#okay wow sorry i wrote you an actual novel

[quietbluejay]

The Buried Dagger 1

OKAY mortarion time ….i forgot this was the book with purple prose and i had to go back in terror to make sure I didn't accidentally buy a McNeill novel again i did not, this is thankfully (?) someone else

I'm trying to figure out what about this pushes it into "Wow Edgy" rather than being genuinely compelling well actually this isn't too bad, to be honest, it's really the next bit which is that the population of ynyx (and WHAT a name) doesn't have mouths "the cold ember of his familiar, obdurate resentment" I feel like I'm being unfair to the book by feeling bathos instead of pathos but i think it's that everything is so over the top

wait what year was this written Mortarion is literally breathing in the chemicals 2019 I'm now going to suffer from the belief that the writer of this was listening to Radioactive (due to this plus some other things) and now I've got it stuck in my head

i want to take this seriously but i just can't, I'm sorry no one understands meeeeeeeee owo uncomfortable memory surfaces

i will say this, the prose is quite evocative

ok so mort has a giant chip on his shoulder and is an enormous misanthrope but just about every single person who has ever been in a position of authority over him DOES just use him as a tool

boy did he choose the wrong side of the war

tumblr has poisoned my mind regarding "the horrors" so it feels like "every day mortarion gets emails" mortarion: hm maybe i should get rid of the daemon and also all the stuff i used to summon him and go back to normal warfare

holy shit holy shit he really is his father's son also hey uhhh mortarion do you remember that whole slippery slope speech you gave at Nikaea about literally this exact topic

the irony is killing me you're killing me, Reaper of Men, and I'm not even a man the manreaper of….justice (????) is unisex oh yeah i forgot to bring it up but Mort calling Magnus an "arrogant braggant" fills my salty soul with glee

morty continues to try out for that fantasy villain role i think i'm warming up to the prose though

im breathing in the chemicals- im breathing in the chemicals- im breathing in the chemicals-

i think swallow's cd kept skipping while he wrote this

this is the third time he's breathed in the chemicals

it's totally not a ritual, honest! okay, this is a cool fight scene mortarion can be cool in a fight, as a treat

lmao

yes. this is funny to me. Mortarion is just so done with this whole thing Mort: why did i get sent on this sidequest rip typhon killstealing

mortarion would really like to be starring in a different genre oh no cursed idea my thought was "what genre would be funniest to put him in" which was followed by "this is our get-along harem protagonist" but it's mort and rob idk at the end of godblight they got yeeted my next thought was magical girl anime he's the dark magical girl's mascot creature he is having friendship! just hdu call him and the magical girl friends

typhon plotting out how to ambush mortarion with a hug

uhhhhhh

typhon: yeahhhh better not bring up the Fallen honestly typhon feels like one of the most intelligent characters in the series! ….huh why weren't the dark angels at Terra

dude and then typhon internally cackles evilly like a kids show villain everything is going according to keikaku does your brain on nurgle turn you into snidely whiplash?

Mortarion what the heck

normal behaviour to go along with the poison drinking or breathing in the chemicals and breathing in the chemicals- and breathing in the okay i'll stop

literally everyone on the ship is choking but typhon that was fast owo flashback time

okay so his evil dad (the first one) sent him out with golems to fight other golem things from other evil overlords as a test of some kind this is just his entire life, huh

oh lovely like wow the only reason mortarion's alive is that he's a primarch the abuse is kind of getting to ridiculous angst-fic levels and yet the way it's written is genuinely compelling? probably because he's not actually a normal human so it is survivable and not ridiculous but it is kind of walking on that line thrown to starving dogs when he was a toddler like

this really is his entire life huh

annnnd also Necare experimented on him with poison what next did necare give him a dog and then kill the dog in front of him we're starting to get into bathos here

the last bit of this scene is, yeahh

a bit. on the overwrought side.

The book is tap dancing on the line which is to be honest, making me sad i really want this to be good :/

if it's going to go all the way into goofy, i want it to go all the way so i can mock it if it's going to be half hard hitting and half goofy it feels like im pulling back to punch a small child this book also unfortunately has some kind of subplot on earth with a bunch of rando characters and also, unfortunately, Garro

oh this is i guess foreshadowing for what's going to happen to the death guard? so garro's friend got hit by an evil knife and unlike guilliman he did not have plot armour

so garro is working with a bunch of other dudes who defected from the traitor legions secretly working for malcador oh, and a psyker ultramarine

oh wait psyker ultramarine met garro on calth??? what??? how did he get to calth and back what is a timeline (i should be fair and stop banging on about this since i have not actually read the relevant books. at least I assume this has to be covered in a book I didn't read)

oh yeah sure let's undress the catatonic chained up woman oh she's a sister of silence my beloved

okay so context she had her name and serial number tattooed under her collarbone so. i guess that was more important??? apparently??? they did not take off the chains they just snapped them off of the wall and basically pushed her to start walking you couldn't just. pick her up??? wouldn't that be faster?? okay this was funny malcador sends an illusion of himself across the planet

I'm rolling my eyes

this is the guy running the imperium

does he have nothing better to do also why give them the job in the first place if he's not going to trust them not to "creatively reinterpret" his commands

oh we're back with Teen Mort and he keeps a diary ohhh a bunch of humans are rebelling and attacking

oh it's Teen Typhon meeting Teen Mort

psychic powers time

this is not the time to get angsty also he is kind of a grimdark rapunzel huh

back in the present and apparently mort broods a lot in his room and if you interrupt him he yells at you because of course he does you're interrupting his linkin park listening bluejay note: i love linkin park so i am allowed to make this joke annnd typhon is setting up the navigators on the ship to take the blame oh he just killed them all that was fast and now they're all trapped blind in the warp and typhon is being obviously evil and according to keikaku which is visible to everyone but Mort well tbf to Mort, he's very angry at Typhon for killing the navigators so he's probably missing stuff

typhon: this lifeboat is full of leeches just trust me typhon: throws it overboard

back in the past, Mort successfully rescues the spunky teens but his dad is coming so he tells them to get out while they can and then has his disney princess song realization that it's time to stand up for himself and he'd do it all again! and face his dad! and dieeeee okay the last bit isn't disney princess …ah

ah mort: wait, that's an option??? rip his hair is getting in his eyes i hate when that happens

okay this is a cheesy line but it's working here

okay i made the joke before about mortarion being the kind of guy who likes to stand on cliffs/balcony edges and look down but i DIDNT KNOW IT WAS LITERALY DONT STARE INTO THE WARP YOU IDIOT

i. oh boy we get to see an emperor-mort interaction

i think the emperor is….actually trying here? but what the emperor is trying to say here is not what mort took from it

[catbountry]

Hi, I'm the one who made the Respawn of the Dead page on Fanlore. I'm sorry about the misinformation about you being an admin and it's fixed to be accurate now to say you were just a mod.

And I'm sorry about not disclosing that you've since distanced yourself from that site. Thats now in there too. I respect you as a fic writer both for your fic (loved the TF2 Harlan Ellison and Steven King-inspired ones) and because it's impressive that you've kept your username for so long. I think that literally everyone who's been online long enough can theoretically be "canceled" on the Internet if everything they've ever done was connected to only one pseud, including myself. Fandom's honestly a minefield that doesn't take to cultural changes at all. The culture of, say, 4chan, Tf2chan, those things, it's so different compared to today. Same with Kiwifarms when it was just known for being the CWCwiki. One day, the culture of social media will be just like those, and I think being able to own up to who you were then to compare with how you are now, as a better person, is a respectable skill to have.

I don't know everything you've done, (I know some of the Vade thing and some of what's on the receipt blog,) but it seems some Fannish people just see "Kiwifarms" and think you're supporting the site as it is currently, which wasn't what it was back in the 2010s. I tried to be very neutral since I figured TF2 Tumblr/Twitter would find my article first, but now it's more positive on you and your body of work on there. I'm sorry that the article brought up old wounds, hopefully all misinfo on it is fixed now.

Wow, I actually wasn't sure if I'd get a response. Thank you for being so considerate, for enjoying my fic, and being so understanding. I used the same pseud for years because, well, I'm proud of Respawn of the Dead, warts and all. I don't want to distance myself from it and I'm okay with it being my legacy. Also I'm just absolutely lousy at hiding myself. If I changed my name, people would figure out it's me, so I don't really bother.

If you don't mind, just for the sake of fandom oral history, I'd like to expand upon the period of Medic being a Nazi in fandom. This might be interesting to you as somebody interested in TF2 fandom lore.

Medic being a Nazi was assumed by a lot of fans, due to him fitting a bunch of "Nazi mad scientist" tropes. This remained the case until fans went to Valve's headquarters and straight up asked an employee if he was, to which they were told "no." And then people stopped writing Nazi Medic (for the most part) because it wasn't canon. People still made art but again, we did not know the horrors that the future had in store for us.

It really is wild to think how drastically things have shifted politically online since the late 2000's, when nobody could have predicted that being a Nazi would be anything but the most fringe of fringe, and these people would be regarded as internet sideshows to be gawked at and trolled. Also, Respawn of the Dead was written around the time Inglorious Basterds came out, so there were a lot of sexy Nazis or repentant Nazis in certain fandoms at the time.

There was a TF2 fic, I believe it was called Do No Harm, that legit had Medic working in a concentration camp in a position where he felt like he had to work there or he'd be shot, and he ate human flesh given to him by an evil, Aryan Nazi OC. I don't know if the author distanced herself from the work, because she did re-work it to make it into an original novel that she sold on Amazon. I absolutely could not see anything written like this now that wasn't some kind of dogwhistle, but the author was pretty progressive, actually. So much so we had a fight while I was in my anti-SJW phase and she did not appreciate me bringing up the things she wrote about that emphasized the humanity of a Nazi character, who in all fairness, did deflect in her story. I'm sure she's probably put a lot more distance between herself and that story in the years since, given the way things have gone since Trump's presidency. I wouldn't know, though, since we don't talk, and haven't in nearly a decade.

The person who wrote that is probably forgotten by anybody who wasn't in the fandom at the time, even though she was known for this fic and it was praised almost universally when it was being updated. But she was not the only one doing this. I cannot emphasize enough just how far in the past Nazis felt to us. At the time, being a Nazi was a stupid way of thinking that would never come back outside of attention-hungry edgelords co-opting its imagery, especially in America, an allied nation that loves using Nazis as villains in its media. If you told any of us in 2009 that fascism and white nationalism would make a comeback in America, we would not have believed you unless you were counting neoconservatives and evangelical white Christians as Nazis, and while I think a lot of those people are now pretty much that nowadays, back then it would have been a little bit of a stretch. But the thing is, the white supremacy on an institutional level was always there. We didn't really notice it until it started being pointing out, and at the same time, a bunch of fuckin' white nationalists and neo-Nazis just started popping up all over the place because someone with blue hair and pronouns told them a video game character having her titties out was bad or something. I'm still not entirely sure how that escalated that quickly, but Jesus Christ. It's a shame "clown world" got used mostly by right-wing people online because the label feels pretty apt and also applies to them a lot more. There is something deeply pathetic but also kind of hilarious about filming yourself letting a gas stove burn, or shooting cases of beer to own the libs.

I think most people that used TF2chan are pretty progressive now, a lot of them have come out as some flavor of queer, and the use of "-fag" as a suffix is frowned upon in the official TF2chan Discord server as being incredibly childish and cringey. We were all young adults but clearly we had a lot of growing up to do. I think it is important to point out that a lot of this edgelord shit done at the time, while hurtful and not cool, was done by a lot of people who hadn't figured out who they were yet, and weren't really bad people. Dr. Tanner, who was actually the first person to write a TF2 longfic and beat Respawn of the Dead by at least a few months with the first version of The Lessons (which is gone now), got cited by name in an interview with an old TF2chan user for being really racist, sexist, homophobic and transphobic, only to completely turn around once he came out as trans. I think a lot of this behavior kind of functioned as a shield, because there was still a separation between the internet and real life. Now, there's more people on the internet with less websites people visit, and fandom spaces where everyone is an adult are harder to find. Everything is very politically charged now. The right-wing is further to the right than it was even when I was a teenager and a young adult during Bush's presidency, which given that we got into two forever wars under his administration, is insane to think about. It doesn't feel real, but it is.

So yeah, that's why nobody writes or draws Medic as a Nazi anymore, and that's a good thing. Sorry for the tl;dr.

If you have any questions about old TF2chan and TF2 fandom, I'd be happy to answer them.

[chromatic-lamina]

Hi! You seem quite knowledgeable in this, so I though you might be the right person to ask: I'm trying to find some nice heart pirates fics with them as family doing shenanigans/general stuff. Most of the fics I've found in the Heart Pirates tag in ao3 revolve around a ship involving law and the hearts are just background characters who barely do anything, which isn't what I'm looking for. Do you have any recommendations? (I've already read some of your works, but if you want to recommend those that's good too!)

Platonic Heart Pirates Fics Rec List

Wow! huge compliment.

Yeah, I wouldn't classify myself as a Hearts Pirates writer, but I do write them. I think my best characterisations of them are in my multi-chaptered works, but they're super dark, and the Hearts aren't the focus (but boy do they shine when they get the chance!).

You've probably come across my Bepo's one shots and drabble collection. There's a few shippy pieces in there, but they're clearly marked. Most are just the crew, although focus on the main four. This was also done for the Hearts' Pirates Week, so covers all named crew members (up to that point). This one shot is surprisingly popular: Dark like the North Blue Sea (aka The Sea-Hill you Die On), and you might have come across the Straw Hat and Heart Pirates crews intermingling in this fic featuring Bepo and Chopper. I'm also guessing that you probably saw the piece I wrote for the op summer festival zine: Sun Path Ozoni. An earlier version of that is in Bepo's collection! There's also Bepo's Beptober, which features everyone, but I wouldn't really say explores them in depth!

Okay, RECS!

Any of the fics with the Hearts Pirate tag by @op-sheepy Here's a link to their AO3 dash. There are quite a few Heart Pirate drabbles on their tumblr page too.

@itsxandy 's work, stormy weather, is criminally under-read. That's 22,2221 amazing words on Law's dynamic with the crew in the polar tang in close quarters. Not necessarily happy families, but, oof, it's good. Even a very plausible theory put forward for the recruitment of Clione, I think! Or maybe Uni.

Dragon_in_a_Cypress_swamp has 6 amazing Hearts & Trafalgar Law fics too. Really good (I haven't read all, but what I have read just blows me away).

This is not a place of honor by Hyperbolic Reverie (I'm not guaranteeing that all the fics are sweet). And you've probably come across

the devil knows how to row by fab_ia, is set in Law Novel land, but with flashbacks to Law's time with the Donquixote Family. It's a work in progress. But very good. The author is keats on twitter, and I think one of the guest writers for the up coming Hearts zine. Their AO3 actually has a few Hearts' fics I want to pick through.

Dunno if this counts, but the Scrubs AU with Penguin and Shachi as Law's interns, and Bepo as a trusty nurse is both hilarious and poignant. @thegrimshapeofyoursmile

Cal14's recently been uploading some of their tumblr pieces.

@slashseeker (not getting their blog come up) has some platonic stuff on their AO3 page (their slash is pretty good too though!).

And that's about all I know for now. I'm sure you've read / been pointed towards the big collection: Tales from the Heart.

Almost forgot! If you go through @purplehairedwonder 's page, towards the start of beginning to write OP (so second page), there are about 5 fics that I'd classify as Heart centric, or the Hearts seen through Law's eyes. Not necessarily shenanigans though.

It is a ship fic, and it started before a lot of the Heart Pirates were named, but razbliuto's Methyl Nitrate Pirates really builds character and crew (and it's funny). @fablecore

Hope it helps! Sorry to anyone I've forgotten. Thanks for the ask! Let me know how they go.

Remember all, drop a kudos and comment if the fics strike your fancy❤️ Makes a Heart Pirates Heart loving Heart beat heartier.

[laminy]

I wrote this awhile ago (thanks to @mccorky for the idea) and then figured I should post it today in honour of Brian’s birthday :)

“Whoa!” Sami hops and down and then runs into the storage room, almost immediately disappearing behind a stack of boxes. “There’s so much stuff in here!”

“There is,” Ben says, and then he looks at Brian. “Sorry, no offence.”

“None taken,” Brian says. “There certainly is. I don’t throw anything away.”

“Be careful, habibi,” Rami says, shifting Rosemary in his arms. “Don’t knock anything over.”

“I won’t!��

“So much stuff,” Joe says under his breath. “We gotta get Ben to open a museum for you, Brian,” he says, clapping him on the back. “We can turn all of this into an exhibit.”

“I don’t think that’s necessary,” Brian says. “But you’re welcome to whatever books or anything else that you can find.” That’s why they’d come here in the first place; Brian had mentioned old books that he had packed away, and both Sami and Gwil had perked right up at the thought of getting to read something cool and old. Of course Ben and Rami were on board too. Joe was mostly there for the company.

“Papa, come look!” Sami exclaims from somewhere, hidden in the depths of the storage room.

“Okay, coming,” Joe says, and he smiles at the others before he heads in.

“As much stuff as it is,” Brian says, “everything should be clearly labeled. Dig in.”

“I know I will,” Gwil says, and he heads over to look at a box of magazines. “Anything I still haven’t caught up on—”

“You will find it in here,” Brian says. He looks at Rami and snaps his fingers. “I know I’ve got some old mystery novels.”

“Well, I certainly won’t say no,” Rami says. “Will we, Rosie? No, we won’t.” He kisses her cheek and follows Brian.

“Really though,” Ben says, looking around. “What are you going to do with all this?”

“What we’re doing now,” Brian says. “Take what you want.”

“Sure,” Ben says. “Let me see what I can find.” He joins Rami and Rosemary. Rami’s sorting through the books, creating two piles, presumably one to take and one to leave. One pile is already noticeable larger than the other, and knowing Rami, Ben assumes that’s the one to take.

“Careful, Bear,” Joe says from the corner. “That thing’s bigger than you.”

“Ugh, it’s not a bug, is it?” Rami asks.

“Look at this!” Sami exclaims, and they all look towards him— or the sound of him. It takes a few more seconds before he actually comes into view from behind all the boxes, awkwardly carrying a guitar. Well, half-carrying it. Joe’s got a hand on it as well, just in case Sami drops it.

“Careful,” Joe says again. “Got it?” He still doesn’t take his hand off, though.

“Look at that,” Gwil says, pushing his glasses up. “Whose is that?”

“Mine, of course.”

“Look at that, Rosie,” Rami says. “Isn’t that nice.”

“That’s posh,” Ben says. “Did you play?”

“Oh, years ago,” Brian says. “Why do you think this is in storage?”

“Let Brian see it,” Joe says.

“Oh, he can hold it,” Brian says. “Sit down, I’ll show you how.” There’s a fairly sturdy box that can hold Sami’s weight, so he sits down and holds the guitar in his arms. “Wow, who taught how to hold a guitar?”

“I see it on the computer,” Sami says. “Oh, and Papa’s music.”

“Right on,” Brian says. He crouches down in front of Sami. “Now, I’m right-handed, so this is a right-handed guitar. If you were going to play— well, since you’re left-handed, you’d have to decide how you wanted to play it. That’s a big decision.”

“There are different hands for guitars?” Sami asks.

“There are,” Brian says. “So, you could play a left-handed guitar. Or a right-handed guitar. Or a right-handed guitar strung upside down.”

“I don’t know what that means,” Sami says, and Brian chuckles.

“We’ll hold it like a right-handed guitar for now,” Brian says. “It’s just for fun. Then do you know what to do?”

“Like this,” Sami says, and he strums the strings a couple times.

“Brilliant,” Ben says.

“Here.” Brian gently guides Sami’s fingers into position, and holds them into place. “Now strum. There we go. And now this one, let’s try E minor.”

“That’s cool,” Sami says. “But it hurts my fingers.”

“Your hands are pretty small, Bear,” Joe says. “And that’s a grown-up guitar.”

“Maybe Brian should show us something then,” Gwil says. “See how it’s done.”

“Yeah!” Sami says enthusiastically. “Will you?”

“Oh, it’s been awhile,” Brian says.

“Please?” Sami asks. “Just one thing.”

Brian smiles at him. “Alright, let me see.” He takes the guitar from Sami and stands up straight. “Any requests?”

“Wonderwall?” Joe asks, and Ben grins. Even though he was joking, Brian starts playing it with ease.

“Wow, that’s good,” Rami says.

“I like it,” Sami says.

“You can do something harder,” Joe says.

“Oh, probably,” Brian says, and he starts playing Fleetwood Mac, quickly picking at the strings.

“Oh wow,” Rami says, gently rubbing Rosemary’s back. “Sami, look at that.”

“He’s good,” Sami says.

“You didn’t tell us you were a rockstar,” Joe says.

“Just for fun,” Brian says, and he hands the guitar back to Sami. “You can have it, if you want.”

“We can’t take that,” Rami says.

“Well, I’ll just hold onto it for you then,” Brian says. “Until you grow into it.”

“What sorts of music did you play?” Gwil asks.

“Were you in a band?” Ben asks.

“Let me look,” Brian says, and he goes off in search for one of the many boxes.

“Take her, would you?” Rami asks, handing Rosemary over to Joe. “I need to get a better look at these books.”

“Geez, babe, how many are you taking?”

“I can put them in the Little Library once I’m done with them.”

“Hmm.” Joe gently bounces Rosemary up and down in his arms. “Aren’t you going to have some fun bedtime stories, Bug.”

“Here we go,” Brian says, and he hands a scrapbook over to Gwil. Ben leans against Gwil’s arm, and watches him flip through old photos of Brian and his friends.

“You look so cool,” Ben says.

“Your hair hasn’t changed,” Gwil says, and he looks up at Brian with a smile.

“Of course not,” Brian says. “Why mess with perfection?”

“Hmm, fair enough,” Gwil murmurs, and Ben grins.

Sami keeps examining the guitar, and strums the strings a few more times. “Brian? Can you show me some more? Please?”

“Duty calls, lads,” Brian says, and he pats Ben on the arm as he walks by. “Feel free to keep looking.”

“Oh, we definitely will,” Gwil says, and he nudges Ben before flipping through the next page.

“Wow, look at those trousers,” Ben says.

“Tight.”

“Very.”

Joe hurries over. “Let me see?”

Ben tries not laugh, but he tilts the scrapbook towards him anyway.

“Oh, very nice.”

[jamesunderwater]

okay okay okay okay read on if you want the latest shenanigans of me and the best friend.

pls enjoy a somewhat redacted version of our texts from last night, that culminate in him being the CUTEST, he's literally becoming a marauders fan bc he's my beta for dead to me. all he's ever done is read hp in his early 20s, like a few weeks ago he couldn't remember "who the werewolf was." let me tell YOU, someone actually getting into fandom stuff for your favorite fandom just cause they love you and read your fanfiction for you?????? is?????? THE NICEST CUTEST MOST ATTRACTIVE THING EVER especially if you're autistic. okay rant over please enjoy:

Me: 1. i'm not even tired fml 2. [insert me being anxious about ppl donating for my top surgery, asking for reassurance] 3. Hi idk sorry to be texting you like literally 20 minutes after leaving you 4. i hope you're magically already asleep this is so embarrassing chuck shut uppppp Him: 1. omg i'm so sorry :/ me neither i'm eating rice cakes 2. [insert reassurance and a question abt the donations] 3. you are so fine! omg I wrote out this text and then got self conscious because I wanted to text you something meaningless like right after you left lol: [insert him telling me something silly and cute about his nighttime routine] 4. Up town for REAL Me: 1. [lala st about being in bed] 2. [lala st about donations] 3. okay i feel so much better 💖 and for the record I always love to hear from you and I want all the fun facts. [lala st about his nighttime routine] 4. Are you telling me to shut up? Him: 1. [lala] 2. [lala reassurance lala] 3. 💖!! Love to share love to hear 4. No you GOON, I meant up as in "im awake"! But I see how that came off... Me: 1. 2. 3. 4. Wow so now you want me to shut up AND you're name calling?! Didn't know you could be so cruel, Jacobson Him: 4. Ok I really read that with my last name and all in Sirius Black's voice Me: 4. You read it correctly then Him: 4. !!!!! Me: 4. b. Good to know you have a voice for Sirius Black in your head......almost like you're a marauders fan Him: 4. c. Almost like this literal spectacular novel writer has gotten my mind into having actual personal thoughts/feelings about the marauders moment...feels sinister on his part idk 4. d. (I won't deny what you're saying tho...) Me: 4. e. !!!!!!!!!! 👀👀👀 call me Dr. Frankenstein cause I've created a monster Him: For real!! ✨👹✨ Me: a marauders monster if you will

[cishetamine]

the worst person in the world (2021) letterboxd review (already crossposted this to twt but reposting here for………'research'[you'll see)]

funny how i originally thought this movie was adapted from a novel even BEFORE a major character contracted a terminal illness (aka like one of the most common things that can happen to a character in a Realistic Fiction Novel, right after infidelity). it just has that MFA vibe!

this movie feels like a deceptive advertisement for living in norway. isn't it mostly cold there ? (update: i have looked up the average winter monthly temperatures in oslo & theyre actually pretty much the same as where i live. whooops!!)

the music in this is good when it’s good & rly annoying when it’s not

hilarious and insane that norway’s indie comics scene is (or is at least depicted as being) exactly the same as in the US—i.e., dominated by edgy cishet dudes all too willing to use mere shock factor as an excuse for originality

like…he has characters whose names are translated as “Dick Wolf Dick” & “Pedo the Parrot” which, come ON but also that literally is what these guys are like……like. So true besty

& yet ! i also can't help but sympathize w/ the comic boyfriend re: the Great Endless Cancel Culture Debate bc ppl have also told me stuff like, “i hate all the people in your comics”

which like! Fair, i don't intend for my characters to be Nice People (well ok some of them are well-intentioned but also kinda hopeless/lost causes)

but also the bf (well, ex-bf—in more ways than 1!!) is exactly right—comics are where i put all the horrible thoughts in my brain that i can’t exorcize by any other means!

love that she shares my hobby of “lying to strangers at parties”……she’s so cool

this movie has a lot of fun little moments that feel pointily realistic: (e.g.: getting interrupted repeatedly while fooling around w/ someone at a party bc you’ve decided to canoodle one another in the Designated Bed Where Everyone Puts Their {Admittedly Extremely Soft + Sensual} Coats, and now everyone is coming to get their jackets & keeps walking in on u while you're trying to snog)

^ another such moment: when her dad says that the link to the libfem girlpower-vibes sex article she wrote doesn’t work, & it’s up to us to decide if there’s actually an issue with his phone or he was just being squeamish abt sex

i wouldn’t call these "wow just like irl lmao" moments exactly the same as the ones in a coen bros movie, but they’re similar imo ? like, those are always my favorite things abt their films (the violence is fine but usually kind of boring to me at this point. like, okay, he has a gun, great. can we bring back the wood chipper? no, too expensive? well how about the cattle stunner thingy, do you still have that thingamajig laying around?)

nah i'm talking like, the way they make the pauses in an ordinary conversation as awkwardly real as possible. ofc when they do it it's often bc there's some sort of double entendre[not necessarily sexual] going on, like w/ the confusion re: the kidnapping in fargo or the student trying to cheat in a serious man. but lebowski has a lot of fun realistic conversationy stuff that's just plain weird, which i guess i'm comparing this more to?

wait. Holy shit. is it at all true that “most women don’t like giving blowjobs”!?!?!?!? Like What the FUCK. is this a straight vs gay thing??? i don’t get it……what could turn u on more than being good at making yr partner cum??? (ok well i can think of several things actually but literally why are u having sex w/ someone unless it’s mutually enjoyable i——???? honestly this was maybe the least believable part of the movie 4 me :// can straight women PLEASE weigh in on thisPLEAAAASEEEEE!!!!!!)

re: “they’ve housebroken bobcat” I HAVE TO KNOW whether the bit abt removing the cartoon cat’s butthole was in response to CATS (2019).

this movie feels like propaganda from the norwegian board of tourism. case in point: basically all of the action happens in summer. also, that scene where she runs outside and the world is frozen in time feels kinda like an ad. sorry if my brain has been broken by america superb owl commercial culture :(

it’s fascinating to see a film that’s so contemporary & relatable but also not quite my own life??? kinda like the gaggle of cishet-presenting girls i saw on the train recently—bc i was aware of most of the celebrity gossip & news stuff they were talking abt, but i still came away feeling like i inhabit a very different—albeit parallel—world from them. for more context, here is my best try at a transcript of their convo: www.tumblr.com/cishetamine/701574180800479232/lily-rose-depp-they-were-calling-her-a-nepo

(p.s. please don't get mad at me for snooping on strangers, i'm just one of many credulous clods who once heard that u can get better at writing by transcribing how ppl really talk. & from there i got obsessed w/ doing this whenever someone is having an interesting convo near me. also most importantly, i didn't write down any personally identifying info & also these ppl are totally anonymous anyway. so plz enjoy @ yr leisure!)

love how this dude reminisces abt being a Record Store / Video Store / Comic Store guy !!! i.e., he’s an alt bro!!! love that for him. it's so cute that norway has hipsters too<3 squee!

also luv how "i just took a dna test turns out / i'm 3.1% sami" is the norwegian equivalent of “my great grandmother was a cherokee princess” cosplaying indigeneity

^ overall tho, the extinction rebellion-core gf feels kinda way too flat & one-note……but also i literally know ppl who are like that!! like i've had friends who were into radical veganism + environmentalism & it did seem kind of culty……which is not to say that ppl shouldn't be vegan or environmentalist, of course! but i have absolutely seen it turn into Unhealthy Polycule Drama & we've just seen where that leads, cough FTX / EAs, cough

no but it’s fascinating how this depiction of norwegian ~radical~ environmentalism compares to the scene in the US. for instance i feel like i’ve never heard an american state that they chose not to fly across the ocean bc it would increase their carbon footpri——wait no actually yes i have heard this, but specifically in the context of academic conferences, never like, regarding travel for fun. Interesting difference here!

(^ also, those were basically only professors on twitter who were saying that, not ppl i know in real life. so another level of remove from me)

[meanwhile i would chop off one of my less-important fingers in exchange for being able to fly across the ocean, environment be damned] [anyway tbh i figure it wouldn’t be thaaaaaat evil so long as i was able to stay in that other country for at least several months, as opposed to business travelers who frequently fly back & forth. but i would want to stay bc i would be desperate to learn the language!

which language, you ask? why, my answer is—Yes!]

anyway enough feeling sorry for myself for not being rich. time to feel sorry for imaginary movie ppl instead!

“i don’t want to be the sensible choice while she’s the sexy one” damn that makes a lot of sense! i definitely feel that re: pressure to be Exciting & Spontaneous & Ever-Flexible so that ppl will find u attractive / alluring instead of setting boundaries (given the choice between setting a boundary vs having sex with someone hot, i will almost always choose the latte——ah, but you see, posting this in a public forum where people i've had sex with can read it is itself an act of performati——

So about the main character. We don’t get much interiority of her, like aside from the stuff at the beginning abt her various major + career changes, we don't get to hear directly the thoughts she is thinking—not just bc we don't hear much in the way of interior monologue, but also bc she doesn't explain herself to the ppl around her.

like, she didn't tell her then-bf that there was in fact another guy—which like, honestly, if i were in her situation, i might also take the coward's route! especially if she feared jealous retribution from her current bf. but we don't know if she fears that, bc we never see her talk to her FRIENDS, bc for all we know, she doesn't have any!!!!

which feels very……hard for me to believe? bc i have never met a woman who did not have Friends. (& supposedly guys tend to have fewer pals, but even they usually seem to at least have like, Gamer Buds, idk! i know i always did back when i was a Gamer in high school, even if i was kinda withdrawn irl.)

so i'm left wondering—are we supposed to see her as genuinely friendless? & if so, what does that say abt her?

or are we just supposed to assume that the movie doesn't want to show her friends? if that's the case, why would it make that decision??

if we as viewers are supposed to actually believe that she doesn't have friends that she can confide in whom she is not romantically involved with……it rly paints a very specific (& melancholy!) picture of her as a person. bc that's a stereotype i mostly associate w/ Isolated Guys, but yet she is not that! (i would like to be her friend & talk abt photography..)

still not sure how i feel abt the freeze-time gimmick. Like on the 1 hand—it’s giving crazy ex girlfriend tv show. But also………idk it looks kinda cool regardless!

between this & tár, i feel sooo…………something abt watching 2 movies in a short timespan that contain Bitingly Contemporary Cancellation Scenes, & also cell phones………i………hmm.

thinking abt gretchen from twitter, a noble woman fighting for a just cause (telling adult YA fans to get a life), yet whose ratioing ultimately feels sorta pyrrhic to me, such that i have to wonder if it's worth the stress it presumably causes her.

but also, i am much more of a wimp than many people! for instance, a lot of ppl are strong tough athletes who put themselves thru a lot of pain because they find it enjoyable overall! whereas personally i only do exercise when i can convince myself that it's fun (e.g., biking places, swimming in water that isn't freezing cold)

so what i'm saying is perhaps gretchen sees being a Culture Warrior as a noble pursuit &/or lives for the thrill of the takedown, whereas i'm probably conflict-averse to a fault. (also, on a materialist level, she gets plenty of publicity for fighting the good fight—& as an author, building an audience is pretty crucial to keeping the lights on!)

anyway, right—the reason i'm thinking abt her at all in the context of this film is bc of the Cancel Culture Scene. bc i'm sympathetic to both the comics artist himself as well as his critics—bc like gretchen & her supporters always say, i believe artists have the right to be messy & sexual & graphic & painful & problematic & difficult to untangle……both bc i prefer to consume art (like this movie!) that fits that description, & bc that's ultimately the kind of work i would like to create.

but what's weird abt the tv interview in the gym in this movie is that we don't really even get to see exactly what the feminists debating the comics boyfriend are actually mad at him about. it's all vague—probably bc the point isn't the debate itself so much as its effect on his ex-gf! (& we know this bc the camera spends hella time tracking her facial reactions throughout this scene, as opposed to focusing primarily on the ex-boyfriend being interviewed.)

(btw for the record, i've read some of gretchen's writing but not a huge amount, & i think she's quite talented at describing compelling visual scenes, but i do worry that some of her political commentary is just so on-the-nose that it isn't as funny as it wants to be?

like, sure, i hate raytheon tenderqueers as much as any Good Leftoid! obviously imperialist militaries are evil & should be systematically dismantled, & it's sickening seeing the cynical liberal war machine attempt to suck us gays into its awful whirling gears.

but—as we saw with countless lib comedians attempting to parody trump—just bc you're making fun of something genuinely bad, doesn't mean your jokes are automagically hilarious!)

oh right, i was building toward something—namely: it feels like there's 3 sides in the big Cancel Culture Debate these days:

(mostly but not solely) christian right-wingers who hate the gays

young people who ummm [takes a full minute to check something on my phone] believe barnes & noble should sort books by tone indicator & who think fujoshis will trigger the third impact

cool edgy trans ppl caught in the middle of these 2 groups, martyred like that one saint mishima used to jack off to & permitted to do any crime so long as it is judged as being sufficiently badass by the Council of Trans Elders

anyway i was just gonna say: you know how sun tzu art of war has that thing abt how u should make your enemies fight each other instead of u fighting on 2 sides at once?

yeah, i think we should come up with a new discourse designed to do exactly that. or maybe get the evangelicals & catholics to fight again over whether asexual priests are valid or if they have to be volcel to really count. hopefully they'll wear themselves out, & our[if i may be so bold as to number myself among the Edgy Trans] troops of keyboard warriors will be able to reenter the fray refreshed to fight another day!

[thephoenixandthecrocodile]

Hello! I’m interested in reading Uzbek literature and just came across an old post of yours, so I hope it’s okay I’m barging into your ask box to ask questions! 😅 I coincidentally went to two museum exhibitions in Paris about Uzbekistan, and now I need to Read Books About It. I am particularly interested in anything pre-1920s, and I came across Days Gone By by Abdulla Qodiriy. I struggled to find a comprehensive summary that didn’t spoil the story, so I wanted to ask if it’s a good book that depicts pre-Russian (or at least pre-Stalinist) Uzbek culture? I would be super grateful for any other recommendations. Did Hamid Ismailov write anything that’s set pre 1920s? Anyway, please feel free to only answer as much or as little as you’re in the mood for, sorry to bother you!! 💕

Oh wow thank you so much for this ask! I love talking about Central Asian literature. I will confess that most of the books I've read so far deal with Central Asian life either during or after the Soviet Union and that is a bias reflective of my time period of interest (Central Asia during WWI and the Russian Civil War) and the fact that I only read and speak English and most of the books translated into English are either Soviet or post-Soviet literature. So my recommends are in no way exhaustive, but they should be a good place to start your journey.

The first book I'd recommend is Days Gone By by Abdulla Qodiriy. it's set in the 1800s, so the Russians haven't fully colonized the region yet, but they have taken a lot of land in the Steppe and relations with the khans are growing tense. It takes place in Turkestan and is about Atabek, a wealthy merchant, and the love of his life, Kumush, and the many struggles they face to be together. It's a fascinating read as it gives great insight into life before 1920 and how the Jadid's felt about women's rights and issues. I'm not sure what is your preferred language, but there are two English translations. One by Carol Ermakova, which is the one I read and enjoyed and one by Mark Reese, which I haven't read yet, but I got to speak to him about translating the book and I really liked his passion for the story and Central Asia.

The other book I'd recommend is Night by Cho'lpon (which I actually like better than Days Gone By, but don't tell anyone ;)). It's set in the 1900s, so much later than Days Gone By, but before the Russian Revolution or WWI. It's about a young woman who is married to an official who is also a sexual glutton and the chaos it causes in his household. Even though it is a Tsarist Central Asia, the focus is on the Central Asian people and life in Central Asia and again it provides an interesting look at how the Jadids felt about women's rights and the issues they faced (and Cho'lpon gets to poke some fun at the Jadids themselves which is fascinating). Christopher Fort did a masterful job with the translation and provided an phenomenal introduction that explores Cho'lpon's life and provides a great analysis of the novel itself.

If you like poetry, I'd also recommend the book 12 Ghazals by Alisher Navoiy and 14 Poems by Abdulhamid Cho'lpon. The poems were translated by Andrew Staniland, Aidakhon Bumatova, and Avazkhon Khaydarov. Navoiy was a poet who write in the 1400s and is considered a father of Central Asian poetry. Cho'lpon, of course, is the father of modern Central Asian poetry.

Actually, Staniland just came out with another poetry collection I haven't read it (but i've just ordered it). It's called Nodira and Uvaysiy: Selected Poems. Nodira was a Central Asian Queen in the 1800s famous for her poetry and Uvaysiy was a woman poet who lived in the palace with Nodira.

For a more contemporary writer, Hamid Ismailov wrote two books that deal with multiple timelines, including a pre-1920 Central Asia. The first book of his I'd recommend is one of my favorites. It's called The Devils' Dance and it is about the last days of Abdulla Qodiriy, Cho'lpon, and Abdurauf Fitrat, as well as Central Asia during the Great Game. It follows the fate of Emir Nasrullah and Madali's Khanates as the Russians and British start to infiltrate the region (the connection between the two story lines is that Qodiriy, in real life and in Hamid's book, was working on a novel about Madali's wife: Oyxon before Qodiriy was arrested and murdered by the Soviets). Actually, Nodira and Uvaysiy, who I mentioned above, play a prominent role in this book as well.

Hamid also wrote a book called Of Strangers and Bees. it's about a modern day Central Asian expat and his connection with a charming bee and the famous physician Ibn Sina. It jumps from the 1000s Central Asia with Ibn Sina and modern day with the expat. I'll admit I've had to reread this book many times because it borrows heavily from Sufism and there are a lot of references that I'm still trying to catch and understand simply because I'm not as familiar with Sufism as I'd like to be.

A little bit of an aside, but Tilted Axis Press, who published both the Devils' Dance and Of Strangers and Bees is a great press that focuses on translating books from the Global South into English and they have a great catalog of Central Asian and South Asian Writers, so definitely check out their entire catalog as well.

Finally, i have to recommend Amanat, even though the stories are set far beyond your interested time frame (most of them are either soviet or post soviet era Central Asia and Russia). The reason I recommend it is because it's the first and only anthology of all Kazakh women writers and it was published just last year, so it needs all the support we can give it. It's also a great look at life in Central Asia as a Kazakh woman.

I hope this was helpful and please keep in touch. I'd love to hear your thoughts as you engage with Central Asian literature. ^_^

[bardofavon]

🕯️🍬🦷

this is so long for no reason, I’m sooo sorry.

🕯️ ⇢ on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? why is that?

probably a 6???? on the bright side, editing means the WRITING part is done!! because I never edit while I write, I always save it for after. on the other hand…I was never great with editing fic before my longfic because I get impatient and just want to post it. I want everyone to read and validate what I wrote and I don't want to sit on it for long. now that i've written a LOT (going into a manic state and writing 30k in one weekend for example) and can still update weekly gives me a lot of time to reread and tweak future stuff I've written while still putting out work for people to engage with and that makes the edting less of a slog.

I grew to enjoy editing a lot after I finished my first novel because I'd spent all that time creating the world and the story and the editing phase gave me some time where I could just….live in it, I guess? Read it again and again and figure out what works and what doesn't work, have people read it and give feedback and change it again, figure out what works and what doesn't work for different characters, talk to the characters etc. without feeling the crunch of needing to finish writing the actual story. But it's not higher than a 6 out of 10 because really, writing is the most fun of writing for me. Or having written. I love actually writing it, and I love when it's finished and ready for people to engage with. Editing is that grey area where people can't really see it and enjoy it yet but I’m done thinking up deranged ideas and watching them play out.

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

you want me to get drawn and quartered don’t you? you want me to be hated by the masses? idk I feel like a lot of my opinions are unpopular. I'm not very present in the fandom that I write for (on purpose) because I actually try my hardest to not know what the fandom opinion's are, if I have questions about something I try and just look for answers in the text.

but I feel like based on how much has breached containment that when I say “no one gets him like I do” about the darkling I say it with my full chest. he’s so much worse than apologists make him out to be but also wouldn't/doesn't do have the shit antis say he would or does. I do think he's a bit unredeemable but not because he can't be redeemed, but because he refuses to be redeemed. he's satan from paradise lost, to me. the problem isn't that he can't seek redemption but that he doesn't think he needs it and won't accept the truth of a reality in which he’s in the wrong. i think he'll commit any and every atrocity but he needs to have a reason for it. his violence might seem senseless but it's not to him. he's terrible but he's also one of the most interesting characters and the two things can coexist. I actually think leigh handled him really well.

🦷 ⇢ share some personal wisdom or a life hack you swear on

okay general personal wisdom, i've been writing almost daily for 17 years and posting my writing publicly online for the last 13 years but it wasn’t until 5 years ago that I ever wrote something and read it and went “wow, this is actually really really good” so really just keep going??? if you write something and it's not good that's okay, just keep writing and someday you'll read something you wrote and go “this is one of my favorite things to read now and it came from my hands” BUT ALSO I was rereading my old middle school fanfiction and I made HUGE improvements in the course of a year when I first started posting just by stretching myself to put out work regularly and writing a bunch every day and getting regular criticism on my work/spending lots of time getting better. no one is born being a good writer, it takes work like any other craft. it's okay. you just have to write a bunch of mediocre stuff first and then you'll be better someday with practice. if you want to be, I mean. but just looking at someone and going “wow they're a great writer I wish I was that skilled” they actually probably spent thousands of hours working at it! you too can do that someday with patience and hard work and putting out a lot of work you AREN'T proud of first! but you still have to put it out!

anyway more practical writing life hacks/tips: write the scenes you're most excited about first. you don't have to push through writing things you don't want to write to get to the stuff you do want to write, these are all fake rules you're making yourself. if you have a scene you're obsessed with that you want to get on the page just skip to it and write it?? and then write what builds up to it. I have never once written chronologically in my life. and you know what?? that makes it easier to sprinkle in foreshadowing using specific lines you want to call back to because you wrote them in a different order, lol. god has no concept of time, he's outside of it and as the author so are you. if you're excited to write something the readers can tell.

also most writing advice people give is actually just the surefire way to make someone look like an amateur. “said is dead” go fuck yourself, actually, because it is not. trying too hard to make your work sound “good” by using perfect grammar/”creative” word choices/avoiding overusing words actually just makes it sound like it's trying too hard and pulls ppl out of the writing by drawing attention to words that would otherwise be invisible because the purpose they serve is utilitarian. especially if you're writing from a limited perspective or first person POV, it’s not always about what words sound the best as much as it is about what words your character would actually use or know.

also taking the time to actually study writing dialogue and drilling/practicing dialogue is huge, good dialogue can make or break a story. when i was in middle school someone commented to tell me my dialogue made my story unreadably bad and i became fixated on improving that part of my writing and now it's one of my strengths, so yeah just study up.

put all the songs that make you think of your story on a playlist and listen to it when you feel uninspired. think about your story all the time throughout your daily life. daydream about it. hang out with it. writing is hard if you're only writing when you're writing. it's easier if you’re thinking about your writing often and the “writing time” is when you get around to typing it out.

there's no real rules, do whatever you want just as long as you do it often. if it's not good that’s okay you'll write something that is or rewrite it better someday. if you can't figure out how to start the story just don't start it, write the middle and now that's your beginning now. if you overuse a word too bad, that word is your family now and you don't walk out on family. that's it.

truth or dare asks for writers

[waitingonavision]

I crave more modern AU encanto madness😭😭😭💕💕 and your hcs for it were SO SPOT ON. branching off of the social media ask, what do you think each of them would have in their bios? + who would they be following 👀👀👀💕

Aw, thanks!! T^T And oh wow, this one's gonna be fun...

Also: just imagine their bios are in Spanish.

Alma

Bio/description: Her name and nothing more, she’s got no time for that

Following: family members***; accounts that focus on photos taken around Colombia; oh, but also whatever accounts they’ve made for their hobbies, etc. (e.g., Mirabel’s crafts). I imagine someone helped her choose an account that posts about grief and stuff too.

*** “following family members” is the default for everyone.

Julieta

Bio/description: A mamá who heals with her love, and lots of food.

Following: Local restaurants’ accounts, chefs (but not too many celebrity chefs), medical/medicine-related accounts

Pepa

Bio/description: Your freaking weather goddess 🌦⛈ and honorary Wine Aunt 🍷

Following: Favorite authors, potential romantic getaway spots, some kind of animal facts account that she can share with Antonio

Bruno

Bio/description: It’s actually me. But sometimes it’s Hernando or Jorge. Hi 👋🏽

Following: Various rat instas; his favorite writers, artists, and telenovela actors; a few food accounts

Agustín

Bio/description: It either somehow just says “description” or he’s attempted to write an autobiographical novel

Following: A lot of the same accounts Julieta follows; also the Spanish equivalent of stonkexchange for some reason (he doesn’t get the memes but laughs anyway)

Félix

Bio/description: Married to a freaking (weather) goddess. Father of three stunning children. WEPA! 🇨🇴

Following: Okay, so Félix definitely used to have an account on Duolingo in order to mess with Agustín. He’d troll him in the leaderboards by letting him get ahead and then outranking him by a hundred or so points (and so on and so on)

Isabela

Bio/description: Sick of pretty. Always finding out ✨what else✨ I can do! ‘Find’ me on Etsy @ LasFloresDeIsabela

Following: She and Lizzo are probably mutuals. Also, she, Dolores, and Mirabel all hype one another and their endeavors up

Dolores

Bio/description: Afro-Latina. Romantic. Listens more than she speaks 

Following: Poetry and writing accounts; her favorite artists (music, etc.), especially other Afro-Latinx artists; natural hair stylists

Luisa

Bio/description: (Mirabel wrote hers) Hi!!! I’m Luisa (she/her). I love my family and helping people, and like to stay super, super fit! I’m sorry, but I can’t accept requests for assistance via DM. Photos of puppies are always welcome, though!

Following: accounts that post about dogs, dog photos, etc. (e.g. Thoughts of Dog but in Spanish); fitness and weight training accounts; accounts that post affirmations and positivity (quotes and things)

Camilo

Bio/description: Making you laugh with my jokes and impressions and cry over my beauty and voice 🎭

Following: Trinidad Cardona and other singers; actors, comedians, films/theatre accounts; food accounts; he once made a fake account for either Isabela or Dolores. His parents put a stop to that real quick (the girls teamed up to get back at him)

Mirabel

Bio/description: Quiubo! I’m Mirabel (she/her), 15, Colombiana 🇨🇴 Blogs about Colombia, my tío’s rat telenovelas, sewing and DIY crafts, magical realism, animals, and other things

Following: sewing and craft accounts, all of her interests listed above; probably fandom stuff too

Antonio

Not on social media

Thank you for the ask, @mmollymercury​! I hope I did alright 💚

[olderthannetfic]

I mean there are issues within m/m fanfiction, the problem is the arguments we see take things to the extreme. Either there's no issues and it's just women exploring their sexuality and how dare you mock the things women like! OR It's homophobic how dare straight women fetishize gay men! When in reality there are tropes and trends that do lean more towards homophobia or heteronormativity but there's no space for us (slash fans) to call that out without having to defend against the extremes.

--

This is so hilariously moderate that I think everyone would agree with it if they take it at surface value and don't read into your words.

Anyone who is a veteran of decades of fannish debate will read into your words.

The basic issue is that the conversation people typically want to have about things that are homophobic or heteronormative is pretty 101. They're coming to this fresh with great earnestness, but to someone like me, it's just going to sound like sealioning because we've had these same arguments in slash fandom and in queer communities going back decades.

For example, here are the standard Not Queer Enough bad things that make us just like the breeders according to 80s/90s queer community wank:

marriage

raising children

monogamy

roles of any kind including butch/femme

99% of A/B/O Is Just Het Tho or BL Is Bad Because Ukes wank sounds like all of this over again.

And then there's the eternal fight about whether Pride is for kink and adults and free expression of sexuality or whether it's for corporations and kids in strollers. Conform and kick your less acceptable members to the curb as a political strategy to get rights or be inclusive punk rebels but make fewer strides in legislation? It's a legitimate and eternal struggle in minority groups.

The obsession with Good Representation™ is part of this. So is not liking stuff that overlaps your group with kink and socially unacceptable sexual fantasies. In other words...

RESPECTABILITY POLITICS

.

If somebody sends me an example of a specific fic or trend they think sucks, I'll keep an open mind...

But I can tell you I have yet to hear an argument about any actual fic on AO3 that made me agree it was homophobic or heteronormative rather than just standard porn bullshit that the lizard brain loves.

People are always wringing their hands about shit that is super common in romance novels and erotica and live action pornos alike because audiences love it.

So for example, I really hope nobody expects me to take seriously an argument about m/m fanfic being bad for any of:

penetration = real sex, all other sex = foreplay

virginity is real and matters

ravishment

biology works how is hot and/or convenient to the plot

everyone has a giant dick

safe sex is boring and we're going to pretend STDs don't exist

everyone is a giant nympho slut

everyone is unrealistically monogamous

dick so good it converted someone

kink with zero negotiation first

zero realistic psychological consequences for anything

etc.

Someone's going to go, "Okay, okay, not literally always, but you have to agree that sometimes this trope is bad. Or it's bad that it's like 99% of fics."

No.

No I don't.

At zero times do I agree that it's a problem all porn does the dumb penetration=real sex thing. Yes, it's dumb. Yes, it's unrealistic. It's there because it's hot. If you find it un-hot, write something else.

I'm totally down to have a conversation about which trends are stupid or boring, but homophobic? Heteronormative? LOL.

Fundamentally, every single conversation about problems in m/m fanfic on AO3 starts from the assumption that fic should be looked at from a reader's perspective. This is the reader's whole media diet. They learn queerness from fic. They learn sex ed and biology from fic. They don't have access to other queer media. They're learning the wrong messages. Blah blah blah.

I look at fic as more like someone's porn (or the emotions equivalent) they wrote for themselves in their diary and were nice enough to let others see as a favor. Sure, occasionally, I think "Wow, author, I am so sorry for you that you view bodies and sex this way", but even then, how do I know it's not just that they're a bad writer? The only thing I'm learning from their fic is that some very weird stuff makes me horny. If I have trouble putting that fic in a wider context of realistic queerness or non-fanfic erotica or whatever else, that's my problem, not the writer's.

The only "problem" with m/m fanfiction on AO3 is that I cannot find any first time sex pollen RM/JK A/B/O where they're both alphas and JK is on the bottom and RM feels comedic levels of melodramatic guilt over it while JK's entire internal monologue is just the word "thighs" over and over and over.

[bi-bard]

Please Say That You're Joking (Pt.1) - Chuck Shurley Imagine (Supernatural)

Title: Please Say You're Joking (Pt. 1) [You can read part 2 by clicking here!]

Pairing: Chuck Shurley X Winchester!Reader

Requested: Nope

Word Count: 2,930 words

Warning(s): mentions of sex, threats of violence

Summary: (Season 4; Season 11) (Y/n) had a single one-night stand while coping with loss in a not healthy way... if only they had a clue about the weight of their actions.

Author's Note: I was recently going back through some of the "lighter" episodes of Supernatural because I wanted to watch something I could chuckle at. That's where this came from.

This might be the most crackheaded thing I've written in a while.

Also, the amount of things I had to bullshit my way through this is actually ridiculous.

Hey! I did a rewrite of the ending of Supernatural. It took a really long time to complete, so it would mean a lot to me if you check it out. Here’s a link! (it’s on my personal account)

-------------------------------------

Sam, Dean, and I walked into the motel room. We were all confused and slightly scared.

We had gone to a comic book shop to do some work on a case. However, we were then called fans.

Fans of what?

Well, fans of a series of books about our lives.

I was the middle Winchester child. Two years younger than Dean, two years older than Sam. I was beyond confused when I saw some weird, romanticized version of me on the cover of a book.

"This is so weird," I mumbled, plopping onto one of the beds in the room.

Sam jumped onto his laptop and started researching. Dean was holding one of the books, reading through it. I didn't even want to touch it.

"I don't like how he describes (Y/n)," Dean commented. "It's weird. It's like he's in love. Listen to this..."

Dean dramatically clears his throat and starts to read in an even more dramatic voice, "'Even after a hard hunt, (Y/n) could easily be seen as the most beautiful of the siblings. They mimicked the beauty of their mother more than their brothers. There's no bruise or cut that could take the loveliness away from the natural curves of (Y/n)'s face. If only they could see how everyone else would stare-"

"Okay, ew," I muttered, walking to the table. "What'd you find?"

"Well, it seems like Carver Edlund is a pen name," Sam shrugged. "And the fans are intense."

"As in," Dean asked, closing the book and joining the two of us at the table.

"Well," Sam handed me the laptop so Dean and I could look at it, "there's fanfiction. About all of us."

"What's this, 'Sam/Dean'," I asked.

"It's... me and Dean... together."

"They just don't care that we're related," Dean asked. Sam nodded.

"God, this is so weird."

"So, how do we find this guy," I asked.

--time skip--

We managed to find the publisher of the novels and found her house.

"So, you published the 'Supernatural' books," I asked as we walked in.

"Yep," she nodded. "Yeah, gosh. These books... they never really got the attention that they deserved. All anybody wants to read anymore is that romance crap."

"Could not agree with you more," I said. "We're hoping that our article can shine a light on an underappreciated series."

"Yeah, because, you know, if we got a little bit of good press, then maybe we can start publishing again," she replied excitedly.

"No, no, no," Dean immediately shut her down. "I mean, why... why would you want to do that? It's such a complete series with Dean going to hell and all."

"Oh my god, that was one of my favorite ones," she rambled. "Dean was so strong and sad and brave. And Sam... I mean... the best ones are when they cry... like in 'Heart' when Sam had to kill Madison; the first woman since Jessica he'd really loved. When Dean had to call John in 'Home' and ask him for help. Or when (Y/n) went back to the motel room after getting kidnapped and just had to sit in their own head and had to truly process not only the death of their mother but now their father. The mixed feelings were amazing."

"You're a really big fan," I noted. She nodded.

"Gosh, if only real men were that open about their emotions."

"Real men," Dean asked.

"I mean, no offense," she replied. "How often do you cry like that?"

"Well, right now I'm crying on the inside," he muttered.

"Is that supposed to be funny?"

"Lady, this whole thing is funny."

"How am I supposed to know this is legit?"

"Oh, trust me," Dean mumbled. "We're legit."

"Well, I don't want some smart-ass article making fun of my boys," she snapped as she sat in her chair.

"Oh, never," I replied quickly. "We actually are big fans."

"You read the books?"

"Cover to cover," I promised.

"What's the year and model of the car?"

"1967 Chevy Impala," Dean smiled proudly.

"What's May 2nd?"

"That's my- uh... Sam's birthday," Sam replied.

"Sam's score on the LSAT?"

"Umm... 174," Sam said nervously.

"(Y/n)'s first hunt?"

"Vampire in Washington," I answered. "Dean was at the motel sick and (Y/n) almost chopped John's head off when he scared them."

"(Y/n)'s favorite memory that's not related to hunting?"

I smiled, "Helping Sam get ready for a date when he was a teenager because Sam didn't trust what Dean had told him."

"Dean's favorite song?"

"It's a tie," Dean replied. "Between Zep's 'Ramble On' and 'Traveling Riverside Blues.'"

She finally laughed and smiled again, "Okay, okay. What do you wanna know?"

"What's Carver Edlund's real name," Sam asked.

"Oh, no. I can't," she shook her head.

"We just wanna talk to him," Sam continued. "You know, get the 'Supernatural' story in his own words."

"He's very private," she shrugged. "Like Salinger."

"Please," Sam tried again. "Like I said, we're um... big fans."

Sam unbuttoned his shirt enough to show his anti-possession tattoo. Dean pulled his shirt to the side to do the same. I rolled my eyes and yanked the arm of my jacket down and pulled up the sleeve of my t-shirt. I don't wear as many layers as them and I had opted to put the tattoo on my upper arm because I thought it looked nicer.

"Awesome," the lady mumbled before standing up. "Y'know what?"

I looked away as she pulled her pants down.

"I got one too."

"Wow, you are a fan," I slapped Dean's arm. The lady fixed her clothing before grabbing a pen and paper.

"Okay," she said. "His name's Chuck Shurley-"

And I stopped listening after that. I knew that name... why did I know that name... oh... oh no. I'm gonna kill him. We're going to meet this man and I am going to end up killing him.

I followed Sam and Dean as they started walking out of the woman's house.

"Excuse me," she called as we reached the door. We looked back at her. "I'm sorry, but you look exactly like how I picture (Y/n) when I read the books."

I chuckled, "Thanks."

"He describes (Y/n) with so much detail," she smiled. "You could play them in a movie."

"Thank you," I waved as we walked out.

"'You could play them in a movie,'" Dean teased.

"I know who Chuck is," I said, ignoring him.

"What," he asked. I nodded. "How?"

I pointed to get into the car. I got in the back seat and Sam and Dean sat upfront. Dean started driving to the address the lady gave us before I started speaking.

"Okay, when you went to hell, Sam's not the only one who ran off," I explained. "I wasn't gone for four months... just two weeks. In those two weeks, I got involved in a single one-night stand. The name he gave me was Chuck Shurley."

"You screwed the man who wrote books about us," Dean asked, sounding angry.

"Do you think I knew he was writing books based on our lives?"

"He had to have known who you are," Sam added. "This isn't an accident. He has to get visions or something."

"Yeah, I know," I nodded. "He made money off of my name and then screwed me."

"Damn," Dean mumbled. "I missed a hell of a lot."

I rolled my eyes.

--time skip--

I knocked on the door loudly. Sam grabbed my arm, shaking his head at me. The door was opened and I smiled obnoxiously as Chuck. He was in a robe, his boxers, and an old white shirt. He looked tired and like he hadn't had a goodnight's sleep in days.

"Chuck Shurley," Dean asked.

"Chuck Shurley that wrote the Supernatural books," Sam added.

"Nice to meet you," I said. "This is Sam... Dean... and I'm (Y/n)... the ones you've written books about."

Chuck sighed and went to shut the door. I stepped in, stopping it with my foot.

"Listen, I appreciate the enthusiasm, I really do and I remember you," he motioned at me, awkwardly grinning before seeming to shake the memories out of his head. I almost slapped him right then. "But please... go get a life."

"You see," Dean followed me, helping to force our way inside. Sam made sure the door shut behind us. "We have a life... and you're selling books about it."

"Okay, this isn't funny," Chuck mumbled.

"You're right," I said. "We just wanna know how you're doing it?"

"I'm just a writer, I'm not doing anything."

"Then why do you know so much about demons and tulpas and changelings?"

"Is this some kind of 'Misery' thing? Ah, it is, isn't it? It's a 'Misery' thing!"

"No, it's not," I shook my head. "Believe me, we're not fans."

"What do you want then," he asked.

"I'm Sam... and that's Dean and (Y/n)," Sam tried again.

"Those are fictional characters," Chuck yelled. "They aren't real!"

Dean grabbed him and pulled him outside.

"Wait, wait-"

"We aren't kidnapping you, calm down," I rolled my eyes. Dean opened the hidden compartment in the impala's trunk.

"Are those real guns?"

"Yes," I nodded. "And real rock salt, real fake IDs."

Chuck let out a laugh at it, "Well, I gotta hand it to you guys. You really are my number-one fans. That... That's awesome. So, I-I think I've got some poster in the house."

"Chuck, stop," I rolled my eyes, grabbing his arm as he went to walk away.

"Please don't hurt me," he begged.

"How much do you know," Sam asked. "Do you know about the angels? Or Lilith breaking the seals?"

"How do you know about that?"

"Have you not been listening," I asked. "The real question is how do you?"

"Because I wrote it," he explained.

"You kept writing?"

"The books never came out because the publisher went bankrupt," he furrowed his eyebrows.

I stepped back, letting go of his arms.

"Okay, wait a minute," Chuck crossed his arms. "This is some kind of joke, right? Did Phil put you up to this?"

"Oh my god," I muttered, pinching the bridge of my nose. I grabbed his robe. "I'm sorry but I'm really tired. Nice to meet you. I'm (Y/n) Winchester, these are my brothers, Sam and Dean Winchester. You wrote and published books about us, probably knew who I was, and then you still slept with me."

He stared at me in shock.

"What," I asked.

"The last names were never in the books," he mumbled. "I never told anyone about that. I never even wrote that down."

"Then I guess we have a lot to talk about," I let go of his robe.

The three of us followed him inside.

--time skip--

"I got a visit from Cas," Dean explained as he walked in. "I've some important information."

After talking to Chuck and getting a draft of what was supposed to happen, we were all panicking. Dean told us to wait here. Lilith was going to come for Sam and we both thought it'd be harder if there was more than one of us here at all times.

Now, Dean was coming back from seeing Chuck.

"And that important information is...," Sam trailed off.

"He's a prophet of the lord," Dean said, smirking at me.

I shut my eyes, letting my head fall forward.

"Please say you're joking," I mumbled.

"Nope," Dean replied.

Sam looked over at me. He only started chuckling after his brother broke.

Dean was laughing his head off within seconds, "You screwed a prophet!"

"Shut up," I groaned. "I'm gonna kill him!"

"Archangel will kill you."

"I'll happily pay that price," I muttered. "I slept with a prophet."

"At least that means he didn't write himself to sleep with you," Sam tried to comfort me.

"Yeah, God just decided I was supposed to sleep with the guy publishing books about my life," I replied sarcastically. "That makes me feel so much better."

"Come on, it could be worst-"

"Sam, love you, but don't finish that sentence if you even kind of value your life," I muttered.

I was desperate for this conversation to just end.

--time skip--

After all was said and done, and Chuck accidentally helped us chase Lilith away for a while, we gave Chuck a lift back to his place.

I followed him up to his door, offering to look around and make sure that he's safe. He shook his head.

"I have an archangel protecting me," he reminded me. "Can't get any safer than that."

I nodded.

"I'm sorry, by the way," he said. "About us. I didn't recognize you until after... it all... and I didn't say anything because I didn't really know how to explain it. The whole event makes me feel all scummy."

"It's alright," I replied with a chuckle. "It's fine, I promise."

He offered me a nervous smile, "Y'know, in all of my visions, you're the most vivid thing."

With a grin, I leaned over and kissed his cheek gently. I stepped back and headed back toward the impala. I made sure to take note of his nervous and flustered face.

"See you around, Chuck!"

"You... You too," he called after me. I got in the backseat and got comfortable.

"So... screwing the prophet wasn't that bad," Dean asked.

I just rolled my eyes, waving through the window at Chuck as Dean pulled away from the curb. Leave it to a Winchester to end up in a situation like that.

--time skip (season 11)--

Sam and I followed Dean with our guns ready. Dean was following the amulet that he had owned for a long time without even knowing it could show us where God was.

Everyone had been infected by Amara only minutes ago but now it was okay and Dean's amulet was glowing.

"Holy shit," I mumbled, seeing who was walking over to us.

Chuck.

He was supposed to be dead. That's why Kevin's prophet powers had been activated.

"No way," Dean said.

"Hey," Chuck... or God said. "We need to talk."

Despite our understandable hesitation, Chuck reached forward, teleporting all of us back to the bunker. I stepped away from him, slightly overwhelmed.

"(Y/n)," Chuck walked over and tried to grab my arm. I instinctually slapped him. I was nothing but confusion and anger. "I deserved that. Just, please?"

I stepped away again.

From behind Chuck stepped Kevin's ghost. My breath caught in my throat. The poor boy had been through so much shit because of us.

Kevin told us about how we looked stressed and that we should listen to Chuck.

Then, Chuck waved his hand. Kevin turned into a ball of white and blue light before ascending beyond the bunker.

"Where'd he go," I asked.

"Heaven, where he deserves," Chuck promised. I nodded.

I listened to the rant about how Chuck had abandoned us all and how awful things were. Then, the conversation turned to the plan to stop Amara. The boys talked about needing Lucifer and Chuck got incredibly upset. In a fit, he went to leave. I stepped in front of him.

"No," I said bluntly. "Even if you want to avoid the subject of your estranged son, you can't just leave."

"(Y/n)-"

"Sam, Dean," I looked at them. "Give us a minute?"

They both nodded, glaring at Chuck on their way out. I tried to ignore the instincts that were telling me that Chuck was just selfish.

"(Y/n)," Chuck mumbled.

"Just answer my questions," I said. "Then we can discuss what to do with Amara without you storming away recklessly. Okay?"

He nodded.

"Have you been God the whole time," I asked.

He nodded.

"You wrote all of our stories?"

Another nod.

"Did you write that I was going to sleep with you?"

I felt manipulated and angry. I was desperate for an answer. I knew that this could've made me feel like dirt, but I needed to know.

"No," Chuck said. I clenched my jaw, ready to call him a liar. "I told you. I had been pretty much hands-off for a long time. Did I know who were? Absolutely. I'm sorry I lied to you about that. But I didn't plan anything between us. We weren't some divine plan."

I nodded, looking down.

"You know how Dean and Amara are connected," he asked. I nodded, looking back at him. "We're like them."

"And that's not a divine plan-"

"I'm not doing a good job explaining this," Chuck shook his head. "It feels like we're like them. Like there's this bond that just happened as soon as we met."

"You lied to me, for years," I said. "Saying we have some bond isn't gonna fix that."

"I know."

We both fell silent. Slowly, I started laughing. Chuck furrowed his eyebrows, "My only one-night stand... and it was God."

Chuck started laughing with me while I really processed what I had done.

I slowly stopped laughing.

I didn't notice until it was too late that Chuck had slowly gotten closer to me. As soon as his lips brushed mine, I pushed him back. Not hard, but enough to get him to step away.

"No," I mumbled. "Not that, no."

Chuck nodded, "Got it."

"Now," I sighed, "we need to actually plan to stop Amara, and if we need Luci-"

"We don't," he said bluntly. "We can do something else. We don't need him. Okay?"

I nodded. In my gut, I trusted him. Maybe that was me being an idiot but I did trust him. For now at least.

-------------------------------------

Masterlist

What I Write For

Request Guidelines

Musical Prompts

Small Moments With…

When Worlds Collide (Doctor Who Crossover Series) Masterlist

Some Original Characters

folklore/evermore Writing Challenge (and Masterlist)

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

hi I’m here to review the Clementine comic. it’s not good.

Does this even need an introduction? You know why I’ve gathered you all here today. You know the comic exists, and you probably know that it’s not great and we’re all upset about it. 

Myself included. I am not okay. At all. 

Skybound could’ve literally spit in my face and I’d come out feeling better than I did reading this comic, because this comic is an insult to the original Telltale games and Clementine as a character. 

This comic is a fancy fanfic. Glorified fanfiction. It’s not canon, and Skybound and Tillie can pretend that it is, but it’s not. Bold of them to assume we’d just accept this from people who didn’t work on the original games and never wrote for Clementine before, and based on this comic alone, any chance of us taking it seriously is gone. 

I’m gonna go through every single page, every panel, of this comic and give you my review. So I guess if you’re worried about spoilers [though at this point why would you?] then be warned, spoilers for the entire comic ahead. 

I also wanna add that I have nothing against Tillie Walden. I know a lot of dingdongs are harassing her on insta over this comic and that’s not okay. You telling her how much you hate her isn’t going to change anything. If anything, you keep being assholes to her and she’s just gonna block everything out, even things simply critiquing her work in hopes that it helps her improve. 

You’re allowed to be upset about the comic and share your feelings about it, but don’t take it out on the actual human being like that. Besides, like I’ve said before, if Tillie wasn’t gonna make the comic, Skybound would’ve found someone else to do. This was coming no matter what because Skybound wants that coin. 

That being said, I’m not going to hold back my opinions on this comic. Skybound and Tillie made this comic, they put it out there and asked for money for it, therefore I’m allowed to explain why it’s garbage as well as ponder over the questionable intent and whether or not Tillie actually has played these games. Y’know, it’s like how I have nothing against Kent, but sometimes he says things I disagree with and well, y’know how it goes. 

Alright, this is gonna be long, so let’s go--

The first few shots we get are of the school, two people sleeping, and Clementine’s empty bed. Nothing super note-worthy, we have no idea who is sleeping in the beds, it’s just there to establish that it’s early and everyone’s still asleep. 

The drawing of the school looks fine? Not super accurate, but I can give it a pass since it’s a few years later, I assume. What I can’t give a pass is how you managed to already mess up on the first page of your comic. 

Because..... why are you implying that Clementine’s room is upstairs? First of all, seems kinda dumb to put Clem, who has only one leg and has to walk with crutches, upstairs. Also, if you’ve played TFS and paid any attention to where her room is actually located [the dorms] then you’d know there isn’t any stairs leading to their floor. It’s the side building next to the admin building, you walk through the door, go down the hall, take a left and their dorm is right there sooo..... 

Oh right, it’s probably done this way so that we can have such a suspenseful moment where Clementine is sneaking out while the others are asleep and her foot makes a creeeeeeakk that could wake everyone up, thwarting her plans of abandoning everyone quietly so she doesn’t have to deal with any consequences. 

Because yeah, Clementine is sneaking out with all of her supplies because apparently, she’s been planning an escape from this place for a while. 

And just look at how gosh darn happy she is about it. You can’t see or hear me, but know that I’m laughing. Don’t worry, I will talk about her abandoning everyone later.

But first, I have a gripe with Clementine's design in this comic. It doesn’t look like her. This art of her right here is the most accurate we get throughout all 12 pages, and it’s the best looking, too. 

Moving on, she slams the door shut while this walker changes faces and hair between panels, so that’s cool. I will say, I like the idea of the Ericson crew putting spikes on the door. That’s fun. 

Though Clementine slamming the door shut while trying to sneak out seems counter productive but it fits with the theme this comic has of inconsistency, so it works. 

Next we have Clementine going to what I believe is the fishing shack by the river, and she’s going through some things that she’s stashed away, telling us that she’s been planning this escape for a while. 

Oh good, she has a map. Well at least now she won’t get lost out there in the woods while she makes her escape... also that last panel with her profile.... why does it look so funny? Like this page of the comic doesn’t look too bad, but there is something off putting about her eye there and how she has zero expression. 

And it turns out that rustle was a walker, and Clementine is super inconvenienced by this and gives us our first piece of witty dialogue.

Yeah you dumb walker, can’t you see Clementine is busy running away from home and abandoning all of her loved ones without a single goodbye so she doesn’t have to witness the consequences of her selfish actions?? Gosh, so rude.

Just a heads up, the dialogue in this comic is stilted, emotionless, and bland. The words have no flow, no charm, and never feel like they should be coming out of Clementine’s mouth. Then again, the upcoming graphic novels this is tied to are for young adult/middle graders so I guess we have to dumb everything down so their baby brains can process it. 

.....Why does her face look like that? Also, interesting that she decided to move her ponytail to the other side of her head.... which is a thing that happens throughout this comic, her hair will randomly change sides. 

I believe it’s a metaphor for her changing and inconsistent personality. 

So yeah, Clementine is just making off with the supplies she gathered [I’m sure Ericson doesn’t need ‘em anyway] and she’s just so gosh darn annoyed at all these small inconveniences bothering her.... because it’s just too early for this. 

.....Again, why does her face look like that?

I’m sorry, like I get it, Tillie’s style is supposed to be purposely messy yet minimal but it doesn’t work. When you do a comic in a more messy style, usually it has charm and heart put into it. Effort goes into the messy look, and when things are minimal, that usually means more clean, yeah? So you put them together and just..... that is nothing resembling Clementine’s face. 

Can we just--

Look at canon Clementine’s face. Look at the way her eyebrows are shapes, how wide her eyes are with her eye lashes. The dirt on her skin, the lines-- there is so much personality in her features. It doesn’t matter if she’s wearing a neutral expression or she’s expressing anger or joy or sorrow or whatever. 

Now, is it fair to compare a model of Clem from the games to the Clem in this comic? Well, I assume that if Tillie is doing this comic, she would use references from the game to ensure that Clementine is recognizable, especially now that she’s no longer wearing her signature hat. 

So why does she look like this? Why do I look at these drawings of her face and see nothing but a pair of eyes, a nose, and a mouth? You might as well draw me a simple smiley face. And I get that it’s a comic, and it’s a lot of work to draw the same character over and over again and you gotta cut corners somewhere, but maybe put some effort into the close up shots of her face so that we can actually see it’s her? 

Other fan artists have made comics in their styles that shine bright with Clementine’s personality, so what happened here? 

Anyway, surprise..... it’s not a walker annoying Clementine. 

........Why does AJ look like that??? I’m sorry, I hate to do the same thing I just did but--

Just because you put Clementine’s hat on AJ that doesn’t automatically make it him. I just.... wow. This feels like there wasn’t a single reference involved, like if someone gave Tillie a basic description of AJ and she just did this. 

But appearances aside, what is AJ saying? He says that he knew it, that Clementine’s leaving and I cannot stand this dialogue. It’s unnatural. Again, I know you wanna dumb it down for all of us because I guess we dumb.... but this conversation does not feel natural. 

“I knew it. You’re leaving.” “AJ....” “I’m coming.”

Even if you changed it to, “I’m coming with you.” it would sound more natural. Hell, he doesn’t even question WHY she’s leaving, he just stands there like “I’m coming” like??? I’m sorry, have you ever heard a single word this murder baby has said? I assume you have because I assume you actually played TFS, right? Soooo.... what happened here?

.....whY DO THEIR FACES LOOK LIEK THAT KSAJDLKJAS:LKDJLKASJD:L--

So now we’re getting into it.... into the bullshit. 

Clementine tells AJ to go back to the school, and AJ says that she wasn’t even going to say goodbye..... and then more bad dialogue that sound unnatural when you try to fucking read it. 

First off.... AJ’s reaction to Clementine attempting to leave is barely anything. Again, I hate to keep questioning if you actually played TFS, but AJ would throw a fucking fit if he caught Clementine out here ALONE like this, attempting to leave. 

And then he says “Like last time? You were going to come back?” this sentence makes my brain hurt. I just.... “Like last time, right? You’re coming back?” UGH

Wow, I feel nothing. 

I’m sitting here watching these two imposters with fucked up faces who are supposed to be Clementine and AJ and I feel nothing. 

I’m not even going to comment on the faces anymore. You can see it. You know. 

So yeah... AJ tells her the #1 rule, and reminds her that she promised.

Y’know.... she promised that she would never leave him again? Remember? At the McCarroll ranch? That flashback that was in TFS? The one you would watch if you played the game? 

Why is she looking straight at me when she should be looking at AJ as she says this? Is this Clementine’s way of telling me she’s sorry for what a shitty direction this is taking? I wouldn’t know because her face isn’t doing anything. Just because you draw a couple of tears that doesn’t mean I’m feeling the emotional heartbreak you’re attempting to convey. 

I don’t have enough middle fingers for this.

Well, my hat’s off to you. Ya did it. Ya fucked up everything single part of Clementine’s character in the span of two pages, I’m almost impressed. 

First off, the baby thing is weird. Why is she calling him that? She’s never called him that, which you should know.

Second, she’s not happy and that’s why she’s leaving. Clementine isn’t happy, and AJ can’t make her happy. Ericson can’t make her happy. So she’s going to go out on the road to.... what, be unhappy by herself? 

I’m sorry, but apparently we need a few reminders here of who Clementine is, because this isn’t her. 

This is Clementine. 

Clementine fought for years to find a home, something she hasn’t had since she was an eight-year-old girl before the apocalypse. The motor-inn wasn’t a home, the cabin wasn’t home, the ski-lodge, Howe’s, Wellington, Richmond, Prescott, none of them were home. 

She struggled for years, dealing with trauma after trauma while out on the road. She went from group to group, watching people she cared about die and she was powerless to do anything about it. Whenever she let her guard down and become comfortable, it bit in her in the ass and left her heartbroken.

She was there when AJ was born. She grew close to Rebecca while she was pregnant, she let herself do that even after everything she went through with Christa. Clementine had a bond with AJ even before he was born, and after Rebecca died, she did what she could to keep him safe, despite play choice. 

She cried when she thought AJ died and when she found him in that car again. She swore to protect him, to raise him right and love him. All they had was each other. 

And when she joined the new frontier and AJ got sick, she risked everything to save him and she was devastated when they took him away from her. When she found out he was alive, she is willing to go as far as helping Lingard overdose [INJECTING HIM HERSELF IF SHE HAS TO] to figure out his location. She did shitty things to find him, she killed people at McCarroll Ranch to find him again. 

Clementine raised him and he is her family, do you understand that? She went to hell and back for him, she taught him how to protect himself, and even though she made mistakes she sacrificed everything for him. She promised him that they would have a home of their own one day, she talked about how much she wished for a world where she didn’t have to worry about fighting and killing and AJ could just be a happy kid. 

She fought for Ericson, she watched her friends die or become mutilated by someone from her past. She allowed herself to be vulnerable enough to pursue a romantic relationship with Louis or Violet because she felt safe with them, felt safe at Ericson because it’s their home now. 

And when Clementine was bit, she thought she was going to die but she still fought to make sure AJ would be safe and happy without her and it was heartbreaking. She’s dying and the only thing she cares about is AJ. Not herself, not what’s going to happen to her after she dies or turns... no, she tries to make AJ smile again, she makes sure he remembers the rules, and she tells him that she loves him. 

Then he cuts off her leg, and she survives. AJ saved her fucking life, and she got to wake up at home and live to see her family again. She got to push AJ on a tire swing, she got to eat a hot meal and laugh with her friends, she got to make plans with her lover/best friend for what’s next for Ericson, and she got to talk to AJ and tell him the truth... and she asked him if she did a good job, and he’s honest with her right back. 

Hell, she tells him to keep her hat. Her iconic hat. The one thing she has left of her father, possibly her more cherished item. She lets him keep it. 

The last time we see Clementine, she’s happy. She’s sitting on the steps by herself, staring at her family with such fondness in her eyes and a smile on her face because she finally did it. She finally found a home where she can breathe. She has a bed to sleep in, she has AJ with her, she has a boyfriend/girlfriend who loves her and who she loves back, she has friends she can rely on. 

Clementine smiles, and lets out a small laugh. 

She doesn’t have to run anymore. 

And now you have the balls to tell me that AJ and Ericson don’t make Clementine happy anymore. 

She abandons everything to go back out on the road again, and that’s proof enough for me that you don’t understand a damn thing about Clementine or her journey. 

“ I don't even know the person I'm talking about... It's like all we have in common is the same name.” 

....Anyway.

Wow, Clementine found a car and kept is stashed. How lazy and convenient for this bullshit plot. 

And this is the part where I have to tell this comic to fuck off. 

What, you think if you throw in an incredibly inaccurate flashback next to a current pair of hugging Clem and AJ that I’ll feel anything but anger? That flashback is a slap to the face. It’s snowing, but the only time we’ve seen snow is in S2 when AJ was a literal new born, so why is he that big? Is that supposed to be from ANF because that ALSO doesn’t look like that AJ, and that’s not the outfit Clementine had on... AND there was no snow. This is cheap and meaningless. 

Any fan of the series who has played through the games could tell you this. 

So.... AJ runs into the woods and then we get this garbage.

This comic is awful. It misses the point of everything TFS, and the rest of the series, stood for. There is no heart here. I feel no happiness in reading it, and I don’t detect any passion behind it. It’s a lifeless comic that retcons everything in order to throw AJ away and start fresh with a new adventure for Clementine that makes no sense because the cow isn’t profitable unless it’s milked. 

This isn’t canon, and it won’t ever be canon, and honestly? At this point, I have no faith in the graphic novel trilogy. It will take a lot to do a turn around from this, and I don’t even know if that’s possible. 

Again, to reiterate, I don’t have anything personal against Tillie Walden herself. She’s just doing her job, and from what I’ve seen of her as a person, she seems like a sweetheart. I don’t want anyone giving her shit because I think the comic isn’t good or that you agree with me. All of my anger is directed at the comic itself, her work, not specifically her.... and a little bit at Skybound, because they’re the reason this is even a thing in the first place. 

So yeah.... there ya have it. 

[queers-gambit]

I've just read the other two stories, similar to cherry blossoms and OMG. I know I've already complimented you on that one, but boy did I read them in the wrong order because I can't stop crying. I'm gonna shower you in praises because you wrote three ABSOLUTELY STUNNING pieces. The thought that you put behind every single one, every word and action made me feel as if I'm reading a novel written by one of the Brontë sisters. I'm only comparing you to them, by holding you in very high regards, because Wuthering Heights is the only book that made me feel actually heartbroken -something that I've experienced again with your stories.

As a reader I can't help but feel as if I've lived those tales in another lifetime, your beautiful words shaping the stories in my mind as mere memories, making me feel a desperate longing for someone, something, somewhere that never actually happened.

I'm so shocked and stunned and sad but also happy that I find it hard to put into words just how much I've loved them. I hope you know how ridiculously gifted and talented you are, how you create and destroy worlds so effortlessly. All I can do is say thank you for sharing your work, your talent with us on this app. Thank you!!❤️❤️

I know how awful this is but I'm still crying and it's 1 am, so sorry for dumping this load of emotion on you. Didn't know where else to show my gratitude and appreciation❤️

Also, I'm gonna hug you now.🫂

i saved this one for last because i'm in awe. and i have genuine tears in my eyes, because wow. don't think i'm a pussy, but i'm honestly just a little shocked that you're complimenting me like this.

so, thank you. i'm honestly just tongue tied right now and it's a wee bit hard to see what i'm typing because i'm emotional. you comparing me to actual, legendary authors is just - wow. like, really, wow.

i don't think i deserve it but after reading ALL of these supportive messages, i don't know, maybe i'll have to find a little more confidence in myself. but this message? this message right here? i might have to, like, print out and hang on a bulletin board somewhere so i can look back on it because i'm THAT moved and touched by this. i want to feel what i felt reading this everyday.

i don't think you really realize how MUCH this means to me.

so, just - just wow. thank YOU so fucking much for sending this, i'm still just shocked and in total awe. all i can really say is thank you, again, because it's messages like these that genuinely keep me going. not just on Tumblr, but elsewhere.

no, no, no, poppet, you're not dumping anything on me - i love reading your messages. your responses. seeing the emotion i've evoked with a few silly little strokes of my keyboard. like i'm actually crying a little harder now because i'm still so fucking grateful and keep rereading your message. i just love talking to you lot honestly! and please, showing the author your appreciation and gratitude is the EXACT place to "dump" your feelings.

because i live for it, okay?

just wow.

i really hope i can continue to wow you. and i hope i can continue to do justice to this art form we call penmanship.

every single ounce of love, appreciation, and gratitude i have is yours, my dove. and please, i don't know what else to say but thank you so much. i'm still emotional but this is so validating. so, thank you. thank you so very much. i love you 🖤

[oscar-lettjohanssonloveme]

Sleepless (Miss Venable x reader)

Good evening my dear friends (idk about the time where u live, but in germany its 11 pm)  :D This is random and kinda short, but you know, i wrote on mr. sandman pt. 2 today (which is really angsty) and I just wanted some fluffy thing so i wrote this sksksksk

sorry for my english.. ..yk, googletranslate the love of my life :3

summary: u cant sleep, and thats why you wake up ur gf

warnings: nothing i guess?

It wasn't unusual if you couldn't sleep at night. You weren't a person who needed a lot of sleep. Usually you just lay there and watch your girlfriend sleep. Mina was actually a very strict and disciplined woman and that you could watch her sleep was a privilege.

It was currently 2 a.m. From outside the rain pelted against the window pane of your bedroom, while the bright full moon lit the room pleasantly and you could watch the face of your sleeping girlfriend. And Mina could say what she wanted, but she just looked cute when she slept.

As so often, you braided the few locks of hair that were messy on her pillow and you knew she would probably be upset about it the next morning. Not because her hair would be even more messy than it was every morning anyway, but simply because then she would know that you hadn't slept again.

And while you were playing with her hair that night and watching her face twitch in her sleep because of what she was dreaming, you noticed that it was still not enough. You wanted to see her beautiful eyes, hear her voice, you just wanted her attention. And that's why you decided to wake her up.

"Mina?" You whispered softly, examining her face for any reaction, but nothing happened.

"Baby .." you begged a little louder again.

This time Mina hummed in agreement, still with her eyes closed, but better than nothing.

"Could you wake up for me, please? I'm bored .." you mumbled and put your hand on her cheek to use your thumb to smooth her pale skin. And a few seconds later your girlfriend finally opened her eyes to stare at you tiredly and frowning.

"What time is it?" She asked in a thick voice and grabbed your hand, which was on her cheek.

"2 a.m.."

"And how long have you been up?"

"For an hour? I don't know ..", you muttered and watched Mina roll over on her back and rub her eyes with both hands.

"You should drink less coffee, princess ..", she finally said and of course she couldn't see how you rolled your eyes.

"So what do we do now?" She asked as she turned back to you.

You shrugged your shoulders.

"I don't know .. tell me something beautiful.."

"And what?"

"Its your decision, be creative", you replied just before you turned around to turn on the bedside lamp.

"Oh come on ..", Mina grumbled reluctantly and you had to grin when you saw her screw up her eyes against the light.

"I can tell you about the book I'm reading now .."

"Isn't that some medieval novel in which a lot of people are brutally murdered..?" You asked with a frown.

Mina hummed in agreement as she began to comb through your hair with her fingers.

"And it's really  good .."

"But that's not beautiful ..".

"Then let me think for a moment ..", Mina sighed and actually seemed to be thinking hard about what she could tell you. And again you couldn't help but find her incredibly cute when she stared intently into your eyes and chewed on her lower lip.

"So .." she finally started and you had to smile.

"So?" You repeated.

"I have no idea if that's what you think of as something 'beautiful', but did I tell you about how I fell in love with my doctor when I was 16?" She asked with a wry smile and you shook quickly the head.

"No, but I want to hear it .."

"Well ..", she started and pulled the covers a little further over her shoulders. "As you know, I have been to various doctors because of my scoliosis and when I was 16, I got a new doctor and she was really hot .."

"Is that a kink?" You asked with a grin and she rolled her eyes.

"That's ridiculous .. I think I just liked her because she was the first doctor who was nice to me .." Mina explained and looked at you thoughtfully.

"Define 'nice"

"Well, she asked, if she hurts me when she examined me or something like that.."

"But that's more sad than beautiful .." you moaned and started to play with the hem of your duvet.

"As I said, she also looked good .." Mina added and you had to laugh.

"Nice and good-looking? You don't have many expectations, Mina .."

"Oh wow .." she muttered disapprovingly.

"You wanted me to tell you something beautiful and thats it .."

"Thats it? That wasn't that beautiful now .." you said and looked at her disappointed. Mina just sighed and closed her eyes again.

"It's two o'clock in the morning, you can't expect much from me. And if you didn't like it, then you can tell me something beautiful ..", she mumbled and you could hear her voice getting low at the end of the sentence and she was probably falling asleep again.

"But I wanted to hear your voice .." you pleaded as you grabbed her hand to intertwine your fingers with hers.

"Can you sing or something?"

"Princess, I would do anything for you, but singing is definitely not one of them ..", Mina, who had opened her eyes again, said and tried to suppress her grin.

"Hmm .." you thought and looked at her thoughtfully.

"You could also let me braid your hair, then you would have curls tomorrow .."

"But I never wear curls."

"But it would look cute .." you said, cocking your head.

"Okay ..", your girlfriend finally sighed before she sat up and you could climb behind her.

"Well ..", you started with a satisfied smile on your face as Mina sat between your legs.

"Can you get the hairbrush? If so, please give it to me ..".

Mina hummed in agreement and grabbed the brush that was lying on her dessert while you gathered her red hair in your hands to place it behind her shoulders. Mina handed you the black hairbrush and you started combing softly through her long hair. For a moment there was silence between the two of you, and while you focused on not hurting her in any way, you were afraid that she might fall asleep again. You suddenly felt bad about waking her up. Mina would never be angry with you about it, but it was somehow selfish of you to disturb her sleep just because you hadn't been able to sleep.

"It's getting more and more common, don't you agree?", Mina suddenly asked and refuted your fear that she had fallen asleep.

"What do you mean?", You replied confused when you started to divide her hair into three equal strands.

"I wake up more often in the morning with braided locks in my hair ..".

"If it bothers you, I can do something else to pass the time at night ..".

"How about sleeping?" Mina interjected.

"Not funny .." you growled and started to braid her hair.

"Is it a physical or a psychological problem that you cannot sleep? Maybe you should see a doctor ...".

"I dont know ..", you muttered. "There are just so many thoughts in my head that scream to be thought through to the end .."

"What thoughts?" Mina asked and you could hear the concern in her voice.

"No bad thoughts .." you said quickly.

"Just so many ideas that I have. And I'm afraid that I will forget them when I sleep and that's why I think about them at night ..".

"Okay .." Mina said quietly.

"You could just write these ideas down and think about them the next day .."

"Maybe that's not a bad idea .." you muttered as you pulled the elastic off the stalk of the hairbrush and wrapped it around the end of the pigtail.

"Or it is really because you're drinking too much coffee .." she teased you.

"It's unfair, you drink a lot more coffee than I do .." you moaned.

You leaned over to place the brush back on the bedside table, before climbing back onto your side of the bed and curling up in her blanket.

"You look beautiful ..", you muttered unintentionally when you looked into the tired face of your girlfriend, who now had a plait on her shoulder and was looking down at you lovingly.

"Do you think you can sleep again now or do you want to do something else?", She asked, as she lay down again and pulled your body to her chest.

"I think it's enough .." you replied and stretched your arm around the blanket to wrap Mina as well, while she leaned over you to turn off the light.

"Thank you .." you whispered in the dark against the fabric of her nightgown.

"You don't have to say thank you, Princess .. I actually didn't do anything ..", Mina mumbled and put her chin on your head.

"That's not true, you were awake and I was allowed to braid your hair .."

You heard Mina laugh softly and put a kiss on your hair.

"I love you, princess ..".

"I love you too honey.." you replied.

"Oh and by the way, do you think I'm nice and good looking too?"

"Oh shut up and sleep, you little dork ..", Mina growled against your hair and you had to giggle.

"Or I'll show you how good looking I think you are .."

[inkykeiji]

how did u become such an amazing writer? this might sound dumb but every time i read your work i learn a bunch of new words lol

first of all, wow, thank you SO much for that compliment!!! i’m literally gushing over that one sentence alone hehehe thank you thank you <33 and that totally doesn’t sound dumb at all!!! i’m actually super happy to hear that!!! <3

beware: LONG post beneath the keep reading!!!

okay, so. bear with me for a moment while i ramble a little bit, okay? i want to preface this by linking you to a cute little post leah wrote on the concept of ‘talent’, just in case it’s something you need to hear!! i know sometimes people can get a little down on themselves + their skill and just go ‘oh well, i’m just not talented enough’ or ‘i wasn’t born with that talent’ and i want to discourage you from ever thinking like that. i agree 100% with leah; i believe ‘talent’ is simply a natural inclination someone might’ve been born with, but not that it means that someone who wasn’t born with that inclination can’t be just as good as the person with the ‘talent’; you absolutely can.

if you already knew that, then fantastic!!!! <333 i just wanted to mention it, just in case, you know???

okay!!! i think there are a few major factors that contribute to my current skill as a writer, and they’re the same three pieces of advice i give everyone who asks about how they can improve their craft:

practice

study/reading

consuming other art forms

- practice: i know this is probably a given, but it truly IS the best way to improve. (if you’ve been around on my blog for a while u might’ve already heard me say this a few times ehehe but) i always say creativity is a muscle—because it is. we all have it, and the more you ‘exercise’ it, the stronger it’ll become. skill is kind of the same way: the more you practice something, the better you’ll get at it, and the faster you’ll improve. HOWEVER!!!! i want to caution you against doing too much too fast. please, don’t overwhelm yourself!!! if you’re not used to writing often, work your way up to it at your own pace. there’s no rush or time limit here—you do what feels best for YOU at whatever pace is most comfortable. just like when you’re exercising a physical muscle, you can ‘strain’ your creative muscle by trying to do too much too quickly as well (creative burnout, basically).

for me, i write nearly every single day. sometimes it’s only a paragraph or two, sometimes its thousands of words, but the most important point here is that i am continuing to practice and sharpen my skills, you know? no practice is bad practice, i pinky promise you that. even if it feels like everything you’re writing is awful and you hate it all (and we ALL have these days, they are normal!!) you ARE still improving!!!

i want to make it clear here that i am NOT suggesting you write every single day if you aren’t already used to writing regularly. i’ve been writing since i was teeny tiny (seriously, at age 7 i used to walk around at recess talking to myself, literally telling myself a story out loud that i was making up on the spot........) and i’ve had plenty of time to practice and build up that stamina. i don’t know where you are in your writing journey, but if you aren’t used to writing regularly, work on building up to that first. again, don’t overwhelm yourself!!! it’s okay if it’s only a few sentences a few days a week—it’s something, and that’s what counts!

- study/reading: i read a LOT as a child, and i read a lot throughout university (and for university), and i try my best to find time to read now, a few hours a week. when you read, you are (on some level) studying the craft, among a whole slew of other things. you literally mentioned it yourself when you pointed out that you always learn some new vocab from reading my work!!! so please, read. anything and everything. do you have a favourite author or novel(s)? sit down and figure out why you like them. do you have any authors or books you just can’t stand? sit down and think about why you hate them, etc etc etc.

- consume other art forms: so i went to school for film, which meant i was watching five movies a week on average, not counting whatever i’d throw on at home while doing readings and all that. i genuinely think my education (studying films from all angles, from interdisciplinary perspectives, making films etc) helped me strengthen my skill as a writer even more. now, i’m not telling you to go get a film degree hehehe, all i’m saying is to consume other art forms in addition to reading: film, photography, painting, music, theatre, dance, etc etc etc. whatever you’d like/whatever interests you most. it’ll help you see things from different perspectives and, if i can be a little cheesy, it’s good for your soul <3

waaaaah sorry this post is SO LONG anon!!!! but those are the things that i think have helped me improve my skill the most, and continue to aid me!!! if anything’s unclear or you have any other questions please don’t hesitate to ask!! i hope this answers your question hehe <33

[magicbench]

what inspired you to write fujiwara and CoF? :)

[Sorry for the following wall of text, please bear with me lol] For Fujiwara, at first I actually didn't plan to make it a story this long...The project actually has a "first version", a really short game named "Fujiwara High School Festival" if I remember well the name and that I did for a visual novel's challenge called Nanoreno where you have to make something to start from fnish in 1 month. At the time I did it only to prove myself that I'd be able to do something on my own and be proud of it and the game only featured Ikki and Yuta who were simply called Delinquent-kun and Prince-sama. As you can see I didn't put much thoughts into giving them proper names xD And though they had "cliché" personalities, they didn't have a backstory at all either. Basically, the MC (who didn't have a name either) was a last year midle school student going to prospect a certain -but random- high school during its school festival's day, bumping either into Delinquent-kun or Prince-sama and doing a tour of the festival. Minami did already exist though ! And there was a super mega random classmate guy wearing a ghost costume too. That's pretty it.

But...the more I wrote about them, the more I got attached and in the end when I released this tiny project I realized it wasn't enough for me and started to give Delinquent-kun and Prince-sama names, friends, families, brainstorming why there personalities were like that, etc etc. More characters were added, Ikki would have childhood friends called Toshio and Ryu, Yuta would have a secret, and a smart rival (for studies and popularity) called Haru and who also have a secret. And this mister-random-ghost-guy ? Let's call him Kenji and be one of Minami's good friends ! Aaaand after that...I decided "Oh well...at this point I just want to write them all main and backstories. Let's make them LIs too !" I also tried and changed a lot the art style until I finally settled on what is the one in the current game ~ And there was finally born the Fujiwara Bittersweet that we know today, with Aya and the 6 sad boys x)

Now, for Colors of Fate, it was also after I did a Nanoreno on my own. Unfortunately you can't play it anymore (or was it Fujiwara V.1 ?) as the website where I uploaded it is down ^^" But maybe I'll share it on my Discord server someday since I still have the project's code O/ The only notable thing which change with CoF V.1 is that the prologue is way shorter than the demo's current version and that it has a end somehow, where you see the characters grown up after the incident. There was only one love interest at the time and the idea of adding more came after that, when I decided to make it a longer project. But...as you probably realized, this time I am not the one taking care of either the art of the writing and the reason is really simple : I thought that my style wouldn't fit a CoF's longer project at all and I didn't like my art for this kind of story either. I wanted something with a more flowery and poetic writing which I was totally unable to do myself, one of the main reason being that english isn't my native language and that wasn't confident in my capacities about conveying this kind of feeling in my writing x) Cirro did and I'm so glad she accepted to be CoF's writer ! The same goes for Aria's (sprite artist) and Kat's (backgrounds artist) art, I just fell in love with their work and couldn't in any way do such a good job as they did ! And with all the other members (music, code, proofreading/editing) I have no doubts that Colors of Fate will become a really beautiful project (I mean...the demo already is !) and that people will love our little Melia's story ! ❤ Also...for those who aren't aware, we decided to add the duke Aiden in addition to the other LIs. If you don't fear a fabulous "sadistic trash man", then you'll probably enjoy the experience with him too ;')

----- Phew, wow that was a lot of words ! Your eyes are doing okay ? ;-; In any case, I hope I was able to answer your question properly...don't hesitate to not read all of this in a one go xD