#she was so much happier in our calls than id heard her be in a long time

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

.

[starryeyedadmirer]

Going into his first year at SEAU, Jeremy thought that he knew what he was getting himself into… that he had a pretty good understanding of the many horrors that he’d have to put up with while living on campus. All throughout his high school years, he’d heard about the countless humiliation rituals that the upperclassmen would put the new freshman through, to welcome them to college. Every day, there were at least a dozen new stories.

So many students were put through horrific “trials” — things like surviving in the woods at night, naked and alone… getting their heads flushed in all the dirtiest toilets on the campus, until their lungs were liquified and their hair smelled like potty-water… eating the disgusting foods that the upperclassmen would make, using stuff that they found in the garbage bins… and so much more. Trials were just part of the culture… more innocent than they were harmful… and, with the mandatory first-year stay policy being strictly enforced, “Froshies” were always the most populated class; that made them easy targets.

After graduating high school, Jeremy immediately set his sights on SEAU and applied to enroll in the following fall semester, knowing full-well that he’d be put through hell during his first year on campus. It was a risky decision, but he didn’t care. SEAU was located in the heart of his hometown, just across the river from his parents’ house… and with his transcripts looking the way that they did, it would’ve been riskier for him to go any farther than that for schooling. Like so many of the other kids in his town, SEAU was his only choice for higher education… at least, the only realistic choice. It was either SEAU, or he’d have to go work a hard job at the shipyard…

_________________________________

Before Jeremy knew it, the first day of school had already come and gone. He was officially a college student! The first in his family to continue his education past the twelfth grade.

He had no clue what career he wanted to pursue yet… but, nevertheless, he was happy to be there. Walking through the halls made him feel powerful… like he was a real adult, making his way in the world. He was studying his core curriculum — math, science, english, and economics — making new friends, eating delicious foods, and living in his own dorm.

Every weekend, he’d visit his family across the river, and be showered with praise and affection. His parents were so proud of their little boy, for pursuing a higher education… even if he wasn’t going to the best school in the state. Him living so close by made his mother feel like she still had her baby in her arms, and his father liked that he could still watch football with him on Sundays. They couldn’t have been happier!

Things were looking up… that is, until Jeremy was ambushed with his first freshman trial…

_________________________________

The day started out like usual. Jeremy woke up in the afternoon, put on his baggiest pair of pajama pants, bathed himself with cheap body spray, threw on some open-toed sandals, an even bunchier hoodie, and left for class.

He was planning to meet up with one of his buddies before class, and hang out in the student lounge for a while. The guy was in his junior year at SEAU, and Jeremy had only known him for a few weeks… but he seemed cool enough. Mitchell was his name, but everyone called him “Tuck.”

Jeremy strolled up to the building and swiped his ID card at the door… but, unbeknownst to him, when he stepped into the lobby, he walked right into a trap.

_________________________________

Alright, guys… where should I go with this story? Jeremy is about to experience his very first trial… and his belly is about to be pushed to it’s limits. Should our little freshman get pregnant, or have his belly stuffed with food?

[festeringneondistraction]

I'm starting my new job for real tomorrow and i'm so anxious.

So after months of unemployment i finally got a job. Well its technically not a job it more like paid community service. Its called Mandy's Farm and its part of the Americorps program, I am serving as a part of the Vamos program. We provide employment services and adult skills training to developmentally disabled people between 14-25 years old. Plenty of other things but I suggest a google to get the full picture.

For context I am 19 years old and have a background in daycare and special needs students, more importantly I am AuDHD and disabled as well. I've come into this field because of a deep desire to help my people and other community members. I crave advocacy, I've always wanted to feel like i'm actually helping people, I want to be in the trenches. So far everyone is super accommodating and nice so i really don't have anything to worry about. I'm just meeting a lot of people in person who have heard a lot about me presumably and that is really anxiety provoking. What about the students? They seem super nice but im still really worried about people not liking me. Plus there are likely disabilities that I have yet to encounter that I will have to adjust to and learn about which isn't a bad thing at all that's fine. But what if I mess up?? What if I get overstimulated and shy?

This is definitely a step up the professional ladder for me which is unnatural. I was prepared to go back to Joann's or worse. I'm still super broke but I can already tell that i'm going to be so much happier. I hope I can get along with everyone, people think i'm knowledgeable which in my opinion is quite a high compliment. Weirdly enough my daycare experience already appears to be more relevant than I thought same thing with my performing arts school background. I hope there are people that I can relate to and that relate to me. Currently i'm just listening to Death cab for Cutie and a Cewpins Vod (highly recommend if you smoke at all!!) because after training I was just totally wiped and got home and did my routine.

We had to go to home depot to get a replacement toilet handle because you gotta love cheap apartments. :)

Get home (BF does the toilet because im wiped out).

Immediately do a hugeeeee afterwork dab.

Chill high as fuck for a bit.

Order food reluctantly.

Wait for than eat the food.

Try to stay up.

Fail.

Pass out in an unnatural position with lights on and everything.

Have random sex because fuck it lol.

Sleep part 2.

Wake up.

Computer at like 1:15 am

Get your stimulation of choice.

Dab again.

Get anxious then hop on tumblr to vent.

So that's pretty much it. Jacob is still asleep. He's still frustrated and depressed understandably so but the difference is that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and he cant seem to yet, I guess it feels a little closer for me... Things have been really hard lately,,, our guinea pig Boston died a few days ago.. We haven't been able to bury him yet so he's just in our freezer... Which sucks because I don't cook really so I cant use my freezer so like pretty much all my food. I would like to get some closure. He's definitely still haunting me.

My only IRL friend I live near has Covid and her whole family including her 1 year old daughter is sick.. I just got over Covid and it sucks ass. She said she got it from work but its fucking everywhere again where i'm at so who even knows.

I also cant find my goddamn wallet!! I have google pay and everything but i still need my damn wallet!! Im frustrated because this is the seccound important wallet I have not been able to to find and i cant get fucked over again. If any witches have some lost object spells or tips id genuinely appreciate it i'm pretty desperate.

I have a feeling this new job is definitely going to keep me busy, Another huge advantage is when I finish my service I get an education award that can go to past of future collage payments. I could attempt to start collage... god who knows I still cant drive I still can only manage 6th grade math. I wish that I was competent at math i never have been.

I say 6th grade roughly it could be better but it is likely even worse than i think it is. I have serve trauma relating to a math teacher I had in middle school and then highschool. It goes back even farther because you know how undiagnosed learning disabilities are. The school had to intervene because he was my only option for a math class. Long story short I ended up getting a free math credit in 8th grade where during the period id just sit in the deans office and use it as a "study hall". Listened to some great music in that "class" i was often productive but not in the ways that people wanted me to lol.

I'm debating hoping on some Khan academy or something just because i resent math so hard I need to conquer it. Plus if I'm planning on college (which I am) I want to be ready for gen eds. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH my brain is scrambled i just want my ebt card bro. Im outta fooddddd. I miss money, Is it time to talk to rich art school friend?? Is that unethical?? Alan if youre reading this id appreciate whatever is possible <3 ( kidding not kiddingggg)

[blackvail22]

i talk here a bunch each day because i have no one else to talk to.

its sad, honestly.

i couldnt go to my counseling appointment, so i wont be able to see her again for another 2 weeks

thats nearly a month since ive seen her

im not doing very well so this isnt good at all lmao

idk how im going to make it another 2 weeks but all i can do is try ...

i think i start work again next week. im afraid of what has changed... probably not a lot. all i know is we have a new manager, and ive heard he's nice

i have a postop appt on tuesday for my tonsillectomy. finally i will have what my disease means explained to meeee. i keep thinking about it, and its been bothering me. i probably wont know if i have another surgery until after my next ct scan (they have to space them out so i dont get exposed to too much radiation and i had one less than a month ago) and idk when that is

im so bored. i have to be the problem

i really think i am

"my friends wont reach out" but when i reach out its super dry and they varely engage. maybe im seeing it in the wrong perspective. maybe my vision is skewed, and im seeing it in the wrong light.

maybe its because theyre busy

maybe at work

going to work

hanging out with other friends

going to hang out with other friends

i want to have a good friend group so bad but i feel like i cant have one

i feel like my only friend was em even though she used me. oh, i dont know if i ever told u the reason why we arent friends anymore

so, i dont have the best memory of the order everything happened, but ill do my best to sort it out

after spending a bunch of time together, we started to fade away. i would ask her if she wanted to spend the night, she would hesitate for a good 30 minutes, talk to her mom, and then say "sure". sometimes she wouldnt wait until we ate dinner (but a good amount of times she did) until shed say "oh i forgot something at home" or "my stomach hurts" and id walk to her house with her (except the times when she'd tell me not to).

when i walked with her, she would always say "ill be right back" and then shed be gone for 10 minutes and her mom would come out and be like "hey... she doesnt feel well so she's going to say home". and each time i would walk home crying. at this point, she was already blowing me off, not talking to me, and overall being rude, but i still went back to her every time.

this rare occasion was in early september of 2017. we only hung out, and then she said she had someone else shes hanging w at her house. she had become friends with people that hated my sister as well as a girl that honestly no one knows. em started to become them... like literally she became a copy of them. the whole group of girls would tell her that my sister is a fat, ugly whore. they fed her all of this, and they would talk and call my sister names and generally talk shit about her

a few days after i heard abt this, i saw things from em that she was having a hard time. i was outside doing yard work, and she was walking by. i said "hey, i hope you feel better" and she yelled "fuck you" at me while, again, giving me the finger.

i dont know what i did, but that was the last time in years that we would talk to each other. we would be "friends" on the bus the few days she went to school sophomore year...

now, though? i dont exist to her. i saw her at my work TWICE this past year, once being on my recent birthday, and she pretended she didnt know me. i look the same as i did before... this most recent time, she was with her boyfriend, one of the friends from '17 and her mom. as i greeted them, everyone looked over except her... her mom even did a double take.

she claims she doesnt know why our friendship went to shit when we were toxic to each other our whole friendship. it was never healthy.

she seems to be happy though, at least happier than me. shes pregnant again. im not sure of the gender, but i think its going to be a boy. she's always wanted to be a mom, so i hope shes a good one.

[blu-bax]

Day 1

rating: 8/10

Today is the first day of my blog :), today was pretty good, but i couldn’t find my student ID and i was freaking the fuck out! I texted my mom and she said not to worry about it and that i can just ask for a new one. I was nervous to but i went along. Then i got to on the bus with my friend rayna and i asked her if she could get my new ID with me since i was nervous, she said yes and we finally got to the school where we saw some older women standing in a hall. “Hey she forgot her ID” rayna said “First period.” the lady said we were confused but didn’t care that much, if anyone asked about my ID i would just tell them what was going on. Then we headed straight for the gym like we were told we sat there and waited to be allowed to walk to class, i forgot what my first class was called but we basically learn how to photoshop, animate, and code a little. My teacher (let’s call her Mrs.Tech) gave us our new schedule because the decided to change it i guess? Mrs.Tech asked us some weird questions though, like no relation to the class questions? “Is Cardi B better than Niki Minaj?” weird af but go off i guess. Then i went to my second class which was math, due to our schedule change my other friend Jaida was in my math block :D my teacher (lets say Mrs.Math) kept on talking about shrek and other stuff, then we heard the school speakers go on “if you do not have your ID badge then please come down to the library.” The women on the speaker repeated what she said once more as i made eye contact with Mrs.Math and pointed to my neck where my ID badge should’ve been. She sent me down to the library where i got my picture taken and the printed out my ID. IT LOOKED LIKE A MUGSHOT PHOTO. It was so embarrassing but it’s better than what the original picture was lol. fast forward a couple classes because i’m tired and my fingers hurt, i made a friend named Carter and he’s really nice to me! he kinda looks like that gay kid from south park (the pic should be down there) but we hung out a lot and then i went to lunch where i found my other friends and we joked around about my ID and my squished nutella sandwich i had made that same morning (note to self, get a container next time instead just a ziplock baggie) time skip again and it’s dismissal, i get on my bus and go home. ANOTHER TIME SKIP IM SORRY ITS GETTING LATE 4 ME!! i’m eating dinner with my mom and we’re talking about me moving in with her in maybe a month because we both think i’ll be happier with her than my dad. I can talk more about that soon if you guys want. then we go take a walk and just talk about stuff from when my parents were together. then i’m back home where my dad is being a bit of a bitch but i’m sure he was just tired <:). now i’m here :D! also there are a lot of pretty alt girls that go to my school! I made sure they knew that. now i’m in bed about to head to sleep while listening to spotify in a dark super hot room. Stay safe sweethearts!

[purple-babygirl]

First of all… who told you that you could toy with my heart over your latest work: SamBucky and the injuries Little. Talk about the angst but fluff. Just mwah!

But will all that angst especially with Sam and Bucky—they are just a perfect combo, btw. I now am needy for angst to fluff (oops…). All I can think about is an insecure little who think that her daddies don’t love her after a misunderstanding, so she pack up her things and runs away. (But a happy ending is ensured) when Sam and Bucky are able to find her

Love you.

Pairing: SamBucky x little!f!reader

Word Count: 2,796

Warnings: polyamory, ddlg dynamics, a dash of angst, and a pinch of fluff

A/N: Hello, Nonnie! Thank you for reading, and thank you for sharing this idea with me and allowing me to toy with your heart over it!💜💜 I was a puddle writing this one. I'm really sorry if this took me too long; I hope it's to your liking and I love you too *ghost kisses*💜 please enjoy xx

~~

unwanted

“That's enough. Go to your room.” Sam demanded angrily, looking down at the cheerios covering the kitchen floor that he now would have to clean up.

“Papa-”

“All you do is cause trouble and I'm done! To your room, now!”

She's been bad again. It was the third time this week. She has been disobedient and impatient. Whenever Papa and Daddy told her to do anything she somehow managed to mess it up. Sam had told her not to touch anything but she wanted to help nevertheless. She couldn’t reach the cupboard though and ended up spilling the box of cereal all over the place.

Her gaze dropped and she walked to her room without another word and a few minutes later, Bucky came to give her lunch and collect her phone and tablet, taking away her screen time for the day.

“But daddy-”

“No, doll. I'm taking them away. You never listen anymore and it needs to stop.”

Papa and Daddy are mad at you. They don't love you no more. They're sick of you. You never listen and you're always bad. They could be so much happier and calmer if it wasn't for you always riling them up. They were done. It needed to stop. They don't love you no more. They don't want you no more. They don't love you. They don't want you.

She sat wallowing in her room, tears gathering in her eyes as her own mind attacked her. Maybe it was all true. All she does is cause trouble.

So maybe if she left…

She got up and got her big girl backpack out of the closet.

Maybe if she left Papa and Daddy would be better off without her.

Tears streamed down her cheeks as she gathered and pushed items into her bag.

Maybe if she was gone they would be less angry.

She zipped the bag up before sloppily slipping her socks on and picking up her stuffed friend.

Maybe if she escaped the house she could escape her thoughts too; leave them all in her room and go.

She wiped her cheeks, tiptoed out of her room, found her shoes by the front door and quietly got into them. She could hear Daddy and Papa lowly laughing together while they got things done in the backyard. Leaving really was the right decision then; they were happier without her.

Taking one, last, tear-blurred look at the house, she stepped outside and quietly closed the door behind her. She held her small white bunny to her chest and sniffed before taking off, walking to the only place that would bring her comfort.

~

“She's going to be so happy. I can't wait to see her face.” Sam smiled proudly, hands on his waist as he took one last look at the swing he and Bucky have put together for their baby girl in the backyard.

“I really hope she likes it.” Bucky smiled back in agreement before opening the door for Sam and walking inside behind him.

They felt they were too hard on her that morning and she was usually a good girl, only intending to do good for her Daddy and Papa. So they decided to build the swing earlier than they’d previously planned to lighten things up again.

“Is it just me or is it awfully quiet in here?” Bucky murmured, bringing the water bottle down from his mouth and looking around the living room in slight suspicion.

“I mean, she is in a timeout and you did take away her phone,” Sam reminded him, trying not to let himself panic as he got himself a water bottle from the fridge.

But it wasn’t that. Bucky could still hear her presence no matter how quiet. He could hear her crayons gliding on paper when she would sit down to color. He could hear her hum as she organized her toys around the table for tea parties. This quietness wasn’t normal.

Bucky jogged up the stairs to her room and just as he feared, she wasn't in there. Her sandwich was untouched. Her closet was open and her backpack and favourite blankie were missing.

“Sam!” He called for his husband, taking long strides to their bedroom to find she wasn't there either.

Sam ran up the stairs at Bucky's freaked tone and saw him pacing through the hallway.

“She's not here.”

“What?” Sam’s heart sank into his stomach.

“I can't find her.” Bucky shook his head at Sam, running his fingers through his hair in growing panic.

“Hey, calm down. We're gonna find her.” Sam rubbed a hand down Bucky's back, trying to hide his own fright for Bucky's sake as his mind ran to every single place she knew how to get to on her own.

“How? How are we gonna find her? We don't even know where she went or if she's okay-”

Sam put a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, the other cupping his cheek.

“Hey, breathe,” Sam instructed, slowly breathing so Bucky could copy him, trying to send away the panic attack ready to take over him. Bucky nuzzled his palm, his breath coming out shaky.

“That's it, Buck. In and out.” He moved his hands to Bucky’s.

“But she was so little when we sent her to her room and she probably doesn't even have any ID or money with her-”

“Bucky,” Sam squeezed his husband’s hands.

“We can't lose her, Sam. I can't- I took her phone away- if she's in trouble, she won't be able to-”

“Bucky, baby, we're gonna find her and she's gonna be okay. I promise.” Sam reassured him with words he himself wasn't sure would turn out to be true, his large palm stroking up and down the tense muscles of Bucky’s back, “I need you to keep breathing for me.”

Bucky tried to manage his breathing, slightly calming down to the thought of getting to hold her again.

“She couldn't have gotten that far, so we're gonna look around and I'm gonna call Steve, okay?” Bucky nodded at Sam's words, glossy eyes closing as Sam planted a kiss to the side of his forehead, “okay, baby. Let's go.”

~

Sam took the car, driving slowly, roaming the neighborhood to see if she was anywhere around the area. He was asking anyone and everyone who passed by his car if they've seen her. But apparently, no one has. Not even the old couple at the end of the street with the dog she loved to pet so much.

Bucky chose to go on foot as he walked in the other direction, preferring to depend on his enhanced senses instead of talking to other people. Even if he did talk to them for help, no one would understand that while her picture looked like that of a grown lady, she was a mere baby. They would never understand their panic.

Sam rubbed his forehead in frustration, leaning it against the wheel. He’d just hung up with Steve. He said she didn't come to his place; didn't even stop by. In fact, he hasn’t heard from her at all and got worried when Sam called. He took an uneven breath, trying to maintain his cool before he lifted his head up and started the car again.

~

Leaning back on the big tree, she wrapped her soft blankie tighter around her frame. It was getting kind of chilly and she was starting to regret leaving now that it wasn't that sunny anymore. The tears drying on her cheeks made her shiver even more and she sniffled, kissing her bunny's head and tugging the stuffed animal under her chin. She hoped Daddy and Papa were feeling better now that she was no longer there with them.

“Doll?” She heard Bucky's voice and before she could wonder if she'd imagined it, she was pressed to a hard chest.

“Oh, thank god,” Bucky sighed, kissing the side of her head over and over again, his hands tight around her back, holding her and her bunny close to his frantically beating heart.

“Baby, why'd you leave like that? We were so worried! We looked everywhere, we called everyone.” Bucky kissed her forehead a bunch before “-oh right!”

He got his phone out of his pocket with one arm, the other still firmly holding her to his chest. She kept holding onto her bunny, not really getting what was happening. Was she in trouble for leaving unannounced or not? Why would Daddy and Papa want to find her? She was nothing but trouble.

“Sam, I found her! We're in our secret place in the park.”

At Bucky's call, Sam took a sharp turn, stepping on the gas to get to the park as fast as he could.

“Are you okay, doll? Are you hurt anywhere?” Bucky asked her after hanging up, anxiously checking her head, face, arms and legs for injuries.

She shook her head silently, fresh, hot tears burning at the brims of her eyes.

“Thank god.” Bucky hugged her to his chest again, “we were so scared, doll. We were so scared.”

He kissed her damp cheeks and chin as she kept biting her lip, quietly sniveling.

She'd scared them. She'd worried them. Why was it always that she did something wrong while trying to do anything right? She was no good.

“It’s okay, love. I found you. I’m right here.” Bucky kissed her eyelids, then her nose, thinking she was crying because she was lost alone.

He pulled her on his lap and adjusted himself in her place, his back to the tree trunk as he held her close, fearing she’d disappear if he were to loosen his grip around her.

“Sugar!” Sam’s voice echoed through the empty part of the park when he saw her burrito-wrapped body in Bucky’s lap.

“Papa’s here, doll. It’s okay.” Bucky whispered to her when she didn’t stop crying.

She turned around and her eyes met Sam’s watery, brown ones.

“Hey, sugar,” Sam greeted softly, getting down on his knees before her.

Her lower lip jutted out further as new tears soaked her pretty face. It hasn’t even been a whole day and she’s missed Papa and Daddy so much. How was she ever planning on running away from them or being without them?

“Aww, no, no, baby, it’s okay,” Sam cooed, bringing her to his chest and engulfing her in a protective hug.

Her blanket fell in Bucky’s lap and she dropped her bunny to cling to Sam, barely quieting her sobs.

Not able to hold himself together any longer, a tear escaped Sam’s eye his gaze met Bucky’s. He buried his nose in her hair and squeezed her closer to him, sighing in relief that they’ve found her. His mind kept torturing him with scenarios of her getting hurt and not getting help. He didn’t know what he would’ve done if they’d actually lost her.

“You’re okay, sugar. Papa’s here with you. I’m sorry it took us so long, baby. We were looking in a lot of places.” Sam sniffled, pulling back to pepper featherlike kisses all over her face.

“You wanted to find me?” Her small, brittle voice asked, doe eyes staring up sadly.

“What? Of course we wanted to find you, baby! Why would you think otherwise?!”

“But I was bad. You w-were done. It needed to stop,” she repeated his and Bucky’s words on him and Sam felt shame cover him from head to toe, Bucky not any different as he bit down to stop his tears.

“Doll,” Bucky went to hold her hands only to find they were freezing.

“Shit! She’s too cold,” he told Sam, who immediately started taking off his jacket.

“Dada, bad word,” she softly reminded Bucky, covering her mouth with her hand before Sam got out of his jacket.

Sam slipped his warm jacket on her and pulled the zipper up, her small hands disappearing inside the long sleeves.

“Good girl, sugar. It is a bad word.” He rolled the sleeves back just enough to get her palms out so she could still hold her bunny.

“But you don’t see me asking daddy to leave because he was bad, do you?” Sam asked tenderly and she shook her head no.

“Exactly, I’m not. You know why?” Sam pressed kisses to both of her hands multiple times, rubbing them between his palms to warm her up.

“Why, papa?” she asked as he carried her in his arms; Bucky gathering the rest of her stuff.

“Because I love him so much." Sam wiped her tears. "And both me and daddy love you so so so much, sugar.” He pressed a firm kiss to her temple.

Bucky handed her the small bunny back after patting any dust or leaves out of it.

“We never want you to go, doll.” Bucky pressed a kiss to her shoulder.

“Even when I’m really really bad?”

“Even if you’re really really bad,” Sam guaranteed, kissing her temple again.

“But- I thought papa and daddy would be happier and not so angry no more if I left,” she mumbled innocently as Sam started walking to the car with her in his arms.

“That could never be true, doll. We’re only happy as long as we have you,” Bucky reassured her, opening the backseat door so Papa could slip in with her on his lap.

“And you still love me?” Her pout, teary puppy eyes and words were just killing both men inside.

“Of course we love you, doll! We will always love you. We can never afford to lose you,” Bucky told her, his eyes searching hers to offer them comfort.

“Baby, we love you so much it’s uncountable, remember?” Sam ran his thumb over the knuckles of her stuffie-holding hands.

She nodded, her eyes teary but her smile comforted and reassured. “I love you too, Papa,” she mumbled, grabbing onto Sam’s thumb, her eyelids barely staying open.

“I’m sorry I left,” she sniffled.

“It’s alright, baby. We’re all together now and we're going home.” Sam kissed her forehead once more, wanting her to forget all about it and know everything was okay again.

“Told you we’d find her,” Sam said, drawing Bucky inside the car by the cheek and brushing his lips against his.

“You did.” Bucky nodded, pressing his forehead to Sam’s and kissing him again.

Bucky pulled back and smiled adoringly at her sleepy eyes fighting to stay open as she leaned onto Sam's chest before getting in the driver’s seat to take them home. Sam was caressing her hair and before she knew it her eyes were fluttering closed.

All the crying all day had drained her and her body could finally give up and relax now that she was in Papa’s hold; she was out like a light.

“You’re so important to me and daddy, sugar. Never ever forget that,” Sam whispered against her forehead before pressing a slow kiss to her skin.

She might've had no idea how adored and cherished she actually was, but that was okay. Sam and Bucky had a lifetime ahead of them where they could show her again and again that they loved and needed her just as much as she did them.

~

“Dada! Papa! Wake up! We have a swing!”

She’d fallen asleep pretty early in the car last night and neither Sam nor Bucky had the heart to wake her up when they got home. So they took her shoes and socks off and tucked her in in their bed.

Now they had to deal with her waking up way too early. She’d gone to the bathroom on her own like a good girl before her stomach hungrily grumbled. And when she got to the kitchen for a cup of water and maybe the plate of fruit in the fridge, her eyes fell on the swing showing outside the small window on the kitchen door.

Bucky rolled over and opened his eyes first, her jumping on her knees on the bed beside him pulling him out of his dreams. Sam, however, didn’t move a muscle. The man slept so soundly that sometimes Bucky was jealous. How heavy of a sleeper could a person be?

“Yes, we do, baby.” Bucky chuckled. “Me and papa built it just for you.” He smiled sleepily at her excited face before annoyingly poking Sam’s back, “Sam, wake up.”

“Tank you, dada.” She settled back on her ankles though still buzzing with joy.

“You like it, sugar?” Bucky opened his arms wide for her.

“Yes, I love it.” She nodded happily before perching herself on his hard chest, cutely kissing his jaw, “and I love you, dada.”

“Sam.” He affectionately punched his sleeping husband’s shoulder, smirking when he heard him groan, “she likes the swing.”

[biaswreckingfics]

To Be Replaced: Part 1

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 2.5k

“I’m so sorry, babe… You know I want to be home more than anything, but it’s unfortunately not up to me…” your boyfriend sadly tells you through the phone.

“I know, Baek… It’s okay. It’s just one more week and then you’ll be right back home with me.” You hide the sadness you’re feeling from your voice, so he doesn’t worry about you and feel guilty for the toll his career sometimes takes.

He suddenly whines in your ear. “Why does a week feel so long all of a sudden?”

You listen as your boyfriend of three years continues to pout into the phone. Of course, you were sad that he was going to be gone longer than the two of you had originally planned, but you had learned long ago to be understanding in these types of situations. You’ve grown used to dealing with traveling delays when it came to your boyfriend’s schedule. He was an idol and he was certainly “booked and busy”, and often being pulled in eight different directions. You had learned to just go along for the ride to make it easier on him.

This time it was no different. EXO had just wrapped up another world tour, and SM had found time to schedule more appearances for them before they came home. The only upside you could find in this scenario was more exposure for the boys and more interviews for you to watch online which is exactly what you would be doing in your now open week.

“Oh! Babe, I gotta go. There’s this stylist here who has shown me some really cool design ideas, and I think we’re going to collaborate for Privé! I’ll call you later! Love you!”

Your boyfriend suddenly hangs up and you pull your phone away from your ear to look at it. A small smile finds its way on your face thanks to your boyfriend’s antics. Privé was his baby and he had been eager to find inspiration for a new line for his clothing company. Fortunately, it sounded like he had finally found some.

A week later

You pick up the throw pillow on the couch and fluff it up for the third time while you wait for your boyfriend to arrive home. It was an anxious habit you had somehow developed. Whenever Baekhyun was gone for long periods of time, you wanted him to come home to a neat and tidy apartment. It lowered his stress levels and opened up time for the two of you to be together instead of worrying about a dirty house.

You at least hoped he was coming home today. You had hardly spoken to him in the past week, assumingly because he was busy with schedules and trying to finally catch up on sleep. The last you heard; his plane was arriving at 5pm. Which was 20 minutes ago, you note as you look at the clock on the wall.

Your phone rings and you pull it out of your back pocket and check the caller ID. A smile crosses your features as you glance at the name before answering the phone.

“Hello, Oh Sehun.”

“Hey, we’re just about to leave the airport and I’m already thinking about food. Want to go get dinner?”

“My boyfriend, who I haven’t seen in months, is about to be home. I promise you; dinner is the last thing on my mind right now.”

Sehun makes a disgusted sound in your ear. “I definitely don’t need to hear about you and Baekhyun���s dirty sex life. A ‘no’ would’ve been fine.”

“I wasn’t…” you sigh and glance around the apartment while trying to find patience. “Whatever… No, thank you, Sehun. Please, eat something delicious for me.”

You can almost hear the smirk in his voice when he says, “There’s a joke there… but I’ll let it slide this time. Let’s get together soon, okay?”

“Absolutely, but before you go… Baekhyun is with you, right?” you can’t help but ask.

Sehun pauses at your odd question before slowly asking, “Where else would he be?”

You sink down on the couch once you hear the question he bounces back at you. Obviously, Baekhyun would be with them. “Sorry, dumb question. I just haven’t heard from him in a while, so I wasn’t sure what his schedule was.”

“Why haven’t you heard from him? Did you guys get into a fight or something?”

Your head jerks back in confusion. It was rare for Baekhyun and you to get into an argument, and as your best friend, Sehun knew that.

“No? He was probably just too busy to call.”

Sehun snorts. “I doubt that. We had more free time than any of us expected. Horrible planning on SM’s part, but I won’t bother you with the boring details right now.”

Your brows furrow as even more confusion fills you. What did he mean they had more free time than expected, and if that was the case, why hasn’t Baekhyun called or texted you? You quietly voice your thoughts out loud and Sehun hears you.

“I mean… he was with Maya a lot, but I assume he would’ve talked to you too?”

You lean back into the couch and run the name through your head before coming up empty. “Who’s Maya?”

Rustling from Sehun’s end fills your ears before you hear the sound of a car door shutting. Chanyeol’s deep voice is heard in the background before Sehun responds.

“She’s some designer that was working with one of our stylists. She offered to help Baekhyun design some things for Privé. Didn’t he tell you?”

You hear Chanyeol ask why Sehun is talking about Maya before it must click into place who he is talking to, and he’s suddenly yelling hi to you.

From the sounds of it, the boys knew who she was, so she must be legit. Good. You were happy Baekhyun had someone to help him come up with some new designs. Hopefully, she can help him bring his visions to life, and help him design something really cool.

Sehun and you stay on the phone and talk for a while until you hear keys fumbling against your apartment door. Your heart shoots into your throat and you jump up from the couch in excitement, telling Sehun you have to go and hanging up while waiting for Baekhyun to enter. You hadn’t physically seen your boyfriend in months, and you couldn’t freaking wait to have him back in your arms.

Baekhyun pushes open the door and before he can get all the way inside, you’re running for him and throwing your arms around his neck. He lets out a noise at the impact, but his arms quickly wrap around your waist and he squeezes you tightly.

“I missed you, love.” He mumbles in your ear.

You lean back and find his lips, mumbling a quick “I missed you too” before finally kissing him. The kiss turns more passionate than you intend and Baekhyun blindly closes the apartment door with his foot before turning around and pushing you against it.

“God, I missed the way you taste.”

“Well, I’m right here, Baek, and I’m all yours.”

His eyes darken with lust as a mischievous smirk grows on his face. “Good, because we have a lot of missed time to make up for.”

---------------------------------------

A few hours later, Baekhyun and you are laying tangled up in your sheets and catching each other up on everything that had taken place the past couple of months. You told him about the boring things that happened with your work and family, and he shared with you the antics his members pulled while on tour.

When he tells you about Maya, you take in his excitement and the way he’s animatedly talking about all the ideas they were able to come up with, with a smile. It’s been a long time since you’ve seen Baekhyun this excited about anything, and it was nice to see that light in his eyes again.

“I’m telling you. She. Is. A genius. I don’t know how she came up with half of her designs, but I’m so happy she offered to help me.”

The way Baekhyun speaks about her makes her seem larger than life, and almost out of this world cool, and the way his heartbeat speeds up because of how excitedly he is talking is nice. Did it bother you that he was talking so eagerly about another woman while the two of you were naked in bed? Maybe the slightest twinge of something was there, but you were more happy for him than anything else.

“I’m happy you got a chance to work together. It sounds like she helped you out a lot.” You smile up at him from where your head was resting on his chest.

“Oh, we’ll have plenty more chances.” When you stare up at him curiously, he continues. “She’s been hired to be one of EXO’s stylists.”

You pause, slightly surprised with the information. “They hired her just like that?”

“I gave her a good recommendation.” Baekhyun shrugs underneath you. “She’s already said she’s willing to keep working with me, so now we’ll have even more time together.”

You stare up at him and take in his beautiful features. When he looks down at you, his glowing face smiles and he kisses your forehead. You can see his excitement at the fact that he gets to continue working with her and you couldn’t be happier that he found someone else he can bounce his ideas off of. He could only ask your opinion so many times before your ideas became stale, and you knew next to nothing about high fashion, so she would be way more helpful than you could ever hope to be.

The next day, you join Baekhyun at a shoot he and the other EXO members had scheduled. You found it hard to believe SM couldn’t give them at least a couple of days off before making them work again, but the selfish part of you was happy because now you could see all the guys at once.

As soon as you walk in, there’s a flurry of movement as directors and lighting men work to get everything set up. You stick close to Baekhyun like usual to stay out of everyone’s way, and quickly spot the guys hanging off to the side on a couple of couches. Baekhyun and you walk hand-in-hand in their direction before a beautiful blonde intercepts you.

“Hey, Baek. I have some more designs for you to look at.” The strange girl flashes a blinding smile at him as her hand comes up to grip his arm. She pulls him in a different direction without so much as a glance at you and he immediately lets go of your hand to follow her.

You stand there stunned as you try to figure out what just happened before looking over at the pair to see them lost in their own world. Judging by the words she spoke, you assume the girl is Maya, but you couldn’t know for sure because Baekhyun didn’t introduce you. It was almost like he forgot you were even there.

You shake it off and continue your trek over to the rest of the guys who all greet you the second you’re within earshot. You see an open spot next to Sehun and immediately drop down into it, catching his attention.

“I see you met Maya.” He dryly comments.

“Did I?” You respond, using as much sarcasm as you can muster. Could you call what just happened a meeting?

Sehun glances over to make sure he was talking about the right person and looks back at you with a roll of his eyes. “They were like that the whole time abroad too. It’s like she’s fucking sticky tape.”

You look back over at Maya and take a better look at her appearance. She was gorgeous with long legs that seemed to go on for miles. She gave off European model vibes like she was putting “I’m too sexy and cool, so don’t talk to me” in the air. You feel a twinge of insecurity and immediately stamp it out. Sure, she is gorgeous, but Baekhyun loves you and you had no doubts about that.

“She looks like a model.” You comment causing Sehun to snort.

“She was a model. I guess she decided designing was more her passion.

Oh…

You spend the rest of the day hanging out with the guys or playing on your phone. You had hardly seen Baekhyun since you got here. Maybe a quick “hi” once or twice before Maya was pulling him away again, so you were beyond relieved when the crew was wrapping up for the day and Baekhyun suddenly appeared next to you.

“Hey, babe. Sorry I’ve been so busy today. You were probably bored out of your mind.” He says while he leans over the couch and hugs you from behind.

“It’s okay.” You pat his hand before standing up and walking around the couch to him. “The guys kept me plenty entertained… but I’m ready to finally be with you...”

He pulls you into his arms and gives you a tight hug that you want to stay wrapped up in forever. However, you’re pulled out of the moment when you feel someone’s hand graze your arms as they touch Baekhyun’s lower back. A throat clearing has you and Baekhyun looking behind him, and you meet the eyes of none other than Maya.

Baekhyun quickly moves over to your side and wraps an arm around your waist before turning to face the newcomer. “Hey, Maya! There’s someone I want you to meet. This is Y/N.”

Her expression is unreadable as she looks you up and down like she’s appraising you.  “What do you do for the company?”

You blink a couple of times at her indifferent tone while Baekhyun gives her a weird look.

“Y/N’s my girlfriend… I told you about her on tour.”

Her face changes and you see the exact moment a mask slides into place. She gives you a fake smile while she waves away Baekhyun’s words.

“Oh, right. The girlfriend.” She lets out a light giggle that sounds completely out of place. “I guess I just had other things on my mind when you were talking about her.”

You stare at her as her and Baekhyun continue to talk and try to ignore the bad vibes you were getting from the introduction you just had with her. So many thoughts ran through your head, but you take one look at Baekhyun and decide to keep them to yourself. He looked happier and more relaxed than he has in a while, and you didn’t want anything to ruin that.

You couldn’t be happier that he has found someone to share his passion with… but a part of you was incredibly bummed out that it was no longer you.

Tagging: @gyukult @marovekian1 @making-me-blush @softforqiankun​ @sebootyforlife​ @nothingbutadeadesceane​ @cardtak​ @brie02​ @jungkooksworld18​ @insta1010​ @suhappysuho​ @purple-bell​

[hangovercurse]

The Things We Can’t Tell Pete About iv

You approach Pete about your situation and deal with the aftermath.

Colson Baker X Reader

Warnings: Angst, cursing

Word Count: 1380

| i | ii | iii | v |

You texted Pete later that night, telling him to meet you for lunch the next day. He obliges, meeting you at your favorite Staten Island diner. The conversation started easy enough, talking about work, your mom, light stuff.

But then you shifted the conversation to what you really needed to talk to your brother about, Colson.

“So, Petey, dude, my favorite brother.” You started, a smile on your face. He raised an eyebrow at you, knowing you were up to something.

“I am your only brother, Y/N.” He muttered, but let you continue.

“So, just say, hypothetically, one of your lovely sisters, your favorite sister, actually, went on a date with someone you knew.” You started, “someone that you considered a friend, maybe even a good friend.” Pete’s expression darkened, his eyes squinting at you, but you continued. “And like, she really, really likes this guy and he likes her. How would you react?”

You knew it wasn’t the most subtle way to go about the situation, but Pete would figure you out if you went about it any other way. Might as well rip off the band-aid.

“Are you fucking serious, Y/N?” His tone was dark, angry. You weren’t expecting him to be happy, but you weren’t expecting him to be this angry either. His tone actually scared you.

You moved back in your chair, taking in a sharp breath. “I’m not saying it happened, I’m just asking how you would react.”

You could see the clench in Pete’s jaw, and you swallowed deeply. “I told you, I don’t want you getting involved with any of my friends.” You nodded, hoping he would end there, but he didn’t. “I’m serious, my friends are off limits. If you sleep with any of them, I will never forgive you.”

“Okay, got it.” You mumbled, regretting everything immediately.

Pete sighed, getting up from the table and throwing down cash to cover the meals. “I can’t believe you would even think about it. How fucking selfish can you get?”

Your mouth dropped, shocked at his accusation. “Oh, fuck off, Pete. Don’t talk to me about being selfish you prick.” You stood up too, grabbing your jacket and purse. “I can do whatever I want.”

He scoffed, “sure you can, but don’t expect me to take care of you when your heart gets broken. I can’t wait to hear you tell me I’m right.”

You shook your head angrily, “Whatever, forget I even asked. I forgot you’re an unreasonable, unstable asshole.” You pushed past him and walked out the door of the diner, heading to your apartment.

You knew it was wrong of you to use his mental illness against him, but he has no right to say who you can and can’t date.

Do you regret what you said? Yes. Will you apologize? Absolutely not.

When you got to your apartment you texted Colson.

Call me when u can.

Within moments his caller ID appeared on your phone screen.

“Hey, what’s up?” He asked, his voice grainy through the phone.

You sighed, sitting down on your couch, “Pete and I got in a fight. He’s being an unreasonable asshole and I just can’t deal with it right now.”

Colson hummed sadly, letting out a breath of air. “Do you want me to come over?”

You smiled at his suggestion, “I mean if you’re offering…” you trailed off, raising your voice at the end of your sentence.

He chuckled through the phone, “I’ll be there in 10, princess.”

You bit your lip, excited at the thought of you and Colson being alone in your apartment… together. You cleaned up your apartment a little bit and freshened yourself up. When you heard the knock on your door, your heart fluttered. You skipped over and opened the door to reveal the blond beauty that constantly occupied your mind.

“Hey.” You said quietly, grabbing his hand and pulling him into your apartment.

He towered over you, hands in yours. “Hi.” He whispered, eyes staring straight into your soul. “You are much happier than I thought you’d be.” He chuckled, and it was the most beautiful sound you’d ever heard.

You shrugged, closing the door, and pulling him towards the couch. “I was upset at first, but now I’m just kind of pissed off at him. It’s whatever though, all I care about is that you’re here.” You smiled, leaning up and pressing a soft kiss to his lips.

He gladly kissed you back, laughing against your lips as you sat down on the couch, pulling him down with you. “What did he say?” Colson asked and you rolled your eyes.

“He just said I was being selfish and shit. He blew it way out of proportion. I mean, what’s wrong with us being happy?” You asked, a small pout on your lips.

Colson’s expression went from giddy to serious, concern in his eyes. “Y/N I don’t want to be the reason you and Pete fight, I told you that.”

You scoffed, “you’re not. Pete and I are fighting because he’s being a stubborn asshole who can’t accept that there’s a world outside of him.”

Colson frowned, “but all this came from you asking if he’d approve of our relationship?”

“Yeah, but that’s not the point.” You sighed, hands running up and down his arms.

He shook his head, “that is the point. I don’t wanna do this if it means you and Pete are mad at each other.”

Your tone betrayed your emotions that you were trying to hide. “Can you stop saying that shit? It’s like you’re looking for a fucking way out of this.” You stood up, letting out a huff. You turned to face away from him, feeling tears coming to your eyes. You did not want to cry in front of him.

He stood up, wrapping his arms around you. “Y/N, listen to me.” He paused, looking for a sign that you were doing so. You just turned your head down, hiding the emotions on your face. “I’m not looking for a way out, okay? I want this. Like really fucking want this. Bu-“

You cut him off, “just end the sentence there. You don’t need a but. You want this, I want this. It shouldn’t matter what anyone else thinks.”

He sighed, continuing with his original spiel, “But, I refuse to be the reason you and Pete get in a fight. He talks to me about how close you two are all the time. I know you’re frustrated right now, but he’s your brother. I’m just some dude. As much as I hate to admit it, there’s plenty of me’s lined up for you.”

You rolled your eyes, trying to wiggle out of his grasp but he kept his arms tight around you. “You’re gorgeous, you’ll find tons of great guys, but you only get one brother. Okay?”

You turned around to face him, the tears visible in your eyes making his heart crack. “I don’t want someone else; I want you.” You whined. You realized you were acting stupid; you’d only been on one date with him. But it felt so right, and you hated thinking that something great was gonna be taken from you and there was nothing you could do about it.

Colson smiled sadly at you, forehead pressing against yours. “I hate this.” He mumbled and you nodded in agreement. “But I don’t think we can do this.”

A tear fell from your eye. Colson reached up to wipe it away but you stepped away from him, out of reach. “This isn’t fair.” You muttered, sniffling. “I finally find something good, for once, and he rips it from me before I can even give it a chance.”

Colson shook his head, stepping towards you, “no, this isn’t Pete’s fault.” He whispered. “This is on me, okay? I’m ending it.”

You turned away from him, embarrassment covering you like a blanket. “I’m the one walking away. I’m calling this quits, not Pete. “

You bit your lip as you heard him walk towards the door. He paused, hand on the handle, looking back at you. “You’re giving up.” You mumbled, just loud enough for him to hear it.

“Yeah, I am.” He said before turning the handle and leaving.

[tomtenadia]

Fire in her veins - a Island Dreams AU oneshot

So, yesterday Island Dream reached the amazing milestone of 5k hits on AO3. For me, it means the world especially because ID has a special place in my heart. It was my first long Rowaelin, set in a place that I adore. It’s more than just a story. It’s set in a part of Scotland that has completely stolen my heart.

So, to celebrate I asked for prompts and @whimsicallyreading​ gave me a brilliant one.

“Aelin accidentally distracts Rowan and their stove catches on fire 🥰 would be funny to see the ID crew interact with a Fire Department 🤣”

inspiration hit in an instant. This fic is set about three years after the epilogue. The twins are 7 and Dalamar is 4. The  story has a very Freyja-centred ending, mostly because she is my favourite. She is wild and fierce like her mother and she is funny.  (Don’t get me wrong I adore Morrigan and Dalamar too. They are calmer and adorable in their own way.)

If you are new to Island Dream you can find it HERE

Well, without much further ado I will leave you to the story.

Rowan had a busy day at work. The bookshop had become very popular in town and business was good especially since Aelin had convinced him a while before to set up an internet page and an online ordering system. It had taken a while to really kick in but now he was basically serving the whole of the Hebrides and he had started getting orders as well from some remote location on the western highlands. Aelin had been right. She was the one who had started his Facebook page after all. He hated the whole thing - he had even deleted the profile he had created for fun, but he could not deny that it was handy for business. He had started promoting his events, he had hosted some indie authors and also had started a reading club at the weekend. He was proud of the job he had done. And now, with his aunt he was working on another stage. Her cafe had been shut for a few months after the last bad storm and flooding had caused some heavy damage. So when the bill for repairs had come Maeve knew it was too much and had decided to close to the dismay of the locals who loved her cakes and food. But Rowan had come up with a plan. The unit next to his shop had been vacant for a while so, he offered his aunt a deal. She could reopen her cafe inside his bookshop and they could merge the two units together. It had taken some convincing but in the end Maeve had accepted and the works had officially started. 

Life was busy but he had never been happier. The twins were seven and were in P2 and Rowan could not believe how quickly they were growing up. Freyja was still as wild and school had been a challenge. She hated being forced to sit at a desk. Hated the uniform. Hated school, but apart from her rebel attitude, the teachers kept telling them that she was a bright pupil and both Rowan and Aelin relaxed. Morrigan, on the other hand was the opposite of her twin. She adored school and was still the quiet one in the family. Dalamar was still at nursery and was meant to start school the following year. 

On that day Evalin had picked up the kids and brought them to the shop, something they adored. Then Rowan had taken them to swimming practice. He had kept his part time job as swimming instructor and the kids had followed in his footsteps. The twins being older were taking proper swimming classes while Dalamar just joined the club for the wee ones and splashed happily in the water while his sisters learnt to swim. When Aelin was not busy at the hospital she would accompany them and play with Dalamar. 

Usually the swimming classes were enough to exhaust his kids that he could cook in peace while waiting for Aelin to get back. That evening she had texted him that they had a last minute emergency and was running late. 

He tried for the umpteenth time to concentrate on a recipe for the evening when Freyja barged in the kitchen running followed by her brother and screaming that a dragon was chasing her. 

Rowan grabbed his daughter and lifted her in his arms burying his face in her belly causing the girl to laugh hard “dad, the dragon” and wiggled in her father’s arms to get free but Rowan did not let go. He just walked to Dalamar and offered him his free arm “hop on, oh mighty dragon.” The boy grabbed his father’s forearm swinging like a monkey and Rowan walked into the living room, his daughter under one arms and his son swinging from the other like a jungle creature.

Morrigan joined the chaos a moment later. Rowan kneeled and she climbed on his back.

In that moment he heard the door of the house open and an instant later Aelin waltzed in the living room and saw her husband completely overwhelmed by their children. She laughed at the scene “what is happening in here?” Her hands on the hips.

“A dragon is following me.” Shouted Freyja, with still too much energy in her. 

“I am not a dragon, I am a monkey.” Replied Dalamar, swinging a bit more from Rowan’s arm.

“And what are you doing, Morrigan?”

“The dragon has burned the floor.”

Rowan moved to the sofa and started to deposit the kids down “come on, let dad cook dinner. And don’t shout too much, mum is tired.”

The kids slowly climbed down their father and went to greet Aelin who hugged them all “did you all had a nice day? Did you go swimming tonight?”

“Yes.” The two girls shouted “Dad taught us how to jump in head first.”

Rowan roared with laughter “and they still are two clumsy little terrors who smash their bellies.”

“Be careful with that.” Said Aelin in full doctor mode “that type of jump is very risky, they can snap their neck if do not enter correctly.”

Rowan took a step towards his wife and wrapped his arms around her “I know. I would never put our daughters in danger.”

“Good,” she gave him a chaste kiss “now let mum take a shower and dad cook?”

“Tha.” Replied the three kids in unison.

The kids climbed back on the carpet Dalamar going back to his bricks, Morrigan to her colouring book and Freyja just kept swinging her plastic sword fighting some imaginary monster. While Aelin disappeared in the bathroom, Rowan finally managed to get back to the kitchen and think about dinner. It was getting late for the kids and he knew they would soon start to become agitated again and start bellowing for food. He grabbed a towel and threw it on his shoulder and then started preparing the ingredients. He was preparing veggie burgers made out of cous cous and chickpeas. The kids loved them. He was the one who cooked the most in the house since his hours were far more reliable and he had been doing his best to cook healthy meals, to Aelin displeasure as she complained that there were always far to many vegetables in his dishes. But she was okay with the kids following a healthy diet. Morrigan was pescatarian. The girl could not stand eating meat and last time Rowan had tried to give her beef or chicken, the poor girl had been sick all night. Whereas fish, she loved it and she was a happy veggie eater like her father. Dalamar would occasionally eat meat but with very little enthusiasms whereas Freyja was just like her mother. She would eat anything on her plate.

He was busy preparing the patties when he felt Aelin’s hand around his waist and a gentle kiss on his back.

“How the shift at the hospital?” He asked while finishing the patties and heating up the oil in the pan.

“Long.” She sighed against his chest “your dear wife might need some adult cuddling tonight.”

Rowan laughed and turned in her arms, throwing his towel on the counter. A deep kiss that, after seven years of marriage still made her toes curl. Aelin’s hands linked behind his neck and Rowan pushed her against the island and Aelin moaned in appreciation.

Until all hell broke loose.

The smoke alarm pierced the quiet of the room with its grating sound and when Aelin opened her eyes again she saw a quickly spreading fire behind Rowan.

“Rowan!” She shouted.

He turned quickly and looked for something to stop the fire but he was paralysed and he knew enough that water was not an option.

Aelin was already on the phone with the emergency services while Rowan grabbed another towel and tried to smother the fire with the only result of burning his hand.

“Ro, fire department is on its way.” She took his hand “a bad first degree burn.”

He was about to go and put it under the sink but Aelin stopped him.

At the deafening sound, the kids burst in the kitchen but Aelin pushed them away, taking Rowan with her “Come on kids let’s go back to the carpet.”

Morrigan and Dalamar went in their mother arms scared by the commotion. Freyja was standing just near the sofa looking at the fire in the kitchen in a daze.

Rowan noticed her and grabbed his daughter in his arms, ignoring the searing pain in his hand “That is dangerous.”

“It’s pretty.” Said the little girl.

It wasn’t long after that the fire department arrived. 

A woman with blonde hair, who was clearly in charge gave some orders and the team had the fire out in no time.

“Is anyone hurt?” Asked her, joining the family in the living room.

“My husband. First degree burn on his hand.” Replied Aelin pointing at Rowan leaning against the back of the sofa.

The woman called over the radio for a paramedic and Rowan scoffed claiming that he did not need one but at Aelin glared at him and he shut up.

And while Morrigan and Dalamar were still on the carpet quite shaken by the ordeal, Freyja was moving toward the tall woman. She reached for the hem of her bunker gear and pulled, claiming attention.

“Hello little one.” Said the woman kneeling to be at eye level with the girl “There’s no more fire. We fixed it. You don’t have to be scared.”

Freyja pouted “I was not scared.”

The woman laughed and brushed her silver hair and the girl grinned.

“Are you a fire woman?” She asked, looking at the adult in front of her with deep admiration.

In that instant another woman and a man came through and gave her a report, the woman nodded and got back to the girl in front of her “Yes, I am.”

Freyja beamed “can I be a fire woman too?”

The fire captain placed her heavy hat on the girl’s head which was gigantic on her but Freyja shouted for her parents but Aelin was busy speaking to the man and her dad was in the capable hands of a paramedic who was tending to his hand.

“You can be anything you want to be.” Said the woman softly, taking her hat back then she stood and Freyja bent her head upwards to stare at the woman while she walked to her parents.

“There is some damage and you will have to replace the stove and probably paint the wall near it.” She explained “I would suggest to have a fire blanket and a small fire extinguisher for cooking oils. They can easily be found online and they are good to have in emergencies.”

“We will. Thank you so much.”

The woman nodded and left with her team, while the paramedic was finishing fixing up Rowan’s hand “Keep it clean and change the bandage regularly. There are ointments that you can use to help the healing process. If it gets worse make sure you go to the hospital.” Rowan looked at Aelin and grinned “thank you. My wife is an A&E doctor, I am sure she will keep me right.”

“That’s why she looks familiar. Western Isles hospital, isn’t it? You are Aelin.”

“Hi Sarah.”

 Once the house was quiet again Aelin relaxed for a moment and Rowan went to Morrigan and Dalamar while Freyja was still staring at the door where the fire department had left.

“What is it, my love?”

Freyja turned at her mother’s voice, her face beaming with unbridled joy. They were all shaken by the evening, but her fierce girl was actually smiling.

“That was a fire woman.”

“Yes, my darling.”

“I want to be a fire woman too.”

Aelin crouched down to meet her daughter’s eyes and brushed some hair off her face “you can be anything you want to be, mo chridhe.  Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

Freyja hugged her mother then ran to her father, sister and brother shouting that she was going to be a fire woman.

Rowan joined Aelin a moment later and pulled her to his chest “I am sorry.”

“For what?”

“I got distracted.”

Aelin lightly punched him in the chest “I am the one who distracted you.”

He sighed “we have no dinner.”

“I’ll phone mum and ask her if we can go to her place.”

Aelin disappeared and Rowan stood in the kitchen looking at the mess. The fire had quickly spread and a part of the counter was damaged too. Everything was covered in foam and wasn’t even sure if it was safe to use the oven. The patties lay like burned blobs at the side. 

Aelin came back a moment later “mum is happy to have us. She is probably making dinner already.” She tugged her husband “let’s go, buzzard. We’ll think about it tomorrow.”

Once they finished getting the kids ready they went back to their room “So, Freyja wants to be a firefighter. She was staring at the fire in marvel and was amazed at seeing the two women firefighters.”

Rowan pulled Aelin to his chest “She is fearless like you. She has fire in her. I can totally see her become a badass firefighter.”

Aelin hugged him back in silence.

“She is our wee fireheart.”

Twelve years later, when Freyja finished her training at the fire academy and was assigned at the firehouse in Stornoway Aelin and Rowan happily looked back at that night knowing that it had changed the life of their daughter and were never happier of a fire in their house.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

The Man in his Castle

Warnings: noncon sex. Let’s not be fools here. You know what I write.

This is dark!Charles Blackwood and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: A co-ed discovers that money is still king.

Note: Charles is fun because he’s already horrible. I know my summary sucks but I hope you all enjoy this. It takes place in the 1960s so keep that in mind and enjoy! But let me know what you think in reblog or reply and slap a like on there <3

There were more than a dozen girls squeezed into the windowless classroom in the basement of Victory Hall. The book club had grown quite a bit since your first week on campus. The Brownies, you called yourself. An ironic play upon a lifetime of ridicule.

Every Friday night you met in some abandoned room bartered off the registrar and set to discussing your most recent read. Sheila was the leader; bolder than you as she fostered your sprout of an idea. She was cooler, calmer, and by all means, more radical. And she was a senior.

The flock of freshmen looked up to her and the few other older girls in the group. She had brought along with her, Linda and Patty; the former with her stiff turtlenecks and the latter her faded beret. These were the types your mother had warned you against. Peddling their liberalism in the name of Kennedy and Kruschev.

That week, your group had chosen Miller’s famed play, The Crucible; still relevant despite a decade past. Though the red scare had faded to orange, there was still a breath of suspicion in the air. As people marched in the streets and sat-in at diners and cafes, the old breed was growing nervous. The world was about to change, with or without them.

You sat amid the circle with your worn copy against your knee. You took turns reading the lines and pausing to discuss the intricate and yet overt allusions made by the playwright. The furor of the blacklist which still lingered in the air. A paranoia much broader than years before. No longer just the Reds, but all who spoke of equality and freedom; no longer exclusive to a single group. The same tensions which kept you in the basement with the dingy old desks.

You couldn’t help but smile at the group of girls. When you’d arrived on campus, you were certain you’d be the same loner as before. Solitary nights spent barricaded in your dorm only to lose yourself in the crowd of the lecture hall. 

But Sheila had changed that. She was in your elective Lit class, filling a void in her audit so that she could graduate on time. You had lost yourself in a discussion of Marx and the mounting tensions with the East; not that they ever really subsided. 

Then she invited you to meet Linda and Patty for a drink. Your lack of ID didn’t keep you from the chance to make friends as she knew the doorman by name. That was when you mentioned the club. It was just you and your friend, Elsie. Not really a club, more so a pair of girls with nothing better to do. But Sheila liked it and the next week, she had six new girls to add to your duo.

Now, you were a full blown corps. The three seniors and at least fifteen freshmen, a few in between to fill out the circle. 

Sheila snapped her book shut and declared the end of the night as she checked her watch. 

“We’ll finish next week,” She chimed. “Granted we don’t devolve so easily again.”

The girls giggled and began to pack up. You stood and shoved your book into your leather bag. Sheila stood with Linda at the back of the circle and Patty offered a goodbye to each girl as they left. Most did so in pairs or trios. Safety in numbers.

Your dorm wasn’t far and so you would keep a brisk pace with your keys in hand. You turned and Sheila called to you before you could reach the door. You spun back and neared her and Linda.

“Hey, you need a walking partner?” She asked. “Me and Linda are head down the The Cask. We’ll be headed past yours.”

“If you’re headed that way,” You accepted eagerly.

You helped rearrange the chairs and desk with the three seniors. Patty left on her own as Sheila locked the door. You walked on her right as Linda kept to her left and made your way out of the depths of Victory Hall. The night was cool but not bitter. You pulled your collar up as you passed between the carefully trimmed hedges.

“You sure you don’t want to come for a drink?” Linda asked. “Seeing as Patty ditched us.”

“Oh, you know she has that boy waiting for her,” Sheila countered.

“Um, no, I have an early morning,” You replied. “But thanks.”

“What about next weekend?” Sheila asked.

“Next weekend?” You wondered.

“Wanna come to a party?”

“A… a senior party?” You glanced over at her as you tucked your hands in your pockets.

“Oh, no, it’s not on campus,” She trilled. “But I think you’d like it.”

“Off-campus?” You said surprised. “Really?”

“A bit of an older crowd but…” She lowered her voice, “Of a similar mind as us.”

Your eyes widened. You blinked at her and she laughed.

“Oh calm down, they’re no interlopers, merely open-minded,” She assured you. “You have to realize that this little club, that’s a children’s game. If you’re serious, these are the people you need to rub shoulders with.”

“I don’t know. It’s pretty seedy downtown and the last time--”

“Downtown?” She scoffed. “Oh, this is different from that hole in the wall.”

“Where--”

“Uptown, actually,” She preened. “You know, we do have allies with money. They hide among the enemy until we can truly act.”

“I don’t know. That sounds--”

“You worry too much. It’s not illegal to meet people who think like you do,” She said. “Otherwise us Brownies would be akin to the mob.”

You laughed at yourself and watched your scuffed shoes on the sidewalk. “I guess you’re right. Um, what kind of party is it, exactly?”

“Wear something nice,” She picked a thread from your jacket. “Fancy dress hides a humble heart.”

You nodded and gripped the strap of your bag. “Sure, why not?” You shrugged.

“I’ll see you in Lit,” She stopped just outside your gate. “I’ll give you the details then. You should ask Elsie to come with you.”

“Alright,” You breathed. “Yeah, I’ll ask her.”

“Have a good night,” She sang and Linda echoed her. 

“You, too.” You smiled.

You turned and unlocked your gate as their heels continued down the pavement. You let yourself inside and listened until there was silence. You were happy to have friends, happier that you were so much alike, but the thought of a party had your stomach aflutter.

🏰

You found your only formal dress. Rather, your most formal dress. A long-sleeved black number that flared at the knee. You wore the simple silver chain your mother gifted you for your high school graduation and a pair of kitten heels. You hugged yourself with a red shawl and grabbed your purse.

Elsie waited just outside your dorm room. She looked as nervous as you felt. The lack of details gave both of you the jitters. You were two shy girls who found each other among the sea of students. You took comfort in knowing you weren’t the only one in over your head.

And Sheila would be there too. She could help you maneuver your way through this maze of etiquette and idealism.

You took a bus as far as you could but at the last stop, you were still three blocks away from the place. Blackwood Manor. Sheila’s loopy cursive marked it on the corner of paper. The house on the hill, she said, can’t miss it.

The gates towered over you as you approached. Tinted lanterns lit the walkway and you pressed the button over the small speaker box. A dull voice greeted you from the other side.

“Um, hello,” Elsie squeezed your arm as you bent to speak into the box. “We’re here for the party.”

“Par-ty?” The voice said.

“We’re friends of, uh, Sheila.” You replied nervously.

“Ah, yes, Miss Sheila.” The crackle died and the gate clicked. 

You looked to Elsie and a man in grey neared from the other side. He pulled open the gate and removed his cap as he waited for you to enter. A car drove up, its bright headlights washed over you, as you walked up the drive and the gates man spoke with its occupants.

At the front door, you met with a man with grey hair and the same even tone that rose from the speaker. He took your shawl and Elsie’s coat and directed you to the next room. You detached Elsie from your arm and gave her a look. She smiled tensely and smoothed the front of her dress.

The sparkle of the chandelier drew your eyes first. The light refracted from the crystals and illuminated the large room. Men in suits stood around with drinks in hand and chattered. You heard the next guests enter behind you and stepped out of their way.

You spotted Sheila in the far corner, a broad pair of shoulders left her barely visible. There were several other girls you recognized; Linda. Darla and Colleen, two other Brownies, and even a couple girls from your Lit class. Every women in the room was barely that; they were all bright-eyed co-eds amid a conclave of stiff-lipped men.

You felt a chill crawl up your spine but resisted the shiver. You were just anxious about all these strangers. It was natural to be a little nervous.

Elsie followed you across the room and smiled at Sheila over the shoulder of the man she spoke to. She waved you over and the man turned to look at you. His blue eyes flicked from you to Elsie and back again. His expression was placid as he buttoned his jacket.

“Charles, these are my friends,” She introduced you and Elsie, “And this is Charles Blackwood, our host.”

He seemed to recall himself and shook your hand and then Elsie’s. His grip was firm and his expression unbreakable. He was entirely unimpressed by you and your plain black dress.

“You have a beautiful house,” You offered. “I don’t think I’ve ever been anywhere so… grand.”

“It was my grandfather’s,” He said tersely as his eyes explored the room. “Sheila, if you’ll excuse me, I must speak with Gerald.”

“Of course,” She kissed his cheek and his lip curled before he walked away. “Sorry about him,” Sheila turned to you. “He’s a bit antsy, you know? Always is on nights like these.”

“I never…” You looked at Elsie as her eyes bounced around in wonder, “I never would think anyone who lived like this would you know, agree with us.”

“Oh, but we already know money isn’t everything,” She said. “You know, these men, they know that and they want to use their money for good. They want to make sure that students like us make it through college and go on to speak our truth to the world.”

She stopped a man passing by and took a wine glass from his tray. She offered you it and grabbed another for Elsie and herself. She batted her lashes at the waiter and returned her attention to you.

“Which is why you should loosen up and talk to some of these men,” She advised. “They are much preferable to the boys on campus and much more powerful. My second year, I had my tuition paid in full by one of Charles’ friends.”

“Wow,” Elsie gasped. “Really?”

“Consider it a grant,” Sheila explained. “Spread the wealth, right?”

“I suppose…” You uttered.

“Oh, there’s Patty,” Sheila perked up. “I knew she’d be the last one here. Pardon me a moment.”

“Alright,” You turned and watched her go as she waved over the heads to her friend. 

You brought the glass to your lips and the alcohol burned your nostrils. Your stomach turned and you lowered the flute. Elsie drank deeply as you glanced around. A man with thick silver hair and a sharp aquiline nose stared at you from across the room.

You fidgeted and slipped behind Elsie to set your glass down.

“You should take it easy,” You warned her as she gulped down the wine. 

🏰

The man with silver hair introduced himself as Harry. You weren’t fond of him as he talked of his new car and something about a cottage up north. You were confused. Sheila intimated that these people were like you; maybe not communists are heart, but left-leaning at least. They surely didn’t sound like it.

You glanced around for the umpteenth time and frowned. You didn’t see Sheila or Linda or Patty. Elsie was with a man in a striped suit, Darla and Colleen sipped from glasses as they listened to a pair of men banter, and you were stuck in the corner with this grey-haired boor.

You excused yourself, claiming to need the powder room, and walked along the wall as you searched the room. The seniors were gone. And something else caught your eye. The men drank from their stout tumblers and the women, more aptly girls, all held champagne flute. Yours was still on the table, untouched.

You neared Elsie and excused your interruption as you turned her away from her companion. You lowered your voice.

“Have you seen Sheila?” You asked.

She shook her head and wobbled. She giggled as she steadied herself with your arm. “Nope!”

“How much of that have you had?” You took her glass from her.

“This is only my…. Third,” She counted on her fingers.

“Well, I think three is enough,” You said. “Why don’t you come to the restroom with me? Splash some water on your face?”

“No, no,” She shrugged you off. “I’m talking to Gerald.” She turned back and smiled at the balding man. “He has a fellowship.”

“Elsie,” You drew her back. “Something’s… wrong.”

“What do you mean?” She hiccuped. “It’s all quite fine, isn’t it?”

“Just…” You peeked over your shoulder. “Wait here for me, okay? Don’t go anywhere else.”

She rolled her eyes and you sighed. You left her reluctantly and stopped a waiter as you neared the main archway. You asked him where the restroom was and ducked into the hallway. You passed by the foot of the staircase towards the next and paused. 

You peered around the wall and pulled back. You slipped off your heels and looked back at the room that swirled with voices. You tiptoed to the door and tried the handle. It was locked. You searched for a mechanism but there was only the intricately wrought handle. 

You went back to the stairs and listened to the buzz from the front room. You climbed a step at a time as your ears perked up at every creak and crack. You wondered what had happened to Sheila and the others. It was unlike them to leave early. And why was the door locked?

You found a window and carefully turned the latch. You shifted it up and cringed as the wood loudly rubbed together. You stuck your head out and stared down at the grass below. There was a tree not far from you, a few windows away.

“Can I help you?” The voice frightened you and you hit your head on the window as you reeled back. You turned to your host, Charles, as he leaned against the bannister.

“I was… looking for Sheila.” You lied.

“Oh, outside?” He wondered with a smirk.

“Well, no, I just needed a breath of fresh air so I thought…” Your voice trailed off as he stood straight.

“The party’s downstairs,” He said evenly. “I’m sure you just missed her.”

You stared at him. His eyes sparkled with mischief. Your heart dropped and your heels threatened to slip from your sweaty hand.

“She’s gone,” You said. His lips curved again and he chuckled. “What’s going on here?”

He inched forward as he pushed back his jacket and shoved a hand in his pocket.

“She did her job. Delivered what she promised.” He said coolly. “Can you blame her for cutting out?”

“What--” You backed up until you were against the window ledge. “I don’t understand.”

“You tried the front door, didn’t you?” 

You blinked and your shoes fell from your grasp.

“You think you can get to that tree? Even if you moved a few windows to the left?” He got closer. “Or maybe… you think you can get past me.”

Your lips parted as his features hardened. His brow twitched as he held your gaze. He didn’t look away as he knelt and grabbed your shoe. He took your foot and shoved the kitten heel on. He did the other and stood.

“Let’s go back to the party,” He growled. “It’s only just getting started.”

🏰

You stood against the wall as the room spun. Your chest was filled with doom as you looked around at the girls in their sheath dresses and chunky heels. Many shared the same glazed look as Elsie. They swayed just a little, giggled airily, and their eyelashes drooped. They were barely awake on their feet.

The man who answered the door stood beside you. He squinted at you every now and then. Charles had told him to keep an eye on you. You watched the host of the event disappear through another doorway. You thought of the invisible lock and the tree just a few windows down.

It was that crushing sense of defeat when you knew loss was imminent but unavoidable. So you watched it slowly creep forward until finally you had to submit. You shivered and shook your head at yourself. Sheila had done this. Ensnared all these girls in whatever sick game this was.

Time dragged. You watched the servers offer their tainted champagne and the girls all too ignorant to realize that something was amiss. Your eyes stung and you gripped your purse tight. Whatever was planned, it couldn’t be good.

The clinking of metal on glass silenced the room. Your eyes were drawn with every other to the other side. The men exchanged knowing looks. The girls were confused but not suspicious. They looked to Charles as he relinquished the glass and knife to a server. He grinned at his rapt audience.

“Shall we commence with our evening?” He asked; the men nodded and mumbled in agreement. The girls frowned and wavered on their feet. “Very well. Girls…”

He waved an arm to his left and the waiters, now free of their trays, dispersed to herd the girls to the other side of the room. You were led along with them and stood in the row of drunken co-eds. For a moment, you wished you had drank the wine. That you could be as oblivious as the rest.

The girl at the head of the line was ushered forward to stand beside Charles. Her red hair hung in ringlets and her cheeks were rosy with alcohol. He asked her her name and she slurred “Carrie.” He repeated it for all to hear and shouted a number. Ten thousand.

A man raised his hand and Charles called eleven thousand. Another gestured and the number went up again. Again. Again. Carrie was visibly confused as she tried to keep up. She couldn’t. She was sold for twenty-five thousand and ushered into the arms of her buyer.

Elsie was next. She could barely stand as she struggled to keep her eyes open. Eighteen thousand for the mousy-haired girl. Colleen went for about the same and Darla was in tears as she was bartered for an even twenty. 

You were near the end of the line. You marched up to the front and bit down as you stared at the bourgeois bastards. Harry was the first to bid for you. Your stomach flipped. Then another man you hadn’t even spoken to. You could see only his hand as he reached above the crowd. 

The bids bounced back and forth, Harry cursed as he wondered who was so determined to have you. You sold for forty thousand to the faceless man. You were shown out the side door by a waiter as the last girl was brought up to stand by Charles. 

You stood alone in a long dining room with a large table and more than a dozen chairs. You turned as the doors slid closed and faced the grey-haired man who had greeted you in his monotone at the door. You thought he was the help. You grimaced at him.

“You?” You sputtered.

“No,” He said blandly. “Not me.”

“Then…” You couldn’t finish as you were certain you knew the answer.

You swallowed and spun away from him. You gripped the back of a chair and placed your purse on the table. The furor from the other room reached a peak and then began to dwindle. The grey-haired man glanced at the doors.

“I must attend to the coats,” He announced. “Do not stray. He will be mad.”

You sighed as he slipped through the door. A hand kept them from closing and you watched the doorman rush away. Charles stepped through and shut the doors. He took a breath as he turned to you. He fixed his lapels as he stopped across the table from you. 

“What?” You hissed as he stared at you.

“No… thanks?” He asked.

“Thanks?” You narrowed your eyes. “For what?”

“Don’t tell me you wanted to fuck one of those old men?”

You blanched at his language and your lip curled in revulsion. He laughed.

“Don’t worry. I only need… a maid.” He smirked.

“A maid?” You wondered.

“Cooking. Cleaning.” He tapped two fingers on the table as he spoke. “They ever write about that in your books?”

Your eyes were glossy as you gulped. You were furious, frightened, and frustrated.

“You girls think you know it all,” He scoffed. “There’s a lot they don’t put in books.”

“No, there are horror stories,” You assured him. “Of repulsive monsters and their nasty ways.”

He chuckled and rounded the table. He stopped just beside you as his hand closed over your purse. He slowly lifted the strap from your shoulders and batted your hand away before you could stop him.

“Trust me,” He said as he flipped it open and looked inside. “There is no monster like me.”

🏰

You were shown to a room with a barred window. It didn’t matter as it was in the basement and so narrow that you couldn’t hope to fit through it. The door was locked but even so, there was a man without. You could see his shadow under the door and hear him cough every now and again.

You didn’t sleep much. There was a blanket on the floor beside some dusty boxes. You sat against the wall and dozed in spurts. The night replayed in your head on a loop. Then all those moments you’d spent with Sheila. How she had lied so easily. Was she even a student? 

Didn’t matter now. The sun rose slowly through the small window and the door opened shortly after. You were given a black dress, stockings, and a pair of black shoes. Nothing else. You were taken to a shower hidden in the cellar; the water was cold and you washed quickly in the closet-like restroom.

You dressed and contemplated turning your underwear inside out. They were too worn to re-use. You left them with the rest of your clothes and emerged in your uniform. The man in black who had spent his night outside your door was mute. You weren’t sure entirely if by choice.

Your first task was to clean the main room, still dirtied from the party. The grey-haired man, Albert, told you so and recited your list of chores. The kitchen would be next and then you were to sweep the upstairs corridors and check every room in case it needed dusting or new linens.

It took you hours to tidy up after the previous nights’ guests. When the glasses were cleaned, you stacked them in the cupboards and wiped the counters. Alone, you went to the back door. It was locked too. The windows on this floor only opened two inches. You cursed.

You climbed the stairs with a broom and pan and set to the endless tedium of sweeping every corner. That took another hour, if not more. You emptied the pan downstairs in the bin and returned with a duster. 

You knocked on each door before you entered. Most were pristine and required only a touch up. When you reached the end of the next hallway, your rap was answered as the door opened from the other side. 

Charles wore only an undershirt and pants as he looked you up and down. He waved you in wordlessly. You entered and set to dusting the mantle and all its ornaments. He moved around behind you and stopped in a doorway just left of the bed.

“I expect you to do more than dust in here,” He said. “Grab some fresh linen when you get the chance.”

He slipped through the door but left it open an inch. You huffed and continued on lazily. Call it spite or your fleeting mind. You tried the window. It opened but there was no way down. You closed it and turned away.

You went to find the sheets and when you had discovered the trove of pressed and folded cotton, you returned to the room. You could hear the soft ripple of water through the small doorway. You set the sheets down at the foot of the bed. You cleared the wrinkled clothing from the chair and dropped them in the hamper.

“Girl,” Charles’ deep timbre called sternly. “Girl.”

Your cheek twitched. He knew your name. You sneered and quickly wiped it away as you neared the door. You pushed it open hesitantly as you peered through.

“Towel,” He demanded.

He sat in the deep tub, his dark hair damp and his broad chest bare above the water. You tore your eyes away and grabbed the towel from its rack. As you faced him, he stood and the water dripped down his body shamelessly. You unfolded the towel and held it up so that you could not see all of him.

“Well,” He waved you closer and snatched it from you. 

He stepped out onto the bathmat and fanned the towel around his body. You looked away quickly and a soft chuckle escaped him as he secured the towel at his waist. He passed you, his wet arm touched your sleeve and he neared the mirror as he admired his freshly shaved face.

“Did you make the bed?” He asked.

You shook your head and turned to return to the bedroom.

“Wait,” He stopped you. “That’s ‘yes, sir’ or ‘no, sir’.”

“No, sir,” You said bitterly. 

“Then you better get to it,” He rebuffed.

You swept through and moved the new sheets to the chair before you stripped the mattress. He leaned in the doorway as he watched you. You could feel him as you moved around the bed and stretched the cotton over the corners. You spread out the top sheet and replaced the quilt over top. You changed the pillowcases and fluffed them. 

Done, you bundled up the old bedding in your arm. He went to the bed and dragged his fingers along the quilt. He grasped the blankets and tore them from the mattress. 

“Tuck in the edges,” He said. “Now, fix your mistake.”

“Yes,” You gritted. “Sir.”

You dropped the old sheets in the chair once more and set to redoing your work. He stood at the foot of the bed and when you slipped past him, you felt a brush across your ass. You ignored it, content to think it was natural friction, and carried on. You could feel the heat of his gaze upon you and as you faced him, it was confirmed.

“Very nice,” He commented. “You learn… quickly.”

“Quicker than the others?” You asked. “Huh? How many have you bought? What did you do to them?”

“Oh, you’re mistaken,” He said. “I’m not a buyer, I’m a seller… but well, I decided to indulge myself last night.”

Your mouth was dry. You turned and grabbed the linen again. As you backed up, you were stopped by a figure behind you. His arm stretched out around you and he held his towel out. Slowly, he released it and it flapped to the floor.

“You don’t learn that quick though,” He mused as his hand settled on your shoulder. “You think I would spend that much money on a maid.” His fingers crawled along your neck. He gripped your jaw as he pressed himself against you. You felt the prod of his arousal through your skirt. “But it was fun to watch you try.”

“Why me?” You breathed as he gripped your arms and pulled them away from the laundry. The bundle fell to the chair and drooped down onto the floor.

“Because you’re the first to figure it out,” He answered. 

“Please,” You begged weakly as he pulled your arms back and rolled his hips so that he poked you.

“Get on the chair.” He ordered.

Your breath caught in your throat. You stood staring at the yellow wallpaper with its golden lilies. You turned slightly and he caught you. 

“No, don’t turn around.” His voice sent a shiver through you.

Your lip trembled and you lifted a knee, then the other. His hands ran up your arms and around your back. He shoved you so you caught yourself against the back of the chair. You tensed as his hands fell to your hips and over your ass.

He squeezed and stepped between your ankles so that his legs were against the seat. He ran his hands down your thighs and kneaded through the skirt. He reached the hem and slowly raised it an inch at a time. When it was higher than your stockings, your hand flew back to stop him.

He grabbed your wrist and twisted until you cried out.

“If you scream, there’s no one here who will care,” He snarled. “And they certainly won’t help you.”

He pushed your hand away and tore your skirt up over your ass. He slapped you so hard you yelped. You could feel the heat of his palm across your ass even after it was gone. He bunched your skirts around your waist and hummed in approval.

“You look nice in black,” He said, “Better out of it.”

You kept your eyes forward. You couldn’t have looked at him if you wanted. This man, this stranger, was touching you like no one had before. And he meant to do more. Because he owned you.

His hand snaked around your hip and down your pelvis. He tickled the hair there and slid lower. You tried to press your thighs together but your ankles hit his legs. He tutted and leaned against you.

“I’m being nice,” He warned. “I don’t have to be.”

You grabbed his hand and shoved it away. He struck your ass again as he stood straight. He grasped the back of your neck and pushed your head down against the back of the chair. Your fingers clutched at the cushion beside your face as he held you there.

“I told you last night,” He pinched your thigh. “I can be the worst fiend you’ve ever known.”

He pushed his knees up on the chair between yours. His fingers crawled around your hip again and along your pelvis. He pushed two down along your folds. He rubbed your bud with his middle finger as he spread your lips. He flicked and teased until your hips bucked.

“Not so bad…” He purred. “Am I?”

“Stop,” You begged as his grip tightened on your neck. “Why are you doing this?”

“I can’t just let you go,” He said. “That’d be a poor investment. Even you could see that.”

He dipped his finger inside of you and you inhaled sharply. He drew it in and out and added another. Your thighs shook and your fingers bent against the cushion.

“You don’t realize how fucking lucky you got,” He pushed his palm to your clit as he rocked his hand. “Those other men; old men, they’d fuck you for two seconds before they blew. Leave you there, unsatisfied, discarded. The girls never last long.”

He curled his fingers and moved his hand faster.

“The men get bored. Naturally, they’re greedy,” His nose tickled your ear as his breath glossed over your cheek. “Or maybe the girl gets pregnant. No good. Send her away. Don’t care where, just don’t want to hear about her ever again.” 

He nuzzled your hair as your breaths grew laboured. You found it hard to resist the heat that radiated from his touch. You shook as you tried to force the ripples back down.

“So, you keep me happy, girl,” He sneered. “And you might just last.”

You squealed as you came. You were ashamed and astounded. You’d never felt so… much. Never felt anything so deeply. You quivered around his hand and he slowly drew away and wiped his wet fingers on your bunched up skirt.

He reached between your thighs and you felt his length rub against your ass. He teased you and dragged his fingers along your ass. He pressed his tip to your skin and guided it down. He squeezed your neck and you whimpered. He pushed against your entrance and paused.

“You’re not…” He began and thrust inside of you all at once. “Well, it doesn’t really matter.”

Your walls ached as he filled you. The pain was nothing compared to relief that washed over you. You hadn’t realized how much you longed for that feeling. His hand slid from your neck and he gripped your shoulder. His other went to your hip and he rocked his hips.

You grunted as he thrust. You wanted it to end but you also didn’t want him to stop. He was relentless and impatient. You expected little else from the steely man. You quaked as his pelvis slapped against your ass. The noise echoed off the corners of the room, interspersed with his low groans and you pathetic mewls.

He moved your body against his as he plunged deeper and deeper. He sped up, driven by your helpless moans as you clawed at the upholstered chair. You wanted to get away as much as you just wanted to grab onto something steady. You turned your head back and forth as your nerves flared. You shook and gasped as you came again.

“St-st-stop,” You pleaded. “Stop. It’s too--”

He slammed into you so hard you shrieked. He didn’t let up as he crushed you against the back of the chair. He snaked his hand up in front of you and groped your tit as his other arm wrapped around your neck. His thick muscle choked you as he pounded into you and the chair creaked dangerously. You trembled as the ripples washed over you and you skin tingled with the heat of the man behind you.

His thrusts turned sharp and furious. His arm tightened around your neck as he pulled his other hand back. He pushed into as far as he could, holding himself there for just a second each time. His heavy breaths were like hungry growls in your ear.

He pulled out of you suddenly and you felt his knuckles against your ass as they moved frantically. A warmth spurted along your lower back and his hand slowed. 

He sighed and unhooked his arm from around your neck. He climbed off the chair and smacked your ass again. It stung so much you were certain there was already a bruise.

“Clean yourself up.” He demanded as he sat on the bed heavily. “Then take that damn dress off.”

[word-scribbless]

Family part 1

This is my first Gibbs fic I’m posting! I intend to do more parts but I’m not there yet!

This is a gibbs x female reader it also includes an OC, Cori

Masterlist

Part 2

(Italics mean the character is signing. In most cases, they are speaking as well, except for Cori.)

———————

Gibbs and y/n had been seeing each other for the past 5 years. She was a linguistic specialist at the FBI who had consulted on several cases with NCIS. Gibbs would never tell Fornell, but he was beyond greatfull everyday that he brought y/N into his life.

Their relationship started off slow. Gibbs was a functional mute as usual, but Y/N had a way of reading him like no one else could. She understood that he would never stop loving Shannon, but helped him see that he didn’t have to stop loving his first wife in order to fall in love with her. Y/N understood all too well what losing someone felt like. Her fiancé had been killed during a deployment as a marine while she was deployed her self as an interpreter in the navy years ago. She had never felt the need to fall in love again until she met Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

After 3 years of dating they decided to officially move in together. Most of Y/N’s belongings had lived there anyway. So for the past 2 years they had been living together and were happier than either had been in a long time. The month before they had ended a long weekend trip together by getting married, just the 2 of them and a witness from the courthouse. They hadn’t told anyone yet, but it really wasn’t anyone’s business but theirs as far as they were concerned.

Y/N was sitting at her desk at the FBI working on finishing some paperwork when her phone rang.

“Y/L/N” she answered out of instinct without looking at the caller id

“Liar” she heard Gibbs say with a laugh, referring to her name being Y/N Y/L/N Gibbs now. She chuckled. “you busy?”

“Hey you! Sorry, instinct” she smiled “No I’m just finishing some paperwork, you need me?” She asked

“Yeah” Gibbs sighed. “I have a girl here, about 10, she won’t talk or let any males near her, but everytime she says no, she signs it.” He explained. “Our victim was her foster mom... so we need to talk to her but I’m the only one here that signs and she won’t let me near her. Ziva is sitting with her now but she’s not talking. I don’t wanna drag Abby out of the lab if I don’t have to.”

“I’ll be right there J. Let me just tell Fornell” Y/N said, already standing in front of her boss’s desk. “I knew I shouldn’t have introduced you to my best agent Gibbs” he yelled with a smile. “Get outta here”.

“Thanks boss, call if you need me.” She said as she left.

When Y/Ngot there she saw ziva sitting on the curb next to a little girl wrapped in a blanket with tears in her eyes. She walked over and approached slowly signing as she talked, even to ziva.

“Hey ziva.” She greeted before turning towards the young girl. “and hey there, I’m Y/N. Can I sit with you both?”

“Yes” the girl signed and mouthed back.

“Can you tell me your name sweetie?” Y/N asked

“Cori” she spelled “this is my name sign” she said making a signal for her name.

“This is ziva” Y/N sighed

“I know” cori responded “I can hear but not talk very loudly or too much. I was in an accident when I was younger. Can you tell her I said thank you for sitting with me?”

“Sure, would you be okay if I talked what you signed so we can all talk?” Y/n asked

Cori nodded. Y/n explained and ziva smiled “you’re welcome.” She said.

“I work for the FBI and ziva and her team work for NCIS, they’re like police but they help people who are in the navy like your foster mom.” Y/n explained.

“Do you guys have to ask me a ton of questions?” Cori asked.

“We’ll have to talk to you, but we want to make sure you feel safe too.” Ziva said.

“Ziva’s boss” y/n said before pointing over her shoulder at Gibbs talking to tony and McGee “Gibbs, the one with the silvery hair, he speaks sign language also. Would it be okay if he came and talked with us too?” She asked

Cori curled up a little bit signed “ he’s a good guy?”

” a very good guy” ziva said with a nod. Y/n added “yes! he used to be a marine and now he helps people as a NCIS agent.”

“You trust him?” Cori signed to Y/N.

“I married him” y/n laughed causing ziva to look at her with a raised eyebrow. “So yes, I trust him very much.”

This made Cori laugh and nod “okay I’ll talk to him.”

“Ziva can you go get Gibbs?” Yn asked

“Oh you mean you husband?” She questioned sassily

Y/n rolled her eyes “yeah him. I’ll tell you more about it later!”

Cori giggled “she didn’t know you were married?”

Y/n shook her head. “No. She knew we were together, but we got married by ourselves about a month ago” she said with a smile. “Gibbs is very nice, but not much of a sharer most of the time.” Cori nodded at this.

“Thank you Y/N” she whispers and signs causing Y/N to nod, happy that she trusts her enough to use her voice.

“Hi there Cori I’m Gibbs” Gibbs signed and said as he walked up to them and sat on the curb.

“Hi, I’m sorry I wouldn’t talk to you before.” Cori signed

“No need to apologize, I can look a little scary” he said, making both Cori and Y/N laugh slightly.

“Your wife says you’re really nice, I just haven’t known many nice men.” Cori admits with a sniffle.

Gibbs raises his eye brow to y/n at the word wife causing y/n to smirk shyly. His face softens at cori saying she didn’t know any nice men. He could only imagine the things this girl as gone through already.

Cori explains her story and what happened to her foster mom. She opens up to Gibbs quickly and is even okay when y/n has to step away to answer a call from Fornell.

“What’s going to happen to me?” Cori asked Gibbs. He is surprised to hear whisper her words as she signs them.

“Well let’s take one step at a time. You’ll come back to NCIS with us for now because we have some more questions and want to make sure your safe.” He explains.

“Okay” Cori nods

“It looks like y/n is probably going to have to go back to her work, would you like to ride back with ziva?” Gibbs asks

“Can you come with us please?” Cori signs, looking worried.

“Of course” he says.

Gibbs gets ziva set up in the car with Cori and goes to check in with Y/N before he drives them back to NCIS.

“Hey, you gotta get back?” Gibbs asks

“Yeah, Fornell has a case he needs an interpreter for and says it’s gotta be me. Will she be okay?”

“Yeah, she trusts me now. I’m gonna get her set up with Abby when we get back hopefully.” Gibbs explains.

“Alright, I’ll try to get back over as soon as I can. This has to be so scary for her.” Y/n said remembering what it felt like to lose her parents at a young age.

“She’ll be okay. She’s strong, I can tell because she reminds me of you.” He says rubbing her arm gently.

They usually didn’t do PDA but he could tell where her mind was.

Y/n smiled. “That explains why she trusts you then.” She says, making him smile.

“Alright I need to get back, but I should warn you that the whole team is gonna know we’re married by the time you get to head quarters. I’m sorry I just was trying to get Cori to trust you.” Y/n explained.

“That’s alright, I’m glad they’ll know. I hate not wearing my ring at work.” He said smirking “see you soon. Be safe.” He leaned in And kissed her cheek.

Y/N had been back at work for a few hours working on Fornell’s case when she stopped to call Gibbs.

“Yeah, Gibbs” he answered

“Hey me too” she joked back

“Hello Mrs. Gibbs” he said with a smile in his voice. “I was just about to call you after I talked to Abby”

“Mmm I love hearing you call me that. Need to call me back?”

“Nah I’m good, I need to talk to you about something important.” He said turning down a hall where he could be alone.

“Okay shoot”

“ Cori needs a place to stay while we work on her case. I talked to the social worker and she said that if we had the right clearances one of us could....”

“Yes. I’ll bring by the paperwork that proves I’m an emergency foster parent. Call the social worker and get yours started, don’t forget to tell her I have mine. It’ll make it easier.” Y/N quickly blurted. She had gotten emergency qualified when one of her nieces friend’s single parent had been admitted to the hospital.

“God, I love you!” He responded right away. In awe of how selfless his wife was.

“Ditto marine” she responded

“You’re positive this is okay?” He checked

“Yes! Ask cori her favorite color. I’ll take her shopping later, but she at least needs fresh sheets that are all her own. I’ll pick them up on the way home, and I’ll get the stuff to make my lasagna while I’m at it.”

“ I’m a lucky man” he answered

“Don’t you forget that” she laughed “I’m lucky too Jethro. I’ll see you at home okay?”

“Yup love you”

“Love you” she said hanging up the phone smiling at how amazing the man she loved was.

[annamusewrites]

Family isnt all about blood.

She finally was happy and felt safe, she shouldve known you cant stop running from your past and not have it catch up on you, but she doesnt want to lose her brother or her loved even if it meant she suffered.....she really shouldve expected this after all, she was a Taylor and no one walks away from that family.

It didnt really bother her that her brother never settled down with a partner, he had his reasons and trust issues that Ana knew, as long as he was safe, that's all that would matter for now. Granted, she would love for him to find someone but she wasnt going to force that on him either. They were both there for one another and he had accepted Ransom as well. Truthfully, she couldnt be happier and maybe that was the problem. Her happiness had blinded her to what was to come.

"Dads in town" those words made her drop her fork and look wide eyed at her brother but then she picked up her fork "guess he found out about my new job" her tone was flat, their Dad could go to Hell for all she cared right now. He abandoned them so he didnt exist and she wasnt going to let him play the Daddy role just because he found out his so called daughter now had money.

She felt Marty's eyes on her but she carried on with her meal "if he calls you, dont answer" she looked at him "I'm not that stupid" "i wasnt saying you were, I'm just....protective" his words made her smile, she had two protective men in her life, her brother and the love of her life and she loved them both for it "I know" she reached out for his arm "but that man isnt going to walk into our lives again after everything. He had his chances"

No more was said about that man for a couple of days, she got several missed calls from an unknown number and after checking it wasn't anything to do with her work, Ransom or his family, she blocked and ignored any more. She shouldve known ignoring him wouldnt make him go away.

"I'll be over later, just need a shower....an actual shower " she smirked into the phone "give me half an hour and I'll be there. I love you" she hing up the phone to Ransom as she walked into her house. A shower and a change of clothes was a must, she wanted to get rid of work more than anything right now.

Closing the door, she gasped as a hand went across her mouth and dragged her back, her heels falling off her feet as she tried to stay upright. She felt the coldness of the gun resting on her temple, god she wished she hadnt known that feeling and she tried not to panic but then she saw her brother on his knees, all bloodied up from what looked like beatings.

Was this to do with sleeping with the wrong gal? It couldnt of been, Ransom had made sure he knew to only go after single women and Marty wasnt that stupid anymore. She swallowed against the hand as she tried to take in the dark setting, any detail to use against the people not allowed here. Her eyes begging for any sign that he was alright.

"You always were an ignorant brat" that voice made her blood run cold, how did he find her? As if to confirm who he was a tall man now came into view, taking her in and she knew it was the bastard father that abandoned them for money. The hand slid from her mouth and she spat at her father making him slap her hard and grab her throat. She heard Marty try and struggle to help her but then her father laughed "I see you've finally got your mothers fiesty side in you. Shame it didnt help her or you now"

Before she knew it she was tossed onto the floor, her head hitting the corner of the coffee table making her groan out. "Rich little Princess doesnt share with her family" Ana looked up at him "you're not my family, you walked out on us"

Her father grabbed her by the hair, pulling it with no remorse as he made her kneel infront of her brother "no I kicked your good for nothing brother out, you just followed like a weak little puppy" she chewed her inner cheek refusing to whimper at the pain he was causing her by pulling her hair. She looked at her brother, tears stinging her eye with the pain "you're not even half the man Marty is" again that earned her a toss to the ground and a kick to her back.

Biting back the groan, she exhaled harshly as she heard her brother beg for him to stop hurting her and turn back to him "no" she went to push up on her arms only for them to wobble but she didnt care "let him be the monster he always was"

This time when she was dragged by up to her feet she could feel the metallic taste of blood in her mouth, but as she was pinned back to the wall, she felt the suffocating pressure of a hand tightly over her mouth and nose as she grabbed his arm and dug her nails in his arm as he watched her try not to fight for breath.

"Be a good girl and I'll let you breath" there was only one perfect to ever call her that and it certainly wasnt him. It made her feel sick hearing it from those lips. She felt his other hand grip her throat as tears streamed down her cheeks, her lungs begging for breath but she wasnt gling to fight for it either. Half an hour, she just had to last half an hour and then Ransom would call her and wouldnt get any answer and knew something was wrong but then he would walk straight into this and she couldnt bare the thought of him getting hurt. What was she going to do?

Finally he was allowed to breathe as she fell to her knees gasping her breath. Maybe he saw her not struggling as compliance, right now she could care less. Blinking she tried to focus clearly then she heard her brother scream. Looking up she noticed the knife wound "no" "no" she was grabbed again and pinned to someones body as she growled out but she couldnt move.

"I'm going to fucking kill you" her brother growled out and Ana didnt have any complaints there. She hears her cell ring, fuck, it couldnt of been half an hour already. Her father got her phone and showed her the caller ID, Linda was calling her and as her father tossed her phone out into the hallway, she felt a dreaded feeling that having not been able to reach Ana, Linda would phone Ransom. She was in two minds if that was a good idea or not.

"Havent changed at all, still the low life whore than ever, Martin" her father sounded displeased but when was he happy "your sister achieves alot more than you but still needs teaching on how to act properly. What? You both thought I'd let you walk away, embarrass me and I'd never punish you both for it? Thanks to Ana taking on that job and a very helpful assistant I found exactly where you loved"

Her mind whizzed trying to think who wouldve given out her address, she was going to fire that person....if they ever got out "What do you want?" Her words seemed to echo around the room making all eyes appear on her "what inwant is respect and I'm going to get it from you both one way or another. You're both coming back home, whether it's in a body bag or three back of the car is up to you"

"Go to hell" both her brother and her seemed to say at the same time, she kicked back making the man holding her back off and groan "fucking bitch" he grabbed her by the hair "going to teach you a fucking lesson" he dragged her by her hair up the stairs, each step hitting her body like a punch as she tried to struggle and groaned out. Hearing her brother try and get free and call for her made her suddenly want to panic but she wasnt going to show the bastard dragging her she was now scared.

She heard commotion downstairs and her cell phone ringing, now she did want Ransom to come in and somehow not get hurt. Being rescued wasnt such a bad idea. She whimpered as she was thrown onto her bed, trying to get her mind focused on anything but the pain. As her legs were dragged she reached out ontop of the bedside table remembering she had opened a letter with her mothers old fashioned letter opener and managed to grab it. "Going to make you behave bitch" she rose her hand and plunged the letter opener into the side of her neck "go fuck yourself" blood splattered from his neck as she turned her head away and managed to crawl under and away from him as she panted sat on the floor out of his reach as she watched the man who worked for her father bleed to death. She didnt dare think what he was going to do to her as she desperately tried to control her breathing.

Her phone rang again and maybe she shouldve tried to make a run for it. Maybe by some miracle whoever was ringing, more likely ransom, would hear the struggle as she was captured again but she also knew that would cost her brothers life and she couldnt lose him. Swallowing, she blinked , she had killed a man, but it was in self defence but that thought tried to over take her.

Her hands was shaking, as far as she knew there was this dead guy and her father left. Crawling slowly to the body she yanked the letter opener off his neck, trying not to get too much blood on her. She gripped the letter opener tightly and looked under her bed. Didnt Ransom leave a cell under here and said he would collect it later? God she hoped he hadnt collected it already. She smiled as she felt the cell in her hand as she looked through the contact until she reached Ransoms main cell number, but as she dialed his number, she screamed as she was yanked back. She hadnt seen the other man in the room downstairs, another person with her father. She threw the vocal under the bed enough not to be seen as she kept screaming in hopes if Ransom picked up he could tell she was in danger.but not enough that the man grabbed her would know she had another cell.

Against the stairs left their marks and neither touch of the other man was gentle. She was covered in blood and likely to have bruises now too "the fucking bitch killed Roma" he threw her onto the other chair and tied her up.and gagged her. She struggled under the harsh slap of her father stung her face so much she felt like he had taken her skin off, even if it was impossible. She had to save her brother as he was bleeding, god knows to death but now tied down she was trying to think how. "Guess we're going to play this the hard way then. Bring it in" Ana swallowed, it could be anything knowing him and she couldnt quite see what it was as inwas dragged behind her.

"Marty all will.be forgiven, are you going to come.back.home?" Marty knew what that really meant for them both "fuck you" he moaned through his pain and before Ana could realise what was happening her chair was thrown back into.something ice cold. She realised it was a large tub of ice cold.water behind her as she struggled to not breathe in. There was noise.coming from above the surface but she couldnt make it out as her lungs fought for air then she was sat back up coughing for breath.

"Ana come home" Ana looked through her wet eyes "I'd rather die" again she was fallen back into the ice water. A father who tortured his children was no father at all but what was new for her? She gasped for air as she was pulled back up hearing her brother begging for her tonbe let go and he'll go back if she wasnt hurt anymore. They had broken her brother and she couldnt blame him really "no...no. I wont let you go back there" her throat was grabbed, she needed more air and then she heard someokenwalk up her steps "go check it out"

The other man left as her father looked back at her "if youd rather die then so be it" he whispered against her ear "you're not worth the rescue" with that he pushed her chair back into the water and let go, raising the gun he pressed it against her brother forehead.....

@flamingshieldwrites

[captainbetonit]

Room for more chapter 8

~.~

The next few days went well, and as those days bled into a month. Nearly to the date Pixel came back for a check in for the kids. She trusted her friends but needed to put that aside for the well-being and safety, so here she was checking on them.

It was raining that fateful day, near pouring from the dark grey clouds. Thanksgiving will be in a few weeks, the rapid drop in temperature was an odd sensation that she wasn’t prepared for. She didn’t need to knock before Cole opened the door with a smile.

“Hey, come on in.” He greeted her, opening the door.

“Thank you, now you know why i’m here?” Pixel got straight to the point, she wasn’t here as a friend.

Cole nodded, “Of course, now Zane wasn’t sure if you wanted to talk to the kids first or us so both are in the living room.”

She nodded before she brought up their file, it was rather thick and contained the information for both brother and sister. “I’ll talk with the children first, I'm trusting that they're ok.”

“In our words yes, but you have to take their word for it.” Cole simply shrugged, in the end it was up to the kids.

Pixel nodded again, before moving to the living room where the two children sat playing with toys. They did seem happier then when she’d last seen them, more like children.

Zane came out of the kitchen, apron tied around his waist and a tray of drinks in hand. “Hello Mrs. Borg, welcome.”

The children looked up from their toys and smiled at her, Kai seemed hesitant with his greeting but did so nonetheless. “Hello Mrs. Borg!” The two greeted before giving Zane their whole attention.

An exchange of pleasantries and drinks commenced, mostly small talk and such before Pixel cleared her throat, “I would like to speak to the children now please, alone.” That statement made the room feel so much colder.

“Of course, kids go with Mrs.Borg. Show her your rooms and such.” Zane motioned for the two to follow Mrs. Borg when they made no move.

Kai eyed her with caution, he knew she was a nice woman and from he was told she was fair and sweet. But social workers weren’t always nice, they seemed nice but weren’t what they seemed. Nya mostly followed her brother in mannerisms, but never really thought. Like when all the doctors thought her Mama was gonna be fine and she died a week later-or when dad said he’d be back. Nonetheless the two followed Mrs. Borg up the stairs and to Nya’s room where the children share the bed while Mrs. Borg sits in front of them.

~*meanwhile*~

Anxiety was a son of bitch, so much so that Cole was cursing every single god to let him be at peace. Granted that probably wouldn’t happen seeing as they didn’t have much to worry about-they shouldn’t have anything to worry about.

“You're pacing a hole in the carpet dear.” Zane mentioned as he sat with a book on the couch and some tea.

“Surprised you aren’t joining me.” Cole snapped before stopping and wincing, “I’m sorry babe, it’s just been really stressful lately.”

Zane sighed as he closed his book before rubbing his eyes, “I know my dear, but please calm down.”

Cole, now tired, collapses on the couch next to his husband. “I hate waiting.”

Zane guided Cole’s head to his lap and started to card his fingers through thick black hair. “As do I, my love, but if we waited this long then perhaps it’s worth the wait.”

The two were silent for a moment, the house rarely creaked but as the silence went on it felt like the house was moving with the wind of the storm.

“Are we good parents?” Cole asks as Zane picks up his discarded tea.

He was silent for a moment, contemplating his husband's words. “I like to think we’re doing a good job so far, but only time will tell really.”

“I’m not talking about that,” Cole sits up and faces his husband, “I’m talking about are we doing the right thing? Like could we be holding them back, are we taking them away from an uncontacted family member, are we doing things wrong and not knowing it?!” His voice rose an octave, panic of unknown answers to rising questions loomed over him like the storm clouds outside.

Zane wasn’t going to lie; questions like those often plagued his mind. It was times like those when he wouldn’t sleep-couldn’t stop the thoughts that reminded him that what they were doing could have been taken away so quickly.

“I like to think we're doing the right thing-we’re hopefully doing the right thing. Maybe we're helping them, or maybe we’re like our parents and don’t even know it. I…” Zane trailed off, the thought of being like either of his fathers was a difficult one to handle. Dr. Julian was a good man, just not a great parent; never really being there for his kids and favoring one over the other. His other father, Arashi was far more old fashioned with just about everything especially parenting. While he was there for things, It always felt like nothing was good enough for him, and in turn neither Zane nor Echo were good enough.

“We’re definitely better than our parents-no offence. I mean we’re going through all these hoops just to be here.” Cole thankfully interrupts Zane’s thoughts. “Plus we’ve done a lot to get here and made progress with Kai.”

Ok that was undeniable-when Kai first got there it was tense and full of trial and error, Nya while younger and mostly followed her brother in terms of what he did. Both have grown so much in the past month, opening up to them and feeling like a family.

“What i’m trying to say is, we can try and hopefully succeed?” Cole gently brought the conversation to a sorta close.

“I suppose your right, but that will never truly answer our questions.” Zane reached for his husband, seeking comfort. “And that’s good right?”

The two were quiet for a moment, before little feet were heard coming down the stairs followed by the sound of Pixels heels.

The two children joined the older on the couch and leaned deeply into their warmth. Whatever they talked about upstairs was clearly behind them.

“Alright so after i take a look around then you can go back to domestic life.” Pixel smiles as Zane detached himself from Nya’s hold on him and led her around the home for her to deem safe for the children.

~later~

They passed the check with flying colors, the kids were happy and very safe. Education wise Zane had gotten them workbooks and brought them to speed with 5th and 1st grade respectfully so they could both go to school in the spring. If they were still in their care by then anyways.

Nonetheless things were actually going well for the family, it was perfect.

Then they got a call, rather late at night actually from Pixel who sounded frazzled and stressed.

Zane picked up his phone around 3 am, answering the call without looking at the caller ID. “Hello?”

“Hey Zane-quick thing.” Pixel wasted no time with introductions or greetings. “Seeing as you and Cole are foster parents and while I know you already have two children under your care-” Pixel cut herself off with a quick ‘excuse me’ to supposedly yell at someone.

Cole turned to his side as Zane sat up and clicked on the bedside lamp, “What's happening? Who is it?”

Before Zane could answer Pixel talked to him “Can you take a baby-maybe 9 months old?”

Zane was silent for a moment, needing some time to process her words. “Um, can i talk to Cole for a second then I can talk.” He hung up the phone before letting the phone fall and falling backwards into the pillows himself.

“What happened?” Cole himself turned on his bedside lamp before following his husband and collapsing onto his pillows.

“Pixel wants to place us with a baby.” Was all Zane said. That kind of shocked Cole, when they had first considered fostering they had been open to much younger kids. Now though seeing as they already have two kids-did they really need a baby?

“Do you want to?” Zane asks, before pausing, “Foster the baby I mean.”

“Honestly, we should do it.” Cole answers after a pause. “I mean we're doing pretty good with Kai and Nya and the system doesn’t help kids at any age really.”

He turns to his side, waiting for Zane’s response. He knew Zane wanted a baby, hell when they were in highschool Zane took many babysitting jobs be it with his younger brother or the neighborhood kids.

“I think we should as well.” Zane finally answers after the minutes start to stretch. “But what about Kai and Nya? They should be consulted on this, it’s a very important decision that they should have a hand in.”

“Call Pixel back, and we can talk to them in the morning.” Cole advised as he got up with his phone. “I’ll call in sick so we can all talk this over.”

Before Zane could tell him about the rain from the afternoon Pixel picked up, “Zane, hi. Did you both talk about it?”

“Yes, we’d love to foster the baby but why did you call at 3 in the morning?” Zane also got up from bed-he’d might as well check in on the kids.

Pixel was silent on the other line for a little while before she sighed heavily, “Well seeing as i was handed the baby at 2 am i figured it was better than nothing. And you did answer so.”

Zane was quiet for a second, “I’m sorry what?”

Pixel sighed again before answering, “Watch the news in the morning and you’ll understand ok? So when can i come with the baby?”

“Umm, in two days maybe? We have to talk to the kids and get everything ready.” Zane leaded against the hallway wall. “..What’s their name? The babies?”

“His name is Lloyd, he's nine months old and i think you’ll love him.” He could hear the smile in Pixels voice before his phone pinged. “I sent you some general information, I'll talk to you later ok?” They exchanged goodbyes and hung up.

After checking Kai’s room(it was empty) and then going to Nya’s to see the siblings cuddled close in the bed. After a quick picture of the two he closed the door and went back to bed. Cole was back, the bedside lamp turned off. Zane turned off his light and went to sleep.

Tomorrow is going to be hectic.

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Saving Grace - Part 3

Summary: Steve leaves you and your son to go back to Peggy unaware your pregnant.

Your heartbroken and struggling without Steve until Bucky Barnes steps up to help you out. With you and Bucky growing closer everyday will he be your saving Grace?

(Takes place after The Avengers defeat Thanos and people lost in the snap are back).

A/N -Sorry summary sucks! If i say too much it will give things away! 💜

(3 months later)

I was sat on one of the sun loungers in the back yard with Wanda as we watched Bucky and Sam running around after Harrison while Clint was working away at the BBQ.

"You seem happier sweetheart" Wanda said rolling her head to the side to look at me.

"I feel a lot better, its still tough but I'm getting there" i told her truthfully smiling as i watched Bucky scoop up Harrison making him laugh loudly.

"Having Bucky around looks like its helped a lot"

"His been great...."

"But?"

"Its just...." i could feel the heat rise to my cheeks and shifted in my seat.

"Just spit it out!"

"My hormones are going crazy!"

"Okay....." she looked confused and shook her head waiting for me to explain.

"Im horny all the time!!" I whispered to her "and he walks around looking like that..." i nodded my head over to where Bucky was now rolling around the grass with Harrison climbing on him, both of them laughing.

"Get him lil man!" Sam was encouraging Harrison as he stood laughing at the two of them.

"Like what? Its not like his naked Y/N" Wanda chuckled clearly thinking I'm loosing mind.

"Okay, you don't think this is real..... take a look"

"You mean you want me to use my powers on you?"

"Its the only way you'll get what i mean"

I could see the red wisps appear around Wanda's fingers and creep over to me, her eyes glowing red and then she gasped sitting back in her seat a little breathless.

"Wow! Thats..... intense"

"I told you!!"

"Hey doll.... you okay?" Bucky asked marching towards us, i let out a whimper at the way he strutted towards me.... i was about ready to throw myself at him i swear to god.

"Hmmm im fine, why?"

"I saw Wanda using her magic on you...."

"Oh that was nothing, just girl stuff" i shrugged holding my hand up "help me up would you i need to pee"

"Of course" he smiled taking my hand and easily pulling me up to my feet.

"Thanks, if im like this now what am i gonna be like by the end!" I moaned as i walked into the house.

On my way back outside i saw Sam in the kitchen grabbing more beers, he gave me a smile as soon as he saw me.

"Hey mama, you want anything?"

"Id love a beer" i said pouting at the fact i couldn't drink.

"How about a soda?"

"Fine! Always gotta ruin my fun Sammy"

As i walked over to grab my soda from Sam and help him with the beers he pulled me in for a hug.

"You doing okay?" He asked quietly placing a kiss to the top of my head.

"Im doing better, theres still alot anger there but im trying my best to push it aside" i admitted to the man who had been like a brother to me since the day i met him, it was always so easy to talk to Sam "i've gotta put Harrison and the baby first. My anger towards 'he who wont be named' isn't going to help anyone, so whats the point?"

"Your a better person than me Y/N"

"Its not gonna do me any good, it wont make him come back to us, he had his life with Peggy just like he always wanted. Even if that meant leaving us behind"

"If he wasn't so old i'd punch him in the face for you i promise"

"Haha get in line darlin, Wanda would be out for blood and Bucky.... well i think he would channel his inner Winter Soldier" i chuckled as i stepped out of Sams arms to grab the drinks.

"You and Bucky seem to be getting close"

"Sam..... don't start" i shook my head knowing where this was going "we're just friends, his helping me with Harrison...."

"It'd be okay if there WAS something there though I'm just saying" he held up his hands "i hate to admit this but Bucky is a good guy"

"I know he is, believe me i know"

"So whats the problem?"

"Erm how about the fact I'm pregnant by his best friend?" I said with wide eyes, it should have been the obvious reason!

"Well actually IM his best friend now since old man Rogers turned up"

"Erghhh you know what i mean! Stop making this weird!" I grabbed the drinks and headed outside away from the conversation.

"Hey, everything okay? I was gonna come looking for you you were gone that long" Wanda asked looking concerned.

"Yeah fine, just chatting with Sam"

"About anything exciting?"

"Nope" i replied popping the P as i shook my head and took my seat again.

"Mama!" Harrison said running over wanting to climb into my lap.

"Hey baby" i picked him up and his little arms held me round my shoulders as he buried his head in my neck "awww is someone sleepy" i smiled running my hand over his blonde hair "did Uncle Bucky wear you out bud?"

I felt Harrison nod his head and heard Wanda chuckle....2 minutes later he was fast asleep.

"Sweetboy just wanted his mama" Wanda said smiling as she looked at Harrison "i still can't believe you have a son and that i missed so much"

"I know me too Wan, at least you'll get to witness everything with this one" i said looking down at my almost 6 month bump.

"Oh Y/N i cant wait! Im so excited"

"Hey Wan, how would you feel about being in the delivery room with me when i have her?..... you don't have to only i really don't wanna do it alone"

"Are you being serious??? You would want me there??"

"Of course! Your my best friend"

"I would be honoured!"

"Thanks, your the best".

"Ladies foods ready" Clint called over and Wanda shot up and rushed over to grab something, i stayed where i was not wanting to disturb Harrison.

"Here, grabbed you a cheeseburger" Bucky suddenly appeared holding out the burger, it smelt like heaven and made me smile instantly.

"Bucky Barnes you are the best!" I beamed making grabby hands towards the plate he held.

"Here i'll swap you.... let me take Harrison while you eat"

"Thanks" i smiled up at him accepting the plate, then I watched as Bucky carefully took Harrison. He rubbed his back soothingly when he stirred a little bit but Harrison cuddled up to Bucky, his face buried against Buckys neck.

"Do you want me to go put him in bed?"

"If you don't mind that would be great, could you grab the monitor from his dresser please on your way out?"

"Sure thing doll, be right back" he smiled at me before heading inside.

"Bucky is so good with Harrison" i heard Wanda say, i turned round to see she was back in her seat with a plate full of food a huge smile on her face.

"He is, I'm glad Harrison has him around. Ever since Ste... HE left, i worry about the effect it will have on Harrison" i admitted "his okay right?.... i mean his young...."

"His fine i promise you, he has the best mommy in the world. Not to mention a kick ass aunt and uncles who love him so much"

"Id be lost without you guys".

"We'll we're not going anywhere so you have nothing to worry about".

The following couple of days felt a bit off between Bucky and me after our friends had been constantly commenting on how close we had been getting, i started to panic and distance myself.

I wasn't blind, obviously i could see how attractive Bucky was but with my hormones all over the place.... it wasn't a good idea to even think about it. Plus he was Steve's BEST FRIEND!!

"Hey" i heard Bucky call out as he opened the front door.

"Hey Buck" i called back from the kitchen where i was making dinner. Bucky came into kitchen dropping his bag in the corner before walking over to Harrison to say hello.

"everything okay at the compound?"

"Same old, Secretary Ross is still against Sam taking on the shield" he said as he come to grab a bottle of water from the fridge "their pressing for this new guy Walker to take on the Captain America mantle"

"Of course they are, they want someone they can control" i rolled my eyes. Ross had always hated that Steve did his own thing, he wouldn't let them decide who he could or couldn't help and Sam was just the same.

"The guy seems like a punk not gonna lie"

"Sounds about right, probably their golden boy"

"We're fighting it the best we can but its tough" Bucky shrugged, i turned to look at him and noticed he looked exhausted.

"Why don't you go have a shower while i finish dinner, you look tired"

"Sounds good doll, your the best" he smiled and placed a kiss to my temple as he passed like it was the most natural thing in the world for him to do.

At dinner Harrison insisted on sitting next to his Uncle Bucky like always! Something that always made Bucky smile proudly. I loved that he had Bucky around but i couldn't help but think of how Steve was gone.... how could he leave his son so easily!

"Y/N you okay?" Bucky asked getting my attention, i nodded quickly and forced a smile.

"Yeah I'm fine"

"You sure? You've been kinda distant the past couple of days" he said as he wiped Harrison's face over and helped him down from the table.

"Just thinking about some things" i shrugged watching as Harrison run back through to the living room to play with his toys.

"Your nervous..... i can hear your heart racing you know"

"Buck thats not fair...."

"Whats going on? Talk to me"

"Its nothing to worry about"

"Is this about what Sam said the other day at the BBQ?"

"About what?" I asked playing dumb.

"I heard him ask about how close we'd become...."

"His not the only one who's mentioned it, Wanda said something too" i admitted shifting nervously in my seat.

"I see" he nodded sadly "you don't want them thinking theres anything going on with us"

"No! I don't care what they think. Its just.... this is so messed up Bucky"

"If I've over stepped in anyway I'm sorry.... i never meant to make you uncomfortable"

"You haven't i promise, honestly I've been so glad to have you here. I don't know what i would have done without you.... it feels so.... it feels right with you here. It scares me how much i need you around"

"Well I'm not going anywhere" he shrugged "i'll always be here for you and Harrison. Its been so long since i felt like i have a home....and... being here with you and Harrison? Im so happy and i can't remember ever feeling like this"

Bucky suddenly reached over placing his metal hand over mine "I don't know how Steve could ever leave you both. If you were mine id never let you out of my sight"

"Thats because your a good man Bucky Barnes" i smiled turning my hand so i could hold his hand better "after Steve left i was broken hearted you saw me" i scoffed "i didn't think it was possible to get past it let alone feel anything for anyone else..... then you came along"

"Is that a good thing?"

"Yeah" i chuckled "its just the timing.... i mean look at me, Im 6 months pregnant, my emotions are all over the place. I just think if we're even considering being anything more than friends that we need to wait. At least until after the baby....."

"I can wait" he nodded quickly "like i said I'm not going anywhere"

"Okay" i nodded giving him a smile "lets just keep this conversation between us for now, i don't want the others getting involved in this. They mean well but...."

"Their not exactly subtle about it are they?"

"I don't think they know the meaning of the word".

Tag list: @jennmurawski13 @kenzieam @captainchrisstan @s-t-r-i-k-e-us @lets--be-honest

@ms-betsy-fangirl wont let me tag :(

[bleedinghearthalstead]

SWAT!Jay / Upstead AU

A/N: Part 7! Crossposted on AO3. Can’t believe I’ve already written 15,000+ words for this AU. Thanks again for all your comments, they keep me motivated.

"Surprise!" Mouse's grin slightly falters when Jay continues gaping at him.

Once his still somewhat sleep-muddled brain catches up, the biggest grin forms on his face and Jay pulls his best friend in for a hug. He pulls back to punch Mouse in the arm. "What the hell, man? I thought you weren't supposed to be stateside until next week!"

Jay startles awake at his phone buzzing on his nightstand. The room is pitch dark except for the blinking screen of his cell, somebody calling him. He checks the alarm clock next to him and lowly grumbles, seeing that it is 1.44 a.m. Grabbing the offending and still vibrating object, he squints at the screen. When he sees the caller ID, his heart skips a beat.

He throws the blanket off of him and gets up off the bed, quickly pressing the green icon. "Hey man, just give me a sec," he whispers and tiptoes out of his bedroom, careful not to disturb Hailey who is still asleep. She stirs only for a second, then turns around to her other side and is fast asleep again. Quietly closing the bedroom door behind him, Jay goes back to the call. "Buddy, everything alright?" He doesn't usually get calls from the other person at this time of night unless it's urgent.

"Jay, I need you to do me a favor-" And Jay immediately starts going through a list in his head which DOD or Army Intelligence contacts he is still friendly with. "-and open your door."

His mental rundown comes to a grinding halt. "What?"

"Open your door?" He can hear the other man chuckling on the other end.

Jay quickly walks to his apartment door and pulls it open, revealing Mouse in his army fatigues and tan beret, green duffle bag slung over his shoulder. Jay can only stare.

"Surprise!" Mouse's grin slightly falters when Jay continues gaping at him.

Once his still somewhat sleep-muddled brain catches up, the biggest grin forms on his face and Jay pulls his best friend in for a hug. He pulls back to punch Mouse in the arm. "What the hell, man? I thought you weren't supposed to be stateside until next week!"

"We achieved our mission objective early and then I kept bugging Captain Morello about moving up my leave until he got fed up with me and put me on the next cargo transport to Germany. And then it was another 20 plus hours to get from Germany to JFK and from JFK to O'Hare."

Jay takes a good look at his friend – Mouse looks a little tired but happy. Happier than he was a year ago, before he decided to re-enlist. Jay had gotten him a job as a CPD tech, but after a couple of years it was clear that Mouse wanted (and needed) to move on to something else. Although Jay still doesn’t like the fact that Mouse went back to the Army considering what it did to both of them, he is glad to see that his friend has been doing well for himself.

"Welcome home, man." They grin at each other and Jay ushers Mouse inside the apartment. Jay closes the door and when he turns, he bumps into Mouse, who hasn't moved more than two steps into the place, and Jay gets a face full of stinky, dusty Army canvas. He scrunches up his nose in disgust. "Dude-" Before he can say another word, Jay spots Hailey standing by the bedroom door, not even six feet away from them. He must've not heard her get up. "Oh hey, babe. Sorry, did we wake you?"

Hailey only raises an eyebrow at her boyfriend. Jay's place is tiny and the walls are paper-thin, you can hear his next-door neighbor's TV through the wall. When she woke up to find Jay not in bed with her and heard voices coming from the other side of the bedroom door, she decided to investigate. Having heard their conversation, she deduces that the man in uniform standing in front of her is Jay's ranger friend who he had mentioned was supposed to come home next week and stay with Jay for a couple of days. Seems like he got into the city a little earlier than expected. She turns to Mouse with a warm smile and sticks out her hand. "Hi, I'm Hailey. You must be Greg."

Surprised to hear his given name – these days it's only coming from his mother or Jay if they're having a really serious talk –, Mouse drops his duffle to shake her hand enthusiastically. "Hi! Greg, yes, Greg. Everyone calls me Mouse though." Only when he sees that Hailey is just wearing an oversized shirt, her legs bare, and she looks like she just woke up – because she did, and looking at Jay, he looks like he just woke up too – does Mouse realize the time, his body clock still in another time zone. "Oh fuck, what time is it?"

"It's almost 2 a.m., buddy," Jay chuckles.

"Oh fuck, shit, I'm so sorry." He fumbles with the buttons on his watch. "I forgot to change the time on this thing."

"It's fine, man." Jay pats his friend on the back. "You want a beer?" When Hailey tilts her head at him in question, he shrugs at her. He won't be able to fall asleep now anyways, too hyped up by his friend's surprise appearance. When he sees Mouse fidgeting and glancing between Hailey and him, he says, "Why don't you go in the kitchen and get us a couple of pilsners?"

Mouse lets out the breath he was holding, glad for the distraction. "Sure, I'll be right back."

As soon as Mouse is out of sight, Jay moves closer to Hailey and leans in to give her a kiss. "Sorry we woke you up."

"That's alright. You weren't expecting him either, I take it?"

Jay sighs. "Like I said, I thought he was coming home next week. I didn't think he was gonna drop by like this." He scratches his head. "Listen, we're just gonna have a couple of beers, get Mouse settled in-"

"It's okay, I'll get the spare blanket and pillow from the closet."

Hailey is about to walk off, but he grabs her hand to stop her and smiles at her gratefully. "Thanks, babe."

"No problem."

When she disappears into the bedroom, Jay goes into the kitchen, finding Mouse already sitting at the small dining table, three open beer bottles in front of him. Mouse hands him one of the beers, taking the other one. They clink the bottles together. Jay sits down with a sigh, taking a large gulp of the beer.

"Hailey's not joining us?" Mouse nods at the third beer.

The other man shakes his head. "She's making up your bed for tonight."

Mouse grimaces. "Oh man, she doesn't have to, and again, I'm really sorry to barge in unannounced… especially if I had known that she was living here-"

Jay laughs. "She doesn't live here. If anything, I'd move into her place, it's much bigger and nicer."

His girlfriend comes up behind him at that moment and puts her hands on his shoulders, smirking. "The only reason we're here so much is because he lives closer to my district."

"So you're just using me?" Hailey slaps his arm as Jay laughs.

"I'll leave you two to it." She leans down to kiss Jay. "Don't stay up too late." She then smiles at Mouse. "Nice to meet you, Mouse. I'll see you tomorrow." With that, she exits the kitchen.

"Hey, you didn't answer my question," Jay calls after her, but only receives a giggle and a "goodnight, boys" in return before he hears the bedroom door close. He shakes his head, but has a dopey smile on his face.

"So that's Hailey, huh?" Mouse smirks at his best friend.

"Yep, that's Hailey." Jay takes another pull of the beer.

When Jay doesn't say anything else, Mouse rolls his eyes. His friend can be really reticent if he wants to. "When you talked about her, I didn't think you guys were that serious…"

Jay looks at him indignantly. "We've been dating for like six months!"

"Yeah, but whenever you mention her, you just say that you're hanging out and it's hard finding the time to be with her, what with work – she's police too, right? It just sounded more casual, is all." Mouse raises an eyebrow at him. "And even if you're saying she's not living here, I'm pretty sure that she spends more time here than you think." At Jay's frown, he points at the tea kettle. "You don't drink tea, buddy."

"So what? That's like one thing," Jay says, somehow irked.

"There were at least three pairs of shoes and a couple of jackets at the door that are definitely not yours." Mouse starts ticking things off on his fingers. "There was folded laundry from the both of you in the living room, you've got decorative pillows and a really nice throw blanket on the couch, there was a bottle of nail polish and a box of hair ties on the coffee table, it smells really nice in here and-" He points at the three little potted plants sitting on the window sill. "-the Halstead I know is a stone-cold plant killer."

Jay can only stare at his best friend, the beer bottle stopped mid-raise to his mouth. He's somewhat shocked at what Mouse could glean of their relationship in the few minutes he's been here. Surprised, not really. Mouse is one of the smartest people he knows – he always wonders how the CIA or NSA haven't poached him from the Army yet – and he wouldn't call him his best friend for nothing.

Mouse can read him like an open book. "Look, this isn't a bad thing, I'm happy for you." He shrugs. "I don't know why you felt like you had to hide it. Like, do other people even know you're dating?"

Frowning, Jay thinks about what his friend just said and it's kind of true. Hailey has met his team guys and they've gone out drinking before, and he's also met a couple of Hailey's friends, but except for the occasional night out, it's usually just the two of them. A lot of the time, they just hang out at his or Hailey's place. They did establish quite early on that they were exclusively dating, but how much of that have they shown to the outside world? Jay doesn't know. And it's been half a year. Half a year of them unintentionally playing down their relationship? They're both not that big on PDA, but he loves Hailey, he's pretty damn sure Hailey loves him too and they're very happy together. So why are they hiding?

Mouse thankfully changes the subject when he realizes he's hit a nerve and fills Jay in on the happenings in the battalion and how much the forward operating base in Afghanistan has changed from the time they were there in 2008 because of the troop drawdown. They spend another hour or so catching up until Jay starts yawning every couple of minutes. Mouse absolves him from having to stay up with him just so he has some company, citing that he'll be fine reading the magazine he bought at the airport, so Jay heads back to bed.

Lying down next to Hailey mindful not to wake her again, he cuddles up to her back, draping his arm over her waist. Sighing contently, he is ready to drift off to sleep.

"All good?" He hears her whisper sleepily. When she pulls his arm tighter around her, he smiles and kisses the back of her head.

"Yeah, all good." Jay falls asleep to the sound of Hailey's breathing.

* * * * *

Mouse insists on inviting them out for drinks the next night, still feeling guilty about his impromptu visit in the middle of the night. They agree on meeting in a pub not far from Jay's apartment, so a police detective, a SWAT sniper and an Army Ranger walk into a bar… The place is packed since it's a Friday night, people squeezing into the place to celebrate the end of their work week. Irish-inspired rock music and loud talking fills the air. They were just barely able to snag a tiny table with only one bar stool that Hailey gets to sit on, Jay standing next to her and Mouse on the other side of the table.

"The last time we were on leave together," Mouse almost has to shout over the loud din in the pub, "We were in a club and Jay got so wasted that he tripped and poured his beer all over a group of girls and almost started a fight-"

"I didn't start a fight!"

"You almost did and me and our buddies had to drag Jay outside and-"

"I would've been fine walking out on my own, thank you very much."

Mouse laughs. "You could barely get off the floor, man. I had to pay a taxi driver an extra 50 bucks before he agreed to take us home."

"I paid you back!"

"And in the taxi, he puk-"

"Let me stop you right there." Jay playfully glares at his friend. "You know I have just as much dirt on you, buddy."

Hailey is laughing at their banter, excited to hear stories of Jay's past. They have been together for a few months now, but a lot of Jay's military days are still somewhat of a mystery to her. He's let her in on a few select things, but usually only when he startled awake from a nightmare and woke up Hailey in the process, and even then he's very sparse with the details. So it's good to have someone like Mouse there to bring back positive memories from that time, even if they're somewhat disgusting.

A few times during the evening, Hailey thinks she might be imagining it, but Jay is a little more touchy-feely than usual. When they go out with other people, they of course stay close to each other, but Jay normally wouldn't be standing behind her, hugging her, or kiss her randomly. It's not like they're full-on making out in front of Mouse, although it does seem to have something to do with him. Maybe Jay just doesn't like showing his affection in front of other people or he's just more comfortable with his best friend. Hailey doesn't know what to think when Mouse smirks at them like he knows something they don't.

More than a few rounds later, they are surprised when last call is announced by the bartender and looking around they realize that they are some of the last patrons left. Mouse heads over to the bar to get a last round of drinks for them even when Hailey tells him no and Jay excuses himself to go to the restroom, leaving Hailey at their table. She pulls out her phone to check the time, sighing when she sees that it's already 2 a.m. Even though the evening has been fun, she'll be glad to head home. Mouse's late arrival combined with the man hunt for a murderer earlier today, she feels the need for sleep pulling at her.

"Hey beautiful," a voice comes from behind her, "You here all alone? Why don't you hang out with us?" She turns around and is confronted by two big bald guys dressed in all black, looking like a set of Humpty Dumpty twins on steroids.

Convinced that this is some kind of a joke, Hailey laughs. "No thanks, guys, I'm good."

"Come on now, we'll show you a good time. We know where to party all night long."

Before she has a chance to reply, Jay sidles up next to her, effectively putting himself between her and the two other men. "Sorry guys, she's with me."

They look Jay up and down and scoff. This is one instance where Hailey has to curse Jay's baby face. If you were looking at them as a bystander, it would look like her boyfriend didn't stand a chance. Jay isn't short, but the other men are at least a couple of inches taller than him and about twice his body size. And for whatever reason Jay decided today was a good day to wear a polo shirt and khakis, it makes him look like a preppy college kid facing off against two angry thugs.

"Listen, Lake Forest," Thug #1 says, looking down at Jay, "why don't you get out of my way so I can show her what it's like to be with a real man."

"I said she's with me," Jay growls and if his tone is more possessive than he intended, he's blaming it on the alcohol. "Now get out of here."

"Or what?" Thug #1 chuckles. "I'll lay you out right where you stand."

"Jay, no," Hailey tries to hold him back, but he's already moving towards Thug #1.

Jay gives him a condescending look. "I'd like to see you try."

And then it pops off. Thug #1 swings a fist at Jay's face, but Jay saw that move coming a mile away and ducks, hitting the other guy with two swift and surgical punches in the solar plexus. Watching his friend fall to the floor gasping, Thug #2 charges at Jay, but before he can take a step towards him, Mouse is already on his back, his arms going around his neck in a chokehold. The guy tries to shake the ranger off to no avail, his face turning beet red. He starts wildly tapping Mouse's arm, but Mouse only lets him go once he drops to his knees, heavily coughing.

Thug #1 decides to go for another round and roaring, he jumps up and pulls a knife out of his boot. The blade slices the air in front of Jay's face as Jay quickly pulls back. When he goes in for another stab, Jay slaps the guy's wrist with both hands, easily disarming him. Then yanking the other man towards him by the arm with one hand, his other hand at the back of the other man's neck, Jay pulls him down and knees him first in the stomach and then in the head, leaving the guy writhing on the floor. He kicks the knife away to a safe distance.

Alerted to the commotion, the thugs' four friends – all looking like they stepped straight out of a damn Eastern European gangster movie, either in track suits or leather jackets – rush over to help their downed comrades, poised and ready to get in the fight, one of them also drawing a knife.

Hailey has seen enough. She pulls out her badge and service weapon, holding them up in warning, then yells as loudly as she can, "Police! Don't move!" She points her gun directly at the man with the knife. "You, drop the knife!" He complies easily enough and the knife hits the floor with a clank. Hailey turns to the rest of the bar. "Everyone who doesn't want to get arrested tonight, get out of here, NOW!"

When Thug #1 tries to crawl away, Jay rolls his eyes and stops him with a boot on his back. "Not you, you moron." He turns to Hailey. "You got cuffs on you?"

Hailey shakes her head no, then grimaces. If they arrest the two, they have to call the police and go down to the district, do all the paperwork, give witness statements, which is going to take hours and Hailey is tired.

With the pub now empty except for them, Humpty and Dumpty and the bartender, Hailey turns to the latter. "You wanna press charges?"

The bartender shrugs. There's a couple of broken glasses on the floor and stools thrown over, but the damage is minimal. "Not if you don't."

"Alright then." Hailey orders the offenders to hand over their wallets, photographing their IDs with her phone, then takes out a couple of bills and leaves the money on the bar top. She sends off the pair with a warning to never show their faces in the bar again.

Walking home, Jay has his arm draped over Hailey's shoulder while she has her arm around his back. Mouse is walking next to them, jumping up and down excitedly. "That was fun!"

"Oh my God," Hailey groans and Jay smacks him upside the head.

Mouse just laughs. "We need to go clubbing tomorrow!"

[chidoroki]

TPN ch180

(spoilers! i'm so broken)

I didn't want to be right. I didn't want to actually believe that Emma was lying. If anything, I thought she was just lying about staying with her family when they crossed over to the human world, knowing she would be separated, but this.. oh my god. This girl knew ever since ch143 that she was going to lose her memories of her family and straight up lied to them about it. Granted, only a few days passed from when she returned from The 7 Walls up until they all crossed over to the human world, but still, I.. don't know how to feel. I knew since the prison break she had great acting skills so I'm impressed that she managed to pull off yet another wonderful performance, but wow.. I really hoped she wouldn't! To keep such an important and life changing secret from her family, who are all so important to her, I can't imagine how hard it must have been for her knowing this while dealing with the entire capital attack and GF plantation raid. Fighting so hard and succeeding in achieving a bright, happier future for everyone but herself.. ow, my heart.

Some people are fine with the memory loss, others aren't. If anything, at least she's the only one who forgot? I think it would've been worse if everyone else forgot about Emma instead, so having the promise only hurt her is fine.. well, it's not, clearly, but you get what I mean.

And if demon god wasn't on my nerves enough already, the little prat decides to basically photoshop every family member out of the photos Emma kept this entire time. I'm touched she still had the photos in her possession, but now this upsets me so much. Upon seeing the first set of raws and learning Emma lost her memories, I hoped that she could possibly remember them by looking back at these photos if she still had them. But no. Demon god doesn't want me to be happy or get my hopes up. It would've been such a cool idea though. We know Ray originally requested the camera because he needed to strobe for the taser, but he continued to take pictures, not only to keep up the act to prevent Isabella from getting suspicious, but to give said photos to Emma because he knew how important their family is to her. I would've loved it if something so important from the first couple arcs came back at the very end to help Emma regain her memories.

Not only that, but demon god also got rid of her id number? Like.. really? I don't know why that bothers me so much but it does. I know the id brands just proved that the kids were meant to be nothing but food. Of course I know that they're all so much more than that and I should be happy Emma lost hers, because it truly means she's free, but the number was a part of her you know? It would've been fine if every cattle child lost their identifier, but since it was only her it makes me think demon god wanted it to be that much harder for Emma to remember her past and family. That's what bothers me. That even now, after they all crossed over and don't have to deal with demons anymore, demon god still has the audacity ability to make Emma suffer. If she still had her number, I'm sure she would've questioned it, much like Ray did when he was younger (my mind thinks back to ch28, that one memory of him looking at his neck in a mirror). Maybe she would've realized that the people in her dreams also have the same neck numbers, if only faintly. (it must be so weird for Demizu to draw Emma now and not include her number after all this time)

That leads me to wonder if Emma has questioned the rest of her appearance yet. I would assume she's still missing her left ear, since her hair is still covering that side, so does she ever wonder about why it's missing? What about the scars on her body? We personally haven't seen them, but you can't tell me her back and abdomen looks perfect and clean after getting stabbed by Lewis. Yes I know, scars heal with time, but the scar on Lucas' face was still recognizable after 13 years. Same with Zack and his many unfading scars. So does Emma question where hers came from?

Moving on, a month passes and still no memories, however Musica's necklace seems to be the cause of Emma's vivid dreams, like it somehow brings life to her feelings. We see the necklace constantly, not only because Emma wears it, but on volume covers and other color pages as well. It's always been shown off as this important item and yet it hasn't really served a purpose yet. Emma recieved the necklace back in ch51 and the only thing its done so far was show her that one old vision at Cuvitidala in ch101. It'll be a real easy way to solve everything by having the necklace just conveniently bring back her memories, so I get why some people might not like the idea, but at this point I'd be fine with it.

Figures she would end up in the human world with someone who can sympathize with her pain. Old dude lost his family due to war but at least he can remember them. He asks if Emma would want to see her family, if they're alive, and she remains unsure and lost. She doesn't know who these dream people are to her, why they call out "Emma" or why it makes her feel better.

This panel.. this one right here is what breaks me. Our girl is so upset and she can't even understand why. We know why you're crying hun, it's because you miss your family. Your memories may have faded but your feelings for them still live on with you! I have no doubt that love you just as much too! My poor girl, someone send me her location so I can go and hug her!

Emma might have given up trying to remember who she was and live a new life, but if she did encounter her family again, I hope she would be excited to meet them as new people. Maybe they could all start over. Over time they could gently remind her of her past, and if Emma truly can't remember, I hope they'll accept her regardless.

And a name change? I'm.. mmm frustrated. Yeah it makes sense since she couldn't remember hers and would need a new one anyway, but aahh, really? No id identifier, no memories, no name; it's like she's a new character. I was never a fan of the amnesia trope, like she's such a great character and gets built up wonderfully, and now it's like you reset her to zero. Yeah I know, deep down she's still the happy go lucky girl we all know and love, who's strong and capable to still smile even now, but.. man, idk anymore. This whole chapter hurts me.

There's a dim light at the end of the tunnel because we get a glimpse of Ray, Gilda and.. at first I thought it was Don but that person is way too short, so Phil? Regardless, I gotta give them some credit. It may have been a couple months, (remember, old dude said he could't call for help until spring and there's flowers in the ground now) but they've already managed to find where she might be in this new, large world. Please, turn around though! She's so close to you guys, she's right there! Notice her antenna or something, I beg you!

Demon god said that even if Emma met her family, she wouldn't remember them, but I still have small hopes. Emma claim's she stopped having the dreams and given up trying to remember her past, but maybe that short amount of time believing in them was enough. Aside from the necklace which connected her feelings to her unconscious mind, the five sense can also recall memories. Perhaps if she heard her name now, outside of a dream, something in her mind will click. Maybe she would get that warm feeling again she once longed for. Sense of smell and taste are usually most effective in bringing back memories so maybe just being near them or having them cook for her could also help. I know the sense of touch usually works for when you personally touch something, but if it's possible to also recall memories by being touched, then please, for the love of god, let Ray pat Emma's head again! He's done it countless time over the years.. can you imagine if upon meeting and learning that she has no memories, Ray is just like "no worries, you're still the same Emma to us," and while he pats her head, she's like wait hold up, major deja vu, I feel like I felt something like that happened before. I'm probably only getting my hopes up real high with that idea (since old dude just patted her head and nothing) but bro.. I would honestly cry if something so simple and nostalgic as a head pat helps Emma remember her family even the tiniest bit.

And yes, I'm worried Norman isn't around. Please don't let me be right again by having him stay behind due to his health issues. Just let him be in another search group somewhere else okay? I'll accept that. It's odd he wouldn't be working alongside Ray but whatever, split your best minds up to create equally powerful teams, that's fine. It only worries me because now we might not get one last full-score trio hug like I originally hoped! I swear having a hug like that as the very last panel of the series would've been perfectly fine with me after everything that just happened. But now.. aahhh, we'll see.

I can't believe the series ends next week. There's still so much I want to see and know. I pray there's a happy ending for everyone. I want Emma with her family. I want her to remember them. I want one last full-score trio hug. Shirai, don't let us down! You played with my feelings so much within the past year, so please make all the stress and tears worth it! Give me an ending that will satisfy me so much that TPN replaces Black Lagoon as my favorite series! Go ahead, I dare you! Ya see that beautiful panel? Give that to us and not have it be a fantasy! (pretty please??)