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lets-try-some-writing · 6 months

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Successors

Bumblebee knew he was different from the cycle he first began to comprehend the world around him. Where others of his age would play, he observed in silence. Where they screamed, Bumblebee merely allowed a hint of discomfort to emanate in his posture and his Sire would soon come to him. Too quiet, too composed, too quick to learn. But Bumblebee never doubted, nor did he question his Sire.

The others looked at him in concern, but Bumblebee saw no reason to worry about his situation. Why should he? They simply did not understand.

━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙ ━━━━━━━━━━━━ ⊙ ❖ ⊙

Bumblebee's earliest memory was one of a place of darkness and gloom, with many blue optics gazing down on him. He recalled arms and raptorial legs running over him, tending to him from where he resided in a cradle of primordial developmental fluid. It was comforting, peaceful even. The form that loomed above him was safety, it was love, and it was protection. Often he heard songs that resonated with his very core, usually accompanied by those many optics shining through the casing that contained him. That time of his life was hazy and distant, but he never forgot the blue of the optics that observed him.

He recalled his chamber of warmth being cut open and the chill of the cavernous space assaulting him. His first cries echoed in the damp air before he was soothed by servos that were familiar and yet so different from the appendages he was used to touching his place of gestation. He could not see, he could not hear, however he could feel the steady thrum of the powerful being that held him as he was taken from the gloom and to where the wind blew harshly and the air grew dry.

Distant memories, echoes of something that felt right.

The one who held him became a constant in Bumblebee's existence. He was small, weak, and underdeveloped. Instinctually he knew this as his tender cradled him and marched through what he could only assume was dead land. There was no smell of life, no scent of anything moving or mechanical. The sting of what he would come to know as plasma miasma was everywhere, but aside from that, it was simply him and his strangely familiar caretaker. This lasted for a time, but his memories were not very clear regarding all that occurred during that time. All he could say for certain was that when his optics finally achieved full functionality, he knew immediately that his situation was precarious at best.

He was brought to the Autobots in the arms of the one and only Optimus Prime, and for that reason, Bumblebee was quick to learn his place. Instincts told him to act, to do... something violent. But Optimus always knew, and when Bumblebee reached to activate coding hidden within his subsystems on instinct, the Prime would stare down at him with frigid optics, calculating and demanding. Very rarely did he need to say a word, but when Bumblebee was handed off to other mecha to be tended to for a time, Optimus always spoke to him first. Over and over the mantra was repeated whenever he was given to Ratchet for examination or to Jazz to be watched over during Optimus's absence.

"Restrain yourself and blend in. Remain in control and maintain this form. Do not succumb to the hunger and do not question. We must not be discovered so soon."

Bumblebee knew the optics that gazed down upon him, he knew the voice that spoke with the same deep hum that comforted him. Optimus was his Sire, and he would obey. He did not know why nor did he feel the need to seek answers. Even as a sparkling, he could follow the orders of his maker. The hunger that burned within him was pushed down and the urge to escape what was quickly feeling like a too-small shell was overcome. He had his orders, and he refused to disobey. Deep in his spark, he knew death would await him if he failed, and another part of him was quick to come to the conclusion that his Sire could easily to replace him. There was no need for communication for that truth to be revealed. Whatever he and his Sire were, they both were well aware of the unspoken rules.

"Obey or perish."

That was their shared command. Bumblebee obeyed his Sire, and Optimus in turn followed orders that he did not see fit to reveal. Whatever the case, it was none of Bumblebee's concern. When he was with Ratchet, he kept still and quiet, watching and adjusting his behavior to match what he saw around him. His coding and mental state changed, no longer controlled by instinct and instead by the growing persona that was taking root in his processors. From Jazz he learned to be energetic and hopeful, from Ratchet he learned seriousness and duty, from Ironhide he gained strength, from Preceptor knowledge, from Ultra Magnus strategic training... the list went on. Vorns passed by and he played his part. Bumblebee did not question, nor did the Autobots around him comment on his eerie levels of maturity at such a young age. There was a war to be won and no room to consider.

With time, Bumblebee learned to think as those around him did, he acted liked them, spoke like them, and carried himself as any other youngling. And yet despite parading himself as if he were a completely normal Cybertronian, there was forever the nagging sense deep within him that he was something other. The death around him did not bother him. While he did grow angry over the lost lives, the carnage itself had no influence over his mind. Combat came to him naturally, and often he found himself inclined to his denta and claw over blade and blaster. He did not fully understand it when the request to activate dormant coding periodically appeared on his HUD, but whenever he so much as looked at is a klik too long, his Sire almost always appeared by his side in short succession.

"Ignore it. The time has not yet come. Continue to live as you have, you will understand when you are required to."

He obeyed.

There were only a few times where he failed to follow the orders given, and he was always put back in his place. The instincts he was carefully told to ignore occasionally made itself known. Sometimes his jaw ached to unhinge, to widen and expand when he gazed upon the dying calling out for aid. Optimus never failed to cuff him in those instances or even harshly pull on his door wings to return him to reality. Occasionally his plating itched and he had the overwhelming urge to shift, to unfold and escape the confines of that which held him. It was worst on the battlefield when the rush of conflict flooded his processors with sheer euphoria. In such situations, Optimus was always there and ready to beat him into the ground should he fail to follow the order to restrain himself. While rare, there were even times when Bumblebee found himself starting to hoard energon, consuming more than he needed to and scouting out potential safe havens. He did not understand why he did so, but Optimus hauling him deep into the underground portion of the base and locking him up for a few cycles got him out of his strange moods quite quickly.

"There cannot be any more of us right now. Too many will draw attention. There can only be two. A hierarch and an heir."

After such treatment, Ratchet tended to tend to him and gently ask if Bumblebee was safe, if he required removal from Optimus's care. Bumblebee always said no. Ratchet did not understand, he never would. He was a good mech, a kind individual with a gentle spark, and thus he could not even come close to comprehending the unspoken connection Bumblebee had to his Sire. Jazz asked sometimes too, usually when he brought Bumblebee additional energon after his lockups. Ironhide slipped him a map with marked routes to a transport leaving Cybertron for a neutral world a handful of times. Even Ultra Magnus pulled him aside and took extra care to send Bumblebee off on missions that kept him from his Sire for extended periods of time.

They thought they were helping. Bumblebee could see why. Compared to the records of regular sparklings that he read and watched, the treatment Optimus subjected him to was straight up abuse. But of course, that was simply because there was a lack of understanding. It was the way of whatever it was Bumblebee and his Sire were. Their kind, whatever they happened to be, were a race that needed no words, needed no excess emotion. They knew their duty, and thus when Optimus struck him down and dragged him back into place, Bumblebee understood and held no ill will toward his maker. He could see Optimus faced similar treatment from whoever his maker was as well.

"Why are you hurting?"

"I am not externally injured young one."

"No, but inside you ache. I can see it, how you contort yourself to match this image of Cybertronian perfection."

"It is required."

"Why?"

"It is for the same reason you too must keep that shell little one. Our time has not yet come... and it may never arrive."

"What do you mean?"

"It is not your place to understand, such is my duty. I am the first, you are the second. I molded you to perform better than me, to overcome the trials that leave me in agony with minimal discomfort instead."

"You suffer in your frame."

"Yes, but I was the first. I was the test. You are better than I am, perfected and altered as much as I could manage to walk among this people without fear... that is so long as you keep yourself in control."

"Then... when will our time come?"

"When all save for us are dead... or when the time is right to spread unimpeded. These fragile creations are so advanced they have forgotten the core truth, the unity of one shared goal. When this war ends in their extinction or their restoration, we shall rise from their ashes or follow in their shadows."

Bumblebee did not understand, but as his Sire said, it was not his place to. Optimus was a comfort, one that Bumblebee relied on greatly. The Prime was his maker, that much he knew. Thus he dared not question when Optimus spoke to him in the humming song that he knew from his development. Ratchet, Jazz, and the others did not see what Bumblebee saw, nor did they ever witness the affection Optimus gave him in a positive light. They did not see the scratches Optimus left on his armor as a mark of affirmation of a job well done, but instead viewed it as abuse. They did not see how Optimus's constant reminders and glares were a kind reminder of their shared orders to remain hidden. Instead they saw only malice where Bumblebee knew there to be stern but true love. They could not witness the subsonic song that Optimus sang and Bumblebee returned at all times. How could they with their unaugmented audials?

Optimus cared for him, although he never said so aloud. Not in the traditional Cybertronian manner at any rate. The one time Bumblebee asked if his Sire did love him earned him a response that those who might have been listening were sure to see as dark.

"Sire... do you love me?"

"Into you I put vorns of my effort, attention, and care. Millennia of accumulated protomatter that I molded with my own limbs with utmost devotion. I spend every waking moment considering and contemplating, thinking of your future. I give my spark to your development and my mind to your rearing. No longer could I dare to create another. You are my one and only heir."

That was all he needed to know for certain. His mind recognized the emotional undertone and his instincts accepted the offered truths. Nothing else mattered. Optimus loved him, and despite the efforts of the ignorant Autobots and their plans to keep him away from his Sire, they always reconnected soon enough. Usually Bumblebee tried not to worry over the reactions of the Autobots to his and his Sire's interactions, but there were times when it was hard. More than once he heard Ratchet cursing Optimus out, yelling about him being a horrible Sire. Several times he noted Jazz working Optimus into a corner and calling him a monster. And while only once, there was a time where even Preceptor pulled his sniper rifle on the Prime, threatening to make him "keel over from and unfortunate accident in the labs" should he fail to improve.

They did not understand. But Optimus was always there to reassure Bumblebee and comfort him after such things. They would not be separated. Optimus was always in control, always so composed and possessed a far greater sense of duty. He never fought with his instincts, at least not that Bumblebee could see. The Prime blended in all but perfectly socially, befriending all and performing as a perfect leader. The only ones who were on his case were those who fought in Bumblebee's "defense". However even they remained amicable to toward him.

The singular time Bumblebee ever saw Optimus lose control was the cycle Megatron tore out his vocalizer. There was no time for his instincts to react or for him to break from his shell, but as he fell to the ground and bathed in his own energon, he saw his Sire enraged for the first time in his life.

He leapt through the air, limbs too long to be proper and his face all but split in half to reveal a maw of fangs and mandibles. Bladed limbs extended from his shoulders and his legs were crooked and out of place as he charged with a scream to make even the dead quake. Wrath and fury never before seen had Optimus charging with wild abandon, his shell transforming away more with ever moment and terrifying all those in the vicinity. All Bumblebee could do as Megatron fled and Optimus came to his side was silently convey the order they were both bound to.

"Blend in, do not be seen. Our time has not yet come."

Bumblebee was taken to the medical ward where he was stabilized. He felt true grief at his lost vocalizer, but it was partially drowned out by the relief that came from seeing his Sire back within his shell, even if he was expressing emotions far more openly than usual. As the Prime tended to him in a more Cybertronian manner during his recovery, Bumblebee heard the stories. A monster of red and blue charging at Megatron, a spark eater or a ghoul, a creature of legend to be eliminated on sight.

As soon as he was able, Bumblebee was quick to silence any witnesses who actually believed that what they saw was Optimus Prime. There could be no one to reveal them. They had their orders. It was not their time. Accidents happened, and while it brought him no joy, cleaning up a few loose ends was better in the long run. The Autobots needed their Prime, and Bumblebee refused to see his Sire exposed for trying to protect him.

"Obey or perish."

Such was their reality, even as they headed for Earth.

#transformers #maccadam #transformers prime #optimus prime #ratchet #bumblebee #eldritch abomination #slight angst #hints toward abuse but not really #jazz #mystery #slight at any rate #this idea has been chillin in my brain for a while #I fully intend to expand on it if there is any interest

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sysboxes · 2 months

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Hi, I saw you make a userbox on C-DID and I wanted to ask if you maybe have a good resource or something that explains what it is? cause I have DID but ive never heard it with the C attached... no worries if not. thank you!!

C-DID stands for Complex DID. Complex DID and Polyfragmented DID are the same thing, though some people may say that there are some differences.

(I’ll just refer to it as polyfrag for the rest of this for simplicity)

Polyfragmented DID is considered a more “complex” version of DID. The complexity comes from:

splitting patterns ~ splitting several alters/fragments at once, splitting a lot over a short period of time, and/or splitting more frequently or easily

fragments ~ not all DID systems have fragments whereas polyfrag DID systems typically have at least some, if not a lot. Often times polyfrag can have subsystems made up of fragments or they’ll have at least one group of alters who are fragments holding similar trauma or the same traumatic experience split up between fragments (example: one fragment holds the emotions or the fear, one holds the sensations, one holds the memories, etc. or they each hold bits of memory. Or whatever else, it varies)

System Structure ~ briefly mentioned above, but with polyfrag it’s primarily about the way the system is structured or the way the system functions. Meaning polyfrag have subsystems (an alter has their own system OR there is a group of alters who exist together or function as one collective), a system or group of alters separated from the “main” group of alters, etc

The person typically starts being traumatized and forced to dissociate in infancy or sometimes as a toddler (whereas with DID, you can start developing DID later on). Though this is not a requirement and not always the case.

With polyfrag DID, they’re usually forced to dissociate throughout childhood, sometimes even throughout being a teen and sometimes during adulthood or at least early adulthood

polyfrag systems can have high alter count, but this is not a requirement. And it’s typically that they have lots of fragments, not fully-formed/fleshed out alters.

polyfrag systems do not have to switch frequently, though some do switch frequently or have a larger group of alters who help take care of daily things

Because Complex DID and Polyfrag DID are not actually medical terms, it’s hard to find reliable information on them. They are more just community terms for people to describe their unique experiences. Basically it’s a way to differentiate themselves from typical DID systems and a way to describe their more complex structure. Some therapists or medical professionals may describe someone’s DID as being complex or polyfragmented, but again, it’s not actually a medical term it’s more just a descriptor.

Every system is going to be different. Everyone uses these terms to mean something a little different. But the stuff I listed is generally what people use it to mean.

Here’s some links below (again, these aren’t medical terms so there aren’t really medical papers or anything on it and it’s mostly just people in the community describing their experiences or what they consider polyfragmentation)

Someone on tumblr listing what a polyfrag system usually means

Someone on tumblr describing difference between DID and C-DID

Someone on tumblr explaining what fragments are

Someone on tumblr explaining what polyfrag is and quoting research

Someone on tumblr listing what C-DID could entail

A PDF of a medical paper on complex MPD (this paper is from the 1980s I think, when DID was still called MPD)

A polyfrag DID systems vent on Reddit about what being polyfrag is for them (I wasn’t really sure about whether to include this or not bc it is a vent but it’s also a good explaination of what polyfrag DID actually is versus what people portray it as on social media..)

(if any of this is wrong plz let me know we’re not perfect lol and I didn’t read through all of these links)

#not a userbox #c-did #c did #mod weeping ❤️

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polyfrag-kero · 2 months

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saw someone else do this and i wanted to try it but i don't remember who so credit to them! id love to see the similarities and differences between us and other systems!

you can also reblog/comment with specifics about your system!

- Cameron

#cameron.txt #endos dni #anti endo #dissociative system #polyfrag system #traumagenic system #actually did #dissociative identity disorder #c did #system stuff

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orange-orchard-system · 11 months

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Fuck it. Positivity time.

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems that co-front all or most of the time!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems that often have busy fronting rooms!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who don't know where they end and another system member begins!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who have a hard time keeping track of all their system members!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who can't tell which or how many of their members are fragments!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who have lots of members with highly specific jobs or roles!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems with lots of introjects from the same source(s)!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who often have a blurry/blended identity!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who have a hard time figuring out if/what problems they may have with dissociation and/or amnesia!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who have lots of subsystems and sidesystems!!

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who don't have lots of subsystems and sidesystems!!

And, most of all since I saw this misconception recently,

Shout-out to polyfragmented systems who are partly or wholly endogenic!! Having lots of system members who are less defined doesn't decide your origin!!

Shout-out to you, polyfragmented systems!!

#plurality #pluralgang #actuallyplural #plural system #actuallymultiple #front soup.txt #polyfrag system #polyfragmented #positivity #positivelyplural #plural positivity

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historysurvivalguide · 5 days

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Debugging Code 15 Billion Miles Away

NASA’s Voyager 1 Resumes Sending Engineering Updates to Earth

For the first time since November, NASA’s Voyager 1 spacecraft is returning usable data about the health and status of its onboard engineering systems. The next step is to enable the spacecraft to begin returning science data again. The probe and its twin, Voyager 2, are the only spacecraft to ever fly in interstellar space (the space between stars).

Voyager 1 stopped sending readable science and engineering data back to Earth on Nov. 14, 2023, even though mission controllers could tell the spacecraft was still receiving their commands and otherwise operating normally. In March, the Voyager engineering team at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Southern California confirmed that the issue was tied to one of the spacecraft’s three onboard computers, called the flight data subsystem (FDS). The FDS is responsible for packaging the science and engineering data before it’s sent to Earth.

The team discovered that a single chip responsible for storing a portion of the FDS memory — including some of the FDS computer’s software code — isn’t working. The loss of that code rendered the science and engineering data unusable. Unable to repair the chip, the team decided to place the affected code elsewhere in the FDS memory. But no single location is large enough to hold the section of code in its entirety.

So they devised a plan to divide the affected code into sections and store those sections in different places in the FDS. To make this plan work, they also needed to adjust those code sections to ensure, for example, that they all still function as a whole. Any references to the location of that code in other parts of the FDS memory needed to be updated as well.

The team started by singling out the code responsible for packaging the spacecraft’s engineering data. They sent it to its new location in the FDS memory on April 18. A radio signal takes about 22 ½ hours to reach Voyager 1, which is over 15 billion miles (24 billion kilometers) from Earth, and another 22 ½ hours for a signal to come back to Earth. When the mission flight team heard back from the spacecraft on April 20, they saw that the modification worked: For the first time in five months, they have been able to check the health and status of the spacecraft.

#voyager #voyager 1 #voyager 2 #nasa #nasa JPL #JPL #astronomy

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thydungeongal · 6 months

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Hey random question (cuz I see u talk a lot about ttrpg mechanics): One mechanic I once saw that I really loved was in the Firefly roleplaying game (based on that Joss Whedon show that FOX canceled after 1 season), I think they called it the Cortex System. Instead of Ability Scores with modifiers, Abilities and skills instead had die types, with d4 on the low end up to like d12, and most actions in the game boil down to (Ability Die) + (Skill Die) + modifiers vs. an opposed skill check. The thing I really liked about it is that skills weren't necessarily tied to a specific attribute. An example the book gives (based on a scene from the show) is when Simon, the ship's doctor, is fighting an Alliance soldier, who is prone. Simon's hands are bound by handcuffs and he's definitely not a strong fighter. However due to his background as a doctor he was able to use his INT die + (whatever the unarmed combat skill was called, I forget) instead of his much lower STR die. Thanks to his knowledge of human anatomy he was able to use a knee to apply pressure to an artery, rendering the soldier unconscious. If you can convince the DM/GM that an attribute/skill combination makes sense, anything goes. I wonder if you know of any other ttrpg with a similar mechanic that you'd recommend.

Oh, I'm also a fan of systems that allow you to combine different pairs of Ability/Attribute and Skill/Talent/whatever! Here's just a few that I think are interesting:

The World of Darkness/Chronicles of Darkness systems (formerly old World of Darkness and new World of Darkness): Both of these systems have your characters' Attributes and Abilities/Skills measured with their own dot values and the basic resolution mechanic is always dots from Attribute+dots from Ability/Skill (WoD calls its "skill-equivalents" Abilities confusingly, while CoD calls them Skills) to form a dice pool. WoD is more open to the idea of combining any Attribute with any Ability, while CoD has a bit more of a formalized system of Skills being Physical/Mental/Social, but theoretically both systems do allow for combining any Attribute with any Ability/Skill (although it's important to note that for certain subsystems certain pairs of stats are set in stone: firing a gun is always Firearms+Dexterity, but knowing about guns might allow for a Firearms+Intelligence check).

Space Kings: Space Kings is a playing-card based role-playing game where the number of flips you get to make for a check is equal to an Attribute+Skill. Now, I have neither read nor played Space Kings yet, but based on one of my favorite actual play podcasts (Three of Hearts, @threeheartscast) who use Space Kings in a custom setting, the system definitely allows for unorthodox combinations of Attribute+Skill.

Mothership: Mothership is an absolutely fantastic retro sci-fi horror RPG that not only has one of the best visual designs and layouts I've ever seen and a character sheet that actually acts as a flowchart for character creation!!! But anyway, Mothership has skills that are at three different levels of specialization, granting a +10 to +20% bonus on relevant ability checks. But none of the skills are explicitly tied to specific ability scores! You may be able to convince your GM that your Mechanical Repair skill could apply while using a hand welder or laser cutter as a weapon!

If anyone knows of any other systems like this, chime in in the notes. I know for sure there are plenty of these systems out there, but I simply can't remember all of them.

#thydungeongal answers

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spacetimewithstuartgary · 4 days

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NASA’s Voyager 1 Resumes Sending Engineering Updates to Earth

After some inventive sleuthing, the mission team can — for the first time in five months — check the health and status of the most distant human-made object in existence.

During the coming weeks, the team will relocate and adjust the other affected portions of the FDS software. These include the portions that will start returning science data.

Voyager 2 continues to operate normally. Launched over 46 years ago, the twin Voyager spacecraft are the longest-running and most distant spacecraft in history. Before the start of their interstellar exploration, both probes flew by Saturn and Jupiter, and Voyager 2 flew by Uranus and Neptune.

#science #space #astronomy #physics #news #nasa #astrophysics

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