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ithebookhoarder · 22 days

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Hello hi ! 🤗

Can you do a "bau reacts" when they are undercover in public and about to be found out so the reader just starts making out with them to pretend they are just a couple?

(BAU Headcanons) Making out Undercover

A/N: Mwahaha. Oh, this is a good prompt. Thanks for making me daydream all afternoon. Enjoy my lovelies 😉 Also, as a note, I'm writing the main BAU where I'm at watching it (season 13) plus Luke as he was requested previously 💕

Warnings: Mentions of threat, mentions of weapons, alcohol references, sexual references, implied cases / unsubs. (Let me know if I missed any)

Aaron Hotchner

We know Aaron doesn’t go undercover for most cases, so this would have to be a big case to get him into the field.

This man would be in shock. Let’s be real. He would freeze in place and try to argue for a split second until he realises what you’re trying to do and why - even if you were already together.

As soon as they’re gone though, you’d glance up and see his usual steely glare that tells you you’re in for a scolding once this is over.

However, you’d have to be blind to miss the way he lingers for a moment, holding you close for half a second longer than necessary.

“I feel I should remind you that we are in the field, and whilst it may have worked, I can’t endorse it as a tactic in future. Understood?”

“So I’m hearing that we’re leaving this off of our case report then?”

“Agreed. I don’t need to give Strauss anything else to use to go after us and the team.”

He would roll his eyes and take off after the Unsub, but you’d have to be blind to miss the way he smirks as he goes.

David Rossi

He’d be a little embarrassed but mostly quite smug about the whole thing, even if you were supposed to be undercover.

“Well, I can safely say in all my years in this field I don’t think that’s ever happened to me before.”

He’d also refuse to let you apologise for your actions afterwards either.

One, because he’s kind of flattered.

Two, because he’s been around the block a few times and knows that sometimes you have to do what it takes to solve a case or protect yourselves.

Three, you were supposed to be a couple and kissing is what couples do. He’s only sour because if anything he would have liked to be the one who kissed you.

“Relax about it, would you? I won’t tell you some of the things Gideon and I had to do back in the old days. That was before all this new paperwork and guidelines, so that’s all I’ll say on the matter.”

You make a point of remembering to ask him about that at your next night off over drinks.

Derek Morgan

Derek is always up for anything so I feel like he’d be pretty relaxed about being undercover with you, even if you weren't together romantically. He has no issue playing your pretend boyfriend for one night, and is quick to wrap his arm around you.

Which is why it would be such a surprise to him when it’s you who initiated the kiss.

Derek would freeze for like a second, but only out of shock. However, you know he wouldn’t fight you on it.

The second his brain catches up to his body he would be kissing you back, doing everything in his power to match your energy and sell this kiss.

If anything, you’re going to have to be the one to break away once the coast is clear and remind him you’re still technically in the field and that your team is probably wondering where the hell you are right now - and why you stopped responding to your comms.

“I’m just saying, if we get to do that then we need to be partnered up more often.”

“Yeah yeah, Morgan. Let’s just hope Penelope didn’t see that else we’ll never be hearing the end of it.”

Emily Prentiss

She’s been undercover plenty of times in her life and spent a whole chunk of time actually fake-married to Doyle for an op, so she’d be the most comfortable and understanding if you grabbed her for a kiss - especially if you were meant to be a fake couple.

She’d work it out pretty quickly and would respond in kind, pressing herself against you and running her hands all over you.

“Quick thinking with the kiss,” she’d whisper as she brushed a kiss against your neck.

She’d also know exactly where the Unsub is afterwards too, having kept watch in her peripheral vision.

She wouldn’t even have to break eye contact with you before she informed you, “3 o’clock. He just left out the fire exit.”

With that, she’d be off.

She also probably wouldn’t even bring it up again until you’re both back on the jet. Then she’d be smirking at you across the top of her drink and chuckling to herself.

“Normally I’d insist dinner first but given that we caught that bastard I think we’re even.”

JJ knows about going undercover and it takes a lot to rattle her. She would probably go along with the action, even if she’d stay kind of stiff for a good minute or so.

However, she’s a good agent and knows about maintaining a cover so quickly catches on when you pull her in.

She’d return the kiss, shooting glances out the corner of her eye when she thinks it might be safe to check on their target. If it doesn’t look like they’re buying it, she’ll turn things up a notch and spin you around so that she could take control.

“My gun is under my jacket. Reach for it slowly if he comes any closer,” she’d warn, but thankfully you don’t need it. Eventually they leave, distracted by something else, leaving you and JJ to recover.

After catching your breath, you both take off in the direction your target just left in. You can tell JJ is trying not to laugh about what just happened, choosing to make it funny rather than uncomfortable if you weren't together romantically.

Which means you know she’d enjoy teasing you about it in front of the others, making your cheeks burn as she announces on the jet: “For the record, even though it was a ‘cover kiss’ it was pretty good. Just saying. Maybe you should give Morgan some tips. That way he might get a girl to call him back after a first date.”

Luke Alvez

It doesn’t matter if he’s ex-army or whatever. Undercover is not really Luke’s thing and even then, he is more used to infiltrating gangs than playing house.

Basically, he would be surprised by your actions, despite being undercover together. Like, I can see his eyebrows hitting his hairline so fast, bless him. He’d look like a deer in headlights.

“Woah, sweetheart, slow your roll-“

“- Luke. Shut up and kiss me. Now.”

“I - ok.”

Just like that, he’d take control, turning and pressing you against the nearest wall in an attempt to shield you from whoever was watching. He’d also be such a gentleman about it if you weren't already together romantically, keeping his hands on your waist and pulling away the minute he’s sure the danger has passed.

Even then, he’d wait a minute before letting the two of you move from your position, just in case they come back. He’s your partner and he’s returning the favour for you keeping him safe, even if in an unsuspected manner.

“You good?”

“Luke. Shouldn’t I be asking you that? I was the one who planted myself on you.”

“Potato, po-tah-to. Are they still over there?”

“No. They just left out the back.”

“Then let’s go, partner. Let’s catch this freak.”

Penelope Garcia

If Penelope is in the field then you know she is already hella nervous and out of her element. It doesn’t matter if there was a reason she was needed for this particular assignment, she would just take that as added pressure not to let everyone down.

Which is why I’m sure you’d feel worse about planting one on her - even if it does also help distract her from worrying for a minute.

All I can imagine is her giving her trademark squeal of confusion and surprise, even if you gave her a hasty warning - and apology - about what you were going to do.

She’d be stunned at what was happening and probably takes a minute to realise she should probably try and kiss you back, or at least look less visibly startled about it.

“I feel I should point out how unfair it is that this is permitted as ‘suitable workplace behaviour’ as we’re undercover, yet my flirtatious texts with Agent Morgan are not? I will be writing a strongly worded email when we get back, telling HR they can go shove their-”

“Pen? Hey, focus here. Unsub still watching us.”

“Oh, right. Sorry! Ahem… as you were?”

Also, you know that like a day or so later, once it’s all over, she sends you an email informing you that your new username on the BAU system is now ‘smoochykins’ and she will not change it until it becomes not-funny for her… which will probably be never. After all, Morgan has been ‘Chocolate Thunder’ for the last two years and is still going strong.

Dr Spencer Reid

Spencer has been undercover before and is usually quite calm about it, even if it is faking a date or maintaining a story. Still, despite having to do your jobs, you’d hate to make him uncomfortable, knowing how he feels about any kind of physical contact - especially if you're not together.

As he says, with the amount of bacteria shared by shaking hands you’d be safer kissing … guess it was time to take it literally.

He’d be blushing like a tomato as you grab his jacket lapels and pull him close. And honestly? it’s kind of adorable. As is the way he tries to kiss you back, even if he still takes a minute to remember how to even move his body.

I’m just picturing the Lila kiss in season one and how he eased into that and how stunned / embarrassed he seemed afterwards. He would pretty much be like that, but with a fake smile on his face as he rambled in your ear.

“What was that?”

“I was covering our asses. We’re undercover, remember? We’re supposed to be a couple and couples kiss. Also, I’d thought you know, genius, that kissing and displays of public affection make people extremely uncomfortable.”

“No kidding… Morgan can never find out about this.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice. You got a deal, pretty boy. This is between us.”

Masterlist

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eldritch-thrumming · 2 months

Text

is it casual now?, pt. two

pt. one

my friends call me a loser ‘cause i’m still hanging around. i’ve heard so many rumors that i’m just a girl that you bang on your couch. i thought you thought of me better, someone you couldn’t lose. you said, “we’re not together,” so now when we kiss i have anger issues. you said, “baby, no attachments,” but we’re knee deep in the passengers seat and you’re eating me out, is it casual now?

around one in the morning, steve can’t take the tossing and turning anymore. he calls robin and she just says she’s coming over. she rides her bike all the way to steve’s house in the dark even though he tells her over and over not to do that. she just does.

he both loves and hates that she does.

steve’s on the couch in the living room again, moved back downstairs when he realized sleep wasn’t coming tonight. he’s sitting right where eddie had looked at him and rejected him. right where eddie had decided steve wasn’t worth the trouble. even in the privacy of his own mind, steve knows he’s not being exactly fair, but he can’t stop his thoughts from circling over what happened, over and over and over again, until the night is all smooth around the edges, all the good stuff rubbed away.

so that’s where robin finds him, wrapped in the navy comforter he’d dragged from his bed with the television glowing on mute. the house is dark and she just lets herself in like she always does.

“i take it the talk didn’t go so well,” her voice is light and steve can tell she’s trying not to add any inflection to the statement, trying hard so it doesn’t sound like a question.

“i don’t know, doesn’t every great love story start with someone storming out after the confession?” steve tries to make it a joke, to make it sound flippant, but his voice comes out flat. robin’s mouth quirks up a little any way and he knows it’s something like a pity laugh, but it does soothe the stabbing pain in his chest just a little.

“you wanna talk about it or you wanna let me take you to bed and big spoon the shit out of you?” robin reaches out to run her hand lightly through his hair, just once, before she lets it fall back into her lap. she’s wearing her pajamas, the wide leg of her flannel pants stuffed into her bright yellow rainboots, like she’d left the house in a hurry, couldn’t bother to change or find proper footwear.

steve sighs. “not a whole lot to talk about. i told him it would be kinda cool to maybe… date but he said he already told me he doesn’t really do that. and he’s right. i was just being dumb, i guess.”

“is that how you said it?” there’s a crease between her eyebrows now and she’s got that expression on her face that she always gets when she’s trying to solve a puzzle.

“i mean, not, like, word for word or whatever, but yeah, that’s the general gist of how it went.”

her expression shutters and her jaw sets. “right, well. he doesn’t have to be a super mega asshole about it.”

“he wasn’t,” steve tells her, earnestly. robin is eddie’s friend too and he doesn’t want this whole dumb thing ruining that too. they could all use all the friends they could get at this point, especially ones who get it, whatever it happens to be. “i promise. it was just… my mistake. he did tell me, from the beginning. i just misunderstood.”

robin’s face softens slightly. she reaches her hand out to lock her fingers with his and they sit there in the glow from the tv for a long moment, silent. “let’s go to sleep,” she yawns finally, standing from the couch. “everything will be better in the morning.”

~*~

robin is half wrong, but she’s also half right. things are better in the morning. steve doesn’t feel like his chest is going to cave in at every small wrong move and he doesn’t feel like crying every five seconds after his extensive cry sesh in the shower.

but eddie still isn’t there.

~*~

it’s been weeks since steve has seen eddie. steve’s not stupid. he’s aware that eddie’s actively avoiding him, despite the fact that steve has called the trailer multiple times trying to apologize. he’d left a confusingly vague message with wayne, one he’s sure had made no sense if it was even relayed to eddie at all. picking the kids up from hellfire at the wheelers is a newly torturous experience with the kids now waiting for him on the curb awkwardly instead of making steve wait an extra fifteen to twenty minutes on the wheeler’s gross plaid couch in their basement that perpetually smells like corn chips. everyone seems to be clearly aware that something is up. he’s sure he sees sympathy in mrs. wheeler’s eyes when she waves to him from their front door, thanking him for driving the kids home.

steve’s not exactly sure where it all went wrong. he knows now that he’d blindsided eddie; it was more than apparent now that eddie hadn’t even thought about what he was doing or how steve was feeling. steve spent hours thinking about eddie every day and it was clear now that that was not reciprocated. which is fine, he guesses, but he had thought he and eddie were friends first. they’d saved the world together after all. that tended to bond people forever, he’d assumed, just simply based on his relationships with robin and dustin and even nancy. he hadn’t really accounted for losing eddie completely. but steve was clearly fucking clueless when it came to eddie munson, so maybe he’d actually been wrong about everything all along.

he ping pongs back and forth between feelings of self-pity mixed with self flagellation and feelings of intense, white-hot anger at eddie. one minute, he’s sure this is all his fault, that he really is the dumbest person on planet earth and he definitely deserves to have people leave him constantly when he’s so fucking stupid all the time, can’t even keep his stupid fucking mouth shut and his stupid ugly feelings to himself for one time in his stupid fucking life. the next, he starts to blame eddie for what happened instead, blames him for not understanding steve at all. it’s eddie’s fault for not seeing what was right in front of his stupid fucking face. but after a couple of minutes of that, he’s back to being certain it really was his fault after all.

so after almost a month of no returned phone calls, no surprise visits at work just to say “hey” because eddie couldn’t sit around all day waiting for steve to get off his shift, no casual touches as they chat while eddie packs up his dnd gear, steve finally takes the massive fucking hint for what it is and stops calling. he begs jonathan to pick the kids up from hellfire, lying about a new shift schedule at work. he refuses to drive the kids anywhere that eddie might potentially be, even when the kids insist eddie really won’t be there. he’s trying so hard to convince himself that actually he’s the one avoiding eddie and not the other way around. he’s barely even hanging out with robin anymore, besides work. she seems to get that he needs time alone right now though. steve’s never been more grateful for a platonic soul mate.

but after this long, agonizing month of constantly rearranging his own life to help someone else avoid him, steve’s exhausted. he’s been having more nightmares than usual, ones where the people he loves all take turns dying in his arms. it’s a wednesday when he finally has the night off and he decides to treat himself with sixteen candles and a pizza. he orders his pie and fifteen minutes later he’s pulling his wallet from his pocket before answering the knock on the door.

“what do i owe you?” he asks after the door swings open. he’s got his eyes on his wallet in his hands, fingers moving over the bills folded together.

“oh, um,” a familiar voice stutters. steve’s eyes snap up. “i—“

steve feels like he can’t get any air for a minute. eddie’s just standing on his front step, staring.

steve’s throat feels dry. he has to swallow a few times before he can get any words out, but eddie beats him to it anyway.

“can we, uh. talk?” eddie looks nervous, fiddling with the rings on his fingers. steve steps out of the way, silently letting eddie pass him on his way into the house. the door swings shut and it’s the loudest sound steve’s ever heard in his life.

they stand in the small foyer with its huge ceilings and steve can feel the cold of the tiles through his thin socks. eddie makes no move to enter further into the house, so neither does he. steve shifts on his feet, crossing his arms over his chest, suddenly uncomfortable in the silence of his own home.

“i’m sorry,” steve says quietly, after a long stretch of silence that makes it clear eddie’s not actually about to speak. eddie’s eyes keep flitting around the small space, landing everywhere but steve’s face. eddie shrugs, looking over steve’s shoulder into the kitchen behind him.

“it’s not—“ eddie shakes his head, cutting himself off. steve wants desperately to hear how he’d finish that sentence. almost as desperately as he doesn’t.

“i ruined it.” steve runs his hand through his hair. “i tried calling the trailer… to apologize. left a couple messages with wayne but.” he shrugs.

eddie grunts. steve wishes he knew how to make this better. he can’t tell if the grunt means eddie got his messages or not. he’d thought he was good at deciphering eddie’s noises by now.

“look,” steve says, finally frustrated with the whole thing. “we were kind of friends before we started… hooking up or whatever. i get that you wanted something casual and that i ruined it. i get that i fucked it up and i made you uncomfortable and—i just get it, okay? you didn’t do anything wrong. you were always honest. i was just seeing what i wanted to see and i let myself believe something that wasn’t real. so. i would really like for us to be friends again. i hate this, eddie. it really sucks. i don’t like not seeing you around. i just—this sucks.”

eddie nods, swallowing thickly, but he doesn’t really seem like he’s hearing steve.

“yeah,” eddie finally agrees. “this sucks.”

steve gets the sense that eddie means more than just this whole dumb thing between them, but he’s trying not to be in the business of making assumptions about what eddie means anymore.

“i have a pizza coming,” steve sighs. “if you want to stay?” he can’t help but feel hopeful and he knows this is too much, to invite eddie to stay when they haven’t even really made up yet, but he doesn’t know how to fix this. he’s never been good at this.

eddie glances into the living room and steve’s not entirely sure what he sees or what he imagines, but he watches as eddie swallows again, eyes darting quickly to steve’s face, just once, before he gives his head a small shake. “no, i don’t—i should go. but we’ll see each other, okay, harrington?” and he says it like a question but steve thinks he knows it’s not really a question at all. steve will see eddie any time, anywhere, whenever eddie asks.

steve tries to smile before shuffling toward the door and watching eddie go.

~*~

it’s another ten minutes before his pizza even gets there and when it does, steve’s feeling even more sorry for himself than he has in the last month since he’d asked eddie out. he makes it halfway through the movie and the pizza before he starts to consider calling robin. it’s been a while since they’ve just hung out and that’s been entirely steve’s fault. she hasn’t said anything because she knows steve inside and out, but steve is really missing her right now.

he’s just about ready to pull on his shoes and pick up the phone to tell robin he’s on his way to get her when there’s a knock at the door. half of him is confused, the other half is convinced it must be robin, having sensed his desire for her company. he stands and makes his way to the door, a half smile on his face as he swings it open for the third time tonight.

“look, what happened before is not why i came here, so wait and just let me talk and then you can say whatever you want but if you don’t let me just get this out, i’m never going to say it and i… you deserve to hear it so i need to say it, for real, right now,” eddie’s practically panting as he pushes past steve.

“um okay,” steve tries to get out but eddie glares at him.

“shut up, shut up for real, okay.” eddie crouches down in the foyer of steve’s house, his head in his hands between his knees. his voice comes out a little muffled, but steve can still hear him pretty clearly. “you didn’t ruin anything. you didn’t. really. i ruined it. i ruined a really good thing.”

steve feels like his chest is being hollowed out but he bites his lip, desperate not to interrupt.

eddie groans and steve can see his fingers tense and release in his own hair. “you were so sweet, on the couch. the last time.” he says it like steve could’ve forgotten and steve feels a blush rise on his cheeks. “you… you looked so soft and gooey and hopeful and i—i fucked it up. because back when this whole thing started, it seemed like a miracle that you’d even look at me. like. you’re… you and i’m just me. what the fuck.” eddie laughs almost hysterically. steve feels his fingernails cutting into his own palms with how hard he’s trying to stay still and silent. eddie still hasn’t looked up from where he’s holding himself tight. “and it kept happening and happening and happening and i—i’ve never… i’ve never.”

“oh,” steve can’t help but breathe out in surprise.

eddie shakes his head a little, seems to forget himself and look up and then he’s just staring at steve’s face. he swallows again and steve can see his hands shake. “no, i mean, i’ve… but never… more than once. never all the time.” now that eddie’s looked steve in the eyes, he can’t seem to look away. his eyes look so huge and glassy from where he looks up at steve from his place on the floor. steve feels his heart clench. his fingertips ache. “never like that.” steve nods. “and then you didn’t leave. you didn’t run or pretend it didn’t happen. and you let me pretend it was something it wasn’t, like we weren’t… like it wasn’t… important.” steve’s brows furrow in confusion. “because i was lying. obviously. of course i was. it wasn’t casual. you’d never be casual. not for me.”

“i don’t—“ steve suddenly can’t breathe.

“wait. please.” eddie’s eyes go soft around the edges. “i fucked it up, stevie, because i was lying the whole time. and i thought you were just letting me lie because… i don’t know. i don’t know why, because i know it wasn’t casual for you either. it was all over you. and that was really, really scary.” steve falls to his knees on the foyer tiles, vaguely aware of the dull ache, before sliding closer to where eddie is crouched. he whimpers, just a little, when eddie holds out his palm, presses it to the center of steve’s chest to keep him from getting too close. “hold on, baby, i just. i have to say it, please. gimme a second, i’m just…” eddie gives his head another small shake, as if he’s trying to clear it. “i’m sorry, i guess, is what it really all comes down to. i’m sorry i let you think you weren’t important. i only realized you didn’t know that night on the couch and i… i guess i saw some plausible deniability. a way to walk away without getting, like, totally annihilated. and that’s, you know. my whole issue.” eddie swallows again, hand fisting into the fabric of steve’s shirt. “i was scared. i ran. because… because i love you, stevie. i was falling in love with you this whole time and trying to act like i wasn’t. because i was an idiot. and i couldn’t be the one to break first. but what a stupid, fucked up way to think about it, huh? i love you, man, and you deserve to hear it and feel it and have it, is really what i’m trying to say. i just love you.”

somewhere in all of that, eddie had used his grip on steve’s shirt to pull him in closer so their noses are practically touching. steve can feel the prickle of tears in his own eyes, can feel eddie’s breath on his lips.

“you love me?” even steve can hear how incredulous his own voice sounds.

eddie huffs out a laugh and steve can feel it on his skin. “yeah, dude. of course i do. how could i not?”

“dude,” steve repeats, cause like… really?

“is that all you have to say?” eddie slides his nose along steve’s, nuzzling, skin warm. steve’s eyelids go heavy.

“you left me hanging for, like, a month, bro,” steve tries to joke, but his voice sounds too breathless.

“yeah,” eddie murmurs. “i’m so sorry, baby. can i kiss you?”

and all steve can do is nod.

~*~

the next morning, steve wakes up to soft sunlight filtering in through the blinds he forgot to close last night. he feels hazy, all syrupy and warm, before he bolts upright in his bed. or tries to. because just as he’s moving, he notices the heavy presence on his right arm.

“too early,” eddie groans, shuffling naked under the covers. “turn it off.”

“turn what off? the sun?” steve smiles as he turns to spoon his equally naked body behind eddie. he drops a kiss to eddie’s bare shoulder.

“mmhmm,” eddie hums, and steve can hear the smile in it.

“hey,” steve says, before they both fall back into sleep for a few more minutes. “i love you, too, by the way.”

“oh yeah, by the way?” eddie snorts.

“better than ‘i love you, dude.’”

“oh, you think so?” eddie shifts in steve’s arms until he’s somehow gotten on top of steve, holding steve’s wrists above his head. steve can’t help but thrust his hips upwards in eddie’s direction. “yeah, okay,” eddie concedes, breathless, grinding his own hips downward. “you’re right. whatever you say, beautiful. can’t argue with that. super compelling argument.”

steve has to kiss him just to shut him up.

#steddie #is it casual now? steddie au #steddie fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie fanfic #steddie fanfiction #steddie ficlet #steddie blurb #steve x eddie #steddie au #steddie angst #i haven’t slept and also a little high rn so if there are typos don’t tell me lol

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momotorin · 1 month

Text

you cling to your papers and pens (wait until you like me again)

sana x fem!reader — angst, fluff | cw: mention of cigs, weed

it's been a rough, gruesome six months. you've locked yourself away from everyone else, only focused on your work to keep your expenses in the living range, barely eating with the empty bottles of jack daniel’s and soju lying around the dinner table properly like it's your personal bar.

“holy shit,” your friend, nayeon laughs as she sees your wrecked state. “you look like shit,” she says as she walks in, removing her white leather shoes and tucks them away neatly at the step beside the doorway. “your house looks like shit,” she sighs, taking the bottles of alcohol away from your table to your kitchen top. “everything’s shit.”

“don't need to point out the obvious,” you sighed and followed, also cleaning your mess one by one. “i just want my life back, you know?”

she just laughs as she helps you wipe down the mess on your table, “no, you want sana back.”

“well,” you sighed deeply at the memory of what you once, well, whom you still love. “i don't know. she can't leave me like this when i didn't expect that this would happen.”

nayeon was one of the people whom you ranted and cried to the moment sana went m.i.a on you. honestly, you didn't even know the reason why she did. the days before that event of her leaving, you two were happy; you cooked breakfast together, you kissed every time you wanted to, you made love in every corner, you two talked about the most random shit in the world, you rode bikes beside the river, you went on dates, rarely fought, and solved everything by communicating— like in a deep, boundless honeymoon phase.

with sana, you thought that it was never-ending. unconditional. something you could never find everywhere, even if you tried to scurry the ends of the earth for a similar feeling.

but then, on one winter night, just a few days before her birthday, she disappeared like white smoke as cold as your breaths when you cried and screamed her name in the streets of seoul.

up until now, you call her number, text her number, go to the firm she works at (well, it's unavoidable, your workplace was across the street.), text her friends (which, were also your friends and had no clue that sana also left.) hoping for a little update from her, and why she left you.

after hours of cleaning, you finally found yourself satisfied with the step of making (at least) your house a little cleaner. now, everything's clear to you; how sana left you with an empty home— an empty dinner table, an empty bed, an empty sofa, an empty heart. you went into tears remembering almost everything like it all washed, crashed, and flashed in front of you.

she left you with ghosts that you didn't know how to manage, and you're the only one left to deal with it.

does it haunt her the way it does to you? you cursed that she’d be so haunted by it and come running back.

────────────────⋆⋅🗽⋅⋆───────────────

on the other side of the world, there's 8 empty bottles of wine on a kitchen top, a woman holding a glass as she wakes up from her ‘nap’ that lasted 8 hours on her couch.

new york. there was sana in the middle of a seemingly concrete jungle, the buildings looming into her as she walks, bigger than anything else she's seen before.

but, this was her escape. she didn't even know what she would escape from.

she confided in the wine glasses, pouring both cheap and expensive wine in one night, crying and lulling herself with your voice in her messages to sleep. it didn't help that it was cold, and your embrace was the only thing that she can ever confide in. it was awful too, how the memory of you talking about new york haunts her, how she imagines you in every street, in every store, in every corner of it and how much you'd enjoy it both.

she doesn't know why she needs time if she chooses to hurt. she's so afraid of the fact that she'll break you, that she can never give what you want.

she found a small, blue velvet box in your cabinet as she wanted to steal one of your hoodies (which happens more often than not) which sent chills to her spine. you wanted to marry her.

at first, she didn't really mind as maybe you'll give it another time, or maybe it's a different ring. but you've been hinting about it ever so slightly since, and that just kept her away. she didn't even know why she was so afraid of telling you just that.

but sana's smart enough to catch on, hearing you on a call with your friend at 3am, talking about the ring, and how you'd give it to her on her birthday, basically like a double thing where you'd propose and surprise her.

on the 28th, she decided, taking one of your hoodies with her as her pairs of shoes, clothes, things, and she herself, leaves your shared home.

she sighs, putting the wineglass to a safer place, her coffee table. it doesn't help that the layout of her flat was so similar to your shared home, and she sometimes just wakes up with tears in her eyes, knowing that she had dreamt about you.

she doesn't know. what she knows is that your hurting at the same time she was hurting.

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“we're going to relocate you to new york for this project,” your boss says as he slides you a thick pile of manila folders, supposedly from the new client. “they liked your portfolio.”

“okay,” you leaned back at the cushioned chair. “what are the conditions?”

“what they've said is that you’ll be on the project for the whole duration,” your boss sighs against his own chair. “and then they’ll put you on their team of other architects in new york. they have a similar style than yours, but they'd make you the head.”

“when will i meet them?” i asked. “i mean, before i fly, there's an initial meeting, right?”

“it’s gonna be on friday,” your boss says. “read the profiles on those so that you could get a rough draft of what they want from you.”

“and surprisingly, they wanted me,” you laughed over the phone at just how ridiculous it was. you haven't had any big projects since six months ago, which was your break-up. you refused to accept, but then, this one's different. “plus, it's a two year contract. they want me there until the building stands upright.”

your friend, momo, laughs in absolute delight. “great. you'd meet me often then,” she joked, but then, you don't see why not. “and, i assure you that i've got the stuff, you know? girls, booze, and even the devil's grass— i have them.”

“god, can you calm down for a second, i'm not even there yet,” you joked back. “wait, isn't weed illegal in new york?”

“yeah, it is,” momo chuckles. “well, you've got to get your ass to other states too to live a little. that's why it's called the united states of america, not united state of new york.”

“i can't believe you can't even stay still,” you sighed over the phone. it was a classic, momo was an adventurer all on her own, so you couldn't blame her. “anyways, meet me at the airport, okay?”

“yes, sure,” she sighs over the phone too. you could just feel the eye roll from thousands of miles away. “you better get me what i've said to you.”

“of course,” you affirmed. it was a list of her favourite snacks and some other asian kitchen staples, since she does cook often. “half of my luggage is like your stuff. don't even complain if the jjapaggeti noodles are broken.”

“yeah, whatever,” momo chuckles over the phone. “just bring yourself here in one piece. you already have a place?”

“yup,” you breathe, remembering how much you were looking forward to that house. it was supposed to be your home after you've proposed to sana. “i, um, kept it for a while.”

“alright,” momo replied. “i gotta go.”

you then smiled, “okay, see you.”

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momo fetches you from the airport with a silly little sign that read: “WELCOME TO NEW YORK Y/N!” then, she happily shows you around the new york city like a tourist before going home.

“is this it?” momo asks, looking up through her window to see if she was in the right apartment complex.

you nodded and said, “yes, this is it.” you smiled as you got off the car, helping momo unload the luggage. you took out a big bag and a small plastic bag out of your luggage, and gave it to momo who was already smiling with joy. “snacks.”

“you're my bestest friend ever.” she says, quite sarcastically as she loads the stuff back to the backseats of her sedan. “you really sure that you can't spend the night out?”

“i need to deal with the jetlag first,” you explained as you closed your luggage. “plus, i have a meeting tomorrow. i need to deal with that first.”

“okay,” momo smiles and hugs you. “just give me a call whenever you need someone, okay?”

“yes, yes,” you smiled and hugged her back. “you go home now.”

“yup,” she says, going back to the driver's seat. “good night, y/n!”

you smiled and waved at her until she disappeared from the street, as now you're left with your heavy luggage and your stuffed backpack. you get your keycard from your wallet and slowly went up the stairs, having a breath of relief seeing the entrance to go up the complex.

it had an elevator, luckily, it was working, and you pushed the button to the 4th floor. your door was to the left, a huge studio unit facing the street. although it isn't that busy, you really liked it as there were trees, and it was downtown.

god, you wished that sana could live in this beauty with you. the apartment, by your design, had taken inspiration from the 60s, mid century modern at it's very best. you turn on the lights to see the furniture still covered with what you left it.

you quickly remove it to take a seat on the sofa. you couldn't believe just how much it feels this big. it was like someone was meant to be beside you, but now you're left all by yourself.

the big windows show just what's outside. another complex, another window, weirdly, your neighbor's windows were open. you didn't have your glasses on, so you didn't really mind, but there was a woman who held a glass of wine, her hair tied into a bun as she read a book. it was a quiet life, and you were sure of it.

you take out something from your backpack, a little journal for your sketches. you draw the lines of your window, and draw the woman just across you. you don't know her, but you smile at the sight of her just turning pages and drinking her wine. you finished your sketch, smiling, and you passed out on the same sofa.

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sana, after a while of drinking wine and reading, takes a look across the road. it's the first time she sees the lights open from the neighbor's window, and she sees just how big the windows were compared to hers. must've been great to live there as she sees the furniture. it looks like a damn museum in soho.

she doesn't miss the sight of a person, still wrapped up in their most uncomfortable clothes, a brown, long trench coat, dress pants, and a dress shirt; passed out on the sofa. that's how she remembers you sleeping when you've had a bad, excruciating day from your work, and she chuckles at it. she must've been so drunk to think that it was you, so she gets her eyeglasses.

“fuck.” she cursed. she rubs her eyes in disbelief, maybe she's going crazy that now you haunt her. “fuck, this can't be.” she slaps herself, trying to make sense of it all as she hurriedly closes her windows shut.

she knows you've had a couple of apartment complexes in new york way before she ghosted you. she knows that you own several here— one in the upper west, one in soho, and this one, all of it being rented. she was going crazy and filled her wineglass again, trying to relieve her veins.

she couldn't sleep that night without trying to look at the other side. seeing you sleep like that, so uncomfortable and busy. her heart aches as she still knows just how much your forehead creases like that, at just how much she knows your heart sleeps heavy too. she wants to hold you like she always does, and wants you to let it all out on her.

sana cries herself to sleep that night.

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you wake up to the bright sunlight seeping into the corners of your home. you even forgot to take out the lights before you slept so uncomfortably on the sofa. you looked at your watch, seeing that it was already 9 AM, just an hour before your meeting, so you hurriedly stood up, cursing as you pulled down the blinds of the window to have some privacy before you left. you didn't miss how the woman across you had shut her windows down even if she was letting it all open at night. weird.

you then chuckled at the thought and got rid of your other clothes to take a bath and hurriedly made yourself presentable for the meeting.

you just thanked god for the subway system, and how fast you can run. you arrived at the meeting room 10 AM, on the dot, and you immediately took out your laptop to present.

it went well, and now you're reassigned into a team on the 14th floor, working on the same project as you. it's a two year contract with them, so you made a promise to yourself that you'll not slack off about it. well, it's just that you can't. it's a big project and you need to design both interior and exterior.

the same night, since it was a weekend, you decided to get a couple of drinks from the deli just right at the corner of your street. you were already dressed comfortably, and you're now looking at the selection of alcohol in the back of the deli. you can't deny that you've been drinking more now than ever, even when you were partying. you sigh as you get two bottles of smirnoff mule, a staple since you've been spending time here and not finding cheaper-than-water soju.

you went to the cashier and saw a woman getting in, hair falling down to her shoulders, wearing a comfortable pair of slides, with a pair of black rimmed round glasses and one of your favorite hoodies. wait. what?

you look at her again, her back facing you. that mclaren formula one hoodie. it was plain in the front, just having the team’s logo, and it had a huge print of the car at the back. it was a gift from her since she knows just how much you like formula one.

“that'll be $5.28.” the cashier reminds you. “anything else?”

“a pack of marlboro reds too, please.” you smiled, and you heard the woman, whom you think was sana, clear her throat. she knows you've been trying to come clean, and since the four years you've been together, you haven't touched any type of cigarette. she can't bear the feeling that pangs in her chest, knowing that you'll relapse because of her.

“that'll be $22.28.” the cashier says. damn, that expensive? you thought in your head. it was just a fake buy, yeah, you'd put it, but you'll leave it rotting. you become sick at the smell of tobacco in your system.

“have a great night!” you greet as you went outside the deli, waiting for the woman to come out. you don't plan to confront her, but you do plan to get something out of her. you don't care if she'll nag at you, or hit you, or ignore you. you just want her to know you're here and you've found her.

you put a stick of cigarette between your lips, and you pull out your lighter (you keep it as a fidget toy, and you recently put some fluid on it.) you spark it as you saw, at the corner of your eye, sana leaving the deli to go to your street too.

you took a sickly puff out as she passes by, and she coughs loudly.

“what? have a problem with it?” you confronted her. “it’s not like it's your first time seeing me like this, minatozaki.”

you quickly disposed of the cigarette. you hated it already, and it was no use. she stopped in her tracks, hearing her last name come out of your mouth.

“just stop running away.” you chuckled to yourself. “you already know i can never get mad at you.”

“i live at number 14, 4th floor, number 229, the door's always open.” you shouted as she continues walking. you didn't care if you just exposed your room number, or your literal address to everyone. not that they’d care. what's important is that sana does. “i want my hoodie back!”

“well fuck you!” she shouts back, and from that, you can see her tears run from her face. “it's mine now!”

she runs to her apartment, and you observed, it was the one just across yours. you waited until you knew which floor she was on. you knew it the moment the second unit of the third floor opened their lights, and it was the one directly in your direction. you laugh at the realization that she was the woman whom you were drawing the first night you were here.

“god, i can't believe she's still this stubborn.” you say to yourself as you keep smiling your way to your apartment. thank god you have a hundred papers for creating your blueprints, and you lay one out on your drawing table to write ‘give me my hoodie back!’ in big letters, enough for sana to see the next morning when she opens her windows.

days passed. you haven't been opening your window since she still isn't giving you back your hoodie.

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“damn, it's dark in here,” momo laughs as she puts down her chinese takeout, seeing your apartment this dim in the afternoon. the only one with a light was your work table, which had most of your blueprints. “i know you hate overhead lighting but don't fuck your eyes up more.”

“yes, i know,” you sigh as you open the lights. “i'm just trying to cut down on the costs.”

“you own the damn building,” momo scoffed as she opened her box. “plus, you have more money than you think.”

“please don't get me to try weed again.” you joked as you also took a box, opening it to smell the most scrumptious chow fan you've ever smelled. “this is enough.”

“yeah, it's great, probably the greatest one around here,” momo smiles as she takes another bite of her food. “sana lives just right across from you then?”

you just nodded as you went to get some water from your fridge. “she just said fuck you.”

“i mean, she would,” momo joked. “but like, that's kinda asshole-y of her to just ignore you.”

“she ghosted me, of course she would ignore me,” you laughed. “no one gets friendly with people they've ghosted.”

“why didn't you like, pull her to you?” momo asked. “you know. like ones in dramas?”

“nothing would ever come out of it either.” you sighed. “plus, i didn't have the guts too. maybe i was so upset that i really just wanted my hoodie back. don't even try to sound me out. i know that you'll say you kissed mina the moment you reconcile. but she didn't ghost you!”

“okay, yes, that's right, but still.” momo holds you by the shoulders to calm you down. “get your girl back.”

“i can't,” you laughed. “i'm so busy that i didn't even remember that i got dumped. honestly, at how busy i am, i might even forget that she lives just right across from me. i haven't called her number, i haven't texted her for days. the last text i sent her was i told her that my detergent was still the same.”

“why the hell would she want to know that?” momo laughs.

“dunno,” you pouted. “she has my hoodie, might as well make it smell like me.”

────────────────⋆⋅🗽⋅⋆───────────────

“i fucking hate that she hasn't even changed one bit,” sana sobs as she confides in her friend's side. “it’s so annoying.”

sana remembers the way you screamed. the way you faked buying cigarettes and taking one stick that you immediately threw as she turned her back against you. the way you called her last name. the way your voice cracked in pain. the way you drew your note with a silly character. it annoys her that you keep on staying on her mind. she was supposed to forget you.

“i'm,” she sobs more, nursing a bottle of some alcohol she got offered with. “so annoyed that i still want her.”

“then get her back,” mina laughs as she hugs sana. “honestly, she'd understand it. like she always would.”

“i don't wanna hurt her anymore,” sana sobs as she takes another sip. “i never deserved her.”

“she pursued you back then,” mina remembered, rubbing her hand across sana's arm to calm her down. “what makes you think that you don't deserve her when she literally wanted you?”

“i just can't.”

“do you still want her?” mina asked.

“yes,” sana chuckles through her tears. “a little too much.”

“then pursue her,” mina whispered. “try to win her back.”

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sana kept that in mind. that night, she wanted to go home by herself, and mina let her do so, even if she was too concerned. sana got too annoying and mina just dropped her off by the subway instead.

sana stops by the corner deli to try and see you.

you were at the deli to grab a little snack, and you opened the door to go outside but you almost hit someone, “shit, look where you're going!” your stuff fell to the ground and you heard the person chuckle.

“sorry,” you looked up at the person. “i shouldn't have.”

you realized it was sana. she wasn't standing upright, her outfit looked like it was chilly, and her eyes were almost closing. “sana,” you held her by the waist, trying to get her upright. you pull her close to you as she pulls you by the waist too, her head leaning to your neck. “goddamnit.”

“don't say that,” sana laughs against your skin. “but i get it though.” she slurred her speech. it was probably the copious amount of alcohol she consumed.

“i swear if you ever vomit on me i won’t meet you again.” you've seen it all. she vomited on you the first night you went out and she was too drunk. “i'm serious.”

“i know,” she whined as she hugged you again. “just take me home. i don't do that anymore, baby.”

“stop,” you tried to unclasp her from you, but her hold on you was tight. “i can't walk properly.”

“you do,” she looks down and sees that your steps were completely fine. how the hell is she still this conscious? “please.”

“we're gonna trip.” you chuckled. “get off of me first.”

she did get off of you, but she continued pouting, and you see her tears pooling around her lower eyelids.

“okay,” you took off your jacket and let her wear it, then you carried her with your arms, which took her by surprise and she immediately wrapped her arms around your neck. “don’t think that i'm still head over heels for you,” you warned. “i'm doing this because your feet are fucking swollen.” you were right. she was wearing those heels with such a steep form, and it was inches away from the ground too. you're surprised that she haven't even removed it yet.

she just nods, and her tears fall down. she can't believe that you're not mad. that you're not fuming. that you haven't even refused her yet. you don't hate her.

you take her to her apartment, lay her down on the couch, and you search for a glass to pour some water in. “here,” you handed it to her. “sober up.”

“thanks.” she smiles and wipes her tears.

“don't even,” you said. it hurts her to hear that you're almost monotonous. “where's my hoodie?”

“i’ll return it to you,” sana says as she rests her head on the couch, surrendering her whole drunk body in it. “it's in the wash basket. don't even bother to find it. i promise.”

it was an excuse for you to get her a blanket, which you got from her bed. you saw that her eyes were already closed, and you're even more surprised that she's actually already sleeping. you laid the blanket on her legs, and she pulled it up to consume her whole body with it.

you don't know why, but you watched her sleep. you watched if her eyes also tear up, or if she mumbles your name. you heard it and sana full on sobs, you saw at just how much her hand tightens around the edge of the blanket, how her breath heaved as she mumbled your name.

you don't understand. why does she seem more hurt than you? you're the one she left, and not the other way around. did that drunk curse work that well for her to miss you this much?

you find yourself crying. you just can't bear it so you left, but you didn't miss to tuck her hair behind her ear, and you didn't miss to wipe her tears by the tip of your thumb. you just couldn't bear seeing her this hurt.

────────────────⋆⋅🗽⋅⋆───────────────

sana grunts as she sits up from the couch, feeling her head throbbing against her skull. she was warm, having the jacket on and a blanket. she saw that she had water and hangover pills just on the table where her night lamp was placed. well, fuck.

she looks at her phone hurriedly, wanting to see if she got a new message or a new call from you. she opened her windows and saw a new note saying: drink your meds!

she forgot for a moment that you were there with her last night, that's why she has your black puffer jacket, and that there's a note on the table too. it was your number, and you wrote: “whenever you're ready.”

she just couldn't believe how calm you were. she just can't bring herself to admit that you don't hate her.

her eyes run a tear once more. she doesn't even know why she's this hurt. she chose to leave, didn't she?

────────────────⋆⋅🗽⋅⋆───────────────

sana conquered the fear of texting you first. but after telling that the number she texted with is her active number, you just left her on read.

her day passes by like that, looking at her phone every once in 30 minutes, staring at her phone the whole lunch break, and her heart races everytime she gets a notification, hoping that it was from you.

honestly, she doesn't know what she'd say to you. maybe you were busy, or maybe you just chose to ignore her to pay back what she did. (which, honestly, isn't that bad.)

she pouts, staring at the text. still on read.

sana: are you free this weekend?

she asks. in over a record time, you read it and you reply.

y/n: yeah, why?

sana: i was wishing if we could talk over dinner and hopefully i could give your jacket and hoodie back.

y/n: don't bother to return the hoodie.

sana: why?

y/n: i changed my mind. plus, you technically bought it and you just handed it to me as a gift, right?

sana: yes, but what about your jacket?

y/n: i have three of those. that one's already wearing off and it has holes anyways.

you were honest. you do have three of it in similar styles, sana knows of it, doesn't know why, and you don't even know why.

sana: but what about dinner?

y/n: i can cook 🙂

sana pouts, but she knows you're playing with her to get something out.

sana: please. let me treat you out.

y/n: you don't need to. why?

sana: yes, i don't need to, but i want to.

y/n: then?

sana: i’d talk with you.

y/n: aren't we technically talking now?

sana: look, i just want to spend time with you.

y/n: minatozaki, this is leading to nothing.

sana: please let me treat you out to dinner.

y/n: we're going in circles. why?

sana: i need you to hear me out.

y/n: okay.

sana: 6pm. pontios.

y/n: okay. anything else you need to say?

sana: your jacket doesn't have holes.

y/n: just keep it.

sana smiles. it was such a you thing to do, letting her get away with your jackets in her closet. it's the best thing that keeps her warm, wrapped around the similar woody vanilla scent of your perfume.

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the weekend comes quickly, and you were so exhausted to finish checking and doing what seems like thousands of blueprints in a span of a day. you need to clear your schedule for saturday and sunday to finally get some rest. of course, to also finally meet sana.

it's the time where you'd actually find why she left. why she made you cry. why she moved to new york.

you sighed as you put on your best outfit, and went out just before 6pm. you went to the restaurant to see her already waiting for you in a table closed off from the windows, in a more intimate area of it. you looked around and saw the interior, and you guessed that it's sana's favourite. it had the same mid-century feel to it, but it was more of a diner, and it was very bright with the presence of fluorescent light bulbs.

“did you wait long?” you asked as you looked at your watch as you sat down on the sofa right in front of her.

“not at all,” she flashes you a tight lipped smile. “i arrived a couple of minutes ago.”

“good,” you said as the waiter makes their way to your table. “should we order now?”

“yeah, go on,” she says, handing you a menu. “pick anything you like.”

you just hummed and you flipped the menu to every page. apparently, it was an all day breakfast restaurant. most of the meals only consist of either coffee, pancakes, sausages, fried chicken, bacon, and eggs.

“i’d get the chicken platter, please,” you dictated. “plus a can of coke.”

“i’d get the same.” sana closes her menu as well and hands it over to the waiter with a smile.

“so,” you sighed as you adjusted yourself, leaning back on the cushions of your seat. “what am i even here for, minatozaki?”

“do you really want me to make it quick?” she sighs.

“i thought you were ready?” you scoffed.

“i know what to say, yes,” she said. her eyebrows were already meeting in the middle of her forehead slightly. “where do you want me to start?”

“where do you want to start?” you chuckled.

sana knew you were toying with her with your little repetitive questions. “since you wanna play that way,” sana sighs. “i left because i knew you were gonna propose to me.”

your jaw immediately drops to the floor the moment you heard her, but you tried to pull it back before flies could come in.

sana smiles at your reaction. “i didn't want to reject you, so i chose to leave instead. i thought there was nothing else i could do. it was either to reject you and break your heart like that; or break your heart by leaving and ghosting you.”

“okay,” you breathed and collected your thoughts. “why didn't you tell me that?”

“i'm not a party pooper, y/n,” she joked as the food arrived at your table already. “i didn't want to ruin your surprise either.”

“so you surprised me instead,” you joked, eating a slice from your pancakes. “nice one there, minatozaki.”

she sighs under her breath. it was hard for her to process just how much she hates being called by her last name from you. it used to be so sweet. now it's just plain, boring, and hurtful— like a dull knife piercing right through her stupid little heart.

“what i was trying to say,” you said as you gulped on the cola. “is that why didn't you tell me the day before? there was plenty of time for me to blow up my surprise.”

“yes, but it's your surprise,” she sighs as she takes a bite from her chicken. “it’s foolish if i find it out first when i am the one who'll take the surprise, right?”

you smiled at her, “yes, but what made you think that i’ll look at you and love you differently if you say no?”

“because you were so sure of it.” she says, looking at you right in the eyes. “you don't want your expectations to be broken, and that's the first thing i knew about you when we met. i just couldn't let it happen.”

“i just couldn't let myself see you cry because of me.” she sighs, interlocking her hands together as a relief. you see the tears pool around her eyes as she looks down on her untouched pair of fried chicken and waffles.

“okay.” you just took a bite out of your food once more, ignoring the overwhelming feeling in your chest. “is that all of it?”

she just nodded as she sniffled.

“eat up,” you smiled, quite foolishly and teasingly. “you said you wanted to take me out to dinner, right? it ain't fair if i'm the only one actually having dinner.”

sana chuckles to herself. this was how you usually are, trying to ignore the feelings that come from everything.

“but you made me cry still,” you laughed to yourself as you spoke. “you made me drink, you made me lonely, you made me coop myself up at home when i should be celebrating my birthday, made me think so much where did i go wrong when i remembered that i kissed you to sleep. you made me question everything i did from the start, sana. and at some point, you even made me doubt you.”

you're quite surprised that you're not shedding a single tear. maybe it was the relief of getting the point across to the person that you really want to talk with, and getting the answers you wanted for such a long time.

sana realized that you're awfully kind. it hurts for her to hear that there are nights you spent drinking on your own, thinking about what you could have done to get her back.

you hand her your handkerchief, but you can't bring yourself to dry her tears just yet.

she gladly takes it, and she smiles, finally calming down from the heavy feeling. it soothes her that you never lost yourself, even if she left you clueless.

“i'm sorry, y/n.” sana sighed deeply as she wiped her tears down with the soft cotton of your hanky.

you then chuckled again, “what for? are you leaving me again?”

“no,” sana pouts. “i'm just sorry for everything that hap-”

“it's all in the past,” you smiled again. sana missed seeing that, but she felt that something was lacking. “and your food is getting cold.”

“oh, right,” sana then picks up her cutlery and gets into action. she must've been hungry too. “why are you in new york, though?”

“do you want a stupid answer or a good answer?”

“both.”

“i'm tired of finding girls in seoul,” you joked. “and my, supposed to be, our apartment was rotting so i had to stay. plus, i got a two year contract for building a 35-storey office in manhattan. although it's technically a refurbishment project, since it has so many floors it'll probably take some time.”

“oh, that's why…” she then ate away what she was about to say. she knows you were joking from your first statement, but she can't help but think about it.

“i was too busy finishing my job before i can even party, don't worry about that,” you said. “anyways, why new york though?”

“no one knows me here,” sana says as she chews on her syrup drizzled waffles. “although, i did meet an old friend, no one knows me here.”

“hm, okay,” you just nodded. “and the old friend?”

“mina.” she smiles.

“wait, sorry? mina?”

“yeah!” she says, quite amused at the situation. “i think i told you before that i had a friend that went to the states and grew up here too.”

“hm, yeah you did,” you muffled as you were still eating. “do you know her girlfriend? momo?”

“yeah,” sana nodded. “wait. you know momo?”

you just nodded. “she's a friend from college who moved here immediately after getting a good hire from a famous firm.”

“oh, so you know momo.” she laughed to herself. she just can't believe how small the world is, and she ends up always having to meet you. it just seems to her that you'll always find her.

“do you have like,” you looked at her again as you took a sip from the cola. “a job?”

“oh, yeah,” she smiles. “i work at a company and it's just in soho,” she explains. “what about you?”

“i'm in midtown manhattan,” you said. “it's quite terrifying to get lost in the subways, though.”

“you still work late?”

you just nodded, “of course. i can't avoid it.”

“hm,” sana thinks. you work late. you rarely open the windows. you work at the most exhausting part of new york. she clears her throat. “um, do you have a, like…” she hesitates. it's quite the dumb question to ask if you ghosted someone. “girlfriend or a fling?”

“honestly?” you asked in a sharp tone that gets to her ears so well it makes her heart go faster. “i would love to.” you teased. “but, i'm too busy with work, still very stuck up with this one person and that one person happens to be just in front of me.”

sana just watched you eat away the final bites from your food as you smiled to yourself. she just can't figure it out. you were straightforward back then, and it's the same case up until now.

“what if i'm not here?”

“i'm still going to be very busy though,” you said. “so my thoughts really can't escape beyond what i do for work, and you.”

sana, unbelievably so, blushed. “oh.”

“it's kinda scary and amusing, actually,” you said, reflecting on the past few days, weeks, and months. “it's like i'm just thinking of you. when i'm not thinking about how i’d do my work and evaluate my team’s work, i think about if you already had lunch, or if you got late at work, or if you had your morning coffee— you know, trivial stuff like that which i usually ask you.”

“really?” she then beams, the situation making her overly happy. “i, um,” she calms herself down and breathes deep before saying, “think of that too. if you're pissed off because you don't have the right pencil to draw with, or if you got your favorite coffee, what did you eat for breakfast, what do you wanna eat for lunch… stuff like that fills my mind all the time.”

you just nodded. you don't know what to feel about it. you don't even know what to feel about anything that's happening right now. it seems like you really needed her in front of you to explain what she did, but a part of you thinks that this isn't enough. a part of you was still doubtful of it, but a part of you wants to just engulf her in your hug, knowing just how much she hid from you.

she had every right to be scared. you just don't know how she had the heart to leave.

“when i left,” sana sits back on the couch again, sighing deeply. “i don't want you to pity me or anything, honestly i want you to be super angry at me,” she joked. “i hesitated. i didn't like imagining how you'd lose yourself, get drunk, find another girl,” she emits a weary breath. “but then, i flew here and lived by myself as i promised, ignored your calls, your texts— just to find myself still listening to your voice at night, looking at the photos of us to relive those moments that i had with you. i was so stupid.”

“you are,” you said. “but i can't be mad at you.”

“why?”

“i just can't deny the fact that i have a lot of love in my heart for you that it consumes any other feeling that i have in me,” you explained. “i’m fine with it now since you admitted to yourself. i'm sorry too if i got too ahead, sana.”

“you don't need to be.” she smiles. “you were just expecting the obvious.”

“why did you get scared of it, though?”

“i know that you'll treat me right, but there are so many doubts that i had,” she pondered. “but it's mostly on my part. i didn't like seeing myself not being able to commit to you. i hated that at some point, i’ll be the one to leave, so i left before anything worse can happen.”

“okay,” you sighed. “what do you wanna do now?”

sana softly laughs, “ah, well,” she looks down on her food again. “i honestly want to win you back.”

“i'm not a trophy, sana,” you joked. “but then, if that's what you want,” you looked at her, that feeling of spark rising within you as she let her honey brown eyes meet yours. “i’d let you do it. it's not going to be easy though.”

“i know,” sana murmured. “and i'm gonna try my very best.”

you laughed, seeing the determination that rises in her— cheeks flushed, eyes sparkly, just like how you remembered her. “good luck.”

────────────────⋆⋅🗽⋅⋆───────────────

that night was the first time you slept well without alcohol, and sana, as you saw from across the window, slept on the couch comfortably as she watched her favorite tv show. (you bet that she finished the series already, and that she's only rewatching it.)

────────────────⋆⋅🗽⋅⋆───────────────

the morning comes and someone comes knocking at your door, calling your full government name like you're getting arrested for tax fraud.

“yeah, wait,” you rub your eyes, trying to get all the morning dust out of the way. you opened to see sana, smiling like she was the sun. “oh, hi.”

“hello,” she sing-songed. “i just wanted to drop by,” she handed you over a bag. you wondered, one of your eyebrows lifting as you held it. “breakfast. your favorite,” she chuckled as she pats down the stray hair from your sleep. “eat well.”

“nice,” you chuckled, prying the bag open. “have you eaten already?”

“uh, yeah,” she said, nervously palming the back of her neck. “i'm about to go now, actually.”

“are you sure? this is a lot,” you smiled, seeing the big container of your favorite breakfast. “you know i don't eat that much.”

“you know what,” sana laughs. “just tell me if you wanna eat with me.”

“i have extra plates, come on,” you respond, letting her in your apartment. she was resisting at first, stepping away from the door, but then, you showed her the best puppy eyes that she'll always fall for, and she's trapped when you said, “please.”

“okay,” she smiles and comes inside your apartment, leaving her shoes by the step before going in. “looks warm here.”

“hm,” you nodded, taking out the big container out of the bag. “you really cooked, huh.” you saw that it really was your favourite breakfast, one with fried rice, eggs, and spam. it was a simple meal you always shared with her in your apartment before you went to work.

you move to pull out a chair for her, and you get the cutlery from your kitchen. “do you want coffee?”

“yeah, that'll be nice,” she smiles. she doesn't know how weird it feels how you easily go into the routine that you had when you two were still together. it was always like this, your back facing her as you were busy in the kitchen, making sure that her breakfast is great, and that she'll start her day as great as possible. “can i have it i-”

“iced, three pumps of cream, and vanilla.” you recite as you run your espresso machine. “i still don't know how you like your coffee so sweet.”

“well, thanks for remembering that,” sana laughs, glad to know that you still question the amount of sugar to coffee ratio on her drink. “how about you? still a shot of espresso, a pump of creamer, and iced?”

you nodded, funnily so. you didn't expect that you've spent that much time with sana that she knows you, down to your littlest, mundane, and absurd routines.

you smiled at her as you made way to the table, sitting across her like you usually do. for a while, you forget that sana ghosted you for months.

────────────────⋆⋅🗽⋅⋆───────────────

to say that you were sana's love of her life was an understatement. seeing you again, like this, eating your favorite breakfast after not reaching out to you for months makes her throat and eyes burn. it's ridiculous of her to let you live alone, to let you be deprived of her love.

it continues, you two fall back into a simple routine.

sana spends the mornings with breakfast she makes at the crack of dawn and you two share, you fix yourself as sana waits, and you get unexpectedly early at your office.

during the afternoons, you have coffee that she bought in hand, something she's been weirdly doing every now and then, even dropping by to your office. during the night, she fetches you, saying that: “it's gonna be a waste of energy if you go home by the subway, we're literally living across each other.”

occasionally, and during the weekends, sana, if time permits, takes you to restaurants, bars, or parks to ease your mind. new york was huge, and you're surprised she knows it down to a t, and to it's hidden spots.

────────────────⋆⋅🗽⋅⋆───────────────

she knows that the schedule of yours was very hectic. she dreads that more as you spend less time with her, since recently as you held the ground-breaking for the site.

“it was a mini project that they didn't tell me about,” you munched on the churros she bought you before you sat down on one of the steps facing the vast, winding hudson river. “and you know, it made me much busier than i am.”

“you need a raise,” sana laughs. “and 20 leaves.”

“they're giving me a raise,” you laugh as well, finally easing up. “so yeah, but i still became more busy.”

sana sighs as she stares off at the sight. the skyline of new york fades away as the sun starts to set, and the lights of the buildings slowly turn on.

it was a moment. it reminded you that you needed time, whether productive or not.

you just needed time.

“sana,” you then looked at her. “what do you think about coming back together?”

“what do you mean?” sana nervously laughs. she didn't expect for you to say it sooner. it's only been two months since you started reconciling.

“us,” your eyes stared at her honey brown ones like they're the only things you've ever known. “look, i just-”

“i realized that i can’t go a day without you,” you sighed in relief as you then held both of her hands, saying your truth. “i figured that i was thinking too ahead, and i didn't give you time and i ruined that for us. i'm sorry-”

sana then pulls you into a warm, loving hug, “you don't need to be. i'm the one who left, right?”

“yeah, bu-”

“i'm the one who left,” she repeats, trying to sink those words into your head. “and i think i'm not trying my best getting you back just yet.”

“but you are,” you whispered. “i just want you to call me yours again, please.”

“god,” sana lowly chuckled as she ran a hand behind your back, comforting you. “you don't know how much i've been waiting for this, my love.”

you sinked your head into her neck, trying to suppress your feelings as you heard that one phrase you've wanted to hear from her for months. “i love you.”

“i love you too,” sana then kisses your forehead gently as you close your eyes, savoring this little moment in time with her. “i hope i could prove that every day.”

“you don't need to,” you held her hand again and kissed it. “just stay by my side. it'll be enough.”

sana held your cheek with her hand, soft against the surface of it, as she brushed her thumb below your eyelid, something she always does like a little habit. “okay,” she comes closer to meet her forehead with yours, and locks your lips as you two share a longing, electrifying kiss. she smiles, lips inward as you pull away. “i waited for that, too.”

“well, that's just fair.” you then held her hand as she wrapped her arm on your shoulders, letting you lean onto her. you two stared off at the view, just admiring the warmth of the sunset before it gets cold during the night.

“and i’ll always wait,” sana whispered. “i won't get tired.”

you then smiled, now holding the hand that was on your shoulder as you stared off the river in a comforting silence. “as long as you're with me,” you then looked at her. “i won't mind taking time and waiting.”

#twice imagines #twice fluff #twice angst #sana imagines #sana fluff #sana angst

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forever-rogue · 1 year

Note

may i request one where joel finds comfort hugging reader in a bone crushing hug after a long day 👉👈

do with it what you will fluff angst spice ill take them allll i just want this man to crush me and id welcome it hehe

AN | One bone-crushing hug with a side of angst and softness coming right up 🥰

Pairing | Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings | Language

Word Count | 2k

Masterlist | Joel, Main

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You looked at the watch on your wrist and sighed softly. The watch didn't work. It hadn't for a long time.

But he'd given it to you and that made it special. You'd never taken it off, even when the battery died. He insisted he'd get you a new watch or even a new battery at the very least. You never took him up on the offer; it didn't matter to you whether or not ticked away as long as you had it.

Normally it served as a bit of reassurance. Today it served as a reminder that he was gone. Not gone, but gone for long enough that you were starting to get worried. Not that you would ever admit that to anyone. You didn't want to appear weak, but you also didn't want to cause anyone else to worry.

But this wasn't like Joel; he was never gone for more than two or three days at most.

It had been over a week.

And not knowing what happened to your lover was brutal.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"Worryin' isn't going to solve anything."

"Well, not worrying isn't solving anything either," you threw a hard look at Tommy and shrugged before going back to your relentless pacing, "so if I have the option, I'll choose worrying."

"It's probably the bad weather," he mused, and you were sure he was trying to convince himself of that as much as you, "could be a lot of things. Jumping to the worst possible conclusion isn't…"

"I love your eternal optimism," you stood in front of the windows and looked towards the gate as you often did, "but I'd rather expect the worst and be pleasantly surprised when he comes back. Versus the alternative."

The younger Miller brother nodded before letting out a long sigh, "I know."

"I'm scared, Tommy. It was supposed to be a simple supply run," stopping suddenly, you turned to him, eyes glittering with unscheduled tears, "what if he doesn't come back? It shouldn't have taken this long. I don't know what I'll do. I-I…"

He remained but hugged you tightly, trying to soak in all the worry and doubt you had. If it was an option, he would have taken all the worry and fear from you and dealt with it himself. If only.

"Why don't you go home for now and get some rest?" he suggested softly, wiping away the tears that had rolled down your cheeks, "I'll stay here. I'll let you know if anything changes."

"Tommy-"

"Go and be with the kids," he whispered as your heart panged. You knew Ellie was just as worried about you, but she was the glue holding you all together right now, "they need you too."

"Okay," you nodded, "thank you."

"It'll be okay," he promised and you desperately wanted to hang onto his hope. All you could do was give him a small nod.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

By the time you got home, you were spent and felt like you could use a year long nap. You closed the door behind out and let out a long sigh, letting go of everything you'd been holding back as you kicked your shoes off.

You heard Ellie's voice in the living accompanied by a small set of giggles. Your heart softened at the sound and your heart yearned to be with them. You shred your coat before making your way over to them, Ellie on the floor on a big fluffy blanket as she played with the little girl. Your little girl; but really they were both your girls.

The two of them stopped as soon as they heard you, Ellie offering you a small smile and Emma babbling and cooing happily. There had never been anyone you'd loved more than these two…and Joel.

You walked over to them and sat down, pressing a kiss to the top of Ellie's head before pulling the baby into your lap. She squirmed as she tried to hug onto you, "she's been really talkative today. As much as a one-year-old can be."

"I wonder who she gets that from," she teased, causing the girl to grin sheepishly.

"Definitely not Joel."

"Definitely not Joel," you agreed. You sat back against the couch let out a long breath as you pulled up your legs and laid Emma against them, giving her tickles which only caused her to laugh harder.

"She looks like him," Ellie stroked her rosy, chubby cheek as you nodded. She had the same big, brown eyes and roguish hair, her expression often appearing as though she was deep in thought, "he's going to be okay, you know."

"Ellie…"

"I mean it," she insisted in that steadfast way she often did, "he'd never leave you or her o-or…"

"You," you finished for her, "we're all family, Ellie Bean."

"Yeah," she sat next to you and leaned her head on your shoulder, "he'll come back. Nothing would stop him."

"You're right," and god, you hoped she and Tommy were right, "he'll be home soon."

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Several more agonizing days passed without any word, and the nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach felt like it was going to eat you alive. Even Ellie, happy, optimistic Ellie, was started to show signs of worry. She’d never admit it, but she didn’t have to; it was written all over your face. You were just glad that Emma was still a baby and wouldn’t remember any of this.

That thought alone had led you down a rabbit hole of worry. What if he didn’t come back? What if she never got to see her father again? What if she didn’t remember him? How were you supposed to raise and take care of Ellie and Emma all on your own?

You groaned as you startled awake for what was the umpteenth night in a row. You hadn’t been sleeping much; every time you managed to fall deep enough into slumber, the dreams - nightmares - came again and caused you to wake up. Most of the time you ended up giving up on sleep and would sit in the kitchen, nursing a mug of tea that grew cold as the sun came up.

A book was currently in front of you, one you’d read a hundred times before, but you weren’t actually taking anything in. Your mind kept wandering, wandering, wandering. You were so lost in thought and so zoned out at the same time that you almost missed the pounding on the door. You almost ran to the door when you snapped back into reality, trying to keep the noise from waking the girls up.

When you got to the door, you wretched it open without even looking to see who it was. It was Tommy, wild-eyed and looking somewhere between excited and nervous.

“Come,” he didn’t hesitate to grab your arm as he pulled you out of the door, “come.”

“What’s going on?” you looked at him, confused but going along with him. You noticed that the front gate was closing and a group of people were nearby. The hairs on your arms stood up as a shiver ran down your spine, “Tommy?”

The crowd slowly parted and you felt like your heart felt like it stopped in your chest. Part of you wondered if you were dreaming, but you felt Tommy squeeze your shoulder, “go.”

Your feet were carrying you, faster and faster until the rest of the crowd dissipated and you found yourself face to face with him.

“Joel,” you hadn’t even realized you were crying, weren’t consciously aware of anything else but him.

You didn’t get a chance to say anything else before he threw his arms around you, wrapping into the tightest, most bone-crushing hug imaginable. You didn’t care; you wouldn’t have cared if his touch bruised you black and blue. It was him, he was home, he was here.

You held him back just as fiercely, and you could physically feel the tension in his body ease as he let himself relax into your familiar touch. You weren’t even sure how long he you, how long you clung onto his body before you finally parted.

He took your face in his hands, his touch calloused but tender as he studied, almost as if he too didn’t believe you were real. He looked worse for the wear, but nothing unmanageable, nothing that would take him from you. And then he smiled, the same wonderful, lovely smile that made his dimple appear and the corners of his eyes crinkle, “sweet, beautiful abejita. I heard you were already planning my funeral.”

A moment of silence passed before you burst into laughter, tears - this time of joy and happiness - running down your face. Joel brushed them all away before kissing you softly. There was no way to properly put into words how much you’d missed this, him. When you pulled back you felt his arms wrap around your waist, “even if you didn’t come back, I’d find you and kill you myself if you thought you were going to get away with leaving me with two monsters to raise on my own.”

“Fuck, I’ve missed you,” you buried your face into his chest and breathed him in. It didn’t matter that he was sweaty and dirty; him being here was enough, “you and that mouth and everything else about you.”

“I’ve missed you too,” you looped your arms around his neck and held onto him tightly, hugging him as you rocked back and forth, “I love you.”

“Terribly,” he agreed in the way that he was prone to doing, “I’ll always come back home to my girls. Even if I have to come crawling back.”

“Joel!” the small voice came from behind you. You turned to find Ellie there, holding a warmly bundled up Emma in her arms. Word got around fast, “you’re back.”

He let out a sigh of relief at the sight of his girls, dropping to his knees in front of them as he looked them both over. The baby, miraculously, was still sleeping, but he stroked her cheek before repeating the gesture on Ellie. She swallowed thickly, tears unshed in her eyes as he hugged the two of them, gently, delicately.

“I missed you both,” he promised, not that there had ever been a question on that. Ellie nodded, at a loss for words, “what, kid? No smart comment from you?”

“No,” she shook her head, a few tears falling down her cheeks, “I missed you. I’m glad you’re home, Joel.”

“Me too,” he promised, turning back to find you watching them with nothing but reverent fondness in your eyes, as you smiled at him, “me too.”

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x fem!reader #joel miller x you #joel miller imagine #joel miller one shot #pedro pascal #tlou #tlou hbo

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kaivenom · 3 months

Text

Not you again

Summary: you are a hunter and went to solve a case on your own. Everything points that a shapeshifter it's in town, but after earing a familiar and obnoxious voice behind you, it's obvious that you aren't the only hunter on the case.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x reader

Warnings: kissing, sexual tension, not admiting feelings, enemies to lovers, bad language.

Masterlist

You were talking with some witnesses when you ear a voice behind you, a voice you know very well because how much it annoys you. Slowly, you turn around to greet them.

"Hi, boys." you try to sound as calm and nice as you can be.

"Son of a bitch, not you again." that's the kind of answer you expected to hear from him.

"Dean Winchester, i suppose that now i am a man then... well, then i have a bigger dick than you."

"You don't know how big my dick is." his condescending look made you even more furious with that marked jaw and deep eyes.

"I don't plan to figure it out."

"You wished you could do that."

"Hi guys, i don't know much more are you planning to do this but we have something in mind." Sam is always the voice of reason.

"Ok, thanks Sam, i am going to finish the interview with my witnesses."

"Oh no, you're not going to do that alone."

"Excuse me?"

"Maybe it's better to do this together now that we are here." Sam proposed.

"NO!!" Dean and you answered.

At the end, you three were obligated to work together because to open cases of presumed FBI agents in one town would be strange and very difficult to explain. Everything pointed to a shapeshifter but with this type of creatures it's very hard to keep track on their forms. While investigating you try to keep yourself away from Dean and his stupid perfect face.

You have no issue on accepting that you had an attraction on Dean but it's overshadowed by the fact that he has a horrible personality that makes you crazy and he always interferes with your cases.

He passed the next couples of days annoying you, following you everywhere he can and was the most insufferable person in all the world.

Finally you tracked the shapeshifter and went to the hideout with Sam while Dean waited outside. When you entered, you two saw a lot of teeth, blood and skin, that it's too much.

"There are two." said Sam and he was right, you needed to get out fast and warn Dean.

That night the three of you ended up sleeping with a silver knife. At some point of the night, you hear a knock on you door, you were prepared to kill but it was only Dean. You let the door open so he can enter, he was shirtless with a towel around his waist. He was incredibly sexy like that but you couldn't let your guard down, not tonight not with him.

"I see you didn't expected my visit."

"Of course not, and not like that, you killed the shapeshifter?"

"No."

"Then why are you here with just a towel?" this situation started to get you arroused and weirded out.

"Because i like it, because i can, because i know you would like it." he started to get close to you.

"Oh, i will never want that."

"Oh, you will... just like i want it too." your faces are now really close.

"I don't..." and his lips touched yours, at this time you couldn't hide your reaction anymore.

The thing was that all that situation didn't fit, something it's strange about it so you obliged yourself to distance from Dean. He looked at you seductively and let the towel get down. Definetly something isn't right, you took your phone and when you put the camera the eyes of Dean glowed, it was a shapeshifter.

He runned to trap you but you got to catch the sliver knife before and killed him, her, whatever she was. You went really fast to Dean's door, the closest to yours and knocked frenetically.

"Sam, please, finally i am having a good time with..." when he saw your face, the colour on his went away.

You where bathed in blood, that must scare someone but not Dean. That's when you looked inside the room and saw someone who looked exactly like you but was on black lingerie, your eyes go back to Dean again and realize that he was just on his underwear with a growing erection.

"That's not me."

"i..,you... me." for the first time ever, you saw Dean without a word to say.

The other shapeshifter noticed what was happening and was starting an attack, just like the other one did with you. In just a couple of minutes you killed it, Dean was not a big help on this, he was to stunned to talk.

"I...I can explain," he started to say but you interrupted him.

"i want a shower, i am covered in blood, i cant until i am clean."

That it's true, in part, you need to get out and think about what you saw. Dean Winchester, the one who always keeps bothering everytime he can, that doesn't seem to even tolerate your pressence was almost having sex with you...

The next morning you ignored him, Sam was weirded out about everything because he went for a snack in the middle of the night, you didn't say nothing except that you killed the shapeshifters. After leaving the motel, when you were about to leave, Dean set you aside.

"I want to explain."

"Ok." you almost felt your heart on your throat.

"She was very persuasive."

"She was me, and you hate me so i don't know how can she be persuasive."

"Are you stupid?"

"That it's a really weird way to explain things"

"Son of a bitch, i like you, damm it."

"What, How?"

"You are so smart and all day in your books, you are a little like Sam. Did you see how i treat Sam?" suddently memories of Dean trying to get Sam's attention passed thru your brain.

"Really?"

"Oh, don't say it like that, i didn't know how else i could get the attention of someone so intelligent."

"Well, i've been thinking for years that you hated me when i find you incredible atracttive, your personality crashed all posibility of thinking about us getting together and now..." at this point you were almost yelling at him, "when last night that shapeshifter entered my room with your aspect i couldn't resist...

You couldn't finish the question because he was already merging your lips together in a heated kiss. His hands carresing your cheeks and then slowly going down to your waist. His strenght made you start to walk back and end up pressed against a wall. The passion it's clearly visible and probably the frustation from last night, you could't control yourself and let out some moans which only made him groan and pressed your bodies together even more, searching for some kind of friction. His hands started go down to your ass, the situation it's getting too hot, you two were too horny and frustated but you need him to take a little revenge.

"Stop there, tiger." you searched for his hands and remove it from your ass.

"But... i thought we were solving things and maybe..." he looked like a lost puppy.

"Yes, and we will have that moment but you need to pay for all the annoying stuff you did."

"Then maybe you can come to the bunker and i can start to apologize."

"I take your word." you kiss his cheek and walk to the Impala.

#supernatural #supernatural imagine #supernatural x reader #spn #spn x reader #spn imagine #dean winchester #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x reader #misha collins

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beomboomboom · 4 months

Text

Cockroach

genre: fluff, established relationship

pairing: idol!Joshua x reader

summary: Joshua hates cockroaches. Never in a million years would he ever be able to kill one, but thank goodness he has you to take care of that.

warnings: mentions of cockroaches, a little bit of swearing

note: Definitely not me projecting from all the times I have been absolutely terrified when I would spot cockroaches in my room 👀. I hope you enjoy reading <33

When stuck in a crisis, Joshua considers himself to be very calm and quick to problem-solve.

But when that crisis is a cockroach, all those previous statements are thrown out the window. Joshua is not calm in any way, and he is way too panicked to even have the capacity to think of a solution at that point.

"WAHHH-,"Joshua screeches as he practically leaps out of his seat and frantically runs to the other side of the room,"AHHH ITS COMING CLOSER WHAT THE HECK, GET AWAY YOU FILTHY CREATURE."

Hearing all the commotion, you quickly enter the living room to be met with a sight that makes you laugh and want to protect your boyfriend at the same time. Joshua is cowering behind a beanbag, his eyes wide with fear and hatred, as he looks over to the floor where a big brown cockroach is crawling towards him.

"SAVEMESAVEME," Joshua screams, pleading, once he catches sight of your figure in the room. Abandoning his beanbag that he was using as a barrier, he quickly rushes to your side and hides behind you, using you as a barrier instead.

"Honey, it's just a cockroach, everything will be fine. I'll kill it okay?" you reassure Joshua as you take hold of the heaviest thing closest to you—a SEVENTEEN album.

"OH YOU ARE NOT GOING TO KILL A COCKROACH WITH THAT-,"Joshua hisses while snatching the album out of your hands.

"WELL THEN WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO-."you begin to reply before getting interrupted by Joshua's screams of terror.

"'-AHHH ITS RIGHT THERE," Joshua screeches from behind as he wraps his arms around your waist tightly and digs his head into your shoulder, scared out of his mind.

"WHERE?! WHERE IS "THERE","you yell back in reply, Joshua's panic rubbing off on you. Frantically, you grab hold of the first thing you can get your hands on—a random box of crayons, as you try and locate the cockroach.

"THERE," Joshua screams again while pointing in the direction of the cockroach, which is now moving faster than ever before, probably feeling panicked because of Joshua's screams.

Smashing the box of crayons on top of the cockroach firmly, a moment of fearful silence falls upon you and Joshua.

"I-Is it dead?"Joshua questions nervously while looking over your shoulder, finally breaking the silence.

Lifting the crayon box slowly, both you and Joshua let out a sigh of relief the second you both spot the dead and smushed cockroach on the crayon box.

Defeated after the whole ordeal, Joshua flops onto his back. "You're a lifesaver, I thought I was going to die for a moment there."

You let out a laugh before rolling your eyes, "a tiny cockroach won't kill you."

Muttering a small "sure feels like it though" in reply, Joshua then gently tugs your body down so that you can lay your head on his chest.

As your head lays comfortably on Joshua's chest, Joshua can't help but notice how you and him laying together feels so warm and cozy. Sitting up, Joshua leans over your figure and presses a soft kiss onto your forehead. "I love you," he whispers with a gentle smile.

Smiling softly, you quickly reciprocate the kiss, but on the lips rather than forehead. "I love you too," you say with a laugh.

Just as Joshua is about to reconnect his lips with yours again, you gently pull away. "Joshua...I think you forgot I still have the dead cockroach in my hands"

"OH FUCK NO-, GET THAT AWAY FROM ME"

#seventeen fanfic #seventeen fluff #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #seventeen x reader #joshua fanfic #joshua x reader #joshua imagines #joshua x you #joshua x y/n #joshua hong #hong joshua x reader #joshua fluff #joshua scenarios

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faeryarchives · 1 year

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Hug Me!

gn!reader x malleus draconia

your lover wants to drown you with their affection but doesn't know how, until you beat them to it.

note: ok so it's been a while since i last wrote something i am sorry if it is a bit rusty 😔 and i tried writing in a 2nd point of view let me know what you guys think abt it ^^

Walking down the trail back to the Ramshackle Dorm feels nostalgic after being stuck in the training camp for a while. Finally going back to your own dorm after a week of chaos is such a great feeling. Stretching your arms up in the air, you let the warm breeze welcome you back home.

"Never thought there would be a day that I would miss our precious dorm." While you seemed to be happy being back, Grim on the other hand is on a whole new level of joy, feeling free from everything - eyes sparkling and the fire of his ears start to go brighter.

"My sweet soft bed! No more errands from those professors and students finally I can sleep in peace."

"Grim wait- and there he goes." Before saying another word, the cat monster immediately speed towards their dorm leaving you alone on the trail. '

Silly Grim, I'll make sure that he gets his favorite tuna later.'

The prefect continue walking down the trail enjoying the scenery - birds chirping, tree leaves dancing in the air and a certain dorm leader standing in front of their garden.

Such a wonderful sight brought a smile to your face as you quietly walked behind the person - trying to give them a scare by covering their eyes but then unexpectedly your surprised (eye color) eyes met excited bright green ones.

"Child of man, you are back. You were gone for some time." Malleus muttered, his hands holding your hands together gently as if anytime you are going away for another long time. Seeing how your lover looks like a sad dragon, you find your hand patting his head and gave him a kiss on his hand.

"I missed you too, Mal! Let me tell you what happened during the camp, I wished you were there." The two of you sat together under the tree near the garden, Malleus laying comfortably on your lap as you continuously run your fingers through his hair and horns. From morning till noon, the ravenette listen to all of your story with an unknowing pout on his face.

'It's been a while since I last saw you.' Being away from you for some time made the dragon yearn for your affection and wants to drown you with his own love. 'But you look so happy talking about other humans.'

Hearing stories of you having fun without him makes him a little sad. A sigh escaped his lips making you sneak a glance at Malleus' face. Noticing how his mood changed, you poke his forehead with a finger and let out a giggle when he somehow looked confused with your actions.

"(Nickname) why did you stop?" He sat up and look at you curiously. You crossed your arms in front of your chest and puff your cheeks out - looking the other way with a huff.

"Aren't you forgetting something? I am really hurt." Although you said it as a joke, there are so many thoughts running to the Draconia's mind at the moment. Did you get offended in some way? Or did you read his mind? Did you not like his hair condition?

A laugh cut his brainstorming in a halt and all of his problems were solved the moment you opened your arms wide with a grin.

"You goofy dragon. Hug me!"

Ah, it was so easy. How can he be so foolish? Malleus chuckled at his own dilemma, looking directly to your eyes before engulfing you into a warm hug - burying his head to your neck and let out a soft sigh as if he is in the safest place in this wonderland.

"I am really back home, Mal."

"Welcome home, my love."

and little did they know something will happened in the future *ahem* chapter 7 *ahem* anyways i can't wait for diasomnia's ssr dorm cards like SEBEK'S CARD IS SAUR PRETTY IM SO GLAD I GOT HIM 🥹

as always i hope u guys enjoyed and hopefully i am not shadowbanned?? if i got shadowban i will reblog this over andd over again i need everyone to know abt my malleus fluff before angst agenda 👹

recent fics: adore you & so this is heartache

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland headcanons #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland imagines #twisted wonderland scenarios #malleus draconia x reader #twst malleus #malleus draconia #a.diasomnia #faeryarchives #disney twst #twst #twst scenarios #twst wonderland #malleus x reader #twisted wonderland malleus

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thisisawonderfulusername · 1 year

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only you

cavill!sherlock holmes x pregnant!reader

requested by: anon

summary: after becoming pregnant, you notice that sherlock has been distancing himself. he finally returns home after at least a month of being gone.

warnings: pregnancy, mention of a dead body but nothing graphic, if there's anything you see let me know

word count: 2k

a/n: thank you so much for this request! i apologize for how long it took to write, but i enjoyed it! i don't think i was able to fit absolutely everything but i hope you like it either way.

everything was perfect in the beginning. at least, that's how it felt.

when you first met sherlock, it was at the scene of a case you were working on. you admit, it was a bit suspicious of you to be digging around in a dead man's pockets, but you were there for the same business as him. or at least similar.

"who are you?" you jump at the new voice in the room, obviously not expecting anyone else to waltz in while you were doing your investigation.

you rise from your crouched position as you pull a note from the dead man's pocket, turning to see the intruder.

my, was he handsome.

clearing your throat, you fold your hands together, encasing the paper. "i could ask you the same."

he sighs, "sherlock holmes."

a soft gasp passes your lips. sherlock holmes, the well renowned detective.

"i ask again, who are you?" he questions.

"y/n l/n." you inform him, "it's a pleasure to meet you, mr holmes."

his eyebrows raises as he looks to the corpse on the floor. "may i ask why you were searching a dead man's body?"

"oh," you had almost forgotten your business here, being in his presence. you glance down at the body, "i'm investigating a case. my search has led me here."

he seemed intrigued by the new information, nodding his head. "the case of his murder?"

"well, a missing person's case. but it seems it has become more than that." you motion towards the floor.

"i happen to be investigating his murder." he tells you, "i believe our cases may have crossed."

"so it seems." you hum.

he glances around the room for a second, clearly thinking. "perhaps we can share our information."

you never would've expected that case to lead to a long partnership, bringing your minds together to solve even the toughest of cases.

"another case solved, mr holmes." you smile at the man beside you.

"couldn't have done it without you, miss l/n," he responds, causing you to chuckle.

and perhaps a blooming romance.

yes, throughout the months of running around with him, you may have grown to have some feelings.

it was something different. you had met plenty of men. your parents had introduced you to some, telling you how wonderful they were and how you should settle down soon before nobody would want you. of course, nobody would want a woman too old to have a child.

but with each man who courted you, you realized that in your mind, you were comparing them all to sherlock.

sherlock, who was the kindest gentleman you'd ever met. the person you felt most comfortable with on any day. the man who had moved in with you after a mere three cases, leaving two-twenty-one b baker street as a place for bringing evidence together to create conclusions.

in your mind, he was perfect. but out of reach.

little did you know, it wasn't quite as far away as you suspected.

"ha!" you step back as you look at the strings that connected on the wall in front of you. "oh my- sherlock!" you call for him.

he rushes in from the other room, eyes wide. "what? did something happen?"

"i figured it out!" you squeal, clapping your hands together, "i solved it!"

"you-" he quickly moves forward to look at all the connections, eyes darting all around. a moment later, he looks back to you, "you did!"

it's almost natural how you gravitate towards each other, "my word, you are just-" he can barely form words, and without thinking…

he kisses you. it seems as if it's something that happens everyday, with the way your hand moves to rest on his shoulder without any thought.

when he pulls away, you're staring into each other's eyes, amazed by what just happened.

"well, that could've happened much sooner," you breathe out, sharing a smile with him.

after your relationship blossomed, it was approximately a year before he proposed.

and not too long after, you found yourself to be pregnant. when you told sherlock, he was elated at first.

the two of you were turning a new page in your story, beginning a new chapter.

but after a month or so, the excitement from him began to dwindle. he grew distant, and it seemed to you like he was hesitant to even look in your direction.

with time, he was rarely coming home, staying in the flat that he used to call home- to you, it seemed like that was slowly a returning case.

one day, as you were heading towards town to run some errands, you heard a strange whining sound near the bushes along the sidewalk.

when you went to investigate, pushing the leaves to the side, you saw a puppy. a bundle of shaggy, light brown fur.

"oh, sweety." you frown, hesitantly reaching out for it. once it allows you to get closer, you manage to pick it up out of the bushes. it was much heavier than you expected, but you managed to hold him. "why are you out here all alone? have you got any owners?"

you searched for a tag but to no avail. "it seems not. i suppose i'll take you home with me then, how does that sound? we can keep each other company."

you smile. no part of you ever expected having a dog, but here you are, carrying one back up the stairs to your home.

"i think a bath will do you good," your nose scrunches as you open the door, having to hold the dog close to yourself and smelling the odor that came from him.

thus began a friendship filled with love and loyalty.

part of you wondered what sherlock would think, but he hadn't been home in at least a month, only dropping in to grab a new round of clothes every once in a while.

your hand runs across cato's back while his head rests in your lap. every few minutes, you'll lift your hand to turn the page of the book you've been reading, but only seconds later it's back on his fur.

it's been a relaxing evening, as you've had no errands to run for the day, and until dinner you haven't got anything to do.

usually, this time would be spent by sherlock's side. whether it be having a cup of tea or going out to solve a crime, it would be with him.

it seems you haven't had that since you found that you were pregnant. since your belly grew bigger, since he stopped lingering in your presence.

a knock at the door has the dog's head raising, and you look towards the door. as he jumps off the couch, you place a bookmark on your page and push up from your cushioned seat.

when you open the door, you're greeted with the sight of the young sister of sherlock's and her new beau.

"enola!" you smile, opening the door further, "it's wonderful to see you again. and tewkesbury, a pleasure as always."

"it's wonderful to see you again, you look wonderful," enola says as they enter your home, noticing the dog a few moments later, "and who's this?"

you look down to him, his tail beginning to wag as tewkesbury reaches a hand out for him to sniff. "this is cato." you inform, "i found him on the street about a month ago. i didn't expect for him to get so big in such little time."

they both smile and enola watches as tewkesbury scratches the dog's ear. "how does sherlock feel about him?" she asks.

a small frown tries to tug your lips down but you quickly disguise it. "i'm not sure," you sigh, "he hasn't been home to meet him."

tewkesbury looks away from the dog when you say that, eyebrows furrowing together. "he hasn't? why not?"

all words are lost as you shrug, not knowing yourself why he hasn't been around.

"i'll go speak with him," she states, beginning to move back to the door.

"no, enola," you grab her hand and she stares at you in utter confusion. "there's no need. i'm sure he'll be back soon."

her hand drops from yours as she sighs. "if he fails to return, i will get him myself." you promise.

she nods, "just- tell me when he does."

you muster up a smile, "of course. would you like any tea?" you change the topic.

"we were actually on our way to the market," tewkesbury informs you, "we were just passing by to say hello."

you nod, "well, don't let me hold you up. enjoy your day."

enola's arm loops through his and you feel a tug at your heart as you open the door for them, "remember, tell me when sherlock comes to his senses." she points a finger at you before they leave.

you sigh when you close the door, thinking of the times you and sherlock had their kind of relationship. young and naive.

you look down at cato, who was unaware of your feelings, his tail wagging happily.

"oh, darling." you sigh, patting his head, "what will i do?"

you hum softly, moving throughout the kitchen to grab various ingredients for dinner.

it was a peaceful moment until you heard the door open, followed by a growl in the living room.

you froze, carefully placing what you held on the counter and grabbing for a knife. had you forgotten to lock the door?

when you peak around the corner of the entryway that leads out of the kitchen, you see what caused the distress of your dog- your husband, home for the first time in who knows how long. it upset you that the thought of him being home didn't cross your mind before someone breaking in.

the confusion on his face is evident when he turns his head and sees you. "what is a dog doing in our home?"

"i took him in." you state matter of fact as the dog trots over to you, sitting at your feet while keeping his gaze on the man unknown to him.

sherlock's eyebrows furrow, "and why was i not informed of this?"

"i'm surprised you even care," you laugh bitterly, "he's been here for a while now, and it says a lot that you're only learning of it now."

it takes sherlock a moment to answer, glancing around the room before looking back to you. "you're mad at me."

your lips purse. "what a brilliant deduction, sherlock."

he purses his lips, "i know i've been busy-"

"no, sherlock!" your voice suddenly raises and cato stands, "you haven't been home in forever. you've left me!"

when he looks down at the floor, you can feel the tears beginning to form in your eyes. "that wasn't my intention, darling." he mutters softly, taking a step towards you.

a soft growl comes from cato as he stares your husband down. "don't call me darling." you speak lowly, "you've lost that privilege."

you can see the hurt in his eyes, but you couldn't seem to care. when he shows no sign of reply, you cross your arms. "please, sherlock." you whisper, "what did i do? you've never been this distant."

"i didn't mean-"

"then why-"

"i'm scared, alright?" his voice raises, causing you to flinch. he frowns at the sight, shaking his head. "i worry i won't be a good father."

you feel a pang in your heart at his confession. out of all the reasons in the world, you never would've expected him to be scared.

"sherlock," you step toward him, "my love, you will be a wonderful father." after you drop the knife on the dining table, your hand raises to rest on his cheek and he leans into your touch. "i wouldn't want anyone else for this baby. only you."

his striking blue eyes stare into yours and you can see the guilt within them. "i'm sorry for leaving," he whispers softly.

"you better be." your volume matches his as you press a kiss to his cheek, "and if you do it again, i'll let cato maul you."

a laugh is pulled from him and you smile at the sound that you missed so much. "i promise, darling." he glances to the dog, "he's pretty cute."

"i know, right?" you look down at him, "i found him in a bush." you chuckle.

taglists

main: @horrorklaus @megasimpleplan4ever

sherlock holmes: none yet

#sherlock x reader #henry cavill sherlock holmes x reader #henry cavill sherlock x reader #sherlock holmes x reader #holmes x reader #cavill sherlock x reader #cavill sherlock holmes x reader #henry sherlock holmes x reader #henry sherlock x reader

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gay-dorito-dust · 1 year

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Taglist: @souyasbabyy @kittekat420 @mellozhi @bro-let-me-sleep

This was long overdue…also do I have any idea where this series is going? Honestly I’m just wining it, so if it seems like there’s no consistency…that’s probably bc of me wining it.

Warning: ooc hobie? Shit writing?

Butterflies can’t see the colour of their wings series:

Part 1

Part 2

part 3 (you are here)

When Hobie told you that he’d be there if you were going through something; he meant it.

When Hobie told you that you could come to him for anything that might be plaguing your mind with doubt; he meant it.

He meant every promise he’s ever made.

Every. Last. One.

However Hobie knew that to push you into telling him everything wasn’t the right way to go about solving things, and instead he should wait until you were ready to talk about the issue on your own terms. You’re amazing Hobie and I’m not dismissing your help or anything but I’m sure I can figure this out on my own, if I can’t then I’ll come to you. Were the words you spoke to him. You always wanted to figure things out yourself first before resorting to relying on others for help. While that was admirable, Hobie secretly wanted to be the one you relied on most; after overhearing what you said to Miles about the consequences of wanting what you can’t have because you felt as though you didn’t fit with him.

Which -for clarification- Hobie found to be utter and total bullshit because to him, you couldn’t have fitted better with him. He could give less of a shit about how different you were, whether it was based on lifestyles, aesthetics or differences in personalities, because at the end of the day Hobie only wished to help you realise how beautiful your butterfly wings were; and they are the most beautiful he’s ever seen that to try and describe them would be a fruitless endeavour for you made him feel all kinds of things and those things you made him feel were new and exciting.

How he wishes he could find the way to rid you forever of your self doubt and insecurities that run so deep within yourself that it was nearly impossible to find where it was that the seed of doubt was placed within your heart and soul. Hobie knew he can only say so much before it begins to sound like he was rehashing those same words in a multitude of different ways until they held no emotion nor meaning.

Another thing he often pondered to himself in his spare time was the kiss you left engraved upon his cheek that day as he often ran his calloused fingertips across it gingerly, still feeling the phantom of your lips there. He first wondered if that kiss was merely a gesture of thanks for his offer to help; nothing to be looked deeply upon for it untimely meant nothing outside your appreciation for the strong platonic bond you both built since meeting one another; Whereas he sometimes wished it was you slowly accepting his willingness to become more integrated with your life then he already is but to a more deeper and intimate level.

A level where in his fantasy you both could sit in a together in total silence as you both did your own thing, easily finding comfort within one another’s presence and knowing that you’d never be too far away from actively seeking for one another when wanting to show something.

A level where you would wear his vest outside of the excuse that you looked cold but more so because it would inherit your scent within the fabric, so that whenever he was away he would be reminded of the piece of you that he had with him, telling him that you were waiting for him back home.

A level where he could look into your eyes and see his entire life within them.

A level where he would’ve finally found a way in making you see you from his point of view; for you were a butterfly who would one day realise the colour of your wings and he was the human that would help you see their beauty and worth.

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lewisconstellation · 6 months

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plastic off the sofa

Your room smelled like Sunday beach days. Fresh breeze, the smell of the sea. The peace that only the soft tingle of sand in your feet can bring. If you closed your eyes you would hear the sound of waves coming and going, crashing on the sand. You would see the kids running toward the ocean, playing volleyball somewhere on the beach.

If you got up from the bed you were lying on, walked down the few steps that took you to the front door of your rented house in San Francisco, you would probably be facing this beautiful landscape. But the sight you have in front of you is better than that.

Lewis is sitting right in front of you. His body slumped in the leather chair, he's looking comfortable there, cozy. But his eyes had only one focus: the computer screen that rested in his lap. He looked intent, brows furrowed and lips pursed, focused on pinpointing the data the graphs provide him. Worried, he tried to find some way to make the car feel a bit faster, to help his team, to be better. He was having a hard time this season, struggling with the car. It didn't seem to cooperate with him and it took him off the top of the podium, the place where Lewis always belonged.

For the media, Lewis appeared strong, hopeful, always shielded by his beautiful words of overcoming. But for you, for you he didn't have to lie. He knew he could be himself, he felt safe to show his insecurities to you.

You let your eyes fall onto his figure again, can no longer pay attention to the episode of Gilmore Girls that was on TV. You like to see him like this, so focused on one goal. You feel your stomach clench hard at the sight. You want to sit on his lap, kiss him all over his face, repeat how much you love him. Or you just want to kneel in front of his legs, take his dick in your hands, feel his weight on your tongue, even if you had only done that a few hours ago.

You just wanted to make him forget any worries, to take away the wrinkles that graced his forehead when he was caught up in focus. Relax it. After all, that was the point of the breaks between race weekends.

But even on the few days off he had, Lewis didn't really allow himself to rest. Two daily workout sessions, piano and french lessons, data analysis and tireless hours on the simulator. He seemed restless, not able to sit still for even an hour. His hardworking spirit had already been a topic of discussion in your relationship, and from time to time it resurfaced. But you always found a way to work it out.

Usually Lewis was the first one to apologize. Flowers on your door, a handwritten letter, and a promise that he would rearrange his schedule, find enough time to rest, to disconnect from work even if it was only for a moment. He was incredibly calm, anyone who knew him could see it, feel it radiating from him. Always a conciliator, always more reasonable than you.

But sometimes you had to raise the white flag first. Less romantically than him, obviously. An apology, at night, lying in the same bed, curled up to each other, just existing together after having a great session of make up sex. You would try to find solutions to your problems. The certainty that they could solve everything, as long as they were together. But in the end, you understood him. You understood all the efforts he made to keep himself at a high level not only on the tracks, but also off them. No matter how much they wanted it, Lewis always wanted more.

"You're distracting me." Lewis muttered, so low you can barely hear him. You got so lost in your own thoughts that you didn't notice your boyfriend's sudden change of position. He's looking at you now, head up towards you. An unabashed, enduring look that makes it unable to look away. He looked hungry. Like you're his prey and he's about to devour you. Graphics are no longer his focus, your eyes have taken their place. You shift in bed, propping yourself up on your elbows to get a better look at him.

"But I'm not doing anything." Your voice sounds confused. You take a sip of the pineapple juice he brought you earlier, enjoy the cooling sensation in your throat. Your boyfriend shakes his head, moves one hand to his hair, adjusts the braids in the elastic band that holds them in a low bun. A giggle escapes from his lips as his gaze turns back to you.

"The way you're looking at me. This is distracting me. You know I can't think about anything else when you look at me like that" This is your turn to laugh. Lewis was always being so focused on his activities and a simple look distracted him. It sounded unbelievable, but you knew it was true. The same with you. A mere look, a small touch, a few words. Little gestures from Lewis were enough to make you crazy. And it was good to know you had the same effect on him.

You leave your glass on the table next to the bed, hears the tinkle of the glass material in contact with the thick wood.

"Like what? How do I look at you, Lew?" You ask. You lean your neck to the side, lean your face on your hand, slyly. He keeps looking at you, fire rising in his brown eyes. A shiver ran down your spine as you noticed the flames in his irises. His hand left his hair and went to his chin. He smoothed his beard, a smug smile painting his face. He puts the computer aside, stands up. He was in this game with you, always.

Lewis starts walking to you, his steps slow, calm, so graceful that you feel mesmerized, unable to look away from your man. You didn't know if you'd ever be able to stop looking at him, at everything you loved about him. The perfect face, framed by his newly made braids. His silky, shiny, well hydrated skin. His bright brown eyes, so kind that set you on fire and at the same time made you feel extremely loved, cared. His strong, well-built muscles, glistening in the evening light. Even his short stature. Before him, you used to say that you didn't like short men, that they weren't attractive. But Lewis. He managed to be different in everything. You've come to admire his short stature. You could see the greatness behind it. You loved all the little things that made Lewis be himself.

Suddenly, he's right in front of your bed, his legs touching the edge of it. All he's wearing is a pair of sweatpants, hanging freely around his waist, his tattooed abs exposed only to you. His hand touches your ankle, big enough to circle it completely. He squeezes it. You try to escape from his grip, try to move your leg, but Lewis is faster than you and pulls you by the ankle, a scream escaping your lips as he does. His fucking good reflex, you think. He pulls you up until you're sitting on the edge of the bed, right in front of him. He lowers himself to your level, watches you, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. Even after so long, his gaze so close, so intense, makes you nervous, restless.

Unexpectedly, he pushes you onto the soft mattress again, his body hovering over yours, your legs spread to accommodate him. His strong frame grapples your small body. One hand dropped to his side so his body weight doesn't fall all over you. The other hand gently touches your face, his hot body dangerously close to yours. His breath hovers over your face, his mouth inches from yours. You close your eyes, wait for him to kiss you, but then his face is curving and he fits right into the crook of your neck. His nose creeps over your skin slowly, smells your scent intensely. A hoarse groan comes out of his throat, looking deeply pleased to experience your scent, to be so close to you again.

"Fuck, baby. I love your smell, it is so good. You don't even know how fucking crazy it make me feel."

You make a satisfied sound at the compliment and feel your face heat up. You smile when you realize this. Few words and he left you helpless, dizzy in his arms. That was the effect Lewis had on you.

"Do you still want to know how you were looking at me?" He whispers in her ear, the husky voice more than enough to soak your panties. Not satisfied, your boyfriend lifts one of his arms, takes his hand away from your face, and leaves it on one of your breasts, covered only by a tank top you stole from him. He rubs his finger across it, creating a nice friction between the thin fabric and your skin. He makes your nipples hard quickly and you feel like you will melt under his touches. His hand quickly seeps along the side of the fabric, his fingers now in direct contact with your skin, pinching your sensitive nipple. "Answer me baby"

"Yes, yes, please!" Your voice comes out shaky, needy. He laughs at your tone. Loves how responsive you are to him. He feels proud of it, of being able to cause so many sensations in you. In give you so much pleasure that you could never find it in another person.

"You gave me that look." He pauses, his mouth licking a sensitive spot on your neck. You moan against his cheek in ecstasy. "That look you always give me when you want me to eat your pretty pussy out. The one you give me when we're partying and you just want to go back home and ride my dick. That one you give me when all you want is my dick buried deep inside of that fat pussy of yours." The effect his words have on you is inexplicable. You feel your stomach tighten, the thin fabric of your panties sticking to your skin, a sign of how wet you were for him.

Lewis finally removes his face from your neck, looks back at you, one of his hands gripping your chin, forces you to look at him. Lewis' eyes darkened and he leaned into you, capturing your mouth in a kiss and you were lost in the feel of his hot tongue on your lips. The tingling in your center got harder to ignore and you tried to ease the tension by pressing your legs together.

"Is that what you want, baby? You want daddy's cock buried deep inside of your pussy, yeah?" He asks, even though he already knows the answer. You nod your head. He had just taken you a few hours ago and you still weren't satisfied. And he didn't seem to either. You seemed addicted to each other, you never got tired of that feeling, of being intertwined with each other. This was the effect of a long-distance relationship, marked by long trips, facetime calls and different time zones. An endless longing, so strong that it hurt. So when you were together, alone, with all the time in the world just for the two of you, you wanted to enjoy it in the best way. Just couldn't help but be around him.

"I want to hear you, babygirl" Lewis mutters, pinching your chin once more. A sigh escapes your lips. He had barely touched you, but you are already completely inert, unable to put words together, to form a single sentence.

"Yeah, daddy, please" You swallow hard, brush your lips against his, kiss him one more time. He pulls back the slightest bit, rubs his thumb over her lips.

"That's all you had to say." He mumbles, lays you down completely against the mattress and rises up minimally, only to touch you with greater ease. His hands traveled down your body and stopped at the hem of your shirt. He lifts the fabric, exposes your belly, the small, wet panties you wore completely exposed to him. You spread your legs, giving him a better view of your pulsating center. A sigh escapes from you lover. He runs his finger over your wet panties, your back arches and you exhale harshly.

Your lips were parted at the small sounds, which weren't completely moans, that escaped your mouth. You didn't feel capable of formulating anything a bit elaborate when his hands were on you. Lewis ran his finger up and down slowly, teasing you, creating little shivers of pleasure through your body. But suddenly, he pauses his movements. The pad of his thumb against your core, a nice, good pressure, but it wasn't enough. You needed more.

"Tell me, baby. Tell me what you want." He asks. Always a tease, he always wanted to push you to the limit, loved to hear you begging, loved to dominate you. You take a deep breath, couldn't stand that torture for so long. Your hands reach for his face, his neatly trimmed beard tickling your fingers. You bring him close again, your lips millimeters apart.

"I want you to eat my pussy, daddy. Want you to fuck me with your tongue and then I want to cum all over your face. Please, daddy" You whisper, your fingertips caressing his face. Lewis lets out a groan when he hears you talking like that, so brazenly. It makes his cock, painfully hard against your leg, twitch. With that, his fingers curl around the sides of your hips and he finally pulls your panties down, leaving your pussy bare for him. You spread your legs once more, this time wider. You can feel it dripping, wetting the white sheets.

His eyes land on your bare pussy, open and glistening for him, soaked and pulsing around nothing. Anxiety took over his body, an uncontrollable urge to run his tongue along your damp folds, explore every part, taste you once more. Feel the strange satisfaction when you finally reach the peak.

He seems to lose himself there, continues to watch in complete adoration. You sigh impatiently, your body shaking in anticipation. Then you dip your own fingers into your heat, little noises echoing through the room evidencing just how soaked you were. You lift your fingers in front of his face, show how wet they are. "See? How much I want you?" You say, a mischievous smile painting your features.

Lewis wastes no time, takes your hands in his and licks your fingers, his tongue greedily brushing it, savoring your taste. "Your taste is so fucking good. I don't think I could ever live without it" He says, bends down, his face right in front of your needy center. His hands touched your thighs, leaning on them.

He finally seemed to take pity on you and ran his tongue all the way from your opening to your clit. You closed my eyes, a deep groan cutting through your throat.

"Don't you dare take your eyes off mine." Lewis ordered against your folds, the feel of his hot breath against your skin making you shiver. You look down, meeting his brown eyes, darker now, lust dripping from them. You feel your body tremble again under his gaze, but you don't dare look away. With his eyes locked on yours, he slowly slid his tongue between your folds. A loudly groan left your lips, your hands finding his braids, pulling them gently.

He repeated this gesture countless times, carrying the wetness from your entrance to your clit, intensifying your arousal. But then his tongue stopped at your sensitive clit, circling the area repeatedly and then sucking on it. A whimper escaped your lips, your hands squeezing his scalp harder now, trying to push his face against your pussy more intensely, trying to feel more of him. With that, your body burst into flames, flames cutting across your skin. You came violently, shivering and moaning his name loud and clear.

You think he's going to stop, pull away, give you some time to recover before he pushes into you. But he doesn't stop. He kept eating you relentlessly. His fingers work on you now, two of them inside of you, moving in and out quickly as his tongue sucks your clit. Everything feels more intense now, the sensations driving you off the cliff quickly. Your hip starts to move involuntarily, trying to keep up with the rhythm of his fingers. You throw your head back, eyes closed. Feel your whole body shudder, come again. The second time was even more ravishing than the first.

Your shaky legs close around Lewis' head, you couldn't take it anymore, your body had been reduced to a whimpering mess, but he didn't seem to get tired. He seemed determined to take one more orgasm out of you and so he did, taking everything out of you until you were completely spent. You were in a state of ecstasy, moaning incoherently, whispering Lewis' name over and over.

When he rises up again, you find your lover licking his lips, removing the remnants of your flavor. He also looks like a mess, pupils dilated, cheeks flushed, beard damp, wet with his juices. He seems to have enjoyed it as much as you did at that moment. Always so attentive and so devoted to you, your pleasure was his too.

He holds your face with both hands, licks your lips before kissing you. When your own taste invades your senses, you moan, caressing his shoulders, reveling in the sensation. So promiscuous and dirty, but at the same time so intimate and loving.

He pulls back again, his fingers plucking at your shirt, lifts the fabric and runs it down your arms, finally stripping you naked. He looked at you intensely, appreciating your features carefully, admiring your body as if it was the first time he was seeing it. It makes your face flush and your heart beats faster in your chest. Each time you gave yourself completely to Lewis it was different, sometimes more romantic, sometimes more aggressive, but always intense, overwhelming. Each time was unique, with its own emotions, but they all ended up flooding your mind with memories of the first time he made you his. It was always new, but it was also always permeated by an old feeling, which was present every time.

"You're so fucking beautiful. I will never get tired of looking at you." He mumbles sincerely. You could never control your emotions when he talked to you like that. He knew how to balance things so well, always so good. He set you on fire and at the same time made you feel so loved. You felt your heart do somersaults in your chest.

Lewis takes his time with you, kisses your neck, your breasts, your belly, his hot tongue leaving sparks wherever he goes. You lift your body slightly, your fingers reaching for the waistband of the gray sweatshirt he was wearing. You don't think twice before pushing it down. Lewis laughs at your eagerness, pulls back a little so he can remove his pants properly.

Seeing him naked was always overwhelming, destructive. You would never get used to that sight, you could never get tired of it. Strong shoulders, hard muscles, well built. The dark tattoos, delicate lines on his skin. You move your gaze down his abdomen, until you get there. His cock felt painfully hard, throbbing against his lower abdomen. God, it was perfect. Big and thick, it felt heavy against his skin. You feel your pussy throb as your eyes focus on the light veins covering him, his head rosy and full of precum.

He comes back to you, hands tucking your thighs, keeping you open for him. His heavy cock drops between your folds, the first contact makes you moan. Lewis rubs his length there, collecting your wetness and spreading it on his cock. He repeats the movement over and over again. Your impatience grows and your body trembles beneath his, seems to break into tiny pieces every time he slides into you. You would never be able to have the same self-control, the same patience he had.

"God, can you feel it? Can you feel how fucking hard I am? How fucking hard you make me feel?" He says, eyes glued to yours. You feel your chest heat up when you hear this. He was like this because of you, always because of you.

"Jesus, Lewis" You moan, devastated, impatient. "Just fuck me" A laugh escapes his lips, a boyish smile.

"My pretty slut, always so eager to be full of me, huh?" You nod desperately. It wasn't a lie. "On all fours for me, baby," Lewis says, his voice harsh, authoritative. You promptly obey his command and turn around, get on all fours in the middle of the bed, propped up on your forearms. Belly down and ass up for him. You feel Lewis positioning himself behind you and you squirm in anticipation.

"Fuck, you look so sexy like this" You hear your lover muttering. His hands touch your bum and he slaps you hard there, making you scream. He repeats the movement and you feel your skin prickling, the pleasure and pain mixing together, driving you crazy. "Gonna fuck you now, my pretty girl"

Lewis keeps his promise. You catch your breath at the feel of him entering your heat, plunging deep into you, stretching your tight pussy. "God, you're so fucking wet, baby. So tight for me" He murmurs, planting kisses down her spine before returning to his original position and sliding his length into my pussy again."Feels so fucking good". He cups the back of your head, presses your face against the mattress, and starts moving, painfully slow, deep thrusts, the way he knew drove you crazy. The room was filled with the sounds of Lewis' frames hitting your ass, his heavy balls moving back and forth in time with his thrusts. It was all extremely erotic and only made you wetter.

His hands leave his neck and reach for your disheveled hair, tugging hard on the strands, until you're upright, his chest pressed against your back. Everything looks perfect that way. The hard muscles of his abdomen pressed against you, his hot breath on your neck, strong hands gripping your waist and your hair. The new angle makes you gasp, lose your breath and all your senses. His fingers move again and reach for your chin, turning your face to the side, just enough so he could kiss your lips. He keeps moving at a torturously slow pace, reaching deep inside you. You gasp into his mouth.

Lewis moves his hand from your waist to your sensitive clit, rubbing the area ruthlessly as he thrusts. You parted your lips from his to moan his name out loud as a wave of overwhelming pleasure washed over his body.

"Fuck, daddy, I'm gonna cum. Shit, I'm gonna fucking cum" You can't control yourself and come, squeezing his length, soaking him in your juices.

"That's it, baby. Soak daddy's dick just like that." He murmurs in your ear, bites the earlobe, then licks the side of your neck. You throw your head on his shoulder as he fucks you through your orgasm, fighting to control himself, to make that moment last, to give you as much pleasure as he can.

You screamed in surprise as he laid your body down on the mattress again, his body falling on top of your right after, choking you in the best way he could. Lewis' strong muscles covered your body, his hands reached for yours and held them. He pushed his hips back into you, his rhythm now fast, relentless, just the way he liked it. You try to roll your hips beside him, just fast as he's doing.

"You like it rough, don't you, baby girl?" He whispers, a russky voice in your ear. You feel a lonely tear running down your cheek, the pleasure so hard it makes you cry. You felt your pussy tighten around him again and you came once more, a muffled moan escaping your lips.

Lewis couldn't control himself this time, your pussy clenching so tight on his cock he couldn't hold back anymore. "I'm gonna fill you up, baby. Gonna let you full of me one more time." And with that, he came deep inside you, his hot cum painting your soft walls. A deep, almost animalistic moan escaped his lips.

Countless minutes pass and you both lie in bed the same way, Lewis's heavy body crushing yours, his cock writhing, pulsing inside you. You could stay like this for the rest of your life, you think. But at some point he moves, his cock sliding out of you. Both of you sigh at the loss of contact.

He lies down on the mattress again, pulls you to lie on top of him. Your head against his chest, his legs tangled with yours. You feel his cock, still semi-hard against your thigh. It makes you sigh.

His heartbeat is against your palm. His heart is beating in a smooth rhythm, his breathing controlled. His hands reach for your back, fingers running up and down your skin, imaginary designs being made there. You smile, inert, and feel him doing the same. Watch the horizon in front of you, the dark sky through the big bedroom windows, feel the cool breeze coming through them.

Lying there, on his chest, feeling his body hug yours, you felt in the right place. All you needed was right here, snuggling with you, you didn't need the world's acceptance. A feeling of peace took over your body, your eyelids began to feel heavy and closed. You could hear Lewis's quiet breathing, his chest rising and falling slowly. An "I love you" is the last thing you hear before you fall asleep.

#lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton smut #lewis hamilton one shot #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton x you

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mvltisstuff · 1 year

Text

how to save a life - e.b

summary: a five alarm for a skyscraper fire puts one of 118’s own in risk.

evan buckley x reader

pray 4 me this is 4k words

edit: HELP DID I JUST FORESHADOW THE S2 FINALE WHAT THE FUCK BUCK

after maddie moved to los angeles, and doug was finally dead, buck felt like everything might finally fall into place. everything had been a mess, but he thought his life was coming together with his new self. he never thought his “new” self would be the one to solve the puzzle.

cases had calmed and his long-needed love had finally come into his life.

y/n clicked immediately when arriving as a new recruit to 118. being a trained paramedic firefighter, she was genius and quick. buck admired her, even though he hadn’t been there over a year when she came.

the two started going on calls together, the easy ones and the troublesome ones. she patched up his cuts, and he iced her bruises. the connection they had was different from most of the first responders in the system.

they knew it was against the rules as they started hanging out more and more. and the more he fell for her. he hadn’t even looked at anyone else because his eyes had become hers.

evan was charming, and speedy on responses. she looked at him with pure respect and adoration whenever he walked in. he lit up the room when he walked in and his attempts to improve himself were encouraging.

the fire between them was jumping floors and the sparks were flying, and everyone knew it. eddie, chim, hen, hell even athena knew.

y/n helped find maddie when she was taken and when chim was hurt. she had been going home with buck when chimney had been on the ground surrounded by crimson.

she hasn’t left bucks side in months, and he hasn’t left hers.

the day had been quiet, which is usually hoped for in their line of work. nothing had happened besides a few small incidents. it was reaching sunset, eddie was clearing plates away and bobby was moving his ingredients back. y/n was organizing the locker rooms, moving things around and cleaning it up.

buck came up behind her, disturbing her quiet. “you hiding from everyone?” he asks, sarcastically. he places his hands on her shoulders and turns her around.

“i’m not hiding,” she smiles. “you just like to keep your locker like it’s a hoarder's closet.”

“haven’t gotten around to it.” he drags out, leaving a soft kiss on her cheek.

he pulls back at the sound of an alarm, raising his brows. “something interesting?”

“god, i hope. i know that’s bad but i need something to keep me up.” the two run out and pull on their gear, climbing into the back of the truck.

“we got 20 stories on beverly, fire started on 7, moving up.” bobby informs through the headphones.

“do they know what started it?” buck asks.

“not yet, all they know is fires jumping floors and we’re gonna need some backup for this one.” bobby pulls out his radio as they pull up to the complex. “unit 118 requesting any units available at 1453 Beverly, backup at 1453 Beverly.”

“shit, this interesting enough for you?” y/n asks buck. he shoots her a quick smirk and looks back at the building. the team shuffles out of the truck, seeing some civilians already making their escape.

“ok, ma’am come over here and we can get you checked out, sound alright?” her sweet, relaxing voice made buck smile.

“eddie, buck, get in there and start hitting this thing. hen, get as many people out of there as you can, no elevator.” captain starts handing out orders and assigning people to places. different teams were going to different floors and the firefighters ran into the burning building. “y/n/n, get in there and start clearing out.”

“on it, sir.”

y/n and buck walked in, but eventually went their separate ways.

———————————————————————

buck and eddie had gotten everyone on the floor out, and everyone above had been taken out. it had been hours, and the fire was still moving. it had become weaker, but was surely still there. buck and eddie had moved out, but y/n was still on the 2nd floor.

she had finally gotten the majority out. people had gone down the staircase and met up with the people who were evacuating them.

a boy in particular had been having trouble and he caught her eye. she had walked over to him to try and help him. he was scared out of his mind, barely letting her touch him to get him out. they were the last two, and had a few minutes to get out. the squeaking of the floor and the crackling of the walls was getting louder by the minute.

the boy was having trouble breathing, and he couldn’t be over 15. the heat was coming through his body, having no protection from it even through his thick clothing.

“hey, buddy, i know it’s scary but you have to try and breathe for me so we can get out of here!”

“where’s my mom?” he shouts.

“listen, we can go find her now, grab my hand and we’ll go see.” he was still hesitant, shaking away. “hey, kid. y/l/n, see?” she points to the name on her jacket. “i know you’re scared but i’m not going to let anything happen ok

“y/n… is she dead?” he asks, shakily, with tears in his eyes.

“i don’t know, buddy, but i haven’t heard anything. we aren’t giving up, cmon.” she reached out to pull him in, and the heat was drowning his body. his lungs were taking in smoke and she had to act fast.

ripping off her mask, she puts it on the boy. she covers him with a layer of her jacket. her main goal was to get this boy to his mom, and there wasn’t anything that was gonna get in her way.

she forced the boy to come down, fighting life or death. the hardwood floors began to weaken, holding the weight up by a string. the cracks were visible on the stained wood, and the smell of burning was pushed into their nose.

when walking over, the cracks on the floor thickened, and got deeper. the pieces of wood were falling. y/n had no choice. it was fight to get this boy back to his mom, or give up and let the fire eat away at them.

she heard the snapping of wood. she felt the collapse of the floor. the structure became too weak, and the tiles and rocks came falling down.

y/n's first instinct was to cover him. he had to be safe. her job was to protect the vulnerable and scared, and she can’t live with herself if she doesn’t do anything to try.

the two landed straight on the first floor in the back of the building. the leftover debris falling onto her already fragile body. the boy was pushed off to the side, hitting his head. y/n looked over. he was awake and moving, but in visible pain. she tried to get up and walk over to him, but she was barricaded down.

tables and desks and materials from the other floors had fallen onto her legs, and a piece of metal had fallen onto her abdomen. the pain was incredible. she didn’t remember feeling pain like this before. she groaned out in pain, heavily breathing.

“y-y/l/n? are you- ok?” he coughs for a few moments, struggling over his words. his eyes were fluttering. she tried to breathe and respond, but the air was getting thicker and her fight response was giving out.

“stay, here. they’re g- gonna find us. just stay awake for me, i know your head hurts.” she needs him to stay conscious. to get help, to save himself.

maybe even save her. she felt ridiculous. the person doing the saving needed to be saved.

when she looked back over, he leaned against a fallen desk. she noticed the slight rise and fall of his chest, and the cut on his temple. his arms were folded by his side.

looking over at him, she yelled as loud as she could. “help! please- buck!” she screams out in hopes that they’ll hear. “cap! anyone please…”

her head is light from all the screaming and the weight she’s carried. the spark of her fight response was blown down, and she let her eyes succumb to darkness.

———————————————————————

“captain nash, we’re handing out a direct order, all evacuation of first responders needs to happen now. the second floor is down.” said a voice over bobby’s radio.

“we’re waiting on y/l/n,” he says. “chim, hit her and tell her to get out.”

“yes, sir.” chim pulls out his radio and switches it on the line. “y/n, gotta get out of there now!”

“y/n/n, do you copy?”

“y/n, again, do you copy?” as he asks a third time, buck makes his way over to him with eddie trailing behind. “what’s going on?” he asks.

bobby and chim exchange nervous looks, knowing that buck needs to know but also that he could make an impulsive move.

“y/n’s not responding. a complete evacuation has been called.” bobby tells buck.

“well what the hell are we doing standing around? we have to get in there!” his voice raises and he shuffles around with his helmet.

“no can do, buckley.” the feminine voice from earlier rings in. “no one in, it’s too risky. we have to stay out of the building.”

“cap cmon, you aren’t really standing back from this, right?” buck shakes his head and stands taller.

“you heard her.” bobby looks down, almost ashamed that he’s giving up. “gather the rest of 118 and we’re going to make room.”

buck stands there in shock. the anger and adrenaline flows through his veins, ready to go back in and get y/n. “are you serious? what is this shit, she would be running back in for one of us?”

“buck..” chim tells him just over a whisper, placing his hand on bucks shoulder.

buck grips his arm and shoves it off. “no! this is ridiculous, we don’t know where she is!”

the officer from before walks away, and as she’s far enough, bobby grabs more gear. “hen!” he shouts out. “stay out here and tell dispatch we need an ambulance.” he looks back over to buck. “this isn’t the first time we’ve rejected an order and it isn’t the last.”

———————————————————————

the four walk in, hearts pounding trying to prepare themselves for what happened. a million things swim through bucks mins. maybe her radio was crushed, or she’s already out and unaccounted for. or she was already gone.

“y/n!” buck screams out over the rubble.

“LAFD, call out!” bobby shouts in front of him.

chim and eddie move big pieces away and search around for any signs of people. buck runs around frantically, stumbling over wood and metal. a clattering is heard from a distance.

“cap, listen.” chim commands.

a boys voice echoes through the high ceilings and tight floors. “he-lp, please.” he forces out.

buck immediately moves as fast as he can. he remembers her voice through the radio, saying that she was with a young kid on the second floor. second floor, the one that collapsed and left all the mess on the first floor. when the team looks up, they notice more than one hole in the roof. they saw a broken floor, and another one above it. the third floor had come down soon after the second.

“guys, over here!” they hear eddie. they rapidly make their way over to see the boy. “he’s bleeding on his head with a laceration to the temple. he’s loopy but doesn’t look much worse than the head.”

“she.. covered me over here,” he mutters. “when the floor fell in, so nothing fell right on me.”

“ok, son. can you tell us your name?” chim says, shining his light into his eyes. “he looks good, nothing to worry about too much. he’s gonna be fine.”

“j-jackson. the woman- she covered me.”

“jackson, what woman? who is she?” buck comes closer, trying to wean every answer he can get out of this boy. “hey! where did she go?”

“buck, relax. if we found him she’s not far.” bobby tries to calm him down, and buck turns around to face him.

out of the corner of his eye, buck sees the yellow reflectance on the floor. a small hand was at the end of it. he sees the swoops of y/ns hair spread out across the floor. surrounding her was a group of cinder blocks and brick.

a massive slab of wall and the body of a desk had forced itself down onto her calf, and a piece of thick pipe had landed on her abdomen. “y/n!” buck runs over, pushing any of the obstacles out of the way. “oh my god, chim, cap, get over here now!”

“y/n, hey! y/n! hey wake up! please, you have to say something!” bucks eyes fill up with moisture seeing his girl buried under rocks in a lifeless look. bobby and chim pull the chunks off her leg and eddie runs over. buck touches the sides of her face with his hands, running his finger down the ash and cut above her eye.

“baby, cmon, move!” he cries, begging her unconscious self to give him a sign.

“i can't find a pulse!” eddie spits out, ready to get her back.

“she must’ve hit her head on the way down, there’s blood in her hair.”

“shit, shit shit!” buck says, moving his arms and beginning compressions. “you’re gonna be ok, this is not the day.” he pants out, forcing these compressions.

“buck..”

“no! y/n/n, come back, please.”

after over a minute of compressions and watching bucks heart crumple with each push, eddie places his fingers gently back onto her neck. “checking for a pulse. it’s there! it’s weak, but it’s there.”

“hen, get a board in here and let LA general we’re en route.” bobby chimes into his radio.

the team places her onto the board, securing her neck and carrying her still body out to the ambulance. buck, in heavy tears, begins to climb into the back.

“no, buck, come this way.”

“what? no, are you kidding? i’m not leaving her!”

“they have her. she’s in good hands and they need room in there.” bobby pulls him back as they shut the doors to the vehicle.

“she could’ve died in there.” his voice cracks and fades out.

“buck, listen to me. she’s alive now. we do what we can.”

———————————————————————

“26 year old female, slight head wound and major leg injuries, blunt trauma to the abdomen,” chim climbs out, pushing the stretcher out into the doors of the hospital. “cpr performed at scene.”

“we got her, page ortho and gen, clear trauma 2 and book and prep O.R 3…” the voice of the surgeon disappears through the chaos of the hospital. patients from all over and the specific building they were at had been piled up at the closest but best hospital in los angeles.

———————————————————————

the waiting room had been filled with first responders. all of 118 was there, and maddie came to be with buck, who hadn’t arrived yet.

athena was the escort to the hospital, speedily driving buck and bobby over to be with their own.

y/n was one of the best. she knew that there was more to the job than just hoses and fire extinguishers. there were people, scared, innocent people having the worst day of their life. she was along every step of the way with her coworkers.

she was the most selfless person buck knew. she got him out of bed when there wasn’t anything to get out for. she made him better and there isn’t a single person buck wants more than her.

half of his heart had been ripped away when her voice didn’t come through the radio. he felt like one of his legs had lost its cast and he wasn’t sure if he would be able to walk again.

he sprints into the hospital doors, searching for the nearest person he knows. “maddie..”

“hey, come here.” she pulls him into a crushing hug and lets him sob into her shoulder.

“she looked dead, maddie. i really thought she was dead.”

“she’s not, she’s in surgery.”

“what did the doctor say?” he asks, pulling away. he almost doesn’t want to know, because it could be anything.

“she has a concussion from hitting her head when landing, and a blunt abdomen trauma from the pipe that landed on her.” she frowns and can barely make eye contact with her little brother.

“jesus christ, so she won’t be back for a bit, huh?”

“no, not for a few months at least. her x-rays showed a tibial shaft fracture in the middle,” she looked over at her pale brother. she’s known him since the moment he was born and has never seen him like this. “buck, sit down. she’s going to be ok.”

maddie leads him over to sit next to her and hen, who reassuringly rubs his shoulder. hen was sat next to chim, whose knee was bouncing under his elbow. some of the firefighters from other districts had even come to support 118. they sat for hours. it felt like years to buck, years he had to wait to see her.

after the painstaking moments of waiting, the doctor walks out. buck is the first to stand up and walk over, followed by the captain.

“she’s stable. she’s knocked out now from anesthesia and we gave her a dose of morphine for the pain. she’s gonna heal, but she’ll be out for a while. she’s gonna need a lot of time and support these next few months.”

“did she wake up at all after you took her in?” bobby asks.

“she was trying to talk a bit in the trauma room. she was able to force out a few words that one of the interns caught. she was asking for a particular person.”

“someone get Garnier down here to look at this leg, we need to get oxygen set up. Souzia, check out the back of her head to make sure that’s nothing to be worried about.” the main doctor spat out orders at his fellows.

“pushing 10mg of morphine.” another voice shouts through, standing above y/n.

“doctor B, she’s waking up a bit!” one of the interns says.

“b-buck.” she squeaks out, barely audible.

“hey, y/n?”

“w-where’s buck? i need t-to see him…”

“ok, miss, it’ll be ok. calm her down a bit and let the OR know we’re coming up.”

“buck, she wanted you.” the doctor says. they know the team by now, they come in all the time.

he didn’t really know what to say, he tried getting out words but failed.

“can we see her?” bobby questions.

“she’s in the ICU, hooked up to a lot of machines. it looks scary, but she’s ok. she’s still out like a light, it could be a while before she wakes up. i can take you to her room to keep her company.” she looks around at the team. “i can't fit you all in there. i’m usually not allowed to do this but i can sneak the five of you in.”

buck, bobby, hen, chimney, and eddie all follow her down the hall like little ducklings. they pass the rooms of people with casts and intubation. they take in the smell of antiseptics and new bandages. the sounds of beeping and hissing of tubes fills their ears and the dimming colors of the hospital in the night overwhelm their senses.

buck reaches the only room he cares about, and the sliding of the door reveals the worst sight he’s seen in a while.

her body was cleaned up and placed in a spotted gown. her leg was wrapped up and a white piece of gauze was wrapped around the top of her head like a headband. her heartbeat was stable on the machine and through fear and panic, the steady beeping brought him down a little. he walked in a little closer and shakily inhaled. one of the chairs had been pulled closer to the bed, and he sat down slowly.

“she’s not gonna break, buck.” hen’s soothing voice comes into the room. “you can touch her.” he looks up at hen with shiny eyes, glossed with tears that have yet to fall onto his red cheeks. he picks up her hand, like if he touched her fingers they’d snap. he puts his other on top of it and pulls it up to his lips, planting a sweet kiss onto her knuckles.

chim sits down on the opposite side, and hen walks over to stand near him. bobby stands at the end of the bed, holding onto the railing at the end. “you did good, y/l/n.”

“we’re gonna have to be at our best without you there.” chim jokes. “i’ll take over for your jobs on calls. you know, handling the machinery and stuff.

“chim, we’ve been over this. you are not handling the machinery.” hen laughs and a smile creeps up onto buck’s face.

“we’re gonna throw… a huge party for you when you come back.” buck says. “and everyone’s gonna be there to see you, so you gotta come back from this.”

“she will, it’s gonna take way more than this to take her out of the game.” bobby looks around. “i don’t even think the chief could if he wanted to.”

buck hides his sobs into his arm, concealing his face from the rest of the people in the room. he felt so weak, like someone had played a joke on him. it had always been y/n and buck against the world, and now it felt like they were in the center of the ring.

they all look at him with pure sadness. they’ve never seen him as such a mess. the happy, uplifting, and motivated buck was carried by y/n. they all knew it, but didn’t realize the extent until that was almost ripped away from his grasp. hen moves over and pulls him against her. the comfort of her grasp makes buck cry even harder. “i love her so much, i need her here with me.”

“i know, it’s ok, buck.” she holds onto him and bobby and chim watch from a distance. “but she’s not going anywhere.”

buck pulls back and wipes his tears. “i know. i can’t handle seeing her like this again.”

the doctor comes back into the room, disturbing the peace between them. “sorry to interrupt, but i have to kick some of you out now.”

“buck, stay with her.” bobby says.

“i wasn’t planning on going anywhere, so.” he watches them walk away when he speaks out again. “bobby?”

“yeah kid?”

“thank you.” bobby nods and says, “keep her safe, pal.”

buck sits there for hours, fighting sleep from the last shift. his eyes threaten him by almost closing, but he sits up and doesn’t let them. his hand, that hasn’t left hers, adjusts on the bed a little as he leans forward.

“i feel ridiculous, kinda like i’m talking to myself. no offense.” he tries lightening the mood, but he still feels like he’s at the bottom. “seeing you there under all that shit was the worst moment of my life. my heart dropped and it… it was unbearable, y/n. i really thought you were dead. you looked so… you looked gone. like i was too late. but we came back for you. i’ll always come back for you.”

“you’re my safe place, y/n. i couldn’t have continued without you. coming home with you every night… you’ve made me a better person. just, meeting up with girls to have sex and forget about it. you just… you’re my person. you’ll always be my person and i’m not leaving you these next few months whether you like it or not.”

he sits back down in the chair, slightly angled to his side. he checks the time on his phone as his shines out 5:36 AM. he sighs and turns it off, shoving it away. he tries to get as comfortable as he can in his uniform. he’s stayed up with her all night, and waiting has killed him. he was drained, so he allowed himself to fall asleep after 24 hours.

———————————————————————

he woke up in the same space, his same position, with her hand in his. it took him a minute to get his brain together.

“hey.” she speaks out, looking over.

“hey.” he grumbles back, looking over. he smiles without making eye contact, and then he looks over at her squinting eyes. “wait, oh my god, hey.”

he sits up and she laughs, “ouch.”

“yeah, be careful, but, holy shit. when did you wake up?”

“a little while ago, around 8-ish.”

“do you, like, feel ok? i don’t even know what to say.”

“other than a broken leg and my stomach hurts, i’m good.” the corners of her mouth raised. “i’m ok.”

bucks lip starts to shake a little before he bites on it to stop it. the waterworks start again out of relief. he puts his head on the bed with her hand on his forehead.

“buck, hey,” she giggles a little at how worked up he got. “don’t cry, please. i’m ok.”

“you almost died, y/n. you basically did! i was so scared, i thought.. man, your heart stopped and watching you get carried away and having to sit here an-“

her face drops a little. she never really realized the extent of what happened until he repeats it now. “i know, baby. i was scared too. i was scared you wouldn’t find me, but i’m yours. always will be.”

he stands up and kisses her again and she wipes his tears away. “well, get ready because visiting hours start at 9. people went home but they’re coming back at 8:59.”

———————————————————————

“you should’ve seen that floor,y/n” bobby said. “the two ceilings were gone.”

“sorry, bobby, i was busy having them on top of me.” buck still holds her hand, barely being able to let it go. he lets out another sob and puts his head down. “buck! love, i’m fine!”

“i know, i know.” he says, pulling his head back up and swiping away the wetness on his face. “i’m just relieved, you have no idea.”

she places her soft hands on his cheek and looks around again. “what about that boy? i covered him and he passed out- is he ok?”

“he’s fine. jackson was able to go home already.”

she sighs. “well at least that wasn’t for nothing.”

“you did real good, y/n.” bobby says.

“you did so good, baby.” buck says, landing another kiss on her hand.

by the door, y/n hears a pair of crutches come into the room. christopher is far ahead of eddie as his adorable smile spots her. “y/n!”

“hey buddy!” she puts her arms out and he walks over to her, all the other firefighters have bright smiles. everyone loves him.

“chris!” eddie follows in, just a few beats behind. “wait for me next time, kid.”

“i’m glad you’re okay.” he says.

“thanks, i’m glad i’m ok too. now i just have to get back to work.” y/n says.

“better hurry, chim’s ready to take your place over here.” maddie says.

“i never said that!”

“chim, you’re welcome to take my role while i’m out.” she laughs and grimaces.

“take it easy, babe.” buck says, already loading his overprotection.

“it means a lot that you guys are here.”

“no where else we’d rather be.” eddie says. “someone was clearly dying to get over here.” pointing to christopher. buck looks over to y/n, who’s eyes have shut a little. she’s hiding the pain, the morphine helps, but it’s still a lot.

“i think we should let her rest a bit, we can see her again soon.” bobby says, also noticing the tiredness.

loads of, “feel better, y/n” and “see you soon”s came her way as she accepted each goodbye. the room was cleared, and the lights were still dimmed.

“go back to sleep, i’ll be here when you wake up.” buck smiles and sits back.

“thank you.”

“for what?”

“for not giving up on me.”

he leans back over her, leaving the hundredth kiss. “never in a million years.”

a/n - sorry for the medical jargon if it’s half wrong i haven’t watched greys in a while 🫠 i’m also only on season 3 dont attack me 😭

#911onfox #911 #evan buckley #evan buckley x reader #evan buck buckley x reader #bobby nash #eddie diaz #911 fanfic #evan buckley fanfiction #evan buckley fanfic

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