#please read the translations for a proper story I skipped over some things

[ridiasfangirlings]

Can you do a summarized version of the K: A Year Later?

You can read all chapters translated here, if you want to get the full story. But if you just need a summary, it's just what it says on the tin: the story of the cast one year after the end of ROK. Each chapter is set up to flow into the next, so usually one character will run into another at the end of their focus chapter and that character will be the focus of the next chapter. The story starts with Kuroh, going over his life at Ashinaka with Shiro and Neko (he helps out at the kendo club and also works at the coffee shop attached to the school). Even with his busy life he still tries to find time to relax and feel the world around him, as Ichigen taught him, and the chapter ends with him meeting Awashima, which is when we learn that Munakata is currently absent.

The second chapter focuses on Awashima, discussing how Munakata basically left on a journey to find himself or whatever and now Awashima's in charge of S4 in his absence. She notices she's gained some weight and tries to quit anko but ultimately a ghost did it (….I'd say it makes sense in context but only in the 'Is Scepter 4 okay' way) so she's good and can once again have anko. She's not the only one giving up things though, as Kusanagi has decided to give up smoking. We get some updates on the Homra alphabet and Kusanagi does his best to function without cigarettes but in the end he has to burn a mud Strain and decides he can keep his cigarettes.

Neko is the one who makes Kusanagi aware of the Strain in his story so the next chapter is hers, showing off her study routine and doing her best. She's made a new friend too, a girl affected by the release of the Slate at the end of ROK, and Neko gets to have cake and study. Eventually there's a knock at the door and Yukari shows up for his chapter, looking for Kuroh. He gets to spend some bonding time with Neko and Shiro before Kuroh comes home and he has some nostalgic feelings about Ichigen too. The chapter ends with Yukari stopping by a liquor store to get some sake and watch the moon, and naturally the store he stops at is the one owned by Kamamoto's family.

Kamamoto's chapter is about his relationship with his childhood friend Ayumi (from Memory of Red and a cameo in Missing Kings). He isn't sure if they're dating or what, but with some advice from Homra he does eventually decide to make their relationship official and even ends up engaged, all while the Homra alphabet (except Chitose, who actually got a girl too) get to be bitter and drink over Kamamoto getting engaged to a girl before them. Speaking of romantic feelings, Yata asks Fushimi on a date asks Fushimi to come over to his place where they play video games and drink cola that they had as kids and spend the night together and it's all very sweet. Afterward Fushimi goes back to S4 and takes care of a Strain situation with perfect skill, because it's the place he belongs after all.

Fushimi's chapter ends with S4 spotting Sukuna on one of their cameras so his chapter is next. Sukuna's living with Yukari and Kotosaka and continuing his training, and one day he runs across his mother. She sees him with a bruise from his training and treats him still like something that was her 'property' so Sukuna fights off her manservant guy and tells her he won't go home with before running off. He happens to spot Anna in her high school uniform and that's our next story about Anna and her new friend Tsubaki. Some bullies who got Red power when the Slate was released try to use Tsubaki to lure Anna somewhere and teach her a lesson, so of course Anna promptly shows up and scares the crap out of them with her King powers. Later she introduces Tsubaki to the Homra guys and they see a huge procession of people coming by, because the King Munakata has returned.

You know how I had some asks about Munakata becoming unintentionally famous in various ways, basically something like that happened and everywhere around the world Munakata went he picked up followers. He ends up in South Africa where he gets a heartfelt letter from Fushimi-kun and decides he must return, bringing his whole entourage along. S4 are all happy to see him and confirm again that Munakata is still their King, and Munakata decides that he is still Munakata Reisi, even without the Slate. He stops by Mihashira, where Shiro's hanging out for our final chapter. Shiro and Munakata have a nice chat (and Shiro says he won't leave the ground anymore because it's not like he said he wouldn't run away a million times in ROK, we've covered this already guys). Shiro stops by both S4 and Homra and then eventually gets to go home with Kuroh and Neko, happily facing the future.

[ranveer--singh]

The nights are tasteless without you: Part 2 ~ Ari Levinson Fic

A/N - This is my first proper multiple chapter story which came to me while watching a Bollywood movie. It is set in Mumbai India where Ari is a professor at a university meets a person of colour - Marathi girl at the train station. There will be other Chris Evans characters as professors and Henry Cavill   characters as professors  

Warning: Please read this before reading the story. 18+, smut, sex… etc

Five days later, Ari started to settle into a routine. He bought a car and learned how to navigate Mumbai's streets with help from GPS. Classes were going well, and students taking a massive interest in Hebrew touched him.

He had finished work early today, and just as he was about to get into the car, his stomach rumbled. Ari hadn't eaten much for lunch as one student needed help. He remembered on his way home, there was a street vendor, and he decided to stop and grab some food.

The street vendor made him a vada pav right in front of him, handing it to him with some napkins. Ari said thank you, paid the man, and sat down on the bench, looking at the busy streets of Mumbai.

Ari suddenly felt the heat and started to cough, his eyes watering, trying to get the vendor to notice his hand asking for a drink. His actions got lost in translation as the vendor came and handed him some hot chai.

He didn't even think and took a few sips of the chai, and it didn't help cool his mouth. It made him swear and put the glass down; he saw a lady laugh at him and then talk to the vendor and bring a cold bottle of thumbs up.

"Here you go, Chai and Vada pav is a great combination but not when your tongue is numb from the spice," she said, looking at his face getting all red and sweaty.

"Well, thanks, I guess," he said, frowning at her, taking a few swigs of the drink. She felt offended; why was he being rude to her?

"Look, I'm sorry for the other day. Mumbai is a big city, and there are a lot of robbers and thieves, and we have to be careful and not trust everyone. My friend lost her watch while helping a guy with directions," she said, her head looking down at the ground.

"Oh no, I didn't know about that. I am new to Mumbai and don't know what's the protocol. I was only trying to be friendly and helpful. I didn't mean to scare you in any way," he said, looking at her soft eyes.

"I was looking for you at the station the last few days and couldn't find you," she said, feeling deflective.

"Oh, about that, I bought a car and am now using that as my transport," he said, seeing her walk away, and it suddenly started to rain, and she was getting soaked. Ari ran over to her and put his jacket over her  

"Let me take you home; it's my way of apologising. Look, I don't want you to catch a cold," he said, walking to the car, hoping she would follow behind.

"It'll ruin your new seats with my wet clothes," she said, looking at her phone to see if it would take her 25 minutes to get home if she started walking now.

"Nonsense, I still have the plastic covers on the seats. The car dealer told me to keep them on so it doesn't ruin the seats. I get it now, you can sit, and I'll take you home," he said, and a small smile appeared on her face. She skipped towards the passenger seat of the car and, buckling up, rubbed her hands as Ari asked for her address and punched it in the GPS.

It was silent for 5 minutes, both awkwardly looking at the road ahead. All you could hear was their breathing and the car engine.  She moved her hand to put on the radio, blushing as she felt Ari's hand touch hers thinking the same thing.

"Umm, sorry, you go," she said as her hand slipped away from the radio.

"No, no, it's ok, you chose a radio station," Ari said and watched as she pressed a few buttons to find the right radio station. A song came on, which made her smile, To Chand Rati. It made her hum the tune, making Ari smile and look at her with fascination.

Halfway through the song, Ari decided it was time to find each other's names. He lowered the volume and looked at her while sitting in traffic.

"We haven't exchanged names; my name is Ari Levinson; you can call me Ari. What is your name," he said, looking at her smile and biting her lip at how hot his voice sounded.

"Nice to meet you, Ari; my name is Maddy Deshpande, but you can call me Maddy," she said, turning up the radio a little more.

"What a lovely name Maddy, so what do you do," he asked, and for the rest of the journey to get to her house, they spoke about their lives, their profession, and what they loved to eat. When they arrived at her apartment, before leaving, they exchanged numbers, and she offered to be his tour guide.

[twilightmalachite]

Christmas Live - Line to Line 3

Author: Akira

Characters: Hinata, Yuuta Chiaki, Tetora, Midori

Translator: 310mc

JP Proofer: Mika Enstars

EN Proofer: ryuseipuka

"Taichou-dono~ What exactly is this “Eve’s Eve Live”? The name has an oddly nice ring to it~…?"

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Season: Winter

Location: Park’s Live Stage

Hinata: … …

Yuuta: … …

Chiaki: Ah~ Ahem! I’d like someone to explain to me what’s going on, so that I can understand!

So, ermm, what’s the situation? Those two are from 2wink, right?

They always looked to be getting along, so why would they be fighting now? Nagumo, Sengoku, please explain it to me!

When I tried contacting you guys, you were gasping for breath asking for help, so I rushed over as fast as I could…

But I can’t really intervene if I don’t know what’s going on, y’know?

I feel a little proud of you all for relying on me, though! You can all rest easy now that the burning heart Morisawa Chiaki is here! ☆

Tetora: Please keep quiet, Taichou. Anzu-Anego is sorting out the situation by asking everyone for their part of the story right now.

Please don’t get in her way by causing a ruckus.

The one we called for help was Anzu-Anego when it comes down to it… You’re somethin’ like an extra here, so I’d like it if you stepped back a bit.

Chiaki: M-Mm. Nagumo’s attitude towards me just gets drier and drier, huh…

In that case, I leave this all to you, Anzu. We’ve got our own side of things to prepare, mainly for the Eve’s Eve Live.

Shinobu: Taichou-dono~ What exactly is this “Eve’s Eve Live”? The name has an oddly nice ring to it~…?[1]

Chiaki: Mm. It’s a job; we’ll be performing a live show on a stage set up in this park.

It seems that some of our unitmates are likely to behave irresponsibly when left to their own devices, so… I asked Anzu if there’s any suitable work we could take on.

Anzu actually appears to be on break, too… But she still went around all over the place and searched for a job suitable for RYUSEITAI.

That’s when she found this one. They were just about to consider canceling the live show because another unit, who’d been scheduled to perform in the live, announced that they would not be able to participate, after all…

It turns out, that unit has a member who caught a cold.[2]

So we’re acting as their substitutes. You guys should maintain good care of your health too, alright?

Anyway, that job is known as the “Eve’s Eve Live”.

It’s apparently a live show intended to celebrate the upcoming StarFes, as well as advertise for it.[3]

The goal is to attract an audience and promote StarFes.

Shinobu: Hmm~ So it’s like an opening act for StarFes? By the way, are we RYUSEITAI not participating in StarFes itself?

Chiaki: Ah, no, all units are meant to perform there. So of course, that means we’ll also participate.

But the main performers will be a different unit, and for the most part, we plan to put on our usual performance there.

That being said, the Eve’s Eve Live will act as a good rehearsal for that, won’t it?

Our schedule was getting jam-packed with things to do as of late, though…

So if it were possible, I wanted to give you all a proper break, but… Well, I’m sure it’ll be alright. We’re all still young, after all! ♪

But today was actually meant to be a day off from RYUSEITAI activities, specifically… so you don’t have to force yourselves to join the live show, okay?

Midori: Ahh, then I’d like to skip out on this… It’s cold anyway, I wanna go home and sleep…

Tetora: C’mon, don’t say that! You’ll join us too, Midori-kun. The five of us together are RYUSEITAI! We’ve even got just the right outfits for this, too~♪

Chiaki: Ooh, what’re those costumes? Eve’s Eve Live was a sudden job, so I didn’t really have the time to prepare everything.

I was actually planning to perform with our usual RYUSEITAI uniforms, but this might change things…?

Tetora: Heh-heh. Y’see, Taisho made some outfits for Hinata-kun. Except, he made waaay too many after getting a li’l too into it, apparently…

Do you think we could use these outfits for the performance?

Chiaki: Hm, they’re Santa outfits, perfect for the occasion! If we ask Anzu to tailor it to our sizes, it should be usable! Wonderful work, Nagumo! ♪

Tetora: It’s actually all thanks to Taisho. I didn’t really do anything. There’s a variety of colors and sizes here, so I think there should be an outfit that each of us can wear~?

[ ☆ ]

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In Japanese, the name is ibu-ibu-raibu, each word ending with bu, hence Shinobu’s comment on it.

This is referring to Valkyrie. You can learn more about this in Star Festival, Holy Knights 2 and 3. Please check this masterlist for a translation.

As mentioned in a previous chapter, StarFes is a DreamFes that happens on Christmas.

[apompkwrites]

reader impact || first meetings: unreconciled stars

series masterlist characters: scaramouche, fischl, mona genre: fluff summary: a game has been released entitled genshin impact, consisting of otherworldly abilities relying on the basic elements of nature. the game follows the story of an interdimensional traveling twin in search of their other half. along this journey, they meet different characters that live in this world. including you. notes: i'm sorry fischl and mona's aren't that good :(( this is actually my first time writing for them but i hope you enjoy <33

scaramouche's playthrough -

oof scara

scara scara scara

this boy hates his chat and at this point they don't care.

it's not like he'll badmouth them, right?

think ludwig.

that's him.

he's a very angy boy please--

as for what he does?

much like childe he'd do a lot of pvp games.

he's not too keen on showing off his personal life.

he prefers that boundary between his viewers and himself, y'know?

he honestly doesn't even understand why his viewers like him.

he knows he's a mean person and yet here they are :/

he doesn't take requests from his viewers he just kinda plays whatever he wants.

imagine his viewers' surprise when they see him streaming genshin--

they asked why a lot.

"it seemed cool."

this man just wants to play some good ol' anime games.

his chat calls him soft and he just glares.

anyway now he's actually playing.

he's not really into mondstadt's characters they're all... okay to him.

he feels a bit better in liyue.

not because it's pretty oh no no no.

because look at all the enemies outside >:))

he'll clear the whole field don't test him.

anyway, now onto the unreconciled stars event :00

this man really doesn't like katheryne--

anyway at this point he's tasked with find fritz, which he doesn't really want to do.

he sees the dude on the ground but that's only after he sees someone standing next to him.

and then he sees someone standing next to him :0

"is the guy on the floor sleeping?"

"i believe so. i've tried everything, but he won't wake up."

he will pause to look at your outfit.

it's so complex but it's so cool!!!

his chat suspects something's up but... he'll just snap at them like he normally does.

but he'll silently admire you <3

also yOU'RE T I N Y ! !

and then paimon points out your clothes and the cameras pans up your body--

"heh... and by "this person over here," you mean me, right?"

he will choose the "those unique clothes are quite beautiful" option in a heartbeat.

he doesn't care that his chat is teasing him, he just wants you to know :))

he's kinda sad when you leave, though...

"please come back soon..."

his CHAT HAS NEVER SEEN HIM SO SOFT BEFORE

skip to a few events later when the constellation is revealed to be leonard's.

the sudden cutscene catches him off guard because he's prepared to fight someone.

"hi! sounds interesting... mind if i join you?"

he won't say anything but he will physically relax at the sight of you.

you make this man soft please--

he's lowkey angry when his character is teleported away from you :(

(name): the sixth of the eleven fatui harbingers

HYPEHYPEHYPE

YOU'RE SO COOL!

of course he doesn't say that but his chat can tell that's what he's thinking.

this man's eyes go wide when you order the fatui around.

please help he really likes you. you're so assertive and cute and cool and just AGH--

fischl's playthrough -

fischl can and will do cosplay streams.

her fans like to watch her because of the "character" she puts up for the camera.

honestly she just does this because she genuinely enjoys cosplaying and bringing characters to life.

oz is the nickname for her pet bird :))

she definitely gets a lot of trolls in her chat that make fun of her for her cosplays and "dumb" way of speaking.

in which case she'll just yell at them using her "dumb" way of speaking.

she really does care about how people see her but her chat comforts her a lot after, so she feels better after a few minutes :))

the games she plays are very fantasy based and take place in worlds that don't exist.

once she gets into a game, she'd pick her favorite character and cosplay as them everytime she streams that game.

sometimes she does sewing streams where she actually makes her own cosplay with her fans.

they like to make it with her if they have the materials :D

genshin impact was a game her fans recommended because they actually want to see fischl cosplay the characters.

they will beg her to do the cosplay creation on stream.

(they defintitely know who she'll choose to cosplay but it's fine)

when she reaches the unreconciled stars event, she's really excited to learn about the fated meteorite granting sleep upon touch.

she's ready to go around teyvat in search of an answer when...

"katheryne! vassal of the immernachtreich, do mine ears deceive me, or didst thou cry out mine holy name in earnest supplication not one moment ago?"

some of her chat is obviously confused by your speech but her long time viewers can understand some of it.

oz, who fischl had brought with her to play, seems excited to see your familiar flying to you :)

fischl is just as excited as he is!!

please you speak just like her and you're voice is so nice and it actually sounds like the developers put thought into what the speech would mean in "proper speech."

"a pleasure to meet you again, katheryne."

YOU'RE FAMILIAR IS JUST AS COOL AS YOU ARE!!

some of her viewers will beg for her to skip through your dialogue.

when she sees those comments, she will purposefully let your dialogue play out, proceed to read out that same dialogue, and respond to you as if she was actually talking to you.

not just to spite them but because it's also a lot of fun for her <3

"it would seem the gods have blessed us with meeting such a well-respected being!"

translation: she's really excited to have met you.

as soon as you spoke she decided she would cosplay as you.

she's already planning out all of the materials she'll need and how much time it would take.

if your familiar is a bird, you best bet oz will be in her photo shoots for your cosplay.

most of the time you're on screen, she'll talk to her viewers about you in her classic chuunibyou style <333

she's really sad when it's time for you to leave :(((

"... goodbye, fischl. you are a good listener. i enjoy chatting with you. to be honest, most of the other adventurers in the guild only ever talk to me when they wanna hear (familiar)'s reconnaissance reports... this little journey we had... it was a great adventure. i'm just sorry that is has to end so abruptly..."

she might cry wait--

she relates to you even more now :(

"ah! what am i doing? i totally broke form..."

you're too cute pleas--

mona's playthrough -

mona does a lot of nightly streams.

it's very rare for you to catch her streaming with daylight.

she likes to share things about astrology while sitting outside drinking something warm.

she'll do a lot of nightly gaming streams as well.

mainly calmer games that people can vibe to in the background.

she prefers to keep her streams lowkey and chill, much like the life she wants to lead.

if only she had the money to do so...

yes, mona is still struggling with money even as a streamer.

she greatly appreciates any donations her fans give to her because she practically relies on them to pay her rent and daily necessities.

of course, it's not like she's completely struggling, just enough to barely get her by.

anyway, her fans ask her about playing genshin impact, inticing her with their talk about the stars and night sky in the game.

she's the type of player to take her time in the environment and take a lot of pictures of her character at night.

she's actually really excited when she hears about this new event centering around the stars and sky :D

soon enough, she gets around to the part where she is need of an astrologist.

she's HYPED to hear there's an astrologist in the game.

"someone looking for me? who is it?"

she will squeal, please.

look at you!!!

your whole design has stars and is space-themed and you're so cute and you're voice is so soothing ! ! !

she really likes listening to you talk about astrology because your voice gets even softer than before.

that scene where you go to the cliff??

please she has that scene as her lockscreen <3

you just look so cool when you start to do your process.

you're so focused and the way they animate your process in the game is beautiful.

and then the fatui harbinger interrupts one of your meetings :00

you grab onto mona's character and teleport away in a cloud of stars and specks of your elemental vision.

she's kinda embarrassed when you scold her about getting involved with the harbinger--

but not only are you really cool and awesome, you're super strong, too!

please be sassy more she really likes how proud you sound :))

[yami-kada]

Mission 2

Recently I read a fanfic on AO3 called Interlude - Class 1-A by @itslivybear and was inspired a bit to write a fic based on that! Well really I got inspiration for a single line (you'll know it when you see it) and then had to write a whole thing to be able to share that one line, but oh well. This is my first time writing a chatfic or even any BNHA content at all, so I hope it doesn't suck! Thanks to @shadesofflame for being an awesome beta!

(Quick FYI in this AU M*neta and Bakugou are replaced with Shinsou and Monoma, sorry for any confusion. Also a name guide can be found at the bottom.)

RockSolid: Um, so.

RockSolid: Remember the missions during the Sports Festival?

PurpleGrape: Oh hell yeah.

PurpleGrape: Still cherish the look on that bastard's face.

Spoderman: jehxgjc Kiri I got it on video!!!

JazzHands: You've had video of the capture of the bounty this whole time and never showed us???

LSD: I thought we were friends Sero!

Spoderman: omg no not that I totally would have shared earlier if i did

Spoderman: im talking about That.

RockSolid: no Sero don't tell them!

RockSolid: it's embarrassing!

PikaCHU: Tell us, tell us!

NYOOM: Kaminari-kun! If Kirishima-kun wishes to keep his privacy, then it is our duty as his classmates to respect that!

Spoderman: ok but consider: he already gave them a major hint and they are about to POUNCE

BreadIsPain: As a witness as well, I must say that Kirishima was si attirant que j'ai failli m'évanouir~*

RockSolid: thanks, I think?

MOMo: To paraphrase Aoyama, he is essentially saying you were very manly, Kirishima!

RockSolid: aw thanks bro!! Don't believe you but thanks!

Spoderman: you take that lack of confidence back I have evidence right here that says you are super fucking manly!

LSD: ok please now we have to know so that we can show Kiri how great he is!!!

MOMo: I must admit that the commentary seen thus far has me rather curious as well.

RockSolid: You guys…

RockSolid: alright then, I'll tell you!

Spoderman: sweet ill pull it up!

RockSolid: bro don't you dare! my story, I get to tell it!

Spoderman: oh yeah of course bro!!

Spoderman: but if after you wanna show it then i am READY.

JazzHands: This is very sweet and all but I am very thirsty for this TEA.

RockSolid: on it!

Kirby: Kiri you've been typing for so long that I'm getting Izuku vibes here.

GreenGrape: Hey!

RockSolid: sorry! this is harder than I thought!

Spoderman: want me to start it off?

RockSolid: you know what, sure.

Spoderman: aight so,

Spoderman: Council, what qualifies as capturing the bounty?

GreenGrape: Guys no the bounty is over please no more bounty-hunting Kacchan.

MOMo: Your objection is noted and overruled, Izuku.

MOMo: For your question, Sero, I do not believe we ever set specific limitations on what qualified, but I was under the impression that it was limited to the Sports Festival. Why do you ask?

Spoderman: just double checking

Spoderman: because my bro here just totally shot both missions out of the park!!!

LSD: gaSP!!!

JazzHands: bOTH?!

RockSolid: no not both!! we have no confirmation for either, technically!

Kirby: Technically? What do you mean by that?

RockSolid: ahhhh ok so Sero and I were eating lunch in the courtyard because it was nice out, right?!

RockSolid: and we were chillin, being bros, birds were singing, all was good.

RockSolid: and then we heard a small explosion before the bounty walked in at the other end of the courtyard and started kicking at the wall.

PikaCHU: omg so angy.

RockSolid: and like fine, we can tune him out, just try to act like he's not there, you know?

RockSolid: But then he started yelling at random people in the courtyard, just acting pissed as hell.

PikaCHU: oMG so ANGY.

RockSolid: and that's just not manly at all, you know? going off on people like that just because you're in a bad mood.

GreenGrape: Yeah… that's Kacchan for you.

RockSolid: so he's making his way around the courtyard now, like everyone needs their daily dose of asshole for him to be happy, and the closer he got the more annoyed I got.

Spoderman: here it comes!

RockSolid: and eventually I get up, because I have had just about enough, and walk right up to him.

RockSolid: he doesn't see me coming, because he was too busy yelling at some girl, and I get right up behind him.

RockSolid: and then I just called out to get his attention, and spun him to face me while making sure I end up between him and the girl.

RockSolid: and well I told him off a little bit and got him to back off then left in a hurry.

RockSolid: and that's it!

Spoderman: oh no you don't

BreadIsPain: Oui! Monsieur Kirishima, you must tell the climax with just as much zest as the build-up!

Spoderman: what he said! no skipping out on the best part!

RockSolid: but!!!

Jacked: No buts, mister. We're all way too invested now for you to back down.

RockSolid: :(

RockSolid: fine! you win!

RockSolid: so uh when I got his attention, I also got my hand onto his shoulder, and used his surprise to knock his feet a bit off balance and pulled him back, but then I ended up with him in my arms and could tell he was about to start yelling so I just…

RockSolid: you know…

RockSolid: flirted?

LSD: oh my GoD this is great!!!

PikaCHU: Hell yeah Kiri! Go get yourself a manz!

RockSolid: I'm not getting a man! He's probably going to kill me the next time he sees me!

Spoderman: i dunno, it took him a good long while to reboot after what you said there

Spoderman: you might have a shot

PurpleGrape: Well if you're not going to get a man out of this, mind telling us what you said so I can bait him next time he tries to be an ass?

RockSolid: uhhh…

RockSolid: I'm nervous.

BreadIsPain: If you will allow me, I shall finish your tale off dazzlingly!

RockSolid: Thanks Aoyama.

BreadIsPain: Bien entendu!

BreadIsPain: While holding him in his arms tightly in a dip, faces inches apart, Monsieur Kirishima leaned impossibly closer to emphasize his point.

RockSolid: oh god I regret everything.

LSD: Hush, it's getting good!

BreadIsPain: With a growl to his voice and his eyes burning above a smirk, he said "You know, you're damn cute when you're angry, but you'd be downright sexy if you shut the fuck up." Then he straightened up to fling the lost soul to the side, and saunter off like the devil was guarding his back, leaving the bounty terribly confused in his wake.

PurpleGrape: Whoa.

PikaCHU: Holy shit?!

RockSolid: what is that description?!?!?!

JazzHands: Kiri that was PERFECT oh my god?!

LSD: It's ART is what it is!

Spoderman: don't forget how red the guy was! Kiri was cool as a cucumber but the other guy couldn't stop blushing after seeing his face!!!

MOMo pinned a message

RockSolid: Yaomomo!!!

MOMo: My apologies, Kirishima, but I felt it only right to ensure easy access to your most manly moment.

LSD: Yeah Kiri! Then one day we can all look back on this and celebrate how everything started!!

RockSolid: How what started???

LSD: E v e r y t h i n g

RockSolid: @Spoderman bro hide me I’m scared.

Spoderman: hey guys, wanna see a GREAT video?

Spoderman: the stars are our main man, Kiri, and the bounty!

PikaCHU: hell yeah!!!

Jacked: Lay it on me.

PurpleGrape: Sure.

JazzHands: Do you really have to ask????

RockSolid: but I already told you what happened!

RockSolid: why do you want to see me being so embarrassing?

PikaCHU: bro we all appreciate you so much of course we want to see you being manly!

LSD: Just from what you all said there is no way you don’t look great in that vid, Kiri!

PikaCHU: gotta give support where support is due!!

PurpleGrape: They’ll all bully Sero into showing them one way or another anyways, might as well give in now.

RockSolid: but...

BreadIsPain: Nous devons vous montrer à quel point vous brillez et dissiper ces pensées douteuses!**

MOMo: I could not have said it better myself, Aoyama!

RockSolid: I don’t even know what he said though?!?!?!?!?!?!

Spoderman: Kiri.

Spoderman: Bro.

Jacked: Well shoot he’s using proper grammar and everything.

Spoderman: Rude.

Spoderman: Anyways Bro.

RockSolid: yeah?

Spoderman: You are epic. This video shows you being epic. And putting an asshole in their place.

Spoderman: You have nothing to be ashamed of, and every reason to be proud. So please let me show the video so that everyone can appreciate you like you deserve bro.

RockSolid: bro…

Spoderman: Bro.

RockSolid: bro -

Spoderman: Bro?

RockSolid: bro!

Spoderman: aight everyone down to the common room its up on the big screen

Spoderman: i have popcorn too

Jacked: Not even gonna question that.

LSD: Finally!!!

JazzHands: Yuss!!!

BreadIsPain: Je vais regarder avec enthousiasme!***

MOMo: As will all of us I’m sure, Aoyama!

RockSolid: Thanks guys!

RockSolid: Now get down here and watch me maybe get a man!

Translations:

*so attractive that I almost swooned.

**We must show you how much you shine, and dispel those self-doubting thoughts!

***I shall excitedly watch!

Guide to names:

GreenGrape - Izuku

PurpleGrape - Hitoshi

CopyCat - Monoma Neito

MOMo - Yaoyorozu Momo

datBoi - Asui Tsuyu

JazzHands - Hagakure Toru

NYOOM - Iida Tenya

SnowWhite - Kouda Kouji

LifeIsPain - Tokoyami Fumikage

BreadIsPain - Aoyama Yuga

Kirby - Uraraka Ochaco

LSD - Ashido Mina

PikaCHU - Kaminari Denki

RockSolid - Kirishima Eijiro

RipHarambe - Ojiro Mashirao

IcyHot - Todoroki Shoto

MuffinMan - Sato Rikido

Octodad - Shouji Mezou

Jacked - Jirou Kyoka

Spoderman - Sero Hanta

[shinymixedbag]

So. About Given.

My social battery is constantly running on fumes. Hence the long periods of absence from tumblr ♥

I tried to ignore it but I heard seriously disturbing stuff about people warping the story however they see fit since the release of volume 4 in English... and fighting and spreading lies... :| 

Yes, I’m gonna talk about the controversial chapter 20 of Given -.- 

Honestly it’s sad that I even have to do this but things are getting out of hand I hear. Reading some stuff, it felt like being asked in sugar-coated words, to apologize for fucking up the translation -.- Hate it to break it to you, but the fantrans is more accurate ♥

I ask my followers to please help spread the word and get people to stop spreading lies, hate and misinformation. But please DO NOT land yourselves in trouble. You don’t owe it to anyone to change their mind. Put the facts out there. Whether they take it or not, it’s entirely up to them. 

And do not take my words out of context, please.

In this first part, I’ll just talk about stuff. In part 2, I’ll explain the literal translations of the few “problematic” pages... and in part 3… well, even if you skip one and two, make sure you read part 3.

I had high hopes for the official translations by Sublime, but they’ve taken so many liberties and hasn’t really stuck to what Sensei’s written. It’s not all bad, but not great either.. It’s a shame because it takes away a lot from what’s being said. (I’ll include examples.) BUT, it’s not unexpected, nor is it a huge offence, because when a company licenses a manga, I hear the translators don’t get to choose which projects they work on? So to them, this is a JOB with HARD DEADLINES. In the case of Given, that’s translating, editing and printing an entire volume in less than 8 weeks. That’s not an awful lot of time. 

Scanlation teams however, specifically choose the projects they work on and any decent scanlation team will INSIST on not diverging too much from the source material. (Meaning; most teams absolutely love the projects they work on, and think it’s disrespectful to change what the author has written.) Fan translators can be strict that way. I for one am loath to change dialogues, and prefer to do literal translations. So, you can be sure that most of the time, fan translations of any manga worked on by a decent scan team WILL be more accurate ^^ (or you can say, closer to the original) Folks seem to be under the mistaken impression that official=100% perfect. It isn’t... More often than not, it’ll have at least slightly skewed what’s actually being said. They are more concerned with deadlines and presenting a story in proper English(or whichever target language) This is common knowledge. Thought people knew??

If you didn’t, well now you do.

From experience, scanlating Given involves a lot of brainstorming and throwing ideas about. It’s crucial to make sure what sensei intended is not twisted. To phrase text in a way that wouldn’t cause misunderstandings :| ...THE IRONY.

Enough with the trashing on fan translations. Nobody begged you to read it?? Thanks are not needed but have the decency to not crap all over it. If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything?  If it doesn’t serve the purpose of meeting your own personal agenda, DON’T READ IT. Regardless of the issue with accuracy of official translations, if you want to use that as gospel, by all means, feel free to do so. 

As I understand, the problem here is that a group of people want to show that Akihiko is not “wrong” or “bad” or a “rapist”? While the intentions are good, the way they’ve gone about trying to achieve it, is not... Starting a war online? FR..?? You might only want to prove you are “correct” and the others are “wrong”... But yelling and shit-talking is not gonna help your cause.

Those of you who think Haruki was okay with what happened...... Smh.

And those of you who think Akihiko is a rapist... please use a dictionary. Learn the difference between rape and assault. While they’re used interchangeably, rape is rape, and sexual assault can be violence of a sexual nature... being forcibly kissed against his will, having his pants pulled down and sucked off—counts as sexual assault.

Sorry, I am a little annoyed. I’m here to explain. So I’ll get on with that... in part 2 of my post.

[magicalgirlsandcerulean]

Ep. 10's blog post

This blog post, with Hori's second entrance, is dated 15th June 2021. Spoilers below, as always!

Notes before we begin:

For those of you who didn't check out ep. 9's blog post, see tweet 2 on that for more info about one of the characters of the day.

Due to the unintended delay on this post, I've tried to translate more completely than usual and that caused the release of this post to be postponed by another day...Sorry. Even still, consult the actual post for proper placement of emojis, coloured text etc.

This time, just for efficiency's sake, I skipped a lot of the honorifics because Hori refers to Takara, Tina and Tsumahara as -san. I've only left it in for "Balle-san" (a one-off) and when other people refer to Hori as "Hori-san" (as opposed to when Hori calls himself "Hori" with no honorific).

Also, an advance note that you'll probably want to cry when Hori pulls out the crying kaomoji. (I wanted to cry at two points when he did, at least.)

CR translations were used where I could chase them up.

Post title: バリバリのバリの禁忌其の拾���

The Very Vigorous Taboo No. Ten! [T/N: バリバリのバリ (baribari no bari) has some obvious repetition in Japanese, so I had to try convey that in English as well, even though small!Takara is more "working hard" than "vigorous". The final "bari" is a Hakata dialect thing - we already know Hori is from Fukuoka, so that fits. I had to translate the title because this phrase appears later on.]

皆様、お世話になっております。

Everyone, thank you for taking care of me. Fairy蘭丸〜あなたの心お助けします〜で雅楽代 寶 を演じております、堀 曜宏と申します。

I am called Akihiro Hori, who voices Takara Utashiro in Fairy Ranmaru ~We Will Help Your Heart~. 又の名をジャガイモ堀堀です、本日は何卒よろしくお願いします。

Also known as "Potato Digging Hori", please kindly take care of me today. [T/N: "Potato digging" = jagaimo hori, so "potato digging Hori" = jagaimo hori Hori. It also makes reference to the ep. where the kids dug up potatoes.] 禁忌其の拾『快楽』熱かったですね！！！

Episode 10, "Hedonism", was passionate, wasn't it?!!! 今回は寶さんの二回目のお当番回ということで、本編を見返しながら楽しめるような感想を主観ですが、勢いと共に書かせて頂きたいと思います。

This time was Takara's second focus episode. Although we see [elements] that recur from the original story [ep. 5], the impressions we are able to enjoy are subjective and so I will write with fervour. 開幕は女王チームとの密談からSTART!!

We START by opening the curtain on the queen team's private talk!! [T/N: "Queen team" = Queen + Houjou (+ sloth).] シリウスについて女王からせっつかれている寶さん。

The Queen is pestering Takara about Sirius. 座長…誰の台詞が麩菓子じゃい！！！！

Leader...whose lines are fugashi!!!! [T/N: Fugashi are a type of Japanese sweet. There are sweet potato fugashi, so I assume this is either a typo or a pun on a similar word. If it's a pun, the word is likely to be おかしい (strange, suspicious, unbecoming).] [T/N 2: The line below suggests "leader" (zachou) = Ranmaru, so this sentence would be referring to Sakata.] でも生配信で話している時の堀からは想像できないと思いますが…実は普段の堀は、どうやら寶さんの女王様に対する話し方くらいのらりくらりでみんなと通話しているらしく、このシーンをみんなで見てる時、ざちょ「堀さんだ」草「堀さんだねぇ」なんて言われながらみんなに笑われておりました。

However, while the stream was happening, I couldn't imagine this, but...to tell the truth, the way I usually speak to everyone is like Takara's non-committal way of speaking to the Queen, so when everyone saw this scene, the leader [Sakata] went, "That's Hori-san," and Kusano went, "That's Hori-san, isn't it?" without saying anything and so everyone laughed. 電話が切れた後の豊穣さんと女王の会話から、寶さんのお父上が夭聖界にとって如何に大事な存在だったかがわかります。

After the call was cut, we learn how important Takara's father is in the fairy world from Houjou and the Queen's conversation. そんな豊穣さんからの厚い信頼に応えるように、どこかのお姉さんへお誘いをかける寶さん…

While proving worthy of Houjou's kind confidence, Takara is asking a girl out somewhere... お相手の名前、ayakoさんって面白い名前だなぁと思ってたら、堀気づいちゃいました。[T/N: The source text, as you can see when you pause the ep. at the right time, is meant to say "[at sign]yako", but the at sign was tripping the "mention a user" function in Tumblr, so I had to swap it out with a lowercase A where it appears in this post.]

His partner's name is "ayako", which I thought was an amusing name. これ、あやこって読むんですね！！！（アハ体験）

This is read "Ayako", isn't it?!!! (a-ha moment) そしてはい、きました、 バリバリのバリのショタカラさん！！！！（人間体）

Also, we got to see him, the very vigorous sho-Takara!!!! (human form) [T/N: Literally "we got to see him" was "[he] came", LOL.] [T/N 2: Sho-Takara = shota (prepubescent boy) + Takara.] あまりの可愛さにコメントも騒然としましたね。

There was an uproar in the comments that he's excessively cute. 回想シーンでは以前も登場した、弁護士さんと寶さんの関係も明らかになりました。

The relationship between the lawyer, who's appeared before this flashback scene, and Takara is also made clear. 弁護士さんも元夭聖、しかも寶さんのお父上とただならぬ関係だったみたいです。

The lawyer was also from the fairy world and had a strong relationship with Takara's father. 幼い寶さんは弁護士さんからどんな風に人間界の生き方を仕込まれたんでしょうか…

What sort of way of living in the human world did the very young Takara learn from the lawyer...? 半裸シーツで肌に傷をおった姿のショタカラさんが、窓の外を見上げながら「いつかきっと… 」と呟く様子にその壮絶さを感じます。

The half-naked and wounded sho-Takara, looking out the window and whispering, "Someday, surely..." [gives off a] heroic feeling. [T/N: I couldn't use the CR quote for this because that's translated more in context, as just "someday".] 寶さんのエセ関西弁は、この弁護士さんに仕込まれた影響だったんですね。

Takara's fake Kansai accent is acquired from the lawyer's. そして現代に戻ったと思ったら、 飛んで火にいる子猫ちゅわん！

Also, when we think we've returned to the present, a kitten jumps into the flame! [T/N: This translation builds off the CR version of the line, "Like a kitten to the flame!"] 今回の依頼人、ティナさんの登場です！！

This time's client, Tina, appears!! 「ちょっと何言ってるかわからないんだけど！」

"Oh, please! That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" 寶さんこの時のっけから飛ばしまくっていたので、堀はこの台詞がツボに入って笑いを堪えるのが大変でした。

Takara, at that time, couldn't help but send her flying from the beginning and it was difficult for me because I was trying not to laugh - there was "tsubo" in my lines. あいも変わらずスマートに名刺を渡すも、「世界で一番惚れてる男のところに連れてって！」とピシャリ。

Even after [Takara was] as smooth as ever and [handed] over the business card, she refused with "Take me to the man I love most!" [T/N: The word for "smooth" here is literally "smart", but "smart" doesn't seem to have the right connotations.] …どうやら今回の依頼人も、一筋縄ではいかないみたいです。

...apparently, this time's client seems very straightforward. 『快楽』ﾁﾘﾘﾘﾝ

"Hedonism" *ring ring ring* 寶さんはティナさんをお子さんのお迎えに連れて行き、そのまま2人を仕事場へと送り届けます。

Takara brought Tina to her child and, without a pause, brought those two to [Tina's] workplace. 仕事場ではみんなでティナさんのお子さんをあやしていたり、同僚の方のティナさんのダンスへの信頼に、思わずいい職場だなぁと感心する堀でしたが。。。

At the workplace, everyone comforted Tina's child and Tina's colleagues had confidence in her dance, so I admired, without thinking, how good of a workplace it was... そこに現れる父親、妻原さんですよ！！！！！（ﾌﾝﾇｰ‼︎）

Then the husband, Tsumahara, appeared!!!!! (Barbarian!!) [T/N: There is no confirmed reading of this name, so it might be "Tsumabara".] 前回のうるう回の久二さんも相当でしたが…勝るとも劣らない圧倒的なそれ…っ！！

He's equivalent to last time's (Uruu's episode's) Kyuji...but [Kyuji] overwhelmingly compares favourably to that guy...!! お子さんの顔も見ずにお金をせびるのみならず、ティナさんの一張羅のコートまで…！！

Not only does he demand money without seeing his child's face, but he also goes as far as taking Tina's one good coat...!! ちょっと申し訳なさそうにして受け取るのがまた、なんかもう…っ！！

The fact he looks a little apologetic as he receives it is just...!! だのにティナさんは、頑張って稼がなきゃって…″家族″のためにって(′つω；｀)

Despite this, Tina must try her hardest to make money...for her "family". (′つω；｀) その言葉は、お子さんに対してだけじゃなくて…うわぁああああ！！！

Those word aren't just for her family...uwaaaaa!!! 次のカットで妻原さんは貰ったそのお金をギャンブルに突っ込んでました（遠い目）

In the next cut, Tsumahara pushes the money he received into gambling. (distant eyes) この時の寶さんのモテポイント、 「姉さん、そろそろ出番でっせ」は何も見なかったように落ち着いて投げてあげて、 それでも見られたくない所を見られちゃった、というニュアンスが返ってきたら 「こういうことする俺、格好ええやろ？」と冗談まじりに茶化しながら優しさを渡す。

This is the time Takara is popular. He says, "Dearie? I think you're on." He calms down and gives up as if he never saw anything, but even still, after he returned [from seeing her exchange with Tsumahara] with a nuance of "he saw what he did not want to see", he would joke gently, "Aren't I cool for doing this sort of thing?" and poke fun at himself. この機微がモテる大人のテクニックなんですよ…！！

This subtlety is a technique popular with adults...!! 見てくださってる男性の皆さんにも是非取り入れていただきたい…なぁみんな！！？

Any men watching should certainly take in this [advice]...yeah, everyone?!! 堀は後十年は修行させてください(′・ω・｀)

Please train me [in the art of love] for another 10 years. (′・ω・｀) はい、一方BAR Fは今日もカレーです。

Yes, at the same time, there's curry at Bar F today too. 前回のラストが熱い…！展開だっただけに、皆さんあれからどうなったのか、眠れない夜を過ごされていたと思います。

The conclusion last time was intense...! I'm sure everyone had a sleepless night wondering what happened after that development. 何気なく水をうるうくんに渡す焔くん 、 何気なく焔くんを気遣ううるうくん、 照れながらも返事をする焔くん、 嬉しそうな蘭丸樹果バックン。

Homura, who's casually giving water to Uruu,

Uruu, who worries about Homura,

Homura, who blushes while responding,

Ranmaru, Juka and Bakkun, who seem happy. てぇてぇが過ぎてぇ堀は平身低頭（てぇとう）ですありがてぇ…ありがてぇてぇ！！！！

They're excessively precious and I was prostrating myself, thanking them...thanks, precious!!!! [T/N: Hori slurs several of his words in this sentence, typically てぇてぇ = toutoi (precious/noble), 平身低頭 = heishin teitou (prostrating oneself) and ありがてぇ = arigatou (thank you). He then combines てぇてぇ and ありがてぇ, hence "precious".] それから所変わってお出掛け中の寶さん、 いつも通りキスのおねだりを茶化しながら交わしていきます。

Then, in the meantime, Takara was out, as always, begging for kisses and teasing a woman. 聞こえないくらいの声で憂うように、「わいが欲しいのは、なんやろなぁ」とポツリ。

In a voice that can barely be heard, he mumbles, "I don't know what I want..." この台詞は後の展開にも効いてくる凄く大事な台詞なんですが…。

This line is very important in terms of later developments... コメントで「（カレーには）ナンやろなぁ…」って書いた人怒らないから正直に言いなさい（ﾋﾟｷﾋﾟｷ）

In the comments, there was a person who wrote, "I don't know what (curry) I want..." - please say who you are, I won't be mad *veins snap* Aパートおしまい！

That's the end of the A part! ブログでもCM入ります！情報いっぱいだよ！

This is a blog, but I'll still insert ads! There's a lot of info! ・山野ホールでライブします！（9/18だよ！）

- The live show at Noyama Hall! (On the 18th of September!) ・特典盛り沢山のBD、DVD発売します！（第1巻は６/16発売！）

- The BD/DVD is being sold, with lots of bonuses! (1st BD/DVD sold on the 16th of June!) ・キャラソンアルバムHEAVENS DOOR発売します！（同じく6/16、遂に艶歌が全部聞けるよ！）

- The character song album HEAVEN'S DOOR is being sold! (On the same day [as the BD/DVD], the 16th of June, so you can finally hear the whole enka!) てつえーさん「Nice Pole Dance…ﾀﾞﾝｽﾀﾞﾝｽ」（ええ声エコー）

Tetsuei [Sumiya]: "Nice pole dance...(dance dance)" (nice voice echo) Bパートいきます！！

To the B part!! 開幕ティナさんのキラキラポールダンスからスタート！！

The curtain opens on Tina, who starts with a sparkling pole dance!! お子さんを膝に乗せて馴染んでいる寶さん。

The child, who's on the lap of and [now] accustomed to Takara. お子さんのママ～！の声、可愛いですねぇ(´,,･Д･,,`)

The child's cry of "Mama~!" was cute, wasn't it? (´,,･Д･,,`) やはり彼のためにも、家族の為にも頑張るというティナさん。

Of course, Tina will try hard for his sake, for the family's sake. 自身の生い立ちから、家族という存在をいかに大事にしているかが伺えます。

From his own background, we can see how much he values the existence of his family. 5話の寶回の時の依頼人の恵夢さんもやはり家族のために身を粉にして働いていましたし、今回のティナさんも…。

From episode 5's Takara episode, the client, Emu, also worked assiduously for her family, so this time's Tina also... 寶さんにも金鋼族の復興のため、寶さんのため、痩せ細った体で自分の食べるものすら譲ってくれたお母さんという存在がいたからこそ、家族のために自分を犠牲にして頑張る方に複雑な思いを抱いてしまうのでは無いでしょうか。

In order for Takara to revive the Metallum Clan, for Takara's sake, Takara's mother even gave over her own food and it is precisely because of that that she became a victim of trying hard for the sake of her family and that's why Takara has such complicated emotions, is it not? しかも今回はその″家族″が不義を行っているなんて…。

Moreover, this time, this time's "family" is unjust... そしてそして！！！！！

Also, also!!!!! お待たせしました！銭湯ノルマ達成ですありがとうございます！！

Thanks for waiting! Thanks for fulfilling the bath quota!! この時流れてきた「みんなストローは持ったかァ！！」ってコメント、爆笑しました。

At this time, the comment that came about was "Everyone's holding straws!!" and so there was uproarious laughter. [T/N: It's not clear if there's just one person laughing or many, hence the intentional vagueness.] ですが今回の銭湯の中身はすっごくシリウス…じゃなかったシリアス。

However, this time's bath [scene] is amazingly serious...not (Sirius). [T/N: Hori inserts Sirius's name at the end of the sentence as a pun on "serious", so if it seemed like the translation said "serious, not serious", I did my job.] みんなの顔を眺めながら、豊穣さんと交わした特命の話を回想していきます。

After we gaze at everyone's faces, we go to a flashback scene where [Takara is] given his directive from Houjou. その中には女王に内密の話まで…そんな重たいものを���負いながら、寶さんはみんなに��日カレーを作っていたんですね。

In that it's to the point it's kept a secret from the Queen...Takara makes curry for everyone everyday while burdened with those heavy things, huh? でも、これまで毎日みんなでカレーを食べて、銭湯に入って、愛著を集めて、日々を過ごして。

However, until now, every day everyone's eaten their curry, gone to the bath, gathered attachment and spent their days [together].

家族として一緒に過ごしてきたみんなの顔を見回した時の寶さんの顔は、優しさに満ち溢れた顔でした。

As family, when spending time together and looking around at everyone's faces, Takara's face is full of affection. この時の「楽しい時間は長く続きまへんな」という台詞。

At this time, there is the line: "The fun times never last, do they?" 寶さんのみならず、堀自身もF蘭の最終回の近さを意識しておりましたので、言葉にした時に込み上げるものがありました。

Not only Takara, but I personally realised F-Ran's final episode is near and so, while I'm bad at putting this into words, [emotions] welled up inside me. そして明らかになる妻原さんの別の家族の存在。

Then, it becomes clear Tsumahara has a different family. ティナさんと妻原さんの会話が始まります。

Tina starts a conversation with Tsumahara. もうここの妻原さんのクズっぷりが真骨頂！！！

Already, the Tsumahara from this [point in] time's true worth is basically scum!!! ティナさんがあまりにもあまりにも可哀想で…

Tina is really, really unfortunate... 「お前も俺を見捨てるんだな！！」

"So, you're abandoning me too!!" あんた、別のところでも同じようなことしとったんか…？

Aren't you the same, even though it's from a different perspective...? 絶望のあまり、倒された���ミ袋の上で笑うしかなくなってしまうティナさん。

Without much remorse, Tina has no choice as she's left collapsed on the rubbish bags and Tsumahara laughs. そこに夭聖は現れるんです…！！

Then, the fairies appear...!! 「美人さん、お持ち帰りしてええか？」

"Lovely lady, might I walk you home?" ほんと、全人類言ってみたい台詞トップ5にランクインする台詞です…！！

Really, that's going to rank in the top 5 lines that all of humanity wants to be said to them...!! チャイルドシートを携えたいつもの車でティナさんの話を聞く寶さん。

Takara listens to the story of Tina, who's always carrying a child seat around with her. 「わかってた、利用されてるだけって」

"I knew...some part of me knew he was just using me." 「なのに、あいつがポケットに手を入れた時にさ、指輪かなって思ったんだよね」

"But when he reached into his pocket, I honestly thought it might be a ring." 「笑顔で溢れるあったかい家庭、作りたかったの」

"I wanted to create a happy family, full of smiles..." この台詞が悲痛過ぎて…。

These lines are too sorrowful... 堀は最初、思わず拳を握りしめて返す台詞をかけてしまいました。

I, at first, clenched my fists without thinking at these lines. ですがこの時、製作陣から、何より真摯に優しさを向けてあげて。

However, this time, I felt sincerely affectionate for this cobbled-together group. 頑張っている人は報われるんだよ。ってティナに伝えて欲しい、というディレクションを頂いて。

I received the direction that I should convey to Tina, "Hard work will be rewarded!" このシーンの台詞は寶さん自身の言葉で、その思いが乗らなきゃダメなんだと何度もトライさせていただきました。

This scene's dialogue is in Takara's own words and I had to try repeatedly to convey his thoughts on it. 「あなたの心、頂けますか？」 から大自然の流れでジャ…変身の時間だぁーーー！！！！！

After "Could I take your heart?", the scene changes and...it's transformation time---!!!!! 思わずナイスバルク！と声をかけたくなる惚れ惚れする筋肉。

Without thinking, I was charmed by [Takara's] muscles and wanted to call out, "Nice bulk!" 画面いっぱいに広がる肉体美と拳、地面をぶっ壊しながらあげる名乗り。

The physical beauty of his body and fists filled the screen, he broke the ground and called out his name. 格好よさが臨界点突破して美しいに昇華しとるんですよ！！！！！！！

His coolness has broken through the critical point and sublimated itself into beauty!!!!!!! 妻原さんはティナさんとあんな会話をした後だというのに、 魂が昂りながら「夢も愛もどうでもいい」なんて曰いながらギャンブルに興じていらっしゃいますねぇ…。

Tsumahara, even after he had that conversation with Tina, happily spends his days gambling, arousing his spirit as he says, "What do dreams and love matter?" バレさん、技を借りるぜ…！！

Balle-san, I'll borrow a technique of yours...!! ふざけんにょ！！！！！

Stop screwing around!!!!! [T/N: reference to Balle-san's ep. 9 post] そして始まる艶歌、五話もそうでしたが、歌詞が今回の話とのリンクして、絵の美しさも合間って没入してしまいます。

Then the enka begins - it was in ep. 5 as well but the lyrics are linked to this episode and I was immersed in the beauty of the visuals for a moment. 早くフルで聴いてほしい！！！皆様、是非HEAVENS DOORを！「愛の勘定」も勿論ですが、みんなの艶歌をフルで聴けばストーリーとのリンクが増して、よりグッと来るはずです！！！

I want you to hurry and listen to the full version!!!! Everyone, please listen to HEAVEN'S DOOR! There's "Payment of Love" of course, but if you listen to everyone's full enka, you'll [be able to make] links with the story and it will hit you in the feels!!! 艶歌が終わり、ドアが開けば今回のヘブンズ空間はまるで屏風の中に入ったかのような和風の世界。

After the enka ends, the door opens to this time's Heaven's Room, which is a Japanese-style world quite like that on a folding screen. そこに雷神と雷神を模したかのような敵が現れます。

Then, enemies that look like the well-known thunder god and a thunder god's imitation appear. [T/N: referring to Raijin] 毎回のことですが、ヘブンズ空間も本当に趣向を凝らしてあって…ど緊張のバトルシーンのはずなのに、思わず堀の魂も昂ってしまいます…！！！

It happens every time, but these Heaven's Rooms are really ingenious...there should've been a hugely nerve-wracking battle scene, but without thinking, my spirit was unintentionally aroused...!!! なんと今回の鍵穴にはティナさんとお子さんの2人が！

What? This time Tina and her child are both behind the keyhole! なぜわかったノルマに愛らしい声が混ざる日が来るとは。

I never thought I'd see the day where a charming voice would be mixed in with the "What? I got it!" quota. そしてもう一方の鍵穴からは妻原さんの極悪な声が…

Also, in the other keyhole is Tsumahara's heinous voice... 「人はなあ！快楽には勝てねぇんだよ！」 「酒！タバコ！セッッッ！！薬物！！特にギャンブルはなぁ！！」

"A person can't conquer their hedonistic tendencies! The pleasures of drinking! Smoking! Sex! Drugs! And gambling especially!!" [T/N: Hori censors the word "sex" by "stuttering" over the final syllable but CR doesn't, so I've sided with the latter.] 座長が現場で ハッキリ言ったぁーーー！！！ってツッコんでたのを覚えていますw

"The leader put it clearly at the time--!!!" I remember joking. ですが、言葉のパワーはもうネタの領域を超えた、狂気の世界のそれです。

However, that is a mad world where the power of words is beyond the realm of stories. その言葉に促されるように敵から酒の玉攻撃が、 そしてもう一方の敵からはヤニの煙の攻撃が。

With those urging words, the enemies send bubbles of alcohol and then from the other side comes a tobacco smoke attack. この時のうめき声のディレクションは、堀くん今○○kgの重りが乗ってるよ！！ と言われながら、体にそれに合わせた負荷をかけるように声を出していました。次の日筋肉痛になりました。

At this time, when the direction, "Groan and pretend you have a __ kg weight on you!!" was given, as I shouted, it was like a corresponding load was being added. The next day my muscles hurt. なんとか持ち堪えた寶さんですが、 「なら、これならどうかしら…」 その言葉と共に現れる寶さんのお母さんの幻想。

Takara's able to hold out somehow, but then an illusion of Takara's mother appears with the words, "Well, what will you do?" 前回もうるうくんのお母さんと焔くんのお父さんが現れましたが、まさか今回は寶さんのお母さんが…。

Last time, Uruu's mother and Homura's father appeared, so surely this time Takara's mother... しかもこんな形で痩せ細っていないお母さんの姿を見ることになるなんて…！

Furthermore, to see his not-so-skinny mother in this form...! あの優しかった声で、こちらに攻撃をかけてきます。

This is the attack that's given with that gentle voice. 押し倒されて首をしめられる寶さん。

Takara is being held down and strangled [by his mother's illusion]. この時の台詞の色気も相まって、まるで2人が繋がっているような…

Coupled with the sexiness of the dialogue at this point, it's as if the two are connected... 更に畳み掛けるようにチェリーの入ったグラスから液体を口に含み、そのマッマ寶さんの口に流し込みます。

Furthermore, as if pressing for answers, Takara's mother uses her mouth to pour liquid into Takara's mouth, from a glass with a cherry in it. 苦しさのあまり悶絶絶叫する寶さん、これは先の妻原さんの「酒、タバコ、セッッッッ、そして薬物」それらの快楽を暗喩しているのでしょうか。

Is Takara, who's about to scream and faint in agony, [being subjected to] metaphors for hedonism Tsumahara was mentioning earlier? そしてシリウスの登場です。

Also, Sirius appears. す○ざんまいのポーズって言うのやめーや！！！

Stop doing the Su___zanmai pose!!! [T/N: referring to the dude who stands with his hands outstretched from Sushizanmai] しかし今回の句には堀は思わず確かに…と頷いてしまいました。

However, this time I couldn't help but nod and say, "Indeed..." 人は何故ほんの刹那の快楽のために沢山のものを犠牲にしてしまうのか…

Why do we sacrifice so much for a fleeting moment of pleasure? むしろ刹那だからこそ、それを追い求めてしまうのかもしれませんね（哲学）

Rather, it's because it's momentary that we chase it and seek it out? (philosophising) 苦しみながらも、「俺が欲しいものはこんなんじゃない」と懸命に耐える寶。

Even in agony, Takara eagerly bears it [and says], "This isn't what I want." しかしそれも、「あなたが欲しいのは、母親からの豊満な愛情でしょう？」と、肥大化した幻想に押しつぶされる寶さん。

However, in addition to that, the illusion becomes fat [with the words], "What you want is the full-bodied love of your mother!" ニコニコのタグにもありましたが、確かに快楽要素全部乗せプレスは重い、重すぎます。

As the tag on Nico Nico said, it is true that all the hedonistic elements being pressed are heavy, far too heavy, イきかける寶さんですがなんとか力を振り絞り、幻想を押しのけます。

Takara is about to have the life choked out of him, but he comes to his senses and pushes the illusion away. しかしそれが最後の力だったのか、体が動かず追撃をかわせそうにありません…！

However, that was the last of his strength and so he's not able to move...! これで終わりか…と思ったその瞬間ですよ！！！！！

This was the moment...I thought it was the end!!!!! 最高に勇ましい掛け声と共に焔が敵の攻撃から寶を守ります！！

With a shout, Homura, who's the best and heroic, comes and protects Takara from attack!! そのまま蘭丸とうるうが雷神と風神を倒し、樹果が 「オン・アユス・ヴァルタ！」の掛け声とともにペロキャンを振って寶さんを回復してくれます。

Similarly, Ranmaru and Uruu bring down the thunder gods and, with his tongue stuck out and his lollipop, Juka yells, "On ayus valta!" to heal Takara. ここ、さいっっっっっこうに熱かったです！！！！！

This was the most intensssssssssssssse [moment]!!!!! 寶のピンチに駆けつけるファミリー達、初めての全員集合、初めての共闘！！！

This is the first time they've [run to Takara's aid and] fought as a family when Takara was in a pinch!!! 台本を読ませてもらった時は、遂にきたか…！くらいの興奮だったんですが、 現場でこのシーンを録った時、こーすけの「はぁあああああ！！」って勇ましい声が聞こえてきた瞬間、鳥肌がブワァーって！体がカァーッて！熱くなったことを強く覚えています。

When reading the script, I was exhilarated to the point of going, "Finally, they came!" and now that this scene is recorded, I strongly remember the moment Kohsuke [Tanabe] valiantly can be heard going, "Haaaaaaaaaaa!!" I got goosebumps from the passion. 蘭丸とうるうの声も頼もしくて、樹果のたからぁ～！って呼び声に癒されて。

Trustworthy Ranmaru and Uruu, and Juka healing Takara by calling out his name. こんなに頼もしい仲間達が揃って、負けるわけがないですよ！！！！

With trustworthy friends like these, you won't lose!!!! この後の飛び上がるシーンも、月を殴りつけるシーンも、高まったボルテージを思いっきりぶつけさせて頂きました！

After this is the flying scene, the moon-breaking scene and I was able to use my heightened [emotions] to the fullest! [T/N: Hori calls his heightened emotions "voltage".] そしてGO TO HEAVEN!!!!!

Then, GO TO HEAVEN!!!!! 「またすっからかんかよぉ～！」なん���言いながら、トドメを刺された時の勢いで手持ちをオールインしてしまう妻原さん。

Tsumahara, for some reason, said, "I'm broke again?!" as he's finished off while playing everything he has with an all-in due to his leftover momentum. [T/N: the all-in in poker] ティナさんの「寶さん、あなたと結ばれたかった…」

Tina: "Takara...I wish we could've been together." 依頼人からこんなに純粋に好意を向けられるなんて…寶さんも罪な人ね。

The client has this kind of pure affection [for him]...Takara's also a wrongdoer, isn't he? ですがそれは叶わない、ティナさんもわかっているからこその過去形なのでしょうか…。

However, that can't be granted, since Tina understanding him is now past tense, isn't it...? こんなにも切ないワンシーンなのに、もう1人の堀が「あなたと結バレッタ裕…」って囁いてきてもうダメです（現在朝4時）

In this one heartrending scene, too, another Hori whispers to me, "You and Yutaka Balletta ..." but it's already no good (currently 4 in the morning)

全てが片付き、夭聖体のみんなが寶さんに声をかけてきます。

Everything's wrapped up so everyone calls out to Takara. なんだよお前ら、ちくしょー、まじで、お前ら…(′つω；｀)

What the hell, everyone, damn, really, you guys... (′つω；｀) しかもうるうくん、「僕たちは、ファミリーなのだから」それってさ、焔くんのことも、みんなのことも引っくるめて″ファミリー″なんだよね…？

Yet, Uruu goes, "We're family, in case you've forgotten." That means Homura and everyone are 'family', huh...? 万感の思いを込めて「サンキュ」と一言だけ返す寶さん。

Takara returns that with a single word full of emotions: "Thank you." 寶さん、あなたの欲しかったものって、きっと…

Takara, what you really want is certainly... そして後方家族面の蘭丸、その視線の先には様子を見ていたチルカが…。

Then, from behind Ranmaru, Chilka, who was watching him out of the corner of his eye... かつて愛していると言っていた蘭丸に対して、「Go to Hell!!地獄に落としてやる！」と言い残してその場を去ります。

As opposed to [when] he said he loved Ranmaru in the past, he leaves as he [yells], "Go to hell!!" …何故和訳してくれたんだ…。そこに不穏な空気が残ります。

Why did this Japanese translation come up? This left a disquieting atmosphere. [T/N: Hori translates "Go to hell!" (ENG) as "Fall into hell!" (JPN).] 豊穣さんの「いいファミリーになりましたな」

Houjou: "They've become a fine family indeed." この一言、嬉しかったなぁ。

I was happy with this one brief comment.

第一話の時、「君たちは今からファミリーだ」 なんて言われて戸惑っていた5人ですが、今では声を大にしてファミリー蘭丸って叫べます。

In episode 1, he says, "From now on, you are family," leaving the 5 of them bewildered, but now they can yell about how they're "family Ranmaru". いや、ファミリー蘭丸ではないけどね！？山本さんのプリティミス（伏線）だけどね！？笑

No, not "family Ranmaru"?! Is this a pretty mistake from Yamamoto (foreshadowing)?! (LOL) [T/N: This is referring to Bakkun's VA Kazutomi Yamamoto. Also, yes, it does say "pretty mistake", but it's likely to be "printing mistake".] そんな中改めて十訓を厳守させよと戒める女王。

In that [part], the Queen once again demands rigid adherence of the 10 Laws. あのような過ちとは…過去の因縁はまだ根が深そうです。

A mistake like that... it seems that past fates are still deep-rooted. そしてここからが怒涛の展開ですよ皆さん。

Then, everyone, the surge in developments [happens] from here. なんとあのシルク・ドゥ・マーズから合格通知が届いたティナさん！

Tina's somehow received a notification of acceptance into Cirque de Mars! 相当頑張ってきた努力が遂に実って、ニューヨークから熱いラブコールをかけられています。

The hard work she put in has finally pulled off and she's receiving passionate calls from New York. 喜んでいたのも束の間、そこに現れたのはなんと妻原さん！！？

It was a short moment that she could be happy, and then, who would arrive but Tsumahara?!! あんたって人は、懲りずにまだティナさんに…と持ったらなんと勝ちすぎちまったから命を狙われている！？

He's still trying to teach Tina a lesson, but...he won too much and they're gonna kill him?!

それもしかして、GO TO HEAVENされた時のオールインで…！？

On top of that, what about the all-in from the GO TO HEAVEN...?! すっからかんかよォー！！じゃなかったのかよォー！！

He's not broke anymore?!! 費用も全て持つから連れて行ってくれ、なんて、うーん、ティナさんとしては助かるけど…。

He'll come along, pay for everything and, yeah, sorta help Tina out...? まぁ、イケメンだからいっか……よくないわい！！！！

Well, he's handsome...but no!!!! [T/N: reference to ep. 5] 改心して今度こそ家族になるのか、それともニューヨークでまた悶着を起こすのかはわかりませんが、なんにせよティナさんとお子さんの先行きが明るくて良かったです。

I don't know if the family has reformed properly or if they're going to New York to quarrel again, but Tina and her child's future is bright. その様子を微笑ましく見ていた寶さんの元に、一本の電話が。

After seeing the smiling child's face, he receives a call. シリウスの事を伝えていた弁護士さんから、大変なことがわかったぞ、と。

The lawyer uncovered some [information] about Sirius and it's something unbelievable. 女王の過去や！と言いながら見せた一枚の写真には…、 あ、あ、あ、あ、あアイドルユニットぉ！！？

"...the Queen's past!" he says as we're shown a photo of an...i-i-i-i-i-idol unit?!! かつて一大ブームを巻き起こした、ウィンタートライアングル。

Winter Tri-angels, who created a sensational big boom in the past. シリウス！？ベテルギウス！！？プロキオン…？

Sirius?! Betelgeuse?!! Procyon...? シリウスとベテルギウスは恐らく…でも姿が…！？

Sirius and Betelgeuse are probably...but that form is...?! そして女王の過去というのは、この写真とどう関係してくるのでしょうか…。

Also, what does the Queen's past have to do with this picture...? 女王の過去や、チルカと蘭丸の確執、夭聖界のことや、寶さんの言っていたもう一山、更にここに来てまた新しい謎が…！！！

The Queen's past, Chilka and Ranmaru's antagonism, the fairy world, all the stuff Takara said - on top of that, another mystery...!!! 本編もいよいよクライマックスに向けて、盛り上がりが止まるところを知りません。

At last, we're approaching the climax of the main story and I don't know if [the tension] will stop rising.

いよいよあと二話ですが、最後までみんなで大騒ぎしていきましょう！

Finally, there's two episodes to go, so let's get really excited until the end! Fairy蘭丸～あなたの心お助けします～ 次回『憎悪』もお見逃しなく！！というわけで、禁忌其の拾『快楽』堀の感想ここまでとなります。

Don't miss the next episode of Fairy Ranmaru ~We Will Help Your Heart~, "Hatred"!! That's it for my impressions on Taboo No. 10, "Hedonism". ここまで長い文章に付き合って頂き、ありがとうございました！！

Thanks for keeping me company [as I write] these long sentences!! 余談なんですが、大体メインキャストは一緒に録るんですが、この回の収録は実は堀が1人ブースに籠って先に録られた皆様の声を聴きながら台詞を当てておりました。

As a side note, usually the main cast would record together, but this time, I was alone in the booth, listening to the voices of those who recorded before as I added my lines. 収録が終わってからブースのドアを開けて、 誰もいないだろうなぁ、と思ってフッと休憩スペースを見たら、 なんと5 to HEAVENのみんなが残ってくれてて、映像が流れるディスプレイをずっと見守ってくれてて、 こっちを向いて堀さんお疲れ！とか、メッチャ汗だくじゃん！とか笑いながら言ってくれて。

When I finished recording and opened the booth, I looked at the rest area, thinking no one was there. Surprisingly, everyone from 5 to HEAVEN was there, watching over a video display. They turned to me and said things like, "Good work, Hori-san!" and "You're so sweaty!" so I laughed while I talked. その瞬間、堀の頭の中に寶さんのサンキュ。のシーンがリフレインして、 なんかしどろもどろになるくらい嬉しかったです。きっとあの瞬間は忘れられないです。

In that moment, the scene where Takara says, "Thank you," played again in my head and although I was [in a state of] confusion, I was happy. I will surely not forget that moment. はい、余談終わり！笑

Yes, I'm done with my side note! (LOL) 話が進むにつれて、SNSで#F蘭丸であげてくださってる実況や感想、ファンアートや、写真など、盛り上がっているのを実感しております。

To continue the conversation, use #F蘭丸 on your real-time impressions, fanart, photos etc., which will give a real feeling to your excitement. そしてそれを見ている時、堀はスマホを握りしめるくらい嬉しくなります。

Also, when I see those, I become so happy, I grasp my phone tightly. いつもF蘭を応援して下さり本当にありがとうございます。皆さんの声が僕らの力になります！

As always, really, thank you for supporting F-Ran. Everyone's voices will be my strength! 引き続きFairy蘭丸を応援の程、何卒よろしくお願いいたします！！！

Please kindly take care of me as you continue to support Fairy Ranmaru!!! このブログ書くの頑張ったからな！

I tried my best with this blog [post]! 読んでくれてメチャクチャ嬉しかったからな！

Thanks a lot for reading! 雅楽代 た～から！役の堀曜宏でした！

This has been Akihiro Hori! who plays the role of Ta~kara Utashiro! スネークバァーイ！🐍

Snake-bye!🐍 [T/N: "Snakebite Hori" joke.] ワイの魅力、皆にも伝わったかな～？

Takara: Did I convey my appeal to everyone~?

Update: Fixed the note regarding "Yamamoto". Thanks, @blankie-greenie-anon.

Update 2: Missed a sentence, improved a sentence and fixed some pronouns and other minor things.

Update 3: Improved a sentence.

[bae-science]

now newt you may be thinking you’ve decided to double major and have a minor in your greatest act of nomative determinism yet how could you POSSIBLY have time to keep your mind sharp and sexy with real books and still read fanfic? well i’m going to college in a pandemic, that’s why. hardest battles sexiest soldiers and all that. here’s some white boy tuesday.

Overworked by Ferrety

WHAT a good good depiction of a meltdown and an even better autistic hermann. great fresh voice that feels true to character, the buildup is well paced so that when the h/c does hit it’s well-earned and cathartic, and all in all some really good classic lab era whump

double back by @ghostpressure

ghost drift translated to prose is really hard to pull off, so big kudos for keeping things poetic and mind-fucky, but still coherent and easy to understand. i love the little crystalized moments we get that tell us how clearly hermann is cataloguing them, which is a great detail to show inner thoughts rather than telling. i love love love the dialogue; it bounces the line between proper banter and the more serious, introspective tone the fic takes very well

All Clear by @trifoliate-undergrowth (NSFW)

this bitch has the TROPES. hate makeouts? arguments turn to more? trapped somewhere together and tension rises as they’re forced to wait it out? WALL SLAM HELLO. never before have i actually seen so many classic newmann faves for nsfw in one place and it’s like the scholastic book fair for adults. very cute voice for hermann as well, because oh yeah, he really is a dude in his late 20s and not actually an 80 year old turtle in a sweater

heat of the moment by @kingeiszler (NSFW)

if any of you so much as LOOK at me i will stomp you to death with my hooves. trans horny newt rights also i was NOT expecting that angst with a happy ending moment at the end but like fuck. this fic is packing about as much good stuff as the front of newt’s hot topic jeans. hermann gottlieb god of WAP

Dress Code by @arcanemoody

there are not enough fics centered around newt and his self-image post-pru and ESPECIALLY not enough dealing with him finding his style again. i think this concept is such a good one to explore nonbinary newt through (if i get a single “kinnie” in my askbox i’m writing a fic where stan twitter outs the precursors as possessing newt because they made an account and popped off. do not test me you all know i’m fucking crazy but i’m free) since so much of gender presentation is in clothes, along with the other stuff the precursors clearly took over in uprising. and then i know we all love to interpret the “whoever will take him” as newt being bi but i’m always glad when it’s noted in fic, and the way it’s used to develop his character works very well

The Geiszler-Gottlieb Wedding by Goldmoth

if for nothing else please go to the second chapter of this fic and read the playlist because i literally fell out of my bed laughing and had a bump on the back of my head the size of a cherry. worth it.

Baby, I’m a fool for you by @that-one-fandom-chick

wingman vanessa supremacy. twilight soundtrack supremacy. hermann meeting newt while he’s in a band SUPREMACY also with a lot of these fics combining it with “first meeting” everything usually goes wrong, but it was so refreshing to have that extremely cute diner scene at the end.... the old friend mitski vibes of it all........ gay hands hermann rights

Now We Have the Salad by MnemonicMadness

i wanna say right off the bat this concept tickles me so deeply because if a non diabetic person switched bodies with a t1d (moi) i would have to helicopter parent 90% of everything they did if i didn’t want to, like. die. or at least have a fucked a1c. anyway this is a really great twist on the body swap trope that takes full advantage of hermann’s disability as a plot point, and with the added variety of being post-uprising. that last bit is what makes the story work, actually, because if it were simply pr1 era, you wouldn’t really have an excuse for newt so desperately wanting to give hermann time in a pain-free body without it coming off as pitying and insensitive. but tack on the guilt of the precursors, and what they did to hermann, and you have the perfect justification for newt’s actions. smart writing! and some good old mortifying ordeal of being known that stays tasteful in context

i’m drawn to you, honey, like the sea to the fisherman’s daughter by @campgender  

i love a good post pr1 beach house fic i cannot lie! “newt and hermann don’t have ppdc jobs anymore but they sure do have trauma!” fics have sort have gone out of fashion post-events that occurred in 2018, but this one is a very good blast from the past. i love the beginning, which is such a fucking accurate depiction of how people used to having to be hyper competent in traumatic situations react to it being all over abruptly. i LOVE LOVE the ending, it’s so true to character and what i hope a good pr2 would have done for newt. this thing is chock-full of so many good lines, like “Maybe I don’t know how to live with nice things.” fucking MOOD and “’If you’re good enough at what you do,’ Hermann says firmly, ‘which you are, people tend to pretend as if the rest of it doesn’t exist.’” is so so accurate to the academia climb when you’re disabled, let me fucking tell you. great moment after great moment.

I’ve Got Your Letter by @coloredpencilroses

A if i rec this then ten things i hate about you au in my mouth please. please. please. anyway this fic is SO fun and good i love the writing style and how the humor is fun and consistent throughout both povs, the slowburn keeps things agonizing but has enough fun characters and plot to keep you invested and not just begging for an end so you can skip to it, TENDO KING OF BRAIN CELLS, and i haven’t seen you’ve got mail so i’m literally saving it until this thing finishes to keep the suspense. excellent fic for autumn

now usually this is where i plug my most recent work but since #theprecursorsareoverparty has spawned a more vitriol and hateful reaction than i ever could have dreamed, read i never liked that ending either and get yourself some culture. and stan tom stoppard

[margoleon]

I drafted this scene for a much longer fic I’m writing, but then I realised it didn’t really fit, plot-wise. I didn’t want to scrap it, so here it is; free from the constrains of having to follow a bigger plot it got ridiculously fluffy.

----

When James got home from work Francis had been on the phone, probably discussing something about his funding, judging by the clipped, no-nonsense tone of his voice and the wry smile he gave James when he peeked inside the office door.

About forty minutes later, he was lounging on the couch when he heard the familiar thud of steps approaching from the stairs.

“Hello, you,” said Francis’ voice as two broad hands circled his shoulders.

“Hey.”

“How was your day?”

“Regular Tuesday,” James shrugged.

“Are you too busy?” asked Francis after dropping a kiss on his hair.

James shook his head and tilted his head for a proper kiss. He had just finished grading some papers and was now fooling around on his phone. “Just clearing my head before starting on the new chapter.”

“You got time to help me practice? Speaking.”

James perked up. He always loved it when Francis asked him for help with his Portuguese. They were traveling to Rio in November to enjoy the early spring before it was too hot, and Francis had insisted he didn’t want to be a useless tourist and have his boyfriend translate everything for him. So he was taking Portuguese classes three times a week and James loved him all the more for it.

“Com muito prazer, meu bem,” he agreed with a radiant smile before putting the phone down and getting to his feet. “Vamos.”

They stepped into their shared office. Francis’ desk always neat and orderly, James’ a bit less so with a stack of notebooks and dictionaries rising messily on one corner. The room was on the cramped side but still had enough space for a set of twin armchairs and a small table by the window. Soon they would have their own offices, though. They were moving to a house they’d bought together, with a big bedroom and two offices and a large yard for Neptune to frolic around to his heart’s content. Between paperwork and some minor overhauling, it would be a couple of months yet, but just the thought of it, their house, always left James giddy with joy and anticipation.

“When’s your test?” he asked as he went to sit on one of the armchairs.

“In a couple of days but I don’t know if I’ll have the chance to practice after today.”

James smiled, fondly. Francis was as methodical and diligent at this as he was with his research and his equations. He read every assigned word in the text book, wrote down every piece of grammar, never skipped an exercise.

“We have to recount that short story we read in class and then the conversation bit. I hope I get paired with Parveen, she never tries to hog the time,” Francis chattered as he went to retrieve his notebook from his desk and came back to sit on the other armchair, “anyway, I could use some help with my questions, I still get muddled with the interrogative.”

“Alright, ready when you are, love.”

“Ok, let’s see.” He squinted as his notebook before sitting up straight and clearing his throat. It was thoroughly endearing. “O professor fica muito tempo no Brasil?”

Is the professor staying long in Brazil? James chuckled at the question. It was the exact kind of rehearsed, almost artificial sentence every language learner had to plough through at some point. He gave a small nod to signal that both the grammar and the pronunciation were correct. As with everything he applied himself to, Francis was excellent at shaping the words of James’ mother tongue.

“Sim,” he answered, and then proceeded to relate the professor’s complete travel schedule; wouldn’t hurt for Francis to get some listening practice while they were at it. They exchanged a few more comments about the fictional trip of this fictional man before Francis moved on to the next question.

“Posso recebê-la amanhã. Pode ser?” I can see you tomorrow. Is that good? Francis frowned. “Pode ser? Is the tense right?”

James nodded enthusiastically. “Perfeito, amor.”

“Alright, next. This one’s a bit tricky,” Francis squinted at his notebook again before turning back to James with a small, tentative smile. “Você quer casar comigo?”

Would you marry— James’ heart stuttered to a sudden halt before galloping like a wild horse inside his chest.

“James, você quer casar comigo?” Francis repeated with a hopeful smile. “Did I say it right?” James was still struck speechless; he wasn’t even sure he was breathing. Maybe fearing his silence meant he thought this was still part of the exercise, Francis pushed the notebook aside and leaned closer. “James, would you—”

“Yes. Yes!” He wasn’t even conscious of moving but he found himself leaping to straddle Francis’ lap. “Of course I will. Francis. Francis, te amo muitíssimo,” he mumbled against Francis’ lips, cradling that dear face in his hands, “of course I’ll marry you. I’ll marry you right now. What do we need? Let me just get my shoes and—”

Francis’ arms had caught him without hesitation and now tightened around his waist before he could move away. “We can’t get married right now, you ridiculous thing,” he said with a delighted peal of laughter.

Yes, James was dimly aware there was a whole weeks-long bureaucratic process they needed to follow but he couldn’t help the little forlorn whine that escaped him.

“I’m sure you’ll want a party,” Francis offered as consolation. He leaned back to brush his thumb against James’ cheekbone. “I thought that, when we move into the new house I’d like to do a proper job of carrying you over the threshold.”

James had to kiss him again. When they drew back, Francis had taken something from his cardigan pocket. It was a white gold ring, James recognised it as a Claddagh ring, exquisitely made. He offered his left hand and as Francis slid it onto his finger, heart pointing out, James was reassured to see their hands were trembling equally hard.

“There,” Francis said in an awed whisper. “You’re mine to keep now.”

I already was, thought James fervently. He pressed their foreheads together. “I really wish I could marry you right this second.”

“So do I.” Francis brushed a kiss to the corner of his mouth. “We can go give notice first thing tomorrow morning. If you want.”

“Yes, please, yes,” he hissed as he tilted his head to welcome the kisses Francis was pressing to the column of his neck.

“That new chapter you were working on, is it really urgent?” Francis asked, his voice rough and sultry against James’ skin, “or can it wait while I make love to you?”

James huffed out a breathless laugh even as he felt his stomach tightening with desire. “As if I could string two words together right now.” He shook his head, he got to his feet, pulling Francis along. “Take me to bed.”

[purplesurveys]

998

survey by starsareonly2nd

How many text messages are currently in your inbox? I don’t know if my phone can provide that particular feature. Suffice it to say there’s a ton because I don’t really do spring cleaning with my texts and I’ve kept messages since getting this phone in 2018.

Is your profile picture in color or black & white? All my profile photos have been in color, and I think I’ve only had to have a black and white photo once.

What's your favorite Christmas movie? Love Actually.

Did you dress up for Halloween this year? If so, what were you? We’re gonna be having a virtual Halloween party at work on Wednesday and I’m thinking of just going as Dora the Explorer again since I wasn’t able to maximize my costume last year anyway (the Halloween party I had gone to didn’t allow shorts - wtf? so I ended up wearing orange pants and looking nothing like Dora) and this time around I also actually have bangs to complete the look. But idk, the party announcement says we also have 30 seconds each to impersonate the character, and I'm just not extroverted enough for individual presentations like that. I’m heavily leaning towards skipping the entire thing because of that one instruction, but we’ll see.

Are there any posters in your room? Of what? Yuh, Nam Joo Hyuk.

Do you read Rolling Stone? I don’t think I ever have.

Which Harry Potter book (if you read them) was your favorite? I read up until the blue book, but I don’t remember which one I had enjoyed reading the most. I do remember breezing through one of them and finishing in just a couple of hours, so I’d say that was my favorite.

Do you have any stuffed animals you still sleep with? No.

What kind of cell phone do you own? iPhone.

Do you have any pets? Yes :)

Are there currently any accessories in your hair? Sure, a hair tie.

Are you involved with any clubs at your school? I was in two organizations in college andddd in high school it was mandatory to be in a club, so I was in one for each year.

Do you have an MP3 player? What kind? I used to own an iPod Nano.

What's your favorite sport to watch on TV? Wrestling!!! My first love, forever and always.

How many people live with you? Four. Parents and two siblings.

Are you good at any styles of dance? Haha, I wish. I’m a terrible dancer.

Do you think that your hair looks better curly or straight? Neither. It’s best when it’s wavy.

Where was your default taken? It’s not a photo of me, first of all. It’s from an episode of Bojack but I can’t remember which episode it’s form.

Have you ever been to another country? Yeah, several times.

Do you prefer cats or dogs? Dogs.

What was the last thing you ate? Kwek-kwek. My grandma made so many pieces for us when she came over yesterday <3

What's your desktop background? It’s of a mountain range and is one of the provided backgrounds in my laptop.

What was the last movie you saw at a theater? For the billionth time, Knives Out.

Did you think it was a good movie? No, but I’m biased because I hate that genre. I’m fairly sure it was well-received and that it’s objectively a good movie.

Are you afraid of spiders? The ones we have here are super tiny and look pretty harmless, so no. But I’ve seen how freaky spiders can look like in other countries and I understand why so many people are terrified of them.

Did you carve a pumpkin this year? If so, what did you carve into it? No, we don’t practice that here.

Which Disney movie is your favorite? Toy Story makes me the happiest.

Are you the youngest, oldest, middle, or only child? Eldest.

If your power were to suddenly go out right now, how would you react? Annoyed at the inconvenience, but glad that my laptop is at 88% and that I have a bunch of tabs with surveys so I can at least do something; unbothered because the weather is cold; and pleased that I have enough mobile data to keep myself from getting bored. Overall I wouldn’t mind it, hahaha

Do you enjoy photography? I don’t enjoy doing it, but I like looking at photos, sure.

What's your favorite thing to do at the beach? Swim and allowing myself to relax and let go in the water.

Are you afraid of heights? Not for most situations, but if I had to do an extreme stunt or dare that involved heights then yeah it would.

If someone were to cut you in line at a store, would you speak up? No, but I’d take a photo of their back and share it on social media and call them an asshole to release my annoyance. I’d probably try to sneakily elbow them as well, just so I can sleep soundly at night.

Are there any foods you enjoy baking/cooking? No.

What website would you say you visit the most? Definitely YouTube.

What book are you currently reading? [continued from yesterday] I don’t think it’s still fair to say I’m reading Midnight Sun anymore. I haven’t opened it in about a month now, even though it’s constantly on my desk just right beside the laptop I work on.

Is it for school or just because you want to read? It’s because I do want to read it and because I like Twilight hehe. I’m not in school.

Are you going to any concerts in the future that you know of? I’m just waiting for my third Paramore show, whenever that is; but otherwise no and I have no clue who or when the first post-Covid concert is going to be.

Do you play any instruments? No. I can play some tunes on the piano but it’s cheating and I don’t count it, because I’ve only memorized which keys to press and I don’t actually know how to read notes or use the proper fingering.

Are you looking forward to the new Alice in Wonderland movie? This question is so cute considering it’s been a literal decade since that movie came out...anyway, no, I didn’t look forward to it as I’m not a fan of the genre.

Do you get seasick? I do but I can handle my stomach for the most part. The only time it got really bad was during my cruise, and the only reason I didn’t throw up was my dad has a cabin at the bottom floor of the ship, where the shaking was a lot weaker.

When was the last time you hung out with your friends? This is so painful to read lol...last week of February.

Do you drink soda on a regular basis? Nopes.

Are you currently wearing a hoodie? No but I can do with one right now to feel cozy. I just don’t feel like getting out of my chair.

What's the weirdest food you've ever eaten? Gulab jamun was personally a unique experience, but weird has a negative connotation so I’m avoiding that word.

What was the last sporting event you attended? I think it was like a UP/Ateneo volleyball game, which was the only type of UAAP event I attended anyway.

Do you understand Shakespeare? Nope, that’s why I got books that had the modern-day translations right beside the original text lol. I mean I would probably be able to understand it if I exerted time and effort into reading Shakespeare, but I don’t have either, so.

Is there a bookshelf in your room? Nah but the top of my closet acts like one.

Do you need to wear glasses at all? Yes, all the time.

What's your favorite genre of books? Anything non-fiction, so books on history, memoirs, etc.

Do you think it's too early for Christmas music? Not in the Philippines. Christmas for us starts in September :) Anyone’s free to put up Christmas trees and lights or listen to Christmas music as soon as the clock strikes 12 midnight on September 1st.

What's the longest you've ever gone without speaking? Maybe during my dark days in 6th grade? I was super depressed, had no friends, had a strained relationship with my entire famly, and was holed up in my room all day long. It’s very possible I went several days without talking then.

Does your house have a garden? I wouldn’t call it a garden but we do have several trees and plants around the house, yes.

What color is the shirt you are wearing? It’s multi-colored stripes.

Do you know what brand of toothpaste you use? Colgate.

When was the last time you were on an airplane? Early 2019.

Do you have a permit or license? A driver’s license, yes.

Did you walk any long distances today? Nope. So far I’ve only gone down to the kitchen to fix myself a cup of coffee.

Are you currently wearing any make-up? I’m not.

How do you feel about bands covering old pop music? I personally don’t like most covers but I don’t take it against the bands. I just won’t listen to those versions.

Are your nails painted? Never are.

Do you use correct grammar online? Sure, unless I want to use bad grammar on purpose.

Do you agree with the statement that Miley Cyrus is a bad role model? I don’t think she even ever claimed to be one, so that’s an unfair accusation. I personally never had a problem with her and I admire her confidence and boldness in her performances and other things she does. Slide Away in particular is a very beautiful song.

Do you give out cards on Valentine's Day? No.

What are you listening to right now? I can hear the wind lightly blowing outside, but thankfully it’s no longer as violent as yesterday.

[magic-and-moonlit-wings]

Chapter 44: Scrapbooking

Bold italics are trollish.

This story is NOT back on its old weekly update schedule! Chapter 43 was a week late, and I happened to finish this chapter 'on time' and decided to update to match the alternate-Fridays that I wrote on my calendar. The next chapter will be two weeks from now unless it's late again instead.

Becoming The Mask

+=+

Bagdwella had offered the two human girls a seat on the box spring mattress that she had not yet disassembled to get at its bed coils, but Mary and Darci had turned her down. Instead they were sitting back-to-back on the short wooden bench that Bagdwella stood on to reach high shelves. Apparently there were tiny insects that sometimes lived in old mattresses and the humans didn't want to risk the parasites crawling into their clothes.

Each girl was writing something. Sometimes Mary referred to her phone before making notes. Darci would pause and tap her chin with her pen before returning to her papers.

"How do you spell 'divorce'?" Mary asked. They had a dictionary with them, but Darci was using it.

Bagdwella spelled it out, carefully enunciating the runes for the girl to copy down. Mary chirped a quick "Thank you!" and ducked back down over her notebook.

The humans had come earlier that night, asking if they could work on whatever they were doing in Bagdwella's backroom. She suspected it was some kind of assignment from Blinky. Or perhaps a surprise for him, since they weren't working on it in the library.

The silly man had such a dry, academic way of teaching language. Bagdwella simply had to take it upon herself to step in and teach these whelps how to converse like proper trolls. Blinky was a better choice for writing lessons, though, being one of the few people she knew who read for enjoyment.

Oh, she could appreciate good record-keeping, and in a more abstract way she understood the value of collecting knowledge, but stories just felt stilted to her when they were written down instead of spoken.

Why Mary needed that particular word, Bagdwella couldn't fathom – had the human mistranslated something? Should she have asked her what she thought it meant in English?

"What is it you two are up to?" the shopkeeper finally asked.

"Translating stories about our families," said Mary. "This one is about how my parents got divorced and my mother got married again. She was smart, the second time. She insisted they get … premarital counselling. If Mom and Dad had bothered with that, they might have realized they shouldn't get married before they did."

"But then you might not exist," pointed out Darci.

"I'm not saying there wasn't a silver lining."

Bagdwella didn't know what lining something with silver had to do with anything. It didn't have a very appealing flavour, and the shades it developed when tarnished were pretty but not enough to make up for the metal's relative softness, so trolls didn't use it much in food, tools, or decor. It was probably a human saying. She was pretty sure they considered most metals valuable.

"What is premarital counselling?" she asked instead.

"Uh … counselling, before marriage?" Mary explained haltingly. "When people, who want to get married, talk, to … sometimes a leader, an Elder, like Vendel. Sometimes a … therapist … like a medic, but for thoughts and feelings. A person whose job it is, to make sure people who want to get married talk about … the things people should talk about before marriage. Things people who don't talk will fight about because they don't agree but did not know."

Bagdwella nodded thoughtfully. "Your parents did not do this, but your mother and her next spouse did?"

"Yes, exactly."

"That is …" Darci frowned in a way Bagdwella was learning to recognize, the furrow-browed looking-up expression of a human who knew what they wanted to say but didn't know the word for it. "That's kind of heavy, don't you think?" Darci said in English instead. "I write – written – am writing, about my older brother teaching me to drive."

"I need to explain why the divorce. My parents both are good people who learn from their mistakes. They did not divorce because one did something bad."

+=+

Claire knocked once on the nursery door, a hard thump, before entering.

"I need you to check my trollish." She shoved a three-ring binder at the Changeling.

"Uh?" said Enrique, not dropping his human face.

"For the love of," Claire muttered, not specifying what she was invoking the love of. "Fine. You know what, fine. Please check my trollish."

Enrique shapeshifted obligingly and took the binder. "Was that so hard?" he teased. He made a show of examining the angular squiggles, turning the first few pages with a solemn expression, and then handed the book back to her. "Looks troll-y to me."

She rolled her eyes and pushed it towards him again. "I meant see if my grammar's okay and I spelled everything right."

"I'm not much for spelling. And yeh'd have to read it out for the grammar bit."

"… What, you can't read?"

"I'm picking up English and Spanish okay," he said defensively, gesturing to the shelf of storybooks.

"Jim can read trollish."

"Yeah, well, Jim is a madman who thought it was worth the risk, annoying Gunmar's advisor like that. Plus he's had Strickler and the other Mister Six Eyes to keep the lessons up since he left."

"Left? Left where? The Darklands," she answered her own question. "But, wait, I still don't get it. If you guys are supposed to be spies, why didn't anyone teach you to read and write?"

"If we're s'posed to be spying on fleshbags, what'd we need to read in troll for?"

"Ciphers?" she suggested immediately. "I mean, it's still a language so it's still got patterns, but it would take longer for a human to decrypt one if it's not based on a human language."

"… Some of the higher-ups know it. Could be why the rest of us don't." Make it a status thing. Control access to information.

Or maybe Claire was just smarter about spy stuff than Gunmar was.

+=+

"So, we've been thinking about what you said," said Darci to Blinky. "And you're right. We went too fast, suggesting to Vendel that he should let us tell our families about trolls."

"And yet somehow I find myself suspecting that you are not telling me this as a precursor to setting that goal aside."

"We're asking him, all of you really, to trust complete strangers just because we vouch for them. And that wasn't fair. And there's not exactly a way for a troll to get to know a human without secrets coming out."

"Or is there?" said Mary dramatically.

Claire handed Blinky the binder he'd noticed she was holding behind her back. "We've collected some pictures of our families, for putting faces to names, and we're writing down stories about them – you know, anecdotes. Memories. Stuff they've done and that shows what kind of people they are. We're going to get Toby in on it, too. Maybe Jim, if he's got anything that can calm Vendel down about Dr Lake knowing already."

"And once Vendel knows everyone by proxy," continued Mary, "he should be more okay with actually meeting them."

Blinky took the binder cautiously. It wasn't heavy, and the stiff covers closed triangularly around the pages. Perhaps twenty pages, he estimated, which was quite respectable considering these three could only have been working on it for a few days.

It was divided, inside, with tabs to skip directly to any of the families described therein. The first section was Darci's family.

Several pages of photos grinned toothily out at him, captioned with names written in both the humans' Roman alphabet and phonetic trollish transliteration, and sub-captioned with each human's relationship to Darci. Mother, father, older brother; three living grandparents, plus one in a group picture who was noted to be deceased; and a maternal aunt and uncle and two cousins, with a note clarifying that Darci did not expect Vendel to agree to meet her entire family, only that knowing who these four humans were would help the stories make sense.

Blinky restricted himself to skimming only the title of each anecdote, though it was tempting to thoroughly read the one about the driving lesson right away, and move on to the section about Mary's family.

This section followed the same format. Blinky was impressed and proud that they'd managed to write almost the entire thing in trollish. He turned to the section on Claire's family and, three pages in, froze up.

The photo had to be of the Changeling that the humans had taken to calling Not Enrique – yes, that was how the caption identified him – lit by the blueish glow of the crystal staircase. The picture was lower quality than the others, as though the camera weren't as good, or as if it were a close-up of a larger picture.

Blinky already knew the Changeling had gotten into Trollmarket. They hadn't exchanged words yet, but he'd met the boy. And from his interactions with Jim, Blinky had really thought he was at peace with the idea that Changelings could be allies; friends; (perhaps family).

He should not be reacting to this image with the degree of shock and horror that he felt – this sense of no – this sense of wrong.

"I … do not think admitting to Vendel that one of your family members is known to be a Changeling will reassure him that it is safe to trust the rest of your relations."

"But he should take it better if we come clean than if he finds out later, right?" said Claire. "I don't think any of us can pull off acting like he got swapped after we tell our parents what's going on. And Jim said Vendel knows he's a Changeling."

"I honestly can't say what Vendel's reaction will be. But I can say," closing the book firmly, "that this was a highly dangerous picture to bring to Trollmarket." Hard evidence of Changelings amongst them …

Well, very strong circumstantial evidence. One slightly out-of-focus picture of a young troll with a handwritten caption claiming the youngling was a Changeling was hardly a compelling case.

It could still be enough to have Claire imprisoned on suspicion of conspiring with Changelings, since she had brought 'her little brother' to Trollmarket while knowing what he was. And from there, the Trollhunter's identity could be exposed, and even Vendel's protection – Vendel's collusion with the conspiracy to allow a Changeling Trollhunter to live and to operate freely – would likely not be enough to save Jim's life; and probably the best Blinky could hope for himself would be banishment.

"Okay," said Darci, jolting him out of his thoughts. "So what if we took the stuff about Not Enrique out for now, and told Vendel later? Do you think learning more about our families would help convince him?"

"… Possibly," Blinky conceded.

+=+

Previous Chapter (Various characters try to comfort Toby in the aftermath of a nightmare)

Table of Contents

Next Chapter (Barbara finds out Draal has been living in her basement)

You would not believe how long an internal debate I had about whether Enrique would say 'spy stuff' or 'espionage strategy' in his own head. 

On the one hand, inside his head he's got no one to perform for except himself, and so he doesn't need to dumb himself down to remain underestimated. 

On the other hand, speech patterns can affect thought patterns and it sounds weird phrasing it like that when the scene is supposed to be in his voice.

[mockky]

A sad story how Russo bros reminded us about the crappy world we live in

Disclaimer (kinda). Preventing the arguments like “read the comic-book to understand the movie”. First of all I've never read the comics and never will. I shouldn't do that to watch a movie. It's the director's job to tell me a story. It can be changed a bit, but it still has to have a logic. This is author's priority.

I guess there's no need to run through the movie again and get to details, it's too many of them. Just a few big ones. Firstly, the time travel idea is pretty lame by itself. Every time-travel-movie does the same mistakes – PARADOXES, no one managed to escape it. So if you can solve your problem only by time travel – please don't do the movie, this job is not for you.

It's like the creators don't know the rules of their own universe. Nebula translates her thoughts to Past-Nebula, they're connected somehow even being far from each other, killing Past-Nebula literally doesn't do anything. How does it work? All this plan just fucked up the previous movies. And then some random rat actually saves the universe? Seriously? I don't know but I think it’s called “lazy writing”.

OK, there's no movie without a sin. But what's really important is the screwed up characters. No one did or got anything what one was supposed to.

Loki. His extremely stupid, reckless and suicidal lunge actually was extremely stupid, reckless and suicidal. The God of Guile threw himself with a toothpick against titan and dropped dead. Bravo!

Thor. I never really was a fan of him. But this is officially the worst comic-relief ever. Why he should be like some sort of that whiny drunk dumbass, especially after him being so cool and strong in Infinity war? Gods saved us from fart-jokes and slow-mo-food-fight. Thor lost his parents, lost his brother and Asgard. He's broken and crushed, and Marvel just points finger at him and laughs. Very mature.

Doctor Strange showed up to show us a very important finger.

Captain Marvel is a whole new level of pain in the ass. Skip the Boring-IMBP-part. Though it's hard to forget how they just shoved her in fan's throats, and expected them to have the same empathy for her as for Tony or Cap. But we know them for 10 damn years! The biggest problem that she's not a person, she is God ex machine with magic GPS in her head, invincible, strong-independent-woman and all. With that cockish face of hers, kicked Thanos's ass, but when it comes to the gauntlet, it's up to Hulk and Tony. What da hell? All that power, it's the only thing she could help with. And don't give me that "it's a big universe, not only you've got problems" crap. Thanos's snap affected THE WHOLE universe. Isn't he the main threat here and now?

And what really pissed me of is the ending and the way it fucked up the most interesting and deep part of it all – Steve and Bucky.

Allow me to remind you few points.

CATFA

We see Steve as this tiny subtle guy with heart of gold and strong will, he is hero inside. I can do this all day. He wanted to go to war, he took the serum, he's like walking embodiment of self-sacrifice and heroism. But he became “the chorus girl”, this empty symbol, a fake. Actual soldiers don't believe and don't respect him, cuz he’s never been in real fight. He does not respect himself anymore. But when his friend got in danger in the blink of an eye Steve transforms into this Rambo, alone against the world, flipped like a switch. He dashed headlong to the enemy's base just for tiny possibility his friend might be alive. At that very moment Steve becomes what he meant to be – the real Captain America.

CATWS

Steve managed to get through 70 years of brainwashing with only one phrase, and refused to fight Winter soldier hoping that there was still Bucky somewhere. The entire movie revolves around two of them.

CATCW

Some fans said that Cap and Tony should switch sides on this one, but it doesn't feel right for me. Cap's got a point. What if there's somewhere we need to go, and they don't let us. Obviously it is CATFA reference, where he goes against orders to save Bucky. And he's afraid cuz he knows that it could cost lives. And now he's running around the city protecting Bucky from the government and T'Chala. He fights Tony, bloodily, everything to protect Bucky.

What a lovely deep drama! It's a comic-book story here we’re talking about. I bet in CATFA no one really noticed sweet little Bucky. But the Winter soldier just stole the movie and fan's hearts. Steve and Bucky have this strong almost cosmic bonds, it's stronger than brotherhood or friendship, it was so since 40s. After all this freezing thing they became totally unique for each other. You can smash vibranium shield with that bonds (which Cap actually does symbolically when gives up the shield TWICE, both times for Bucky). It's unbelievable that after all he did for Bucky Cap could ditch Bucky for anyone or anything. Creators teased the fans and encouraged that bromance. It was openly a queer-baiting, it was a canon, and you can't stop the shippers.

Three movies were built up on this relationship. It was work of art if you ask me – so many details, so much depth, and the amaizing acting, I mean you can watch it over and over, and every time you find something new in their eyes or words. And they not just talk, they actually do anything to proof their devotion to each other. It's absolutely beautiful. And it's Bucky who made Steve interesting and alive as a movie character and a real hero as a person.

And what we get in the end? Bucky turned into dust in front of Steve, but on the group meeting Steve talks about... Peggy? Where did it come from? He doesn't mention Bucky the whole movie. Steve goes to return the Infinity stones and comes back an old man. For us, for Bucky, it was 5 sec, but for Steve it was 70+ years. He left Bucky and lived 70+ years without him. Besides he never said Bucky about his plan (or just desire or whatever), didn't say a proper goodbye, didn't consider it as a betrayal. He just decided to live for himself. By the way Bucky reacted as if it was a big surprise for him and even bigger disappointment. He was anxious during that scene when Steve suddenly didn't show up on the platform. And if you wanna say “Bucky knew it was gonna happen and was happy for his friend” then it's the great time to keep your mouth shut. He obviously wasn't happy with it, and he didn't know. Post-movie interviews don’t count! Don’t tell me that it was off-screen. It’s a MOVIE! If something is important – it’s on the screen and it becomes a canon. Stupid scene in a cafe with selfie and kids IS on the screen, apparently it’s important af and it’s a canon. Fat greasy-haired Thor yells at some gamer in chat – that’s VERY important and it’s a canon. But a talk between best friends when one of them decided to leave the other for good and go to the past doesn’t deserve screen time. Are you sure you set your priorities right? By the way Sebastian asked Russo about this. He thought there would be some dialogue between Steve and Bucky, but director said No, you already had that conversation.

No wonder Bucky didn't approach to Steve and only looked from distance. What can you possibly say to the man who claimed himself your best friend and then easily abandoned you just like that, lived without you for 70+ years and apparently was OK with it.

Steve just goes to Peggy. Because that's how it must be, that's natural, that's happiness. This cliché stuck so deep in the people minds, so they can't see anything behind it. I'm sure that not so many people knows what it actually means, but they believe that it's the right thing.

I might blow few minds now. Here it goes – the closest person is the one who shares with you your life experience, not the bed. NO WAY! I'm not saying than your partner can't be your friend. Spouses are not always the closest friends and the closest friends are not always spouses. You just can't screw up all Steve's emotional baggage that related to Bucky just for Peggy, which was in Steve's life, what, like 15 minutes? Steve knows Bucky since childhood, they were best friends, they supported each other, lived together, protected and saved each other many times. They share the same fate (war, serum, man out of time), there's no one who can be closer. “He loves her so much!” arguments can't erase too much of a history. It just doesn't work that way! You can't exchange one for another. A loved one can't replace your best friend, cuz of damn emotional baggage! You can have both, you can have none, but you can't trade it!

And what about Peggy? CATFA-Peggy was not a good person actually. She's whimsical and eccentric damsel. For example she shoots 1) at the experimental read not properly tested shield 2) with a chance to kill someone by ricochet 3) in enclosed space without ears protection for her or everyone else; she punches a soldier for an inappropriate commentary. And the scene in the bar shows Peggy as a simply impolite person – she ignores the soldier who just got back from captivity, it's very rude, especially when Bucky was polite with her. And on top of this I think she picked interest in Steve only after the serum. I bet Pre-serum-Steve was friendzoned for the rest of his life.

In TV-series though she appears to have a strong personality. She is an interesting character and not just love interest for Steve. She founded the S.H.I.E.L.D., had a happy fulfilled life. She let Steve go. And when she died, Steve let her go. I don't believe for a one second she is the love of his life. Staring at the photo is NOT a depiction of love. Not in my book. It's just a woman Steve once kissed.

So what went wrong? They made such a great Steve's character development, they put so much in his relationship with Bucky. Countless details, shades and layers. Every scene, every dialogue. An all of it just... puff... vanished.

Actually it wasn't so sudden as it seems. First signs of it appeared in Civil war. Did you noticed how the creators put the distance between Bucky and Steve? It's like “Hey guys! You know this whole story gets kinda pansy. We stand for cliché, for heteronormativity and happy ends! Every man got a girl! You can't have best friend, not the same sex, only hetero! So quit with the hugs end eye-fucking, more masculinity! Sebastian, you must get as thick as you can, so nobody could say you're gay. And Steve's gonna make out with a girl, just to be safe”. And this kissing scene is the most awkward I've ever seen. This weird kiss out of the blue, the fact that Sam and Bucky are watching (BTW how often do you stare at your friends kissing? Please, share at the comment section). Even actors call this scene awkward and weird, they basically hate it. And in fact that this scene wasn't it the script, it was added much later.

Then the forced friendship between Bucky and Sam. Moreover, they tried to replace Steve'n'Bucky's friendship with it. Sam rather has a chemistry with Steve, not Bucky. And the way Mackie and Stan here and there together on comic-cons where Mackie acts like he's Stan's BBF and Stan's just embarrassed. This whole all of a sudden friendship thing feels so unnatural and stretched. It's not like I don't wanna Bucky has friends and all, adaptation and stuff, But it doesn't mean Bucky doesn't need Steve, no one can replace him. And it all was only to make their friendship NO HOMO. But the way I see it, there wasn't anything gay about them (BTW I'm not a shipper and not homophobic), just some people have dead opossum's emotional range. In their head the man wants either bang you or kill you, nothing in between. I'm sure nobody took seriously the idea that they make them gay, or that they look like gay. It's just bromance. But noooooooo. They must've done this to them, cuz Happily ever after.

Eventually we got what we got. In Endgame Steve and Bucky are barely shares the screen together, even if they actually next to each other, they don't hug, don't talk, don't even look. Even after Bucky got back from the dust. It's like they never cared for each other.

Steve considered Bucky recovered after being tortured and brainwashed for 70 (it still blows my mind how long it is!) years, he's OK. No one said he's OK though, even Bucky himself. He's still the same wrecked man lost in time and his own head with tremendous weight of guilt and torn apart personality. It's not the same Bucky from 40es, and he never will be. Steve’s the only one who could break through to him, for Bucky Steve is like the ground he stands, the only guide light in this chaos that left of his life. According to Stan – Steve is the only thing that keeps Bucky alive. Well, Bucky, sorry pal, gun or rope?

Steve is an asshole. He thinks he's so special and good enough to rewrite Peggy's life (which was good for Peggy without Steve) just because he wants it. Abandons Bucky, who has nothing but Steve, abandons the world he fought for and called his home, and the friends called family. All this for the woman, who was almost nothing to him especially compared with Bucky and the others. All the things Peggy said in a hospital, all the character development and his words about the man died in the ice, new home and new family – all of it was fucked up, buried under that shit. You need to move on. Until you get a time machine. Then you can go back. So what is it? Maybe Steve never was a hero and hence he doesn't deserve our respect. Or, what is the most likely, creators think we are idiots.

Steve gives the shield to Sam. And I wouldn't mind. Why not. This job definitely is not for Bucky. He's tired, he's semi-stable 100 years old man, he had enough of war for two lifetimes. It's too much for him, it would be cruel for Bucky. Symbolism is a cool thing, but life doesn't work that way. Pep-talks don't heal. Get real, OK? Sam is a new Cap, fine, it's logical. But it's always about the How, not What.

From the moment Bucky sees the old man on the bench til the end of the movie Bucky didn't even think about to approach Steve, he sent Sam instead. They didn't talk, Steve didn't even look at him. This entire scene Bucky has this endless sadness in his eyes. There's a glimpse of a smile when he looks at Sam, but in the moment it's gone. And then it's pain and sorrow on his face again. I don't really see happy Bucky. 

Just look at his eyes and tell me you look the same when you’re happy

And actually Steve doesn't sparkle with joy either. He kinda lived his “happy life”, but there's no sign of it, especially that he refused to talk about her. 

But it's confirmed information – Peggy's mysterious husband IS Steve Rogers.In the end Bucky got this last slap on his face. Bucky asked himself if he worth all of it. NO. No, Bucky, fuck you.

I find it funny (seriously I don't) that it's the same directors and screenwriters, who did Winter soldier and Civil war. How could they screw it up? One might say “Cuz there's TV-series Falcon and Winter soldier coming, it needs to be this way”.

A few little ideas for ending that wouldn't do any harm.

Behold!

1.  If they want Steve out of it, why don't kill him? Canonic, right?

1.1 In final battle Steve is dying. He tried to shield Bucky and dying on his arms. He can give the shield to Bucky, so his broken and lost friend could have purpose in life that helps him to move on. Or he can just die and Bucky takes the shield as something in memory of Steve. And then Bucky gives the shield to Sam, like saying “I've lost it all, I've lost my friend, but you're a good guy and maybe we can become friends sometime”. If it happened like this I could in time accept Sam as a new Cap and Bucky's friend.

1.2 Or perhaps Steve, still dying, gives the shield to Sam.

2. This one is not so good idea, but OK. Steve goes to the past, his a douche. But if you want a TV-series he can’t take Bucky with him. And it's still the same – Steve gives the shield, doesn't matter who would it be (pick anyone you like). But Steve can’t leave without saying goodbye.

Oh my god! It's two of it and we still got the TV show! Fascinating! And there is more of it.

3. Oh that's the good one. The one with the Steve we know and love. Steve stays. Steve goes to the past to return the infinity stones. Steve could allow himself just a moment to be selfish and have that dance with Peggy, or stay for not so long, a year maybe. And then he must go back, knowing that there are people who need him more, than Peggy. Of course if Steve is young, fit and tight, he won't retire. But Sam and Bucky are still with us, they're cool enough to have a TV-show.      

4. And what if like this? Shuri did the research to find a way to clear Bucky's head from the Hydra's code. What if she did? Or what if with Hydra's code some memories are gone too? Maybe Bucky could be an antagonist.

And just for me. We don't care about the money, and give Steve and Bucky the final they deserve.

1. Bucky and Steve dying fighting together. The most obvious and sad final. Till the end of the line

2. Bucky dies. It's tragic for Steve and he could say “I've lost it all”, and goes to Peggy. A little OOC, but not so bad.

3. What if we go back to that brain-cleaning option? Steve dies, but Bucky's so broken he can't stand it, and he goes to Shuri so she could wipe up his memory. Tragically and symbolically, cuz first time he was forced to forget Steve's alive, and now he does it voluntarily to forget Steve's dead.

I'm not a screenwriter, and my head's not crowded with ideas. But this is still better than what we've got in the Endgame. I could step on my own throat and accept the Endgame only if Bucky says that Steve is a traitor and he hates him. I'm not saying that Steve doesn't deserve this dance or happy ending. He does. Everybody Does. Everybody've suffered enough. But Steve doesn't deserve to become such an asshole. Bucky doesn't deserve to be forsaken in such a way. 

Honestly, I don't care about forced bromance with Sam, or Sharon, even love interest for Bucky (it would be kinda specific I guess). They could do anything, but they can't throw away Bucky and Steve. These characters are alive, their world is real. Sometimes happy ending is impossible. And if you force it, you can ruin everything. And this is what they actually did.

And it just bugs me – why, why did they do this? Maybe it's too much pressure and they screwed up. Or maybe it's Big studio' bosses. You know maybe if they just shut up about it.. time heals you know. But it gets worse. On the interview directors says one thing and screenwriters say the other, they all can't string sentense together. And only Bucky's face speaks for himself. I mean did you see this fresh Sebastian's panel at London comic-con? I’ll show you few moments, but you've got to watch the whole thing (https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=5&v=-KQpzG49exM). When he asks the audience did they like the movie, many people say “No!”, when he approves the final of Endgame one shout “Liar!”. Look at the body language. You'll see how he sincerely and emotionally talks about anything.  As soon as it comes to Endgame, he is immediately clamped, his leg begins to twitch.

The previous question was that he was interested in - what kind of heroes he wants to play. Therefore, he sits on the edge of the couch, leaning over to the public. The next question about the final and Steve going to Peggy. He immediately moves and leans back, he covers his belly with hand. The question is unpleasant to him.

Then the speech becomes confused, although before that it flowed freely, he literally gasps as if he doesn't know what to say, his micro-mimic denies his words.

He says he agrees with the final, Bucky is happy, Steve deserves it. But his body screams just the opposite - a sharp wave of his hand and chin say "no"

And this is the worst one. On the words “He (Bucky) was happy,” his whole pose just screams “NO!”. This insincere smile, this tilt of the head and a slight denying swaying. All this says more than any words

It's so obvious that he so tired of it. I bet that under the contract, he has no right to scold the movie and must promote the policy of the studio. But when he said that “Bucky was happy for Steve” .... This is the most forced smile I've ever seen. This is the most unconvincing lie in my memory. You can see just right through it, it's like an open book. But he has to do it, because crossing with the Big Studio Boss when your career just went uphill is not the best idea. The truth is important, but the dream is too. He started the career since the age of 15, which is quite long, considering this is not such a brilliant career, but he definitely worked so hard for it. So he caught between the hammer and an anvil now. On the one hand, acting career is the only thing for him, on the other hand studio bosses who can bury the dream, and on top of it the fans who are looking for his support. So "Steve is happy, Bucky is happy, awesome film, kill me, please!". By the way where is his best buddy Mackie? Why Seb's cleaning this mess all by himself? Seeing him like this just breaks my heart

And I honestly do not understand the people who liked it. How can you not see all this?? And there are those who claim that we didn’t like Endgame because we didn’t see any movies at all and didn’t read comic-books. There are Stucky fans who liked Endgame. Are the clichés so strong that people just don’t see all this... The story of Bucky and Steve was way too deep. Bucky is too tragic and well-developed character for a superhero comic-book story. All this deserved so much more. And the creators simply could not finish the job; mass cinema is simple and flat and it's made that way on purpose. They pull the most primitive triggers, so that people do not have to think. The most simple patterns help to reach more people. In other words, they are doing everything to raise more money. And it works. Thus we’ll get more of it in the future. No doubt about that.

For me, Endgame marked the victory of the corporate moneymaking machine over creativity. And the box office speaks for itself. It's an awful world to live in...

[nonpareiltactician]

{Church of Edda Meta}

{ ooc. Please be aware that this meta contains themes from the following things, due to references made in-game or in interviews: - Norse Mythology (or, at least, what was mentioned in the Prose Edda) - Catholicism

If these make you uncomfortable, I would not advise reading this. If you want to skip to a certain part, just search for one of the headings below:

History

Religious Texts

Hierarchy

Beliefs and Practices

Word Count: 1669}

History

The Church of Edda, otherwise known as the Edda Order, was a religion created by one of the twelve crusaders, Bragi, after the fall of the Loptuous Empire. While the faith served as an attempt to revive the continent’s primal Earthen religion, its main goal was to be something in which the followers of the Loptuous Church could easily turn and convert to, liberating them from the sect and offering an easier means to integrate into the land’s newly formed society. Aside from consisting of the Earthen gods, upon the Edda Order’s creation, the dragons present at the Miracle of Darna were added to the church’s hierarchy of gods, placing them below the original ones, but higher than the other deities that would follow. Having been raised on the teachings of Maera, and listening to the bishops of the Maerist faith, Bragi also decided to include Loptyr in the same category as the other dragon deities, although he is not often worshipped by those within the Church of Edda.

Upon his death, the cardinals working below Bragi, along with a majority of the public, decided that the crusaders should be included within the hierarchy of deities within the religion, and worshipped in the same manner as the other gods. Using a mix of their personality, and the holy weapon that was bestowed upon them, each crusader was added to the Edda Order’s ever-increasing list of gods, with Bragi taking centre-stage for those within the clergy. Due to coming into possession of Valkyrie, he was heralded as the one who controls fate and life—not the god of life itself, but instead one who governs the paths of the living—, and several more religious texts were written that heavily involve his teachings.

Religious Texts

     As the word ‘Edda’ derives itself from a collection of manuscripts called the ‘Prose Edda’—a series of poems recounting Norse Mythology—, the faith follows closely to its origin by having five main religious texts; the prologue, Gylfaginning, Bragarödur, Skáldskaparmál and Háttatal.

Prologue      Acts as a background for Gylfaginning, going into more detail about the creation of the world, and the birth of the higher-ranked gods. It starts off from the very beginning of the world, and after the creation story follows the history of Jugdral—particularly, the rise of the Loptyr Empire—, focusing mainly on the Miracle of Darna, and ending with the establishment of the kingdoms and duchies within the continent. This section was not written by Bragi, but instead cardinals from both the Edda Order and remaining Maerists alike after his death, working to provide a proper insight into the faith’s beliefs regarding creation, and to properly establish the twelve crusaders as being lower-tier gods of the religion. In their specific section, it  speaks of the Miracle of Darna, but then goes on to speak of the good they have done for the world during the Holy War, which places they took charge of, and speaks of the importance of their blood—the blood of the gods—being passed down.

Gylfaginning      Recites the old, Earthen religion’s take on how everything in the world came to be, and is the only book out of the four to have been written by Bragi himself. The text starts off much like its real-life counterpart-- with the creation of Jugdral coming about from one of the faith’s goddesses fooling the king of an unnamed land, and establishing the country on what she claimed. From here, the king then journeys to where he believes the gods and goddesses to reside—albeit, in this, he merely travels to where the divine dragons reside, believing them to be deities—, however his visit was foreseen by the dragons, and so they cast illusions upon themselves when he arrived, making themselves appear to be human, if only outwardly, to protect their tribe. The rest of the text details all of the gods and goddesses—some of which, in reality, were just normal dragons--, as well as the first mention of the highest-ranking deity, Gran, told through dialogue between the king and one of the divine dragons. The creation of the world, from the divine dragons’ point of view, was then shared, as well as the world’s destruction in the way they have seen it—the degeneration of dragonkind, which would result in the death of mankind as well.

     The distinction between dragons and gods is not made clearly in this text, and the word ‘god’ is often used to describe those that do appear in it. This is mainly due to the fact that, in the Earthen religion, there are many ranks of gods, and dragons fall beneath those who are credited as world creators, such as Gran and Ethnya, who are then followed by others. This hierarchy will be explained later on, however all are worshipped in similar manners.

Bragarödur      Based loosely off of its source, in the Church of Edda, this text is refers to the teachings of Bragi, which are presented as dialogue between Bragi himself and the cardinals that were closest to him prior to his death. This book was placed in the faith after his death, and the decision to regard the crusaders as lower-level gods, however was not written by Bragi—instead, it was composed by those same cardinals that appear in the text, attempting to pass on his teaching by what they were told directly. These mainly pertain to the idea of acceptance and performing good deeds without expecting anything in return; not necessarily what was frowned down upon, as that came into being long after Bragi’s death, and as society rebuilt itself after the fall of the Loptyr Empire. Beliefs and practices will be expanded on later.

Skáldskaparmál      Vaguely based off of the narrative part of this section of the Prose Edda, this follows Bragarödur in that it is composed of short stories about the various Earthen gods and goddesses alike. The book also follows it in structure, having the narrative parts written as though as a story is being told directly, and all of the dialogue spoken by Bragi presented as poetry. This entails stories both without or without deeper meaning about the higher-tiered Earthen gods—or, at the very least, what ones managed to survive up until the point they were written down--, and serves as a means to flesh out the faith’s deities.

Háttatal      Not based on its real-world counterpart at all, due to a lack of it being able to be translated, this book serves as the main text on ceremonies, worship, vows, and guidelines for those of the clergy. Thus, it is often the one that most religious officials within the church carry on them, especially if they are travelling to locations away from their church. It is written in an older dialect of the language spoken in Jugdral, and can only be found in that form. (**Note: if a translation or summary for this section is available, please let me know and it will be changed to fit)

Hierarchy

     Please note that while someone or something may be considered a god, that does not mean that they are an actual deity. For example, while Naga, Loptyr and the Twelve Crusaders fit into the classes of lower-level deities, they are really just dragons and humans who are worshipped like gods.

Beliefs and Practices

     The belief that supporting and aiding others, regardless of their faith, is something that is pushed within the church—more specifically, towards the members of its clergy—, and so the idea of performing good deeds without expecting anything in return is also encouraged. The main concepts of the faith revolve around simply being a good person, readily being able to express love to one another, and paying respects to those that watch over them. They believe that their gods are still present in the world, just no longer with a physical body, and that they must continue to carry on what they believe in. While there have been very few accounts of it, some claim to have had specific deities properly communicate with them before, and so the Church of Edda believes that those of good will can be given the opportunity to speak with those that they worship.

     For members of the clergy—specifically, those higher up in its hierarchy— taking vows is mandatory, and usually occurs during their ordination. There are three main ones that are pledged, being the vow of chastity, the vow of poverty, and the vow of obedience. The first asks that the person avoids sexual practices, however in extremely rare and specific circumstances, this vow may be revoked. The second demands that the person does not own any possessions, but instead only use the things that belong to the church’s community—in exchange for this, they are offered to live at parsonages, are provided food, and are allowed to keep a certain amount of money on their form. The third, quite literally, just means “to listen intently, to open one’s ears, to heed in practice”.

     The act of praying is common in the Church of Edda, and serves as a means to communicate with the gods that they worship—to seek their guidance, or to simply ask for something else. While it is not required by those who follow the faith, for members of the clergy, there are three main times of the day when they will offer up prayer—in the morning, the middle of the day, and before they sleep. It is usually done in solitude, due to the belief that prayer is a private matter, and should not be overheard by anyone else other than the deity they are praying to. However if they simply cannot find a place to themselves, or are asked to pray with someone else, they will opt for a silent one instead. The gods communicated with are chosen by the individual—there is no set group that should or should not be prayed to.

[authorincrisis]

How do I finish a simple AU when I get too caught up in wanting to perfect the plot,the character chemistry,wanting to keep the readers interested,in short just make it way too complicated and end up losing the fun of writing?

Hey, anon! Thank you so much for your excellent question! Now, I'm sure that you and many other writers may be wondering the same thing in regards to completing your story and really pounding things out before you get into specifics in the second draft and actually getting things done which, at times, can seem tedious and impossible. Maybe you have a million dollar idea, the idea that you’ve been working so long and hard on but it just isn’t working out because you can’t move forward. There’s always something more that you feel you have to add, one detail, one scene, one character, etc. So here’s the thing (and the main point of this response, I think): there is no one solution or any best solution.

Obviously, there is a lot going on in your mind, not to mention all the hullabaloo in your planning, but in order to get things done, you need to figure out the root of the problem. So, the first thing that I want you to do is really dig in. Why are you feeling the way that you are now? Is it because your plan is truly incomplete, maybe unorganized, that perhaps there is a reason preventing you from enjoying writing, or because you are starting to doubt your own literary skill? These are some of the main reasons as to why you may be stuck in the cycle and often, they might be interconnected as well. I will write a bit for each scenario below that you can skim through with the addition of some strategies that you can use to power through this period and hopefully, this can help you to get over this obstacle in your writing endeavour. : )

NOTE: The planning advice is worth reading over but if it is starting to feel like you are doubting yourself unnecessarily, the thought of your plan being ‘not enough’ may not be the case. If it is just the writing that you are worried about, please don’t dig yourself into another hole by restarting or tearing apart your current plan. Instead, perhaps only consider following points three and four.

1. Your plan isn’t actually complete: Often, writers can see themselves at the very endpoint of their story and know their goal, but not how they will actually get there. And although this may not be the case for you, it is worth looking over. Do you have a plan written out of your story that is comfortable for you? Is it solid enough that you have a base but also outlets for potential bursts of creativity? You are the only one who can decide if your plan is complete or not because it is designed for you and you only. It’s essentially the skeleton that holds together your story because it is the story, just a shorter, blueprint of it anyway. That’s a reason why it makes it so important. So, if you need any guidelines, I’ll link some resources here and here. These should be taken almost as checklists and are just to make sure that you have it all.

2. You need to organize your plan to better suit your needs: So, you’ve gone over your plan and decided that you indeed have everything that you need, but for some reason, it just isn’t working out. All the information is there, perhaps additional tidbits as well, but it’s just difficult for you to read and/or follow. For this, I want you to think if the format of your plan is working for you. If yes, you can skip this point but if no, maybe think of reorganizing it. There are so many types of plans, and I am 100% sure that there one perfect for you. This is why you should try out something new! Experiment with yourself and your flexibility and see what will allow you to move forward with your writing for not only this project, but for others to follow. Here’s a helpful link that can help you with just that! 

3. There’s something that’s preventing you from enjoying writing: There may be multiple outcomes for this point here because honestly, it sucks. You have everything figured out, but you just can’t write because you aren’t enjoying it enough to do so. So, for this, again. Find the root of the problem. Is it the particular scene that you don’t love writing or is it the research and energy that it takes up bringing you down? Either way, there is good news. There are so many strategies that can help you with this and other measures that you can take from preventing it from happening so frequently. I’ll describe a few below and remember, experimenting is always encouraged, especially in a first draft:

Put your planning on a lockdown. Maybe you can’t help but constantly feel the need to add more. Maybe it’s because you think it’s not enough. Well, if you have everything you need for a proper plan, more times than not, what you have is great. So, try to stop planning until you get something done. Even if you think you can add something more, don’t. Write it down on a piece of paper and then wait for your second draft, the place where it is realistic for that to happen. By doing this, not only will it give you motivation, but also potential time for you to actually write. It will shift your focus elsewhere and hopefully, you’ll be able to complete something. 

Sometimes writing isn’t fun and you have to be okay with that. Push yourself and write as much as you can! 500 crappy words are so much better than none at all. Remember that you are writing your first draft and this is where you’re supposed to mess up. Whatever you do, don’t look back and constantly read the whole thing, simply just power through.

Make a habit out of writing. Eventually, the quality will get better but instead of thinking of things to motivate you, just write. I cannot stress this enough. No matter what you do, what you learn, or what is around you, the most important part of writing is writing. And that just can’t happen if you don’t write. So, I will say it again. PLEASE JUST WRITE.

It’s the first draft, you’re bound to suck. Again, be okay with that because it is the whole purpose. If you are feeling insecure, perhaps after reading the works of other authors, be sure to remember that they had help editing, experience writing, and overall more time and people working on their project. They sucked one time too, but the difference is that they fixed it because they could actually get to the editing part of it.

Write the parts that you are most excited about and fill in the blanks later on. This is an interesting thing that Stephen King does as well. He writes the key parts and saves filling in the details and adjusting for later. (shit, I just repeated that sentence, it’s fine) Anyways, this helps you to have fun with your writing and also allows you to think about what could make the other details more interesting. It gives you practice and also purpose so with that in mind, why not try it out? See if it’s right for you.

Make your writing fun. Remind yourself of why you chose to write and why you were so excited about starting this project of yours. Obviously, it means something to you, and if it isn’t fun, maybe you aren’t focusing on the proper thing. Here is a resource that I found on the internet that could definitely help with getting back on track. This author, I believe, is really quite great and the article is extremely worth checking out.

Take a break (only if you haven’t been taking constant breaks so far though). Perhaps you’re pushing yourself too hard. For this, relax. Read a book and learn from it. How the author plays with their style, how they write. Watch a movie and see how it leads up to a twist. Learn by watching, and that will translate to your writing. Keep yourself healthy too! Drink lots of water, eat healthy, exercise, and sleep. If your writing is taking a toll on any of these things, please make it up to yourself by taking care of your mind and body. This is the most important thing, after all, because if you don’t have proper health, you won’t have any writing at all! At the end of the day, remember that you should be writing for yourself. This is absolutely crucial and a must-have for the success of your works. 

4. You are afraid or don’t believe enough in yourself: The thing is, you, really, are the only one who has the power to dig yourself out of that hole. No matter how much help you get or how many of the strategies above you use, it won’t matter unless you actually start writing for yourself. You have to be willing to fail or mess up and take those risks in order to be a writer. So, in short (and again) just write. And when you do, write to please yourself. I know that it seems like the most terrifying thing at first but it will get better and you will see that clearly as your story unfolds. It’s always difficult, but that’s a part of the process, and you just have to trust it and yourself. You’ll thank yourself later for it too!

So, I really do hope that this advice could help! If you have any further questions about this, or anything else, please don’t be afraid to shoot me another question. I nearly have all the time in the world and would be happy to assist. Have a fantastic day and good luck! Cheers!

[moonmothmama]

ok. so. The Princess Bride. i read it yesterday.

and right up front, before even a review, i’m gonna go ahead and list everything objectionable in the book that i can recall. please don’t take the length of the bullet pointed items to follow as an indication that the book was wildly problematic and offended me at every turn; it wasn’t and it didn’t. but there were some things that made me go: 😑 or 😒, and here it all is, presented with context, before anything else, because to be honest, i didn’t expect any of it. the film is relatively spotless, which is pretty rare for that era, and if any of you are thinking of reading it, you could do with being more prepared for this than i was.

first off, racism. two passing remarks. one isn’t even in the story proper; it’s in the first whole long intro bit from the author/narrator. that takes some explanation, i suppose: like in the film, the story is presented as a book having been written by “S. Morganstern,” except instead of a grandfather reading to his sick grandson, the narrator is interjecting with notes on the original text that he has abridged. the beginning is a whole long shpiel that, in my opinion, could have been significantly pared down with absolutely zero loss to the story (which! hey! the film did perfectly! go figure!). anyway, the first racist remark is an absolutely tasteless line in which the narrator pisses and moans about his fat son, making a crack about “painting him yellow” and making him a sumo wrestler. y i k e. the other passing remark is from Miracle Max (really, truly, the film version of this scene is miles better than the book version, but contains an important plot detail, so you should prob still read it, but i’ll give you the lowdown if you wanna skip). he refers to Iñigo as a sp*ck (rather bafflingly, i might add, bc Iñigo is a Spanish man... from Spain... not a Hispanic or Latino man from Latin America. so. i mean i’m certainly not an expert on slurs but... i have never in my life heard that term in reference to a person from Spain, and am virtually certain it was invented to refer to ppl from the americas) and in the same breath uses an objectionable term for a Polish person. sooo... again: y i k e. what gets me is that... these could’ve just been edited out? why weren’t they? i mean i know why but

fat shaming! see above. though to be honest, any true negativity about fatness is restricted to the author/narrator’s interjections; there are a few minor fat characters in the story and those depictions, without being too long-winded or spoilery, didn’t offend me (fyi: i’m fat). if you want the details, please feel free to message me about it.

if we can go back to the whole long beginning shpiel from the author/narrator, it’s just... eh. he comes off as kind of a jackass, tbh. not even halfway through it i found myself more than a little impatient for the story to begin, and that could be at least partly because the film spoiled me with a lovely, not annoying, not problematic scene of Granddad Columbo reading to Baby Fred Savage where no one made any racist remarks or ragged on fat kids. the basic gist, if you want to skip it, is that the author, as a kid, had this book read to HIM by his father, who was a Florinese immigrant, and nearly illiterate in English, but still labored over reading the English translation to his American-born son, who adored the book and requested it read to him dozens and dozens of times over the years, refusing to read it himself (though he read plenty of other books). as an adult, he buys his son the book, and is crushed when the son doesn’t like it. he then reads it for the first time, and realizes his father skipped over huge, boring blocks of text. he read his son only The Good Parts. so he decides to edit that shit out himself and release the abridged version he loves so much. add into that some complaining about his wife and some extra blah blah, and that’s pretty much it.

you remember the scene in the movie where The Man In Black/Westley almost slaps Buttercup for what he believes is lying? in the book he actually slaps her. not that his actions seem supported or endorsed by the text, but still, there you are. Buttercup does push him off a cliff soon after, though, so. i wouldn’t call that ‘even’ exactly but, shrug

Vizzini, in the book, has a fucky leg and his back isn’t quite straight, and he’s referred to repeatedly as a “humpback” or “hunchback” which needless to say is Not Kosher

that, as i recall, is it. i hope i’m not forgetting anything. now onto content/trigger warnings:

alcoholism. this shouldn’t be a surprise if you’ve seen the movie: Iñigo has some, shall we say, issues

Fezzik’s parents were... terrible. CPS would be all over them. spoiler: basically they emotionally blackmailed their son into fighting professionally, which they knew he hated, by telling him they’d abandon him if he didn’t

Buttercup has some kinda messed up (read: unsettling but in no way graphic) nightmares after leaving Westley when they’re found by Prince Humperdinck at the Fire Swamp, mostly involving bearing children to the Prince who she once again is set to marry

the slurs and whatnot i mentioned above

violence, obviously. nothing worse than the film as i recall.

that’s it i think. 

okay. all that said. did i enjoy the book? yes i did. a lot.

now, you might be thinking: jesus, Kathleen, after all the shit you just listed? and to this i reply: listen. there is no Unproblematic Media, so you either enjoy some things that are flawed, or you enjoy nothing at all. there is plenty of objectionable shit in Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit! fucking plenty! and i love those books! and so do plenty of other people! in my own humble opinion, the good story is worth the shitty bits, because the shitty bits aren’t like, fundamental to the plotline. the story isn’t built on offensive humor or nasty, bigoted attitudes. and they’re also not the most egregious examples of Objectionable Content i’ve come across- not by a longshot. there are levels to offense. there are tiers of bullshit. this is on a far lower tier than a whole host of other things i could mention. but if any of this stuff i’ve listed crosses a line for you, i totally understand and respect that. that’s why i’ve bothered to list it at all. imo, how you respond to objectionable content is important: you don’t ignore it or excuse it, you acknowledge and criticize it. and if you still enjoy whatever the thing is, you allow yourself to enjoy it, without getting hissy or defensive with people for whom the objectionable content ruined the book/movie/whatever. 

there you go, there’s my disclaimer for having enjoyed the book. your mileage may vary.

okay. so. review time.

Buttercup is a far more interesting character in the book than the movie, for which the movie can’t be faulted all that much, because you can’t easily translate a character’s inner monologue/unspoken thoughts to the screen, especially not with the time limit that comes with the medium of film. but watching her struggle with her feelings and life choices (and... lack thereof, since her choice is between marrying the prince and being put to death, which isn’t much of a choice, even if she tries to reason it out later by telling herself she COULD have said no... and initially did) creates far more of a bond between her and the reader in the book than, personally, i felt watching the movie. also she has a great line after Westley calls her beautiful at their reunion- she says something like, ‘everyone’s always calling me beautiful, i have a mind too, why don’t you talk about that’

Both Westley and Buttercup are immature, naive, and foolish in the beginning, and if Westley strikes you as Extra Dickish, a) rewatch the film! he did act like a bit of a dick, there, didn’t he? b) remember that in the story he’s a young man between the ages of eighteen and twenty five, which in my considerable experience is the age at which young men are generally at their peak of Asshole. sorry dudes

and not that Buttercup herself is a complete peach! she deals very poorly with her emotions in general and acts kinda shitty herself once or twice. i won’t say too much lest i spoil everything that’s different between the film and the book.

Prince Humperdinck is also a more three dimensional character; still a rat bastard tho.

onto Fezzik and Iñigo.

as i have said in other blog posts, these boys are... pretty much the whole reason i sought out the book. and... jesus. 

you get all the way into the tragic backstories that were only hinted at in the film. okay, Iñigo’s backstory was more than hinted- but of course you go so much deeper in the book- and Fezzik’s was less than hinted, reduced mostly to a peek at the insecurity that Vizzini exploits and preys upon to keep him in line. not that you’d have to expend a great effort to him to keep him in line; his personality is docile and non-confrontational. truly not the slightest bit aggressive by nature. he’s also kinda clingy and needy, which is a thousand percent understandable given his childhood, and tbqh doesn’t need to be browbeaten for Vizzini to keep him on his short, cruel leash. which makes it all the more painful! hurrah! 😭

also you actually get to meet Iñigo’s father, Domingo Montoya, in a flashback, aaaand... i kinda love him. probably predictable if you know me.

anyway. tragic backstories. which further illuminate the emotional and psychological issues that make them so dependent on Vizzini, and turn them to lives of crime in his employ. poor boys! oy gevalt. sympathy abounds; i honestly don’t know how you could go through the book and not fall at least a little bit in love with this duo, whose friendship is precious and adorable and a balm to the soul that is aching from their painful life stories and unhealthy coping mechanisms. they’re each, very plainly, the only friend the other has in the world, and are constantly helping and bolstering one another. it’s heartbreakingly sweet. i think those boys will be alright as long as they stick together.

and now, the repeated theme of the book, that is presented with far less intensity in the film: life isn’t fair. which, one supposes, is true. but while the narrator’s framing of that assertion may give you the same misgivings they gave me- bitching about his fat son and his less than ideal relationship with his wife- you can also step back and appreciate it as a wee pearl of wisdom. life is often unfair, but that doesn’t mean it’s altogether bad or that you can’t enjoy it. idk, that’s my attitude, man. 

i could talk about the ending here, but i won’t. at least not too much. not to spoiler-ish-ly. if you don’t want to know anything about the book’s ending at all, feel free to not read the last bit here, except for the very last lines which are bolded.

ready? yes? no?

...

the ending to the book is different than the movie. there is a more philosophical, open ended conclusion than you could really get away with in a movie. at least this movie.

just throwing it out there: i believe in happy endings. ones in real life. but i kind of disagree with the author a little bit, in that i don’t think happy endings necessarily have to be perfect and unblemished to qualify as happy endings. that may be the way “happily ever after” is generally presented, but to me, “happily ever after” means, maybe some shit happened, but none of it was completely devastating, and in the final analysis, life was satisfying. that’s the kind of real life happy ending i’m aiming (and hoping) for. this might sound vague but i hope it’ll make sense if you read the book.

if you wanna do that, btw, i read it for free online at allnovel dot net.

[jflashandclash]

Traitors of Olympus: Fall of the Sun

Eight: Ajax

How to Quiet a child of Poseidon in Two Seconds Flat

           Pax was impressed: no one punched anyone during his recap of their early adventures, from kidnapping Rachel Elizabeth Dare, to stealing the coals of Kronos’ sword and stealing the Golden Net from Bunker Nine, to the trials of Psyche, to tricking Leo into reforging Backbiter, and to Santiago’s Mayan temple, where their father killed Joey, and Euna killed their father.

           Axel, Calex, or Kally chimed in to explain parts where Pax wasn’t there or where he exaggerated how important the weasels, Hunnie and Baller, were to the mission—always vitally important, even when unconscious. Pax was sad Axel didn’t give the full rendition of how he fought off Aphrodite’s giant doves with a frying pan[1] and how Euna got temporary god pills out of it, but Pax figured they could save the long version for Axel and Reyna’s children to assure the kids that their father was versatile with all weapons and cookery.  

           They got through the misunderstandings of what led up to their fight against the heroes of Olympus and why Jack had murdered his half-brother, Will. Well, that last part was less a misunderstanding and more a psychotic break, but Pax hoped they got the picture.

           When Pax mentioned the Princess Andromeda, that’s when things went down a tiny, Everest-sized hill.

           “The Princess Andromeda?” Travis interrupted before Pax could explain in full. “I thought that sunk after Beckendorf…”

           Yep, that was the weird part, Pax thought. That and not that the passage of stairs in the middle of their cabins that led down to an ocean. Or it used to. Pax had to wonder if magical passages like that got bored and moved places. He would if he were a magical passage.[2]

           Alabaster set his glass of strawberry flavored water down.

           Pax was pleased that Merry had commanded the satyrs bring everyone drinks, especially since—with his hand condition—the satyrs had taped three straws together so Pax could sip from his without leaning forward or using his hands.

           While blowing bubbles into his drink, which took awhile and required three straws-worth of backwash, Pax glanced over to Alabaster’s side of the table.

           The child of Hecate’s knuckles were white as he clutched one of the ingredient satchels that dangled from his neck. His other hand casually clinked the ice in his glass. “Beckendorf?” he repeated. “Was that the name of your suicide bomber?”

           Clarisse choked in rage.

           Most of the other counselors went still.

           “Charles Beckendorf was a hero,” Percy said, scowling.

           “As were the kamikaze pilots in Japan and the jihadists for ISIS,” Alabaster said, his eyes boring into Percy with a scary intensity. If Pax had some, he was pretty sure he could roast marshmallows between the two of them.

           Percy’s face went red. He shot to his feet, had a foot on the table, and Riptide in hand before Jason and Hazel grabbed him.

           A baby cried.[3]

           All eyes turned towards the mirror at Percy’s side.

           Throughout the explanation, Hiro had finished several puzzles and eaten a full pizza. When Percy stood, Hiro snatched Percy’s little sister from the crib-cage, where he’d put her down for a nap.

           With his other hand, Hiro snapped out a switchblade the size of her arm.

           He pinched her hand and dabbed one of her fingers.

           For the first time since Hiro had gotten his hands on the baby, she squealed and squirmed.

           The color drained from Percy’s face as he scrambled back into his throne of Saturnalia. Baby Cry Shock Collars—highly effective against children of Poseidon.

           “I’m sorry—I—I didn’t mean—” Percy stammered.

           Hiro pointed the knife at Axel. Then he carefully set the whining baby back into her crib and folded the knife up beside her—the proper way to store weapons around tiny children. Pax swallowed as Hiro made a motion, like he was holding a zucchini in one hand and his other hand were a butcher knife chopping it. To finish the comment, he held one hand out, grabbed his index finger, and shook it.

           Although Pax doubted anyone needed translation, Axel puffed up and popped his cheeks. “He says he’ll start cutting fingers off if you stand up again.”

           “I won’t,” Percy said through gritted teeth. “Just don’t hurt my little sister.”

           After reading both of their lips, Hiro nodded cheerfully. He turned back to the baby, made a goofy face at her, and wrapped her up in his arms, careful to dodge around the darts lining his suspenders. Hiro gave her finger an apologetic kiss and rocked her to some unknown tune.

           “Man, maybe we really shouldn’t have left Hiro with Dad for those years,” Pax muttered. He waved a hand at Hiro and made sure his lips were fully visible as he said, “Hiro, do you want someone to take you to the park to play ball? Or get you ice cream or a puppy? That you won’t kill—okay, maybe not a puppy—I guess I’m trying to say that Axel and I will give you attention without you committing several felonies and doing the whole, ‘creepy villain…’”

           Pax trailed off when he saw the look in Hiro’s eyes.

           Pax liked to remember Hiro as the tiny, happy child that would crawl onto Pax’s shoulders to pretend Pax was a horse and followed Pax around Frasco’s circus to learn everything Pax knew.

           But now, Hiro’s eyes weren’t alight with admiration. They were narrowed with malice. The look told Pax that no number of hugs, or hand knit sweaters, or crazy moon bounce parties would let Hiro forgive each night that Axel and Pax hadn’t come to save he and Lapis from their father.

           “--ait until I can get out of this chair—”

           Pax felt numb as he tuned back into Percy’s threat.

           Alabaster cut him off with a shrug. “We never bombed any of your living quarters, neither cabin nor barracks. We didn’t want to support that kind of blind murder.”                

           Clarisse snorted. “You probably couldn’t think of a lot of different tactics.”

           Something, Pax thought, one really ought to be proud of, Oh damn, I’m so uncreative in my terrorism.

           “No, we did,” Axel said, as calm as Alabaster. “Luke didn’t want to fight that kind of war.”

           “I find that queer, coming from the Cloven Terror and Leonis Caput,” Reyna said. She appeared to regret throwing her knife at Pax, as she now resorted to twirling a ring on her finger. As a show of good faith towards a future sister-in-law, Pax almost considered tossing it back to her, but—judging by the tense environment—that might not be the best way to express his positive emotions.

           Axel didn’t buckle under her scrutiny. “You pick your battles. We would carefully chose and eliminate a few selective leaders to immobilize an army and minimize overall killing instead of attacking a majority, especially not an area with noncombat units.”

           Alabaster sighed and Pax found himself wishing he had his headphones so he didn’t need to hear this argument again. “Grassroots versus trickle down approach. Axel strongly believed in trickle down.” Alabaster rolled his eyes.

           “Hey!” Kally’s shout made Pax jump in surprise. “This isn’t helping the camp full of kids that are going to be obliterated at sundown. Plenty of which know nothing of the Titan war.”

           The table quieted. Everyone but Axel and Alabaster looked off to the side and grumbled.

           “Sorry,” Kally said as an afterthought, exhaling.

           As best Pax could, he rested his hand atop hers under the table.

           Merry gave Kally an encouraging nod from across.

           Although Pax didn’t want to talk after seeing Hiro’s expression, he managed, “If I were an evil goddess with an amazing fashion sense and great monologue skills, this is exactly the kind of internal fighting I would want to cause to waste time and distract everyone.”

           “The daughter of Apollo and counselor of Eris are right,” Reyna said. “We can discuss ethics and wartime philosophy later.” Her gaze lingered on Axel.

           Axel raised an exhausted eyebrow at her.

           Pax wondered if Axel could find a way to make a discussion on ethics and wartime philosophy into some weird flirting. Twenty Reese’s said he could, and could make it end with some weirder make out/wrestling session.

           Moving on from his brother’s creative Top Ten Questions to Ask a Girl on the First Date, and the debate of who murdered whom more ethically, Merry directed them back onto the subject at hand.  

           Pax finished off his story and Percy filled in the gaps from his party.

           Hazel chimed in on Will’s behalf—since he still couldn’t speak for himself—narrating Will and Joey’s adventures through the Underworld before Joey became real competition for Medusa’s Best Statue of the Year award and about how the dead told Will that something had upset Nyx.

           Merry’s jaw jutted to one side as she watched Hiro tuck the now-sleeping baby back into her crib-cage. “Gothic architecture… Everyone else heard some lovely chimes this morning, right? Just after sunrise?”

           Percy groaned and glared sideways at the mirror. “Yea, they were right in my ear.”

           Annabeth’s eyes went wide. “Chiming as in bells? Like church bells?” She turned to Percy, looking more awake than she had the whole meeting. “Did Eris say anything else? Anything when she was threatening your sister?”

           Pax was glad Athena had decided to click on some lights above Merry and Annabeth’s heads, because his mind was still skipping in the dark as were the minds of the other fifteen or so cabins present.

           “I didn’t exactly take notes,” Percy said.

           “Anything could be important, Water Muffin,” Merry said.

           Percy’s brow furrowed, though Pax wasn’t sure if it was from Merry’s nickname or from thought. “No warriors can be sent after her or he’ll drop her three hundred feet onto concrete…”

           Annabeth and Merry made eye contact. Merry grinned. “Annabeth, what Gothic churches are three hundred feet tall or above in the USA?”

           “Not many.” Annabeth pushed some of the curls out of her face. “The Washington Cathedral, the Riverside Church…”

           Percy’s face brightened, in direct contrast to his words. “She also said something about falling to concrete to put more weight onto Atlas’s shoulders. Last I checked, Atlas is stuck on Mount Tams. Any of those churches in California?”

           Annabeth frowned. “No—”

           Merry snapped her fingers. “Our little Hiro and bae are right next door.”

           Annabeth blinked for a second before saying, “Of course! Saint Patrick’s Cathedral by the Rockefeller Center.”

           “The weight of the world is on the Rockefeller Center?” Travis whispered loudly to Connor.

           “Talk about performance pressure,” he responded in kind.

           Merry chuckled. “Only when they’re putting up their Christmas tree. No. There’s a pretty statue of Atlas between it and the cathedral.”

           A slow, methodical clap chilled their celebration at the discovery and reminded everyone that they had forgotten to cover their mouths when facing the mirror. Hiro gave them a half-grin, one a little too close to Pax’s devilish smiles.

           “So we know where she is,” Clarisse said. “But what good does that do us? No one can go there.”

           “I can go.”

           Everyone glanced over to where Merry had leaned forward, stretching her hands out in front of her in a way that—Pax suspected—she did to distract Calex with how much it pinched her chest between her arms.

           Merry relaxed, so she could put an elbow on the table and lean her head against that hand. “Eris specified big bad warriors, right? I’m not a big bad warrior. I’m a demigod contradiction: a pacifist. I will only lift a finger for dancing, partying, and sacrificing good grades to Annabeth’s mom—not to violence.”

           Her gaze switched from the counselors over to the mirror. “And, I’ll bet Hiro and Lapis saw that when they were creeping on our group. What do you think Hiro? I won’t bring any weapons. Can Aunti Merry drop by for a hug without you having a baby shower?”

           Pax wanted to hug Merry for the ill-timed pun, but he sensed a flaw in her plan, one that Axel stated perfectly for the group. “That will probably just give Hiro two hostages.”

           Calex swallowed. “No offense, Merry... but Axel is right.”

           She winked. “Trust me. I got this. How’s about it, Hiro?”

           Hiro considered, bobbing his head from side-to-side and making his long, black hair flutter. Then, Hiro rapidly signed something that Pax didn’t catch.

           “Hiro!” Axel snarled disapprovingly in a way that made Pax want to say, Oh yea, NOW is when you want to chastise him for being rude.

           Hiro signed slower.

           Pax frowned, wishing his brother was a bit more like a cute panda. “So you won’t defend yourself if attacked?” he translated in place of Axel.

           Merry’s honey skin paled a shade, but her relaxed smile stayed strong. “Won’t lift a finger,” she repeated.

           Hiro clapped giddily and jumped in place. Pax imagined—if Hiro were an animated character—that his hair would take more time to draw then the background.

           “Augh, what a creep,” Miranda grumbled.

           There was a grumble of agreement, especially from the victory twins. Though Pax still didn’t know what people were expecting from someone who had threatened to play Fruit Ninja with a baby’s fingers.

           Calex gripped the edge of the table, his knuckles paling. He whispered something into Merry’s ear. She gently touched one of his hands to calm him.

           The pit in Pax’s stomach had grown from a baby stream to the size of the Grand Canyon. When Hiro began to sign again, Pax wondered if he could pretend he’d experienced sudden amnesia and could now only sign the words Doritos are awesome.  “No weapons. No backup. Only mortal transportation. We can have lunch. Tell Pax and Axel that they are dumb f—hey!” Pax huffed. “My face is adorable!”

           Merry folded her hands in front of her, straightened her shoulders, and closed her eyes. “Axel. Pax. You are dumb faces.”

           Hiro’s shoulders shuddered with a giggle.

           Axel sighed. “Hiro, when this is all over and I get my hands on you, I’m dragging you all the way back to Chiich and making you tell her everything you’ve done.”

           Pax’s ear hurt at the thought and he wasn’t even the one who would be in trouble.

           Hiro huffed, crossed his arms, and turned his back to the mirror.

           With Hiro’s back turned, Merry’s smile weakened. Even from where Pax was sitting, he could tell she needed a huge hoard of weasels to hug her. That always made him feel better.

           Percy glanced at the mirror back to the daughter of Dionysus. “Do… do you really think you can help my little sister?” he asked. “Especially with the whole no-kicking-ass thing?”

           “Who needs to go fisty-cuffs when you���ve got a noggin?” She tapped her forehead.

           Clarisse scoffed, “Hippie.”

           Annabeth gave Merry an exhausted smile of appreciation. “I assume you have a plan?”

           Merry nodded.

           Axel scowled. “Don’t let your guard down just because he’s a child. He can throw darts as quick as Ajax and I don’t know what Santiago has been teaching him… I refuse to let you be the next Joey.”

           The cheer in Merry’s face erased at the mention of their ghostly, petrified friend.

           Pax could feel Kally trembling violently under his hand. “Merry… are you going to be okay?” she asked. Although everyone else might not notice, Kally had put her other hand on the table in a thumbs down position.

           “I’ll be careful, sweeties,” Merry said, looking across the counselor table to make eye contact with Kally, Pax, Axel, and ending on Calex. Subtly, she put a thumbs up on the table in response.

           From the looks of it, Calex was two seconds away from exploding into a panicked array of shiny, Eros arrows, hopefully putting on the best fireworks show Pax had ever seen and ending with the least PG twist for any demigod.

           Except that ex-Roman son of Jupiter was here.

           Pax vetoed the non-PG Eros ending for this counselor meeting.

           “I don’t like this, but we don’t have any choice except to trust that Merry knows what she’s doing.” Thalia drummed her fingers along the table. Pax found it weird to look at Thalia’s silvery camo and dark hair in full daylight. When Matthias was feeling better, they would have to make a little moonlight screen to put behind the Lieutenant of Artemis during all meetings, complete with deer-shaped nightlights and cartoon constellations. “We don’t have a ton of time, and I think we need to talk about how a demigod with god-power eye drops and a singing head that can blow a hole in the camp are on their way to Tartarus.”

           Axel’s eyes narrowed. “We do. The longer we wait, the more distance Euna puts between here and Tartarus, and the harder it will be for me to catch up with her.”

           Pax felt like Phobetor had snuck up on him and used that piccolo-hatchet to hack out his heart. “You’re going back there? To the happy land of fratricide and cheesy, cop out villains?” he said, not realizing until the very end that his squeak had come out in Mayan. “What are you going to do if Mrs. I-want-inside-your-pants and Mr. And-I’ll-cut-off-what’s-in-your-pants show back up?!”

           Those dark, Mist-covered eyes sank down to his hands. “I think they got what they wanted. Besides…” Axel cleared his throat and returned his gaze to the table. “I’m not sure if Euna’s stairwell has connected with the labyrinth yet or what is down there, but if I enter the labyrinth via Zeus’s fist, I should be able to navigate it easily and avoid godly confrontations.”      

           Pax prayed no one would connect that knowledge with the Battle of the Labyrinth.

           A few displeased grumbles came from Frank, Hazel, and Reyna.

           “Assuming we let you go,” Reyna said, twirling her ring while scrutinizing him, “Someone needs to go with to assure that you’re not convincing Euna to join the gods attacking camp—”

           Pax thought nothing could distract Calex from fretting over Merry, but those words made him gawk. “Euna wouldn’t do that. She blames Eris for her sister’s death.”

           “And,” Reyna said, her eyes flashing over to Calex to silence him before returning to Axel. “If you were stricken with madness again, you would need someone that can hunt you down in the event that you rampage and attack allies.”

           Although Axel maintained eye contact and posture, Pax knew Reyna could hurt Axel less by putting her metal greyhounds into a ballista and firing them at Axel than by saying that. Axel didn’t try to defend himself; his expression broke.

           The worst part: Pax couldn’t defend Axel either. She was right.

           At least one good thing could come out of this: maybe Axel and Reyna could take a romantic vacation to Tartarus to talk about their feelings, punch daimons, and—

           “I can,” Thalia said. “Euna was close to joining the ranks of Artemis. If Artemis isn’t around to do so, it is my responsibility to help a maiden in my goddess’ absence. And,” Thalia raised her fingers, snapping them so a burst of static electricity arched. “I can take Axel.”

           Axel, though still looking appropriately sulky, raised an eyebrow again in amusement.

           Calex cleared his throat. His wary gaze shifted from Merry, back to Axel in uncertainty. “I can come too. I know Euna, a medic is always useful, and three is a sacred quest number.”

           “That would outnumber Thalia two to one if you decide to turn on her,” Frank said.

           “Frank!” Piper chastised, touching her nephew’s shoulder to show her disagreement.

           “Uh, Calex is pretty cool,” Percy said. “But… going to Tartarus…” He trailed off, looking to Annabeth for help.

           She gave an exhausted sigh. “I don’t think Calex would betray us. But, without Chiron’s healing, we need all the medical assistance and fighting power we can have here. You shouldn’t go to Tartarus.”

           Those words were like putting a parental lock on Calex’s quest options. Although none of them said it, Pax had the distinct feeling, from the glance Percy, Annabeth, and Axel exchanged, that none of them thought Calex would enjoy the walk through the River Acheron. However, Pax wanted to point out that Calex had probably been an Arsenal hooligan at a West Ham stadium after West Ham lost a match, and which likely had similar conditions.

           “I think your skills are better suited here,” Axel agreed.

           Calex looked unsettled, but was unwilling to contradict both Annabeth and Axel.

           “It’s alright,” Axel said, “We’ll get her home safely.” He scooted his chair back, stood, and rested one hand on Alabaster’s shoulder. “If we have any hope of intercepting Euna, Thalia and I need to pack up now.”

           Pax caught Axel’s eye. They both puffed up their cheeks and popped them. Pax wanted to tell Axel not to go, that there were scary bad guys in Tartarus, that Pax had no way of keeping Alabaster from pigballing Percy to make bacon for the group, and that Pax would inevitably stuff his face with tree nuts without Axel around, puff up to the size of a condo, and fly away into the sun. And they all knew how that turned out for Icarus.

           But Pax also didn’t want to go anywhere near Axel. He got the distinct feeling this was Axel’s big boy version of needing a stroll to cool off.

           Thalia stood up and unslung a silvery backpack from one side of her chair and her unstrung bow from the other. “Done packing,” said the huntress. She rolled her eyes at Axel’s half-smile. “Ugh, boys always take so long to get ready.”

           There was a brief vote, something that clearly made Miranda and Butch uncomfortable without Chiron’s approval. The overwhelming majority voted in favor of their departure, with Clovis abstaining due to a nap, and Jason the only one uncomfortable with sending his sister to Hell with a beast.

           As his brother walked away with little more than an awkward wave, like Pax’s mother, Hiro, and Lapis had abandoned him previously, Pax realized that he’d need to learn how to take care of himself and he’d have to learn fast.

Thanks for reading! Anyone surprised by the Tartarus promenade pair? Tune in next week for Axel’s chapter: Hot Women Need to Stop Sneaking Up on Me.

Also! Sorry if my edits were sloppy this round. Mel was awesome in giving me a rush delivery on betaedits, and I completely butchered them XD

  Footnotes:

[1] Mel Betanote: “I was about to say ‘PAX, THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN’ but then I remembered that it did and now I can’t tell the difference between what actually happened and Pax’s exaggerations because they sound the same!”

Jack’s response: My work here is done.

[2] China Mieville.

[3] So, if I had more sleep, I could more artfully slip this in here…. But sound can come out, it just can’t go in. This footnote is to remind Jack not to be a lazy jerk and clarify this properly in writing! *tsk tsk* to Jack’s lazy footnoting.