#okay it's not that bad but i cut it rlly deep right through half the nail & everything :

[fluentisonus]

fucked up my thumb 😔

[bitterbutblue]

What if i request Robin x Fem!Reader where Robin felt a bit pressured from the media and as her beloved girlfriend you help her relief stress :33

It can be fluff or smut, i dont rlly care i just want more Robinnn content :333

Thank you in advance!!!

Also can i be 🍷 anon? :3

you're not bad, but rather good ☆ robin x fem!reader

~ omg hi!!!! ur my first anon this is so exciting.... i don't do smut but i can totally do fluff.. anything 4 u <3

gonna start naming out the song lyrics i've been using as titles

loveable ~ jo yuri <3 ~

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────

Robin's recent comeback- a miserable failure.

Robin's new EP 'Welcome To My World' has been nothing but a colossal failure. With each new album, Robin continues to disappoint- fans are sick of her low effort songs and lack of stage presence. Her comeback stage shows her clearly lack of passion. Just because she has made a name for herself does not mean she can now slack off on stage when fans pay thousands to see her-

You closed the article before you finished reading it. If you continued, you probably would've ended up throwing your phone across the room or do something along the lines of that sort of stupidity that you would end up regretting later. That article was like a knife through the heart for Robin but for you it was a knife through the author's decaying and bleeding out body as you stab that fucker over and over again. Okay, maybe that was too violent but fuck you can't stand to see people say such bullshit about your girlfriend. She called you at work, crying and saying she couldn't do it anymore. You could barely make out her words through her sobs and the bad signal (which led you to believe she was hiding in the bathroom).

"I worked so hard, I don't know what they want from me. I can't-"

"Robin, baby, deep breaths- okay? I'm right here, it's okay."

It infuriates you, how people can run their mouths and say whatever bullshit that comes to their mind just because they're not satisfied with their own miserable lives. Just because they feel like dragging someone down would perhaps make themselves feel better about the fact that someone half their age is more successful than they will ever be. You want to tell her that you'll fucking find them and make their life a living hell but that's definitely not what she wants to hear right now.

"What do they want from me? I'm so tired, I don't wanna do this anymore."

All you really could do was continue to comfort her, hoping that she can pick up what you're saying through the static and cut offs due to bad internet. You just stayed with her until her cries became sniffles and she stated that she has to go before they suspect anything. You swallowed back your worry and just nodded.

"Okay. I love you, Robin.

You can feel her smile from across the phone.

"I love you."

That night you spent the entire evening in the kitchen, prancing around and trying not to burn the eight things you have going on the stove as you flip through your phone to find that recipe for the thing in the oven that looks horrifically bad.

"Ah fuck..."

You check the time- 8:03, she should be back soon. You finally find the recipe page and you feel your heart drop. Fuck, you were supposed to bake it for 30 minutes- not 50! No wonder that shit looked so wrong! You scramble to pull it out of the oven, the timer with 5 minutes left. You groan when you see how it looks- first it looked wrong and now it was probably burnt too. So much for making your girlfriend's favourite dessert.

"Love?"

The soft voice startles you, yelping as you dropped the cake pan.

"Shit!"

Robin stands there in all her glory. She looks exhausted, eye bags worse than before and shoulders sagged but to you she was still the most beautiful woman you have ever laid your eyes on.

"Everything okay?"

She tries to smile at you but it looks so forced. You feel your heart clenching in your chest as you pick up the cake pan from the ground, moving it back onto the counter.

"Baby, just let me take care of you tonight?"

You pull her in close, hugging her tight. She freezes at first, before completely melting in your grasp. She lets out a shaky sigh as she buries her head in the crook of your neck.

"I missed you."

Her voice is muffled against your shoulder but you just smile as you tiptoe to press a kiss to her forehead.

"I missed you so much, baby." You pull away, cupping her face with your hands as you brush your thumb against her cheek. "You look beautiful."

"Don't lie."

She gets flustered so easily, face turning pink as she looks away but she can't stop the small smile from forming on her face.

"I'm not. You look beautiful."

She sighs as she looks back at you, and the tired expression on your usual warm and happy girlfriend really does hurt you. The way the media can tear people down into nothing but the most insecure parts of themselves has always rubbed the wrong way with you but watching it happen to the one you love most is absolutely heartbreaking.

"I made you dinner?"

"I saw."

Her smile is not as forced now as she looks around the kitchen, a soft giggle escaping her lips.

"Quite a mess you made."

You just shoot an embarrassed grin at her as you tried to hide the cake pan behind your back.

"Well, I'm not a good cook."

"I think you did amazing."

She steps forward, caging you between the counter and herself.

"You make the worst days brighter, you know?"

"You make each of my days better. It's only fair I do the same to you."

Robin looks down, playing with her hands.

"I don't deserve you."

"Oh shut up."

The kiss was soft, gentle and loving. She cups your cheeks as she steps closer, bodies pressed against each other as you pour all the love you can convey through a simple act.

"I love you. I really love you so much, Robin." You say breathlessly to her when you pull away. She doesn't say much, only resting her head on your shoulder as she takes your hand into her own, lacing your fingers together.

"And I'm so proud of you for your new comeback. You've worked so hard and it paid off. You keep outdoing yourself and the people who don't see that can fuck off and die."

She sighs.

"No need for the violence, yeah?"

"Violence is always the answer."

You feel your heart flutter when she lets out a soft laugh, like a songbird's first melody of a new spring.

"You do whatever you want." She says, resting a hand on your chest as she leans in to press a quick but soft kiss to your lips. "Thank you- for this."

"Always."

The food you cooked was mostly inedible- resorting to the two of you ordering takeout together but you couldn't care less about the burnt cakes or undercooked mac and cheese. Robin is smiling again, and that's all you wanted to achieve for the night.

Response to: Robin's recent comeback- a miserable failure.

Robinsdog: op do u not have a life

servallandau_official: No one thinks this.

⤷ talesofthewinterlandsfan222: serval spitting facts but also what r u diong here

⤷ servallandau_official: Do I know you?

⤷ talesofthewinterlandsfan222: ENEVRMIND

march4robin: im giong to find u my entire crew is oing to find u we will run out train into u

galaticstelleballer: i am also going to run my train into u. and my bat. both at the same time.

⤷ dh: Guys please.

Sunday_Oakfamily: We are taking this post and the writer off the platform.

The article you are searching for no longer exists.

[anyoneseenadam]

Hi! Could you do an azriel x reader where they have a huge argument but it ends with fluff? Thank you!

pairing: azriel x reader (acotar)

warnings: mentions of self harm and suicidal thoughts, depression, anxiety, shouting, swearing and a butt ton of angst but with some fluff at end

a/n: this is kinda self indulgent because i’m vvv depressed rn and for some reason angst rlly makes me feel better so i hope u enjoy!! pls comment it rlly means the world <3

—————————————————————————-

You knew Azriel was stressed. His hands clenched, lips red from excessive chewing, his gaze stormy and sharp words hurting anyone that pried to deep. You knew you should leave him alone and let him finish whatever he needed to do, but it had been a week and while you had noticed he was stressed, he seemed oblivious to your pain.

You had woken up a week ago with a heavy head, your entire body weighing you down, making everything seem too loud and too bright. The first day you had laid in bed all day, barely eating and when Azriel found you hours later he simply presumed you had just taken an early night.

But you couldn’t sleep.

A few days later you were practically withering away. You had barely eaten in days; you couldn’t sleep, and you missed your mate horribly. Every part of you ached as you dragged yourself into the shower, desperate to scrub away the layer of dirt you could feel on your skin. You stood under the scalding water, hands moving on their own accord to wash your skin, your head moving a million miles an hour as your eyes itched from the hot tears that were mixing with the even hotter water.

You leaned a hand against the counter when you got out, your legs shaky and weak from the lack of food you had consumed, you considered just getting back into bed, but you knew you needed help. You had gotten like this before and it always ended in some form of unhealthy coping mechanism, but you had promised Azriel you wouldn’t do that again so you instead you pulled your clothes on again, not bothering to dry your hair and dragged your feet to the kitchen.

When you didn’t find him there you frowned but went about making yourself some toast to quell the nausea brewing in your stomach. With your food you padded through your house but couldn’t find him anywhere, feeling more hot tears spill as you realised he was out.

You knew his job was hard, but your heart ached as you realised he truly hadn’t noticed the change. You sent a pulse down the bond as you sank to the floor in tears, your head heavy and heart numb. You didn’t get any reply, so you tried sending another one, to no avail, almost as if he were waving away your cries for help.

You cried for about fifteen minutes, before standing and going back through to your room, sitting on your bed, and staring at a blemish in the floor as you fiddled with the toy you had kept since you were young. You felt guilty for the thoughts running through your head, never wanting to make Azriel alone but feeling so lost in your own head that all you wanted to do was die, to feel the lightness you vaguely remembered enjoying as a child. You were standing to move to your bathroom, itching for your razor when you heard the front door open, relief flooding through you that he was finally home.

You walked out the room, fiddling with the sleeves of your oversized hoodie as you went to meet him. He was standing in the kitchen, shoulders tight and your heart panged at the sight of him, stressed and tired. You considered turning and leaving him but remembered that he told you to always come to him when your head was being cruel, so you shuffled forward, wrapping your arms around his back, and pressing your face between his shoulder blades, breathing easier as you inhaled him, your heart feeling some form of peace at last.

But he shrugged you off, moving away from you and you felt white hot dread fill you.

“Not right now (y/n), I’m busy.” His voice was cold as he made himself a cup of coffee, not offering you one as he usually would.

“I- I know I just haven’t seen you in a while.” You fought to keep your voice steady, but he didn’t seem to notice or care about the breaks. You felt your breathing getting deeper and your hands were tingling as the panic rose in you.

“That’s because my jobs fucking important!” he shouted and you flinched, tears swarming in your eyes as you wiped your sweating hands on your hoodie, stepping to him.

“But you said I should come to you if-“ he cut you off by slamming his hands down, shoulder hunched and glare furious as he shouted at you.

“Will you just fuck off! I have important shit going on.” You stopped where you were standing as he picked up his mug, storming out the room and slamming the door to his office behind him.

Tears spilled out of your eyes and you stumbled as you sat down, legs and hands going numb as you hyperventilated, the panic attack hitting you full force as you sobbed into your hands, trying to muffle the sounds so you wouldn’t bother Azriel anymore than you already had. You counted your breaths as you dug your nails into your palm, trying to calm yourself down and thankfully, slowly your breathing began to return to normal as you wiped at your eyes.

Of course he didn’t care. No one else does, you don’t deserve him, and you should be thankful that you have someone so good to you. Half your brain was arguing in his favour as the other half protested, but he hurt you, you can’t let him in again, this is what happens when people get to close.

Your head kept arguing with itself as you pulled yourself upright, walking through to your room and climbing under the covers of your bed, crying yourself to sleep, head pounding and somehow heavier than before.

--

You woke up to an empty bed and pounding headache. You dragged yourself out from under the covers and went to receive a glass of water and some painkillers, finding Azriel in the kitchen.

He smiled softly at you when you came in, but you averted your gaze, going to the sink and filling a large glass.

“Would you like a coffee?” he asked, his hand coming to your hip, but you shook your head, pulling out of his grip and clearing your throat as a weighted silence filled the room. “I’m sorry I shouted at you,” he muttered, desperate to get you to look at him again, but you just turned away, muttering a small “it’s okay,” under your breath and leaving.

You walked back to your room and sat down on the bed as you sipped your water and taking two painkillers. Azriel followed you in soon after, guilt gnawing at his insides and he stood quietly and watched as you pulled the jumper you were wearing over your head, pulling on a clean one.

He inhaled sharply as he saw the change in your body, moving closer to you.

“Have you been eating?” he asked, and you closed your eyes, facing away from him and staying silent as you no longer trusted your voice or temper. “Baby, you have to eat.” While he said it in a pleading manner, your brain heard it as angry, thousands of comments pertaining to how worthless you were springing to the forefront of your mind.

“It’s kinda hard to eat when you want to die.” You snapped and Azriel felt a pang go through his heart.

“(y/n). You promised me you would come to me if you felt that way,” he was frustrated, hating himself for getting annoyed at you but angry that you were ignoring him.

You laughed bitterly and you went to the bathroom, scrubbing the old makeup of your face, “I did. Or at least tried to,”

You stormed past him, pulling on a pair of joggers before moving to leave the house, but Azriel caught your arm.

“You haven’t done anything stupid have you?” he asked, worry and guilt filling him as your eyes filled with tears, finally looking at him enough that he could see the dark circles surrounding your hollow eyes, your skin dull and lacking its usual dewy finish.

“Why do you care.” You pulled your arm from his grip, stepping back and creating space between the two of you.

“Because you’re my mate and I need to know that you’re okay.” He tried to move closer again, but you stepped back so he stopped.

“Your mate huh? Then why haven’t I seen you in a fucking week, even though we fucking live together! Why are you only just noticing that I’m struggling!?” each word hit him like a blow and only his decades of training stopped him from bursting into tears, falling to his knees and begging your forgiveness.

“I was struggling so much, I couldn’t leave my bed, I wasn’t eating, I wanted to kill myself and as soon as I tried to reach out for help you shut me down.” You head was bowed, tears flowing freely as you sobbed into your hand.

He stepped closer his arms wrapping around you as you sobbed into his chest, “I’m sorry baby, I’m so, so sorry,” he kissed your head, his heart cracking at your next muffled words.

“You only care now because you feel bad. I don’t need your sympathy.”

“No baby, I’m sorry. I care so much I was just tired and stressed last night and I know that’s not an excuse, but you have to know how much I care about you. I love you so much and I need you to be okay.” He tightened his arms around you, bringing the two of you to kneel on the floor.

“I’m not okay Az,” you muttered, and his chest tightened as he stroked your back, allowing you to cry for as long as you needed.

“I know baby, but it’s okay. We’ll get through this, together.” He kissed your forehead lightly and you tilted your head to look at him, eyes wide and glassy with tears. He kissed one of the tears that was slowly trailing down your face away and you sniffed, before he kissed you lightly. He picked you up and carried you over to the bed, the two of you lying down together, tucked safely into his arms as he whispered sweet nothings and apologies to you as you fell asleep. Tears drying on their own.

[lifesabe-ch]

game on - john b. (part 1)

request: can u write about being one of kies friends and u come to visit her for a little and u and john b end up rlly liking each other and u hook up at a keg party or something like that ??? thank uuu

summary: you and your parents decide to come to the outer banks for your summer break, visiting your old friend kiara, but things quickly take a turn when you take a liking to one of her friends

pairings: john b. x reader

warnings: smut 

a/n: okay I know I said I wouldn’t write smut but this came to me and I had too!! reply to this if you want to be tagged in further parts

Holding your phone up dramatically, you wander around a little down the road from the house you were staying in. It was apparently impossible to get any bars there, so you figured you’d try a little further down.

“You’re not going to get any service here.”

Glancing behind you, you sigh as you bring your phone back down to your chest. As you glance at it you realize that you, in fact, were not getting any service here.

Ignoring the boy who was now trailing behind you, you continued your walk, desperately hoping for at least one bar to hold you over.

“Seriously. A storm happened a couple days ago, half of the island still has no power.”

“The half I’m on, apparently.”

He chuckled, nodding, “The half without generators, yeah.”

Shoving your phone back into your pocket, you took in his appearance for the first time. He was cute, in an island boy kind of way. He had longer hair and lighter colored eyes. He was ruggedly handsome, but he could tell that he knew it.

As he flashed you a smile, you realized that trouble was the word that came to mind.

“I’m John B.”

“Why not just John?

He shrugged, “It’s just what everyone calls me.”

You nodded, “Right. I’m Y/N.”

“Well, Y/N,” he spoke, almost as if testing out the feel of your name on his lips. “What brings you to the Outer Banks?”

“I’m here on vacation. Visiting a friend.”

He only nodded silently, taking you in. He wasn't being subtle and he didn’t seem to care. The longer you felt his eyes on you, the more you began to squirm.

Clearing your throat lightly, you gestured in the direction you had just come from, “I should, get back. You know, unpack.”

“Or,” He paused. You realized he did that often.

“I could give you a tour. It’ll be as good as it gets, from a born and raised Islander himself.”

You wanted to say no. You did. You wanted to go home, unpack, and relax. But this boy piqued your interest.

So you let him take you on a tour.

Later that night you had found yourself at a kegger. John B. had invited you, telling you that it was happening just near his house and that it’d be small. But small was not the word that came to mind as you took everything in. People were scattered everywhere, some dancing, some drinking, others both.

You had tried looking for John, but gave up rather quickly. You weren’t too bothered by it, instead just finding a nearby tree to lean up against. As you took everything in, a small sigh left your lips, swallowed by the cup you had quickly brought up to your lips.

It wasn't that you didn’t like it here. Hell, you had missed Kiara so much that when your parents suggested going to the Outer Banks for the summer, you immediately agreed. But you missed your friends. Your home friends. Maybe these parties were better, but at least back home you wouldn’t be standing around by yourself.

Feeling a hand on your arm, you turn to find Kie on the other side of you, a cup matching yours in hand, “Look who it is!”

You laugh, pulling her close for a hug, “Hey! I was starting to think I’d never bump into you.”

The two of you had been friends for as long as you could remember. When you were younger you lived next door to each other, insisting on spending every second together. Even after you had moved away, you kept in touch. Things weren’t the same but, you still considered yourself friends. Which is why you were here after all that time.

Pulling you away, Kie wrapped an around your shoulder, “What’re you doing here?”

You shrugged, “Someone invited me.”

“Seriously? Who was it?”

Before you can answer, you spot him. You see John B. a few feet away, talking and laughing with some of his friends. Your heart practically beats out of your chest.

Kie doesn’t notice, instead quickening her pace, “Guys!”

You see him glance up, eyes meeting yours before looking to where Kie’s arm was around you. As you got closer, you flash the small group a nervous smile. Standing besides John B. were two other boys.

“This is the friend I was telling you about!”  

“I don’t remember you telling us about her,” spoke the blonde, ignoring the way she shoved him in return.

“I’m JJ,” He continued, before gesturing to the others, “That’s Pope, and John B.”

You avoided John B.’s gaze as you took in the other two, “It’s nice to meet you all.”

Kie and JJ did most of the talking, arguing about something that you honestly couldn’t even remember. To say you were uncomfortable was an understatement. You could feel John B. staring at you, but you refused to look at him.

Nothing too crazy had happened on the little tour he had given you, but the two of you had definitely flirted with one another. There was even an almost kiss. And now…

You cringed to yourself as you remembered the awkward situation you had gotten yourself into. One day into this and you were already trying to hook up with Kie’s friends. You didn’t know how she’d react if you told her, but you weren’t planning on finding out. You’d simply pretend it didn’t happen.

Pulling you from your thoughts, you watched as a boy approached your group. He was seemingly more put together than the rest, but you didn’t like the vibes he was giving off.

Apparently, neither did the others.

“What’re you doing here?”

Glancing between you and JJ, the first to have spoken, the boy rolled his eyes, “It’s a party, isn’t it?”

“He means here,” John B. cut in. “Why’re you coming over to us?”

He didn’t bother responding, instead fixing his gaze on you with a grin, “I’m Rafe. I don’t think I’ve seen you around before.”

“Don’t even Rafe,” Kie started, shaking her head as she moved to stand beside you.

“Don’t what? I just wanted to ask her to dance.”

Glancing over at Kie, you merely shrugged, “One dance won’t hurt.”

“No. She’s not dancing with you.”

Scoffing, you rolled your eyes at John B., “Says who? It’s just a dance.”

At this, he stayed quiet, only watching as you took Rafe’s extended hand and let him pull you towards where people were dancing.

You didn’t mind dancing with him. He wasn't a bad dancer, nor was he too hard on the eyes. Part of you wished it was John B. dancing with you instead, but you reminded yourself that that couldn’t happen. You weren’t ruining your friendship with Kie over a boy. This one would just have to do.

As you felt Rafe’s hands trail down to your hips, your eyes found John B.’s, staring into you. Without looking away, you turned so that your back was against Rafe’s front, arms linked around his neck.

He looked angry, and that only fueled your movements against Rafe, letting yourself move against him to the beat of the music as his hands roamed your sides.

As the song comes to an end, you flash John B. a wink, turning your back to him as you move to face Rafe. Flashing him a smile, you lean up to his ear to whisper some excuse of having to go get another refill, before moving away. You feel bad for leading him on, but all you can think about is how annoyed you’re making John B. And how happy that’s making you.

As you walk towards a keg, you feel a hand wrap around your wrist. You don’t even have to look to know who it is.

Tugging you slightly, John B. gestures in another direction. Presumably with somewhere in mind, but to you... well, it meant nothing.

“What?”

The boy only raised a silent finger to his lips in response, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he began pulling you inside the small house, shutting the door behind the two of you.

Realizing the two of you were now completely alone, you grinned slightly. You knew what he wanted. Hell, you wanted it too. But, you weren’t going to give it to him that easily. Besides... you were practically in public. His friends, your friends, could walk in at any moment.

So instead, you begin walking around the small kitchen he had dragged you into. The mess on the counter space was enough to tell you that cleaning up wasn’t his number one priority.

“This is where you live?”

He nodded, leaning against the center island, “Yep. Home sweet home.”

“Nice.”

The silence that filled the air was palpable and you were definitely not going to be the one to break it. Leaning back against the counter opposite him, you simply flashed him a smile.

Taking a step closer to you, you watched as his eyes trailed over your frame before meeting yours again, “You know, I wasn’t gonna pull you inside but... I saw you talking to Rafe.”

He paused, taking in your features in hopes of some sort of reaction. You were careful not to give him too much of one.

“And?”

“And it drove me insane. I didn’t like seeing him with his hands all over you.”

With a shrug, you twisted the bracelet on your wrist, “Maybe I liked it.”

Scoffing, John B. ran a hand through his hair. Out of everything you could’ve said, he was not expecting that.

“Did you?”

“Maybe,” You started, stretching your leg out to lightly tap his foot with your own. “Maybe I like the thought of having him all over me.”

Stepping closer to you, you watched as his eyes grew dark, the hazel shade now replaced with a deep brown.

“You liked feeling his hands running up and down your sides? His body pressed up against yours?”

He was close to you now. So close you could count out each individual golden lash if you wanted to.

He brought his face down to yours, tilting his head so that his mouth was just inches from your ear.

When he spoke, his voice came out soft, “Do you want Rafe?”

You didn’t answer him. You couldn’t, it was like you’d forgotten how to breathe.

Pulling away just enough to stare down at your face, he planted his arms on either side of your body.

“Who do you want, Y/N?”

“You.”

With that he pulled you to him fully, wasting no time as he began peppering messy kisses across your jaw, down your neck, and to your collarbone.

A breathy laugh fell from your lips, and you ran a hand through his hair, muttering about how hot you found his jealousy. Smirking slightly at your comment, he began to suck lightly on your neck, letting your legs wrap around his waist as he lifted you up onto the counter.

“Wait,” You mutter, pushing him away slightly, “What if the others come in?”

“They won’t,” He assures you, using a hand to gesture towards the entrance, “I locked it.”

Looking between him and the door, you nodded slowly. You trusted him, sort of. If he says he locked it, he locked it.

Pushing a piece of hair behind your ear, he recaptured your gaze, giving you a soft smile. His pupils were still blown, but his demeanor had shifted.

“Do you want to do this?”

Pulling him closer to you, you brought your lips to his ear, mouth only centimeters away from him, much like he’d done to you before. When you spoke you were quiet, but you know he heard you.  

“I want you to fuck me.”

In no time his lips found their way back to your neck, sucking at the soft skin there and undeniably leaving a mark.

His hands moved confidently, one dipping down the front of your jeans and into your underwear. His fingers quickly find your wet entrance, his thumb gently playing with your slit as he thrusts two fingers into you. You rock your hips against his hand as he curls his fingers inside you, your eyes fluttering shut as you lean your head back against the cabinet. His other hand snakes its way up your top, quickly unhooking the bra you were wearing.

“Do you think Rafe could make you feel like this?”

His mouth was still on your neck, and his fingers were now set at a relentless pace. Your response comes in the form of a moan, your brain hyper focused on what he was doing to you, on how you were feeling.

As he began to palm your clit, you felt yourself coming undone. You attempt to brace yourself on his shoulders, your face falling into the crook of his neck.

Your breath is hot against his throat as you moan out a, “fuck,” nails digging into his skin. You were close, you could feel it.

But before you can finish, he pulls his fingers out of you, a small whine leaving your lips. Your eyes follow his hand as he pulls it out of your pants and up to his lips, sucking his fingers lightly.

Shifting your eyes away from his mouth, you note the smug look on his features as he pulls his fingers out with a ‘pop’. His lips quickly find yours, but the kiss doesn’t last nearly long enough, John B. pulling away far too soon for your liking.

“Maybe Rafe can help you finish?”

Pulling away from you completely, he slipped out of the kitchen with a grin, the shock on your face obviously the reaction he had been hoping for.

As you heard the front door close quietly behind him, you hopped down from the counter, quickly readjusting your clothing, all the while muttering to yourself.

When Kie told you were going to be meeting her friends, you did not imagine this. But game on, John B. Game on.

PART 2

[dazedbydazai]

Welcome Home pt. 2

PortMafia!Members x Reader (who is coming back home after a long trip overseas)

➤ Featuring: Chuuya & Akutagawa

➤ Genre: Fluff

Pt. 1 here w/ ADA!Members

(A/N: Okay I just couldn’t stop thinking about Chuuya & Aku with this scenario!! I’m still trying to work my way through other Port Mafia members so I’m sorry if it’s just these 2 for now. But I still hope you enjoy~  (*¯︶¯*)

➳ Nakahara Chuuya

He's been waiting at the airport for half an hour now and he was getting bored.

"Are you here yet?" "Where are you?" "Don't tell me you already left the airport?" "I'm here waiting for you, you know???"

His text messages flooded your notification and you shake your head as you walk towards the baggage claim.

Then he starts calling you.

"Y/N. Where are you?" He seemed annoyed.

Being the great S/O that you are, you decide to push his buttons a bit more.

"I'm right there, Chuuya~"

"What? Where? I don't see y-"

"In your heart~"

You couldn't help but laugh as you heard him groan.

"Seriously, Y/N," He sighs. "Should I just turn this whole airport upside down and look for you myself?"

"Wha-" You stop walking for a second before speaking. "Jesus, calm down Chuuya! I told you my flight was delayed a bit, right?"

"Yeah. But still!"

You sigh at his whining. "Be more patient, my love. I'll be there in a bit."

And that's all it took for him to shut up. He muttered a fine before telling you to hurry up as he ended the call.

Five minutes later, you walk out of the airport and immediately spotted Chuuya sitting on his motorcycle. As if sensing your presence, he looks towards your way and you see him visibly exhale.

"Finally!" He threw his hands up as he approached you.

"Aww. Did you miss me that much, Chuuya?" You grin at him.

He only looks to the side as he grabs your bags and turns back around.

"Come on, we'll be late for that dinner reservation," He simply says.

"Hey- Wait!" You run up to him and he looks back at you.

"Hurry up, slowpoke." He sticks out his tongue at you.

But then his eyes widen, surprised, as you wrap your arms around him and bury your head on his chest. "I missed you, Chuuya."

He felt himself blush and it took him five more seconds before he raises his free hand to pat your head softly.

"Welcome home, Y/N," He says as he leans down to kiss the top of your head. "You have no idea how much I missed you."

➳ Akutagawa Ryūnosuke

He knew you were coming home today. He knew what time you would land and how long it would take for you to grab your luggage and exit the airport. He knew all this but he didn't have the time to pick you up.

He was caught up with a number of work to do and tons of people to clean up

He decided to just text you with a: Can't come to the airport right now. Caught up with work.

You expected this but you were still slightly disappointed. You've been gone for almost 3 weeks but your boyfriend didn't seem to miss you that much.

But then again, you knew Akutagawa better than anyone else and you just know he feels bad deep down inside for not being able to come meet you at the airport.

And that's exactly true. Akutagawa was in a really bad mood the whole day that he finished his jobs in record time, letting Rashōmon kill everyone in sight oops

By the time he finished his last job, you were already preparing dinner at your shared apartment.

Akutagawa finally arrived home, a little grumpier than usual, and accidentally banged the door close.

"Aku?" You peeked your head from the kitchen, startled by the loud noise.

"Oh. Hey, Y/N." He acknowledges you for a second before making his way towards the bedroom.

You slightly frown at his lack of enthusiasm but shake it off. He was always like this anyway.

You return to cutting vegetables and boiling water for Akutagawa's tea.

Then you hear light shuffling behind you. But before you could turn around, you felt slim arms wrap around your waist and you jump in surprise.

"Aku?" You slightly turn your body. "Is everything alright?"

He grunts in response.

"Tough day?"

He shakes his head. "Sorry I wasn't able to pick you up earlier." His voice was muffled but you heard him loud and clear.

"That's fine. I had no trouble getting home by myself." You smile.

Akutagawa's arms only wrap around you tighter. "I'm honestly glad you're back in one piece. Welcome home, Y/N."

You chuckle at that. "It's good to be home." You leaned further into his embrace and closed your eyes. "I really missed you."

"I missed you too," He whispered as he turns his head to kiss you on the cheek.

Ok I made Akutagawa a looot softer but I rlly think he has a soft spot for his s/o

[biillyhargroves]

sooo a billy request bc you do him so damn well / he’s sick & rlly wants to be taken care of so so all he does is complain ( yk he’s a ‘tough boy’) but then secretly melts at all the attention? ❤️❤️

cough syrup(fic requests open)

Billy Hargrove is good at a lot of things; being sick is not one of them.

Not that anyone is particularly good at being ill. Some people simply handle it better than others, and Billy tends not to handle it at all. Doctors’ recommendations- rest and fluids, medication -tend to fall by the wayside. Instead, he prefers to act as though he is not sick at all. The logic, of course, is that if he pretends he is well, his body will catch up. In seventeen years, he has yet to succeed, but this does not stop him from trying. And so, when he wakes up with sinus pain and a sore throat, he promptly ignores it. 

He downs the half-finished cup of cold coffee his father left abandoned on the kitchen table. He searches for the history book he’s not even sure he brought home. He shouts at Max to, “Hurry your ass up or I’m leaving without you!” He revs the engine like he’s really going to do it, and when Max does get in the car he says, “You’re explaining if we’re late.”

“What the hell’s wrong with your voice?”

Billy clears his throat and says, “Nothing.”

Max doesn’t believe him, but she doesn’t press the matter. She is quiet for the whole drive, but when Billy pulls up outside of Hawkins Middle School, she lingers in the car. Billy can feel her gaze on him, and he raises his eyebrow at her. 

“Get out,” Billy says, words strained as he stifles a cough. Max looks like she’s going to say something, and Billy almost hopes she does- almost wants her to ask if he’s okay, almost wants her to figure out what’s really wrong -almost. But she doesn’t. She throws open the door and drops her skateboard onto the ground. 

The day drags at a glacial pace. The longer it lasts, the worse Billy feels. He tries to brush it off. He keeps up his act as long as he can, stealing away private moments to collect himself when he thinks the mask is about to fall. On one such occasion he stumbles out of a bathroom stall to find Steve there, hands on his hips, waiting.

“The fuck do you want?” Billy grumbles. He doesn’t mean to be harsh and he hopes that Steve knows this. They have an agreement, after all. Their classmates think they hate each other, and that is the safest assumption for anyone to have. Steve opens his arms to reveal the empty room around them. 

“Cut the shit,” he says. “What’s the matter with you?”

“Nothing,” Billy says. He shoves past Steve and turns on a faucet. The cold water sends a shudder down his spine. He grits his teeth, pumps soap into his palm, watches the suds rise up beneath the rush of water.

“Tell your face,” Steve says. Billy takes a brief look in the mirror. There are deep circles under his eyes (he’d been telling people he’d had a shitty night’s sleep, which wasn’t entirely a lie); he even thinks he sees some swelling there, a puffiness that hadn’t been there this morning. Billy grabs a paper towel, dries his hands, almost uses it to blow his nose and then remembers that he’s not supposed to be sick. He tosses the towel in the waste bin. “Oh, come on,” Steve says.

“Shut up,” says Billy.

“It’s just us,” Steve says. “You can say it.”

“Say what?” Billy demands. 

“That you’re sick,” says Steve. 

“I’m not-”

“Don’t,” Steve says. “You promised you wouldn’t lie to me.”

“That was about-”

“Doesn’t matter,” Steve says.

“You’re a fucking dick, Harrington, you know that?”

“And you look like death warmed over,” Steve says. Billy hangs his head. He looks cornered, and Steve sags his shoulders, almost feeling bad. “We still on for tonight?” he asks, and he can see Billy’s relief at the change in subject.

“Yeah,” Billy says. “I just gotta wait for my dad to leave.”

“Okay,” Steve says. He stands there a moment too long, watching Billy carefully. Then he says, “Tonight.” 

Of course, by the time tonight rolls around Billy feels like death warmed over, re-frozen, and thawed out again. He aches all over and his throat is on fire. He does not have his usual quick wit when he picks Max up after school. There is none of their usual bickering, and though Max won’t stop staring at him, the only thing she asks is, “Are you seeing Steve tonight?”

“What’s it matter to you?” Billy grumbles, voice so low Max almost doesn’t hear him.

“It doesn’t,” Max says.

“Then why’d you ask?” He sounds like he’s been gargling with rocks and he surpasses a cough at the end of every sentence he speaks.

“You can drop me off at Mike’s,” she says. “If you want to just go straight to Steve’s. I’ll tell Neil I stayed for AV club.”

“And why would you do that?” Billy asks.

“Because you’re sick and Neil’s not gonna do jack shit about it,” Max says. “But Steve will.”

“I’m not sick,” Billy says.

“Well, you can drop me off at Mike’s anyway,” Max says. She is finding her footing on what she hopes is the path of least resistance and, luckily for her, Billy doesn’t have the energy to argue. He swings a right abruptly, circles back toward the school, makes his way to Wheeler house. When he asks Max when he’s supposed to pick her up, she says, “Just stay at Steve’s. I’ll get a ride with Will.”

“Max, I can-”

“Ask Steve for NyQuil or something. Sleep off whatever you don’t think you have.”

“You’re not my fucking mother,” Billy says.

“We’re family, right? We’re supposed to look out for each other?”

“Save the speech.”

“You’ll stay at Steve’s?”

“If it’ll make you shut up.”

“It will,” Max says, so Billy agrees. When he arrives at Steve’s house, Steve is surprised to see him so early. Billy lets himself in the back door out of habit. Even when there are no parents home, sneaking is second nature. Steve startles when he hears Billy coming in through the kitchen.

“Christ, man,” he breathes. “Make a noise.”

“Sorry,” Billy mumbles. He furrows his brow when he spots an array of pill bottles lined up on the countertop. There are red and white cans of Campbell’s soup, too, and a box of Lipton’s teabags. “The hell’s all this?”

“For you,” Steve shrugs. “Since you’re obviously not taking care of yourself.”

“Steve, I’m-”

“Don’t say fine,” Steve says. “Don’t say not sick. Actually, don’t say anything. Go sit down. I pulled some blankets out for you. They’re on the couch. I was gonna stop by the video store, but you can just pick from what we have. My dad actually has decent taste for such a stuck-up son of a bitch.”

“Why-”

“Because I care about you, dickhead. That’s why.”

Billy won’t pretend this doesn’t touch him, insult and all. He can’t say that this doesn’t like the attention. He also can’t say the idea of melting into the Harringtons’ overstuffed couch doesn’t sound like everything he’s secretly wanted all day. He approaches Steve from behind, arms snaking around Steve’s middle as Steve rifles through the open cabinet in front of him.

“Hey,” Steve says softly, one hand coming down to rest on top of Billy’s. “You gonna tell me what’s wrong?” he asks. Billy rests his head in the curve of Steve’s neck and Steve says, “You feel warm.”

“My head is killing me,” Billy admits. “My throat’s killing me.”

“You wanna take something?” Steve asks, and Billy shrugs. “Go lay down.” 

Steve squeezes Billy’s hand and Billy releases him. Steve fishes a bag of cough drops out of the cabinet and shakes a few into Billy’s palm before Billy retreats into the living room. Steve makes him tea, pours him cough syrup, makes two trips to carry in both water and whatever orange juice they had leftover in the carton in the fridge. By the time he finally settles down beside Billy, Billy is cocooned in the nest of blankets Steve had laid out for him. Steve gets some medicine into him: Robatussin and some Ibuprofen. He sits down beside Billy and, when Billy leans again him, he gently guides Billy to lay down. Billy settles his head in Steve’s lap and allows Steve to brush back his hair. 

“You okay?” Steve asks him, though Billy is twilighting somewhere between awake and asleep and he’s entirely sure if Billy can hear him. 

“Everything hurts,” Billy mumbles.

“Drama queen,” Steve teases, but he slips his hand to Billy’s shoulders and gently massages the coiled muscles there. 

“Shut up,” Billy quips. He sounds sleepy, and Steve softly shushes him. He rubs Billy’s back, and Billy slowly drifts off. As he does, a fleeting thought floats through his mind: maybe, just maybe, this is better than toughing shit out. 

[whirlybirbs]

i’m begging u .. can u write a rlly fluffy blurb about bee’s human getting injured and worried!bee is all over her

UNLAWFUL ARREST ;

summary: charlie, memo and you accidentally intercept a distress call.enter barricade & frenzy. it’s fight night at the junkyard. frenzy has rabies.pairing: bumblebee x human!readerrating: t for canon-typical-violence & some swearing!a/n: this was very fun to write bc i love ‘cade and i love ‘bee and i love one bad-ass reader with one (1) good wrench. set in the 2018 bumblebee movieverse!

Shit.

Charlie had woken you up out of a dead sleep, rattling your window frame with rocks much larger than pebbles to indicate the urgency -- sure enough, her and Memo were saddled up on her bike. 

Leaning out the window, you hush them both.

“What?” you whisper-yell, “Shh, stop yelling, you idiots --”

“The junkyard!” Charlie finally gets out, eyes wild, “Something’s going on. Something bad. We need to help them.”

Sector 7? The Decepticons? 

The blood drains from your face. You don’t even respond, just begin to tear your room apart in a desperate attempt to throw on a sweater and jeans and tuck the long-distance Sonic Ranger radio into your back pocket  -- your Adidas beat down the stairs as you burst through the door, meeting Charlie and Memo half-way down the cul-de-sac. You’re running, hair wild and sleep forgotten. 

“How’d you know?” you ask, lungs burning as the three of you beat the tarmac in the direction of Old Maccadam’s Junkyard. Charlie’s electric bike has a lot on you, peddling like a bat out of hell, “Is ‘Bee okay?”

“We got a call on the radio -- sounded like a distress signal -- a lot of yelling --”

You move, tugging the walkie talkie from your jeans and clicking on the signal. There’s a lot of static, and then you press the receiver.

“’Musketeers to base, I repeat, Musketeers to base.”

Nothing. Just endless static.

“What the hell?”

“I know,” Charlie says, “Sideswipe always has the frequency on. No one’s responding.”

Suddenly, headlights flood over the three of you. 

“Charlie --”

“Shit.”

You turn, still peddling, spotting the paint-job of s Dodge Diplomat behind you. 

“Is that Prowl?” you ask, confusion flooding your voice as your eyes bounce to Charlie next to you. She blinks, turning to look. 

Memo, upon hearing the name of the Autobot Second-in-Command, brightens visibly and begins waving his arms wildly. “Prowl! Hey! It’s -- it’s us! Your friends! You know --”

Suddenly, the police cruiser surges forward and it’s lights paint the night sky red and purple.

The Decepticon insignia on the hood sneers in your face. 

“Not Prowl!” Memo screeches, “So not Prowl! Bad guy! That’s a bad guy!”

“Shit!”

You both turn fast, dipping off the road and into the rocky path towards the run-down scrap-yard turned Autobot base in attempt to shake the sudden predator who’s tailing you too close for comfort.

The sand and rocks and cacti don’t do much to dissuade Barricade, though. He’s trudged through worse to track down Autobot filth. In this center console, Frenzy vibrates -- his senseless chatter seems to grow as nimble metallic servos tune his own radio to Judas Priest.

“BREAKING THE LAW, BREAKING LAW!”

Barricade doesn’t mind this Earth music too much.

The three of you hit the Junkyard’s wall fast, breaking in opposite directions along the fence. You break hard, kicking up sand and peddling as fast as you can along the western side of the scrapyard.

“‘Bee! Optimus!” you screech, “For fuck’s sake, Sunny! Anyone!”

The growl of the engine behind you startles a scream from your throat.

You cut the handlebars fast, turning into the back-end of the scrap yard and hauling your bike over the fence as fast as you can. Slipping through the gaps in the chain-link, where it’s curled and rusted, you take off on foot and are fast to duck into the shadows of the scrapyard’s rusted and gutted cars. 

At first, Barricade rolls by.

You look around wildly, wondering where the hell they all were. 

They were twenty-foot tall alien robots. They weren’t hard to misplace. 

Suddenly, the large flood lights fixed high above the Junkyard crank on -- and Barricade spies you duck fast beneath a bottomed-out Buick. From your spot, you see Charlie and Memo climbing the cat-walk, desperate to get a sight on the Autobots normally here. 

The yard is silent. 

For a second.

And then, Barricade transforms.

You reach for the radio, shaky hands tuning the dial. You whisper desperately.

“Musketeers to Car Show, we’ve got a problem here! So, I dunno, return to base!”

He seethes, peeling away the fence and taking his time to stroll through the Junkyard. “So this is what they call home now.”

Charlie and Memo freeze, gripping one another tightly. 

Barricade seems to ignore the reaction, seems to ignore them both completely. He isn’t interested in fleshlings -- he’s interested in Optimus. And that fragging scout of his. 

“Where are they?” Barricade asks casually, “Where are the Autobots?”

Red optics sweep around, no doubt trying to get a read on the absent energon signals. Even still, the three of you are silent. 

A ped crushes the car next to you like a tin-can and you squeak. 

“Frenzy,” Barricade rumbles, “Handle the humans. Pick their bones.”

“Pick our bones --?!”

“Shit!”

The compartment in his chest bursts open, revealing the three-foot tall death mini-con hankering from a snack. 

You scream then, launching yourself over the Buick and throwing the walkie talkie as hard as you can. It nails Frenzy straight between the optics, giving you enough time to book it to the main storage space -- but, Frenzy is hot on your heels with sharp denta snapping at your knees. You trip, landing hard on the concrete as Frenzy’s servos dig into your ankles. You scream, landing a hard kick that sends the mini-bots servos offline for a second. 

You bound up the catwalk, just in time to see Bumblebee make his entrance. 

Sometimes you forget he’s a soldier -- he’s strong and fast and lands lightning punches that nearly cripple the Decepticon in a seconds time. His battle-mask is up and ready, blue optics narrowed in an angry determination. 

With Barricade on the ground, those blue optics connect with your gaze. He seems to go soft for a moment, waving slowly. You laugh -- dirt covered face cracking into a grin. 

You’re enthralled, completely and totally, but the current Decepticon threat ruins the moment. Barricade pulls the scout down by his door-wings just as Frenzy chatters out a sharp cackle and continues his hungry pursuit of you.

“Get off of me, you gear shift!” you holler, hands winding into the spaces in his plating as you toss the bot to the catwalk stairs. The whole thing rattles and Charlie, up above, shouts your name.

“Catch!”

A 12″ wrench.

Or, in this case, a blunt-force weapon. 

You swing down hard and fast, catching the minibot as it rolls away and shrieks. 

Suddenly, the junkyard is flooded with more Autobots -- Prowl is first through the gates, landing a hard hit on Barricade as Bee staggers back from a blow to the processor. Optimus is next, full of grace and power as he draws his gun and nails Barricade’s shoulder amidst the scuffle. 

Frenzy, now corned by the three of you, has set it’s sights back on your ankles -- he clings, scaling the skin there and landing a harsh bite on your thigh. 

“Son of a bitch!” 

“FRENZY! RETREAT!”

You unceremoniously throw the minicon off you, hammering home with the 12″ wrench. It’s barbaric and the move even has Ironhide wincing as the small Decepticon dashes from the premise and follows the taillights of the Dodge Diplomat into the night. 

You huff, hands dropping to your knees.

“Jesus.”

Charlie, behind you, has a hand wound in Memo’s shirt. They both look shaken, albeit safe. Silence settles in the junkyard. Along the comms, Ooptimus is barking out orders. You can tell by the way his optics move.

‘Bee is by your side in a second’s time, rolling onto his knees and eyeing you with a wide and worried look. He coos, offering a gentle prod. Blood is running down your leg, ruining your jeans and splattering on your Adidas. 

“Bad dog -- zzrt -- he’ll bite ya! Woof!”

And then you laugh.

And then Charlie does. And Memo, too. 

And Prowl looks at you three like you’ve shorted out. 

“I’m gunna need,” you say between breaths, “A tetanus shot. He bit me. That fuckin’ thing bit me. It bit me.”

‘Bee whirs again, sounding sick with worry.

Ratchet steps in then, gesturing the rest of the crew to get to work at cleaning up the mess the scuffle made. He kneels, servos gentle as he narrows his optics and blinks at the wound.

“Let me clean his up,” he says slowly, “You three are lucky we came when we did.”

“We tried calling,” you mutter, “But no one was home.”

“We were trying to locate Barricade. He’d broadcast-ed a distress signal when he landed. Though, it seems our Musketeers found him before we did.”

Ratchet transforms, opening the back doors of his alt. mode. You crawl in, accepting the ride to the main hangar. ‘Bee follows close behind, the rush in his systems starting to quiet and cool. Right now, you’re the main focus of his worries -- he’ll rip Frenzy to shreds later. 

“Pants off.”

Ratchet says it so curtly, Charlie and Memo take it as their cue to leave -- so they make their way to Optimus leaving you and ‘Bee and Ratchet in the main hangar. You grumble softly at the command, rolling your eyes slightly and tugging at your belt buckle.

“Could at least take me to dinner first.”

‘Bee chirps angrily from his spot behind Ratchet. 

“Bumblebee,” he sighs, “I need to clean the wounds. I have no intent on seducing your mate.”

Your eyes widen. You blink. ‘Bee has worked himself into a flurry at that, waving wildly and buzzing more like a wasp than anything.

“What did you just call me?!”

“Will you sit?”

You do as your told, wiggling your pants off and hissing softly at the sting. There’s a lot of blood -- the gashes are deep, too. Just seeing them makes your face run cold. Settling on the edge of the bench, Ratchet deploys his holoavatar.

Older, with white hair and a kind face. His hands are gentle. ‘Bee watches the whole way. 

You try to distract yourself. 

“See ‘Bee? Nothing more than a scratch. I’m fine.”

“These are deep wounds,” Ratchet counters. You whack the shoulder of his holoform. It fizzles out at the rough contact. He yelps. “I am just being honest!”

“Yeah, well,” you chirp, “Stop being a good doctor and tell me I’ll be fine.”

“You will be fine,” he mutters, “If I can ensure you don’t get any Cybertronian-prone bacterial infections.”

‘Bee nearly wallops Ratchet himself.

“Great,” you breath, “Nice. Here I am, no pants on in the middle of the base, bleeding, and that little Decepti-freak might have given me robo-rabies.”

‘Bee drives you home that night. By the time you make it in, the sun is starting to creep up along the horizon. You crawl out of the cab, moving to tug the garage door up. You’d borrowed a pair of shorts from Charlie -- she’d had some in the basket of her bike -- and Ratchet had done a nice job at patching you up.

The bandages are tight.

‘Bee rolls into the garage. You sigh, patting his hood. He transforms slowly.

“Long night, huh, buddy?”

An affirmative coo.

“You were a bad-ass out there, though. You handed Barricade his aft.”

“Not -- zzRt -- as cool as you!” ‘Bee’s gaze is heavy though. He whines a bit, nudging his face into your hands and nearly purring at the contact, “Glad -- srt -- you’re safe with me.”

You hum, enjoying the attention. A delicate servo has secured itself to your back, nudging you close to his chest. You can feel his spark vibrate under the plating there. Two hands splay across the glossy paint there. Bumblebee coos -- it’s happy and content, not full of worry like it had been earlier. 

For a while, you two settle in like that. You crawl into his lap, curled up around a big servo. His optics dim, going from a vibrant blue to a soft, pale glow. 

But, after a moment, you break the silence.

“‘Bee?”

His antennae twitch.

“Why did Ratchet call me your ‘mate’?”

Shit.

[arcticmaggie]

Donut Shop

Y/N is embarrassing but Harry doesn’t mind it.

Word Count: 3.3k

Warnings: None?? Just a bunch of second hand embarrassment. Also Harry is kinda cocky in this? But still a sweetheart deep down.

A/N:  Wow hi this is my first fic I’ve ever written so it’s pretty bad ngl!!! But I’d rlly appreciate feedback even if its harsh. love me some truthful jabs to improve my work!! THERE WILL BE MORE BUT MY BRAIN IS A MESS AND I TAKE A WHILE TO WRITE EVERYTHING DOWN HOW I WANT IT TO BE

-

Y/N had never really been much of a delusional fan of sorts. The kind of fan that falls in love with an artist and becomes obsessed with the idea of one day bumping into them on the street or in a small town cafe and hitting it off right away. Of course, she doesn’t blame those other teens for wanting some kind of fairy tale in a usual monotone life. And she still has her fair share of crying over tour announcements when her favorite artist will be in town. But growing up as a teen listening to young adults with celebrity girlfriends, the idea of meeting her idol and promptly falling in love afterward had never become the slightest bit realistic.

Until she quite literally bumped into Harry Styles in a small town donut shop and dropped her freshly warmed up ham and cheese on the floor.

She would have absolutely made a scene for the spill─just that morning, she had woken up in a hurry to work after she slept through her alarm, spilled half her coffee all over the kitchen floor, saw a spider in her bathroom (and completely freaked out), and ran around her studio apartment trying to find the car keys in her hands; just to be sent a text, as she was 10 minutes away from work, stating that Mikey would be taking over her shift today. So a stranger bumping into her and making her drop her ham and cheese sandwich (ham-cheesy as she likes to call it) would have triggered her inner beast if it wasn’t for her eyes to flicker up a millisecond before she opens her mouth and lock on to Harry.

“Oh shit─ Darling, I swear this was all m’ fault, I should ‘ave watched where I was going,” he spills out as he extends an arm out to her shoulder to steady himself, looking down at her sandwich and not at all noticing her dumbstruck expression. Good thing, too, because although she doesn’t compose herself completely by the time he looks up, she does manage to close her gaping mouth and only stare with wide and slightly teary eyes. With this look on her face, Harry instinctively knows that he would not get the bite from her. He doesn’t mean to be egotistical but seeing that face enough times has lead him to be aware of when he can get away with mistakes.

One of the wonderfully various perks of being a well-known and well-respected young artist throughout the world is the very limited acts of aggression towards him, although sometimes the more devoted of fans will use aggression to express their actual love for him, which he can still appreciate. Mostly, it’s just boys/men who never learned to respect how much more attention One Direction got from their girlfriends than they themselves that feel the need to express their negative feelings towards him when it’s appropriate.

So as he looks up and is welcomed with a starstruck expression, he couldn’t help but break out into a lopsided grin─one that he knows drive girls crazy─and runs a hand through his hair, giving a quick glance over to the menu above the cashier’s head (who was watching this entire thing with cautious eyes; he’d seen the agitated look on the young girl’s face when she first walked in and knew there was a chance a fight could break out in any moment) and began to speak again. “Okay, ‘ave about twelve dollars left, check out the menu and ‘ave at it. My form of apology.”

Y/N knew she was embarrassing herself with every second that went by, so she tries to give a small smile (as big as an elephant) and let out a small laugh (the giggle of a hyena from southern California). She tucks her hair behind both ears and quickly crouches down to pick up the ham-cheesy, a quarter of it saved by the napkins the cashier had wrapped around it when he handed it to her.

“No, it’s um─it’s okay, no worries. I’ve eaten worse,” she rushes out as she waves her sandwich around frantically. She realizes how weird this looks and how she just implied she eats dirty food and lowers her hand down, avoiding eye contact and rolling her lips into her mouth so as to physically stop her from creating more damage.

Harry stares down in amusement, and lets an awkward two seconds pass by before reiterating, “Order something.”

Y/N immediately nods her head in quick agreement and quickly walks over to the trash can to throw the precious ham and cheese away─which in all honesty, she would have no problem eating because the five second rule still applied in her world and she only had so much money to actually spend on food and not waste it all on rent and bills. She then walks back over to the cashier, without making any eye contact with Harry at all, and taps her nails against the counter.

“Can I have another warmed up ham and cheese sandwich please?” The cashier nods and enters the price into the cash register, looking up at Harry as he begins to utter out the price, but is stopped as Y/N pipes up again with a small stammer in her voice, “A-And a medium iced coffee, with two sugars and 2 creams.”

She doesn’t know why she ordered a coffee when she has her 24 oz Thermo waiting for her in the car, but after hearing Harry snort shortly after as the cashier goes back and adds the extra 4 dollars and accepts the updated amount of money from Harry, she internally pats herself on the back for doing it.

The cashier begins to patch up her order behind the counter but Y/N keeps herself at the counter, staring down at the marble design and continues to tap her nails against it to the rhythm of the Charlie Puth song playing softly in the shop. She hears Harry take a couple sips from his own order and she can't help but take a quick glance, only to be met with a very amused face already staring back at her. He has the same boyish grin planted on his lips as before and she loves it and hates it because that means she was definitely making a fool out of herself.

Might as well make it worse.

“What? You said I could ‘have at it,’ and I am.” This came out a little harsher and less playfully as she wanted it to and she cringes away from him a bit to prepare herself for whatever harsh remark he bites back with. But he grins back at her and nods.

“That's right, I did. Lovely tha’ you're taking advantage of it.” This provokes a small blush to creep up her neck and lower cheeks and she begins to mutter out an apology for being so rude but is cut off as he quickly turns her back to her and takes out his phone to scroll through it mindlessly as he's facing the corner of the cafe. It shocks her and she feels her heart break.

She feels the tears prick up in her eyes again (she’s so emotional, honestly, you would think he just spit in her eye with her reaction) and scolds herself for making him not interested enough to literally turn his back to her, but her inward scolding is interrupted when someone clears their throat behind her. She whips around and is greeted with a raised eyebrow of a girl waiting for her to step aside so she can order and Y/N turns back around to see the cashier also looking at her to move so he can charge the girl. The blush on her cheeks becomes a bit more prominent as she quickly moves to the side and stares down at the donuts on display as she waits for her order.

Y/N looks back over to Harry and sees how he is crouching a bit down in the sense that he was trying to make himself smaller and invisible to the girl, and continues yet again to scold herself but for different reasons; because now she gets it. He wasn’t turning his back to her, he was turning his back to the new customer─and looking back at her, she understands exactly why. Her shirt reads “ON THE LOOSE” and the phone in her hand has an ILLUMINATE case. So chances are she is well aware of who Harry is.

The cashier walks over to Y/N after he’s done accepting the girl’s money with the iced coffee and sandwich in hand and passes it over the glass display. She takes both and thanks him quietly, but she stays put in her spot. She knows Harry is not going to risk turning around and walking out while the teenage girl is still in the shop, but she herself literally has no purpose to stay put. She’s got 24 ounces of hot coffee waiting for her in the car before she can even think about drinking the iced version in her hand and she also very stupidly left her phone charging in the car (she also woke up that morning to her phone on 7%) so there’s no point to drag her presence out in this place. But she still sticks around as she pretends to struggle with getting a couple napkins from the dispenser to wrap them around her drink while watching the girl take the bag of donut holes she bought. She turns to Y/N with a less than amused look on her face.

“It’s really not that hard to get a napkin out.”

How is it possible for Y/N to get even redder in the face than before?

“I know right! I’m really─really not in my element, you know? Today..” She trails off as she stops pretending to struggle and easily gets out 5 napkins. She looks at them sheepishly before offering them all to the girl who rolls her eyes, snatches them from her, and exits the store. Y/N watches her leave without looking back and exhales very deeply, with relief that she didn’t actually feel the wrath of a teenage girl (her female classmates in high school really helped her realize how awful some girls could be to others). Keeping her body in the same position to watch the girl leave, she reaches behind her to the dispenser and grabs a single napkin─this time only one and with ease─while gulping down the frog in her throat and clearing her voice.

“She’s um─the girl’s gone,” she croaks out, Harry turning around at the statement and watches along with her as the girl enters the passenger side of a car and drives off.

“Y’know, if it weren’t for y’a bein’ a proper knob, she probably would’a saw me.”

This makes Y/N whip her head around to gape at him and his words.

“A proper knob?”

His grin keeps getting bigger and bigger.

“Yeh, a proper knob. Was so obvious you were trying to pull attention away from me.” He looks at her with a look that screamed you were not sneaky. Y/N didn't expect him to be so blunt and even a bit offensive, and the way he keeps grinning at her makes her blood boil as if he wasn't the man she's been dreaming about for years.

“Well if you weren't so god damn obvious with trying to hide, maybe I wouldn't have had to step in.” Really, this has been such an off day for her. Who is she, mouthing off to him instead of apologizing and asking for an autograph or a follow on twitter like any other normal fan encounter?

She would think Harry would have had enough of her attitude towards him. He's probably used to all the other girls dropping to their knees, and although she's still 4 years younger than him, she finds it probable that he would classify her as one of those girls. If it weren't for her big mouth ruining that.

But despite her inner argument with herself, Harry is absolutely enjoying this morning. He woke up in his hotel room with no alarm, no meeting in tow, or no call to rehearsal (at least not until noon), just himself and the quiet. He woke up in such a good mood that he decided not to go to the private gym a couple floors down, to give himself a cheat day and rest up before the final show of the tour (which he knew was going to be very exhausting both physically and emotionally). He even went out of his way to drive around the city where he was staying at and made a quick detour to a small donut shop that he saw vacant that also sold organic smoothies. And as he enjoyed his smoothie at one of the small tables inside, a girl walked in with very heavy steps. 

Of course, that’s really all he took note of since he tried to turn his head away from her direction as to not make eye contact if she were to turn around and spot him and freak out. It’s not like he doesn’t enjoy his fan interactions, he just would rather not have an entire group of teenage girls track him down from just one picture posted on Twitter.

He waits for her to finish up with her order and head back out to relax a bit but in the next 3 minutes, he never hears the door jingle. He heard her order a ham and cheese sandwich and he figured those were ready to eat just like the rest of the donuts and bread out on display but as he subtly turns his head around to take a peak, he still sees her waiting by the counter with no sandwich in sight. He huffs out a short breath but isn’t bothered by it. She looks like a college student and with the way she’s folding her arms in front of her chest and there’s no body movement, he figured she’s definitely not in the mood to strike up a conversation with anyone and her hormones have settled down a bit from her presumed age so she won’t get worked up if she actually recognizes him (that is, if she even knows who he is; but come on, who doesn’t).

So he relaxes a bit in his seat and keeps his body open, and eventually, he does hear the cashier say “Here you go,” and the girl responds with a small thank you, accompanied with the sound of footsteps and her silhouette moving towards the door in Harry’s peripheral vision. When she’s halfway through the path, he gets up and heads to the counter to grab a straw and lid for the road; he didn’t want another person to walk in and maybe risk another possible encounter so he figured he should leave right after her.

He’s right on her tracks too as he walks behind her and is slightly amused but mostly relieved that she hasn’t felt his presence behind him. But then she suddenly turns around with “Napkins!” coming out of under her breath and boom─her food is on the ground, his hand is on her shoulder, an apology spills out of his mouth, and he thinks to himself, just keep your cool and treat her like a normal person. But then he sees her with eyes wide open with shock and an actually really cute face now that he’s seen her up close and he realizes: he could have fun with this.

So here they are, after Harry, unfortunately, had to turn his back on the pretty girl in front of him because of the other younger girl that walked in who would have absolutely caused a scene; he was grateful that the sandwich girl didn’t say anything about it and picked up on the situation at hand enough to distract the other girl from him, but if anything, this invited Harry to be more playful and cheeky with this chick as she inadvertently made his interest in her peek. Even more so now that she bit back with a slightly bitter attitude to his comment.

 He loves kindness, he really does, whether it be him treating others with kindness or everyone else treating each other with kindness, but he can always appreciate it when someone can act like he’s not some heavenly figure, and for a change, this girl is doing that.

“Y’know what? Y’a got me there. Thank you for saving the day, m’lady.”

This provokes the everlasting tomato color on Y/N’s face to multiply, her minute outburst of anger quickly dying down and switching back to her flustered state of shock and enamor. Her breath hitches as she’s stumped with giving a response and staring into his devilish eyes really isn’t helping. He really managed to make himself seem like a dick for a moment there, but his smirk had changed to a genuine smile and his eyes have gone from asshole to sweetheart. For eight years she has been following this man, yet this is the very first time she has ever seen this side of him. She really doesn’t understand how she isn’t having an aneurysm from this.

But she does go back to her state of staring blankly at him with a slightly open mouth and she watches him whip out his phone once more and answer a text he receives just then. Even watches him give her a small salute and proceed to the door to leave before finally shouting out on impulse once she realizes this is literally the first and last time she will have ever talked to him face to face.

“I’m going to see you tonight!”

Harry turns around with his arm still pushing the door open, his eyebrows quickly furrowing from the comment. The left side of his lip quirks up into a half smirk after he processes what she just exclaimed and one of his furrowed eyebrows flicks up.

“Is that a threat?”

“What─No! I mean─” Y/N heart starts to pound even harder (seriously, how has she not gone into cardiac arrest from this morning alone?) and she huffs out as she tries to jumble her words around to explain further. “I mean, I’m going to your concert tonight. The last show at the Forum, right? The last show, of the tour.”

Now, his other eyebrow shoots up. “Oh. Well then, let’s hope I see you as well.” And with that, he turns back around and heads off.

All that’s heard in the donut shop after the door closes is the buzz of the air conditioner and Y/N’s heart pounding. She stands there like an idiot, trying to truly process what had just happened. She had just run into Harry Styles, had him pay for her breakfast, saved him from a possibly crazy fan, and shared fiery banter with each other. And later tonight she’s going to witness his presence again along with his sweet voice and now questionable sweet character (okay there’s no doubt he’s the sweetest person alive, but there is a doubt that that’s the only persona he holds with everybody).

Y/N closes her eyes and inhales and exhales very deeply before opening her eyes again and glances back towards the cashier, still looking at her with concern in his eyes like as if she’s going to explode. You have no idea, she telepathically tells him with her eyes. With that, she finally retreats to the exit, hearing the doorbell jingle as she steps out and treads to her car, her mind scrambling through her memory to hold onto one of the most terrifying yet spectacular encounters she’s ever had. And with that thought, new ones came swarming in about what was to come with tonight’s concert and the very slight chance that perhaps maybe, Harry’s statement might hold true and they might see each other again.

Her once clear mindset of never believing in fairy tales or the idea of meeting her idol has been swept away and replaced with nothing but that very idea of another encounter and maybe even more.

Y/N and heart are both totally fucked.

[eddiespagheds]

can you please do “i don’t want to hear your excuses anymore” and “how fucking dare you” for the angst prompt thing?? i love your writing and i’ve been craving some good reddie angst. tysm!

oKAy so 1. THANK YOU IM SO GLAD YOU ENJOY MY WRITING💞💞 2. i am SO SO sorry that this has taken so long to come out i just wanted it to be really goOD!! this is sad as shit and i’m so sorry about that, but like aNgSt ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i don’t have a title for this and i rlly rlly hope you like it !!! (its 1560 words) also also big thanks to loml dipstopher for readin through it for me!! @ass-gardiann

————————

The summer of ‘84 is when it all seemed to go wrong for Eddie Kaspbrak. He had come out as gay, and told his best friend, Richie Tozier, that he was in love with him. The Losers were very accepting of him, and a few others in the group have even come out at gay or bi since then, but Richie (being the bisexual disaster he is lmao) didn’t talk to Eddie for an entire week after he told Richie about his feelings, and things haven’t been the same between the two since then.

That was about two years ago, and more than just Eddie and Richie’s relationship has changed since then. Eddie became a star runner on the varsity track team, and he has only remained friends with Mike and Ben because they were also on the track and field team. He hadn’t spoken to the rest of the Losers since he became “popular”, only sending them awkward waves as he walked down the hallway with his girlfriend Great Bowie. Yes, the same Greta that used to make fun of Eddie and would call him a stupid fairy.

Now, he didn’t lie to the Losers when he came out at 15 years old, quite the opposite actually, he was lying about his sexuality now in fear of the response that he’d get from those around him, that they would do what Richie did.

It wasn’t that Eddie didn’t miss the Losers, and that was obvious because of how often he asked Mike and Ben how they were doing. The rest of the Losers missed Eddie just as much as he missed them, but they all knew that Richie would have to be the one to solve the problem. Both boys seemed to be absolute disasters without the other. Richies bad smoking habit only got worse, and Eddie’s anxiety worsened. No matter how upset they were they both knew, deep down that they needed each other to feel complete.

It was a cold day in Derry, and it was only getting colder as sundown approached. Eddie had stayed late after track practice, so he could get a few more laps in. Running cane so natural to Eddie that he never had to think about what he was doing, so he normally thought about whatever was stressing him out which was usually Richie, school, his mom, or all three. Today he was thinking about how Greta had broken up with him for some cooler guy that was on the football team, and Richie because Ben had told him this funny story about how the taller boy fell while attempting to learn a skateboard trick. He smiled, thinking about the grin that Richie probably had plastered on his face after the fall, when he stepped in a rock that he hadn’t noticed and tumbled to the round.

“Aghh” He yelled out in pain. He was sure that he had sprained his ankle. He couldn’t just sit there on the grumpy track, so he picked himself up and began limping to the empty locker room to collect his things, whimpering every few steps as he walked out of the building and begun making his way towards his house when he heard a voice he would never forget.

“Eds?”

The annoyingly wonderful nickname that he hadn’t heard in what felt like forever, and hearing it now made his heart break more than he expected. He froze hoping that if he just ignored it, Richie would go away, but he knew that wouldn’t happen, and deep down, he knew he didn’t want it to. Eddie turned around to face the boy that broke his heart by denying his young heart years prior. Tears stung at his eyes, and he wasn’t sure if it was from the throbbing pain his ankle was exerting, or the overwhelming amount of emotions he was feeling. He slowly turned around, cringing at the amount of pain he was feeling throughout his whole body.

“Eds holy shit are you okay?”

It may have been two years since they had last spoken, but Richie was yet to forget anything about Eddie, knowing fully well that he wasn’t okay. Eddie on the other hand, wasn’t aware of this, and believed he was doing a rather good job at concealing his feelings.

“Yeah, I’m fine, and don’t call me Eds, Richard” He spit our Richie’s name as if he was disgusted by the thought of the other boy, though he wanted nothing more than to be held by him.

“Sorry…Eddie.” He let out, his voice cracking at how much he was hurting in that moment. Eddie was about to walk away, not wanted to deal with the problem he’s avoided for so long anymore than he already has.

“Wait, let me drive you home at least! You can’t walk with your ankle fucked up like that, it’ll only make it worse.” Richie practically yelled out, not wanting Eddie to leave. No matter how hard he tried to put on the facade of someone who didn’t give a fuck, it would almost always falter when it came to the people that were important to him.

Eddie pondered Richie’s offer, knowing that he was right, but he unsure if he was mentally prepared for the awkward car that would be ahead of him if he agreed. After a few moments Eddie finally spoke up.

“Fine.”

The whole car ride Eddie tapped his foot to the loud, nostalgic rock music that Richie was playing while Richie thought up the perfect apology because he couldn’t let Eddie slip out of his hands for the second time. They pulled up to the Kaspbrak house, and Eddie placed his right hand on the door handle to exit the vehicle when Richie placed his large hand over Eddie’s left. Eddie froze not sure how this next conversation was about to play out. Richie took a deep breath before finally speaking.

“Eds I am so sorry I ever hurt you, I just didn’t understand you, my feelings, or anything really. I never meant to hurt you i just-“ Richie was speaking at a rapid pace, but somehow Eddie was able to grasp onto every word. He cut him off when he had finally had enough. He wasn’t sure what was going to come out next, but he didn’t care. He was finally going to let out all of the pent up anger he had let build up.

“Stop it Richie! I don’t want to hear your excuses anymore!” Eddie wanted to be mad, he really did, but that was extremely difficult since he could see the sincerity and utter sadness in Richie’s eyes.

“Eddie I am so sorry, for everything I-” He stopped, the two boys licking eyes. Eddie didn’t speak because he knew that Richie clearly had more to say. “I-I love you Eddie.” He was finally able to choke out what he had been feeling since he was a child, but Eddie only shook his head in disbelief.

“How fucking dare you. What makes you think you can hurt me the way you did, not speak to me for two whole fucking years, and then come back into my life as if nothing happened. Literally so much has happened Rich. You made me cry alone in my room for weeks on end, making me feel like I shouldn’t be who I am. I thought that if anyone were to accept me, it’d be you, but I was naive to that it would be okay in this shitty town we live in.” Eddie was sobbing at this point. His words were full of anger and they mushed together. “You made me feel like…like I shouldn’t love you. Like i couldn’t be your best friend.” Eddie softly let out that last part, half hoping Richie couldn’t hear him over the sounds of his sobs and heavy breathing.

Richie heard every word though, his heart breaking a bit more as he spoke each sad word. Without thinking, Richie unbuckled his seatbelt, and reached across the vehicles, pulling Eddie into a tight embrace, sobbing himself.

“Eddie, I am so sorry I made you feel that way. You don’t deserve that, I just didn’t know how to deal with my own shit. It was never you. You’re perfect Eddie.”

They sat in each other’s arms, crying until Eddie realized that he should get inside before his mother came out looking for him. They separated, looking into each other’s sad eyes for what felt like a lifetime. Richie reached up and wiped away Eddie’s tears with his thumb, and it was just as warm as Eddie remembered. A few years fell down Richie’s face as he admired Eddie’s gorgeous features. He had a feeling Eddie was about to walk out of his life for the second and final time.

“I am so sorry Eddie, and I hope that one day you can bring yourself to forgive me.”

More and more tears began to stream down his pale face he watched the love of his life step out of the car and walk into his house without looking back. Richie sat in his car crying for thirty minutes, not leaving until his vision was finally clear enough for him to drive, not knowing that Eddie sat crying in his home watching him the whole time.

perma taglist: @wlwrichie @eddiehoney @kingsteve-more-like-dadsteve @trashmouths-love-to-cuddle @puzzlin

[sorikkung]

You did an intro to got7 a while ago could you maybe do one for A.C.E.??? They seem like a good group but I'm clueless atm so it would be v helpful!!!

lololol i did an intro to mark from got7 but not got7 as a whole, but yes ofc i will i love my talented bois and i love rambling about them heRE WE G O

an introduction to a.c.e, for dummies (jk ily choice is a great fandom pls join us)

also this is gonna get rlly long so im gonna put it under a cut

A.C.E is a 5-member boygroup under beat interactive!! which is a p small company atm so my boys dont exactly have the high quality living and practice areas and food that they deserve :(( THEYLL GET THERE THO IM SURE OF IT THEYRE LEGENDS

here’s their youtube channel with aaaaall sorts of goodies

i started stanning a.c.e predebut, bc they had a lot of content for a group that hadn’t debuted yet, and it was enough to snatch my attention real quick so you should check that shit out, they did a shitton of AMAZING covers and to get their name out there more, street buskings its a lot but i swear its worth your time theyre so talented!!

also they have matching tracksuits what more could you ask for tbh (as you can see from that vid, they’re literally so fucking extra)

a few of my favs are

this rlly long busking video w girl group songs and just a bit of everything tbh,

THIS amazing remix/cover of kard’s don’t recall by the rap line + this one cute girl,

only THE most iconic playing w fire cover, band version, (I WILL NEVER STOP SCREAMING ABOUT THAT VIDEO HONESTLY I COULD MAKE A POST ON THAT COVER ALONE ISTG) 

their flashlight cover that is enough to make a grown man cry omfuckigngOD it makes me feel things hjskskkh

that ONE TAKE dance cover they did of 3 of taeyangs songs, all focusing on a different member of the dance line

im gonna stop here before i link every damn cover they made

okay so now that thats covered (bad-um-tss) time for…DEBUT

THIs beauty right here is their debut song cactus, which has this really deep meaning to it. bc they came from a small company so they have to work extra hard to even be able to debut let alone be successful and they’re like a cactus bc cacti grow in the desert where there’s very little water but they still manage to stand strong even through the hardest of weather an environment conditions and eventually sprout beautiful flowers,, buuuuuut its also a meme for obvious reasons.

tbh debut era choice culture was just listening to cactus on repeat for days bc it was their only song at the time skjslaas not much has changed tbh LMAO but yes theyre a very edm loving group so their DANCE SKILLS ARE ON POINT SERIOUSLY IVE SEEN FEW GROUPS AS AMAZING AT DANCING AS ACE WOWOW

oh yeah did i mention that their fandom name is choice and that choice are literally the softest fandom my multifandom ass has e v e r been in?? theres literally no cringy or toxic side of the fandom its just so soft and welcoming and pure and everyone is so nice and sweet and friendly and just??? wow i love choice a lot hjkskjsshkhk choice are also SUPER talented too stan talent stan choice

speaking of cringe ace is that group that just like skipped the entire “rlly cringy boygroup debut phase” completely like no weird debut haircuts or outfits or weird lyrics about girls, well actually thats all kinda objective but like they made those outfits work ok and im a cactus isnt that weird of a lyric if you know the deep meaning behind it

aS yOu CaN sEe, cactus era was the era of the tHIGHS and the hot pants. it was literally so iconic it blew up and with great reason too, have you seen those thighs?? AND THEY KNOW IT TOO they even mentioned they chose the hot pants as their style concept and took better care of their legs than their faces. true kings. heres a video of a.c.e talking about the whole hot pants thing and just their legs in general its some quality shit. and heres a video where they decide to show off just how great their thighs are bc they like to kill choices like that, this video is important and iconic bc its where the wowson ship began and also when they declared who the king of thighs were amongst the kings of thighs. definitely a necessary watch for new choice imo. donghun lowkey grinds on the floor at 4:04, you’ve been warned. honestly that video just gets progressively gayer lmao i love it

also for us international choice they made an ENGLISH cover of cactus CAN YOU BELIEVE IT I LOVE THEM SM they didnt have to but they did and oml stan a group who stans you back this hard their english aint that great but theyre trying and i appreciate it so much theyre so amazing look

five months later they dropped their second single, callin’, and b o y was this a stressful comeback, beat had us FOOLEd,, i genuinely thought it was gonna be a flowerboy soft concept yknow with like some sweet lowkey ballad or soft pop song, but nOOooOOOooo, MORE HARDSTYLE EDM not that im complaining callin is a bop but i was TRICKED

LOOK AT THIS SHIT ITS ALL AESTHETIC AND THE CLIP OF THE SONG WAS ALL SOFT I WAS REALLY EXPECTING SMTH SOFT im sorry im still salty that beat tricked me but ITS FINE bc callin is a HELLA BOP like i honestly didnt expect them to top cactus so quickly bc like cactus was hella but they DID and its amazing and heres the link be blessed (warning, these gifs above make it look like a soft vid but there are LOTS of flashing colours and lights and its really intense on the eyes if youre not comfortable with that dont watch, just listen)

they also supplied multiple dance pracs you can find on their channel for callin bc ace feeds us well, although callin had a reaaaally short promotion period bc right after they got thrown onto survival shows for more publicity, but hey, its working!! choice is growing bigger every day and im so proud

donghun, wow and jason all went on yg’s show mixnine, and jun and chan went on the idol rebooting show, the unit. both teams are doing EXTREMELY well on their respective shows!! but ill talk more about that in their individual member profiles bc they havent been put on the same team for anything yet rip

edit: mixnine finished and donghun and jason made the cut for the final group, sehyoon didn’t :(( so dongson will be promoting with the mixnine group for a lil bit!! also chan made it to the unit debut group but jun didnt. im hoping for a sehyjun subunit pls

that was long af but now im gonna dive into the members individually!! so its probs gonna get twice as long sorrynotsorry i warned you

Jun (Park Junhee)

jun is the so-called fiery leader of ace (also lead dancer and lead vocal) but is honestly just a giant dork and a sweetheart. hes the type of guy who you scream at for being dumb and call him an idiot but thats your weird way of expressing your undying love for him?? ask literally any jun stan, they’ll say they hate him. hate him for being so PERFECT like a fucking DISNEY PRINCE he’s the designated prince of the group you know theres always that one member and hes just so LOVEABLE and stupid and skjdakhkjs he fuckign dropped his cake on his birthday when do your faves ever. dad of the group, probably lost the maknaes in the shopping mall about 3 times already. talks a lot, hates aegyo, his members might be planning on sacrificing him to satan? he does on idol class with chan every…i think its wednesday and fans vote who gets punishments n stuff and jun loses every damn time i think hes losing his faith in choice lmao. #saveleaderjun

he’s kinda married to donghun, they’re the parents of ace but donghun might try murder him in his sleep idk man, but now hes on the unit with chan and theyre all cute and you can literally ship everyone with everyone in this group

he has HELLA charisma on stage tho oh my gOd also he has one of the most unique singing voices ive ever heard so its really easy to single out, his face also is the first i learned to tell apart?? he has rlly high cheekbones and a wide but thin smile.

this is actually an ot5 video not just jun but jun’s reaction was by far the most iconic so i have to put it in his section, get you a fave who can FLY lmaooo

it would be CRIMINAL if i didnt solo out jun’s ringa linga cover, thE MOST ICONIC JUN COVER EVER HJFKDSJKFDSJK if i ever stop talking about this assume im dead bc IVE NEVER GOTTEN OVER IT jun in a leather jacket looking all rude and staring at the camera like that im WEAK, SO WEAK, AAAAAAAAHHHH

[ahem] MOVING ON

Donghun (Lee Donghun)

donghun, sometimes romanised as donghoon and often referred to by choice as hun or hoon, is the oldest member of the group and another total sweetheart, honestly ace is just a group of sweethearts, he cares for his members so damn much and is super soft?? but ALSO A s Av Age he’s on mixnine with sehyoon and jason and he SHOT DOWN YG, once again I C O N I C, yg was at a loss for words, heres more receipts of him being savage, i love my sassy boyfriend. BUT HES ALSO A SWEET NOODLE HJKSHJKS oH and did you know that before he joined a.c.e he had no experience in dancing whatsoever and in a year and a half, he caught up with the other four members that have been dancing since they were kids?? I STAN TALENT YALL you’d literally never be able to guess that bc all of them are like on an equal dance level its insane

also he used to have braces during cactus era and it was the softest shit

[cOUGHS] so like did someone say disrespect,,, bc he can do that too,,,,, aAAAAAAAH the duality of this man istg

he’s the main vocalist and has vO C AL S OF AN A N GEL, he has so much soul and emotion in his voice, and has adlibs for days oh my god, he also has the MOST BEAUTIFUL FALSETTO i’ve ever heard, fight me, actually come at me. his voice works REALLY well with chan so they pair him up with him for quite a handful of covers like the all of me one i linked (one of my favs omfg it makes me emo) cause like, his soulful voice plus chan’s higher, sweet voice just sounds so great together i love our main vocals wow.

sPEAKING OF WOW,

Wow (Kim Sehyoon)

his stage name is wow, but its hard to take seriously so the fandom just calls him sehyoon lmfao. it used to be seyoon but when he went on mixnine, he revealed sehyoon was the official romanization so here we are lmao. even if your bias isn’t sehyoon…it’s sehyoon. he’s just that guy ya feel me?? anyways sehyoon is a relatively quiet and reserved guy, but his members really pull out the dork in him, i love it so much?? he doesn’t talk much but when he does all of a.c.e directs their full attention to him to listen, its really sweet, hes pretty awkward with people but you can tell he just feels so safe and comfortable with ace it honestly warms my heart. he’s the main rapper and main dancer, but!! our multitalented man is also a vocalist. yes, you heard, me, the main rapper can sing, and really well at that. (if you scroll up back to the flashlight and dont recall covers, you can see more of his voice.)

gets the least lines, but not by much. although hearing his singing voice in their actual songs has happened like with 2 lines?? so idk man im just waiting for their ballad song that theyre apparently doing for their third song, god im so ready. i love his voice a lot, damn.

he’s also like reeeeeeeeeally gay for jason…the entire fandom ships it and they even ship it themselves. wowson, the otp of ace, they honestly just cant keep their hands off eachother??? i know a friend who struggled to tell apart jun and jason so she just looked at who sehyoon was standing next to and instantly knew it was jason. THEYRE SO CLINGY. i love my squishy boyfriends. 

OHHH BOY…i really could’ve used an even more disrespectful gif than this but that would ruin the surprise of watching it in the actual video!! as you can see, sehyoon is the K I N G of disrespect on stage, that shy lil fluffle bean you see offstage?? GONE. DISAPPEARED. VANISHED. this is why his stage name is wow, sehyoon disappears and you just go wow. choice has dubbed him king of bodyrolls with great reason, he makes every concept into a sexy concept, he just has that intimidatingly sexy aura to him, its incredible. 

now…are you ready….i bet youre not…who am i kidding NOBODY was ready for this shit. on mixnine, sehyoon was picked as leader for one of their stages (i think he was leader for ringa linga too??) and got to choreograph the routine. if you think its already rude 10 seconds in, its all over for you bitches when the lighting goes yellow. i feel the need to repeat, our boy CHOREOGRAPHED THIS. IT WAS ALL HIS IDEA. EVERY. SINGLE. PART. this is the same kid who everyone on the show knew as the shy, quiet, handsome boy. but then. 

but then he did this.

Jason (Kim Byeongkwan)

jason is his stage name that he chose for himself but his real name is byeongkwan, its another case of an idol having a stage name and nobody calling them by it?? i mean most new choice call him jason and i personally switch between the two but most choice seem to call him byeongkwan or bk if theyre extra lazy lmao. memers call him byonk sometimes.

jason is the weird child of the group and we all love him…he’s the second lil ball of sunshine and part ½ of the maknae line. he’s often found clinging to sehyoon or literally any of the members bc he’s an affectionate son who loves cuddles okay?? p r o t e c t   h i m.

he’s also the lead everything. yeah thats really not fair but jason is op ok?? singing, rapping, dancing, visual, like sehyoon he’s the full package, i can hardly call them the rap line they’re just the op line t b h. triple threats.

on their official twt jason likes to confirm wowson a lot, its p great lololol he’s the biggest wowson shipper of all time. want more wowson? i gotchu, here’s one of my absolute fav moments. (ft. junchan/chun)

he has some HELLA CHARISMA on stage like boy can u pls chill. they also love doing his eye makeup with that red makeup and it looks rlly good bc bk has such pretty eagle eyes and its his Look™ and that along with his onstage persona is a DEADLY COMBINATION HDSJKSKSLKJS 

i’m just gonna keep this short; even if your bias isnt byeongkwan, your bias is byeongkwan. he has that affect on everybody. number one bias wrecker out of the fandom t b h apart from sehyoon (he cant be my bias wrecker if he is my bias so im safe :^J)

Chan (Kang Yuchan)

INTRODUCING OUR CHANSHINE, MAIN VOCAL OF ACE, CUTIE MAKNAE CHAN!!!! he always introduces himself as a.c.e’s main vocal cutie maknae chan, its his iconic line and it suits him so well like LOOK AT HIM ISNT HE JUST A FUCKING RAY OF SUNSHINE WHAT A PURE CHILD I MUST PROTECC he’s literally the happy virus y’all AND ACE KNOWS IT TOO heres this one time where donghun even said that looking at chan cheers him up. certified sunshines only, everyone. also watch that whole video its long but its worth your time.

anyways our boy is a main vocal and as mentioned in donghun’s part they harmonize!!! so!! well!! i mean tbh all of ace can harmonize with eachother its the most beautfiul thing but these two are main vocal for a reason okay. if you didn’t already watch it in donghun’s part listen to THIS and have your ears be blessed i cry everytime oh my god skdfhd ALSO THIS IS SUPER IMPORTANT ITS LIKE ONE OF MY FAVOURITE VIDEOS ON THE INTERNET i want to cry i lvoe chans voice so much i love chan i love kang yuchan og hmylhdg sodf i was gonna say i swear im sehyoon biased but im not istg ace is bias wrecking me 24/7 its been the hardest group to pick a bias in ever im not kidding i cant even

also known as kang RUDE, chan was all innocent sunshine and daisies until out of the blue he decided to give the disrespect king sehyoon a run for his fucking money. NOBODY FUCKING SAW IT COMING WE ALL THOUGHT HE WAS SO PURE AND THEN HE SUDDENLY STARTED FLASHING HIS ABS EVERYWHERE AND GRINDING ON THE FLOOR AND DOING THAT AND WE JUST CANT HANDLE IT i dont know a kang yuchan please save me oh my lord

okay this already has an ungodly amount of links and honestly i could go on, but this should be a good enough kickstart for you!!

stan talent stan a.c.e everyone. welcome to the choice family. its literally the softest and sweetest fandom out there. we welcome you with open arms and lots of cacti!!!

[sadghostdyke]

the language of need pairings

going into more detail about the pairings in the third fic from that last post bc im feeling Emotions about it so

in this au the events of it (2017) takes place in the late 1970s/early 1980s. 

beverly marsh/ben hanscom (ben is a trans girl obviously): when i think of this pairing i think of books and tacky but still sweet postcards with poetry written on the back. curling up in bed next to one another and not having to say anything because both of them just know what the other is thinking. big sweaters and rifling through the mail everyday. they probably read virginia woolf and margaret atwood. 

also very sad because as kids they eventually forget each other bc of pennywise so they keep those habits of looking through the mail desperately hoping to see a letter but they don't know why and every time beverly sees the name ben she feels Something in her chest like an ache or a longing but she doesn't know what it is

beverly marsh & susan pevensie (nonromantic): i have a feeling that beverly would get crushes on older women a lot after her dad bc i mean. being gay i know i had lots of crushes on older women when i was a kid and it's also a common thing that happens after sexual assault. so. i just picture susan pevensie in her early 50s, still a beauty, dark hair now streaked with silver, perpetually dressed to the nines, her apartment full of books and antiques that she shares with beverly, and 12-year-old bev thinking 'wow this woman is so cool..... i love her so much....' because shes never had an adult woman treat her so lovingly and she has difficulty separating platonic & romantic affection in her mind (esp. towards adults)

susan is somewhat aware that beverly is in puppy love with her and kinda just skirts around the topic and teaches beverly about cool stuff. beverly's aunt is nice and everything but she's not really sure how to deal with kids, let alone heavily traumatized ones, so she leaves beverly to her own devices to a certain extent and so beverly kinda latches on to susan as a parental figure. its pretty bittersweet tho bc only a year and a half later they have to move for bev's aunt's job. 

beverly marsh/charlie mcgee: in case you don't know- charlie mcgee is another stephen king character (this one from the book firestarter). she & her dad andy are on the run from the government bc they have powers- charlie especially. a couple of months after beverly moves to hawkins indiana, charlie and andy shows up in bev's backyard and beverly's aunt lets them stay in the house for a week or song. charlie is a rlly mysterious figure to beverly and even though beverly doesn't know her for all that long she kind of idolizes charlie as a ~mysterious figure~ and develops a crush on her- not on her as a person but as an ideal figure. 

beverly marsh/max mayfield: this is an au so they're around the same age even though according to 'timelines' max should be like .... seventeen when beverly is twelve. but anyways. they're both fourteen and beverly is like wow this cool girl has a skateboard...... im going to befriend her!!! and max agrees to give beverly skateboarding lessons. they kiss a couple of times but its mostly just the kind of 'i like you let's spend tons of time together and call each other our girlfriend' relationship and max gives beverly star wars band-aids when she scrapes her knees and explains the entirety of star wars to her as beverly nods excitedly. they have movie marathons and watch star trek and race each other a lot (beverly on her bike, max on her skateboard). anyways they're cute and sweet and it's the longest relationship either of them have ever had (its about a year long) but eventually they break up, partially because beverly is moving, partially because they're both fifteen and max thinks it's time for them to date other people

beverly marsh/carrie white: they meet when they're both sixteen. beverly is now a solidly butch babe and falls head-over-heels for the willowy femme with long blonde hair who is very smart. they bond over bad parents and ptsd and their shared love of shakespeare. it's love at first sight and they care an incredibly large amount about one another because they just click. together both of them start to process their trauma together and its really helpful to have someone else who understands by their side. when margaret white hits carrie really hard, beverly gives her bruise care cream at school the next day. they have study dates and beverly is super super in love with the way that carrie bites the end of her pencil. 

about a year later they get caught by margaret white (carrie gives beverly a goodbye kiss when beverly is dropping off carrie at her house) and margaret sees and just goes wild. she raises her hand to hit carrie and beverly moves in front of her gf to take the hit and the resulting backhand cuts her face pretty deep because margaret is wearing a ring and carrie sees beverly bleeding and just snaps and lashes out with her telekinesis and manually stops margaret's heart and she dies. the two of them are like..... okay. that happened. they cover it up because tbh margaret deserved it and carrie moves in with beverly and they go on with their lives.

it breaks beverly's heart when they split up. carrie's going to an east coast college to get a degree in education and developmental psychology and beverly's going to the west coast to get a degree in art and neither of them want to split up but neither of them know what else to do. so they break up and it Sucks.

beverly marsh/kay mcall: after carrie and bev break up beverly just. Collapses in the relationship department. she stops dating and starts messing around with kay (who is in denial about being bisexual) and it's very much in the department of 'we have great sex but you won't acknowledge me outside of it' and it just sucks 

im gonna pick this up later but that's most of the pairings right now

[auroraphilealis]

no i rlly lved the drbel & since u've agreed i hve this idea stuck in my hd like 4ever tht evr since dan met phl he loved to come up from behind n cuddle himn whisper cute things to him n kiss his neck etc& phil got all shy/ slowly he felt dan grow in height from how his head came b/w phil's shoulder blades to resting his chin on top of phil's head & in a vry busy week like dan didn't do it & phil missed it so much tht he led dan up behind him while he wshed dishes & wrped his arms rnd hmslf agh

Fic under the cut, as it turned into more than either of us was probably expecting!

carry me through the dark

summary: the one where dan was always phil’s strength, and his confidence, and he holds him up through it all.

(ao3) 

–

when phil first meets dan, he can’t seem to keep his hands off of him. he’s just really shy, despite most people believing that he’s not, thanks to youtube and his overly quirky attitude, and he doesn’t know what to do with himself when he’s in front of his crush, so he just kind of claws at dan and pokes at his cheeks and keeps hugging his side. all the while, phil’s got this super bright blush, and he can’t stop smiling and giggling and making little animal noises. dan doesn’t mind, though. dan’s never been given so much affection in his life, and he finds himself falling in love with phil so fucking fast it isn’t even funny.

at the top of the manchester eye, dan’s the one to kiss phil. phil’s doing that thing where he makes jokes again, poking at dan’s side to see if he gets them at all, and grinning with his tongue poking through his teeth. it’s so cute, makes dan feel so warm inside, that he just can’t seem to help it when he leans over close and presses his mouth to phil’s. 

at first, it’s all teeth because phil was in the middle of laughing, you know? but it doesn’t matter because phil is so stunned that dan’s able to make it work. 

when he pulls away, phil’s so red he can’t even speak, and dan just kind of grins at him and kisses him again. 

later, when they head home, dan’s the one who takes charge. terrified to do the wrong thing, phil just kind of blushes and heads into the kitchen to get them both some water, but dan follows him, and he comes up behind phil, and he wraps his arms around his waist and drags him in close. at first, his face just kind of slots between phil’s shoulder blades, he’s so small and short, and phil tenses up in his arms, but dan just kind of kisses phil through his shirt as he grins and turns his head so he can rest his cheek against phil. 

phil reaches up tentatively to touch his fingers to dan’s hands, and he literally melts as his clutches tight back to dan. he can’t believe this is happening, as weird as it sounds, and he’s always been the shy one, but here’s dan, holding him so tight. 

then dan pushes up on his tip toes, until his chin just brushes phil’s shoulder, and he whispers in his hear just how cute he finds him. he tells phil that he thought it was sweet the way he clawed at him today, and how it made him all blushy and shy too, but that he just hadn’t been able to help himself from leaning forward and kissing phil when he did that thing with his tongue and…

and it keeps happening. dan moves to manchester for uni, and he spends more than half of his time in phils apartment, and they aren’t dating, not for a while, except they so totally are. they don’t put a label on it because phil’s too scared to ask and dan doesn’t believe this is really happening, but then phil asks dan to move in and dan asks phil if they’re partners, and phil kisses him gentle on the lips and tells him, “of course we are. i love you.” 

the way dan holds phil in bed later is reminiscent to that first time. dan’s the big spoon because phil’s always wanted to be held, but his face hardly comes to between phil’s shoulder blades again. it doesn’t seem to matter; dan’s arms are just so warm, as his breathe, and dan keeps inhaling phil’s scent, and that’s all that matters.

he whispers words of love into the fabric of phil’s t-shirt, and phil keeps his blush hidden in his hands, and dan’s the only one who truly understands just how shy phil truly is. he does the talking for both of them, because he’s the romantic, and phil doesn’t know how to say i love you without a kiss, but that’s okay.

that’s okay, because dan knows how to say i love you with his lips and his hands, and he’s the one who guides them both through it all.

steadily, dan grows taller and taller, until one day, he wraps his arms around phil’s waist again and drags him back and into his chest, and now his chin rests comfortably on phil’s shoulder. he presses kisses into the skin of phil’s neck, and he whispers sweet words into his ear, and he takes phil to bed because he’s always the one who does. 

but he doesn’t always take phil to bed, no, sometimes he just nibbles on phil’s ear lobe and teases him, or hugs him tight and reassures him that they’re going to be okay, and in 2012 when things seem bad, dan promises phil that he’ll do everything he can to protect him, to protect them, with his chin resting on phil’s shoulder and his lips right at his ear.

phil believes him, because phil always believes dan, and dan has always been phil’s strength. 

it seems to happen suddenly, dan becoming taller than phil. one moment, he’s still gotta push up on his toes a bit to kiss phil on the forehead, and the next, he’s wrapping his arms around phil all over again and this time, this time, his chin rests comfortable on phil’s head, and when did that happen.

phil feels small, for the first time. 

for years, it’s felt almost wrong that dan’s the one whose held phil through the rough times, always his support, his structure, because phil was so much bigger than him, but then one day dan wraps his arms around phil’s body, and he rests his head on top of phil’s, and he laughs because he can do that now, and phil just kind of… stills. 

because when did that happen?

and he feels properly small, and warm, and cocooned in dan’s arm. he feels right, like this was how it was meant to be the whole damn time. he melts, all over again, like he did that very first time, and he feel’s safe. 

dan doesn’t seem to notice. maybe it’s normal to him. maybe phil always melts, he doesn’t know, but dan just kind of laughs, and teases him, and pokes him in his sides, and phil just lets him. he laughs back, and doesn’t even fight, because he’s too busy reveling in this moment of warmth. 

later, he’ll notice how big dan’s hands have gotten, how broad his shoulders. he’ll notice the way dan’s been filling out all this time, and he’ll curl up backwards in dan’s arms at night, and he’ll think this is it, this is all ive ever wanted, and sigh. 

but then things will get complicated, and busy, and dan’s always there for him, he is, but he isn’t holding phil anymore. they haven’t got the time. they’re on tour, and then tour, and then on tour, and they’re so tired and sweaty and wired that they can’t sleep at night. dan’s there to fight off the crowds, and to argue with angry parents, and keep phil from having to deal, but he doesn’t help him the way he used to, and it’s hard.

it’s hard because phil misses it so goddamn much. he just wants dan’s arms wrapped around him tight, want’s dan’s head pressing on top of his, and his voice in his ear, and his lips on his neck, and his nose nuzzling at his skin. he wants dan keeping him safe, and warm, and small. 

he takes his chance the week they come home, and they decide not to unpack or post or deal with the internet at all. they’re on vacation in their own home, and that’s when phil strikes. 

he’s making dinner in the kitchen, and he’s tired - bone deep tired, exhausted to the point of collapse. He’s only one his feet now because he’s got to eat, and after months on the road, he’s tired of fast food and take out. he’s determined to make dinner for him and dan tonight, and yet hes so tired that he can feel tears pricking at his eyes. he wishes he could just. not. but he will.

so when dan wanders into the kitchen, lured by the scent of tomato sauce and cooking beef, phil turns around and stares at him for less than a second before he walks right on up to him, grabs dan’s arms, and drags them around his waist. 

dan inhales sharply, surprised, gets out a half uttered “-uh?” before phil turns around in his arms and just kind of rests back against his body. his head falls backwards, finds a soft spot on dan’s shoulders, and he closes his eyes as dan’s arms automatically tighen around him. 

there’s the soft rumble of laughter against phil’s back. 

“missed this?” dan asks.

“always,” phil replies, and reaches up to grab dan’s arms in his. he holds him tightly, just like that first time so many years back, and sighs, because dan has always held him through the toughest of times, and now, he’ll always hold him through the best as well.

[ravenvsfox]

i know you probably have SO MANY prompts to do because theyre absolutely phenomenal...but when you get the chance could you write your prompt for #46 from Andrew's POV? i think you could do it so well and i would die.

(god... ‘phenomenal’ ur such a sweetheart! I don’t usually like to write the same scene twice so I rlly tried to make it as different as possible outside of dialogue hope it works 4 u xoxo)

Andrew wheels around in the search-light sweep of laser projectors, suddenly aware of his place in the thicket of heat-pressed bodies. He turns his back on Roland and Aaron talking over the bar, Kevin knocking back shots with a regularity that makes him look like he’s on some sort of mechanism.

Neil’s heat is gone from his side. If he’s the buoy that saves Neil from drowning, he’s lost him to the swallowing water again.

He’d had his hand knotted around Neil’s wrist as a security measure, but he’d slipped it. Escape artist, Andrew thinks. Runner.

It would be okay if Roland hadn’t been pouring him free shots for 2 hours, if Andrew hadn’t been indifferently nodding Neil on, privately curious to see what the alcohol might do.

Turns out it mostly flushed his fair cheeks and loosened his hands, made his eyes look curiously like the pupils had detached from the irises. And now he’s wandered off like an untrained dog.

The crowd is a dangerous, forgetful place, and Neil is bad at pretending not to be drunk.

Andrew leaves the bar with a sideways look at Roland. He’s always uneasy when his responsibilities are split like this: Aaron trying to keep up with Kevin’s alcoholic appetite, Nicky long since disappeared onto the dance floor, Neil holding his liquor like a newborn.

He sidesteps a drunken bachelorette conga line, sweeping the room in uneven loops. Drunk people are unpredictable people, and Neil’s slippery on a good day. He can’t spot his familiar auburn head in the throng, and the lights warp and dull his colouring anyway.

He rounds back to Aaron and Kevin, watching them droop and laugh, and then he makes for the bathroom.

He’s just in time to watch Nicky and Neil topple into the bathroom counter, his cousin’s hands displaced from Neil’s narrow waist.

“Why do bad things always happen to me?” Neil says, the hand holding his weight up moving absently over the wall. He’d laugh, if he laughed, at Neil’s dramatic intonation, his body bobbing as if on water, his shoulders unselfconsciously back.

“You’ve got a mouth that gets you into trouble,” he says. Neil almost slips in his haste to turn around, his whole face twisting up even as Nicky has to re-steady him, huffing. Andrew’s chest throbs. “And you can’t hold your liquor.” He wedges his hands under Nicky’s and pops them off of Neil’s body.

Nicky knows better by now than to overstep with neil, and Andrew steps forward to remind him — but Neil stumbles suddenly, Andrew has to sidestep to catch him.

“Were you looking for me?” Neil asks, crowding into Andrew’s space with his breath moist and boozy on his face. He slips his hand up to cup Andrew’s neck, thumbing his pulse like a habit. Andrew watches Nicky so he won’t watch Neil; if the feel of him is too much, the sight of him is always worse. He has to get out of this bathroom.

He waves Nicky out of his way, a noisy obstacle in a maze made more difficult by Neil necklaced around him.

“You’re so strong,” Neil says. “Nothing can move you.” Andrew stomachs that for a minute, and Nicky laughs obnoxiously behind them. Andrew’s hand flexes on Neil’s hip as he rounds on Nicky. He says his name once, warning, and Nicky raises his hands in surrender.

“Hey, hey, wait, I don’t want to get in the way of all that raw, masculine strength—“ he mocks, dancing backwards and out the door when Andrew swings at him with an open hand. He has to tell each finger individually to fold back into his fist. He’s so tense along the line of his back that you could probably chop wood with his shoulder blades.

Neil’s still pawing at him, saying, “wait, that wasn’t a joke. You’re—“ he looks into and past Andrew’s eyes. “Hey remember when the Ravens took 150 shots on goal and you embarrassed them?” He remembers, because he always remembers, and he also knows it was a lost game for the foxes. It only mattered to Andrew, for a moment, because it mattered to Neil.

Neil makes grabbing Andrew for balance look like a calculated, intimate move, and he’s breathing Andrew’s breath when he says: “watching you… I’ve never felt anything like it.”

Andrew puts as much space between them as he can while still holding Neil upright. He wants to prop Neil on the bathroom counter and walk away. He wants to funnel the alcohol directly from his veins so he can kiss his mouth.

“You’re drunk.”

“I’m right,” Neil says instantly. Andrew suspects those words are always on the cusp of being said, with Neil. “I’m always right.” Andrew gives him a scathing look, an eye roll too lazy to do any actual rolling.

“You always think you are.” He tries to wrangle Neil’s limbs into some kind of order, and Neil keeps undoing his progress.

“You won’t kiss me in front of them.”

“I won’t kiss you at all,” Andrew says. Neil’s mouth is messy and half open like he’s seconds from arguing or leaning in. It’s a frustratingly unselfconscious look on Neil, who is always applying his facial expressions as disguises. “I will leave you on the floor in a club bathroom.” He probably won’t. But if he did it would solve the host of problems constantly hanging over his head like tempting, bruised fruit.

They finally come out of the doorway of the bathroom and into the humid body of the club. Neil’s supporting his own weight, but with the backward tilt of someone whose internal compass is two degrees off.

“Andrew,” he says, and Andrew stops tugging him along. He hates that he’ll do whatever Neil says, whatever he doesn’t even have to say. “I don’t want to be drunk anymore.”

He falls, cut at the knees like he’s been hit. Andrew lunges for him and gets a fistful of shirt and hair just before impact. He lowers him the last two inches to the floor, hands clenching all over Neil. He takes them away and there’s blood, suddenly, a sticky bridge between his hand and Neil’s scalp.

He looks down at him, seething, walking hands over the rest of him in search of injury. He finds a smashed fist he can’t believe he didn’t notice, and a bruise trying to eat his hip.

“I hit my head, earlier,” Neil says, explaining absolutely nothing. He laughs and grins and hooks his own fingers in the smile to get rid of it. Andrew pulls it all apart — hand from smile, smile from mouth, holding Neil’s face by the jaw until it relaxes in his palm.

“You’re a mess,” Andrew tells him, still holding him together.

“I’ve heard that one before,” Neil says, sounding curiously sober as he loops himself around Andrew and stands.

“It always applies.”

“And yet, here you are. Cleaning me up,” he says, too close to look at directly again.

“I preferred you when you refused to drink.” He remembers pouring shots for Neil and watching him for a nod or a yes that never came. He remembers Neil’s strange complex about drugs and alcohol, his old off-centre way of choosing which crimes were excusable.

He pushes Neil up against the nearest wall, watching the way the alcohol plays with his mouth and eyes, not really liking it.

“When I was more secrets than person?” Neil whispers.

“When you were quiet,” Andrew snaps, splaying a hand over Neil’s chest and stepping back, watching the bar slosh, looking out for familiar blond or towering muscle.

“Never happened,” Neil’s saying, laughing a little, and Andrew digs his fingers into Neil’s chest, a little bit warning, a little agreeing. He feels Neil go soft under his hand, reaching up to twist his fingers in Andrew’s.

“Hey. I trust you.”

Andrew’s still looking into the crowd, but Neil’s voice is torn open, and it feels like Andrew’s touching his cracked chest, blood and ribs at his fingertips. “You’re still drunk. And a poor judge of character.”

“If it makes you feel better.”

He looks back at Neil, wanting to feed him a percentage or cut him off with an insult, wanting to stop this particular bud before it can grow. But then Aaron walks up, and Andrew’s eyes go to him instead.

“We’re leaving. Nicky got into a fight with some guy and Roland had to sneak him out the back.”

Andrew’s world shifts, and it’s only then that he realizes it had been facing towards Neil. Anger pinches his veins. He isn’t covering enough ground lately — he’s spread too thin because he’s giving 80% of himself to Neil. You’re negligent, he thinks. You’re as unbalanced as everyone’s always said.

“Nicky got in a fight?” Neil asks as Roland and Kevin come up, glancing at each other with a fresh camaraderie that Andrew doesn’t like at all.

Roland must catch Andrew’s expression because he raises a placating hand. “Some homophobe in a snapback. It’s fine.” He reaches for Andrew and Andrew bodily steps out of his grip, his ears ringing at the thought of skin to skin contact. “He’s long gone, Drew,” Roland says, trying to help like aiming a bow at a target and hitting the ground right in front of him instead. “We got him. Focus on your boy.”

Andrew knows without looking how Neil is reacting to that comment, because it’s strange and frequent how Neil’s outsides match Andrew’s insides.

“I’m fine.”

“I bet. Can’t fool the guy pouring your drinks for you.” He ruffles Neil’s hair. Andrew wrestles with frustration so deep and unspoken that it’s lapping at the back of his throat.

“We should go,” Kevin says, and something skewed and impatient lances through Andrew at the suggestion. 

He spent too much time talking Neil down in the bathroom. Neil is a dirty move in a fight Andrew’s been in for as long as he can remember — a flashy distraction that knocked Andrew back.

They pile out of the club through the back, walking back to the car at Andrew’s pace. Kevin’s dragging Neil or vice versa, and Aaron’s walking apart from them, posture too high up in his shoulders to be convincingly sober.

They find Nicky in the car looking grim for trying so hard not to. Andrew grabs him by the shoulders and pats him down, and Nicky looks touched enough that he doesn’t crack any jokes.

Andrew spends the drive home strategizing, telling himself furiously that Neil shouldn’t get a tier of his own. He needs to hold him at arms length before he loses sight of things that have mattered for longer.

They reach the house and three fifths of the car find their sloppy way inside. Andrew watches them to make sure the door gets closed, ignoring Neil’s eyes flitting to and away from him.

His eyes finally slide over to Neil’s reflection. The usual firm set of his mouth is back, but his eyes are still overly wide, like he’s surprised to see himself. He catches Andrew’s gaze and smiles, and Andrew’s already finished with whatever Neil’s about to say, he’s already planning tomorrow morning, something viable, doable. Everything under one roof. Him and Neil in one shower. Hot chocolate in the kitchen.

“You’re a terrible drunk,” Andrew says, because it’s the thing that’s been backing him into corners all night.

“I haven’t had much practice.”

Andrew’s eyes wander from the reflection to Neil’s actual face. His burns are caught in the moonlight like something glossy, cling wrap stretched over cheekbone. “There’s a reason for that. You’ve got a big mouth.”

Neil smiles. “You seem to have a fixation on my mouth.” He leans in, and Andrew wants it, stupidly. He shoves Neil back to his side of the car with a hand over the burns he’d been ogling.

“You seem to be under some delusions.”

“It’s just that I’m a neck man, myself,” Neil says, voice topped up with laughter. Andrew gets out of the car without hesitation, slamming it so he can avoid whatever Neil says next.

He still hears it though, raised to reach him halfway to the door. “I know it’s been a tense night, Drew,” Neil says, and catches up to sidestep in front of Andrew, sober enough now to walk backwards all the way to the porch. “But I’m still waiting to be kissed.”

Andrew feels a full body flash of irritation that he can’t be. He shrugs Neil off and walks through the front door. “Sober up.”

Inside, he walks the length of the house twice, restlessly. He opens doors to find Kevin asleep with his shirt halfway off his arms, Aaron having a stare-off with his reflection, Nicky lit up by the glow of his phone, speaking softly in german.

He strips Eden’s Twilight off and takes a 5 AM shower with his mouth parted against the spray. There’s an itch in his lungs that might be for a cigarette or might be for something else entirely.

He goes through the motions of pulling on sweats and armbands almost spitefully slow, tucking his cigarettes into his sleeve and padding out into the hallway. The moon panels the carpet with ghostly swatches, the wall clock counts his steps.

He watches Neil outside the screen door, tracking his hands folding around his knees, his feet scuffing the pavement. He looks for signs that he’s still drunk and gets distracted by the unmarred line of his neck.

He goes out to sit on the stoop with him and lets himself pretend to smoke for long enough that Neil is morning warm when he leans in to kiss him.

(He lets himself acknowledge that Neil isn’t a distraction — he’s a debilitating move. He’s the strike that knocks Andrew to the ground.)