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qumiiiquinnquin · 4 months

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i feel like one of the worst people in the world right now. but at least my semester is over

#vent #presentation didnt go well #i couldnt start talking without having a huge coughing fit first so i had to ask one of my groupmates to please present for me #even though i was confident i would be fine #i kept coughing during class though i was really trying to be quiet since people were presenting #my professor said to the class in general that if they need to go do things like cough to please go do it outside the classroom #multiple times. i knew it was directed at and because of me though #i felt so embarrassed. its not my fault im sick. i couldve stayed home and just accepted the few points taken off for not being there today #i feel like such a disrespectful asshole even if i couldnt control the coughing and the fact im sick #i might as well have stayed outside the entire class #and also that final project i got a zero on for a different class #i ended this semester on such an unbelievably bad note and i want to blame myself for getting sick even though that's not how it works #but god i feel so terrible #ill probably be fine later and get over this. who knows

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daily-hanamura · 1 year

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#p4 #persona 4 #p4g #hanamura yosuke #yosuke hanamura #anyone that says yosuke is nothing but mean and awful to Kanji should meet me in the parking lot #we're not going to throw hands im just going to show you my 100 slide powerpoint presentation on their complex dynamic #for me one of the most appealing things about yosuke is how human and realistic he's been written #he is simultaneously capable of immense empathy and care towards his friends while at the same time struggle with his own identity #combined with a difficultly in self expression that results in him making tactless and hurtful remarks at times #thats not to say it makes those remarks ok - far from it!#but i think reducing yosuke to just those remarks makes him a rather empty caricature #which is such a shame especially considering that his entire personal narrative arc has been about confronting himself so he can be better #but anyway yes he cares about his friends he cares about their well being so much #he didnt have any obligation or a responsibility to look out for his juniors but he did so anyway without anyone asking #and it's so!!! because kanji does not look like he needs babying at all. hes taller than both yosuke and yu and he looks way older too #kanji has taken care of biker gangs by himself and is known to be intimidating #not that any of that fazes yosuke? kanji is his friend now hes one of them and therefore yosuke immediately wants to look out for him #god hanamura yosuke you so!!!#AAAAAAAAH #he's good with his queue

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deoidesign · 4 months

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#ok finally making a post about meds #I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset #so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but #it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways #so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone #like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus #my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night #sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired #it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted #but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too #but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared #so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow #anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING #that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up #I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world #and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on #and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!

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feline-evil · 1 year

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Hiding my shirt that says 'i am not normal about narratives that imply an inanimate inhabited structure is a living breathing organism' as i walk into a board room and pitch my idea that we should make more horror revolving around living architecture

#jay talkin #I JUST. I JUST. i'm thinking about old haunted house movies that have this grimy sticky feeling to the house #where the evil is not just afflicted to wood and bricksbut eminates from it as a hatred #the house itself hates you. the voice screaming get out is born on the vocal chords of the hallway #i am also thinking about The Hotel the podcast you should all already be streaming CHOP CHOP CMON NOW #which is of course a more unique and i would say more abstract sister to this concept #(said deeply positively the concepts and horror explored make my brain ping pong rapidly)#which is another reason you should be listening because it does its own thing that i think you should listen to and discover yrself :)#(and also it is far more than this this is just a tiny SLITHER of what is explored go listen NEOW)#and i am also thinking about. drum roll please. you know whats coming. yes it could be nothing else #kitty horrorshows anatomy which is TO THIS DAY one of the best and most influential games upon me i have played #a game that pushes this concept to its core grotesque emotional fleshy pulp and runs with it #anatomy is a game that breeds in anxiety and discomfort and bleeds a sincere love in the horror it portrays #that love is something i yearn to see in horror media! it is also present in the hotel AHEM AHEM #but yes anatomy is an experience like no other that you really should experience for yourself #(glances down at my shirt) um. um ok so ill leave the board meeting now thank you for listening #dear god my pain medcin kicked in and i instantly became the worlds least normal man didnt i. WELL!!! thats all of youse problem now

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aurorangen · 1 year

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It was about time for Renee to find out

Transcript & Context:

[Renee walks along the beach and sees Robbie with his friends…and Keon]

Renee: I need to speak to you. Robbie: [sighs] What do you want? Spit it out here. Renee: Alone.

Renee: Stay away from Keon. Robbie: Why should I do that? [under his breath] My god you're so fucking annoying. Renee: [debating whether to tell him what happened] He's trouble.

Robbie: I don't know what history you two have or how you even know him, but at least Keon treats me like someone. Not invisible like you do to me at school. Renee: Why can't you listen to me for once? I'm telling you the truth-

Robbie: When things go well, you come and ruin it. But do you know how humiliating it was starting high school and getting ignored by your sister? Oh you don't want to be related to the loser with no friends. Renee: [quietly then loses it] No, it's not like that, that's not fucking important right now-

Robbie: How your reputation as top student would fall if you talked to me? How people pity you for having a brother with issues? Renee: [Renee has never been this angry] Robbie, shut up and listen to me.

Robbie: Get lost. I don't wanna hear it.

I know I didn't show any of their interactions at school or focus much on Robbie having a hard time, but everything he said is true: Renee has not been the most supportive big sister. Being overshadowed by her all his life, pressure from his Dad as a kid, favouritism, low confidence, everything adds up to how he is now. And it really is a shame he doesn't believe Renee.

#ts4 #sims 4 #ts4 gameplay #ts4 legacy #postcard legacy #postcard gen 2 #renee reichmann #robbie reichmann #i didnt show their difficult relationship but its actually THIS BAD #i didnt want it to go this bad but it makes it all more interesting #over the years it got worse but i dont think i presented it too well #some things the game autonomously did (him being mean and all)#his fears confidence and family dynamics. others i made them do #i always think of ideas later on and if i could i would go back and #do everything differently #with a stronger storytelling element #but it is what it is im improving now

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trainingdummyrabbit · 11 months

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in conclusion the most poignant thing about ruina is its running theme of Imperfection. imperfection, focused not on its flaws, but on the miracle of it existing to begin with. imperfection not as a failing, but as a triumph. its cracked, broken, deeply in need of repair-- but it's real and its ours and it exists. despite everything it exists and that enough is a relief beyond words, beyond expression. to present a toppled structure not as a conclusion, but an opportunity.

its the choice-- and the joy-- of looking forward, unflinchingly, and facing it. one step at a time.

#piktalk #projmoon #didnt want to . make a bigger tagwall than i already made . ae if ur reading this uhhhhhh sorry <33 hai KSJNFD #anyway one of these days i might get th voice to really truly put down everything and what it means in regards to . [motions w hands]#but this ones just on my mind right now. something abt the presentation of ruina just fucking Kills and this is the big reason why #ilike. had to take a good couple hours after th finale to just simmer with it. because well..#again. its imperfection. every other story has such stark; lined up beats and paths and Messages Youre Supposed To Take #which ive spoken on before-- and it isnt a bad thing necessarily! but it does really speak something; quietly;#for those whose development Isnt That Neat. that Isnt That Kind. to themself or to others. im no expert; but it really does mean something #that ruina is written in such a way where there is no 'this is wrong and heres how they fix it to be forgiven'#or 'this is right and what everyone should do to be a Good Person'#angela simply Is. roland simply Is. they all simply Are. they make choices; have hopes; dreams; things they care about--#and theres no overarching echo of What Should Be. simply what people do; and what people hope for.#um. anyway. tag wall again; in conclusion: Why Dont You Go Listen To Poems Of A Machine And Maybe Then Youll Calm Down

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cantsaythetword · 4 months

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Manifesting tkls manifesting tkls manifesting tkls manifesting tkls

#cool dude is hanging out plus my best friends tonight #we playing mario kart #PLEASE LET THE STARS ALIGN IT WOULD MAKE ME V HAPPY #had a mild panic attack cause i had to do a presentation in front of cool dude and friends #and it didnt go well #(i think)#and now im worried they think idk what im talking about or that im a bad teacher #so tkls would fix that and tell me they arent mad at me #but i doubt it will happen #:(#he speaks

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sonicunleash · 8 months

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society if the dungeon meshi anime actually had texture and kept ryoko kui's personality in the artstyle instead of doing generic thin-lined flat colors flat shading streamlined anime face style. i know ppl have mixed opinions on some of these examples but i reallyyyy wished they went stronger on the mangas artstyle like say haikyuu season 4 and demonslayer did.

like i think heavier shading and use of lineweight and black shading would already do a lot for the texture... more frequent use of that nose shading ryuko kui uses a lot, like here? ALSO BRO THEY GOT RID OF LAIOS' UNDERCUT like okay tbf in some of the colored manga references he doesnt have that but also how else do you interpret his hair in this panel

anyways in general just throwing in some more hatching like using it more common as an art style for texture instead of just roughed up clothes/appearance would do some wonders. also softening the palettes i feel like theyve made things too dark and idk how to explain it its like they filmed the manga through a samsung camera

disclaimer i know most of these changes would cost more money and time and effort to do. the solution to most of this would probably just be to give them a bigger budget

#tbh though i didnt even care that much for the very painterly styled intro either though. its a better display of animation talent but #i feel like the tone and artstyle are very generic for the genre #and misunderstand the like... vibe that dungeon meshi is supposed to have #everything about the animes execution feels too generic tbh. like the ppl directing it themselves dont actually know #what the stories about and its themes and where things are gonna go theyre just #directly translating what they see in the present chapter straight to animated form while cutting as many corners to #fit into the episode window as they can. and to fit in the overly long cooking segment #but i feel like if they actually knew the manga they were recreating well they would know stuff like #marcille fighting namari and shuro on staying to save falin is very important characterization to be cutting out #idk. i now understand how why manga readers act the way they do about almost every anime adaptation ever

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toasteaa · 3 months

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Wait, no, I'm unwell. Neuvillette shows that he cares by being present in order to give support. Neuvillette, who doesn't accurately know how to voice his own emotions, doesn't know the "proper" way to comfort someone, goes out of his way to leave his work and be present with the people he cares about to show that he cares for them. To show sympathy for them. He views this with the upmost importance.

He understands feelings of sympathy, he knows feelings of regret. Of loss. Of mourning. He knows that often being present, even without knowing what to say, is all that is needed to show support. To show that he cares.

I need a moment, oh...

#toast talks #genshin impacted #I know I've been memeing and shooting shit this entire SQ but the root of Sigewinne's SQ is actually extremely sad #and genuinely made me a little somber going through the bulk of it.#And I know I know I should be talking anout Sigewinne and not Neuvillette but look at me. Look at me and my insanity.#You cannot just drop the fact that Neuvillette actively goes out of his way to show that he cares for those he holds dear #by being present when they need someone to lean on and not expect me to latch onto it and think about them.#Because *that* is exactly how I said he expresses concern before. It's exactly how I said he shows he cares.#He doesn't know what to say. Words of comfort do not come naturally to him. Mimicking and mirroring what humans do is one thing #but puttibg actual feelings behind it is something that he's not be able to understand or do.#Being beside someone and offering his presence just so they won't be alone...oh I can't stand it. My heart is bleeding.#GOD AND THEY DO IT TO EACH OTHER AAAAUGH 😭#They are PRESENT for each other. They show that yhey care by being around each other when they can. When they're *needed*.#I joke about Eclair coming into his office with that teasing smirk and Neuvillette's affectionate 'annoyance' but it's literally right ther #She comes to check on him because she wants to make sure he's alright. He does the same for her for the same exact reason.#She seeks him out after rough cases just to stand beside him in the rain. No matter how hard it pours.#And the first time she did it he was so confused and voiced it because most humans detest rain. Especially unexpected storms.#And she just shrugged and gave that rare sad but genuine smile.#''No one should have to weather a storm alone.''#Oh I'm unwell I'm unwell...#It makes him think on everything she's done for him. Everything she didnt have to do for him but did it anyway.#From the times that she spent fixing his fussy robes to the time she took that shot for him.#She cares for him. Not just romantically but supportively as well. She cares for his wellbeing and goes out of her way to show it.#Oh I'm going INSANE. I need to finish the actual quest before I go lie on the ground and think about them some more O(-(#eclairette

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dullahandyke · 3 months

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Films good movies good banshees of inisherin was good

#mfw a movie has irish slang in it and i am familiar with it instead of usamerican stuff #i have Some Thoughts on the setting of inisherin + the time period given the givens abt the aran islands #but nothing concrete. might meditate on it #like ok im no scholar on the aran islands ive been there a couple times ive read a couple articles thats it #but like. the tourism leaning into their image of Old Irish Villagín With Sheeps And Stone Walls basically overruns its reputation #and the islands have leaned hard into the tourism and portraying themselves as True Irish Old Villages or whatever #and thus settles the situation where like. everything about the islands pander to the tourists #the islands themselves are not doing well as places to live iirc #aging population people moving away lack of amenities and funding and resources that arent Tourism #its a gaeltacht but the tourism business mandates knowing english etc etc etc lotsa shit #like i had a school friend from an island and she was always unreachable on breaks bcos the island didnt have wifi #SO! the islands around ireland suffer from lack of facilities while bending to tourism bcos they gotta #BACK 2 BANSHEES to be clear inisherin isnt an actual island but it was filmed on inish mór and very clearly based on the arans #i like the island setting bcos of the sense of isolation it gives i think it was a good choice for the movie #HOWEVER its like. you know the thing where all irish media needs to be set in the old times #when we were all wearing aran wool jumpers and playing our little instruments and being cute historical dotes #yeah. that. compounded with the aran islands wicked having to play into that in the present day #like banshees itself isnt that bad an offender. the island setting just makes it more obvious and you could tick lines off on a bingo sheet #(shoutout to the obligatory civil war reference)#where was i going with this. im tired of weird 'back when ireland was ireland' shit being Thee thing to make art abt #this is why young offenders is the best piece of irish cinema this decade. i need to rewatch the young offenders

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swag696942069 · 11 months

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Do you guys think that Barty and Pandora still hung out after Reg, Evan, and Dorcas died? (Please say yes I'm gonna throw up!)

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pinkyjulien · 5 months

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#NOT TO BE NSFT ON MAIN #But I'm going through it... and by it I mean well... the horn knee #but like. lots of Thoughs about- HFH how Valentin is probably the first trans guy for Mitch #not that its rare by 2077 but because I HC him as demisexual #his first time was late-ish compared to his friends - he didnt had a lot of lovers - then there was Scorpion #who was more of a brother than a boyfriend but I DO HC THAT THEY ROLLED IN THE HAY Alright #But back to the thingy-- He's probably not experienced when it comes to Well Tdicks right #Mitch start to develop feelings for Val too the whole vets group start to notice it hardcore #cause these two gonkasses arent exactly subtle - they're just blind #and so one night while the vets are chillin drinkin the usual #subject comes up like eyy hows it going with V you gonna rizz him up or what #Mitch going PFFF idk what yall talkin about but he's red and suddenly don't know what to do with his hands #conversation goes and he's all like awkward cause Well Duh #Boys take showers together so everyone knows Val isnt Cis- there's others trans folks in the camp too its nothing unusual just an info #and get this... what if. its Butch Grease Queen Carol who gives him tips on how to get his boy all rilled up #while drunk ofc - Mitch wishin he could disapear from the discussion cause it's just too much but lowkey taking notes HKGJDKZKG #while some other vet goes on about how good it feels in there tm and all-- YNOW WARM N WET AND ALL #Mitch just nervously laugh and thanks them for the advices tm even if nothing will ever happen and just change the subject #he def jerk off in his tent tho cause he can't keep the vision out mH. hhhHHFHHF 👁👁#and he'd be like damn here I go doin it over a friend again and feels guilty next time he sees Val #(val def does it too in his northern appartment #idk where im going with this don't mind me JHGJ #sex is such an insignificant part of their love - its present and they explore all type of stuff together #but its not something that would ever be source of problem or doubts if that makes any sense #while simultaneously being important - cause Mitch was Val first time - and in a way Val was Mitchs first too #and his boy sure does feel nice /)UwU(\ weeeee #tbd

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tentacle-therapissed · 6 months

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SvS is great because Janus's argument is simultaneously so well crafted and also so deceptive and manipulative. Look at him go. He really fits the lawyer role to a tee

#he runs circles around thomas while interrogating him and its insane to watch #and then he's like 'the only reason you don't speed is to avoid a ticket'#and cuts off thomas when he tries to go 'or maybe its because i don’t want to die in a fucking car crash'#the whole max stirner bit is really good too cause again it's so well presented and you wanna be like ok ok go off #but then its like oh ur just gonna gloss over the relevant details of him not practicing what he preached? for the sake of ur argument? ok #+his reaction to thomas saying the trial is unfairly set up is basically just 'uhhhh ok but its not that serious though'#as if he didnt set up the entire scenario in the first place and give a whole ass Joker monologue at the witness stand like ok sure buddy #i love him he's so slippery and slimy and manipulative and charismatic #the anti hero ever #i think patton not knowing wtf he was doing also made janus look a lot smarter by comparison to be fair #he also ran circles around patton to the point where patton's interrogation of him straight up ended with janus interrogating patton instea #janus sanders #sanders sides #selfishness vs selflessness #ts janus #deceit sanders #ts deceit #and yes this is subtle lawyer shade LMAO #ive never met a lawyer that wasnt shady and corrupt af

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murderyn · 13 days

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peeks in. hi im alive (barely) just know ilu all lots and ur all super amazing and i hope you're all doing well! ( and thank u for being patient with me. i rlly RLLY wanna write and reply to stuff im just so busy i barely have time to think )

#i got home like 3 hours ago and basically spent 3 hours laying on my couch doing nothing #i didnt even take a nap (i should have tho)#i only barely gained enough energy to get up lol #i need to make dinner #eat food #go to bed #( had a busy day. filming in the morning for job and presentation in the afternoon for uni )#( both went well. im just super fucking tired lol )#🐲 ooc // i'll probably be awake to 3am for no reason

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inhidingxoxo3637 · 1 year

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Is he just proud of his ability to swear in English ORRRR is this an attempt to get them to not ask him for filming??

#english swears r DUPER easy but there is a mental image of him n gardner going through a list together #*like farck??* *no like fuhck*#*the beginning was not so bad* pipsqueak it was literally just a straight line #oh also sorry 4 being dead i didnt see stuff yesterday bc uh i did go to London and see Twice play the O2 xoxo #do not recommend london in this weather anyways what happened 2 mr arenas?#all ik is hes out so like ?? just enough to not be able to race or need i worry for mr kiddiefidds?#anyways ANYWAYS #if Acosta does well tomorrow hes gettin jumped for this botched drawing on podium !!! MAKE IT HAPPEN MX TROPHY PRESENTERS!#moto2 #pedro acosta

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dungeons-and-dragon-age · 6 months

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forever mad about how dirty they did aveline from act 2 onward

#thinking way too much abt it rn cus i just finished her quest today #she is important to liam and i enjoy their relationship a lot & also her character in general in the earlier acts #but MAN i hate what they did to her in acts 2 and 3 #laya plays dragon age #feels like there is such a disconnect from her attitude between acts 1 and 2?#or well. maybe not disconnect exactly but even so there is an important shift there and we never even get to see it OR question it #she could have been such a good contribution to the story and the themes by putting her at a crossroads of #do i keep following what i know and become another cog in the system or do i challenge them and break out of it #cus like. in act 1 she is not above going against laws when her own morals (or even just biases) go against them #but is generally still in favor of ''regular'' law and order (which does get challenged by characters sometimes which is nice!)#(sort of) blind loyalty is already a fault of hers and now her loyalty is understandably mostly towards her guards #but then her companion quest is not in fact about herself but about frickin. courting the guy she likes???????#full on i thought this was a silly quest for levity in an act that has a lot of dark moments #but no it is Her Important Quest TM and not only does she not get with him if you dont do the quest #but her entire attitude and happiness going forward depends on it????? what the hell #also fun fact first time playing act 2 i thought that there was a lot going over my head and like #and some of it did yeah but i also just Assumed that bc the way aveline acted/ the guards actions were presented through her #didnt line up with what actually happened #(& her being so defensive and dismissive didnt line up with the impression i got of her before that)#sorry for the rant im just once again mad about cool characters being screwed over by the writing

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