#okay it’s not richi but it was nice to pretend

[skijumping-fam]

what is this

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

hi! can you do a ethan laundry x reader where reader is ghostface too please ? (with smut if it’s possible)

Request: Riley!reader who wants to get revenge on sam for dewey’s death. She puts on the ghostface costume and is the mastermind for scream 6’s murders

I need someone to recreate this gif with

Warnings: mention of murders, scream 5 spoilers,

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

After years of surviving the masked killers, your father lost his life during the last murder spree in Woodsboro. 

All because of Samantha Carpenter. If she hadn’t gone to your father’s trailer and asked for his help, he wouldn’t have died in that hospital corridor. He would still be living his quiet life as a retired police officer with a slight drinking problem and spend his days watching shitty TV while thinking of all sorts of dumb excuses to call your mother — and hopefully one day rekindle their relationship.

But now he was gone and you wanted revenge. Revenge for taking your father from you. Revenge for killing all hopes for your parents to get back together. Revenge for making your mother so heartbroken. 

You wanted to stab Samantha Carpenter and watch her bleed out. 

Once you got back to New York and started college, you crossed paths with other people who had the same dark urge. A grieving father, and his two remaining kids — Richie Kirsh’s family. 

‘’Quinn should go. She’s fast.’’ 

‘’Sam is strong,’’ the redhead reminded them, knowing her roommate better than everyone else around the table.

‘’Then Ethan should go.’’ You glanced at Ethan, sitting before you. ‘’Can you take Sam?’’ 

He hesitated. He was confident about the elder Carpenter, but what if someone else was at the apartment? ‘’What if Chad’s there? He’s getting close with Tara and Sam is not letting Tara out of her sight since the new wave of murders.’’ 

Chad could bring a challenge for Ethan. Amber was able to take him to the ground last year, but it was dark and she took him by surprise. You’d rather not take a chance. 

‘’I think it would be better if we went for Gale next,’’ Bailey said, not agreeing with your plan. ‘’We have to finish Richie’s movie—’’

The second victim was going to be killed using Amber Freeman’s mask.  The same mask that was used to kill your father. 

You slammed your knife on the table you were all sitting at, making the faux-detective and his son jump. ‘’She’s my mother, you sick fuck,’’ you reminded the older man, not letting him finish his sentence. ‘’You will not touch a single hair on my mother’s head, got it? It’s Sam we wants, not her.’’ 

Although they were crime partners, they were disposable. If any of them dared touching Gale Weathers, it’s their blood that will spill next. There’s enough rage in your small body to take them down.

‘’And Tara,’’ Quinn added.

You shrugged, not really caring for the other Carpenter sister. 

After everyone was dismissed, Quinn went back to her and Sam’s apartment and Bailey to the police station. You could see on his face that he was mad at you, but you were the one in charge.  

A chair screeched on the old wood floor and Ethan came up to you, a dark look in his eyes. He looked like a mommy’s boy in his preppy polo from the Gap. You didn’t understand why he chose to dress up in a ‘character’. All he had to do was use a fake name and pretend to be nice to Chad. 

‘’The way you talked to my dad gave me a boner,’’ he informed you, not even embarrassed by it. You glanced down, seeing the tent in Ethan’s pants. ‘’He might be okay with killing his wife, but I would never harm my mother,’’ you said. Your eyes shifted back to Ethan’s face as you grabbed his belt to pull him closer. ‘’Besides, I’m the brain of the operation. I make the calls.’’

—

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[sydcarmyfan]

Here are my 12 predictions for season 3:

1. Marcus will have a tough time at the beginning, but he will pull through and he may start thinking about leaving The Bear for a new start.

2. After coming out of the walk-in, Carmy’s fear of loosing Sydney will elevate, causing him to do everything he can to keep her.

3. The daily menu changes will cause a lot of issues. Tina will reach her breaking point.

4. Sydney will have what she’s wanted in the last two seasons: her own apartment and Carmy’s full focus, but she will start having doubts about staying at The Bear, so when Carmy sends her the partnership agreement, she will try to delay signing it as long as she can. She may not even sign it.

5. Richie is going to focus on his roles as a father to Eva and as a maitre d’, so he won’t have time to really meddle in Carmy’s affairs, but he will start to notice the connection between Sydney and Carmy.

6. Although they will sweep their fight under the rug and pretend they’re okay in the first episodes, there will be tension between Carmy and Richie that will reach breaking point. The Adamu-Jerimovich alliance is going to be so strong and it may be one of the reasons why Carmy wants to fight Richie so bad.

7. Natalie will give birth to a girl, and Donna will try to be there for her even though Natalie will be a little hesitant at first.

8. Sydney will have a love interest this season. It may be Luca, Connor, Kasama Bae, or someone new. Yes, Carmy will be jealous.

9. Regina King, Viola Davis, Angela Bassett or Whoopi Goldberg will be one of the guest actors in s3.

10. In episode 8, Carmy will finally reach his breaking point and unfortunately, he will say something that will make Sydney walk out of the restaurant. Everyone, especially Tina and Nat, will be angry at Carmy for Sydney walking out.

11. After making Sydney leave, Carmy will try to get her back by making a nice meal for them, but it will not work, because during their meal, Sydney will announce that she’s leaving The Bear.

12. In the last episode, there’s going to be a gathering so Sydney and Carmy will see each other, and Carmy will try to apologize to her again and finally confess that he’s in love with her. After his love confession, the screen will go black.

[ilongfor-the-arts]

Hi babey! Can I request a Carmen Berzatto x fem!Reader one shot? Reader is a friend of his or more of a coworker but she finds Carmy attractive and one day someone says something about him, just for a laugh, nothing really mean and reader chimes in with a “ I’d totally sit on his face”? It doesn’t have to be a smut, you can do whatever you want with this idea. Thank you in advance love xx

After Hours

Pairing: Carmen Berzatto x fem! Reader

Warnings: smut, language, face sitting (obvi), cumming in pants

Summary: *in req*

Word Count: 3.6k

“Okay Y/N, I gotta serious fuckin’ question for ya’.”

I rolled my eyes and continued stirring the sauce. I was aware that this inquiry would most certainly not be taken seriously.

“Hit me, Richie.”

Despite not having uttered a word, Richie laughed loudly.

Oh God, this was gonna be painful.

“Alright, alright, who do you think is more attractive, me or Carmy?”

I arched my brow and cast a glance over my shoulder. Richie's figure was leaning smugly against the counters, his arms crossed over his chest. The pace of the day was unexpectedly slow. Richie chose to focus his attention on me because, frankly, he couldn't go five minutes without bothering someone.

Hey, at least he wasn't yelling and upsetting everyone in a five-mile radius. I’ll take annoying Richie over screaming Richie any day of the week.

“Seriously? That was your serious question?”

I asked, frustrated that he tore my attention away from the sauce.

“I’m dead serious honey-”

“Don’t call me honey.”

Richie displayed his open palms.

“Alright, alright. Sorry, I forgot.”

I rolled my eyes again, bringing my gaze to the sauce. Staring at Richie for lengthy stretches of time gave me a migraine.

“Are you gonna answer my question?”

I pretended to ponder his inquiry despite already knowing the answer.

“Well, that’s difficult. You both are such charming and attractive men.”

My tone was thick with sarcasm. I mean, come on? Did Richie really think he had a chance? I glanced to my right, then to my left. I took care to be subtle so Richie wouldn't assume I had ulterior motives.

“I’d have to say, Carmy.”

“Fuck!”

He exclaimed under his breath. I chuckled through a closed mouth, scraping my spatula against the bottom of the plate.

“Was it close?”

“Do you really want me to answer that question?”

“That depends. Is the answer something I want to hear?”

“No.”

“Then no.”

The restaurant possessed an oddly tranquil atmosphere at this hour. The quiet chatter of voices resembled lovely white noise. I wished it would gently lull me to sleep. Even though a little frantic activity kept my mind sharp, I greatly valued quiet times like these. Unfortunately, my moment of peace was interrupted by Richie’s loud voice.

“Ok, but like, what does he got that I don’t?”

I managed to control the urge to roll my eyes. Instead, I opted to twist the knife.

“Well, he’s more attractive for starters.”

Nice. This sauce was coming together.

“Oh, come on, now you’re just bullshitting me.”

With a chuckle, he said.

“I’m a chef, Richie. I don’t bullshit.”

“What makes him more attractive?”

Jesus. After I answered his stupid question, I assumed the conversation would be over. I would not have humored him if I had known he was going to prolong my agony.

“He’s got nice arms, and nice hands, and nice eyes-”

Richie laughed. I grinned, pleased that I had irritated him. Call me rude, but Richie has been nothing but trouble for me since day one. And the fact that I was finally crawling under his skin made me internally satisfied. I was scratching an itch that had been bothering me for months.

“And, come on, have you seen his nose? I mean, it’s gorgeous. I’d totally sit on his face.”

Richie found that amusing, and we both laughed before being unexpectedly interrupted by Carmen.

I froze.

Jesus. I sure as hell hope he didn’t hear that last part.

He threw open the door to his office and sauntered confidently into the open kitchen, holding a clipboard and a pen in his large hands. I prayed his mind was truly focused on the inventory check and not our conversation.

Oh God, why did I say that? Now the only image clouding my brain was me, sitting atop his nose.

Shit!

Why did he have to look so fucking good all the time? Can’t he look bad for once in his life? It would sure help right about now as I was finding it increasingly difficult not to imagine myself cumming all over his beautiful face while he vigorously tongue fucked me.

Carmen slowly became aware of two sets of eyes boring into the side of his skull. He paused his scribbling to cast a glance in our direction. His beautiful blue eyes darted between us, meeting both of our gazes before tearing away to look at the other.

“Um- hi guys…”

He said hesitantly, seemingly unsure why we were both gaping at him as if he had just interrupted a serious confession. Richie bobbed his head.

“Cousin.”

I followed suit.

“Carmen.”

Carmen arched his brow and shifted his body so that his torso was facing us.

“Uh-are you guys alright?”

His gaze continued to dart back and forth between ours. Every time he captured my stare, my heart instinctively skipped a beat.

God, what kind of sick thoughts have I polluted my mind with?

“I’m great.”

Richie chimed in.

“I’m great as well. Uh-we were just talking about…”

Come on, think of a lie!

“...baseball.”

Stupid! Stupid, stupid, stupid! Thankfully, I was unable to blush as all the blood in my entire body had rushed to my core.

“Oh yeah, I was just tellin’ Y/N here about that cubs game last night.”

“Oh…”

Carmen’s voice trailed off into the tranquil air.

“Alright.”

His gaze landed on me, and he held it.

What’s he gonna say to me?

What’s he gonna say to me?

What’s he gonna say to me!

“Keep your eyes on that sauce, chef. Don’t let it burn.”

Right, of course.

“Right, of course. Sorry chef.”

Despite wanting to gawk at him a little longer, I tore my eyes away from him. He was most definitely suspicious, and the last thing I wanted was to make it worse.

“Richie, you can head out if ya’ want. We close in thirty minutes, and I don’t expect much more business.”

Shit.

I knew Richie would accept his offer. It wasn’t in his nature to deny going home early. So, with the exception of a few dishwashers, I'd be completely alone with Carmen.

Great, just great.

“You sure about that cousin?”

Oh my God.

Please stay.

Please stay.

Please stay.

I never imagined in a million years that I'd want to spend more time with Richie. But if he stayed, I would most likely avoid an awkward confrontation if Carmen had overheard me.

“Yeah, I’m sure. I think Y/N and I can hold down the fort.”

There was complete silence. I didn't turn around. I keep my gaze fixed on the sauce.

He most certainly overheard me.

Otherwise, why would he ask Richie to leave?

“Alright.”

No! My heart began to race. My hands began to shake.

Shit! I hadn't been paying attention. The sauce had begun to burn. The vile stench of burnt flour filled my nose. I cringed.

“Ah! Shit.”

I mumbled under my breath.

“Are you alright, chef?”

Do not stand next to me and breathe down my neck. That was the absolute last thing I needed right now.

He approached me, and his hot breath grazed my neck. Goosebumps rose along my skin.

Fuck.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just... accidentally burned the sauce.”

He glanced over my shoulder, his chin lightly brushing against my shoulder. My throat tightened.

“It’s alright. Don’t sweat it. Just throw it out and do it again.”

Fortunately, there wasn't much going on, or I'd be subjected to his piercing screams as he frantically bolted around the kitchen.

“Yes chef.”

I angled the skillet over the trash can, scraping every drop of burnt liquid into the trash.

“Good luck.”

Richie whispered when Carmen vanished from view. He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. I sighed in frustration.

“You’re the one that instigated that stupid conversation. I’m placing all the blame on you if he asks.”

Richie placed his hands on his hips. He was sickeningly arrogant. I just wanted to smack that stupid little smirk off his face.

“If he asks? You seriously think there's a possibility he didn’t hear nothin’?”

“Sh!”

I placed my finger over my lips.

“Why do you always have to talk so goddamn loud? He's out of sight, not out of earshot.”

“Sorry.”

Richie apologizes, his tone lacking sincerity. I didn't expect anything more.

“I sure as hell hope he didn’t hear anything.”

Richie noticed my tense posture and unconscious scraping of the empty pan. He chuckled.

“Relax honey-”

I glared at him. He cut himself off.

“Relax Y/N. He ain’t gonna fire you.”

I didn't respond. I returned the skillet to the stovetop and began remaking the sauce.

“But fine, if it puts you at ease, then blame me. He hates me anyway.”

"Thanks, Richie, you're a real doll.”

“You owe me one.”

“I don’t owe you shit.”

Richie scoffed. But he was far too cheerful to be angry. The subtle frustration quickly faded and died.

“I hope to see ya’ tomorrow, Y/N.”

“The feeling is not mutual, Richie.”

Richie leaned against the counter, catching my attention. I mockingly scowled at him, over exaggerating my exasperation.

“How’d you get to be such a saint?”

He inquired. He placed a hand over his chest, as if moved by my insult.

“It’s a God given talent, Richie, something you wouldn’t know about.”

He recoiled, pretending to be hurt.

“I would be offended, but I’m the one that gets to go home while you gotta face my cousin.”

I quickly glanced to the left to ensure Carmen was still out of sight.

“Don’t rub it in.”

Richie chuckled.

“Alright, goodbye for real this time.”

I didn't respond. Carmen reappeared shortly after Richie had left. He stationed himself only two feet away from me.

Great.

Fabulous.

Were his hands shaking?

Was he blushing faintly?

Hell no. That’s all in my head.

It'd be in my best interests if I stopped staring at him. I reduced the heat, afraid that the sauce would burn a second time and make it obvious that I was distracted. Carmen took an onion from the plastic container and began chopping. His typically quick hands were moving at a glacial pace.

“How are you?”

He asked.

“I’m pretty good, and yourself?”

Carmen shrugged nonchalantly.

“I’m alright. Kinda expected today to be busier, y’know?”

I scraped the pan to ensure the sauce ingredients were thoroughly combined.

“I get it. I mean, it’s a Saturday. Where the fuck is everyone?”

Carmen laughed, but it sounded forced. He didn't seem particularly pleased, nor did he smile. I bit my tongue.

“We may try out to-go’s tomorrow. Y’know, just see if it works. Personally, I think we should get a handle on everything before we try out a completely new fuckin’ system, but Sydney is pushin’ me.”

He was rambling. Carmen was never this talkative.

“I think to-go’s might be a good idea.”

Carmen pursed his lips into a straight line.

“There’s potential for it to be successful. The downside is that it also has the potential to blow up right in our fuckin’ faces.”

I tucked a stray hair behind my ear and glanced at Carmen through my fingers. He kept chopping slowly, his biceps flexing as he pushed the blade through the vegetable. The knife was dull. Carmen could feel my gaze. He cast a glance at me. As our gazes locked, a surge of heat pulsed through me. I quickly dismissed it, returning my attention to the sauce. Which, if I may say so, was progressing quite nicely.

“So, what were you and Richie talking about?”

I gulped audibly. Oh God, here we go. It’s time to address the giant elephant in the room.

“I told you. We were talking about baseball.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

His jaw muscles pulsed as he clenched his teeth.

“Forgive me if I don’t believe you.”

He murmured. I wouldn't have heard his words had I not been paying attention. I scoffed loudly.

“Why don’t you believe me?”

“Cause…”

Carmen’s voice trailed off, his Adam's apple bobbed as he gulped.

“Cause…”

He wasn’t cutting anymore. His grip on the knife became white knuckled. My playful smile dropped.

“Cause I heard you talking. The walls here are thin.”

Shit.

What should I do?

Apologize?

“I’m sorry Carmen.”

Carmen gritted his teeth, muscles bulging from his cheeks.

“Shit-I don't even know why I said it. I was just being stupid. I was just-,” I was rambling, “I was just making a joke-”

“You don’t need to apologize.”

I zipped my lips.

“Were you being serious?”

What?

He was mumbling.

I didn’t hear him correctly.

“Sorry, what?”

Carmen had a crimson face. He was unable to look at me. His empty eyes were fixed on the half-chopped onion resting on the cutting board.

“I-I asked if you were serious.

Was he seriously asking if I would be willing to sit on his face? I shrugged nonchalantly.

“I mean… kinda.”

Carmen’s bottom lip subtly quivered.

“Kinda?”

Oh my God.

He really was asking me if I’d be willing to sit on his face?

“Well, I mean. If you must know than yes. I was being serious.”

The air around us became tense as the silence lingered.

“Why?”

I asked, deducing that he most likely wasn’t asking me because he was simply curious.

“Cause, y’know, you could, if you wanted to.”

He turned to face me, a lustful undertone hidden behind his pupils.

“I mean- I’m not great at that kind of shit but- like- I wouldn’t mind giving it a try… Y’know, if you’d be up to it.”

It was my turn to blush. I mean, I’d definitely be up to it. I wasn’t lying when I said I wanted to sit on his face.

“Uh. Sure.”

My breath shuddered, and my words faltered as a result.

“Like, when?”

Carmen shrugged while flinging fictitious dust specks from the counter.

“I don’t know. Like, right now is good with me.”

Right now!

He wasn’t being serious.

“We can go to my office.”

Oh my God he was being serious. I gaped at him, wide eyed.

“Sure.”

I said hesitantly, still unsure that this was really happening. I was expecting him to laugh and say this was all a big joke.

Carmen nodded.

“Perfect. Um… I’ll be waiting.”

As he pushed past me and made his way to his office, his shoulder touched me. The feeling lingered. I stood still, in shock, gazing aimlessly at the plain wall.

What.

The.

Fuck.

-

I gently pushed the door open, peering into the dimly lit office. Carmen sat, the heel of his hand resting on his brow. I allowed myself to stare. He hadn't noticed my presence yet. My gaze was drawn to the veins protruding from his well-defined biceps. My eyes followed the threads downwards, halting when they landed on one of his numerous tattoos.

My breath hitched, a sudden wave of heat traveling to my core. I could feel wetness pooling between my thighs.

His palm was pressed against the crotch of his pants.

Shit.

He was cupping himself through his jeans.

“Hello.”

I said softly, opening the door slowly so as not to startle him. Carmen quickly redirected his attention towards me, resting both hands on the armrests.

“Hello.”

I closed the door gently behind me, trapping us. We were now cut off from the rest of the world, and the possibilities were limitless.

“Carmen if we stall any longer I’m gonna start having second thoughts.”

Carmen’s eyebrows shot upwards.

“Alright, alright. Let’s get this show on the road then.”

He stood, tugging subtly on his clothing in a futile attempt to hide his growing erection. Carmen lay flat on the floor, his gaze fixed on the ceiling.

I couldn't help but laugh. I'll be honest: he looked a little ridiculous.

“What?”

I waved my hand through the air.

“Oh, nothing.”

Oh shit. I suppose it was my turn to get naked. I kicked off my shoes and shakily undid my jeans, pulling them down until they encircled my ankles.

“Just- if you want me to do something different then-then just tell me because I don’t think I’ll be able to talk because…”

His voice trailed off. I chuckled.

“Because I’ll be sitting on your face?”

I dragged my soaked panties down my legs, adding them to the messy pile of clothing.

“Y-Yeah, exactly.”

Carmen chuckled, but it was an extremely uneasy sound. He was clearly nervous. I couldn't fault him. My nerves were also quite prevalent.

The cool air brushed against my now bare legs, raising goosebumps along my skin. I sauntered over to Carmen, his wide eyes following my every move.

“Shit.”

He mumbled under his breath.

I straddled his waist, running my open palms along his torso, hoping to somewhat reassure him. The strong muscles in his stomach rippled. I bit back a moan as the dull pulsing of his abdomen had slightly stimulated my aching cunt.

“Just- whenever you're ready.”

I nodded, shuffling upwards until I was straddling his neck. Carmen stared at me. His blue eyes were soft and his plush lips were slightly parted. His cheeks encompassed a hint of blush.

“I’ve been ready for a while now.”

I said, staring down at him with a faint smile prevalent on my lips. Carmen swallowed.

“Me too.”

I ran my fingers through his greasy hair. Carmen groaned through a closed mouth as I raked my nails along his scalp.

I positioned myself above his face, admiring his lust blown pupils before sinking down atop his nose.

“Fuck.”

I murmured, my eyes instantly fluttering closed as the tip of his large nose brushed against my swollen clit. Carmen began to hesitantly lap at my velvety wetness, his calloused hands wrapping around my plush thighs to hold me in place.

“Jesus Carmy.”

It was one thing to fantasize about it. When I was in the situation and could indulge in every minute touch, it was a completely different experience.

Carmen began to gradually grow more confident. His tongue began to eagerly penetrate my wet folds. And he bobbed his head in such a way that his nose stimulated my swollen bundle of nerves.

I furrowed my brow in pleasure. The coil within my lower abdomen was tightening. At this point, any sense of unease had vanished.

His nose gave a particularly pleasant nudge to my clit. I convulsed, arching my back as my entire body tensed. My fingers tightened around the roots of his hair. Carmen moaned, the vibrations resonating within my stomach.

My head lulled forward. Carmen’s lively eyes met mine.

“My God Carmen. Your mouth is fucking immaculate.”

My voice was shaky. I couldn't muster a confident tone. He began to quicken his movements, his eagerness growing as a result of the praise.

Shit, he liked that.

“You’re so good Carmen, you make me feel so fucking good.”

I reached behind me. Carmen moaned loudly against my cunt as I tenderly cupped his rock hard erection through his jeans. Surprisingly, his movements didn’t falter. I maintained intense eye contact, preserving the link between our psyches.

“Does this turn you on baby? Does it turn you on when I sit on your pretty face?”

Carmen whimpered. I scoffed breathily, gently massaging his erection.

“Soon I’ll return the favor. I bet your cock would feel really good in my mouth.”

Carmen instintivley jerked his hips against my palm. My abdomen was now pulled tight. The pornographic sucking of his mouth agaisnt my clit was making my brain foggy.

“Fuck Carmy I’m gonna cum.”

I threw my head back, continuing to palm his clothed erection as Carmen erotically ate me out. Every precise movement of his tongue delving between my folds along with the manner in which his nose subtly grazed against my clit was sending me spiraling.

“I bet you’ll look really pretty with my cum all over your face.”

Carmen readjusted his face, his warm lips now wrapped around my clit. He gave a particularly hard suck, and with that, I released. I moaned loudly, praying to the universe that no one was lingering around after hours.

Not that I really cared. I was far too engrossed in the erotic sensation of my boss’s mouth to be thinking of anything beside my freight train of an orgasm that was sweeping throguh my body.

Carmen continued to gently eat me out as I came down. I removed my hand from his cock, refocusing my attention on him. He was lapping at my juices desperately, wanting to prolong this feeling for as long as possible.

When I assumed he was satisfied, I shifted my hips downwards until I was straddling his waist. My cheeks flushed hot as I took in the sight of my wetness completely coating his chin.

“Jesus Carmen. You look hot.”

He licked his lips, a faint smile playing on the corners of his mouth. I leaned forward, giving him a quick kiss. My taste coated my tongue almost instantly.

“Do you want me to put your cock in my mouth?”

I whispered seductively.

“Uh…”

I pulled back.

“I don’t have to if you don’t want me to.”

I said this with as much sympathy as I could muster.

“No-No, it’s not that I don’t want you to, it's just…”

I cocked an eyebrow.

“I don’t think that’s necessary.”

Necessary?

I reached back. Perhaps a subtle touch will entice him to accept my offer.

I furrowed my brow in confusion.

He was soft.

Oh.

I couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Did you cum in your pants?”

Carmen blushed.

“Y-yeah.”

His bottom lip trembled.

“Sorry.”

I smiled, placing my hands on either side of his head to gain the necessary leverage to press my lips against his.

“It’s alright.”

I mumbled reassuringly.

“I think that’s really fucking hot”

[pixthefuckup]

im part of a school full of nerds that heavily respect the super intelligent ones and you have to make fun of anything that could be considered stupidity to be popular and also part of a culture where they revere nerds in general

i just so happened to come up with a swap au for npmd that accidentally criticizes ableism in the school system, the low funding, and the shitty idea of every kid versus another for smartness because "at least we're not (blank group that's on a "lower" level)", maybe even a tiny bit of purity culture criticism.

The nerds rule the school and anyone failing or need help for things is shit. Ruth, Richie, P.J, and Reese are the idols. Pete is the Steph in this equation. He wants to skip gym and Stephanie Lauter, professional failure and skipper, is going to help him out.

Meanwhile, Brenda, Jason, Kyle, and Stacy are the losers. Sure, they do football and cheerleading and stuff but does that really matter? It'll get you a scholarship... if you're lucky to be noticed in this shit hole. Besides, their grades are so shit that they can't even get out of this town like the elite. Steph is the Pete in this. She's okay with gym class but she'll help him because she's nice. I have a feeling that her "Micro-peter" would be something like Nepohanie after she accidentally dropped her report card in middle school in a busy hallway and a rumor started that her dad bribed the high school to let her in so she wasn't held back despite her terrible grades (terrible nickname i know)

Max is Grace. Grace is Max. Max would totally rat out people for not trying hard enough in gym and shit, the fucking loser. Man, that dirty dude! Grace, meanwhile, is beloved. She does volunteer work with babysitting and such, she's a loving Christian, she gets good grades, she's the poster girl for perfection. The teachers love her. That's why they let her taunt people and accidentally put people through her horrible passive aggressive tutoring that has you feeling awful.

idk how waylon house would work other than maybe pete pretending to host a secret studying session and i haven't narrowed down a way to get max to get as psychotic as grace did in the end with the black book but like... i think i've got a small vision here

[the-halls-of-hatchetfield-high]

Would you be willing to date someone of your same gender?

Ruth: Yeah, absolutely! Girls are soooo pretty...

Richie: *blushes* y-yeah, i...i would...if they're nice...

Pete: Yeah! I suppose I would if I had feelings for them. *smiles to himself, adjusts his glasses*

Max: *clears his throat* Yes. I- *sighs* Yeah, I would.

Steph: Sure I would, as long as they're cool, I'm way more about the person than the gender

Grace: ......................................look...

Steph: oh please, Grace, you check girls out alllll the time as hall monitor, you can't pretend-

Grace: FINE THEY'RE HOT OKAY? ...why did God have to make women so beautiful? so tempting???

// i assume this was directed at the characters? :P //

[getmeoutofhell]

Mickey Altieri x f reader

summary: mickey has a gift for you.

warnings: just mickey being mickey.

a/n: this takes place with the whole gf group. but this is for my BFF helloooo frennn. also happy eve y’all!!

“Merry christmas everyone!!” you said as you walked into the living room.

you were so excited today, the reason being is because you had mickey for secret santa.

“merry christmas y/n.” ethan said to you, handing you a small bag which you assumed was a gift from him.

“you dumb brain we aren’t supposed to do the secret santa until after we eat!” roman told him, slightly annoyed.

“ohhh right, my bad. sorry y/n pretend this never happened.” ethan then walked away to the christmas tree to put his gift back on the floor.

“okay ethan.” you said in between laughter.

you had your gift in your hand. no surprise you actually pulled mickeys name for the secret santa. you thought he some how did it on purpose, but you didn’t question it.

you and mickey had pretty strong feelings for each other for a while. you wouldn’t say he loved you, but you knew you loved him.

you saw stu put his gift on the floor under the tree, hiding it behind a bigger present.

“i know i was supposed to just get one gift. but the person i got deserves more than one.”

you knew immediately he picked billy or ambers name.

“you must have gotten billy or ambers name since you saying they deserve more than one.”

stu then put his index finger to his lips, making a shh sound and waking away. you playfully rolled your eyes at him.

“oh my god what’s that smell?” it was jill. she came and sat next to you in the couch.

“it’s mickey, charlie, and richie burning up the fucking turkey.” roman told her.

“that does stink damn.” you said, laughing at the end.

“no surprise it’s those three.” jill added.

*time skip 1 hour*

“okay guys, it’s time to come eat at the table. hurry up!” roman yelled to everybody.

you went and sat at the seat close to the end of the table. to your surprise mickey came and sat next to you.

“hey beautiful.” he smiled at you.

“oh! hey mickey, merry christmas.” you felt your body get a little warm from embarrassment, so you tried to avoid eye contact with him. no matter how many times you guys talked, his voice still make you a nervous wreck.

“merry christmas y/n.” you notice he had a christmas hat on, with an ugly sweater.

“nice sweater.” you tried to avoid the awkwardness with a joking compliment.

“thanks.” he chuckled.

about 5 seconds later everyone else started walking in the room, finding a seat to sit in.

ethan sat on your right, as mickey was on your left.

a little bit later, charlie and roman brought out the turkey and ham and sat them on the table. then went back into the kitchen and grabbed to rest of the food.

“thank god the food is done, i’m literally starving.” amber said. “that turkey looks and smells burnt.” jill stated, looking at it with disgust.

“let’s be nice jill, i bet they tried their best, right mickey?” you turned to mickey, waiting for an answer. “uhhh, yes?” you laughed.

“i guess not then, continue the slander jill.” jill laughed at your comment.

“okay guys let’s now eat.” roman told everyone.

as your enjoying your food, you look over at mickey, who was already looking at you. “is something wrong?” you asked concerned.

“do you know how pretty you are? like seriously.” he smiles. you feel your whole face get hot and you look away and avoid eye contact once again. “uhhh, i don’t know what to say to that. thanks i guess?” he then puts his hand on yours, rubbing it softly.

stu notices, and makes a shocked face. “ohhhh, the two love bugs are back at it.” he laughed and then stuffed his face with more food.

you felt your body heat up again, staring at your plate nervously. you turned to look at mickey, who’s face was a tiny bit red. “don’t do the most stu.” he said.

now it’s after dinner, and time to open the secret santa gifts. you were kinda excited to see what ethan had got you. but you were more excited to show mickey the gift you got him.

“alright let’s pass the gifts around. ethan…how about you go first. since you already spoiled who you got a gift for.” roman stated.

ethan mumbled a “my bad” and went and grabbed the gift with your name on it, and then looked for the one with his name.

“ohh, i wonder who got me this gift. y/n was it you?” he handed you your gift, and then sat down and opened his.

“maybe. maybe not.” you teased him, knowing you didn’t get his name. “okay so, this is ambers.” roman started handing the gifts to who they belong to. he eventually handed mickey his gift, then going to sit down.

you watch as everyone opens their gifts, all enjoying and making jokes with each other. “aren’t you gonna open your gift y/n?” mickey asked you, looking at you then the gift. “yeah! wait, you got me a gift?” you tried to remove the awkwardness by laughing. “special gift for a special girl.” he chuckles. you look inside the bag to find a box. you then look at him for a second before grabbing the box and reading it.

it was titled ‘my love’.

you then opened the box to see what was inside, only to find pictures of you during your everyday life. “do you like it princess?” he asked you. you took a minute to process what you were looking at, picking up and looking through the pictures. there was pictures of you in your pjs, and even pictures of you in the living room by yourself. “how?” you thought. “what…why? i appreciate the gift, it’s just…” you stared at the pictures. he put his hand on your knee. “now do you believe i love you?” you only started at him in disbelief, but felt your face and body heat up. maybe he does love you?

AHH I HOPE YOU LOVE THISSSS

[ciaomarie]

Neighbor Series: Ch. 4 Part 2

A Delicate Ecosystem

Part 2: Carmen is obviously down bad, but does Sydney feel as deeply? Is her career or love most important?

I think this might be the last in this series.

The rest of the day and night went smoothly. Sydney tried to dismiss that stupid conversation with Richie from her mind. Carmy was the same as ever. She supposed he didn't have "the talk" with him. Typical that Rich thought it was her responsibility to control the actions of a grown man.

The next day Sydney walked past Marcus and Fak huddled in conversation and thought she heard her name. She shrugged it off, put away her stuff in her locker and joined them.

"Hey, sorry to interrupt. Marcus can we talk for minute?"

Fak who usually had something quirky to say, just waved at her and scuddled away.

"Yeah, anything wrong?" Marcus asked with an odd, no an irritated look, on his face.

"Well, yes. Our bread supplier isn't going to come through for the rest of the week. A death in the family. Carmy wanted me let you know that we'll have to make it in-house today, but we have a backup ready for tommorrow."

"Got it."

"Okay, let me know if you need anything."

"I said I got it."

Sydney was thrown off by his tone. Yes, Marcus had asked her out several months ago and it was weird for that night. Afterwards, they'd moved on and were back on good terms. She racked her brain trying to think if she'd done or said something recently to offend him.

"Um, is there a problem?"

"Nope."

Marcus's face was now unreadable and he walked away to his station. It was eerie, but Sydney had many other things to do so she shelved it for now.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The following day Carmy stood behind the restaurant for a his "smoke" break right before nightly service. He quit cigarettes a shortly after The Bear opened because he had caught pneumonia and missed two days of work. His doctor told him that she'd seen a lot of pneumonia cases in her elderly and smoking patients that season. So now he chewed Nicorette and pretended that it was just as satisfying. While he stood there enjoying the solitude, Anna, a new hostess came out and began smoking her vape pen. She had a one of those warm, generic voices that was perfect for customer service, but she could instantly switch to a cloying Kardashian-esque accent. She used it whenever she could talk to Carmy alone. However, today she didn't immediately begin speaking when she saw him. He decided to not waste the chance to escape. Just as he was about to go back in Anna spoke up.

"So…do you like know of any nice apartments around here?"

Carmy was facing the door so he could roll his eyes, without her seeing. Then he turned around trying to look neutral.

"Uh, no. Well, I like mine. It's 10 minutes from here, but there's almost never anything available."

"Oh, really? Didn't Sydney just get a place there? Or did she move in with you?"

"Excuse me?"

"Oh, I just thought I heard like you were maybe together?"

Anna kept her voice light, but she seemed nervous. One hand was gripping her vape pen and the other was twirling her long brown hair.

"No, we don't live together. What does that have to do with you finding an apartment?"

"No? Well, I didn't think so. Sydney is great and all, but she's…like you could like date anyone here, you know?" Anna replied choosing to ignore his question.

Carmen couldn't believe he was having this conversation. This time he couldn't help rolling his eyes in her face. The unmitigated gall of this women to talk about Sydney and to approach her employer in this manner.

"Anna, my dating life is not up for discussion."

Carmen wanted to say more, but he knew that it would be best to discuss it with Natalie first. She came from corporate America and knew the proper HR way of dealing this stuff.

"Oh, oh yeah. Like, okay. Um, I better get back" Anna stammered, blushing and darted through the door.

That night Carmy was on alert. It was one minor incident, but he had to suppress his compulsion to spiral with doubt and worry that Sydney would be hurt because of him. He hadn't really thought much about how others might view their potential relationship. He probably blocked it out because there was already so much to worry about. Also, their kitchen "mind-meld" flow was getting better all the time. It was exhilarating how they had become more and more attuned with one another during service. Often while working side by side they would hand each other the very thing they needed without even having to speak, much less look at each other. They could plate a dish together faster than a pit crew could replace a tire. With a glance Carmy knew when Sydney needed a break on their most insane evenings. He'd just squeeze her shoulder and she'd move so he could take over for a quick five. He did the same for others though.

However, what happened the other night might have raised some eyebrows. He was asked to greet a congressperson who was dining there and he beckoned for Sydney to join him. Before they went out he grabbed a towel to pat her dewy forehead, retied her chef's coat and smoothed it down like he was her personal valet. This was in front of the entire kitchen. He hadn't meant to do anything that would make Sydney a target. His intention was to support her, not romance her at work. Of' course there were slip ups. He just hoped the conversation with Anna was a one-off. To be on the safe side during service he tried not to do anything extra with her besides their usual telepathic routine. Sydney followed his lead avoiding making unnecessary remarks or touching him.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later he walked her home. They were silent at first, their stride in perfect harmony.

Carmy cleared his throat.

"Sydney, has anyone been treating you differently?"

Sydney paused in surprise for a second, but then she answered "Am I that easy to read?"

Carmen was now very concerned.

"No, it's just that I had a weird conversation before service with one of the front staff."

"Was it about us?"

"Yeah, has anyone said anything to you?"

"Yes, Richie did. A couple others are just being a little icy this week. It's no big deal."

Carmen took her hand in his, intertwining their fingers.

"What did Richie say?"

"Oh, Mr. Richard had a speech. He wanted to make sure I kept the "shop" closed until you and Nat could pay back Cicero. He's afraid I'll mess up the ecosystem. "

Carmy's froze for a second, then he blushed scarlet from the mention of him getting anywhere near Sydney's "shop" and from Richie's audacity to address Syd instead of him.

She continued.

"At the time I thought he was just being Richie. Now, I don't know. I don't want to mess anything up for you, for us. The Bear is so new and we are on track to paying off the debt and maybe even getting a star."

"Sydney. We make an excellent team and nothing that we've done or will do together outside of The Bear will change it. I promise you, that I won't let it change. Your dreams are first priority."

"So are yours, Carmy."

Carmy's focused on his breathe for a moment, his heart pounding in his ears. His dream was doing this with HER. He meant it when he said he wouldn't even want to do it without her. Each day together wove a new thread from his heart to hers, but he wouldn't force it on her.

"Sydney, I like you. More than anyone I've ever…."

He stopped unsure if she was ready to hear how deep his feelings ran.

"But I understand if you want me to back off. Whatever you decide I will talk to them and fix this. You deserve nothing but respect."

They reached the front of their building and Sydney turned to face him. He was visibly trembling. Tenderness for him surged from her heart. Carmen was the most sincere man she'd ever met. He couldn't fake happiness, indifference, or confidence unless that was how he truly felt. Past the anxiety, occasional moodiness, and temper, at his core she saw someone who desperately desired to serve and to be understood.

He stood there defenseless.

She put a hand over his heart as if to speak to it.

"No, don't back off. I don't care what any of them think as long as we're good."

Carmy breathed again, took her hand in his and kissed her palm, nuzzling it against his cheek.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sydney lay in bed that night thinking. She knew down to her bones that her foundation was stronger than his. It was not due to any fault of his own. Her home had been filled with safety and love. It was her nature to be a perfectionist, but even when she failed she knew that she had intrinsic value as a person. What she lacked that Carmen had was the courage to be vulnerable. He was open to her about Mikey within the first few weeks of their meeting despite not knowing how she would respond. This and his consistent effort to know her, drew her in despite the chaos of early days at The Beef. She knew that he would actually listen and give her an opportunity to grow. There was another intangible factor, which scared and thrilled Sydney. When she often found him gazing at her, there was a feeling that he was not only moved by her beauty, but for who she was. It reminded of her of how her father looked at her mom, even when she was sick. It was one of her few memories that hadn't faded. She also knew there were no strings attached when he promoted her to CDC, but her heart demanded more with each passing day. She wanted to be Carmen's refuge and release in every way. This knowing was overwhelming and she was grateful that he moved slowly despite the hunger in his eyes.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day Natalie was working on-site when Carmen came into her office and closed the door.

"Hey Carm, how are you?"

"I'm good. Sorry, I didn't respond to your text last night. Baby PJ looked very cute in his White Sox outfit"

"Well, at least send a smiley face or something! But what's up?"

"So, I don't know if you've noticed but I'm interested in someone who works here."

"Oh, bro I know…so are you and Sydney official?"

Carmy brushed his hair back with his fingers and shook his head.

"Were you never going to say anything?" he asked.

"The best thing a sister can do is stay out of it. It's brothers who get involved with their sister's romantic choices. Thank God, you couldn't run off Pete."

"Okay. No, we're not rushing into anything. So far, she allows me to walk her to and from work. And we talk everyday."

Natalie clutched her chest and sank down further into her chair.

"She allows you to…I CAN'T! I had no idea my baby brother was this sweet!"

"SUGAR, the point of me bringing this up is that some of the staff have been going behind my back to talk to her, icing her out, and there's been a rumor that we live together. I won't have it! Anyways, I figure you know the corporate way to handle it."

"Okay, we were going to discuss health insurance options for the next enrollment period during family service, but I can slide in a talk about relational professionalism."

"Thank you."

Natalie sighed and squeezed Carmy's hand.

"She allows you to walk with her! Oh, Pete is going to melt."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

For old time's sake Sydney prepared Mikey's spaghetti recipe for family service. Carmy saved her a seat and she sat down next to him feeling Anna's bitter glances and Richie's disapproval. Marcus ignored them. As they ate Natalie gave the insurance presentation and then her politically correct professionalism talk. She took care to make it not obviously about Sydney and Carm. When she was done and people started to file out, Carmen asked for the original Beef staff to remain behind. They took their seats again looking intrigued.

He moved to stand at the head of the table.

"Alright, great…Okay. So I asked Natalie to give that talk. And thank you Nat, but I have something I need to say. too"

"So, You've all been here a long time. Before I came you already had each other's backs and then I took over. It was an adjustment. Then Sydney came and I had a partner from my world. There more changes but somehow we found a way to work together. Then we found the money and we started this. You all choosing to stay and gain new skills, means so much me and I know it does to you too.

The Bear is a special place because it's a family business. And not just because of Natalie and I, but it's all of you too. The thing is we got to have each other's backs. It's not enough to to get through service, get the reviews, a star, whatever, but we got to respect each other. You know that without Sydney and Natalie giving it everything they had during the reno, none of this would have happened. Where we're sitting would be a parking lot or a Dunkin's. Anyways, I'm disappointed that some in here saw everything Sydney did to help get us here and they're giving her crap because I like her. In HERE I respect all of you, everyone is paid fairly, given opportunities, and I care about you…your lives. She didn't do anything, but her job and she deserves your respect. Out THERE I hope to spend as much time with her as she'll let me. But in HERE we're a business and we're a family.

The silence was palpable. Sydney's eyes never left Carmy's face while he spoke and when he took the courage to meet them, he saw admiration there and her beautiful smile.

Tina broke the heavy mood.

"So, Jeff. Are y'all together? Are we what they a call a "mom and pop" now?"

Carmy grinned, still looking at Sydney.

"I'm working on it."

[maggie-004]

(Un-) Lucky coincidence - 2

Jenna Ortega x Fem reader

Summary: Y/N, a nursing student, comes to the aid of Jenna Ortega, a famous actress, after she falls and gets injured outside a shopping center. Despite the initial awkwardness, Y/N's nursing skills impress Jenna.

Words: 782

Everything in cursive letters is German so … pretend I guess.

I tried to keep my cool. Of course I know who she is, I basically grew up with her, I watched her since Richie Rich, Stuck in the middle and literally everything else. “Oh you are Jenna Ortega, that’s so cool,  I always wanted to be an actress, but I’m way to shy” I said and hoped to not scare her away. “Really? You don’t seem like a shy person at all, I mean you just came to help me, even though I am a total stranger to you” Jenna looked at me questioning. “You know, I really have to help, its my duty and I am required to” I explained. “Required as in required by Law… or how exactly do you mean” now I really confused her. “Yes I am required by law, as a person with medical knowledge, it’s illegal to not help. I could get into serious trouble”  I explained when Lauren finally came back with everything we needed.  “Hey here’s everything you need, but I’m leaving now, Tom is waiting for me, I called him to pick me up. So bye” and then she really just left, without asking if I need help or, well I don’t know what the hell that was even Jenna seemed to notice as she asked me “Uhm why did your little friend just took of like that?” Ironic because Jenna is way smaller than Lauren but she has a good point. “Well I’ll be honest I don’t really understand, but ever since she has Tom, her Boyfriend, she ghosts me and we currently are drifting apart, but that’s really not important right now, let’s get you fixed up” I really started to get emotional, so I changed the subject and I really need to get a look at that wound. I really could’ve used her help, I wanted to use the non – touch technique but that’s not to easy if you are alone in an definitely dirty environment. I have no other choice, I just need to get her cleaned up. “Let’s get this over with, don’t flinch but this is cold, it shouldn’t burn though let me know.”

“Okay…no it’s just really cold but no burning.” Jenna did in fact flinch, but that’s okay “Yeah it looks good, it won’t need stitches, how are you feeling anyway? Are you dizzy, do you have a headache or are you feeling tiered?” I asked her because she does have a bump and I just want to make sure she doesn’t has a concussion. “No, really I’m perfectly fine, thank god it doesn’t need stitches.” Thank god I thought to myself. I did check way to late for a concussion. “ okay now just the band aid… aaand done. Perfect, but do you wanna get checked out in the hospital?” I asked her. “No not really but thank you so much for helping me. It’s impressing how calm you are, I could never. Hey can I buy you an coffee as a thank you?” she suggested. “Well I’d love that, but I’m not quite sure if you should go in there, it looks like there are all the people inside, your acting, better said your projects reach sooo yeah” I said a little bit sad, because I thought she’d ghost me now, but hell no I was so wrong.

“Oh yeah you’re right there are a lot of people even out here staring at us. Well I’d invite you to my hotel room but I kind of don’t have one, so I’ll have to sleep on a bench tonight. They cancelled my room last minute. Everything else is full, I literally don’t have a place to stay” Jenna explained to me, woah I didn’t think anyone would be stupid enough to cancel a room for a celebrity, but boy was I wrong. “Hey Jenna, if and really only if you want to you can come to my place for a coffee and we could look together for a place for you to stay. But really only if you feel safe” I offered to her. “Yeah that would be literally so nice of you, plus I’d love to see how people here actually live.” she simply said.

A/N still, English is not my first language. Still hope you like it :)

[im-not-a-l0ser]

Max: Okay, you guys, there’s Rich. Watch. Just watch this Richie: *walking past* Max: See? Still pretending he’s not interested. Oh! He’s coming over. Just pretend like we don’t know him. We’ve forgotten who he is! Richie: Hey guys! Steph: Hey Richie! Jason: Hello! Max: … Steph: Hey, Richie. You know Max, our friend? He’s nice. He’s not bad to look at, right? Max: Thanks, Steph Richie: Well, of course Steph: Do you want to go out on a date with him? You got my blessing! Max: Steph! Richie: Sure. Is Sunday okay? Steph: Sunday’s perfect. He can’t wait Richie: On the date, I will be able to talk to him directly, right? Steph: Yeah Richie: All right, see you Sunday, Max *leaves* Max: Okay. What the hell was that? You know what? Don’t answer me Max, giggling: I have a date with Richie!

[t4tozier]

MY turn to be werewolf horny. monster fucker eddie being into outdoor sex with his werewolf boyfriend <3 pretends to hate getting dirt all over him but moans louder when richie shoves his face into the dirt. panics abt being seen by some hiker but his dick gets even harder when richie mentions they could get caught. has a silly little to-go bag packed with essentials so hes ready to go out to the wilderness whenever. etc.

YEAHHHH. ough eddie learning to not only be okay with but actually enjoy being dirty is something that can be so personal. he complains that richie takes him so far out into the woods and that he's gonna get stains on his nice pants and then he ends up getting grass and dirt and cum all over them anyway <3 he looks like he's gotten dragged through a fucking tree when richie's done with him

they're always off the path enough where nobody would actually see them, but close enough that eddie gets excited about the potential of being seen. if anyone actually caught them he'd probably explode out of shame--and fear that they'd think he was, like, into bestiality or some shit--but in his head, the idea that everyone will see him splayed out in the dirt being groped and pounded by his massive werewolf boyfriend is almost enough to make him come on its own

them having little go bags everywhere is sooo cute and funny. lube, water bottles, stain remover, condoms (though they're rarely used), wet wipes, etc etc. eddie's got one in his car, in richie's, at work, literally anywhere he may be whisked away to go fuck in a park or the closest forest. obsessed with them.

[doublestandardlove]

Grace Chasity with 2, 3, 6, 11, 15, 20, 22, 23, 25, and 26- what’s your favorite fic you’ve written involving her?

okay just gonna pretend like i don't know who this is, but thank you<3

2. favorite thing from canon?

the fact that canonically, grace chasity wears her clothes for the next day to bed, and i love that they brought that into npmd

3. least favorite thing from canon?

uhh her attraction to max- wHAt who said that !! 👀 tbh not gonna explain this one

6. what's something you have in common?

i'm... i'm sure you can guess 😭

11. would i date this character?

well...the question isn't really would i date her, more of would she date me;-; but yes i would date her if she was nice to me at church

15. what's your favorite ship for this character?

christianhotline 10/10 stephgrace, holyphone, cyberangels, however you want to call it, they've been my favorite since day one y'all

20. which character is their ideal best friend?

this took me a minute, bc grace is just lonely. her "best friend" is reluctant to be seen as her friend, but i'm not getting into that rn. but ideally, richie:3 i saw the vision in workin' boys, and i'm sticking to it

22. what's smth you do/don't like in fics w this character?

yk what let me come back to this, bc i'm gonna have to think about this more lol

23. favorite picture of this character?

love it, she's cutie🥰

25. what was your first impression of this character? how about now?

mannn i'm sorry to say that i clocked her as a fave the second i saw her in perky's buds TwT like idk loved the fit, loved her look, and now? same, except 1000x worse

26. favorite fic i've written involving this character?

ooh ok it's a wip i have indeed **written** that's basically just grace & ruth & richie being friendss leading up to the events of workin' boys and how grace and richie ended up going to watch ruth perform together 🥹

damn i need to finish that.

[mysteriouslover1516]

You Are Enough (Updated)

Updated Version of my old One Shot. I am much prouder of this one. I hope you all like it!

(Also, I couldn't bear to have Richy not in this story, so he is still alive and was never the MWAF. Please don't hate me, lol.)

MC stared at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, haunted by her thoughts. Why couldn’t she be beautiful like everyone else? Hannah and Lilly had gorgeous eyes that sparkled, Cleo and Jessy smiles that could light up a whole room, not to mention the excellent figures all 4 girls possessed. It didn’t matter how slim MC was herself, how her own eyes could capture men’s attention, how her smile was so contagious. She should try to be skinnier, pay more attention to her hair and makeup, perhaps then she could compare, maybe she would be-

“MC?”

MC became aware of the tall figure behind her, his wavy black hair slightly messy, those electric blue eyes staring back into hers. “Hey,” she mumbles.

“What are you doing in here?” The hacker asks, wrapping his arms around her small waist and pulling her to his chest, resting his chin in the crook of her neck.

“Nothing,” a small smile tugs at the corner of MC’s mouth as she views them both together in the mirror. “It’s nothing.”

“Are you sure about that?” Jake looks at her skeptically.

“Yes,” MC sighs. “I’m just thinking.”

“Hmmm, join me in my study?”

MC smiles at Jake’s version of an invitation, her fears and insecurities fleeing as Jake’s calming, laid-back presence consumes her.

- - -

“What do you think of this dress?” Jessy asks, hands in the air, head cocked, a small side smile forming on her lips. “Belt or no?” She reaches for a leather belt that lays on her dresser, giving the dark blue, strapless dress more of a waist as she wraps it around herself.

“I don’t think the belt suits the dress,” Hannah frowns, “It makes it look more rugged, less elegant.”

“Oh man,” Jessy sighs, brushing her long red hair over her shoulder.

Lilly snaps her fingers, “What about a ribbon, Jessy? It’ll still give you the waist you want, but it won’t look as out of place.”

“Like I have a bunch of ribbon on hand,” Jessy pretends to pout.

“Do you actually need a belt or ribbon though?” Cleo finally interjects. “The dress was designed to accentuate your curves already, so I don’t think a belt is necessary.”

“And we all know Dan will like it anyway,” Lilly smirks.

“Lilly!” Jessy covers her mouth, eyes wide.

“It’s true,” MC laughs. “Heck, you could wear a potato sack and Dan will still say you’re the prettiest girl he’s ever laid eyes on.”

“You all are full of it!” Jessy rolls her eyes, cheeks red with embarrassment.

“Well, whatever the case is, we best get busy.” Hannah reminds. “MC, you’re next.”

“I can’t wait for Jake to see your new dress!” Lilly beams, pulling it out of Jessy’s closet where the other three dresses were hanging. 

A nervous feeling wells up inside MC’s stomach as she looks at the dress, now unsure. “I don’t know, do you think he’ll like it?”

“Come on,” Jessy laughs, “don’t be dumb.”

“He’s already in love with you anyway, there’s nothing to be scared about.” Hannah encourages.

“Here, go put it on.” Lilly hands MC the hanger, nudging her towards the bathroom.

MC takes it, her hands slightly shaking as she walks into the other room, closing the door behind her. After she slides the dress on she once more meets her reflection, this time it being a full-sized mirror. The modest, off-the-shoulder, black dress fits her curves nicely, cutting just above the knee, slightly flaring outward towards the bottom. MC’s hands subconsciously find themselves at her waist, smoothing out the fabric, her eyes following her actions. A frown flitters across her face, the dress didn’t fit quite right. It looked like it was too tight….she needed to be skinner, it was simply unavoidable.

“MC, hurry up!” Lilly knocks obnoxiously on the door. “I have to put my dress on next!”

“Does it look okay?” She asks, hurriedly, walking out of the room.

“It’s gorgeous,” Jessy smiles. “Even better than it looked in the store.”

The other three girls quickly changed into their dresses, each defining their figures well and enhancing their appeal.

The five girls then took turns working on each other’s hair and makeup until they decided they had reached the desired results for each.

“Perfect,” Cleo states as the five girls crowd in for a selfie in the bathroom mirror. “Great job everyone.”

“Great job on being fricken models,” Hannah smirks

“HashtagBeautifulbesties,” Jessy giggles. “Remind me to use that on my instagram when I post this picture. Now hurry, we can’t be late!”

- - -

“Easy hackerboy,” Dan teases as he leans on a pool stick, waiting for Jake to make his move.

“Do you really have to call me that?” Jake sighs with a roll of his eyes, carefully concentrating on which ball to hit in order to get the most points.

“Fine, hackerman.”

The balls ricochet across the table, creating a loud clanking noise. Jake smirks triumphantly as three of the balls fall into holes. “How was that, Daniel?”

“Could be worse,” Dan shrugs. “Richy, you’re next.”

The blonde man carefully lines his pole up with the white ball, soon sending one into a hole. “I’m surprised we’re meeting here actually,” he states, nonchalantly.

Jake sighs, “Right. I hate this place.”

“More like you hate Phil,” Dan corrects.

“Same thing,” Jake says, clenching his pole frustratedly.

“Tommyboy? It's your turn.” Dan looks at the brunette. “And take that stupid beanie off.”

“Hannah likes it,” Thomas defends himself.

“Well look who showed up,” Dan booms as the five girls walk into the bar.

“Have you girls considered being Pageant Queens?”  Richy smiles shyly.

Thomas walks towards his girlfriend, “You look lovely as always, Hannah.”

“Do you like my dress?” Jessy prances over to Dan, who is grinning ear to ear.

“How much did it cost?”

“DAN!” Jessy smacks his shoulder, laughing.

“You girls look amazing,” Richy says, doing his iconic side smile.

“Jake?” MC smiles unsure as he just looks at her. “Do you like it? I tried to make sure it wasn’t too revealing, I know you don’t like how Phil-”

“Yes,” Jake says, simply.

MC blushes, “Really?”

“Of course,” Jake looks at her with a smile, offering no other words.

“Hello, MC.” Phil suddenly speaks behind her, winking when she turns around. “Don’t you look gorgeous tonight, as always.”

“Thanks, Phil.” MC says with a small smile, crossing her arms slightly.

“Jake,” the bartender smirks as he sees the hacker’s jaw set.

“Philip,” Jake nods his head as he reaches out and takes hold of MC’s arm, drawing her against his chest. “Don’t you have some other customers to tend to?”

“Jake,” MC mutters underneath her breath.

Phil cocks his head and looks once more at MC, “None as pretty as sweet little MC here, she’s a doll.”

“Phil, stop it.” Jessy sighs and shoots a glare towards her brother.

Phil only chuckles and winks again at MC, “Well, if you want a free drink, I have a seat reserved for you up front.”

MC nods and as soon as Phil turns his back on the group, she rolls her eyes. “You didn’t have to get so jealous, Jake.”

“He seems very unlikable,” Jake states.

“I agree,” Cleo nods her head, frowning as she watches the bartender laugh while engaging with a pretty blonde at the counter. “Playboy.”

“Womanizer,” Richy adds.

“How about a different topic?” Thomas asks, trying to lighten the mood. “Jake was destroying us at pool before you girls walked in.”

“Hey,” Dan protests. “I haven’t even had my turn yet.”

Richy rolls his eyes, “How about a game of cards?”

“You brought cards?” Dan asks.

“Yeah,” Richy grins sheepishly.

“Thanks, Richy,” Cleo smiles, “That was a great idea.” Richy grins,“what should we play?” “Poker,” Lilly answers.

“I’m in,” MC sits down at a table. “Jake?”

“No, no, no.” Dan protests. “Jake has to finish this game of pool with me, he already started it.”

“I guess that means I’m obligated to finish the game as well,” Richy makes a sad face.

“Obviously. Thomas?” Dan stares, expectantly.

Hannah smirks as Thomas begrudgingly walks back over to the pool table, she herself sitting down at the table amongst the other girls. “What’s the stakes?”

“What about we take the winner to The Black Swan and share the price of their meal, but on top of that everyone has to buy an appetizer?” Jessy raises an eyebrow..

“Oooh,” Lilly smiles. “I like that idea, how about you, MC?”

MC’s stomach suddenly twisted at the thought of eating so much food, how would she get rid of all that weight?

“MC?” Hannah asks, noting the hesitancy.

“Sure,” MC manages to say with a small smile. “Sounds like fun.”

“I think so too,” Cleo agrees.

“I hope I win,” Jessy laughs. “The Black Swan is my absolute favorite.”

Cleo laughs, “We’ll see.”

- - -

“Did you enjoy yourself tonight, MC?” Jake asks later as the couple are getting ready for bed.

“Yes,” MC smiles. “I won the Poker game.”

“Good job,” Jake praises. “And the reward?”

“A night at the Black Swan,” MC says as her smile fades.

“What’s wrong?” Jake asks, concerned. “I thought you liked their food.”

“I do.”

Jake frowns, “What is it, MC?”

“I was just thinking of how much you’ve changed. It’s nice to see how much you’ve grown inside the group with everyone.”

“If that makes you happy, then I will continue to make myself uncomfortable and socialize with them.” Jake says in a serious voice.

MC giggles softly, “Do you really have to put it that way, Jake?”

“That was not my intention,” Jake cracks a small smile. “What I mean is,  I still feel somewhat out of place amongst them. It’s been awhile since I’ve formed relationships, MC.”

MC gazes up at the young hacker, “I know.”

“No, you don’t know.” Jake shakes his head, “My past is still hidden from you.”

“Then share it with me now.”

“MC…”

“Please,” MC asks, curiosity evident in her eyes.

Jake sighs, “Hannah and Lilly’s father was away from home for two months as he was creating a business arrangement between two contracting companies . During those two months he met my mother and took an interest in her, most notably for her beauty and optimistic nature. She consented to the relationship because she was unaware he was married. When he confessed that he had cheated on his wife, my mother broke it off with him and told him to recommit himself to his family from then on. After finding out she was pregnant, she made the decision to raise me on her own. My mother always struggled financially, but when she had me her money problems grew worse. We had enough to get by, she made sure I had an education, was kept warm during the winter, had food to eat, clothes to wear. She worked tirelessly at her job as a waitress, secretly saving most of her tips for my future college fund. We were happy, just the two of us, she adored me. My mother was the best thing in my life, I didn’t need or want anyone else when she was with me. When I was fifteen her car was side-swiped on her way home, she was killed instantly. I never imagined her to be gone so suddenly, it left me shocked. After her death, I drowned myself in my studies, most importantly computer science. When the FBI found out about a young seventeen-year-old boy decrypting algorithms which caused years to crack, they enlisted me. During my year of working there, I uncovered the many scandals hidden inside the bureau, including embezzlement. I couldn’t stay quiet, the people deserved the truth. I anonymously and periodically leaked certain things to the public, but eventually the bureau was able to trace it back to me. At nineteen I was forced to go on the run.”

“That must have been awful,” MC frowns as she considers the hardships Jake was forced to endure at such a young age.

The young hacker takes her hand, clearing his throat as he continues. “I was without a home, without an identity, I had disappeared from the face of the earth. I had no friends, no family, it was just me and my gear. My mother had left me a letter along with her will when she had died, the will naturally gave me all of her savings, but the letter was much more important. Within the letter she finally disclosed my heritage, what had taken place in order to foreshadow my birth. Along with the letter was also a picture of my mother with the man I had never met, my father. I researched his name and was able to find pictures of him and his family, his occupation, where he resided, anything that the internet could pull up. Something inside my soul urged me to reach out to him, but that was too risky, I didn’t want to be responsible for tearing a family apart. That is how I came across my half-sister, Hannah. Lilly was also an option, but being that Hannah was only two years younger than me, she seemed like the best choice. I found her instagram account and messaged her, using the excuse of asking her what type of cat Dusty was. She replied and was eager to keep the communications open. Through our messages she figured out I was some sort of genius, but something went horribly wrong. Hannah started to fall in love with me, in love with someone she’d never met in person, in love with her half-brother. It was evident to see in her replies that I needed to pull myself away. My answers got shorter and shorter, and soon she stopped emailing me. Months later she posted a picture of her and a brown-haired guy she referenced as her boyfriend.”

“Thomas,” MC says.

“Yes.” Jake answers. “Then a year later she suddenly emailed me, asking for my help. As you know, I immediately video called her, she was unexpectedly ambushed while on the call.”

“And then she sent you my number.”

“Yes, and I immediately reached out to you as my only hope for finding Hannah.” Jake nods and then starts to smirk, “But then something with you also went horribly wrong.”

“And what was that, Jake?” MC teases, cheeks painted pink.

“You asked for my name, and I gave it to you. You also asked for the color of my hair. Then you prodded, asking if I was curious about who you even were.”

“And?”

“Of course I was curious, you showed up under such mysterious circumstances, you had no recollection of meeting Hannah. But still, her last message sent from her phone contained just your number, what was the connection?”

“Now we know it was a typo, she was trying to send Alan’s number to Thomas, but she hit the wrong key in her hurry.”

“Yes, which unintentionally but thankfully brought you into the whole mystery.”

“Thankfully?” MC giggles softly as Jake smirks some more.

“I met you, and then everything changed.” Jake says. “For the first time in a long while I craved relationship. You piqued my interest. I found myself slowly falling for you, for a complete stranger. When you confessed you liked me over text, my heart raced, but my common sense and cynical nature took over.”

“You told me it wasn’t right, that it was dangerous for both you and for me. It left me stunned.”

“I know MC, I am so sorry.” Jake reaches out and kisses MC’s forehead softly. “But that chat was forever in my mind for a long time after. As the stakes rose, the more danger you were placed in, the more evident my feelings for you became. After Lilly’s video forced me to flee again, it nearly tore my heart out as I had to inform you that you would be on your own for a while. I felt like I was ditching you, I didn’t know if I’d ever be able to contact you again.”

“I felt the same,” MC confesses.

“I promised you then that I would never let my pursuers catch me, because then it would separate me from you.”

“When I read that text, I felt hopeful despite all the circumstances.”

“I had set Nymos up to protect you and alert me of any suspicious activity concerning your phone while I was on the run. When I got the first alert of an attempt made by the FBI to hack your phone, it motivated me even more to find a safe place so I could help you. I found shelter in a small hotel.”

“Simple but sufficient,” MC remembers with a small smile.

“Yes,” Jake smiles back. “I had no sooner set my computer up when I got another alert that the FBI was trying to find your location, soon turning into accessing your camera.”

“I was so scared.”

“I was able to stop them just before they had access to your camera. The first thing I could think of to text you was-”

“Hello MC.”

“Yes, and I remember exactly what you replied. You said Do you know I feel like crying right now?”

“I was so weak,” MC shakes her head full of shame.

“No, you were human. You said, I’m in danger, Jake.” The hacker recalls, getting a far away look in his intoxicating blue eyes. “And I made another promise to you, do you remember?”

“You said, I will never let him get close to you ever again.”

“And I have kept that promise, haven’t I?”

“Yes.”

“And now I have to protect you from another enemy,” Jake looks at her seriously.

MC’s eyes flash with fear, “What do you mean?”

“I have to save you from yourself.” The hacker answers. “From starving yourself and forcing yourself to undereat.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” MC crosses her arms.

“Promise me we will tomorrow then.”

“We don’t have to talk about anything,” MC protests.

“MC.”

“Fine.” MC turns her back on the black-haired man, walking to her side of the bed and climbing in. She lays down, back still facing her lover, pulling the covers up over her head.

“I love you, MC.” Jake says softly, MC can feel the weight shift as he joins her in the bed. “That is why I must force you to talk about the hard things.” MC remains quiet, tears starting to stream down her face as she lays there. She can hear Jake sigh and then his arm slips around MC’s waist, pulling her to his chest once more. She uncovers her head and turns around in his arms, “Tomorrow we will talk, I promise, Jake.” “Thank you, MC.” Jake pecks her on the lips softly, “Goodnight, love.”

- - -

“MC?” Jake asks, gently waking her up the next morning. A small smile tugs at his lips as he watches her slowly open her eyes and then close them again, snuggling her face deeper into the covers.

“What?” MC sighs, voice dry.

“I made breakfast for you.”

“At what time? Six in the morning?” MC giggles tiredly, glancing at the alarm which says 6:58. “Jake, it’s Saturday. You’re supposed to sleep in.”  She rolls over, trying to block him out. “Or you at least let me sleep in.”

“But what about breakfast?”

“I don’t want breakfast, I want to sleep.” She mumbles into the pillow.

“You’re going to be hungry and angry soon.”

“It’s called being hangry, Jake. And I’m angry now, so please, shush.”

Jake looks at MC, frowning. Without warning he yanks the covers off the bed and picks her up easily.

“What the heck are you doing?! Are you insane?!” MC laughs, trying to somehow still act mad.

Jake smirks at her as she tries to get out of his arms, “You need to eat.”

“Not hungry.”

“Then we at least need to have our talk. MC, please.” Jake’s worried look makes her heart ache. “Why else do you think I’m making breakfast this morning?”

“But-”

“I know you suffer from a dysmorphic disorder, MC. You believe yourself to be overweight. BDD.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” MC lies.

“You know full well what it means, MC. BDD-Body Dysmorphic Disorder, you’re obsessed with your appearance, worried about your weight, how people see you. It’s rooted from anxiety, low self-esteem, comparing yourself to others, depression even.”

“How did you find out?”

“It’s not hard to notice, all of your friends can see it, MC. You’ve progressively been starving yourself, Jessy and the others have repeatedly told me how little you eat anymore when you’re with them. I notice that after we get done eating together, you disappear into the bathroom for twenty minutes at a time, purging I assume. When I wrap my arms around your waist I can feel your ribs, this is not healthy, MC!” Jake’s voice rises, “Why do you do this to yourself?!”

MC lip starts to tremble, “I can’t compare to the others, Jake.”

Jake leads MC to the bathroom and points at the scale on the floor. “I want to show you something.”

“Trust me.”

MC gets on the scale, anxiety skyrocketing as the number increases the more weight she places on it.

“What Does It Say?”

“105lbs,” MC shivers.

“Hannah and Jessy are slender, aren’t they? Cleo and Lilly have excellent figures?”

“Yes,” MC nods, tears streaming down her face.

“Jessy weighs 123lbs, Hannah 129lbs. Cleo comes at 131lbs, Lilly 137lbs.” Jake says in a soft voice. “You’re 18lbs smaller than Jessy, MC.”

“I don’t understand,” MC stutters in confusion.

“All those negative thoughts telling you that you’re overweight, they’re all lies, MC. Ask anyone, you are literally underweight if we’re being honest.” Jake hugs her, brushing his hand through her tangled hair. “MC, I.” His brow furrows as he tries to figure out how to express his thoughts. “You are perfect just the way you are, MC.”

“It’s not enough though,” MC sniffles.

“You are Enough,” Jake says slowly, pulling away. “You are Enough for me, more than enough. I don’t deserve you, MC. You are beautiful, lively, sweet, energetic. Even when you’re like this, hair tangled, tears streaming down your face, still in your pajama shorts and my shirt on, you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

“Do you really think so?” MC wipes her eyes, a small smile forming on her chapped lips.

“You trust me?”

“Yes.”

“Then you are Beautiful. You are Gorgeous. You are Lovely. You are Stunning. You are Cute and Adorable, Endearing. You are More than Enough. You are my World, my Everything.” Jake kisses her, “And I love you.”

A small smile spreads across MC’s face as the hacker brushes his thumb over her cheek.

“Also, I may have lied about breakfast, Cleo actually made it.” Jake smirks, “She gave me a batch of her world famous cinnamon rolls just for you and me a few days ago, I just put it in the oven.”

“Jake?”

“Yes, MC?”

“Thank you for everything.”

“I love you, don’t ever forget that. You Are Mine.” He states, kissing her mouth, dragging his teeth over her bottom lip.

MC gasps, a warm feeling pooling in her stomach as Jake's hands find themselves at her waist.

Jake smirks against the kiss, gently rubbing his thumbs across MC's hips. "Eat first, and then we'll continue." With that he took her hand and led her to the kitchen, MC biting her lip out of excitement of the promised future.

I hope you enjoyed reading this! Please comment any thoughts you have, I would love to actually talk to any of you! Love you! :)

[little-miss-moonstone]

The Red Thread (Carmy x OC)

Chapter Three | The Phone Call

Next | Previous | Series Master List

Summary: Carmy comes over for dinner.

WARNING: bad language, anxiety, flashbacks?, little editing. idk what else.. you know the drill, let me know if i missed anything :)

2019

Rori danced around her new apartment putting away items from the few moving boxes she had left. It had always been a dream of hers to live in New York City, and now that was her reality. To her, life seemed like it couldn’t get any better, she had her new apartment, she was halfway through writing a book she knew was a masterpiece, and she and Carmy were now living in the same city, again. And the most exciting part of all of that, to her, was that Carmy had no clue she had even moved to the city, only a few blocks from him. She almost wanted to run over to his apartment and surprise him, but she knew he would be calling her in only a few minutes, and thought of how nice it would be to hear the happiness in his voice. As if he knew she was thinking of him, her phone began to ring. She killed the music and dashed over to her phone.

“Hey,” she smiled, pressing the phone to her ear as she made her way to sit by the window that looked out at the city.

“Hey, what are you up to?” He asked, sitting on his fire escape and smoking a cigarette.

“Nothing really, just waiting for your call. How was work, or do you not wanna talk about it?” She replied, waiting for the right moment to share her good news.

“No, it was the same. I, uh, was thinking about fishmas this morning,” He shared before taking a drag.

“Bear, that was, uh, an interesting night for everyone. I’m okay and you’re okay, we made it out. That’s all we can focus on. Donna is, well, Donna, and I don’t know what got into Mikey, but from what Richie tells me he’s okay,” She tried to comfort him and it did help, but that wasn’t what he was referring to.

“Yeah, I know. I was thinking about our talk, outside. You never finished what you had to tell me,” He reminded. It had been driving him crazy for the last 7 months, but he hadn’t dared to bring it up. Rori froze on the other end of the phone. Her mind went back to that night, a night she had tried so hard to forget, especially what he was now asking about. She could lie, say she forgot, or she could take a chance and tell the truth. Her mind combed through all the moments from their teens and early 20s, the brushing of fingers, the glances across rooms, the tension, and flirtatious undertones.

“Uh, yeah, umm. I don’t know if it’s really all that important anymore,” She spoke in a shy demeanor, this was something Carmy easily picked up on.

“Come on, Rori. It’s you and me, you can tell me anything,” He promised, just as he always had. The caring nature of his voice made her fold like a piece of paper.

“Carmy, I-I want to tell you, and I’ve wanted to for a while I just don’t know how. You and I, we’re solid, and this might change that,” She explained.

He knew what she had to say. It was what he had wanted to say for years, but the thought of it all going wrong had silenced him. He couldn’t stand the thought of her leaving him and he knew it would happen. He couldn’t give her the love she deserved. The words “You are nothing” began to ring through his mind.

“Tell me,” were the only words he could get out.

“I’m in love with you. I have been since we were kids,” She confirmed. They were both quiet, neither of them wanting to speak, but as the seconds passed by her anxiety began to take over. “I knew I shouldn’t have said anything. It was stupid, God, just- we can forget about it, right? Pretend I didn’t say anything.”

“It’s o-okay, uh, we- we can just- uh, we can talk tomorrow,” He replied. This was his way out.

“Okay, uh, I’ll talk to you then,” She replied before she hung up the phone. She stared out at the city as tears slipped down her face, she knew deep down they would never be the same.

Present Day (2022)

Rori was preparing dinner, she didn’t know if Carmen would even be hungry but she couldn’t help to think how nice it would be to cook for him. She was making a classic carbonara, something they both grew up eating. She was stirring the egg yolks rapidly when she heard the knock on her door.

“Just come in, Carmy!” She yelled from the kitchen, while she continued to stir.

He was shocked her front door was unlocked, this was Chicago after all. What if it hadn’t been him at the door and some maniac had just barged in? He locked the door behind him, finding his way to her kitchen easily, as he followed the delicious smell. He found her in front of the stove, her back to him as he took his surroundings in.

“Y’know, it’s really unsafe for you to leave your front door unlocked,” He got her attention, as she turned the heat off and began plating.

“I know, but I knew you would be here soon, and had I come to the door we would’ve had noodles and scrambled eggs,” She informed while she plated the food. “I didn’t know if you had eaten yet or at all today, but don’t feel like you have to.”

“No, no. I haven’t,” He assured, “This looks great. Is this your mom’s recipe or my mom’s?” He asked, bringing his plate closer to inspect.

“Your mom’s. I prefer her sauce,” She gave a soft smile, “Uhh, let me get you something to drink, I have water, wine, or whiskey.” She turned to the cabinet where she kept the glasses.

He chuckled at the options, “Water is fine.”

She quickly got him and herself a glass of water, while directing him where to get forks, and then they switched out items. It was for a brief second they both felt a moment of domestication like he had come home from work to her cooking dinner. They both shrugged the thought from their minds, taking a bite, and letting the dish take over.

“Wow. Don’t tell her, but this might be better than mom’s,” He smiled. He was being genuine and she knew that, returning the smile.

“Oh, I wouldn’t dream of telling her that. She would kill me, then you,” She chuckled. There was a brief moment of silence before she spoke, again, “I haven’t talked to her since Mikey, I, uh, figured I would just give her some space. I actually haven’t even told my parents I moved back, either. I- well, that situation hasn’t changed in the last 3 years. I, uh, well, my mom’s like your mom, and my dad is…”

“M.I.A.,” He finished her sentence. His mouth continued before his mind could catch up. “Have you spoken to him since that night?”

“No, I don’t think I can. He just left so easily, like I was nothing to him. I’m worth more than that. I miss him, though, the old him. I think about that version of him a lot. How he used to take us for ice cream, or how he and your dad would joke abo-“ she stopped herself, “while we played in the yard, or whatever.”

They continued eating through casual conversation and when they were done she rinsed their plates and left them in the sink to wash later. He moved into her living room looking around at the pictures on the mantle. One of Rori and Mikey from what had to be only a couple of years ago, one of her and Sugar from her first book signing, one of her holding Eva the day she was born, and lastly, one of the two of them from Fishmas, it was different from the one he had of them. In this one they were both smiling, only she was looking at the camera and he was looking at her. He remembered that moment, it was just after the picture he had was taken.

“We won’t have another Christmas like that, I fear,” She joked while taking a seat on her couch. He let out a soft chuckle before taking the seat opposite of her.

“I guess, we should talk about the elephant in the room,” She suggested and the atmosphere changed back to between comfortable and awkward, and Carmy couldn’t stand it.

“Honestly, this is all my fault. I-I, well you know how I am, I push people away. You gave me an opportunity to push you away that night and I took it. I know it was a dickhead move and I’m really sorry. I completely understand if you can’t forgive me, we can just carry on and I won’t bother you at al-“ He was cut off.

“I forgive you.”

He sat there for a moment trying to process the words that had come out of her mouth. How could she forgive him that easily, after he had completely cut her out of his life? She couldn’t even forgive her father for basically doing the same thing.

“You forgive me?” He repeated, not quite believing it only took an apology and his idiotic rambling.

“I forgive you. Carmy, all I ever wanted was an apology and a fucking explanation. You just gave me both. I want us to start fresh, well, like from before that night. I know it’ll probably take some time for us to get back to that, but I’m willing to give it a shot. If you are,” She replied and he smiled at her forgiving nature. He was about to agree, but she continued, “On one condition.” He nodded, almost begging her to speak, he would do anything to ensure she was back in his life like she was before.

“If you ever think you can pull some bullshit like that on me, again. I swear to God, Carmy, I will beat your ass. You don’t get to push me, of all people, away,” She was firm and yet, gentle and he couldn’t help to admire that.

He nodded, “I wouldn’t expect anything less from you.”

From there the two fell into a comfortable conversation catching up on the last few years and then reminiscing on their youth. She was in the middle of telling him a story about a night out she had in London last year and he couldn’t help to think of how lucky he was to be sitting in her home with her, while she seemed to be enjoying his presence. He felt almost whole for the first time in years, and he knew it was her that had been missing.

It was late when Carmy left, both of them so caught up in conversation that it would be a rough day running on little sleep. Sugar beating on Rori’s front door didn’t help as she jolted awake to see it was 6:45 in the morning. Rori opened the door in her sweatshirt and shorts she had slept in, along with bedhead, and an unamused look on her face.

“Good morning, Sunshine. How was your dinner date with Carmy?” Sugar smiled pushing past Rori into the house.

“Oh, fuck off. You woke me up to be nosy? You couldn’t just call me at lunchtime?” Rori huffed, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

“Did he sleep here? Oh my god, is he in your room?” She asked, quieting her voice and throwing Rori for a loop. The girl felt like her brain had short-circuited at the thought of Carmen staying over, much less in her bed.

“What? No, he did not sleep here,” Rori got defensive.

“Oh, I drove by at 10:30 last night and I saw his car was still here, s-“

“You did what!? Sugar, I cannot believe you were stalking us,” Rori sighed, rubbing her hands over her face in frustration. “Okay, I’m going to give you a summary of the night and then you're going to get the hell out of my house, and then I’ll give you a call when I’m not as angry as I am right now, okay?” When Sugar nodded, she continued, “He came over, we had dinner, he apologized, and I forgave him. Goodbye,” Rori finished guiding her friend outside. She shut the door, and locked it, leaving Sugar on her front porch while she returned to bed.

Only now that she was lying in bed, she was wide awake. Fucking Berzatto’s, she thought to herself as she leaned over grabbing her laptop from her nightstand. She sat up to work on the squeal she promised her publisher would be done by the end of the year. In her defense, she had half of the year left, but she also had only written a few chapters. She opened her notes and began mapping out the rest of the story.

Carmy had already been at the restaurant for a couple of hours, his mind not allowing him much sleep. When Sydney arrived at the restaurant she noticed that he was in the best mood she had ever seen him in, her first thought was he got laid, but she couldn’t imagine he was into hookups and she knew he wasn’t in a relationship. She began her prep while trying to figure out if she should ask, or just enjoy a happy Carmy for once. She let it go knowing Richie would ask, but when he arrived he didn’t. He did notice, and he wanted to ask, but the fact that it could have something to do with Rori made him bite his tongue, that was until she stopped by the restaurant just in time for family. While she was formally introducing herself to Sydney and signing her copy of “The Red Thread”, Richie decided to take this opportunity to question Carmy.

“Yo, Cousin,” He said, getting the younger man’s attention, “This whole “Mr. Nice guy” thing doesn’t have anything to do with Rori Bear, does it?”

Carmy almost smiled at the nickname he hadn’t heard in year, but he caught himself. “Uh, I don’t know. I went to her house last night, we, uh,” Richie seemed extremely hopeful in that moment, “talked about- I apologized. Um, we’re just kind of starting over from where we left off.” He explained, and while that was still great news, Richie was hoping there was more.

“You just apologized?” He asked, “You guys just talked like that’s all?” Carmy could tell what he was implying and it reminded him of the talks he used to get from him and Mikey.

“Cousin, stop. We’re not doing this. Rori and I are back at a place where we actually talk to each other and she doesn’t seem to be freaking out about being in the same room as me. So we’re going to leave it right there, okay? I don’t need you putting all that bullshit in my head like you and Mikey used to.” He assured.

“Bullshit? Cousin, are you fucking stupid?” Richie questioned.

“Yo. I just said we're not fucking doing this. Go take your seat for family,” Carmen ordered.

Rori sat in between Carmy and Richie at the table, Tina was quick to start up a conversation with the girl having not seen her in a few years. Rori could feel Carmy briefly tense up when her time working at The Beef came up, and it didn’t help when Richie joined in. She tried steering the conversation to a new topic knowing Carmy would ask about her time at the restaurant. She thought he might forget if the topic changed a few times. Sydney started gushing over her book and trying to get any information about the sequel.

“I mean Rose and Cameron have to end up together, right? Like they can’t be that oblivious, especially when everyone around them is constantly telling them,” Sydney explained. Carmy turned to listen, wanting more details of the book he hadn’t read yet.

“You would be surprised. I know some real stubborn motherfuckers, who make Rose and Cam look normal,” Richie entered the conversation.

“Cousin, quit acting like you read it,” Carmy let out a small laugh.

“I did fucking read it, all 319 pages! And let me tell you Cameron’s a real jagoff. How can he be so in love with Rose and then do fuck all about it, and then be miserable? Stupid rat does it to himself,” Richie remarked, jolting up from his chair.

“Okay, Richie. It’s fictional, let's not lose our heads,” Rori guided him back down to his chair. “Guys, I’m going to be honest. I’ve only written a few chapters of the next book, and I have no clue yet whether they are going to end up together or not in the end, but even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you. You’ll just have to find out when I send your copies,” She smiled, returning to her food.

When family wrapped up, Carmy was quick to step out back for a smoke break, learning that Rori worked at the restaurant, and all the talk about a book he felt guilty for not reading, was taking up his mind. He wasn’t expecting her to come join him, she had never cared for the smell of cigarette smoke, so when she asked for a drag, he was completely caught off guard. He studied her face trying to pick up on any subtle hints as to if she was joking and when she furrowed her brows in confusion, he knew she was serious. He cautiously handed it over watching to see if she inhaled when she took a drag.

“When did you start smoking? You hated it when we were kids,” He asked, leaning back on the brick wall. He could tell she was reading him like a book with his cigarette between her lips, and he hated how much he adored it and how jealous he was of a fucking cigarette.

“Like 3 years ago. I thought it would help with the stress and anxiety. News flash, it fucking doesn’t. I don’t allow myself to smoke all the time, but with this next book, I might become a chain smoker,” She gave a small giggle and handed him back the nicotine stick.

“When did you work here?” He asked before he could stop himself.

“Pandemic. I moved back temporarily and Mikey needed help, and I had writer's block so I figured “What the hell”. It wasn’t long, maybe a few months. I, uh, do you know who Nico is?” She wondered, not wanting to snitch on Mikey. When Carmy nodded she continued, “I caught them, Mikey and Richie, they were back here in the alley dealing. I was pissed, Mikey and I got into this huge fight, mostly over the coke. He told me I couldn’t work here anymore, he didn’t want me around his “bullshit” because I had made something of myself,” She paused again, “He felt the same way about you.”

It was silent, both of them just looking at each other as he passed the cigarette back to her. It was comfortable, but only for a second. Carmy couldn’t figure out if they were the same people they were three years ago, there was still so much he didn’t know about her. He was relatively the same, but it was as if she had lived a thousand different lives.

“Where were you living before the pandemic, and before now?” He didn’t want her to feel like it was an interrogation, but he was just so curious. He noticed her slightly tense up and for a moment he regretted even asking, but that was only until he heard her mutter the words, “New York City.”

“You were in New York?” There was a mix of emotions behind his words, he wasn’t even sure what he felt in that moment. Was he upset, confused, or was he angry?

“Yeah, I moved there the day of the phone call. I was going to tell you, but I didn’t really get the chance. I’ve been there for the last three years. A few blocks from Madison Park,” She confirmed.

Carmen felt like an even bigger dickhead at that moment. All he could think about was the fact that he threw away what could’ve been the best years of their lives. What if, instead of pushing her away that night, he pulled her closer? He thought of all they could’ve done together in the city away from this breeding ground of family trauma and anxiety, they could’ve been so happy… together.

A/N: I’m so sorry for the delay. I got caught up with my birthday this past weekend, work, and registering for classes because i decided to go back to school.. not to mention the fucking Calvin Klein ad and the golden globes. Ugh, anyways, I hope you’re enjoying so far and hopefully another chapter will be out soon!!

[yorozuyaxxangelsxxicons]

Gintama Sentence Starters: Funny Edition

Gintoki: "Blah blah blah... Put a lid on it. Are you in heat, or what?" "I mean, I get so cranky if I don't have sugar." "Was your sister raised by a gorilla or something!?" "Ow ow ow ow ow!! What did you do!? Is that my brain leaking out?" "I-it should be okay, you know... Wake Up TV's astrology segment said... I'd be lucky this weekend." "Whoever ate it, raise your hand now, and I'll only kill you three-fourths of the way." "Can't you say something like, 'Leave me, ____, you go on ahead'?" "How long are you going to go on and on and on like some stupid, gum chewing, Kyoto girl on her cell phone?" "SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE, FREAK!" "So, what do we do now? Can we touch your ass or something?" "Clearly you're the one who needs help! You can't do jack shit!" "GIVE ME YOUR BALLS." "'Is this love?' My ass!" "It's all my fault. If only I hadn't gone to pachinko! I'll repay you by doubling it in pachinko!" "Believe in yourself! Believe in the dick of the owner you believe!" "You have an ultimate move, even though I don't? Isn't that unfair?" "T-Toei Animation's gonna kill us!" "What? I never said I was talking about you. You actually thought your family was rich? You actually call yourself Richie Rich?" "Mr. Kakashi from Class N had his Sharingan stolen after school yesterday." "Hey, bitch. I'm done with Kingdom, so get me all the volumes of Terra Formars within three minutes, or I'll have your head." "I'll curse your family for seven generations, damn you!" "It was far too large to be called a sword stuck in my ass."

Shinpachi: "Sheesh!! You hide a filthy soul behind those beautiful eyes!" "You two think that anything with a mustache is Mario, don't you!?" "Why are you pretending to break your bones!?"

Kagura: "Don't need a license to hit and run, yessir!" [text] Good morning. Your poop is very smooth today! "We're not toilet paper for you bastards to wipe your asses with!" "Behold me, the 30,014th shogun!"

Hijikata: "You wanna sleep permanently? Huh?" "Why leave the party, pal? It's a nice fight. Let's have some fun!" "What do you mean you missed!? Hey! Look at me!" "Okay. Don't come back." "Then how about a handshake? I'm a real Bentendo fan." "You Zega fans should be quiet and play your Creamcast, stupid. Keep waiting for your sequel to Shenmue, stupid." "I'm going to defeat Breeza!" "Hey, just give me some balls. You have some, right?" "Have you heard of a penile break?" "I'll lick the soles of your sandals or anything you ask me to!" "You can use the tepid kiddy bath over there. It's probably your style." "I don't remember allying with you, either. Crazy bitch." "You're not innocent, are you!?"

Okita: "He doesn't look hurt, but trust me he's suffering inside." "Just so you know, I was supposed to work really hard today, but I took the day off." "Isn't he stereotypical? He thinks he's Vegeta. He's planning on casually joining in." "Go buy me a Yakisoba pan, and JUMP, too. Of course, you pay for them." "I'm going to investigate whether the octopus balls actually have octopus meat in them." "I'll cut right to the chase. Could you let ____ fuck your robot girl over there?"

Other: "Look, you just keep your mouth shut." "Your heart isn't big enough to embrace their wonderful flaws, and that's why you aren't popular with the ladies!" "A leader must use any means possible to lead his organization to victory. As such, you'll play Uno with me! Because I'm good at Uno!" "____ made me pay 108 yen for a Yakulk the other day. Did they make you pay, too? It wouldn't be fair if I was the only one who had to pay." "Quit acting like you're a leader already, damn errand boy." "To remove this apparatus, either go to your nearest church or withdraw 3 million yen from an ATM and deposit it to my account." "If sorry was enough, seppuku wouldn't exist in the world." "In my country, '(insult)' is just how we end sentences. I wasn't implying anything, (insult)." "Is she a man or Orochimaru?" "Quit talking about my butthole like it's some parking stall!" "The hell are you doing in my house!?" "Why are you sneaking into my house in the middle of the night to make fried rice all dramatic-like!? And turn off the damn music! It's bothering the neighbors!" "You're the one... who bent me over."

Other (Multiple Lines): "Now we can't use the 'I wanna eat your cooking' line." "Oh, well. Skip a few steps and go with 'I wanna eat you' instead." "That's skipping too many steps! What kind of irresponsible advice is that!?" "I'll help you outta there. 'hee, hee, hoo' got that? Together now. 'hee, hee, hoo'." "I'm not a pregnant woman, you moron!" "This is ____, and this is ____. Understand? Let's write them down ten times each." "Oh, fuck you!"

[unfinishedslurs]

Flip of a coin

(I got really into Richie and Patty fics for a while so this is based off all the ones I read. Which was every single one published before roughly halfway into 2021)

Patty remembers that Stan always had a strange obsession with Richie Tozier.

He kept up with the news around him, watched his specials even though he rarely laughed and hated them with a passion. I don’t know why, Babylove, he’d say, but I don’t think he writes his own stuff. Have you seen his interviews? They’re much funnier. It was one of his little oddities, like his need to buy every Bill Denbrough book ever published, or buy clothing from the Rogan&Marsh line, even though he’d never much cared for fashion. These obsessions made a lot more sense after Stan’s hastily scratched letter, detailing a clown and impossible things that Patty clung to in a desperate attempt to rationalize.

She knows, distantly, though gossip and magazines at the store, that he’d broken down on stage the same day Stan died. She knows he’d cancelled all his future events, made a serious video where he confessed the ghostwriters, came out as bisexual, and said he was going to take a break from comedy.

According to the internet, he’s currently on a cocaine binge in Guatemala. According to Patty’s eyes, he’s in Georgia, looking less like a man on cocaine and more like a man whose life had been steamrolled with no idea what to do with the empty space left behind.

“Patty Uris?”

She looks at him, and sees a tragedy told in three parts. A greeting, some growing, a goodbye. She looks at him, and sees a mirror.

She looks at him, and knows he sees her too.

“Blum-Uris, actually,” she says, and opens the door to let him inside.

—

“You could always try voice acting.”

“You sound like my manager. I came here to get away from my manager.”

—

Richie makes Patty laugh for the first time since Stan died

—

Richie has a nice chest for crying, she thinks, and hysterical laughter tumbles out with her tears.

—

“It’s just…I love them. I do. They’re my family, God, they deserve every happy ending they get, but I’m jealous. I’m jealous and angry and I don’t understand why they get to move on when...”

“Our happy ending was with them.”

“Yeah, that.”

They stayed silent for a while, until Richie breaks it by taking a swig and saying, “Bev’s pregnant.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, she’s freaking out about it. I don’t think they meant to have a baby this soon. Or ever. I don’t think they realized that with the clown gone they could have a baby. And she just got out of her shitty marriage after her childhood with a shitty dad, and…yeah, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. She’s had about five panic attacks since she found out.”

“When did she find out?”

“Yesterday.”

Patty isn’t resentful. She thinks of all the years she and Stan spent trying to conceive, and how they eventually decided they’d be better off waiting anyways. They’d looked up adoption agencies a few times, but ultimately agreed it wasn’t the right time. She isn’t sure whether she’s grateful they never got around to it, that she doesn’t have to be a parent all on her own on top of everything else, or if the fact that she could have a piece of Stan right now, a small, babbling infant with his eyes and blood, makes her want to cry. Probably both.

She isn’t resentful, but she is jealous. It doesn’t matter. She’s a big girl, she can handle it.

She is going to be the best aunt ever.

“Do you think she’d appreciate another girl talking her through it?”

“Probably. You should call her and see.” He takes another long pull. “They want to name it after one of them. Stan or Eddie. Maybe both. She asked me to ask you whether you’d be okay with that.”

It takes a minute for that to register, and another five to get around the ache in her throat. “That’s…he’d love that.” He would. He’d pretend it bothered him, or that he wouldn’t want it, but he’d probably cry the minute he heard it.

Traditional, too, to name the baby after him, though she wasn’t sure he’d care so much about that part. She doubted his friends even realized.

“That a yes?”

No. “Yes.”

—

“He said…Patty,” he sobs. “Patty, he loved me back. He loved me back, but it didn't matter because he died and he’s gone and I spent two months begging and praying and getting drunk off my ass and it didn’t matter because he’s fucking dead.”

“It mattered to him, Richie.”

“Not enough to survive. Not enough to fucking say it without choking on the fucking blood in his mouth just to say—” he chokes the words down.

She rubs his back. “Don’t let it fester,” she reminds him, and the dam breaks.

“Why the fuck didn’t I just say it?” He explodes. “Why the fuck did I spend my entire fucking childhood pining for his firey ass when we could have had some fucking time? Why didn’t he say something? If he’d just fucking said it sooner, said anything…he was always the brave one between us. And it ended up with him fucking dead, and me on this fucking couch with you crying over misssed opportunities like a fucking…I dunno, Pats.”

“I know.”

“I don’t mean I don’t like sitting here with you,” he adds unnecessarily. They both know it’s unnecessary. She lets him do it anyway. “I just wish we were bonding over fucking…wedding photos or some shit.”

If she lays her head back and closes her eyes, she can picture it.

—

Patty breaks her fist on the wall.

It was bound to happen eventually. She’s been cycling through the anger stage of her grief for a month. Something was going to give.

Not the wall, though.

Richie takes her to the hospital.

“Sorry,” she says on the way there. She thinks she may be crying. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to, it just happened, I swear—”

“Patty.”

“I’m sorry,” she says again. She’s not talking to Richie anymore. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry—”

She doesn’t realize that he’s pulled over until he’s grabbing her by the shoulders and pulling her into his arms, both of them leaning uncomfortably over the gearshift. She doesn’t mind.

“I don’t understand,” she sobs into his chest. “I don’t know what I did wrong. Why couldn’t he just stay?

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Richie says. She thinks she can feel him shaking. “It…he made his choices.”

She pulls away, suddenly furious. “That’s the problem! He fucking made that choice! He deliberately decided to leave me! And everyone says that he must have been suffering, that he must have been secretly unhappy, but I know better. We were fucking happy! Life wasn’t fucking perfect, but it was good. And he threw it all away, for—for what? What the hell was it all for?”

“I dunno, Pats, I think it was to save me and my friends,” Richie says dryly, and she knows, okay, she knows she’s angry, she knows he uses humor as his coping mechanism, she knows those two things can make a deadly combination that will leave ash in her mouth for weeks.

She says it anyways. “And look how well that worked out.”

His face shutters, and the regret comes pouring in as he turns back to the steering wheel without saying anything else. “Richie…”

“I know,” he says, holding up a hand. “I know you didn’t mean it. Let's get you to the hospital already.”

The rest of the drive is silent.

—

“Richie, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, Pattycakes. I forgive you.”

“I know, but I need to say it anyways, because I’m glad you’re here, Rich. I want you here. It’s just…”

I wish things were different.

“I get it.”

“Yeah.” He doesn’t, not really, but it’s the closest thing she has. Just like she’s the closest thing he has. They’re two sides of the same coin, aren’t they?

“I blame him sometimes, you know?” Richie admits quietly. “For Eddie. It was supposed to be the seven of us…sometimes I think we could have all made it out, if he hadn’t been such a fucking—” he breaks off, taking his glasses off to rub a hand over his face. “Sorry.”

“No, I get it.”

They smile at each other, bitter things in a bitter world, because she knows Richie’s thinking the same thing she just was. She doesn’t get it, not really, but she knows better than anyone the pain of loving and hating Stanley Blum-Uris.

Flip of the coin. Heads, a life together, tails, a life apart.

—

They’re not filling the holes in each other’s lives. They’re too…them for that. There’s nothing romantic about the way Patty will sometimes make Richie’s coffee with two sugars and no cream and break down, or the days Richie will get a far off look in his eye when she does, and then they’re both mourning two different kinds of loss. They’ll never know how Eddie liked his coffee, after all.

Nothing romantic about the nights Richie wakes up screaming Eddie’s name either. They both have nightmares, but Patty’s are quieter.

They’re not filling the holes, but they’re not not filling them either. Hole-adjacent. The ache in Richie’s voice when he says Pats instead of Eds, the equal aching in her chest when she wakes up to see a dark head that isn’t her husbands.

So, no, they’re not in love. She doesn’t feel that way about him. Doesn’t think she could, even without the dead hovering over their shoulders like shrouds. They’re too similar in their differences, not each other’s types, any number of reasons they could never fall in love.

Sometimes, though, she wishes they did. Wishes Richie were the one she met at that party, wishes Richie wore a matching wedding band to the one she’s moved to her right finger.

She knows it’s less about Richie, though, and more about not feeling like she’s being picked at from the inside out. The fantasies are there because he is, not of any actual desire for a romantic connection. Doesn’t stop her from dreaming.

She only voices it to him once.

“Do you think, if things were different, we would have made a good couple?” Patty doesn’t really think so, or want to think about it, but the wine is making her maudlin and she misses him. Misses Stan so much her insides feel like a bag of rocks that’s just waiting to split open and spill out every part of her. She hates it, the missing. More than anything.

Richie snorts.

“No, really.”

“Maybe, Batty-Patty,” he says, shooting her a grin that misses humor by a mile.

She laughs at that. “I am batty for asking, aren’t I?”

“I wasn’t going to say anything.” He did, just through the name, but she won’t point it out.

“We’re not compatible.”

“Nope.” He punctuates it with a drink.

“I wish we were,” she says fiercely. “I wish I’d fallen in love with you instead.”

He lowers his glass, expression somber, and watches her for a minute. Whatever he sees in her face makes his mouth quirk.

“You don’t mean that,” he tells her.

“I want to.”

“And I want to have not wasted my career parroting other people's bullshit. It is what it is, Batsy.”

That makes her giggle, despite herself. “Batsy?”

“What, you don’t like it?”

“I love it,” she says. She does. It’s fitting. “Pour me another glass.”

He indulges her, then himself. “We never could have been a good couple,” he says, trying and failing to seem flippant, “but, you know, my mom always wanted me to have a sister.”

“A sister, huh?” She stares at him, considering. “Is that what we are? Siblings?”

“Well, no,” he shrugs, “but I think it fits better than anything else.”

—

They make a chore chart.

It’s kind of dumb, Patty thinks. Objectively. They’re not college kids, they should be able to do housework on their own, without prompting.

She and Stan had never needed one.

But that’s the whole problem, isn’t it? Stan’s gone, and Richie’s here, and they both have days where they can’t even get out of bed, much less remember to make dinner or wash the dishes. The chart helps. It helps a lot.

—

Patty doesn’t sing much anymore.

—

She and Richie both have a four drink limit, established sometime between the third time Richie finds her sobbing in the bathtub, and the seventh time Patty finds him comatose on the floor. They pretend not to notice when the other breaks it.