#prolonging the healing process further

[hungerofhadarr]

Do You Know What Dry Socket Is?

Informational post about something a lot of people might be unaware of.

So, let’s say you loose a tooth. You fell and knock it out, maybe you pulled it at home for whatever reason. All that is important in this scenario is that you’ve lost a tooth outside of a dentist visit, so there is no field professional there to walk you through the healing process.

Now, how do you recover from this? Saltwater rinse, wad of cotton to help slow the bleeding, painkillers, eating soft foods. It stands to reason that, like any other recovery period that involves the mouth and teeth, you’d also need a straw. Makes sense, easier to get liquid into your mouth and you’ll have more control over where in your mouth it goes. Makes sense, right?

You are about to give yourself dry socket.

The main difference between most other well known recovery periods from a jaw / mouth injury, is that the act of sucking on a straw can dislodge the blood clot from your gums.

The reason is, for a few days, your blood clot is actually smaller than the hole left behind by the missing tooth. Gums do heal quicker than most other tissue on your body , so the opening will close to be smaller than the blood clot itself. But there is a period of time, the first few days of healing, that the blood clot is at a serious risk of coming loose or being dissolved away . This risk does not truly go away until healing is over , but the likelyhood slowly goes down.

This blood clot being removed will reveal the traumatized and damaged nerve + the jaw bone to the open . Unsurprisingly, this is extraordinary pain, that nothing can soothe. Any fluid gets into the wound ? Food particles ? You inhale / exhale too hard ? That nerve is going to Ache. Not to mention , you’ re at an even higher infection risk now .

And the things that can cause dry socket are so innocuous , that unless you know about the possibility , you may do these actions without thinking.

1) Straws ( and Sucking )

The pressure from drinking through a straw is enough to pull the blood clot from your gums . This pressure can be caused by anything that requires sucking , this includes smoking as well . Anything that requires a strong pull into your mouth to eat / ingest is exerting the same pull on your loose blood clot . If you suck on a straw now , you can feel the kind of pressure vacuum you make in your mouth . That pressure does not care about what it might cause to dislodge .

2) Spitting Out Blood

At least , for the first 24 hours . After 24 hours ( specifically , after your gums stop consistently bleeding ) and you start doing saltwater rinses , you’ re free to spit . But regardless , forceful spitting can do the exact same damage as drinking from a straw . It’ s the pressure and force you cause . When you do saltwater rinses , don’ t really swish. Tilt your head side to side and slowly push the water around . For the first 24 hours , you are encouraged to swallow blood instead of spitting , to avoid the risk of spitting out the start of a blood clot and prolonging the bleeding cycle . Keep in mind the nausea this can cause .

3) Alcohol and Hot Food/Liquid

Paring these together since they cause similar issues . Alcohol can melt a blood clot , and abundance of heat can increase blood flow too the clot . Both of these will cause the clot to dissolve or come loose , but cold food/drink is more recommended . Yes , cold can cause an ache if it manages to come into direct contact with the healing area , but it will not affect the blood clot as seriously as hot food/drink will . Room temperature is also okay for consumption.

4) Exercise

Light exercise is okay , but anything that ups your heart-rate is upping blood flow to your wound . Nothing strenuous, nothing that pushes endurance , nothing that you know will exhaust you . Even if you heart-rate jumps from something like chasing a cat down because they have something they shouldn’ t have can cause increased blood flow ( trust me , it felt like I was undergoing divine punishment because I stopped my cat from eating a tuff of dog hair . ) The sudden taste of blood is a warning to slow down what you’re doing .

While dry socket can heal on it’s own, the gums will cover the exposed bone regardless of if there’s a clot there or not, this pain is not something anyone deserves to struggle with . Once again , dealing with dry socket is dealing exposed bone and nerve .

Dentists are expensive , and if you cannot afford a dental visit after the loss of a tooth, I only want you to be aware of one of the more serious complications that come with such a thing happening . Everyone deserves to heal in comfort , and I only want people to have the best chance at having a complication free healing process .

[inevitablysomber-dark]

Ladybug (Chapter 3)

Intensely Dark! Rafe Cameron x Acutely Aware! Reader

WARNING: Non-Consent, Manipulation, Kidnapping, Stalking, forced interactions, Causing trauma, unhinged obsession. MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY. MINORS DNI

Summary: After a fresh breakup with her ex, Kyle, a chance encounter leads to an entanglement between Ladybug and her friend, Sarahs, volatile brother, Rafe, who had long standing conflicts with her friends. However, what began as an accidental hookup, quickly spirals into a troubling situation as Rafe's infatuation takes a darker turn. His fixation becomes a source of distress, as his persistent harassment disrupts Ladybugs Peace.

Series Masterlist

The encounter with Rafe left an unsettling feeling lingering within you. As you retraced your steps back to John B's residence, a persistent unease had you glancing over your shoulder, an instinctual response to the sense of being watched.

Nevertheless, you successfully navigate your way, unscathed by any further incidents. Entering the Chateau, you found yourself contemplating the path forward. Surveying John's modest dwelling, you acknowledged that a prolonged stay there wasn't a realistic option. Your financial resources, built from your mother's contributions, neighborhood odd jobs, and modest online ventures, weren't bottomless.

Your attention shifted to the Lazy Boy chair, a long-standing fixture with a conspicuous stain. A sigh escaped you as you rose from your seat, conducting a visual sweep of the living space, intentionally avoiding John B's room. To your relief, you stumbled upon a small closet stocked with untouched cleaning supplies.

Without hesitation, you embarked on a cleaning mission. Recognizing that merely dousing the couch with Febreze wouldn't suffice for the questionable air quality in John B.'s living room, you aimed for a more comprehensive solution. Organizing scattered paperwork into a neat box discovered beneath the dining room table, you proceeded to dust, sweep, and mop the living area. Taking it a step further, you wrestled the Lazy Boy outside, subjecting it to a thorough wash. While not achieving pristine cleanliness, the prominent stain was significantly diminished.

As you finished your cleaning spree, you couldn't help but feel a sense of accomplishment. The Chateau, once filled with the typical disarray of a bunch of friends sharing a space, now had a renewed freshness. The air felt lighter, and you hoped the environment would contribute positively to your own healing process.

John B. and JJ walked in, seemingly surprised by the transformation. "Wow, did you hire a cleaning crew or something?" JJ asked.

You chuckled, "No, just needed to do something productive."

John B.nodded in appreciation, "Well, thanks. It looks great in here."

You nod “No Problem, and by the way I’ll be making dinner soon, if you’re interested”

“I definitely am” JJ responds 

“Totally just let us know when it’s ready.” John B. nods before he and JJ head outside to do god knows what. Engaging in your newfound routine, you migrated to the kitchen, initiating the task of preparing dinner—Mac and Cheese with cut-up hot dogs. Anticipating the possible arrival of the other pogues, you opted for two boxes to accommodate everyone. While orchestrating the meal, your gaze swept across the kitchen, prompting a realization that it could be your next cleaning endeavor. Contemplating the prospect of future projects—perhaps extending to the porches and the yard—you found solace in having something to occupy your time, a purpose emerging from the mundane tasks.

And  It turned out your anticipation was accurate, as the other pogues eventually made their way to John B's place. While John and JJ were outdoors, Sarah arrived and opted to stay inside, providing you with some company.

Pope arrived with his peculiarly defined girlfriend, Dragonfly. Their relationship was enigmatic; despite her denial of them dating, their actions spoke otherwise. Occasional hugs and kisses added layers of confusion. She was amiable enough, but their dynamic left you puzzled.

As Pope prepared to join the boys outside, Dragonfly chose to remain behind, accepting a kiss on the cheek before Pope's departure. You exchanged a glance with Sarah.

"There's Mac and Cheese with cut-up hot dogs if you want any," you offered.

"Maybe later," Pope responded before heading out.

"I'll have some," Dragonfly sighed, heading into the kitchen to fix herself a plate.

Meanwhile, Sarah stayed, engrossed in her phone.

"Can you believe Topper is still sending me 'I miss you' messages?" Sarah asked.

"Isn't he dating that girl... um?" Dragonfly began, struggling to recall Topper's current girlfriend's name.

"Butterfly," you supplied.

"You're not responding, are you?" you inquired.

She looked at you for a moment before responding, "No, I think it's gross."

Though you weren't entirely satisfied with her answer, you had no reason to doubt Sarah's honesty. She didn’t know about Kyle, since you’ve had yet to let her know, but  you had also kept her in the dark about what had happened with Rafe, since even you weren’t so sure what went on that night.

"Anyways," she shifted her attention back to her phone, "Rose and my Dad are going out next week and said I could have a little get-together. You guys in?" she asked.

"Sure," Dragonfly agreed.

"You know I'm up for it," you replied before adding, "Rafe's not going to be there, is he?"

"No, I'll make sure of it," Sarah assured, raising her eyebrows.

Sarah got up and said, "Alright, I'll go let the boys know," leaving you with Dragonfly.

"The macaroni is good," Dragonfly remarked between forkfuls.

"Thank you," you sighed.

Thinking about your next endeavor within the Chateu.

That was when Kie had shown herself, “Wow, it’s so clean here.” she said

***

The get-together Sarah had planned started out small and simple, just the pogues playing games, enjoying each other's company, and sharing stories. Everything was going well until Rafe walked in with his own group of friends.

Glancing over at you, he then turned to Sarah and explained that it was his house as well, and he had the right to host his own "get-together." An argument ensued for about 15 minutes, with Sarah insisting that she and her friends weren't leaving. Rafe shrugged and said he didn't care, proceeding with his friends toward the kitchen. Despite the rapid beating of your heart, you hoped that would be the end of it.

However, within an hour, what was meant to be a small gathering had transformed into a full-blown house party, with the pogues scattered in various directions. Pope and Dragonfly stayed on the couch cuddling, while you assumed Sarah was with John B. Kie and JJ were nowhere to be found.

Standing in the kitchen with a red solo cup of water in hand, you contemplated whether you should just go home. Your gaze swept across the island, and into the living room and you noticed a pair of bright blue eyes staring back at you from the living room.

Your heart began to race. Since Rafe had shown up, you had implemented a strategy to replace his presence wherever he went, aiming to avoid direct interaction. If you saw him come inside, you would go outside; if he moved from the living room, you would move to the living room, and so on. The hope was that he wouldn't return to a place he previously occupied.

He smirked before advancing toward you, prompting you to abandon your strategy and rush outside. The goose chase began, and for a while, you managed to elude Rafe's grasp, navigating through the sweaty bodies of individuals under the influence. However, a crucial mistake led you upstairs instead of heading home.

You knew it was only a matter of seconds before Rafe found you, and though part of you wanted to confront him and tell him to back off, you recognized that you weren't in the right headspace for such an encounter. Seeking refuge, you locked yourself in the bathroom.

Soon, you heard footsteps, assumed to be Rafe's, wandering around the second floor and opening different doors. One door opened, followed by a scream, and then Rafe's disappointed "really?" You figured he had caught someone engaged in extracurricular activities before closing the door again. His footsteps faded away, disappearing altogether, and for a brief moment, you believed you were in the clear. However, uncertainty lingered, so you decided to stay in the bathroom for another 45 minutes to ensure he wasn't lingering in the hall. The quiet, tense minutes passed before you finally sighed in relief, rushing out with a plan to head straight home.

Unfortunately, the plan fell to pieces to moment you ran into Rafe. You look up to find him smirking as if he'd won your little game.

"Where you been?"

He quickly grabs you lifting you from your feet and forcing you into his bedroom. You screech as you struggle to get away but, he slaps his hand against your mouth. He manages to get you in and your stomach drops when you hear the door shut. 

He drops you to the ground, before you hear him locking the door, cementing your fate.

You struggle to back away as Rafe gives you his full attention. Another struggle ensues as he lifts you from the floor and drags you along the bed.

“I’m gonna need you to be a good girl, and take care of me again,” he says, you feel prickles form along your neck at his statement. “Rafe, I’m scared, I wanna go home,” your body trembled as you tried to move away, but Rafe was bigger and heavier than you. “You can go home when I’m done,” he states, before pushing his lips against your own. 

You take the opportunity to bite him as hard as you can, and in that moment decidedly push him off of you. Unfortunately you didn’t have enough force to get him off, so you were stuck as he grabbed you by the neck, choking you out before slapping your face. The pain of the slap, and lack of air you were unable to take in, forced you into a panic attack. Tears forming in your eyes, as Rafe gets really close, his own nose touching your own. “We can make this easy or hard, I'm getting my way regardless.” he growls.

You frantically nod, as your vision starts to blur and darken, willing to give him anything as long as he doesn't kill you. Rafe waits a beat letting you stew, in what you assumed he thought was a punishment, before letting go. Your vision starts coming back, as coughs erupted from your lungs as your body struggled to breathe. 

Not allowing you a moment of calm, Rafe lays on top of you trying again to place his lips over yours. This time there was no fighting back, you stayed still as you allowed him to do as he pleased, tasting the blood from the bite wound on his lip. “Kiss me back,” at first you ignore him, keeping still as you grapple with the fact that Rafe managed to get his hands on you again. Then you felt the tickle of his fingers against your neck. “I said to fucking kiss me back,”. Your lips begin moving against his own, charged by fear and the possibility of how this could end. 

You feel him everywhere, all over your body and eventually all under your clothes. Before you know it, he’s nestled between your legs pushing his member inside you as he latches his mouth over your nipple. 

His movements were careful, as if he didn’t want to break you, but it was too late for that wasn’t it. The true horror came when pleasure started building in your lower abdomen, your legs tightening around him as his movement became more erratic. “Fuck,” he gasps before looking down at you. 

You’re sure he’s facing your weeping visage, but the bright smile shining on his face, made it seem like you too were enjoying what was being done to you, it didn’t help that your body tensed with pleasure and a chuckle resonates from his throat as he feels you tighten around him. 

He presses his mouth to yours with a final thrust, and you can feel as his seed spills into your body. 

His sweaty body collapses on top of you, and you feel his breath against the side of your face. You can’t help the next words that come out of your mouth. “Is that what you did last time,” He looks at you, and just laughs.

Tags: @applelovesposts

[thevirgodoll]

you should never fight someone for their healing. it has to be a decision from within. sometimes one must reap to have an epiphany.

as much as you want to help save a person from themselves, you’re only prolonging their healing process further. you're encouraging self sabotage not only for them, but for yourself.

you have to stay in your lane. just as you found your own way to your destination, you have to allow others to do the same.

healing doesn't involve telling others how to heal, but showing others by example what the other side can look like. they have to make their choices on their own.

you are a catalyst for change by changing yourself. stop trying to control everyone around you. rest.

[prinnamon]

i was gonna comment this under a youtube video but at this point i think it needs to be its own post.

sometimes i forget how frustrating Xen was to play because i adore it so much from a narrative standpoint. throughout the entirety of half-life 1, you are fighting creatures who have been ripped from their natural environment and thrust into an unfamiliar place. some of them are sentient but enslaved, having no choice but to fight you and aid the invasion of Earth. some of them have an intelligence more comparable to animals, and they are reacting to the situation as animals react, fighting and utilizing their own evolved defense mechanisms to prolong their own lives, but since this harms us and others we are forced to see them as a threat and eliminate them.

Xen puts the player in the position of the alien, ripped from your home and sent somewhere totally unlike anything you have seen before. you have no frame of reference, nothing to which to compare your surroundings. every outside stimulus is completely new and you have to process it all at once every second with no prior experience to draw from. and the things here, whether they mean to be or not, are hostile to you, so you have to fight back. gordon is now in the position of Houndeye #274 who was eebied from its relaxing healing spring into the bright unwelcoming halls of Black Mesa!!! i think it could even be argued that gordon's position is almost even analogous to that of the Vortigaunts, since we learn later that gordon was manipulated somewhat by forces outside his control, and for all the talk about him being a "free man," he never had much choice but to do what he did if he wanted to survive.

in my mind, these are some of the core themes of hl1: humans aren't alone, humans aren't benevolent, and humans are kind-of fucking terrifying from an outsider's perspective. the nihilanth bossfight reinforced that for me, because the only way the player can win is by behaving like a persistence predator. humans' strength isn't in their raw power. if that was the only factor in the fight between the player and the nihilanth, the player would lose. it's because no matter how frustrating it is, the player has patience to keep pushing forward, to keep removing themself from the places where the nihilanth tries to get rid of them, to chip away at the boss's health and destroy the things giving it power. going a step further up the ladder of abstraction, the player may die and get teleported away from the fight dozens of times, but they have the power to quicksave and reload for a better outcome. some people may put the game down, but chances are if you got that far in the game you persist through the tedium and win.

from the nihilanth's perspective, the entire fight is like that scenario where you are immortal but somewhere in the world there is an also-immortal and indestructible snail that kills you if it touches you and it is always approaching you no matter what but you never know where it is unless you can see it. that's what the player is. the player is a very slow-moving but deadly force that will inevitably always win by virtue of the fact that it does not tire (can pause, recuperate, and return to the fight at any time) and it does not want anything except to destroy its opponent (literally cannot leave without doing so).

and since that impacted me so much, i conveniently forget about the bullshit jumping puzzles along the way

[super-sextual-stories]

I’m reading The Beauty of the Experience and oh my is it amazing! Chapter 28’s ending had me laughing like you wouldn’t believe. I wanted to ask, since Andy seems to be figuring out on her own what caused her parents separation, would she ever ask Lena or Andrea? Is that something her siblings or her will ever know? I ask because there’s a point where some things are just hard to hide and we also reach a point in life where we see people for who they are. And given that at some point white lies as described in the story can potentially become hurtful. Lena also mentions in thought that she hates lying to them. Would they see the pregnancy as yet another lie? In essence I guess what I’m trying to say is that even though they keep the kids in the dark to protect them they eventually come out of the dark themselves by picking up on things even if they don’t know what’s going on they pick up on emotions, body language, tone of voice etc. As Lillian points out they deserve to know. And further lying or prolonging of the truth can make it worse(by this I mean them realizing they knew a different version of the person that wasn’t the true version everyone knew because I think as people even if it was their parent they wouldn’t want to be around a person like that) But I like to think based on how you write them even if they hold back information from them Andy & Sophia, especially Andy, knows what’s up. That’s just the musings of my mind.

Gosh I meant to answer this a while back because it’s such a fantastic question! But here we are on chapter 30, so please forgive me.

One of the reasons I love writing this AU so much is because of the complexities and layers involving the kids, Andrea’s transgressions, and Lena’s attempts to protect her kids from the truth of how horrible her ex was. That being said, you’re right! White lies, while intended to be kind, end up no different than straight up lies the longer they drag on. And kids are magnificent sponges that just absorb everything around them, especially when you try to keep them in the dark.

Andy is undoubtedly smart and due to being the eldest she’s definitely more aware of Andrea’s behavior. She’s certainly pieced together enough to guess at what went down, and her little digs at Andrea hopefully make that clear. Sophia internalized a lot of what she witnessed with Andrea, and she’s coming to terms with what she processed and how she feels now that she’s growing into someone different from Andrea. There will be a point when Lena (and Andrea) will have to outright explain why their marriage dissolved because of Andrea’s infidelity. With any luck, it might help them begin to heal from it as a family, but if you're curious to how they’re all getting along so far, Chapter 36 is now on my Patreon and Chapter 30 is up on ao3.

[earanemith]

Promises made

Chapter 3: Abba Please!

Here is is the newest chapter. Please be warned. Big emotions in this one. It's a long one so you might be more comfortable to read it either on ff.net or ao3

Read on ao3 or fanfiction

With the morning sun Miriam entered Ziva David's room as she did every morning. Going through her checklist of moving to prevent bedsores, checking for infection and writing down vital signs in the chart. It saddened her to see the girl so hurt and alone. She wondered if Liat who she met when Ziva was brought in had known when she left, that she would be the only person that would come for Ziva. That when she left there would be no one ells. No family no friends.

After the first week there had been a slight flare round the newly put in metal frame. A round of antibiotics and ointment had taken care of that. There were scans preformed on Ziva's brain to check if the activity had been steady and no further complications. The second week had finally progressed as doctor Raviv had hoped. After the scan results showed the good news they lessened the dose of narcotics pumping through their patients body. A high enough dose to keep her sedated and pain free. Yet not so strong they kept her in a full coma.

After the third week they had switched her to another medication gradually. After another round of scans and blood tests. Scans clear and the blood test showing that there was no trace of infection left. Liana Raviv having declared the healing process had started enough to get Ziva to wake up. For staying in a prolonged medical coma or sedation was never good for a patient. Sometimes some pain but awake was better than no pain and oblivion. So far Ziva had not shown any signs of waking up, even though the medication keeping her under had to be completely out of her system by now.

After four weeks when Miriam entered Ziva's room in the morning she was pleasantly surprised to see the chair next to Ziva's bed was now occupied instead of empty.

"Glad to see you are back" she said as a form of greeting. "By the looks of you I'd say you came straight from an airplane, no?" Seeing the affirmation in Liat's eyes without the young woman having to say anything. "Now that makes me think you are not simply here on orders as you proclaimed weeks ago are you dear?"

"No. Ziva is my friend. I only said that because I did not want her to be alone. She protected me all my life. Now it's my turn"

For a moment a peaceful silence swept over the two women. After a moment Miriam took up her tasks checking up on Ziva and changing the pillows around her to prevent sores.

"I had thought she would have woken up by now" Miriam having never heard the woman before her speak with such a small voice. Always speaking with authority that seemed to have left her right now.

With a smile and a squeeze to the woman's shoulder Miriam slipped in her nurse role. "Doctor Raviv is happy with the healing process so far. We have been slowly weaning Ziva off of the medication keeping her sedated. Ziva's body has sustained a lot of trauma, it needs to heal"

" When will she wake up?"

"She had been on only pain medication for the last week. No changes. The fact that Ziva has not woken up yet is because her own body is keeping her asleep. Now before I say this I want you to know that I have every fate in your friend that she will wake up but.... in some cases the body is not able to wake back up again. That is why we keep the ventilator on her. To try and make the process as easy on her body as we can make it, I am glad to report that her vital signs have been steady. The rest is up to Ziva herself. Her vital signs are strong."

It was the last thing Liat had wanted to hear. It seemed as if Ziva was not out of the danger zone yet. She might not wake up, her friend might be lost forever. When Miriam had left was when Liat finally let the tears she held onto for the last weeks fall. Since the death of her father and arrest of her mother she had not cried.

- -

Every moment she could spare she spent at Ziva's bedside. The upsides of her job was that between missions most time was spent either typing up reports of the mission, which she could do on her laptop at Ziva's bedside. Or keeping her training up. Every night she made sure to stay with Ziva, willing her to wake up. After four days it happened.

It was as if she was underwater, heavy, no light around her. Trying to swim to the surface seemed impossible. There were snippets of words of voices she heard. Her mind tried to make sense of it but being unable to do so. Keep trying, she tried to tell herself, try to surface. After what seemed like an eternity had passed she was finally able to will herself above the water. Her lids heavy as she opened her eyes. She felt someone grab her hand. Eyes not being able to focus. Being above water and not being able to breathe she started to stress. Her lungs begging for oxygen she thought she would get being above the water now.

"Miriam!" Liat yelled as she pressed the help button as soon as she saw Ziva open her eyes. Unfocussed eyes, even so she recognized the look in them. Ziva was scared the ventilator and heart monitor going crazy.

The calling of her name and the signal from the room had Miriam hasting to the room. Entering she saw why she was called. Ziva had woken up.

"It's okay, it's okay" she tried to sooth the woman freaking out in the bed. "Her body is fighting the ventilator, tripping it up, wanting to breathe on its own. She does not know what happened. I got the okay from doctor Raviv to take it out" she hastily said to Liat seeing her just as freaked out as Ziva.

"Okay, stay still, it will be okay in a second. Deep breath, one, two and cough" she told Ziva as she pulled the tube out of her. While Ziva was coughing an gasping for air she listened to her lungs. Luckily clear. She tested Ziva's eyes for responds with her penlight.

"It is okay, you are safe here. You were in a coma. Is okay." trying her best to calm and inform Ziva whom she saw had a slightly dazed look in her eyes. Grabbing both of her hands. "Can you squeeze my hands for me." Feeling Ziva squeeze back "good, good. Can you tell me your name?" The question seeming obvious but they needed to check her brain as fast as they could to exclude any brain damage.

Her voice barely there "Ziv"

"Good, good, can you tell me where you are? Do you remember"

"Hosp'l" Ziva answered

"yes, good. Now your throat and voice will feel strange for a while you have had a tube down your throat. If you have any pain you let us know." Turning to Liat "She is okay. Still a bit out of it but okay. She probably will be very tired, if so let her sleep, if you notice any signs of pain call me. Doctor Raviv will be by later today"

At those words Liat could finally relax. Ziva was awake. She was okay. Walking a couple of steps closer to where Ziva's head was. Placing her face directly in her line of sight. "hey, good to see you back Ziva"

With a slurred "Lia.." Liat saw Ziva's eyelids drop

"It's okay, you did good. Sleep Ziva"

- -

Ziva had slept for a couple of hours before waking up again. Seeming a little bit clearer then before but still not quite there. Liat had taken to softly speaking to her. Telling her again she was in the hospital in Israel. Filling the rest of the time with telling Ziva all about the country she had been in on her latest mission. Sensing talking took too much of the limited energy Ziva had at the moment. That was when doctor Raviv entered.

"Hello Ziva. It is good to see you awake. My name is Liana Raviv I am your doctor. I would like to do a couple of quick tests to see how you are" She repeated the same set of test Miriam had taken when Ziva had just woken up. "Very good. Everything is looking good. Are you in any pain"

"No" Ziva replied. Her voice still hoarse.

"If that changes let me or the nurses know. Try to rest as much as possible." Turning to Liat "When she is awake try to engage her." Back to Ziva "Now eating is not yet possible but drinking is. I'll have Miriam bring you some ice chips. Your friend will be able to help you. Let them melt in your mouth they will help with the soreness in your throat. For now rest. I will be back tomorrow."

When Liana got to the hall she heard someone behind her.

"Doctor Raviv? Why did you not tell her anything about her injuries?" Liat wanted to know.

"Ziva is too much out of it for now. Her body has had to sustain a lot. I would like her a lot more coherent before I start to explain anything to her. If we were to tell her now she either would not comprehend it and we'd have to explain it again or it could send her stress levels up. Something I'd rather avoid. Enjoy her being awake. Grant her a couple of days free of worry and hardship. She'll need those days once she is clear enough. As I told you before the road to recovery will not be an easy one."

- -

The rest of the day was spent between Ziva dozing off and Liat feeding her ice chips and reading. Liat only leaving for short periods when Ziva was sleeping to either go to the bathroom or grab a quick bite to eat.

That night Liat woke up several times due to Ziva. In her dreams see seemed to sometimes become distressed. Not knowing what she was dreaming about Liat did her best to sooth Ziva. Trying, as doctor Raviv said to keep her stress levels down.

Every now and then there was one word that was clear. "Tony" The name of her partner in America. Why was Ziva saying his name? She knew he was important to her. In their correspondence over the last couple of years all the names of members of her team were mentioned. None as much as Tony's name. Suspecting there had been going on something more than just a work relation Liat vowed to ask Ziva about it once she was better. Once the fog had cleared from her eyes and she was on her way to healing. For now the soft mumbling of "Tony" each time she finally calmed down was how Liat counted the time passing in the night.

- -

After his undercover mission was finally over they started to slowly go back to the friendship they had build in the summer that Gibbs was in Mexico. With no secrets left between them it left the way open to their hearts. As the months had passed they began to touch that delicate line between friendship and something more. The delicate balance that rule 12 prohibited them both from changing.

The night the team was split up they broke through the line drawn in the sand. Forgetting everything but them, letting their hearts not their minds speak. Ziva and Tony, not partners or work colleagues but them. That night Ziva had shown him just how deep her heart went. A long shot away from the cold emotionless assassin Abby once claimed her to be. She had been able to enter his heart. Not completely but enough to know that what he had felt for Jeanne had not been as strong as he once thought it had been. He had loved Jeanne, no doubt about it. But there had always been a slight divide between them caused by the fact that he knew she was an assignment. Things with Ziva were different. She was no assignment, nor he to her. That night, bared to her soul in his arms he saw what they could become given the chance. Seeing the way they fit perfectly together. That was why he made her promise to come back. And with the promise of someday getting the chance Tony made her promise one thing more.

"Keep in contact?" "I might not be able to. I do not know what my father has planned once I get back to Israel. I could be out on missions for days, weeks at a time. The details of where I am going or what I am doing I cannot share with you."

"I don't care about those details"

" I also fear what my father will do should he find out something is happening. He may not let me return."

"Even if it's just one line telling me you have to go away on a mission and one when you get back. I need to know you are safe Ziva" Pleading and begging with her. "Please?"

"Okay. In return you need to promise me not to try and contact me at all. No phone calls, no emails, do not respond to my messages." It had pained him to do so but he understood where she was coming from. She felt to uneasy about what her father would do should he find out her allegiance wasn't to him anymore. And so he whispered a yes into the skin of her shoulder. " I will keep in contact" she promised him

The last promise she made him and the first she seemed to have broken. It had been weeks since that night. Now stuck in his tiny little room on that damned ship he checked his email once again. Empty. Empty of the messages he hoped to receive. While Abby send him seemingly mail after mail and he kept in somewhat close contact with McGee to not go crazy nothing from Ziva. The last message he had received from her was a short email. Only 3 lines.

'The flight has gone well. No orders yet. Meeting a friend tomorrow'

That email he had not received until it had already been a week old. Having some start up trouble with his connection while out at sea. He had known before she had spoken of her fears to not reveal too much. He hoped once she settled in she'd find a way to tell him more. To talk to each other any way possible. He had typed up reply after reply to her without actually sending them, he would not go back on his promise. Until this day she still had not made any other form of contact. Hoping that she had suddenly been sent out on a mission unable to sent him even the shortest of messages. If he clung onto that hope he could silence the fear inside of him that whispered something must have happened. Ziva never broke her promises.

Picking up his pen again and starting the newest letter to Ziva kept repeating in his head. Ziva never breaks her promises. Never.

- -   

The next day was spent much like the last. Ziva still in her post coma fog was only sporadically awake.  The time she was awake Liat tried to keep her mind occupied, talking about everything and nothing. Sharing silly memories from their younger years. Hearing Ziva starting to slur her words each time before succumbing to sleep once more. Over all it was a good day. Ziva was awake, for now it was peaceful. Nurses, Liat and doctor Raviv thinking this state would last a couple of days.

- -

When the morning had come it became clear that wanting a couple of days of peace for Ziva was not in the cards. No matter how much Liat and doctor Raviv hoped. While Liat had been eating her breakfast next to Ziva. Looking over at her it was visible she was deep in her thoughts. After finishing and throwing away the waste Ziva turned her head to look at Liat.

A voice still hoarse despite all the ice chips "Liat, what happened?"

How much Liat had dreaded that question, hoping Ziva would stay in the unknown a little bit longer.

"You were in an accident. We were suppose to meet when, there was a drive by. You pushed a girl out of the way, saved her, but you were hit by the car. You were unconscious when I got near you"

Eyebrows close together Ziva was pondering the answer she got from Liat. "Why can't I feel my legs?"

In silence the two women looked at each other. The first question Liat had dreaded, the second one she had prayed she would never hear Ziva ask. Knowing what it probably meant.

"I think I better call for doctor Raviv. She can explain it better than I can. I'll be right back"

Straightened shoulders and strong steps was how Liat neared the nurses' station, finding Miriam quick enough.

"She's asking. She wants to know."

"This soon?" a deep breath "I'll inform doctor Raviv. She'll be with you shortly"

Back in Ziva's room she told Ziva that the doctor would be by as soon as she could. Sensing Ziva wanted to keep asking questions Liat took up her reading. Sending a clear message that Ziva would not be getting any answers from her.

A knock on the door, the doctor entered.

"Ziva, good to see you more alert than yesterday. Do you remember who I am?"

Nodding was enough of a reply for Liana. Everyone who was involved in the care for Ziva had hoped the woman stayed in her post coma fog a little longer. "Now I've heard you have some questions. First please answer me, how are you feeling?"

"Okay I think. I feel tightness here" gesturing vaguely at the area of her torso where the brace was. "sore" 

"Do you know how you got here?"

Again nodding "Liat told me. Accident."

"You don't remember yourself?"

"Maybe. It is foggy" Ziva replied, not sure what she actually remembered or what her mind had filled in with what Liat had told her. "Why can't I move my legs?"

The doctor then explained everything that happened the last couple of weeks. From what happened when Ziva was just brought in, to the coma and the external fixator.

"I need to see. Let me see" Raising the upper part of the bed slightly so Ziva could see Liana gently removed the sheet that now covered Ziva's midsection. A sharp breath in and eyes watering was Ziva's reaction at what she saw "It looks extreme, maybe a bit terrifying, but I promise you it's not. It's to help you heal, it will come off once your pelvis is healed enough" the doctor said as she put the sheet back and lowered Ziva down again.

"Is that why I cannot move my legs?"

"Maybe. I want to do a quick test before I explain the rest okay?" Walking to Ziva's feet and lifting the sheets Liana took a pen en held it near Ziva's right foot. "You tell me when you feel anything"

Going up first her right leg and then her left all the way to her hips and midsection as best she could. On both sides it was not until the upperparts of her hips that Ziva gave any indication of feeling.

"Listen, Ziva. What I have to explain will be hard to hear. If at any point you want me to stop you say so." She motioned Liat closer in support of her friend. "The collision caused the pelvic fracture but also caused a fracture in your vertebrae. Your back was broken. Next to the external fixator for your pelvic bone you were also fitted in a brace to keep your spine well aligned to heal. The test I just did confirmed our suspicion. The trauma to your spine was severe enough to cause paralysis. As far as we can tell now the paralysis starts at the broken vertebrae"

The tear Ziva had gotten in her eyes when seeing the external fixator but ebbed away now came back. Still strong enough not to let them fall Ziva spoke "I will not be walking out of here, am I?"

"I am sorry Ziva but no. You may get some feeling and movement back in your legs, with time and rehabilitation, but not complete load bearing and walking. For now I will let all this information sink in. If you have any questions have Miriam get me." With that the doctor left again. It was always hard to have to tell patients there lives were forever changed.

"Please, I want to be alone Liat" The request was full of sorrow.

 Wanting nothing more than to comfort her friend but also knowing that Ziva liked to retreat in on herself when pain came to close Liat kissed her forehead and whispered. "I'll be back"

Barely out of the door Liat could hear the sobs coming from the room.

Pain tore at her insides when she was alone. The tears she had been able to keep inside rolled out. For the first time in years Ziva let herself hurt. Her life had been changed. She would never walk again, run again. With the word paralysis she knew what was in store for her. Life bound to a wheelchair. Why had this happened?

- -

Having been called two day ago his daughter had apparently woken from her coma Eli had not yet had time to go down to the hospital to see her. That morning he had not thought today would be the day that morning when he got in his secretary informed him that his midday appointment with the prime minister had been moved to another day. Clearing his schedule until late afternoon. Never one to waste time he had decided that after his lunch he would go to the hospital. First stopping and demanding to speak to a doctor before he even questioned to what room he should go to visit his daughter.

Barely had the tears stopped and her body stopped shaking or the door to Ziva's room was opened. Thinking it was Liat or one of the nurses again she prepared herself to tell them she wanted to be alone. The visitor that stood in the doorway was the last one she excepted to see.

"Abba?" Relief bloomed in her chest. Her father had come. At that moment she wanted nothing more than to feel his arms wrap around her and hold her close. Telling her everything would be okay, humming one of his favorite songs in her ear to calm her down. Just as he had done when she was little, before her mother died. The comfort only a parent could give.

He barely set a step inside of her room. Without realizing she had done so Ziva had lifted her arms as much as she could. With her muscles being unused the past nearly five weeks and the pressure from her spine they did not raise far. Only her underarms raised up, silently begging Eli to close the distance between them.

"So it is true what the doctor told me" Eli said looking down at the broken form before him. Her arms falling down beside her body again but not answering him.

When he looked at her he no longer saw his daughter or a capable officer. A broken shell was all there was left. Paralyzed the doctor had told him, assuring him that it did not mean his daughter could not have a fulfilling life anymore. Just a new kind of normal. Seeing it the same way as the doctor he did not. She could no longer walk or run, the rods coming from her midsection displaying her vulnerability. Just as a wheelchair would do, a big sign to show the disgrace of a life no longer whole. He lost his sharp end of the spear. Her use to him forever nullified. All because she had forgotten the training he had given her, acting out of emotion instead of thinking rationally and going after the shooters not a bystander.

"Paralyzed. Worthless. Useless. " He muttered but he might as well have yelled it at Ziva for she heard each syllable. Felling as if they were cut into her heart. Feeling already emotionally spent she could not keep the tears from her eyes.

 The first one already rolling down her cheek as she begged again "Abba, please?"

His daughter was dead, there was nothing in this room. With that last thought he turned around and started walking out of the room, out of the hall and so the hospital.

The moment her father turned was when the last bit of Ziva seemed to break. Breath picking up, tears starting to spill out. "Abba! Please!" she yelled with everything she had in her. Not wanting him to leave, she needed him, she needed her father. Without thinking she tried to go after him. Trying to swing her upper body up with the help of her arms. Muscles not cooperating the only thing she succeeded in was half turning her body and hitting the metal around her hips. Pain shot through her no longer knowing where the pain in her heart stopped and the pain in her body began. Sobs tore through her body, heart rate picking up setting of all kinds of alarms.

Miriam rushed into her room, not knowing what had happened but seeing the distress and pain Ziva was in. Ziva did not even seem to take of Miriam being in the room. Trapped in a loop in her mind where Eli's words kept repeating themselves. Worthless, useless. Then suddenly darkness came around her, her body stilling, her mind going underwater again. Away from pain.

Tagglist: @benedettabeby@happygirl-0408@tivafanfic@loudlooks@hopeless-nostalgiac@mrsmungus@and-he-will@kmpotter4140@litningmyway@koogamy@oceangirl24@danceswithdarkspawn@irish-trish@residentdormouse@munstysmind@lovelyme12m@tonysziva@artemisscabin@television-overload@tiva2023vibes@tivancis@ncisfanatics@tonyandzivauk@tonylovesziva@tony-love-ziva@tonyandzivamakestiva-blog@missbuckynat@zivaninja@do-it-for-the-fandom@ztarlucy@take-it-on-the-run@stonetee@mackidockie@chenfordsrollisi@fairy-tales-of-yesterday

[vizthedatum]

The thing is… my usage of the phrase “narcissistic abuse” both helps people who have experienced this abuse and have understood it as something that happened to them AND it hurts people who see the term and apply it to themselves personally (people who identify with narcissism or NPD, whether diagnosed or not).

It puts me in a tough situation because I am just one person on the internet in a situation where there is no clear answer (if you search on the internet about the debate - people go on and on without resolution).

The only answer I know to be true (for myself - not like an universal truth or anything) is that this is how I have understood what has happened to me - I didn’t know for sure until last year. I spent over 32 years not identifying it as such - I didn’t realize, and I was in the dark. I knew it was emotionally abusive. I knew it was psychologically harmful. I knew that I was enabling and codependent because I was scared. I was scared all the time, in so many different ways (even during the lovebombing - I was anxiously scared of not being loved).

I am working on forgiving the people of my past. I sincerely have ALWAYS hoped that they work on healing.

But I am also working on grieving and healing and processing.

I am sorry to those I’ve hurt.

I am not a perfect person nor do I claim to be.

People will be upset no matter what I do - I have spent so much of my life trying to find the perfect dialogue option, the thing to do that will be “right” or “fair.”

I have already let down a lot of people by trying to do that.

I have been an asshole out of ignorance before.

I have been an asshole out of my suppression and/or emotional dysregulation before.

But this time?

This time, I am trying not to be an asshole to myself.

I’m letting myself try to understand who I am. I’m trying to understand how these behaviors (with the people of my past and within myself) have come to be. I have endured abuse from people of various disorders and disabilities and such (one such case is how I and some of my friends have been harmed by a close ex-friend who had a substance use disorder - I love her! I still do!!! She’s an amazing person and I am scared that one day, she will have lost in her struggle…. But she did harm us. It was abusive, and that’s the nuance that I cannot let go. And I don’t think I’m further stigmatizing people who suffer from these disorders by sharing and expressing with the limited English language of what has happened, in this way).

My own disabilities, ignorance, trauma, and disorders have hurt people too.

My trauma-processing, itself, has hopefully not been abusive but I know it has impacted my ex-partners, current partners, and friends this year.

I am still processing how I rudely blocked one of my exes during the summer because I thought she was going to hurt me and that her association to her abusive husband (who tried and succeeded in some abuse of me back in early March when I was having a prolonged meltdown) was hurting me (I mean, it was hurting me!!!! But she was also hurting). Thankfully we are friends now and still loving towards each other. But that was harmful! To me and to her and in so many ways.

I am also regretful of how I have demanded so much of my current partner’s time (at the expense of their own autonomy and health) from time to time - it’s something that I’m working on. I know they were glad to have been there for me but it was a result of my insecure attachment, trauma, and not being okay being alone dealing with my feelings.

These are human stories - including the disappointment people feel.

And I am truly not trying to generalize my experiences to demonizing any community.

I am sharing, the best I can, so that it helps me and it helps other people who can relate.

(If you can’t relate or are offended - I cannot be responsible for it. Especially when this phrase is something that I actively talk about in my own healthcare journey with my providers and it has been validated by people/providers in my life.)

[jknerd]

NIMH AU: Nicodemus

Full Name: Nicodemus Jacobs

Species: Human->IM-Human; Prototype (through experiment by NIMH)

Age: 100+

Gender: Male

Other names: Lord Nicodemus, Senator Jacobs, Prime Minister Jacobs

Occupations: War prisoner (formerly), NIMH Experiment (formerly), Senator/Prime Minister of the Bund of NIMH, Landlord, Co-Founder of the Bund of NIMH, the Prophet, an Alchemist

Residence: 1st Bund of NIMH (formerly), New Bund of NIMH (currently)

Family: Unknown

Relationships: The Great Owl/The Pope (old friend), Jonathan Brisby (close friend; co-founder of the Bund of NIMH), Jeremy Crow (friend), IM-Humans of the Bund (his people)

Likes: Jonathan’s kindness and heroism, Elizabeth Brisby’s dedication and maternal affection towards his people, Brisby children’s innocence Dislikes: His people suffering of PTSD from NIMH, Jenner’s growing lust for power, danger towards IM-Humans

Nicodemus Jacobs is a wise and mystical leader of the IM-Humans of NIMH as their senator/prime minister. He was once a. War prisoner and experiment of NIMH and a co-founder of the Bund with Jonathan Brisby. As a prototype of of IM-Humans, he is considered one of few powerful alongside the heroic Brisby, as both the prophet and an alchemist. Due to the experiment, he has prolonged lifespan/immortality and has decided to use his abilities to help the IM-Humans to settle without war or conflict with humans. When Jonathan met Elizabeth, Nicodemus was one of very few to be aware of their marriage and gave them his blessings. Later, when Jonathan expressed concern of her wellbeing and their children’s, Nicodemus offered him help by making a contract with crow spirit Jeremy and partake in alchemy to create the Stone that could protect Elizabeth and the children from potential danger.

When Jonathan was found dead in the arms of Virgin Mary’s statue, Nicodemus prayed for heavens and thanked their favor towards Jonathan’s soul, especially to Virgin Mary. He was seen reciting eulogy in Jonathan’s funeral and expressed consolation to Elizabeth. As he read Jonathan’s will, he quietly ordered Justin to silence the complaining council of IM-Humans. Since then, Nicodemus occasionally sees visions of futures or watch over the Brisby family. Year passed, he was informed the war ended between countries, but the influence of NIMH remained as the institutes want to track down the escaped IM-Humans to either recapture or exterminate them to cover their war crimes. Nicodemus find this as an opportunity to move the Bund to different location while helping Elizabeth to move the house away from the town.

At the day Brisby’s house become a moving manor and wheeled it’s way to the Bund, he witnessed through his crystal ball, preparing to welcome the family while concerned of Jenner’s growing obsession with power, fearing of the consequences if Jenner ever finds the Stone. As Elizabeth was escorted to see him, Nicodemus warmly welcomed her in person. When asked why Jonathan never told her about IM-Humans, Nicodemus explained to her about NIMH and Jonathan’s heroism. Afterward, he gave her the Stone, a ruby amulet, as he told her Jonathan has made it for her and their family’s safety, further explaining its powers. He then added another reason why her late husband didn’t tell her the existence of IM-Humans; the experiment in NIMH slowed their aging process as while she would grow old as normal human, Jonathan would remain young. Witnessing the children of Brisby family, Nicodemus recognized Timothy’s symptoms, deeming it as he is becoming just like his father Jonathan and the only way to heal his illness is when he conquered the sunlight as all Elizabeth have to do was to wait.

Explaining the moving plan, Nicodemus pointed out the only way for both sides to leave the town is either having Drago Welker distracted or drugged to sleep. When Elizabeth willingly volunteered to do so, Nicodemus accepted the offer despite Justin’s protest, noticing young captain’s feelings for her. Later, he was seen helping with his magic to move Brisby’s Moving manor and his people to leave the town. Unfortunately, Jenner immobilized the house, causing its weight to crush him to death. However, after Jenner’s death, as the moving manor was about to collapse and destroyed, the Stone around Elizabeth’s neck reacted through her courage as its magic spread wide through the range where it even revived Sullivan and Nicodemus.

At the day Elizabeth woke up, Nicodemus was seen smiling with Timothy who was running around the field in healthy condition fully healed and conquered the sunlight, as he finds out the amulet has not only revived all, but also awakened Timothy’s full immunity from sunlight, a miracle. He willingly offered to help with his magic to restore the Brisby’s Moving Manor, noticing Justin’s inner turmoil at the same time. At a night before the Brisby family’s departure, Nicodemus personally talked to Justin if he resents Jonathan for leaving him with heavy responsibility or his immortality contrasting Elizabeth’s, which Justin admitted the anger but not because of Jonathan nor his life as IM-Human. Nicodemus watched with compassion as Justin self-loathed for desiring Elizabeth and the emotional pain with the idea of her dying as human while he remains young. However, Nicodemus faked obliviousness when learning Elizabeth overheard them. Eventually when the Brisby family departed, Nicodemus watched with his crystal ball that Mrs. Brisby was no longer aging as human but becoming an IM-Human.

[aikoiya]

DP HC - Ambient Psychomagnotheric Residue Theory

I just saw a picture that really fits with my hc of Ambient Psychomagnotheric Residue.

It appears to be by @menta-art.

The fact that it looks like this suggests that something bad must've happened there... possibly multiple times... & the emotional residue in the area hadn't been purified or filtered in a long time, leading to the negative emotions caused by whatever happened to fester there & become a sort of spiritual rot.

Which is usually the reason why places without specific ghosts or spirits haunting them become haunted.

It's basically what I mean when I talk about how natural portals are necessary as they filter out used up ambient emotional & psychic energy so that things like this don't happen.

Like, you know how some places just instill you with a feeling of dread or hopelessness at the scenes of murders or great, tragic battles? It's due to a portal not having opened in the area in a long time or in the case of a huge & particularly tragic battle or multiple tragedies over a long period of time, not enough portals have opened there to fully purify the area or even keep up with the level of tragedy.

And, if this residue remains for too long, it can fester & become what the Japanese refer to as On'nen (怨念) or Malice. On'nen is a feeling of unresloved hatred, malice, grudge, & resentment that can make ordinary spirits furious & evil ones even more so.

If it remains like that longer & grows, it can further process itself until it manifests into an ever purer form known as Miasma or Shōki. Shōki being a sort of harmful, malignant spiritual pollution. It is never a good thing when this happens.

Anyway, it's extremely likely that places like Chicago, Gotham (especially places like Crime Alley & Arkham Assylum), Bludhaven, Salem, the concentration camps of the Holocaust, prisons with bloody histories, & places where frequent executions took place, are known to have a lot of really bad spots.

Lazarus Pits being in the area also tends to exacerbate the situation if said pits aren't cleaned regularly or has been purposefully corrupted such as is the case with Nanda Parbat's Lazarus Pit. It having been suffused with a complex, dark, necroturgic energy via multiple blood sacrifices & dark animantic (soul magic) spellwork in an attempt by an ancient evil necroturgist to create beings that he could control, but were more durable than living humans & corpses.

Not to mention the isomorphic blood bonding ritual that made him & his kin all-but immune to these effects. Thus allowing them to use said pits as an artificial fountain of youth & 'healing.'

The dark necroturgic & animantic curse upon the waters is supposed to steal the soul of any corpse not related to the warlock & make them his puppet while said souls are used as the fuel for the continued enchantment.

As one might guess, Ra's Al Gul is a descendant of this warlock. The Demon Head originally found it upon reading his great grandfather's journal about it.

He's always wondered; if the pit was supposed to keep members of his family alive & young, why had his great grandfather died? The truth is that prolonged exposure to the pit waters causes a warping of the mind that eventually leads to a type of insanity that reduces one to something not unlike the Joker if he were also a rabid dog.

The warlock had either realized what was happening early on & decided to have his fun while he could & accept his natural death (if with a fallback so that he could come back & continue his reign of terror) or he was reduced to little more than an animal & was put down by someone when he attacked them. In such a case, he would've entirely forgotten that he could use magic or any other form of defensive measures other than attack, attack, attack!

Or, maybe the warlock has a sickly son or daughter besides Ra's grandparent that he regularly put into the pit in order to sustain them, but the frequent use of it eventually lead to them going feral, so he had to put them down. As such, he knew to just accept death (with a back up as mentioned above).

Going back to the spiritual rot thing, most places in Gotham & Bludhaven look like this at least to a degree.

Something similar can happen in places where a lot of good things happen, but in the reverse direction. This is partially why places like churches & other sacred places often fill one with a sense of peace or calm.

If you walk into a church & you feel a fear or dread that is unrelated to your personal concerns regarding the safety of your soul due to committing sins, then it's very likely that that particular church has experienced more tragedies than joys or miracles.

Though, whether it's due to external troubles or internal corruption is something that you normally can't just know unless either you investigate or you are spiritually gifted. In such a case as being spiritually gifted occurs, some are able to better discern the nature of the negativity. Whether bad things happen here because of outside forces, thus giving the place a more sad or frustrated atmosphere, or if bad things happen here because of internal forces such as a serial murderer for a pastor, thus giving the area a much deeper sense of fear & dread with an edge of maliciousness.

If you want to see more of my Ghost hcs, go to my full Ghost Zone Masterlist.

[blakeswritingimagines]

Overhearing you want to break up

Iron man: This unexpected blow causes him to recoil in horror and confusion. He doesn't understand why this is happening, or how he could have missed the signs. He feels lost and overwhelmed, scared and insecure. His first instinct is to deny what he heard, to dismiss it as a misunderstanding or a cruel joke. But the reality sinks in and he’s hit with an overwhelming sense of heartbreak, pain, and grief. He try to keep it together, to be strong, but he’s devastated inside. He’s not sure how he'll ever recover from this

Spider-Man: If he overheard his partner was thinking of breaking up with him, he would feel hurt and heartbroken. He’s pretty sensitive, so he would definitely cry. He would try to talk to you and see if there was anything he could do to work through the problems in your relationship. If you were set on breaking up, he would have to respect your decision and give you the space you need. But it would be hard for him to let go of someone that he had invested so much time and emotion into.

Hulk: He would be heartbroken, of course. He would feel alone, lost, and unloved. Bruce would probably cry a lot and kinda have that slow-motion moment where everything around you is still fast paced, and his heart would feel like it's been torn out of his chest. He would feel like he can't see a future without you, and would desperately want to work things out. It would be a devastating experience, and would take a lot of time to heal from. He would be scared to start over and worry that he would never find someone else who makes him as happy and as loved as you did at least in the beginning.

Captain America: He would be confused and hurt, but ultimately he would want you to follow your heart and be happy. He’s open to discussing your reasons for wanting to end the relationship, but he won't try to persuade you to stay if you've made up your mind. Sometimes people grow apart and it's no one's fault, but it can still be hard to accept. He would express his feelings but try to be understanding and patient, always keeping the door open if you want to talk about it further or reconsider.

Winter Soldier: Bucky's eyes would widen as he would freeze in horror, his pupils shrinking as the realization settles in. He would be overwhelmed by a wave of conflicting emotions- anger, sadness, confusion, denial. This would leave his heart racing and his breathing heavy. He would do it all in his power to prevent the breakup- ask you why you want to break up, propose solutions to the issues, and apologize for anything that he had done wrong. Bucky would also try to understand his partner's feelings and perspective, and would be willing to compromise and work through conflict.

Black Panther: In all honesty, he would be completely devastated and heartbroken. His first reaction would be shock and disbelief, but once he came to his senses he would be devastated at the thought of losing his partner and having to start over. He would feel lost and alone, and he would probably cry, as this would be a huge loss for him. It would take some time to recover and heal, but eventually he would pick up the pieces and find a way to move on. He would always cherish the memories he had shared with his partner, but he would also try to learn from the experience.

Doctor Strange: If he overheard you talking to someone about wanting to break up with him, he would absolutely be devastated. He would feel like his world was crashing down around him. He would want to know why you wanted to break up, and try to work things out, but ultimately, he would respect your decision. He would need time to process and grieve the end of the relationship, but he wouldn't want to drag out the pain and prolong the break up process. It's always best to move on and start healing as soon as possible.

Thor: First, he would be shocked and in disbelief. After all, your relationship was perfect, and there was no sign that anything was wrong, right? He would feel as if everything you built together was suddenly threatened. He would desperately try to figure out what went wrong - what happened? What did he miss? He would feel numb and helpless, as if his life was unraveling before his eyes. He would be furious, sad, scared - so many emotions would be overwhelming him at once. The next steps would depend on the context of the break up. It's never an easy thing to go through, that's for sure.

Ant-Man: He would be shocked and heartbroken, feeling that he had failed to live up to your expectations. He would feel betrayed and angry, and would want to know why you hadn't spoken to him sooner about these issues before deciding to break up. He would ask you to reconsider and offer to work on fixing the problems in the relationship. If you were adamant about ending the relationship, he would accept your decision and leave, but he would be devastated and would need a lot of time and support to get over it.

[thecleverqueer]

Alright. Let me start unpacking my “The Wrong Jedi” arc theories. I think we all want answers. Full discretion, I don’t have them, but I’ll gladly share with you what I don’t know.

So, the first thing I’m going to discuss is the elephant in the room:

Why Barriss?

The truth is that we know next to nothing about Barriss in cannon. She has all of about 35 minutes of screen time total (including the movies). Nevertheless, her character is intriguing. From what I gather, she’s smart, brooding, emotional, painfully gay, religiously repressed and beyond that, I know very little.

It’s apparent to me that Barriss meant A LOT to Ahsoka (I say this is pretty apparent to me because Ahsoka doesn’t stop thinking about Barriss… Barriss is clearly STILL occupying space rent-free in Ahsoka’s head long after TWJ arc… even into her Fulcrum years), but their relationship isn’t fleshed out in cannon. The writers tell us that Ahsoka and Barriss are “close friends”, but we never see them hanging out or what the true nature of their relationship looks like. It puts us into a gray area really which leaves a lot of room for interpretation (which may be the point, I don’t know).

With what we’re given, we can assume one of two things in regards to the answer of “Why Barriss?” either….

1.) The writers lazily used Barriss to fall on a sword for the sole purpose of Ahsoka’s character development. This is the likely cause if we’re being honest. Ahsoka has a lot of acquaintances in The Clone Wars, but I’d say she’s close to five six people in the show: Anakin, Obi-Wan, Rex, Plo Koon, Padmé (which all get fair amounts of screen time to flesh out their stories) and Barriss (which we’re told about, but gets virtually no screen time for). Since the other characters are all well-developed and have story arcs that stretch beyond “The Wrong Jedi”, it would have to be Barriss by process of elimination. She was the only option. It wasn’t enough to simply be blamed for the crimes and banished by the council due to stupid politics. Ahsoka would have likely returned to the Jedi order after her name was cleared if it hadn’t been so personal. Instead of just a stab, it had to be a stab then a twist. Barriss twisted. So, yeah. This. This reason.

Or…

2.) There was a whole host of other things going on behind the scenes that we did not see, but that we can infer based on hints…. A blazing dumpster fire filled with drama and chaos that pushed Barriss into a corner and forced her to lash out violently.

I honestly like this option better because it allows me to be creative with theories (where the writers may have just been lazy). And, I have them so that this arc and the question of “Why Barriss?” makes sense to me.

It requires more depth for Barriss as a character… a kind of filling in the blanks. What motivated her to do what she did? For me to make sense of it, it was clearly a combination of things (three things specifically).

First, I believe that Barriss was disillusioned by the war. As a healer, Barriss saw the ugliest parts of battle: mangled men, excruciating pain, blood, sadness, peoples’ last breaths and a lot meaningless suffering and death. I imagine that Barriss would heal her battalions only to have the same men return to her seeking out her healing over and over, further prolonging their suffering and grief. She may have lost her sense of purpose as a result. What was the point to any of it? It was all so dark and disturbing. She was just a teenager likely on long deployments where she was forced to manage other peoples’ suffering endlessly. I can only imagine the PTSD that would be associated with that. I feel the disillusionment was very valid, very real. This pushed her. She mentioned this in her confession to the crimes.

Second, (and something that should absolutely be cannon) is “Barrissoka”. I don’t know how far Barriss and Ahsoka’s relationship went. It clearly went pretty far, but not far enough. The dialogue (as well as the angsty, furtive, desirous looks that they shoot one another) after the funeral of the Jedi killed in the hanger bombing suggests to me that either they confessed their feelings for one another and determined that it wouldn’t be wise to pursue anything, or that they got caught messing around and were forced to end their romantic relationship (it was Ki-Adi Mundi that caught and threatened them, make no mistake). Being cock-blocked because of weird religious beliefs sucks, but for them to be cock-blocking you from someone like Ahsoka? Someone that you got buried alive with? Someone that held your hand as you prepared to die? Someone that couldn’t bring themselves to kill you when were clearly trying to take them out? Someone that held you in their arms so that you wouldn’t freeze to death until help arrived to save you both? Someone that cared about you so much that they asked about you as soon as they came back into consciousness despite your attempts to murder them? Someone that did stupid things to cutely show off in vague attempts to impress you all of the time? Someone that smoking hot? Holy shit. I’m not going to say that I would blow anything up, but I kind of get it. I’d be pissed. This would have pushed Barriss even further.

Finally, Palpatine. I’m confident that he was manipulating the entire thing. I think he found some way to convince Barriss that it was the best course of action based on the previous two scenarios. The war will never end, and she’ll never get to be with the girl she loves. As Barriss states as they walk down the halls of the temple post-bombing, “The evidence seems clear, Ahsoka, nothing will ever change.” She was trapped. She was desperate. She was manipulatable. Palpatine convinced her that the bombing would be her out. He did this to get Ahsoka out of the way, of course. He knew that as long as Ahsoka was in the picture, Anakin would not fall to the dark side. It was imperative that he create space between Anakin, Obi-Wan and Ahsoka… which he did. As Tarkin stated, Palpatine rarely did anything without a strategy. This was one of his finest chess moves. Either way the trial went, Ahsoka would be out of the picture. One down. One to go.

So for me, that’s why Barriss. Otherwise, yeah. It was totally lazy and made zero sense. Without complete and utter despair, disillusionment and outside manipulation, it would be nothing less than character assassination.

Now, give Barriss a FUCKING redemption arc!!

[samble-moved]

RoboHomu AU (Reboot)

A hopefully better version of this initial post, now that I (mentally) have the AU further "finalized".

First off, the whole AU is based off the idea that the Madoka Magica setting is a sort of "twenty minutes into the future" setting where technology is more advanced, but nothing crazy or incomprehensible. I use this as a setting due to some canon hints, like Madoka having a holographic keyboard, and the strange architecture shown. The Puella Magi Wiki actually has an article with some speculation on when the series is set, where the Director Shinbo "described the setting as 'in the near future, or a distant future' in an interview".

Now, onto the AU.

Kyubey and Homura's Wish Effect

The whole AU is also based on Kyubey's apparent track record of intentionally twisting wishes and/or taking them as super literal, in ways no human would. He's shown time and time again to almost maliciously misinterpret wishes, ignore implications or intent of them, etc.

Homura's exact wish is two desires in one:

1) I want to re-do my meeting with Madoka

and

2) Instead of her (Madoka) protecting me, I want to become strong enough to protect her.

Obviously, there are many hypothetical ways he could have granted this. But leaning heavily into the sci-fi and futuristic elements of the series, the AU assumes that one of these possibilities is that Kyubey's potential thought process is "stronger than Madoka -> stronger than a human and/or magical girl -> becoming entirely nonhuman". This also ties into later series stuff were Homura literally comes off as cold and robotic due to the timeloops.

Kyubey doing this wouldn't be something impossible or too out there. Some canon PMMM and Magireco wishes include him granting the ability to let a bunch of children literally steal his powers/abilities, have a girl's dead boyfriend's soul literally exist consciously in her mind, turning a girl invisible, granting mind control abilities, etc. So making a human into a robot/android isn't something he'd probably see as unthinkable.

How it Works

But wouldn't Homura (and everyone else) suddenly notice a robot person?

While Kyubey has had instances of girls immediately witching out after contracting (Nagisa, Ui), I imagine he'd like to avoid this most of the time. It seems pretty inefficient for a creature who prioritizes logic above all else to want to push girls into instantly despairing when their prolonged misery and fighting witches = more energy to collect later on and overall.

I imagine magical girls have natural things they just do without consciously thinking, the same way that blinking and breathing are pretty much unconscious things humans do without any manual action or thought to it. Turning one's soul gem seems to be a thing they can just do, and I doubt they have to be 24/7 focused on their gems being in that form to keep it that way. Homura doesn't notice anything immediately (nor does anyone else) because her magic naturally makes her "look" human — it doesn't require constant focus and thought. She believes she should look human, thinks she should look human, and thus does.

But, of course, something would eventually disrupt this. In this case, the Mami mental break event. AKA, "what if Madoka shot Mami a second or two too late"?

Homura gets shot, but doesn't bleed. The illusion shatters, and she doesn't feel pain. Because she's even less human than other magical girls. She trades off (in robot form) feeling pain or having to heal and waste magic in exchange for increased mental trauma. I mean, it's one thing to think you're "not human" for supernatural abilities, it's another to have physical and real proof that you're even less of a person than everyone else.

And I mean — Homura already is pretty self hating in the series, and the other characters really do get some correct but hurtful blows on her, which likely don't help. Mami telling her she thinks like a bullied child when Homura was indeed bullied, being seen as cold and robotic, Kyubey calling her an anomaly, etc.

Not to mention the paranoia potential of Homura realizing she doesn't even have a "brain", so how's she thinking? Did Kyubey do anything or program her to act in certain ways alongside the nonhuman aspect? Null Magical Girl explored this in a different way, but I can see that being a real source of anxiety and concern for Homura. Not even considering the "can a sentient robot have a soul" type deal with her being raised Catholic.

Other Notes

The initial drafts of this had be consider maybe that Homura was always a robot, and any human memories she had pre-hospital were false. But then I realized there's much more potential in Kyubey yet again screwing up a wish, and I feel like he'd comment on it if a robot tried contracting. Let alone the "do robots even have souls to make the initial soul gem" question.

Homura, in her human appearance, has skin/the feeling of skin, but anything deeper or more extreme than a cat scratch would make it obvious that she's not biological/organic inside. Like if she was in "human form" and got her arm gashed, the machinery inside would be obvious. The illusion is really only skin deep, pretty much.

As a robot, her face is more "human" looking than anything else (based off the apparent trend of humanoid robots having expressive faces, but more obviously robotic bodies — just Google "humanoid robot" if you want to see). She does have pieces that meet to resemble her glasses, though, and doesn't like it.

I've not been very stoked with any AU art I've made, so here's an edit of (vaguely) what she'd look like (mostly the face is most accurate), and here's some concept art (if you want to call it that).

Post-reveal, Homura finds having to consciously hold up the illusion while transformed into magical girl form more taxing and annoying/distracting (akin to manual blinking), and won't do it if in a rush.

Her vision in robot form looks sort of like this.

The initial AU was inspired by kintypes the repeated comments in canon about things like Homura being cold/creepy/robotic, and her being "an anomaly", as well as immediately telling Kyoko she's not a human, and neither is Kyoko. Obviously she didn't mean it in a "literally not flesh and blood" way, but seemed like a cool idea to me. Also inspired by the "Destabilize" series by PrinceWhateverer (WARNING: ponies).

A robotic magical girl seems feasible to me, since (to my understanding) Kazumi Magica introduced the idea of a clone magical girl who also isn't/wasn't "human".

More (non-pony) audio that (at least vaguely) fits this AU is "Hello World" and "AI Dreams". The latter, at least, is what she naturally "sounds like" in robot form, and she doesn't actually need to do things like breathe or have a heart beat that would be audible to someone close by.

[redsn0w]

Asura Rot, a rare and highly malignant affliction, manifests as a progressive degenerative condition with devastating effects on the afflicted individual's psyche and physiology. It is characterized by a twisted pathophysiological phenomenon, wherein the victim undergoes a rapid transformation into a psychopathic state unless they fulfill the morbid requirement of taking the lives of a thousand individuals.

Initial Stages:

Hair Discoloration: The earliest observable symptom of Asura Rot is the discoloration of the victim's hair, transforming from its original hue to an ashen white. This striking change is believed to be a result of altered melanin production within the hair follicles, indicative of the profound disturbances occurring at a cellular level.

Cardiac Paradox: As the disease progresses, a paradoxical phenomenon manifests within the victim's cardiovascular system. Although the heart ceases its regular rhythm and exhibits no discernible beats, it continues to sustain the individual's existence. This peculiar state challenges conventional understanding of vital organ function and necessitates further investigation into the mechanisms underlying the anomaly.

Neurological Deterioration: Neurological changes become evident during the early stages of Asura Rot. Afflicted individuals display signs of escalating aggression, erratic behavior, and an insatiable craving for violence. This progressive alteration in the neural pathways disrupts cognitive processing, leading to the loss of empathy, moral reasoning, and impulse control.

Heightened Sensory Perception: Paradoxically, alongside the cognitive decline, victims experience heightened sensory perception. Their senses become acutely attuned to stimuli, enabling them to track potential victims with an uncanny precision. This enhanced sensory awareness is a disturbing aspect of the disease, serving as a catalyst for the insatiable bloodlust that afflicts them.

Enhanced Regenerative Abilities: Another remarkable aspect of Asura Rot is the rapid extreme regenerative capacity exhibited by the afflicted individuals. Wounds that would be fatal to an unaffected person heal at a highly accelerated rate, resulting in a swift recovery from injuries sustained during acts of violence. This regenerative ability is suspected to contribute to the prolonged survival of individuals suffering from this affliction.

[niquescircle]

Nique’s Thoughts

🍾—————————-🍾

On a random day, I open my twitter app and there’s a tweet by @TheHoodBotanica (one of my favs to follow) that stated, “iono who this is for but: Reverse it, Mercurial.”

Since then, this message has my mind go into deep thought. It took me a while to wrap my head about it (don’t ask me why 🙃🤣) but as I received my download to confirm the understanding.. the light bulb over my head definitely lit up.

Currently, Mercury is in retrograde. When planets are in retrograde, the planet is rotating counterclockwise (or reverse). Many people view retrograde season as a “scary” thing, but in reality, this is the season to close knots to open bows. Having car trouble? Retrograde period brought that forth so you can handle it. It may have been something that has been prolonged, and this was your push to get it done. Money issues? Retrograde periods are best for paying any debt. Pay what is owed.

There are other facts that play along, depending on the sign and degrees at play. Example: Current Transit is Mercury in Taurus (RX). This transit may bring up past debts. Test of comforting habits to see if you’ve actually sealed that knot. You may even encounter people utilizing their throat chakra and prioritize their voice by speaking on matters that they have been contemplating. Taurus is ruled by Uranus. So many of these things can be very drastic and unexpected. How this plays within your life depends on which house Taurus is on your natal chart.

Now that we’ve laid down facts about MR, back to them mf reversals.

Reversals are commonly used to return unwanted energy to the sender. It is a form of protection and a process of cleansing oneself. Reversals spells can be very intentional, (where you are stating names) or unintentional (where are you just pertaining to anyone). TO ME, reversals are great to conduct twice a month. This is used as a cleansing agent to release any energy that may have lingered, that is not of your own.

Reversal candles pillars may look very similar to this. If you notice, each pillar has different color schemes. Depending on the color that is connected to the black wax (which is very imperative to banish and remove) is the intention of the reversal. Green and black are normally seen during financial reversals. White and black are always universal or spiritually reversing. Red and black are the traditional colors and used when reversing energy to clear the roads ahead.

There are also glass printed reversal candles. Triples are my ultimate fav and go to. There are other popular versions of double reversible. The power of either all depends on your intention. Go with your own preferences.

Disclaimer: Candles and spiritual tools are not always imperative. The moving of your tongue is what holds power, especially during this time.

This is where it all ties together. Reverse that shit, mercurial. Speak on that shit. Change that narrative. Having financial issues? Speak life into your situation. Pray for healing over those mountains so they may move. Somebody talking shit? Psalms 109. Psalms 91. Isaiah 54:17. Isaiah 41:10-12. Luke 10:19. State any or all of these verses to send back the energy that was given and to protect your own. Cleansing is also a form of protection and a step of reversing. Send that shit back to the sender. Open your mouth and cast away that intruding energy. Remember, life and death is in the power of the tongue. There is ASÉ in the tongue. There is magic in the tongue. Utilize that. It will take you further than any spiritual tool. Within the Bible, there were many times that God spoke and things transpired. If we are apart of them, why could we not do the same? We have that ability to move mountains. We have that ability to walk on waters. Utilize that. In conclusion, though that it is easier to complain about your retrograde experiences.. what actions are you willing to take to improve your experience? In what measures will you put in the work for your comfort and peace? Utilize this energy to clear the energy around you. Reverse that shit. Detach from what is not of your own. You got this, and I love y’all.

-Nique 🐚

[firstblesssed]

Tire of this Charade

ffxivwrite2022: 10 - Channel

665 words | --- | Masterlist

While the Warrior of Light was well known across Eorzea for her healing prowess and magical ability, those outside of the scions were not aware of her other abilities in battle.

Woe betide the man who stands opposed to the Weapon of Light, for death will be his reward. Death for him and his kin and all that he holds dear.

Elletha was flung backwards by a particularly strong explosion, crashing into a pile of rubble with a sickening crunch. That’s not good. She thought, immediately channelling her aether through her staff to heal her wounds as fast as possible, barely managing to roll out of the way on time before the magitek armour’s arm came crashing down where she had just been.

She gritted her teeth and pointed her staff towards it, watching as red vines emerged from the ground in an attempt to hold it in place. As soon as it seemed to be stuck for a moment, she turned tail and began to run. I need distance, need time to cast need time to think need time to-

A second explosion aimed at her feet sent her flying again, rolling in the dirt and landing on her back, staff flung across the battlefield out of her reach. Using nearby rocks to pull herself up she watched the armour approach, knowing she wouldn’t have enough time to go for her weapon.

Elletha took a deep breath and placed her hand on her heart. Can you hear me? She thought, searching within herself, I could really use your help with this one.

To Elletha’s eyes, the battle ended there. She opened her eyes and the enemy had been defeated.

To the poor soldier piloting the armour that day, he watched as the savage was overtaken by a dark energy, armour forming around her, sword appearing in her hand, an ominous red glint in her eyes. This wasn’t the warrior of light he was told about, this was…

Elletha leapt at the magitek armour, slicing through one of its guns with her greatsword, watching it crumble to the floor. She stuck the sword into the side of the machine and used it to climb up, standing atop the pilot’s seat, a grin on her face.

“P-Please, have mercy, I don’t want-” The soldier’s pleas were cut off with a swing of her sword, sending blood splattering over the cockpit. She stabbed down again for good measure, not wanting to prolong his suffering. The magitek armour thrummed, now without a pilot to drive it, she jumped down from the driver’s seat and looked up at the machinery. Elletha took a couple of steps back before swinging her sword in a wide arc overhead, sending a blast towards the waiting armour.

It exploded, pieces scattering everywhere. Charred metal and flesh alike flung around the area, she threw up a shield as black as night, protecting her from the falling debris. The sword in her hand evaporated into glittering light and she made her way over to where her staff had been flung. 

“Honestly,” She said, picking up her staff, “You should call on me more often, would get yourself hurt less.”

I know. You’re just too violent for my tastes.

Elletha scoffed, returning to where she had been standing previously, the shining purple armour evaporating similarly to the sword, replaced by her robes once more. “Still, I only want to protect us. So what if I sully our reputation as a gentle soul in the process, let them know what you’re really capable of.”

I will.

“Good.” She closed her eyes once more, “I love you more than you’ll ever know.”

I know, thank you.

Elletha opened her eyes to the sight of the magitek armour in pieces on the floor. She grimaced and plucked a flower that had bloomed on her staff, placing it upon the rubble. 

With that, she turned and made her way further into the battlefield, more people needed her help after all.

[bharathomeopathytreatment]

Exploring Effective Varicocele Treatment Without Surgery: A Comprehensive Guide

Varicocele, a condition characterized by the enlargement of veins within the scrotum, affects a significant portion of men worldwide. While surgery is often recommended for severe cases, many individuals seek alternative treatments due to concerns about surgery's invasiveness and potential complications. Fortunately, several natural and homeopathic approaches offer promising outcomes for varicocele treatment without surgery.

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Before delving into treatment options, it's crucial to grasp the fundamentals of varicocele. Varicoceles develop when the valves within the veins along the spermatic cord fail to function correctly, causing blood to pool and veins to enlarge. This can lead to discomfort, pain, and even fertility issues in some cases.

Natural Remedies for Varicocele

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Homeopathic Treatment for Varicocele

Homeopathy offers a holistic approach to treating varicocele by addressing the underlying causes and restoring balance to the body's natural healing mechanisms. Homeopathic remedies are tailored to each individual's unique symptoms and constitution, making them a personalized and effective treatment option. Some commonly prescribed homeopathic medicines for varicocele.

Combining Natural and Homeopathic Approaches

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Conclusion

Varicocele treatment without surgery is the best varicocele treatment indeed possible through natural remedies and homeopathic medicine. By adopting a holistic approach that addresses diet, exercise, herbal supplements, and personalized varicocele treatment in homeopathic medicine, individuals can effectively manage varicocele symptoms, improve vein health, and enhance overall quality of life. However, it's essential to consult with a qualified healthcare provider or homeopath to develop a comprehensive treatment plan tailored to your specific needs and health status. With dedication and patience, achieving relief from varicocele without surgery is within reach.