre gonna regret doubting me
CG: OKAY, DAVE. THEN EXPLAIN TO ME WITH ALL YOUR SAGE WISDOME: WHAT IS A "LUMPSQUIRT"? AND REALLY, TAKE YOUR TIME THINKING ABOUT THIS. GOD KNOWS WE'VE GOT MOMENTS A-FUCKING-PLENTY TO SPARE.
TG: as the literal god of time in your local area i sure as hell do
CG: GO ON THEN.
===
TG: …
TG: pass
CG: EXACTLY.
CG: ANYWAYS, I’M STILL GOING TO GO AROUND FEELING ANOTHER LAYER OF PITY FOR THOSE GRAY BULGEMUNCHERS THAT DON’T GET TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOU. NOT THAT ANYTHING ANY KARKAT COULD FUCKING DO WOULD EVER MAKE THEM DESERVING OF IT, BUT THAT’S ANOTHER CAN OF DIRT NOODLES ENTIRELY.
TG: yeah i feel bad for anyone who isnt buddy-buddy with the david stri too
CG: OF COURSE YOU DO. I’M GLAD WE’RE ON THE SAME PAGE HERE.
===
TG: but also
TG: any dave who missed out on a slice of the realest homes in paradox space is a tragedy in my eyes
CG: Y--
TG: let me finish
TG: i just dont let it get to me so much cus… first of all ive been having to not let time shit get to me this whole damn game but also
TG: i know i have you here and thats whats important
TG: ok not "have" just
TG: how the fuck do i phrase that
TG: i know whatever is happening with other "us"es whatever shits goin down
TG: i can wake up and watch movies with you or hell i can even hang with you in there if i bump into you and thats what matters to me in this bro-dom thats what i wanna do
TG: and thats some real shit i just said feel free to co-sign it
CG: …
===
TG: karkat i meant it
CG: … THANKS.
TG: no problem
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skyenish · 21 days
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Devil Town | Riddle Rosehearts animatic 🌹 | (finished)
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Happy Birthday Riddle Rosehearts! Im a bit late, but here you finally go. Im very proud of how this animatic came out, and it’s definitely one of my longest projects ever!
I think this song fits Riddle very well. I’ve put a lot of thought and effort in making the lyrics match what’s happening, and I’m happy with the parallels and symbolism I added! There’s a lot of little things I honestly can’t wait for people to point out. I hope you guys will enjoy it!!!
Also, my laptop couldn’t properly handle editing this, as in it literally wouldn’t process the video and was blowing air hotter than the hottest days I’m Scarabia, so forgive me if some things are off beat! :(
Honestly, Riddle’s whole story is so sad. Luckily he’s getting better now, and let’s hope that he’ll be a better parent than his mom! (If he even wants to be one of course.) I think I sometimes forget just how important Trey was in Riddle’s life, and I tried to show just that in this animatic. I hope I did an okay job!
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redstarwriting · 1 year
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shit happens
spider squad x platonic!reader
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request?: yes
request: “Okokok, first of all CLASH WAS SOOOO GOOD OMGGI come bearing a request only if u want to. Teen!spider!reader who is Miguel’s favorite because they don’t cause him trouble. But it’s only because they get severely anxious when they break rules (I’m not projecting, you are). So he assigns them to go on a mission with the problem children hoping they’ll rub off on them, but the problem children just corrupt them. I just need more spider children being chaotic together and tired spiderdad MiguelMwah mwah love ur writing )pls only write this if u feel like it)”
requested by: anon​
word count: 2k
genre: platonic
Warnings: language, anxiety, Miguel being unrealistic with his expectations, electrocution, spider squad gettin thrown around
A/N: omg wait no bc same HAHA as someone with diagnosed severe generalized anxiety i get so anxious to break the rules even though my spirit always tells me to lol, i hope you enjoyed this anon! thank you for the request :)
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You were the golden child. There were quite a few teens in Spider Society, but you were by far Miguel’s favorite. And that’s all because you did what he said. Now did that mean you never questioned his authority? Of course not, you questioned him all the time. But you were too nervous to go against him. You were too nervous to go against anyone. It’s proven a problem in your job since the police are not your biggest fans, but luckily you befriended a nice police captain who eases your fears every now and again. Your weekly visits with Spider-Therapist have been helping with the problem, too. Which is great for you. But you still did what Miguel said. Mans could be scary.
And that’s how you ended up here. With Hobie Brown, Gwen Stacy, Miles Morales, and Pavitr Prabhakar. There was an anomaly that needed taken down in Hobie’s world, and Miguel stuck you with the four of them. To say you were nervous was an understatement. “Right, so anyone got a plan?” Hobie asks, in his thick accent. “What? What do you mean, dude, we’re in your world,” Miles says, and Hobie shrugs. “So? Not my villain, dunno ‘ow to stop ‘im.”
“Okay, well we know that he’s an electro variant, so… what can we do with that?” Gwen asks, and Pav sighs. “Be electrocuted,” he says sadly. “Miles can handle that,” Gwen says, and Miles snaps his head toward her. “Miles cannot handle that! Why are we saying Miles can be electrocuted?!” Miles yells, and the other three shush him. “’ow ‘bout you, mate, any ideas?” Hobie asks you, and you shrug. You look around before pointing up to the water towers on the roofs of the multiple buildings in New London. “Water,” you suggest, and they all look where you’re pointing. “Smart,” Gwen says with a nod. “How do we get the water to him, though?” Pav asks, looking at you again. You frown. “I… actually didn’t think that far.”
“Well, ‘at’s, easy. We just bust ‘em. Get ‘im to fly near one and,” Hobie makes an explosion noise and uses his hands to imitate an explosion. “What? But what about all the people who will lose water?” you ask, and Miles cocks his head to the side. “It’ll get fixed fast, probably. It’s our job to fuck shit up and then have other people fix it cause if we don’t fuck shit up, shit gets fucked anyways,” he says, and you sigh. “But Miguel said to try and not cause too much of an issue—”
“Oi. Who gives a flyin’ fuck what ‘e said. Not me. And this is my bloody world, I’ll cause as much damage as I want to,” Hobie says, and you look down. “Sorry.”
“You don’t gotta apologize for nothin’, mate,” Hobie says, and you mumble another ‘sorry.’ “You know what? I think Electro can wait a minute,” Hobie says, turning towards you, “More important matters to figure out ‘ere.”
“Like what?” you ask, and he shrugs. “Why are you so nervous?” he asks, and you gulp. “I-I’m not, I just—”
“You definitely are,” Gwen says, and Miles throws in a ‘yup!’ with a nod. “Is it us?” Pav asks, a hint of sadness in his voice. “W-What? No, that’s not it,” you say, waving your hands in a frantic way to say no. “I just am nervous in general. It really isn’t that big of a deal, guys, we should be focusing on—”
“Nope. You’re not gettin’ outta this, you been in ya ‘ead this ‘ole time.”
“I’m always in my head, it really isn’t that big of a deal—”
“Is ‘at why you try to avoid everyone? Don’t talk to no one?” Hobie asks, and you gulp. “I-I talk to some people…” you mumble, and a small frown forms on Gwen’s face. “The therapist in Spider Society doesn’t count,” she says, and you look down. “Well, why not…? He’s a person...”
“Because he’s like 40, and you’re our age,” Pav says, “you’d get along better with us, bro.”
“Miguel said that if anyone could make us not as ‘moronic’ it would be you, but I feel like he just kinda takes advantage of you instead of recognizing the pressure he puts on you. I have some experience with that,,” Miles says, and you sigh. “He scares me, okay? If I break the rules then I might simply pass away from him yelling at me,” you say, and Hobie shakes his head. “Love, the rules are all bollocks. Made by people who just wanna control your life.” Gwen nods. “Miguel is cool, sure, but if anyone can get away with anything… it’s you,” she says, and Miles chimes in. “And if you’re really that scared, remember he literally chased me around his world and destroyed a train because of me. You’ll never piss him off to that point.” You stay silent, playing with your fingers. Pav reaches out and grabs your hands. “Rules are meant to be broken, (Y/n), I learned that from Hobie. And besides, the villains we face are the biggest rule-breakers imaginable,” Pav assures, and you nod slightly. “And rules are such rubbish. ‘ey’re always different anywhere ya go. Try not to put so much weight on your mind ‘bout it, breakin’ ‘em ain’t a big deal,” Hobie says. You do actually kinda feel better. Hobie brings up a good point. Rules are different everywhere you go, so breaking one every now and again isn’t that big of an issue. In fact, it can be kind of encouraged. “Besides, breaking rules is almost like challenging ideologies, you know? Like, in breaking a rule, you challenge a system in place that is telling you not to break them. No one likes that. Where would we be if people didn’t break rules?” Gwen says. “That was deep,” Miles says, and Pav nods. “'at was a wicked way a’ puttin’ it, Gwendy.”
That’s a good point, actually. You think for a bit. If you look at it as challenging a system, or even doing what’s right, who’s to say it’s a rule that shouldn’t be broken? Hobie smiles underneath his mask because he knows they’ve gotten through to you. “So, whaddya say we go blow up some water tanks, eh?” Hobie stands, rubbing his hands together. “Okay,” you say. Gwen and Miles fist bump, and Pav does a little clap. The five of you jump into action, immediately starting to taunt and lure Electro to get him close to the towers so you can douse him and put him out.
The plan was going pretty well for the first two attempts, but he eventually catches on to what the five of you are doing. Which makes it harder. Miles does, in fact, get electrocuted. As does Gwen and Hobie, and coming in as no shock to anyone, Miles is definitely the least affected. You were able to dodge all of the attacks. “You’re doing great, (Y/n)! Mind telling me how the fuck your spidey sense is so strong?!” you hear Miles yell. “MILES LOOK OUT!” Gwen screams, but it’s too late. He gets electrocuted again. “Ouch, bro! That one looked like it hurt!” Pav yells, and Miles, who is now lying face down on a roof, raises his hand up in the air, flipping him off. You snort, and then see Hobie fly past you, landing on another water tower. “Hey! Dumbass! Over here!”
“Oh, please. You expect me to fall for that? I know what your little plan is, and I’m not about to be put out,” Electro says, firing some electricity out at Hobie. Unluckily for Hobie, it breaks the water tower and electrocutes him and the water that pours out of it.
You land next to Hobie, who is now just laying on the rooftop, but he grunts and mutters some British slang that you wouldn’t understand even if he explained it to you. So, you know he’s fine. “I have an idea,” you say, and he nods. “Yeah?”
“Yeah. But we need to make sure no one is on the street.”
“What’s the goody-goody plannin’ on doin’, huh?” he says, standing. “You’ll see, just make sure there are no civilians or anyone who will get hurt. And keep him distracted.” With that, you leap and go to another one of the water towers. You take a deep breath, thinking back to what Miguel said before the five of you left.
“Try not to destroy the city while you’re at it. (Y/n), I trust you’ll keep them all in line,” Miguel said, and you timidly nod. You’d love to not destroy the city, but it’s so hard doing that as a Spider-Person. But you also don’t want him to yell at you for going against his orders. Now you’re conflicted. “No promises, Miguel. We’re gonna do what we gotta do,” Miles says and Miguel sighs. “If anyone can reign the four of you in, it’s this one. Don’t let them pressure you into acting up, okay?”
You frown. Fuck that. Miguel is pressuring you into not doing your job right. You can’t always be perfect and careful. And lucky for you, the four of them were really good at distracting villains. You web two of the support legs, yanking them and breaking them off the water tower. It starts collapsing, but you catch it. “Shit, you’re heavy,” you grunt, but regain your balance, holding it on your shoulders. You twist your body, ripping the other supports off and making the water tower completely free. You get Electro in your sight and take a deep breath. You lift the water tower, tossing it up in the air before leaping out of the way and towards Electro. You shoot webs from both hands, connecting them to the water tower and yanking it towards you. You swing it around, connecting it with Electro’s body. Sure enough, it knocks him down and explodes on impact, drenching him. And you. And Hobie, Miles, Gwen, and Pav; but hey, you did it.
You land on a roof and look down. Sure enough, Electro is knocked out cold and completely out of electricity. You swing down, placing him in one of the technological cells that Miguel developed specifically for Electros, and nod. “That… probably could have gone better,” you mutter to yourself. Your self-deprecating thoughts were cut off immediately. “That was AWESOME, (Y/n),” Gwen says, giving you a thumbs up and hug. “Yeah, little Spider, that was bitchin’,” Hobie says, giving you a fist bump. “You made it look so easy! How did you do that, you have to teach me!” Pav says, clearly excited and impressed. “You were out here talking about how you didn’t wanna break rules so instead you broke an entire water tower? That’s cool, why don’t you try being less cool next time for the sake of us,” Miles says giving you a pat on the shoulder. You smile. “Thanks, guys.” Their praise was enough to make you feel better for completely and totally wreaking havoc.
But when the five of you return, soaking wet, Miguel pinches the bridge of his nose. “I said… to not destroy the city…” he mutters, looking at you with disappointment. You look down. “City’s still standin’, mate. (Y/n) kicked ass,” Hobie says, and the other three make sounds of agreement. “Y-Yeah, Miguel. All I did was break one water tower, it’s not that big of a deal,” you say, and he sighs. “One? You all broke four water towers on four different buildings! And you flooded an entire street! You’re supposed to be the responsible one.”
“Dude. I’m a teenager. Shit happens,” you say, a sudden burst of confidence from being around the group of four allowing you to speak out. Miguel puts his hand on his jaw, sliding his hand down. “Remind me to never team the five of you up again,” he mumbles, and Hobie elbows you. “Nah, we’re a band now. Sorry ‘bout it,” Hobie says, motioning everyone to leave Miguel’s sight. You all follow. When you’re out of Miguel’s office, Hobie bumps your shoulder. “See, that wasn’t all that bad, was it?”
He was right, it wasn’t that bad.
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morosluvbug · 15 days
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let me take care of you - haikyuu characters
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ft. kita, osamu, bokuto
⊹ genre - sugary fluff hcs
⊹ gender neutral reader
⊹ synopsis - reader is sick ohhh noo
⊹ A/N - period cramps are kicking my ass so im projecting my haikyuu faves taking care of me please help.
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. shinsuke kita
"Your troubles are mine, let me take care of everything."
he is the best at taking care of you no contest, and knows exactly what to do and what your recovery timeline will look like.
he is a tiny bit scared of getting sick. the man has a routine he needs to follow and cannot allow himself to get sick!
still so attentive though, he will just be approaching with a mask. loves you too much to stay away!!
has tea constantly running, a meal schedule planned out, and will not let you leave the bed unless it is crucial to your health to go on walks to rebuild strength.
still has to attend to the rice farm!! but makes sure you are okay before he leaves and frequently checks in when he gets the chance.
very honest about the timeline of your recovery, especially if it's a nasty virus. but praises you so much, will constantly soothe your worries and tell you everything will be okay.
he just loves you so bad. he will soothe any muscle aches, prepare any cold/hot pads, do anything to make sure you are as happy as possible, and just wants to comfort you in any way he can.
runs you warm baths and will wash your hair and scrub you down, even going as far as helping you with your skincare (oh I need him). leaves you with his shirt since he will be gone most of the day.
will be giving you a sad puppy look when you're feeling particularly horrible. he just wants to take it all away :(
. osamu miya
"Give me your hand, we'll get through this together."
you tell him not to come near you, he still has a restaurant to run and can't afford to risk getting sick and serving people!
this man. he is not scared of getting sick. he definitely built his immune system through eating dirt with atsumu or something when they were little.
trust he will be glued to your side, he's the boss of Onigiri Miya! he's gonna take the time off and leave a detailed list of how to do everything for his employees, with his number left ONLY for emergencies.
if he does end up having to run to Onigiri Miya, he will be speed running getting down to the store, getting the issue solved, and running back home with anything you want as an apology.
you might be able to catch him on the phone with his mom while you're fading in and out of consciousness. he's trying his absolute best to treat your ailment :(
he will cook anything you want, tries to stick to a strict plan of soups and proteins but if you really want something specific he will fold automatically.
sits around and watches any movies or tv you want. he is so whipped he will run to get any sweets or takeout you want.
he will definitely call kita if he is really stressed about your health. he just wants the best for you and that comes before everything, even his pride.
not scared to kiss you or cuddle you, despite any protesting on your side of things to stay away.
he is so firm about you resting up as much as possible, this man will be sprinting down the hallway for anything as small as a cup of water.
overall, he makes the whole process really easy. will not allow any tears to be shed and wants his partner to be happy
. kotaro bokuto
"let me ease your worries, we'll beat this in no time! "
oh, poor bokuto. he has no idea what he's doing.
sad bokuto on the phone with akaashi and kiyoomi every five minutes. he loves you so bad but probably has 1) never had to take care of someone 2) has never had to take care of himself
if you live together at this point, he has anything that you've bought in the past. but if you're spending time at his place. oh, good luck!
he’s just a bit silly is all. knows nothing about medicine or foods you should be eating.
he is not scared of getting sick and DEFINITELY gets sick with you. but he isn't bothered at all, it does just mean more time with you after all.
he tries his best overall, will carry you everywhere (even when he gets sick) will try to cook and will entertain you as much as possible.
you might. have to sit with him in the kitchen while he cooks for you both. even if it's just him heating up canned soup and pouring it into a cup. please help him.
kisses you and holds you and and and
similar to osamu, he is wrapped around you the whole time, this man is glued to your side. he has molded himself to your very being. if you leave to go to the restroom he will be pouting. throwing a fit every time you leave.
he just tries to make you laugh and tries to comfort you :( capitalize on this moment because he spoils you so bad while you’re sick !! if you thought he spoiled you before oh no. he will be buying you any plushy he even thought you might like.
you want him to read for you? done. want your nails painted but are too weak? consider it done. want him to juggle random household objects for you? they might end up broken but he'll try.
overall: wants you to be happy. he’s so silly but so love-stricken that anything you want from him he will do.
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reblogs notes and replies are appreciated!! <3
A/N. first fic in a long time hope you enjoyed my shitty hcs ^_^
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rottindecay · 9 months
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𝐉𝐉𝐊 𝐌𝐄𝐍 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐆𝐄(𝐒)!
Characters: Gojo, Nanami, Itadori, Megumi ♡
🪦 . . 𝐙𖤐𝐌𝐁𝐈𝐄 ’s 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄 (1): im so into JJK rn holy fuck.
𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎⊹₊ ⋆
🪦 . . I feel like we all can agree that Gojos’ love language would totally be GIFT GIVING.
⭑ When he’s out and about and walking by stores, he would peak through those big windows these shops have at the front of their establishment to try to lure potential buyers in, Gojo would lay his eyes on something that reminds him of you. Something you wanted or needed. Or seeing you looking at a certain item in a store for a little longer than all the other items in the building.
He would smile to himself, Imagining you looking inside the bag and seeing what new thing he has gotten you, to spoil you rotten.
He dosent give a shit about the money, he has enough of that. But he will never, i mean never, get enough of seeing your face once you open his new present to you.
𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈⊹₊ ⋆
🪦 . . When it comes to Nanami, i feel like his love language would be ACTS OF SERVICES.
⭑ Just Imagine, youre already stressed out of your mind from all the projects you have to do for work, the cleaning, or something along those lines. Point is, you are stressed.
Nanami would notice this and his heart would sadden, seeing you all worked up. So gradually he would snoop around and find your planner and notice how full it was of stuff you needed to do. An idea would come to his mind, what if he did some of these things? You know, just to make your life a little easier.
You were at work, doing whatever you needed to do over there as Nanami stayed home. You thought he would teach more students at Jujutsu High like what he normally does. But he had other plans. When you walked back in to your shared house, smiling fondly to yourself as you saw all the rooms cleaned up. You were going to thank him later, right now you have to focus on all the other stuff you need to do. After a bit of searching you finally found you planner on your desk like where it always is. Once you opened it you saw all the stuff you needed to do was crossed out with a bright red line.
Once Nanami came home you questioned him about it and he nonchalantly told you that he finished it for you because he saw how stressed you were and thought you needed some help.
𝐈𝐓𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐈⊹₊ ⋆
🪦 . . i definitely see his love language being QUALITY TIME.
⭑ you guys could be doing anything, and he would still cherish the time he’s spending with you. It could be shopping, watching movies, trying cook meals together..
As i said, anything.
Anytime Itadori finds a place that seems like you two would enjoy going together, say the carnival for example. He would go to text you, sounding excited to see if you would go with him. Once you say yes Itadori immediately gets ecstatic that you agreed we to go with him!
Once you two arrive you guys go on various rides, eating some of the food they had over there and even playing those stupid rigged games they have at the carnival and Itadori is enjoying every single second he’s spending with you.
..okay maybe not when he lost to those carnival games because then you would have to console him saying that he did a great job, it’s the games that are rigged
But other than that, he absolutely loves to spend every minute of his day with you!
𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐈⊹₊ ⋆
🪦 . . I have a gut feeling his love language would totally be PHYSICAL TOUCH.
⭑ No matter where you guys are, he absolutely loves to hold your hand anywhere you guys go. Same with having his pinky finger interlocked with yours, or his arm snaked around you waist. He just wants to be touching you.
But when you guys are alone, one of the main things he’s obsessed with is cuddling you.
Let’s say you’re laying down comfy as ever on your bed once you see Megumi walk in through the door. He looks tired, you could visibly see the eye bags under his eyes. You greeted him softly, a smile on your lips but he didn’t respond. He just continued to drag his feet, making his way to you before crawling onto the bed and immediately spooning you. You let out a small giggle before wrapping your arms around him, asking him if he was tired which he only groaned to before pulling you as close as he could to his chest with his chin placed on top of your head. And with that, Megumi is out like a light, sleeping soundly with him cuddling you.
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mooneggtarts · 2 months
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Okay what I think about Alastor's mother and both her and Alastor's dynamic that affect him in general (PERSONAL HC)
Now, Alastor's mother; I don't think she's a shit mom, but I also don't think she's a "perfect angel" mom either. She's a mother with a lot of flaws of her own, either from her husband, the society's view in people of color, the year era they live in, or other things.
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My thought is that she probably killed her husband when Al was in an age where he doesn't even remember his father's face, but remembers clearly of what his mother did to his dad. And she definitely tries to tell him that what she did was wrong and should not be put as an example.
("Why did you do it if it's wrong then?" "I... because I..have..to... your father isn't a good person sweetheart" kinda thing)
His father *could* actually be bad, which drove his mom to the point of murder, remember the *red* on his mother's hands and on the body laying motionless behind her. (For a moment, Al thinks that red might be his fav color)
Because again, where does Al's sudden murderous tendency come from? I kinda suddenly thought how "your parents are your first teachers" and stuck with that. There COULD be a possibility that she does it to protect him, amongst other things. But it has been stuck in my head for a while.
Having only interact and living his childhood mostly with his mother made him a gentleman and easily/perferably befriended the ladies.
Now about his bitterness towards men, well, I don't think he's *that* bitter with them, considering we knew that he and Vox *used* to hangout before things went south, not to mention his respect towards Zestial. I don't think he knows how to even get along *well* or be comfortable with most males considering, again, his mother being the only figure in his life thing, And well, most of the male cast seem to not really like him, or like him *too* much, or generally doesn't make a good first impression. 
Though I don't think it stems mainly on how his mother killed his father in either defense or resentment of how awful his father had treated her. But I suppose it does involve in some way.
Anyways, I don't think Al's mom really pay any attention to Al's struggle and mostly perhaps told him to just "suck it up" kinda deal during his childhood (Im projecting so hard in this). Cause I think, with him being a mixed, in the 19's on south? Definitely would experience some bullying or being pushed away by another group, kids nonetheless.
Even when Al got home with scars and bruises, his mom would just told him not to fight back, to just take it, cause if he fought back then he'll only make the situation worse, and told him to just endure it and wait, that one day things will get more bearable and perhaps something would change into his favor. Not wanting her son to turn violent like his father, and taint his hands red like her's. Not wanting him to change.
(I have a feeling that the more he grown, the more he feel how.. wrong it is? A slight feel of uneasiness. The feeling of captivation, The way he felt he was held back whenever his mother lovingly embrace him (as if not willing to see him change or grow, afraid of the unknown to who will he became, not ready to lose him if he did, cause she had lost the man she once thought would love her))
I also believe she has that mindset where "big boys don't cry" or "boys are suppose to be strong", which could largely explain Al to have a hard time in expressing his emotions and bottling or repressing them seem like the easier way (which, ofc, led to him unmanaged to properly expressing his emotions- and would be quiet defensive with it). And explained as to why he roughs up the male casts more than the females cause by his view, again, guys could handle a bit of a rough-housing better.
And so for years he had kept his mother's advice, enduring and just let them do whatever they want with him, bearing the loneliness, bottling up his frustration and sadness, forcing himself to keep on standing tall upfront.
But things changed after his mother's death. Things are more confusing for him.
Cause he can recall the pain- he *felt* the grief, the moment when he saw her finally kicked the bucket, but suddenly it's different when it was her funeral.
For some reason he felt numb- detached, for lack of better word. Which I suppose what bothers and confuses him. For how quick he got over her- DID he got over her? He's not sure, he deeply cared and respect her for taking great care of him for years, but he isn't *suppose* to move on so quick yes?
I think that's a whole worth of spiralling breakdown of questioning himself that will never gain an answer of.
Then the house are too empty and too big for him, the first time living without the presence of his mother. Somehow, it felt both uncomfortable and... relief?
Guilt settles in afterward. Somehow everything seems a lot more suffocating than how things are when she's still with him. Like hoping that her lingering shadow of a presence would accompany him, but he doesn't want it to be near him.
I think he'd shut down those kinds of thoughts, cause it disturbs his daily living, and do what he was best at. Repressing everything, ignore them. And just go on with his life pretending to be unbothered.
It bothers him because, he believes he cares for his mother. Loved her even. But there is a part at the back of his mind where he felt... free. Like nothing was holding him back anymore. And thats what bothers him. And I guess at some point, he feels like an ungrateful kid. Cause his mother has done nothing but the best for him, the only person that ever cared about him too. And here he is, feeling a bit of the weight on his shoulder shifted after her passing??? What is wrong with him? 
I feel like he's in denial how the way his mother been teaching him had been wrong, and would DEFINITELY be VERY MUCH REALLY defensive when someone call her out on how wrong she is. Cause she can't be wrong, he doesn't (want to) believe that she's wrong.
I feel like the moment he make his first kill in his human life, and I believe, that his first kill could be either someone that bullied him or some guy that harrassed someone else (my thought went to mimzy for a moment but it makes good sense for that could be how they first met)
And when he painted his hands red, a short flash of image of his mother's first murder as well, and it dawned on him. He had waited all this time, that fate will turn it's favor on him. For years he held back, in the end, the only way for things to turn, is if he *himself* change.
Feeling a strong surge of power like never before. Looking at the harrasser's fear induced face. It felt *good*. To be the *predator* instead. How the tables have turned.
Emotions running through his veins along with adreline, there was guilt that he had disobeyed his mother, there was hatred (which feeds his guilt) how much his mother has held him back from this, there was an overpowering sense of addictive of how much control and power he has in the situation for the first time.
And he finds himself unable to let go of the feeling. Wanting *more*.
I think at this point, he is willing to let go of the love that held him back, he loves his mother dearly, but he is unable to stop breaking every promises and lessons his mother taught him. By then, he hopes, that his mother would forget about him in wherever her soul went. He doesn't seem to mind if his mother doesn't love him anymore, he finds it better that way, she shouldn't be burdened by him cause there is no way he will stop.
He doesn't care if that made him unloved (Love is what holding him back in the first place, held him captive, making him doubt, making him hesitant, pressuring him), or that it made him into a monster. Because for once, despite him drowning too deep into the trench surrounded by his piling up hatred and rage against everyone that wrong him, he can breath.
He felt free.
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heesdreamer · 2 years
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JUST BE
PAIRING ➩ sunghoon x reader
SUMMARY ➩ classic cliche bad boy x good girl reader paired for a class project but with a few modifications lol…
WARNINGS ➩ violence, injuries, sexual content, sunghoon is a dick head kinda, heeseung is DEFINITELY a dick head
WC ➩ 18k (almost dethroned skin on skin)
AUTHORS NOTE ➩ so this sat in my notes unfinished for months.. which i never stop a work halfway and im not sure why i did considering this flowed out of me after i picked it up again but it’s NOT PROOFREAD and mainly written at 3am i think you maybe know the drill if ur familiar with me and my work lol.. not my favorite but i like the dynamics and i hope you do too
College was almost too easy for you. You were constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, to get the mean professor or the class with they heavy workload that you ultimately failed when you couldn’t withstand the pressure.
But it hadn’t came and you were feeling extremely lucky that the universe had seemingly spared you, atleast for your first year.
You always took school seriously, maybe too serious according to some of your highschool friends but you felt pride when you got high praise and it calmed you to know your hard work granted better results.
Still, it wasn’t like you had become some grade obsessed monster who didn’t feel emotion outside of the urgency of a deadline.
Quite the opposite in your humble opinion. Another thing you prided yourself on was your constant good attitude. You liked to smile at peers in the hallway and help teachers tidy up after a long lecture. It made you feel good to be kind and bubbly despite the stress that sometimes ate away at you.
So it was almost an impossible sight for you classmates as they watched your current dilemma unfold, the other shoe dropping with a loud smack the echoed inside your head.
“Did you hear me Ms. Y/N? I said your partner for the semester is Park Sunghoon.” Your professor was croaking from directly in front of you, your preferred seating being the first row in the room.
You were sat frozen in your chair, hand gripped around your perfectly sharpened pencil so tight you could feel the wood croaking in your palm. You usual smiley face was blank and stony, zoning out into the space in front of you as you wished for it to swallow you whole.
“It’s not that big of a deal Y/N.” Jungwon, your closest friend, was grimacing as he looked at you, standing infront of you and titling his body so he could peer at your unmoving expression. He was waving a hand in front of your face like he was trying to snap you out of a trance.
“There’s no point in lying.” Your other, and more pessimistic, friend Riki was speaking now and you let his bored tone seep into your ear. “She’s fucked.”
This snapped you out of it, letting out a loud groan and slamming forward onto the table dramatically, Jungwon’s hand coming out just in time to stop you from slamming your forehead onto the hard wood.
“Okay let’s not get theatrical here.” He was sighing through a wince of pain as he wiggled his fingers against your forehead. You slightly lifted it so he could take his hand back before dropping it back down with another groan. “I mean how bad could it be? Have you ever even talked to him?”
You briefly considered these two questions.
How bad could it be? Try absolutely, without a doubt, entire academic career ruining level of bad.
His second question was a bit more difficult. You had technically spoken to Park Sunghoon on multiple occasions but you’re not quite positive he had even realized it was you he was talking to. He had a tendency to not particularly pay attention to the people around him, and especially not their feelings.
The first day you’d spoken to him was actually your first day in general. You’d walked into your first lesson with a bright smile, hair perfectly pinned back and clutching your books to your chest in excitement for new things to learn and people to interact with.
Said books you were clutching didn’t last more than a few seconds in your relaxed grip once Park Sunghoon entered the room, his eyebrows furrowed as he turned the corner before registering you were still standing there in an attempt to pick which seat you wanted. His large frame was smacking into your back and sending you, and all your supplies, sprawling across the floor.
He hadn’t helped you up, or even looked back in your direction to see if you’d been seriously injured.
Your next few interactions weren’t as dramatic or grand scale but you remembered each one and so did your friends, considering you spent months complaining about each and every single time he managed to ruin your perfectly good day.
“Do you remember when he said it looked like she had gum in her hair because she got those new hair pins?” Riki was remarking from your bed behind you, a slight amused tone in his voice at the memory of your angry red face tearing them out of your bangs at lunch.
“That wasn’t nearly as bad as the time he stole her essay idea, and then didn’t even do the essay.” Jungwon didn’t sound as amused as Riki did as he recounted the story. He was a sweet boy by nature, one of things you bonded over at the start of your friendship and he wasn’t the biggest fan of your classmate because of this.
You listened to them talk and felt yourself getting more and more agitated, something that was extremely rare for you to show visibly. You pushed your forehead deeper into the wood desk, wishing it would let you mesh atoms together so it could completely swallow you up.
The bad mood hadn’t subsided by the time your hangout was over and the boys were leaving your dorm, wishing you good luck in talking to Park Sunghoon.
Your current biggest problem was exactly that. Despite being almost certain you’d be doing all the project work yourself, something you didn’t mind considering you held doubt he knew a single fact about the subjects appointed to you , you still felt the obligatory need to extend the offer of working together.
However you were realizing now you had absolutely no idea where to find him. It was increasingly rare these days that he was actually in class, only seeing him sometimes showing up minutes after it had ended and talking in a hushed tone with the teacher. Those days you’d slowly pack your stuff into each neat folder, trying to catch a word of their conversation.
You never had any luck and then he’d be gone again, leaving your nosy curiosity completely unsatisfied.
You imagined you could send him a message on some form of social media but that would require following him first and the thought of him spending even 20 seconds in confusion about your sudden follow before you were able to send an explanation message made your stomach turn.
So you had decided that the next day you’d march into class and sit and wait for him after it had ended, unmoving in your seat and forcing him to communicate with you.
You’d gotten prepared the night before, running over your convincing speech and tightening your ponytail before you entered the classroom with a determined look on your normally bubbly face. Your plans were immediately deterred when you went to sit down and found him already there.
Park Sunghoon was not only in class but he was sat in your seat, manspreading carelessly with an extremely bored expression. You knew it had to be on purpose but you couldn’t recall a time where he’d ever paid enough attention to you to know where your seat was.
You faltered for a few seconds before annoyance took over again and you refreshed your attempt at a look of intimidation. You stomped your way over to the desk and placed your books down on it with a mild slam, wincing at the loud noise you’d accidentally caused.
He didn’t react to the sudden spike in volume but he slowly trailed his eyes from your books up your arms, stopping when he met your gaze to raise an eyebrow.
“I’m Y/N.” You blurted out and you stuck a hand in his direction, attempting to initiate a handshake. “I’m your partner for the semester.”
It was silent for a few seconds and you looked down at where he sat, nudging your hand forward awkwardly like he couldn’t see it directly in front of his face. He ignored it and watched you with an amused look on his handsome face.
“Why are you introducing yourself?” He was finally saying and this took you off guard, the confirmation he knew who you were both surprising you and irritating you further at the implication his previous comments and interactions towards you were intentional.
You huffed and brought your hand back down to your side. “So you know who I am?”
“Row A, always raising your hand. Tight ponytail.” He stretched out the word ‘tight’ and you frowned at the innuendo. “Lacking your usual cartoonish grin but, yeah, I know who you are.”
“My smile is not cartoonish” You were hissing through your teeth at him and he smirked at that being the only thing you could manage to deny, too honest to refute his other claims even when you were frustrated.
He raised his hands in mock surrounded and your frown deepened, an uncharacteristically clouded expression taking over as your worst fears were confirmed. He was going to make this truly difficult, maybe even impossible. You resigned to sitting in the spot next to him, one over from your usual place.
You could feel him looking at you as the professor began talking, sneaking quick glances and sometimes downright staring holes in the side of your head.
For once in your entire academic career, you didn’t participate in class even remotely. You let your worries for the grand picture distract you from learning anything small today, zoning out with your lips in a pout until you noticed everybody packing up. Somehow you managed to fast forward through the entire thing.
Sunghoon was standing at the same time as you and as you made your way out of the room, he stepped infront of you and blocked your path completely. You tracked your eyes up his broad chest to his face and waited for him to add on to your already terrible day.
Instead he was sticking his hand out, similarly to the way you did earlier whilst waiting for a returned handshake. However his hand wasn’t fully open, clutching a small sticky note between his fingers and wagging it impatiently when you took too many seconds to stare at it in confusion. The second it was in your grip he was turning on his heel, out the door before you could speak or read it.
You glanced down at the paper in your hands with furrowed eyebrows, taking a second to decipher what he’d given you so abruptly.
When you finally pieced it together you felt a small surge of hope pass through you, smiling softly as you left the classroom, clutching Park Sunghoon’s phone number in your hand.
——
The little ball of hope you’d been presented didn’t last very long, disintegrating into a handful of nothingness before you’d even really had any time to appreciate its arrival.
You’d swallowed your pride and sent Park Sunghoon a text, very formative and stern in a request for him to meet you at the library before it closed. He hadn’t replied but you knew he had seen it and for some reason you thought he would actually show up despite having no evidence to that fact.
“Still waiting for somebody Y/N?” The boy who worked the front desk at the library was pushing past you with a cart of returned books, finishing cleaning up before he could close.
“Yeah I’m sorry Jake.” You frowned slightly and kept your tone polite, feeling guilty for slowing down his process.
He smiled at you and shook his head like it was no big deal, causing you to smile in return and bow your head slightly in appreciation. You were beginning to think you should just pack up and go to avoid causing him more issue until you heard a throat being cleared from behind you.
You immediately tensed up at the familiarity of it and you turned around in your seat to see Park Sunghoon standing a few feet away, watching Jake walk away with a raised eyebrow and a curious expression.
“You’re late.” You spat at him as your face dropped and you sighed, spinning back in your chair and fidgeting nervously with the opened book in front of you.
“Are you nice to everybody except me?” He was ignoring your nagging and making his way towards the table, surprising you by sitting directly next to you instead of the open seats across. “Where’s that Y/N classic smile?”
You shot him a glare but couldn’t help feeling slightly bad considering what he was saying. It was totally against your nature to be rude to somebody, even people who didn’t treat you the best necessarily.
“I take studies really seriously.” You explained to him, trying to soften your voice “And I don’t have a classic smile I just smile like a normal person, unlike you.”
He looked thrown off by your sudden banter and let out a scoff. “I smile.” He immediately argued.
“No you don’t, you smirk. There’s a big difference.” You were closing the book in front of you and he gave you a mildly confused glance, despite keeping his nonchalant demeanor. “The library closes in ten minutes, I told you that you were late.”
“Can’t you ask your friend to have some patience?” His words confused you for a second before you realized he was referring to Jake.
You scoffed in disbelief and shook your head, standing from your chair and starting to pack your belongings back into your bag. He groaned like he thought you were too sensitive and leaned forward slightly so he was still in your field of vision.
“What did I do now? You’re mad because I said you had friend? Aren’t you like friends with everybody?” He was droning on in a bored tone as he watched you continue packing, waiting for you to take the bait.
“I’m not mad.” You shook your head and gave him a forced smile. “I am simply coming to the realization my semester partner has no care for other peoples time. I wanted to give you the opportunity to actually prove yourself for once during your years at college but it’s clear you’re not interested so I’ll be going now.”
You glanced at him once last time as you spoke and you felt a wave of guilt come over you again at the way he tensed and his jaw ticked at your words. You looked away quickly in shame and gave him a small wave as you walked away, nodding at Jake as he said he’ll see you tomorrow.
——
“You said that?” Jungwon’s loud voice was overthrowing the sound of your upset groan as he rounded his way from the kitchen. “Y/N, how could you say that?”
“What are you talking about man, its Park Sunghoon. I think it’s awesome.” Riki was chiming in from the couch.
You were sprawled across the carpeted floor in dismay, immediately calling your friends over as you rushed out of the library with teary eyes and guilt from your mean comment.
“I love you Rik, but you finding anything I’ve done cool let’s me know it was something terrible.” Your words were half groaned and he looked offended for half a second before nodding in acceptance.
“I’m going to have to change schools.” You were dramatically continuing on, tugging your sweater over your hands and covering your face to mumble complaints through the fabric.
Jungwon was joining you on the carpet now and slowly feeding you a strawberry he had been cutting up, like an animal he was trying to calm down, and giving you a soft shake of his head. “No you won’t have to change schools. You just need to see him and apologize.”
“That’s the problem, I never see him.” You were mumbling around the strawberry and your other hand was anxiously scratching along the carpet in an attempt to self soothe.
“Well I overheard from Jay that’s he’s going to that stupid frat party I’m going to tonight. I’m sure I could get the two of you in.” Riki was chiming in again from the couch and you vaguely heard Jungwon scolding him, mentioning how you’d never been to a party before and never would when you were suddenly sitting up.
“That’s perfect.” The speed in which you sat up startled the both of them and they looked at you with confusion. “I’ll go to the party and apologize.”
“What?” Jungwon was raising an eyebrow as Riki clapped excitedly. “You’re going to go to a party, Y/N what’s gotten into you?”
“Correction Jungwon, we are going to a party.” You were grinning for the first time that day, excited at the idea of having a good night and getting the chance to right your wrongs, not paying any attention to the way all of the color drained from your best friends face.
——
The excitement hadn’t lasted more than a few minutes after entering the door.
The first thing that registered for you, was how much you underestimated what a frat party would be like, assuming it was played up and exaggerated in movies for the sake of entertainment.
Turns out, it was shockingly similar in the way it visibly was out of control and stunk like vomit and cheap beer. Your shoes felt sticky against the wood floors and you tried with all your might to keep a grimace off your face. People were greeting you excitedly, some making drunk comments about your rare appearance at a social event but seemingly friendly in their surprise at seeing you out for once.
The smile on your face wasn’t a good showcase of how you actually felt considering you were slowly getting more and more overwhelmed and the night was barely beginning. You’d almost forgotten why you were there in the first place in your building panic.
Jungwon had stayed close to you the entire night, looking similarly upset and irritated but wearing it openly on his face unlike you who at least was attempting to pretend to be enjoying yourself.
He was practically glued to your back as he shuffled around the main area, avoiding the shoulders of tall frat boys and the elbows of drunken college girls flailing around the dance floor.
“You guys could atleast try to look like you’re not being held hostage.” Riki had at some point wandered away to greet his sporty friends but he was now circling back with a drink in hand as he leaned down to speak to you, an eyebrow raised in disapproval.
You furrowed your eyebrows and gave him your best attempt at a casual expression, nudging Jungwon to do the same awkwardly, both of you dropping into frowns when your friend simply let out an amused chuckle.
“I just need some air.” You were shaking your head and putting your full cup down on the counter behind you, gesturing towards your friends sternly. “Stay with him, I’ll be back.”
You swiftly made your way away from them, ignoring Jungwon mumbling about not needing a babysitter, heading towards the slider door you’d seen briefly earlier.
By the time you’d made it over there and thrown it open, you’d sent hundreds of wishes to the universe that nobody would be out there. It was dark out on the small balcony but from what you could tell, your prayers were answered.
Your hands were touching the cold metal of the railing as you leaned your upper half over it slightly, taking deep breaths and shutting your eyes tight to try to bring your nerves down.
It was easy to be social and friendly in casual spaces like a classroom, quick conversations in the hallways that held no substance or weight came naturally to you and made your head feel lighter after a heavy work load but you’d never been a fan of large dense crowds in intimate spaces.
“Please don’t tell me you’re about to start singing.” You froze at the sound of somebody talking, spinning around to see you had clearly missed the other person leaning against the wall of the balcony in your haste to escape the party.
Park Sunghoon was stood casually, ankle crossed over the other as he watched you from the shadows. Your eyebrow quirked up at the burning red ash hanging off his lip and he shrugged softly at your curious glance.
“Why would I start singing?” You almost snapped the words but reeled your emotions in, remembering suddenly that you were meant to find him and apologize tonight.
“Looks like a disney princess, acts like a disney princess… you do the math.” He was answering like it was obvious and you were regretting your plan for the hundredth time that night.
You ignored his obvious attempt to bait you despite your instinct begging you to ask him what he meant by that, unable to tell if it was a diss or a begrudged compliment. You were taking a step towards him awkwardly with a sheepish expression and his raised eyebrow made another appearance. “Listen Park..”
“Please don’t make me listen to an apology monologue.” He was quickly interrupting you and your mouth dropped open in disbelief, staring up at him with wide eyes. “Consider it forgiven, plus you weren’t exactly wrong anyways.”
He was looking at you intensely but you couldn’t quite place what his expression was saying considering how dark it was, only relying on the reflective light of whatever he was smoking to provide some clarity.
“Great, so I came to this stupid party for no reason.” You were relieved he had seemingly forgiven you despite the awkward tension in the air but now you felt more defeated, having wasted an outfit and an entire night that you could’ve been in bed comfortable and studying during.
You sat down on one of the chairs around the balcony with a sigh, half laying down in social exhaustion. He let out a breath that could’ve been a laugh and then he was moving away from the wall and sitting down in another chair across from you.
He was easier to see now and you scanned his outfit as he rounded into the chair, feeling embarrassed suddenly at his casual attire and tightening your cardigan around your middle to try to hide the obvious effort you applied.
“Are you implying you came all the way to your first party just to see me?” His voice was mocking but not particularly rude, regardless it caused heat to rise to your cheeks. “How’d you even know I’d be here?”
“Riki said…” You were mumbling as you shrugged and avoided looking at him, suddenly realizing how weird your whole plan could seem from an outside perspective.
“Your tall friend.” He was stating in confirmation and you nodded. You were slightly thrown off that he knew what your friends looked like, along with the fact he had either just assumed it was your first party or paid attention enough to know you didn’t go out much.
The two of you didn’t say anything after that for a moment, only the sound of his inhales around what you could now see was a cigarette and the low thumping of music on the other side of the glass door, breaking up the silence.
You were trying not to stare too hard at him but you found it weird he had accepted so quickly the rude things you’d said, sitting out in the cold across from you like you were friends casually taking a smoke break.
Park Sunghoon typically fell pretty high on your list of stress inducers, your other wise easy going days and personality helping you breeze through most weeks without any issues. So it felt beyond strange to be finding comfort in the silence that came alongside his presence.
It didn’t last long however, only extending around ten minutes before there was loud banging against the slider door. Sunghoon didn’t move, just carelessly glancing over but you jumped up out of your seat and smoothed down your dress.
Riki was standing on the other side of the door, his fist pressed against it from where he’d just been slamming on it. His sharp eyebrows were furrowed in irritation and you gave him a confused glare before he was gesturing over his shoulder to where Jungwon was currently in the middle of the dance floor.
“Oh wow.” You heard Sunghoon breathe a laugh from his spot in the chair, the sight of your usually uptight friend dancing around with a sloshing cup, throwing the both of you off. “That’s probably not good.”
“Yeah.” You let out in a rush, glancing back at him and then towards Riki again apologetically. “I should probably go.”
You’re not sure why you said it, feeling immediately embarrassed when he gave you an amused look and shrugged his wide shoulders like he didn’t require you to say goodbye to him.
You were stumbling away from the porch in a hurry before you could embarrass yourself more, the loud noises of the party immediately hitting you once you slid the glass open to join Riki in an attempt to get Jungwon home.
——
Your normal schedule was already in a complete disarray and you were one more mishap from breaking down, quickly moving through the halls with your backpack clutched to your chest so it didn’t smack against your back as you ran.
“Hi Y/N.” Jake was greeting you casually once you made it to the library, an hour past when you normally liked to be there. “Rough morning?”
You glanced at him from where you were bent over, hands on your knees and you tried to catch your breath. You gave him a small smile and nodded your head, sitting up slowly and placing a book down in front of him gently on the customer service desk.
“Any good?” He was smiling at you as he scanned it, placing it in his return pile and leaning forward on the surface so he could focus in on your response.
“Not sure if it’s your taste but I liked it.” You shrugged at him and you grinned and he nodded his head in understanding, glancing behind you momentarily.
“Your scary friend has been waiting for you I think, by the way.”
You were turning as you spoke, shaking your head at him in amusement. “Riki isn’t scary, he’s just…”
Your words trailed off as you followed his line of sight and quickly realized who he had been referring to. Park Sunghoon was sat at the table nearest to the entrance, leaning back casually and playing with his pen, his classic raised eyebrow as he watched you and Jake interact.
He didn’t say anything but he looked slightly amused at the way your mouth dropped open in surprise, faltering completely.
Giving a smile to Jake and a small wave, you hesitantly made your way over to where Sunghoon was sitting and placed your backpack down on the chair across from him.
“How’d you know I’d be here?” You questioned him with a slow tone and you watched his expression to see if he’d be annoyed at your lack of greeting.
“Library boy said he’d see you tomorrow.” He shrugged like it was an obvious thing to pick up or care about. “And it’s tomorrow.”
You gave him a questioning stare that he held without any issue, slowly sitting down in your chair and trying to decide what approach to take to such a strange conversation. You hadn’t expected to see him again, surely not as soon as you currently were and not in the library.
“Would you rather me have not shown up?” He was cocking an eyebrow at you and you stared at him for a few seconds, trying to decide if he was baiting you into another argument or if he was genuinely trying to understand your current thought process.
You weren’t exactly sure how to answer his question, grateful he had shown up despite your previous out burst but also feeling extremely awkward after your weird interaction at the party. You’d had plans for what to work on today, a list of precise details and assignments you needed to complete, but your mind felt completely blank now looking at him.
He shifted in his seat and you realized you hadn’t answered him yet, clearing your throat quickly and offering him a small smile and a brief nod.
“I’m glad you showed up Park. We have a lot of work to do.” You were chirping out and he scoffed out a laugh at your sudden bright tone, putting back on your usual nice tone and expression. Your eye twitched at his disapproving laugh but you attempted to keep your cherry mood as you pulled open one of your shared classes textbooks.
You could feel him staring at you as you did so and your hands suddenly felt stiff and clammy under his watchful eyes, your movements awkward and clumsy.
“Do I make you nervous or something?” He was suddenly speaking again and you froze where you were bent over to reach the floor and dig through your backpack.
You sat to swiftly to glare at him, fixing your hair when it shifted forward into your face and he smirked slightly again at the familiar look returning to your face. He was leaning back in the chair casually and his arms were crossed as he looked at you, jacket pulled tight on his arms.
“Why on earth would you make me nervous Park.” You were whispering to him but the words were forced and rough, leaning forward with tour elbows on the table.
“Scared maybe?” He was shrugging like it was obvious and you gave him a confused expression, not sure where he would’ve gotten that idea from. “Just assuming considering your guard dogs have been staring at us this entire time.”
“What are you-“ You were shaking your head and trailing when he was lazily glancing over your shoulder as an explanation. You whipped around in your seat just in time to see two familiar faces hurriedly duck behind the nearest book shelf. You could hear Jungwon’s voice complaining in a whisper shout that Riki had bumped him on accident.
You were turning back to the table and groaning loudly, a sound you rarely made outside of your friend group and Sunghoon’s face almost twisted in surprise. You put your head in your hands and avoided looking at him in embarrassment.
“They’re psychotic.” You were announcing, your voice muffled by your sleeves and hair.
“They’re kind of funny.” Sunghoon was saying it like he was reluctant to admit it and you picked your head up to look at him in surprise. His expression remained neutral, as always, as he looked at you. “You guys should come to my friends party this weekend.”
Despite seeing him at the last party, it completely threw you off to hear him so casually mention going to one. Then it dawned on you that he was not only mentioning it, but inviting you and your friends and you completely flushed.
He was still just watching you with that same blank stare and you suddenly felt extremely nervous at his proposition. You didn’t take him as the party type, and you also didn’t know he had friends in the first place let alone ones who were social enough to throw parties. You were shaking your head before you even processed doing it and his eyebrow cocked again.
“We don’t really… party much.” You were awkwardly mumbling out and he gave you a disbelieving look.
“The little one sure seems to.” He responded quickly and you were confused for a second before remembering he had also been a witness to Jungwon’s adventure last time, the sole reason your conversation on the deck had been cut short in the first place.
“Do you always know this much about people?” You changed the topic to try and distract him from the fact you had completely lied about your friends recent habits, sliding your elbows further on the table so you were leaned over it a bit and giving off the impression that you were interrogating him.
For the first time since you’d met him, he looked slightly startled at your sudden statement. His responses were normally quick and witty but he didn’t say anything for a few seconds, watching you with a small hint of bewilderment on his otherwise stiff face.
“No offense but.. I didn’t know you even had friends.” You felt bad for making him uncomfortable and you quickly tried to change the subject back to his invite, thankful to see the tension leave his shoulders as he scoffed at your words.
“None taken. You wouldn’t know them anyways.” He was shrugging and you frowned, priding yourself on being social and friendly with people all over the school. “Different social circles.”
“Try me.” You were blurting out, determined to prove him wrong and show that you didn’t discriminate about who you were friendly to. He gave you a knowing look but you weren’t deterred, a smug expression on your face as you waited for him to name names.
He waited for a few seconds before sighing and sitting up in his seat a bit. “Lee Heeseung?”
Your shoulders dropped at the unfamiliar name, never having even heard it in passing and his smirk widened. He didn’t name anybody else and you were glad considering your ego was already bruised from the first one. He repeated the fact that you ran in different circles and you watched him curiously as he shifted again, checking his phone suddenly that you hadn’t noticed was abandoned on the table.
“Fuck.” He was mumbling under his breath and shoving the device into his pocket, pushing out of his sweet casually and giving you a quick look. “I’ve gotta go, let’s reschedule.”
“But we didn’t even-“ You were pausing in your objection when he was already turning and disappearing out of the library, your hands raising in bewilderment at his sudden departure before you’d even slightly started to work on anything. You let out a sigh and flopped back in your seat.
You sat there for a few moments on self pity before you heard faint whispers and grunts coming behind you and you groaned softly at the reminder you had an audience. Turning your head slightly to let them know you knew they were there.
“Get out here idiots.”
——
Park Sunghoon hadn’t responded to any of your text messages for the rest of the school week and you were absolutely fuming, not even able to control your expression as you walked between classes.
Students were sending you concerned glances as you marched through the campus, a deep frown underneath your tensed eyebrows, a direct opposite to what your normal expression was. He hadn’t shown up to any classes either so you couldn’t yell at him and release your pent up anger even if you wanted to.
“Jesus Y/N.” Riki was calling from somewhere to the side of you and he quickly matched your stride as he joined you, his long legs easily following along to your fast stomps. “You look like you’re about to kill somebody.”
“Trust me, I would be killing somebody if that certain somebody would come out of hiding.” You were spitting out and turning a corner sharply, having finished classes for the day and deciding to head back to your dorm instead of going to the library.
“I know you said no, but why don’t we just go to that party he mentioned then.” Riki was sighing softly and you could feel him looking at you in worry, more serious than he normally was considering how distressed you’d been as you took on two work loads. “He’s bound to be there right? I just wish it wasn’t Heeseung’s party..”
He was trailing off and you paused in your tracks, his arm bumping into yours at your abrupt stop and he turned back to raise an eyebrow at you in confusion.
“You know Lee Heeseung?” You were rushing out, shifting your books to your other arm so you could raise a hand and poke his chest accusingly.
“I know everybody dude.” He gave you a look like he thought you were stupid for missing the obvious and honestly you kind of were, for some reason only now remembering your best friend was the biggest social butterfly in your school.
You knew everybody, but Riki actively engaged with people and was a casual member of multiple friend groups, especially when it came to filling his weekends with various parties and activities.
“He’s trouble though Y/N, and I mean it.” He was shaking his head with a disapproving look on his face and you furrowed your eyebrows at him. You’d never experienced somebody that your friend didn’t like, the expression on his face causing a weird pit in your stomach to form. “That whole group is, I can’t believe Park is friends with people like that.”
The two of you continued to walk after agreeing to discuss it with Jungwon before making any decisions.
You felt extremely thrown off by what Riki had told you, knowing Park Sunghoon definitely had a reputation and an astoundingly stern attitude problem but you couldn’t imagine him hanging out with a crowd as rough as Riki was warning you he did. He seemed to be full more of teasing comments and selfishness than he was actual problematic behavior but the other part of you was confused why you felt the instinct to defend him.
You sighed softly and shifted your books around in your arms, pushing it deep into your mind for now.
——
“I’m telling you, I really have a terrible feeling about this guys.” Jungwon was leaning down to whisper into your ear as you stood in the small line outside the house the party was in, loud music already pouring out and deafening your surroundings despite the fact you were barely on the front lawn.
You glanced over at Riki to see him carrying a similar worried expression, unusually tense as he glanced around at the area you were in.
The energy was vastly different than the last party you’d went to, the same going for the attendees. Most seemed like they were a lot older than you and your friends, carrying a strange look in their eyes and regarding each other with tensed conversations that bordered on arguments.
Your sick feeling from earlier had returned full forced and you tugged on the sleeves of your sweater anxiously, regretting that you had followed Sunghoon’s lead of a casual outfit like he wore last time. Most the women at this party were anything but casual, wearing very little clothing and carrying themselves with a maturity you couldn’t even fake.
“We can be in and out, I promise.” You were tugging them down more to your level to whisper, a heavy guilty settling in at the fact you’d even brought them along. “I’ll find him and tell him to get his stuff together, then we can go home and watch Spider-Man.”
Your friends gave you soft encouraging smiles but their shoulders didn’t lose any tension and neither did yours, only growing more nervous when you were finally passing through the doorway. The three of you moved in unison over to the kitchen area and you turned to them once you reached somewhere that felt somewhat neutral.
It was small enough that nobody was actually hanging out in there, simply giving you strange looks as they passed by to refill their cups.
“You guys stay here and I’ll go and find him.” You were sternly telling them and Jungwon’s face curled up in disapproval.
“Are you kidding me? No way we are letting you walk around out there by yourself.” He was shaking his head and you deflated slightly, knowing the sight of you and your friends approaching to scold him would do nothing but drive Sunghoon further away from you and your overload of assignments.
“If I’m not back in 20 minutes, come and find me.” You were telling them as a form of compromising, raising a hand with your pinky stuck out.
Jungwon was sighing but eventually complying with your ask, raising his and linking your fingers together in a promise. You glanced at Riki and he gave you a small nod of acceptance, still carrying that dark expression that you weren’t used to seeing.
You were readying yourself before pushing back out into the main are, taking a deep breath and adjusting your skirt before heading back out through the door and scanning the general area.
It only took a few seconds before somebody was bumping into you from behind, sending you into somebody else and this continued for a few encounters before you were catching your footing and getting the memo that standing around like a lost deer wasn’t the right move.
You tried to look casual as you moved through the crowd but you knew your attire and demeanor gave you away upon first glance, possibly even passing for a confused highschooler in the eyes of the weathered people you were stuck in the sweaty room with. You were once again second guessing what you knew about Park Sunghoon, doubt running through your mind that he would take your demand as smoothly as he did your previous outburst towards him.
Luckily you were spotting him quicker than you thought you would, just starting to lose hope that you’d find him at all before you caught sight of his familiar bleached hair and leather jacket.
That familiar anger from earlier was building back up and you pulled your face into a determined expression, not letting him and his mysterious social life scare you off. You marched over to him and aggressively poked him in the back, faltering slightly when he whipped around with a heavy glare.
His face fell when he registered it was you and you figured it was just because he’d been expecting a friend or he was preparing for your lecture, not realizing that he had been mid conversation with a few guys who were smoking behind his back on the couch.
“How dare you Park Sunghoon.” You were starting off strong in your rambles, only slightly thrown off that his eyes were widening and his face was showing the biggest display of emotion you’d seen since you’d met him. You couldn’t quite read what he was feeling however so you decided to continue. “Do you have any idea how exhausted I’ve been this week? Not to mention looking for you absolutely everywhere like a crazy person, just for you to never even bother to show up.”
“Also.. your phone, I’ve been..” You were slowly trailing off, both because his lack of response and the fact somebody was now standing off the couch and approaching the two of you from behind Sunghoon. “I’ve been calling and you..”
“You must be the scholar.” The boy was cutting you off with a strange grin, wrapping an arm around Sunghoon’s shoulder and pulling him in a bit tighter to his chest.
You watched Sunghoon wince slightly and give you a sharp warning look, silently trying to communicate that you had made a mistake. You didn’t need for him to tell you that considering you could immediately feel the energy of the room shift at his arrival, the grin slowly sliding off his sharp face the longer you stared.
“You don’t know how to introduce yourself?” He was saying, a played up disappointment in his voice and he kissed his teeth before turning to look at the side of Sunghoon’s face. “Thought you said your girl had manners Hoonie.”
Your face flushed at the mocking question directed towards you and then more so at the phrase he’d used to Sunghoon. You’d obviously been talked about before considering the nickname he had called you and the implication that Sunghoon spoke on your behavior.
“Well I’m Heeseung.” He was smiling at you, a toothy grin that was immediately dropping back into that lazy smirk. It was similar to the one the boy next to him often wore but it felt a lot meaner, his eyes sharp as they stared down at you analytically. “And you’re Y/N… did you dress yourself Y/N?”
Your cheeks felt red and hot as you instinctively glanced down at your outfit, tugging your sleeves over your hands anxiously and parting your mouth to try and say something. You felt embarrassed at the fact he was clearly making fun of you, something you’d experienced before due to your bubbly personality but never so sincere and nasty.
It got even worse when you realized your eyes were starting to water, not meaning to cry but the overwhelming humiliation activating your fight or flight. You glanced at Sunghoon and he was watching you with a heavy look that you didn’t understand.
“Is she mute? You didn’t mention she was mute Hoonie.” Heeseung was squeezing his shoulders again and Sunghoon was finally moving a bit, shoving his arm back so the other boy wasn’t holding onto him anymore. He glared at him but still didn’t say anything, certainly not coming to your defense. “I didn’t say it was a bad thing sweetheart, it’s actually kind of sexy. The whole pathetic virgin look you have going on.”
He laughed softly as he spoke but you knew he wasn’t attempting to make a joke, his eyes scanning up and down your frame with an expression you’d never seen somebody have before. You couldn’t tell if he was actually considering you lustfully or if it was pure disgust in his eyes.
“Leave her be man.” Sunghoon was finally speaking now, a soft sigh accompanying his words and he nudged his friends arm softly.
“Sunghoon said you’ve been on his ass for days.” Heeseung was completely ignoring him and continuing, not even sparing the other boy a glance and keeping his stare firmly locked on your frame. “Hitting him up constantly like some clingy bitch of a girlfriend.”
You shot him a hurt stare but he was avoiding looking at you now, his eyes on his shoes or past your head as his friend continued to berate you. You looked back at the unfamiliar boy and shook your head softly, feeling some of your hair loosen from your pins and a tear finally break loss and stream down your cheek.
You hurriedly wiped it with your sleeve and Sunghoon’s head shot back up at the movement, face crumbling for a second before hardening back up when Heeseung glanced at him to see his reaction to your tears.
Something was bumping into you from behind and you were starting to turn and apologize, planning to use the distraction as a way to disappear from the terrible interaction when you realized who it was pressing against you.
Heeseung was immediately smiling again at the sudden arrival of your friends but Sunghoon tensed more, like he knew their presence would upset his friend even further and escalate the situation. Heeseung didn’t look at all deterred by the fact Riki was a lot taller than him, or the deep glare that Jungwon was sending him from your side where he was grabbing your arm softly.
“It’s been 20 minutes.” Your youngest friends voice was resounding from behind you, his tone lower than normal and you could feel his chest rumble against your back. “We have to go.”
You nodded your head even though you weren’t facing him and your hand instinctively came up to wipe your face off again. Jungwon was stood rod stiff next to you and radiating an anger you’d never experienced from the gentle and mature boy.
You considered saying something to Sunghoon, even as small as letting him know he was off the hook and didn’t need to help you with any assignments. One look at him told you that would be a mistake, understanding now what his harsh expression when he saw you had meant.
Heeseung was still making comments as the three of you turned to leave, whining about how the fun had only just started and other things that you tuned out as you let out a small sob and let your friends guide you through the crowd.
You felt embarrassed to be so upset over a few mean comments but you couldn’t shake the feeling of disgust that washed over you at his words and nasty stare, wiping your tears again and feeling the way one of your friends hands tensed against your arms at the movement. You felt guilty for dragging them out of their dorms for no reason, not even succeeding in getting your partner to cooperate.
“Y/N.” You could hear your voice being called as the three of you pushed out into the lawn but you ignored it when you realized who it was. “Please, just wait a damn second.”
You stopped abruptly because your friends did, Riki immediately turning around and approaching the boy in an agitated manner. You watched him press his chest close to Sunghoon’s in a challenge and you silently pleaded that he would be smart enough to not start a fight where you knew nobody and Sunghoon apparently had social ties.
Sunghoon paid the younger boy no mind, quickly giving him a unbothered glance before looking over his shoulder towards where you were standing and holding onto Jungwon.
“Two minutes.” He was requesting and his eyebrows were pulled forward in a serious expression, waiting for your answer. “Please.”
The rare use of the word from him made you feel hesitant to say no and you sighed before approaching them slowly, softly touching Riki’s arm and whispering for him and Jungwon to go down the street a bit and call for an Uber home.
You watched them as they walked away, both sending you concerned looks over their shoulders as they got further up the street and you tried your best to give them a reassuring smile. When they were far enough that they wouldn’t be able to hear your conversation, you turned back to Sunghoon and sniffled softly although you’d almost stopped crying by now.
“Let’s just get this over with then.” You were hurrying out, shaking your head and avoiding looking at him.
You imagined you looked like a complete mess, contradicting your typical put together demeanor. You’d taken your hair pins out and you could feel it getting messier as you kept running your hands over it, face red and puffy from being upset.
“I know I’m annoying and pushy, and I probably texted you too much but I was just freaking out with how much work we had to do and I didn’t know how to get ahold of you.” You were rambling off and pulling at your sweater uncomfortably, still not looking at him even though you could see he was taking a step forward.
“You shouldn’t have come here.” His voice was saying and your head shot up to glare at him in confusion, not caring that his expression was still pretty soft and not angry.
“Need I remind you that you invited me, asshole.” You spat at him, raising an accusatory finger but you didn’t poke his chest like you normally did.
“I shouldn’t have, it was stupid of me.” He was shaking his head and sighing, looking past you for a second before his eyes were shooting back. He never seemed to have an issue with staring (or glaring) at you but something about your puffy eyes and furrowed eyebrows was making it hard for his gaze to stay locked on your face. “My phone… it just wasn’t on and I didn’t think you’d come since I didn’t answer.”
You didn’t say anything for a few seconds, not really understanding why he was explaining himself to you considering he clearly wanted nothing to do with you and he’d never cared about your opinion on anything before.
He was just watching you with that same weird expression he had inside, almost compassionate but still guarded and heavy with something you couldn’t name and frankly, didn’t want to. You’d decided it was best just to leave this situation alone, Heeseung’s mean words still ringing in your mind louder and louder every time you looked at Sunghoon’s face.
“You don’t need to tell me this. It’s not like we’re friends or anything.” You were telling him and you stared at your shoes so you didn’t need to see his reaction to your words.
He didn’t say anything for a few beats and your eyes flitted back up swiftly to see why he had gone silent. His jaw was clenched now and he’d lost the expression that was making your stomach hurt, returning back to being hardened and emotionless.
“Yeah you’re right. We aren’t friends.” He was saying it with finality and your chest ached despite being the one to originally say it, his tone a lot more sincere than yours.
You expected him to just give up on the conversation and walk away but he was just standing there as he watched you, eyes darting around your disheveled hair and the way you were still continuously pulling at your sweater sleeves. You eventually couldn’t stand the tension anymore, along with the fear Heeseung would come looking for his friend sooner or later.
You took a deep breath before giving him a small sad smile, turning on your heel to go and find your friends.
——
“You should’ve just taken the day off Y/N.” Jungwon was whispering to you the next Monday, seated beside you in your shared class and sending you concerned glances every few seconds.
He’d been saying this since the incident at the party, telling you it would be best if you took a sick day before coming back to school. Especially to the classes in which you shared with Park Sunghoon.
You’d been ignoring his warnings, never missing a day before unless it was absolutely unavoidable and you didn’t plan to start because some boy had hurt your feelings a few days ago. You were wearing your usual attire and sitting up straight in your seat, smiling at everybody who entered and refreshing your perfume between lectures.
Besides, it wasn’t like you actually had any plans to run into the reasons for your upset. Heeseung didn’t actually attend your school, you’d quickly found out by pretending to be tutoring him and asking the administration office for his dorm number, and Sunghoon might as well not have considering he never seemed to actually show up anymore.
So you felt a bit thrown off, and regretful that you hadn’t taken your best friends advice, when you were walking into your next class alone and immediately being hit with the familiar sight of his bleached hair.
Not only had he come to class for the first time in nearly two weeks, but he was sat front and center in the seat beside your usual one. You’d faltered completely at the sight of him but before he could notice you in return, you were squaring your shoulders and forcing a bright grin onto your face.
You casually greeted the professor and a few of your peers, complimenting a girls new hair color and giving a small wave to somebody who had wished you good luck on an upcoming project. You weren’t looking at Sunghoon but there was no doubt he’d noticed you by now, the sound of your preppy voice undeniable.
It was nearly impossible to not look over at him once you sat down considering how close he was, his usual manspreading putting his knee far out into the isle so you had to squeeze past it to get to your own seat. You were sure he could feel the back of your legs brushing over his pants and you winced slightly before rushing through the rest of the tight aisle and hurriedly sitting down in your seat.
You cleared your throat and flattened down your hair, fixing your posture and preparing to make it through the duration of the class without needing to interact with the boy.
It was surprisingly easier than you’d expected, although you found yourself unable to focus half the time just from the knowledge that he was so close to you. Still, you didn’t sense the familiar feeling of him staring at the side of your head and he definitely didn’t try to speak to you. You felt bewildered on why he would even show up to class if it wasn’t to confront you or discuss your shared assignments, seemingly just listening to the professor as he rambled on.
Your confusion didn’t stop you from rushing out of the classroom in a hurry the second it was dismissed, breezing past classmates and not giving Sunghoon the opportunity to say anything to you.
——
“How could you possibly forget your phone?” Your youngest friends voice was hitting your ears, albeit muffled considering you were in the familiar position of burying your face into your carpet and letting out low painful groans.
“She was too busy running away from the campus asshole.” Jungwon was explaining, having quickly pieced together what had happened the second you’d crashed through the door in a panic.
Your two friends had already made themselves comfortable in your dorm before you’d gotten there, citing it was more peaceful than their own because you didn’t have a roommate like most students did. You didn’t pay them any mind before sinking to the floor like you’d lost all your bones and telling them what had happened in a series of short carpet spoken phrases.
“So? Just sneak in and grab it before they lock the main doors.” Riki was suggesting it like it was obvious and your head shot up off the floor, giving him a pleading look that he immediately deciphered. “Sorry Y/N, but no way. I’d get in trouble if I got caught, unlike a certain teacher’s favorite.”
“He’s right you know. Nobody would even think twice about you staying at the school late.” Jungwon was adding on from where he was sitting on top of your small bed and you sighed softly, knowing they both had a solid point.
Hence how you found yourself slowly slipping in behind a security guard through the doors to the school, hours after the last students had trickled out for the day and been forced to reside to their dorms or the 24 hour library if they wanted to continue studying. It was slightly eerie to see the area so empty, practicing your scripted explanation in case you were stopped by a less forgiving teacher or the campus security.
You felt a wave of anxiety as you moved through the halls, suddenly realizing the classroom might not be unlocked and if it was that would mean the professor could be right around the corner, waiting to interrogate you about how you’d gotten in.
Attempting to swallow your nerves, you continued towards the room you’d ran out off previously in the day. Park Sunghoon had created another problem in your life and you wished you could find it in yourself to be mad at him, still thrown off by his strange lack of bothering you he’d shown earlier. It was easy to convince yourself that you were just curious about him, nosy by nature and even more so considering how mysterious he tended to be.
You were slipping into the classroom swiftly, not touching the door in case somebody heard its hinges or noticed it had been opened wider. You let out a breath of relief that it had been left open and that the professor was seemingly not there, no sign of his briefcase or paperwork laid out on the desk.
The breath only lasted a few seconds, immediately being ripped out of you when you were suddenly being tugged aggressively backwards and almost losing your balance. You let out a small shriek of panic and surprise but a large hand was quickly placed over your mouth, stopping you from making another sound.
You couldn’t tell who it was that had grabbed you, especially considering they had pulled you into the small supply closet in the back of the classroom and the string light was turned off.
“What are you-“ You had smacked the hand off your face and were just starting to exclaim when a hissed shush was thrown back towards you. You immediately froze when you realized who it was, used to the familiar and aggressive tone.
Park Sunghoon was reaching up to tug on the lights string for a second and turn it on, showing you who he was with a raised eyebrow before switching it off again and shushing you once more. You felt a surge of anger at the fact he had pulled you in here, furthered by the fact that he seemed to think showing you it was him would calm your panic down.
Even more anger resurfaced considering that it actually slightly worked, relieved it wasn’t a complete stranger despite your intense confusion on what exactly he was doing.
“Park?” You tensed up when you heard the professors voice from outside the closet, quickly understanding that they must’ve been having some sort of meeting before you’d walked in and nearly gotten caught.
Sunghoon noticed your stiffening body, considering you were completely pushed up against each other due to how small the closet was. You could feel him looking down at you and you glanced up quickly, barely able to make out his features in the dark but just enough that you could see the warning in his eyes.
You gave him a small nod and his shoulders lowered in relief, knowing you wouldn’t give the two of you up. You weren’t sure if you’d actually get in trouble or not but you didn’t want to risk it, even the idea of the smallest mark on your record making your stomach turn with anxiety.
“That damn kid.” The professor was cursing under his breath and you could hear the disappointment in his voice at the fact Sunghoon had presumably ditched the meeting while he had left the room, glancing back up at the boy to see a strange look on his face.
At first you assumed he had been in trouble and was being scolded but due to the tone of your teachers voice, you imagined now it was something different. Potentially the two of them finally working some things out regarding Sunghoon’s absences and missing assignments.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” Sunghoon was leaning down to whisper in your ear and a shiver ran through you at how close he had gotten, flushing at your bodies natural reaction and hoping he didn’t notice.
“I.. I forgot something.” You were rocking forward onto your toes to be able to whisper it back to him and you furrowed your brows at the fact you were giving him an answer anyways, not sure why you felt you had to explain yourself to him.
He was standing back to his full height again to stare down at you and you watched him in confusion before feeling something hard pressing into your stomach. Your eyes shot downwards in a panic and you froze up when you realized he was holding your phone in his hand and attempting to pass it to you in the small space. Your eyes shot back up to his face in surprise before you were grabbing it and slipping it into your hoodies front pocket.
Another voice was suddenly appearing from outside the closet and you stiffened up enough to accidentally stumble in shock, nearly falling backwards and knocking into the various mops and brooms if it wasn’t for the hand reaching forward to steady itself around your waist. You froze at the feeling and glanced up to see Sunghoon staring up at the light and avoiding looking at you, eyes closed for a second in a wince.
He didn’t let go of you however, keeping his hand placed there firmly despite the fact you had regained your balance and didn’t plan on moving again anytime soon.
“Hope you don’t have anywhere to be anytime soon.” He was speaking again and you almost panicked at the fact he hadn’t leaned closer to be more discreet when you realized the conversation taking place outside was loud enough to be undetected if you spoke in a low whisper.
“Well luckily for me the pathetic virgin convention was moved to next week so.” You weren’t sure why you had brought it up, directly referencing what Heeseung had called you and the incident at the party, but you immediately regretted it considering the way his face tensed at the words.
You assumed he was upset with you for starting a petty argument when neither one of you could move or even really voice your actual thoughts upon a certain decibel, growing more nervous when he just sighed and didn’t say anything for a few minutes.
“I don’t know why he said that.” He was suddenly saying and you froze a bit at the fact he hadn’t gotten upset with you, instead sounding almost guilty.
“It’s not your fault I guess.” You shrugged awkwardly and looked at his chest so you didn’t have to see his face, reaching up to push some of your hair behind your ear that was falling forward. “You didn’t know he’d repeat the stuff you said.”
“I didn’t say anything like that.” He was saying quickly, his tone almost offended that you had assumed he did.
“You didn’t?” Your voice was laced in surprise and you looked back up at him with wide eyes, his eyebrows furrowed and his gaze darted around your face at the sight of you staring up towards him through your eyelashes.
“No, of course not.” He was shaking his head and his lip was slightly downturned but you didn’t find it as obvious as he seemed to think it was, never directly being cruel towards you necessarily but also never providing any evidence towards the fact he wouldn’t insult you behind your back. “I like… your sweaters.”
He awkwardly trailed off at the end, pausing between the words like he hadn’t mean to start saying them and he looked back up at the light like he was avoiding the way your eyes widened. You felt your cheeks flush at his attempt to compliment you, his hand against your side tensing like he’d forgotten it was even there and he was instinctively using your soft skin as a stress ball.
“Really? You do?” You were whispering before you even realized it, your curiosity getting the best of you but he tensed again and you understood you probably pushed it too far by asking him to reiterate what he’d said.
The door to the classroom was opening and closing outside the closet and for a second you thought both teachers had left considering the sudden silence but you heard somebody clear their throat and realized the conversation had just ended and you still weren’t able to leave yet.
Sunghoon was suddenly leaning back down towards you and you felt panicked until you remembered you had to go back to speaking into each others ears, much to your dismay.
“Yeah, I do.” He was saying softly and you felt confused for a second before recalling the question you’d asked him, another small shiver running through you at his low tone and confirmation that he was complimenting you. If he didn’t notice before, he definitely did not considering he was still holding onto your side and his hand clenched around you.
The air was suddenly heavy and suffocating, a weird tension settling over both of you at the fact you were pressed so close and he was touching you so intimately like it was a natural thing that happened before, like you hadn’t barely talked outside of petty arguments and your conflict a few days prior.
Nonetheless, you had to communicate somehow and your hands were going up to hold onto his shoulders, both for the sake of pulling him down towards you and being able to prop yourself up with less risk of tilting backwards. Once you were closer to his ear, you were leaning forward and you could feel his heart beating from where you pressed against his chest.
“Why didn’t you say anything then?” You were mumbling hesitantly and he tensed up slightly when your lip accidentally touched his ear, immediately dropping back down to your original height and feeling your face heat up at the contact.
He was looking down at you and you held his stare, a small pout on your face that you didn’t even realize you had. You were thinking back to the party and how silent he had been while you were being insulted, despite not being friends and knowing he didn’t owe you any defense or protection, you still felt weird about the way he had just watched it unfold.
He was sighing and shaking his head, leaning back down towards you and his hand flexed again, pulling you tighter against him as a result of the movement. “It would’ve made it worse if I did.”
You were confused by what he meant but you didn’t want to look up and see his expression again, a lot closer now that he had subconsciously pulled you into him. He was still leaning down towards you and you wondered if he planned to say something else or if he was just sick of constantly bending back down.
Your hands were still around his shoulders, tightening around his neck in a weirdly familiar way to keep yourself from titling considering how close your feet were together in the small
space. You tried to think of a way to respond that would give you some answers without prying too much and accidentally upsetting him again.
“Why do you hang out with him?” You were whispering back into his ear and trying to ignore the fact that you were basically hugging as you spoke to each other.
“He’s family.” He was hesitantly answering after a few beats and you were surprised he had even offered the personal information at all, also understanding why that connection would make the situation more difficult and harder to remove himself from.
You let go of his shoulders but kept your hands on his chest in case you feel forward, not even realizing that his other hand has also come down to hold your side and you had no real reason to be touching him, complete secure in his grasp without the added support. You were able to see his face again now and he watched you with a curious expression, seemingly unfazed by the close contact unlike you and your still red cheeks.
“Did you really say I’d been on your ass? That I was like a clingy girlfriend?” You were a bit embarrassed by the saddened tone to your voice but you were genuinely curious and hurt by the fact Heeseung said he’d been told that, not having any way of knowing about your excessive text if Sunghoon hadn’t told him.
“He saw my phone.” He was sighing and starting to explain but he looked extremely awkward, more so than you’d ever seen him and he was ducking his head closer to yours to remain quiet now that you weren’t whispering in his ear anymore. “I couldn’t let him know we were friends or else he would’ve messed with you… more than he already did.”
You didn’t say anything for a while, just watching him and overwhelmingly aware of how close his face was to yours and how if you were the same height, your noses would’ve been touching. You would’ve thought he either didn’t notice or didn’t care, if it wasn’t for the way his eyes were darting around your face and occasionally pausing on your parted mouth.
“So we were friends?” Was all you managed to squeak out, holding your breath and staring up at him as your lips curled into a small smile.
He was standing blank for a second before a sudden scoff came out of his mouth, an eyebrow cocking at your amusement and you felt slightly relieved at the familiar expression back on his face now. You’d weirdly missed the cocky look in his eye, much preferring it over the hard and vacant one he’d been giving you since you’d fought.
“Maybe we could be if you weren’t always so nervous around me.” He was mumbling back in a teasing tone and your stomach flipped at the slightly flirty hint under his words, never crossing into that territory with him before despite the strange tension always sitting in the back of your mind.
Your breath was hitching at the way he tugged you closer again, his right hand sliding a bit so it was against your lower back instead of at your side and he could keep you flush against him. You watched him with big eyes, confused and slightly anxious at the sudden switch in his demeanor. You felt slightly guilty for immediately wondering if he was just messing with you, preparing to push you away and laugh the second you responded to his passes.
His eyes were suddenly more hesitant looking however, like he was wondering if he had made a mistake due to your lack of response and you realized he was just as nervous as you were, just more skilled at hiding his emotions.
“I don’t make you nervous?” You were whispering to him and he immediately shook his head, staring down at you intensely. Your hand flattened where it was on his chest and you hoped he didn’t see how bad it was shaking. “Not even a little bit?”
You thought, for a moment, that you heard his breath catch in his throat but you quickly discarded that idea. Sunghoon had never shown interest in you before outside of this moment and you figured he was just not thinking clearly due to your proximity and the adrenaline from possibly being caught, still a man in a tight space with a girl regardless if you were meant to be enemies or not.
However, you couldn’t help but think of the fact he’d both managed to compliment you and also seemed to pay a lot more attention to your life and schedule than you’d seen him apply towards other people. He knew who you were before you introduced yourself to him, aware of your closest friends and the fact you didn’t go to parties much.
You thought of the fact he had shown up at the library just off the passing comment Jake had made about seeing you the next day, inviting you to a party with your friends. It had turned out terrible but he’d still invited you, opening the doorway to potentially see each other outside of school and converse in a more neutral setting.
His face was dangerously close to yours as he took in your question, silently urging him to admit that he felt similarly to you when it came to the confusing nerves and anticipation you felt every time he was around. You always felt there was something unsaid between the two of you, pushed aside when you started to bicker or one of you had to leave early.
“Your hearts racing.” He ignored what you had said and you frowned softly, glancing down to where your bodies connected. He somehow seemed even closer once you were looking up again and your eyes widened a bit, wondering if he was intentionally leaning down more or if his body was just instinctively being drawn in.
“I’m scared to get caught.” You quickly answered, lying through your teeth but you knew he knew that. His mouth was curling into a smirk and he squeezed your back again, hips flushed together. “I’m serious.”
“I like when you wear this skirt.” He was retorting randomly and your stomach flipped at the rasp in his voice from whispering, not expecting him to keep changing the topic especially when he changed it to compliment you. You didn’t even realize this was something you apparently wore often, just throwing it on with your hoodie before heading back to the school and not thinking twice about it.
“Do you always pay such close attention to me?” You were asking him back, a hint of confidence at the fact he was continuously proving his interest in what you did. You’d asked him something similar before and you recalled the way he had frozen in the library, not answering you and getting tense at the way you’d called him out.
He didn’t react as extremely now, his face keeping that small smirk as he looked down at you like he had expected you to question his behavior. You were confused by his silence until you realized one of his hands had left your body, only noticing when you felt his fingers playing with the bottom of your skirt. He wasn’t lifting it or moving it at all, just gently guiding his hand alongside the seam and watching you.
Your eyes were wide as you looked at him, feeling strangely vulnerable and nervous as he started to toe a line that you didn’t expect him to even consider crossing. The light flirting was already strange of him but now you could feel his rough knuckles accidentally connecting with the smooth skin of your bare thigh.
“You want me to stop?” He was pausing to whisper once he noticed your panicked expression, eyebrow raising as he studied your face for any sign of rejection or hesitance.
You thought about it carefully for a few seconds, wondering if you were still upset with him enough to tell him to knock it off and then be left to awkwardly stand here until the professor left and you could sneak out. He’d infuriated you since you’d met but you also never denied finding him attractive, especially when he was barely inches from your face and throwing you casual compliments like it was something he’d done before.
When you were softly shaking your head, signaling you didn’t want him to quit whatever he was planning to do, he still waited a few seconds before he was moving his hand again.
You gasped softly at the fact he’d moved it off the hem of your skirt, instead going underneath it and pushing it up more so it was settled in the middle of your stomach and he could grab your side again without having the fabric in the way. You were suddenly glad it was dark because you knew that it was raised enough that it would leave your bottom half completely exposed, the skirt already barely coming up mid thigh and definitely now revealing your underwear that it was pushed so high up on your body.
He paused at the noise you had made, looking like he was thinking for a few seconds before he was using his other hand to cover your mouth and give you that same warning look that commanded you to keep quiet.
You nodded against his firm grip but another squeak came out of you when he was squeezing your side, his hand so big that it covered your entire hip and one of his fingers was caressing dangerously over the elastic of your underwear. He pulled your lower half closer to his again with a small grunt and you watched his expression through your eyelashes as he touched you so carelessly.
His eyes were meeting yours when his hand dipped under the strap on your hip, waiting for you to give a small nod of permission before he was slowly pulling your panties down your body and shifting again so you could rest on top of his sturdy leg.
You made a small cry at the contact, practically sitting on his thigh now completely bare and you could feel his hand continuously stroking up and down the outside of your leg, almost transfixed by the feeling of how smooth your skin was. Your arms were coming back up to hold onto his shoulders so you didn’t have to completely press yourself onto his pants and you suddenly felt embarrassed by how exposed you were.
He looked slightly frustrated for a second and you realized it was because he only had one hand available, still covering your mouth with the other one. You reached up to grab his wrist and remove it, bringing it down to place it against your waist and flushing at the slightly surprised look he was giving you at the bold action.
“If I get loud; kiss me.” You were whispering into his ear suddenly and you could feel him tense at the idea, not sure if he was interested in the thought of it or against doing something so intimate. Either way, he didn’t object verbally and just used his two hands to slowly lower you back down onto his clothed leg.
“Anyone ever touched you before?” He was asking suddenly, glancing at your face with a hard expression and waiting for you to respond. One of his hands was caressing your thigh now, getting closer to your core every time he rubbed it and another shutter ran through you at his low tone and the implication that he was planning on touching you.
“Not there.” You were whispering back and shaking your head, squeezing his shoulder in anticipation and feeling a bit dizzy from the sudden rush of want you felt towards him.
“Tell me where.” His face was still hard as he watched you and for a second you thought he sounded a little jealous at the fact somebody had touched you before, his hand squeezing your side almost painfully and pulling you higher up on his leg.
“Just… just when kissing. H-he was… like.” Your face was completely flushed as you tried to explain to him what little experience you had, only ever having an eager high school boy carelessly grope your chest during a terrible make out session.
He seemed to assume what you were implying and you felt his hand leave your leg for a moment, sliding up under your hoodie and rubbing up your rib cage softly. You sucked in a tight breath and held eye contact with him as his hand reached your chest, tensing his grip slightly and his rough thumb ran over your nipple swiftly like he was testing your reaction.
You bucked forward a bit at the feeling, grateful you hadn’t worn anything under your hoodie but overwhelmed at the feeling of him softly kneading your chest and the fact he was staring down at you emotionless as you slowly got more and more overwhelmed.
“Did it feel good?” He was asking in a low rasp and you almost nodded, thinking he was referring to what he had just done but you paused when you realized he was talking about the other boy. “When he was touching you like this, did you like it?”
You were quickly shaking your head in denial, cringing at the memory of rough hands that didn’t actually care about you or your pleasure. Despite his tough demeanor and personality, Sunghoon’s touch was gentle although unrelenting in the way he continued to squeeze your soft skin.
“Feel good now?” He was muttering and you nodded softly, falling forward slightly against his chest at the feeling and your breath caught again at the way you accidentally pressed harder onto his leg. You were sure you were making a mess on his pants, dripping ever since he started to squeeze your sides and whisper into your ear and you felt embarrassed at the fact he’d surely see it later once you were out of the dark. “Say it.”
“Feels good.” You were quickly repeating, instinctively following his order when you heard how serious his voice was and you imagined he would’ve teased you for listening to him so obediently if you weren’t having to make as little noise as possible.
Speaking of noise, it was becoming an issue for you pretty quickly, especially as his hands went back under your skirt to help you shift your hips against his leg. Between the feeling of him underneath you and his big hands holding your hips tightly. He seemed to take notice of your struggle and he paused to watch you for a second, looking like he was conflicted.
You were about to ask him what was wrong, worried by the sudden apprehension on his face before he was abruptly leaning his head down to kiss you.
You froze in surprise for a second before quickly kissing him back, suddenly overwhelmed with the realization that you really wanted to kiss him. You’d tried not to think about it before, pushing it deep in your mind but he seemed just as desperate in the way his hands were moving again and cupping your face gently.
You both seemed to forget about the fact you were currently sat on his thigh, lost in the kiss and moving against each other at a fast and intense pace. The tension that was in the air felt like it had burst, completely mesmerized by the feeling of kissing him so deeply and you felt less worried about how intimate it felt considering he was keeping your face tight against his.
He leaned back a bit to catch his breath, staring down at you with a strange look in his eyes and you yelped slightly when he was suddenly moving his leg so it was back on the ground. You weren’t pressed against him anymore and you were confused when he suddenly fixed your skirt to cover you up again, thinking he had changed his mind and was stopping.
To your surprise, he was standing back up after helping you get dressed and he stared at you for a few seconds with a wild expression before he was eagerly pulling you back into a kiss. His hands were cupping under your thighs to pull you up higher and you made a small noise into his mouth with how desperately he was kissing you, almost bordering on romantic if you didn’t know any better.
But you did know better so you were slightly confused and thrown off by the way he was licking into your mouth like it was something he craved, holding you against him like he was scared you’d disappear if he didn’t keep a tight enough grip.
You were thinking of pulling back and asking him when you heard the sound of the classroom door slamming shut, both of you jumping in place and freezing. You’d almost completely forgotten you were even in your current situation, so focused on Sunghoon and his touch.
You were glancing back at him to see his reaction but his face was hard again and his hand was coming up to touch his swollen lips for a second before he was shaking his head, almost to himself, and pushing the door open. You were worried for a second that the teacher might still be there but you quickly realized the room was empty when Sunghoon continued to step further into it, offering you a glance back over his shoulder when you didn’t follow.
Still in a daze in the closet, you watched him in confusion. You didn’t understand the switch in his demeanor, his shoulders tense and his eyebrows furrowed as he glared at you like you were somehow the one being confusing.
Eventually, you stumbled out of the closet and attempted to smooth out your hair that he had completely messed up with his touchy hands and eager movements. He was just watching you and you saw him touch his lips again, your own turning down into a frown at the upset look on his face.
You figured you had been right and he didn’t want to kiss you, only doing it to keep you quiet and now regretting it. This confused you considering how into it he had seemed to be, more passionate and desperate than you ever thought he could get and the heavy look on his face when he pulled back to look at you, but you weren’t sure why else he would be so upset now.
“Sunghoon.” You started to say and he tensed at the sound of his name at your regular volume, not used to you calling him anything other than his last name. He was raising a hand to cut you off and you paused.
“Think of that as my apology.” He was saying in a stern and emotionless tone, not looking at you anymore as he spoke.
You felt your stomach turn in a different way this time, heart aching for some reason at the fact he had completely dismissed what had just happened and was implying he’d only done it as a way to say sorry to you. You stood there and stared at him in disbelief, not bothering to mask your expression or how much he had just hurt your feelings.
“Why would you say that?” You forced out, voice weak and you felt embarrassed at how obviously affected you were. He glanced at you at the sound of your voice but then immediately was clenching his jaw and looking at the floor.
He was shaking his head for a second before turning to leave out the door, leaving you standing there alone and trying to bring yourself back to reality. You felt dizzy from the sudden switch of emotion from him and the crash back down from your shared high, feeling like you were very much in need of a hot shower.
——
“You did what?”
You were sat in Jungwon’s dorm, his roommate having went home for some family emergency and leaving it vacant other than your friend. You’d made your way over there as soon as you left the school, not bothering to call first or go to your own room.
He’d swung open the door at the sound of your heavy banging, face coated with worry when he saw it was you and you quickly blurted out what had happened. It wasn’t Jungwon’s voice that was exclaiming however and you sighed when you looked over his shoulder to see your other best friend sat on his bed, jaw dropped wide as he paused mid pizza bite.
You stared at the two of them for a second before bursting into tears, falling forward into Jungwon’s arms and hearing the soft sigh he let out as he pet your head softly.
He gently led you inside and closed the door behind you in case anybody was feeling nosy, sitting you on the bed beside Riki and pulling his desk chair up so he could be near the two of you. You laid your head on your youngest friends shoulder and sniffled softly with a large frown on your face, embarrassed and confused.
“You hooked up with Park Sunghoon?” Jungwon was saying it slowly, like he was making sure he heard you right and you nodded softly in confirmation. “In a broom closet..?”
“What does hooked up even mean?” Riki was asking from beside you and you groaned at the fact he was there, trusting him completely but you came to Jungwon for actual advice and you knew Riki wouldn’t take it serious enough to offer any. “Like you lost your virginity? Can you even do that in a closet?”
“I’m not giving you the details idiot.” You glared at him after picking your head up from his shoulder, shoving his arm and ignoring the complaining groan he let out. “But we kissed and then he got all weird and just ran out, he said it was just his way of apologizing.”
Both the boys went silent after that and Jungwon gave Riki a loaded stare, looking back at your face and then to the other boy again and cocking an eyebrow. Your frustration grew as you watched them silently communicate something you didn’t understand, throwing your hands up in upset until their attention was back on you.
“In words please.” You exclaimed loudly and Jungwon sighed softly before leaning forward so his elbows were on his knees.
“Is there any chance he could like you?” He was asking and you were thrown off by how serious he sounded, even more so considering what he was suggesting. Your face flushed and you quickly shook your head in denial, not understanding where he would be getting that from.
“If I kissed a girl that I liked, that I was supposed to hate because that’s like my whole thing, I’d probably run out of a closet too.” Riki was adding on from beside you like it was an obvious thing and common knowledge and you gave him a bewildered look. He shrugged softly and patted you on the back. “I’m just saying.”
“That’s ridiculous.” You were mumbling but their words made you have a weird feeling, thinking about how intensely Sunghoon had kissed you. He’d completely abandoned the idea of touching you just so he could focus on kissing you gently, far more intimate and romantic than you’d expected from him.
Still, it didn’t make any sense to you that he would have feelings towards you. He’d never been kind to you and you weren’t young immature kids, you didn’t consider teasing and making your day harder a form of flirting and you were sure Sunghoon thought similarly to you.
You left them alone to head back to your dorm after hanging in Jungwon’s for a few more hours, making them both pinky promise to not bring up Park Sunghoon or anything that had happened revolving him.
You were only halfway through the campus back to your room, the sun having set at some point during your hysterical rantings to your friends and you were relying on the street lights on either side of the sidewalk to guide you home, when your phone was ringing inside of your hoodie pocket. The vibration tingled against your stomach and you flushed for a second as you remembered the situation that had resulted from said phone before you were pulling it out.
The name on the screen made you stop in your slow pace, faltering to a stop before you were completely stood still and holding the device up to your ear.
“Hello?” Their was a sharp question in your voice, not expecting him to reach out at all let alone so soon after what had happened but there was nothing but static on the other side. “Sunghoon? Park? Are you there.. I don’t have time for this.”
“My cousins keeper… ever the busy woman.” The voice on the other side was slowly crackling through and your blood ran cold at the realization it wasn’t Sunghoon, the voice slightly less familiar but still recognizable to you considering your previous interaction had been replaying in your mind.
“Why do you have his phone?” You were spitting suddenly and your stomach turned with worry for some unknown reason.
You didn’t know if Heeseung was the type to actually hurt somebody, especially his own family member but you also didn’t necessarily have a lot of faith in him and his questionable morals.
He was sighing over the speaker and not speaking again for a few heavy breaths, seemingly weirdly reluctant to talk to you despite being the one to dial your number in the first place. At one point you were pulling the phone off your ear to look at it in confusion, almost thinking he had hung up with how silent it had gotten.
“I need somewhere to bring him for the night.” He was causing you to jump when he was suddenly talking again and your eyebrows furrowed despite him not being able to see you.
“What? What the hell are you talking about?” You were starting to speed walk back to your dorm now that you’d started to understand the situation, practically jogging through the buildings with your stomach twisting in panic and anxiety at the thought of Sunghoon being in so much trouble he couldn’t pick up the phone and call you himself.
The line was silent for a few seconds before you heard the sound of the call ending, pulling it off your ear again to glance at your screen quickly and letting out a screamed curse at the fact he had hung up.
You still didn’t slow down despite not understanding what was even happening, why you felt the overwhelming urge to return back to your dorm but as you rounded the final corner you understood what the strange feeling in your gut was. You faltered in your step when you saw the body slumped in front of your door, knowing who it was without having to get closer and confirm.
“Oh no, no no.” You repeated a soft mantra of upset as you darted over to Sunghoon, dropping to your knees once you were near him and your hands reached out to grab him before stopping.
You didn’t want to hurt him and he let out a small groan that indicated you would if you touched him, hands hovering over his body and looking around frankly in case his cousin was still lingering around somewhere.
You didn’t see any signs of anybody but you knew Sunghoon couldn’t have been laying there long and they could be just off in the distance, watching you to see what you would do with the boy laying on your welcome mat. Your frown was deep as you finally grabbed on to him, ignoring his mumbled complaints and attempts to swat you away.
It took you a long time to manage to drag him inside, almost contemplating calling your friends for help before realizing what a terrible idea dragging them into this would be.
Eventually, you had him inside on the floor and you hands came up to frantically run through your hair in panic. You weren’t sure what you were meant to do, scanning over his frame to try and determine if he was injured enough to go to the hospital but you couldn’t see the extent of the damage through his layers and you paused as you watched him.
“Park.” You were kneeling back down beside him on your floor and whispering softly, nudging his shoulder with your hand and letting out a sigh of relief when he made a small noise of complaint. “Okay good, at least you’re alive.”
“Are you disappointed?” He was suddenly forcing out and you jumped away from his body in shock, clutching your chest at the unexpected sound of his croaking voice.
His head turned slowly in your direction at the sound of your shocked scream and you took a few seconds to try and catch your breath before you were frowning and leaning forward to shove his arm softly. He let out a loud groan at the feeling of you scolding him but you ignored it and furrowed your eyebrows.
“You idiot, I thought you had a concussion or something.” You spat out at him and you thought you saw his lip curl up for a second in amusement.
“Don’t be so sure I don’t.” He retorted with a wince and you noted his slurred words, leaning in to try and see if you smell alcohol on him. “Trust me, if I was drunk it wouldn’t hurt this bad.”
“What the fuck happened to you Park?” You were mumbling, still leaning over him on your floor and scanning his face to make sure he wasn’t going to lose consciousness mid conversation. You’d definitely have to take him to the hospital if that was the case, still highly considering it judging by how out of it he sounded.
“Family stuff.” He was answering after a prolonged silence and your frown deepened at the confusing implications, reminding yourself to question him more thoroughly later on. “Did I worry you?”
“By showing up at my door like a corpse? Yeah slightly.” You scoffed as you answered him and his lips curled up more, border-lining on the first actual smile you’d seen from him.
“You weren’t home.” He said after a few beats and his voice suddenly went serious again, soft and almost whining at the fact you hadn’t been here when he first arrived. You figured he was only acting this way because he was out of it and not thinking clearly, his hand extending in your direction and twitching a few times being more proof behind that thought.
You stared at it before eventually giving in and taking it in yours gently, feeling the way he immediately squeezed them together in relief and your frown deepened as he looked at you again.
“You always look so sad around me.” He was continuing on and his eyes were going in all directions around your face, having trouble focusing on any specific part. His voice was weirdly saddened and your heart thumped uncomfortably at the fact he was lacking a filter currently. “Not anyone else, with them you’re smiling and laughing. Just around me.”
You didn’t answer him for a while, because you honestly weren’t sure how. You’d become accustomed to that sort of dynamic with him, assuming from the get go that he was no good and out to get you at all times. You hadn’t necessarily considered that your change of behavior with solely him would upset him at all, causing his lips to turn down in a frown.
You’d said before that you never found him particularly mean, just prone to causing unnecessary stress on you and disrupting your typically perfect schedule in a way that caused you to react before you thought.
“I’m not sad around you.” You were eventually saying softly and you found yourself meaning what you said, squeezing his hand and using your free one to push some of his hair out of his face. “You just confuse me.”
He looked like he wanted to say something but his mouth closed after a few seconds and he just gave a small nod, closing his eyes again. For a moment you thought he had fallen asleep before he was suddenly attempting to sit up, catching you by surprise.
You helped him maneuver his way over to your small dorm bed, taking off his shoes once he was laying down and trying not to think about how strange it was to see him in such a familiar space. Not to mention, the relaxed state he was in as he laid back against your pillows and breathed out a sigh of relief once he caught a hint of your scent.
It was hard not to laugh as you watched him, biting your lip to hold it in but occasionally offering him small chuckles when he kept glancing at you with a drunken look on his pretty face. It made your stomach turn to see the bruised adorning said face, his lip cracked and bleeding slightly and you could tell other areas were going to swell after a few more hours.
You wished he was conscious enough for you to ask him what had happened in more detail but you figured he wouldn’t answer you regardless.
His breathing slowly evened out after a few minutes of you trying to get him as comfortable as possible, bringing a cup of water and pain killers to your bedside for him to take as soon as he woke up. You watched him carefully after he finally dozed off and you considered laying on the floor for a moment before you sighed and climbed into bed beside him, figuring it was the least he could allow considering he had shown up on your doorstep so late after running out on you.
“Night Park.” You were mumbling it more to yourself, curling over on your side and trying to avoid touching him as much as possible, letting yourself drift off to sleep.
——
You woke up in a panic at the realization somebody was wrapped around you, completely forgetting your current situation.
You only calmed down when you heard him softly groan in protest, feeling his big hand that was currently thrown over your side, squeeze softly to try and remind you that it was just him in your bed.
Just Park Sunghoon in your bed… half asleep with his arm wrapped around your stomach only a few hours after you’d had an intense make out session in a broom closet. You laid back flat and held your breath as you considered getting out of bed to avoid his touch, stopping when you realized his breathing was quieter now and your abrupt wake up had also taken him out of his deep sleep.
“Sorry.” You mumbled, shifting uncomfortably at the feeling of his fingers flexing against your skin. Your shirt had ridden up in the night and he could feel your warm skin underneath his rough palm.
“It’s okay.” He was whispering back and you felt a bit dizzy at how close his voice was to you, his breath fanning across your neck. You waited for him to remove his hand now that he was more alert, but quickly realized he didn’t plan to when his thumb gently swiped over your hip bone. “I’m sorry too.”
You hadn’t expected to hear the words from him, not sure if he was talking about being dropped off here and interrupting your night or about what had happened in the classroom. You didn’t want to question him, hoping it applied to both and that he genuinely meant it.
He was taking a deep breath when you shifted carefully backwards, letting his chest hit your back and feeling your heart race when his hand was sliding forward to rest gently over your stomach. You were spooning now, far more intimate than you’d foreseen the two of you ever being but you wanted to somehow communicate your forgiveness to him without having to voice it.
“You remember anything?” You asked him carefully, not sure if it was too early to cross that line yet or if he was expecting it.
“Just you.” He whispered back and the words felt heavy, his chest vibrating against your back and your mouth downturned instinctively at the hidden meaning there.
You didn’t think it was completely morning yet, that weird time of the night where the room turned a soft shade of blue and you could hear the birds outside the small room starting to chirp and move around. You and Sunghoon laid in silence for a while but you could tell he hadn’t fallen back to sleep, his thumb still gently caressing your skin as he took deep painful breaths.
“Should we go to the hospital?” You were whispering after a while, voice soft against the silence and you hoped the inclusion of yourself in this scenario didn’t pass by him unnoticed.
“Not yet.” His voice was low and hoarse but it had more emotion than it normally did, sounding almost desperate, like he was asking your permission to stay here in this moment with you. “Let’s just stay here a little longer, just like this.”
His words were heavy again and you weren’t a stranger to the fact that you had a lot of talking to do, healing from the strange back and forth and multiple conversations that would definitely be somewhat uncomfortable. All this was weighing on you for a second after he said it, finding it more in your comfort zone to immediately tackle and issue and find a plausible solution.
You let this habit and anxiety fade away the best you could, understanding that there was time for that later and you didn’t need to pop the bubble you were currently in with him.
Right now, you could be nothing but two people laying together. You could turn off the words of your friends about his hidden feelings for you, set aside his injuries and your longing to understand what exactly had caused them. You didn’t need to be enemies or friends who didn’t communicate to each other properly, you didn’t need to be the person he left behind in the classroom and he didn’t need to wonder why you never looked carefree around him.
For now you could just lay here together and listen to the sound of his breathing, feel it brush against your neck almost in sync with his gentle touch.
For now you could just be.
N
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skitskatdacat63 · 3 months
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"From triumph to failure is but one step."
+ the usual
I love when I can include paper sketches in the process gif. It's very satisfying to see it progress from a very vague imagining of what was in my head to the finished project.
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+ version without text
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My favorite sketch was definitely the one where I actually put in words what it's supposed to convey. I wouldn't usually write that down, cause it's all in my head, but it was useful to do so when sending it to other people. I'll go into it more but here it is just as a teaser:
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Lmao first of all, I like how I was teasing "Spanish GP" art, but as per usual, it's just thinly veiled au art. IM SORRY, I'M NOT INTERESTED IN MAKING GENERAL POSTERS, THAT'S NO FUN! So instead you will get weirdly relevant matador au art. I like it a lot though, I was really shocked I was able to draw 3 different Fernandos, I mean even drawing one figure takes a lot out of me, but this was weirdly easy?? I think it's just the effect of not being burnt out anymore, and actually being able to draw with more ease makes me feel like a god.
Okay, so the text: "Fight or Flight?" I'll be honest, I don't even remember why I chose it, literally came to me in a vision 😭 But I think it's fitting with the narrative of this piece. Is it better to keep going on, keep fighting, or better to finally give up, and flee? Not that I even remotely think he should give up, but I feel like sometimes I can sense him pondering this very question. That was the big fear before he announced that he re-signed. Keep fighting and maybe, just maybe, you'll get the chance to finally go up against the bull again. Or accept it's an uphill battle and the fighting is going to keep getting more and more strenous, and maybe it's time to put down the sword. SORRY THIS IS SO ANGSTY FOR WHAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE "yayyyy home race!!!" Please forgive me <3
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I. Renault
At some point, someone pointed out to me that I had drawn all other iterations of matador Fernando with a sword, except for Renault Fernando, and that ended up feeling very poignant to me. In a bull fighting match, they really only pull out the sword at the last minute to deliver the killing blow. So I think it's important to never draw this Fernando with a sword, because it shows the unfailing confidence and stability he has at that point. He only needs to pull out the sword at the end, as a formality almost, there's no reason for him to keep his guard up at all times.
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II. Ferrari
Meanwhile this Fernando, he's considering his sword like he hasn't had to in the past. He's checking the sharpness, making sure in advance he can do what needs to be done. He's on guard, he feels like he needs to keep up his defenses at all times because he doesn't have that same amount of trust and stability anymore. He knows though he will be up against the (red) bull, at least that's never in question. At least there's the assurance he'll get the chance to fight.
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III. Aston
Oh, Aston Fernando....He doesn't know whether to take up his sword or finally put it down for the last time. While at least Ferrari Fernando knows he's on constant guard against the bull, this Fernando doesn't even have that assurance anymore. He feels like he can never put down the sword, just in case he gets the chance to strike the killing blow on the bull, which feels like it's growing more and more unlikely.
Spanish flag: ? Lmao this was meant to be something to celebrate Fernando's home race and it turned very introspective whoops. Also got the Napoleon quote in there hahaha, can't escape it!! Shame though there is no French gp anymore, if so I'd probably draw an unhinged thing for it :,(
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nonbinaryeggrolls · 8 months
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When Someone Tries to Touch Your Hair
JJK men x gn black!reader
I had this idea for a little while and I absolutely love it. As someone who has to literally fight off ppl with a stick to keep them from basically "petting" me, I thought it would be so cute to write about the JJK men sticking up for you
Warnings: Fluff!, no nsfw but MINORS ARE STILL NOT ALLOWED GO AWAY, angst in Gojo's, specified braids/locs/twists in Toji's, unwanted physical touch, I think that's it!
Starring: Nanami Kento, Toji Fushiguro, Gojo Satoru
MINORS DNI. AGELESS AND MINOR BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED
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Nanami Kento
Of course he remains calm, he's always calm. but trust, inside he is BOILING with anger
Kento adores your hair, it sounds weird but he loves watching you on wash day care and tend to your hair with such detail and precision. Apart of it is so he can learn to do it himself one day so you won't have to spend so much time doing it yourself
He's always buying the best products for you no matter how expensive he knows black hair care products can be.
Design Essentials, Creme of Nature, Mielle, jojoba oil, tea tree oil, hair masks, curling cream-- you name it (or even glance at it in the store) he's already bought it for you
So seeing someone disrespect you by even attempting to touch you makes him absolutely livid
Kento: "I don't know I didn't think it was all that great, the plot didn't really make a lot of sense." Kento said as you two walked out the doors of the movie theater.
Y/N: "What?! I thought it was good, you're always hating on superhero movies you're like an old person. Oh! the boba place closes at 9:30 did you still wanna--
"Oh my gosh I just have to ask who does your hair? It's so pretty!" A young woman around your age popped up from behind you guys, her intensity kind of startling you a little bit
Y/N: "Oh, thank you that's so sweet! I actually do it myself" you smiled and she looked at you in astonishment
"Really? Wow it looks like it was done by a professional, I bet it takes you so long!"
Kento's eyebrow raise and body stiffen in an almost defensive way, he was already anticipating what was coming next
Y/N: "Yeah, sometimes it can. It kind of just depends on how tired I am that d--
Your body leaned back as she reached out to grab the top of your head. Kento wrapped his arm around you and pulled you back by your shoulders, shooting daggers at the woman as if she had just committed an unforgivable act
Kento: "Please step back. You don't need to touch them to compliment them." he reprimanded and held a firmer grip on your shoulder. He wasn't going to yell at a woman he didn't know but he sure as hell was going to get his point across
"O-oh Im sorry I didn't mean anything by it. I just think it looks really ni--
Kento: "Then you can think it's nice from a distance, they're not a dog. Have a good night." Kento intwined your hand in his and led you away to the car. You looked up at him and a small grin grew across your face
Kento: "Don't look at me like that."
Y/N: "You're like a guard dog. Like a snappy little golden retriever." you giggled before planting a kiss on his jaw which he returned with one on the top of your head
Kento: "Cmon lets go get boba."
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Toji Fushiguro
Rage, Rage, and more RAGE
The anger that fills this mans body when someone tries to touch you is immeasurable, ESPECIALLY if its a man
Sometimes you have to calm Toji down when someone tries but its no use, he's already out of his seat and practically ready to kill
Toji is definitely someone who values his personal space, so he completely understood your frustration when you talked about how crazy it is that some people think its okay to try and touch you without permission
He's only seen it happen a few times, thankfully most people had common sense. But there was always that one asshole that crosses the line
You and Toji were out on a late night supply run getting items for Megumis science fair project. You roamed through the aisles of the arts and craft store filling your basket with acrylic paint, styrofoam blocks, construction paper and glue sticks
Toji: "What kind of fifth grader does a science project on soil erosion? Can't we just do something normal like a volcano or something?"
Y/N: "Are you gonna keep complaining all night or are you gonna actually help find everything on the list?" You turned around mad dogging him, both of you were tired and a little bit cranky and snappy at one another. Most of it was playful but some of it intended
Toji: "You look like a pig when you scrunch your knows like that." He chuckled attempting to pull you in for a kiss
Y/N: "You bitch-- Go get someone to open the spraypaints for us!" You said shoving your hand in his face and pushing his head back. Toji sauntered away to find the nearest employee to assist you guys
You stood alone in the aisle for a few minutes scrolling through instagram to pass the time until Toji came back, until a tap on your shoulder caught your attention. A random man, had approached you attempting to spark a conversation. Your eyes jotted back and forth around the area wondering where tf could Toji be and why was he taking so long to get back
"You got a really pretty smile you know that? Pretty hair too, you do this all by yourself?" He asked and took one of your (protective style)'s in his hands
Toji: "Now you..." Toji came up behind the man and planted a firm grip on his shoulder, "...are way too ugly and way too short to think they'd ever want someone like you to touch them. Don't you think?"
The man trembled in place at the vast size difference between the two
"I--"
He couldn't get a whole sentence in before Toji pulled him back by his hair then slammed him head first into the shelves next to him, making the man scream in pain. The star captured the attention of multiple employees and needless to say it wasn't long until you were being led out of the building by security.
Toji: "Did I do too much again?" He asked from the passenger seat, knowing full well he didn't regret his actions
Y/N: "We just got banned from the store, what do you think Toji?"
Toji: "Are you mad at me?"
Y/N: "Yes I'm mad!"
Toji: "Mm. The blush on your face doesn't look like someone who'd be mad at me." He grinned and you tried to hide the smile that started to form
Y/N: "Shut the fuck up."
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Gojo Satoru
Gojo unfortunately was very ignorant to the topic at first
Maybe it was a cultural difference but when you told him people would ask to touch your hair he thought it wasn’t that big of a deal
“If someone admired your hair so much that they want to get close to it shouldn’t that be a compliment to you? It’s like they’re complimenting an artist for their artwork right? I don’t really see the harm in that, I touch Getos hair all the time and he's fine with it.” He said once before
Nonetheless it led to a very heated argument
He didn’t understand all the fuss around it, that was until he saw it actually happen
Seeing how physically uncomfortable you get when someone you don’t know tries to “pet” you put it all in perspective for him
Y/N: “Gojo, hurry we’re gonna miss the train!” You shouted as you ran through the subway station
Gojo: “I’m coming slow down! I don’t wanna drop anything.” He followed closely behind carrying the other bags of groceries you guys got from the farmers market
You both managed to slip through the train doors in time before it departed. You two managed to find two seats by the window, it was a preferred spot that way you both could gaze upon the countryside greenery as you passed on your way back to the city. Gojo leaned against the window and you leaned against his shoulder, the both of you trying to get some rest after a full day of walking.
The train stopped at its next spot to let on a few more passengers and a tap on your shoulder shook you out of your rest.
“Can i touch your hair?” a young woman behind you asked, but she had already reached out her hand before you could even answer. You pulled back before her hand could touch you
“Oh, um no please don’t do that…” you awkwardly said and turned back around. You looked over at Gojo who you know heard everything but was undermining the situation yet again
Gojo: “Calm down she didn’t mean anything by it, go back to sleep.” He dismissed you, not even bothering to open his eyes as he still laid against the window. You let out a low scoff and laid back against your seat instead of Gojos shoulder like you were before
The next few minutes we’re quiet as you dozed back off until you heard a loud camera click and could hear the girl frantically trying to turn the volume down
Y/N: “Did you just take a picture of me?”
“Oh it wasn't a bad one I was just sending your hairstyle to my friend I think it’s cute.”
Y/N: “I don’t care. Don’t take a fucking picture of me if—
“I didn’t even touch you so calm the fuck down…this is why no body likes to compliment you people anyways. You take everything too goddamn seriously.” she muttered the last bit under her breath but still loud enough to pick up. This sentence being the one that finally caught Gojos attention
Gojo: “What was that?” He stood up towering over the young woman
“I-I didn’t say anyth— I’m s-sor—
Gojo: “Shut up. Delete it. Now.” His eyes pierced through her and she scrambled to reopen her camera and delete the photos. She flipped the phone towards his face to show that they were no longer in her folder
Gojo: “Now go to a different seat. And if you touch them against i’ll smash that stupid fucking phone into the fucking concrete.” The young woman ran from her seat to the other side of the train as quickly as possible and Gojo sat back down. He attempted to put his arm around you but you wanted no part in it, for the next 30 minutes you ignored every attempt he made to get a word out of you. Even on the walk home you were cold
Gojo: “Y/N if you don’t tell me what’s wrong I can’t fix it!” he said as you entered your apartment
Y/N: “IVE TOLD YOU WHATS WRONG BEFORE. YOU DONT LISTEN!” you yelled, something he rarely heard you do, “I told you countless times before that people trying to touch me is a reoccurring problem for me and what did you do? You belittled me and made it seem like no big deal. Why did it take someone being blatantly racist towards me for you to actually start caring? Why did I have to prove the problem to you?” He looked back at you with no words just a stunned expression as he struggled to find the right thing to say
Gojo: “I…I don’t know. I’m sorry.” you rolled your eyes at his lackluster reply and turned away to the bedroom
Y/N: “Whatever. I’m going to bed.”
Gojo: “Y/N, wait I—
you slammed the door in his face before he could finish his sentence
story belongs to @nonbinaryeggrolls
do not steal
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mewhenimanangel · 4 months
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cherry, eren jaeger
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—synopsis. you have a little more fun at jean’s party that you thought you would
—chapter 4 ౨ৎ
𝜗𝜚content!: au-high school, ballet dancer, teenage romance, black reader, underaged drinking, drunken makeout sessions, high school party
previous ౨ৎ next ౨ৎ
you yawned and stretched out your arms before rubbing a hand over your face.
a bad habit, you reached for your phone that was sitting on your nightstand. there was a text from eren - it was an address followed by the texts 'forgot to give you the address' 'you know for when you decide to come thru 😉' you found yourself smiling like a dork for some reason before texting him back, joking that you weren't going anywhere.
you clicked on lana's contact and face timed her. "hey" you said putting toothpaste on your toothbrush. "hey girl, what are you waking me up for" her voice was groggy. "are you going to that party tonight?" you asked her.
"yeah, i was actually gonna text you and ask if you wanted to come. who told you about it?" she asked you. "eren asked me to come" you told her and you could practically hear the smirk in her voice when she said "ohhh he definitely wants you. you should definitely come then" she continued "plus you've been like mad busy lately you need to come and get a little crazy"
maybe she was right, for the last month the only places you'd been were school, home, work, and dance. maybe you could use a break.
"fine i'll come. what are you gonna wear?" "that little black jean skirt i got from nando's in janurary. and maybe that cute little black shirt. you know, the ones that make my boobs look good" she told you. "oh, tryna look good in case connie's there?" you smirked. "oh shut up, but yeah of course he's gonna be there"
lana had a little crush on connie ever since junior year when they had to do a chemistry project together. you never really knew eren's group of friends but connie was always really touchy and flirty with lana, he was definitely into her too.
"anyways, ima go. i have a shift at one and my boss is gonna wring my neck if im late again." she sighed. "okay just remember to let me know when you're on your way, love you byeee" you blew a kiss to the camera and she did the same before hanging up.
you finished washing your face before going out into the living room to find your mom and enya on the couch watching bob's burgers. "hey sleepyhead, finally decide to join society?" your mom joked. "yup" you smiled, giving enya a kiss on the cheek to which she wiped off. "rude" you rolled your eyes.
you went to the kitchen to pop half a bagel in the toaster.
you went back into the living room to join them. "mommy.." you whined. "uh oh, what do you want?" she smirked. "can i go to a party tonight.." you smiled. she deadpanned "whose?" 
"it's jean's party" you told her. "ugh the kiersten's kid? he's such a troublemaker" she scoffed. "i promise to stay out of trouble, come on you know me. plus lana's coming" you told her. you knew your mom trusted lana.
you spent five more minutes begging her to go, going in front of her to block the tv.
"ugh fine you can go. but, no alcohol, no drugs, and no boys" she pointed a stern finger at you. "yayyy thank you so much mama" you smiled, going to give her a hug.
"that's not fair i wanna go to parties" enya groaned. "you're 12, sit down" you scoffed.
ʚɞ
you got out of the shower and decided to keep it simple with your outfit. you put on a white tube top and a pair of denim shorts that ended a little under your butt. you wore a pair of white adidas on your feet and threw on your jacket while you waited for lana to text you that she was here.
once she was, you said bye to your mom and went out into her car. "wait, lil pregame first" she handed you a pink whitney shot bottle. "how are you just driving around with this in your car? you're not scared you're gonna get pulled over?" you scoffed. "it's fine, we'll just drive a bit and throw it in some random trash can"
"ready?" she asked you as you untwisted the cover. you cheered and tapped the bottom before shooting your head back and downing the liquor. "WOOOO, okay let's go! the party's at some random airbnb" she said, putting the address in her gps.
it was about a 20 minute drive there, twenty minutes spent singing along to lana's music.
when you got to the house, lana parked her car about a minute away and you walked your way up.
connie was on the porch talking to someone when he saw you two walk up. "hey girl!" connie smiled at lana bringing her in for a hug by the waist. "what's up" he nod his head at you and you put your hand up to wave.
the three of you walked inside, there were a lot more people there than you thought would be - you wondered how the party wasn't busted yet.
playing on the speakers was 'love scars', there were solo cups and beer bottles everywhere, people dancing, some guy shirtless on a table dancing, there was a game of beer pong going, and people just scattered around the house in general.
"wait what should i do with my jacket" you asked lana. "oh you can put it upstairs in the master bedroom, that's where we're putting all our shit. nobody else is allowed in there but i'll make an exception" connie told you. not wanting to let you go alone, lana asked connie to lead the way upstairs.
you put your jacket on the bed, looking at everyone's stuff you spot the jacket eren wore sitting on the arm chair. you wondered where he was, you may have even been a little excited to see him.
"aight let's get crazy" connie said, grabbing lana's hand and heading toward the door. you followed behind them before stopping when you saw eren coming up the stairs.
you saw the smile that graced his lips when his eyes landed on you. he was wearing a black shirt with a pair of black baggy jeans. his hair was tied back in his usual low bun and he smelled like cologne and a hint weed. his eyes were low and glossed over.
"hey" eren smiled , standing incredibly close to you. you could smell his cologne and a hint of weed on him, the combination was intoxicating "hi" you looked up at his eyes.
lana gave connie a look before leading him downstairs to leave you two alone. "i'm glad you made it" "yeah, i had to beg my mom to let me come, she doesn't trust jean"
eren blew air through his nose "nah i wouldn't trust him either" he watched you for a second. his eyes trailed over your body, admiring the way your top hugged you, and the shorts that showed off your slim dancer legs. you were somehow glowing, maybe it was something you were wearing. you smelled so good, like a mix of vanilla and strawberries. your hair was coily and down a little past your shoulders. your lips were outlined and glossy, god everything about you drew him in.
"you look good" he smiled, bottom lip between his teeth. "you do too" you sized him up, arms crossing.
"you wanna go get a drink or something?" he asked you. "sure, lead the way" you grinned.
he reached down to grab your hand, leading you downstairs. your heart beat a little bit faster, this is the most you've ever touched. you liked the feeling of your hand in his hand, it was a little bigger than yours and he had a ring on his middle finger. you watched the slight vein that peeked through under the watch on his wrist.
he reached both hands back behind him to lead you and weave through the crowd to the kitchen.
there were a few people in there, pouring shots and eating snacks. "what can i get you" he turned to look at you. "nothing too strong" was all you told him. he nod his head and grabbed a bottle of pink whitney "this more your speed?" he asked. "pink whitney does not fall under the category of 'nothing too strong'" you joked. "but sure" you said and he poured it in a shot glass.
he handed it to you and watched as you downed it in a few seconds. "you want another?" he asked you. "sure" you told him as he grabbed another shot glass for himself. "we'll do this one together" he poured the drink in the glasses.
he reached out for cheers as the two of you tapped the drinks on the table before shooting them back.
jean, connie, lana and armin joined you guys in the kitchen. they were currently passing around a blunt that jean had rolled. you noticed that eren was somehow even more touchy when he was high. you were sitting on one of the island stools while he sat next to you. his hand grazed your thigh, tracing random swirls over your skin with his fingers. he would rest his hand on the small of your back, stare you straight in the face while other people were talking.
as the night went on, you met with lana again before she dragged you into the crowd of people that were dancing in the living room. you wound up drinking more than you intended, solo cup on its second refill of tequila.
recently you've felt like you've been drowning in your day to day life. maybe tonight was a chance to drown in alcohol instead, letting it take over your body and let loose.
eren sat on the kitchen island with jean and watched from the kitchen counter for glimpses of you through the crowd. he watched how you whined your waist to the song playing. it was so interesting to see you like this, you're usually so laidback, he felt like he was seeing a new side of you.
he's watched you dance before, but this was different, your movements were more carefree, wild, and almost sensual.
somehow you made your way on the coffee table and the people around you began cheering as you danced. you were twisting your body and whirling your ass around. the crowd was now chanting your name.
as much as lana wanted to indulge in the fun, she knew if you sobered up and found out you did this, you'd be pissed at her for not stopping you.
she quickly ran over to eren "can you help me get y/n. she's on the coffee table dancing like crazy. can you come take her down? she's getting a little too drunk" lana told him. eren furrowed his eyebrows before nodding his head and following her.
he shoved through everyone to get to you, grabbing your legs and holding you in his arms by your thighs, taking you to the living room.
lana turned the kitchen stools around and eren sat you down on it. "how much did you even have to drink" eren chuckled. you giggled "not a lot-"
lana cut you off "way too much" you playfully shot your middle finger at her.
"alright so no more for you, time to sober up" eren rubbed the top of your head, grabbing the water he was drinking from earlier to hold it by your mouth.
"guess princess can get a little crazy too" jean laughed. "shut up" eren rolled his eyes. "you feeling okay?" he asked, bending his head to look at you. he put his hand on your shoulder and rubbed his thumb over your skin. "yeah i'm good" you smiled at him.
while you sobered up, eren and jean started a game of beer pong. you sat at the side of the table watching the game. soon - connie, lana, armin, mikasa, and marco joined the game.
right now it was connie vs armin and eren moved off to the side. you were watching them play until you looked up and saw eren staring back at you. he was leaned against the kitchen counter with his arms crossed in front of his chest.
you weren't sure if it was the alcohol but his stare felt so intense. he didn't look away when your eyes met his, instead his lips twisted into a slight smirk that someone that wasn't staring right at him would've missed. you trained your gaze on his, waiting to see who would break first. the alcohol in your system was making you a lot bolder.
he smiled with teeth, placing his bottom lip between his lips. he nod his head towards the back door before slipping away from the group. you smiled as you watch him leave, getting the hint, but you decided to make him wait a minute or two.
you looked down at your phone to see a "you coming?" text from him. you tapped on lana's shoulder to tell her you'd be right back and she nod her head, telling you to be careful. you opened the door to the back patio - there were plants, a couch with a coffee table in front of it, and string lights decorating it. you were surprised no one was out here, it was so pretty.
it was a little cold but you braved it.
eren was sitting on the couch and smiled when he saw you come out. he had a joint in his hand and he was laid back in a manspread position. "you smoke?" you asked him. "nah, not often. you?" he took an inhale off it, blowing the smoke out through his mouth. "no, i never have" you admitted. "do you want to?" you nod your head "sure" and walked over to join him on the couch.
you sat next to him wrapping one leg under the other and leaning against the cushion.
eren moved closer and turned to face you put the blunt in front of you and instructed you on how to properly inhale it. "you ready?" his voice was low and his hand was held in front of your mouth, eyes not leaving yours. you nod your head and you wrapped your lips around it, trying to follow what he told you.
you felt the smoke go straight to the back of your throat and immediately coughed. you bent forward coughing as eren pat your back. you could hear him laughing though, "you okay?" he asked once you were done. "yeah" your voice was shaking. "wait lemme do it again" you reached for it. "are you sure" he chuckled. you nod your head and he gave it to you, throwing his arm around the back of the couch behind you.
once you were comfortable, you sat there for a while just talking and passing it to each other. you could feel yourself getting a little high, or at least what you thought it felt like. eren's arm that was around the couch was now blatantly on your shoulder, his thumb rubbing circles across it. the tension between you two could be cut with a knife, his low red eyes never leaving yours unless it was to look down at your lips.
you were now aware of how close you were sitting - your leg was laying against his, the other still underneath you, knee rubbing his thigh. his arm was basically around you and you were so close you could almost feel when he exhaled.
you weren't sure who leaned in first, all you knew was your lips were on his. he leaned over to put the blunt on the little tray in front of him. your lips pecked against each other until his hand behind you came to hold the side of your face, pressing his body against yours.
you put your leg across his lap and his hand came down to hold your inner thigh, just below your shorts. the kiss went from soft to sloppy and needy. you placed your hand at the side of his neck, pulling him closer. his tongue slid into your mouth and you jumped a little, pulling away. you looked back at him and he only stared back at you, eyes needy like if he doesn't kiss you again he'd starve.
you pressed your lips back against his and his hand on your thigh rose higher, almost touching your crotch. just as he did that, lana came through the door. you pushed yourself off him and jumped to your feet.
"oh! sorry to interrupt" she smirked. "but y/n we have to go now! my mom just called to ask where we were" she told you, tossing your jacket at tou. "o-okay i'll be right behind you" you said as she turned around to leave.
"um well i've gotta go now" you told him, all of a sudden feeling awkward. "damn okay then, i'll try not to miss you too much" he smirked. "yeah yeah, bye" before you walked away though, he grabbed your arm to spin you around. he held your waist and pulled you into another kiss.
"y/n let's go!" lana yelled from in the house. "bye"  you giggled. "bye" he smiled at you. you turned to leave before bumping your hip into the table. you rubbed the spot and awkwardly smiled and waved at him as you turned to leave.
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thefourchimes · 5 months
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okay, just gonna say this now before i start this post: i have absolutely no problems with alternate universes, go ham with them, go wild, you can have fun, etcetc, they're called alternate universes for a reason, after all
however. HOWEVER.
i have a problem when people say something should have happened in canon, when canon itself disproves or goes against whatever these people want
the reason why im bringing this up?
the whole thing with how some people keep saying mirabel should have [insert the usual things people say here, hate, slap, punch, left, get revenge, etc, take your pick, there's unfortunately a lot to choose from] the family. in the canon movie.
again, i have no problem with alternate universes and seeing them in fanfics or whatever, you do you, could be interesting to see even
but when you start saying this should have happened in canon, its just. no. no.
god, it just frustrates me so much whenever i see these posts and comments, the ones that said she should have gone evil or villain or hate the family and all that stuff
because mirabel herself loves her family. she literally said it outright in the movie!!! its not in her personality and character to just go against them and hate them and want revenge. there will be hurt and hesitance and some resentment after everything she'd gone through, yes, but outright hate to the point where she'll hurt them?? absolutely not.
not with her character, her love and empathy and understanding, the traits we see her show in the movie.
like my friend once said: mirabel "he loved this family. i love this family. we all love this family" would NEVER hurt her family
say it louder for the people at the back!!
and thats not all i want to rant about tbh...the real kicker on this one?
whenever this statement is added on top of it all: "if i were mirabel—"
well, news flash people who keep saying these things, mirabel isnt you. mirabel is her own character who has her own experiences and her own feelings. maybe you'll be able to relate to her, especially with similar experiences, but that doesn't mean you can just copy and paste your own feelings onto her and say this is what she should have done in canon because thats what i would have done!!
we all project onto our favorite characters in various ways, which is completely fine, go at it and definitely not surprising for a story about family issues, but when you start to project so much that you throw away the character's actual personality and characterization in favor of said projection? yeah...no.
thats not mirabel madrigal anymore, that's a completely new character...or dare i say, a self-insert for some people... 💀:////
yeah, im just so frustrated with this AAAAAAA 😭
but anyway yes.
thats it, really. again, AUs are absolutely fine but if someone starts yapping about how canon should have [insert whatever those people keep saying here] instead while disregarding actual canon and proper characters and personalities, im going to become violent
anywho...thats my thoughts on this, went on a bit of a tangent but
yeah
anyway bye—
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deltastra · 24 days
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My Thoughts on Sonic the Hedgehog 3 Trailer
ITS HERE. AFTER NUMEROUS RUMOURED RELEASE DATES, THE TRAILER IS FINALLY HERE. GUYS I DREAMT THIS TRAILER LIKE 4 TIMES THESE PAST 6 MONTHS I WAS GOING INSANE. SPOILERS FOR THE TRAILER BELOW!!
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THE DETAIL?! I LOVE IT SO MUCH. I JUST KNOW THE SHADOW ESCAPE SCENE IS GOING TO BE FIRE.
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Ok so I love how compared to Sonic's soft-looking quills which looks more like fur, Shadow's quills look more spiky and rough. It's so clear that they are parallels that even their designs beautifully contrast.
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"Shadow's story began a lot like yours Sonic. But where you found family and friends, Shadow found only pain and loss"
This gives me hope that they will actually adapt Project Shadow in its truest form. Especially seeing the G.U.N agents point their guns at Shadow and Gerald Robotnik who appear to be grieving. While I don't expect them to show Maria's death, I hope they at least imply it. (I feel bad for the actress but a lot of fans will cheer for her character's death because it shows that the writers care about following the source material lol)
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Okay so one thing that is different is that instead of Sonic being framed and hunted by the government, he is instead asked for assistance to track down Shadow. Makes sense for their universe given the first two movies. However, I do hope Team Heroes end up betraying the authorities and let Shadow escape.
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WE ARE GOING TO GET A NIGHT CITYSCAPE FIGHT I LOVE THESE TYPES OF FIGHTS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
ALSO KEANU REEVES SOUNDS GREAT AS SHADOW!!
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AND THE TELEPORTATION? I LOVE IT! Looks like they won't portray it as "Chaos Control" but it's fine I guess!
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THAT RUNNING ANIMATION ACTUALLY LOOKS MORE MENACING THAN THE GAMES WHAT THE HECK?! THAT'S SO WELL DONE!
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THE FIGHTS DEFINITELY IMPROVED BASED ON THE FEW SCENES WE GOT!
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Okay so this is giving me hope that they won't make Team Sonic work with the authorities. Looking at their faces, it gives me the impression that they took away their dad (possibly he is the one being framed?)
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Well Jim Carrey did ask for the fat suit! Looks like he's going full Eggman now!
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Bro they're doing this on purpose at this point. Man I love Agent Stone so much.
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OKAY SO I KNEW THAT HE WILL HAVE A MOTORBIKE CAUSE OF WHAT PEOPLE SAID THEY SAW AT THAT CON WHERE THEY PLAYED THE TEASER BUT MAAAAAAN.
HE RLLY PULLED UP ON SONIC WITH A BIKE.
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OH MAN THAT DETAIL
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AKIRA REFERENCE OF COURSE THEY HAD TO!!!!!
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OH HE LOOKS SO COOL IM GOING TO EXPLODE.
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THIS. This is why I love night cityscape battles. They look so beautiful.
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WAIT SO GERALD IS ALIVE IN THIS UNIVERSE...INTERESTING. I love how the actor matches Jim Carrey's Eggman!
OKAY SO FIRST OF ALL GUYS, GOD THIS TRAILER WAS LIKE 5% OF WHAT I SAW IN MY DREAMS SO IM HAPPY.
Jokes aside, perfect. I love this trailer so much and it was worth the hype. I'm so excited to watch this movie despite the few minor events that they changed in order to properly incorporate this story into the movie universe.
I doubt Amy or Rouge will appear but that's fine. Maybe for a post-credit scene I think.
Shadow is definitely the star of the show here. The detail on his quills, his voice, and his behaviour is all so good. I'm sure they'll give Shadow's character justice. I'm assuming Project Shadow will be the prologue in the movie before the title card drops but thats just me predicting stuff!
AAAAAAAAAAAAH IM SO EXCITED GUYS HEHEHEHE
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