#otherwise how you see my theme is how it should behave for you

[gamebunny-advance]

New Theme

On a whim, I decided to redo the desktop themes for this blog and @gamebunny-color-sp (maybe others too).

The old one had pretty much everything I liked in a theme: a search bar, a pagination in the sidebar where you can jump ahead multiple pages, little empty space, etc.

But, one thing it doesn't do well is accommodate how I write entire posts in the tags: they look pretty bad scrunched together, and often times they got so long that they appear behind other posts.

It also behaved strangely for audio posts made after tumblr's major updates, and posts with in-line videos.

This new theme fixes those problems and still has most of what I liked from the old one. I don't like that the pagination is at the bottom, but such as it is.

I think I worked out most of the aesthetic stuff, and I didn't notice any other major problems, but if you notice anything "off," please let me know, and I'll see if it's something I can fix~

[aaagustd]

make it cute | jjk (m)

title: make it cute pairing: jeon jungkook x (f)reader genre/rating: smut, pwp, 18+ summary: if jungkook loans someone money, he expects to be paid with just that. but tonight, he just might make an exception. wc: 1.8k warnings: infidelity, swearing, mentions ransoms and everything that comes with that (threats, m*rder, etc), pictures??, consensual g*n play (more like oral but yeah), sloppy bl*wjob/deep throating, consent bc it's sexy, pet names, degradation, m*sturbation, facial c*m shot, dirty talk, slight power play dynamics, Dom/sub themes, obedience kink, hair pulling, face f*cking, that should be all release date: september 21st, 2024; 10:18pm est

note: reposting this baby. it’s from the old aaagustd account. i hope y’all enjoy the new version. divider credit.

"That’s it. Keep going until I tell you to stop."

Jungkook can feel the material of his pants stretching to accommodate the growing boner pressing against the fabric. One wrong jerk of his hips, and he fears the measly button and zipper securing his trousers will go flying across his lavishly decored master bedroom.

He’s done some sick shit in his life, but this. This was your idea.

If only he could hear how you begged for it.

"Damn, baby, You are dead-ass enjoying this, aren't you?"

You don’t have to respond, but you do. "M-Mhm," you exhale in a needy moan as your throat engulfs the barrel of his gun.

There’s no way you can deny what is visibly present in both your eyes. 

The way your middle finger teases your soaked cunt. Your erected nipples leave two perfectly sculpted peaks that he can see through your sheer top.

He can't lie; he’s impressed and turned on by the sight. 

However, the reason you’re on your knees on his bedroom floor isn’t because he had a taste for a bored housewife. Your darling husband owes him a lot of money, and he will pay it if he wants his little trophy home by dinner.

Otherwise, Jungkook will gladly keep you—if you can behave.

With an ass like yours, Jungkook wouldn't let you out of his sight. Your place would be right on his lap, no matter the time or the place.

You have to keep a tight leash on this kind of pussy. The man’s an idiot. 

A woman as beautiful as you begging to be fucked? He’s not a nice guy, but how could he not show pity?

Jungkook can only stand there and imagine how your plump lips would look wrapped around his dick. The thought of it has him twitching inside his boxers.

As if you are reading his mind, your sticky digits abandon your wet panties and you place them on his designer-covered crotch. A sharp hiss pushes through his clenched teeth, biting back a slew of insults that could imply that he’s angry. Not in the slightest, he was just shaken by the sensitivity.

Staring into the desperation lingering deep in your irises, Jungkook knows what you’re asking for. Your mouth is filled to the brim, but you’re still begging for more.

Jungkook isn’t a gentleman, but he’s mindful of his strength when he grips your hair, snatching you away from his gun. He should have been cautious of your teeth, but you won’t need them anyway for what you’re about to do.

“Hey!” He watches your swollen lips part as you suddenly take in a large breath of air. Your lungs struggle to accommodate the pressure, leaving you coughing and choking for several seconds. The sound nearly drowns out his voice. “Look at me, dollface!”

Jungkook stares into your watery blown-out eyes, holding an intense gaze to make sure you understand him clearly. He realizes then that he has a problem on his hands.

Sexy and obedient. Fuck.

"Doll, you can get up if you want. I just want my money-"

"Fuck my throat."

Jungkook almost shudders when he hears your sweet voice. The lust hidden within that raspy tone is intoxicating.

"What?" he asks.

He heard you, though. Jungkook never misses a beat, but he’s just—stunned.

Clearing your throat, you repeat your request without an ounce of shame.

"My throat. Shove it down my throat, please."

Please.

You didn't have to add that last part. He was already preparing to take his dick out.

"Well, shit," he curses. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I am.”

Jungkook quickly places his gun on the dresser behind him and unbuckles his belt. He steals glances at you waiting patiently on your knees—like a good little slut. 

It’s goddamn shame how you have him fidgeting like a virgin.

Once his pants are loosened enough to slip a hand in and pull down his boxers, his cock springs out and introduces itself. Your reaction leaves a prideful smirk spreading across his face. Whatever you were expecting he knows that has been exceeded.

"Bit off more than you can chew, huh?"

You appear to be offended by his assumption. At least that’s what your expression reads. "Not at all," you reply, straightening your posture to align with his midsection. "May I?"

With Jungkook’s permission, you make contact with his length by grasping it gently in your smooth hand. Your fingers wrap around his girth as your eyes size him up.

Stroking him lazily in your warm palm, you admire his protruding veins that run along his length. You pause at the reddened tip, tapping the pool of precum that has developed at his slit. Your tongue licks your lips as if you’re sitting before a feast.

He understands it’s probably been forever since you’ve been in the presence of someone his size, but he’s impatient. You’ll have to do this another time.

"Don't fuck around, alright? I still got a bullet with your name on it, dollface."

You heed his warning and move closer, determining the best method of swallowing him whole.

"Sorry," you say in a whisper.

Those manners of yours will take you places; if you play your cards right.

"It’s no sweat, beautiful. Just keep going."

It's probably the first time he's said something as sincere; but honestly, he's just trying to get gobbled up before he cums all over his freshly waxed floors. His men are probably wondering what the hell is taking so long. For all they know, you’re using his bathroom to clean yourself up from the bumpy ride you had in the trunk of their car.

Without warning, Jungkook’s dick is sucked into your heavenly mouth. The warm and wetness invite him in without hesitation, comforting his throbbing length like a compress. He struggles to maintain his composure.

He isn't sure if he should allow you to take over because he cannot move. He couldn’t thrust if he wanted to. He’s mentally and physically stuck. The way you're slurping him up…he might not even be able to walk after this.

"Easy," Jungkook warns, which causes you to raise an eyebrow.

Finally, a bit of cockiness breaks through the surface.

Jungkook has no choice but to pull himself together and find his bearings because he’d die before boosting your ego.

"Fine," he grunts. "I can play rough too."

His hands snake their way to the back of your head, granting him full control. Your dark eyes never tear away from his face as he harshly uses his grip to push your head into his swift thrusts. You start to gag and choke, dropping saliva all over his cock and the floor. Something that would usually piss him off—but tonight, he can’t find an ounce of care.

It's not like he has to clean it up.

"Goddamn. Who's training this throat, hm?" He buries himself in your throat, making your forehead collide with his pelvic area. "Can’t be your hubby?"

When he hears a gurgled moan, he pulls away and allows you to speak. Through labored pants, you huff out your response. It’s one he's sure you've never shared with your husband.

"I'll suck that bastard dry every night before I let him cum inside me."

Jungkook nods. "Smart woman."

However, your business has nothing to do with him. Right now, he needs your undivided attention.

"Come here," he demands.

Jungkook hopes you were able to take in a breath before he lets go of his self-control.

You two had a deal, and he will uphold his part as you are yours. You’ve complied and given him some of the best head he’s ever received. Now, it’s time for the real show.

It’s been a month since he loaned your spouse some money; it’s time to pay up. To remind him of that, he’ll send your husband some face shots of his beautiful wife.

Jungkook will get his payment—one way, or another.

"Fuck!"

His body tenses now that he’s hitting the back of your throat. No matter how deep he goes, you never run out of space. The sweat rolling down his face is ignored because he’s too focused on how good your mouth feels around him.

Your warmth has him hunched over and leaning on his toes, his mouth stuck in an O-shape as he comes dangerously close to release. As he moves in and out of your crevice, he catches a glimpse of your juicy cunt being filled with your fingers, your body squirming and seeking the same relief he's chasing.

Both of your moans fill the room as you reach the peak of your highs. Your eyes roll back as your body becomes stiff. Jungkook knows exactly what's going on with you, and as you're riding out the waves of your orgasm, he waits for the perfect moment to pull out and paint you with his seed.

The time comes when you're no longer able to control your breathing, and you're desperately looking for a source of air. It's not a second too soon because Jungkook cannot bear another deep dive into your wet hole.

He slips out and gives his boner a couple of quick strokes before ropes of his cum paint your pretty face. The sounds you make indicate just how pleased you are with the results of your messy blowjob.

…And messy it is indeed.

It's everywhere, but he kept his promise and didn't get any in your hair.

"Ready?" Jungkook asks, still trying to catch his breath.

"Yeah."

Jungkook pulls his phone out of his back pocket and finds his camera. He positions it directly in front of your face. Your exhausted eyes and fucked out expression brings him some amusement. A contrast of how he felt before meeting you. 

"Is my hair okay?" you ask him, and this time he actually has to chuckle.

Since you've made his night a little better, he does a quick job smoothing down flyaways and kinks. 

Honestly, he didn't have to because you already look hot. Your hair all messy with his load dumped all over your face. All while adorned in an expensive diamond necklace your husband bought you—probably with his money.

Before he gets angry, he instructs you to look at the camera.

You pose provocatively as he takes a few pictures, giving your best doe-eyed pout.  When he’s done, he finally guides you to the bathroom. He allows you to use his shower or whatever else you’d need to clean up. 

Jungkook then lets you know that you may take as long as you need to freshen up while he sits on the bed to make this official.

He searches his contacts for the correct number. A mischievous grin slowly forms on his face as he taps the latest images in his camera roll, sending his debtor a little message to stir the pot.

03:14 am Sent: img.788, img.789....

03:14 am Sent: at the crib fucking your bitch. bring my bread and i might give her back.

He's lying. You’re staying right here.

Or…you can join your husband, in the cozy six-foot bed his men dug up for him in the woods.

[animeyanderelover]

To: Tsukinami Brothers (Poly) NSFW/THREESOME

Let's talk about a s/o who has Stolchom syndrome… what if Tsukinami brother's petite s/o wants to do threesome with them?

Thanks in advance! <3

Back to my studies, everyone!

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, abduction, isolation, mind break, Stockholm syndrome, Nsfw, breeding kink, specific mentions of darling's body type, afab s/o

Threesome

🔮​🐺​A threesome with those two won't be quite as easily achievable as you might think it is for the mere reason that those two quite often argue about how to treat you. Shin is a hopeless sadist who just wants to hurt you and see you suffer for no evident reason, Carla only hurts you to break your mind and shape you into his ideal version. Outside of that though, he won't harm you as long as you behave and since Stockholm syndrome has kicked in, he's become more lenient. By all means, the older of the Tsukinami brothers has no desire to share you with his brother, your request is perplexing and mildly he's even displeased because even if he's sharing with Shin, it's disappointing to find out that you seem to value his younger brother as much as you do him.

🔮​🐺​Shin finds your request initially just as strange because he absolutely doesn't want to share either, especially since Carla is in general the one who always forbids him to have his fun with you, he always has to hold back whether it's a simple torture or filthy and humiliating sex with you. Sure, you are a human but you aren't made of porcelain either. The younger brother knows the motives behind his brother's demands though, he wants your body to not sustain any permanent damage so that you can bear him an heir. What even is the appeal of a crying and helpless little brat anyways? Yet Shin is the one who kind of isn't as opposed to the idea as Carla is. Something about the aspect of possibly being able to get under Carla's skin is rather thrilling because as much as he respects his older brother, sometimes he just wants to spite him a bit.

🔮​🐺​Carla is the hardest one to crack because he's so strictly against the idea of sharing you physically like this. He has no desire to see Shin doing things in his own style which is distasteful and undesirable at best in his eyes. Carla knows that Shin is a freak but that doesn't mean that he wants to see for himself. So Shin ends up pestering him with the idea of it whilst you have to continue begging him, hoping that he might agree. If Carla tells both of you clearly that he has no interest though, it's wisest to stop because otherwise he sees it as an act of you disobeying him which naturally means that he has to teach you how to do better next time. You've been doing so well for him up until now, you wouldn't want to disappoint him. You shouldn't be such a hungry, little slut. He alone should be more than enough to satisfy your needs in the sheets.

🔮​🐺​A threesome with both of them, if Carla should agree to it with great skepticism, would be tiring and exhausting for their darling. Because even if Carla considers your petite form and warns Shin to hold back, especially now that he's present, ultimately both vampires are still sadists with an unlimited amount of stamina. Shin enjoys bickering with his older brother a bit simply to break his normally composed facade a bit by purposely getting on his nerves, earning him from Carla a sharp snarl all whilst the white-haired male is pounding into you. Shin is forbidden to cum into you to ensure that you'll be carrying Carla's child and even whilst the First Blood King will take you all for himself later anyways, he might as well start already now. Shin has no real problem with that. A crying and screeching baby is the last thing he wants and he has a defined love of soiling you in spit, sweat, your own blood and his sticky cum or simply watching you chock on his dick as he fucks your mouth.

[hislittleraincloud]

Fandom fic thoughts no one asked for:

I am highly, highly against Wednesday having any dialogue in which she speaks like her parents to her loved ones, i.e. all of that "Mon cher!" garbage towards Enid. It's cringey:

1. It's traditionally romantic and excessively cheesy, and [Ortega's] Wednesday is not. She just isn't, and y'all should know better. ETA: In regards to love, her parents are like Pepe Le Pew and a willing/enamored skunk (I forget if Pepe ever found his equal, but I do remember the girl cat got 🧠 'ed into behaving like Pepe usually does, which gave him a taste of his own psycho stalker medicine...ah, we had some fkd up cartoons back in the day). Wednesday would be like Michigan J. Frog...animated with only one person, in private...and that's still not a guarantee that she would ever want to emulate her mother, with whom we know that there are severe issues between them. Ridiculous, exaggerated displays of affection define Gomez and Morticia. To have Wednesday behave like that would be sacrificing the one thing that keeps her from turning into a total clone of them.

She can end up wanting to have love and a partner, and even a family, but that does not change the public mask [of a narcissist], and the notion that she would be perceived exactly like her mother upsets her. Direct reasons aren't given by the show, but by how they interact, we can see that Wednesday believes that 'everything is a competition'...but it's not [Morticia's] accomplishments that she rattles off that are the problem; it's somewhere, Wednesday picked up some terrible, terrible "I'm not good enough, I will never be as good as she is" blows to her psyche. From Wednesday's POV, she believes her mother is a narcissist (her self-awareness of her own narcissism is for its own post); only a narcissist would purposefully break someone else's chances of either being equal to or surpassing their greatness, and they get envious (and ego hurt) when it happens.

(...God, now I wanna program Ortega's voice to sing the fkn frog's song 🤣💀)

2. She doesn't want to be like her parents, and that would just...make her be more like her parents. This is the most major personal growth theme in the whole of the show, and it can't be ignored, otherwise it just turns Ortega's Wednesday into a generic iteration of a 'Wednesday character'. If it were one drabble or fic, alright, that's AU, but I see it in nine out of ten Wenclair 'drabbles' (if you can call straight-on dialogue shorts drabbles...we did not, back in the day) that clog up my fyp.

3. Her parents are extremely cultured and speak those love languages/romance languages as a whole together, to each other. Enid is not that kind of cultured at all (she can't spell, has bad grammar, and is just not interested in the same things Wednesday is). Enid would think it was cute, too, and Wednesday doesn't do cute, either (ever! EVER.**).

4. Again, Wednesday doesn't want to be like her parents, and it would be unfunnily mortifying to her to speak like that in public and in front of other people, even if she were fucking Enid. In private? See #1 and 2.

5. In Afterburn: It pained me to have her let slip the Spanish to Donovan on her birthday, but I did it because it was an unintentional slip, it was in private, and it wasn't a pet name, it was a command. She is very much like her mother in bed, but she also knows that Donovan isn't as cultured as her parents, and thus, she will refrain from that "mon cher/mon amour/whatever non-English pet names" crap.

6. There are so many other things Wednesday could call Enid (or Tyler, or Xavier, or whoever the Hell's she's paired with) without becoming a clone of her mother. Resorting to Gomez and Morticia's horribly cloying phrases is not charming, it's laziness. *channeling my inner Bianca here*

7. Now this goes back to #2 and #4, but on that note: There are obvious issues between Wednesday and her mother, and sounding like her disturbs the Hell out of her (or behaving like her, which is why Wednesday's eyes just about shit themselves in different directions when Fester said that her "death stare of disapproval reminded him of her mother").

It's almost like she has a glass eye.👀 It's there bc the AI picked it up hard I guess & it affected my outputs.

There is no way in Hell, no matter how juicy-tasty Enid's furry twat is, that Wednesday would suddenly decide that she should mimic Morticia.

I know all of this is gonna piss off a whole lot of people, but I don't care. It's not Wednesdaying right to have her call anyone by the same pet names her parents use, no matter how fluffy the relationship is. She just doesn't do relationships the same way her parents do. It's far more OOC to do that than even my pairing her up with Donovan is (which needs its own reasoning, probably in a different rant).

Rant over, and y'all can keep goin', but that's not gonna make the dialogue sound any less terrible and embarrassing.

**Afterburn Wednesday does do 'cute' with Donovan in private, but it's because of the fundamental differences from N/Canon attached to her core personality, i.e. she's hypersexual and has some regression issues here and there. Even still, she has a very hard time calling him any pet names because once again for those in the back: She does not want to be like her parents or associate her love with her parents' love, even as she recognizes that she is a lot like her mother. 🤷🏽‍♂️

(Also, I just read an incorrect assumption. Morgues have blood samples. They don't keep whole ass blood bags like blood banks/hospitals do. Get that right before you write me some Yoko & Wednesday.)

[shakingparadigm]

Recent mizisua adding up my overthinking ass

So mizi is representing a devil but look angelic while sua looks like a angel but loos demonic

For me, the devil made me think of the aliens' views of mizi. How she attacks Luka and escapes, leaves alien stage, and now works against aliens for humanity freedom.

And angel sua for me makes me thinks how sua is obedient towards her "parents" and do whatever they ask (because she has no hope, other than mizi on her side keeping her alive) but she has holding grudge against them

I also like to believe that mizi views her as an angel.

I feel like this is so (lowkey) incorrect. I yap so much, its kot even normal anymore 😿

that's so correct to me though??!! i mean, sua is an angel for obvious reasons (cough), but also it fits her due to the fact that she's completely complicit to the alien stage rules. she's the perfect example of what an Alien Stage contestant should be. she's behaved, well-mannered, a lovely singer, and died the way Alien Stage always intended despite mizi hoping otherwise. to the aliens, sua must be essentially perfect. she never did anything to break the rules, even going out of her way to avoid mizi's plan for a loophole. textbook definition of an angel, right down to her sweet and dainty looks.

mizi, although an absolute sweetheart, is a lot more carefree and less rule-abiding than sua. it makes sense for her to play the role of the "devil" considering all the things you mentioned. her expression in the art is quite sad though, maybe bashful? seems she's not used to the clothes, or maybe the role in general. i feel like she's still upset over sua, especially since angel sua has drops of blood on her. mizi definitely sees sua as an angel (she literally is), but maybe she sees herself as a devil (some sort of self-deprecating thing) because she blames herself for sua's death, believing herself to be evil for being complicit in it. that's just me shoehorning meaning into what is most likely just a cutesy themed drawing though hahaha. thanks for bringing it up!! I agree with all your points!!

[thatspiritualbabe]

How Societal Influence Makes it Difficult to Navigate a Twin Flame Journey

Raise your hand if you ever felt victimized by the following quotes:

"If he wanted to he would"

"If he truly loved you, you wouldn't have to question where your relationship stands"

"Actions speak louder than words"

If you've been on your twin flame journey for awhile, you probably already know the formula. There's always a runner and there's always a chaser in the relationship. If you're reading this, you're likely the chaser, otherwise known as the one more spiritually awakened than the runner. The runner is not nearly as awakened as you are, so they panic. As a result the runner may ghost, withhold a commitment from the chaser, get involved with a third party (or 3p for short).

I've been through all of the aforementioned examples in my twin flame journey. This really put me through the ringer emotionally. I'll be honest, some days it still does affect me. Twin flame relationships are meant to trigger you--bring insecurities or fears to the surface-- so that you work through it and grow as an individual and as a twin flame. It's not an easy thing to heal from, yet this healing stage is a piece of the puzzle that guides you to reunion with your twin flame.

I feel my healing hasn't been linear. I'm much better mentally than I was when these incidents happened, and I'm proud of how far I've come. I think societal influence has played a factor in why my healing has come in waves, and I'm sure other twins can relate. This goes back to the quotes I placed at the beginning of this article. There is much more awareness on social media nowadays about toxic relationships. On the surface, one can see the runner's actions and say "this relationship is toxic", "it's not logical to pursue", "the writing is on the wall", etc. When we have negative experiences, it's human nature to want to seek comfort from family, friends, maybe even a therapist. In my experience, seeking comfort can be both helpful and harmful. I say harmful, because the ones we seek comfort from usually tend to give unsolicited advice. And, if that person is not as spiritually enlightened as you are, you are likely to get a "logical" response in return. "You deserve better", "he's a douche", "there's other guys out there who wouldn't put you through this"--believe me, I've heard it all. I've always been a hopeless romantic and I truly want to believe in all the good that comes from a twin flame relationship. Once you and your twin conquer all of your triggers and heal and come into union, it's said to be the greatest love of all--you'll never have to relive any of that bullshit ever again.

So part of my healing includes trying to kill the noise. Take "logical" advice with a grain of salt; most logic is influenced by ego to begin with. Now, that being said, there are times you should reconsider if you want to persist with your twin flame. The ghosting, non-commitment, 3p-- we're human, we're flawed, we make mistakes. If the runner can grow from that, take accountability, and treat you like a queen/king going forward, I say explore the connection and see if you both can move past it. However, if mistreatment and disrespect is a constant you may decide you want to reconsider. We all have our limits for what we can tolerate. NEVER condone abuse. The Universe will often provide you signs for what path you should take. If you still have love for your twin and you decide it's worth persisting for the reunion, you need to try as much as possible to tune out logic. After reading others' experiences, it seems like a common theme that the runner usually behaves out of fear or insecurity. Maybe your runner felt you were TOO good for them and didn't think they deserved you. Maybe your runner ran to a 3p that they felt was more attainable/in their league because they have a low opinion of themself. Evaluate and see if it's possible one of these deeper underlying meanings could've been a reasonable explanation for their actions rather than what you can see in the 3D, or on the surface.

I hope this makes sense. I hope it provides you with insight and comfort that you are not alone. If you made it this far, please consider liking, following, and sharing. I'm still very new to this and I appreciate all of the support I've gotten so far. Even if I reach one person, I'm happy to be helping that one person and making a difference. <3

[hornsketch]

hey there! ive finally made an art blog! im going to try post more just… stuff, as usually i reserve my art posts for either special occaisions or specifically public-oriented works, and it kinda bums me out to not just have a place to dump my art anymore, so here you go!

(more details and helpful info below!)

who are you?

in hopes of providing some relevant lenses to view my work through, ill give some personal details here. if these lenses dont suit your interpretation of the work, thats alright! view as you please, though i do still think these will always be important context in said viewings.

my name is zelda (she/her) and im a queer jewish 20something who struggles quite a bit with illness both physical and mental.

ive always been kind of enthralled by impressionism and what it really means to use suggestion and spirit as a stronger tool than portrayal and form.

i have a particular draw to fantasy and magical aesthetics, especially the world-building within.

i am a serial overthinker, and tend to see alot of meaning and symbolism in things that plainly do not have them.

while yes i am jewish, my relation to faith is complicated. if you see me type “god” im using it in a turn of phrase with no meaning. if you see me type out “g-d” i am being religious. yes i know thats not how its supposed to work. its meaningful to me.

what will you post?

as previously mentioned, here im trying to make a concerted effort to post a broader variety of things with a wide selection in quality and topic, so unfortunately here the only real uniting theme is going to have to be that i made it. still! to help navigate the space, listed below will be a list of tags i will try to keep to, all of which this post will also be tagged as, since i know tumblr search can be finicky.

#the self and the other

these will be about me, my friends and loved ones, or possibly both

#differing mediums

these pertain to other works or universes, as well as fan content

#harsh tones

this is gonna be the rough stuff. topics will be tagged as needed.

#jaunty doodles

funny business. shenanigans, even.

#lesssfw

listen this blog is for a wide breadth of content, so please if you do not want to, or otherwise should not be seeing mild to moderate nsfw content (i dont rlly plan on posting straight up porn here) block this tag.

wait— is there anywhere you do post more direct nsfw?

maybe, yeah. but before any of that i would like to set some ground rules. these are my spaces for me to share my work for others to see. if you arent a fan of what i post, ill make no attempts to dissuade you from that. your discomfort is your right. I would however request that you dont make your discomfort an issue i am epxected to remedy. ill have no harsh feelings if you arent a fan of my less safe for work content, or even anything it may tangentially relate to, and need to take the necessary steps to curate your experience in those regards. i will be far less than happy if people cant behave because i post content that is not to their personal tastes, within reason.

all of that being said, yes, if you are an adult fan of my other work, feel free to check out @shinyspadetiptail

do you take commissions?

yeah, usually. im not really at the point where i have to close and open them for availability reasons, so shoot me a dm and ill usually be able to give you a response pretty quick on.

price tends to vary by project, and i always set $20 per hour of canvas time as my baseline, but generally simpler stuff like limited detail icons and emojis run in the $20-$30 range, while fully detailed halfbodies tend to run in the $40-$50 range, and fully done fullbodies range more $70-$80. aside from that, backgrounds are a little too context dependent to put a full price estimate on and extra characters can and will cost extra.

usually whatll happen is after laying out the basic price range we’ll talk, and ill thumbnail until we have smth we can agree on, and once weve got an idea of what were going for ill give an estimate that ill try to stick close to, barring any major changes or complications. from then on ill try to send updates whenever i work, and then when im relatively close to finished ill ask for the payment either through paypal or cashapp, after which ill send on the finished piece and any expected variations. in some cases, this may be changed, and payment may be done half at the start, and half when relatively close to completion.

[cheapshrimpysheep]

500 Followers Celebration - Requests

edited:

These Requests are now CLOSED

See the requests list here.

original:

I don't have a date to close it, but I will do it when I think I already have a good amount of requests.

(This post may change in the future)

In celebration of my 500 Followers, I thought I might open requests for TWISTED WONDERLAND and OBEY ME! for a limited time. 🥳 (Even though I already passed 500 followers a long time ago) I've never done this before so I tried to research as much as I could to make a good list of rules.

🤔 If you want to know why I don't usually have requests: I'm relatively new to writing for tumblr and wanted to write my ideas. As a person committed to finishing what I start, I knew that if I had requests I could put a lot of weight on my own shoulders. So I will only do this on special occasions.

Despite talking about "requests", I feel that I should make it clear that I won't write for all of them. I’m planing to select the ones that I think I can write something good with the idea. So, see this more as "suggestions". Which doesn't mean that the other ideas are bad. The idea might be good but I don't know how to do it. 😅 😔

✅ I only write Reader-inserts.

✅ Up to 7 Characters per request (depending on how short or long the request can be)

✅ I intend to write like I usually do, like "What if...". So Imagines and Headcannons by Bullet Points. Around 300 words maximum per character if there's too many. (let’s start short 😅)

✅ I always write Gender Neutral Reader. If you want a specific gender, I just feel comfortable writing Fem Reader, since I myself am one. BUT if I see that I can make it into a gender-neutral reader, I will.

I WILL NOT WRITE:

🔞NSFW / smut

🚫Yandere

🚫Dark Themes / Themes that require some kind of trigger warning. (Examples:  rape, suicide, eating disorders, panic attacks, abuse, etc.)

🚫Angst UNLESS it ends with fluff/comfort (exemple: my “You... Cheater?” post)

I like to read these kinds of things for comfort, so I also write to comfort the reader. So something that strays too far from that, I won't write.

😈 OBEY ME:

Characters that are part of the Intimacy System only. In Luke's case, uniquely platonic. I still don't know enough about Mephistopheles, Thirteen or Raphael to be able to write anything with them.

Please tell me which timeline you would like: Original or Nightbringer. Otherwise, I'll pick the one that I think will make the most sense.

I always follow Canon. But if you want some kind of AU, please let it be something I can adapt to some Levi’s cursed game or something like that.

🪞 TWISTED WONDERLAND:

I follow the English Server. So please don't ask me for anything about history and/or events that have only happened on the Japanese Server yet. Sorry. 😔

Students only. In Ortho’s case, uniquely platonic.

I always follow Canon. No AUs. Unless it's small things like the reader is already in a relationship with them, I don’t know. The further away from the canon the less I'll know how the heck they would behave. 😅

You can make your requests by asking me.

Even if you don't ask for any request, I wanted to say that I'm really glad that you enjoy my writing. And I am very grateful to everyone who likes, comments and/or reblogs my writing. Thank you so much! 🥰

If you landed on this post out of nowhere and want to know read some of the things I've already written, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

[sucordera]

RULES.   ❧

☙  memes

do not reblog a meme from me unless you send it in. reblog the meme from the source. breaking this rule, since it’s literally the first, will result in an immediate hard block.

☙  tags / triggers

this blog will contain highly triggering elements and extreme caution is advised when viewing or partaking in this blog's writing. themes may not always be tagged, but be aware that on this blog, there will be: bodily horror + mutilation, bondage, religious horror + trauma + blasphemy, cult + cult mindset behavior, and other such extensive unsafe for work themes. i will tag what will seem immediately necessary.

please tag these following things as either “”,    “tw _“,    or   “jaqi don’t look” as applicable to what they are   ( usually just nsfw / suggestive works, too ).     **i.e.,   #underwear,  #lingerie,  #tw lingerie,  #nude,  #tw nude,  #nsfw,  #nsft,  #suggestive,  #jaqi don’t look    photos / visuals of women’s underwear / lingerie  nude / semi nude visuals  gifs / photos of explicit intimacy blogs that do not tag these accordingly by any means   WITHOUT   using special / characterized tags i will unfortunately have to hard block.  remind me, if you want, if i need to tag certain content. just as i won’t always send reminders, you are not obligated to either. we have to keep ourselves safe first and that's okay.

☙  suggestive content

i do not write smut / lemon content on tumblr, but suggestive and un/sfw themes will be semi-heavily prevalent on this blog. i avoid following / interacting with blogs that write & post excessive nsfw / suggestive content, especially when it’s not tagged.

☙  shipping

this blog will be single-ship and not be exploring the idea, nor suggestion of any other romantic pursuits. eloisa is canonically dedicated to @lasplaga's osmund saddler, alone. i will practice mains, affiliates, and exclusives. anyone that i set as my exclusive, i will not interact with duplicates of  ( fc / muse alike, unless of course my main / exclusive is a duplicate of themselves ). people i am affiliated or mains with will get higher priority. mains / affiliated with: ✧ ｡° exclusive to:    ✧ ｡°   @lasplaga's osmund saddler

☙  activity / responses

this blog is low activity / low maintenance, meaning i will simply get to what i get to as i want to. i have adhd, i’m autistic, and i have several disorders / disabilities as well as a multitude of other blogs. i won’t always be here and i apologize for that. please be patient with me.

☙  passwords

i do not send in rule passwords / like rule posts / do any “confirmations if read” stipulations. i will always re/read rules before: creating a starter, answering a starter, sending an ask / meme, IM’ing with questions / concerns - if i can find your rules to begin with. otherwise i normally IM to ask about rules if i can’t find them.

☙  selectivity

i am HIGHLY SELECTIVE, and will be mutual exclusive. interactions will remain almost exclusively within the resident evil fandom or applicable horror mediums. i will severely limit who i follow, as well as my followers. i will not interact with:    13 rea.sons why,   haz.bin hotel / hell.uva boss,   blogs with formats / aesthetics that are difficult to see / read. i selectively interact with d.ead b.y d.ayl.ight blogs.

☙  misc.

rules may be adjusted as i see fit  ( last update:  June 25th, 2024 ).  general rp etiquette is expected. all icons and graphics are either capped and edited by me or given by @lasplaga and are not for sharing. do not steal or alter for your own claim. i will literally cry. no god modding, no killing w/out discussion, no drama, etc.. we should know how to behave on a public platform by now.

☙  mun

hi! i’m jaqi; viet-mexican, 27, and an aries! my special interests are: pacific rim, blood+, labyrinth, narnia, and snow white! i love love love making new friends so come and chat sometime!

** i try to update these rules when needed. a psa will be posted when any major changes are made.

[inherstars]

Totally agree - the whole Ellie I hate you Joel theme is just belaboured. I know kids have reason to hate parents/parental figures and I know sometimes they don't, like it's just they're in the wrong and don't want to admit it. Show version was Ellie had no agency. Nobody told her she was gonna die. Also she is only 14. I know she has consent over her body and choices but in the context of Joel... He has lost a daughter. He is not going that again. It's like history repeating itself but he has the option to change the ending and he does. He loves Ellie and that's what any dad would do in that situation like fuck the world who cares. I don't think it's right to kill a 14 year old girl in the hope of a cure which might not even work anyways. Ellie is a unique combination of everything that makes her resistant. Whose to say it can be replicated without tests and trials. Just even when Ellie is an adult when she should have matured by then to see what was going through Joel's head at that moment in time and understood even if she didn't agree. I find it hard to believe she would keep holding it against him.

Yeah, it's A LOT to unpack, both for and against. I've gone on before about the absolute unlikelihood of such a procedure even working, not to mention the "kill the golden goose" approach that they were ready to take IMMEDIATELY, without any additional testing? Like... what if the cordyceps infection in her brain was triggering something in her lymphatic system to produce an anti-toxin. Now what the fuck are you gonna do, guys? It's just dumb. It's hard for me to completely blame Ellie, because -- like I said -- it feels like sloppy, lazy writing. "Here's the end we want, so here's how we're going to manipulate these characters into behaving, to get to that end." They traveled across the country together. She watched this dude literally murder people with his bare hands and nearly kill himself in the process to save her.

You're surprised he's willing to let the world burn to save you? Was there any single parent -- biological or otherwise -- in all of Jackson who would have been like, "Oh, I for sure would have let them just straight up murder my child. No question."

It's like reading a fanfic where the writer has taken way too many liberties with the characters in order to tell the story they want.

"Future Days" was definitely my attempt to rein the whole thing in and make it make sense.

As another creator, it's just very frustrating to try and justify it. I like who she WAS, I don't like who they MADE HER in order to fit the narrative they wanted to tell.

[mayor-bubblegum]

Rules (For mobile users)

MUN INFO AND REMINDERS:

Mun is 30 and female. Muses are 18 years of age, or older, unless otherwise stated. Take note that I reserve the right to accept or deny any interaction at any time, and for any reason, based on the rules stated below and/or factors otherwise not stated here for my own comfort, wellbeing and safety. I also reserve the right to add or remove anyone from my role playing space on the same grounds, as well as the right to refuse giving any reason should you be hard-blocked. If I don’t want to have you anywhere near my text role playing environment, respect that decision and move on.

I am a semi-selective role player! I’m the most comfortable role playing with close friends and other mutual partners, but don’t be afraid to ask for info, requesting for thread/plotting and/or just chatting in general if you are not yet a mutual or do not plan to be one.

While this blog is mostly targeted towards a general audience of at least 13 years of age, bear in mind that it will touch on certain sensitive and dark themes and/or topics, and they will be tagged accordingly. You may blacklist tags for these themes, or turn back if you would rather not see it.

CONTENT WARNINGS:

This blog contains sensitive and dark themes (e.g: war, death, loss of loved ones, foul language, violence).

Sexually explicit content is not tolerated on this blog due to the nature of the source material, and despite the mun being of age. Do not solicit me for this kind of content.

Remember: Character’s views =/= author’s views. Keep this in mind whenever muses I play as are doing things that are unacceptable in the norms of society.

ROLE PLAYING:

I prefer paragraphed text role play, and users who can keep up with it. However, I am open to other writing styles if needed be.

No meta-gaming and god-modding. Try to be fair when role playing.

Do not force fictional relationship establishment! I am not very good with establishing and maintaining romantic ships between my muses and muses of others and chances that I will be SUPER picky is high, but other relationship types are otherwise free game (familial, friendship, rivalry, enemies)!

Ask box availability to anonymity is at my discretion. If this feature gets abused to the point I feel uncomfortable allowing it to stay on, then it will be turned off indefinitely.

Do not spam the inbox of this blog! I am more than welcome to more than a question from one blog at a time, but getting more than five messages in a consecutive and short time period from the same blog can get irritating.

I prefer having prompts and memes I post/reblog linked to or mentioned when I am sent one from a list. This makes answering given prompts easier! You don’t have to, but that means I will have to look for memes/prompts I posted/reblogged.

Crossovers are more than welcome, but for personal preferences and reasons, I refuse to interact with canon characters and OCs from the following: Axis Powers Hetalia, Countryballs fandom, Homestuck, Poppy Playtime, Yandere Simulator

OOC:

Be respectful. Treat folks as you would like to be treated the same, if not similarly. Being rude is not cool.

Be patient with my reply rate. I may be sporadic in activity, and I won’t necessarily reply to a thread right away.

Any disputes with me should be handled privately. If you have a problem with how I behave, tell me and I’ll make amends the best I can. I am a human like you, after all.

Do not drag me in any interpersonal conflict for no good reason. I’m aware that drama and related problems with social life online can happen anywhere at any time, but I’m here to write with others and have fun, not have petty arguments with people on a keyboard nor phone screen. In addition, public callouts or any other form of accusatory message regarding another mun sent to me, anon or otherwise, will be ignored unless you are willing to discuss it with me privately. However, I reserve the right to doubt your claims until you can adequately prove to me that the mun in question is an immediate danger to anyone they interact with.

Personal blogs are still allowed to follow and ask questions, but I will have you blocked/soft-blocked if you reblog ANY in-character interactions.

Breaking any of these rules land you a warning, and further violation will result in a hard block. Posting harmful content (e.g: Child abuse, animal abuse) in any way that shines them in positive light is subject to being blocked immediately and reported to authorities where applicable. If you, at any point of time, for any reason disagree with the rules stated above, then it is advised that you avoid this blog altogether. Blocking exists, and so is the Back button. Use either or both. If you have read the rules, send the phrase “We got to learn to live together.” to my inbox! While it is not required, it is otherwise appreciated. Thank you for reading.

[c7thetumbler]

Quick Game Reviews 2020

Hey, I had this saved in my drafts and even though it’s only a fraction complete I figured I should publish it anyway cuz why not. There’s only 8 reviews here and they’re a weird selection so it’s not relevant, but ye.

Runner3 (Steam)

The third game in the Bit.Trip Runner Series, the first of which was the 4th game in the Bit.Trip Complete pack. I’m a big fan of these games; the first and second ones were really tight and fun, a very difficult yet fair romp through several wacky worlds and each had their own unique look. I was excited to try this one out for sure, though I admit I took my sweet time getting here (It’s $20, so I wasn’t in that much a rush)

I hate to say that I’m a bit disappointed. It builds off the crazy, gross but in a good way, wacky the-narrator-is-actually-just-the-voice-actor-Charles-Martinet-as-himself vibe that Runner 2 made and I love that so that’s good. Where it fails however is in its gameplay. It’s fine; by no means terrible, but the “normal” levels have you replaying the same level multiple times to accomplish different goals after passing alternate routes the first time around, some of which lead to some pretty weird and wacky geometry you’re not clear how to handle, which is a bad thing for this. I kinda which they had elected to the alt paths being equally optional instead of adding a second “gem run” to it that’s essentially a whole new level. And really should’ve been.

The double jump opens up new possibilities but makes the game feel a lot more loose since you can do it at any time and that’s a whole new angle to run into obstacles with. The vehicle sections similarly rely more on placement than on timing your actions (the core gameplay of the series, since you time the result of your actions to the beat otherwise).

The worst offender is the unlockables and the Retro mode. See all those wacky characters up there? I couldn’t figure out how to unlock any of them while I was running through. It was bizarre beating the final boss just over 3 hours in, and then going back to the title screen to still not have unlocked anything. The retro mode returns from Runner 2 as well, though in Runner 2 it was supposed to look like an NES game, in 3 it looks like an old cartoon mixed with Newgrounds Flash animator’s first game. And plays like it too; it’s clunky, it isn’t even timing or music based, enemies behave very strangely and even unfairly at times, and it just felt like I had been conned into it; There appear to be just as many normal levels as Retro levels as well, so after playing a few I just stopped and zoomed through the rest of the game. Honestly, the Bit.Trip series has a lot to offer and I’d recommend giving each title a try, but for this one? Runner2′s a more solid experience, and you can definitely skip 3.

Gris (Steam)

This game is gorgeous and lovely and charming, play it.

It’s a fairly simple Indie 2D platformer, but where it stands out is it’s artstyle and how it winds that into the gameplay and narrative. It’s not a hard game, nothing really can kill you and none of the puzzles or platforming is difficult, but that’s fine. That’s not the point; Think of it like Journey, but with a different theme which necessitates the lack of other players. It’s beautiful and sounds great, and is definitely worth the praise it got.

Honestly I went back and looked at some of the reviews to see what everyone thought about it specifically, and was pretty surprised about some of the criticism it got. People saying it was too easy, or that the game shouldn’t deal with the themes it does; varying wildly from “why are there no enemies” to “why can’t this just be a pretty game I just run through” and everything far between. And I could try and say games don’t have to be inherently fun or challenging in order to be enjoyable, but I don’t even need to go that far. This game is fun, a nice 3-hour run through some unique and amazing scenery with a bunch of random secrets to collect if you’re so inclined. But this game was made with a specific theme and narrative in mind, and complaining that it’s overdone for an indie-platformer to focus on that in the same breath as saying it should’ve done something more challenging with it’s gameplay very much misses the entire point of the game, and I’d argue even playing it.

Soviet Jump Game (Steam)

So I played this only a couple times; once when it first came out (very buggy, virtually unplayable), and then again a month or so later. It’s in Early Access at this moment and they’re constantly adding features and improving it. It’s also free. Honestly, it’s definitely not a bad game; there’s quick fun to be had here and there’s enough variety in power-ups for re-playability, but it’s also a Battle Royale and I am not a huge fan of those so. Worth a pick-up just to see if you like it though

Sonic Adventure 2: Battle, Modded (Steam)

So I had the urge to replay this game and see if I could go for the 100%, but knowing that the Sonic community is really big on fan games and mods I decided to go on and try them out to see if I could get rid of its famously bad jankiness. I got them all of Gamebanana, and they built their own mod manager so I used:

Character Select Plus: https://gamebanana.com/guis/35023 (Allows you to select any character, including MP only ones

Chao World Extended: https://gamebanana.com/gamefiles/6336 (adds back a lot of missing/new features to make Chao raising less tedious and more varied)

Amy With Shorts: https://gamebanana.com/skins/169559 (she’s 12, SEGA wtf)

A variety of other Chao and visual improvements, including HD gui, textures, no model tinting, etc.

A couple level specific fixes, like Crazy Gadget but fun and a fix for random crashes

And a few cheat codes built in that let characters use other characters’ power-ups

I then proceeded to painstakingly 100% the game. What did I learn? Unless the mods mean to completely redefine the game, they’re not going to make it a whole new experience. It’s still Sonic Adventure 2, and that means the game  is 80% jank. It’s also not worth your time to 100%, since it’s a whole lot of insane, glitchy jumps and looking for invisible springs and all kinds of nonsense. If you’ve not played SA2 since it first came out and remember liking it, it’s worth looking through the Mods on GameBanana if you want to relive the experience slightly improved, but really this game’s age shows through either way.

Ty the Tasmanian Tiger (Steam)

So I bought the whole quadrilogy not realizing they’re making an HD remaster of this one.

Whoops.

Anyway, I was on a 3D platformer kick I guess and decided to indulge myself of these games. This first one is definitely like “Oh this is early GC platforming.” It’s not bad, but it’s a lot of random things scattered around the level kinda nonchalantly and then telling you to go find it. It’s kinda buggy, but they put a lot of effort into the characters and theme, so there’s points to it there at least. It’s not particularly noteworthy for what it is, but it’s a fun 3D platformer to kill a few hours with. If you haven’t played other, more notable 3D platformers though, go ahead and give this a pass; I’d honestly recommend New Super Lucky’s Tale first.

Ty the Tasmanian Tiger 2 (Steam)

You know that 2000′s era thing where a bunch of game companies turned their mascots and franchises into edgier, “cooler” versions of themselves and added guns and cars and made it GTA like in aspects? You know, Shadow the Hedgehog, Bomberman, Jak II, Ratchet & Clank’s focus on combat, etc.?

This did that. Hard. I could only play through the first level where I went from idly throwing boomerangs in a warzone to piloting a mech that was manning a turret to destroy giant mechs, and like, I have no idea how to recommend this one because that age of edge was a pass for me.

Chibi-Robo: Clean Sweep (Emulated DS, Fan Translation)

I have a big beef with the Chibi-Robo series that people who have read previous review from me would get. Mainly the first GameCube one was amazing, and then they’ve been degrading in quality ever since. Queue this game, the actual one to one sequel both gameplay and plot wise to the GC one that never got localized because ???

It’s really good, not as good as the GC one, but does an excellent job of scratching that itch. The toys are interesting, the story’s funny but has some genuine compassionate moments, and it plays pretty well. All in all, for a portable vision of the GC this knocks it out of the park so I still don’t get why they went pure gimmicks from here on out.

Mousecraft (Steam)

One of my beefs with a lot of the steam games that I own is that they’re just ported phone games. That really shouldn’t be a beef, but when I start up a game I’m a tiny bit interested in and I see a level system with 3 Stars ad ideal solutions to collect the bonuses and all the typical phone stuff I’m just like “I can do without this tbh”

That being said, I played a bit of this one, and it’s fine. Kinda like Lemmings or the Mario Vs. DK series, you guide the mice to the cheese while making them run into things, but you only have tetris blocks and various powerups to do it with so you can’t do it directly. It’s a fun puzzle game that’s fine in micro-doses, but I’m not terribly into that on my PC so I only played half the first world. There seems to be a lot of content in it though.

Other games that I played in 2020 but never got around to reviewing:

Hyrule Warriors: Definitive Edition Animal Crossing: New Horizons Chex Quest HD Divinity: Original Sin 2 Helltaker Hakoniwa Explorer Plus Picross Touch Shantae and the Seven Sirens nullpointer Eat Girl ART SQOOL Pokemon Shield: Isle of Armor Anodyne Beglitched Bleed Fall Guys BRKÖUT Curse of the Crescent Isle DX Data Loss Democratic Socialism Simulator JUMP GRID Lenna’s Inception LOOK at the PALACE OF WOE Micro Mages Mobius Oh Jeez, Oh no, My Rabbits Are Gone PikuNiku Puzzle Puppers Speer Switch ‘N’ Shoot Task Force Krampus DATA LOSS TEN_S Your Future Self WATERSFINE Witch Thief Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn -> Shadowbringers Muse Dash Super Mario 3D All-Stars Among Us Hades

[dejwritesarchived]

SPOTTED — msby black jackals volleyball star atsumu miya following pop princess (y/n) around like a poor innocent puppy. seems like the twin’s tail is stuck in between his legs now that princess (y/n) sank her teeth into him. #hisfriends&hisdadhateher

— atsumu miya x reader ( corruption kink, nepotism child!reader, singer!reader, dom!reader, sub!atsumu, handjob, mean!reader, manipulation, sexist jokes, reader calls atsumu 'tsumu', mentions of pubes, gaslighting, spit kink, bathroom sex )

theme song(s): crybaby, megan thee stallion ft da baby + dark red, steve lacy

XOXO, GOSSIP GIRL MASTERLIST.

YOU STOOD WITH SUNGLASSES ON AS YOU WERE WAITING FOR ATSUMU TO PICK YOU UP FROM THE AIRPORT. You felt annoyed at the fact that you were stuck at the airport for over forty-five minutes, hoping no one recognized you as you sipped on coffee and went through your social media pages and other websites. Particularly Gossip Girl, you couldn’t help but roll your eyes and remember the post they wrote about you. How could they say those things about you? And people were agreeing with it. Perhaps your post wasn’t as bad as that supermodel Hakkai’s post. They called him a manwhore that can’t walk straight. 

You don't understand people sometimes. Why was it that it was okay to write those things about people like them? But when you said something back, you were the bad guy? You were the one labeled as a bitch or hard to work with. It made you laugh. Being one of the most popular pop singers in the world became more stressful considering the bizarre comparison with stars like Dua Lipa and Ariana Grande. And guess who was seen as the tyrant between you three? You. 

Your phone started to ring and you saw your manager calling you, you answered it with a quickness. “I still can’t believe you decided to go to freakin’ Japan. Even though his friends hate you,” Your manager said.

“Do they hate me? If they did, they would have made him dump me,” You responded bluntly. 

“You have that much of a charm on the guy,” Your manager said.

“I wouldn’t say that, he has a charm on me also,” You said. You found yourself smiling a bit even thinking about your boyfriend. 

“Just don’t let your temper get the best of you. They don’t know the real you,” Your manager explained.

You let out a sigh, “Okay, I won’t. I mean, it’s just dinner with his friends.” 

“And dinner with your famous volleyball player's friends can be intense, especially considering his family already don’t like you.” Your manager soon adds.

“Okay in my defense, I think they’re just upset he’s been spending more time with me than them. I can’t control that,” You bluntly admitted. 

You heard your manager let out a chuckle, “Everything isn’t about you hun,” They admitted.

“Gossip Girl says otherwise. That website is spreading lies about me and because small-minded people rather read gossip, of course, they’re going to believe that page over me. Do you know how embarrassing it is having Jimmy Kimmel make a joke about who I slept with? That’s why I’m the bitch I am today. Perhaps women should be angry some more, maybe just maybe misogyny would be banished if we were a little angrier,” You ranted.

You could hear your manager let out a sigh. “Just enjoy dinner with Atsumu’s friends and please behave. I’m running out of ‘Y/N is deeply sorry’ basket ideas to give out and the label is tired of giving out hush money,” Your manager warned.

You glanced up seeing Atsumu walk toward you and you couldn’t help but let your lips curl into a smirk. “Tsumu’ here, I’ll behave.” You quickly said before hanging up.

Those were the last words you told your manager before hours later you found yourself clutching at the bathroom sink trying to consume your anger. You inhaled sharply and exhaled. You even did the counting trick your infamous actress of a mother taught you to do when your emotions were getting the best of you. You didn’t expect to meet Atsumu’s friends today, but here you were in his brother’s restaurant hiding away after a comment was made about your embarrassing interview a couple of weeks ago. 

You chewed at your tongue to spit out harsh words, but instead, you pushed yourself from the table to excuse yourself to the ladies' room. “Everything is going to be okay, just take a deep breath. You do—”

Your words were cut off by your boyfriend’s voice, “You don’t have to snap at everyone. That’s the reason you’re labeled as a bitch in the first place.” He finished. 

You looked at him as he slowly crept his way into the room being sure to make sure no one saw him. You rolled your eyes at him before going back to washing your hands for what seemed like the third time. 

“You’re okay?” Atsumu asked.

“Of course, I’m not.” 

“It was just a little joke Y/N.”

“But jokes are supposed to be funny. It wasn’t funny. I already have the world constantly trying to berate me, I don’t need your friends doing it also,” You sneered. “They don’t like me.” 

Atsumu was quiet for a second, his lips parted to speak but you interrupted him quickly. 

“And you didn’t even bother to defend me. So much of a boyfriend you are?” You snapped. 

“Maybe if you weren’t so fuckin’ stubborn and acting like a diva then they’ll like you! It was a harmless joke, which he apologized for right after. You’re just on edge because of that Gossip Girl post.” Atsumu argued. “The way you’re acting right now, clearly shows people what the blog is saying is true.” 

His words cut you like a harsh knife as you looked at him. You were so shocked at his words, that you didn’t know what to say. You could feel how intense the moment was between the two of you after the harsh words that were spread between the two of you. You never expected Atsumu to raise his voice at you, he had never done that before. You could even tell it took him by shock. Like clockwork, instead of acknowledging Atsumu’s words, you ignored them. You’ve noticed you did that a lot, completely ignored his side of an argument. Afraid to admit that you were wrong. 

Your lips pouted out as you looked at him, “Tsumu, I’m ready to go home. Can we go?” You innocently asked. You leaned up to place subtle kisses against his chiseled jawline. 

“But babe—“ His words were cut off when he felt the palm of your hand rub against his crotch. 

“Please.” Your voice oozed with manipulation, your lips placed a peck on Atsumu’s lips.

“I just think we need to cool down from the situation,” You said lowly as you stepped closer to him. 

“And we need to go home to do that?” He questioned. “You just don’t want to be around my friends.” 

“Why would I want to be?” You asked out loud. “I have nothing in common with them.” 

“They’re a part of me. I’m not saying you have to act just like them or like the same things they like. I would just appreciate it if you guys got along,” Atsumu explained calmly. 

You thought about it for a second as you met his gaze. He was giving you that same puppy dog look he gave you when he wanted something. His thick eyebrows knitted together and his lips formed the same pout that was plastered on your face. 

“Fine but first,” Your head motioned to the stall. Now it was time for you to pout again. 

“Seriously? You want to do it here, in my brother’s restaurant bathroom?” Atsumu said. 

Your teeth nibbled on your lower lip as you were backing into one of the stalls slowly. Your index finger motion for the volleyball player to follow you. “At least let me make you feel good.” You suggested. 

Atsumu’s ears perked up like a dog hearing its favorite chew toy being squeezed. His feet glided against the bathroom floor as he followed you into the stall. Your lips instantly crashed into his once the stall door was closed and locked. It was insane how much you had a charm on the guy. Although, from the bottom of your heart you knew it was wrong. There were times when you said some things and did some things to get Atsumu practically eating out your palm. Only cause you were afraid that he won’t look at you the same. That he’ll look at you the same way the people who wrote horrible things about you looked at you. 

Your hand instantly went to undo his pants. Pushing them down slightly to release Atsumu out of his boxes. You were so eager to stroke his cock, wanting to feel the feeling of Atsumu’s dick growing hard in the palm of your hand. Not wasting any time as your fingertips stroked at his pink shaded mushroom-shaped tip. Atsumu lets out a relaxed sigh as he let his body slump against the bathroom stall. You would free your hand from his cock holding it up to his mouth. “Spit.” You simply said.

“What?” The volleyball player asked confusedly. 

“Just do what I say,” You urged. “Spit.”

You heard your boyfriend sigh before he’s spitting in the palm of your hand that previously was clutching his thick member. The wet substance pooling in the palm of your hand before you guide it to his dick. Atsumu’s dick was pretty. You loved giggling about it in your friends' group chat when you were off about six mimosas after brunch. Even on days where he didn’t trim, his dick still sat pretty when he was rock hard. The feeling of his cock hardening in the palm of your hand was amazing. If you weren’t a cocky superstar, you would even admit that it was a better feeling than holding your fourth Grammy. Although, he was more of a grower than a shower. When he was growing, he would grow. It was thick enough to have your lips gasp apart when he bottomed down inside you. His tip was a nice mushroom shape that looked pleasant when it glistened with precum. And he even jokingly would tell you that he and his twin brother Osamu have an identical vein on their cocks that seem to only appear when they’re hard. 

The pornographic sound of you stroking Atsumu’s cock bounced off the walls in the bathroom. You loved teasing your boyfriend a bit, deciding to flick your wrist in a slow-motion that caused his voice to get whiny just the way you like it. Occasionally when you gave him Lil teasing handjobs, he’ll even place those large hands over yours to help you guide his cock at a pace he wanted. When he did that, your panties instantly grew soaked at the action. But right now, you wanted to take it at the pace you wanted. 

“Y/N,” Atsumu whined as his hips bucked upward into your palm. 

Hearing your name from his mouth made your heart beat faster before you flickered your wrist up and down his cock at the pace he liked. You watched as his face grew as red as the Chanel purse you carried today. He was a whining mess right in front of you and you were loving every moment of it. 

Despite the gossip articles about how you didn’t care for Atsumu. That you were only dating him for popularity. No one knew that you could read the volleyball player like a book. You knew him, you knew his mind, and of course, you knew his body. You knew that the lower part of his abdomen always quivered when he was about to cum. His hips always buck recklessly just so he can shoot thick strings of cum either inside you or on you. The heat of the moment in the small bathroom stall was so intense, that you could see Atsumu’s eyes water with tears of pleasure as he let out a breathy moan. His head fell back to be met with the stall walls. “Y/N, fuck—“ his words were interrupted by the sound of the women’s bathroom door being pushed open.

Your free hand instantly clasped over Atsumu’s mouth, shushing the moans that he wanted to spit out. The two of you could hear two women chattering in the bathroom, most likely touching up their makeup. Your wrist flickered up and down in a slow-motion that caused Atsumu’s chest to cave inward. He was trying to control his breathing so he wouldn’t cum just yet.

“Go ahead and cum, I don’t care.” You whispered as you were pooling up all the saliva in your mouth. “You’re so close to cumming baby and I would hate to leave you like this.” 

You would give your boyfriend a flirtatious wink as you would then let your spit out your mouth to drop on Atsumu’s cock. The wetness hitting his cock and your hand to add more lubrication to it. You continued to work Atsumu’s cock, hand gliding up and down in a quick motion as he squirmed in your touch. 

“Did you see Y/N at that table? I can’t believe that guy is with her. The tabloids say she’s a horrible person.” You heard one of the women say.

Your ears grew hot hearing your name fall off their tongue, but you didn’t stop jerking Atsumu off. Especially given that his eyebrows were curled together and his face was growing red indicating that he was about to cum. 

“You should give your number to one of his friends so they can give it to him. I’m giving maybe a month or a week before they break up.” The other woman said, letting out a giggle.

You felt Atsumu’s body tense up and your thumb instantly placed on the one hole that was stopping the thick creamy substance from oozing out his cock. His eyes grew big at the move you made, you never denied him of his orgasm. Not like this.

“I want to hear what she says,” You whispered, your head motioning to the woman behind the closed stall door.

“Hmmm, I would look better on his arm than her.” The woman laughed. “We should do that, let’s go.” 

Just in time, you let go of Atsumu’s cock and your hand freed itself from covering his mouth. Atsumu let out a loud groan of pleasure as his hips bucked into your hand letting his cum shoot out effortlessly. You could hear scandalous gasps behind the stall before you’re unclenching yourself from Atsumu’s cock and coming out the stall.

Your head held high as you pushed in between the two now silent women to wash Atsumu’s cum off your hands. You didn’t say a word as you dried your hands and soon wet a couple of paper towels. You walked over to the stall Atsumu most likely was embarrassingly sunken in, giving him the paper towels to clean himself up with before he soon was stumbling out the stall line a hormonal teenager wanting more. 

The two women's eyes grew big as they scattered to leave the room, one instantly going to text on her phone. Your lips curled into a smirk as you turned to look at Atsumu, your lips curling into a smile.

“Can we go home now Tsumu?” You once again asked as you stepped forward to fix the pants he was wearing. He had forgotten to zip his zipper and while doing the small task, you were sure to let your fingertips graze over his crotch. 

“Sure, just let me go say bye to the guys first. You can just wait in the car,” Atsumu stuttered out. His face is shaded with a bright red color before he’s leaning in to place a peck on your lips.

You would give him your infamous smile before twirling around to leave the bathroom with him. You always will have Atsumu wrapped around your fingers, no matter what Gossip Girl said, his friends, your friends, anyone. Just as you made your way to the exit, you knew everyone was glancing at their phone at the sudden Gossip Girl post.

SPOTTED — Our favorite pop singer Y/N still has her boy toy wrapped around her fingers. Too bad Atsumu friends, she’s here to stay.

XOXO, Gossip Girl 

TAGS — @woahhajime @nanaminshousewife @hhawkz @aasouthteranoswife @touyasghosty @aces-high @serenareiss @festive @cirigiri @stunnababyyabyyy @maboiisuga @harrylovesmc @indiecursor @caribbeanwifey19 @v4ncher @imsuchawh0r3 @chososcums1ut @yuujilove @torapologist @sofiakistein @goofbye @simpfor2bcharacter @awkwardaardvarkforever @atshena @kookieflvr @nekoriots @ambersea7 @getosbunny @silversslut @0rang3wax @xyvezyr @bokenams @@n4namins @whatdidhesayyyy

[twisted-broth]

Cater Diamond Yandere Profile

Warnings: yandere themes, kidnapping, gaslighting, smut, gangbang (I could write about a Cater clone gangbang for hours), very slight noncon, blackmail, slight degrading, PDA

Reader uses he/him pronouns, genitalia is not described

Intelligence/Perceptiveness: 5

Brutality: 1

Physical capability: 10

Mental/emotional instability: 6.5

Restrictiveness: 7

Sexual sadism: 4

Stubbornness: 9.5

What are they generally like? Lucid, aware? Obsessive? How do they behave?

As much as he would like to be delusional, Cater is fully aware of everything he’s doing. He would love to believe that the two of you could have a happy, normal relationship but he knows that if he’s involved, that will never happen.

Cater has a pretty low self esteem. He only posts so many pictures so that he can get a ton of likes and convince himself that people love him. And that’s what he’s going to try and do with you. He needs your validation. He needs you to tell him that you love him and he’s amazing, even if he’ll just call you a liar.

He also wants to have you to get that jealousy from his peers. Look at his super hot boyfriend! Don’t you wish you could have a boyfriend as beautiful and amazing as Cater? Well too bad! Because this one is allllll his.

How likely are they to kidnap their darling? How quickly will they do so?

He really doesn’t want to kidnap you because he wants to be able to keep showing you off to the world as his prize for being so cool. If he kidnaps you, then he would have to come up with some elaborate plan to make it look like you ran away from NRC and he wouldn’t be able to post cute pics with you anymore! He also wants to be able to take you on dates to all the cute little cafes around town and promote them on his Magicam.

If worse comes to worse and he does have to kidnap you, it would be super easy. He has a Cater positioned at every doorway to ensure that there will be no one around to save you when he attacks. If he was feeling really cocky, he would summon a hoard of himself and walk through the halls while you struggled against the real Cater in the middle of the mess, praying that someone could see through the mass of orange hair surrounding you.

How difficult is it to escape from them? How do they keep you restrained? How do they deal with attempted escape? 

While he’s with you? Impossible. You may think that he’s not paying attention but he always is. The minute you start to make a move that he doesn’t like, he summons a handful of clones to surround you. Luckily, Cater isn’t the punishing kind of guy and somewhere in his twisted mind he just assumes that you got lost.

“You’re just feelin antsy, right babe? Ooh! Jade told me about this supes cute picnic spot he found while foraging. We should totes go check it out! I bet it’ll look killer on my Magicam!”

It’s very rare that Cater isn’t with you, but in the off chance he is you might be able to get away for a few hours. Of course he has eyes everywhere so he can find you in no time. In most cases, his delusional mind will save you from punishment. Otherwise, he’ll just get very sad and try to guilt trip you.

How easy are they to trick, deceive, or manipulate?

If you play along with him completely, then you can get your way some of the time. Almost everything you ask for or every place you ask to go is gonna need to be very thoroughly cleared by Cater. For your safety, of course.

Manipulate Cater won’t get him to change his ways, even if you are successful, because he just doesn’t see anything wrong with what he’s doing. He really thinks that you two are in a normal relationship and he’s protecting you.

How lenient are they? What privileges can you have, and what will you be denied?

As long as you go along with him and keep being his perfect boyfriend then your relationship can almost be normal. In general, you go wherever he goes. He’ll transfer all his classes so that the two of you have the exact same schedule and you can join the music club with him! Don’t count on Kalim or Lilia to help you though, they’re kind of oblivious.

You can also convince him to take you a lot of different places, so it’s almost like you have free will. But before you go anywhere, Cater will scout it out before hand just to make sure it’s totally safe for you. Also you can have a phone but you have to be under supervision while using it so you don’t tell anyone something you might regret later.

What kind of rules do they have? What kind of punishment would they use?

“Just don’t go flirting with other guys, ‘kay babe?”

He’s not going to explicitly give you a lot of rules, so you’ll have to try and figure it out on your own. Don’t talk to people unless he’s with you and don’t fight him. As long as you love him or at least pretend to then he’ll be happy.

He really doesn’t do punishments. It would mostly be him gaslighting you or maybe losing your phone privileges for a while. Whatever he does, he’s never going to see it as a punishment; he’ll just see it as him doing what’s best for you.

How do they deal with rivals, or perceived rivals? Will they get rid of them? Will they kill them themselves, or find another way?

The people that Cater would see as a threat would be people he thinks want to hurt you or people who are threatening your relationship. He doesn’t really worry about people who are flirting with you because he trusts you. But if that person was being too pushy and making you uncomfortable, then he would have to take some more extreme measures.

The main Cater will never get his hands dirty, but he has no problems getting his clones to do it for him. And that way he always has an alibi if people start to get worried. His body count (the murder kind) is pretty low but it’s a route he’s not afraid to go down.

How easy is it to make them mad? What does their anger look like?

He really doesn’t get mad. Like at all. The only situation that would cause him to blow his fuse is if he found out you had been telling people “lies” about him or begging them for help. Only then would he maybe blow a fuse.

His response is to go on a whole rant trying to gaslight you. He tells you that the two of you have a totally normal relationship and you’re just worrying people by saying that he’s kidnapping you.

“Baby, what we’re you thinking? Telling Trey that I kidnapped you was totes not cool. What if he told the housewarden? You were the one who said we should stay together! ‘Member? You were sayin how you didn’t feel safe with all these magic people and you wanted to stay in my dorm. C’mon baby, our friends are gonna think I’ve lost it if you keep tellin em this shit! I just wanna keep you safe! I just want to be a good boyfriend.”

His punishment for this would just be forcing you to listen to him cry until you break and comfort him. He’ll keep you in his room for a while with his head on your lap while his tears dampen your jeans. Once he recovers, he’ll make both of you post pics on Magicam so that people know you’re still #goals.

Do they see you as above them, beneath them, or equal to them?

He either sees you as above him or on the same level as him, but never below him. He tells you all the time how great full he is that you chose him and how lucky he is to have you, but he doesn’t think you’re a god. He knows that you can make mistakes and he’s not going to freak out over them like he would if he put you up on that pedestal.

How determined are they for you to love them? How hard will they try to make it happen? Or are they content just having you?

He has himself fully convinced that you do love him, you’re just intimidated by how much he loves you. It’s okay if you’re a little shy babe! He’ll be very patient and teach you to accept his love and to love him in return.

Bonus: Is there anything that makes them unique, in comparison to other yanderes?

He has the social media following and fines to completely erase you from the earth or reinvent you. He’s able to position you to hide the handcuffs and create a super cute selfie that he can post to Magicam with a caption talking about how happy you are. He’s able to look at all your past posts and perfectly replicate something that you would say

He can even drop hints throughout your posts that might explain things if you were to suddenly drop off the web and disappear. “Well, Y/n did always talk about traveling the world so maybe he decided to act on it” is what people would tell the police. We wouldn’t want anyone to worry about you.

General perverseness: how sexual of a person are they? What’s their drive like? How touchy do they get? Do they have any reservations about sexuality?

He actually has a pretty low sex drive compared to most of the other yanderes. He’s definitely the kind of guy to go for romantic sex over rough sex but there will definitely be a good amount of both. If he catches wind of you not loving yourself enough then he will strip you down and point out everything on your body that makes you perfect.

He does also get possessive though, and that can lead to some pretty rough sex (I’ll get into that later). He’s willing to wait as long as you need for your first time but after that, you’ve now opened a door and can expect to go at it every day or every two days. He’ll also hold it over your head if you’re ever mad at him.

“You hate me? You didn’t hate me last night when you had my dick down your throat, eating my cum like it was your last meal on Earth.”

Sexuality-wise, I would label Cater as being pansexual and possibly gender fluid as well. If he thinks you’re hot, then he couldn’t care less what’s in your pants as long as you put it on his face. Like, now please. He’s also not shy in public at all. He won’t fuck you in public, but he will pull you aside and shove his tongue as far down your throat as it will go. He doesn’t care if people are looking. Let them look! They should know that you’re his and his alone.

How forceful are they? Do they care about your willingness?

He’ll be very touchy without your consent but he won’t go any further than that. If you’re not totally into it, then he’s not gonna push you.

That being said, he’s a very physical person. He’ll generally have a hand on you at all times, but it doesn’t always have to be sexual. Sometimes he’ll have a hand on your ass and just give it a small squeeze just to see your reaction.

He may also accidentally grind against you in his sleep or brush his hand against your groin in passing. He’ll be so apologetic if you mention it but he swears it was an accident!

What sort of kinks or fetishes do they have, or would they fill?

Clone gangbang. I’ve had this thought ever since I first learned what his magic is and I will not let it go. If you’re into it, then he’s absolutely into it. There’s a dick filling every hole he can reach, just absolutely destroying you. While there are Caters using you entirely for their pleasure, there are also copies of him that are stroking your hair and gently kissing your body, telling you how good you’re doing; how good you’re taking everything they’re giving you like a perfect little fucktoy.

Another kink of his would be amateur porn. He loves to film the two of you fucking for him to watch later. He also loves taking pictures of you when you’re totally fucked out and covered in his cum. It’s mostly for him but he’s not afraid to use it as blackmail if needed.

Toys! He loves using toys on you for hours before he even touches you. His favorite is the remote control vibrator he can stuff inside you and turn on while you’re in the middle of a conversation with Riddle.

There’s really nothing Cater won’t try at least once. He prefers to top but he’ll let you do it ever once in a while. He may be just a little bit of a sadist with the way he loves to overstim you until your face is red and wet with tears.

What kind of (nsfw) punishments would they use?

Like I said before if he needs to, Cater will use your nudes and videos of the two of you having sex as blackmail. He doesn’t use it as a means to get sex, mostly just when you threaten to leave. He’s not really a huge punishment guy though.

But if something tells him that you’re getting a little too friendly with some of the other guys (but not friendly enough to warrant killing them) then you’re probably in for some rough, possessive sex. Cater doesn’t really like hurting you, but he’s down to take a handful of your hair and yank your head to the side to get access to your neck. He leaves very distinct teeth marks due to his one pointed canine so when you come in with teeth marks and hickeys all over you, everyone knows who gave them.

What body parts of their darling do they like the most?

If you have freckles, he absolutely loves freckles. If you have stretch marks, he thinks that’s the sexiest thing in the world. He goes for every blemish he noticed you scrutinizing and he won’t let you finish until you agree that you’re gorgeous.

He’ll find everything you’re insecure about and take a moment to brush his lips over it before looking you in the eyes and telling you that you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

[babylyctor]

can John actually control time or am i making things up? trying to reach a conclusion via tumblr posting

so as a theory this is 75% vibes. however there’s some things in the books that give me pause, and i wanted to put together all those bits and see if there’s something there. i’m not totally on board with this idea because it seems too complex to leave entirely to the last book, and i don’t know how it could fit with the rest of the narrative (or do i?) but in any case i keep thinking about it so here’s this way too long post. spoliers for everything

first, this fucking suspicious sentence that’s one of the first things John tells Harrow (Chapter 2, HtN)

"I would let you come back, bit by bit, until you felt entirely ready to wake up. I can’t. I mastered Death, Harrowhark; I wish I’d done the smarter thing and mastered Time. I have to ask you to get ready soon, and so I am going to show you something I hope might … trigger your readiness.”

so this sounds like a really dull complaint on this immortal god’s part but also i don’t trust a single thing out of this man’s mouth, and this would be the exact kind of private joke he would make if he had actually mastered Time (capitalized) too. Also the context in which it’s said, talking about Harrow coming back from her coma, regaigning consciousness, awakening... you get it, oddly relevant theme wise.

then there’s the whole Soup Moment (Chapter 25, HtN), in which John seems to actually stop time maybe? i have doubts about this so lets see what our narrator tells us;

And God said, “Stop.”

The world slowed down. Augustine and Mercymorn stopped, arrested in the act of half-rising from their seats. Ianthe stopped, left arm paused, outflung, to shield her face. You stopped, sitting upright in your chair: your bones somehow rigid and still, and your flesh chilly and rigid around those bones. The shrapnel spray from the Saint of Duty did not stop, [...] But what remained of him stopped too, half man, half rupture—his prurient details hot and white, naked insides clothed with the sinus-drying burst of the power of God.

so here John freezes all the lyctors in place, they’re still conscious, or at least Harrow is, but they have their range of movement almost totally restricted. this is not like Mercy pinching Harrow’s dorsal nerve to paralyze her, this is a completely different feeling, maybe John’s thalergetic powers? it would make sense, all the lyctors are living bodies, they have thalergy and Johs is able to manipulate that, presumably. the bits of Gideon OG cascading down the table don’t stop but that might be John selectively using his powers, or it might be that that’s no longer living flesh.

so we’re saying this could just be John’s super special thalergy magic and nothing else. the first problem though is that technically he shouldn’t be able to use it against his lyctors without touching them, thanks to lyctoral invisibility. in fact when he explodes Mercy’s chest (rip in peace queen) he expressely reaches out and touches her to do so, because presumably he needs to make contact with a body in order to use magic against it, same as Mercy. so that’s a caveat, then there are these descriptions from the same Soup Moment;

You stared down the table at him: at the blank, remote faces of your two nominal teachers—at the frozen ivory stillness of Ianthe, her hair now whitish pink—at space outside the window, where the asteroids themselves seemed to hang in tranquilized arrest.

The Emperor of the Nine Houses stood. The spell, whatever it had been, dropped like a white sun setting.

These seem to imply certain ambiguity. John’s God and all that but i don’t think thalergetic magic should be able to affect asteroids, lifeless space rocks. of course it says they “seem” to hang in tranquilized arrest, not that they are really unmoving, but i think it’s a suggestive sentence all the same, and i’m suspicious of every word Muir writes. The second quote, specifically the highlighted part, is also a bit frustrating. It seems to imply that John isn’t exactly doing magic as we know it, but something else. If it was Harrow narrating we could go further with it, but since it’s Gideon we could simply attribute it to her lack of knowledge and familiarity with magic. However, two sentences after that we don’t have that problem;

The construct gamely clamberign our of the Saint of Duty dwindled to a powder of pink dust. The shard you had been driving up the cervical vertebrae to the base of the spine [...] simply disappeared: destroyed or removed, you could not tell.

This is still Gideon narrating but in this case she’s specifically telling us that Harrow doesn’t understand what John just did, it’s not magic Harrow is familiar with. There’s also the contrast between what we know is a normal process of destroying a construct - reducing it to dust -  vs this mysterious disappearance, that doesn’t really fit into what we know so far about the way thanergy/thalergy work.

so far, nothing conclusive, we know John is really powerful, but we don’t know exactly how, where his power comes from or what it can do. Then there’s the moment he unexplodes himself (Chapter 52, HtN);

White light.

It bleached the insides of your nose and the back of your throat. It hurt coming out your ears. It bled out your eyeballs. It wasn’t a flash of light, more … a suddenness; when it was gone—as though it hadn’t even existed, but had been a luminous hallucination—time stopped.

That light took colour from the room—everyone was a slow-motion cavalcade of greys, of eyes caught widening, of mouths parting in stone-shaded articulations of shock.

It happened in an instant. It happened over a myriad. A wet red construct knitted itself back together, [...]

again that white light that has been associated with thalergy magic and again all these references to time slowing down, stopping or just behaving in strange ways in general. again lots of ambiguity, this could be a thalergy based power - the ability to hold living bodies in stasis, and therefore make everyone feel like time has slowed down - or it could be that John is actually affecting time, maybe even reversing it (?) since he literally un-exploded himself, after Mercy put all her millenia of expertise into atomizing him and reducing him to almost nothing.

is that even explicable with regular thanergy/thalergy based magic? i’m not sure, a regular necro could never do that, a lyctor couldn’t do that. So if John isn’t just an overpowered lyctor what’s the difference exactly? i mean, how do his powers manifest differently from those of every other necromancer we know?

the other person we’ve seen using powerful thalergy magic is Silas. Whenever he siphoned, Gideon describes a similar vacuum sensation to the one that John’s magic also provokes, as well as white light;

As he faded, the pale Silas incandesced. He glowed with an irradiated shimmer, iridescent white, and the air began to taste of thunder. (Chapter 17, GtN)

Gideon felt an internal tug, like a blanket being pulled off in the cold. (Chapter 17, GtN)

Silas clambered to his knees, clasped his fingers together, and the feeling of suction popped the pressure in both of Gideon’s ears. (Chapter 34, GtN)

Silas is nowhere near as powerful as John but siphoning - thalergy based magic, condemned by God - still causes that suction effect and is marked by white light and lightning, just like John’s magic. However, there’s no mention of a time altering effect, no slowing down, no freezing in place, and seeing how both kinds of magic are similarly coded otherwise i find this difference suspicious.

To end this somewhere, two quotes, first, this thing Harrow tells Ortus when they both discuss what it must be like to be a lyctor (Chapter 5, HtN);

“Nigenad, what would be the tragedy in living for a myriad? Ten thousand years to learn everything there is to know [...] What is the tragedy of time?”

honestly to me that sounds like Muir making Harrow say things she will regret later. of course it could be about any of the numerous tragedies in Harrow life but still, gave me pause, specially because it kinda echoes John’s earlier sentiment, wishing he had mastered Time.

finally, a quote that might be totally meaningless and completely off base in this theory or it could round it up perfectly, i haven’t decided yet;

[...] ; yet you prayed all the while knowing Ianthe’s facility for tergiversation would have given the whole universe pause. (Chapter 36, HtN)

we know Ianthe is a girlboss and gaslighting is her thing. However, isn’t this sentence a bit too dramatic to describe Ianthe? doesn’t it sound kinda ominous to you? it definitely does to me, and although it might totally be my Ianthe bias wanting her to play an important part, who is Ianthe hanging out with lately? exactly John God “Jod” the Emperor.

in conclusion, i haven’t reached any conclusion. but i still think there’s something off with John’s powers beyond what we’ve been told, which isn’t much really, and i think there’s something going on with Time within the narrative (that’s another whole post though), and i think these two things are most probably related. but i can’t say i’m 100% sure of any of it. this was fun though. if you made it here thank you so much you’re the best <3

[flamingo-writes]

Ch. 2: Things That We Remember [TASM!Peter Parker x Reader]

Keep You On My Side, Chapter 2: Things That We Remember

Andrew Garfield!Peter Parker x [Female] Reader

[Previous] [Next]

A/N: I swear to god, I am projecting myself way too much in this fic, I'm sorry hvunuifsd I also included characters from the different spiderman comics ;) and a few OC's of my own.

Summary: Peter comes to a realization that cleared his mind, as he found himself orbiting your general direction unconsciously. Weird feelings start to grow inside him, as well as recognizing his own loneliness due to his line of work. You on the other hand have mixed feelings, liking Peter sharp mindedness, and at the same time knowing that same sharp mind of his might be a threat to your secret.

Warnings: Mentions of sexual harassment, misogynistic behavior, vandalism and bullying. Nothing too descriptive. Throughout the entirety of the fanfic there's gonna be a ever present theme of abuse of power as well as punk ideologies.

Word Count: 7.6K

As Peter’s mind kept circling over and over Lauren’s text, his mind was still digesting her last text. ’ Loonie liked you ’. Something about her words was making his stomach twist and tickle in funny ways; he’d forgotten how it felt to be into someone.

‘ She did? ’ He typed without being able to think of anything else. As he stared at the blinking cursor waiting for his next word. He chuckled awkwardly feeling too self aware in the matter. He asked himself why was he behaving like a teenager with a crush on the most popular girl. It was lame, or so he thought.

“C’mon, Peter. It’s not that hard,” He told himself.

‘ She didn't seem too convinced ’ He typed next not too satisfied with his own reply but clicked the send button anyways.

‘ She liked you. Otherwise you wouldn't have lasted with us at the table. ’ A couple of laughing emojis followed Lauren’s last text, making Peter chuckle and stare at his screen dreamily.

‘ She's that crazy? ’

‘ You don't remember her at all, do you? ’ He frowned gently at her text, as he suddenly wondered if he had met you before. Sure, your face and something about you felt familiar, but he was sure he’d remember meeting someone like you. You didn’t really have a standard personality, whatever the hell that meant; nor your vibes felt like something he’d see every so often.

‘ I...should I? ’

' Omg Peter! She's my sister! '

His eyebrows frowned even more as he tried to remember. And then, the memories hit him like a train.

' Say whaaat? ' He replied.

That's why you felt oddly familiar, he thought. He'd seen you in the halls at school. Your hair looked different back then, but still had the same atmosphere. The atmosphere of some mysterious creature lying in wait.

' Yeah, she was two years below us '

As Peter continued remembering stances of seeing you in school, you were for the most part low profile. He did remember what your usual style for school was, band t-shirts, dark jeans, and he did remember hearing you every once in a while yelling, calling people out loudly for unfair or sexiest behavior.

He hummed and nodded his face as he remembered one time taking a pic of one the lockers with a big sticker that read ' Punk is not dead ' and remembered Lauren once mentioning that it was her sister's locker.

' Wait, wasn't your sister the crazy punk girl who messed with Flash's car after a party? '

Man, the Trashed Car Incident was a highly popular story in school. There was a party, which Peter missed for being patrolling the city, but he still heard all about it and saw the pictures. The house was full of crazy teenagers desperately getting drunk and touching each other. God knows how many souls could fit in that small house in the suburbs. However, by the time Flash wanted to leave and went back to his fancy Audi A3 just taken out of the agency, he saw it. The tires were flat, and in neon spray painting, it read: " For all my sister's being touched without their consent, and had their reputations trashed while yours got elevated. See what it's like to have something you care for be hammered " signed with the initials PRG .

Flash wasn't exactly the best guy. He'd seduce all the pretty girls. It's rumored he'd make bets with his friends about who got a specific girl to sleep with them first. In parties he'd get drunk and end up fooling around with any drunk girl standing next to him at the time. He never really forced himself on them. They'd never say no to Flash, but they wouldn't say yes either. Many of those girls got called sluts afterwards. And Flash would be praised. And it always followed the same cycle. Over and over again.

The signature PRG came from a nickname Flash had given you. You were in your freshman year, and Flash was a sophomore. He tried getting his way with you but found it hard to seduce you. And in his futile attempt, he'd given you the name Punk Rock Girl . It was a reference to a band you apparently liked. However, Flash completely ruined the song for you as you were ‘more interested in hanging out with the raccoons at the dumpster’ than going out with Flash, as rumors had it, you’d told him. After having rejected him a handful of times, Flash started spreading rumours about you, ruining your reputation in the process. But how little you cared was outstanding. Since you barely even reacted to said rumours, soon they stopped and people instead ignored them like you did. This pissed off Flash.

However, it wasn’t until you messed with his car, he truly developed a huge disliking of you. And since that event, Flash didn’t dare to mess with you any longer, as he’d seen the lengths you’d go to. And thus, having earned the title of Loonie.

‘ The one and only Punk Rock Girl. ’ Lauren replied.

‘ Can I ask how did she not get expelled? Everyone was saying she was gonna be kicked out, ’ He asked.

‘ Oof, she called him out on his behavior and did it so well the principal didn’t really have any good argument to expel her. Also because she defended her actions saying the car event happened outside the school grounds and therefore the school has no jurisdiction in the matter. And well, our mom is a lawyer, she backed up her statement ’

‘ Didn’t she get in trouble with your parents? ’

‘ Oh she did, but she said she’d do it again if it means helping other women from being taken advantage of and manipulated. She accepted the punishment our parents gave her. She paid for the damage of Flash’s car with her own savings, but she still told Flash she’d gladly trash his car again if she heard he was still being an asshole to women ’

‘ Wow… ’

‘ Exactly, wow ’

Ultimately, the principal had no option but to let you stay in school. Especially because he knew if you spoke out loud about this issue, it would put the school in a bad position in the public eye. Sure, you hated the fact that the principal didn't do anything to Flash, but at least he didn't kick you out either.

' Damn, I never knew much about all of it besides Punk Rock Girl hammering Flash’s car and almost getting expelled… ’ He typed next.

‘ Yeah, she told us not to spread the whole story ’ Peter frowned softly at her reply, as she raised an eyebrow, curious at your reasoning behind it.

‘ How come? ’

‘ She likes to keep her privacy ’

‘ A punk who won't stay silent about injustice yet likes to stay off the spotlight, huh? ’ Peter wrote.

‘ Punks are loud not because they care for the spotlight, but because they care for change, they want the truth to be heard and spread ideas that’ll benefit minorities. They don’t do it for fame and praise. They do it because if it’s not them, then things won’t change on their own ’ His eyes widened in surprise as he reread that a couple of times before replying.

‘ That’s beautiful ’ He texted.

‘ She wrote that line once for a paper ’ Peter hummed an affirmative as he nodded his head, thinking it did make sense if it was something you’d written. It did sound an awful lot like you, to be fair. He could say that with certainty without knowing he had read your writing before.

‘ I love her. She does help me a lot with the band ’ Lauren sent.

‘ That's nice of her ’ He replied as he kept thinking about you.

He kept texting Lauren until she told him she was heading to bed. And with that, they said their goodbyes. However, Peter’s mind kept going, thinking of the rumors people spread about you, and how they always seemed to be...out of character? People called you all sorts of awful things, although, when Peter thought about it, the only people you messed with were the popular kids, and it was never unjustified. So believing all the rumours about you being mean and a bully or doing weird stuff was hard. At least for Peter.

Despite not really paying much attention to you during school, he did remember thinking you were cool for standing up so fearlessly for those who needed it. You let people spread rumors about you without raising your voice, but as soon as you saw someone get bullied, you were the first one to throw punches and yell at the oppressor. Peter respected that. And he knew that and wished he had the chance of meeting you, although back then he was slightly intimidated by your reputation, he never really approached you.

Not until now at least. Although, to be fair, he didn't know it was the infamous Punk Rock Girl he had been talking to at the bar that night. And perhaps that lack of knowledge was what allowed him to calmly approach you. The fact that now he knew who you were made it all more exciting. He still couldn't pinpoint what he felt for you, but you sure sparked something within him. And if you in some way or another ever reciprocated, he'd be surprised with himself.

On the other hand, you kept frantically going around the fact that Peter had picked up on you being as reserved as apparently MJ was. It was a very tiny slip, but one that was picked up by someone. You thought you needed to be more careful. And kept replaying that scene in your head over and over again.

As you stood behind your desk, staring at a blank document with a blinking cursor, wanting to type down the spiral of thoughts you kept going through. Your two other roommates were asleep as it was late night. And you didn't hear your third roommate walk in, whistling and closing the door behind him.

Clueless as to how your roommate went to the kitchen, left something in the fridge and then walked towards you, still whistling and banging his head to the rhythm of the music playing in his headphones.

All while your head kept going around Peter. His sharp mind, working almost like a sixth sense of sorts. How did he so easily picked up on it? If you kept being so mysterious, he'd end up figuring out you were MJ. That was if you were gonna see him in the future. Why would you see him in the future? You hadn't seen him since your sister and him graduated high school, and a few random stops at the coffee shop you worked at, but he never seemed to notice you. Until now. Why now? The poetic melodic voice in your mind kept pointing fingers at the romantic idea of fate. But what else could be expected of a writer if not to exaggerate and turn memories into potential story tropes?

The unseen notification of your sister's last text was shining bright on your screen. Haunting you.

'Peter Parker is interested in you, did you know that? ;) '

Of course you knew that. You'd seen the way he behaved tonight. Trying to get to know you, giving you charming smiles and over all polite gestures. Which did appeal to you, but you knew better than to get closer. You meant what you told him about the trust issues. At least when it came to dating. After your first and last boyfriend had cheated on you with a girl you took class with, you knew you didn't want to go through something like that again.

"Can't sleep?" Your roommate said looking over your shoulder.

His voice suddenly intruding in your thought train pulled you so violently away from your trance you flinched and squealed. His first reaction was to giggle as he put his hand on your shoulder.

"Yo, calm down it's me" He said softly. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. Saw you on your computer and thought you'd probably been there for a while, so I brought you pizza" He said handing you a small plate with two thin slices.

"Ah–, thanks Miles" You sighed and looked at him, taking the plate off his hand. "No, it's fine, I was… spacing out"

"Yeah, I noticed," He chuckled and looked at your blank screen, raising an eyebrow and giggling.

"I didn't know we had pizza" You said staring at the plate, thinking you weren’t hungry, although you hadn’t eaten anything since lunch.

"We do now. Went out to have a couple of drinks with my uncle Aaron. We had pizza at the bar, and I remembered we didn't have anything back home. My uncle Aaron insisted on paying for the pizza, though" Miles explained with a soft smirk.

"Tell your uncle Aaron he rocks" You chuckled and took a bite of the pizza, moaning softly. “This is good…” You muttered to yourself.

"He knows he’s cool. You good, though? You seem stressed…" He said taking a spare chair next to your seat and looked at you.

Feeling the weight of your own eye bags, and slightly dissociated mind, you shook your head softly.

"I met a guy who's a big MJ fan" You replied as Miles clicked his tongue and hummed an affirmative.

"Ah, I see…another identity hound?” He said, giving you a knowing smirk as you nodded.

Normally, you could easily deflect these people you called Identity Hounds. More of them were paranoid people who believed all the rumours about MJ. Most rumours were created on your own in order to deflect them. Like MJ being a guy.

"Yeah, except this guy has a sharper mind that everyone I've come across before… " You said, biting the tip of your thumb, thinking.

"Oh, not good” Miles sighed as he leaned against the backrest.

"Hopefully I won't be seeing him soon nor often” You sighed, somewhat relieved by your own consolation. You had absolutely no idea if that was gonna be the case, but you still tried to cling to the idea of New York being a city big enough to not see him in a while.

Although, life had other plans

"I hope so, man.” Miles said leaning forward and resting a hand on your shoulder. “Anyways, I'm heading to bed. See ya tomorrow, Loon. Don’t stay up too late, yeah?" He said as he walked towards his room and you continued to stare at your blank document.

"Night, Miles…" You purred, not sure if he’d heard you or not.

It definitely took you a while to feel sleepy. And during that whole time, you remained staring at the blank screen with little to no success. It was hard to tell whether it was still 2 am or the clock already marked 3 by the time you went to bed. Your mind was still going in circles about the odd person Peter Parker was. He was oddly observant and far more sharper than most people. He was cute and charming, but the moment he started connecting dots no one had even seen in the first place, you decided it was going to be best to keep your distance.

The next morning, it wasn’t hard to ignore the alarm, and what felt like the first time in months, you actually stopped your alarm without snoozing. Sighing tiredly, as four, perhaps five, hours of sleep was all you got, although your mind still seemed to be all over the place. And without wasting much time, you went to the swimming pool, as per usual; however, this time, it wasn’t out of healthy habits you were trying to stick to, it was because you wanted to free your mind from the intrusive thoughts, even if it was just for an hour.

After leaving the pool, you headed to your job at a small coffee shop, where you’d spend the next 10 hours making coffee and warming up croissants for picky eaters. And if there was a bit of free time, you'd go to a small table not far from the wooden bar and you'd sit behind your laptop and work on your novel.

Any MJ writing you'd always keep it to the confines of your apartment. In case there were people with wandering eyes. And also by dividing your time between your writing and MJ's you actually managed to get things written for both authors.

The soft doorbell jingled as the door opened and closed. Your eyes looking up to the door as you felt your stomach turn cold.

'God, no…' You thought.

As you wondered what were the chances of Peter showing up here the very next day after you "met" him. You thought Murphy had a nasty sense of humor.

Getting up from your table, you went to the cash register as you cursed at every deity of chaos for putting you in such a situation. As you avoided looking at him, you acted as if you didn't know who was behind the bar.

"Good afternoon what can I–" You said looking up and feigning surprise as Peter also faked a surprised look and called your name.

"Hey, it's good to see you" He said, chuckling softly, as he thought his spidey sense kinda did tell him something was gonna happen, although nothing bad nor dangerous.

"Yeah. Also… odd… " You said, frowning softly. "I'd never seen you here before" You lied.

Peter chuckled awkwardly as he thought of how suspicious it was. But it had been a coincidence that he was there.

"I am taking pics for the paper I work at… And happened to be around here. I woke up late, got late to work and I actually forgot to have breakfast…" He chuckled awkwardly, however, every single word he said had been true.

"I see" You nodded, not sure if you believed him, though. But gave him the benefit of the doubt. "What can I get you, then?"

"Coffee, please!" He groaned dramatically. "The biggest cup you have"

"20 ounces?" You asked as you were ready to grab a paper cup for him, not being impressed by the amount of coffee as you’ve had people drink excessive amounts of coffee on a daily basis as you simply stared both amazed and worried.

"Wait no, that's too much…" He corrected immediately as he sighed and shyly pointed at the paper cup next to the largest one.

"Sixteen?" You asked as he nodded and you grabbed it.

"Yeah, better" He sighed.

"So, American coffee?"

As you were ready to write down his order, he spoke and said:

"A latte, instead. Changed my mind. Any kind of milk is fine" Nodding, you wrote down his instructions before turning to the screen pad and typed his order there.

Peter paid close attention to your features as you clicked a few options here and there, thinking you were quite beautiful, and how your face hadn’t really changed much since he graduated. At the same time, feeling slightly embarrassed at the fact that he hadn’t recognized you from school. He tried justifying it in the poor lighting and flashing lights from the bar. Although he knew it was a bullshit excuse. Perhaps he had been too busy between getting used to being Spiderman, losing his uncle Ben and then falling for Gwen to really notice your face, despite knowing what people said about you.

"Noted. Something else?" You said, breaking him from his thoughts.

"Oh, not sure. I don’t come here often…" He said looking at the desserts on the counter "What do you recommend?"

"The muffins are very good. We have butter, chocolate chips, blueberry… " You said gazing over the counter, feigning a lack of interest, although you knew far too well Peter caught your curiosity like very few things in life.

"Oh, blueberry, please"

You nodded as you charged him, handed him his change and proceeded to work on his coffee as he looked around nervously, feeling uncomfortable by the growing silence.

"You're the only one?" He said breaking the growing awkwardness, as you met his dark eyes and nodded.

"Barista, yes. At least for the time being… There are two people in the kitchen who make the sandwiches. A coworker should arrive in an hour or so…"  You explained as you warmed up his muffin and finished his coffee. "Have a good day, Pete…" You said handing him his things. You exchanged stares before smiling politely at him.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" He asked curiously, staring at you straight in the eye as you felt oddly exposed and looked away shyly.

"Sure" Was everything you could reply as you started to feel nervous as to what could Peter possibly ask you.

"Why didn't you tell me we went to the same school or that you were Lauren's sister?" He said, genuinely concerned, a part of him still feeling guilty over not recognizing you in the first place.

"Mystery is fun. Besides  I am a pretty private person… " Peter chuckled as he thought he should've expected that to be your answer.

"Yeah, we established that last night," Peter chuckled. "You Mysterious Writers are a very interesting species"

"It's almost an unconscious marketing technique" You added with a soft giggle as you wiggled your eyebrows at him playfully.

"Hey, it could help you sell once you publish your novel"

"I might give it an actual try" You added as you gazed over at your laptop with the open document as Peter followed your stare and nodding immediately knowing it was yours.

"Anyways, thanks…" He purred your name softly as he looked into your eyes, the text Lauren sent him circling his mind still. "So, see you around?"

"Yeah, I guess" You replied smiling back at him.

Peter turned around, feeling his heart racing all of a sudden. A cheeky smile on his cheeks as he knew where to find you. Although, right before he got any closer to the door, he stopped in his tracks and spun on his heels. And walking back to the bar, he met your eyes again as you squinted yours and smirked.

"Oh hey, before I go… Can I ask you for one last thing?" He said, his cheeky grin spreading through his cheeks making him look all too cute.

"Sure" You said with a pretty obvious suspicious tone making him laugh softly.

"I kinda meant what I said about seeing you around… I'd like to hang out sometime soon… if that's fine with you of course...I had fun last night" Something in his voice told you he was actually telling the truth as you looked at him, noticing the growing puppy look in his eyes.

"Have you've always been this persuasive?"  You said rolling your eyes and returning the playful smirk, although yours had a more sassy tone to it.

"I prefer to use the word charming" He said, smiling proudly.

"Let me guess, you were a teacher's pet?" The weight of the marker in the pocket of your apron seemed to grow with every word you exchanged.

"I'm not gonna deny nor confirm anything" You laughed at his reply.

"You definitely were a teacher's pet. Dorky, polite, smart… You have the entire profile of a teacher’s pet" You said as you grabbed the marker and played idly with it in your fingers as Peter was paying close attention to your every move.

"Say teacher’s pet one more time…" He said in a playful threatening voice as his smirk spread across his face.

"Peter Parker, the teacher's pet" You teased as you stared at him and raised an eyebrow.

Peter chuckled and pretended to be offended, dramatically stepping back and placing a hand over his chest. He was also surprised at the fact that you did know his full name, making him even more ashamed of not having recognized you.

"I'll play along as long as I can get your number" He answered as he got closer to the bar again.

"Now, that's manipulation" You said squinting your eyes and frowning, however your cheeky smile was still there, hypnotizing Peter.

"It's only manipulation if it works… is it… working?" Peter said with a smirk.

"I'm not gonna deny nor confirm anything" You said as you grabbed a napkin and wrote down your number and doodled a small frog next to it out of habit and handed it to him. "I don't like how persuasive you are, Parker" You chuckled.

"Too much power, huh?" He said, his smile leaning towards one side of his face.

He called your name one last time. Before gently waving and thanking you for the napkin as he left hopping happily with long strides as you chuckled and rolled your eyes.

Your mind lingered on him. He was smart, and witty, oddly straightforward with his flirting, but damn, was he charming. It was hard to resist. You wondered if that's why Gwen Stacy had fallen for him. She was incredibly centered, smart and focused in her studies. Many guys tried getting in her pants and she'd epically rejected them. But not Peter. He was smart. And so quick to make a comeback or jokes. That was hot. Although, something about how quick he was to think scared you a bit. How long would it take him to figure out you were MJ? And if he did, what would you do next?

If he were to find out, you'd have no other chance but to keep him around, and get him to keep the secret. But you still didn't know Peter good enough to know how trustworthy he was. How good was he at keeping secrets? You barely knew anything about the guy other than he'd usually use his skateboard inside school, take pics for the school paper and events, date Gwen and that he was a huge science nerd. Not enough information to properly form an opinion.

"Who was that?" Your friend Kylie said as she walked out of the kitchen. “I saw you two giggling and chatting…”

“Some guy who used to go to school with me” You replied, thinking.

“He’s cute” She said looking at you with curious eyes, wanting to see your reaction and what you had to say on the matter.

“Yeah. And very smart. And that’s a big problem…” You purred looking at her. “In less of an hour he made a comment about how MJ and I are similar…” You whispered.

“Oh, shit…That’s bad…” She muttered her eyes now opening in surprise.

“Yeah”

“Hey, another question, did you bring the pizza last night? I grabbed a slice for lunch today…” You noticed immediately Kylie had changed the topic in an attempt to distract you from Peter. She knew how people bringing up MJ’s identity made you tense almost as a reflex, and was trying to get your mind off of it.

“It was Miles” You said, snapping out a bit from your thought spiral as you looked at Kylie, her bottle green hair still felt weird to you as she’d dyed her hair just two days ago. “Well, to be precise, his uncle Aaron…Aaron bought us pizza” You said chuckling softly.

“Oh, Aaron is so sweet. I swear, he’s like the father of all of us renting that apartment…” Kylie said, dramatically resting her hand on her chest as you chuckled.

The day went by, and eventually your other roommate made it to the coffee place for his shift. Helping you out making coffee while Kylie and another cook worked in the kitchen. Shortly after, your shift was done; however you stayed the afternoon at the coffee shop working on your draft, your mind every once in a while wandering back to Peter as you'd take a few notes in another document as a personal essay in order to get those thoughts off your mind and be able to keep writing.

'Last night I felt almost as if my soul had returned to my body. I saw that familiar red and blue flash swinging past the corner, and I was more than glad to see he was back. Our friendly neighborhood Spiderman is back, doing what he does best.

I am saddened to say that that's how the usual Spiderman cycle goes. He goes missing, people realize how much we need him, he comes back, people are kind, then media start manipulating information, making him look bad, people forget everything he's done for us… Rinse and repeat.

Not me. I could never forget all the things he's done for us. For me. And I hope most people are like me in this sense.

Whoever wears the mask, I hope you get to read this. And if that's the case, I hope you're doing well. I want to thank you for everything you've done. And for everything you'll do in the future. You're far more valuable to the city than what people give you credit for. Please remember this.

It's good to have the friendly neighborhood Spiderman back'

On Monday, the office of The Daily Bogle was a raging ruckus again. Jameson was throwing his tantrum about never working with MJ again, making it pretty clear that he disliked the idea that the writer that brought more attention to the paper was a Spiderman supporter, something Jameson wasn't. He even went the extra mile to have an article for tomorrow's paper about the return of Spiderman and the possible bad impact it might have in New York.

"Leeds!" Jameson shouted.

"Sir!" Ned flinched softly as he stood up from his chair.

"Write that bastard an email telling him we don't want to work with him ever again, and while you're there, tell him to go screw himself, I don't like vigilante supporters"

"I-I… sir…" Ned nodded and sat back in his seat.

Peter frowned, annoyed by the latest request his neurotic boss had just ordered. Not only because that meant losing contact with MJ altogether, he now didn't have any chance. He sighed deeply as Gloria and Ned exchanged looks and Peter got up from his seat holding his camera.

"Parker! Where do you think you're going?" Jameson barked.

"Take some pictures for the paper" He sighed annoyed.

"Don't take too long. Make sure to eat in the meantime, you'll be using your lunch break to get those pics ready for printing. Bring decaf coffee, I asked Angela to buy more but she didn't bring it!"

Peter rolled his eyes and left. Feeling frustrated, he headed towards your workplace hoping to see a familiar face that'll bring him comfort.

Truth was, Peter didn't keep any friends. How could he? He felt his secret identity might be a danger to whoever was close to him. And normally kept people at a distance.

However, something was drawing him towards you. Perhaps the desire to have someone to go to when he wanted to vent about his day and get his mind off his burdens, like people normally did with friends. That and the fact that you simply caught his attention. You were smart and laid back despite the present mystery surrounding you. And the way your eyes focused on him with the same intrigue as his, it was hard for him not to meet your gaze and get lost in it. It was something he'd forgotten how it felt like.

He stopped behind the glass door, as he asked himself what exactly was he doing there. Peter didn't know for sure. Your silhouette moving back and forth behind the coffee bar along with another guy as you exchanged words and laughs together, the line getting shorter as you two worked together. A gentle smile spread through his face, not noticing how creepy he looked staring as you cluelessly worked not really noticing due to the rush hour of people getting coffee.

As you registered orders and wrote down instructions on paper cups, you heard the bell jingling softly as you sighed thinking how rush hour couldn't get any busier. However, you kept working, begging for that last person to be the last customer for the next half an hour at least.

Which turned out to be true. As you kept taking orders, you didn't hear the doorbell ring any further. As the line got shorter and shorter, you could only feel more and more relieved with every passing customer as you had been taking orders nonstop for an hour now. You weren’t paying attention to who was in line, mostly taking note of how many people were left.

Finally, as your rearview got a glimpse of the last customer left, you handed Andy, your coworker and roommate, a paper cup with the instructions written down. As you turned back to the pad on the cash register, your lips moved on their own, greeting automatically.

“Good morning, welcome to the Coffee Pot, what can I–” You stopped as you looked up holding your marker ready to write down orders as you met Peter’s stare, your heart skipping a beat and your mind suddenly turning blank as you weren’t expecting him. Three days in a row, you thought. “Peter?” You asked surprised as you chuckled awkwardly. “I’m seeing you a lot lately, huh?” You said with a sarcastic tone.

“Not stalking, I swear” Peter added with a gentle laugh. “I’m running away from my work for a while. My boss is driving me insane” Peter explained, slightly nervous as he knew how odd it was that for two days straight, he’d gone to your workplace unannounced. He sighed softly, slightly defeated. “I’m not having the best day, and wanted to go someplace where I can get my mind off of it”

His voice got lower and sounded genuine, as you could pick up on the annoyance in his voice. You pushed your lips together as your eyebrows lifted, feeling sorry for him, despite not knowing what truly was happening to him. You simply felt sympathy and knew how not having a good day felt like, as well as the urge to get your mind off your work for a while. You nodded and grabbed a paper cup and wrote down the coffee he’d asked you for the day before as you still remembered his order.

“I hope you want what you ordered yesterday” You said chuckling, trying to comfort him.

“You remember what I had yesterday?” He replied, his face changing as a smirk spread through his lips.

“I’ve got a good memory” You replied as you handed Andy the paper cup and grabbed a blueberry muffin.

“Oh, no, please” He said, sighing your name softly. “I’ve only got cash for the coffee…” He said.

“The muffin’s on me, Pete” You said handing him the muffin in a small paper bag.

“Oh come on” He whined.

“I’m serious. You’re having a bad day, and I wanna help turn it around” The gentle smile you gave Peter left him breathless for a second as he forgot for a moment why he was even in a bad mood to begin with. He clicked his tongue and grabbed the paper bag from you.

“When you put it that way, it is hard to say no” He said as he handed you a bill. “Let me repay you sometime”

“I did a random act of kindness, Peter. Not a favor. You don’t owe me anything” You said with a confident tone, trying to get him to stop insisting.

“Random act of kindness, huh? Okay, as a random act of kindness, I’ll take you out someday to a churro cart close to Rafferty Triangle…” He said as he looked at you with playful eyes and a soft smile.

“Peter…” You sighed, your voice getting lower.

“There’s this Puerto Rican lady who has a churro cart, they’re great! They’re stuffed with nutella and–”

“Stop using my phrases against me” You cut him off with a soft giggle as you realized which kind of person Peter was. And he was the kind of person who somehow felt obligated to return favors or compensate others.

“Why?” He laughed.

“Copyright? I don’t know…” You chuckled knowing it hadn’t been your best comeback.

“No, not gonna buy that one” He teased. “Let me do something nice for you someday”

Truth was, Peter was now grasping at any chance he had to spend time with you. Any little excuse to get to see you or talk to you drew him in. Something about you was so fascinating to him, he needed to take any chance to be with you.

“I mean, you already are. You are consuming in the place I work at” You said as you looked around. Very briefly locking stares with your coworker Andy, as he gave you a knowing stare, noticing the flirting going both ways with the two of you.

“You know what I mean,” Peter added.

“I do…” Andy handed you Peter’s coffee as you handed it to him, since Peter was still by the cash register. He grabbed the paper cup, his fingers brushing yours and he intentionally lingered there. Noticing how you intentionally remained there holding his cup for a few seconds, his hand next to yours before letting go. Something that lasted far too long, burning each other’s skin as you both wondered what exactly was happening and how exactly you felt about the other.

“Thanks…” He said as he met your stare briefly before looking away shyly.

“You’re leaving already?” You asked softly as you thought he’d stay longer. You wanted him to stay longer.

“You see, I have to, quote-unquote work…” He chuckled.

“I see…” You sighed slightly disappointed, but without anything to say. “You mentioned working at a paper, can I ask which one?”

“The Daily Bogle” Something in his answer made your gentle look suddenly turned bitter.

“You work there?” You asked, your voice coming out a lot more sour than intended. ‘No offence, but I kinda hate that paper…” You chuckled awkwardly, however, you didn’t want to hide your discomfort in the matter.

“Not the best place, but puts bread on the table” Peter sighed, as you could tell from his reply he wasn’t exactly happy to work there.

“You’re a photographer there?” You asked as bit by bit you began connecting dots.

“Yeah…”

“I see” You said looking away, suddenly too deep in your thoughts as you remembered a couple of things you’d heard about The Daily Bogle and remembering each and every article you’ve read there that made you dislike it. “Wait, so you’re the guy who takes pics of Spiderman?” You asked curiously as you’d heard there was only one photographer in New York who managed to get pics of Spiderman.

“So people say” Peter said, suddenly getting on guard as he thought you were quick to realize it.

“Do you like him?” You asked, your voice turning serious, as you knew you were being straightforward right now, but now that this information about Peter had come out, you thought it was important to know where he stood, before making any more progress. What he replied now would define what you thought of him and how close you wanted him to be.

“Spiderman? I think he’s a swell guy” He replied, shrugging it off, making it seem like he didn’t think much on the matter.

“Then why would you do that to him?” You asked, your vice cutting as your gaze suddenly turned sharper as Peter knew what you meant and sighed deeply.

“Look, he doesn’t care” He replied, trying to divert the tension.

“How do you know?” You asked, as Peter met your stare and felt like he was staring at the fearless girl who trashed Flash’s car without remorse, suddenly feeling slightly intimidated, as if he were walking on thin ice.

“I do” He replied, knowing he couldn’t let his voice falter.

“You know him” You concluded, making it clear that it wasn’t a question, as Peter didn’t know how to reply to such a direct statement. He shrugged.

You chuckled bitterly as you looked away, as you took a deep breath, feeling slightly betrayed by how sweet and gentle he looked, and yet he worked for the paper who specialized in calling Spiderman a form of criminal. The Spiderman you always defended through MJ’s signature, since you were oddly related to the masked hero. Standing up and helping those in need because those at the top won’t do it themselves. You knew the parasocial relationship was a big stretch, but it was oddly comforting to know there were people like you. And the scale with which Spiderman did it, risking his life so selflessly. You admired that.

“Peter, so far I’ve enjoyed interacting with you, please don’t ruin it…” You sighed as you met his stare briefly, noticing the way his dark brown eyes softened with guilt.

“What are you…” He said, trying to mask his growing anxiety with an awkward chuckle.

“Spiderman has saved me a couple of times in the past, and I’m immensely grateful to the guy…I really dislike the things The Bogle has to say about him…” You replied, your voice easing as you could tell Peter didn’t feel exactly proud of The Bogle’s actions.

“I’m in a complicated position…” Peter sighed looking away, as he didn’t know what to say to make the situation better.

“Yeah. Because surviving in New York is hard, isn’t it?” You spat, as you closed your eyes and took a deep breath, knowing you were getting too worked up too fast.

“I’ve tried looking for other jobs…And I’m still in the Bogle because it’s a stable income. Well, it is stable when my editor isn’t threatening me…” He murmured.

“What?” You questioned not liking his wording. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve tried stopping giving him Spiderman pictures, because…you’ve read what he says about Spiderman, and he’s threatened me to kick me out. And I can’t give myself the luxury of not having a job, not even for a couple of days.. my tenant is ready to kick me out even if I’m five minutes late paying rent…”

You looked at him amazed as your mouth fell open and suddenly all the anger you were feeling now canalized on someone else. You hummed a scoff as you looked away and Peter looked back at you. He saw you run a hand through  your face and hair as you looked at him, your eyes now considerably softer as they met his.

“I’m sorry” You replied in a low voice. “I didn’t mean to…get mad at you… ”

“Well, I can’t blame you for getting mad at me for helping sabotage Spiderman” Peter said, snickering softly at the irony that he was Spiderman and he worked for the asshole who’s favorite hobby was to talk shit about him.

“Why don’t you try freelance?” You asked him.

“How exactly? I…” He stopped himself as he took a deep breath and looked at you. “You��re gonna think I’m pathetic, but I don’t know anyone…I suck at meeting people and maintaining friendships. And as far as I’m concerned, Freelance depends a lot on contacts…”

For Peter it was hard, impossibly hard to keep people close. For starters, he was a naturally lone wolf, however, after taking Spiderman’s identity, and after what Gwen’s father had told him, he knew it was best for everyone if he remained a lone wolf. He still carried the guilt and responsibility of Gwen’s death on his shoulders, only further proving his point that he was better left alone. But he’d be lying if he said he was fine on his one. Truth was, his life felt terribly lonely at times, and his escape was to get this mind busy either at work, or by putting on the red and blue suit. He avoided his loneliness by staying busy, but on bad days, it was hard to run away from it.

And yet, he found himself orbiting your general direction. Regardless of the nature of his feelings for you, he also longed for a friend. Someone to rely on when he felt overwhelmed. Like he’d done today. He felt fed up with Jameson’s bullshit and found himself going to your workplace. To see you, to talk to you, to get his mind off his burdens a bit. And even talking about how unhappy he was in The Bogle felt awfully relieving.

“Let me help you. I know a thing or two about freelance…” You said, immediately regretting your words, as you  knew you couldn’t teach him what you knew without giving away you were MJ.

“What?” Peter’s gaze changed as you broke him apart from  his thought train and took a 180° change on his look, now gazing at you curiously.

“My cousin is getting married in a couple of months, I’m gonna ask her if she has a photographer yet…” You said. “How does that sound?”

“Really?” He coughed. “I-I…don’t have a lot of fancy equipment…”

“One of my roommates took a class on photography in college and he has some equipment he had to buy. I don’t think he’s gonna mind if we borrow them for an afternoon…” You said, shrugging, as you knew Miles wouldn’t really mind in the first place, plus he was going as your plus one for the wedding.

“I…Sure…Please!” He chuckled, getting weirdly excited as his new found happiness somehow permeated to you and you looked away, feeling suddenly too shy to look at him.

“Okay…are you free on Thursday? After 5?” You asked him as the voice at the back of your head started panicking as you had a few days to think how the hell were you going to solve this. You needed a plan to fix this without having to involve your little secret. And soon, an idea sparked in your head. You were going to need Aaron Davis’ help.

~~~~~~~~

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