#she would take one thing a random nice person does for her and

[vulpixisananimal]

(You breathe a sigh of relief as you open the door to the homestead. This was your destination, Riverside homestead. It was placed directly on your family's route from Jouvente to Worlworth, the city Ramos' guardian lived in. The sun had almost disappeared, geetting here by twilight wasn't bad.)

(It was a sizable building. With two stories and stables for any horses. There were a few broken down buildings around it that suggested it used to be a much bigger complex. up a hill, you could make out a large tree, it looked like it was a Favor Tree.)

(When you entered the main door, you were greeted to a cozy and large common area, a main desk of sorts was to one side. There were stairs leading up, and a few doors, one of them you were pretty sure lead to a kitchen.)

(There was a lady sitting at one of the tables, who, upon seeing you enter, got to and went over to the desk.) "Welcome in! Got here just in time!"

"Haha, had to run to make it." (You reply, putting on your smile. The rest of your family was coming in behind you. Oh yeah, you reach up and take those singing stones out of your ear. You still don't remember who gave them to you, but Mal liked them. You did too.)

(The person at the desk smiled seeing Mirabelle enter.) "Miss!! You're back!!" (She said excitedly.)

"H-huh?!?" (Mira looked surprised for a second, before smiling.) "O-oh yes!! I told you I'd visit again once the country was saved!!"

(Oh yeah. Mirabelle and Isabeau would have stayed here on their journey, over a year ago now.)

"Well looks like ya won! This lot the rest of the great saviors of Vaugarde?"

"Not me, or Ramos here." (Nille said, patting Ramos shoulder. She looked for a place to sit down.) "We're just along for the ride."

"Don't care, c'mon in, take a seat, staying the night?"

"O-oh yes! We we're probably going to make it here tomorrow, b-but-" (Mira starts, going over to the desk.)

(Odile cuts Mirabelle off, joining her.) "-But if I spend one more night in the forest I will go postal."

(. . . Not bringing up the sadness is probably a good call. That would just cause a panic. You let Odile and Mirabelle deal with rooms and such, you wander around the common area.)

(Frozen in time. . .)

(You still couldn't get over it. You got frozen in time. Months after the kings defeat, despite there being no sign of frozen time anywhere in the country. And no sadness anywhere, either.)

(Well, except for Ramos. But Ramos was turned into a sadness. And turned back when you broke that emblem embedded with mind craft. Does that mean this sadness was also someone turned into one? Apparently there wasn't any visible star, and it smelled of sugar, not mint. What was it then?)

"That alright Sif?" (Mira called over, oops.)

"Huh? What?" (You reply, you weren't paying attention.)

"There's only a few rooms left, you and Isa ok with sharing?"

"O-oh! Oh sure!" (You smile, heh, that'll be nice, sharing a room. You hadn't gotten to do that yet. At Bambouche you all stayed at Nille and Bonnies. At Jouvente you had a solo room. So finally you'd get some time just, the two of you. Well, four? Five of you? Heh, that was something to talk about.)

(Back to wandering and thinking. The common area was nice, it was well furnished, with a lot of random trinkets around. On the walls shelves, etc. Hmm, there's a sign near the front door that's covered with some cloth. Weird. You go over to it and uncover it.)

(It's. . . Oh! Your language!)

"O-oh! Careful, that'll give you a headache." (You turn, the lady at the desk was calling over to you.)

"How'd you get this?" (You say, now with a real smile on your face.)

"Huh?" (That got her by surprise.) "Oh! Uh, that's one of the things my gramps put up when he started the place. Never got the heart to take it down."

"Hah! Must have been a funny guy." (Your smile gets wider.) "It says 'make a wish, check it thrice, stay here a while, don't mind the mice.'"

"HA! He sure was!" (They lean on the desk.) "You can read that? Those other guys said they could only translate the first couple lines."

"The-" (What.) "Who?"

(Walk over to the desk, we need to know who-)

(And hello to you too, Mal. You do walk over, though, and ask.) "Someone else was reading that?"

"Yeah!" (She tapped her temple.) "Couple who're traveling, said they'd been researching that, Island stuff. Figured out the first part of that sign, asked about gramps and-"

"Are they still here?!? Where'd they go??" (You need to know, WE need to know. Mira and Odile leaned to the side, it was your time.)

"Woah there bud, I'd be a bad host if I just told you that kinda stuff." (They put their hands up.) "I know, I know, island stuff is. . . Important. It was important to gramps too."

(. . . Right.)

(She probably had more than a handful of islanders who'd recognized that sign and had a. . . Bad reaction. You still had your silver coin, after all.) "S-sorry."

"No issue, though, how'd you read it? It gives everyone else a headache."

"Savior secrets~" (You say, sticking your tongue out.)

"He's always like this." (Odile said, sighing.) "I am so, so sorry."

"Ha! Nah It's fine. Oh yeah!"

"Name's Jan (she/they). Been managing this place for a while now, y'all are all happy to stay anytime."

"Oh! T-thank you Jan-" (Mira starts.)

"Free of charge, naturally." (Jan finishes.) "No buts! You saved the country!"

"B-but-!"

"Don't try, Mirabelle." (Odile shakes her head.) "I've tried paying for supplies before to no avail."

"Hmph, fine." (Mira pouted.) "Thank you very much, I-I just, feel a bit weird about it."

(Ha, you kinda did, too. You were still kinda broke though, you had two silver coins to your name and didn't want to get rid of either of them. So you did appreciae the freebies.)

(Just take the free food and shelter, Siffrin.)

(You know, you know. It just, still felt weird, taking things for free.)

(Jan handed over the room keys. A room with three beds for Odile, Mira, and Ramos. A room with two beds for Nille and Bonnie, and a room of two for you and Isabeau. Stay for a few days, get on the road again. It sounded nice! You and Odile headed upstairs to check the rooms out.)

(You unlock the door to your room, sizeable, little table and chair, wardrobe, window, and-)

"O-oh."

"Something wrong, Siffrin?" (Odile leans over to look in your room.) ". . . Hah!"

"S-shut uuuuupppp." (You hide your face in your cloak.)

"My my, is there something wrong with sharing a bed, Siffrin?"

"I-it just, feels," (You mumble.) "it feels kinda different i-if we're, y'know-"

"Bonded-to-be?" (Odile teases.)

(You choke on your words, your blushing, really, really hard.) "I-I-I'm I'm gonna, get, uh-"

"I understand Siffrin. I'll see you tomorrow, if you survive."

"Night. . ."

(You close the door, stars. What a day. What a weird stupid day. You put your pack down by the SINGLE bed and take a breath. You fought a sadness, you were walking all day, you found another blinding island thing. . . You try to open the window.)

(Great, the window didn't even open. It was stuck.)

(You sit down on the bed.)

(. . .)

(What, have nothing to add, Mal?)

(I do not.)

(You do, c'mon, share it.)

(I do not like this homestead. I do not like Jan. I do not like that there is a sadness, or that it froze us in time.)

(Well? What do you want ME to do about it.)

(Nothing. That's why I didn't want to bring it up.)

(What about that island phrase? Since that seems to be YOUR buisness.)

(. . . It's the equivelant of one of those, sarcastic, cheesy slogans some have in their homes here.)

(What? Like one of those "Change, Craft, Care" things?)

(If you must know, yes.)

(That makes you laugh. Even if your home is gone, some people still have those cheesy nicknacks.)

(Jan could not understand it. And did not mention their grandparent.)

(. . . Right. You'll ask about it in the morning, but you're tired. You start getting dressed into your nighties.)

(Isabeau. . . What do you do about Isabeau. You really like, no, no you LOVE him! You really, really do! Whenever you're around him you get a weird, bubbly feeling that you've never felt in your entire life.)

(But, what do you do about that?!? What would be ok?!? How, how do you talk to him about it! STARS why was this so complicated!! At least in a play relationships had a script, but trying to script out your relationship with someone in real life just, doesn't work.)

(You knew that all too well.)

(Go to Bonnie, favorite foods are rice, pineapple, and samosas WITH potato NO cheese. Go help them get stronger, trip, hug. See Odile, get the book from the bakery, find a clearing, talk. See Mirabelle, ask about papers, talk. Go see Isabeau. . .)

(You get the idea.)

(You had the perfect day down to a formula. You scripted it, orchistrated it, crafted it. But that in itself made it less real. The first time it was a back and forth, you all played your parts, and got your rewards. But every time after? You were the director telling them where to stand. For an audience you could not see.)

(. . . You did miss it. It was nice-)

"Hey Sif- O-oh--"

(You freeze up. That was Isa's voice, and, a-and-)

"S-sorryIshouldhaveknockedsorrysorry-!"

"N-noit'sfineit'sfineI-I'mfine." (You desperatly and quickly cover yourself. You dared not look at him.) "J-j-just, just, u-uh--"

"I-I didn't see anything!! I promise!!"

"A-alrightalright, alright, t-turn around a second I'll finish up quickly."

"O-okay, I'm not looking, sorry, oh crab I'm sorry Sif-"

"I-it's ok! Just, just give me a second." (You breathe in, and out. Stars, you could NEVER live this down!! You very quickly get your nighties on. Stars, your head feels hot.) "Ok, o-ok I'm good."

(You turn around, Isabeau was banging his head softly on the wall before turning around. He had the biggest blush you'd ever seen, impressive, honestly.) "I-I'm, so sorry Sif. . ."

"Y-you're good!! You're good, my back was to you so it wasn't that bad right?" (You smile at him.)

(He looks to the side, blush growing.)

(You squint.) ". . . . Did you see anything?"

". . . . . . . . . . . . . M-maybe-"

(Oh!)

(Oh okay! Got it! This is actually a nightmare and you're still asleep in Jouvente! Wow! It makes so much sense now! Stars, how could you-)

(Shut up, Siffrin.)

(You wince, right, Mal du Pays was here. Sorry.)

(Isa bowed his head.) "I-I'm really really really sorry."

(. . . . . Ah Stars to it. You wink at him.) "Hope you liked what you saw then."

"WH-" (Isabeau froze, processing, prioessing, processing. . .)

(Stars, Siffrin. You are as bad as Loop. Eugh.)

"W-well! I'm going to bed! If you get changed I promise I wont peek."

". . . . . One bed?" (It sounded like the air was being squeezed from Isabeau.) "I-I mean I'm fine with one bed it's just I thought it was two and y'know I just thought that-"

"N-no I was, uh, taken by surprise too! It's fine!" (Taken by surprise? You were being teased by Odile. Can we just go to sleep already?)

"R-right. . ." (It souned like Isa was getting slowly killed.)

(You turn around, getting comfortable. STARS how embaressing. . .)

(Why do you like him?)

(Why? Why not! He's kind! Funny, smart AND strong! He's just, uh. . .)

(You trust him.)

(And you don't?)

(. . .)

(Isabeau finishes up getting ready for bed, you feel him climb in the other side. You turn around.) "Hey."

"H-hey. . ." (He replies, still blushing.)

"Fancy meeting you here."

"W-what a coincidence, right?"

(You laugh softly, stars, now that you're in bed the days exhaustion was catching up to you.) "Is it, fine that we're sharing? A bed?"

"Y-yeahjust-" (He looks away all blushy.) "S-since we're. . . Y'know. . ."

(. . . Stars. He's beautiful.)

(You didn't think you'd like someone like this, you never really got it, after all. But now? With Isabeau here? Next to you in a comfortable, warm bed. You get it.)

(. . . . . Your eyes feel heavy. You can't have The Conversation tonight.) ". . . We can talk about it tomorrow, ok?"

"O-oh! Alright then, I am pretty tired. . ." (You had both been walking all day, of course you're tired.)

(. . . You wish you could kiss him goodnight. Not tonight.)

(Let's just go to sleep.)

"Night, Isa."

"Night, Sif!"

(Night Mal.)

(. . . Just get to sleep. Night.)

[rockybloo]

Slightly (or extremely) unrealistic scenario but it’s funny (at least to me) so I’m sharing it:

A random person (preferably a woman) asks Sweetheart and Bitterbat “Do you think I’m pretty?” And, Sweetheart being the sweetheart she is (pun intended 🙂) says “Of course!” Bitterbat on the other hand is like “Yeah, but not as pretty as my girlfriend.” And then Sweetheart just looks at him with a serious face and says “Did you just tear down another woman in the age of the Barbie movie?” Bitterbat confused starts sputtering and before he can say anything else she drags him away saying “We’re having a talk about this when we get home.” Leaving the poor individual just as confused.

…The point is Sweetheart is a feminist no doubt (actually some doubt because you’re the creator so…)

I thought the Barbie movie was cute but...it was def very much 2010s Tumblr feminism for me. As in it just...really lacked dimension for my tastes.

So I don't particularly see it as something that speaks to Sweetheart save for her pointing at Ken during the earlier scenes and telling Bitterbat "Look it's you".

This is a long one so buckle up

In a situation where a woman randomly asked them (while they were their civilian selves) their opinion on her appearance, I imagine this would happen on a mall date where they are probably shopping for make up or clothing. And I imagine this is just someone wanting some outside views on herself to make an opinion on what to get. Or maybe it could even be a random street interaction.

Sweetheart would of course say she looked pretty since...well she isn't called sweetheart for nothing. And she would hype her up some to give her more confidence just for a extra nice cherry on top since she knows how it feels to have low self esteem when it comes to appearances.

Sweetheart also knows her man. She knows he thinks she is beauty herself and no one compares. She can also read Bitterbat's body language and knows he can be blunt as hell. She knows regardless of gender, that man will hurt someone's feelings.

So all she needs to do is give Bitterbat look. A very specific look he knows very well.

It's that "BEHAVE" look.

Bitterbat does what Sweetheart tells him, verbal or not, and he agrees with Sweetheart with a big ole artificially sweet smile. He enters that good ole customer service mode he takes when he knows being "himself" might lead to upsetting Sweetheart, and compliments the woman's appearance enough to send her on her way.

He's a smart guy and he knows his way around emotions very well. It's what makes him dangerous because of how well he can play people.

And once the woman walks away, beaming and happy, Bitterbat drops the act and Sweetheart just gives that amused sigh as she shakes her head some.

"Boy, if you don't stop being mean" But there's a chuckle to it because she finds it somewhat entertaining.

Bitterbat just does that smug ass expression where his forked tongue peeks from his mouth before pecking her on the cheek.

As for Sweetheart being a feminist, I don't really slap labels on OCs save for their race or ethnicity, their sexual orientation, and gender identity.

Labels don't give good enough insight into how a character really thinks so I don't wanna give one to a character and have people misread them.

So, to give her stance on gender based stuff, Sweetheart certainly believes everyone should be equal and that men shouldn't be deemed better than women. She also doesn't believe all men are complete heartless assholes or vilianizing masc things. Nor should more feminine things be deemed weaker and pathetic.

She also loves trans people and believes that women's rights should include trans women as well and that trans rights are human rights. And she believes that change cannot be achieved through the demonization of people just because of their gender identity or sexuality.

If that is what Feminism stands for then yeah, she totally is one.

[moonsiechild]

Something horrible or tragic happens that we hear come off from the news or from any person’s mouth

My mom: Oh, it’s so funny how much this mirrors my shortcomings and my suffering… 😞 You know… The suffering that you sometimes, my family sometimes, and a lot of the time the world inflicts on me? But oh, what if this sad story was actually about me? 🥺 What if something like this happens to me or worse? 🥺👉👈

[imafoolishfragilespine]

i'm just like ugh i gotta figure out where to get this x ray and when i should do it this week and i'm just worried about walking in without an appointment even though it says you can and like them not having the machine or a person to do it or whatever since i went into one place on the list already and they did not have x-rays

and then i've got this birthday thing which idk where it's going to be so idk if i should take a lyft or not and then i'll have to either exercise in the morning or choose that as my skip day

and then i'll just be worrying about my test results and not knowing if the doctor is going to call before my follow up or WHAT is going to happen and i just. cannot relax.

i just want to be done with doctors i really fucking do like just tell me what's wrong and let me be DONE like this follow up is gonna be the eighth fucking time i've seen a doctor in some form since all this weird shit started and if i don't get any answers i'm gonna be mad. i mean i'd rather not get bad news of course but i figure things are already mildly crappy in my body so like it's not like i can't get used to that i just can't stand the idea of it getting worse

[dcxdpdabbles]

DCxDP Fic Idea: New Management

It starts off small, in controlled, barely noticeable areas of Gotham.

Over days, the litter and trash vanish, the sidewalks are washed and cleaned, and even building yards long since abandoned are trimmed. No one notices at first because Gotham is so used to ignoring how dirty everything is until Poison Ivy makes a public announcement thanking the person who cleaned up Gotham's parks.

You know, while she was tearing up that one street with her vine monster.

After the Bats had her locked away pending a trial, they stopped to look around and realized, yes, someone had been cleaning house. No one really knows who, but things have started to change. Streetlights are replaced, graffiti is painted over, and cracked windows are fixed. It's a nice thought, but all this had the gangs up in arms, especially when their tagging disappeared.

To control the goodie-two-shoes, a few gangs burn down a few local parks- mostly the ones near or around Crime Alley- and they also loot the smaller businesses. It's a warning that the mystery housekeeper should be reminded of their station, but- well, it's all for nothing because, like magic, the following night, the damage is repaired and somehow better than before.

What's crazy is the water change. Everyone notices that right away.

Gotham's water system was just as corrupted and descriptive as its class system. If you were one of the elites- your water was clean and crisp- if you were one of the poor- your water was practically tar with how contaminated it was. Anyone in between got a fifty-fifty chance of drinkable water, depending on what side of the city they lived on.

It became an identifier, really. Depending on how often you were seen at stores buying bottled water, people could tell how well off your family was.

That's why, on a random Wednesday, Gotham lost their collective mind that the entire water system was fixed. Regardless of class, every household had clear, scent-free water from the tabs.

The few who wandered outside trying to figure out what in the world was happening were left stunned at the sight of Gotham's surrounding bodies of water.

They were clean.

All the rivers, the harbors, the silly little fountains found around Old Gotham- everything. It was safe to swim in them now. That was just wrong.

"What's happening?" Jason growls, crouching at one of Wayne Manor's main windows. His eyes are barely visible over the edge, allowing him to peek out into the yard, but he must not be fully visible, lest he become a target.

"I don't know," Tim hisses, taking a similar position on the second floor. He grips the communicator with a white-knuckle grip, trying his best to ground himself. "I just don't know. There are no witnesses, no evidence, no clues whatsoever on who's doing this to the city!"

"I don't like this!"

"No one does, Jason," Bruce intervenes; the accompanying sound of keys typing is familiar background noise. He's still in the cave, attempting to run through all reports of horrified Gothamites on social media, trying to find a pattern. "Babs? Do you have any new updates?"

"No!" She hisses, her typing sounding far more aggressive. "I can't find anything on those responsible. Nothing on the internet, nothing on public camera feeds, and nothing on rumors through dark web chats. It's like I'm trying to track a ghost!"

"This isn't natural, B," Steph cuts in. She's hiding in her bedroom closet, voice low in case her mom hears. After they realize some new lunatic is running loose in Gotham, her mom calls her back home to barricade them. If they had a bomb shelter, they would have been in it long ago.

"It's worse than we think," Duke huffs. He's somewhere near the top floor, having chosen a higher vantage point, hoping his meta powers would spot someone coming towards the manor. "I think I see glimpses of blue in the sky. If this continues at this rate, we'll have a clear blue sky in about two hours."

Multiple gasps of horror are heard throughout the communication lines. Bruce starts to type faster, barking orders for everyone to remain where they are and not go gather information. They had no idea what they were dealing with.

Damian stands with a confused Cass, Dick, and Alfred. The only bats not originated from Gotham, so while they can claim to have years in the city, none of them truly know. "I do not understand. Is this not beneficial to Gotham?"

"It may be too much at once, Master Damian." The Bulter tells him carefully. He only speaks that slowly when Alfred thinks of every word before saying it. "Whoever is behind this must not be from Gotham. If they were, they know that people would lose their collective minds upon the improvements."

"But who could be responsible?" Cass asks, watching Jason duck and army crawl to a new window once some sunlight manages to break through the clouds where he was originally hiding.

"I wish I knew Miss Cass."

Meanwhile, Danny Fenton leans back in his computer chair in a dimension of hope and a skip away. He laces his fingers together, bending them until satisfying cracks are heard. It was a productive hour of work, but he thinks now that his virtual city had cleaner water, his NPCs should start healing and developing better.

He was suspicious of Madam Gotham—a new ghost that appeared within his territory of the Ghost Zone—but after a quick conversation, he decided to befriend her. Danny is glad he did, seeing as she was in danger of fading away. Her core had suffered severe damage due to denying her obsession for so long.

Danny could do nothing for her. Madam Gotham needed professional help that only certain Yetis could offer. Although the Yetis usually turned away anyone not of their kind, with Danny backing her up, they had been willing to take in Madam Gotham.

She had been stubborn, though, refusing to get help because she was too busy playing her silly little game. The computer she played it on was unique to her realm and could not withstand the cold temeture of the Far Frozen. Danny was literally watching her melt—a horrific reminder of Dani and her siblings' disabling—before he could take it anymore.

Only after agreeing to watch her video game did she decide to be moved to the Far Frozen to receive medical treatment. Now, Danny never really liked those farming simulator games, but this was different in the sense that the city was already there.

His job was to further develop the city into a utopia. It was interesting to learn what modern issues the city had and how he could make decisions based on point costs on what to fix.

He gained points from making his citizens happier, supporting the Bats—the city's defenders—or choosing to develop options that significantly raised the value of his city.

It was rather addicting, really. He could see how Madam Gotham got so sucked in, even though it didn't really have much action for him to make. Mostly, he would let his citizens react to his new choices and use his points to delete trash and gunk.

There were some side quests he liked to work on, too, like helping certain citizens with drug addiction, depression, anxiety, or anger issues. Danny has no idea why Madam Gotham allowed so many to develop so badly, so every day, he would give them all one good luck point to brighten their days.

He had three full tabs of characters, a brief explanation of their lives, and whatever issues Danny could make them go through. He would tackle the number of homeless youth next by fixing up the city's affordable housing and infrastructure.

It was a bit narcissistic of Madam Gotham to name her game town "Gotham City," but it's better than any name Danny could have come up with.

[sant-riley]

[Random Task force 141 × gen z! member headcanons]

A/N: Reader goes by the codename Teddy in my writing! Along with she/her pronouns :) I am also extremely biased with Ghost so her main pairing is more towards with him compared to the others <3. I know absolutely nothing about the military so this is not accurate I am so sorry💀.

CWs: Dark Humor, Age gaps, Simping, crude humor, cursing. (not sure what else but lmk!)

Chances are, you're the youngest in the entirety of Task Force 141. Just a good couple of years younger than Gaz.

When Laswell brought her in to meet the group, they couldn't help but stare at her in confusion. A tiny girl who couldn't have been older than any of them. Soap couldn't help but chuckle while Ghost nudged him in the side to shut him up.

"This is your new rookie on the team, her callsign is Teddy. Treat her well."

All the men nodded, watching the younger woman shyly smile and wave towards them.

First they realized that her humor was, in Ghost's words, fucked.

Any minor inconvenience had her saying she wanted to be hit by a car or some type of bodily harm, Price quickly whirling around with eyes widened. "Now, I don't think that warranted that kind of response, don't you think?" "Oh it definitely did, Captain." And she'd walk away without another word.

He swears he gets gray hairs from everytime you make casual talk of you dying. He actively tells the others to check on you bc he genuinely don't know if you're serious or not.

Ghost is not up to date with shit, man uses no social medias oncesoever so everything she spouts is wildly out of pocket. References to basic things like tiktok, Twitter, Instagram? He just silently stares at you like you're on drugs. You can't really use your personal phone on base but you try your best to explain memes to him. He sighs and rubs his forehead with a groan of "I'm too old for this shit, teds." "Oh come on! You have to at LEAST know the meme about the marines eating crayons!" "What the fuck are you on about?

The only ones who know vaguely what the fuck you're on about sometimes are Gaz and Soap, despite them still being a few years older.

Granted, they are not caught up with everything but they actively make it a point on leave to try and be up to date bc of you and your mannerisms. Plus it makes you happy when they fire back a quote they learned.

Can yall imagine Soap on tiktok, what random shit he'd have on his fyp bc he doesn't know how the algorithm works 😭.

Teddy has made every single one of them a personal playlist when she does have her phone, Soap once caught her adding songs and hasn't stopped teasing her since. Price and Ghost pretend not to care and barks at Soap to leave her alone but they're equally curious. Ghost contemplates stealing her phone to see it.

Doesn't matter how serious or dark their job may be, you simp for fictional characters, loudly. Price has learned to tune it out, Ghost although slightly jealous, finds it endearing, Gaz and Soap indulge you and will actively ask about why you like the characters you do and how much you love them bc they like to see you excited. It's a nice feeling when they're always in life or death missions.

You're the smallest one in here okay, everyone can easily throw you without batting an eye so they all take turns training you! They all despite knowing you can take care of yourself, would still like to teach you all they know so should you come against a taller/stronger opponent, you'll be okay.

You are the most protected person in the entire squad, esp when going out for drinks, Ghost will put you in the middle between him and Price and basically make a wall of muscle around you. He says he doesn't care and that he just doesn't want to be pestered by creepy people coming up to you but he will literally stare down any man or woman who even tries. He is the creepy one in everyone else's scenario. Soap just laughs and tosses back his drink.

They all notice your ticks and tells, seeing your leg start to shake when you're anxious, when you start cracking your fingers when you're restless, how you will avoid eye contact at any cost. They start to find ways to soothe you in their own ways. Price will give you a pat on your shoulder, sending you a smile.

Gaz nudges you with his body to take your attention off the situation, or he'll simply start asking you random dumbass questions just to see your face change.

Soap will, if he has gotten permission before, just pick you up and throw you over his shoulder, running around with you while you scream for him to let you go. Is also not against tickling you straight up to get you to smile.

Ghost tried to be as subtle as he can be. If yall are sitting close to each other, he'll make sure some part of his body is gently pressed against yours. Whether it be his foot, thigh, hand, some part of him will ground you. You try and reassure him that you know he doesn't care for personal touch but he just says to shut up.

Meeting Graves was a trip, for everyone involved besides you and Grave. Absolutely having no control over calling him a irl Fix it Felix. You were on Graves shitlist and honestly you wouldn't be surprised he betrayed yall for that one comment bc of how angry it made him.

Constantly being told to be quiet, but you cannot help it and will make little quips over comms. Ghost takes after you and starts to say horrible "dad" jokes that make you choke trying to hold back. Soap hates both of you and calls you unfunny.

They realize you're impulsive, especially when you show the amount of tattoos you have.

"I joined the military to fund my tattoo addiction." "You know what? That's not even a surprise."

Going home on leave is always a bitter experience, you never look excited to go home. So one of the guys (usually ghost) will offer you to come with them. It helps 3/4 all live somewhere in England so it's easy to see them/ take trips to their place.

They're all attached despite knowing better. They can't help it and they know they care for you so much more than other force members.

Ghost and Soap bristle when Alejandro makes a mention that he'd offer you a spot in his team, impressed with how you can take opponents twice your size.

"¿Te interesaría quedarte en México?"

"The Hell she will."

-

If you'd like to be tagged in future works, please comment under my rules that are pinned to my blog!

[jenscx]

DAYDREAMIN’ — kim minjeong x f!reader

being forced to marry someone was lunacy, or at least minjeong thought so. how could a mere stranger be her lifelong partner? it was simply impossible (well, not until you came along).

TAGS — fluff, pinch of angst, arranged marriage!au, ceo!minjeong, cold!minjeong, strangers to lovers, making out at the end, silly!yn

WORDCOUNT — 3.8k

you rub your hands gingerly around the ceramic mug filled with warm tea. your footsteps resound against the cold hardwood floors, the sound dampened by the fluffy dog slippers you were wearing. finally reaching the door at the end of the hallway, you take a deep breath and peer into the room through the crack left open.

“winter?” you whisper, scared to alert the girl working tirelessly at her desk. the woman perks up, an eyebrow raised as she shoots daggers at your cowering figure.

“yes?” her voice remains steely, cold.

the mug in your hands feels cooler than before.

“i made you some tea, it’s chamomile,” you say, nervously taking small steps closer to her. minjeong stands up from her desk, eyebrows furrowed and an annoyed look remains on her face.

she reaches out a hand to take the mug, her face scrunching as she feels the warmth of the mug.

“thank you,” minjeong replies quietly, taking her seat at the desk again. nodding, you turn around to leave. as your fingers swirl around the door knob, you hear minjeong’s aloof voice, “knock the next time you come in.”

your head swerves around.

“yes, winter.”

at the corner of your eye, you spot minjeong’s satisfied smile as she sips on the tea happily. an unfamiliar feeling blooms in your chest. it’s almost akin to pride. due to minjeong’s usual unfriendly and aloof nature, making her smile was abnormal. all you could do was savour the moment and go on with your day.

meanwhile, minjeong leans back in her office chair, taking in small gulps of the tea as her free hand works busily on the keyboard. she scrolls down, eyes catching the stray title of an email.

‘re: invitation to dinner.’

her eyes narrow warily. clicking on the email, minjeong reads the rough synopsis. after doing so, her hand inches towards her phone, dialling her father’s number hastily. for a few moments, the phone continues ringing. minjeong almost gives up until he finally picks up.

“good evening, it is quite late, minjeong.”

minjeong rolls her eyes. “i know but i wanted to tell you this in person. i do not want to attend that dinner.”

her father makes a noise of indignation.

“it is an obligation. you cannot reject this.”

“i can and i will, father. you have made me marry into a loveless marriage and you still want more?” minjeong questions incredulously, “i am afraid i do not have more to give. on sunday i will have a business meeting to attend instead. i am not available.”

the man on the phone sighs, “it does not matter. you have agreed to the principles of the situation. the union between our families have helped your company tremendously, have they not?”

minjeong scowls, but she does not deny that the marriage has helped her company flourish, “it was barely an agreement, more of a forceful acknowledgement.”

“then acknowledge this once more,” her father’s voice becomes more and more stern, “she is your wife. not a maid, not a random person who has barged into your life.” minjeong disagrees. you were quite literally a random person who barged into your life.

“does she not treat you well? do you not have the basic courtesy to show your own gratitude? or are you going to remain as cold as people make you out to be?” her father hits a soft spot. if there was one thing winter hated, it would be people judging her based on her looks. she admits, she does look rather unwelcoming at times. but treating her own wife as such, wasn’t that proof of her unfriendliness?

you hadn’t treated her badly, but she can sense the fear in your eyes whenever you interact with her, scared that somehow she’ll treat you like a stranger. it feels nice that even with your fear, you still try your best to make the most out of this situation. minjeong should do the same. it’s only basic courtesy, as her father said.

“i am sure that the girl we have chosen for you will make a good wife. this will not be a loveless marriage if you open your eyes.”

“fine,” minjeong says through gritted teeth, “i’ll see you on sunday.”

“of course you will. good night, minjeong.”

“good night, father.”

you could say it was the best sleep you’ve ever had. finally relieved the burden of annoying winter, you went to bed content and calm. stretching out your arms, you gaze at the clock hung on the wall. it was barely eight and minjeong was still awake at one when you visited her. maybe you could make breakfast for her before she wakes up.

huffing with determination, you get out of bed and ready yourself. after taking a shower, you head down the stairs, eyes squinting at the figure in the living room.

“good morning,” minjeong says quietly. she’s sitting on the couch, watching the news. you’re stunned at the sudden appearance of her. you didn’t expect that she would be awake at this time.

“good morning,” you finally respond, conscious of the way your cheeks burned. minjeong paid you no mind like always. walking towards the kitchen, your eyes widen at the food spread out on the kitchen island. you hear footsteps approaching behind you.

her voice reaches your ears gently, “thank you for the tea last night. i made you breakfast as a thank you.”

“ah…” you can’t stop yourself from smiling, “thank you.” even though you can spot some edges of the toast being burnt, you felt gratitude simmering at minjeong’s kind action.

taking a bite of the toast, you resist the urge to grimace at the smoky taste. minjeong looked genuinely concerned for her cooking skills. you reassure her by putting up a thumbs up. the tips of her lips twitch ever so slightly but you consider it a win.

as you’re devouring your breakfast, minjeong clears her throat. you turn to her, cheeks stuffed with bread.

“are you available on sunday?” she asks, “my father has arranged a dinner with our families.”

you try to recall if you had anything going on.

“yeah, i think i’m free.”

minjeong nods.

“what restaurant are we going to?” you ask.

your wife shrugs, “probably a random restaurant in a hotel. my father likes those.”

“don’t you have a meeting on that day though?”

minjeong’s eyes nearly protrude out of her head. “how do you know that?”

you laugh, “i saw your business calendar. it’s with sung hanbin’s company right?”

“yes,” minjeong notes your expectant look and adds on, “we’re discussing a potential partnership. he has a branch in china and we were considering expanding there.”

your genuine interest catches her off guard, “oh yeah! zhanghao! we have mutual friends.” minjeong hums. maybe your mutual friendship could help her company.

“interesting.”

you finish up your last piece of toast, letting out a pleased sigh. minjeong chuckles but the moment is disrupted by a notification ringing from her phone.

as she’s reading, her eyebrows furrow again. you withstand from smoothening them out.

“what’s up?”

minjeong groans, “stupid aeri wants me to go get dog food for her pets. cooper and lily are apparently protesting against the new kibble she bought for them.”

your eyes light up.

“do you want to go get it together? i wanna visit cooper and lily too,” you hastily inject, scared that minjeong would sense your excitement on spending one-on-one time with her.

“sure, whatever. i can’t believe she’s is too lazy to get it herself.”

you giggle, “gigi’s probably just hanging out with somi or ning.”

minjeong bites the inside of her cheek hearing you call her friends using nicknames. it makes her stomach twist uncomfortably. you only knew aeri and yizhuo after meeting them at the engagement party, one that minjeong was unaware of. she had arrived home after a long day at work and right smack in the living room was a three-tier cake with balloons surrounding it. her friends had sprayed her with confetti and startled by the noise, you had rushed down from your room, thinking someone had broken in with the way minjeong was yelling.

it would have been funny if minjeong wasn’t the victim of a near heart attack. but after that, you had so easily started conversing with her friends, blending into their group seamlessly. maybe she was jealous of the way you managed to befriend people so easily while it took her a long time to open up to somebody. or maybe she was jealous that you were talking to them instead of her with that pretty smile of yours—

“right,” she mutters. unaware of minjeong’s inner turmoil, you beam brightly at her, “let’s go now if you’re ready?”

“yes, i’m ready. let’s head out now.” minjeong should rid herself of these weird thoughts.

you smile again. minjeong’s heart nearly stops. perhaps she’s going crazy.

“are you driving? or is mr lee driving us?” you ask as you put on your shoes. minjeong twirls the car keys in her hand, showing it off to you.

“you’ve never driven me before, are you sure i’m safe?” you tease. minjeong’s face turns a sheen of light pink, you think it’s adorable.

“i’m an excellent driver,” she states. you nudge her in the ribs as she walks to the garage.

she squirms cutely away from your attacks. you can conclude that your wife is ticklish.

or maybe everything she does is suddenly cute to you.

“how long is it going to take?” you ask while entering the car.

“around ten minutes, not long,” minjeong starts the engine, turning to you with a look of frustration.

next, she does something completely unimaginable.

reaching over your lap, she pulls the seatbelt down, fastening it for you. your cheeks instantly turn a bright red at her close proximity. you can almost feel her warmth, so unlike the coldness she exudes. it makes your heart flutter.

“do you normally not fasten your seatbelt? it’s dangerous,” she states, disapproval written on her face.

“i forgot about it,” you scoff, “but where did you learn how to flirt like that?”

minjeong temporarily pauses, eyes enlarged, “flirt?”

“you made my heart race,” you sigh, “c’mon, reaching over me to help me put on my seatbelt? that’s a k-drama move.”

your wife turns crimson. her icy exterior finally melts away.

“i— that wasn’t on purpose!” she splutters, turning back to focus on driving. if she doesn’t stop reacting so cutely, you might never stop teasing her.

you understand now why jimin had said she liked teasing minjeong for her reaction.

meanwhile, minjeong tries to calm herself down. she wasn’t flirting right? she was just trying to look out for your safety! if something happens, she wouldn’t want to take the blame for it.

maybe her heart did race when she leaned over you, but anyone’s heart would do the same! close proximity of another person always made her nervous.

noting minjeong’s pink cheeks, you decide to give her a break and instead start shuffling the songs in her playlist. humming to them throughout the ride, it makes the drive duration considerably shorter as minutes after, minjeong parks the car.

“we’re here,” she announces. after getting out of the car, you stare at minjeong, wondering when you got so bold with your teasing. normally, you would never dare to do this to her, scared of her reaction. but with the morning’s conversation and her changed personality, you were no longer afraid of her cold and aloof words.

“is this the brand aeri wants?” minjeong asks, pointing to a large bag of kibble seated on the shelf. you try to recall.

“i think so, she mentioned it before.”

minjeong nods. you try to pull it off the shelf, but the sheer size of it makes you tumble. warm, large hands immediately reach out to steady you, holding your body with care that you’ve never felt in your life.

“a-ah…”

your wife retracts her hands, but instead of putting them at her side, she places them on your shoulders, “are you okay?”

unable to say words without your voice shaking, you settle for a nod. minjeong removes her hands and takes the bag from you.

“be careful next time. let me carry the heavy things.”

you only follow her like a puppy. aeri better appreciate the kibble after all the heart attacks you’ve been through. first fastening your seatbelt, then doing this? was minjeong some sort of play girl that knew how to play with people’s feelings?

“—hey,” she flicks your forehead, “are you listening to me?” you stumble back at the impact, wincing from the pain. pouting, you ask, “what were you saying?”

“i was asking you if you knew what to wear on sunday.”

“oh, i haven’t decided yet.” minjeong takes her card out to pay. as you wonder about your outfit, the cashier swiftly bags the kibble and bows, “thank you! and you two make a cute couple.”

your eyes turn as large as saucers. minjeong stops, but sends a timid smile, “thank you.”

she carries the bag in one hand and grabs you with the other, leading you out of the store. if it weren’t for the interaction between minjeong and the cashier, you would applaud your wife’s strength.

“what was that?” you blurt out as you settle into the car.

“hm? are we not a cute couple?”

you can’t deny that.

minjeong laughs, a heavenly sound that you would cherish for the rest of your life.

your wife was a mystery, you admit. maybe you would be the one to solve her.

between the impromptu errand and the sunday dinner, your bond with minjeong had considerably become closer. slowly but surely, she was no longer stiff and reserved but rather… silly. her actions were strange and eccentric but in an endearing way. you couldn’t help but find her cute. with a stronger friendship, you learnt many things about your wife. apparently she was allergic to tomatoes, which is a fact you stored in your memory in case you cooked for her.

she also liked harry styles a lot. you feel rather envious the way her eyes light up and her smile stretches whenever she hears his music. her family is from busan and sometimes when she calls her mother, you hear hints of her busan accent slip out. minjeong had revealed that she slowly weakened her accent when talking to people in seoul, scared they wouldn’t understand her. after you complimented how attractive and sweet it sounded, minjeong started using it more.

you had also moved into minjeong’s room. after falling asleep in her bed countless times watching dramas, minjeong had just moved your clothes in hers. it was comforting having a warm body to cuddle up to. minjeong didn’t seem to mind anyway.

“winter,” you call out, “does this look nice?” another new development. normally, when you two used to go for family dinners and meetings, you would just put on any other dress and call it a day. but now, ever since winter had made an offhand comment about matching clothes, you decided to call for her opinion. minjeong was forced to sit on the bed and wait for you. as you twirl out of the walk-in closet, minjeong gapes.

“that looks,” minjeong gulps, “great.” you turn to her, grinning, “you look good too.” she stands up and fixes stray strands of your hair.

“you smell nice,” you remark, taking in minjeong’s scent. it was all over her. from the crook of her neck to her fingertips.

“it’s jo malone, jimin unnie recommended it to me.”

you perk up, “blackberry and bay, right? she told me to buy it too.”

minjeong scratches her nape, “i was just trying something new today.” you adore her timid and shy personality. behind all that coldness was just a soft and bashful girl.

she leads you to the car, opening it and greeting the chauffeur inside. you adjust the strap of your black dress. minjeong notices and helps you, leaving lingering hot touches on your shoulders.

the warmth of her hands makes blood rush up to your neck. you silently pray minjeong doesn’t notice the redness residing there.

“mrs kim, we have arrived,” the chauffeur says. minjeong opens the car door, assisting you in getting out. you enjoy the feel of her hand in yours.

“woah,” you gasp at the size of the hotel. minjeong groans, “i hope he hasn’t booked a room here for us.”

you smile, cheekily poking her in the ribs, “it would be fun staying here alone.”

“sure,” she snorts as you enter the hotel, beelining to the restaurant. the waitress at the front leads you two into a private room near the back and minjeong internally groans at how her father stares at your intertwined hands.

you take a seat, pulling minjeong to sit down beside you.

“you’ve finally warmed up, haven’t you?” minjeong’s father whispers.

she remains silent, unwilling to admit that somehow, you have managed to gnaw at the walls surrounding her heart, capturing it for yourself to keep. and somehow, it is so unlike her, that she wants you to keep it.

“how has marriage been treating you?” your mother asks.

you answer, “winter is really sweet to me. it’s nice being married.”

“winter?” your wife’s mother repeats. she turns to minjeong, aghast, “you do not let her call you ‘minjeong’?”

your wife, equally alarmed, instantly denies it, “of course not. we just aren’t used to calling each other’s names so casually.”

“but you are married.”

you mentally curse yourself for forgetting about how you still don’t call minjeong by her birth name.

“you mean to say that you aren’t close enough to drop the honorifics?” her father asks. minjeong repeatedly shakes her head.

“we are close, we just haven’t called each other by our names yet.” at this point, minjeong is digging your graves.

“no pet names either? back when your mother and i were first married, we had all sorts of names for each other! like ‘honeyboo’, ‘sweetheart’—”

you interrupt loudly, “okay, dad! we get it!”

minjeong’s hand slithers back into yours, gripping onto it for comfort.

“we’ll sort all these out later, but can we just eat first please? i’m starving.” your parents compose themselves while minjeong’s father glares at her.

your wife lets out a relieved sigh after they stop interrogating you.

“i’m sorry about that,” you mutter to her.

she looks at you, eyes gleaming with something akin to affection from below her long eyelashes, “it’s okay. we should have dropped the formalities long ago.”

“right,” you test it out, “minjeong.”

her eyes crinkle.

minjeong’s father eyes you weirdly.

“so,” he starts out, smirking, “you are finally attached to her?” minjeong groans. you had left to go to the washroom and her father decided to start questioning her.

“i realised that you are right.” no matter how shameful it is to admit, minjeong’s father was right. “i do like her.”

he grins proudly.

“have you told her?”

minjeong shakes her head. it’s ironic, the fact that you are married yet haven’t even confessed your affection to one another. it’s like you’re doing everything backwards.

“that’s fine, i booked a hotel room here specifically since i knew you would admit it,” he hands her the keycard. she nods.

your parents smile softly at minjeong. she feels a rush of affection at the familiar faces.

“thank you for treating our daughter well. she seems happy.”

“of course,” minjeong whispers.

the door swings open, you take your seat beside minjeong. she flashes you a grin, shaking the keycard in hand. you remember what she said about her father booking a room. laughter bubbles out of your throat.

“i think we’re done here for the night,” minjeong’s father says, “thank you for joining us tonight. let’s meet again soon.”

slowly, the group disperses, leaving you with just minjeong at the hotel lobby.

“shall we go up?”

the room is stunning to say the least. at the top of the building, it hosts a wonderful view of the city skyline. it’s even more gorgeous with kim minjeong standing in the centre of it. you didn’t get to tell her before but she looks absolutely jaw-dropping in a lavish, thin-strapped, dress. her brown hair complementing the white dress. it cinched at her waist, highlighting it, tempting you to wrap your arms around it.

“it’s beautiful,” minjeong exclaims, leaning over the balcony railings to gaze at the view. you slowly inch towards her.

“you’re more beautiful.”

even facing away, you catch sight of her rosy cheeks. it’s simply adorable.

“stop teasing me,” she whines.

“what?” you laugh, “i didn’t get to tell you properly but you really are the most gorgeous girl ever. i nearly fainted when i saw you.”

“me too,” she mumbles. you barely hear her. finally giving into the temptation, you sneak your hands around her waist, pulling her body flush into yours.

her soft gasp makes your head dizzy.

“y/n,” she whispers, making goosebumps rise up on your skin. you’re still not used to her calling your name.

“yes, minjeong?”

she spins around, hands grabbing at your shoulders for support. it sends shivers down your spine.

“i think,” she noses at your cheek affectionately, “i could get used to this married thing.”

“yeah?”

she hums.

you reach for her jaw, caressing it softly.

“you’re too cute, mindoongie. ah, i really like you. what should i do, hm?”

minjeong giggles.

“i really like you too.”

“mindoongie, my ice princess,” you sigh, leaning your forehead onto hers, “you’re just a softie after all.”

“only for you, y/nnie.”

you conclude your experiment. minjeong is indeed soft everywhere. her lips, as light as a feather, sends tingles throughout your body. unintentionally, your lips part for minjeong to slowly slip her tongue into your mouth. it feels like it’s meant to be the way your lips mould perfectly into each other. hands grasping for any more warmth minjeong could provide, you only pull her in even closer, savouring her taste.

every nip, every suck, it lights a fire of desire and affection in you. if being married to minjeong meant that you could do this every day, every hour, every second, it would be a dream come true.

eventually, you feel minjeong smile through the kiss and she pulls away, gasping to catch her breath.

“wow,” you say, eyes wide and chest heaving. minjeong’s no better. she guffaws and drops her head onto your shoulder.

“shut up.”

“who knew mindoongie was such a casanova? hey, let’s do that again.”

your wife turns away, cheeks blazing.

“i like you so much, y/n.”

you sigh, relishing in the after effects of minjeong herself. being married wasn’t so bad after all.

“i really like you too, minjeong.”

[shadowandlightt]

Of Nightmares and Memories | nine | Azirel X reader

Series Warnings: Kidnapping. Mistreatment. Cursing. Pining. Violence. Depression. Talks of suicide. Eventual smut

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven Part Eight

A/N; *to the tune of Britney Spears* OOps I DID IT AGAIN. Also I'm more nervous about this part than I have been for this entire series, so be nice and kind and I hope you enjoy <3

Mor showed up a few days later. She appeared as you were lounging in a chair, attempting to read some random romance novel you’d come across. 

“He’s taking her to The Weaver,” She stated in lue of a greeting. 

“Well then he’s a fool,” You snorted, not looking up from your book. 

“YN,” She warns, “He’s taking her to The Weaver.” 

“Yes I heard you,” you roll your eyes and look up, “What difference does it-” 

You stop upon seeing the look on her face. The worry and the pain hidden there. You swallow the lump in your throat at the sight. She looked at you like you would break at any moment, and maybe you would. Maybe she saw the truth in you. 

“They’re mates, aren’t they?” You question, voice sounding strange. 

She only nods and moves to sit on the couch across from you. You nod slowly in understanding. You wanted to be happy for them, but somehow you couldn’t feel it. Like there was something wrong with you. Like you were broken. 

“I had a feeling,” You tell her, “From the moment she became Fae and he came for her the first time. I had a feeling.”

It was true, you did have a feeling. Something deep within you told you that they were drawn to one another in ways that neither of them could explain. You often wondered if that was the same with Azirel too. If you were secretly mates, you used to pray for it as a child. Because you couldn’t imagine a better mate than him 

To this day you still couldn’t imagine a better mate. But how could he want you now? Mate or not. You’d never have the same relationship that you had before. Nothing would be the same. How could you pretend to be the same person you were when you were taken when everything around you was different? You weren’t sure how you were going to do any of this. 

“Please come home,” Mor begged. 

“I can’t,” You try to keep your voice from breaking, “I can’t go back there.” 

“Why?” She demands, standing from the couch, “Why are you denying yourself this? It’s Valaris! Your favorite place in all the world! You hate being here, you always have.” 

“Maybe I deserve to be here,” You mumble, “Maybe I deserve to be away from all of you.”

“What are you talking about?” She questions. 

“I didn’t try to run when I could have. I gave up. I fucking gave up and accepted my fate there,” You explain, slamming your book shut, “I let myself become Tamlin’s little play thing, I allowed him to strip my powers away. I let him do everything to me and I never fought back.” 

“You never deserved what happened to you,” She shook her head, “I’m not so sure that I wouldn’t have given up either, if I’d been in your shoes.” 

“I spent fifty years thinking all of you were dead.”

“Oh, Y/N.”

“I really did give up then. Because I realized Rhys wouldn’t be able to come for me. Up until that point, up until she took him, I was convinced he would come save me. That all of you would somehow find out I was still alive and come marching into the Spring Court and raze it to the ground.” 

You shake your head, trying to clear the thoughts that were swirling about. Your back ached along the two big scars. Everything about you just hurt. Your skin, your head, your chest, your heart…everything. You just wanted it to stop. You needed it to stop. 

Mor sat back down and reached over to take your hands in hers. There was nothing but love in her eyes, no sign of the pain that you saw when she first arrived. You want to pull away from her, pull away from the tender touch that reminded you too much of your mother. 

“You survived,” She swore, looking deeply into your eyes, “You made it out. You were brave and cunning and you survived. That’s all that matters now.” 

Your head shakes again, “No, it’s not all that matters. You can’t understand, none of you can.”

“Then help me understand,” She begs, “Help me understand what’s going on. Help me help you.” 

“You can’t help me, Morrigan,” You said, standing up and ripping your hands away from hers. 

You walked to one of the large widows, wondering how bad it would be if you flung yourself from the Palace. How much would it hurt when you crashed into the mountain below? Would it be enough to bring you the release you so desperately craved? Would Mor be able to stop you in time? 

You thought long and hard about it, but in the end you turned away from the window. Hating yourself for even thinking such a thing. It would destroy Rhys to get you back only to lose you again. You couldn’t do that to him. That was the only thing stopping you. 

“Azriel knows we’re hiding something,” She says from her spot on the couch, “I’m not sure how much longer we can hold him off.” 

You nearly cringe at the sound of his name. Cauldron, what is he going to do when he finds out about you? How will he react? Will he even want to be in the same room as you? Will he be able to stand to look at you after everything you’ve done? 

“I don’t care,” You lied, “I don’t give a fuck if he thinks you’re hiding something. You don’t tell him about me.”

“Yes I know, Rhys’ order was very clear,” She rolls her eyes. 

“You should go,” You tell her, “Before they wonder where you are.”

She sighs and gets up from the couch. You can tell she wants to say something else but decides against it. You watch as she disappears into darkness. You finally felt that you were able to breathe once she left. 

You fell deeper and deeper into the darkness as the days went on. The feeling in your chest only got worse with time. You wondered what would happen if you went down to The Hewen City. What would they do if their princess suddenly reappeared after so many years. 

You wondered if they’d kill you, just to spite Rhys. Or if they’d bow down to you like they used to. But then you remembered one of the last conversations you had with Azriel, and how he hated the way so many of the males talked about you and you felt sick. 

Everything surrounding Az seemed to make you feel that way these days. You could feel it deep in your chest, the sort of ache you always seemed to feel whenever you were away from him. After all of these years it still hadn’t subsided. In fact it seemed to be getting worse as each day passed by. Like being back in the Night Court and being so close to him was making it worse. Or maybe it was the fact that the Faebane was finally starting to wear off and your powers were coming back. 

No matter the reason, you weren’t sure that you could go on like this any more. You didn’t know how you could live with the constant ache forever. Because you never planned on going back to Valaris, you couldn’t face the city you loved after what you did. After how you allowed your mother to be killed. She loved Valaris, and loved flying over the city. And it was your fault she was dead, no matter what anyone else said. You were to blame. 

You didn’t expect Rhys to appear several days later. He looked tired. You wanted nothing more than to wrap your arms around him and tell him that it was going to be okay. But even you didn’t believe that. You couldn’t believe that it would be okay. Too much had happened. 

“We’re going to the Summer Court,” He tells you, “Feyre, Amren, and myself.”

“Enjoy.”

“Little Star, tell me what to do,” He begs, stepping closer to you, “Tell me how to help you.”

“I’ll tell you like I told Mor,” You sigh, “You can’t help me.”

“Come back to Valaris, be with your family.” 

Your head shakes. You couldn’t bear to face Cassian and Azriel. Not now, maybe not ever. It’s something Rhys could never understand. He was able to readjust easily after Amerantha. But he hadn’t spent hundreds of years being beaten and mistreated. He wasn’t starved and drugged every day. You couldn't be mad at him, as much as you wanted to be. Because you knew he suffered too. 

“I can’t come back.”

“You keep saying that but you never say why,” he challenged. 

“Because it’s all my fault!” you finally broke, tears streaming down your face, “It’s my fault, Rhysand. She could still be alive if I had just done something. Anything. But I didn’t.”

“If you’re to blame, then so am I,” He countered, “It should be just as much my fault. I told Tamlin where you would be. I’m the one who didn’t come to meet you as I promised, I left you undefended.” 

“It’s not your fault, Rhys,” You felt anger boiling up in you now. 

Because you didn’t blame him. You never did. He had duties to attend to that day, you understood that he couldn’t get away. He trusted Tamlin. The son of spring had him fooled, and that was not Rhys’ fault. Not in the slightest. 

“Then it isn’t your fault either,” He gently argued. 

You can’t help but shake your head again. He didn’t understand. He couldn’t understand. He wasn’t there. He didn’t hear her. He doesn’t see her every time he closes his eyes, he doesn't hear her screams in his nightmares. 

“You don’t understand,” You cried, “She didn’t even beg for herself. Even as they cleaved her wings from her body, she only begged for my life. Begged for them to set me free. Even as they hacked her to pieces, she cried for me.” 

“Y/N-”

“I’ll live with that knowledge forever,” You sob, “Do you have any idea what that’s like? To know that you failed your mother? That she died for nothing, because you are nothing?”

“Don’t say that.”

“Why? It’s true. I have nothing left to give,” You shrug, fighting back the tears, “There’s nothing left for me.”

He surges forward and grabs your shoulders, “Don’t say that. Don’t you even think about it. Never think about something like that. There is so much left for you in this life.”

“It doesn’t feel that way, Rhys,” You feel numb all of the sudden. 

The void is back. And you’re once again a shell of yourself with no fight left to give. You sag against Rhys’ hold on you, wishing you could just crawl back into your bed and forget that this conversation ever happened. 

You wish he would just leave already so you could just disappear within yourself again. You wished he would just leave you alone to waste away. It seemed to be the only thing you could think of doing these days. 

He looks into your eyes and goes silent for a moment. You know the look he has, he’s speaking to someone, mind to mind. You feel anxiety well up within you, because you have no idea who he’s speaking with and what he’s telling them. 

You can only hope that it’s Morrigan and nothing else. You can only hope that he’s trying to ascertain how serious you are about having nothing left. But then shadows ripple in the room, subtly at first, but enough that you realize it. And it’s not you calling to them 

“You promised me,” You cry, hitting his chest, “You fucking promised.” 

“I won’t let you wither away to nothing,” He says sternly, “Not when there’s someone who can stop it.”

The shadows take form. You rip yourself from Rhys’ grasp and try to run but you hardly make it out of the room before the man is then flesh. You know the second he’s here, because you can feel it in your very bones.  Like a song in your blood. You try to keep moving but your body betrays you and stops. You think that maybe he won’t take notice of you. Maybe he’ll be too focused on Rhys. But then you hear footsteps. So hesitant, so light you hardly hear them. 

You can hear your heartbeat in your ears, or maybe it’s his. You think you might drop dead here. Right in front of both of them, and then where would they be? Your hands are shaking, just like the rest of your body. But you keep your back towards him, too afraid to turn around. 

A hand reaches for your shoulder. His touch is featherlight, but you can feel his scars through the thin material of your shirt. You knew it was him, long before he touched you. You could smell him better now though. Could feel that void in your chest slowly starting to fill. 

As if his very presence was enough to bring you back to life. 

Hesitantly, he speaks. Voice so silky and deep, just as you remembered it in your dreams. Only now it’s a dream made real, and he’s here. You’re alive and he’s alive and suddenly he’s gently spinning you around to face him. 

There are tears in his eyes as he opens his mouth, “Y/N.”

It’s the only thing you hear as he studies your face. Your lip trembles as tears fall anew. You can feel the air filling your chest, nothing but the scent of him filing your nose. For the first time in years you want to smile, because he’s here. And more devastatingly beautiful than you remembered him being. 

“Az,” you cry out softly. 

He pulls you into his chest, holding you there tightly. For the first time in a couple of hundred years, you felt complete. You nuzzle into him, still crying, getting his leathers wet with your tears. You couldn’t bring yourself to care though, because it just felt right. You could feel it deep within your chest, the part of you that always seemed to connect you to him. 

“You’re alive,” You can hear the disbelief in his voice, and the wonder too.

“You’re alive,” You cry, finally allowing the words to sink in. 

He was alive, after all of these years. He was untouched during Amarantha’s rule. Valaris was untouched. Everyone that you loved was okay, and so were you. Somehow, for the male holding you and your brother, you would fight to be okay. 

He pulls away from you and cups your face. You watch as he looks you over, carefully scanning your body. Any of the lingering bruises from Tamlin had faded away into nothing. There was nothing to prove that anything happened at all besides the two long scars on your back. 

“Y/N,” He whispers again, “Oh my Y/N.” 

Then he leaned in to kiss you and it was as if your whole world shifted to just him. He was the only thing that mattered. Just Azirel. Always only Azriel. Your Azriel. Your perfect, beautiful, scarred Azriel.

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[imyourbratzdoll]

Hey I was reading your X-men posts and I just had an idea and if it is possible for you can you write about reader was with Bucky or Steve or both (your choice) but they break her heart and she finds love again with Charles Xavier (James McAvoy) or Eric Lehnsherr (Michael Fassbender) or both (again your choice) and protect her from Steve/Bucky 😅❤️

hi honey! thank you for requesting this, I hope you like what I've written!

summary - love can be deceiving especially with the wrong person, but it's so much more when it's with the right person.

warning - cheating? angst, word whore is used, insecurities, small violence.

the gif I use isn't mine, divider by @newlips (deactivated)

Bucky Barnes had been your light since the day The Avengers found you. He had been the one to comfort you when the nightmares would become too much, the one to love you like you’ve never been loved before. So why did it feel like your heart was being ripped out of your chest as you heard him talking to his friends. Why did it feel like the opposite of love?

“I’m so sick of Y/n being attached to me all of the time! And does she really think I love her?! Has she seen herself lately? She’s no Nat or Sharon. She’s just her, plain.” Bucky groans, rolling his eyes and taking a sip of his beer. “Oh, did I tell you that I hooked up with a smoking hot babe last night?” He smirks. “Man could she bend.”

You suck in a breath quietly, not wanting to be heard and also struggling to hold back your pain. You walk back to your room, quickly packing your things and disappearing into the night. You knew it was too good to be true, not once in your life had anything ever turned out good. You always seemed to end up with the short end of the stick. You had nowhere to go, a bag in your hand and the moon shining down on you. You felt stupid, you should’ve stayed, found a place before you left. 

You decided to walk a few blocks, taking a random train, wanting to distance yourself. You had turned your phone off and threw it away at the first sight of Bucky calling you. You couldn’t turn back now, too busy with your head down, looking at the ground you manage to bump into someone. Your bag falling from your hands, hitting the floor with a thump. “I–I’m so sorry!” You go to kneel but stop when you notice your bag floating in the air. 

“It’s not safe for a pretty girl to be out this late. You don’t know who you might end up bumping into.” You blink, your eyes connecting with blue. The random man hums, “Ah, Y/n L/n. What are you doing so far from home? Don’t you know you have many people looking for you? Some good, some bad.” 

You shrug, “I don’t care…” You wipe your cheeks, ensuring there are no tear marks on them. “Who are you?” 

The unknown man stares, face like stone. Reminding you so much of the man you just left. “And here I thought I made a reputation for myself.” He studies you, “Erik Lehnsherr, but I also go by Magneto.” 

You nod. “It’s nice to meet you. If you excuse me, I have somewhere to be…” You lie, you recognise the name, you knew of the people he used to hang around before he fully embraced his dark side. You couldn’t have him handing you back out of spite, you didn’t want to go back. Not after what you heard. 

Erik’s hand flies out, gripping your arm softly. “No, you don’t. But I’m not a total monster, I won’t let a pretty girl like you stay out on the streets all night. God knows what will happen.” He begins to pull you along, ignoring your protests. “Be quiet, don’t make me regret being kind.” 

Your mouth falls open as you stand in front of the X-Mansion, beginning to feel uncomfortable as you realise these people may judge you. You weren’t a mutant, you were a freak, an unloved freak. “I–I can’t stay here!”

“Why not?” Erik looks down at you, “Oh, are you one of those vampires that need inviting in?”

You look up at him with your head tilted, “Huh? What… No. I just, these people are… and I’m me… Plain…” You begin to play with your fingers.

“Hmm, whoever said that should get their eyes checked. Now come. I’m sure Charles is awaiting our arrival.” Instead of dragging you by the arm, he moves his hand and opens it, waiting for you to slip yours into his. 

Months had passed since you had bumped into Erik, Charles had accepted you into their family, proving to you that you were one of them. Erik had come and gone many of times since he had taken you here, and each time you began to dread when he had to leave again. Your relationship with him was okay, it had begun quite stiff and slowly blossomed into a friendship, the only issue is you fell for him. But you knew you weren’t good enough for a man like Erik, Bucky had proved that. 

Today you were excited though, Erik was coming back, and you had decided to wear your favourite dress, remembering the first time you had worn it, and he couldn’t stop staring at it. Deep down your insecurities were saying it’s because he hated the dress and was wondering how someone like you could ruin a pretty piece of clothing by wearing it, but another part of you had hoped it was the opposite, that he liked your dress.

You walk out of your room, smoothing out your dress as you begin to head to the door where you hear voices. A smile forms on your face, ready to see Erik again. You enter the room and your smile falls, he had finally found you. You didn’t want to face him, he was the reason you didn’t think you were good enough anymore. 

‘Y/n, I don’t want you to think I invited him, I tried to stop him, but I cannot do much unless I control someone’s mind and you understand why I didn’t, right?’ Charles speaks into your mind, your eyes connect with his and you nod.

“This is where you’ve been this whole time?! Do you know how worried we were?! How could you be so stupid!!” Bucky growls, moving closer. It’s as though you up and leaving him had struck a nerve, but you don’t know why, he didn’t love you like you did him. 

You hated yourself in this moment, you wanted to stand up for yourself and show him that his words didn’t hurt, but everything was coming back, and you couldn’t move or speak. “I–I…” 

“Take one step closer to her and I’ll shove that arm of yours down your throat.” A voice speaks from behind you, Erik steps out from the shadows, moving closer to you. His hand rests on your lower back, calming you down when you didn’t even know you needed to be calm. 

Bucky spins his arm, glaring. “Who are you?” His eyes fall to where Erik’s hand rests before he looks at you. “Is this why you ran off? Because you’re a whore?” Bucky steps forward, ignoring Erik’s warning causing Bucky to let out a cry of pain as his arm begins to get crushed.

“I warned you to not step closer to her. Yet you ignored that and insulted her.” He moves in front of you, pulling you to stay behind him. “Charles may have not wanted to control your mind because he’s a good guy, but I’m not.” With a flick of his hand, Bucky rises and gets thrown through the door. Erik stalks forward and glares at him. “If you ever come near Y/n again, I will kill you.” He makes sure to watch Bucky leave before he turns and walks toward you before you can even open your mouth to thank him, he grips the sides of your face and pulls you in, bringing you into a passionate kiss. 

Was this what love felt like?

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

[stargirl-int3rlud3]

𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐈𝐧 𝐏𝐢𝐧𝐤.

straw hat crew x fem! reader

🗯 ! swearing, flirting, slight suggestive language !

synopsis; how i interpret opla characters would react to having a hyper feminine lover. — ♡ ᵎᵎ

LUFFY; Personally, Luffy doesn't really care too much what you wear. He thinks you look great in whatever you choose to wear. However, he is your biggest supporter and hype man. Constant compliments left and right about how gorgeous you are and how he's so lucky to have you. Luffy would definitely be one to treat you like a princess. I'm talking carries you around in his arms and puts a jacket done on wet puddles. He highly believes in chivalry and is the biggest gentleman.

You had just recently gotten a new, cute, pink skirt and today was the day you planned on wearing it. When you walk out of Luffy's cabin in the new clothing piece his eyes suddenly fall upon you. "Woah!! Is that new?" Luffy approaches you staring at the piece. "It is, you like?" You ask, spinning for Luffy, so that he gets a full view of the skirt. "Like it? I love it!!" He exclaims, lightly placing his hands on your hips to feel the texture of the skirt. Not too long after, Luffy is running left and right carrying you around in his arms. Some low-life, pirate was trying to attack Luffy and now here you were, tightly nestled against his chest as he tried his very hardest not to let a single stain of mud or any other substance onto your pretty little skirt that he now deemed one of his favorites.

ZORO; He LOVES him some hyper feminine girlies (and hyper feminine girlies love him). The constant slaps to your ass prove just how much he loves the way you dress. He loves admiring how great you look and the jealous looks he gets when men walk by you to see that such a pretty girl is situated on his lap. It boosts his confidence which can be both and good and bad thing. I like to think that Zoro is quite the possessive man and doesn't like sharing, which is why he feeds into your pink obsession. He loves watching your doe eyes beg for him to buy you a new cute pink outfit, he always seems to cave in.

You stare at Zoro through your beautiful lashes with a sweet, sincere smile on your face. Zoro caresses your face sweetly, before moving your head to the side to place even sweeter kisses along your neck until his lips brush up against your. "..I suppose you can get it, since you want it so badly"He smirks at you, staring deep into your doll-like eyes. You wrap your arms around Zoro's neck, "Eeeek!! Thank you so much Zoro, you're the bestest boyfriend ever!!" He watches as you race to the cash register with loving eyes. After shopping, Zoro convinced you to let him take you out for a nice dinner. Now that you're here you think part of it was because Zoro wanted to flaunt you off to anyone that would dare look your way. His smirk got wider and wider by the hour as men would make their way towards you just to quickly turn around at the sight of you so nicely sat in Zoro's lap. While you did find it cute that he wanted to flaunt you to the world you also found his overconfidence to be slightly...annoying at times as he would talk about a random guy's face drop rapidly at the sight of Zoro.

NAMI; Similarly to Luffy, she doesn't really care what you wear as long as you're comfy in what you're wearing. That doesn't mean she dislikes the way pink fits you so well. Nami could never really see herself wearing pink, so to see her lover wearing it so beautifully, she's awestruck to say the least. Due to Nami's sarcastic nature, she constantly is making princess jokes to you.

"Hey Princess, you need help getting down" Nami jokes as you're about to step off the ship. You roll your eyes playfully, following along, "Why yes I would, my knight" She smiles at you before laughs bubble from her throat and out of her perfect lips. You reach your hand out towards her, grazing your hand over her lips. She notices quickly, arching one of her eyebrows at the gesture. Retreating your hand back, you turn away from her with a slight pink across your face. Suddenly, you're dipped and met with a smirking Nami who delicately places her lips upon yours. Your palms meet her face as you pull her even closer than before. " Hey lovebirds, let's get our asses moving!" Zoro scolds you two with a slight look of disgust which leaves you and Nami giggling. "Sorry, Zoro, my princess needed her knight" She jokes nudging you softly.

SANJI; This man loves any woman who will give him the light of day. So the fact that you, a pretty hyper feminine girl, chose HIM. Oh, he fantasizes and daydreams about you like a schoolgirl with a crush. When you show off a new outfit to him, he is all ears and eyes and will tell you how every piece fits together so well to create a masterpiece fit so perfectly for you. I can see Sanji adding natural pink food coloring to your foods just to watch your face light up at the sight of it. Seeing you in cute pink crop tops and skirts as well as many other categories of clothing, makes Sanji want to get on his knees for you (not in that way- okay, maybe a little bit in that way). He is such a simp at heart and will do anything for you.

"Sanji? How is this outfit for lunch?" You ask posing for the blonde man who admired you greatly. "Anything you wear is utmost stunning as it is already being worn by a masterpiece" He explains his reasoning to you with a cute smile that you adore. You skip your way over to Sanji as he leads you to the dining area by your hand that is intertwined with his. He sweetly pushes you into your chair once you've sat down. Sanji sits close to you watching for your reaction as you take of the silver covering over your food. When the food is finally on display your eyes sparkle and you emit a sound of joy as you turn to see a lovesick Sanji. You grab his face placing lipgloss stained kisses all over his face and it's like he's in heaven with how lovesick he is. "You gotta bit of something like...all over your face" Nami points out to Sanji as he takes a quick peek in a mirror, only to fall to the floor with his eyes filled with hearts.

USOPP; We already know based off of the whole Kaya thing that this man is a nervous wreck when it comes to women which is surprising because I feel as though he has a quite a list of girls that would date him. Anyways! He, much like Luffy, is your biggest supporter with his constant stuttery compliments. He worships the very ground you walk on (literally), but he's just a bit nervous at times is all. He is also a big simp, but tries to hide it by being "calm and cool".

"Please Nami!!" You beg for the girl to let you decorate her hair. "For the last time, no" Nami told you sternly, leaving you pouting. You just wanted someone to do girly things with sometimes,but Nami never wanted to do the things you wanted to. What you didn't know was that Usopp was currently watch your sad, distressed face as you walk away from Nami. He hurries towards you stopping in front of you with a big grin on his features. You're somewhat startled by your lovers suddenly appearance, "Oh? Hi, Usopp!!" "What are you so sad for?" He asks, examining your face. "Oh...I wanted to do Nami's hair all pretty, but she seems to be annoyed with my asks" You inform the boy of the situation. "You could do mine, if you'd like" Usopp suggests. Your eyes shine brighter than a thousand suns as you jump into Usopp's arms, leaving a red hue on his face. "You would do that for me, Uso?" "Y-yeah, I don't see why not" He rubs his hand on the back of his neck, not being able to look you in the eyes. You kiss his cheek and drag him to your cabin.

☆ | this was SOOOOOO fun to write, i feel like i captured them pretty well :D

[cinnajun]

ᵕ̈ ೫˚∗: zb1 as your boyfriend

a/n: these get progressively longer the more you go on and that’s my bad, i’m just insane over this group idk …

notes: long hair is implied in jiwoong’s, yujin is not included due to his age!, i did not proofread this so sorry for typos

wc | 3.5k

jiwoong

i think this would be so much fun in the like adult way … like doing taxes together and watching tv shows

dating jiwoong means SETTLING DOWN!!! this is for the long run for real

in all seriousness i think being jiwoong’s s/o means you will feel very secure at all times

he isn’t interested in anyone but you … like seriously

looks at you like you’re the only person on the planet when you’re out and about

if anyone hits on him, he shuts it down SO fast that you’ll barely have time to process what happened

in terms of love languages, i’d say his is probably acts of service in both giving and receiving

there’s no better way to show him that you love him than taking care of little chores around the house (especially the ones he usually does) or picking up some toothpaste when he’s running low

in the same way, he loves to do those things for you—he really appreciates the way you smile when you find out he did the dishes for you <;<3

overall, a very sweet relationship, and a very very long-term one

IT’S ALMOST LAUGHABLE how gentle Jiwoong is as he braids your hair, pulling each strand off your head with such precision and cautiousness that you’d think he was braiding strands of pure gold. Weddings were long events, and you’d noticed that, every time you went to one, you ended up with a million knots in your hair that you had to spend extra time brushing out after.

So, Jiwoong had the bright idea to braid your hair—and insisted he do it for you, so that you wouldn’t have to keep your arms raised for so long, or something. You just didn’t think he’d try this hard at it.

“You can go a little faster, you know,” you said, painting your eyelashes with mascara. “If you go any slower, we’ll be late to the ceremony.”

“We can just sit in the back,” he mumbled, continuing to put one strand over the other. “I need to make sure it’s well-done so it doesn’t just knot your hair even worse than leaving it down does.”

You sighed, a little smile appearing on your face. “Whatever makes you happy,” you sighed, continuing to put on your mascara. “Who am I to say no?”

zhang hao

i feel like the most prominent part of dating zhang hao is trying to figure out how you scored him LOL

i mean look at him … he's so perfect it’s almost painful

and he’s such a good boyfriend that literally all of your friends are so jealous … and he’s the only guy they haven’t called ugly so that’s a plus LOL

i will say though dating him has to mean you’re really comfortable with yourself because just about everyone shoots their shot with him

obviously he turns them down but he’s too nice to do it in a way where they’ll actually be scared off (cough jiwoong cough)

he’s very loving and very appreciative, and loves hearing about everything you do

tbh he just loves you

his love language is definitely physical touch, but in the like sweetest way possible

he holds your hand and swings it around when you’re out and about, he leans his head on your shoulder when you watch movies, he puts his head in your lap when you’re sitting on the couch…

and he always stares at you, which is super nerve-wracking, but he just loves you so much that he can’t help it

seriously has heart eyes for you

IT’S NOT ALWAYS that your mom calls, but you supposed today just had to be the day. As much as you love her, she tends to talk your ear off, which is something you’d rather not deal with at a random time in the middle of your day. Nevertheless, it was better to get it over with now rather than later.

Hao had been napping with his head on your lap when she called, and you’d hoped that would be a good excuse to hang up. Except, when you pleaded with your mom, telling her that Hao was sleeping and you didn’t want to wake him, she insisted that she needed to talk to you right then. So, for the past twenty minutes, you’d been listening to her talk about her knitting club while you ran your hand through his hair.

You’d also failed to notice that Hao had been awake since before she’d even called. Initially, he just wanted a few more seconds laying on you before you kicked him off (because your thighs were cramping and you needed to stretch), but he’d been pleasantly surprised when your attention was stolen by the phone call.

So, when you looked down and saw him staring at you oh-so-lovingly, you choked on air, causing your mom to frantically ask you what was wrong. All the while, he stared at you, wondering how he managed to find you (but shouldn’t you be asking that)?

hanbin

if you’re feeling unloved, just date hanbin and he will fix it right up for you

he is an endless pit of love and is just waiting to give it to someone (that someone happens to be you)

you’re like 90% sure he popped out of a cheesy romance novel and wandered straight to your door but i digress

everything about this guy is so pleasant that it’s almost nauseating

his mom, how clean his bedroom is, how much he happens to enjoy cooking, how much he loves all the things you suggest as date ideas, it’s so much that your friends are suspicious that he’s hiding something incredibly unforgivable

he’s not, though, he’s just like that

and he just happened to be truly, madly, deeply in love with you so congrats on that one!!!

hanbin’s love language is also physical touch (shocker)

he’s super clingy, especially when you go out together, and has to have a hand on you at all times (if you get separated it will literally ruin his day)

really loves to cuddle with you…for example, if you decide to take a nap without him, you will wake up wrapped in his impossible to escape koala hug

he also loves kisses. forehead kisses, cheek kisses, all kisses … he especially loves it when you kiss his tattoos

he gets super enamored with you when you give him the same energy back, so try that out, too

EVERY DAY, YOU GET HOME from work around the time Hanbin’s decided to start dinner, and, every day, you attempt the same little prank. Slowly, you enter your home, trying to stay as quiet as possible.

The sound of the nightly news fills your ears, and the smell of whatever Hanbin decided to make attacks your nose. As subtly as possible, you put your bag and keys down on a dresser you have in the entryway, removing your shoes and tiptoeing through the house as quietly as possible.

As usual, Hanbin’s back is facing the doorway, and he’s hunched over the stove, fiddling with whatever he’s making. You tip-toe run up to him, bumping into him and wrapping your arms around his waist. He giggles, as usual, and puts his hands on your arms.

“Hi,” you say into his back, which prompts him to turn around in your embrace, staring down at you with the most loving expression he could muster up.

And, placing a kiss on the crown of your head, he says, “I missed you.”

matthew

CUTE BOYFRIEND!!!

matthew is like so clueless in a relationship and he’s just kind of winging everything, which makes him about 70% funnier

you’ll be out shopping and he’ll pick something up, usually a trinket of sorts, look you dead in the eyes, and say, “is this something people get for their partners?”

if you say yes, it will magically appear in your bedroom like 4 days later and he’ll be oh-so proud of himself

your parents LOVE matthew, to the point where you begin to wonder if they like him more than they like you

it’s nice, though, because they’re more willing to help pay for your utility bill if they know matthew’s benefitting from it too LOL

he’s such a sweet boyfriend that sometimes you like need to stop and put your phone down

his love languages are words of affirmation on the receiving end and gift giving on the giving end

when you’re away from one another, he texts you selfies along with cute little summaries of what he’s doing and absolutely expects you to do the same

also sends good morning/good night texts if he can’t say it in person for whatever reason

also has some like tiktok-worthy beige flags (the comments say they’re all green flags)

like he asks you what your ring size is like once a month and then comes home with ring pops and goes “i had them custom made to fit your finger”

and you’re like “omg matthew i can’t believe you would do that for me!!!”

MATTHEW’S HANDS ARE poorly covering your eyes as he leads you to this mystery-location that he’d spent the entire day hyping up. He swore it was going to absolutely blow you away, and had even said that you’d be at a loss for words.

“We’re almost there,” he said, excitement dripping from his words. “Be careful, there’s a couple of steps here.”

You did your best to ascend without face planting, although it was a bit difficult given that Matthew was unknowingly rushing you due to his excitement. “Okay, are you ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

In a flash, he removed his hands from your eyes, and it takes you a second to realize what you’re staring at. It’s a table cutely decorated for some sort of picnic, with string lights overhead and a candle burning on the table. You realize you’re in your parents backyard pretty quickly, but the thing that really has you confused is the teddy bear sitting on the edge. It looks exactly like the one you carried around as a kid, albeit much cleaner—but you’d lost it when you were 10.

“I tore apart your house looking for it,” Matthew said, putting his head on your shoulder. “Mr. Tumnus, right? Like the Narnia character? He was behind the couch. I got him cleaned, too. Do you like it?”

taerae

swoon

UGHHHH taerae is so perfect

like he’s totally the boy next door, locker neighbor, church boy type of boyfriend

he asked you out on valentine’s day with a bouquet of your favorite flowers and a box of like really pretty chocolate-covered strawberries and you’ve been whipped since

you’re both wrapped around each other’s fingers in the most severe way possible

you’re also definitely like a married couple, specifically a couple of grandparents who’ve been retired for like 30 years

you probably share a friend group, and everyone in the group considers you two the parents of the group (you’re the dad)

almost always, you have a third wheel, but that’s fine because you and taerae are good at making sure it’s not awkward (which is why people always want to come on your dates)

taerae’s love language is definitely quality time

more often than not you’re both doing something completely separate from one another and he doesn’t care, he just likes knowing that you’re around

i don’t see him being the touchiest person, even in a relationship, so spending time together is the only thing taerae needs to feel loved. if you never blow him off and spend all of your free time just sitting next to him, he’ll be entirely pleased forever and ever

SOMETIMES, YOU FORGET that Taerae is in the room with you, which tends to be more embarrassing than you’d have wanted it to be.

Once, early in your relationship, he’d come over and you’d been spending time in your room. Except, hours had passed without you saying a word to each other, and you’d forgotten he was even there in the first place. You were so engrossed in your latest craft project, attempting to crochet, that he’d blended into the scenery of your bedroom.

So, when you kept messing up on a particular stitch, you found it fit to stand up and absolutely scream at the top of your lungs. When you got done, you planned to sit down and keep doing, but you heard Taerae laugh nervously behind you, causing you to freeze up.

“Uh, what was that?”

You turned around, staring at him with what could only be described as horror written on your face. You stared at one another in complete silence for what felt like hours, although in reality it must’ve been no more than five or six seconds.

“I forgot you were here,” you finally choked out, feeling heat rush to your cheeks. Taerae just laughed, and it only made you feel more miserable.

“You’re adorable, you know?”

ricky

ricky is such a sweet boyfriend

even if he’s a bit awkward at times he’s so nice to be around

i think he just cares about you so much that he fluctuates in the same way that you do…if you’re happy, he’s happy, if you’re sad, he’s sad, etc…

at the same, he’s always completely panicked that he is not doing enough for you

he constantly checks in to make sure that you are getting what you need from him, and, while he wouldn’t say it aloud, he appreciates it when you do the same

he doesn’t like conflict so he pretty much does anything he can to get rid of the problem before it happens

as such, if he finds out anything upsetting, he will approach you about it instantaneously

i think ricky’s love language is gift giving, though, both on the receiving end and on the giving end

whether it’s an origami flower made out of a receipt you got or a pretty necklace you found while out and about with friends, ricky treasures it like it’s his child

almost every gift you’ve gotten him is displayed in his room somewhere, like he’s got a whole shelf dedicated to things that you gave him …

all of his gifts are incredibly well thought out too even if they’re last minute

he also tends to just give you anything that you express literally any interest in

you like the hat he’s wearing? okay it’s yours now

“no i mean that i like it on you!!”

he doesn’t care it’s yours now

THANKS TO A FAMILY VACATION, you hadn’t been able to see Ricky for a week, which had been the end of the world for both of you. So, the moment you got back home, you ditched the comfort of your room to head straight to his house.

The moment he opened his front door, you collapsed into his arms, taking in the scent of his cologne mixed with the smell of laundry detergent coming from his sweater. Then, you realized that the sweater he was wearing was new.

You leaned back to get a better look at it, taking it in. “I like it!” you exclaimed, smiling up at him. He tilted his head in confusion, staring back down at you.

“Like what?”

“The new sweater.”

Without even skipping a beat, Ricky tugged it over his head, causing your mouth to drop open a bit. “Wait, no—”

Before you could finish your sentence, he’d pulled it over your head, and was waiting for you to put your arms through the sleeves. He smiled, happy with his sudden attack. “I knew you would, so I got two.”

gyuvin

dating gyuvin is so much fun

you were probably friends before you started dating, so when you start dating, it’s like your friendship amped up 200% along with like some kissing and stuff LOL

he knows you inside and out, to the point where you wonder if he knows you better than you know you

he also definitely had a crush on you for a loooong time before he acted on it so he remembers little details you shared in passing from years in the past

as such he’s constantly taking you out on the most lovely dates you could possibly imagine

you mentioned you like hot chocolate two years ago on a friend group outing? well good news! gyuvin remembered and he’s taking you to a world-renowned cafe that’s specifically noted for its hot chocolate

you like barbie movies???? every single one is downloaded onto his computer. every one. and he knows which one is your favorite

i think gyuvin’s love languages are acts of service + quality time

he just likes doing things for you and he likes doing things with you too … he just likes you tbh

he’d be heartbroken if you ever said no to one of his meticulously planned out dates so make sure to never do that (his friends would also hate you instantly and being hated by sung hanbin AND park gunwook is terrifying so don’t do that)

strangely enough, when you reciprocate the energy and plan out intense dates based on little tiny information, he gets super flustered, so try it out if you can

THE FIRST THING that comes out of Gyuvin’s mouth when he comes into your living room is, “You remembered?”

You’re almost taken aback by the question, eyes widening the moment the words leave his mouth. He was asking you that? After he remembered every little detail about you, from your favorite episode of your favorite show to your favorite breed of dog?

“Of course I remembered that you like soccer. How could I forget that you like soccer?”

You’d set up a little mini-party for the both of you to watch the World Cup, equipped with snacks and a jersey for his favorite team. And, somehow, he was a blushing mess, as if he didn’t expect you to remember something so basic about him.

“I don’t know,” he mumbled, turning away from you as he turned beet red. “I just…I don’t know, I wasn’t expecting it.”

“Well, expect it more often,” you said, linking your arm with his, a bright smile on your face. “Cause I love you. And I love doing things for you.”

gunwook

yea gunwook is definitely your first love and you’re really hoping he’ll be the last

you probably had some sort of super dramatic lead-up to you actually getting into a relationship, so you’re also probably super attached to each other by the first day you’re calling him “boyfriend”

even though he’s young, gunwook feels a lot of responsibility for everything in his life, so being with you is essentially his wind-down time

as a result you have a lot of sleepovers, which include doing facemasks and going to bed at like 9pm because he’s so tired

and you just generally spend a lot of time together because you’re an oasis in the middle of the desert for him

gunwook feels really proud that he gets to have the title of “your boyfriend,” so be prepared for him to call himself that a lot

it makes him all giggly and happy, which makes you all giggly and happy, so you’re pretty much giggly and happy 24/7

gunwook’s love language is absolutely words of affirmation

he’s under a lot of pressure (student council vice president, class president, like good lord he is leading the people) so he just wants to hear that he’s doing well, especially from someone he cares so much about

even just telling him that he’s doing his best will make him melt in a pile of i-love-you putty

and he makes sure to do the same for you :)

IT’S NOT OFTEN THAT Gunwook breaks under the pressure, but when he does, it breaks your heart, too. It’s inevitable that he loses his balance sometimes, given the fact that he often takes on way more than he can handle, but you’re always there to pick up the pieces.

“You need to go to bed,” you say as warmly as possible, placing a hand on his shoulder. He continues to write a flurry of numbers onto his paper, trying to fulfill his plans of finishing all his weekend homework so he could spend the majority of it hanging out with you. “You can finish tomorrow morning, okay?”

Gunwook stops, finally, leaning back in his chair. He looks up at you, a frown on his face, and you can tell that he’s starting to unravel. You cup his face in your hands, looking down at him with the calmest smile you can muster.

“You did a good job, tonight. And calculus will be there for you in the morning, okay?”

“Okay, okay. I’ll stop.”

You smile, a feeling of triumph overtaking you. “Thank you very much!”

thank you for reading!

[suguruplsr]

yuki whose a girl’s girl, but never thought of women romantically until she met you.

hot, with an even hotter attitude, a slightly chubby and sexy body you’re never afraid to show off, and a fucking menace in battle. she almost asked you out the first time she was partnered with you on a mission. was it the jiggle of your thighs with each movement you made, or how you defeated that curse so quickly? even keeping it in line when it made off-handed comments towards you.

her easy going personality made it so easy to flirt you into a nice little date, treating you to dinner afterwards and getting to know you better. her pussy almost throbbed when she learned you never keep a lock on that mouth of yours. giving her doe eyes as you shamelessly eyed her body, licking your lips and telling her how fucking gorgeous she is. she couldn’t help but flaunt her body around you after you made a few comments about how attractive her broad shoulders are, they can cover your whole body, big arms that can pull you in at anytime. and the way she man spreads? if you stare any longer you’ll ask to take your rightful place on her lap.

sometimes she forgets how big she really it, taking up so much space that it just guides you to bask with her, setting your legs over hers because she’s a meanie that doesn’t wanna close her legs on a tiny ass bench. however, you like it when she isn’t trying, aura comfortable as she rants about her thoughts on random things. she’s so cute, expressive with her hands and leaning back n’ forth. but the second she wants to hear words flow from your pretty mouth, she sits back, an arm going around your seat as she looks over at you, messing with your hair, your earrings, or even your necklace. anything that keeps you reminded of her presence.

and fuck

she’s just so sweet, silent and attentive, her eyes drifting from your’s to your glossy plump lips. sometimes, when she really wants to have a conversation with you without distractions, she has to look away so she doesn’t think about how your lips would look around her fingers. she thinks about it more when you two travel overseas together, her bringing you to diners with desserts and watching you get messy, rolling your tongue along the icing of your cupcakes. shit, she just wants to make you gag. especially on the pink strap she has hidden in one of her drawers.

she’ll definitely try it out on you next time she invites you over for a “girls night”

[sesshous]

random dating hcs ᰔ mona, alhaitham, gaming

genre: fluff (no prns)

a/n: dating headcanons... drabbles... blurbs (not rly sure what to call these) also mona in the new cat event!! i love mona, she was the first five star i ever wanted and the first one i ever got, so i'm happy she's at least getting some more screentime haha ♡

mona

mona isn’t the most… responsible with her money. while she does have money set aside, the vast majority of her income goes to her life’s interest: astrology. but even with her lack of money, mona still wants to do things with you! … just without a hefty price tag.

mona loves to stargaze — befitting of an astrologist. she loves taking you around different heights of mondstadt! mona knows all the best spots that have a good view of the night sky — pointing out all the constellations, rambling on to you about what they mean… she’ll even make some copies of her own star charts to give you for future reference.

not really a known fact about her, but mona is actually a pretty decent cook! she'd want to prepare you a filling (and cheap), but very delicious meal rather than go out to eat. sometimes, she’ll end up lecturing you on market prices and ways you can prepare meals for a low cost — she wouldn’t want you buying overpriced ingredients when you can get just as good ones for a cheaper price!

and yes, if you ask her nicely she can create and show you reflections other than constellations with her hydromancy… just for you though. she wouldn’t want people to think her hydromancy is all just for show.

(brownie points if you share the same interest in astrology. you’re basically a match at that point.)

“hm? of course, i knew we were destined to be together — the stars never lie.”

gaming

the absolute sweetest! with how much he talks about you, people of liyue have to be living under a rock if they don’t know the two of you are together.

no has no shame with pda gaming will want to hold your hand everywhere you go. or have his arm around you. or hug you — he literally never gets embarrassed about giving you affection! he’s very into physical touch, he finds it’s comforting. i’d like to think he’s warm to the touch too — with or without the pyro vision. great cuddling material for cold days! (… hot ones too — you just have to wear breathable clothes so you don’t overheat.)

you don’t have to be into it as much as he is, but gaming would definitely want to teach you the basics of wushou dancing! he’s always there to help show and guide you through the movements — he likes to think he’s a pretty good teacher! he'll joke about putting on a duo performance… just a joke of course, haha… unless—?

oh, and man chai loves you! i like to think man chai acts more well behaved for you than he does with gaming, (he blames it on all the treats you give him) but he’s so glad you too get along! … even if man chai does steal take more of your attention when you’re together...

“y’know, i'm starting to think man chai likes you way more than he likes me! … but it's you, so i don’t blame him though, haha!”

alhaitham

alhaitham as quite the reputation for being… unapproachable to say the least. to people, his words and gaze seems judgemental, so how could someone stand to be around someone like that? lucky for you, you're able see past what those people seemingly think of him!

the books alhaitham reads aren’t made for the average’s person leisurely reading — their complex and lengthy — but alhaitham feels a kind of… fondness when you ask him to read out loud whatever book he's currently reading to you! …even if you do end up becoming a bit sleepy due to the content of the book (he thinks it’s cute. will he say that to you? … maybe teasingly.) he also will read and take book suggestions from you if you have any for him! he doesn’t just read non-fiction (and if it’s from you, really he’s open to anything. anything.)

because of alhaitham’s day consisting pretty much on a schedule, he finds himself finding ways to incorporate you into it with his free time. he prefers to spend time with you in more quiet and secluded places around sumeru away from people, but i actually feel like he wouldn’t be opposed to dates in public! going to the likes of places such as the grand bazaar to see what people are selling or watching performances that are put on in the theatre (though most of the time it’s you dragging him out… he does find it entertaining to see your face light up at all of the sights)

on some occasions, he’ll bring you along with him when he’s invited out for drinks with cyno, kaveh and tighnari. (try your best to tease him in front of them, but he’ll always have a playful quip right back at you.)

"really? because sometimes i think you love using me more as a pillow than an actual boyfriend. i’m only joking dear, i love you too.”

[seilahscopium]

Jealousy of Mine

♡ I grant a wish for whoever summons me and take one thing as a payment ♡ 𝐅𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Scaramoiche/Wanderer/Kunikuzushi

𝐬𝐰𝐨'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: highschool au. lazily proofread. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scara, who's that classmate of yours that's always picking on you one way or another. whether it's calling you names, starting competitions, or taking your last piece of gum before a math final. you, who doesn't back down from a fight when you see it and call him names right back, smirking when you get a higher grade than him, and even going as far as taking his wallet so you can buy a soda can from the vending machine. all he knows is he hates you. he hates that smile of yours. he hates it when you talk to him when no one else will. he hates how you have specific nicknames just for him. he hates all of it. ...so why is he getting all protective over you when he sees some random bullies shoving you in a locker because you couldn't shut your big ass mouth. he finds you in the boy's locker room, in his locker, and opens it, cringing as he does so. "are you a fucking creep this is low even for you..." his words trail off into silence when he sees bruises on your arms and his brows knit into a frown. he grabs your wrist and yanks you out of the locker, demanding to know who did this. he's pissed. not at you. but because someone dared to do to you what he does. only he's allowed to do stuff like this to you. only he's allowed to be mean to you. no one else. "aww, is someone getting soft for me?" you hum with a lazy smirk. you feel his grip on your wrist tighten and you hiss. "Scara can you loosen the grip there? i just got shoved in a damn locker give me a pause." "just shut up for two seconds will you and give me the damn names?" "why should i tell you" "i swear to god if i have to ask again" anddddddd you two already bickering again. Scara, who takes you to the nurse's office to get you an ice pack, and when you finally tell him the names he goes so nonchalant it was a complete contrast to when he was questioning you. "oh. those guys. really?" his arms are crossed and he's leaning against the wall while you put the ice pack against your cheek that was bruised. "they're so weak. surprised you couldn't have done anything, guess you really are a worm" hmm. so he's not freaking out. it seems he's not that concerned anymore. until the next day rolled around and the people who shoved you in the locker were missing from school. "yeah they never got home last night. don't you find that weird?" you asked Scara, who sat right beside you. "nah, that group was rumored to be taking drugs or something late at night. so they must've stayed out for longer this time," he replied, bored. "mm. makes sense." and it slips from your mind. forgetting they never made it home and they were no longer people in your life. sometimes, Scara will rant to an unlucky victim about what an "uggo" you are cause you pissed him off. it was an unlucky victim because the key was to just stay silent. don't agree or disagree during Scara's fit. and they did not stay silent because they just had to have an opinion. "they're so annoying! that uggo really thinks she's all that! her looks match her horrible personality. and she barely has any manners and just wants to start shit with me!" not exactly true. since he was the one who took her erasure so now she took three of his pencils that had an erasure on it. and, she wasn't really planning on giving them back. "and she was wearing these heels that made her taller than me and were too loud-" "yn? ugly?" Scara's heart seemed to stop at those words from the guy next to him. "I think she's quite attractive though?" Scara completely froze at this point, trying to comprehend what this complete nobody was even saying. "she's also nice. she gave me her lunch money the other day and saved me the starvation. i wonder why you would hate-" "what?" Scara was glaring at the person, his eyes glowing with...anger? no..it wasn't that. it was jealousy. Scara crossed his arms with a 'hmph' and looked ahead at the board, looking very upset.

the person was left confused and just went back to talking to his friend nearby, but little did he know Scara was spiraling in his mind. if this kid ended up getting close to you and would eventually break your heart because that's what people do in relationships, wouldn't he be putting you through pain? a nobody like him putting you through pain just like those bullies. why does everyone seem to want to hurt you? only he's allowed to hurt you don't they know this? you're his. to bully. to hurt. to wound. to yell at. and he's kind enough to give you breaks once in a while and look after your health. and he would help put you back together each time. he would take care of you. but they wouldn't. they don't care. and thats how this kid next to him. who said nothing bad at all. became a threat to Scara and your world just like those bullies did. Scara, who later that evening has a knife to the classmates throat in a deserted place with no eye witnesses, and was threatening him. this guy was going to take you away from him and hurt you. he had to prevent that didnt he? there was cuts on the guys arms, legs, a few on his cheek, and maybe a bruise forming on his stomach where scara currently put pressure on with his foot. he looked down at the pleading victim. "so you'll leave them alone? you won't talk to her ever again?" "yes yes! i'm sorry i won't speak of her or go within a 7-foot radius of her! im sorry! a-and i won't tell anyone about this! so you can get exactly what you want!" what a wuss. this was so damn boring. "hmm"

the guy under him seemed relieved, thinking Scara was going to say yes. "actually..." Scara put the knife under the guy's chin, making them force eye contact. "i think i don't wanna do that. everyones bound to break their promises. better safe than sorry, don't you think?" the guys face dropped and was going to yell but... "sorry not sorry," he said, making a swift cut across the guy's neck. Scara looked down at the lifeless body and groaned at the thought of your annoying complaining. you'd probably whine and say "this isnt right!" he goes on to hide the body. it'll surely save him the headache. he was used to it. Scara has only done it a few times. even before the bullies. one time it was actually a teacher, that was actually an interesting threat he dealt with. teenagers were just boring compared to adults it seemed.

he put all the threats where they belonged. buried and dead in different parts of the woods. he even had to separate the bullies' body parts since they were so big. don't you see how much work you are putting him through?? strangely enough, the victim's words echoed in his head. y/n? ugly? I think they are quite attractive though? ...then you came to mind. smiling whenever you did something right. that cute pout you had when he beat you in sports. and those times you'd steal his wallet to get soda but you'd always bring him a snack or drink too. ...ah. "damn it" he murmured. Scara placed his forehead on the handle of the shovel, blushing. as far as he's concerned. you were average. and you gave him more work to do than he'd initially like to put himself through. if anyone saw him, they would feel highly uncomfortable and even call him mad. he had a splotch of blood on his cheek. some dirt on his hands. and a body on the ground in front of him that he was currently covering with the shovel. and he was blushing over a girl.

[in1-nutshell]

Bulkhead's daughter with the opposite personality

SFW, Platonic, Familial, Cybertronain reader

TFP

Buddy was a sparkling that would usually come around the construction sites to play around or look around for scraps.

Like Bulkhead, there were many bots that did have an optic out for the little one especially with the heavy machinery around.

He was not particularly fond of the kid being around.

Not because he didn’t like them, on the contrary.

He was quite fond of the kid.

She was a little genius and a nice bot.

Sure, they were a bit cold at first, but she was just a bit of a shy bot.

“Have you met Buddy?”--Bulkhead

Bulkhead shows Buddy to one of the new recruits,

Buddy just stares right into their optics.

“D-does she do that all the time? She looks like she’s going to rip my helm off.”—Random bot

“Buddy wouldn’t do that. She’s just a bit shy. Isn’t that right Buddy?”--Bulkhead

Buddy stares harder at the bot.

“…”—Random bot

“…Anyways, here is where the heavy machinery is placed.”--Bulkhead

When the team had to use some of the older equipment, she made sure to look at it before everyone else did, deeming which ones were safer to use than others.

How did she manage to sneak into the equipment shed before they did?

No one knows and she isn’t telling.

The kid slowly opens to the others.

But she never opened up about her living status or where were her guardians, they just knew they were never at home.

Bulkhead promised himself to look after the kid a bit more after that.

“Hey Buddy, did you fuel yet?”--Bulkhead

“Not yet, I still have to finish repairing Breakdown’s hammer, the blasted thing got cracked again… stinking Senate and their refusal for getting better equipment…”--Buddy

Bulkhead puts a servo on her shoulder.

“Let’s take a break. We refuel, maybe a walk around the site and then we come back to the hammer. I’m sure Breakdown wouldn’t mind.”--Bulkhead

Buddy looks at the hammer then at Bulkhead.

She abruptly stands up and grabs Bulkhead’s servo marching the fueling station.

Bulkhead just smiles and goes along with it.

The war breaks out soon thereafter.

Everything goes too fast for Bulkhead.

One minute he was waving bye to Buddy, the next he found himself an Autobot with the Wrecker’s.

He did his best to try and get in contact with Buddy, but he got no response.

Bulkhead doesn’t even know if she was even on the same side as him.

Breakdown running up to Bulkhead.

“Breakdown?”--Bulkhead

“You’re gonna want to see this.”--Breakdown

Both mech walk into the main room where Wheeljack was about to present someone to the rest of the Wrecker’s.

“This is our new equipment and weapons assistant of mine, Buddy.”--Wheeljack

Buddy looks around the group of taller bots until she spots Bulkhead and Breakdown.

“Bulkhead? Breakdown?”--Buddy

She fast walks to them both and hugs them.

Breakdown doesn’t get much of that first hug because Bulkhead practically scooped her up burying her in his arms.

Did her new position in the unit make Bulkhead worry?

Yes. Yes, it did.

But at the same time knew that Buddy wasn’t going to be seeing much action.

Buddy stayed mostly to herself in the workshop.

If she did go outside, she was mainly with Bulkhead, Breakdown and Wheeljack.

On the battle field…

“We need reinforcements!”--Breakdown

“We are the reinforcements!”--Wheeljack

“But we won’t last long with all this heavy fire—”--Bulkhead

The group sees a bunch of Con’s dropping at a fast rate.

The shots seemed to be coming from the bot’s side.

Wheeljack takes out some scanner and looks around.

“Did we have a sniper on the team? I don’t remember that…”--Breakdown

“Me neither.”--Bulkhead

Wheeljack’s optics widen with a smirk on his face.

“The kids really got some skills she needs to tell us.”--Wheeljack

Bulkhead turns around.

“You don’t mean—”--Bulkhead

“Look for yourselves.”--Wheeljack

Bulkhead and Breakdown take out their scanners and look where Wheeljack was looking at.

Sure enough, in a small nook, high above the ground was Buddy firing a rifle, taking out more Cons in the process.

“I don’t know how to feel about this right now…”--Bulkhead

“I do. Way to go kiddo!”—Breakdown

When Breakdown had defected, it was the same day Buddy heard that she would be moving to another department.

She didn’t want to leave everyone.

Especially Bulkhead, who had become her second father.

Bulkhead still remembered the night before she had to leave filled with tears finally getting out after a long façade of everything being okay.

Bulkhead made sure that he and Wheeljack were there to wave Buddy off.

Buddy giving her final good-bye.

“I’ll contact you guys as soon as I reach the other base.”--Buddy

“You better.”--Bulkhead

“Take care kiddo.”--Wheeljack

Wheeljack pats Buddy’s helm affectionately.

Buddy squeezes Bulkhead’s servo one more time before letting go and walking to the shuttle.

She turns around and gives one last wave.

The two Wrecker’s wave back sadly as the door shut.

The ship was off.

Wheeljack pats Bulkhead on the back.

“She’ll be fine Bulk. Buddy’s a smart one.”--Wheeljack

“Yeah… I’m gonna miss her though.”--Bulkhead

“Same Bulk, same…”--Wheeljack

A couple days later Bulkhead got a message saying that Buddy’s ship had been in the crossfires of enemy fire.

No survivors.

It tore the two Wrecker’s sparks hearing the news.

Bulkhead smashed so many things that afternoon…

Wheeljack couldn’t bear to look at Buddy’s spot in the workshop for the longest time.

Breakdown heard about the news the last time he was in combat with Bulkhead.

He had never seen the bot with so much hatred in his optics.

He yelled at him about what happened to Buddy, as if it was his fault.

Knockout remembers the somber face Breakdown had when he came back.

Meanwhile…

Buddy is not dead.

She managed to get into an escape pod before everything went Boom!

The pod landed on Earth.

There she was found by a small family.

The Fowlers.

The family decided to hide the poor scared bot and welcomed her into their family.

It was a rough adjustment, but they made it work.

Buddy in her alt mode in the garage.

The door opens.

“Mrs. Fowler? Mr. Fowler? William? What seems to be the trouble?”--Buddy

Mrs. Fowler has a bunch of blankets in her arms, Mr. Fowler has some small white machine in one arm and a sheet in the other, little William has a bowl full of popcorn and candy.

“Buddy, please, it’s Ma and Pa.”--Ma

“Okay, Ma? Pa? William? What is all this? Do you need a ride somewhere? Is there a playdate I wasn’t aware of?”--Buddy

Pa motions Buddy to move a bit.

She does move a bit to the side of the garage.

“William told us you’ve been a bit homesick lately. Missing your friends and family.”--Pa

“…Yes, just a bit…”--Buddy

“So, we decided to help that a bit.”--Ma

“How?”--Buddy

“Movie night!”--William

“Movie night? Here?”--Buddy

“You’re family to us Buddy, I think it’s about high time you join in on some of our human traditions, as a family.”--Ma

Silence…

“Buddy?”--William

“Sorry… If I was not in my alt mode right now, you’d see me crying and hugging you all.”--Buddy

William sets his popcorn and rushes to hug Buddy’s hood.

It feels warm.

The parents walk over and gently pat the alt mode.

Ma drapes a spare blanket on Buddy while the others grab their own blankets and wait for the projector to start.

Buddy made sure to protect the family with her spark.

She grew especially fond of the little boy, William.

William steps out of the house and into the garage where Buddy was in.

“William?”--Buddy

He just sits on the ground next to Buddy’s alt mode with his legs pulled close to his chest.

“…Do you want to talk about it?”--Buddy

William shakes his head.

“…You want to go out?”--Buddy

“But Ma said—”--William

“I’ll deal with Ma when she comes home with Pa. Right now, its you who I’m worried about.”--Buddy

Buddy pops the door open.

“What do you say, ‘special agent Fowler’?”--Buddy

The boy smiles a bit, wiping his tears and crawling into the back seat.

“Have I mentioned you’re the best sis ever?”--William

Buddy chuckles a bit getting ready to head out.

“Haven’t heard that too often, though I wouldn’t mind hearing it more.”--Buddy

Both laugh as they head outside the garage.

Years later…

“I guess I was right about that ‘Special Agent’ thing, huh? How are we going to celebrate today? Ice cream? Donuts? What about that Apple Pie you said you were craving earlier?”--Buddy

Fowler smiles a bit inside Buddy’s alt mode.

Buddy ended up becoming his vehicle throughout the years until eventually joining him in his workplace.

It was quite the story to tell.

Buddy was the one to suggest the silo as her new permeant place instead of the garage.

She started immediately making the place feel less hollow.

Working on devices that would help her try and contact her team as well as traps for any Decepticon dumb enough to land on Earth.

She had been at the ends of finishing a prototype for a groundbrigde when one of her receptors went off.

She quickly answered it hoping for someone she knew.

It was Optimus Prime himself.

She nearly leaped for joy hearing her leader on the other end.

When the team arrived, she nearly passed out seeing that Bulkhead was amongst them.

She held her composure welcoming them to Earth.

“Welcome everyone to—OOF!”--Buddy

Bulkhead had raced past everyone to hug Buddy nearly weeping in the process.

Buddy hugged back.

“Are we missing something?”--Ratchet

“That’s something I’d like to know too.”--Fowler

“What’s that?”--Ratchet

Much explaining to do.

Buddy was pretty much the human to bot relation expert having more years on the planet under her belt than they did.

The team is surprised at how a cold and calculated bot was someone Bulkhead considered a daughter.

But after a bit of time, they did see the dynamic and in a way it was nice to see.

[r3starttt]

Don’t delete the kisses

a/n: I got my inspo from “See You In My 19th Life” also, felt too personal. Basically reader inspired on me lol

Pt 2. | Prt.3 | Prt.4

Warnings: mentions of bullying, suicide, lots of angst and fluff

“I see the signs of a lifetime, you ‘til I die”

You’ve had seventeen lives so far. You’ve been all kinds of people in all kinds of places, and you always remember each one of them. It always happens for different reasons, it could be a smell that reminded you of a perfume, a new dish that apparently you’ve already tried before, a face that felt familiar, a song that made you feel weirdly in love.

At first it was horrifying, it was so confusing and you made so many mistakes. You told people about it. You tried to find your loved ones, tried to approach to them again because your heart still missed them. But eventually you learned to handle it. Eventually the pain of past life losses disappeared and you just learned to ignore your not so nice gift.

You’ve also learned to adapt to every life, which was becoming easier every time because the knowledge, talents and hobbies from every life apparently stayed with you. Maybe it was your soul?

You stopped having complains and learned to value and enjoy everything. You appreciated every mistake you made because it helped you learn for a future life, you enjoyed feeling everything so deeply because it would help you remember the next time you reincarnate, you showed your love for everyone and did everything you wished so you wouldn’t have any regrets. You learned to be positive and take advantage of everything that was offered to you on each life.

Until now.

Ever since you were a child you’ve felt empty. Loved but not enough to fill your heart, admired but feeling like you’re not worth it, with friends that care for you and a lovely family that provides you all you need and all you could ever ask for but feeling like you don’t deserve them. Maybe you were born sad?

It seems like your whole life happened in the blink of an eye. Maybe it’s the sadness that hasn’t allowed you to enjoy this life properly, but where does that come from?

Maybe you’ve got used to sadness so much that you don’t know how to handle it on this life? It’s frustrating, not even all the knowledge in the world, all the abilities you’ve learned and your old soul can handle such feeling. It’s the first thing you’ve been unable to control, ever.

There is a reason why it got out of control though. When you were eleven you were bullied by your whole class, including some professors. And it didn’t matter how much privilege you had, neither you or your parents could do anything about it.

That’s the moment all the lonely, angry and sad in you became overwhelming, the moment you started to believe in god again just to beg him every day to kill you, to let you die.

And even if that was almost ten years ago it still haunts you. The humiliation, the anger, the loneliness. And you can’t handle it, not because you don’t know how to, but because your body doesn’t allow you to.

Your heart always reminds you of it, like it happens with your past lives, there’s always a smell, a word, an action. The way those kids made you feel, they things those adults said to you, the way your parents broke in tears when you first told them, the awkwardness at home whenever they tried to make you talk to them. It all stuck to you forever.

“What if it’s not meant for me? Love”

However there was someone that was worth trying to live. Her name is Ellie, and you’ve been dating her for some years now.

She’s your childhood best friend, the person you trust the most on this world and the only one that doesn’t make you feel overwhelmed. Your girlfriend and the lover you’ve feel more connected to or all your lives.

“Do you believe in soulmates?” You’re both laying on her bed, staring at the ceiling and talking about random stuff, whatever goes trough your minds “Or…. reincarnation”

“None of them, do you?” you could see her moving her head towards you from the corner of your eye “Yeah, I’d like us to be soulmates and find each other on each life” a chuckle came out of Ellie’s mouth “you’re so cheesy ughh” you laughed back, kicking her shoulder with your arm to which she complained.

“I know but, I’ve never loved someone this much el” you turned your head too, smiling at the look of Ellie’s shy smile and and her slightly tainted cheeks “you’ve really saved my life, you know it” Just as those words were spoken, her face changed completely.

“all good?”

You could see the worry on her face, in the way her eyes studied yours and on the pout that slowly appeared. You just sighed back, hesitating a bit and debating if you should tell her the truth or not.

“It’s probably my birthday, I’ll be fine” the reassurment in your voice didn’t seem to convince her, so you spoke again “el, things have been good in the past few years, it’s not gonna change suddenly”

“What if they do?” she’s right, what if they do?

“They won’t, I would already know and I would tell you, I promise” you do know, but you won’t tell her, not now.

“You tell me to get over it and to take you out, but I can’t and I’m too scared. “

You’ve tried to take your life some years ago, before Ellie and you started to date. Honestly, to this day you still don’t know how you managed to not die. It was late at night, right before your birthday, it always makes you feel extremely sad for some reason, you believe is the fear of growing up, of things getting harder.

“And here’s the night bus, I have to go. And the doors are closing and you’re waving”

You’ve had that feeling for over a month. All your healing process falling apart just for your birthday? you still feel ashamed about it. You just took some random blade you’d saved for this moment and started to practically stab your wrists.

All your thoughts mixed with the weirdly feeling of pain and satisfaction and the blood dripping down your arms blinded you, and in the blink of an eye you just loose the balance and fainted.

But you promised yourself that if you didn’t make it back then, you would try it again, no matter what. Or at least you tried to convince yourself.

“What if it’s not meant for me? Love”

“What are you gonna gift me?” you decided to better change the topic before your thoughts could overwhelm any of you “What do you want?” Her hands tangle with yours.

“You haven’t got me anything yet?” a laugh scapes your mouth “I do but…. I don’t know” Ellie loved handmade gifts, however she always does something different for you. “You know I love your gifts el, you can give me a rock and I would admire it forever”

Your hands slowly move from Ellie’s, cupping her face and making her look at you. She’s so pretty, with the light of the sun coming through the window snd hitting her freckles just perfect, making her eyes look shiny too.

“So you want a rock then?” of course she had to make jokes, she can’t handle romantic moments, gets to nervous. You just roll your eyes.

“You know, a perfect gift would be that you stopped using those crusty converse” she immediately groans, pushing your hands away from her face and leaning on her back

“What’s wrong with them?”

“They smell, they’re broken and they’re dirty as fuck because you never clean them”

“They don’t smell! and I glued them recently”

“Ellie, please”

“But don’t call me by my full name”

“I’m not! And I’ve always called you Ellie”

“No you haven’t, you call me El”

“El, please buy some new converse for my birthday”

“And what do I get for doing it?”

“Your girlfriends happiness”

“I think that’s a sign. I’m losing self control and it’s you”

And that’s how you it was for the rest of the day. Ellie pouting every time you teased her but calling you dramatic if you said anything about her teasing you. Also, Ellie suddenly telling you random facts about dinosaurs and space and just random stuff in general.

That was the las time you saw her, until your birthday. She’d come earlier than anyone else to have more time alone with you. It’s not that you had many friends but your family always came too so they’d keep you busy all day.

A day before you were looking through your closet, finding all the cute gifs Ellie had made you, admiring the details of all her drawings and reading the letters. Watching all the Polaroids your mom took of you two, the gift she made for you when she asked you to be her girlfriend, a bracelet she gifted you when you asked her to be her friend, a letter you made for her from when you first fought.

And it made you feel horrible, because the decision was already made, the letters for all the people you cared about were already written and saved in your desk. Your phone was already unlocked so everyone could have access to it, your room was tidy and your closet clean.

You were just waiting for her, for tomorrow, for all your family to be together when you left so it would be hopefully easier to everyone. For everyone to be there and get their letters, for Ellie to not be alone when she got the news, for your parents and your girlfriend to be comforted by each other’s presence.

You went downstairs, looking for Ellie since you heard your parents already speaking with her. They were all siting at the dining room.

It made your heart melt to see you happy she looked the moment she saw you. Her eyes, her pretty nose scrunching a little, her smile widening.

“Can I see my gift already?” Your parents laughed in disbelief, telling you to at lest greet her properly before asking her about a gift.

“Your parents told me you’ll open them later” she chuckled, looking at your parents and then back at you, you did the same.

You stepped closer to her, grabbing her hands and taking her to your room.

“Can you at least tell me what is it? I’ll act surprised I promise”

“A rock”

“Haha so funny el”

You closed the door behind you, watching Ellie sitting on your bed. She just stared at you, with puppy eyes of course. You really hoped you wouldn’t remember this when you reincarnated, or at least that It wouldn’t hurt as much as it does right now.

“What’s that box?” her finger pointed at the box you were just looking trough last night. You walked towards it and took it to the bed, sitting besides Ellie.

“All your gifts” she looked at you in pure shock “This is something I did for you when we were like…. Seven or something, why’d you still have it?”

“My mom saved all this things, it’s cute isn’t?”

“I feel exposed”

“What’s wrong with it? I love all of it”

“Your gift is not gonna fit in here”

“So it’s not a rock and defined not a new pair or converse” your eyes moved towards Ellie’s shoes, she just sighed

“Stop it, you’re the only one that notices them”

“My parents do, my mom asked my why you never changed them” that was a lie, but how could Ellie know?

You did the same thing as last nigh, take a final look to all the gifts that Ellie had made to you, not now with her. You’d made fun of her and she would just frown her eyebrows and eventually pout if she felt really ashamed of it. You’d make her read the letters out loud and ask her about the process of every draw she’d made of you.

“This letter is for me, why didn’t you give it to me?” Now you understood the feeling, karma. “We fought, I decided it was better to apologize in person” her hands leaned the letter towards you, making you read it out loud just as you’d made her do to you.

“January 13 2020” you stopped as she laughed “don’t laugh, you wanted me to read it I’ll read every detail then”

“I’m sorry for whatever I did to make you mad, I’m still not sure what it was- Ellie, you’re such a dramatic person”

“Me? You’re the one that’s dramatic for making a whole letter even though you hate writing just to randomly apologize”

“This just proves how much I love you, shut up”

“Right, keep reading”

“I’m still not sure what it was, but I feel like apologizing because Dina told me how much you’ve been crying and how awful I made you feel-“ you got interrupted by a loud gasp

“Why would Dina told you?” She slapped her hands on her face, groaning “only fucking fake friends these days” you laughed

“Hey don’t say that! I love Dina, she’s the sweetest and I bet she also tells you all I tell her about you, you’re overreacting for something that happened three years ago”

“You speak about me with her?” You nodded

“I want you to know that I’m so fucking grateful for having someone like you in my life. For a long time you were the only one that made me laugh, the only one that made me feel happy and loved and like life was worth it. You’re the reason I keep trying” you could feel the knot of tears forming in your throat, so painful “I feel like you got mad for what I said, but I want you to know that I didn’t mean it in a bad way, I wanted you to know how I truly felt about you and us and my life. I didn’t want to lie to you, I can’t. I was hoping you could understand that I didn’t tell you that before because I was afraid of how would you react, because I care for you snd I don’t want you to get hurt just for my weakness-“

The door of the room got opened after some small knocks were heard. Everyone had got there already. You didn’t realize how long you’ve been in your room with Ellie, totally worth it though.

You just saved the letter in the box again. You’ve purposely let it in your room for Ellie to take a look of it later that day, for her to have something left from you.

You both went downstairs again, Ellie went with your friends and you went to greet each family member, having some small talk with everyone and thanking them for being here.

And the time today felt extremely fast. Maybe this was the first birthday you’ve properly enjoyed, maybe you were excited or anxious, maybe it was the calm you’ve felt for the first time in years, maybe-

“I wanna eat the cake already, can’t you hurry them?” Ellie’s hands positioned around your waist, hugging you from behind and pulling you closer to her. You could see her pretty face resting on your shoulder, staring at you.

“You smell like gummies” you smiled without even realizing, now looking at Ellie. Her lips pressed in yours, the sour and sweet flavor invading your tongue “I ate gummies”.

“There’s tons of food El, why don’t you just eat something that’s not candy? Instead of asking for cake that by the way you won’t get to eat” she pinched your stomach slightly “why won’t I get to eat cake?” “I don’t think there’s enough for everyone

“I deserve it more than them, I’ve been with you, listening to your annoying voice every day” now you pinched her back “shut up or you really won’t get any”

“Do we really have to stay here with everyone? Your grandpa freaks me out” you chuckled “stop being rude to my family” “do we?” “let’s go outside”

And so you walked to the small garden behind your house, sitting on the cold grass with Ellie

“You seem happier this year…. do you feel happier?” you can see her toying with her fingers, staring at them to avoid eye contact “are you worried about me?” your gaze is now focused on your family, inside the house. You can see your friends almost eating each other on the closest window, it makes you laugh.

“The letter…. am I really that important to you?”

“You’re my best friend since forever el, you’re my girlfriend, why wouldn’t you?”

“I don’t know, I thought I didn’t help you at all”

“You do”

You turned around again, facing Ellie. She was picking the grass. How were you supposed to leave her? How were you supposed to ever live without her?

You grabbed her face with your hands, pulling her closer for a kiss. Her lips felt just perfect for yours, her skin was so soft, her face just the right size for your hands to fit, her hair the right strength for you to feel it every time you two kissed. You couldn’t do this to her

You tried to break the kiss, but her hands moved behind your back, pulling you closer to her again and deepening the kiss. You could feel her smile trough the kiss, she’s so fucking pretty.

“I love you Ellie, I’ve always loved you, don’t ever doubt it” she laughs in confusion “I love you too” It was the third time you probably said it out loud, you really wished you would’ve told her sooner.

“I’m electric, a romantic cliché”

“Take this, I was planning on give it to you later but…. I guess it’s the right time” you looked confused at her, she was looking for something on her hoodie pockets. A rock

Maybe you should wait, just a little more, just for her.

The rock was painted with your favorite colors, it was your face. Why is she so lovely? Why can’t her love fill your heart? What’s wrong with you?

She slowly puts it on your hands, studying your face, looking for any reaction. You lean on her, hugging her as both of your bodies fall on the grass. You can’t see her but she’s definitely smiling.

“I can’t imagine a life without you Ellie, don’t ever dear to leave me” she thought you were just being romantic because of the gift, but you mean it, you hope you fin her always and forever. To hopefully have the life you won’t be able to enjoy with her this time.

Her hands rubbing your back, her nose smelling your perfume, nuzzling on your neck “I won’t, I promise”

“Let’s go for the cake, I can hear your stomach” you rest your arms on the grass, positioning each one besides Ellie’s face and giving her another kiss. Her eyes look so pretty.

The sky turns orange as you get inside the house again. You hate this part of the day because it means it’s almost over, and today specially you want everything but the day to end. You hope every smiley face in the house can forgive you for what you’re about to do, you hope they understand.

So now you’re siting in the middle of the table, with everyone you love around you as they sing happy birthday to you. Ellie is sitting besides you, taking pictures of you. And you can only thank her in a small whisper, and thank the universe in your mind for letting her have that picture as her last memory of you.

The minute the song is over everyone claps, watching you turn off the candle. You always wished for happiness, but today you’re just wishing for forgiveness. Your smile is wide, it hurts to lie to everyone there.

Before your mom cuts the cake for you as she usually did, you grab the knife and cut a big slice of cake for Ellie. “Can we open the gifts?” you ask loudly to everyone, knowing that way your parents wouldn’t make you wait more.

Everyone’s eating cake, sitting on the couches in the living room, most men in the room staring up, Ellie sitting besides you on the floor and offering you to open the gifts to “help you” but you know she’s just gossiping.

Whenever you didn’t like a gift you’d look at Ellie and she’s look back at you, like you could communicate with each other just with your eyes. She’d laugh and pass you another gift.

If you did like a gift then she’d take it from you and would stare at every detail of it. She’d separate discreetly the ones you liked from the ones you didn’t, she’d usually keep those or Insist you on selling them online.

However the more gifts you opened the more anxious you got. “Where’s your gift el?” you whispered as your mom passed you another gift, that seemed to be the last one. But it was way to small to be from Ellie “mine goes last, open that one, come on”

And so you did, it was a set of some pink pijamas, and the moment you opened them you turned your face at Ellie, she was already laughing “Shut up”

“Wait, there one more” you heard your mom speaking as she walked to the kitchen. Everyone looked at her, waiting to see what it was.

She returned with a big rectangular canvas. Did she just made a huge fucking painting for me? you thought, looking back at Ellie who seemed clearly nervous.

“I’ll give you the letter later, I didn’t want to get exposed in front of your whole family” she whispers

You take the canvas and turn it around. It was a portrait of a picture she took of you the day she asked you to date. It was so detailed, so colorful and just so right. You showed it proudly to your family. Everyone cheered Ellie and you couldn’t help but smile at the sight of her shy face, her cheeks covered in blush as she looked at her fingers, just as she did whenever she felt nervous. Your friends making fun of Ellie and you for being so “adorable” as you heard them say.

And the rest of the night Ellie just stood close to you, listening to everyone share all the fun memories and stories they had with you. She shared ridiculous things she’d lived with you, making you cover your face ashamed. But also making you laugh as she always did.

And you couldn’t be more grateful at the end of the day because finally, for one whole day you could finally be happy again, you didn’t felt pressured or anxious or sad or overwhelmed at all, and you were with everyone you loved. You could finally go, you were just waiting for living one happy moment in your life before you took such an important decision, and this was it. Today had been all you’ve ever wished for.

So when everyone left and your parents stayed cleaning you could only feel peacefulness overcoming your body. You went to your room and laid on your bed, Ellie was still there. She had to give you her letter and you couldn’t leave without reading it.

The big canvas was already in your room, right next to your bed. You were cuddling her as you read the letter.

“Happy birthday baby. I hope this year can be different, I hope you can get better, I hope you can be happier, and I hope I’m still here every day to see you smile more and more.

I remember starting the painting and regretting immediately because it was gonna take so long and I’m lazy as fuck. But I made it :)

I had to lie to you many times and tell you Joel needed my help with some stuff just so I could finish it, hope you didn’t get mad at it.

I’ve been noticing you off lately, but if I’m honest I’m too scared to ask. But you know you can always tell me anything, I’ll always understand and I’ll always listen, no judgment.

I’m proud of you for making it another year, and I’m the happiest person ever because I have you and I’m watching you try again and again. I know you’ll get better.

I still remember how nervous I was when I asked you to date, I can’t stop thinking about it lately, maybe it’s because of the painting? but I feel the same even after dating you for years, too cliche for you make me feel the butterflies on the stomach, a lot.

I’m glad we’ve got to grow up together, I can’t imagine this life without you. The other day you told me about this, about reincarnation and soulmates, I don’t believe on it, but if it’s real I’ll make sure I’m with you always. I promise.

I can’t wait for your birthday, I wanna see your reaction and I’m containing so much for not telling you already what it is. If you’re reading this then I didn’t regret writing you this or you found it without me noticing like you did last year, don’t do that again pls :(

Anyway, I want you to know that you’re the fucking best, the prettiest girl ever and I love you so fucking much.

Ellie :)”

She saw how you folded the letter, looking at your face for any response “I love you so fucking much too” you moved your head slightly up so you could properly kiss her. You’ve never kissed her so much in one day, you also wished you would.

She stares back at you, with those puppy eyes you love so much, and her dumb smile now a bit shiny due to the kiss.

Her hand moves to your neck, pressing your head on top of her chest. Her other hand moved to the puffy pink blanket that you had in your bed, moving it up to cover both of your bodies. Your hand moves on top of of her tattoo, caressing it softly with your thumb.

And before you realize you two fall asleep, not knowing how your life’s were about to change in less than twenty four hours.

Maybe it was the anxiety coming back but you woke up earlier than usual. You slowly removed Ellie’s arms from yours, placing them over your pillows.

You stood there for some minutes, just staring at her, at her gift next to your bed. Were you being selfish?

You slowly walked towards your desk, picking the letters and placing them on top of it so everyone could see them easily, you also placed your phone on top of them. This was it.

You hated yourself for not waiting for Ellie to leave, for making her see it and be there, but you had waited enough already.

You walked quietly and slowly to the bed, placing Ellie’s letter besides her. Then you walked to the bathroom, locking yourself in it just in case anyone woke up and went to look for you.

You regretted not taking your phone with you, maybe some music would help.

You slowly remove your clothes. You hear the water run. There’s so thoughts on your head right now.

You don’t even realize but the cuts are already there, making the blood run all over the tub and covering your body with it. Your eyes close and the only sound echoing in your ears is your own breathing.

This is nothing like what you’ve done before, this is it.

“Dear loved Ellie. El, Els

I love you so much, don’t ever forget it, don’t ever doubt it. I’m always gonna be with you and I promise, I swear that we’ll meet again. Please read this first before you do anything else. I’m probably not in bed right now, I knew you would stay, don’t panic.

Ever since you know me I’ve been sad, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I told you how I remember mas past lives when we were younger, remember? and you just laughed at me, but I want you to believe it this time. And I want you to never forget me, I want you to meet me again, in another universe where I’m happy and we can get to live anything we didn’t lived here.

I waited just for you, I tried my best, I promised myself I would only try once, and if I failed then I would take it as a signal to say, but I can’t.

Your jokes, your laugh, your pretty face, the songs you played for me with your guitar, you made me stay and try so many times, but I gave up.

I can’t live lifte this forever, and it hurts me deeply to leave you, because you don’t deserve this and I don’t want to leave, but the pain I feel every day is bigger than what I want.

It’s not your fault, it’s no one’s fault actually.

You told me that whenever I could say things out loud I should write them, but never keep them just for myself, and so I’m doing it right now, hoping you, Dina, Jesse, my mom, my dad, my family, you all understand. I know you will.

I want you to find someone else to make happy, some one that’s worth your fucking amazing and pretty self, someone else that truly deserves your time and your jokes, and your songs on your guitar. Someone that stays with you forever.

I feel so ashamed, I just couldn’t say to anyone out loud how tired I felt, how badly I wanted to die. How my first and kiss though if the day was death, how exhausted I feel every day for no reason. I can’t tell you that the moment you leave I feel overwhelmed again, I feel weak and alone. I just can’t.

I also wanna thank you for being with me every time, for teaching me how to live, for not giving up on me and for being always with me.

I remember the first time we kissed, the first time we slept with each other, how shy you got after that and how much you wanted to tell me but couldn’t so I found out by reading your diary. How mad you got for me reading it but how much you thanked me once we did it. I remember every single one of our dates. I remember the first time you talked to me and I talked to you, the first time you slept and my house and the first time I slept at yours. I never forgot anything, I won’t ever forget.

I remember how you told me you wanted to go to college just so you could work and make us my dreamed house, with an art studio for both of us and a room to have many cats. How you told me that you didn’t want any kids but since you dated me you could only think of having a cute baby that looked just like me. How you got mad when I told you I wanted my last name to go first.

And I want you to live that with someone that’s really worth it.

I’m so sorry for making you stay with me for so long, for making you waist your best years of adolescence and childhood trying to cure me and my sadness. And I’m sorry I’m leaving you like this. But I know you’ll understand.

Words cannot express how much I adore you, how happy you made me, how much I’m in love with you.

Please forgive me.

I swear we’ll meet again, I swear I won’t leave you again, I swear I’ll stay.”

She woke up your parents, your dad unlocked the door. They couldn’t take it.

Now they didn’t understand. Why would you do this? Why didn’t you tell anyone? Did you ever asked for help and they didn’t notice?

Why?

Ellie was too broken to cry. She wanted to look at you but her eyes could only stay at your wrists. She could never forget.

Your parents were on their knees, unable to think, unable to move, just crying.

And so was Ellie. She couldn’t believe just a couple of hours ago she was cuddling with you and now you were gone. How did that even work? There could never exist something more terrifying that your parents sobs. Should she leave? Should she stay?

Should she even try anymore?

She felt so much anger, so much desperation and anxiety in her body. She was so shocked she couldn’t do anything else than stare.

You were gone, forever.

It’s been just a month since you died. She’s been unable to move from her bed, not wanting to eat, not wanting to sleep, feeling dead. She’s been reading your letter nonstop, over and over again, almost memorizing it already.

And your parents? Your family? They’re all broken, how could any of this even happen?

Your funeral was shocking for everyone. Everything had happened so fast, in less then a week, just right after your birthday.

Did you really had to do this?

Everyone felt so sick, for not knowing, for not saying a proper last goodbye to you, for not giving you a proper gift, for not taking enough pictures and videos of you, for not speaking to you enough that last day. For not noticing snd for not helping you.

And Ellie could only hope that she’ll meet you again as you always assured her. That all this pain will disappear eventually. That the love she feel for you would actually help her.

“Me and you were meant to be in love. I see the signs of a lifetime, you ‘til I die”