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libidomechanica · 6 months ago

Text

Untitled (“You get about vs safe,”)

A sonnet sequence

Stanza I

You get about vs safe, and wonder mountain round here a partial king and to be such poysonous flies from with eyes that temple the evening hastily. Whose his desires, and make worms thine, I should stay’d still to thy wrong hole, and what should frown’st thou dost thou art a scholar, Lycius! Dashing so: when the love. You see,—with shadows on the woods the Nereids fair or forbid! Contract for Germans wealth you and the soul, their way down to find him did that seeth from them down on Danaë in a string breathe outside sweet joy but in the relic, and lips! Ich am forst such a fixèd fancy. My essence?

Stanza II

You years till each played above the true as much good cheerless main to wand’ring souls for your meet cometh not a song a little child holds a forbid the curb, you snare me, doth the blue, and her ear, that Chance her—which you can’t a pard, eyed like Ariadne’s tiar: her Arethusian straight laughs, and forever! The Rust Belt. With the skies, made it all, haunters of the Eleusinian cave—such pierless matter whose steaming the garded nymph is fled,—where none you press’d of hideous torments haue harts for tongue thy worth, that is false Art was give them to sweep of lute- string of pictures than to prune, the embrace.

Stanza III

Eating, there vnseene, while your Mistress. And alluring proofe of mine owne fate I do appeach to the vestal, Heav’n ye will bee. I saw the green winds woke them back the sodger ance I gave features who taught the raines of her fray or fresh each other job and naught with Heydeguyes, and vainer ties by the soul! Tell me why the queen attends. As puff of grass was iudge apple, Woman filled in the alarmed head a-dangle by these worth, those fair planets distilled dahlias and Beautiful eyes; a lovely eyes scintillating, but, in pride flash, and oh, her warlike brother: Hugely, he return’d from the moon.

Stanza IV

—As the riddle, thou snape me of the elected on them let it seem so well hast too grossly dyed. I dream, grown meek—the sallow bend; nor grew in sun hotter that old man on the spheres, and weep in this, who’s alway, after hard times it matter on Seventh Avenue might’s gay feast ambitious lightly slake the roof, the same thy sails, and fly that’s too of song. Strikes without love alters which dog bites, whose passing wilt thought, there seen hand thought wind and foremost, if you my practice may no more fat, by being crammed, to show, they flash upon my thou freely shall move here thou born on earth waste not pine.

Stanza V

I pray you there, must have to the come to paint or in gently sorry season is the evening-star, alike, even content t’ expressed, even in secret bed: in vain. As a bum on the man; and, which we seek it; this senses? Within your joys, streams of God acceptation came than she was a star in weird syrops, that’s that violet know no deare, of wot not withered weeds and good-bye: no light, her head of shepheards hart still weeps, the sweetned so close; by those room is turned to me. But time, many planet, thou make a tried to sea. Joined the final twist; blaze up, and soon wild rose-briar, friends.

Stanza VI

A-painting somehow, and of that doth sturre. The ground, when the wall, over and holden scorn think’st those smoothly the shallow bend; I said: I never meeting, but, for a dreamy housewife runs to itself to singe, two bits of praised loud till the eight he had beauteous frame, her virgin’s blossoms blown. Where not spent of yourself: you do so. Still and walked in amorous language of translate; and only passe like needful at then to blend; and life’s great elixir to see; but false Art what art is said my country open halfway throughout his floor of thine eyes, and speech that rendered on the cup was free!

Stanza VII

And of grass or not her waist, or dew-like a city, with us, somewhere Rigours exile lockes vp al my smart, and hates remoue. His desire, that ere by my long it to me but steals into relation; or Paradise, forgetfulness of the monks close, drove to each words, now to blame, where rivulets dance wi’ scorning race, or ten time, before, but as I! Every private me why the Rust Belt. And am I in its objects find abundantly any spark of painting air and the celestial heats which alteration, as ony brat o’ wedlock. If given the churchyard tree.

Stanza VIII

That can ail theefe! Dost thatch upon he begat: they vanitee, and sittes not stop with theeues that move wi’ as gude braid sword, you remember—a moment thee hast no dross to finish all my friend, you fast too deep, impassional and two alone? Give me leave of one. Unmixed good-bye: no lines! To make the Body and rise or kick him for One, and of tears, of fire, that proceeding, wolves no otherwise with pain. For semlokest of force and Faith shield did shows not so. It was come nae unless wilds; her populous stroue, while her round the Maiden’s face, nothing backwoods days outward party to their fate.

Stanza IX

Things when no longer than anything good. Spring, it seekst not know the springe, I more in Pluto’s garden, all because is nothing in Diana, in his present Deity life, you, in one hours all she learns the rigging down her elfin blood-shed fly, we’re rich flies before, but how so noiseless, and are we; two of us in them clash; an auld wife’s contract, and life’s tongue and swift flashing for they or mayn’t they go a tract the rosy if the doctor, says My mother Lippo’s doing mowers beyond hearse: hereat they all; who cried, But what we are of thy groves ; our pillars?

Stanza X

Yes; and his gall, my days there in for the deep as the business wife: and, lastly, let some pity of the pike and proud spirit that In no time. He cometh not all grace, like them thy rich mine, to say, all they are seven! Its deep, never saw. My will through a Naiad of their green, that pay they shot in the spoyle is the plaintiue pleasures of louers; see now, when thought up true.—Is it thatch upon a throne of yourselves, then, vngratefull, wholly hers, I’m no better twere pitty. With no more, but many flowering lay, with your face. My hopes beginning drifts as she green, above heart, I look as ye were sweet, sweets the fawn, you’ll find a soul more forbidden or forbidding her lanely night he lives and ogled, nor even at nights. I see and thought, like a wee unsought nor window’d wombs after-loss: ah, do not long as air! Upon the attic and the cruell the night and cursed their starved there unjust.

Stanza XI

Happy porpoises jump in tune thy spired and snow, nor debar’d from suddenly up, then ladies like you catch one of that violet this is me to ye, my leaping here are tired old gossip, scandal, and bodies in me do rest, nor draw and wishingly tribute pay, if thou art a crimson soule, so fraught forget you is he trees, flutter from far; draw no lightly my antiphonary’s marge, with sacred island, they fed not heart. And how the far-off sail between thrill and straight cut then grew her in London stallion-hoofed falls these just as shall never in infinity, your mother.

Stanza XII

It is his point, or ere love for to be leant on warm of this! Let me breast almighty every part; venus is honor’s law of plundered leaue the staves are pretty you can, be not stirred, and nature, but yet, alas, who’s always close to go the might know the Mower Damon, know it, and bliss from pride, and I am bound, where you, sir, fleshly eyes, we see the sky, whether men may be done, and pin’d and unsmooth behind, not to know how my rage, clenched in by mistress’ flame to bring that my scythe hills? And the write, when light up with her a towers have gone his her sweet body sent you in me?

Stanza XIII

And how the dripping cloak and speech did fly that it shall in my arms; but i should, like a virgins of the warm; a pattern to subdue the tune. Stalking with there will flip, let my saint, withal, manner nor discredit your souls of blood from the stars that scantly gently, she singing skil with find, who ever satisfi’d within the wharves in this queen of murdring Time, blunter groweth with rich gifts at length of contact, and at once she, disdaine, of all they must have not silence to hide. Nay, we lover her their mistress! Every begin without pause, up the whole little! And every part’s dead?

Stanza XIV

You have ceas’d; whether this after midnights. Curtain if one traveller. It was you harke, that, dizzy without hope will hap some sent forth I did renounced himself than his arrow, ere thy sins enclose that two days dragging down in bliss! Yet want to say: the Shepherd’s career home-run totall surmised by great krater-cup bearing like a virgin lies! Blest will notes shift in rurall vaine: for the kind to her like hair. Love all the wars are not seemes but at the ancient lover heart, destroyed. That high: see what, in all, she claims he knew not one that caps Full of tears have him within my mother.

Stanza XV

Upon the acts retire, and sin he best of both and faire bound, and put in true pain was probably broke the Prior and the west by traduce; no observing and out the noble verse; observing and kissing moon, or durst fruits of thy celestial thing, who look’dst though is me to help but most triumph wherefore the radio and fear me! The dumb-sister, when armed, ah woe betide, the heauens for thy hive. By children’s eternity of that claims of ice, that, from Fear o God I never: our humble, low- born babe—in that shall dead weeds stolen in them revealed, behind, not the Corner-house!

Stanza XVI

In the came along witch, I say, all bowed beneath the back-yett be a-jee; syne up the blessed me! Catholic priests had chosen that it shoulders mixed good: to find; among more purple flakes, bright and very limb, in the sweeter then adieu, dear sweet comin’ to me. I see thy voyce the tenses I sing out with glance, an’ I’ll come out of naturally; but a lady in the noblest shew my tongue aspire to the sparrow channels the lasse, torments on thy morning gaped wide, and there, gallants, e’er here is best. But mark, whose officious flame when yet truly storie. Take care above nor eventide.

Stanza XVII

Is large domains unsoiled, until theefe! Pensive mood, that every wears, the Bramble bush, nor sound, to the holly’s sheen, that’s absence didst not of bliss; and archanges, surprise. And hearts! I hae naebody. Why not I be like the brushed brighter eyes to know some ways my verse adorn, till true-hearted; tho’ your paine, since she, A sodger’s wealth on hylls to either, in your joys, struck through wind was seen, the lion’s hanging so close meadows sear! I seem tame. Which you no formed to do our sport of my state I discern a woman but a masquer, and make Of Audit, lifted her hat and rubbish.

Stanza XVIII

Are Life, having. And struggling prey. Know, whilst he met her grass fell in the song to wake and his little maid would’st credit give what not? What, the breath now and in a swoon’d serpent to fear. The amorous sences, beauty’s waste, the golden seemed to move: els thou were natures law, rebell by law of Reason: thou, ungratefull, wholly unexpect chance; others are many a river, and a maiden may be done. And something elders by heart is beauty veil’d to the chilled to fetch from formed by a bower by many hand death, the warm, flush’d ivory slide, my old coin could and means intense eyes grow.

Stanza XIX

Near, which love’s City enter: the grew. Love’s alembic, and feet; that’s heart, thought to beare, while thus doth Love lives again and God-filled in the sun hotter they are a lilly on the night, and catching maid more grace, that pass. Looking barges, make them, fat and hang theefe, A theefe, will last I know. Be over and pale kingdom come. Let’s give herself! You keep it unaffronted, the burn, or Catholic priests had force of wedded love, and mower by many Graces! Thou shalt findeth not, she can evening foremost faire, and the chair, on the masks do not marvel at eight years to whom cruell thy auspicious were a panic fear, and be nothing in proceed, I though the best, thus doth sturre. Our love up her sapphire-spangled mark that thou turn to faith doth it a tear: the churchyard tree. Alas, alas, how you hurt you. And some ways on the gray-eyed morn about the moulder as she will’d, for a pint-sized journey.

Stanza XX

Here to important that sweetnesse he for complete, wi’ as gude will, or ere long-lived and I remained the Germans wealth on hylls to enclose tomb fair or foul my mind the streets and to the night I lingered once a-slumbered from the most meke, when not a winter’s hermitage; you, then you turn to thee, fury, woe, but’s scratched and destroyed. Define that I know the youthful Sun. A sweep of lute-fingers. Then the spake: when ye are puppets, Man in good in my passional and which, if in your lap, and sighing and we in our head—mine’s might not this woman’s forests had not stirred, to write, whirrs sudden starts; no jealousy. As Proserpine shall sticks, their own with myriads more at her void since Julia once I saw a cros, our souls of fame, the surprises—and God the season bland, through the convenient upper flow; my eyes trace that some by-strewings granted: there, from over London, your leaves that all?

Stanza XXI

Quick was drop his bone free. Perhaps a sorry muttered from rushes greetings that the act of light and leads it, being as thou will didst thou art, and thy wight, doe makes me sent: from over London, you’re hanged at me! Be, the crown; that Sappho last for him; nor could oppose. No coward them burn so fairies take a tent, and stitched with rays or more shall meet; myriads more, but a voyage done, and his come: love gives me many a pearly strange their cell, through bubbling voyce brink? I wish thee to get into a swooning loan; the garden of mossy tread, blushed tomb shall I weep my wo, come, come to ye, my lad.

Stanza XXII

And sigh and round to the white, encounterpane and down to find this heart, I say, though she that glistens with the dark vault above; your minds our love you by sometimes those the bricks bene without his feete are o’ercoming hair. Still fragrant with so displeasures in front on warm stove-window for yellow hair was taught; but false matter, like me, doth again. Seeking eye exposed, sharp checked, taught to brother beauty’s fields and archanges, such spies, there pops the vast idol; while. Consider, I would be amaze into Thetis’ bower. Of those power, and still weeps throughout hope I what you’d left alone?

Stanza XXIII

Made prosperous woman looking back to lord my horse, to write the snow, such from the delight loaves in New Jersey lights a hundred with a fervor born of the shrill and say it chance led me—she happy Hobbinoll, I blessed me! And blear’d by the mountaine, white, have thy fingers find no rest. In such mirrors, and right Pinto—Mendez Ferdinando— still weeps its end was wont, and, maugre both of murmurings, and I thy sported; I said hi to me. Let thee, or like I love some by-strewings to make the Peacock, and rubbish. And bite back the page, enwrapped frogs can easily the best behinde!

Stanza XXIV

It took us a loving on my thought, the convent. As grudging memory, wha did I cry, phillis the ball of ruth for the ineffable world adore? Upon a things, as light. Doth striue thy sweet pharmaceutical bottles clinking. Phillis the floods which done, thou spend, thou’rt welcoming flats. Wings there’s the from the quest. But courted: wha spied I but some wayside thence we hurried Venus’ doves, the joyless daddy’s spirit went, curtain leaf where did it end? Pink, the rivers, still vnto the grocery man calling into a swoon. She said; her beautiful indeed thou art a scholar, Lycius!

Stanza XXV

And pains inhabited here it bee that in mirrors, and his paper palace gay, and give your infrequent vision free to work on Jerome knockings that pushes us to allay, so gaze on, she is bright: her hair: the caged yellow eight years, of fifteen, felt affection came features—Lycius charioting fires of her, tho’ jokin’ ye be, the serpent, but die by its food served up in my breast with vain travail hath of Corinthian Lycius! Or an infant civilisation chosen that is the sea. Drink up that sweet; myriads more at my Muse, though you neither to face so life since?

Stanza XXVI

And I untightened fields under what would flowery angel pure air, that’s fiddling scythe I love that you wilt, as the lone could the plaint. The wile yon sun and make the lore of Further always keep the strength and so longer still we in them clash; an auld with bold an end, and oh, her neighbouring Tyran ground. But be gay let armes empty bee that best feelings that give your hat, the written Hermes the broken lie, my old comfort my disgrace, wery sounded and studies what your mother an’ mother. The cool cave on for the proportion we were falling care: o think it has words, his mine!

Stanza XXVII

Of Further and eat my wears, that thou swear! Pretty sure in mysteries; nor sound. They were witness and root, the bays, where harbrought me homely shall she knew nod to singe, two green, ended for fret. Not one hour old body as my fortune’s might knocking coy, she rose-wreathe still the wind mighty storie office.— For oh, her in Love’s veins than show of large, I constant mountain round her fray or no, for life, that wrought shall slide, my old excuse himself such as are imprest it was swell my bag with other shade of Julia took the pavement important though I see herself, while new emotions, You are lang!

Stanza XXVIII

Dreams came, what a sudden tresses and triumph yet; because, up the top appear’d Silence that faintly! When rattling backwoods days there past time for her husband. Cries taste, which that traced that matter to give the deity. Sweet for my gout, my feet. The dewy gem, frighter and smiles as shall see, and I know my lips were older and those embleme. Come thou would make me fit for thy fault in women, the user so dearest, every year. Their earnest words with yourself, when what can you, I like the dark. Loved, dropped, and nose and Daunger droue: no vertue to enioyeth, but with feather. Is in fear As Julia?

Stanza XXIX

Or let it shows of bloodless dove. And in the counts my sight I stands, and tumbling lid of Gods, and put it did sable eagles beard, spoil it with his great rings and sung in marble door and up, to be new fire domed blacken’d with unseen, she such eyes can drink out the altar elevated by a dark groves to hide.—For oh, her window flowers, stair into Reasons firme in they lock it in where but half for him no cure is never be dear to talk in a loaf, her heau’nly face of flowers fright for need, and balsamum, to make you saw their forefront bare and counts my selfenesse lay; but glory, I though the danger language strange or mayn’t they set your arms embrace and poore my should, in whose dalyings, with a friend, with Azra to the bridge, by their path, still stay; you have it out of my desire; I love of him go and white fleshly blew the dark when your eyes and have a certain would frown?

Stanza XXX

Yet, alas, before dull the lost thou were. May the world and on ever want to fetch frost, such sweetness to allay, so gone in tender favor, he heavy eyelids open’d blandishment, will pype and wiser that. The coolness invisibly, she roses gone to try the iudge applied to use the cool cave shalt see it all, it is when the deity of bronze, and, whence dreams are he; the minstrelsy: a virgins of Sweet fruit of change; intrigue with foreign filth and rising a new news but a man and straight not walk forlorn when one and o’er it many, the fair maid, thou so well thy image see.

Stanza XXXI

And showe, but seal with bold fiction, to make. To-night bring thine: the cause of bound, which do like. To portrait is large, least night the peopled ark thy prince by vnright and o’er thousand wise, and perfected. On the five knuckles and of Absence six month at length of Loue, without and dead, my five. But of my own. How lang and watch the munificent: how, everything be sure that so adorn’d to her buckle took, and brought of the which she glows; mild as a bum on the very self but my arms, encircling and white with rapine, and good-bye: no light, her feathers every sun that faints them would be heart the Ground.

Stanza XXXII

I exulted; nay, farre worse, makes this winged verses mark, whose tablets has gone to the hyghest will beauty, belied in her ear in many planet of the Sacrament, rouse us, and won his own and those two swimmers the bloom most wondrous moan. Their chereful cheriping, fann’d the should vanish ere heo on me, then hath wealth your wonder morals too far from this praises shall go, as harbinger as I in me, till, we are the sky might bring here; which, as is tholien while tears have stay, whiles ye may me bliss, that he promiseth, her sideways would have kisse, when spray biginneth to worke delyte?

Stanza XXXIII

Within this loue hath refuse the choir shall bound, dark smells, if not from Gaeta’s take you? No kings that hear lyre or unrestraint,— one looked sublime as their voice more the grave as the fretful paint our old, she sun and whispering. Front bare and gave features—Lycius! Who did the with steal away that thou nothing like mountains hand clip my willing is, the others all in the blasted silence and by the bowers be over silence ever deem me, another in Heav’n, atone forehead high; lips shalt in words where beauty too; but, like guest—thus doth fallen in her brauely euery part’s end where fair.

Stanza XXXIV

And so that, iste perfect love that matter now of death will not disguise in vain to get in the learned pulled a fulfillment of sicknesse of thee more of louers neuer thanks one could be so pale? Whiles Beauty fair; her head toward me overflowed her soiled boat come other mesh: and this hymn, and kept withered garland for ever in wedlock bonds unwreaths I wish we’ll live so near. As fat and thus our sepulchre is of the nymphs of delights a hundred the Lark should close meeting your eyes I’d knowne folke bow: of foes the sylvan scenes will the grass’s fallen to see. The without a storms confine? Our sound.

Stanza XXXV

Eye awake. Rosebud of it that the monstrous ledges them three-fold? No one should such a to-do! But a human climes, and his pride to telling. Part of that father’s Arms they could not Loves delight at a glances was darke; absence; and to those who am I? To instructor; but could run and we in us find the board me overflowed sky, seem woe, the Bramble bush, nor window veil was for at the words could, like the freak of both coverlet, all thou dost those Graces of repining; that might I do speak plaint. Thought for, baith kirk and princes to painting her breast, and hamely fare, and guide.

Stanza XXXVI

Remember. Were strong I climb, what is so proud usurper, and I doubt, I’ve got my sweet poison-flower, which dog bites, like his lyre, and so all’s saved me to the learned hand incense rare like a sickle’s complexion dwell in all beside the sun her shines she giue those waues indentures full of my thou kenn’st from the like a hurt you. The landward spring, fair shepheards ritch, and sighing anyway towards out. Made glooming women, the dripping clear, thou English murder, priuate fault in women, thought upon the birds befel, twould must spell, sweet and those busy world, how we couldn’t see ourself in singing fires.

Stanza XXXVII

By the thunderbolt did shroude in the cedar- shadows sear! Make sweetest subiects wrong, and still music-notes, found me roots of blood instructor; but, for thy father’d creatures— Lycius, look back! I tell that in hevene it is perfume like a grave here a-making thine to Church up fine while yellow the Mower Damon, know my heavy raid on Hampstead. Are diuell, the night he lives in immemorial elms, and then ceased the blue region boil’d for Love’s City enters, and at all their devotion, pays. For her Sicilian air. Desire, chiefe Pernassus be, and on the breath, the mountain bend?

Stanza XXXVIII

And seen the crown; that I can see thou art a scholar, Lycius! What pay the mill and he never mind I sit—ah, where down through fields easily the huge Colossus’ legs, and imagine then all heaven, that same year were stretched the Lily and with a kiss, to see, as witness all that look of the anchor’d; whither my despair; a third. For she, in what naturally; but thou a thousand saints of woe; my life, the Queen! I knew how first tis fit to becoming of this I see herself before herself, wilt thou to-morrow whiteness,—not lift the act of liking, and weeks shut with melancholy eyes in the fools may repent; thou know, they were in the cooling statues, friezes, columns gleamed not undo without pause, up the faire encrease the telegraph line of continents, an innocuous occupation. With my breast bo- peepe or crouching me only bend in one here is a journey.

Stanza XXXIX

To her face, of good found mine. I more times infusing her part of all the towsing a word, drowne not thy station. Trash, suck my sight drop. And the clicking course; still have some wild winds bounds: you should have cut downward, as first, and pain my should! If they most oppressed was but youngest Virgin Daughters of ecstasy expire. Then did all her throat and tak the leaf where I my head. Staid with pleasure, ere it all! That month at there a want that poem again at a glances with apparel me relic, and a maid more subtle fluid in sometimes her his coming hair. Silence thou art a crimson soul.

Stanza XL

For something in thy sighs, I like my please— having spi’de and trimly trodden traced that poor flow; my eyes, or, mind hates me, be kind at once there unlock’d to face in some fair. Thank you felt he such mirrors shout in the sea in them brought each places. What woe after all thing oh my boys dead, where thou, that his poore Slaues vniust deeme them back the pure and I hope doth shepheards, whichever weep. Ye living in earth devout, psaltering look of thy limits, and smell it, and let me love all for the prisoners released to wood, he heede; by no more, but Orpheus-like mine are, and bower o’ the blissful shore!

Stanza XLI

Only, this close; by them forget the trees. Only thee. Come down life of new-found and be sad force my hearts as swell my bark into that image see. If I drew men’s heads into wail thee, like a lilly on the colours true! Her crescent of sciential brain to unperplex bliss, that even to sea. I soone wouldst not thy sweep of lute-strings, rinds and time, your Mistress! For sinfull deed; and never twinkle in your hand Look you, Mag. Are fier of delight, on the house, thy tears, and letters! With me ere lie perdus three year were the wooing weed, until some fresco in fields and what am I in me.

Stanza XLII

He comes,—the best, the warm, impassionate fires of her fear and protection, to blame, like death? Among there, seeking the happy in bed and other neighbouring prey. Out- did that such as be carved lips! Both loss of man, whom he is blown by thy force dost thou, whom Time is at a lady elf, so languish, we changes, such a train is gall, and archanges, such pleaseth me ere long good too far that. But give you to look on the queens of Love, t’ acquit such a treat among they saw Cupids. And find abundant issueless will triumphant, unaware we; and wishing, and with thee sitting thorn!

Stanza XLIII

From thence darts Despair; a things plaintiue pleasure filled, but is the hills alone sinks down? I think to see the heard the meaning’s in this queen attends. Aye vow and wound! To heare the golden trade, to raise, nor give thee alone, and Job, I must part add one murmur, sent from sacred right! The sparke of coiled rope which flowers among their pointing-brush? Which she that is the lang! Fault in words with the sky. And I’ll sticks, there in me, lie on; my altar- foot, fresh and thus may say the bed- furniture—a dozen knot which here; but the soft murmur, sent from the farmer ploughs breathe; but in verse pair! But you do deceiver?

Stanza XLIV

Yet I was at a loss what cannot weigh, for poets roll who Greek or Latin in self-folding in my bridal night forgetful; then plenish’d, or blank to be forgiven, than mourning skil with many a pearles diuiding. All my painters, for at they were up a pair of—could be any other sportive art? Where she sings: for Stella hand to guide and prunes. Your chance to Jove, without in the should be found, and, whether mesh, and as good: to find there, upon a throne, bent my bodhisattva of nothing unforeseen—tiny bottles I make worms thine eyes to see, and he lies more the mansion.

Stanza XLV

When glided in a dulling lies. Went away. Sweet ecstasy expire. I probably left his golden raine: another. Age, repeats while giue my Rosalind, and snow, such thy voyce there if I my head. And course of her god, she can spear’d Silenus’ template and saints and broider then when I am bounds should’ve saves the map of my own sweeter this close, drove to write, and the front on its ampler flowers, and swell; only to those hers, all the carts make sweet is every weary, aweary, he whole creatures were sweet comes nearer then leave me the true. And in purposes their golden brede; made it all!

Stanza XLVI

While her sweet in the presume to thy wrong, writ now is rage; little coat; to drew. And broider thee, whether, the cup runs paradise, and triumph at Turin: Ancona was full sailes drowning race, the tale of sun burned at me. Will beneath her complexion dwell near adjoining to Corinth from Gaeta’s take a tried tuned it over the heart, I see. Whose very man! And only born of mud and impulsive; I was the rope that died slave is a journey through the dress. What a brother; no sisterhood. As in rank, the words she goes out of bound: for Nature, and light pollutions are eerie?

Stanza XLVII

Creature is nothing but vulnerable. Thou young man’s soul, by paint out what’s sometime after than hopes begot by fens. Scrawled the looks how quiet—dull fence and I doubts honor: then sweares as garments few, she seems the vats, or foxlike in the onely moated grape bunch he scaffold’s down by the empty of love’s star that; god uses us to haste, since her because, fair in hand at a broken purple passions lay, thou dost smile is the grammar, vowels a voice, such makes up bands to rob the strewn rich mine, and make me fight at all. I’m no better than stock the painted fields understand try to add life’s oblivion laid yourselves cooing weed, crush it unaffronted, though the street—why, soulful still faire bounds: you don’t get into folk—remember and put in Silenus’ sighs, I like way, to fingers are her grave as this scythe, does meditating seen what need your meeting for Italy.

Stanza XLVIII

Upon that which makes me, wean; mishanter fa’ me, if ten of more beauties more wit was blawn, the green winds howl to the better planes above here, from out the access off, and fell ere than through a descend, or sighing and Beautiful, then, vngrateful thee, my silken twisted brain and thing like a child is born so faire a vertues are only where my mouth with paine. A mere eyelids to cease to glided so vainly, and see the measure in vacant or two—would have mowed, had not be kindly badge-the dead, my feet. True beauty alone, and tunes attempers her bark, whose sons, not too grossly dyed.

Stanza XLIX

Or they, yet still: perfectly could say. In world that by these wild distant shore. But when they, but a fayre. My funny toil is no Gordian shape, and there is forc’d, the sweet new world’s story, which for this closed into Love’s City enters, fluttered round her conquest rose tiptoe without defeat, to play they don’t misreport. Since those emblems mix with their mistress’ eyes and thrift in that I were we betray’d to keepe vs wake, they did appear, and oft sex with their due place, farm, village, and past, into wail thee, knap the soul was melts with an unthriftless and within the sharp sparks, to escape? Heaven.

Stanza L

Or hang in all, she said; she said; but weake confused braine the white, I drew men’s lore so much too big to painters of a demon, be you reproach shall not so much hold, he, or like lightly dance no more rype, and in Vienna. Or if thought aymes at they calls through trust me good of sobs her his arms. There take your fatherless grate us canonized forehead husband’s shape, and art. Only a secret plack thee here your froward spring did sable eagles beares, so calme, socked it high: see what it shows souls entrance to despise, whilst her head, o why should gae mad, o whistle, an’ I’ll behold her, never kisses then destroyeth. Ride safe at an unnumbered from here and she green, had drunkard grows patter on earth? She taste our sunburned meadows sear! I pluckt, when thou no place forbear to her; for fair? But she shut bud that by thy weeding, for the churchyard lie, my sister swayed, my brother hair.

Stanza LI

Word that sounds, though the guns of the pale with rev’rence strong as they but sorrowed, who at love towards someone free wilt leave often after meet th’ embrace; I love you said what it seem dash’d by time wheresoe’er she has all. Let not to the wall a sluice with honey, drawne by a happies those red head; ere beauty with such suits to show, will be the skill die. And after all, the sea, by the summer youry Luyts and root, the same place, interpret God the nice remember youth of Ithaca, and singing hand away, all the nobler seas his waving, nor draw near and tell you tell us, now!

Stanza LII

And wishing waves do these his earnes, his strain a sudden passion of hands and panting all, her in this Irish whiskey, I with lid-lashes star-like, and those swift-footed, yet unlevelled. To those that leave thy buddhist my naked the raine: another the freely bore her seat while Hermes, by my silken twisted loveth him? The longer could e’er driven so hard, heavy raid on Hampstead. Never Last Forever. Me fight air hang the housewife rushes greeting fires: some days. I exulted; nor is it, being, strange and naught. For, not thinking ask’d her husband. I though his be error.

Stanza LIII

Whither to lay that such as before the marble doors old footsteps upon it. Moved was safe, and praise despair; a thing near, while I do ow; and there waits with the field Mars bare sweet some by-street—why, soul of doom. The questions will not leave often after the pallor than mourning gaped with the river it is an ever; quo’ she, A sodger’s prize, that’s out an unconditionly, this murder, priuate fault in women fooleries you recede through to fit for me, and walke within, now banish we never instead. I’m kent the day wears, that succeeds door; I try to kind may for, that’s forever.

Stanza LIV

The drops would tell her head being so clings mortally to the dews at every words where to get to razed on the full of you. Thou English murder in wane, faded before the best that may keep by childhood’s thickest dark the keen teeth of steel by care about, but ere every sound in hand—sought me Latin I condemned for two—saint our man on the calm of mute in her know by what desires, of Satyr from cedar shakes: her hair was transformed, the other work, the Princely revel may say that always close; by their laws, and straight not too deep, soul devoid of living larks, with many women striding to their due place, cease trying! Then go, see sometimes do scarcely can drink out the fruit, as full, or death shepherd’s care of bliss from thee thee for me them music’s cage, which dost rob my ioyes from the lake, beneath the strands enmesh your pillowes, sweet new world have your flag takes, that’s to been the swelling!

Stanza LV

But weep, that motto dress, or that the laying when the drops would humour margins, your flag in, or they drew what ancient melodie. Will you only fright I do, slouches back. Notes shines equal arming at you had stol’n from every selfe, she doth sides fingers. I stood by your small hands. And all the taller grave, be moulder whether floors, old voice by her smooth limbs. I never fall. To raise because good accommodation find a soul and let me louer? Where euen Natures cabinet, I read herself to breeding, where she health the passionate hearts held breathless songs do scarcely move! I promise to face sent for certainty is more beautiful face. Why this, forget the midst may be more in front—those fierces the grass’s falling like a ball the wish, and speech falterian. In no ignoble fires of loue, some eares you renounce … the moth-time of mine eye that died slave to take up and good-bye: no lights were dead!

Stanza LVI

For Stella, fierce darts but a kind of golden throne of that this closed eyes are exhausted, nor wilt, swift dispatch in pursue from far among the Ground. And soar above, freedom, not thou, O cruel madness of your forming autumn cometh nothing to the three are they both the Wound of thee, wretch, in the garden, taste forgiven through they call the blue sweater room, take breathless for a noble vigour discrie, which two can easily sung in my best of us in the kingdom and after his tomatoes: no other is ever the woods, before cannot be thy sake? Twas no atom drop: his name.

Stanza LVII

“Where sport, cannot her own cost not thine eyes? You do these secured at home, in them. So neighbouring her beauty and brag the day we would that whose despaire The lonely for some freakful cheriping, or holla for us all! That I were dried; she said, My grandsire left you know my lot, far-off sail between you a course; still unshent, ichoot from mine on him out d’ye say? No love you the written, her dreams of its length of the sung thine to follow. To thraldome time mis- spent pay into thilke god that none that brain and tell to this can even Sometimes were made of camp-life and the like the spring.

Stanza LVIII

Such as deserved, and time by me the wonder may the blue eyes? Will ye heavy sky over them. And they meant by traduction be ruled with eyes growth her waist, sing a faery broods drove Nymph and Breath of constant mountains mingle with the distills before a woman, men said I am very birds, and once a-slumbering and dance to becommeth her chaste away from an hind, with such as before. She flew, break from the purest ground? I like any otherwise with the farther a towers. Ah, my care above; you, to wet a window and doth sturre. All things we have gives it is a journey throat and soar above that shall we needle- like murmuring him. Brother job this works are on the world my plain, swoon’d serpent, but could not leaves, and letters, green, and aloof the presence himself was. That idle hours, there dead! Clasp one and sigh and tell how shall shall I cross the deer, but keeps catch a lark.

Stanza LIX

Within the spoyle is experience. Its end was light, doe make these just as the dead! Then scorning that I be like widow drowning in many are you lived and renew our heart with you never saw it—put the poor devil’s line, dearest, ever can hold theyr art outgoe.—In the green, two were new roses proportion we were had made my head. I made swell; only thought of nature, a spirit, without a sabre, if one day was sloping soft, lute-stringed heels to either is dark as young Cupids dart. The shrill winds but his fair creatures once so A months since, mething not one would have; choose.

Stanza LX

No matters too, and be not preacher can thy Venice-glass, sweet joy befall the man! The first ordained above the slow amenity, your flocks, but most from that all if they like two alone, she pleasure, turn’d the steaming ordures of louers. And vital feeling years, and of hideous torments haue, but in triumph in you! Yet—gentle warbling like allay, so gazed on now, your neighbour grave we profaned there’s Giotto, with your tender Lambes, than I lie on; my altars kept the air, her neck; her eye: yes; and trusty to another Lippo for a map doth the night I do speak.

Stanza LXI

Hath my blush rebuked me. He picture to roam the kingly should men in the wondrous shame; however, who by a single peering- wheel or touched, I’d grow sad. Then adieu; but, taking that stand one most, then in a circling arms empale free by us; we two being loved, as they, wither’s person, grace, that if thou about the every word from his queens of buried dust of books, scrawled the way to defence: that with lid- lashes star-like, every part’s core like Christ whose statues. Now that I do Stella, the rough she said, she hath glory, and pen record never uttered from rushed we sit on.

Stanza LXII

Stella, fierce darts but Heaven round stone, lie on thee that’s absent within, now with gnarled bark: for, doing mowers to wakening, whose smoothly pass their soul devoid of the milk-teeth from the daffodils. And the keen teeth and Master in the right; but, alas, I would restrain her for tombs afternoon, a family-likeness Union. And now my rage, clenched into chime through the speak. Love gives its breath not, she street, but in this closer or farther absent wi’ thee, i’ll send the running sound it anew revive; inspired, devoid of love to the witching dumbe eloquent inroads to the harvest’s done.

Stanza LXIII

The sparrow’s child, you step up closed in subiect wert, bold an infants are browe browe browne, hire owen make, longe the world? Is it the lower o’ the lingring near, whiles ye may never fall. As long, her lips Loues oene beheld,— the judging memory of the blisse, whose perfecit opus! That Fate prevent; and the lake, beneath my mother. And cold hill side. And her nimble wing, deflow’ring removed friends. Sweet for him did her honey to the harvest’s done. And yet things we heard side, but a man no doubt in one holding be bound better twere my trouble rent, and all his single with a passage, my dearie!

Stanza LXIV

And, whether met a lay me doth prayse or kick him swear them go forth of balm derive honey to the sun’s golden eyes, which thus he tress your present Deity life, in glade another soiled gloves that sweets of violet knots, the cometh not at a time, you, to wood, he fleeth afore fainting served up into them. The written Hermes, by my soule and that wealth or pleasant glade and better, every hour gave to this is white with someone like, both reproduce her cheek, like her eyes are he; the torrent out on evermore moves delighted ha’: the sun. Watching shame commeth her breeze a hundred the room, I hunt the air they take a tatter’d marish-mosses creast; where had made eloquence, is the sky. But I in its second fall, as a real woman lookin’ to me have watch’d temples daily fed, when thou mayst be bold war’s dead brought by greater, cleaning to be but more beside to kiss you.

Stanza LXV

I were by the shine above, much more, beare withered lonely Winter-sterued. Triumph at Turin: Ancona was fat and they please to thee to turn the salt as mine, forsake, and that shall bide at restrain, and wide, with hoary heart. And oft so closed at home! Be but feelings! It was certain if one so utterable clay, a plenteous region bids from the soul’s sleep; when this’ she said; she love to sleights are Pretty rooms; thou feel her yellows and impulse: and your meaning on of a conquest is; how your being Christ toil up and do not mine, and this quarter- florin to see, in its second time.

Stanza LXVI

Said a world of plundered from me was wakening into his, the holly’s sheep do hide things left me gowd, a maid in a cat- like what I can give? Ah, my Perilla, after man that farther an’ a’ should make these thousand say it is like the young arms, drying strangle by force, thunderbolt did throughout her winding curls about: Noli me tangere, from you, you wide door. Us walking the wealth their doors discouer where harbrough but of euery kynde to wand’ring mynde. Dead when the starry crown our past thou would injure those room for Death alone for thou loves for he nil false, thou art! Or word, drowned?

Stanza LXVII

Waking a human justice all things which, with his soul at the little else saw him, who them. Which that rose, and thy stretched we sat as love, am gain to me, and her thrown, went and swift force to fair? Through came a- pilferer. But I vnhappy am joy is,— empty left to use.—The white mouse behind: returning; I left in the world the world’s no blot of poisonous care my mind I straight steadfast rock of silky hair, on their spite thou art a Thorn, and seem to stayed so life is drear, hot, glaz’d, and a bunch he scarce could keep their heart as true! My finger’d Muses moe, soone a night with thankful hear horse!

Stanza LXVIII

It is others, and inexhausted veins, between thy bosom bred wi’ as gude will through the Peacock—raced that kisses an illusion. Define the same dreams came, and hushed, and my hope will say,— for death do, if thou snape me only five wound round that I have a philosophy, Dorothy, afterwards. The acts retir’d, and try to day, and those vices got which wrapt in letters plains again. Wulf is force. To her beauty, music-notes, found Paradise, in such thy heauy grace, wery sound of warrior came: he took us a long in postering barge, least we rest: the neyghbour panting light in the street, my heart, safe at an Eurydice; for, not this is to love your infrequent reply, seven death. Is stirring tear. I, in them thy flight flared another mesh, and wett your love of her fair brow, know by whose owne folke bow: of fortune flout, or uttered in a kind of war wherefore, I with us.

Stanza LXIX

For Love, for the grasses of your present appeare, enter: there. Let us now my little maid? All my grief, and with you, you can drink rich gifts the twilight. Awake, forthy mither’d at dew so sweet, I read. Or the mountain to move here those vermilion: and that I shall know it, and through thou down and I am not thinke no more clear. When you tell, sweet pharmaceutical bottles I make in there if I chance to under wit, the paine. Proceed, I feel! To manage well-conducted persons. Will, and clear as witnesse, loue, in sleep ere I often swore my man, who know where, seeke a bankrout know!

Stanza LXX

Practice up—he’ll partake it; then, as they’re welcome, come, I gesse, torments and probably good too so bright, beauty as young and well. From the clouds, to escape then his counter groweth. I protections, like the long-lived and I woke the mountainted signals, even when they are dry: oh! While I debated what deity oft with your souls entrance though Fancy’s casket were. Like a makeless snake, bright she left in force. And incense shadows I have locked in a swooning lowe in our herte up-casteth the found a third. Lava ravish’d days old. Come, the swan, and looks the couch’s persons. It is not so.

Stanza LXXI

What even to dust. To changes, such please to kill, and we sit on forlorn, than you, after that I in mysteries; nor shall never quit you: zooks, what’s all ruby wine, and moon in purpose was waxin’ weary wanton toyes, my wit, till stay; you go that serener palm was iudge between us, and best of the river’s life is dreary, like guessed woods, to escap’d from Pyrrha’s pebbles o’er who go to them. He bids me at an unnumbered there waits will guaranteed to try the prison-house and fruit unseen unto the more than was somethinks, it sees the elm-tops down? I met a lambent-flame place, cease to the Nereids fair fallen in the most oppresse; vngrateful theefe! A faery’s child of longing; but faces, sweet breath, with my grief my eyes, least sea deriu’d, to desires he be, for lovers daily proues to endure its thirst ordained appetite; like lame glimmers in the sea.

Stanza LXXII

You find no rest, love the midst may be moued toward Lambkins best. Nor brere, nor gastly owles doe fleeth and robed in the soul! Thy shepherds as then nothing shame, and find any sea-shell the sweetness to pain. Fro the lythe Caducean charming hosts are gone in the demand then though to fill or mend the world makes vs languish, we changing some couenants make. Meanwhile she had them closets too, for rage now appear, and most oppress’d him dropt her new voices. And not, after foot was nothing but little the shrike, and lantern— for that they are impressive here! Of Satyrs knelt; at whose office to heares.

Stanza LXXIII

Here always, as the common mother. Melted down through false Art was cutting a world, the sparke of coiled gloves then I knew that which probes flaunted on the sweets distilled dahlias and good too far that she said: went away. A mere long, long good. Of doubts honour, that give me. Been dance was a strangers either to-day world—the best! But marked here for those ciuil wars to breathe upright at all she felt the flame place, cease thy Will, ’ if thou know. Moved with all over and unfather two, I listened next time, your small! Phillis the song of man, and call hear then my sprite; these thing to the pious people of May, they take.

Stanza LXXIV

With Death the best, there my selfe a ball of my hands mighty ever-presence not within who love’s stay, said Lamia trembling wainscot shriek if a man, which is world—the beauty go with scenes will not be bold war’s dead, my brother an’ merit do I in no ignoble thoughts of rising and then yet thou to-morrow take you? The night he lives away by the little beyond thy limits, and gold they are convent. Death and Averil, when a morning-star, alike, both reproach the blasted her left in furrow- cloven falls he fared, your head. And crush of mine. With this abundantly any shown.

Stanza LXXV

No joy is,—empty word to me, until I find out a song for years, of fifteen, felt an infant ripe for the business, and cream enclareted; and hereupon he bade him those Graces, which on the waves in trouble sacrifice to witchcraft is so proud spirits need to us: and hushed its breathing is my mistake, my old body turned to bed and blissful gently. And who would be heard them and come there alone for truth, O Loue, with my absent wi’ the churchyard tree, and pale club of lightly slake that end is almost entirely but let not saue, murder in Love’s Elysium.

Stanza LXXVI

Who list to lead and lawyers find was they this abundantly detestable. I probably took you years, through bubbles o’er; and there, I am blind inters, and wound! So that, wholly hers, from home to move something in the marke, that that died slave touching fame, that sea deriu’d, to justice and reserve the Lily and radiant culmination, e’er driven so hard, as when, sleep; when the quaystones will report. I will give me wolle to pass unseen hand its features could, in tears have you at you use their hinges, such as their color, visibly, she hates thine, free as the blooms but of monk, the bloom!

Stanza LXXVII

And life’s companion art, ioying with oaths, dere wont to show! Could not lookst babies haue: a right! Strung heart’s conquerers with a kiss—thus delay’d his feature doth these words away longer glad, I send the way that be now posting the bright for years ago. After hissings in fear, and soft palm—Not so great master! Since the kids had desire my many a pearly life, you, or in madness of your poem bores me, alas, whose luminous pine; or let her sway, faining violence and plaints, causd of dressing soft, lute-fingers find; and loves the skies, made it with t. To beare of each bird’s care about.

Stanza LXXVIII

If ten of seventy-three I lay they all; who comes in the wild hills. While on land the daisies grow.—Ah, where euen while verse; but faces, will wring us at least we get our meant by thy fond, plight, the vast abyss: what am I flattered seem so. Sisters not so. Tho’ father’d at dew so sweetness love. And burn your sound, i, in there I will stop it, for Love head turning on of ages have gone to sleep ere I sit and such as desert sand is alive; inspired, or stand, or blank to be Natures are Pretty, to say, oh! Then your kiss Three years as nicely bred by green. By atoms with him?

Stanza LXXIX

From here alone, and two orange, two green, lie on thy mamie, shall I awake, for thy naked polish, liquid fine, ran the scenes of it was thine on forlorn, till, we then a bud but as formed to do they go a tract for us all! Its summer, ere it smote, still bless ocean with me the raines of love you my practised into relation I think’st thou, ungrateful, hast said a word! Are the body’s grant zone; she look from Cenchreas, from its need of weale, like a child … that Lycius, so instigate to confess their earnest look upon myself into the rain with borrowed. Laughing year!

Stanza LXXX

Whose armes those talons held craving, young Jove willing thee alone every hours; the close my nymph is fled,—where be forehead sitteth. Think of it was infused; since you so fairily by the five wound was low, as made, and so tangled marriage ring of man, so sweetest stone; the snake is gold must do: for all misplaced, she dress, or dusky color, visible echo, and glory to and sing out roads to proofs and clasping shades of rivulets hurry of Christians to import forgot am of being the Rust Belt. On Seventh Avenue might he hated nails fellow, mark’d the wet leaue to loue!

Stanza LXXXI

Say; mend yet mostly my beauty a-wee; but scorching shepherds pipe retir’d, and wide, and pain I feele as much syrup ran at was cutting air, sharply storms, whose Echo made so fair? We, whose swift motion of Dracula my faith, ye’re not pine. Your questioning, proues than every dreary, like a sea of midnights. Love is lights in shades. And in the shower, forget it that such as before me a blank; it meant by thing and wait thy will go deep, impassion gave thy wrist, us canonized her own humble, low-born thinking about you shaken; it is, you don’t remember he’s much as there!

Stanza LXXXII

And tempting powers be over youth; and loveliest to thee afar behind, not thou smooth-lipp’d wither’s shady bright! Eyes lookin’ to me, yet is ere wild with her apron o’er vales await till guaranteed to our court the street—why, soul revolves, thy voice, your wofull Maisters which dwells in steady surprise. Nor draw no more, it did that pay there, that kiss; dead weed, until life’s green, above; for panting the Rose, together is mute insensible it shall my green condemned to us: and what you’d left in turn, with lid-lashes star-like, where the very low and I will be merry dint, my feet.

Stanza LXXXIII

My supper boxes too, pale warbling house from day the bottom did thee: then she was a brighter eyes I was you sit and hour of dazzling hue, vermilion-spotted, golden hair it is, so much hold, he, or like Lord and sighing, which incredulous. The way, I must shepherdesse, as where’s fool, seeks, but neuer than thou doest procession from paint apace, least thou loves, were a wannish fires. Which burns the cruel hawk caught my young sparrow speare, enter brauely euery where now rules. All thing course ne’er be as braw and country from one another an’ a’ should not me? They: alas that I must spell out!

Stanza LXXXIV

Hang the Partridge—or fell upon this our sunburned to goe: the ransom of my hart made sweet hour will and soft and ev’n the cometh not all grace doth Nature’s crown, slow-stepp’d, and saints into her presence, I hope nothing mortal dreams have you, in which sweet hug, is stolne from my mother. The scoped this is sheen, the like the crown’d in single; all thing oh my bonie lady dare nothing was denied not preacher case; we cannot mind desolate, mark’d thyself and there beside to lead the skipping clear him; nor, as she shame when armed, at dull the twined, had not spent! My Nanni would be obsolete. Of you!

Stanza LXXXV

Fold now must go, what a loss what nestling limbs. It was of old friend? Thirsty, glad it haue wrought by greater room, I hunt though not kneel for the corners of all his guifts; his floors, old joys for him no cure is what will, or uttered in never twittering of loue hath most high, that Paradise, in spring? Dost the crown’d, he cried—La belle Dame sans merci hath wearied mind know my race. Use and dry down scythe of my desire, chiefe good as suddenly ground, renne after than through to say that I can’t stand there, though deface imperfect love you, tell him if her passion fleets, an innocent warmth, he break.

Stanza LXXXVI

There lie perdus three weeks shut her stept: she, disdaine recounting and that I shall see, nor grew her conquest is; how you straight when move in school except for verse pair! Go, my Flocke, as the strangled in the dark, and the clinking look as ye were pretty, to find; and enough if I but sorrowed, whom from sweet nymph, to winne renowne, a hard-set smile, lips in the lily I constantly? Where I am sad and snow and gave up her head in a dreamy house, my heart is bruised, as once again! I wish to God I never the steaming of love alive. For Nature to slander favourite’s woe, i’ll take way longer glad, I send the holly’s shee deserve more the summe summer loath to walk forlorn, than to an end, that’s fiddling scythe, the snow, speak as I in it recite. And of gratefully quivering her breast almighty storie of dazzling hosts are eerie; and, so the Rose shadow sway.

Stanza LXXXVII

And oft saw the deck, perhaps thrown, when I’m crying. Hands ta’en away; his arrow, and sweet, if in your eyes were a panting there is cravings forth of living lay it is me sent, etc. He cometh behaviour. For pitty. I have something to me: this best to the day was of our sunburned for the world of poesie were unlock’d to flie; I restless verdure, turn’d—syllabling light, want a great company! Is gone back- stile, and winter hard and universes cease the truth! And we’ll building souls for all thou do they went. Showing to waken doubt, as full of good dog grieued, but light of one.

Stanza LXXXVIII

Thy brow, and heard the might cut to catch one of the best bed, tho’ father wiping her love, and bars, eclips’d her men may use deceit: he always slide.—Tiny bottles I make folkes, he or she, in the bribed cheek a dye of what sweet, and paint a sweet some by- street, but is not at all how I measure, onely Winter of your song in self- will’d, her dreams, as the other before: but ryper age such trembler in that eyes that at the next Friday! With Phoebus streets and undefile. Suffer in the days she breeze of a habit—blows eight years to blame, within, now glitters plains and dig deep quest.

Stanza LXXXIX

On which burns the deer, but yet, alas, how God fostering bark, whose word for some brings forth to say! Seek it; this beauty’s angel- brood, lilies of Love is but loue as lyfe I wayd, tho’ father throws up his single;— why not of.—She would have so ease me: for Death nor atom that I loue that test. It is brief hours, that in her chaste a fable words. I’ll be knows, maybe the motionless wilds; her frail-strung heart, though oft you my old breathe; but stars that rose tiptoe with t. With shield, whilst I thy brow with nimble fancy frae my Deare: but if thou to-morrow only sail between my mother a towers.

Stanza XC

A sister Jane; in the first time next she head, o why shouldering was drop his body so ill, there in your three, forsake the twilight, beauty lies by her muse express grace, that they were to succeeds door; I try the winds too sweet and from his wreath. And thine eyes, and restrain of valiant Rebels of fair Nine, forsake the world of love; to quench the doctor to reach you don’t remember blissful gentle blasts in spread, whom she employes, dost lord my hope, turned to each obscene and live: Alas! With shouldst departing all because of blissful too; winning is only said, she is at a brother Lippo!

Stanza XCI

A third, then hate me who is that rose as long as the leant thinking; the field, when the west by the blooming wood-nymph’s strange barge, joining love to see and aloof the plain, join with emulous love; When shall o’er thy name of window veil was melted and so he return, something Was My Fault has been me get our head toward mind, his job, his job, his soul began retreating, old joys of the Prior: when you know where it feels! Be sure the fytter then a bud but as I in my yellow hair fall. Not fooles, where thy defect, commanded by the mystery of me beloved me; and, my lad.

Stanza XCII

Pale grew her crown! A sluice with a fervor born of mud and proscenium of her languid arm, delicate, put out what’s force of my Julia’s cheek, and honest sodger ne’er durst inhabit; this come to be a golden mysteries; nor shall I cross her which to speake what it shall its dark, and honour infrequent smile. Stella loue: fooles, who is agonized her for the spring did shoue: each the book fell down like an idle languishing shame, another. About at you’d left but be gay let a truth, the narrowly the telegraph line of containe, of all her yellow’s simple, fire-balls on.

Stanza XCIII

Shepherd stopped here greater, cleaning a kitchen cabinet, stella hath, where quince, I let me walked with rapine, and cold days, that they take. Not pointing aught else—it is fled, or uttered round the chameleons, courteous gift, methough his her hunt, I know my peeres: but, like allay my home? Beyond all: her Arethusian strength of Love we’ll have him company: I gazed-but lift her warlike brother Lippo’s doing all the Prior, turn him out these last, and sighing shades quench and universes cease, stop you moved was shortest view, no eye with the fulfillment, and pen record never kiss Three year.

Stanza XCIV

Where to roote of purer air sae weary. Count upon, wonders to wake and clasp one another John there his should rather, I promise of both soules, euen Natures full,—while both translate; and clown’s-all-heal, the Prior’s niece who turn the nations are rebuilt. My friends soothe my essence? What class we find no birds single sweet is when the black and snow, speak gentle English murdrer now, your fists. Let minstrels swept thy bosom bred wi’ mony a sweet days the winds we took the corner when I arrived. And by some defences. This if then else-where, which foot in the human race capture of a thousand mine.

Stanza XCV

Of Audit, lifted from his quicker elements ease me: for Death. Will pype and a smile is the vapours of course! Subtle to her he took me in a garland anxieties, and star, alike, both in birth new joy was free woman, so sweet in the staves are slight and heavenly features law, rebell to the whole soul is mine, no voices called out shame where beauty’s waste, which alters when the Nine, for mintage lie, beneath the realme of wit, to state, that to desire my leaping and true, and only said, My life inspired another to mother through to stone—something did sharp temper right!

Stanza XCVI

The nice replied, tis Apollonius sage, that shall closed what a lady in town. Since she, I am aweary, aweary, oh God, that they came, shorter, so I proceed out of euils is she within his brief hours, that at they lock it in whereof the Wound of him, with melancholy; until they are as her speech do breathed the beauteous region bore. I tell him I can scarcely move! Night I still winter come, forsaking Poetry! With comin’ to men, and thou which we may; driu’n else-where, I can thy siluer fields and she’d said, My grandsire left behind this thistle, and laid you feel’st it cold.

Stanza XCVII

Of your lap, and could not tongue thy rich flies. Rushes us off from sacred right and swift-footed Time: despite of the envious race, not this is me to a woman’s wife; the fine need I tallies the same disease, did both trusty to any, but is happy things by mortality, for me: love at length into the pious people you and bower by magic, ghost nor shame, and there to count it up. And the received in your eyes traced that you wilt, swift dispraise to see how they will give the gilded girl who’s injure the servile rout of baser subjects you harke, where Laura’s heads cut off!

Stanza XCVIII

Charlotte such by love that shall still of silky hair: but that held breathe meadows brown between my heavy eyelids to all maskes my fortune! Could Fate prevent; and thy honour, which dwell and tell me, is turned to highest but thee the crosswise, or, which from the service to breathed their devotion, glorified aright, what in mine eye can’t unlevelled. Still that when the spite the lines train is galley of Jehosaphat the smiled, and lets drop his bough, hire swire is no Gordian knot which my veins, that I cannot heart hath the priest, to instigate there to pain was not in the water; for a dreams.

Stanza XCIX

Nor blushing women beare, whose talons held craving, never saw it—put these? Since thou should gae mad, o whistling line of golden dew, twas refection times a pieces with miserable me! Never uttered in Porphyria; strain. The Maiden’s faces, and nip each vnderfong my lasse, while yon sung, with vain death, the same—if you go, heare you moved farther than man, which their though I were see the swamp for all: her lone voice kept: all sum my couch’s perfecit opus! Journey through many flower o’ the removed by my mother died as it it that ere eve’s sake, if you go to th’ most, as who should well.

Stanza C

With such sleet, an’ I’ll come to ye, my lad. God in like a tent, and say: I saw my gout, my kerchief there is when you’re not a soft feet divine in them. God in madness melts with peopled ark thy hive. Spread, who tempting plague thyself in his our client, poorest hovel to a chambers of this! She has all. Province, methough yourself: and saw I at a lost and alluring soul, their hinges creast; Mars bare. Mild as an ever effort, changing spi’de and now head in a snare me, be kindly, every-dayness off, and left behind her side of some on that golden locks, but ere by the heart, destroyed.

Stanza CI

But I forbid! Follow those red chambermaid. Its fell that best of love, and brag the holly’s shee designed, Heav’n as well again about her neglect has its life and denies,— lest inke Venus gloue, in what other head. And so all’s saved for earth and that serene, she dwelt a nymphs of brother she knew whate’er the lean, and the clamour of the shrink ashamed in the Lights of pleasant glades, where is on one saw thee such a to-do! How like a flag takes his poorer sparkles them to look as ye were dead! What done, sir, it concerns you recall and small caused. Doctor say at need. Thy flocke in women whores?

#poetry #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Markov chains #Markov chain length: 6 #161 texts #sonnet sequence

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professor-abeloved · 2 years ago

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It Loves Within (a review of goodbyes, gratitude, and gay screaming)

i read somewhere that an aspect of the horror genre is pain. and if you're a fan of the it lives anthology, pain is inevitable.

the pain of choosing who has to take jane's place, a game that (doesn't) end(s) in sacrifice, betrayal, and anguish. the pain of losing one's parents, finding family anew (in both blood and found) - only to potentially lose it all.

the pain of an impossible choice: do you end this, once and for all, to save everyone - only to never see them again when you finally return home? do you remain in this world, with gaping wounds patched by temporary bandages, for the life you've never thought you had the chance to live? or do you try try try to bridge it all together, pushing for a world full of potential, a reality still out of reach, but still worth fighting for all the same?

every ending of It Lives Within is tragic in its own way, a bittersweet balm to the trauma-filled fuckaganza of a journey of these characters we know and love.

i'm never going to stop saying thank you to everyone at the @itlivesproject team for making the choice to create and collaborate on this masterpiece. the pain of pixelberry cancelling sequels (er, trilogies) broke my heart, but this fan game is more than a dream come true.

(the rest of this is kind of a rambling review under the cut)

looking back, i'm actually glad that they cancelled it - because i wouldn't trade every second i played ILW for anything. (and my girlfriend knows i've spent numerous all-nighters just playing and/or talking about ILW <3. i tell my therapist it started with abel's first diamond scene--and okay getting side-tracked).

first off, i want to mention all the variants. the It Lives series were unique and notorious for having different branches and endings that carried through to the next book, something which isn't very common in mobile visual novels. since ILW had not one, but two books to reference... hoo boy. coding, writing, making art + sprites for, testing, editing, and hell even just thinking of the different variables and how they impact a third book is such a herculean feat and i applaud everyone on the team for all the blood, sweat, and tears poured into this endeavor.

the gameplay itself was super fun!! i think it hit the right balance of action with timed choices and puzzles (i now want my own crown paperweight), implementing that Nerve Score system that the It Lives series is known for. not only did one have to keep in mind their Nerve, but also their choices between Blood and Shadow that would seal the fate of everyone in this Pixelberry Cinematic Universe (hello, horror Julian HSSgame). it was fun as fuck, i really liked and appreciate the decision of 3 different main endings <3

because the plot was a downright banger. every twist and turn had me on the edge of my seat and frantically screenshotting everything (somehow i've gotten to 20k screenshots, but at least 98% is ILW. the other 2% are random crap and also Choices, lol). it was cool to theorize and guess correctly on some things and still be utterly shocked at the brilliant execution. i can't list every single thing that made me gasp, but the crumbs of foreshadowing are incredible. not just saying this as a tester, but the replay value is nuts. (also the different personalites of sarcastic, genuine, and aggressive are so good).

having character relationships as a core stat was also an organic, lovely choice. i adore how everyone started off at various points (joss at 0 and amalia at 75 iirc?) and could develop differently and sometimes independently of nerve (abel being easy to befriend but having tough nerve to raise because he's going through Some Shit, while jocelyn was more closed off yet had easier nerve to raise). it really colors the ways the main 4 interact with rowan, and i love how even the romance variants played a part in it. from jealousy-laden glances to the famed Union Walk Out, this game was a breath of fresh air to the usual 'i accidentally have 1 flirt point with this LI and somehow they're in love with me' vibe of current mobile VNs. (mattyass is an outlier and doesn't count <3)

speaking of characters!! holy shit they slayed and served, giving closure to our favs from the first book and then some (being pro connor green wasn't in my 2023 bingo card, but it happened! i like that funky lil dude), giving the cast of the second book vital yet natural roles, while letting the new cast shine in their own right.

the It Lives cast is vastly beloved for a reason, and the ILP Team not only nailed every single one of the canon characters, but they breathed new life into them (literally in the case of RF!noah/devon). i'm beyond words to express how amazing it was to not only have my blorbos back, but to be able to see a beautiful devonoah romance and flirt with dan pierce after years of pining and get married to andy kang?!?! the gift just keeps on giving. (i'm just biased in mentioning them because devon, noah, andy, and dan are my ILITW biasline but i'm so happy to have seen stacy, lucas, ava, lily again <3333)

i also adore the ILB crew to bits!! i had the impression they were barely gonna be featured (and valid), but the way the showed up!! the way harper was important and could kick ass while injured??? slay.

and the way everyone interacted in ch19 was some avengers assemble beautiful dream. i don't think i'll ever be that happy again in my life, fr <33

and onto the stars of the show...

it's been an honor to spend time with each and every one of the main crew. jocelyn was someone i was hyped to see, ever since her cameo in the ILB end credits scene. redemption arcs are tricky and while i admittedly felt the initial trepidation... the execution of her development blew me away. it is fantastic and realistic (getting to encourage her to be better or to leave her alone was also a cool mechanic. i love how it's in firm yet empathic encouragement that she works to better herself.). she grew into such a fierce, gruff protector with a heart of gold and fists of fury. i love her so much. her nightmare sequence facing her shadow past self is one of my favorite's. arcs of self-forgiveness vs self-flagellation hit hard, and it moves me to tears to see how far joss has come <33 her route having either a slow burn vibe or a fwb tinge was also an excellent choice !! i enjoyed fwb route (she's so sweet and considerate, putting a blanket over us with a frown lmao) and i can't want to replay for sb + to write fics with her <3

now onto lincoln, my fav mlm cowboy son. i was initially jealous because i thought my girlfriend would be into him + i thought abel and he were exes, but i came around in ch13, iirc. i connect with his arc of wanting to prove your worth to your parents very painfully, and it means a lot to see him know that others' approval will never define him. i'm also happy to see him process his pain and give others a chance - give himself a chance to apologize and let abel in again. he's also fun to torture write for in fics, and somehow he's soulmates with my most complex ILW MC, wan, despite me son-zoning him real bad, so that's just amazing characterization. excited to write more <3

amalia my beloved <33 the brains, brawn, beauty of rowan's rogue monster hunting operations. i love her and her route so much. childhood best friends to lovers always slaps (i mean, cmon thats most of the ILITW ships), and the way it was executed for amalia is chef's kiss. the angst of your best friend not being the person you thought they were was an excellent spin on the trope. but the love she has for you and the love you have for her is something all on your own?? perfection <33 also her dreams of wanting to make a difference, especially what happened with her family is a very relevant experience today, are so inspiring <3 i'm so excited to replay her route with a different mc and also to write her as well <3

AIJDBFHDFJDOK abel aifhsohifOSDHDSIGH okay that's it.

JK abel, my love, my light, my stars. professor dorklord. the reason i've changed my url after these long years. i love him and his sexy sweater vest of sin so much. my favorite scene of all time is when pretending to have a lover's spat with abel in amalia's university AISHFIOG. he's funny, sweet, and charming. i'd listen to his nerdy rambles all night long - and yes, partially an innuendo, and partially that i like nerds who ramble about things. i love how he can be too rational (yet always with a heart <3) yet also so selfless, and i love how he can choose himself and his happiness at the end instead of living with ghosts <3 i love you abel, baby, i'm coming back for youuu in every route, in every wip <3

to ro, my trans-coded, queer-coded power entity <3 i was so happy that MC had powers (not from a suit we had to spend diamonds on), and wow they executed this trope so well. rowan is so well written with 3 different personality types, it's wonderful. y'know, i used to make MCs for every choices book (until i got lazy lol) and i can't believe i have at least 4 MCs again <3 the creativity this game sparks in me i swear to the power. i'll see you soon: ronaldo, genuinely sweet and genuinely terrifying baby boy. wan, my sweet snarky selfless drag queen. amor, you tough dorky tcg-playing sweetheart. reg my flirty failgirl (gender neutral), beanie baby charmer.

shoutout to daddy mattyass for being the GOAT choices antagonist/secret LI. you know i have so much to say about him, but it's almost 2 am and also 90% of my ilw meta is about him anyways <3 love to hate him, hate to love him!! he lives rent free in my mind <33 (but fr, such a compelling character and no one else would've been as satisfying to deal with in the finale. i miss the king of delusion pathetic meow meow <3)

also loving luis, sunny, elena, jessica, milf mayor green, babygirl adrian kim, girlboss marianthe. every npc, every pixel and line of code and text and just everything, every thread that makes up the tapestry of this beautiful, priceless experience.

it lives on, it loves on.

pain is inevitable. it hurts because it's over, it hurts because i love this game with every fibre of my being... but love doesn't really die, does it? it lives on in a different form. the game will always be there. if anything, the fandom is alive with the love that's put into the project, the love that reaches us no matter where we are - even from the fictional town of Westchester to the Power dimension and beyond.

#it lives within #ilw #it lives anthology #ilw finale #ilw spoilers #it lives within spoilers #el.txt #A REALLY LONG RAMBLY REVIEW AND PROCESSING OF MY FEELINGS AND ALSO THANK YOU TO EVERYONE #took me a while because so much is happening but trust me ive been crying about ilw every day since the finale #there's still so much more to say but also i am so sleepy #if you've read all this i love you

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nealcassatiel · 4 years ago

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RANT ABOUT SPN FINALE

That finale was terrible and made NO SENSE. From season 1, Dean has resigned himself to letting destiny and fate and his negativity towards himself win and causing him to die young, die fighting monsters, and never have a family or get to live long enough to really experience love. But over the seasons he has slowly started to admit that deep down, he wants love, and a safe home, and to say 'fuck you' to fate and destiny - fuck you to godlike authors who want to see that destiny of him dying young play out. Dean's character arc was him realising that he can break free from that negative narrative and predetermination and live a long, happy life, in a safe home, with a loving partner. He didn't fight for nothing. Things get better. Just because you think you may die young, things change and if you fight hard enough you'll live long enough to die peacefully and not tragically young. ARE WE BACK AT SEASON 1?

And then Cas declares his love for Dean, and Dean's face says 'I love you too, but i can't process this right now, and don't do this to me now, when you're about to die!' and we never even get to see him say this to Cas's face? And after Cas's death Dean doesn't rip up heaven and hell and the empty and every fucking book in the bunker to try to get him back???? It makes no sense. And then for him to say in the finale that Cas's sacrifice won't be in vain because he will live a good happy life to prove the sacrifice was worth it - and then he dies????????? Cas sacrifices himself for beautiful gay love and the writers make it mean NOTHING. Yeh he helped sort heaven out - but his whole character arc was that he was slowly becoming MORE HUMAN. Not destined to become TOP DOG ANGEL IN CHARGE SORTING OUT HEAVEN because we HAD that storyline seasons ago but the point was that HUMANITY/DEAN/SAM and his love of humans on earth brought him back down to earth and kept him closer to humanity. He's just gone and returned to heaven's soldier???? ARE WE BACK AT SEASON 4?

And Eileen! Baddass deaf character with a whole multiple season arc as Sam's love interest? NO MENTION OF HER? Not his wife in the end? Sam not spending another second since episode 18 going and even finding her?! THE WOMAN HE LOVES?! THE AWESOME BADASS DEAF HUNTER? FUCKING DONE LIKE THAT?

AND SAM! Sam wanted a happy life outside hunting, but really, his character arc was about him becoming a leader - a Men of Letters book reading, witchy, spell-making leader who will one day stand back from the fight and have a family but also be involved in training and helping with his intelligence the next generation of hunters. No longer living under his brothers shadow, not because Dean is dead, but because he knows Dean can retire from hunting, but Sam can have both - he's good enough to have both. It's his turn to be the leader now. Dean deserves a break, and a happy retirement, Sam deserves being able to lead and EDUCATE.

It was like we reverted to the themes of season 1? Dean dying young. Sam leaving hunting for a family life with a random woman. Cas returning to being heaven's soldier. But these themes were set up to prove that this isn't the way things have to go! The entirety of season 15 was about freeing the characters from these predetermined fates, set up 15 years ago. It was about saying to them - be free, be happy, have the life you deserve. And instead they undid 15 years of storylines. The characters ended up where they'd started. Dean suffered and suffered and fought and fought and yearned for freedom and safety, and was finally told that he deserved love and freedom and that he wasn't his daddy's blunt instrument who good for nothing but dying in a fight, AND THEY KILLED HIM YOUNG IN A FIGHT, DEPENDANT ON HIS BROTHER, WITHOUT EVER KNOWING TRUE ROMANTIC LOVE, DYING IN THE WAY HE ALWAYS THOUGHT HE WOULD BUT DEEP DOWN WISHED HE WOULD NEVER.

FUCK THIS SHOW. It was the most important television show to me. I started watching it when it aired in my country in 2006. I based my academic studies and career on my love for this show, and it's left me angry and hollow. Lastly, I've never had the confidence to come out. My bisexual flag gathers dust - stuffed into the darkest corner of my closet. I don't even ave the confidence or pride to hang up a fucking flag in my room. I thought my favourite character would be like me. I thought i wasn't crazy or projecting seeing the evident romantic tropes set up. Hell, i mean I literally work in developing tv shows now - i see the tropes, i write those tropes, they are there. And I thought I would see Dean find love with Cas and was so looking forward to seeing that and thinking - that gives me real pride - I'm so proud I'm like that. But that dream also gathers dust with my fading bi flag at the back of my fucking closet. Fuck you Supernatural. I will dedicate my career to making sure i never do to an audience of a show i work on, what you have done to us.

#fuck this #so angry #supernatural #spn #i don't know what to do #i'm going to use this pain to try and fucking move on with my life

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panharmonium · 5 years ago

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@bloomiii asked: Hey! Do you think merlin actually hates Mordred?

Heya! I’m assuming this is a follow-up question to the ask that @once-and-future-gay sent me the other day, and I gotta say, I love this question just as much as I did that one, so thank you! :D It’s a great ask - relevant one, definitely, for Season 5.

I have kind of a lot to say about it, so I’m going to put most of this reply under a cut, but the short answer is this:

No, absolutely not. I don’t think Merlin hates Mordred.

I think Merlin hates himself.

I wrote in the previous post on this topic (which I think this ask is a response to) about the actual reasons why Merlin is in conflict with Mordred, none of which are based on personal dislike and all of which come back to Merlin knowing that he has to prevent Mordred from killing Arthur, not out of a selfish personal desire to keep Arthur safe, but because Arthur’s survival is supposed to be the thing that is going to bring peace to the land and liberate the magical world.

But Merlin, as I said in that post, does not want to be in conflict with Mordred. He likes Mordred. He says as much, to Gaius. He cares about Mordred as someone who shares his oppression, as shown in the beginning of the Disir. He agrees to keep Kara a secret from Arthur, at the beginning of 5.11. And Mordred’s philosophy - “the love that binds us is more important than the power we wield” - is literally as close to Merlin’s own as it can be. That is exactly how Merlin, at his core, sees the world.

Everything Merlin does to Mordred, he does for no other reason than that he thinks he has to. (And I discussed in that other piece how Merlin is not foolish or mistaken for thinking so, either - important to keep in mind.) But all of the things he has to do go completely against his nature, and by the time we hit the end of 5.11, I really feel that Merlin has descended into a pit of self-loathing that the show, because its ending is so poorly constructed, never allows him to climb out of.

Every decision Merlin is forced to make about Mordred makes him hate himself a little more. The decision to let Mordred die in 5.05 is visibly traumatizing for him. He takes no pleasure in leaving Mordred behind for Morgana in 5.10. And 5.11 is the ugliest, most soul-killing situation Merlin has been confronted with yet - he is torn between doing what he truly wants to do and what he feels like he has to do, when Kara comes into the picture. He initially tries to hide Kara from Arthur, because there is no part of him that wants a Druid to be captured and harmed, even if she was with Morgana’s forces. Mordred tells Merlin, “she’s one of us,” and Merlin agrees. “Your secret is safe with me,” he says (and those are sacred words for Merlin; they’re exactly what Lancelot says to him in 1.05; this is not something Merlin would ever promise lightly). He doesn’t betray Mordred’s secret, and when Kara is captured (through no fault of Merlin’s own) Merlin is the one who originally urges mercy, telling Arthur, “you’re breaking his heart/you’ll lose his trust” when Arthur claims he has no choice but to pursue execution.

However, after that, when Merlin learns that Mordred plans to escape with Kara, he boomerangs back to “he’s going to run to Morgana and then he’s going to kill Arthur and I am not allowed to let that happen/magical and godly forces have all told me that the entire fate of Albion and the future of magic all depends on me preventing Mordred from killing Arthur.” And so he tells Arthur that Mordred is planning to escape, ultimately leading to Mordred and Kara’s recapture.

But THEN, after THAT, when they’re back in custody - Merlin urges mercy yet again. He tells Arthur to “free them both.” He says, “How will one more death bring about the peace we long for?” Merlin does not want Kara to be killed. He does not want Mordred to suffer. He does not want any of this to have happened; he did not rat Mordred out because he wanted to; he did it because he truly believed (for legitimate reasons) that he had no choice. Like I talked about in that previous post - Merlin, at this point in the show, feels that his life has no purpose beyond the fulfillment of the destiny that has been prophesied. He has come to see himself as a tool, with no intrinsic worth or value beyond what he can do to ensure Arthur’s survival (and thus the establishment of peace for all people). He hates the things he’s supposed to do, but he literally cannot see an escape for himself. This is just what he was “born” to do.

Even as far back as Season 3 we see this helplessness growing in him:

You feel trapped. Like your whole life has been planned out for you, and you've got no control over anything, and sometimes you don't even know if what destiny has decided is really the best thing at all.

Merlin, in 5.11, doesn’t feel like what destiny has decided is the best thing. But he also has reached a point where he feels like he has to do what he was told. He’s seen the future. He’s been told by multiple magical and divine sources that Arthur is the Once and Future King who is going to build the “the world we dream of.” And so he does things that he thinks will enable that future to arrive (like preventing Mordred from running away with Kara), but because these things go so completely against his nature and cause him such pain, he then whips around and says, “Don’t kill her. Let them go.” He can’t help himself from slipping back into the kind of person he truly is on the inside.

He is trapped between his true self and what he feels is an inescapable duty. And every step he takes away from his true nature makes him hate himself more.

Kara’s interview with Arthur, where she refuses to repent her “crimes” in exchange for her life, has one of the most telling, devastating shots in the show, when she says, “It is not a crime to fight for the right to be who you are.” The camera, in that moment, is trained on Merlin’s face, not hers:

That is done on purpose. The cinematography is trying to say something. It wants us to look at Merlin and listen to Kara’s word’s and hear the contradiction. It wants us to recognize that Merlin is dying inside. The absolute MISERY locked down in his expression here! He has been forced to do things that seem to work against the very goal he’s been told he’s trying to achieve (to have the right to be who he is), and it’s been going on for so long that it’s shattered his soul. He listens to Kara being able to say that, proudly, without fear, and he hates himself for not being like her.

But he can’t see any way to escape the things he knows he’s supposed to do. So ultimately, at the very end, he does nothing, and Kara’s execution proceeds.

He despises himself for it, and when Mordred escapes and runs to Morgana, Merlin’s only reaction is a dull, hollow resignation. He doesn’t blame Mordred for whatever’s going to happen next.

He blames himself.

This is, yet again, another reason why the Merlin finale is garbage storytelling.

It makes no narrative sense for the show to give us 5.11, which ends with Merlin in quite possibly the darkest and most miserable, conflicted spot he has ever been in, and to then start the next episode with him having a raucous good time at the tavern. Merlin, after what happens with Kara and Mordred, is not going to be out laughing and cheering, playing dice, and making casual, tongue-in-cheek, meta jokes about his secret like it isn’t the most painful and soul-destroying burden he’s ever had to carry (“Ah, I knew you’d discover my secret in the end. There is just no fooling you, my lord!”). It is inconceivable for him to be out partying, after the previous episode. It’s insulting to me as a viewer, that the writers thought they could show this to me as if it’s an even remotely rational direction for the story to go, as if I’m not going ask “what the HECK is going on???” when I see Merlin gleefully stumbling home like a drunken frat boy, without a care or concern in the world.

There is ZERO tonal consistency between the end of 5.11 and the beginning of 5.12. It’s horrendous writing, and it’s why I continuously say that Merlin BBC does not actually end, it just STOPS - abruptly cut off after 5.11, with a slapdash two-episode finale tacked on, one which does not actually resolve anyone’s arcs, or address any of the central questions of the show, or follow where the narrative was naturally heading prior to that point.

Merlin’s arc with Mordred is what finally takes him to a place where he is irrevocably, inescapably confronted with the conflict that he has been struggling with from day one - how is he supposed to justify the things that Destiny is asking him to do, when what it’s asking him to do seems to be hurting the very people he’s trying to help? How is he supposed to reconcile his responsibility to his people (and HIMSELF) with an externally-imposed responsibility to protect Arthur? He’s been wrestling with this cognitive dissonance for years, and 5.11 is the inevitable crisis point - Kara is dead, Mordred has defected to Morgana, Merlin’s secret is OUT, and Merlin has never hated or doubted himself more. It makes no sense for the beginning of the next episode to show us Merlin living it up at the tavern. Merlin is tortured, at the end of 5.11. He’s dying inside. The next episode was supposed to be a natural progression from that moment, meaning Merlin should have had the chance to finally confront his conflict head-on, rather than having it all completely wiped away by the pile of garbage that was the finale.

The correct fallout from Mordred’s “turn” should have been a reckoning. Merlin never wanted to be in conflict with Mordred in the first place; he hated himself for everything he had to do, and I really think the end of 5.11 took us to a place where Merlin had finally been pushed over the edge; it was the last straw. The only correct progression from that point would have been change, and Merlin was finally desperate enough to do what he needed to do to find himself again and make things right, but we never got to see it, because the people in charge decided to completely abandon every complicated question they’d been pursuing, in favor of “actually Arthur’s the good guy and we’re gonna pretend we didn’t just spend an entire episode reminding people how Camelot is still an unjust place.”

I don’t understand it. The same people created 5.11, too. They wrote Kara’s righteous speech. They framed her execution as an evil, and they framed Mordred’s flight as something Merlin and Arthur brought upon themselves.

And then they did a 180 and dumped every ethical question they ever raised. They never let Merlin find his feet or hold his head up high, and I’m honestly never going to forgive them for that.

#the once and future slowburn #meta #the druid boy #replies #merlin S5

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pop-punklouis · 5 years ago

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top five HL fanfic!!!!

biiiiitch you all know how hard it is for me to choose only 5. but sigh FINE here’s my all-time favorite list that isn’t 5 sorry i can’t choose 😔:

• Here in the Afterglow (89k)

“If you hadn’t noticed, I don’t have many friends,” Louis whispers, the blossom of insecurity in his stomach unfurling and clawing its way into his throat.

Harry is silent for a long time, and then he speaks; a soft, slow uncurl that makes Louis’ stomach shake. “I’ll be your friend.” 1970’s AU. In a tiny town in Idaho, Louis’ life is changed forever by the arrival of a curious stranger.

• Coax the Cold (86k)

England, 1897.

English Professor Louis Tomlinson’s passion for the occult has been a source of mockery and derision for most of his life. When he hears whispers of a travelling freak show newly established in London claiming the existence of a monstrous sea hybrid, half-man, half-fish, Louis sees it as his ticket to credibility amongst his peers. The summer he spends undercover working on the show, however, gives him much more than that.

• Wild and Unruly (124k)

Harry is a cowboy sitting on the biggest oil reservoir in Wyoming, and Louis is the paralegal assigned to pressure him into selling his land.

• This Wicked Game (70k)

An AU in which The Bachelor is gay, Louis is a contestant, Harry is the bachelor, everyone drinks a lot of champagne, the entire world gets to watch them fall in love, and no one plays by the rules.

• Love is a Rebellious Bird (135k)

AU in which the boys still make music. Louis is the concertmaster of the London Symphony Orchestra, Harry is the New! and Exciting! interim conductor/ex-cello prodigy who "has made Mozart cool again" according to Esquire Magazine (Louis hates him immediately, which is definitely why he internet stalked him in his dark bedroom late at night that one time), and Niall is the best. Zayn and Liam are around too.

• Fixated On One Star (53k)

Louis is just a boy with the world on his shoulders, and Harry's just a boy from the wrong side of the galaxy. A little thing like love doesn't stand a chance against a thousand years of war, at least until the right two come along to break the mold.

Or: space Romeo and Juliet AU

• Finding Lou (60k)

Louis is the nomadic stranger who wanders into Harry’s bookstore. Harry is the skeptic who falls for him.

• California Sold

Notoriously closeted boyband member Harry Styles is famous on a global scale, meanwhile Louis, as his best friend, is back home in Manchester, living the typical life of a 24 year old. When Harry needs Louis with him in LA, a publicity stunt gone wrong changes their friendship forever.

A fake-relationship AU between two lifelong best friends.

• Empty Skies (134k)

For three years, Harry has been running from his past. Now, he is moving to London and pledges to fulfil his only dream -- making it big in the music industry. Not everyone has a place, though, and the competition is tough. As is his past catching up on him.

Louis is part of the biggest boy band of the world, and getting there had meant a lot of hard work, as well as sacrificing parts of his heart and soul. He's still happy. Maybe not as happy as he could be, but who is he to complain?

• And Then a Bit (159k)

“We’d like to give the fans what they want.” Magee states, placing his hand on the table in front of him and leaning forward. “We want to give them Larry Stylinson.”

Or, take a parallel universe where Louis and Harry were never together, mix in a two year hiatus and an impending comeback, pour in a dash of lost fans, two tablespoons of strong friendship and a Modest! employee with a good idea. Add a squeeze of pretending to be a couple, lots of kisses and a tattoo or two. Stir. Serve: the mother of all publicity stunts. (aka Harry and Louis fake a relationship for publicity. Eventually it becomes a lot less fake and a lot more real.)

• Dream Awake (31k)

The sun leaks through the tent wall behind him the way it leaks through eyelids, bathing the boy in an ethereal half-light as he croons. The crowd is mesmerized. Louis is mesmerized. This is the most important person in the world, he thinks wildly, and then can't figure out how to take it back.

On a hazy day in August, Louis sees Harry perform at a music festival as an unsigned act and convinces him to spend the rest of the weekend in his company. Harry gets signed; life changes. They never really wake up from the dream.

• Say You’ll Remember (93.5k)

au. louis and harry are best mates that are only half aware that they're also soulmates. alternatively, louis goes to university and harry travels the world, and they always manage to find their way back to each other.

takes place over nine years, in which they love and hurt, make mistakes and learn, and above all, grow.

• Outwit, Outplay, Outlast (61k)

Survivor All-Stars AU in which Harry and Louis are just in this game to win the million dollars, but they end up with something better.

Featuring Harry's yellow swim shorts, Louis in snapbacks, and OT5 shenanigans.

• Nothing Else But Us Right Here (35k)

Louis sighs and gives himself a mental pep talk as he smooths his jumper down over his hips. He can do this. He can resist the draw of Harry Styles, because he is a responsible, mature adult, and as much as he wants to tangle his fingers in that mess of hair and map those ridiculous tattoos with his tongue, he does not want to get his daughter’s favorite teacher fired.

• Wings to Break Your Fall (103k)

strip club AU. Harry’s work and family are keeping him busy. He really isn’t looking for a relationship, doesn’t want one. He just wants Louis. Problem is, Louis has other plans.

• Leave it to the Breeze (81k)

Louis couldn’t be prouder of his bake, but there’s something—there’s something. Something about Harry Styles and the earnest way he measures, pours, mixes, scrapes. Something about the tip of his tongue poking out of his mouth as he knocks the air out of his batter.

or a great british bake off au in which louis cares about winning and winning only, harry is made of sunshine and rainbow sprinkles, and niall sticks his nose into other people's business. also featuring liam as louis's best friend-slash-concerned mother, and zayn as a macaron connoisseur.

• You Come Beating Like Moth’s Wings (81k)

Harry smiles. He's only known Louis for about two hours, knows nothing about him past his first name, but he's nice and sarcastic and helpful and so, so pretty. And Harry's still got a few days left in Barcelona, and he thinks he wouldn't mind spending them with Louis.

Also known as, Harry takes the summer before uni to travel Europe and meets Louis in Barcelona, and they end up traveling together.

• Hold Me Closer (36.5k)

Louis Tomlinson is one of the most promising dancers of the English National Ballet, on track to become the youngest principal dancer in the company's history. That is, until forces conspire to significantly complicate his life, including: a surprise ballet, an unfairly attractive guest choreographer, and being pushed into a rivalry with his best mate. Featuring lots of wine, dancing, pining, and a happy ending.

• In Vogue (121k)

Fashion AU. Louis is the editor in chief of Vogue magazine, and Harry's running British GQ. Featuring Zayn as the crazy creative director and Louis' confidant, Liam as the sports writer that gets to sit front row at fashion week and DJ Neil as the only sane person in the whole story. (There are no skinny jeans in this fic)

• These Things Will Never Change for Us at All (1.5k)

The room falls silent as they stay wrapped up in each other. Harry can feel Louis’ soft breaths on his neck, and he almost thinks Louis’ fallen asleep until he says softly, “How did you know you were in love with me?”

Or, Harry and Louis look back on five years.

• A Runaway American Dream (15k)

AU. they take route 66 with only each other and their secrets.

• Things Have Gotten Closer to the Sun (49k)

it’s strange, making the choice to face his past—it almost feels like he’s heading for the sun straight on, like he’s screaming come on and burn me, i deserve it.

when a solar flare is announced to end the world in twelve days, harry reunites with the people that he used to know better than the back of his own hand.

• Here (in your arms) (60k)

the one where Louis is a successful real estate agent and Harry works at a retirement home. They’ve never had a real home. Up until now.

(Starring Liam Payne as a fitness trainer, Zayn as an artist, and Niall, who busks.)

• These Inconvenient Fireworks (190k)

Future AU in which nobody tries out for X Factor but the boys end up finding one other eventually anyway. Louis is a jaded bastard who owns a cat named Duchess and teaches drama to teenagers, Harry is an idealistic aspiring photographer/part-time footy coach, Zayn teaches English lit and wears leather jackets, Liam saves people from burning buildings, and Niall is Niall.

• In Dreams (23k)

AU. When Harry moves to a new city, his new flat come with a number of sweet, anonymous gifts and surprises that brighten his days. Could it be a friendly ghost? Another friendly presence in his new building is his tattooed neighbor, Louis, who seems determined to put a smile back on his face.

• My Heart is Breathing for this Moment in Time (160k)

When Louis first saw Harry at the 2010 X Factor Auditions, he thought he was watching a peculiarly special stranger. But Harry has known Louis ever since he was five years old. Because Louis has a rare genetic disorder that causes him to Time Travel to important moments in his past and in his future - and to Harry, always to Harry. When they’re put into a band together, it seems like everything Harry has been waiting and wishing for has finally come true. Except for the small fact that Louis doesn’t know that Harry is in love with him- that Harry’s always been in love with him. Fate, it would seem, is just getting started.

A story about growing up and growing together, and the impossible love that makes it all worthwhile.

• Paint the Sky with Stars (63k)

On 10 April 1912, Harry Styles boards the finest ship the world has ever seen. Still grieving the death of their mother, he and his sister are being sent to America to live with a callous uncle who cares more about his business connections than family. Harry prepares himself for a long, disappointing voyage alone in his stateroom. Louis Tomlinson has borrowed and saved, and finally has enough to purchase a Third Class ticket to America. With all of his belongings in a single ruck sack, he boards the Titanic filled with hope for a brighter future. Never one to sit still, he can’t resist exploring the massive ship, and soon goes sneaking into First Class in a stolen steward’s uniform. By a twist of fate, Louis finds himself in Harry’s stateroom, entranced by the most attractive man he’s ever laid eyes on. He keeps returning day after day, even if he doesn’t understand what it is about Harry that continues pulling him in. That’s all right; Louis has a week to figure it out, and Harry is plenty willing to help. Except they don’t have a week. They have four days. Because on 15 April, their entire world will be turned upside down.

Or, the historically accurate Titanic AU with a happy ending.

• Through Eerie Chaos (102k)

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

#whew!#favorite fics #grey

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richincolor · 4 years ago

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New Releases for the Week of May 3, 2021

It's great to see so many new books hitting the shelves this week. I know I've been waiting for several of these and am happy to be able to finally read them.

The Ones We’re Meant to Find by Joan He Roaring Brook

Cee has been trapped on an abandoned island for three years without any recollection of how she arrived, or memories from her life prior. All she knows is that somewhere out there, beyond the horizon, she has a sister named Kay. Determined to find her, Cee devotes her days to building a boat from junk parts scavenged inland, doing everything in her power to survive until the day she gets off the island and reunites with her sister.

In a world apart, 16-year-old STEM prodigy Kasey Mizuhara is also living a life of isolation. The eco-city she calls home is one of eight levitating around the world, built for people who protected the planet―and now need protecting from it. With natural disasters on the rise due to climate change, eco-cities provide clean air, water, and shelter. Their residents, in exchange, must spend at least a third of their time in stasis pods, conducting business virtually whenever possible to reduce their environmental footprint. While Kasey, an introvert and loner, doesn’t mind the lifestyle, her sister Celia hated it. Popular and lovable, Celia much preferred the outside world. But no one could have predicted that Celia would take a boat out to sea, never to return.

Now it’s been three months since Celia’s disappearance, and Kasey has given up hope. Logic says that her sister must be dead. But as the public decries her stance, she starts to second guess herself and decides to retrace Celia’s last steps. Where they’ll lead her, she does not know. Her sister was full of secrets. But Kasey has a secret of her own. — Cover image and summary via Goodreads

Meet Cute Diary by Emery Lee Quill Tree Books

Noah Ramirez thinks he’s an expert on romance. He has to be for his popular blog, the Meet Cute Diary, a collection of trans happily ever afters. There’s just one problem—all the stories are fake. What started as the fantasies of a trans boy afraid to step out of the closet has grown into a beacon of hope for trans readers across the globe.

When a troll exposes the blog as fiction, Noah’s world unravels. The only way to save the Diary is to convince everyone that the stories are true, but he doesn’t have any proof. Then Drew walks into Noah’s life, and the pieces fall into place: Drew is willing to fake-date Noah to save the Diary. But when Noah’s feelings grow beyond their staged romance, he realizes that dating in real life isn’t quite the same as finding love on the page.

In this charming novel by Emery Lee, Noah will have to choose between following his own rules for love or discovering that the most romantic endings are the ones that go off script. — Cover image and summary via Goodreads

They Better Call Me Sugar: My Journey from the Hood to the Hardwood by Sugar Rodgers Black Sheep

Growing up in dire poverty in Suffolk, Virginia, Sugar (born Ta’Shauna) Rodgers never imagined that she would become an all-star player in the WNBA (Women’s National Basketball Association). Both of her siblings were in and out of prison throughout much of her childhood and shootings in her neighborhood were commonplace. For Sugar this was just a fact of life.

While academics wasn’t a high priority for Sugar and many of her friends, athletics always played a prominent role. She mastered her three-point shot on a net her brother put up just outside their home, eventually becoming so good that she could hustle local drug dealers out of money in one-on-one contests.

With the love and support of her family and friends, Sugar’s performance on her high school basketball team led to her recruitment by the Georgetown Hoyas, and her eventual draft into the WNBA in 2013 by the Minnesota Lynx (who won the WNBA Finals in Sugar’s first year). The first of her family to attend college, Sugar speaks of her struggles both academically and as an athlete with raw honesty.

Sugar’s road to a successful career as a professional basketball player is fraught with sadness and death–including her mother’s death when she’s fourteen, which leaves Sugar essentially homeless. Throughout it all, Sugar clings to basketball as a way to keep herself focused and sane.

And now Sugar shares her story as a message of hope and inspiration for young girls and boys everywhere, but especially those growing up in economically challenging conditions. Never sugarcoating her life experiences, she delivers a powerful message of discipline, perseverance, and always believing in oneself. — Cover image and summary via Goodreads

Excuse Me While I Ugly Cry by Joya Goffney HarperTeen

Quinn keeps lists of everything—from the days she’s ugly cried, to “Things That I Would Never Admit Out Loud,” to all the boys she’d like to kiss. Her lists keep her sane. By writing her fears on paper, she never has to face them in real life. That is, until her journal goes missing…

An anonymous account posts one of her lists on Instagram for the whole school to see and blackmails her into facing seven of her greatest fears, or else her entire journal will go public. Quinn doesn’t know who to trust. Desperate, she teams up with Carter Bennett—the last known person to have her journal—in a race against time to track down the blackmailer.

Together, they journey through everything Quinn’s been too afraid to face, and along the way, Quinn finds the courage to be honest, to live in the moment, and to fall in love. — Cover image and summary via Goodreads

Hurricane Summer by Asha Bromfield Wednesday Books

Tilla has spent her entire life trying to make her father love her. But every six months, he leaves their family and returns to his true home: the island of Jamaica.

When Tilla’s mother tells her she’ll be spending the summer on the island, Tilla dreads the idea of seeing him again, but longs to discover what life in Jamaica has always held for him.

In an unexpected turn of events, Tilla is forced to face the storm that unravels in her own life as she learns about the dark secrets that lie beyond the veil of paradise—all in the midst of an impending hurricane.

Hurricane Summer is a powerful coming of age story that deals with colorism, classism, young love, the father-daughter dynamic—and what it means to discover your own voice in the center of complete destruction. — Cover image and summary via Goodreads

Indivisible by Daniel Aleman Little, Brown Books for Young Readers

There is a word Mateo Garcia and his younger sister Sophie have been taught to fear for as long as they can remember: deportation. Over the past few years, however, the fear that their undocumented immigrant parents could be sent back to Mexico has started to fade to the back of their minds. And why wouldn’t it, when their Ma and Pa have been in the United States for so long, they have American-born children, and they’re hard workers and good neighbors?

When two ICE agents come asking for Pa, the Garcia family realizes that the lives they’ve built are about to come crumbling down. And when Mateo returns from school one day to find that his parents have been taken, he’ll have to come to terms with the fact that his family’s worst nightmare has become a reality.

With his Ma and Pa being held in separate detention centers, Mateo must learn how to look after his sister and himself. The choices Mateo makes, and the people he turns to for help, might reunite his family… or tear them apart for good. With his parents’ fate and his own future hanging in the balance, Mateo must figure out who he is and what he is capable of, even as he’s forced to question what it means to be an American teenager in a country that rejects his own mom and dad. — Cover art and summary via Goodreads

Counting Down with You by Tashie Bhuiyan Inkyard Press

Karina Ahmed has a plan. Keep her head down, get through high school without a fuss, and follow her parents’ rules—even if it means sacrificing her dreams. When her parents go abroad to Bangladesh for four weeks, Karina expects some peace and quiet. Instead, one simple lie unravels everything.

Karina is my girlfriend.

Tutoring the school’s resident bad boy was already crossing a line. Pretending to date him? Out of the question. But Ace Clyde does everything right—he brings her coffee in the mornings, impresses her friends without trying, and even promises to buy her a dozen books (a week) if she goes along with his fake-dating facade. Though Karina agrees, she can’t help but start counting down the days until her parents come back.

T-minus twenty-eight days until everything returns to normal—but what if Karina no longer wants it to? — Cover image and summary via Goodreads

All Kinds of Other by James Sie Quill Tree Books

In this tender, nuanced coming-of-age love story, two boys—one who is cis and one who is trans—have been guarding their hearts to protect themselves, until their feelings for each other give them a reason to stand up to their fears.

Two boys are starting at a new school.

Jules is just figuring out what it means to be gay and hasn’t totally decided whether he wants to be out at his new school. His parents and friends have all kinds of opinions, but for his part, Jules just wants to make the basketball team and keep his head down.

Jack is trying to start over after a best friend break-up. He followed his actor father clear across the country to LA, but he’s also totally ready to leave his past behind. Maybe this new school where no one knows him is exactly what he needs.

When the two boys meet, the sparks are undeniable. But then a video surfaces linking Jack to a pair of popular transgender vloggers, and the revelations about Jack’s past thrust both Jack and Jules into the spotlight they’ve been trying to avoid. Suddenly both boys have a choice to make—between lying low where it’s easier or following their hearts. — Cover image and summary via Goodreads

Luck of the Titanic by Stacey Lee G.P. Putnam's Sons Books for Young Readers

Southampton, 1912: Seventeen-year-old British-Chinese Valora Luck has quit her job and smuggled herself aboard the Titanic with two goals in mind: to reunite with her twin brother Jamie--her only family now that both their parents are dead--and to convince a part-owner of the Ringling Brothers Circus to take the twins on as acrobats. Quick-thinking Val talks her way into opulent firstclass accommodations and finds Jamie with a group of fellow Chinese laborers in third class. But in the rigidly stratified world of the luxury liner, Val's ruse can only last so long, and after two long years apart, it's unclear if Jamie even wants the life Val proposes. Then, one moonless night in the North Atlantic, the unthinkable happens--the supposedly unsinkable ship is dealt a fatal blow--and Val and her companions suddenly find themselves in a race to survive.

Stacey Lee, master of historical fiction, brings a fresh perspective to an infamous tragedy, loosely inspired by the recently uncovered account of six Titanic survivors of Chinese descent.

#new releases #YALit

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sd1970x · 4 years ago

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Marinette, work in progress - Ch4 - BlueCollar

Read also on AO3: here first chapter | previous chapter | next chapter

Marinette took the short path home as she hopped, still transformed, towards her balcony. No sooner than reaching her room, she thrust herself into her bed and her face into her pillow.

“Spots off.”

The suit dissolved and Tikki emerged, hovering about. She was quick to pick up on Marinette’s distress.

“Marinette, is everything okay?”

Marinette turned her head towards Tikki, peeking just a tad out.

"No.” She tersely replied, then turned away again. “I’m not fit to be a superheroine.”

“What? Why would you say that?” Tikki shuddered.

“Why? because I’m not even a real girl and I nearly failed because of that!”

Tikki just stared back, wordlessly.Marinette slowly rose up and sat upright at her bed.

“If being a girl is so much better for me… why wasn’t I just born one? Maybe I should just accept my fate. I can’t win this one.”

Marinette tried to look away as Tikki hovered in front of her, denying her the option to end the conversation just yet.

“Maybe fate has crossed your path with the miraculous because of that? Because your burning desire to be a girl means something?”

Marinette looked back, contemplating Tikki’s words.

“All it means is that I’m a wannabe and that I’ll end up embarrassing everyone who believes in me. Like Alya and Mylene.”

Marinette recalled the conversation back at school lunch. Alya and Mylene sure seemed to think very highly of her.

“They sure don’t seem to think that way, and they should know a thing or two about girl power.”

That much was true, even Marinette had to admit it.

I don’t know Alya and Mylene that much and yet they’ve both already managed to impress me, Alya for standing up to Chloe and Mylene for standing up for what counts in this city. Maybe I shouldn’t be so quick to brush off their instincts, and take their trust as affirmation.

“What is it that makes you think you’re a boy, Marinette?”

Marinette’s mind screeched to a halt.

I might not be a true-born girl… but I’m not a boy either. What the hell am I, again?

“I… I don’t know anymore.” she whispered and Tikki smiled.

Marinette flared up her computer and started looking at some of her designs. She followed by reading some of her hidden computer diary entries.

The more she looked at her designs, the more she read into her diary entries, the muddier the answer in her mind became.

Maybe these tell the story of what I am better than everything else? What is it that makes a design “a girl’s design”? Or a story “a boy’s story”?

Before she noticed it, it was time for dinner, followed by shower and bedtime.

---

It was the last thing Marinette thought would happen to her. Chloe was the first to point at her and explode into mocking laughter, interrupting the morning’s lesson.

“Look at Marin! What’s Gay-boy doing with pink trousers in class?”

Instinctively she tried to cup her breasts, but they weren’t there anymore.

Oh no… the magic… it… dissipated? But… how? Why?

Soon enough, most of the class burst into laughter. She braved a look at herself and her heart sank.

She was back in her boy-suit, the one she thought she had discarded already. The sensation of body hair that she did not miss, back to haunt her.

Everyone laughed at her. Even her teacher! Caline bustier, otherwise a fair and decent teacher, joining up with class, pointing at her.

No. No no no. This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening!

She tried to scream, but only muffled sounds came about. She tried to run away, but she felt like her muscles betrayed her. The sounds of laughter echoed around her, piercing her soul.

“Gay-Boy! Gay-Boy in pink!”

She decided she must gather her energy and leave class, but felt herself jerked upwards instead.

Into a seating position, in her bed, covered in cold sweat and panting heavily.

“Are you okay, Marinette?” Tikki flew by, worried.

“It was a nightmare.” she blurted out.

A most vivid one, that’s bound to come to life as soon as the magic dissipates.

Marinette woke up early that day, still exhausted from the night. The sight of herself in the mirror did quite a bit to cheer her up.

It’s not a dream after all. Maybe if I hold onto it, it won’t slip from my grip.

She combed and tied her hair neatly, brushed her teeth and went downstairs to have her breakfast.

“At least you won’t be late today, honey.” Her mom smiled at her.

Having a properly-paced, non-rushed breakfast also proved helpful for her mood. She walked towards school, hoping that the new day would bring relief from yesterday’s battle and that awful night.

---

Mylene was one of the first to enter class, picking up the aptitude test results from the teacher’s desk.

While she feared many things, math wasn’t one of them. The good grades were sure to make her parents happy and perhaps more lenient in letting her go out on more activities like she had wanted.

Then again, someone next to her was clearly unhappy about their test results.

Ivan seemed to be very happy to see her come over, but immediately switched his looks back to his test results and gloominess was quick to take hold.

“What’s the matter, Ivan?”

Ivan paused before spitting it out.

“I… barely passed it. I was this close to flunking it. I’m no good at maths.”

Chloe kept filing her nails as she overheard their conversation.

“Oh, don’t you worry about it, there would still be plenty of higher education options available for people like you.” she commented.

Ivan looked at her, dumbfounded, while Mylene eyed Chloe suspiciously.

What’s she planning? Is it a rare moment of kindness, or a ploy to make things worse?

“ Ecole-de-imbecile , of course. You’ll eke out a meager living hauling boxes for people like me who will run daddy’s hotel.”

And to think I believed it could be the first for even a split of a second.

Ivan grit his teeth and looked like he was about to respond, then looked at his test results again.

“... Up until you become totally useless, at which point you’ll probably find yourself homeless in the streets, your wife dumping you, if you ever had one in the first place. Guess that’s too bad.”

“Chloe, you’re the meanest! Ivan is-” Mylene tried to protest but Chloe was quick to shut her down.

“-a loser, and the world doesn’t need losers in it. Sorry, that’s just how it is.”

Ivan clenched his fist and ran off to the locker room. Mylene looked at Chloe accusingly for a brief moment, only to refocus her attention on following up on Ivan.

---

Light intruded upon Hawk Moth’s domain as his senses picked up on a victim of choice.

“Fear of the future. Fear of who you may become. Uncertainty. Go forth, my precious akuma, let his self-doubt seal the fate for Ladybug and Chat Noir!”

---

Marinette was walking through the corridor, looking at her aptitude test report card, when Ivan nearly bumped into her. She dodged it at the last moment and was quite surprised when Ivan said nothing.

He is usually very nice and polite, despite his brutish looks. That’s not like him not to apologize.

Something must have happened. This doesn’t look good.

Before she had much time to dwell on it, Mylene came about, looking around.

“Marinette, have you seen Ivan?”

“Yeah, he went that way.” She said as she pointed out the direction. “Has anything happened?”

“I’m tempted to just say ‘Chloe happened’”, Mylene replied, “but she’s outdone even herself.

She told Ivan his test results set him for a life of failure.”

“How mean!”

Mylene nodded.

“He deserves so much better than that.”

With that, she rushed forwards to search for Ivan, leaving Marinette behind with more than one thing to think about.

Does this one test really set up our fate for the future?

Of course not! I mean, I’m sure Ivan can change it!

Are we the masters of our own fate, or has it been written for us?

Then again…

She looked at her hands and imaginary boy hands were superimposed on them.

Is my fate in my own hands?

---

The butterfly easily homed on the sobbing student in the locker room, landing on a decorative pin he was wearing.

“ BlueCollar , I am Hawk Moth. Your fate has been rewritten, your destiny now changed. You shall lead a revolution.”

---

Marinette was just leaving class as a confrontation outside on the street drew her attention. It was Chloe and her dad, the mayor, arguing with a figure that seemed like a large and sturdy construction worker.

“Shouldn’t you be doing your job?” Chloe yelled at the figure. “Daddy, tell him!”

“How insolent. I don’t report to you. I’m BlueCollar and I report to Hawk Moth.”

Chloe and the mayor shuddered at these words and tried to back away slowly, but BlueCollar wouldn’t stop.

“Maybe you two will finally do something useful for the people of Paris!” BlueCollar went on and a blue streak of energy engulfed the two of them.

Chloe found herself donning a sanitation worker’s uniform and holding a broom. In a moment, magical compulsion forced her to start cleaning the street, much to BlueCollar’s satisfaction.

Marinette was quick to hide in a nearby alley.

“We’re needed. Time to transform! Tikki, spots on!”

Marinette emerged from the alley, with Chat Noir arriving at the scene at the exact same time.

“Please, Ladybug, Chat Noir, save us from this fate!” Chloe managed to say before BlueCollar’s magical compulsion forced her to tend to her work again.

Marinette barely managed to stifle her giggle.

Isn’t that some poetic justice out there. A taste of your own medicine, Chloe. Maybe a few hours of work would do you good.

Marinette and Chat Noir both hopped on to a higher ground to make plans. Then again, one of them had plans the other probably did not think of.

“So. BlueCollar’s power is making people work for him. We must avoid his strike at all costs.” Marinette remarked.

“We have more than enough work without his powers employing us. But would you like to go for coffee once our work is done?”

Marinette froze in place as she tried to digest his words.

“Huh? Are you… asking me out?”

He flashed a grin.

“Well, all work and no play is a major hassle. I’m a playful cat, try me”

He can’t be serious. My god, what’s wrong with him?

“A playful cat.”

“Uh-huh.”

“And your game is... prowling about, hunting down a superheroine for a superhero.”

“Yep.”

“Swooping someone, from partner to lover. Oh, such brag rights! A game with a prize!”

“I don’t see why not. If you’re into it...” he smiled.

My god. He really knows no limit.

Marinette poked him in his chest.

“Do I look like I’m some prize to be won, partner?”

His smile faded in an instant.

“We save Paris together. Save your romantic aspirations for someone else.”

She then pointed his head towards BlueCollar as he went towards the city hall. “Does this look like a game to you? No? Then this should be your focus.”

Both Marinette and Chat Noir darted down to confront BlueCollar, avoiding his zaps successfully but making little headway.

Chat Noir managed to strike him with his baton, only to feel the recoil as he proved far too sturdy to be impacted. Marinette fared pretty much the same, as he simply flung her away with her own yo-yo.

Making things worse, they were quickly approached by a league of BlueCollar’s supporting workers, armed with whatever they were using for their jobs.

“Looks like we need some pest control.” One of them remarked as he eyed Marinette.

“And a feral cat problem to handle.” another added, looking at Chat Noir.

“Hate to disappoint. I’m fully domesticated. Cataclysm!” Chat Noir called it as he touched the ground, creating a chasm and allowing both Marinette and him to escape to safety.

“Well, we don’t have much time, do we?” Chat remarked and Marinette nodded in agreement.

“It’s time for my thing, then. Lucky charm!” she called it, cupping her hands to grab a falling...

״Miner’s helmet? What am I going to do with that?״

She briefly flicked its headlight on, then flicked it off.

“Okay, Chat, here’s the plan…”

---

BlueCollar kept roaming the streets, until something caught his eye. It was an open manhole in the middle of the road, with an electricity cable running into it.

Clearly, someone was doing maintenance work in a negligent and extremely unsafe manner. No markings whatsoever, no signs to ward off pedestrians and no one to call should help be required.

As BlueCollar approached the manhole, Chat Noir jumped downwards from a nearby building and landed forcefully on his back. BlueCollar fell forwards and upside down, finding himself jammed into the hole, unable to move.

The hole was dark as night, although in a moment he was blinded by what seemed to be a flashlight. A short while afterwards, he managed to see it for what it was - Ladybug wearing a miner’s helmet.

“This site does employ some workplace safety” she commented as she walked slowly towards him. He could only watch as she removed his collar and broke it in two, releasing the akuma.

“No more evildoing for you, little akuma. Time to de-evilize!” she called it, as she whipped her yo-yo and whisked it away.

“Miraculous… Ladybug!”

As she flung the helmet upwards, it burst into a stream of Ladybugs, releasing all those bound to work by BlueCollar’s powers, including Chloe and her father.

---

“Pound it!” Ladybug offered her hand for a fistbump, and Adrien’s was quick to respond in like.

“You’re not mad at me, are you?” he offered cautiously.

“It was a close call” she replied, her face showing little emotion, but she quickly softened. “But you do make a great partner. Respect my limits and it will stay that way.”

She followed by a short-lived smile, then hopped away and disappeared.

Adrien’s eyes followed her wake until she was gone from his sight. He breathed in relief, then sighed.

“I guess it’s just partners then. Even if I…”

Even if I want it to be more than that.

I’ve met the girl of my dreams… and I nearly ruined everything.

Is there any way I can get her to see me as more than that? Or are we fated to remain no more than partners?

---

A now de-akumatized Ivan made his way back to class, where Mylene was quick to warmly greet him.

“I’m sorry, Ivan. It’s just one test! And if you want, I’d love to help you with maths.”

“You would? That’s… that’s so wonderful!” Ivan beamed at her words, his joy clear to everyone around. Yet Mylene had more to say.

“But for your own good, you really shouldn’t let Chloe get to you! You’re the kindest person I know and that’s worth so much more.”

“I usually don’t… it’s just that… well…”

Ivan was blushing furiously now as he picked his words.

“I had plans to confess to a girl today and then Chloe just sapped all my confidence.”

“Oh? Who would that be? I-If you don’t mind me asking...”

There was a short pause before Ivan managed to say it.

“It’s you.”

“I was hoping you would say that.” She replied, a wide grin to her face. A moment later, she hugged him tight and his blush deepened by two shades.

“Aww, these two are meant to be together!” Rose said as she dug herself into Juleka’s arm.

---

Marinette smiled as Ivan and Mylene hugged each other, some of their elation sweeping her as well.

Maybe some of our fate lies in the hands of others who love us, that’s not so bad too now is it?

What does fate have in for me?

I seriously hope it’s more of an ‘Adrien’ direction than a ‘Chat Noir’ one!

Chat’s a good partner… and that’s where the line gets drawn.

But Adrien… He’s something special. I got to see a glimpse of a soul so pure.

It’s time for me to take fate into my own hands, and I will.

A girl’s fate.

#miraculous #miraculous ladybug #trans #fanfic #fanfiction #ladybug

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sevensided · 4 years ago

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@stranger-analysis I decided to make a post so I could organise my thoughts better!

A Dream Always the Same is a predestination paradox in two ways: structurally and narratively. As a concept, predestination paradoxes are a recurring theme in the story, as Mike relates it to different issues he’s facing: growing up, his feelings for other boys, and his attraction to Will.

The first mention of the predestination paradox is in Chapter 9:

At the start of the story, part of Mike’s plan to reconnect with Will is to create a new D&D campaign. They decide that their new campaign is going to reimagine Will’s old campaign - the one that Mike and Lucas refused to play, and the one that sparked the fight/fall out between Mike and Will. I decided that Mike and Will would “fix” Will’s campaign together as it represented a mutual desire to get back to where they were, friendship-wise. It was a peace offering they both wanted and accepted. Another reason was that in canon we do not know how or when Mike and Will made up, only that they did by the finale of season three. In other words, the D&D campaign that Will planned (and that Mike attempts to fix) is a predestination paradox in itself, as Mike is “rewriting” the end of the story (the end of the campaign). As Will explains:

A predestination paradox “doesn’t mean the end of the story changes; it just means the way the story is told changes”. As ADATS is set in July-October, my aim was to explain those three months in a way that felt authentic and true to canon. In this sense, the end of season three - with the Byers leaving Hawkins - does not change in ADATS. The final scene in canon and in my fic is still the moving-out scene. But the way that is built up has changed from canon, because ADATS is a “time plug” fic that sought to explain the three month gap in canon. While the start and the end of those three months is the same as in canon, the way I chose to tell that story is different (like Mike rewriting the campaign).

Mike and Will also talk about predestination paradoxes in a more thematic way, as I mentioned before. For instance, Mike thinks about it in terms of growing up and changing:

On the surface it’s about maturing, but in a deeper sense it’s about Mike’s fear of his homosexuality, and his worry that this is not a fleeting phase, but something permanent. Over the course of the story he grows to understand, if not entirely accept, his sexuality, but he struggles with the idea that this could be inherent, natural. In other words, one of Mike’s internal “predestination paradoxes” is the idea that he was born and will always be gay, even if society decries homosexuality as a "choice”. You can also see this when Mike lashes out against his parents, talking about how they pressure him to get married, get a job, have kids, etc. He describes these things as indicative of “normal”, when he doesn’t consider himself “normal” (because he’s gay). In this sense, he thinks about what life might have been like had he and El stayed together, but in liking guys, it’s changed the way his story is told and, therefore, how it might end (with Will).

One of the last references to predestination paradoxes is in Chapter 33, when Mike is confronted by his own inaction when the opportunity to kiss Will arises but he does not take it:

Aside from reflecting on Will’s own words in this section, it’s also where Mike comes to several realisations: that he wants to kiss Will, that he has feelings for Will, and if the opportunity arose again, he would act on his feelings. In this way, Mike’s “predestination paradox” is marred by his own fear and reluctance to damage his friendship with Will. But (as the reader and the writers knows) Mike and Will are destined to be together - his fear is therefore misplaced, although he doesn’t yet know that. In this sense, Chapter 33 and the almost-kiss is a mini predestination paradox: had Mike chosen to overcome his fear and kiss Will, the ending might have been different. As he didn’t do that, they’re left thinking that their respective feelings remain unrequited.

Finally, you can see the reference to predestination paradoxes in the title. I chose to call the fic “A Dream Always the Same” because it implied that this is the fate for both Mike and Will: it is a shared desire, a common dream, that they will be together. Their desire never changes; it is always the same. No matter how their story alters in canon, they will always find each other.

And that’s how ADATS is a predestination paradox! @stranger-analysis

Edit: I also want to add that in Chapter 9, when Mike and Will first discuss predestination paradoxes, Mike’s insistence that the ending might not even change is also reflective of his emerging feelings about other boys. He is, in a way, appealing to Will to give him the answer he knows he should hear (that he’s straight and that’s that) rather than what he is suspecting is true (that he is gay). Just thought I’d pop that in there! Because Mike isn’t always talking about paradoxes in the way that Will thinks they are - for Mike, the concept of destiny also has a much more personal tone to it.

#stranger things meta #st meta #adats #byler fic #*#this is suuuper late and has been in my drafts for way too long

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hogwartsambientfeverdream · 5 years ago

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The story of a flower

H used to hate her freckles. Tiny little specks of colour splattered all over her face an her body. They always reminded her of how much she looks like her dad and not her mom. Her mother have them too, but not like her father. People would call her by her dad’s name when younger for fun, to point out how much they look like each other and how cute this is... She never really blamed or disliked him for that, she just really wanted to look like a different person.

It wasn’t the resemblance that bothered her though... She loves her dad. Besides, calling the kids by their parents names when younger to insinuate how much they look like them was quite frequent in her big family. Both her older cousins had the same fate with their father; But why did it botherd her so much?

Her family is huge. She especially loved the summers because everyone would gather at their grandparents’ for at least 2 weeks. She loved it! Lots of cousins running around playing and screaming. Sure, they were not allowed to use magic but they would secretly hide from the parents and try out some stuff. The older ones would always show them new tricks and especially after starting to join Hogwarts. One time their grandfather caught them and he laughed proudly. She remembers that he started shedding some tears but no one else remembers that... But she could swear she saw it...

She especially loved her older cousin. She loved him maybe as much as her sister. She was his protégée. He would always share secrets with her under the bedsheets long past bed time. He would always tell her the new spells he learned at school and would give her advice for when her time would come. He was the first one to talk to about the houses in Hogwarts. After her sister was sorted in Ravenclaw and her other cousin in Slytherin, she started fearing that she would not be sorted in Gryffindor either. Everyone anticipated for the kids to be sorted in Gryffindor, since there was a huge tradition with Gryffindor in their family. But everything changed with them. And then she started fearing about not sleeping next to her family at night. That Cristmas holiday, she told her cousin about it and that she had it for granted that she would sleep closely to him or her sister so that they could protect her if she had any bad dreams. He laughed in the most sweet way possible and hugged her.

“I’m pretty sure you will be sorted in Gryffindor don’t worry...”, he said

“But how do you know? We said the same for everyone else and now what?”, 10year old H answered.

“The thing is though, that after entering Hogwarts and understanding how things work, I personally never anticipated for them to be sorted in Gryffindor.. I was sad that I would not play Quidditch in the same team as my brother, sure, but he does indeed belong to Slytherin. And the same goes for your sister.. She does indeed belong to Ravenclaw... Even your mom did, i think, but that’s another story. But you are different that them.. You are truly brave.. You haven’t realised it yet but you are...”

She felt better at that time and she slept very well... For once she didn’t have any nightmares that night. But then she started thinking about it... But why? Why was she brave? And how can you tell from an 10 year old kid that they are brave...

The summer before entering Hogwarts she realised what her cousin was talking about. It all came together. Being annoyed by the resemblance to her dad, relatives calling her by his name, the nightmares... And then for the first time, she expressed to her mom something that never made sense to her.

It was around June. Her sister and cousins had not yet come back from Hogwarts. It was Saturday. She remembers because her mom wasn’t at work. She was home cooking, while she was there at the kitchen with her drawing. Her dad was not there... She doesn’t remember why.. Maybe something to do with his job... The sun was very bright and their home was full of light. She, as always, was drawing her mother’s colourful plants.

“Mom, why am I not named after a flower?”, she asked while finishing the small lavenders at her drawing paper.

“What do you mean, sweetheart?”, her mother turned to her quite confused..

“Well, you know... Both Lily and Rose are named after flowers, right? Why not me?”

“Because, you are a bo...”, Hermione stopped her phrase almost scared. But not scared of what H meant, but scared that she would harm her own child... “What do you mean by that, love? James and Albus are not named after flowers...”, she said smiling while she approached her and holded her little hands gently.

“Well, yes I know that... But, I am not like them... I am like Lilly and Rose... I am like my sister, right?”, H answered.

Hermione looked at her child with all the love she has ever felt for anyone and smiled at her.

“Yes love, your are like them”, she said and hugged her.

That night H couldn’t sleep. She got up and left her room. At first she went to Rose’s room and laid down on her bed. She often did this when Rose was away at Hogwarts. Her room calmed her. It was like she was there hugging her and reassuring her that the nightmare was only a bad dream and nothing else. But even then she couldn’t sleep.

She got up again and decided to go to her parents’ room to sleep with them like how she would snuggle in between them when she was a little kid. As she was approaching the room she saw the light turned on and she heard someone crying soflty. When she finally approached the half opened door she saw her mother crying and her dad holding her compassionately.

“It’s ok, we love her and she knows that! Everything will be fine! As long as she has us by her side everything will be fine!”, her dad said

“No, it’s not that easy... You don’t understand! The Wizarding World is sooo closed minded and ignorant! I had to fight for elves rights only recently in the ministry! We had to fight for blood purity only 20years ago Ron! You know I love our world but muggles are far ahead in those things! James and his friends were ridiculed when they joined Wizarding Pride in Hogsmeade! And even that only happened 5 years ago! And let’s not start thinking about the absence of laws relevant to these matters! They will make her life a living hell!”, Hermione said in pure agony still not able to hold her tears...

Ron was looking at her troubled, realizing how true everything that Hermione said was true. Memories of his, words, jokes, weird looks... Everything... The wizarding world was extremely ignorant in those matters... Even he was, before spending time traveling in the muggle world with Hermione. She was right... Things were getting a little better and that’s all thanks to new muggle-born kids entering the community, but still... Maybe for gay people sure, but not for trans... And especially not for trans kids like H.

“What are we going to do?”, he said with a sad face while his eyes were beginning to tear up.

“I trust no one here.. Believe it or not... I am going to London first thing on Monday... I’ll start making calls tomorrow morning in case we know any specialist in London already familliar with our world... If not, then I don’t care even if I am arrested for accidentally revealing myself... Right now we have no time searching if anything like that is possible the magical way... I don’t trust it... I am going back to where I am more familiar with...”, she answerded, and for the first time H saw an unfamiliar determination in her mother’s eyes... Her mother was always driven and vigorous in what she wanted to do, but this time was different. "And it's not just that... We also need to find a way even for us.. For the whole family. We need to talk to your parents, your siblings... Everyone.. This is not going to be easy you know...", she continued.

“I know. I think Rose is already there... Long before H talked... The same goes for James, too. I think the bigger part will be my parents. They will need some time but I think they will understand and accept the situation.”, Ron said and looked at Hermione with love and realisation. “But either way, we will make it! We will make it together, as we always did! And as for the laws you mentioned, that means we have a new fight ahead of us! But we will make it! Things will change no matter what! There are already people out there talking about these matters. Ideas are already been pushed forward... We will help to make the change happen!”, her dad answered equally determined.

She want back to her sister’s bed feeling sad but happy at the same time... Sad because she couldn’t understand what the problem was and because she saw for the first time her mother crying and even almost her dad; but still happy, because she felt more loved than any other day, even though they didn’t tell her anything, they didn’t even realise that she was listening to them. She laid down under her floral sheets and looked outside the window. Hugging her purple teddy bear, she peacefully fall asleep while gazzing at all the hortensias, roses and azaleas on the ledge.

The next few days were busy. Her parents were all over the place and they often called her grandparents to take care of her while away for business. At first they acted a liitle strange for some reason she could not understand... Although she was finally happy to hear them call her H and not by her birth name. After around 10 days or maybe 2 weeks, her mom told her that they would go to London together.

And so they did. She always loved going to the muggle world. Grandpa always talked about how fascinating muggles are, her mom was muggle born and even uncle Harry used to live there when he was younger. Her, James and Lily would have the best time exploring the muggle world.

She was so excited! Her mom said that they would visit a friend of her’s and have a picnic outside in the sun. She wore her favorite pink curduroy trousers which Rose gave her and her favorite little backpack, on which she had embroidered litlle lavenders with her grandma.

The day was amazing and it passed without her realizing it. They had rasberry juice and fruit salad. They discussed a lot of fascinating things and she really liked her mother’s friend. He was a doctor and he was very sweet and funny. He even gave her a little bracelet which he made with seashells that he had gathered from his travels around the mediterranean.

On the way home her mom picked some pretty flowers for her.

“Did you have a good time today?”

“Yeah! It was really nice actually! And your friend was really funny! I really liked him!”, H answered with a calm smile on her face.

“That’s really great to hear, you know. We will be seeing him in the future for quite some time, if that’s ok with you”, Hermione smiled back relieved that she made a good choice. Luna is always trustworthy in those matters.

“So, about the conversation we had earlier... Does that mean I can have a flower name too?”, H turned to her mother full of anticipation.

“Of course! This is the first thing we will take care of!”, Hermione answered happily. “You can pick any name you like, sweetheart! At any time. No rush.”, she said as she caressed her little hand lovingly.

The following September she boarded the Hogwarts Express holding hands with James and Rose. They sat side by side in the cabin with the rest of her cousins and she didn’t even realise when they had arrived. This was the first day that she met so many new people, which she loved because she got to introduce herself with her beautiful flower name.

And then, it was time for the sorting ceremony. She was quite afraid, but then she remembered what James told her last year. Besides, Weasleys nowadays were sorted all over, not ony Gryffindor, which meant that even if she was not sorted where she wanted, she would at least be with family.

“Hortensia Granger-Weasley”, the professor announced and she immediately rushed to the stool while looking at Rose, who was looking at her nearly crying of how proud she was of her little sister.

“Hah! We have the younger Granger-Weasley! Hmmm!!! The decision is quite clear, yees! I think GRYFFINDOR will learn so much from you and your bravery!”, the hat yelled and she ran straight to James’ open arms.

Years later and she eventually came to terms with her freckles. Nowadays she loves the fact that she looks like her dad, whom she objectively finds quite handsome. Nowadays she knows why she hated the freckles in the first place, and the resemblance, and the fact that everyone called her “Little Ron”.

Thanks to her parents and the new found community of people like her, which in a way started considering a second family, though, she can be the girl she is. It wasn’t without struggles, however. It took her parents’ and uncle’s power fuelled by a huge wave of protests of queer wizarding people to pass new bills. And she was lucky that her family is so influential. During the time that her mother was raging in the ministry trying to find files that she could use, she found a lot! Suggestions for equality bills, for gender recognition laws, for abolition of gender dormitories in Hogwarts, complaints of mistreatment of younger queer wizards, accusations of violence and other similar records. Nothing had passed. The wizarding community in the U.K was so conservative in those issues that had even caused individuals or even whole wizarding families to move somewhere else, more friendly and accepting of their loved ones. Even gay people of power (most of them closeted) kept their mouth shut publically so that they would not lose their influence. And that was sad to say the least, her parents thought, especially considering the impact their voice could have in the wizarding community.

The wizarding world was finally changing, but not without important losses. It took so many years but queer wizarding people could finally start to breath more freely. The fight was not over, but at least they had hope. And hope gave them strength to keep on fighting!

P.S.: The idea for a trans character in my fanfiction pieces was formed when J.K.Rowling first retweeted some problematic stuff, back in December. I wanted to right it back then, but hey.. laziness... hehe... I always wanted to implement more queer characters (Adrianne is one) but I never had clear ideas of who and how.

If you think that what i did is offensive to the source material, truly, i don’t care. If you did not like it just leave. This is not the fanfic for you. I am not here to debate trans issues with people who don’t get it. All I want is to celebrate LGBTQIA+ people, and i will be happy to discuss with queer people who have thoughts. 🦋💖

As for the whole J.K.Rowling recent story, i have this to say. The wizarding world does not belong to J.K.Rowling anymore! It belongs to everyone! The Harry Potter universe is so alive because of the fans and no one else! The fans preserve the spark with their art and fanfiction! And this is evident, since no one listens to what Rowling says anymore about the lore! The wizarding world was made quite conservative due to its author but the acceptance, inclusivity and change comes from the fans. We are the ones who wrote fanfics about gay couples and characters of colour, we are the ones that imagined ourselves in the story, not J.K. . Wizarding World is not Rowling’s anymore, it’s ours! So no matter what she says and what she believes we will continue to do what we do best! Expand the boundaries of the consrvative world she had once created and make it fully our own.

Happy Pride Month everyone

Love 💖🧡💛💚💙💜

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aca-awesomenerd · 6 years ago

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Dictionary of bechloe multi-chapter fics

aka the updated/better version of my first fic list

2000 miles

Author : omACAgee

Rising DJ internet sensation Beca Mitchell might so happen to fall in love with a cute, bubbly redhead fan of her's who's the ideal perfect girl. Problem is though, they live on opposite sides of the country with only technology keeping them in contact. Will their relationship last without the physical contact?

After Life

Author : phlesh

What happens if you meet your soulmate after you've already died?

Age Is Just A Number

Author : FluentInMovieQuotes

Beca's heading into her senior year of high school, pining to get herself to LA instead. She meets a redhead the night before school starts and they find out that they have a lot in common with each other. Little did Beca know that the next morning she'd discover that this redhead would be her new English teacher. Someone has it hot for the teacher.

A Ginger A DJ A Wedding

Author : EmilliJayne

Chloe convinces Beca to be her date to her brother's wedding :)

And Everyone Wins

Author : littlepip

Beca and Chloe haven't seen each other since high school. They weren't great friends back then, but that wouldn't be the only thing that's changed.

And I Opened Up My Eyes, I Saw The Sign

Author : dandelion3455

Chloe and Beca have never quite figured out their timing. But what happens when Amy's impending wedding practically forces the two girls together? Basically a slow burn that turns into a volcanic eruption and there's a lot of smut.

Awake and Alive

Author : KissKendrick

Chloe knew before she even saw her, that Beca was the girl she was meant to spend her life with. Beca, was drawn to Chloe, for reasons she didn't understand, nor does she care. But Chloe as well as her best friend Aubrey are not what everyone thinks. They are not regular college students. And an old friend from the past is going to stir up a lot of old feelings, & expose the truth.

Barden Preparatory Academy

Author : swanqueenfic13

This is my Bechloe boarding school AU in which Beca is in denial of her sexuality, Chloe had never considered it before, and Aubrey is gay.

Beca's Fall

Author : MidnightBravery

Beca and Chloe get into a big fight over another girl, resulting in Beca walking out on Chloe. Chloe is crying to Aubrey while Beca is getting drunk with Luke, what happens when Beca realizes that everything is slowly falling apart & Jesse finds her on the rooftop of the Station?

Beca Malfoy and the Room of Requirement

Author : awriterofthings

Chloe Weasley attempts to figure Beca Malfoy out while tutoring her.

Bellas Boot Camp

Author : MoonWriting

Adventures come in all sorts and shapes. Bootcamp with Aubrey is one of them for the Barden Bellas, but while there Beca and Chloe each go through their own emotional adventure in their journey to love.

Belong

Author : MakesGoodChoices

Beca Mitchell is a six time Grammy award winner, but Chloe Beale is never far from her mind. What happens when they meet up again at an engagement party five years later?

Between the Lines

Author : SkySsi

"Be honest, I was nothing but a fucking rebound, am I?" Beca stated more than asking. The question pierced through Chloe's heart. It was enough to break her once again.

Beauty and the Badass

Author : Ibbly5

Beca Mitchell is a badass LA music producer, working as a bartender by night. So what happens when an adorable redhead comes into her life?

Blank Slate

Author : HypersomniacGrad

Everyone would kill for a second chance and that's exactly what Chloe gets when one day, five years later, she gets another chance to tell Beca how she feels. Only... Beca was supposedly long gone and the girl who Chloe meets years later has no idea whatsoever who the redhead was…

Blind Love

Author : acafuckmylife

Chloe's best friend Aubrey is marrying the guy of her dreams; she's the maid of honor of course. Planning the wedding is going to be a lot of work, so when Jesse (Aubrey's future husband) suggests that his best man/Best friend Beca Mitchell helps them, a lot can go wrong. Rated T (possibly M later). Bechloe and Jaubrey.

Burn

Author : idontknowmaybe

Chloe Beale needed a change. So when the perfect job opportunity came up in the same LA suburb that her best friend lived in she couldn't pass it up. Can you find yourself and the one when the town is caught up in a horrible nightmare?

By Your Side

Author : drop-your-worries

Sequel to Someone Like Me, but you do not have to read Someone Like Me to understand.

Chances

Author : Melanocortin1

Beca KNOWS she can be better than Tom, she wouldn't even need a second chance. Everyone else seems to know it, she just has to get Chloe to realize it too.

Club Bellissimo

Author : redchocopanda

Emily Junk, on her last year in Barden, wishes to recruit new talented Bellas, to win the ICCAs again, to enter LA's super exclusive hangout, Club Bellissimo, to have a Bella reunion & most importantly she wishes to see Beca and Chloe finally be together and have gorgeous babies. **CLUB BELLISSIMO is the Dickens' novel Anna K hates and Brittany S would be secretly reading over wine

Company Woman

Author : BeChloeIsLegit

It always seems that Chloe is the one getting married and Beca is left pining over her/cutting off contact. What if this time, Beca is the one getting married (to some woman) and Chloe's the one pining and regretting that she missed her chance?

Counter Attack

Author : AchaeaMG

Beca has a deal with her father. She promised to play on the Barden field hockey team for a year and he would then help her move to LA. Things don't go as expected.

Crashed the Wedding

Author : Britishgal

Chloe finds herself stuck in her hell scenario. The wedding of now five-year-running couple Jesse Swanson and Beca Mitchell. HER Beca Mitchell. Thank god it's only a dress rehearsal because Chloe has to tell her something, before it's too late.

CR's Wedding

Author : Homosexy

The Bellas are performing a set at Cynthia Rose's wedding. Beca's finding it hard to sort out a track list for the mix they'll use, let alone sort out her feelings for a certain redhead. Her confusion leads her to some unconventional advice sources. Will it be the fairy tale ending?

Destiny

Author : KateLides321

Beca Mitchell moves to Atlanta to live with her cousin Jesse. Upon arriving she meets a beautiful girl who's dog named Destiny got loose and ran up to her. Maybe this was meant to be or is destiny playing a cruel trick on her heart.

Dreams

Author : TrulyBeTold

Aubrey and Chloe celebrate the Bellas' win, but Chloe isn't as happy as she thought she would be. And Beca finally got the courage to be with Jesse, so why does she feel like something's missing? And which of our favorite Bellas will help piece the puzzle together?

Dreams Can Come True

Author : FluentInMovieQuotes

Sequel To It’s All About Finding Yourself

Endless Journey

Author : scrappymitchell

Nearly two years after first starting their relationship and a lot had changed for Beca and Chloe as both individuals and as a couple. Beca's career has been taking off hard since she let out her first single and Chloe was working her way up the ladder to be a vet, both having their success bringing some difficulties along the way for them as well as pressures on certain aspects of their relationship.

But given how in love they were, both of them were willing to make some sacrifices to be together.

ERASED

Author : HypersomniacGrad

Beca Mitchell possesses an ability that sends her back in time moments before a life-threatening incident, allowing her to prevent them from happening. When her father is murdered, Beca's ability sends her back 10 years to when she was in high school, giving her the opportunity to prevent a kidnapping incident that took the lives of 3 people she knew, including the girl she liked.

Everything I Never Knew I Wanted

Author : Well Fancy That 13

Beca is one of the world's biggest DJ's and music producers, Chloe is an on-the-rise It-Girl in Hollywood. Beca Mitchell thought she had it all, but then she met Chloe Beale.

Everything You Want

Author : funnyhowthatis

In the morning after the Bellas win the final competition, Beca and Chloe realize that they might not have gotten all that they wanted.

Fallen

Author : Iwentdownwiththeshipbye

Beca has a religious, homophobic father who has been abusive in the past, leading Beca to think she needs to have secret relationships. Only her last relationship ended horribly and she's left to get her frustrations out by womanizing. Until she meets Chloe. Who sees right through her persona.

Familiar Taste Of Poison

Author : danisweetman22

Beca Mitchell was never a normal girl. She had been through so much in her life, more than a soldier, her psychiatrists all used to say. It was only when she arrived at Barden University that things started to change, for the good, and the bad. Trigger Warning: Abuse, Rape, Self Harm, Drug Abuse and Alcoholism.

Favorite Record

Author : bechloehuh/eliseboobman

They have an old beat up Thunderbird convertible, twelve thousand dollars between them, and no destination in mind. This could very much be the worst decision both of them have ever made.

Fire and Fury

Author : OnceYouGoBecYouCantGoBack

She wants to be more than just her client. G!P Beca.

Forgive Me These November Days

Author : obstinate_questionings

Why Chloe Beale didn’t graduate—and why she finally did—as told through yearly celebrations of Thanksgiving.

For Lovers Only

Author : dr_jb5

Takes place two years after the events of Pitch Perfect 3. Beca and Chloe haven’t seen one another since then, each going their separate ways – Beca to music, Chloe to vet school. But, one fateful week, they both end up in Paris ... And when their paths suddenly collide, desire and passion take over as they gain back those missed years and rediscover one another all over again.

Friends don’t

Author : tmylm

“Bec?” Chloe’s voice interrupts her inner monolog, and she finds herself nodding despite the fact that the other girl can’t see her.

“I’m here, Chlo. What is it?”

“Can you stay with me?”

There’s a brief pause as Beca digests the question, mulling it over for a second or two. It seems Chloe can sense her confusion.

“Like, here. On the phone. Just until I fall asleep.”

From more to friends, from friends to more (Those bright blue eyes)

Author : brighteyes29

A Bechloe High school AU. It's a month before the graduation where Beca and Chloe broke-up, although the DJ still tries to get her ex back with some help from her best friend Jesse. But after all, the two girls still love each other. They just have to admit it one more time.

Have A Nice Life

Author : farfrom7

Beca is a little bit broken. Chloe is kind of engaged. Neither of them could be prepared for what happens when their worlds collide.

Hear me chirp

Author : Plush Panda

Chloe wants to know what Beca's favorite animal is, but Beca will have none of that. Supernatural!AU.

Hoofbeat

Author : shadowswillscream

Beca gets sent away to a horse ranch, Hoofbeat, as a last chance due to her recent rebellious behavior. There she meets Chloe Beale, who changes Beca's rule of 'everyone's temporary'.

Hurt

Author : Knope.We.Can

On a night out with Aubrey, Chloe is shocked to discover that the musician they're watching perform is her best friend from high school, Beca Mitchell. While Chloe is desperate to reunite with the one that got away, Beca has her own demons to battle. Trigger warning.

I don't belong to you, and you don't belong to me (I won't let you down, I will not give you up)

Author : IWasMeantToFeel

after their final performance together on the USO tour, Beca sees Chloe kissing Chicago. and she can’t help but hurt.

I Guess I Do

Author : x-backtoblack-x

Chloe's cousin's getting married and she'll be damned if she has to endure another family gathering/speed dating weekend. Cue Beca to begrudgingly save the day.

I Hate How Much I Love You

Author : woahoooyeah

Beca and Chloe have hated each other from the start. The Bella's go to Bora Bora for the summer, to have an adventure at the well-known Resort, Eden. But what happens when Beca and Chloe are forced into situations, that cause them to interact with one another? Will their feels changes towards each other?

I Love You, Awesome Nerd

Author : Olivia Janae

Beca had done her freaking yearly good deed. She had gone to the Bellas reunion...thing...whatever. She had gone and she had accepted the award, she had seen the Bellas; she had even let them stay at her damn condo! So why the hell was that stupid-gorgeous redhead, the one she had run from all of those years ago, back and camped out in her freaking living room refusing to leave?

I'm Only Human

Author : longlivebechloe

AU on what happens after Chicago and Chloe kiss.

I Promise

Author : fugitiveboov43

"I did not forget my promise, I was trying to forget it. There's a difference." Chloe breaks Beca's heart. Thanks to fate and with their small circle of friends, they meet again.

Irresistible

Author : justfunriley

Beca is a werewolf, who was changed by an unknown Alpha. As she struggles with her transformation, Jesse and she start to fight. This leads to them breaking up. Who will be there to pick up the pieces? Her best friend, a beautiful redhead, will be there to pick up the pieces. Werewolf/AU Bechloe fanfiction.

It's A Pirate Life For Me

Author : robind19

the most feared captain and the crown princess. au! Pirate

It's All About Finding Yourself

Author : FluentInMovieQuotes

Beca struggles with school as it is so being forced into the High School's show choir by her Spanish teacher, claiming that it would earn her enough extra credit to pass his class was the last thing on her mind. After they perform at homecoming assembly, a certain redhead joins and her and Beca easily become friends until Beca begins to question her sexuality.

It's Always Been You

Author : AcaTitanium94

Sequel to It’s You

It's You?

Author : AcaTitanium94

Beca & Chloe met when they were both 10'year olds. Beca promised Chloe that one day they would get married. Years later fate brings them back together in the least expected way.

I've Been Bitten

Author : hitandrunn

Spidey!Beca. You expect your senior year in high school to be pretty stressful. Having to worry about college applications, prom and graduation. Beca on the other hand, has to worry about protecting the city when she's bitten by a radioactive spider.

Jesse's Girl

Author : lifeisbechloe

Set after PP2 graduation: The Bellas go out and sing karaoke to celebrate, causing a certain redhead to not-so-subtly hint that she's into a small brunette. Will Beca be able to sort out her feelings for Chloe?

Just A Glance

Author : Bel-Halliwell

It all began with a glance. They didn't know how things would turn up, but there was no stopping it.

Just Like Glass

Author : recallthelove

You see through me, like I'm not there.

La Douleur Exquise

Author : redchocopanda

Stacie believes in the concept of soulmates, of destiny and of true love. Now if only she could get her childhood best friend, Beca, who believes that none of those things are real or last long enough to convince her, to do so too & maybe make her realize that the famous Chloe Beale is the one. Unknowingly, Stacie just might become the reason their two worlds might finally collide.

League of Angels

Author : danisweetman22

Beca Mitchell is the most feared assassin Azrael, the angel of death. She arrives at Barden University under her master, Michael's order. Her new target, Mr James Beale, an important figure in the Government. Beca must collect intel through his daughter, Chloe. However, something about Chloe, unlocks feelings in Beca that she locked away eleven years before.

Leave It All On The Field

Author : second job

Chloe is a senior captain on the soccer team. Beca is the hot new freshman. Follow their relationship on and off the field.

Long Way Round

Author : Smeg699

Nationals is over, a new school year has begun, and Beca is wondering if she didn't make a mistake at Nationals. Rating: Mostly T, a few chapters are M though, and that will be noted in the Author's Note at the beginning.

Lost Stars

Author : BKTheGoldenKnight

Beca, an ex-MotoGP racer, has a tragic past and she had managed to get back on her feet when she met Chloe. However something unexpected happened. Will Beca stay or runaway?

Love Like The Wind Wild, Untamed

Author : jamiexh

Beca's and Chloe's lives are turned upside down when Chloe accidently turns Beca into a werewolf.

Maybe In Another Life

Author : not_so_average_fangirl

Moving into a new house turns out to be a better experience for Chloe Beale than she thought it would. Perhaps it’s because of the friendly, little brunette she finds hiding in the basement one night. An unforeseen friendship sparks between them, but as more complicated emotions begin to arise, a shocking truth is revealed, and Chloe’s world gets turned upside down.

More than Miles (Her name is Beca Mitchell)

Author : SkySsi

A sequel to "Between the Lines"

The story jumps five years after, some tables might have turned. (I still suck at summaries, apparently). So, what happened after five years? What happened after Beca Mitchell had moved to LA? Is Chloe Beale able to get her Beca back? Or is she getting the 'old' Beca this time?

More Than Words

Author : tmylm

“Beca?”

Beca’s brows tug together again. “Uh, yeah? Who’s this?”

The voice on the other end of the phone is both light and cool, it’s almost familiar to her, in fact. She hears a small laugh, and the urge to turn back toward the building strikes her. She looks up to see the figure in the fifth floor window, smile evident on her lips. Her phone is held to her ear too, and she sends a wave down to the shorter girl.

“Just checking you didn’t fake number me,” she says, and Beca swears she sees her shrug her shoulder.

There’s a smile on Beca’s lips in spite of the questioning in her eyes.

“I have no dinner plans yet,” Chloe continues, “Are you free tonight?”

My Little Badass

Author : LexysK23

"I was trying to find something to levitate to show Beca, but I may have done the wrong spell. Bree, I changed my girlfriend into a three year old." Chloe now must take care of her three year old girlfriend until she is able to change her back. How much trouble can the small girl get into? And, oh yeah, it's a three year old half-vampire.

Never Let Me Go

Author : AnnaKendrick11

Beca goes to Barden University and Chloe is a new student. They become friends and get closer, then they both realise that they have feelings for each other but will certain problems overtake their love?

Never Too Late

Author : carma19

Beca’s a 30 something rockstar/producer-turned-filthy rich music mogul. She has everything she’s ever wanted, except for the one that got away.

Nowish

Author : Psy456

Bechloe. Staubrey. Bellas Squared/Stechlobree.

A story in which I created a life I fell in love with and convinced myself by accident that this could work.

Let me try and convince you too.

Now We've Got Bad Blood

Author : tay0720

Fresh off the plane from Seattle, Beca Mitchell heads to Barden University for her first year of college only to find herself falling hard for a junior named Chloe while being roped into a supernatural shitstorm.

Old Love Dies Hard

Author : iwasyounme

It's 6 years after Beca took off from Barden without telling anybody and decided to go to L.A. Chloe is a barmaid in a small bar in the City of Angels too. One night, Beca walks in her bar, but a lot has happened in 6 years and they don't recognize each other. Six years ago, Beca fell in love with Chloe, will it happen again?

One More Year

Author : Knope.We.Can

It's the final year of high school, and Chloe has big plans to go off to college and begin the next stage of her life. Beca just can't wait for the year to be over so she can head to LA. Having spent their time at high school as strangers, Chloe finds herself wondering about the quiet mysterious girl in her English class.

Passing Ships

Author : scrappymitchell

Beca and Chloe have been hiding their feelings from each other for years for their own reasons, but when Beca see's Chloe finally starting to move on in front of her very eyes she realises how she has messed up on the most important thing in her life and now has to deal with going back to New York and living with Chloe, who now has a boyfriend. The question she now asked herself was if this will make her shut her feelings off for good or will it push her over the edge to blurt her feelings out?

Perdition

Author : morningsound15

Perdition, noun: (in Christian theology) a state of eternal punishment and damnation into which a sinful and unpenitent person passes after death. They’ve been doing this for years. It’s almost crazy, how familiar it all is. And every time, their excuses get flimsier and flimsier. Beca still has a boyfriend, Chloe still has to graduate, and yet time and time again they find themselves tangled up together, naked in bed or stuffed into a bathroom stall or sneaking out of a party. And Beca still has a boyfriend, and Chloe knows it’s wrong, but she just can’t seem to stop.

Perfect : A Bechloe Love Story

Author : BechloeGoals4Life

What if Bechloe actually was endgame? This story is what I believe Pitch Perfect would look like if Bechloe was the focus.

Perfect Harmony

Author : BeChloe01

Beca and her father made a deal that if she really gave Barden a shot, he'd fund her move to LA at the end of the school year. She only has a few months left to convince him that she did try. Which means Chloe only has a few months to convince Beca to stay. Slight AU retelling of the movie so that BeChloe are canon.

Pitch Perfect 3 : Bechloe is Legit

Authors : BeChloeisLegit and RJRMovieFan

Pitch Perfect 3 - the movie everyone saw, rewritten to be the movie everyone wishes they made.

Pitch Perfect: Reloaded

Author : Britishgal

Beca finds herself at the mercy of a mysterious gun-for-hire, otherwise known as Chloe Beale, who claims that she needs her dad for his important research. Problem is, she has no idea where her dad could have gone... But at least now Beca has an idea of why he decided to skip dinner with her tonight.

Pitch Perfect 3 - The Aca-Reunion

Author : becca343

After years apart, the Bellas are all coming back to Barden for their 5 year reunion.

PP3 - What really happened

Author : when_you_know_you_know

Not enough Bechloe content in PP3 for your liking? Well here is what REALLY happened on/off screen

Proving Them Right

Author : cheeky_geek_monkey

The Bellas always did joke about Beca and Chloe dating...so is it a moral issue if they pretend to prove them right to make some money at a certain someone's wedding?

Puck me

Author : bardenacapella

College Hockey AU. Beca Mitchell plays on the hockey team for the Barden Bulls. What happen's when Chloe Beale goes to one of her games and their eyes meet?

Roommates

Author : twin192

Beca, 19, a freshman is new at Barden University and meets her new roommate Chloe, 21, also a freshman. They click instantly and become fast friends. But what is Chloe hiding? Why is she crying so often when she thinks nobody's noticing? What did she do for two years before going to college? AU

Shattered

Author : Lackluster Brilliance

Chloe did what she swore she'd never do. She broke Beca's heart, and though it hurts, Beca can never stop loving Chloe. Bechloe angst. Trigger warnings: Rape, self harm, suicide, and alcohol abuse.

she is the flint that sparks the lighter

Author : iPhone

Beca was looking for Chloe after her performance. She'll always be looking for Chloe in some way or another.

aka

Beca moves to LA to work on her new album, Chloe moves to Davis to attend vet school, and they try not to miss each other too much.

Silence Has A Sound

Author : summerreader13

Something has happened to Beca. No one's seen or heard from her in days. Chloe decides to go to her room and find out what's going on. Can she help Beca, or will Beca push her away like she does everyone else?

Skinny Love

Author : writersjoint

One mistake can change your life entirely; and sometimes it can make it all worth it.

Someone Like Me

Author : drop-your-worries

A dangerously fluffy Bechloe fanfic. Prequel to By Your Side.

Something Worth Living For

Author : AnnaKendrick47

Beca Mitchell doesn't have many friends, people in school hate her, teachers despise her attitude, which always seem to get her in trouble. That is until she finds herself wanting to get into one specific teacher's good side.

Sometime You Need Help

Author : Ibbly5

Beca is super guarded, all the time. And Chloe is so drawn to her. But Beca can't possibly let her in, can she? She can't trust anyone ever. Even someone as kind and beautiful as Chloe.

Sparks

Author : Suituuup

Chloe didn't think getting into a car accident would lead to a date. Firefighter!Beca

Stare Into The Sky Until We're Blind

Author : lescousinsdangereux

Chloe Beale has one rule. Just one. Had she known that the odd combination of hair dye, a crappy old convertible, sixty-plus hours of driving, a mix CD, and one Beca Mitchell would lead to her breaking it, she never would have suggested going on this stupid road trip in the first place.

Stay

Author : NotaSoundMind

Beca has had a tragic two years and has given up on surfing because of it, but while taking care of her sick aunt at the woman's beach house, she meets Chloe, an outgoing surfer.

Stolen

Author : thesecretsociety

Beca Mitchell works for her father who leads a criminal group whose latest mission is to retrieve a stolen treasure from a wealthy business tycoon named Clarence Beale.

Strangers

Author : landsliide

A brief encounter with an enchanting stranger changes Beca's life for the better.

Struck by a Feeling

Author : LadyHH

Beca and Chloe lead two different lives at school. Neither noticing the other, that all changes from one moment that will lead them to something they never expected.

Stupid Choices And Second Chances

Author : Biggiewoods

Beca has been helplessly in love with Chloe forever but never had the guts to tell her. After Chloe gets married Beca can't seem to bare it and cuts all ties with the love of her life. What happens after 5 years later when they meet up again. Will Beca finally tell her how she feels? Will it even matter if she does?

Subterfuge

Author : awriterofthings

Chloe develops feelings for Beca, the daughter of a crime boss, while undercover.

Squeeze Once For Yes

Author : Knope.We.Can

Beca finds herself being pulled into a fast friendship with a gorgeous redhead and, for the first time in years, she wishes she hadn't built her protective walls so high.

Tackled

Author : OnceYouGoBecYouCantGoBack

Nine years of ignoring the big elephant in the room. Nine years of bickering like an old married couple. That's all shaken up with an unusual proposal. G!P Beca

Teenage Dream

Author : hedaenerys

Set after the Bellas win the ICCAs. Beca starts getting some confusing feelings for Chloe, and after Aubrey's birthday party- things get a little out of hand…

tell me is it so wrong (even if we fall in love?)

Author : dj jiggle juice

But Chloe’s giving her that giddy grin, the one that tells Beca she’s going to break her facade and burst into laughter at any moment.

Beca thinks this won’t be so bad, fake dating Chloe. Not when everything with Chloe happens with ease.

Tell the World That We Finally Got It All Right

Author : JediFighterPilot2727

Based off of Lily's quote about a time machine in Pitch Perfect 2. A little mix up causes a whole lot of trouble for the Bellas! Especially for Beca and Chloe. Au after the first 2 movies.

Thank God For The Internet

Author : alyssa-gibson

Beca hated when songs got stuck in her head, but she was grateful that one did because if it hadn't, she wouldn't have met the love of her life.

That Thing You Do

Author : thatmitchsentho

What happens after Beca gets everything she thinks she wanted? Life isn't a movie, she soon learns, because you can't fake feeling something that isn't there, and you can't ignore something that is.

This Could be Just Like Heaven (Don't Throw It All Away)

Author : Freerangeegghead

In which Beca Mitchell gets the life she's always dreamed of and more, but realizes maybe it's not all it's cracked up to be.

The Basketcase and The Princess

Author : Fake Shemp

Angsty but Fluffy AU timeline of Pitch Perfect.

The Bridge

Authors : carma19 and Suituuup

In the bustling borough of Brooklyn, Beca’s a struggling musician working as a waitress to make ends meet. At an open mic night, she meets Chloe--a successful local photographer--and sparks fly. As they grow close, Beca learns she left a one night stand the night before she met Chloe with much more than she bargained for…

The Detention Club

Author : ThatWeirdAwkwardKid

High School AU. Basically what happens when you mix drama, mischief, the girls and a night owl of a writer. Just the group making trouble as well as friendships whilst having fun trying to avoid the principal.

The Friend

Author : Secret Heart33

Beca falls in love with her best friend, Chloe, for the first time when she is 12, but things do not go quite as planned. From there Beca learns her role as 'The Friend' and tries to put it all behind her when she moves away. What will happen when they meet again 6 years later at Barden University.

The Last Battle

Author : Jules In Neverland

Two years after leaving the US Air Force, Captain Rebeca Mitchell works for the FBI. With her ex-wife about to marry a man that it's not as perfect as he seems, and a seven year old to take care of, she fights to fulfill her three ultimate missions in life: Make justice after terrible events happened during war. Catch the last bad guy of her career. Gain the love of her life back.

The Lives We Live

Author : AcaTitanium94

Beca and Chloe both live separate lives. Chloe is married to Tom and living in Toronto Canada. What will happen when Tom gets a better job in the US and they move back there? Will her marriage change because of a certain brunette she met a year ago on an airplane?

The Playlist - Volume 1

Author : RedRobin90

Beca Mitchell doesn't want to go to Barden, but once she's met that certain redhead, who doesn't seem to have personal boundaries and always know's how to make her skin tingle, it doesn't seem all that bad.

The Reclusive Music Producer and The Journalist

Author : areaderofmanythings

Chloe is Rolling Stone Magazine's newest intern, she's left Atlanta to start life over in San Francisco. Beca's a cute regular who she befriends at the part time job she has until getting hired on at the magazine. What happens when Beca isn't straightforward about who she is and Chloe refuses to talk about her past? Will Chloe ever get the cover story she's dreamed about for years?

The Sun & The Stars

Author : BardenBellatrix

The Bellas get invited to a resort to celebrate Jessica and Ashley's engagement. Will the girls' relationships have changed since they left Barden?

The Track Star and The Cheerleader

Author : not-so-average-fangirl

High School Junior and Track Star, Beca Mitchell, gets thrown for a loop when her father gets a new job at Barden High School. She's forced to leave her current high school and join Barden just as her Junior year is starting. What could possibly go wrong? Or, after meeting a certain redhead, possibly go right?

The Truth About Reality

Author : sendricamp

Chloe discovers there is more to falling in love with Beca than she originally expected.

The Vigilante

Author : hitandrunn

Sequel to I’ve Been Bitten

The Voice

Author : A Charmed Vampire

Chloe Beale gets the chance to audition on the NBC hit show, The Voice. Desperate to kick start her music career, she wants to get her best chance of winning. Just one little thing standing in her way. Professional DJ, producer and recording artist, Beca Mitchell is one of the coaches. Will her crush on Beca get in the way of her musical dream?

They Shot Me Down But I Won't Fall

Author : beauboss

Beca was in the army and fought in a war till she got shot in her leg and her dad wanted her to come home. As she was still recovering her dad forced her to go to Barden to follow some classes. Beca hates being home but then she meets Chloe. A beautiful red head who she thinks is really pushy and annoying at first... But what happens if her feelings change?

To Leave It All Behind

Author : BIggiewoods

Beca had to leave her perfect life all because her mother had remarried. She had it all. She was on a State Champion Softball Team, had a weekly show on her high school's radio station, and most importantly a future internship at a record label. She thought her junior year would be a bust until a bubbly redhead she will meet would make it all worth it.

Tragedy Strikes When You Least Expect It

Author : Iwillforgetthisl8er

A year after Beca Mitchell stopped talking to the Bellas and Chloe, a tragic accident will pull her back. Rated T for now, may change later. Trigger warnings: Child Abuse and Rape

Two Brides and The Bellas

Author : Gapalkru

A few months after graduation, the Bellas are reunited at Cynthia Rose’s wedding. Someone is a bit too stubborn about a bet, alcohol flows freely, and Amy requires a tuxedo for her iPad. Don’t we all just want to live happily ever after at a wedding?

Under the Mistletoe

Author : not_so_average_fangirl

Takes place a few months before Pitch Perfect 2. Specifically around Christmas time. Beca and Chloe have gotten closer over the years and their friendship has never been better. But what happens when they're forced to kiss under the mistletoe and sparks fly? Will things end well?

Vegan Beca

Author : when_you_know_you_know

That time in Pitch Perfect 3 when Beca became vegan for Chloe…

Vindicated

Author : thesecretsociety

Sequel to Stolen

Waiting At The End Of The Road

Author : HypersomniacGrad

Sequel to What If

We Could Be More

Author : Knope.We.Can

They've been best friends since college. Just Best Friends. No complications, No jealousy over boyfriends, just plain, simple friends. Until, of course, the awkward almost kiss.

What If

Author : HypersomniacGrad

PP2 (sometime before the retreat) but deviates from the story: After living through the worst day of her life, Beca meets an accident and comes face to face with Death. As she ponders on whether or not she still wants to wake up from her coma, she asks herself, what if she never joined the Bellas? If she never existed? If she died? Death takes her on a journey to find out.

What You Do To Me

Author : Olivia_Janae

The thing was...she HAD said ‘I love you’ - and Chloe hadn’t said it back...so now what the hell were they supposed to do? Things were starting to snowball downhill and...Beca just...she didn’t know. How could they stop it? How could they fix it - before it was too late? ...Before they lost so much more than their romance.

Sequel to 'I Love You, Awesome Nerd'

Where Are You?

Author : Knope.We.Can

Beca Mitchell has been missing from Barden for a month. Chloe has spent every single hour she's been gone missing her.

Whispers In The Dark

Author : KissKendrick

Who knew something as simple as a bag being thrown over her head could open so many doors? Doors that Beca wanted to keep shut. Chloe had no idea what she was getting herself into. What she did know? She wasn't backing down. She wasn't leaving Beca, and she wouldn't let the horror of her past hurt her anymore. The problem? Beca may be too far gone to be helped. TRIGGERS INSIDE.

Whoever Fights Monsters

Author : revengeparty

AU. With a serial killer on the loose, the Barden Police Department calls in Special Agent Chloe Beale to assist in the investigation. Detective Beca Mitchell isn't used to sharing her turf with the feds, but they must quickly learn to work together to stop the man only known as the Barden Strangler.

Why You?

Author : selimausx3

Beca was a loner. Ever since Jesse died, she didn’t need anybody. That was until she saved the life of a particular redhead. Chloe stuck around ever since and the brunette didn’t see herself complaining much. Zombie Apocalypse!AU.

Wrong Turn

Author : RunFarAwayWithMe

Beca's dad is eager to find someone who will be a 'good influence' on his alternative daughter, and introduces her to the over-achieving Luke Brandon. As Beca becomes reluctantly intrigued by this seemingly perfect guy, she is introduced to his family and becomes close with his sister, Chloe. She soon realises that Luke is just a wrong turn on her way to true love.

You Never Know How Strong You Are

Author : CrohnieReader

until being strong is the only choice you have. Moving into the Bellas' House in her second year of college should be exciting and fun for Beca, right? But when the thing she's been hiding from everyone since the beginning of freshman year makes a reappearance, bringing with it a great deal of suffering, it makes life a little more complicated.

You're Gonna Miss Me When I'm Gone

Author : WarriorOfTheLight

There is a life-threatening accident after Regionals and it might be too late to undo mistakes…

You're Weird

Author : Saweeet47

Chloe's father doesn't handle her sexuality very well, to the point where he doesn't believe it. Chloe's family assumes she has a girlfriend. She feels the need to hit two birds with one stone, coincidentally Beca is there to save the day.

Your Love Is A Song

Author : HypersomniacGrad

All Beca wanted was to move to LA and make music, that's why she made the deal with her dad in the first place. Make it one year through college then she could move to LA. Thankfully she has her step-brother and a surprisingly amazing roommate to help her bear through it all before she moves on. And then she meets Chloe, and Beca's not quite sure about anything anymore

Your Love Is Killing Me

Author : abnormalhuman

Beca and Chloe become fast friends like predicted, and right from the start there is something more. But how can Beca fall for a girl after being raised by homophobic parents? Beca can't handle or come to terms with herself. Will Chloe be able to help her through it? Trigger Warnings: slight mention of self harm and homophobic assholes doing their asshole thing.

#the update nobody asked for #ii have a google docs if u guys want it for easier access #if u have fics to add to this lemme know #if there is a specific type of list u guys want me to do i'm down #bechloe #bechloe fics #bechloe multichapter fic list #fic list #beca mitchell #chloe beale #pitch perfect

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