#pandorakinnie

[pidgeonishome]

I think we need to stop making our favorite characters so cool- I love Sirius in tats and leather jackets and cool, sarcastic Remus- but one of them spent 12 years in a prison that eats your soul/happiness and more than that in a really abusive home and the other turns into a literal creature every month!!

Maybe I’ve spent too long on foursaints’ blog (I have) but, in my head, there’s no way they come out of that without being a little twitchy. Where are the fics where Sirius talks to himself out of habit from all the time he spent locked up alone (both in his childhood and Azkaban) and Remus randomly goes off into space in the middle of conversations.

Hell, have some fun with it: maybe Sirius talks shit about people to himself whenever he’s annoyed and they’re too freaked out by it to call him on it and sort of just sit there let it happen (eventually Sirius catches on to this and starts doing it on purpose). Let Remus zoom back into a conversation and go “Sorry, was just thinking about whether snakes can get arthritis”

Let them freak people out!!!

And why stop there? For how dreamy we say Pandora is, why isn’t she a maladaptive daydreamer? She would love living in a world of her creation where literally anything is possible. Give me Peter who makes weird jokes that people don’t get because the only friend he had growing up was James who already knew all his inside jokes and thought process, give me James who cries all the time and tells people EXACTLY what he thinks (not just the nice version) because he was always raised to be honest and no one ever made him feel bad for being himself

Let them be weird- sure the marauders were popular at some point but it’s definitely not like the whole school would’ve revered a bunch of 11 year-olds, maybe they were weird at first and then they grew up as they got used to other people. Maybe they were popular because they were a little weird, I mean, no one got famous being exactly like everyone else. They were pranksters? Well, madness and genius go hand-in-hand

More on this later because I won’t stop until everyone is as awkward as I am

[pidgeonishome]

I have decided to simply go crazy, if people think I’m weird anyway then I’ll just act weird

Gone are the days of counting your breaths so you don’t seem like a heavy breather to anyone in the vicinity. Bring a whole watermelon to school for breakfast and eat it straight out of the skin with a spoon.

WHO IS WITH ME?

[pidgeonishome]

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE LET ME TALK ABOUT HOW MISTREATED WILL AND AND EL WERE

PLEASE

[pidgeonishome]

Remus is alone but he isn’t lonely- he’s an INFJ and as an only child werewolf I think he spent A LOT of time just in his own world, especially since he’s such a reader.

Wherever he’s bored or can’t focus on lessons or isn’t enjoying a conversation he’ll just go into an imaginary world and make up random shit like what if he was an author traveling the world to research for a fantasy novel he’s writing and his favorite singer is his editor.

I feel like he’d connect to the world and characters that he’s a lot more in control of over reality and get emotionally attached to it.

Like one day he skips class on his own and the other marauders ask why and he has to avoid them because he’s too embarrassed to admit that his imaginary friend got into a fight over one of the plot lines of their imaginary books and he felt too bummed about it go class.

He’d be nit-picky about all the things in his stories making sense so he’d research things about monsters he fights/potions he makes/places he visits in these hypotheticals and that’s why he’s so smart and bookworm-y.

People would catch him going off into space and when he’s drunk at parties or high in the greenhouses, when he isn’t as aware of himself and he’ll start mouthing the words he’s imagining himself/other characters saying or pulling faces in reaction to whatever he’s picturing and that’s how he gets the nickname “Loony Lupin”.

He thinks he’s alone in this habit until he notices Pandora pacing in the greenhouses (as he was about to go do) and they make fast friends talking about their own imaginary stories and ideas to each other, but not interacting at school or outside when they talk about each other on this topic and recommend books to each other that remind them of it.

[pidgeonishome]

No doubt, Remus’ knees pop EVERY TIME he stands up.

He doesn’t even have to stretch- the moment he moves his weight onto those old man legs it’s like somebody just made a bowl of rice crispies

*snap crackle pop*

[pidgeonishome]

Seeing so many people get so much shit just for being embarrassing- the way people will COME DOWN on everything somebody does just because whatever they do or say or make isn’t the hottest thing since Sabrina Carpenter.

If you don’t like something just ignore it!! Let people be cringe, because someone else will probably like it and having a go at someone for being different is as bad as all the bullying these same people got at school! It’s just stupid.

Jojo Siwa was mocked for months because she made a song people didn’t like??? She wanted try something different to the bow and rainbow brand that has been following her since she adopted it as a child and now she gets only hate in the comments of every post she makes.

Dylan Mulvaney was always considered so cool and iconic until she made Days of Girlhood and literally everyone hated her for it.

You don’t have to like everyone’s stuff but the queer community is meant to make everyone feel included and supported, not mock and exclude anyone who doesn’t fit the brand

[pidgeonishome]

Thinking about writing a script this summer- I’ve done one or two in the past with my girlfriend, but we broke and aren’t talking very much so I’m going to try doing one alone.

I’m so used to sharing everything I write with them so that we know where the other is that, so I might post it all here instead because I just wanna talk abt them 🥲

Anyway, it’s sort of coming-of-age type movie about 7 people who runaway together from different places for different reasons (some of the join the group by coincidence/accident but most of them agreed and working together through an online group chat). The story is split into 2 acts: where they are introduced and plan their escape and where they deal with life as runaways. I think most of the focus of the stories if about relationships (platonic, romantic, familial, etc) and the impacts our environments have on us, mostly because I love focusing on that when I write D&D characters and there are just a lot of different environments and relationships between the characters

Here’s the picrews I made of the characters and Pinterest people I think look as similar to my picture of them as possible

I’ll probably start posting rants about each character as I start writing more details about them and why they choose to leave

[pidgeonishome]

Ladies, gents and others: Tonya Ahlström!!

Role: The sun/the ex-lover

Ideals: To love, to be loved, to see the world, to learn as much as she can

Pronouns: She/her

Ethnicity: Canadian-Norwegian

MBTI: ENFP

Alignment: Neutral good

Personality: Kind, curious, explorative, romantic, wear her heart on her sleeve, sensitive, trusting, naive, brave (or maybe stupid, who knows)

Her playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2D5nWRpL9bmSqrsbjlIWYd?si=9WHgl3ZYTO-B2cpyuSLxwg&pi=e-RlqFBPARRkmG (based on her vibes and personality, not music taste)

Tonya is my favorite disaster lesbian, she’s the type of gay to move in on the first date, get dumped on the second and then take a year to get over her ex

She skipped town with her runaway ex-boyfriend turned best friend (Lucas Bennet) after getting outed in a really fucked up, embarrassing accident (ouch).

You know that quote that’s like “If Nana was a boy, she’d be the love of my life” that but it’s a twink and a lesbian- they are platonic soulmates.

[pidgeonishome]

Missy (the oc from my previous post about a script I’m trying to write) is autistic and nonbinary and REALLY codependent on their best friend Flora-Maya.

They grew up together being the first people to show each other genuine kindness and sort of contrasting each other’s lives (Flora-Maya spent a long time in a home that was very critical of everything she did and Artemis was raised in a very tough love, academic-focused and touch-ambivalent family) so I think Artemis views Flora-Maya as sort of the only person on their team as well as someone more important than everyone else/more deserving of love.

Artemis is isolated from everyone else and I think isn’t used to being around people who haven’t grown up with her. She’s very weird and bad with words, so she’ll often say things that don’t make sense (using incomplete sentences, abandoning context and using acronyms they completely made up).

They also are very unaffected by any judgement/mockery/bullying they may face at school due to the all the criticism she receives at home, so I don’t think that Missy ever abandoned the weird habits that a lot of kids drop after some teasing. They move weirdly, sometimes dancing for no reason, randomly stretching/wiggling their arms and legs and pull random faces just like in the middle of conversations.

They’re not used to boundaries (because they have none with Flora-Maya or their younger brother once he comes along later on) and often will just touch if they want to touch or take is she wants to take, without really thinking about it or asking for permission or providing any warning.

(It improves as they get to know other after running away, though, so it doesn’t become a really big concern)

Hahaha if I can be weird then so will every oc and fanon character I can get my hands on. Missy is a weirdo, Flora-Maya is a weirdo, Deidre is a weirdo, Tonya is weirdo- just try and stop me

[pidgeonishome]

This is Artemis Knight or “Missy” from my script!!

Pronouns: They/she

Ethnicity: Greek-British

Alignment: Chaotic neutral

Her playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6xdp6HGH0zjmmLc2DzhluA?si=ft-woquiS_S6uY-FX13Sug&pi=e-vG5atQhLRGuz (inspired by her experience and personality NOT their music taste)

Personality: Chilled, nihilistic, obsessed, very introverted and protective, avoids sleep like the plague

They run away with their best friend and foster sister Flora-Maya (long weird name, ik but there’s a reason for it).

They’re abnormally close to the point where it’s kind of codependent and possessive but they get healthier as they try and survive with people outside of each other and live together in a safer environment.

I love Missy so much istg

[pidgeonishome]

Someone needs to tell me if it’s real or if I’m searching for something that doesn’t exist because it’s making me sick with want and desperation and I have to know why I don’t have it

I keep on reading and hearing and hoping for this kind of friendship where you love and trust your best friend with everything, and they just understand you and I need to know if that’s something we all just hope for or is it real because I thought you guys were serious and I looked and I tried really fucking hard and it’s not anywhere

Is it me? Am I someone who just doesn’t like other people? Do people just not like me? Is this an actual thing?

It’s fine that I’m not like other people, it’s fine that I can’t even walk like them- I just need one person who I genuinely enjoy spending extended hours periods of time with who won’t disappear

Can just anyone let me know if they’ve ever felt the way Sirius and James or Dorcas and Reg or Jude and Noah (I’ll give you the sun) or Jeremy, Sebby and Mira (fans of the impossible life) have felt because I’m not even sure if what I’m looking for exists

I thought I felt it for a minute but it must’ve just been in my head because I don’t think they care, they’ll disappear on me for months on end and I don’t have the balls to ask them why or if I’m the only one they leave in the dust (and I would if they were someone I could just be myself with)

I have never felt fully comfortable or understood by anyone. I’ve never been completely happy just because I was near another person.

I keep on having these daydreams about people I would die for who I tell everything but there’s not a single person on this earth that I could give up my life for- I’ve been to so many different places as so many different people (and on occasion myself, just to see if that would work) and no one anywhere cares. I move on and neither of us care or even really miss each other.

please tell me (pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease) what I have to do because I would do anything to have just one person I trust- it can be anyone- I’ve never been picky or judgy about people, they don’t have to like anything I like I just don’t want to be afraid of liking it around them

[pidgeonishome]

Moving schools in September and I have decided I’m going to spend the summer making the shift from Strange (Please Don’t Look At Me) to Strange (What Are You Gonna Do About It? It’s Sexy) but idk if I have the audacity

[pidgeonishome]

Flora-Maya (An oc from a script I’m writing) was written as an idealized version of myself (at least at the start). The story follows the perspective of half of the runaways but leaves some out for the purpose of letting the reader learn things about some of the characters the way we do in real life rather than understanding every character the way they view themselves. Flora-Maya is one of the characters we get to know through Missy (and another character)’s perspective rather than through herself.

Missy has always idolized FA as a strong weathered veteran to seam so unaffected by any difficulties she faced and a prodigy in the way she excels in everything they failed at. As the story progresses, and the pair begin to get in touch with other people, FA finally finds herself in a space where she’s comfortable enough to react to everything she’s dealt with and Missy is forced to face and cope with the fact that for their entire friendship/childhoods she and Flora-Maya have known each other inside out but not understood each other.

Flora-Maya faced a lot of change growing up- her parents died when she was only 3, her grandmother took over only to die 2 years later and she experienced 2 moves with her first and second foster families before she came to settle in with the Knights. Because of this, she’s very versatile and flexible but resistant to forming close bonds to anyone except Missy. To cope with a lot of the loneliness and boredom that came with these traits, Flora-Maya created large, elaborate, detailed daydreams to distract herself. She had an imaginary friend she took from her favourite book who would follow her everywhere and do the things she didn’t want to do (like chores) and speak up when she didn’t want to. When she meets Missy at 6, the daydreaming continues, but her imaginary friend is replaced by her first real one who behaves similarly to the person she made up and always listened to the stories she made up when she was bored.

Aside from being a maladaptive daydreamer, Flora-Maya is also very nihilistic. Because of the many changes in her life and her lack of control over them paired with her foster parents’ habit of blaming any misfortune that occurred around them on her, FA comes to the conclusion that very little changes regardless of what you do. This view rubs off on Missy a lot later on in their childhood and the pair of them very differently. FA grows a lack of regard for worry and judgement, she becomes a very spontaneous and inconsequential person, doing whatever she likes so long as it doesn’t harm anyone.

Resultantly, while FA is a lot more aware of social cues and expectations than Missy, she often disregards them. For example, Flora-Maya often had a disinterest in doing what she was supposed to in lessons, often bringing activities (like books and knitting equipment) to school to complete during lessons she considered irrelevant/unimportant and wasn’t afraid to do things that were abnormal like randomly sitting on the floor in public if her legs got tired. She wore brightly coloured clothes that may not look good together if they felt particularly comfortable or she was fond of them.

From Missy’s perspective of her this might come off a bit manic pixie dream girl-esque but I promise she’s a lot more complex than that and has a number of reasons for every choice she makes throughout the script- I love her so much and she’s so complex and precious and strong

[pidgeonishome]

This is Flora-Maya Smith!!

Ideals: To protect and love Artemis, to try new things, to have fun, to live a full life

Pronouns: She/her

Ethnicity: Ghanaian-British

MBTI: INFP

Alignment: Chaotic good

Star sign:

Personality: Kind, nihilistic, optimistic, enthusiastic, loves beauty, daydreamer, poor attention, romanticises things a lot

Her playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2o5uT64z6mfq7vcC36VTRX?si=1-q0RR0kRsqVa9M2nOnp_A&pi=e-Lc6Oa7_0RJyj

She grew up in Wales with Artemis Knight for most of her life and runs away with her when they’re both 16