#penelope's shitposts

[victorian-nymph]

Something something a story in four parts

[nerointhecorner]

women want me for my deceitful nature and fine thighs

[venator-signum]

hi yes if ruereguard are the patrochilles parallel then percabeth are the Odysseus and Penelope parallel BUT (and I cannot stress this enough) annabeth is Odysseus

here's why:

Odysseus is a character who is the epitome of hubris. he's the smartest person in every room he walks into, he was the main strategist for the entire Greek army, everyone was looking to him for guidance and approval. he's Athena's champion (and pet liar) but eventually loses favour with her because pride comes before the fall. the overarching story of the odyssey is that he's trying to go home to his wife and will do whatever it takes with his cunning and wits to get there over the course of 10 years.

sounds awfully familiar to Annabeth Chase, favoured daughter of Athena, general and main strategist of CHB, smartest person in the room, prideful, strong and the person everyone looks to for approval. Athena holds annabeth in high regards but will put her aside the moment she "embarrasses her". and not only did Annabeth spend months trying to get Percy back, but its approx. 10 years from her arrival at CHB and the end of HoO, in which her overarching goal is to create something permanent - and she achieves that, though changed in unimaginable ways.

Percy and Penelope may be a bit of a stretch until you look at the main thing the two of them have in common - their unending and unconditional loyalty. Penelope sat and weaved day in and day out for maybe 20 years as men ate her out of house and home, because she would not abandon her husband and the hope that he would return home. by all accounts, it could have been easier for her to simply accept whatever offer suited her most as queen of Ithaca but she didn't. and we know that loyalty is our boy Percy's fatal flaw, and that one of the only things he could remember was annabeth.

[yellowballoon64]

*sign

[possessable]

ah yes penelope, her husband, and his ten foot tall tutelary goddess of wisdom

[hiyyihrts]

[brokentrafficknight]

They're one off from beating Mama Arc's record now!

Introducing Perrault Rose-Arc (the blond boy with red highlights by Ruby), named after Charles Perrault. The oldest child, firstborn son and the only child who didn't want to be a huntsman. The love of the neighborhood moms, he's the only Rose-Arc attending a normal college.

Summer Arc-Rose (dirty blonde to the farthest left), based on @evenmorefatallyobsessed's OC

and to the farthest right is the youngest son, Charles Rose-Arc, also named after Charles Perrault. With the same wide eyed want for a romantic life as his mom and the desire to live up his parent's legacies like his dad, he's going to end up the second student with an early enrollment in Beacon's history.

[eloise175]

Callisto when Penelope rejected him in the greenhouse and life was not all so kiss kiss fall in love get married like he manifested

angy hamster Callisto because he could in fact not wife Penelope up just like that (next time he tries to get her to wife him up, trophy husband Callisto is true and he can hurt you)

[penelope-kat]

Really upset that this wonderful show was cut short before reaching its natural conclusion. To cope I made this shitpost based off of this iconic meme (sorry):

That first episode is everything to me. Thank you G&MM for a lovely viewing experience.

[perciver4ever]

Penelope: Life or bath for dry owl?

Percy (who is the owl) : LIFE!

Everyone else: BATH!

Penelope: Bath it is

Percy:

(This was funnier in my head)

[swiftyswithin]

carry on but fruit names??

so a while back, me and @mentallyillraincloud (mostly him) made up a nickname for Penelope, "Pineapple Blueberry"

So today, we went through all the characters we could think of and fruit name them.

so here we go: Simon - Sour Cherry Salmonberry Baz - Tropicana Blackberry Grape-Peach Penny - Pineapple Blueberry Agatha - Apple Watermelon Shepard - Starfruit Lemon Ebb - elderberry Pomegranate the Mage - Mandrin Orange OR Dewberry Cantaloupe Malcolm - Mangosteen Grape Daphne - Dekopong Grape Mordelia - Marionberry Grape Petra - Plum grape Sophie - Sarviberry Grape Swithin - Sugar apple Grape Fiona - Fig Peach Natasha - Nannyberry Grape Peach Lucy - Lucuma Salak Fruit Lady Salisbury - Lady raspberry Salak fruit Jamie - Jas apple salak fruit Dev - Durian Peach (or Grape) Niall - Natal Plum Kiwi

Now obviously, these were just for the silly, and I missed quite a few people lamb, Braden, Smith Richards, the list goes on!

My favorite part of this is that i did relation last names for all except Simon, Because what i did with Simon is i did Snow, and not Salisbury.

Anyway, enjoy the fruity names!!

[victorian-nymph]

Saw someone in a tiktok comment section saying they got their sexual awakening from Kurt Russell in The Thing (1982) which is absolutely hysterical to imagine trying to watch THE THING for the first time and then all of a sudden your brain starts doing this:

Relatable ngl I do this when I watch the thing

[0ffbeatt]

I'm about to go full Anthony and challenge Debling to a duel to defend Penelope's honour for that handplacment I swear

[rabidwordjumbles]

Spencer Reid and Penelope Garcia is peak he/they & she/it solidarity

[just-your-local-cryptid]

Criminal minds, the X files and Hannibal don’t take place in the same universe but I’d think it be really funny if they did.

[possessable]

@shrewful Extremely Good Request