#sam as the crazy ex

[shorthaltsjester]

Laura Bailey & Matthew Mercer - “Critical Role Campaign 1: The Echo Tree” // Heather Havrilesky - “I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life” // Laura Bailey - “Critical Role Campaign 1: A Bard’s Lament” // Marya Hombacher - “Waiting: A Nonbeliever’s Higher Power” // Laura Bailey - “Campaign 1 Episode 85 and 86 | Talks Machina” // Stephen Levine - “The Most Important Part” // The Legend of Vox Machina - “Shadows at the Gates” // Brene Brown - “Daring Great” // Rachel Bloom - “No One Else Is Singing My Song” // Laura Bailey & Sam Riegel - “Critical Role Campaign 1: A Bard’s Lament”

[comingupforblair]

Quinn: What is wrong with you?!

Sam: Off the top of my head? I’d say low self-esteem, a lack of maternal affection and a genetic predisposition for anxiety and depression.

[nocakesformissedith]

Euphoria + Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2/?)

[musical-hunger-games]

[steppesliver]

early season 5 dean is kinda a mother the way he will do anything for sam but have empathy for him

[beedreamscape]

Why I say that I'm taking a break from watching the campaign, bc I may seem normal, but I go back to exu calamity first episode semi-regularly just to watch the Herald's Tome broadcast and leave

[judiths-sequence]

Making a new account on yet another website. I'll make one rule: I'd better not see Lin-Sam anywhere on this page. He always seems to find all my socials and I don't like it.

[askseriousrainbow]

The second half of the Top 100! We're getting close to number 1. This is numbers 50-41.

Link to part 1. Link to part 2. Link to part 3. Link to part 4. Link to part 5. Link to part 7. Link to part 8. Link to part 9. Link to part 10.

50. TMNT: Shredder's Revenge

Beat-em-ups are fun, and this one is one of the best, in my opinion. The game has 6-player co-op, 7 playable characters, and many levels of pure beat-em-up bliss. I've enjoyed my time with it, and the story is great. Not to mention, the OG Turtle voices are great.

49. The Plutonia Experiment

Yes. Just Plutonia on its own. TNT: Evilution is boring. Plutonia got Dario Casali a job at Valve. Sure, it's harder than DOOM II, but I do love the little tricks it uses, which for the most part work better than DOOM II's tricks. But it's lower because there is a barrier to entry. (TWO Arch-Viles in the first friggin' map? On HURT ME PLENTY?!) It's infamous for Go 2 It, though. Good luck, Doom Slayer, you'll need it.

48. Team Fortress 2

Alright. I was originally considering this to be in the top 10 because of how many hours played and friendships were made because of TF2, but I can't justify it in this list. I still love TF2 and it's my second-most played game on Steam, but I don't play it often these days.

47. Hitman Blood Money

Agent 47's fourth outing is easily one of his best, and has been the inspiration for the style of the World of Assassination trilogy among other things. The stealth is fantastic and even though you shouldn't go for combat, it's not bad. The way to make things look like an accident greatly vary the game.

46. Serious Sam 3: BFE

I love Serious Sam 3, it's the game that introduced the Devastator weapon to the Serious Sam arsenal. While the return to Egypt can be disappointing for some, but I actually enjoy it. I usually have my game put on “Vivid” color mode. The boss battle at the end of the game is enjoyable as well. JETPACK!

45. Deus Ex

You know that gag that says every time you mention Deus Ex, someone reinstalls it? It's totally true. Deus Ex is a game of choices, you can choose to be pacifist or go in guns blazing, and you really don't know who to trust. It's a creative thriller and it's one of the best.

44. Crazy Taxi

YA YA YA YA YA! Crazy Taxi is just one of those arcade games that's just fun. It's you, your cab, your fares, and a big open map. You're encouraged to drive recklessly, but still not run into things, to raise your fare.

43. You Don't Know Jack: Full Stream

The third version of YDKJ in the modern era, Full Stream fixes what was wrong with YDKJ 2015, makes it more accessible to people, makes Screws feel more important, remakes the Jack Attack to fit with the “device as controllers” mechanic, and just feels like a tighter YDKJ game.

42. SimCity 3000 Unlimited

I like 3000 more than 2000, because its advisors are actually characters that guide you into the right way of governing your city, the addition of garbage and neighbor deals, the refinement of how to build zones, the addition of farms, just EVERYTHING. I built more successful cities in 3000 than in 2000, so I think that has something to do with it.

41. Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri

More than just “Civilization IN SPACE!”, Alpha Centauri took the Civ formula, tweaked it, added some hard science-fiction, created diverse factions with different goals, made it plausible, and just went to town. This is how you create a spiritual successor to a game.

Look forward to part 7! :D

Link to part 1. Link to part 2. Link to part 3. Link to part 4. Link to part 5. Link to part 7. Link to part 8. Link to part 9. Link to part 10.

[st4rshiptr00per]

.

[youchangedmedestiel]

Crazy ex-girlfriend x Supernatural

My crazy thing of the day is that I listened to Crazy ex-grilfriend songs and thought: who could sing that in Supernatural?

So there it goes:

DEAN:

“I’m just a girl in love” is so Dean. 

“You Stupid Bitch” is Dean hating himself (that could be Cas too I guess).

“Angry Mad aka Josh's Angry Dance” that one is obviously Dean.  

“Getting’ bi” yeah well that one is even more obvious.

SAM and DEAN:

“Face your fears” because that’s just how Sam and Dean roll and they don’t really have any other choice.

“I have friends” this is Sam and Dean trying to convince themselves especially in early seasons.

SAM, CAS and DEAN:

“Friendtopia” is kind of the pep talk Sam, Cas and Dean say to themselves before preventing another apocalypse.

CAS AND DEAN:

“Dear Joshua Felix Chan” but more like “Dear Dean Winchester” sang by Cas (it works in reverse too tbh).

“Romantic moments” that’s Dean because Cas is such a clueless little angel.  

“Horny Angry Tango” it’s Cas and Dean during their usual bickering (like in episode 12x10 “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” just to name one).

“You Go First” is Dean and Cas during breakup arc or divorce arc, your choice.

“It Was a Shit Show” would have been funny instead of Cas’s confession scene in the dungeon, less heart crusher, less soul destroyer you know.

“The Group Mind Has Decided You're In Love” is, well, it’s us with Destiel, we haven't decided it because it's there of course, but it's funny (plus they are dressed as cowboys during the song so duh!)

OTHER CHARACTERS:

“So Maternal” that’s Jody taking everyone home and raising them.

“I’m the villain in my own story” is soooo Crowley, that one is just perfect for him.

“I’m a good person” is kind of Lucifer trying to convince Team Free Will they can work together and should trust him.

BONUS:

“The Math of Love triangles” is Dean "stuck" in Purgatory with Cas and Benny.

“Oh My God I Think I Like You” is Dean about Cas ruining him.

I didn’t think it would be that long actually, but it was fun to do. Maybe there is more that can be applied, feel free to add if I missed them.

Also, now, I want to see them singing those songs with some change in the lyrics to fit better, because I can picture it so easily. Yeah, I want to see that on my screen. Why did I do that?

(If you haven't watched Crazy ex-girlfriend, I recommand it. Weirdly it has nothing to do with Supernatural but even more weirdly lots of songs work for the SPN characters.)

[simplyholl]

The Newlywed Game

Summary: You’re forced to play The Newlywed Game with your ex situationship.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F. Reader

Warnings: Angst. Smuttish, but not my usual descriptive smut. 18+ Only. Minors DNI.

See my Masterlist here

“I can’t.” That’s all the explanation you got when Bucky ended your situationship. You were friends with benefits for almost a year. The only rule he had was don’t fall in love. He had too much baggage and he never wanted a family. He didn’t want anyone to depend on him.

You couldn’t blame him, he was traumatized by Hydra. Trapped inside his own body for decades, he was afraid it could happen again. You jumped in head first with him anyways. You were in his bed after every mission, every meeting, every day. You basically lived in his room, not that he would ever admit that. Then one rainy afternoon, you knocked on his door like always. Except this time, he didn’t pull you into his warm embrace.

He moved out of the way so you could come in, and immediately you knew something was wrong. You reached for him, ready to console him, desperate for his touch. He had just finished a mission with Sam and he’d been gone for two weeks. You missed him, and he was usually so excited to see you.

When you placed your hand on his cheek, rubbing the scruff that had grown while he was gone, he wrapped his fingers around your wrist removing it. “I can’t do this anymore.” His voice was so low you could barely understand. Your eyes narrowed at his words. “Have I done something wrong?”

“This has gone on for longer than it should have. I can’t let it anymore.” Your throat tightens, but you refuse to cry in front of him. You walked out and your relationship with him was never the same. You didn’t hang out anymore.

When you were alone, he would leave. He didn’t sit beside you during the Friday night movie. He didn’t choose you for his partner on game night. The other Avengers didn’t know for sure that you were hooking up. You hid it pretty well. They had their suspicions, but neither of you ever confirmed it.

Tony called everyone to the back yard. “What’s all this?” Steve asks, pointing to the stage he had set up. “It’s my anniversary tomorrow and Pepper said she always wanted to play the Newlywed Game. So I had this built so we could play.”

“That’s great, Tony. But who are you all going to play with? There’s four set up’s and only two couples.” Steve gestures to Wanda and Vision. “Thought about that and Cap, you and Natasha are going to play and….” He looks at the whole team, everyone looking in different directions trying not to make eye contact. Except for Sharon, who hung around a lot lately. She was getting closer to Bucky, obviously wanting Tony to choose them. You roll your eyes. “Barnes and Y/N. There now we have all our couples. I’m going to go get Pep, you guys take your spots.”

You look at Bucky,but he’s busy talking to Steve about how ridiculous it is. You hear Sharon agree that he should have chosen someone else. When Pepper comes in, she excitedly claps her hands together. She points to the other teams, “You’re going down!” She laughs, but you can’t help but protest, “This is rigged! You guys and Wanda and Vision are the only real couples!! How is anyone else supposed to win?”

Tony shoots you a death glare but answers, “Cap and Natasha have definitely bumped uglies before. And you and Barnes are close friends. I thought that would make it more fair. But, I do expect to win.” You cross your arms, but accept his answer. Bucky finally looks at you, but it’s not friendly.

Sam comes out, wearing a suit Tony made him wear to host. “I’ll explain the rules. You all have a whiteboard, marker, and eraser. I will ask a question and you will write your answer on your boards. If your answer matches your partner’s you get a point. I’ll eliminate one couple each round until the final tie breaker.”

You take a deep breath. This is hell. But, you do know Bucky better than anyone, so as long as he didn’t ask any crazy questions, you would be fine. “First question. Where is the craziest place you and your partner have had sex?” You freeze. Of course Stark had these wild questions. If you both answered the same, everyone would know that you had hooked up.

You think about lying, but decide the ball should be in Bucky’s court. You’ll answer correctly, and if he doesn’t you’ll know he doesn’t want anyone to know. You quickly scribble your answer, waiting on Sam to call on you. Tony’s answer is Steve’s room and Pepper’s matched. Everyone laughed while Steve said Tony has to pay for his room to be deep cleaned.

Wanda and Vision both answer “in the air.” Natasha and Steve said a table in the meeting room. You turn your board to reveal your answer and Bucky shows his. You look and see that he has answered correctly. “The quinjet?! Damn y’all are nasty!” Sam laughs.

You’re taken back to that moment. You, Bucky, and Bruce were on your way back from a mission. Bruce was driving the quinjet, but activated the mode Tony installed for breaks. As soon as he started snoring, Bucky led you to the bathroom. He took you against the wall, metal hand across your mouth to stifle your moans. It was one of the hottest things you’d ever done. Your suit clung to you in the worst ways after that. His cum dripping down your legs, it was nearly impossible to take off.

The others look at each other in surprise. Scott yells “I told you they were hooking up. No one believed me!” Sharon looks at Bucky so harshly that if looks could kill, he’d be dead. He just shrugs his shoulders. Of course, he would be hooking up with her. Why wouldn’t he? She was pretty and it had been three months since he ended things with you.

The next question was “Who hogs the covers more?” Everyone got it right except for Steve and Natasha. She said that wasn’t a fair question because they never actually slept when they were together. The round continued with four more questions. At the end, Steve and Natasha were eliminated because they had the least amount of points. The rest of you were tied.

“What is your partner’s pet name for you?” Sam asks. That’s easy, “doll”, you write. When you reveal your answers, Sharon looks furious. That must be what he calls her too. It stings, thinking of them together. You don’t have time to dwell on it before Sam asks the next question. “What is the highest number of orgasms your partner has given you in one night?” Your eyes widen, you know the answer, but you don’t know if he will remember.

Tony and Pepper answer three, Tony grins like the cocky asshole he is. Vision and Wanda answer two. Bucky raises his board, “Six?!” Sam shouts, “How were you guys fucking this much and nobody knew?” He laughs. The round surprisingly ends with Wanda and Vision getting eliminated.

But you’re busy thinking about that night. Bucky’s head between your thighs for hours. He barely came up for breath. You were sure he would smother, but he insisted. He didn’t stop until the sheets were soaked, your legs were shaking so hard, you’d immediately fall if you tried to stand up.

He had you screaming his name all night. When he finally started fucking you, he took his time, pulling another orgasm out of you before going back down for another taste. He finally came with you on top. He had to lift your limp body on him, using you like a sex doll. You couldn’t move if you needed too. It was the best sex you’d ever had.

“It’s time for the tie breaker question. Answers don’t have to match, the crowd will vote on the most romantic answers.” Sam states. “When did you know you were in love?” Tony and Pepper immediately begin writing. You’re certain you’re going to lose this one. Bucky was never in love with you. You write your answer, deciding to answer truthfully.

Tony and Pepper’s answers make you tear up, they are so in love. You can only hope you’ll find that one day. You and Bucky reveal your boards at the same time. You glance at his, his answer knocks the breath out of your lungs because it matches yours. The Avenger’s Barbecue. You lock eyes, his gaze softens as he reads your answer.

You’ll never forget such a pivotal moment in your life. All of the Avengers and Shield agents’ friends and family were invited to play games, eat, and have a good time. Emily, who helped coordinate your missions brought her husband and three young children. A baby girl, a two year old boy, and a five year old girl. The children were drawn to Bucky. The two older children swung from his metal arm while he held the baby with his other one.

The image made your ovaries explode. You couldn’t help imagining how he would be if you had kids. He laughed as they asked him a thousand questions, playing on him like a jungle gym. You knew without a doubt, you were in love.

Bucky took a deep breath when he read your answer. Why was it the same as his? Did you know? Was it a prank you were playing on him? Emily’s children were entranced with you from the moment they met you. He couldn’t blame them, he felt the same. They had played with him for an hour before the food was ready. When Tony told everyone to make a plate, you offered to watch the kids while she and her husband got their food.

Bucky watched as you comforted the crying infant. The two older children sat beside you while you read from a book the girl got from their bag. Bucky knew he was screwed. He could see a life like this so clearly. Your belly round with his baby, while you tended to your other children. He didn’t want to admit how badly he wanted that. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks. He was in love with you.

That night he made love to you, it was softer, slower than the other times he touched you. He knew you could tell the difference too. He placed one last kiss to your lips, willing himself to let you go. The next morning, he left for his two week mission with Sam. He convinced himself that it was for the best if he ended things. He didn’t want to hurt you. You might be okay with it now, but years later you would regret it.

You’d realize having the Winter Soldier for a husband wasn’t worth everything you would have to go through. Then Sharon started flirting with him after Steve rejected her. He hadn’t so much as hugged her, but she acted like she was entitled to him.

Everyone voted for Tony and Pepper to win. They were the real couple and it was their anniversary tomorrow. Tony was going to treat everyone to dinner for being such good sports. You got out of there as soon as it was over. You needed a nap before going to dinner. It was all too much for you. How the hell did you and Bucky make it so far in the game? Why did he have the same answer for the last question? You convince yourself that he knew how you felt.

That night changed everything. The sex was different. If you didn’t know better, you’d swear he was making love to you. He had to be messing with your head. Somehow you manage to fall asleep even with your thoughts racing.

You wake up two hours later, just enough time to get ready for dinner. You put on the little black dress Bucky loved. If he wants to play games, bring it on. You apply your perfume when a light knock sounds on your door. You would recognize the knock anywhere. “Come in” you call. Bucky walks in, his tight black t-shirt hugging him in the best ways.

“Hey doll, we need to talk.” You put your earrings in, anger surging through you. “Talk about what? How you were trying to humiliate me up there? How you’re banging Sharon now? There’s nothing to talk about. You should just go.”

“Humiliate you? What about me? How did you know the answer to the last question?” He demands, charging toward you. “I answered it truthfully, James. How did you know my answer?” You ask, hands on your hips. “I answered honestly too.” He confesses, his blue eyes sweeping over the swell of your breasts.

“Stop lying! I don’t see what the point is. We have been over for three months. Why are you doing this?” He shakes his head, “I was telling the truth. I realized I was in love with you when all those kids were sitting in your lap. I could see our life together. And I wanted it, the kids, the white picket fence, the big house, you.”

“Bucky, I wanted all that with you too. Seeing you playing with those kids made me realize it too.” You sigh, feeling relieved to finally get it off your chest. His lips crash into yours, hands moving at lightning speed to remove all of your clothing. You’re under him in seconds, panting against his lips as he rubs himself against you.

Bucky moans as he sinks into you. He’s always known deep down you were made for him, now he has no choice but to accept it. “I’m so in love with you.” He tells you between thrusts. You claw at his back, his confession almost sends you over the edge. “I am so in love with you, Buck.” You kiss him gently. “Say it again.” He smiles, as you get lost in each other.

Tags

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[sourcherryandsprinkles]

Let's play a little game | Ethan Landry x Reader

Summary: You get a phone call from a masked ID when you’re home alone…

Word count: 2k

Warnings: smut, fingering, p + v action, ambiguous consent, home invasion, cheating,

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

You looked at your reflection in the mirror as you brushed your hair, admiring how hot your body looked in those small shorts and cami. The rumors were true, you really looked your best in your early adulthood. You posed, making sure all your curves were in a flattering angle, and sent a picture to your boyfriend. It was a bummer Chad was away in Woodsboro for the weekend when you looked that good.

After exchanging some naughty texts with Chad, you called Tara if she wanted to come over and watch horror movies. The weather had been gloomy and cold all day, which was perfect for the occasion.

‘’If you had called me two hours ago, I would be running over in my pajamas and bringing along my fuzzy blanket, but I may have gotten a call from a certain brunet from my film class and agreed to go on a date…tonight.’’ Tara covered her mouth to stifle her excitement, but you could hear it in her voice.

A smile bloomed on your lips, excited for your friend. ‘’Oh my god! He did?’’

‘’Yes.’’ On the other side of the line, Tara paused, her head full of Tyler. ‘’I’m so nervous. It’s my first date ever.’’

‘’It’ll be okay, T,’’ you reassured her. ‘’And if he turns out to be a jerk, excuse yourself to the bathroom and send me a text. I’ll call you and fake an emergency.’’

Tara promised, then hung up to finish getting ready for her date. She needed to leave before Sam got home and asked a plethora of questions. Maybe she’ll do a full search on Tyler to make sure he’s not a crazy Stab fanatic like her own ex-boyfriend.

You were about to shoot a text to Anika, but your phone rang again. This time, the caller ID was masked.

You answered with a frown.

‘’Hello?’’ a distorted male voice said.

Your frown deepened. ‘’Eh, shouldn’t I be the one saying ‘hello’?’’

‘’Who is this?’’

‘’Who are you trying to reach?’’

‘’I don’t know.’’ There was a short silence, then the man spoke again. ‘’Do you like scary movies?’’

‘’Yeah.’’ You took a body-spray from your vanity desk and spritzed a little on you, smiling when the sweet caramel scent filled the air.

‘’What’s your favorite scary movie?’’

You took a moment to think. ‘’Probably Jennifer’s Body. Does that count? It’s more of a horror comedy, but I’ve watched it a thousand times.’’

The stranger hummed. ‘’The one with the hot chick that eats her best friend’s boyfriend?’’

‘’Yes!’’

‘’Speaking of boyfriend, do you have a boyfriend?’’

‘’Why? You want to ask me out on a date?’’ you joked, fixing the pendant of your necklace that had flipped over.

‘’Maybe.’’

‘’If you want to ask someone out on a date, calling on a masked ID is not the best way. It gives off stalker vibes.’’

‘’I’m not a stalker.’’

‘’How can I know you’re not?’’

‘’If I were a stalker, I would tell you how hard my cock is just from looking at you in those pajamas.’’

You gulped uncomfortably, standing from your vanity chair and going to your window to peer through the curtains to see if anyone was outside. You were on the tenth floor. How would anyone get up there from the outside? It didn’t make sense.

But it was the only window in your bedroom…

‘’I…I’m gonna hang up. I need to take my dog out.’’

It was a lie. You didn’t have a dog, but the stranger on the other end didn’t know that.

‘’Don’t hang up on me!’’ he yelled at you.

You did anyway.

Seconds later, the phone rang again. Fuck.

‘’Why are you calling again?’’ you snapped at the caller, not bothering to check the ID. You knew it was him.

‘’To apologize, of course.’’

‘’Okay. You did. Now bye.’’ You pulled the phone away from your ear, but the man yelled at you.

‘’If you hang up again, I’ll come inside and gut you!’’

The threat was stronger and starting to scare you, but you couldn’t let him know.

‘’You’re bluffing,’’ you said, praying your voice wouldn’t falter. ‘’I’m on a high floor. You can’t get to me.’’

‘’From the outside, no. But who said I’m not already inside.’’

Fear settled in your guts as your phone buzzed with a text message. A picture. Someone in a Ghostface mask standing in your bedroom. He had a knife in his hand and you had a feeling it wasn’t a fake one.

When was this taken? And where was he now?

You searched your vanity for something to use as a weapon. There was a ton of makeup, a few perfume bottles, your hairbrush — all useless. Then your eyes fell on your manicure scissors. You used them a few nights ago to cut a thread from a shirt. They were small but pointy. It could injure your stalker.

Scissors tight in your hand, you stood from your chair and ventured to your living area. It was a very small apartment. The living room and kitchen were merged into the same room and all the lights were off. You turned the main light on, illuminating the whole room, but saw no one.

The curtains were closed. They were tall and thick enough for someone to hide behind.

Putting your fictive big-girl pants on, you walked to the window to check, but jumped and when you heard the distorted voice in your ear.

‘’Let’s play a little game. I say something and you do as I say….or else I’ll use that sharp knife on you. Got it?’’

You gulped and nodded. A part of you wanted to call the cops and signal a home invasion, but if your intruder was already inside, they would never get to you on time. Even at night, New York traffic was a nightmare.

‘’Take those little shorts off. I want to see those lacey panties you have on underneath.’’

You didn’t want to, but you reached for your small dolphin shorts anyway. You weren’t shy with your body, but getting undressed for a stranger to jerk off to you made you stomach churn. Your fingers touched your waistband, about to pull your shorts down, but stopped when you remembered you were not wearing anything under.

‘’I-I'm not wearing any.’’

‘’Don't lie to me. I can see those tiny shorts from here.’’

You looked around the room, trying to figure out where he was hiding. Your bedroom window was already out of the options. Your bed was a box and your closet and the bathroom door were shut. Where the hell was he hiding?

‘’Not the shorts,’’ you corrected. ‘’The panties.’’

‘’Naughty girl.’’

You should be disgusted, but you found yourself blushing — and slightly turned on — at the creepy stranger's words. Was it the Ghostface mask that was suddenly having this effect on you? You did feel a strange liking to the masked killers when you watched horror movies.

‘’Strip.’’

You fumbled to push your dolphin shorts down and out of the way, exposing yourself bare.

‘’Now go back to your room, get on the bed and sit against the pillows.’’

You did as told and leaned back into your pillows, but kept your knees closed. You could sense where this was going. Men loved to watch a girl touch herself. If you look at their internet history, you’ll find a ton of porn videos of women touching themselves.

He tutted you. ‘’Don't try to hide. Spread your legs. I want to see.’’

You knew you shouldn’t part your legs, but your arousal was getting stronger at every instruction. It’s like he had casted a spell on you and you were helpless to disobey him.

God, you should be disgusted with yourself. How could you be turned on by a masked intruder in a Ghostface mask asking you to strip and give him a free view of your intimate parts?

Shutting your subconscious, you parted your legs and exposed yourself, shivering when you felt the cool air of the room.

You heard a groan in your ear. ‘’That’s a beautiful pussy. Show me how wet you are for me.’’

Your free hand slid down your body and to your mound, then lower. You sighed as you reached your folds, spreading them and showing the way your lips glistened with wetness.

‘’Am I wet enough for you, Mr. Ghostface?’’ you asked into the room, sliding your finger up and down your folds a couple of times.

‘’Why don’t you stick a finger inside? Play with yourself for me.’’

A soft moan slipped from your lips as you did, your finger sliding easily. You thrusted in slowly, then out, and repeated. The pace was too slow for your personal liking, but you knew how to tease and turn on a partner. Watching a video of your fingers sinking in and out of yourself, coated with your arousal had made your boyfriend cum in his dorm bed many times.

But let’s not talk about Chad now.

You added a second finger and caught your bottom lip between your teeth when you curled them. You wish you had your pink vibrator for your clit, but your other hand was occupied holding your phone.

‘’Mmh, you’re making me so fucking hard right now.’’

‘’Are you touching yourself to the sight of me, Mr. Ghostface?’’ you asked, bringing your thumb to your clit and rubbing.

A distorted whimper came from the other side of the line. He was.

The sensations from your touches were sending fuzzy tingles from your neck to your dripping pussy, but it wasn’t enough. You needed more.

‘’Is that all you’re going to do? Are you going to just watch me fuck myself for your own pleasure like a selfish asshole…or are you going to come and fuck me?’’

The line went dead and all the lights went off, sending chills down your spine. You removed your fingers, unsure if this was part of the game or not.

‘’Hello?’’ you called into the darkness of your bedroom. ‘’Is someone there?’’

It was stupid to ask, having seen enough horror movies to know what happens to characters who ask that very question.

The light returned with a static noise and you jumped when seeing a tall Ghostface figure standing at the end of your bed, watching you intently. He pounced on your bed like a lion on his prey, grabbing you by the ankles and pulling you toward him.

A deafening scream left your throat, thinking he was going to kill you. Instead, he parted your thighs and lifted his robe, his pants already down to his thighs and his hard cock out. He wasted no time, thrusting himself between your wet folds and splitting your cunt open as you moaned out loud.

‘’You like being filled with my cock, uh? You unfaithful little whore!’’ the distorted voice said, grabbing your hips and pounding into you. ‘’Getting fucked by someone else while her boyfrined is away in California.’’

Unfortunately, you couldn't deny it. This cock felt fucking amazing.

You pushed all thoughts of Chad to the back of your head. You’ll figure this out later.

Right now, all you wanted to focus on was the man between your legs.

The sounds that rang from your throat were nothing short of obscene, mouth hanging open helplessly while he wrecked your pussy, his cock slick with the evidence of your arousal. You clawed at your sheets, your back arching from the bed from the intense pleasure filling your whole body.

Moans and grunts mixed with wheezings came from underneath the mask. Breathing must not be easy under the rubber mask. You reached out and took it off, gasping in shock when seeing who was underneath.

Ethan?!

You opened your mouth to speak, but he threw your legs over his shoulders and you cried out at the change of angle, not caring that your boyfriend’s roommate was fucking you.

—

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[ian0key]

SAM/SASHA AND ALICE/TIM????

TMAGP ep 1-2 Spoilers!! (And TMA Spoilers!)

Do you realize how similar Alice and Sam are to Tim and Sasha?

Many of you talked about Alice being fun, carefree and the comic relief, like Tim in the first season.

But what happens if we look deeper? I start with Alice and Tim because I think they are the most obvious

-Alice does not have "professional respect" for either Gwen or Lena.

Just like what happened between Tim and Jon. But none of them go so far as to "completely disrespect them."(at least S1 Tim).

-Alice has a younger brother who she apparently cares a lot about, just like Tim was with Danny. Besides, (this is my theory), but the way they introduced Alice's brother, I get the feeling that his fate won't be very different from poor Danny's.

-They know more than they say, Alice clearly knows more than she tells Sam,Alice has been working for the government for at least 4 years, and the only time she acted seriously was to tell Sam that he shouldn't get too involved in the cases, because she saw people go crazy because of it.

Something similar happened with Tim in the first seasons, he knew that the Fears were real, he knew things about the stranger, he was looking for revenge..

And now on to the similarities between Sam and Sasha.

-They were both overqualified for their position, Lena told Sam that the job he applied for was too low for his level, but he didn't care,on the other hand ,Sasha must have been The Archivist, Gerdtrud knew this, that's why her warning notes were made for her, but Elias found out after Killing Gerdtrud and left Sasha as assistant and put Jon as The Archivist..

-Sam is calm, he follows Alice's games but is professional towards his colleagues, Just like the little we saw of Sasha, She treated Jon quite well even though at the time Jon was a bit... very Shitty.

That's why Jon trusted her so much.

-Curiosity , Sam asked a lot of questions throughout the first 2 chapters, and when he didn't get answers he started investigating on his own. When Sasha met Michael, she wanted answer,without caring about the danger.

Also, That could have been a foreshadowing that Sam will be connected to the Eye of this reality???.

- Both of their names start with "SA" but that's not very important /j

And finally, we analyze Alice and Sam as a duo and the parallels they have with Tim and Sasha.The two of them complement each other perfectly, they play each other's games and we feel their connection.

Besides Alice and Sam are exes (although I think it's more of a reference to Georgie and Jon) Sasha and Tim always had an "almost something?????".like we heard in the fifth season..

I don't know, at some point I felt like I was listening to the reincarnations of the chaotic Archives duo , you know what I mean?

(English is not my first language, please let me know if I have any spelling mistakes🙏)

[yameoto]

NEW BOT ALERT! — new ex babysitter!sam carpenter bot for uh. health and wealth purposes. the concept was inspired by this excellent oneshot that drives me apeshit wild.

(ex) babysitter!sam headcanons.. because i’m doin those, now. expect a lot more to come.

✗ warnings ; large age gap (sam 26, reader 18-19), nsfw at bottom. dom/sub.

an absolute sucker for you. like when you were little and you wanted something— like an extra helping of dessert or to ditch out on homework: all you had to do was pout and blink up at her with those big, pleading doe eyes and she'd cave immediately. two seconds flat, easy. now? that still hasn't changed. you have her wrapped around your finger with a single look and it drives her crazy.

would spoil you to PIECES. ofc when u she used to babysit you she would pay for everything, but even now that you're a grown adult with an (albeit low-paying) part-time job, she'd find any excuse to spoil you. just.. coming home with random gifts at any point of the week. like it could be 4pm on a thurday afternoon and she could come up behind you like "baby, you know those headphones you really wanted..? well.."

or jst going out shopping with her and you wouldnt even have to ask for her to pay because she'd be striding to the counter with her card out, already.

definitely calling you "princess". i mean, that's what you are, right? you always have been, always will.

makes her knees weak when you call her "sammy" . you'd exclusively call her it when you were a kid and despite all efforts to prevent this, now, still makes her chest collapse when you say it. and when u add the cheeky little conjunction my, in front of it? oh, boy. just know you're getting more than a good night's kiss, tonight.

she loves it when you whine or beg her for anything. like.. loves.

she just likes taking care of you in general, so anytime you go to her for anything it makes her happy which is kind of fucking adorable. but she finds you coming to her for help adorable, too, so.. win-win?

can never stay mad at you. even on days where u make it your life's mission to annoy her (its your job to keep her on her toes!) she legitimately just.. can't — and believe her, she's tried. stuck in a perpetual state of mild exasperation.

veryyy protective nd possessive . but in more subtle manners like very adamantly refusing to let you walk on the side of pavement next to the road. or always having either an arm wound around your waist or your shoulders or interlocking your fingers — anything that keeps you safe and snug by her side. she’s just so used to the feeling of protecting u and she kinda just never wants it to stop.

..nsfw!

uses the fact she used to babysit you for EVIL. in stupid ways like smirking and asking if you want her to "tuck you in" before bed, except she's straddling your chest and gently prising your mouth open with her thumb and 'tucking you in' means 'choking on her cock'.

obsessed with bouncing you on her lap. u guys cld be doing something completely innocent, like watching tv with the whole gang in the room and she'll pull u onto her lap and slowly start to rock you on her thigh, like how u used to when u were a kid. except this time, you're both grown up and her knee's sliding upwards and pressing against your cunt and oh. whispering "shh," in your ear as she continues to grind her knee up your skirt, fucking purring at all the pretty little noises you make.

actively enjoys punishing you when you get too bratty. she finds your whines adorable, of course, but if she's feeling too grouchy she's not above replacing those complaints in your mouth with you know — something more substantial.

adores praising you and calling you endearments during sex. calling you a sweet little thing and whispering soft, reverential promises into your ear as she absolutely ruins you.

cups your jaw and forces you to look at her when you suck her off. utterly obsessed with that wide, glazed-over look in your eyes whenever you're on your knees for her. the way your adorable little puppy eyes go all glassy nd sparkly w tears when she rams her hips forward and makes you sputter. cradling the back of your head and holding you there as she thrusts, cooing sweet nothings while she bruises the back of her your throat.

[anonymityisfunwriter]

love is embarrassing

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

a.n. i can't be blamed for this. i swear, this is the last part. (but like, i also reserve the right to do another one if the mood strikes). i just have so much fun writing these two.

bad idea right? | get him back! | love is embarrassing

you loved romance. you loved reading it. you loved watching a good rom com. you loved the idea of love.

you just wish someone would have told you how embarrassing it all was. love is embarrassing. plain and simple. it’s humiliating. and no movie, no book, no past relationship ever prepared you for how much you were willing to embarrass yourself for bucky barnes.

no one prepared you for hearing that tired sigh and watching your friends roll their eyes. every single time without fail.

“we broke up.”

“we’re back together.”

“we’re just keeping it casual.”

“i love him.”

“i hate him.”

bucky barnes had literally driven you to the brink of madness. then reeled you back in. then pushed you head first over the cliff. and as much as you wanted to hate him for it, you know you've done the exact same thing to him too.

something about the two of you, whether together or broken up, turned to usually level headed, composed agents into immature, borderline insane people.

dignity, both yours and his, was no longer a consideration in your relationship.

it was simple, neither of you had any left.

not when you kept falling into each other's beds and arms over and over again.

and in spite of all of this, in spite of all the embarrassment, the moment bucky texts you and asks you to meet him for a coffee, you agree - but only after making him wait several hours for a simple 'okay'.

here you sit before him, sipping on your tea, wondering where the hell your pride went. you were sure you had it right before bucky texted you.

bucky lets out a deep sigh, his hands anxiously rubbing together. "I just - i thought that maybe we should talk. alone. and i didn't want you to think that i was just trying to -"

"hook up?"

he nods, his lips pressed together, "exactly."

"it's not like everyone doesn't already know what's going on between us."

he immediately looks apologetic. you hate that. you hate that deep down, bucky barnes is actually a really good person, just not a great ex-boyfriend.

the real kicker was that he was actually a really great boyfriend, at least, from what you remember. "i should've told you that sam and steve found out."

your shoulders slump in defeat as you acquiesce, "and i should've told you that natasha and wanda found out."

his mouth twists. "so everyone knows, huh?"

"pretty much... does that surprise you?"

"i mean, i guess not. it's not like we were subtle about any of it."

you playfully snort, "no, i guess we weren't."

"why did we break up?"

"you don't remember that huge fight we had?"

"no, i remember that. i remember being really pissed off. i remember saying things that i didn't mean. i just can't remember why i didn't go after you. i can't remember why you didn't come back. and i can't remember why we gave up so easily."

the crazy thing was you could hardly remember what the fight was about. his ego. your temper. conflicting work schedules. the reality was you both blew up that night. "i don't remember either."

"why the hell are we still broken up?"

pride, mostly.

it was always the ugly head that reared itself in your relationship.

you were too proud to admit that you were wrong.

he was too proud to admit that he was wrong.

you were both too proud to be the first one to lay your armor down.

"it’s just..." you start, shaking your head and immediately backtracking, "forget it."

"it’s clearly something," bucky urges.

"it’s embarrassing."

"i promise i won’t give you shit about whatever you say."

"no, bucky, it’s embarrassing..."

his jaw sets to the side, his teeth clicking together. "us? we’re embarrassing? you’re embarrassed to be with me?"

"no! yes! no - it’s - this whole back and forth. if i get back together with you now - which i'm not saying i will - what does that say about me?"

he scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest. "i didn't realize you cared that much about what other people thought of you."

"don't patronize me," you sneer. "you've embarrassed the shit out of me over and over again. forgive me for having some self respect."

"i think i'm falling in love with him," you confess.

"i'm so happy for you!" wanda squeals.

"barnes!" natasha greets him. "we were just talking about you two, so much for being a lone wolf, huh?"

bucky wraps an arm around you, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. he scoffs, "nothing's changed. we're just keeping it casual."

"i've embarassed you?" bucky guffaws. "you're not exactly innocent in this either."

"me?" you gasp. "what the hell did i do to you?"

"i think she's the one," bucky wistfully admits.

sam rolls his eyes. "you've been dating like a month."

"i'm not seeing your point."

"hey, sam," you greet him, making a point to glare at bucky as you pass the two of them on the way to the bar.

"oh shit," sam chuckles. "someone's in trouble."

"what? no i'm not - " bucky's words are cut off by the sight of you flipping him off as you walk away. "i stand corrected."

"you've done plenty," bucky grunts.

"and now, now, all i hear now is everyone's opinion of what they think i should do!" you exclaim. "do you know how humiliating it is to have everyone's opinions of whether or not i should be with you?"

“you’ll never get over him if you’re still under him, if you get what i mean,” nat quips.

you roll your eyes. “you have the subtlety of a brick wall.”

"you were the one that was all over sam at the bar the other night!" he accuses.

"and you were flirting with some random stranger in front of all of our friends!" you shoot back.

"people are staring," bucky points out.

you hang your head. great, you've embarrassed yourself once again in this back and forth with bucky. "i'm just tired of hearing what everyone thinks about this back and forth."

"but what do you think?" he emphasizes. "because, honestly, i'll embarrass myself over and over again if it means i could have you back. just name a time and a place and i'll be there." you're taken aback by bucky's offer. he was a proud man. there was no denying that. and maybe it's the fact that there's nothing but sincerity gleaming in his eyes or the fact that he's willing to give up something he values so much for you. maybe romance isn't dead after all. "or maybe, maybe we just stop. we stop this back and forth. we stop acting like kids, stop trying to get back at each other. we just... love each other without worrying about what everyone else thinks."

"oh fuck," you hiss under your breath as the realization hits you.

"what?"

you don't say anything. you just realized that you're about to embarrass yourself one last time for bucky barnes.

who cares? after all, love is embarrassing.

Bucky Barnes Masterlist AnonymityIsFun Masterlist

As always, let me know what you think! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💛

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[jazzsonly]

ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴍᴇ (2)

pairing(s): sam carpenter x g!p!stem!reader

warning(s): smut. p in v. handjob. cheating. cuming inside. probably the worst thing you ever read omg.

summary: part one.

────────✯────────

you don’t know why you were standing here, standing at your ex-girlfriend’s apartment door at midnight while you’re sulking girlfriend was at home.

apart of you felt like shit, you knew you shouldn’t have kissed sam. even if it were for a stupid game. even if amber gave you permission. because the whole way home amber shot smart comments but denied she was bothered.

in her own words, “no baby, i’m not bothered i watched my girlfriend get a boner from her ex.”

you wanted to say how could she be mad when she gave you permission but it wasn’t worth the argument and nonetheless you did feel terrible. you couldn’t imagine the insecurity you’d sparked up in the girl.

while you had these feelings, you’re ones for sam overpowered them. you tried to sleep (on the couch because amber didn’t want to be near you.) but you couldn’t. you had this dying, searing need to see sam, to touch sam.

you lift your hand to hesitantly knock but even before you could the door swung open, revealing sam clad in a robe and wet hair.

“come in.” a stupid smirk plastered on her pink lips while she stepped aside, giving you space in the door. she leads you to her room.

“i thought i’d have to wait at least a week before you came…but you missed me more than i thought.”

you squint your eyes at the girl, hating that she were right. you both underestimated how much you missed her.

“how’d you even know i was here?”

she takes a seat on her bed, crossing her legs and leaning back on her hands. “i seen your car from my window.”

“so, how’s your girlfriend? she mad?”

you scoff, still having distaste for her character of mind games. “of course she is, sam. that’s fucked up what you did.”

“mhm. did she fuck you good? because i’m sure if she did you wouldn’t be here.” the girl bites, not liking your tone with her.

you turn your head to the side, still standing by her door. knowing amber offered to touch but you declined. telling her you didn’t feel right.

but in your mind, you knew you wanted it to be sam to do you. only she could do you right.

“oh,” she laughs. “she didn’t fuck you at all. that’s why you’re here.”

sam was far too amused.

she was amused and blissful. this was her way and chance to get you back, to get you away from the rigid hands of amber. she would never admit it but underneath all her mind games and façade she missed you like crazy.

you were the only one to put up with her, let alone handle her.

“come here.” your eyes flick to her and back down to the floor, standing in place.

“y/n, come here.” venom in her word this time, and you hesitantly comply. taking a seat next her body.

“untie my rob.” you bite your lip, it was too late to go back now.

you bring your finger tips to the tie of the black silk rob, that hugged her body so right in your eyes. and with the tie undone the seem of her boobs showed.

glints pops in your eyes at the sight.

“mhm, good.” she leans off her hands, placing one on your thigh, her boobs fully showing now.

your skin felt hot, maybe a pierce of sweat by the way she was in your proximity. her brown orbs pouring seduction and need into yours. your orbs having the same amount of lust but a hint of nerves.

sam could see right through your nerves, she could tell there was beating in your heart telling you it’s wrong to do this with your girlfriend’ at home but she didn’t care. she would fix that right up and make you forget amber even existed.

“nobody will ever know,” sam whispered a lie into your lips before sealing it with a truthful kiss.

you pull away at first, looking back to the floor but she tugs on your neck, easily pulling you back in.

there it was. that intoxicating, intense feeling of how much you longed for her.

you hands once again found her waist, just bare this time. you held on so tight, nails slightly causing her sensational pain.

it felt all brand new and old at the same time. you subconsciously moved your lips to her neck, smelling the fresh dove off her skin. she was sexy as ever to you in this moment. it felt like blissful death to have her in your hands this way, and her hands gripping on your thighs. slightly feeling the buldge through your jeans.

as much as sam loved you in control, she loved to be in control even more. she flips the script, sliding her hand up the back of your neck into your hair, she tugs harshly causing you to grunt.

you head held in place, you watch her climb onto your lap. her other hand, pulls on the hem of your hoodie and you get the message. taking it off, leaving you in a beat up vintage michael jackson t-shirt.

sam on the other hand, let’s the silk slide off her arms. leaving her vulnerably exposed.

“god,” you’re shaking breath let out a whisper at the sight.

“i wanna’ ride you.” sam confirms, stepping off to you give area to slide your jeans off.

“your briefs too, y/n.” she scoffs at your horny fogged mind.

this time sam was the one mesmerized at the sight of you.

7 1/2 inches stood tall and rock hard.

she didn’t waste a second climbing back into your lap. she wanted to make sure you were ready, she spit in her hand as a form of lube and strokes you softly.

her eyes so dark, practically black at the way you fell apart in her hands. you head thrown back, light moans and whimpers feel from your lips.

she made sure to caress the tip with her thumb, collecting the pre-cum and stroking down, twisting her hand as well.

“sammy,” you let out and if possible, her eyes grew even darker at the nickname.

she didn’t care if you were ready or not anymore. she needed to have you and oh she did.

she leans up, holding you in place to align herself. she a took a deep breath before coming down on you.

the room filled with both of your moans. if you were falling apart before, you were a mess now.

the way she gushed around you.

she was so tight, and you hate to think it but she was tighter than amber. almost as if she were a perfect fit.

sam places her hand on your abdomen to balance herself as she rotates her hips on you, making sure to precise with her movements so you both can receive maximum pleasure.

“so big,” the carpenter whimpers out, when you push your hips up. she swore she felt you hit spots she didn’t even knew existed.

thank god tara ended up sleeping at mindy’s because from sam’s room through the whole apartment there was nothing but the sounds of slapping, whimpers, and moans.

“fuck, wait, sammy i’m gonna cum.” you pant, snapping your eyes up a the girl.

despite your protest, sam didn’t stop. in fact, it only evoked her more and she moved her hips in way you had never felt before. all you knew was that it brought you closer to climax as it did sam too.

sam felt that pit in her stomach and she knew there was no holding back.

“y/n, fuck.“ she shouted out. (if they didn’t before, the neighbors definitely knew your name now.)

and there was no use for you, once you felt sam’s juices flow all over you, your thick ropes explore her insides.

“oh my,” unintentionally, your hips pushed up at the pleasure.

sam toppled on top of you, allowing her head to fall in your neck. your body was limp, you both only being able to pant for a minute.

“so, is she better than me?”

you wouldn’t say it because you hated to think it, let alone compare.

but no one was better than sam.

──────── well… wrote this while i was at the gym LMAO👩🏽‍💻