#or yknow having healthy coping mechanisms

[thevoidbutwithselfesteemissues]

Am I doing better because I'm back to reading angst and crying?

Or

Am I doing worse because I'm back to reading angst and crying?

Who knows!

Certainly not me.

[hermanunworthy]

(strokes normals cheek) hey baby normal? its gonna be alright

[frogbi]

Genuinely the worst thing about moving back in with my parents have been having to give up all my coping mechanisms because none of them were things i'd want my parents to know or suspect

[gravityidol]

my grandma emotionally traumatised me from a young age so now i traumatise her with ensemble stars lore

[antiendovents]

I really hate endos for a more personal reason. Yknow besides the blatantly obvious stuff of that they spread misinfo.

So when we first came to terms with the fact that we were a system (DX’d at 15, didn’t accept it until 19) we were mislead by the endogenic community. We were made to believe that because we didn’t remember our childhood trauma and only remembered our teenage trauma that we were endogenic. But that was far from the truth and we eventually remembered our childhood trauma and whooooo boy… we’re 22 nearly 23 now and definitely do not agree with endos these days.

Anyways thank you for your blog it helps me get sh*t (idk if you care about swearing) off my chest

- 🤡

the endo community can be really harmful like that. It's all based in misinformation and it leads to this echo chamber of spreading more and more misinformation, convincing others that they're trauma isn't enough or that it doesn't exist at all just because they don't remember it, ect. It can really fuck up someone's mental health and their perception of themselves. Yes, some endos use it as a coping mechanism, but it's not healthy and it's hurting people other than just themselves. I'm so sorry that happened to you and I'm glad you seem to have figured some things out

((also thank you! I made this blog for that reason specifically lol! And i don't mind swearing!))

[lollytea]

You said that asks may help you formulate your au thoughts and prompt you to talk about it so if it helps- I'm very curious about the cliffhanger the last lore dump left us on, re: Luz! Very curious to see how she fits into all of this. Sidenote about hunters deal: is Belos like. A stagemom in this au? A stage uncle? Highly entertaining if so. Demoted in power but still just as evil

Hmm!! Yeah I think it would absolutely be easier to drop info about the AU in little bits at a time depending on what questions I get. I've already thought about almost everybody in this AU and where they're situated but I guess I was getting overwhelmed with thinking about writing it all down at once.

Anyways!! Miss Luz Noceda!!

In this universe, the "fancy hospital" was located in California so Luz and her parents packed up and moved from Conneticut when she was a little kid. Her Dad Manny spent a few years drifting away, slowly at first, and then all at once. And Luz, a girl who's already a bright and imaginative storyteller, falls deeply in love with the fantasy book he left her.

What begins as a healthy coping mechanism devolves into escapism as Luz desperately clings to fiction in order to endure the difficulty of real life. School is hard, making friends is hard and nobody really understands her hobbies and passions, not even her mom (Even if she tries. She tries so hard.)

Living on the outskirts of the world of showbusiness, Luz quickly takes an interest in the magic of the screen. More than anything else, Luz wants to create. And creation comes in many forms and she has no intention of being confined to just one. Luz wants to be an actor, a writer, a director, an artist, an animator, a singer, a dancer, etc etc.

It's when her mom Camila finally puts her foot down and insists that Luz needs to learn to separate fantasy from reality, that her life really kicks off.

The Reality Check Center, an after school program which Luz is meant to attend every week day at 3:30pm sharp.

But after meeting somebody special, this is not where Luz goes every day after school.

Instead, Luz is hanging out in the house of Edalyn Clawthorne, an ex-starlet who Luz recognized on sight as Hecate in the 1980s Azura film adaption.

It's always been a mystery why Eda did not reprise her role for any of the sequels/spinoffs that Hollywood churned out for years afterwards. But upon meeting her and learning a little more of her story, Luz learns the truth from behind the scenes.

Eda has a chronic autoimmune disease and she was considered too "inconvenient" to have as a star of the franchise, so she was quietly let go after the first film released. She hasn't acted since and really has no intention of returning to that life.

Luz idolizes Eda and quickly latches on to her, demanding that she be her mentor and show her the ropes of showbiz. Eda hems and haws for a while before being worn down by Luz's persistent enthusiasm.

Luz meets Willow when the latter is trying to talk herself out of having a complete meltdown and the two quickly bond over being a pair of neurodivergent academically and socially challenged silly billies.

Willow is weak for pretty girls so she lets Luz talk her into sneaking her on set. Predictably, Luz causes havoc and gets banned from the premises within a few hours.

But that's okay! Because guess what! Turns out Luz is a perfect third musketeer for the funky little friend group Willow and Gus already had going on.

Luz does tons of stuff. She writes fanfiction. She has several notebooks full of anime art. But most notably, she has a YouTube channel.

Remember mid 2000s YouTube? Before it became the corporate husk that it is today? Back when it was just kids dicking around and posting their dumb silly vlogs.

Thats what Luz does. She posts dumb silly vlogs. She infodumps to the camera about her interests, she films herself while she's out with her friends. She just has fun, yknow?

Willow and Gus have fun too. Considering they are featured in like 90% of Luz's videos, laughing and joking around with her. But thats not all they do.

Willow, who has spent several months being the butt of the joke in the the Hexside show, is experiencing what it's like to be behind a camera while being respected and loved.

Willow is an exceptionally talented rollerskater. So of course Luz is filming her do tricks around the skatepark, whooping and hollering and chanting her name. Willow has a huge interest in botany. And superhero comics. And photography. And romcoms. And Luz will let her share fun facts about her interests, or maybe even babble for a bit, and Luz will act as though she's privileged to speak to a professor of the subject. It makes Willow blush and giggle, pretending it's not a big deal.

It's a huge deal actually.

It's through Luz's vlogs that Willow's authentic personality finally bleeds through the screen. Willow Park is not Paulina. She's not ditzy. She's not unobservant. She's something else entirely.

Willow Park is soft spoken but opinionated. She is witty and expressive. She's tough and sporty. She's wise beyond her years. She's wild and mischievous. She's sweet and silly. She's so many things that she'll make your head spin.

The scripts of the final Hexside S1 episodes are beginning to trickle out around this time and honestly? The writers are sick of Paulina. They're tired of the character. They're tired of the "She's stupid" joke. They feel like they've hit a brick wall with her, in a creative sense. But now they have Season 2 to work on and...ugghhh...

That's when one writer just happens to stumble across TheGoodWitchLuzura on YouTube and finds two young actors that they know very well, just existing outside of the set.

Willow is different on Luz's videos. While on set around the likes of Amity and Adrian, she simply keeps quiet, keeps her head down and does what she's told. She doesn't really spark any inspiration, yknow?

But after seeing this? This bright, sharp witted, skater girl on a griny camera recording? Well after seeing that, they really start feeling the urge to maybe spruce up Paulina's character a bit. Make her a little more compelling.

So, in that way, Luz Noceda completely changed Willow Park's life.

Willow still doesn't think she believes in God but if angels exist, Luz is definitely one of them.

If you said this to Luz, she'd disagree. She'd prefer to be a Demon >:3

________

ANYWAY!! On to the Belos question.

See, I think I'm going to take inspiration from the show's canon version of the Wittebane family as an endless cycle of pain and suffering.

Philip and Caleb Wittebane were a pair of orphan boys that managed to somehow weasel their way into the spotlight at an early age. It fed them well. It kept a roof over their heads. So that meant that this was a nice life, right?

The two brothers were considered timeless stars and their names would go down in history as some of Hollywood's finest.

In the year 1990, Caleb Wittebane was found dead in his home at the age of 30. Based on the evidence, it appeared he had taken his own life.

Philip was then given custody of his brother's infant son and promised that the boy would be raised to understand just what a wondrous legacy his father left behind.

Caleb Wittebane may have been buried 6ft under but Philip had no intention of letting him die. His DNA was still preserved, attached to this fat clump of an infant.

This baby was Caleb's second chance to live. Philip was going to make sure his stupid brother made the right choices this time.

Caleb wasn't going to throw it all away this time. Philip wouldn't let him.

[sa1808fi]

Ok counterpoint to your recent post: being bi doesn't mean you exclusively only like one gender. I'm saying this as someone who is bi lmao, I can see why you think that way but it's generally kinda biphobic to say we're unable to love nb ppl or that we pay extra attention to gender. Over time, the description for bi and pan became so closely interconnected they practically mean the same thing. You just pick which one you feel more ig

Personally I hc emmet and rex as bi exactly for the "i dont rlly care what gender you are" reason. And also projecting but that's another topic entirely

Headcanoning chars as pan when they're sweet and bubbly is also...iffy. ngl. Like I've seen that a lot in 2015 tumblr but generally ppl lately agreed your sexuality has nothing to do with your personality. Like how ppl used to hc closed-off characters as aro...it just gave off stinky vibes iykwim

Sorry for the rant I'd just rather set the records straight lol

Esp since like, even if sexuality WAS somehow connected to personality, the "he's kind so he's pan" falls apart anyway when you remember rex exists NFNCNFBF

I'm not going to sit here attacking headcanons we all see the same characters differently and that's fun but it's more about the...reasoning for it, yknow?

/nm, just to clarify

Tbh this was just my own attempt to kind of justify the pan headcanon, I just get that vibe from him so I'm not entirely sure how to explain it.

I am aware of how bi is liking multiple genders! I definitely did not mean for the post to come off like that, It was just a way for me to try and explain my own thoughts.

I mean you do raise some good points that I do agree with, and I really did not mean for it to seem like I'm basing his sexuality on his personality. Again just me and my rambles.

Emmet just loves lots of things, I mean like, he loves Planty in a both cute and really unhealthy way (but we're not gonna get into that here). It is... a plant.

For Rex though, I mean sure he doesn't really show his love for others as much as Emmet does, but I do think that he does still have some of that really strong love and care for things. it's just trauma and repression have thrown any form of a healthy coping mechanism he had out the window and into the abyss.

I mean have you seen the scenes with him and the raptors?? He cares about them so much it's adorable. My guy looked devastated in the second movie when they got kidnapped by the systarians.

And there's the really complex love he has with his past self too! (Mind you this is not a rexmet post, we're not going there) He does want to protect Emmet from getting hurt like he was, but he also really hates the way he used to act, so he tried to subtly change Emmet into him.

But yeah, very sorry for the misunderstanding.

[spicyicymeloncat]

Yknow something that gets me abt certain fanon depictions of kai is that he’s portrayed with no sense of self preservation, as if he’s self sacrificing and burned out, and I think I dislike it bc it feels like the opposite of his character most of the time.

Yeah some of the actions he takes are harmful to himself in some way, but it’s never intended to, they were ways of coping and making himself feel better.

Like the green ninja plot, he is insecure in his place, so he strives for the highest title to make him feel better.

The red shogun isn’t him beating himself up and not caring about his own well being. He was winning fights, fully engaging in the job, taking his frustration out on others and drinking away his issues, and yeah there’s self loathing in that, but there’s also him trying to make himself feel better, to redirect hurt away from himself.

Him prematurely concluding his parents were the bad guys in s7, is (imo) his way of rationalising his mixed feelings, in order to keep himself okay.

He’s not a reckless war machine who throws himself into battle with no hesitation, he tries to keep himself safe.

Kai is self-prioritised and yknow I think people in general really demonise that kinda of trait both in fiction and irl and that’s actually kind of harmful. The self sacrificial trait is so grossly over romanticised and idk it’s a breathe of fresh air when you see a character who doesn’t start out that way or end that way. Like nothing wrong with that trait being written, it’s just like sometimes it feels like people are only allowed to prioritise themselves if they previously have no sense of self care, bc then it’s seen as a healthy improvement. But in any other case, it means you’re selfish and that’s a bad thing apparently.

Like no. Being selfish and loving yourself and thinking you are hot shit and the smartest person alive and prioritising things that make you happy. None of that makes you evil or morally wrong. If in attempts to meet your needs you try to hurt someone else, or end up hurting yourself, then the action you took was bad but the intent isn’t! Fuck the media that finds people loving themselves as immorally wrong! Fuck it! It is not sexy to hate yourself actually.

I want more fanon Kais indulge in activities that make him happy, Kais that make bad decisions in trying to protect himself and Kais that have good coping mechanisms because he’s still trying to protect himself he’s just found better ways of doing it.

Bc it’s canon and it feels like it gets erased a bit because people somehow don’t find self love appealing unless the character was self hating first.

[mojaves]

seb question: has he ever taken his cat out for a walk. what would his ex think about his cat. what's seb's favorite thing to do during his free time

it's more a case of has mr stromboli ever taken him for a walk. and the answer is yes. if he sees something he wants he is Dragging seb there immediately, even if it means dragging the poor man across the ground. mr stromboli isn't even a particularly Strong cat by any means. seb just HAS to go along with it or he will start screaming the walls down.

as much as alana [seb's ex-wife!!!!] would like cats, she would NEVER!!! want one herself. because of the time and effort and money and the cat hairs and the litter boxes and. basically if he got mr stromboli while they were together, she would have complained the ENTIRE time and he wouldve only been allowed in one room in the apartment and seb would have to do EVERYTHING [which he wouldve been more than happy to do!!!] which also includes removing every single individual cat hair from the whole apartment because she's "allergic" [clearly a lie but seb would fall for it. unfortunately]. basically. visually?? alana would adore mr stromboli, but in any other way she would hate that little round beast. which is the highest form of disrespect, to seb.

seb has a lot of little hobbies!! namely making jewellery out of little bits of wire and nails and bolts etc etc. lots of very intricate metalworking!! my Favourite example of this is the fact that he made his and his husband's engagement/wedding rings out of two bullets [that said husband, cassidy, tried to kill him with!! but he missed <333 TWICE!!!! and thats how they first met!] which is honestly such a fun thing to think about on its own,, the weight behind it,,, but thats not what this question is about. ANYWAY. he also does bits of woodworking, playing the piano or guitar, and fixing up old cars! he just needs to keep his hands busy at all tikmes, because if theyre busy, then his brain is also busy, so he's far less likely to slip into a dissociative state of sorts, bc that could end badly for him. this also turns into him forcing himself to stay busy doing things almost 24/7 which is NOT!! healthy. it just allowed him to push all his problems to the side so he didnt have to deal with them. very bad coping mechanism! i mean he was having fun but. at what cost. yknow.

[neuroticboyfriend]

beating addiction also is just 10x worse if you're not in a positive environment. do what you can, but it's understandable that you're having a harder time of it surrounded by individuals or situations not conducive to you developing healthy coping mechanisms and actually, yknow, recovering

yeah, that's true... thank you. hopefully i can get into a better environment sometime next year.

[vulcan-moon]

Yknow, its completely up to you if you want to answer this or not. But.

I always believed people with similar troubles understand each other to an extend others cant do. Your art, the way you draw, I don't know, it tells a story that is too familiar to me, too close to home. Not that it got any better for me, Im trying to clean up still an addict some might say. But thank you. I also really hope you're okay. 🫶

i think there is a kind of solidarity in being able to recognise in other ppls art similar experiences. i hope it does get better for you - even if you look at yourself now and compare it to where you were last year, any improvement is improvement. i am reluctantly accepting myself that healing takes a long, long time. i'm as okay as i can be right now, i'm learning to use healthy coping mechanisms like art and writing as an outlet, but it's always going to be a journey and i'm always going to have bad days. i'm learning too that there's no one right way that recovery looks like.

[doueverwonder]

lotussssss.

At least the 2 times I wrote Ludwig as a child idk I have a soft spot for him being sickly and quiet and like, he already got a stick in his ass. Your thoughts on this.

I'll show you the two little things I wrote for it if you want.

Okay I want to see them regardless, but u have enabled me to talk about this.

Ludwig I don't think was generally a sick kid once he turned about 6-ish. For the whole confederation of the Rhine, and the first few years of the German Confederation he was. And then dude was just completely out of it for the whole seven weeks of well... the seven weeks war. But besides that I think he was a decently healthy kid--yknow barring the side effects from the fact that his toys probably had lead paint on them.

He was kinda quiet ngl, but in a normal weird little kid quiet way. And compared to how much Liechtenstein talks--not much--his parents didn't think anything off about him.

for the Lutz being strict thing I have a long explanation that constitutes Gilbert being a Not Great Dad but not in a malicous way in a "I want the best for you but unfortunately I'm not always the best at knowing what that is"

bc Roderich and Erzsébet wanted Ludwig to have as normal a childhood as possible, but once the seven weeks war happened (when Ludwig was 14-15 somewhere around there) and they no longer had a say Gilbert got very strict in an attempt to keep Ludwig safe. Eventually the strictness of this routine became an almost unhealthy coping mechanism. Ludwig doesn't want to be as strict as he is but he was inadvertently convinced if he leaves the routine the sky will come tumbling down.

and the thing is I think Gilbert on some level is still convinced he did the right thing because hey Lutz is still alive isn't he?

[thereareeyesinsidethetrees]

thinking about the ship thing i did a while ago and realizing i completely forgot to talk about fiddauthor (said i would talk about regardless of if anyone mentioned it or not and simply. did not do that)

so here we go quick fire

ive said before that they have issues that could make the relationship not really work that well- so here are some of said issues:

-fiddleford has unhealthy coping mechanisms/methods of dealing with problems. he would rather hide/forget an issue than confront it, which directly lead to him hurting himself and ford, and indirectly lead to him hurting the entire town

-both are bad at communicating with each other. understandable, but still something they would need to work on for a relationship to actually, yknow, work

-about the time they meet, ford is absolutely not ready for a relationship. the guy can barely take proper care of himself, let alone an entire other human (everything that happened with stan would likely not help with this)

of course, they are both very fond of each other. ford doesnt seem to hold any resentment towards fiddleford, in regards to the memory gun. likewise, fiddleford immediately forgives ford once they see each other again for the first time in thirty years. they are back on speaking terms pretty quickly afterwards

it could work. it just wouldnt at all be perfect, yknow? (someone who knows more about healthy relationships could probably go into more detail about that, but i am not that someone)

what do i personally think of it?

romantic fiddleford: not something i will ever be interested in

queerplatonic fiddleford: not fond of it all the time, but i have grown to like it a tad more over time

[cardboard-queen]

i’ve realized that i have a very strong ‘gimme positive stimulation’ response to stress.

i may not even consciously know i’m stressed. but my body will call out to me:

“hey. i need something. i wanna smoke something. drink something. bite something. someone. feel someone. something. anything. now.”

and like. it’s a constant uphill battle, finding ways to re-direct that stress response into healthy coping mechanisms, yknow?

i’ve found exercise is by far the most helpful thing for me. but that’s just like. not practical all the time. i can’t workout at 1 am lol.

neither is removing the source of the stress. sometimes you have some control over it. other times u don’t.

anyway. art kinda helps. journaling helps. stretching and breathing exercises often help. reading is nice but doesn’t make it go away.

i think it’s about re-directing the stress. sitting with it, and putting that energy into something tangible. i think that’s really important for me.

[artemis-moon101]

ERM. so. yeahhh

i feel like i should update on the situation.. OBVIOUSLY I DO NOT STAND WITH WILBUR. FUCK HIM 🖕🖕🖕 AND SUPPORT SHELBY ‼‼

BUT ☝ i will be joking about the situation

i COMPLETELY understand if you do not want to see that. it is NOT a situation that should be joked about IN FRONT OF THE VICTIMS AND PERSECUTORS. important part.

luckily for me whomever, neither wilbur, shelby, or anyone else he's harmed is (as we know of) on tumblr. or ever going to find my posts!

this is how i COPE. i know thats a common excuse, or whatever. that doesn't mean i don't stand with the victims or dont despise william. that guy sucks.

not to be that person but i kind of always knew it. we all did. i have messages from last year talking about how if i ever met him i'd probably hate him. but now that theres like- defining proof of evidence that hes genuinely hurt people and is more than just an overall prick, i cant support him any longer.

but as i was saying, i am going to joke about it. thats part of my process. let me explain

so how i "grieve" if you can even call it that is honestly not that weird. probably not healthy but yknow. obviously those are those stages like that guy said, i have all of those. but! ☝ theres a secret 6th stage i call "removing all emotion from it so i cant get hurt" that often manifests in "comedy". humor as a coping mechanism! wild! never heard of it before! (sarcasm)

i dont want to hurt people, i really dont. so PLEASE if you are made uncomfortable by my behaviors unfollow or block me. this is my (brain's) way of making sure i cant get hurt anymore, and i know its probably not healthy but i can talk about that with my therapist. its not your job to tell what and what is not a healthy coping mechanism. i do not know you.

i am a random 13 year old on the internet holding on to any strings i can to stay as stable as possible. do not cut the strings and tell me you are helping

oh and im reclaiming since i saw vienna. yeah thats my song now. im pretty sure he said ycgma belongs to the fans now anyways. im denouncing the rest of them and lovejoy too ofc. oh and around the pomegranate since thats about technoblade.

FUCK YOU WILLIAM GOLD 🖕🖕🖕🖕

[haunted-house-heart]

the raven boys (blue included) & gender headcanon, random headcanon, and also your favorite headcanon about each of em

edit i just realized i misread this so favorite and random are all piled into one 😌

mags i owe you my LIFE i've been trying to get asks all day 😭

also love this one bc you know i have gender hcs for all of them

ok so!

for blue:

gender: i saw a fic once where blue was amab but her moms like, knew psychically that she would be trans and just raised her very like neutrally gender-wise and i love that. anyway i hc blue as nonbinary transfem

favorite hc: ok i have my many mental health hcs for all the gangsey including! all of them are autistic but blue was the only one raised in a house that was 1) also nd 2) knowledgeable about autism and 3) like, positive, about it? like accepting and encouraged stimming and helpful coping mechanisms and such. yknow. like decent parents would. related to this i think she would teach the rest of the gangsey healthy coping mechanisms and how to like, embrace their autism. and like makes/finds them little fidget toys and such.

ALSO i think she takes them all thrifting. (i'm """writing""" a fic about that but it's uhhh. not goin alsksls)

OH OH ALSO she uses forearm crutches she's hypermobile (like me) :3

gansey:

gender: i think for a while gansey is the Token CisTM friend of the group before having a HUGE gender crisis and figuring out he's genderfluid.

favorite: i think that when gansey, blue, and henry go on their roadtrip gansey grows his hair out. i also think that blue lets him try out one of her chew necklaces and he ends up always having one with him to chew on when he's reading

ronan:

gender: oh you just KNOW this boy's trans. he's full of rage, secrets, AND he shaved his head. he's transmasc. and i know 100% that niall was shitty about it and aurora was so accepting but very confused. declan pays for his hormones/top surgery but other than that they don't talk about it. matthew always finds little trans colored things to give to ronan.

favorite: as always, he's autistic. i think when blue first brings it up he gets really upset (so do adam and gansey when she talks to them but ronan gets particularly riled by it) but blue just starts listing out all the symptoms and after stewing in it for awhile ronan goes and talks to her about it. or OR maybe noah calms him down and tells him he's also autistic and helps hin come to terms.

ALSO ronan and blue are absolute besties but they'll NEVER admit it. i also think blue ronan and noah have a groupchat for memes and making fun of gansey and lusting over him and adam. any time blue mentions henry ronan starts spamming the murder squash song

oh ALSO blue gets him a chew bracelet and he thinks it's so stupid until he finds himself just gnawing on it constantly

adam:

gender: either transmasc or amab nonbinary <3

favorite: oh he def has trauma related to being an autistic child in an abusive home. he's so fucking repressed oh my god this boy has not stimmed openly in so fucking long. he would take five minutes before school in his room to stim like mad and then that was it for the day (this isn't what i used to do i'm not projecting what-)

also he has chronic pain related to nerve damage <3

also he's bipolar and ocd because i said so <3

noah:

gender: nonbinary!!!!! agender!!!!!!!!! also not gender but!!! aro! ace! noah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

favorite: oh god ok. he's my favorite so. he's committed to the bit first and foremost. i think he loves cats and that a stray starts hanging around monmouth and noah just LOVES them. when he was alive he was a red and black flannel, red converse, and backwards baseball hat kinda guy. buttons everywhere. he loves glitter (canon but still). i think he loves thrifting w blue and picking out the ugliest clothes to make her laugh. i think he's the only one besides her that already knew he was autistic and i think he family was kind but not very informed so they just paid for fancy tutors and shit. he loves stimming esp vocally and anything that clicks. he's a cuddler even though he's so so cold. he loves cheese but is lactose intolerant. he FREAKED when he heard mcr came back like i think he prolly busted all the lights in monmouth. he's the friend that's always cold (ik he's cold bc hes a ghost but he was always cold when he was alive too). he loves stimming with crunchy glitter slime. also i think he prolly had to wear a knee brace from a skateboarding injury

ok i have been typing since i got the notif about your ask so i'ma wrap this up and i'll prolly rb and add henry onto this later

ily and thank you so so SO much for the ask <3333333