#or the way we pretend that we don't have bodily functions?

[pharawee]

Thai BL is trying to kill me today with all of its puke and fart noises. Please. I'm European. I can't do this. I'm too weak. :(((((

And also :((((( to Middleman's Love for wasting precious time by telling an unnecessary "ghost" story that isn't even in the novel when there's only 6 eps to go and so much good material to use. Did they have no budget left for this or why did they spent a good 15 minutes sitting in front of a static camera that didn't even show poor Mongkol when he was speaking because he wasn't in the frame? I'm so confused.

As for Twins: never mind Zee having to change his whole identity because his twin is impersonating him and hitting on his archnemesis. No, this is mild stuff compared to the "TIFU by shitting myself" incident. Zee better contact a good plastic surgeon to change his whole face Chains of Heart style. Again, what is this obsession with bodily functions in Thai BL? 😭😭😭

[bloompawz]

Some people can't seem to decide whether it's more stigmatized to get bottom surgery as a trans person or not get bottom surgery as a trans person. I'm here to say that both are incredibly stigmatized, because being trans is stigmatized, and there is no "right" way to do it. You're damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Transphobes think that bottom surgery is mutilation. They think that it poses a threat to society. They think that it's horrific and disgusting. They think that it couldn't possibly be consensual, because trans people consenting to these surgeries apparently isn't enough, no matter how insistent or persistent we are. They think that it's medical malpractice. They think that post-op genitals "don't count" as real genitals. They think that post-op genitals are inherently inferior to natal genitals in both visual appeal and function.

Transphobes think that pre/non-op trans people are predatory, especially trans women and transfems. They think that trans people are trying to "force" people to touch their natal genitals. They weaponize other queer identities: "You're not a woman; what lesbian would want to touch a penis?" / "You're not a man; what gay man would want to touch a vagina?"

But above all, transphobes think that no matter what you do with your genitals, you're a freak. A monster. A predator. A danger to society. A sign of the end times. A subhuman thing which forfeited its right to respect when it decided to deviate from the norm.

A transphobic comic comes to mind, which demonstrates this pretty well. The comic featured a caricature of a gay transgender man, "invading" a space for gay men.

It was visually apparent that his arm had been used as a graft for phalloplasty; this was a clear dig at bottom surgery. Transphobes love pointing at trans men's post-op arms and going "Eww! Look at how mutilated that arm is! This is what the trans agenda is doing to our precious, innocent, confused young girls! And also trans men are evil and are grooming little girls into being like them! But let's call it the 'trans agenda' instead, so we can remove their humanity and pretend this is a feminist statement. I swear I loooove trans men they're my sisters, take pity on them xoxo they just need help :3"

But despite the caricature's phalloplasty, he still referred to himself as having a vagina, and insisted that the gay men in the room had to enjoy touching it. Clearly casting pre/non-op trans people as predators who just want to pressure people into touching their natal genitals. And, if we interpret the caricature being a Salmacian, that's just another added layer of stigma.

The caricature both had bottom surgery and didn't have bottom surgery, because they needed to demonstrate that both options are horrific. Because, it's not about the surgery. It's about being trans.

We need to destigmatize bottom surgery. We need to destigmatize pre/non-op trans bodies as well. We need to normalize bodily autonomy. We need trans rights and acceptance for all trans people.

[thewertsearch]

TG: my thing is time yours is space TG: pretty different things

Not exactly. There are many physicists, I'm sure, who would argue that Space and Time should be one single Aspect - and I'm expecting Jade's powers to be in some way complementary to Dave's.

Come to think of it, there are several pairs of Aspects which seem complementary. Light and Void clearly evoke light and darkness, and Mind and Heart also seem dichotomous, potentially representing logic and emotion. Even Life and Doom have a life/death thing going on.

What's the opposite of Breath, then? It sort of pairs with Blood, since they're both bodily functions, but I can't comment on their symbolic relationship, since Blood is still a mystery to me. Breath too, come to think of it - most of my John analysis has been about his Class.

TG: you GET things about space i dont TG: or you will

The most obvious entry-level Space ability would be teleportation - but the Medium already is lousy with Appearifiers, Transportalizers, and portal-wielding First Guardians. It's certainly possible that Bec could teach her to teleport, but I don't know if it makes narrative sense for Jade's new power to be old news.

Perhaps, then, Jade will develop the second most obvious Space power - telekinesis.

GG: i wish i had winter clothes [...] GG: im so horribly unprepared for this…. i have never even seen snow before, can you believe that!!! [...] TG: well ive never seen it either now that i think about it

I was three years old when I first saw snow, and I don't think I'll ever forget the experience.

Guys, I know you're on the clock - or, at least, Jade is - but you deserve to take a moment here, and breath it all in. You only get one chance to see it for the first time.

GG: why dont we play in the snow later

Jade's first decision as a full-fledged Player is the best she'll ever make.

TG: im not gonna play in the snow

Translation: the next page will be a jump-cut to Dave in the snow.

TG: maybe you missed those credentials i flashed which clearly stated me being too cool for that [...] GG: i know youre joking around, you are not too cool at all, you dont even think that TG: ok

See! Even Jade knows he's full of shit.

I don't think Dave even wants to pretend he's too cool for this. His brain's on ironic autopilot at this point - but after today, he'll have IRL friends to play with, and those walls will start come down.

Yes, you heard me, Dave. Play. You're not 'hanging out' with your friends, you're not 'chilling' with them - you're playing. Let yourself be thirteen.

[privatehousesanatomy]

hi this is a very controversial topic in the house md fandom i feel like and i'm going to speak on it. feel free to agree or disagree in the comments and reblogs, but truthfully i don't think anything you can say can or will change my view point.

that being said - house was never the "bad guy". is he a great guy? absolutely not. he's deeply flawed and i can understand why a lot of people hate him. it's hard to like somebody when all you're seeing is what's on the surface. he's cold, abrasive, mean, and an entire list of other words i could use to describe house but that's not the point of this post.

i can guarantee that there is not a single person on this planet that could go through even a quarter of the shit that house has gone through and still say that they're not miserable. you cannot expect someone to go through hell and not come out of it a changed person, and you cannot get upset with a person who's gone through hell and is bitter because of it.

let's start with his childhood. it's always been kinda up in the air just how abusive house's father was - the only real instances we were ever given detailing the abuse was ice baths, being made to sleep in the yard, and being given the silent treatment, which are all absolutely horrible things to do to child, however his childhood wasn't something that was ever touched on a whole lot. house even admits that there were good times, and a lot of people overlook that fact. a lot of y'all aren't willing to accept that people can have good memories of their abusers - that's how they become abusers in the first place. especially in terms of abusive relationships - there had to be good memories before the bad ones could be made. we don't know how john house was in terms of how he spoke about his son to other people. he could have described his son as his pride and joy to the general public but behind closed doors shamed house for not being more like him. having a tainted relationship with a parental figure is damaging and it's really no wonder why house grew up with such a skewed perspective on the concept of unconditional love.

chronic pain is a whole other issue. he was forced into a medical procedure against his will and regardless of whether or not it saved his life, it was still a direct violation of his bodily autonomy and to make it worse, the person that did it to him ending up abandoning him when he became too much of a burden. chronic pain is already hard enough to deal with. i deal with it myself and i completely understand why house gets the way he gets when he's in pain. to the rest of the world, they watch him function and think that the pain can't be that bad, and it's the same shit i experience in my own daily life. the pain is incredibly overstimulating at times and despite how good we might be at pretending that it's not, we're suffering inside.

another thing that doesn't help is how many people remind house on a daily basis how horrible he is and how they're worse off for knowing him. do you honestly expect him to start acting like everything is all sunshine and rainbows when people are practically telling him he's better off dead? that the world would be a better place if he wasn't in it? he is the way he is because everything in his life has proven to him that for some god forsaken reason, the universe is working against him and the only way for it to not hurt him is for him to become an isolated, antisocial individual. can't get hurt if you don't let anyone in, right?

while i'm here, i'm also going to touch on instances in the show that he gets blamed for. amber's death and chase getting stabbed were not his fault. everyone wants to sit here and blame him but there's no blame to put on him. with amber, he specifically called looking for wilson. he told amber to find wilson and send him. amber came anyway. it wasn't her fault either. it was no one's fault but the guy that drove into the bus. house risked his life to try and save amber's, and yeah she died but it wasn't his fault.

and with chase getting stabbed, that wasn't house's fault either. house might have taken the blame for it because if the blame has to be pinned on someone, might as well be him, right? but you can't blame him for either situation.

idk maybe im yapping too much and maybe none of this makes sense but it makes sense to me

[blood-orange-juice]

About Childe and his weird gender again, expanding on this post.

I think it has a lot to do with how gender is constructed. Male gender has very clear-cut prescriptions, mostly it's everything that is considered "good" or "human" in current culture. The expectations it places on a person may not be realistic or achievable but they are very clear. Great importance is also placed on separating itself from Everything Female. Things That Are Too Much. Things that break the current culture meaning-making procedures.

Women, while having quite a few prescriptions of their own, also deal with whatever fell through the cracks. Someone needs to ensure the world still functions and reality is never completely covered by whatever official model of the world we currently have.

So women deal with the things men have the luxury not to notice. Mostly bodily and psychological aspects and societal injustice that are not supposed to exist in the ideal picture of society men have imagined. (to be fair, it happens to anyone oppressed and othered. the task of not letting the oppressors meet with reality is delegated to them. I'm just talking about women specifically in this post. but there's a reason oppressed minorities always have ties to supernatural in folklore)

In a way, feminine women are very scary. Walking semiotic horrors.

And I explain all this to say that Childe can be perceived as feminine in two ways.

First, with his disregard for all and any societal norms he just doesn't follow the normal gender prescriptions. He plays a superhero/knight role because it's shiny and it reminds him of the stories he loved as a kid. He doesn't suppress his love for his family because it brings him joy. He looks pretty because looks are a weapon too. He does all these things that would be either stereotypically masculine or painfully unmasculine for anyone else who cares about what society thinks, but he doesn't really see any difference between them. He truly, genuinely doesn't care what others think.

Second, he's also painfully aware of the dark and insane parts of the universe everyone else has the luxury to ignore. He also knows no one cares so he dances around the things a normal guy would never have to deal with (it's such a stereotypical female experience. sometimes I wonder if that's why women rarely like Lovecraft. it's not scary or exciting to them, it's just Tuesday).

But that's just our perception, a trick of light. These are not necessarily gendered.

He also gives an impression of someone extremely vulnerable, yes, but I don't think he handles his vulnerability in a feminine way. He just doesn't hide it and we are used to labeling everything vulnerable as feminine.

He also doesn't really do anything feminine-labeled in a characteristic female way. He isn't really in contact with his emotions (despite having a lot of them), him caring about people takes the form of "protector and provider". his cooking... have you seen his cooking? He doesn't look for support and doesn't try to build things that last. He doesn't accept his vulnerability. If anything, he's trying to pretend he has no vulnerabilities and maybe no psyche at all. He's self-sacrificing in a very male way too. Because he was there and because he could and because it's a cool thing to do.

So he's just that. Himself. Someone outside of gender.

(or rather his gender is knightcore)

If we perceive him as feminine it says more about how our culture perceives gender than about who Childe is.

Also, quoting my previous post, it's a part of him being full of contradictions. For every thing that he does he also does the exact opposite, and this holds for gender too.

Yes he lives the male power fantasy. He also does it in an incredibly feminine way. I think this was Hoyo's original intention and then it blossomed into this human disaster we see.

And to end up on a joke, surely you all have seen that leaked art that is theorised to be Skirk but could have also been an early design of Childe before Hoyo decided to make him a guy.

[yourmomsgranddad]

— 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘 𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃

— CHAPTER TWO: We can stay at home and watch the sunset but I can't help but asking are you bored yet

— SUMMARY: Kate and Y/n's reunion isn't what Kate expects.

— WARNINGS: two curse words i believe, sexual themes but no smut, mention of blood

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!

That was all that was going through Kate's mind right now. Her brain was still trying to comprehend what her mom said but at the time was feeling at the emotions all at once. She wanted to cry, she wanted to rejoice and she definitely wanted to go to the bathroom.

"What do you mean 'she's coming back'?" Kate was trying to make sure she heard her mom right before she flew off the handle.

"Well I guess her and her mom wanted to see New York and she found out we lived here so they are hopping on the first plane and they will be here by tomorrow."

Yup, she heard her completely correctly. Now she could commence her freakout.

She laid on the floor. She wanted to burst into tears but instead her brain was seeing everything, everywhere, all at once. All of her memories of you were rising to the top.

That creaky swing that used to be in your backyard, the way you used to dress, the bright purple you insisted on painting Kate's bedroom by yourselves and ended up being purple for a few months.

She missed you so much. She didn't know what she was worrying about, she was excited to see you again.

"I'm having a party tomorrow night and they're going to be there if you want to come."

Not that excited! She couldn't see you so soon.

"I don't know why I said it like it was your decision. You're coming, I cannot handle Claire by myself."

Claire was your mother and she was like Godzilla and the Boogeyman mixed together. She always enjoyed having Kate in her home but something in her just absolutely couldn't find it to pretend to be nice to Kate's mom.

Kate never understood why she could be so nice to her but not her mom, it didn't make sense. Nevertheless, she definitely could chill things down if she was there.

"Fine. I'll be there." She rolled her eyes. But her mom didn't care, this was a win in her book. She was going to celebrate.

And Kate was about to do something brash, maybe a tattoo?

Could she pull off a bob?

Both answers were a no so she just went to bed. Today was kind of draining even if she barely did anything.

Next day, Kate woke up determined. She was going to dominate this party and see you, and have the best time ever.

Yeah, no, none of that happened.

The moment she got inside the building, all of bodily functions started to act against her. First, her bladder attacked. She had to take the longest piss known to man. She was in the bathroom for like 18 minutes.

No one had seen her in while.

Next, she got a cramp in her knee. That doesn't seem like a problem but this event had no chairs so she had to sit on the floor, not being able to stand up.

And lastly, her nose started bleeding. Like gushing blood. It's like her nose was having a period.

Trying to fish for tissues, she banged her knee against the table. "Ow." Like her night could get any worse.

"Katie?! Why are you on the floor?"

She looked up and it's like someone was just cackling at her, they did not want her to succeed. Surely enough, you were standing above, looking more beautiful than when she last saw you.

Well the last time she saw you, you were like 10 but that doesn't matter because you were here.

"I cwamped my leg and can't stand. And I'm bweeding from the nose." Her words sounded funny since she was full of tissues and a whole lot of blood. You couldn't help but giggle.

"Well either way, it's great to see you." You got down to her level and pulled her into your arms, completely not thinking about the blood.

"Sorry. I got blood on your clothes."

"Wouldn't be the first time."

You situated yourself to sit next to her, getting as close to her as possible. She missed having you this close. She almost thought it was a dream but then you touched her.

She hadn't felt your touch in years. Feeling it again was like eating your favorite food again after a while and finding out you still love it.

"So how are you? Besides having everything happen to you at once."

"The best. Now that you're here." You smiled. You reached forward, helping her release her hand from the blood. Instead, you held them for her.

"Why do I feel like I've seen this before?" Kate's mom popped up, crossing her arms at the two of you. "Our girl's always hurting herself, isn't she?" You scrambled off the floor, going over to her mom for your hug.

Kate couldn't hide the blush that was spreading from hearing you call her 'your girl'. Maybe it was the blood. Who knows?

"So Miss Bishop, how's life? Kate still giving you trouble?" You chuckle, looking back at Kate for a second, who just seemed to be trying to hide her face.

"Always. And I told you, you can call me Eleanor. I've known you for a while." She tried, your hands still in hers.

"I know but you're like my mom, Miss B. And I wouldn't call my mom by her first name." You shrugged.

Kate's brain was making sure to remember every part of this moment, she never wanted to forget when you walked back into your life. (although she was gonna keep out the part where she was laying on the floor and bleeding)

But her thoughts got disrupted when she noticed your mom walking right over to the two of you. Oh no. That brought Kate to her feet, even if she wanted to scream in agony.

"Claire! So lovely to see you!" Kate greeted first. She saw the look on your mom's face, she was unhappy. Kate figured hop on it before she could.

"Katherine! Always a pleasure!" She went in for a hug but then looked down, noticing the way Kate was trying so hard to hop on her other leg. "Oh no! Kate, what happened?" A sudden worry washed over her.

"My body doesn't like me. How are you?" She tried to shift the conversation to her, hoping to forget about her pain.

"Normally fine but this one over here is giving me a run for my money." She gestured to you, looking like something was definitely bothering the two of you. She wanted to ask, but figured she could hear when the two ladies walked away.

And it was like they heard her brain since they walked away, going to talk to someone else, leaving the two of you alone.

"So what was that about?"

You rolled your eyes, not taking your eyes off of your mom, making sure she was far away.

"She is so worried about me. I dropped out of college a few months ago and she thinks I don't have any 'prospects'. She brought me here, hoping your mom could give me a job. She's so annoying."

This was new territory for Kate. She had never heard you speak anything but highly about your mom.

"Well she's right about one thing. My mom will definitely give you that job, she loves you." You smiled and all of a sudden, the pain from her leg vanished. There was something about your smile, it could make the clouds disappear.

"Well I do love your mom."

And there was that shift, that shift that Kate was afraid of, the shift that haunted her dreams. The shift that let her know, things were going to be different now.

She knew once she saw you, it wasn't going to all shiny and rainbows and you would go back into your old routine. You were like 12! You were adults now, things were going to change and she definitely didn't want to them to.

So she tried her hardest to bring the past the present.

"Remember when you glued my hair to my bedroom door?" You looked down, chuckling, you remembered the moment exactly.

"Well it wasn't my fault. You said you were going to tell Jake Faraday that I had a crush on him and you wake up earlier than me. I had to do something to stop you."

"Glue? Really, Y/n? That was your first option." She furrowed her eyebrows, till this day she was still confused about your choice.

"In my defense, it was either glue or attach you to the ceiling and I knew you had a fear of heights. I wanted to send a message, not scare you half-to-death."

Her heart swelled. You remembered her fear after all these years, maybe there was hope for you yet.

So all night, you stayed dormant, reminiscing about everything that the two of you ever did.

The time you crashed the cool kids' party and they called your moms. The day you both went around the arcade, putting your high score on every game. Even the time you both almost met Justin Timberlake.

"Remember when we both got mono from each other?"

Her eyes went wide. Some part of her definitely wanted you to bring it up but something told her it was a bad idea. But here it was. Whether she liked it or not.

"Yeah. Do you know how hard it is to explain to your mother how you and your best friend both have the kissing disease but 'didn't kiss each other'?" You let out a wry chuckle.

"I gotta say Kate, even if you did give me a disease, still one of the best kisses I've ever had."

She froze. The kiss that she was cursing herself for having, the kiss she stayed awake thinking about, the kiss that changed her life, it was the best you had ever had. She didn't know how to process.

But before she could get you to add on, you had to go. Not from the party, just to the bathroom and you would be right back.

She was ask when you came back.

It had been almost 30 minutes and you hadn't came back.

Kate's bleeding stopped and her cramp was retreating. But she was now completely worried about you and she didn't know what to do.

She still saw her mom and yours so you were definitely still here but you could be having issues in the bathroom, something could be wrong and you might need help. She needed to find you.

So she started running around, looking in every bathroom in the building, hoping to find you in one. Even the men's!

Little note, you were not in the men's. I don't know why she thought you would be.

But she had checked every bathroom on the floor the party was on and not one of them had you in them. Maybe you were on a different floor. Maybe you weren't in the bathroom at all. Maybe you were dead!

Kate was thinking about too hard.

You probably went home and couldn't text her since you didn't have her number anymore. Yeah.

She was about to quit her search and go tell her mom she was going home, she served her purpose. If you were gone, chances are your mom was right behind you.

But something stopped her.

She heard moans and groans coming from the closet she was standing next to. At first, she figured someone must be hurt and she was about to burst in there and become Captain Save A Ho.

But as soon as the door swung open, she knew it was the complete opposite. And she looked on with fear.

You were inside the closet with some boy's lips on your neck.

Holy shit.

[divijohm]

hi! can i ask you to write laughing jack's reaction to the fact that fem!reader spends his time with someone else like ben or ticci toby and he is jealous of them. thank you in advance!!

Jealous Laughing Jack

A/n: If it's not involving bodily functions why specify if is fem or male reader? This is a genuine question because I write this headcanons from a mostly gender neutral/non specified perspective. Also I don't see LJ as an agressive/possessive type of jealous, he's more of a "if I'm jealous I'll just assume that I'm not good enough and will disappear from your life" type (no I'm not projecting) so I really hope that that's what you wanted. Enjoy!!

🎪 you get along pretty well with all the pastas but you had an extremely close bond with LJ an Toby. But, since LJ is one of the most busy pastas you ended up spending more time with Toby.

🎪 in a particular quiet month, were LJ didn't have much to do, he noticed that you spend very long time with Toby, he didn't care at first but the more he saw it the more annoyed he became

🎪 He's a very insecure boy deep down, he fears abandonment so much that he abandon a person before they can abandon him. So that's what he did, he stopped talking to you. He assumed that you were abandoning him slowly.

🎪 You didn't really noticed at first of course, you're used to him being away for weeks if not months because of Slenderman missions. But in a particular day, Sally invited you to a tea party and, for your surprise, LJ was there.

🎪 He immediately avoided eye contact with you, and although he desperately wanted to leave, to spare his own feelings, he didn't for Sally's sake. The tea party was in an akward silence during a looooonnnnnnggggg time. Sally noticed it after a few minutes, and made an excuse to leave you two alone, something about getting more cookies.

🎪 "I didn't know you're in the mansion today LJ, you finished slender mission early this time?"

"... It's been a month since I went to the last mission"

"Why I didn't see you around the mansion then?! You could've told me!"

🎪 He stayed quiet for a while after your question, you pressed him for a little bit until he spits out.

" You don't need to pretend to care I know you don't want to spend time with me, you look happier with Toby"

🎪 You're shocked, since when did he feel this way? Why did he think you didn't care about him? You're so confused

🎪 After some time comforting him and trying to understand why he feels this way, you decided to ask an improbable reason to his sadness

🎪 "Jack... Were you jealous of me spending time with Toby?"

".... Yes"

🎪 Oh.. This was new, you've never thought of LJ as a jealous type, you couldn't help but laugh.

🎪 "I've never thought of you as the jealous type Jack, I'm so used to you being out of the mansion and we spending so little time together that I didn't even noticed that, I'm so sorry... I'll try my best to spend more time with you ok?"

".. ok, I forgive you"

🎪 after a bit more of reassurance you hugged him, and right before that hug could become something else, Sally returned

🎪 She apologies for taking too long, and asks if you both are now talking to each other, Wich you respond with a "yes". Sally Smiles and ya'll continue the tea party

🎪 From that day on you made sure to spend time with LJ at least once a day ;)

[trans-wojak]

I'm so tired of trenders telling me "You're just upset because people aren't suffering in the same way you are, thats a really horrible way to think" when I tell them that you need to have dysphoria to be trans and anyone who doesn't and says they're trans is a trender

I'm not angry that they don't have dysphoria as I'd never wish the pain of having gender dysphoria onto someone, I'm more angry that they are pretending to have dysphoria or pretending to be trans and go on stupid rants about how non dysphoric trans people are valid and when providing "proof and research" its a fake article made by another trender and not someone with scientific proof

I don't get why people only call out others who fake DID, autism, depression, tourettes syndrome or something like that (which of course it is very wrong to fake those things and they definitely deserve to be called out) but then they never call out people who fake being transgender

Because we live in an age now where instead of seeing trans people as transsexuals who alter and change their sex, they think we are just masculinised females and feminised males, their argument relies entirely on “let people do what they want with their bodies” - they see it as body modification like getting tattoos, piercings and cosmetic surgeries. While on one hand, that line of thinking does have its place because bodily autonomy is a fundamental human right. But it’s still repackaged transphobic notions, just saying it in a progressive way. That’s why we have moved away from terms like sex change and transsexual, they want us to accept it’s all just cosmetic and not really altering the sex but hormone replacement literally does alter it on a chemical level hence why you have to accept the common “health risks” of a male or female when you sign the consent form. There isn’t that much diff in terms of treatment for most conditions between males/females unless it’s sexual organ based but there is still some nuance to it. Males have higher risk of thickened blood and heart disease, females have higher risks of blood pressure issues and stroke. These things are important to be mindful of cause the risks change when one takes HRT. The body doesn’t function like their birth sex any longer.

And I’ve had similar things said to me too about oh don’t be upset they’re not suffering like you. Like I’m not, I’m just saying we are not the same and grouping people who lack any of the conditions that make one trans with us is more harmful than anything else.

[interlagosed]

I’ve just binge-read all your World Alone stories and now I’m in tears. I loved them all so so so much! I love how you write both Carlos and Lando and adore the world you’ve created. They’re so perfect for each other. 😭😭😭 I’m so emotional right now.

Hope you don’t mind but I have a question, in The Wind-Down you wrote that Charlotte found out about them by accident - what happened? Did she catch them while they were doing it?? And man I love Zak! Their number one shipper. How did he react when they told him during golf? Please please please fill in the gaps for me. I’d love to know!

Can’t wait to reread the stories!

ahh anon!!!! thank you so much for telling me, that makes me so happy! in case you didn't know, i have a lot of little a world alone snippets on tumblr too. you can find them under the /hibi writes tag (amidst all the links to tsor i'm sorry!!). if they're not tagged as any other fic i've written, you can assume they're set in a world alone.

Answering your questions below!

OKAY SO i can't recall if i've confirmed this anywhere but i think charlotte knew for much, much longer than she actually let on. she got ~vibes that they liked each other pretty early on. and then after electricity she kept like. walking into them talking in really quiet tones, super close to one another, or making out after a race somewhere they thought was empty (charlotte has very light foot-falls okay). she gave them every chance to keep hiding it but i think there came a point where she needed one of them for something and carlos wasn't in his driver's room and she was like YOU KNOW WHAT. I DON'T CARE ANYMORE. I NEED TO DO MY GODDAMN JOB. so she made a beeline for lando's room, functionally busted the door open, and when of course she saw a carlos-shaped lump under the blanket she had to pretend to be surprised.

when they told zak during golf, i think he fully tossed his irons into the air with a massive YEEEEEEEEES!!!! and carlos yelped, grabbed lando, and tossed him bodily out of the way so he wouldn't get a concussion from a golf-club related injury.

"I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT WAS JUST A MATTER OF TIME! HA-HA YEAAAAAH!"

"We wanted you to be the first to know-"

"WHEN'S THE WEDDING. CAN I OFFICIATE?"

"We were going to ask you anywa-"

"I DO! I WILL! This is all my doing, you know."

Lando and Carlos smiled at each other and Carlos said, "Yeah. We do."

[companionwolf]

Fill #1 for Flufftober

Prompt: 25. Nook + 29. "Hey, wake up!"

Fandom: XCOM 2

Verse: uh based on my canon? (I'm kin); NOT shipfic

TWs/CWs: None

The Commander drifts.

They know vaguely they lie in the space under the bar where it turns, curled up with their tail over their nose in the little nook.

Central tends the soldiers, thinks his CO can't see him go to nip a drink straight from the vodka bottle, flinches when they growl softly and sets it back down.

They're here on the Avenger in 2035, a few months post freedom. At least, here enough. With their eyes shut and neurons slow, the Commander could be anywhere else. Could convince themselves of it.

They could be back at HQ, taking shelter under the Hologlobe, listening to the idle chatter and noise of the personnel around the room.

They could be on the run, the fire behind their eyes and smoke in their lungs still, pressed close to Central under a rotting blanket as the cold bites at them both through walls of a decaying house.

They could be in the simulation, any iteration of that, tucked away somewhere in the false halls of a false Anthill, taking a moment of respite.

But they're here.

Here in the future, still not quite accustomed to quadrupled form and lack of humanity. Here, where they have lost. Here, where they are still running. Here, where dream and unreality mix with stark cold truth. They wish they knew some much for sure-- what was sim, what wasn't.

All they can do, they suppose, is keep asking.

Did Pettachi ever feed me a spicy thing-- sime kind of prank, a joke? I don't know, Commander. I don't remember those details well anymore. (Mark that one down as a maybe, then.)

Did Rivera save us when base fell? Yes. (Mark that as real.)

I traveled with you, right? Yeah, I got this scar from those days. (Another check mark.)

We had MELD, in 2015? What the hell is MELD, Commander? (A no.)

Central leans against the bar; the Commander, eyes closed, inhales-- his scent mixes with the alcohol and the ship itself, and their heart slows.

Somewhere, they are still human. Somewhere, they are lying on a operating table? Or maybe a strecher. It doesn't matter. What does matter is he is there too, younger but still him, holding their hand.

God, they wish they could smile the way humans do. All they can manage now is a facsimile of it.

Did they want this? They were dying. Did they ask for this? Why was it this, and not...? Their head hurts, sense of phantom pain and ache.

Footsteps, distantly.

The Commander's ears swivel toward them. A rag tag mix of OG A Team and Alpha Squad-- Fisher, Guzman, and Johnson, to be more precise. They come into the bar loud, Johnson and Guzman laughing at something Fisher has said. Central greets them gruffly.

Oh, Central, thinks the Commander. Their heart swells with love for their XO, for their crew. Oh, humanity.

In their chest the thud of a false thing, made to function the same but never falter. Whatever they had first, it's long gone-- the aliens upgraded much of their internals when they were captured. Whatever it took to keep them alive.

The Commander feels a grimace across their face, knows it's not real, knows it's their human mind covering the reality of their pseudo canine face up because otherwise they'd be barely functional, they'd be lost to themselves entirely.

They mentioned this to Tygan once. "It's covering everything up," they'd said. "Pretending nothing's different." They guess it's too much to ask their mind to adjust so quickly. They spent less than a year in this form before they got caught, before the tank, the simulation.

And in there? They aren't sure what they were, human or this, whatever this is they are now.  They remember being on all fours in some of the hazy bits and pieces, but is that real, or just through the filter of their current self perception?

The Commander thinks.

They don't see themselves as bodily human. There is no overlay of a human self-- their mind is not that desperate. Sometimes it is, like with facial expressions and the sense of missing hands, but usually their self maps properly. 

To be honest, they weren't ever really that comfortable in a human body at all. It was fine, they mean. It was a okay body. A good body. Just not quite right. Just not really theirs, them.

The bark of Guzman's laughter brings them back. The Commander imagines they hang on her mirth like a lifeline. She centers them here, with the sound of her living and breathing and--

Central's voice calls down to them: "Hey, wake up."

The Commander opens a eye, looks up at him. He's studying them, a expression they can't read on his face.

They unfurl slowly, stretching as best they can in the small space, brushing against his legs. "What do you need, Central?"

"Fisher wants you," he says.

The Commander snorts, stands and shakes themselves as if they're drying off from being wet. The collar Guzman gave them jangles.

"What does he need, then?" they ask.

Central shrugs. "Something about a bet."

They roll their eyes. Or at least it feels like they do. Isn't that the same thing, in the end?

"Oh goodie, I love when my soldiers have scores to settle," the Commander says through a yawn.

They see Central shift uncomfortably, don't understand why--

"Sometimes I forget," he says, mostly to himself.

But they hear it. Of course they can hear it. Their head hurts; they feel like they can feel the inner mechanics of their throat, the voicebox, the connections. Obviously they can't. But they feel it anyway. A glitch in their mind's erratic defenses.

The Commander takes a breath-  false air into false lungs; everything a facade of a biological system, all tailor made to keep the brain running.

"Okay, let's go see what the Wonder Ranger wants," they say, half to Central and half themselves.

When they glance back at him as they come out from behind the bar and apporaches Fisher, the Commander sees Central lean forward, his eyes flicking from them to the younger troops, back and forth, taking in the situation.

Something about knowing he's got their back, just like after base fall, just like during the transplant, makes them breathe a little easier.

He's here. The soldiers are here.

They're here.

That must mean something.

[apportioned-abortion]

I don't have a coherent point here I'm getting at, but I hate the way we are as women and we as a culture are completely alienated from pregnancy.

I am happy for declining birthrates, I am happy for birth control, I am happy for women having more economic and social freedom and less unwanted pregnancies. I am not advocating for more. The cultural attitude and dismissal of pregnancy though is so absurd though when you think about it.

The time I was pregnant, it became my personality and identity to other people. I wasn't a person, I was a pregnant woman. Either the other person ONLY talked about my pregnancy and nothing else or pointedly ignored the fact that I was pregnant and refused to acknowledge anything that goes with it. I had to answer questions about my pregnancy with every new stranger or acquaintance, and god forbid I were to complain. Every time I see a pregnant woman now, I offer her the barest sympathy and acknowledgement that it's a hard time for HER without mentioning the baby, and it's like she wakes up mid-conversation and comes alive.

People are so easily able to pretend there are no differences in the sexes when the only exposure they've had to pregnancy is when they were 4 and their mom was having a sibling. With so many childfree women, childfree couples, and women who would never conceive of having a baby for themselves, I think it's easy to forget how big of a difference the ability to gestate a human makes between men and women.

With surrogacy and IVF making it more like an outsourced process than a human bodily function, with pregnant women not being visible in media or in real life (how often when you go get groceries or whatever is there a pregnant women there?), pregnancy becomes a forgettable backdrop.

In having a baby, the most traumatic experience I have ever encountered, I was the supporting character in my own trauma to everyone else. AND I had it very mild compared to stories of other women. You typically don't get treated like a roadblock to accessing your cast when you get foot surgery, you actually get proper care and acknowledgement that what you went through was traumatic or difficult. Following a birth, the new mother is typically treated like a whiny inconvenience who is hoarding her baby, but also a selfish bitch for being in pain, or wanting anyone to even look at her, or have needs.

In practice, many feminist spaces are made up of women who don't have children (for good reason!) and the negative attitude towards the role of motherhood often gets displaced to mothers themselves without self-reflection, or the needs of mothers are absent from discussion. I think also there is this attitude of "since all the right/anti-feminist people talk about how women should be mothers, they are pro-mother and mother's rights are being acknowledged by them" when that is the furthest thing from the truth.

It's just depressing. Pregnant women and mothers are talked around and used an debate points without regard to the women themselves way too often, and the lack of visibility of pregnant women and mothers (who are usually found socially only WITh groups of other pregnant women and mothers due to the high needs of being primary caretakers for children and social ostracization), contributes to this a lot.

[mrsmarymorstan]

Disability isn't a dirty word needs to be a new slogan or something. I'm like you, I have a chronic illness from birth. It has caused multiple physical birth defects, a learning disability, infertility, and affects a lot of my physiological functions - but people will say to my face when I talk about my medical history "it's not a disorder". It is! Like they think having a medical issue means there's something wrong with me as a person, instead of just my body. It's really weird how many allies think they do us a favor by saying that our disabilities aren't disabilities! Ok so then they aren't fighting to refuse stigma? They aren't fighting for better healthcare? They're one step away from telling a person with cancer it's all in their head and a person who uses a wheelchair to leave it at home????

Being disabled SUCKS! No two ways about it, but that doesn't mean we're not allowed to identify as disabled or treat it like it's bad.

It makes you feel like it's some sort of moral failing, rather than a bodily one.

My Dad apologises any time he refers to me as disabled and like... I'm on Personal Independent Payment? The NHS sent me a PCR Test in the post so I can diagnose myself ASAP. I'm on 7 different types of meds a day.

I don't think we can pretend that I'm "differently abled" or whatever... I have been full on nuked and pretending that I'm fine and dandy does fuck all to help me.

[blackswallowtailbutterfly]

I identify with a lot of the tenants of radical feminism but I find it really off putting that most tumblr radical feminists spend their time arguing with and about transwomen. Being trans in our current culture involves being a target. I don't think people would choose to go through transitioning and accepting the risk of not being able to use the bathroom in public, being assaulted or killed, or being seen widely as an outcast, just because they want unfettered access to women's spaces.

Well, the reason transwomen come up as a subject so often is that unfortunately, many of them do want completely unrestricted access to women’s spaces. They’ve tried to shut down the Vancouver Women’s Library because it had books they didn’t like. One, operating under a fraudulent organization, stole money from the Women’s March. Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival had to shut down because of what happened when they came in (they were never prevented from coming, but simply discouraged because Michfest focused on very female-specific experiences). They ejaculated on posters, intimidated women with spears, and one of them eventually went on to murder a lesbian couple as well as their son. It’s rumoured that one of the couple had rejected his advances. The Cotton Ceiling, coined by a trans pornstar and unchallenged by most transwomen, involves coercing lesbians into sex they don’t want, at the threat of being called bigots or “TERFs” if they refuse. So we don’t want them in our spaces, and lesbians in particular don’t want them in theirs.

Being visibly trans can indeed make someone a target but so is being visibly female, which is something one usually can’t hide. The thing about transition is that it’s taken on a very different meaning from what it once did. Trans people used to be people with sex dysphoria who were so uncomfortable with their sex that they sought surgery to make themselves appear more like the opposite sex. Indeed, sex-dysphoric people are still present in the trans community, however the trans movement has largely been taken over by non-dysphoric cross-dressing males (often not even that: see “Danielle” Muscato) who are more than happy to keep their penises and instead externalize their supposed dysphoria onto female organs instead of their own male ones. Hence transwomen who will claim that the mere mention of female organs or bodily functions is triggering to them, but they have no problem sending rape threats to women, directly involving their penises. Such transwomen have a special word for trans people who are dysphoric and see the identification with trans by non-dysphoric people as an appropriation: truscum.

Now, as it happens, white transwomen are actually less likely to be murdered than white women. Transwomen of colour are at much higher risk, and that’s largely because many of them have to resort to prostitution, which, in spite of all the libfem sex pozzie shit that will make it seem otherwise, is extremely dangerous. And there are far more women of colour in prostitution than there are transwomen of colour.

But why can’t we just let dysphoric transwomen into women’s spaces then? Well, one problem is that the trans movement has made that impossible. Any “gatekeeping” at all is seen as transphobic. A male need only say they’re a woman, and they must be taken at their word or it is bigotry. Another problem is that a longterm study of transwomen, before and after transition, showed that their rate of violent crime is the same as men. Therefore, even truly dysphoric transwomen present exactly the same threat to women as men do.

So should transwomen just be forced to risk their safety by going to the bathroom with men? Well it turns out that very few anti-trans attacks occur in men’s restrooms. On the other hand, there have been quite a few assaults and sexual assaults by transwomen* on women and girls in restrooms, shelters, and locker rooms. Of course, a solution to this is that, where possible, there should be a gender neutral restroom. But the trans movement often protests this because transwomen say they “won’t feel like women”.

So to be perfectly honest, I wish we didn’t have to focus on transwomen, but unfortunately they are very focused on us and we cannot afford to ignore that.

*Many of these assaults were simply committed by men in women’s clothing. They may not have been part of the trans movement at all (though several have been), but since, as mentioned earlier, the trans movement wants everyone to accept that any one who identifies as trans is trans, that any male using the women’s washroom is a woman, then there are no men who pretend to be transwomen; they are transwomen because they claimed to be or because they present as such. The trans movement cannot have it both ways like they want. Either everyone who claims to be or presents as trans is trans, which means every single rapist, murderer, and physical assailant who has claimed to be or presented as trans is, and the trans movement must deal with their own shit before coming after “TERFs”. Or the trans movement must accept that not everyone who claims to be trans is, which means they must accept that some gatekeeping does have to happen, and not just for trans, but for whomever claims to be a woman beyond being biologically female as well.