#please just respect yourself

[pikp0kcas3]

The Hazbin Hotel fandom’s issue with accepting aromanticism and asexuality

Now that it is officially Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week, I want to talk about this!

I find that, as an aroace myself, I am constantly grasping at good representation and coming up empty— it usually ends up in one of two ways.

One: the character is portrayed as emotionless, cold, and robotic in nature. It’s the question aromantic and/or asexual people are often asked: “Are you heartless?” The answer is no, of course, but general media makes it out to be the opposite.

Or two: Their lack of attraction is seen as something to “fix” because they “haven’t found the right one yet”, and they end up with a partner as a “happy ending”.

It frustrates me greatly because of how little people actually see aromanticism or asexuality as a true part of the LGBTQIA+ community.

So when I watched Hazbin Hotel, and I found out about Alastor being aroace, I was over the moon. I was on cloud nine. I also saw how his voice actor has looked up the term as an attempt to learn about aroaces, which makes me OVERJOYED?? Amir is truly a blessing, and I love that he’s proud to embody a character that’s part of our community. It’s so beautiful to finally have a proper character, a fan favorite at that, who just so happens to be aroace— and that’s another thing I love about this.

It’s never explicitly stated in the show (though it is stated in interviews), but it’s rather clear when you’re watching, isn’t it? Alastor’s aversion to any sort of sexual advancement, coupled with Rosie’s blatant “I know you’re an ace in the hole” comment sort of spell out his asexuality pretty clearly, as well as what side of the spectrum he falls upon. In addition, his Valentine’s day card was strictly platonic, which caters to his aromantic side. It feels so validating to finally be represented, to finally have a character in media who shares the same lack of interest in romance and sex as I do.

When I entered the fandom to look for more content, I kind of expected to see the same respect for Alastor’s orientation there too. But that… wasn’t the case? I am fully aware that aromanticism and asexuality are both spectrums— of course, aromantic and/or asexual people can enter those kinds of relationships. I’m not denying that and they belong in the community as much as anyone else on the spectrum.

But, the more I see the same line again and again and again, the more it feels like an excuse to just ship what you want.

Usually I don’t mind shipping? I’m often a firm believer in people shipping what they like as long as it’s harmless and they don’t go crazy over it. I also know for a fact that Viv doesn’t have a problem with people shipping her characters. They are fictional, after all.

But in this case, people are ignoring the very thing that makes Alastor a part of the aroace community! People are ignoring his lack of romantic or sexual attraction!

Is this not the same as changing a gay character’s orientation to suit a straight ship? If not, how so? I’m told that we are a part of this community, so why aren’t we being treated like it? Why is it so hard to accept the people on the end of the spectrum who aren’t interested?

Something I’ve been noticing throughout my life is that society has not exactly progressed very much on the idea of accepting asexual or aromantic identities. Maybe we have, a little, since the old days— but hell, people in “the old days”, which in truth wasn’t very long ago, believed that asexuality was a medical condition to be “fixed” by taking the right medication or having sex. That’s a pretty low bar to clear. And on the romance side, you’re seen as a “late bloomer” or “boring” if you don’t express interest. These days, being friends with someone is treated like a gateway to them possibly becoming a lover. Not getting married, not going on dates, not wanting a partner— it’s all treated like a crime when it’s not.

Maybe I’m selfish, or sensitive, or I’m butthurt over nothing, or I’m making it all about me. Maybe I’m gatekeeping or whatever the term is. But please, please, please, I just want an aroace character like me who simply is not interested in sex or romance.

And I want fandom to respect that. I admire the creations that fans make— the art, the animatics, the writing and the character analysis. And I want people to keep creating because creation is indeed a beautiful thing.

But I really would like people to treat aroace identities like they’re important. Like it’s more than just a spectrum to get wiggle room to wrangle in another ship.

[beanghostprincess]

i'm aware that due to luffy's more cheerful personality and looks, a lot of people might find it weird to picture him in sexual situations. especially since most of us see him as aroace (as if aroace people couldn't have sex or be in love but, y'know, that's for another time) and it's completely understandable to not feel comfortable around sexual stuff if you don't like it with this specific character. however, being uncomfortable around that type of content and infantilizing luffy's character to the point that you consider it problematic or wrong to put him in romantic/sexual situations is too much and you should let people enjoy characters however the fuck they want. if you don't like something just scroll and ignore it, but don't try to make everyone follow your own moral compass and likes because we're all different and luffy is just a fictional character.

people often forget he's the captain of a pirate crew. he's mature and has critical thinking and if seeing a cheerful/cute character instantly makes you assume he deserves to be "protected" from sex/romance, you are: infantilizing his personality (that may or may not be neurodivergent coded, but that's another story), villainizing sex and romance instead of just seeing those as something you don't personally enjoy but should let other people consume, and using being aroace as a shield from the real world and a stereotype instead of actually being inclusive and truly seeing him as aroaspec. friendly reminder that aroaspec people can have sex and be in romantic relationships because it's a spectrum. that's the whole thing about it. it's understandable to not be comfortable around sexual situations with a character you don't perceive as sexually active, but that doesn't mean it's wrong to write him that way. let people do whatever they want with their idea of luffy and have fun!

[bellaxgiornata]

I'm just making a general statement that isn't meant to come across as rude, aggressive, or to make anyone feel singled out/attacked, but please heed the pronouns someone may have listed on their blog. They're there for a reason.

I know earlier today @souliebird made a brief post announcing their pronouns which have always been listed on their blog. It was never a secret. They were not trying to call anyone out, hurt anyone's feelings, or asking for apologies. It was just a polite request to be referred to properly and a clarification for those who may not have looked at their blog and saw that. It was getting upsetting for them to be misgendered and instead of needing to correct multiple people, they figured they'd make a single post to make it more widely known. It wasn't meant for anything other than that, so please do not feel the need to make apologies or make it anything other than what it was. Some of the attention from a simple ask to have pronouns respected has been overwhelming and not necessarily friendly.

I know this community is full of wonderful people so I'm hoping y'all will be respectful and not rude. We're all here to connect over the same fandom and to have an escape from reality, so please be kind and think before you speak. If you've misgendered someone, just please correct yourself in the future, that's all that is being asked.

Just spread the love instead of the hate, y'all ❤️ And please don't create drama where there isn't any. That's it.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Would you mind if I drew this art in my style? (This is so beautiful, btw, it broke my heart!)

Permission is *always* granted to people wanting to do redraws! I am so touched you liked it enough!

[pickled-flowers]

Also just because you get annoyed by something someone is doing doesn't mean they are evil you can leave us alone

[thepeacefulgarden]

[purpleshadow-star]

People are saying that Noah went through and felt the same things Will did, and that's why his scenes hit different now. I've seen posts saying that he wasn't acting in some scenes and that he really felt the same emotions as Will, or that he was able to give such a raw performance because he felt the same way as Will. I've seen things about how Noah must have felt awful because his character was the target of homophobes, so he felt like they were attacking him, too.

I think people are taking this too far.

Could Noah have felt Will's emotions on a deeper level than we all knew? Sure. But we don't actually know that. At the end of the day, Noah is an actor. He's an actor, reading from a script, playing a fictional character, and he knows that the story is fiction. He also knows that the homophobes in the show are wrong and end up being punished/ shown in a bad light on purpose. Noah is an actor doing a job, and he knows not to internalize the scripts and the words of homobobic characters. He's played multiple roles. Will wasn't his first role. He knows how this works. He knows the homophobia is wrong and incorrect, especially since they make that clear in the show. I doubt he grew up feeling as awful as Will did just because of the words in the scripts (in scenes he wasn't even there for). Please give him more credit than that.

Noah's scenes hit different because now we 100% know that Noah was really able to put himself into Will's mindset. We now know that Noah was really able to imagine himself going through what Will was going through while filming, and he could relate to being closeted and scared to come out as well.

That's all we know.

We don't know anything else. We don't know his experience. It's entirely possible that Noah went through the same feelings and emotions as Will did, that the words from homophobic characters did affect him personally, but until we get a confirmation that that's true (which might never happen, and that's perfectly fine), I think we need to stop assuming we know his experiences while growing up closeted.

So to say, "Noah wasn't acting here," is just wrong because he was acting in every scene. Just because he is able to relate to Will more than we thought doesn't mean he wasn't acting. Until we get confirmation that he wasn't acting (like how he said he wasn't acting in the shoot-out scene and that he was genuinely terrified), let's not assume anything.

Here's what we know: Noah is gay. He was scared to come out. He came out to his family and friends. They said they knew already. They support him. He can relate to Will as far as being gay and scared and his family already knowing.

Until he shares more or clarifies further, that's all we know so far. Let's not assume things he never confirmed about his private life. We're not owed information about his experiences growing up, and we don't have the right to paint a picture about his experiences when we don't know the truth yet.

[hamartia-grander]

I hope I can explain this well. You can "misgender" me (in quotes bc I don't have a gender) if it's funny. Use whatever pronouns whatever adjectives whatever label whatever is funniest in the moment. Tell me to go piss girl or slay queen. Tell me I'm just some guy. Call me a gender vacuum or whatever the fuck just make it funny. I don't want people holding back on a killer joke because the pronouns aren't in my bio, I promise you won't upset me

[dont-offend-the-bees]

Not to continue my recent trend of oversharing on tumblr dot com, but I am very much struggling not to feel like I'm doing everything in my entire life wrong at present

[goldenguillotines]

heyy,, guys I know it sometimes sucks that you don't get the adoptable you want or from the person but going forward can we stop trying to complain about not getting the design to the person who got it instead,, I understand but.. I would prefer not to feel guilty about getting a character that I really wanted.

[metalgeartwo1990]

no but imagine being Freya and having to be civil to the dude that was your abusive ex husbands top advisor right hand arm man silly rabbit, bc one of your only other friends is this huge weirdo freak who will help you nearly unconditionally, but the catch is that the top advisor silly rabbit of your ex is NOW the top advisor right hand arm man silly rabbit semi-single milf in your area of weirdo freak friend. and he knows almost everything about your life except filtered through your ex husband. i'd be mad as hell too

[badaseyebags]

i can’t believe i have to put out such a disclaimer but guys.. please do not lie about your age 😞 it’s for your own protection and respect towards others. if there’s content minors shouldn’t be seeing/interacting with it’s for a good reason. i’m not writing this to make anyone feel bad or guilty, just please respect adults on here posting content for other adults to enjoy and don’t interact with it. if you’re reading it that is your own choice and responsibility, you can do so privately. but don’t interact with blogs with 18+ content. lying about your age doesn’t make it any better just feels even more disrespectful. it’s just a very uncomfortable situation for an adult to be deceived in this way. i’m sure you will understand when you’re older. until then, please respect rules.

[hoshigray]

uh? Gojo doesn’t have sliver hair.

his hair is WHITE

hello again. it's been quite a while since you last did this, huh.

Sorry, this took long to reply to, but here are my responses to your observations (yet again):

1) Yes, Gojo is young (28), and yes, old people have silver hair; HOWEVER, silver is another word to describe the color of "white" outside of plain and snow and so on. I would not like to keep describing Gojo's hair as white and snowy throughout my work because it gets repetitive. Silver is the closest color to white, so I use it.

2) "Gojo has no animal attributes"...Okay??? That's obvious, yes, he's human. I don't quite understand what "animal" attributes you're referring to unless it's like the "growl" or "bark a laugh." To which I say, again, it is another way of speech to describe an action. I don't understand why this bothers you so much as I've never stated in my stories that the characters I'm writing are non-human and have non-human attributes (?) that you're thinking of.

3) What do you gain in sending these asks to me in such a consecutive manner? Like I am fully aware of the characters I'm writing about, I read the material and know what and who we're talking about, and whatever information I'm unfamiliar with can be easily retrieved on the Internet for guidance. If you would have liked to tell me about these things or question why I used them, you could've asked ONCE. Instead, you wasted your time going into my inbox and doing this approach for the second time. And for that, I've warned you once not to do it again and I'm now unhappy I have to tell you again.

Anyway, I will let this slide for the second and final time. Do not explode my inbox with these unnecessary messages; the next time you do will result in a block. I won't even bother replying and just delete the asks.

Have a nice day/night, stay safe, and please don't do this again. ☆

[thepeacefulgarden]

[kaeyx]

NO BC WHY'S THE DEALER FROM BUCKSHOT ROULETTE KINDA.

[mangora]

Ngl people who say “you can’t call ripaxel yuri even if you headcanon ripper as transfem because he’s still a man in the show!” sound kind of…transphobic-ish