#programming and conditioning

[sysmedsaresexist]

Could you please dive into the RAMCOA controversy that's been going around? I've literally never heard someone say "RAMCOA is antisemitic" until like a week ago and now there's multiple blogs (I'm sure you can guess who at this point) who are saying this and calling RAMCOA a conspiracy theory from the satanic panic.

It's being said by the same 3 blogs that all reblog the same bad takes so I wasn't putting any stock in their word. Just the latest misinfo spreading unchecked, would appreciate your thoughts on this.

You know what, I'm not going to lie, I've been dreading getting this question.

Terrified. Harassment in this area of discussion is rampant.

We are currently debating making a post and how to approach it.

I will make our stances clear right now.

I think the conversation as it is now is full of misinformation and confusion. I think no single post can cover that amount of history and the theories and controversy.

I don't think anyone understands what they're arguing about, or the histories they're trying to bring up, and how they overlap. I think many members of the conversation lack access to resources and education that the mods of this blog DO have access to. Most of the links being thrown around lead back to the same single sources.

To shorten a very long, complex, and honestly unfinished conversation: the satanic panic and RAMCOA are two completely different entities. The satanic panic was a religious political movement of the 90s pushed by conservatives as a way to scare people back into church and scare women back into their "place" at home by attacking child care facilities. It called on a lot of tropes. And many of them were, yeah, ridiculously antisemitic. As the movement got more and more sensationalized, it began to call attention to therapists (some of them bad faith) and to RAMCOA survivors as a "Look! It's real!" kind of thing. If anything, this attention hurt far more than it helped. It painted an inaccurate and insulting picture that's still utilized to harm people today.

To be very clear: programmed DID is a well documented occurrence and it can occur in several ways.

We support survivors, no matter what they call it. We support clinicians trained in treating people who have gone through that extreme level of horrific abuse. We support people learning to separate fact from fiction, in whatever way that may apply to any given situation.

SAS supports ramcoa and oea survivors.

Here's something we suggest reading, though it's very long.

Stay safe, everyone ❤️

[maj77777]

[reality-detective]

CIA BLOODLINES: OBAMA, HARRIS, AND THE SYNTHETIC PUPPETS OF GLOBAL CONTROL

THIS WAS NEVER POLITICS.

THIS WAS PROGRAMMING.

Barack Obama was not “elected” — he was engineered. A CIA-manufactured Manchurian candidate, born in Kenya, raised abroad, and conditioned like a weapon. Barry Soetoro was the Agency’s first full-scale success: an MKUltra asset wrapped in a Harvard diploma and sold to America as “hope.”

His stepfather, Lolo Soetoro, was not a loving parent — he was an Agency asset embedded in Indonesia, trained in psychological suppression and eliminations.

Obama wasn’t raised.

He was programmed. 🤔

[pansyfemme]

i also hope that more people learn about therapeutic psychadellic use soon because in the very short time i’ve been documenting my experience being prescribed ketamine for depression i’m already sick of the “woah you’re on ketamine? like the horse tranqulizer?” comments. it’s pretty fascinating as a topic and has brought a lot of people relief and i think if you can understand someone using medical marijuana for their mental health you can understand this. (it’s more difficult to access and more strictly regulated, but still)

[howlsofbloodhounds]

i am not very much in the fandom so i was wondering what the consensus was on this. how do you (and just everyone in general who sees this) feel about killer's 'multiple personalities' i really love killer and i think he's great however i feel like that part of his character is a bit of a bad stereotype of DID (the evil alter, good alter trope). let me say this: i dont think killer's creator did it with malicious intent. im just confused on that part of his character because it's kind of vague. could you possibly explain your thoughts on it a bit more?

Well, im not a professional or expert on anything, but I’ll try to give it a go. Anyone can feel free to correct me if im misinformed and misspoke, or if yall simply disagree.

In terms of in universe, the general consensus, as I see it anyway, is that Killer is not human. Not even exactly like his soul isn’t human or monster, but that his body’s species is also not human.

Which means things like disorders and mental illnesses we have not only in real life, but as humans, does not apply to Killer.

There may be similarities, but they likely wouldn’t be one for one. Another consensus in universe is that, Killer is not said to be diagnosed with anything—he’s just living with and experiencing symptoms of similar possible disorders IRL.

He does not know what exactly is happening to him, he tries to make sense of and explain his experiences to the best of his knowledge and abilities in his own terms and languages.

And due to his own self perceptions, abuse, trauma and self hatred—he often dehumanizes and demonizes himself to others, especially himself when he’s in his other higher Stages.

It’s also long been established that Killer is canonically a character who struggles with a lot of suicidal ideation—not only has he attempted on his own, but when in Stage 1, he has been shown at least twice asking people to kill him (Swap and Color), which reads to me that he is seeking out assisted suicide. Not to mention how he has stated in Stage 1 that he has “accepted death a long time ago.”

Now, a bit more out of universe, I think Rahafwabas was not only really young at the time, but she did not know much English yet. If i recall correctly, she had other people translating her comics from Arabic to English for her.

Which means that not only could information had been lost in translation or mistranslated, it’s possible her language either didn’t have the means and words to explain what she was going for with Killer, or the English language didn’t or meant something else entirely.

In terms of actual disorders or similar irl, or if Killer had physically been a human with a brain, general consensus is that Killer would definitely be diagnosed with a dissociative disorder of some kind. In my opinion, I don’t think a professional would diagnose Killer with DID or P-DID.

I think he’d be diagnosed with either UDD (Unspecified Dissociative Disorder), or OSDD (identity disturbance due to prolonged intense coercive persuasion).

This can also be caused by captivity, thought reform, brainwashing, torture, programming, recruitment by cults/sects/terror organizations, being a POW, etc. This presentation of OSDD is also called OSDD-2.

These guys are not systems, however. There’s not actually much literature or research into this presentation of OSDD or how it effects a person from their experiences and perspectives—only brief descriptions.

Especially from those with OSDD-2 who were programmed, which is an inherently very complex topic even if OSDD-2 is not a complex dissociative disorder.

Now, an argument was made to me by a system recently for why Killer could be a system as well as have symptoms of OSDD-2, but I still believe Killer would not receive a diagnosis of DID, PDID, or OSDD1/1a/1b. Even if he does show and experience symptoms similar to them.

That being said, however, it cannot be denied that Killer already has canonically experienced the type of things listed in OSDD-2.

Intense prolonged coercion, coercion based dissociation, programming (literal reprogramming of his code in the game), torture, captivity, kidnapped/being held hostage, and labor trafficking.

He also shows signs of severe dissociative identity confusion and disturbance—not only does he seem to think he is not Sans anymore, just something that is wearing Sans’ face because Sans “would never kill Papyrus,” and that he said he “wants to be Sans again” in Stage 1 as if he isn’t already or still Sans, but rahafwabas has stated that his soul being like that is one of the reasons why his mind “split.”

It’s a war between two souls, Sans’ and the human Determination soul, but the Determination soul is stronger—even if Sans’ soul often ‘peeks’ out (via that white eyelight in Killer’s right eye socket, which is described as a sign of “the real Sans we know”) or forces itself/is triggered out.

And now he doesn’t know how he should behave, human or monster. He is basically programmed and likely conditioned to behave and think a certain way when in or triggered into a certain Stage—which means dissociation is always present on some level.

However, on the case of Killer being a system or experiencing himself as plural—as more than one in one body—even if not DID, PDID, or OSDD-1 I do think there’s a way to write and portray it without falling into an evil alter trope.

First would be to write other system or plural characters. Have a diverse range of different systems and plurals and don’t leave Killer as the only one.

Second is, understand Killer’s environment and situation.

(Putting a read more here because the rest can potentially be a little too much or potentially triggering.)

Understand it really is a form of extreme, organized abuse. That he is in a high control group.

That he is being trafficked by Nightmare. That he is being tortured, programmed, and conditioned. That he has to survive—and he and his potential headmates simply will not survive if they try to be good people.

Hell, they may even view themselves as only existing to do awful things and being incapable of anything else (or not knowing there is anything else, and that it’s something they could have or be)—kill and hurt when no one else can, kill and hurt on command, kill and hurt without guilt or remorse that would otherwise leave Killer unable to function and likely dead a long time ago.

(Abusers may even actively make the victim(s) believe and think that way, or they may heavily encourage it by either giving alters their names or forcibly renaming a singlet, giving them numbered names or simply calling them by their ‘role.’ Like..Killer, for example. Or even more degrading, insulting names they make their victims respond to and identify with.)

For them to live, to survive, others can’t—because being trafficked, kidnapped, in organized crime, in a high control group, means having to witness and do highly illegal and immoral things if they want to live or not be tortured themselves.

This is also where the manipulation stuff comes in. Abusers, handlers, traffickers—they want the victim to not speak out, they want them to not leave or think about leaving. They’ll do anything to ensure that.

From coercing or threatening a victim to do bad things or participate in bad things with the abusers, the abusers can then begin holding that over them.

Claiming the victim isn’t any better than them to ensure guilt and silence, saying they’ll be arrested or everyone would hate them for what they did to ensure fear of outsiders and dependency on the group, claiming that they know the victim must’ve liked it—that the victim is just like their abuser, or will be.

And that can cause feelings ranging from shame and feeling like they deserve what’s done to them and they don’t deserve help, to internalizing all of that and attempting to behave and think exactly how the abuser does. Either because they start genuinely believing they’re as bad if not worse, or because it’s a survival and/or coping mechanism.

Not to mention that those in these environments will likely eventually become desensitized to the violence they’re forced to perpetuate and/or witness, they could even try to force themselves to like it in an attempt to either make it easier or feel powerful and in control.

Other alters may be programmed or simply indoctrinated in cases of cults or types of belief systems and ideologies being implemented in abuse—they may genuinely believe that the ones hurting them are godlike, or that they can communicate with a higher power, or that a higher power will punish them if they try to leave. Especially if they’re children, or if they have no access to anything or anyone saying otherwise.

Some alters may believe this type of stuff is completely normal and okay, particularly when raised in it. It can be so severe that these types of alters could embrace the idea of their death at their abusers’ hands easily, without fear or struggle, because it’s normal to them.

This all can happen to a singlet in similar situations too. Singlets can start to genuinely believe they were born, created, or only exist to do certain things or for certain purposes—from a sex slave to a killer to a weapon, especially if they’re being trafficked.

It’s just a fact that many who experienced things that Killer did/does and managed to not only survive, but escape, likely did it in bloody and/or underhanded ways.

There was no good or bad, no moral or immoral, just what had to be done — traffickers and abusers and handlers will never just let their victims go, regardless of if they ask really nicely or not. It’s life or death. They chose life.

Or in Killer’s case (has likely died multiple times, juts can never seem to stay dead), potentially something one of his Stages (such as Stage 4) believes is worse than death. It could genuinely believe that if it doesn’t do what it does, something unbelievably horrible is going to happen. Something that would make it wish it were dead.

[cirrus-grey]

I think it's fair to say that Stolas and the Elric Rehabilitation Initiative are linked to whatever’s left of the Institute, given how much he was pushing for the Bonzo story and that we know per episode 17 that they already had their fingers in the prison systems back in the 90s, all of which is to say:

Hat tip to Mr. Newall for naming the probably-alchemy-linked "rehabilitation" center after the one character from Fullmetal Alchemist I actually know the name of.

[sysmedsaresexist]

do you have any sources documenting programmed DID?

You know, when I was in school for social work, in order to take the 3 classes on programming, cults, and treatment, I had to have a police check and go through three interviews with faculty. Each semester, this had to be redone. Three interviews, each semester.

There's a reason that a lot of the research and articles about this are hidden behind paywalls and found in specific journals by order to clinic only.

I do have sources, and several are available through Google with proper search terms, if you so desire.

I'm sorry, but I will not be linking any.

TW for the rest of this post. You can stop right here. There's zero reason to keep reading if you already agree.

This is the most I've ever said on this topic and it'll likely be the last.

Remember to mind your spoons and take care of yourselves.

Anyways, support organizations like NCMEC! Let's bring these children home!

Some of the things from my education are still burned into my brain to this day. People can be very sick. The world is a horrible place. The mind is far more malleable than people give it credit for (without even getting close to conspiracy theories).

I would love to offer sources, but this isn't a game I want to play.

I will leave it at this. Dissociative responses start small, and are caused incredibly easily. Training this response in others is easy. This can be accidental or purposeful.

Yes, it is so easy, it can happen accidentally. This is why we needed to be interviewed, because it's so easy that anyone who took that class could go and start fucking people up royally.

I am not exaggerating, I'm not telling a story. If you think it's not possible, you don't understand dissociation at all.

You don't understand how easy it is to plant that first seed of, "just relax," how easy it is to stretch that type of dissociation, and how easy it is to mold it once you notice it happening to your victim. These abusers don't start out trying to cause DID, they're trying to create silent, discrete victims by having them dissociate the discomfort and/or memories away. That happens in a lot of ways and can take a lot of sharp turns.

And so, it happens.

There are organizations that have been doing this for a very long time (particularly within trafficking, that have been in battle with various international police forces for decades) and have it down to an art. The vast majority of the time, DID is an inconvenient accident that they'll still take advantage of, because what else can they do? They want amnesia, not alters. They want complacency, not unpredictability. They want your strength and will to be crushed, not broken off.

But they still want the money. They want the work they put in to pay off.

A lot.

And more often than not, people don't go on to tell their story, unfortunately.

[maj77777]

[outnumberedsins]

Programming vs Conditioning

A common miscommunication I've seen inside and outside OEA spaces is the comparison of conditioning and programming. This is only made further complicated by the fact they exist on a similar scale, where not all conditioning is programming, but all programming is conditioning. This post serves to point out the differences between the two. Any sources may contain triggering content.

Programming

the far end of conditioning

The process of programming can be defined as "systematic torture that blocks the victim’s capacity for conscious processing, and then employs suggestion and/or classical and operant conditioning to implant thoughts, directives, and perceptions in the unconscious mind, often in newly-formed trauma-induced dissociated identities, that force the victim to do, feel, think, or perceive things for the purposes of the programmer. The objective is for the victim to follow directives with no conscious awareness." This is also referred to as Trauma-Based Coersive Mind Control, Torture Based Mind Control, or Trauma Based Mind Control (TBMC). [1]

TBMC within the community can refer to things outside of just programming. Because of this, when not referring to programming, the general term 'Mind Control' (MC) will be used to avoid confusion.

Programming uses the dissociative capacity of children, through extreme abuse and suggestion, to create alters to specifically serve the programmers needs. The purpose of programming is to have these alters respond to cues or triggers to make them perform specific acts. Ideally, the victim will not know what's going on, and a majority of the abuse will be hidden from them. [2, pg 437]

Conditioning

a natural process

There are many types of conditioning, however when comparing to programming and MC, we are more than likely referring to Classical, Operant, and Fear Conditioning. [3 pg 69, pg 88-90][4, pg 5 ] For this reason, this is what I'm going to focus on. I'm going to try my best to make this simple to understand!

Conditioning does not have to be purposeful. At its base, it's a natural process all people go through based on their environment. For example, your phone is initially a neutral stimulus, but a notification sound (conditioned stimulus) now triggers an emotional response (conditioned response.) This is an example of classical conditioning. [5]

A very simple definition of Classical Conditioning is "an unconscious process where an automatic, conditioned response becomes associated with a specific stimulus." [6]

A very simple definition of Operant Conditioning is "a method of learning that uses rewards and punishment to modify behavior." [7]

A very simple definition of Fear Conditioning is "when initially neutral stimuli, such as tones, lights, or distinctive environmental settings, are paired with aversive stimuli such as electric shocks or loud noises, which reflexively activate unconditional fear responses." A subset of Classical Conditioning. [8]

Conditioning can be considered the base for all mind control, while not being harmful in itself. Conditioning is a natural process that affects how we react and learn to our environment.

Still confused on the differences? Don't worry, we'll compare them now.

Comparison

All programming is conditioning, but not all conditoning is programming

The most important differences between these two concepts are:

1. Intentional and conscious actions (abuse)

2. The usage of dissociative parts (creating, organizing, programming)

3. Age of victim (Child, adult)

Programmers rely on multiple types of conditoning to control their victims on a higher scale. However, this relies on the creation and use of dissociative parts of a child, while conditoning by itself doesn't.

A good example of this is fear conditoning in PTSD. For example, say someone was attacked (unconditioned stimulus) by a short man (neutral stimulus). They then become fearful of other short men (conditioned response), despite knowing they're of no harm. This also happens in many other disorders, such as other anxiety disorders and OCD. [9]

The conditioned response here was not created purposely, nor did it use dissociative parts, and is possible at any age. This means it doesn't meet the requirements for programming.

But this doesn't account for purposeful actions, as may occur in abuse, so let's go over that next.

Purposeful conditioning (an example for the purposes of thought reform) has been documented in prisoners, war captives, and other abuse victims. [1]. These things are also common in cults and other high control groups, however conditioning can occur outside of organized groups.

An example of this is a victim having a conditioned behavior to 'walk on eggshells' around their abuser to avoid outbursts. In a more extreme example, prisoners of war may go through torture under the hands of their captors. This torture may focus on changing their beliefs or making them act a certian way- however, it would be an example of conditioning, not programming. This is due to the fact that programming must begin at an early age with the usage of dissociative parts. [10][1]

Despite all of this, conditioning can result in symptoms similar to programming, as they are very similar. For example:

1. The urge to go back to abuser(s)

2. False beliefs given by abuser(s)

3. Amnesia regarding abuse

etc..

The difference is the triggers and automatic reactions present in programming won't be possible from conditioning alone. If any pre-requisite isn't established (age, purpose, parts), it is not possible for conditioning to become programming.

--

Tldr: Programming is one of the most complicated versions of mind control. It utilizes conditioning and dissociative parts to make child victims perform automatic tasks according to their abusers. However, conditioning (and mind control) isn't inherently programming. A conditioned victim at any age may perform their abusers commands through terrified submission, religious indoctrination, torture, or other forms of Mind Control. These experiences are similar, but different to programming.

Myths and Misinformation

1. "Accidental' Programming.

1a. Due to the fact that it is possible to accidentally condition a person, some people have taken to assuming that programming can be accidental. This is untrue. All programming is purposeful, organized and conscious by those doing it. An abuser will need to know what they're doing in order for programming to be sucessful. An abuser does not have to know the specific science behind programming to know what they're doing works.

2. Programming is the only type of 'Mind Control.'

2a. Programming is a severe and sophisticated form of mind control, but it is not the only type, and certainly not the only kind that is perpetuated by organized abuse. You do not have to have gone through programming to be included in the 'MC' part of RAMCOA. A couple source I've listed goes into detail, here: [1][4]

3. Programming is 'More valid/More traumatizing/etc' than other types of MC.

3a. There is no valid way to measure or compare trauma. How everyone reacts to stress is different, especially children. Trauma olympics, especially among RAMCOA victims, is unecessary and harmful. You don't even have to had gone through MC to be a RAMCOA victim. Focus on healing and helping yourself- not how bad your trauma is, or how bad anyone elses trauma is.

Thank you for reading. If you have any questions, feel free to send an ask or reply to this post. A reminder that I am not a professional, I am flawed, and am just doing my best.

[coining-system-terms]

Based on my last reblog I propose using the following tags for talking about "mind control" or programming

itbc

tw itbc

itbc survivor

intentional torture based conditioning

This does not come from a place of wanted to downplay the trauma we've gone through. This comes from a place of wanting to destigmatise and demistify it to people who are not part of the community. I have personally found that explaining what I went through as "conditioning that used torture methods" made my therapist understand what I was talking about much more quickly than if I would have used terms like programming.

I also think it will remove a lot of back and forth about "what is mind control" "what is programming" because conditioning is a very basic psychological theory and is simple to explain and understand. I hope the community agrees or wants to talk about this because I'm very interested in it as a topic.

[kismetnyx]

Nothing feels as good as giving in to yourself...

Into desire, your true nature...

Freedom is giving up control.

[howlsofbloodhounds]

Do you think Killer would ever attack or threaten Beta? How would the Epic Sanses to it (aside from the obvious protective violence from Delta)?

What would be the reason for doing so, outside of being in higher Stages and unable to control himself or understand what’s going on, or having any possible coding/conditioning being triggered and physically reacting/acting before his mind can catch up and he can consciously think it through?

I’d imagine this is something Color was very much aware of if it’s a known concern, and has plans for if he were to ever introduce Beta to Killer, or allow Killer around Beta—and he’d definitely would’ve roped Delta and Epic in prior, with Killer’s consent.

Outside of any potential conditioning or dissociative trauma responses, what reason would Killer have to target the kid specifically? If he doesn’t trust the kid, or doesn’t trust himself not to hurt them, I’d imagine he’d avoid him to his upmost ability —and in Stage 1, he would want to protect Beta from himself.

He’d be upfront about warning the kid to stay away or don’t trust him when he’s “like that”—and knowing how Killer is in Stage 1, he’d paint himself in a demonizing, evil, scary light—especially if it scares Beta enough into staying far away.

One reason I can possibly see Stage 2 being interested in Beta specifically, is possibly because of his soul—merged with Delta’s, a monster’s—and wanting to study it and its codes. However, Beta and Delta are Color’s dearest friends, and Killer did say he wants to change.

I suppose it’s a matter of if he can hold back on that impulsive curiosity, especially when he’s painfully bored and may want to both kill his boredom by fulfilling his curiosity, impulses, and stirring up something that’ll help him feel more real or alive—like trying to cause a fight with Delta, provoking physical violence to feel pain, via threatening Beta. Even if he has no actual intentions or plans to do anything.

[raineandsky]

#73

(part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4) (part 5) (part 6) (part 7) (part 8) (part 9) (part 10) (part 11)

tw: blood

The late shift was never particularly kind to the villain. It’s when villains are the most active—and so the heroes are more so too. The cover of night is meant to make crime easier, but the heroes are out in droves at this time and the cover of night turns out to, actually, not cover shit.

Their front door clanks shut behind them, a relieved sigh slipping from their lips. Their eyes trace down the hall—to their bedroom, hell yes—and catch their kitchen door swinging shut.

The evening’s tiredness is evaporated in a second. The villain’s hand is inside their coat on instinct, the feeling of the well-loved knife hilt in their hand a much-needed comfort as they start down the hall.

They push the door open slowly, wishing that they oiled its hinges last week. They peer inside from the safety of the hallway—there’s… nothing in there. It’s just as they left it this afternoon. Except, no, wait—

There’s a handprint on their windowsill. Shiny, still wet, and crimson red.

Invisibility is a habit by now. They glide through the kitchen quietly, their footsteps practised, their coat blending them into the gloom, to glance down at the blood staining the wood. They look outside, back in, across the kitchen. What the– this bitch has been in their fridge.

They open it, letting the light blind them momentarily. Well, there’s a lot of food they’re going to have to throw out now. Specks of blood taint most of this. They glance back, the yellowing light brightening the room and their face, and they hear a very muffled, presumably very unintentional, “shit”.

The fridge slams shut and sinks the room back into darkness. There’s a red trail trickled over the tile floor, leading straight to their pantry.

The villain adjusts their knife in their grasp, creeping towards the little cupboard. They pause outside, heaving a heavy sigh in preparation before tugging the door out and thrusting their blade into the darkness beyond. 

“This is no place for a petty thief,” they say whilst their eyes adjust. It’s darker in there without the streetlamps outside invading. “I’m giving you a chance to get out before I cut you to shreds.”

Someone squeaks from inside. “P–Please don’t!” they cry, and the villain squints suspiciously. They can just see the figure of the person pressed into the back of their pantry.

They fumble for the light switch, showering the tiny room in dull light. Of all people the villain expected to rob them, well, they weren’t really expecting to see—

“[Hero]?” they demand incredulously, and the hero winces. They squeak again when the villain gets the mind to shove their knife against their throat. “How the hell do you know where I live?”

“I– I don’t!” the hero cries. “I didn’t know you lived here, I swear!”

The villain narrows their eyes disbelievingly. “So, what? You break into people’s houses now? Doesn’t sound very agency-friendly.”

The hero’s eyes nervously slip to the bloodstained fridge behind them. “I– I’m hiding.”

An admission of weakness. They’re hiding.

Sirens shriek outside. Blue and red dance merrily on the ceiling. “From what?”

“From [Superhero].”

From the superhero. The villain doesn’t doubt that they’re hiding. The hero looks terrified—though they do have a knife slowly drawing blood at their throat, they suppose. But from the superhero?

“Why?”

The hero swallows nervously. They won’t meet the villain’s eye. “I did something wrong,” they say quietly. “Really wrong. [Superhero]’s practically out for my blood now. I can’t be trusted.”

The sound that comes out of the hero is either a laugh or a sob. It’s hard to tell. “So you’re hiding from him,” the villain finishes.

The hero nods before they remember the blade resting on their skin. “Yeah.”

“And so you’re hiding… in my pantry.”

“... Yeah.”

“And you helped yourself to some of my fridge.”

The hero has the decency to flush in embarrassment. “I’ll replace it. I was desperate.”

“Give me one good reason I shouldn’t kill you right now,” the villain says lowly, “or throw you back into the street.”

Clearly the hero didn’t think this far. They lick their lips, their wide-eyed gaze finally meeting the suspicious squint of the villain’s. “I can– I could do something for you?”

“You dying would do me a great favour.”

The hero swallows again, and their stare turns nervously outward again. “I– I don’t know. I don’t have any of my weapons, I’m not dangerous.”

“You get in fist fights.”

“I usually lose those.”

The hero laughs, the sound taut with anxiety. The villain leans away from them slightly, letting their blade sit a little lighter on them. “I have an idea,” they say flatly.

“Yeah,” the hero says instantly.

“I need a maid.” The hero’s face falls slightly at the wording, and the villain grins ecstatically. “I have the clothes. You work on my whim, without snooping, and you can sleep on the sofa.”

“Isn’t there anything less humiliating I could do?” they ask quietly. God no, the villain thinks. The humiliation is part of the fun.

“I could let you stay in my basement,” they offer pointedly, and the hero grimaces, “if you’re so attached to the clothes you’re wearing.”

Sirens whoop outside. The villain glances at the blood trails on the floor. “I’m going to clean this up before your friends inevitably bust the door down,” they say. “We can talk business when I get rid of them. Stay in there. If I so much as hear from you, they can have you. Got it?”

The hero nods numbly. “Yeah.”

And with that, the villain flicks the light off and slams the door on them.

Cleaning is easy enough, though they’ll need to mop later—or the hero will. They turn over a few pieces of furniture, drag a few drawers open, and then they casually let themself out the front door with a giant, full backpack.

The police are exactly where they wanted them. They spot the villain halfway out of the garden.

“Thief!” one of them cries. “Stop in the name of the law!”

The villain turns on their heel and bolts for the back of the house.

This part is easy. Lose the police in the city, wait for them to clear out from their house, loop back home. They’ll never suspect that the villain lives there. God, they’d have some problems if they did.

The next part is the fun one. They have a hero to blackmail—and by god, are they going to use that to their advantage.

Next part

[maj77777]

[ame-to-ame]

still working on tweening and etc but small self-indulgent sneak peek hehe

[radiomogai]

hi we're back to rant more about the inherent exclusionism found within online communities

okay so we're traumagenic, most likely disordered (but we don't like labelling any specific, we just suffer a lot of dissociation + dp/dr), and we don't really understand why stuff around programming feels so. exclusive. of those who don't have a specific type of trauma from xyz.

like it wasn't organized but we were part of a larger online cult in which we were groomed and scapegoated with extreme frequency. and it wasn't the kind of programming that's often described, but moreso generally conditioned to accept the abuse inflicted upon us as "normal".

if we don't fit in one box or another, where do we fit? are we "traumatized enough" to be among those who suffered worse?

it gets even worse when we directly avoid anyone who labels themselves as an "anti" of anything, because of said larger online cult and the trauma surrounding it.

people in mogai + traumagenic plural communities feel way too comfortable gatekeeping terms and resources from those who don't perfectly fit into a box of "good survivor". just like how we weren't a "good victim". it sucks. do better.

from what we know, there are several reasons for that sort of exclusivity. one is due to the terms being directly and explicitly connected to the experiences of that sort of trauma {much in the same way an autigender related to a show is exclusive to autistics. allistics can be a gender related to that same show, but the autigender is exclusive as it directly ties in to the experiences of being autistic as well, which allistics do not have}, another is due to disbelief and fakeclaiming around traumas like those, another is common differences in function between programmed and non-programmed systems {like the idea of "the system is there to protect you" is often not true in programmed systems}

we have seen discussions comparing and contrasting conditioning and programming, but i'm not confident enough on the subject to speak on it

unfortunately i don't have an answer for you on where you fit in, sorry

overall this isn't a topic we're really able to discuss, sorry. we don't know enough and we're not comfortable with it