#sad james potter :(

[hedgehog-troops]

i want james potter who just when he starts dating regulus/lily, is so surprised when the actually want to hang out with him, have dates with him which dont just lead to having sex.

the first time the decide to have a sleepover, things begin to escalate, and after james declines, he makes out to leave, hes told that its fine if they dont have sex, not everything has to end with sex.

and james is just like 🧍‍♂️ when hes told that his worth is not defined by his body. hes so confused because his previous partners always complimented his toned body as they traced their fingers all over them, but when now hes praised for his mind, eyes, heart and soul, he finds that once empty feeling replaced by an ooey gooey one, and he realised oh. this is what love is supposed to feel like.

[dreamer0903]

After his death, Regulus Black comes back as a sunflower because he is always looking for the sun.

☀️⭐️

[vomits0cutely]

Regulus “I can’t love you, anymore” Black.

James “I can’t love you any more” Potter.

[hotdamnitsmoony]

james potter who wants to be there for his friends, no matter what. james potter who always gives a shoulder to cry on and advice when it’s needed. james potter who’s known as the sunshine friend, the one that’s always happy. james potter who is struggling but doesn’t want anyone to know. james potter who loves with his whole heart. james potter who gives and gives until he can’t anymore. james potter who cries in his bed once all his friends are asleep because he doesn’t want them to know he’s hurting. james potter who thinks he has to be the brave one. james potter who just wants his happy ending.

[reggie-kin-forever]

Okay so i love the trope ‘loves person A like it’s breathing’ and person A ‘thinks they’re unloveable’ especially for jegulus but i want to switch it up. What if it’s james who thinks he is unloveable.

Hear me out: James potter who has the biggest heart in the world and is friends with almost everybody who give out his love, no conditions and he loves that about himself, but then he slowly start to hate that part of himself and that’s where the problem starts.

He started to hate that part of himself after he noticed how he’s make plans with sirius or lily or marlene a week in advance and on the day of, sometimes minutes before, they’d call or text and cancel because they have other things to do with other people that ‘just came up’ and it’s always such a melancholy experience to have had plans with his friends played out ready to go and excited and for them to just cancel.

At first he told himself that they were just busy, or that he was okay with it but he remembers days where marlene really needed help trying to impress dorcas on a date and he dropped everything leading to him being up until 4 in the morning working on a potions essay, or when he and remus were meant to go study in the library because James was falling behind in transfiguration because he didn’t want Minnie to know and then Sirius intercepted them and said that “studying is boring” and so they all decided to go do something fun and james dropped a letter, causing Minnie to pull him after class and have a talk.

It really was just small things but as time went on he noticed more. More how when he tried to make plans his friends would say yes and then never show because they ‘forgot’ or wanting to hang out, even if it was just sitting in silence together and they would say that they couldn’t for whatever reason. At first he tried to reason that he made plans with everybody so often that well they just didn’t consider canceling one hangout was that big a deal, and it wasn’t. But after the 5th time in a row lily canceled on there weekly tea and book, where james made tea and lily told him about what book she was reading because he found literature so astounding he himself was just unable to sit and read them, the idea kinda just swam off in his train of thought.

Slowly he stopped asking his friends to hangout and they didn’t seem to notice. He kept giving them the love from himself but he could hardly ever pinpoint exactly where anyone else was giving him the love right back. It was enough for him to be unable to believe in love. His own friends seem to be actively pulling away from him and it is just so daunting that he had no idea what to do.

And then there’s Regulus. Regulus black. Slytherin house’s Casanova. The boy who received at least 3 marriage proposals a day. The boy who is known for his stubbornness, and resilience, and his celibacy. Most think it’s because of his family name and knowing that he’ll be married off to someone which is why he doesn’t date, but the truth is that from the moment he stepped into hogwarts the only person he has ever been able to look at his golden boy James Potter. James Potter who is captain of the quidditch team. James potter who is nice and friendly to about anything that moves. James potter who even though fits the stereotype of an empty headed jock to a tea is #4 in his graduating class rank right behind Lily Evans.

It really was astounding to anyone who might sit and ponder just how it happened. James potter the boy who is willing to love everyone and everything even if it kills him, and Regulus Black, the boy wanted by almost everyone in school but rejects them all in favor of his own time, end up together.

Well one day after james felt extraordinary left out he went to the astronomy tower to watch as the starts in the night fled from sight, just out of reach for the one thing they were chasing after. He sat there for a while, probably 2 hours. He wondered if his friends noticed he was gone, it was only 7 o’clock when he left. By the time it was 8 a body sat down next to him. He didn’t bother looking over, assuming it was sirius by the black hair he could see in his peripheral.

“What’s up stranger?” it was a voice he was unfamiliar with, and far to smooth the be sirius’. He looked over at the boy and saw what he could only determine as a greek god sent down from above to give him the gift of true beauty for once in his life.

It really was an odd situation to those who may ask. They had no idea how james the fun loving idiot was the one self conscious of himself and how the stubborn genius was the one who protected him with all he had in his body.

After harry was born he was told the story 2 different ways, from both parents’ point of view.

Regulus told a story of a beautiful popular boy, locked away in his own head, afraid that he gave too much love for anyone to soak up logically. Then came alone his sponge with Black hair and gray eyes who was willing to give him the world even if it meant the end of all things.

James tells it that he was sad one night and a greek god with tantalizing gray eyes hypnotized him into falling in love in an instant, and he never had to worry about being unloved again.

Harry grew up seeing unconditional love at its very core. The little they did fight, was never serious and when it was, it never faltered how much they loved and respected each other. It’s the love written out in muggle love story’s and it’s the love everyone wishes to achive

[lustemotions]

JAMES' DIARY! P.2

Midnight thoughts.

Something about his memory.

Volume I.

“I don’t why but here I am, pretending i’m writing to you again.

It’s really late and your memory still haunts me to this day, because I miss you (and your voice, and your texts, and your lips).

Because I miss the rush of talking to you daily, about that sweet little pot you bought for you new flower or how stressful was one of your hard classes.

I know I still miss the excitement of our deep and light conversations, our sweet memories losing themselves on the shelves of an empty heart.

Poetic, yes?

It was not difficult letting you in once you made your way to me all over again, after so many months of our fallout. It was so easy letting you talk about how my feelings were never enough, because I’d never love you the way I loved her.

It has so hard not to stop you from dismissing my emotions, drop to my knees and beg you to take me back.

You were right. She never left my mind nor my heart. She always had a piece of the old me between her delicate touch.

She was the one I loved the most.

But you were the one who never left my soul rest in peace.

Because I loved you so much that it consumed me and doomed me to live in hell for the rest of my days.

I guess, what i’m trying to say is that…

For me, it was always you.

And sometimes, I still believe it’s you.”

[i-will-turn-your-children-gay]

james “maybe these arms were

meant for everyone but no one’s were meant for me”potter

and

regulus “darling my arms were made only to hold you” black

[b0wi3sgir1]

James: I’m just always happy, what can I say :D

Regulus:

James:

Regulus:

Regulus: do you wanna tell me what happened or?

James: *with tears in his eyes* oh don’t worry nothing happened

Regulus: *hugs him*

James: *sobbing uncontrollably*

[hedgehog-troops]

Headcannon that Monty loved regulus more and effie lived Sirius more. James was just in the middle.

i feel like this has so much oitential for angst, where james grew up loved by both his parents because he had some traits from them both and never understood the mommy's/daddy's kid stereotype because he loved them both equally.

and then come sirius and regulus and he watches the way montys eyes light up talking to regulus about potions, how they can talk for hours, how they always disappear together for ages.

he watches effie and sirius bond over the randomist things and watching them do make-up together, doing everything together, making hot chocolate together, gossiping together and james is just there.

he isnt the favroite, he isnt the one thats be willingly sought out, hes just loved.

he knows he shoukdnt but he misses the way his parents would have unlimited time for him, how he could randomly think if smthng and just come downstairs and tell them, unlike now when he comes, Monty is doing expiraments with regulus and sirius and effie are engaged in conversation whikst playing chess.

he consideres himself the worst person for being jealous of them, but he knows that they deserve it more than him.

[kiwi2229]

Racing against the tide

(James Potter / Regulus Black | 733 words)

For @jegulus-microfic prompt: Miracle

CW: depresive episode

Most of his life James spent running from the tide. It’s the law of nature. It will come inevitably. But maybe if he runs fast enough this time he will escape. It’s tricky with a tide. You don’t notice it until it’s reaching you. It creeps up on you while you are resting and enjoying a nice day. And suddenly it’s too late to escape.

James can feel the sadness washing over his body in waves. Slowly. Without notice. He is just more tired he says. He just has to sleep more. He is not hungry lately. But that’s alright, maybe tomorrow the lunch will be tastier. The time of the day stretches with boredom. James just has to find a new hobby.

He knows the tide is here when his smile starts to hurt instead. It takes an effort to lift the corners of his lips and not let the tears slip during the process. He does it anyway not to worry his friends. The more he smiles the more he is hurting inside. His laughter is too loud and too intentional. He has to start deciding when to laugh so it looks natural.

He knows the tide will catch up to him when everything stops making sense. The world, his life, any decision he ever made. He can’t find any meaning. Not with the loneliness that surrounds him. He doesn’t want to be around people because they instantly suck the little energy he has. And he needs the energy to hold on. To keep breathing. To collect it so he can take a shower or clean his teeth. It’s the moment when it would take a miracle for him to get out of bed. When he wants nothing more than to leave. Because this room is too suffocating. Just pack his stuff and start walking. They would be better without him anyway. He doesn’t. As he lays on the bed, he dreams about leaving, about happiness he used to have but feels fake now, about the air not being so heavy. He wonders when it got so heavy.

“Jamie?” Regulus asks as he sits on the side of the bed worry written all over his face. James told him about the tide. How it always catches him in the end. And he did try to run, for Regulus. But he didn’t run fast enough. He never does.

“Hi,” James whispers. His voice sounds wrong. He realised he barely said a few words in the last three days. Regulus is here and James is hurting, because he didn’t manage to give him the world he’d promised.

“I… James, what can I do?” Regulus asks reaching for James who doesn’t take the boy’s hand. Defended Regulus places his hand on the blanket covering James’ shoulder.

It takes a long time for James to answer. His brain is just not working properly. “I’m just tired, Reg.”

“Tired of what?”

“Running,” James admits, and he knows it doesn’t make sense to Regulus. He doesn’t try explaining. “Reg, you should go.”

“You want me gone?” Regulus asks without standing up.

“I just want you happy and not wasting your time here. So go and do something you truly want to do.” James says curling up more under the blanket. He expected Regulus to leave. Instead, the boy climbs to the bed right behind James, wrapping his arms around him.

“What are you doing?” James breathes out trying to ignore the pain in his chest.

“Doing what I truly want to do. And that’s being here with you. I will find a way to help you more, but until then I will just be here.” James doesn’t say anything. He lets Regulus hold him, swiping his fingers through James' tangled hair, whispering in his ear.

The thing is when the tide catches up on you, you have to hold your breath and try to swim to the surface. It’s hard work and his body is aching from exhaustion. He doesn’t even know if he is swimming in the right direction or how far the surface is. The question is: Does he have enough oxygen to make it? He is not sure. He tries anyway. For Regulus, Sirius, Peter and Remus. For his parents. Never for himself. But it’s okay, he is used to it. You’ll get used to it after a lifetime of racing the tide.

[vomits0cutely]

Regulus: does she make you laugh?

James: she doesn’t make me cry.

[meakajamespotter]

Marauders Fanfiction (Jegulus because we like sadness)

After Regulu's death, Sirius finds Reg's diary, where he writes about how he secretly dated James but he obliviated him as soon as he received the Dark Mark, in order not to destroy him. They were together for a year and a half, loving each other madly. After reading one of the letters James had written to Reg, Sirius decides to give everything to James. James then relives an entire part of his life that he has no memory of, but somehow still misses.

Title: Unsaid

(I wrote this btw)

It's gay, and sad

[anika-winchester]

Jegulus when James is sad and regulus just holds him

[fonkeloog]

All is Fair in Love and War

Chapter 13! It's a short one, but I need someone to give James a hug cause he's not having a great time....

Teaser and link below the cut!

James feel like he should know how to handle the loss of a long-term friend. After all, he's been through this before

[moonyswarmsweaters]

James, married: *giggles behind blanket* so who do u have a crush on?

Regulus, his husband of 10 years: oh for fuck sake

[lustemotions]

JAMES' DIARY! P.1

James’ diary a year after he broke up with Regulus.

“I can’t let you go.

I did it, physically, but after a long year I can still touch the void in the middle of my heart after you left me behind.

Sometimes I think about you, and it still hurts.

It hurts your memory and it hurts that I don’t remember who I was before you had me.

I cried too many times because of you. And I don’t think the pain or the fear will leave me until you come and take them back.

I don’t know what to do with myself, feeling like a body with no heart.

Why do I keep missing you if we were never happy?”