#so happy to talk to you tho! this is such a sweet message

[mooralltach]

MARS!! i hope you are so well and thriving in this brand-new season/month. Happy pride!! ⚔️ Have you any great big adventuring plans ahead of you or are you rather waiting for them to happen on their own time and terms? This is also a great moment to sincerely and personally oooh and aaaah over your recent-ish batch of all those weretiger-zoro's, jessssus they've brought me joy and it also makes me happy to see how much youve gotten to draw him!!! Oh the ones with those real plants and elements in them, i saved one of them as my phone lockscreen i like them sm......

SÄRMÄ!!!!!!!!! (giving you the biggest bro hug) Right back at ya! Wishing you a great pride and summer as well!! ⚔️ HMM well if all goes well, me and my dad want to do a cycling tour all the way to Southern France, one we've been planning for a few years now. I've done cycling holidays/tours before with both my parents as well as some friends, those were closer to home but have definitely inspired me to do many more! Dunno if the circumstances (work mostly lol) etc will allow us to go this year but we'll see. I'm definitely also always waiting for new adventures to happen though, so as long as I get to at least see places I haven't been to yet, it's good to me! How about you?? Any summer or holiday plans/adventures??

ALSO AOUGHHH..... THANK YOU SO MUCH.. I'm so glad you (and so many more people than I expected?!) are enjoying the weretiger Zoro's so much, he's so important to me AND fun to draw, and I've been thinking about that AU since friggin forever and am glad to finally get it out of my system and share it with everyone! It's also been great fun to see everyone joining in on the AU and giving amazing ideas, you guys are absolutely fueling me whahaah (also using one as your lockscreen......... wthelllll I'm more than honored!! That's so cool :''''0 ) Speaking of, I've been going absolutely INSANE about your tags everytime on ALL MY ART and have been looking to find a way to show/tell how much I love them!!! BRO do you understand what kind of effect your tags have on me!! They are like the most nutritious meal and the freshest juice to me I am INHALING them 😤! I have no idea how you keep finding new and entertaining sentences and just. perfect ways to describe my stuff and how you point out so many fun details even I hadn't noticed in my own art! (SHAKING YOU) I need you to know I go big eyes emoji everytime I see them and save every one of them to get endlessly inspired on every reread!

Hope you have the best of days, now as well as ahead of you!

[ln444]

dating lando. . .

cw: mentions of sex, f!reader, fluff, slight smut.

notes: my first post 😭 i'm not very confident abt it but i hope you guys will like it! my requests are open so don't hesitate if you have any suggestions or just want to talk ! enjoy<3

___________________________________________

physical touch; i feel like lando would be incredibly touchy, even if it's just his hand on your thigh or sitting beside you with your shoulders touching. he simply needs to feel close to you every chance he gets. in public, he might dial back his affection slightly because he treasures those private moments, but that won't stop him from stealing sweet, discreet kisses when no one is watching or quietly holding your hand because he just can't keep his hands off you. in crowded places, he's the kind of person who instinctively puts his arm around your waist to ensure your safety. when it's just the two of you, lando can't help but be hands-on. he'll find any excuse to touch you, whether it's running his fingers through your hair or playing with your hands while you're chilling. he'll pull you closer every time you're beside him, or even have you on his lap while he's engrossed in some random pc game. kissing you is practically an obsession for him, and it's not limited to your lips. he adores exploring every inch of your skin, planting kisses on your neck, nose, cheeks, hands, and thighs. however, his absolute favorite place to kiss is still your lips. every kiss from lando feels as passionate and full of adoration as the first time, and he can never get enough of it.

quality time; he would definitely message you whenever he's available to spend time with you and invite you to hang out. he absolutely loves your company, even if it's just the two of you relaxing on the bed, watching entertaining videos and tiktoks, or having silly conversations. however, his favorite moments are when you embark on fun dates, like going to the arcade or go karting. his heart is full of joy from seeing you happy during these moments and he wants to tattoo every second of them into his memory. lando likes all types of dates because his primary desire is to share time with you. it might depend on his mood; sometimes he just wants to chill with you all day, staying in bed or playing games together. other times; he wants to venture out and go dance with you all night or go for a midnight swim. in the end, what really matters is that you are together.

words; in the early days of your relationship it was kinda hard for lando to express his feelings, he felt a bit uneasy because he was not used to vocalizing his feelings, he's more the type to keep everything for himself. but, with you, he learns surprisingly fast to talk about how he feels, both negative or positive emotions. you became his safe place. he would always praise you when he has the chance to even if it's for small random things, he would always remind you how much he's proud of you (and you do the same too ofc). even if this man loves teasing you, he also knows when to be serious and how to make you feel valued and loved. he uses a lot of nicknames like "angel", "love" or "sweetheart" because he knows how much you love them and how special it makes you feel. you were definitely the first one to say i love you, not that lando didn't want to say it but he was just too nervous to do it but since you did, he can't help but say it everyday.

sex; lando always makes sure you feel safe and comfortable when you're having sex. it doesn't mean that he doesn't like it rough tho, he absolutely loves having rough sex with you, even more when he's stressed or frustrated because of a race; hair pulling, spanking, face fucking, dirty talk... but always while making sure that you're okay. when it comes to vanilla sex, lando can become the softest man ever, he would whisper sweet things to you like; "that's my pretty girl", "i'm so lucky to have such a beautiful girl just for me", "you're doing so good angel", accompanied by gentle touches and kisses all over your body or when he's softly making love to you. his favorite thing is eating you out, he's literally obsessed with your pussy and will find any excuses to get a taste, even more when you ride his face while your eyes are locked with his.

[lwwife]

Since you’re taking requests could you please do one where it’s R and Leah’s like 3 year anniversary or something and R plans out a nice surprise but Leah forgets and shows up late which upsets R a lot. Something angsty but with a happy ending 🤭

You forgot?

Angst (Happy ending), some fluff

-

“You forgot? You fucking forgot?! Are you shitting me right now Leah?” You scream at her, hands out.

“Baby I’m sor-“she tries.

“No! You don’t get to call me that right now. Just drive.” Leah sighed and pressed down on the pedal.

-

“Happy anniversary baby girl” You whisper to Leah, her eyes fluttering open at the light kisses being left all over her face.

“Mmmh” she grins and turns to you, pulling you in for a proper one. “Happy anniversary” she whispers, smiling brightly at you and then leaning in to kiss you again. Your kisses turn heated and end in some passionate morning sex, causing you both to run a little late, but you both didn’t care, claiming it had to be done to celebrate your third anniversary. Since you were now running late you had agreed to give each other your presents later tonight.

“Darling, meet me there at 6:30 okay? I’ll text you the address so you can pop it in your phone” You peck her lips, walking to the other side of the garage to get in your car.

“Babe please tell me what it is” she whines.

“No can do my love, it’s a surprise just wait and see” you grin, lowering yourself into your car.

“Ughhh” she groans, getting in her own car. You turn and give her a wink through the window as you reverse out of the garage, and you catch her rolling her eyes. You honk loudly at her, and she winds the window down.

“I better not have just seen you rolling your eyes at me missy”, she smiles guiltily but proudly, “Alright then, no more celebratory sex for you” You give her a smug grin and wind your window up.

“No baby wait!” Her calls fall on deaf ears as you roll out the driveway.

-

You text Leah the address once you arrive at work, along with some teasing words. The address included just the street name, and you had told her to meet you in the car park, still wanting the element of surprise for your final destination.

Your day flies by and before you know it, it’s time to leave for the restaurant. You had booked in Leah’s favourite, it was a 6-month waiting list and a lot of sweet talking, but you knew it was all worth it for your girl. After dinner, you planned to take her to the place you two first met, a local pub in Milton Keynes. You first encountered the blonde when you and your best friend were forced to share the dart board with her family, and it all skyrocketed from there. You thought it’d be a nice idea to take her back there, even though the two of you regularly went with Leah’s mum, you thought it’d be a special idea for today, just the two of you.

You changed into the outfit you had brought to work. A long black dress, with a slit down the side of the right thigh. It was Leah’s favourite dress of yours, and every time you wore it, it always ended up being almost ripped to shreds by her at the end of the night. You jumped in the car and quickly texted Leah, “Leaving now xx” before driving off. When you arrived at the restaurant you checked your phone to find your message unread. You didn’t worry too much, assuming she must have been driving on her way. You waited a while longer however there was still no sight of the blue-eyed girl. It was nearing a couple of minutes past your reservation when you decided you were going to have to go into the restaurant, knowing you’d lose the booking otherwise. Once you were seated at the table, you checked your phone—still nothing. You decided to call her, however, the phone rang out to her adorable voicemail that she hadn’t changed in 6 years.

After another 30 minutes passed and all you received was radio silence from Leah you began to worry. You knew she wouldn’t intentionally stand you up, you had been together for three years for god's sake. So, with that in mind, worrying thoughts began to run through your head. Had she been in an accident? Stabbed? God where the fuck is she! After being told by the hostess that you had already occupied an hour and a half of your two-hour booking you decided to call some of the Arsenal girls as they would’ve been the last to see her.

“Y/n? Is everything okay?”

“Lia! Oh, thank God! I’m sorry to disturb you but I was meant to meet Leah over an hour ago and I haven’t heard from her. Do you have any idea where she is?” You rambled into the phone, receiving a few strange looks from the surrounding tables.

“Oh um, Leah!” she called out,

“Yeah?” you heard your girl on the other end of the phone,

“Y/n is on the phone; you were meant to meet her?” Lia responds,

“Fuck fuck fuck shit fuck!” Is all you hear, and you can instantly tell the Milton Keynes twang in her cuss. “Baby god fuck I am so sorry, the girls were all going out for drinks and I completely lost track of time” She tried to reason through the speaker. Your worries instantly faded but anger fuelled inside of you. The phone bruised your hand as you gripped it.

“Where. The fuck. Are you?” You quipped, tight-lipped.

“Danny’s bar, babe I’m sor-“, you hung up on her not wanting to hear the pathetic reasoning for her absence. You hurriedly exit the restaurant, sincerely apologising, not before they pull you back and force you to pay a hefty fee for the time. You pay and angrily storm to your car, driving straight to the bar where Leah is. Once you arrive you stride in, instantly spotting or rather hearing the loud group of girls. Katie calls you over and you happily waltz towards her, still in your dress. You don’t spot Leah at the table.

“Your girl is at the bar” Katie slings an arm around your shoulder,

“I don’t care” you reply, taking her drink and chugging it down.

“Finally, someone who wants to have a bit of fun!” Katie exclaims, “I’ll get us some shots.” She winks.

“Put it on Leah’s tab” you shout after her as she heads to the bar. At the sound of her name, Leah turns around to find you sat at the table. Her eyes widen and fear washes over her face. She swallows and begins to walk over to you slowly. As she goes to sit down you all but look at her and slide your handbag to reserve the spot next to you, “taken”. You still refuse to face her. Leah knows better than to plead with you now, not wanting to make a scene, so she allows you to ignore her. She nods and walks around to the other side of the table, opposite you.

-

As the minutes ticked by, more alcohol went down your throat. You were slightly tipsy at this point. Leah had still not spoken to you, as you refused to acknowledge her, but you could feel the burn of her eyes on you all night.

Before you knew it, everyone was starting to twinkle their way out, tipsy goodbyes being shared around. Leah, who had still not quipped a word, followed you to your car. Having been driven there by Lia, and also knowing you’d had far too much to drink to drive yourself.

You both walked silently towards the car, you with an extra rage in your step. When you made it to the door you pulled out your keys. The car squeaking noises back and forth as you kept locking and unlocking the car. Leah grabbed your hand to help, and you pulled away, hard. “Baby just let me help you unlock the car”, she pleaded.

“One, don’t call me that. Two, I don’t need help.” You scoffed, continuing to tumble with the buttons. Leah sighed, not bothered to argue with you. Once you finally got the car unlocked you headed to get into the driver’s seat before Leah grabbed your wrist to stop you.

“Oh no no, you’re not driving” She states.

“What? Why?” you reply, outraged.

“Because you’ve had too much to drink, go to the other side”. You huff, sulking to the passenger side of the car.

-

The beginning of the drive was silent, until your mind began to sober up, and begin wondering.

“You can sleep on the couch” You quipped to Leah.

“What! Why?” She squeaked back.

“Why do you think!?” You began to raise your voice. Leah pulled over to the side of the road, knowing this could get a little messy.

“Y/n, I’m sorry, It just completely slipped my mind, I completely forgo-“

“You forgot? You fucking forgot?! Are you shitting me right now Leah?” You scream at her, hands out.

“Baby I’m sor-“she tries.

“No! You don’t get to call me that right now. Just drive.” Leah sighed and pressed down on the pedal.

-

When you returned home, you marched upstairs, slamming the bedroom door. Leah remained downstairs and sighed at your loud actions. She knew she fucked up and she also knew she wouldn’t get out of this one easy. So, she began assembling everything she’d need to make it up to you.

-

“Baby?” Leah knocked softly at your bedroom door. She was met with silence. “Baby? Can I come in?”. Silence again. Leah decided to softly open the door. Attempting to squeeze through, but struggled due to her current clothing, and accidently pushed the entire door wide open.

She stood there, a little embarrassed, head to toe in a pumpkin costume, flowers in hand, and a small trolley that looked like she had stolen from her little cousin behind her. She smiled softly and awkwardly. You had to stifle back a laugh, covering it with a small cough at the sight. You remained silent.

“I’m sorry, I really am” she whispers. “Let me make it up to you?” she smiles softly, lifting the flowers. You couldn’t stay mad at her little face enclosed in her pumpkin hat. So, you softly nodded and smiled. She smiled brightly and practically ran to you.

-

You both lay in bed naked, sat up against the headboard, Leah’s costume tossed on the floor, her arms around you, your back to her front. The trolley of food is empty, and the smidges of melted chocolate are still visible on both your bodies. “You’re a twat you know?” You turn your neck slightly to turn up and look at her. She smiled down at you.

“I know” she frowns.

“But you’re my twat” you smile. She laughs at your absurd and cheesy words.

She leans into your lips softly smiling, “That I am”.

-

A/n: First time writing in a few months! Hopefully this is okay and everyone enjoyed :)

As always, kind feedback, along with any questions, discussions, and convos are always welcome in my inbox!

[hansolsfearofbugs]

Skz- Before he Confesses

little things they do while they have a crush on you, sfw

maknae line edition- Han, Felix, Seungmin, Jeongin

hyung line

Han Jisung

tries extra hard to be funny when he's around you

always cracking jokes hoping it'll make you laugh

a little corny at times but still cute

overthinks every joke he made after he left

thinks you'll find him cringey and lowkey gets mad at himself over jokes he thinks were stupid

seeing you laugh makes it so worth it tho

the first time he ever made you laugh he was so happy

that was the moment he completely fell for you

spent the next few weeks daydreaming about having you all to himself so he could make you laugh like that all the time

always stealing glances at his phone when he shouldn't be (during practice, while recording, in meetings, etc) hoping to see a message from you

smiles like an idiot whenever he does get a notif from you

has a photo album of pics of you that he really likes

some of them are candids that he took and some are stolen from your social media

gets lost in your eyes a lot

will literally zone out just admiring you while you're talking

this gets him caught by the members becasue you're the only person they've ever seem him look at like that

Felix

tries to impress you by acting tough and showing off

pulls out the extra deep voice around you

fails at acting tough and it's adorable

like one time when you were watching the members play some sports game he went full try hard mode and all the members were really confused

does the thing where he'll wipe his sweat with the bottom of his t-shirt, purposefully showing off his abs in front of you

always sits near you in group settings

gets sleepy around you because he feels safe when he's with you

when he gets tired he forgets he's supposed to be acting tough to impress you

ends up just being really cute and clingy

falls asleep on your shoulder a lot on drives and when his social battery is drained at group events

always bringing you things he's baked

won't let the members touch the batches he makes just for you

brings you back little things from all the places he travels

befriends your mom with his baking

is so so so happy when your mom says she wants you to marry "a guy like him"

Kim Seungmin

i feel like a lot of people say he would tease you a lot if he likes you

but i actually think he'd be exceptionally nice to you

like you're literally the only one he's not an absolute menace to

gets caught so quick by the members because no one has ever seen him be so sweet to someone

lowkey protective over you

you fell asleep in a common area once and he guarded you like his life depended on it

would not let anyone speak or make noise

gave anyone who waked past the nastiest side eye

won't let you walk on the inside of the road

puts his hand over you when the car stops suddenly

pretended to be your boyfriend when a creepy guy wouldn't leave you alone

remembers everything you've ever said to him

you complimented his smile once and he couldn't stop thinking about it

always scheming to "accidentally" create situations where you're hanging out just the two of you

shares his food with you

you are the only one that gets that privilege

Yang Jeongin

gets jealous when he sees you having fun with other members but doesn't do anything about it cuz he doesn't think you'd ever choose him

lowkey has hella rizz but doesn't realize it

does little things to try subtly show you that he'd be a good boyfriend

like he'llfind a flower and tuck it behind your ear

"beautiful, just like you"

or he'll cook your favorite meals to show you that he's boyfriend material

saw you playing with some little kids and his heart absolutely melted

always asks to share your airpods so he can listen to your music

gets really shy and nervous if he sees you looking at him

always looking to make sure you're safe and having fun in group settings

finds excuses to touch you by fixing your jewery or moving your hair out of your face

plays with your claw clips all the time

something about claw clips are just absolutely mesmerizing to this man

tries extra hard with the vocals when he knows you're in the audience

he's singing his heart out just for you :)

a/n: if you enjoyed this check out the hyung line version!

[xoxoavenger]

Coward

pairing: Luke Castellan x Fem!Reader

summary: Luke goes out of his way to prove to Annabeth he's not a coward (requested by messages for my birthday celebration but I changed the request a lil bit)

word count: 595

warnings: sooo much fluff

birthday celebration (even tho my birthday was a couple days ago) main masterlist

Luke's pretty sure there's something wrong with him.

"There's something wrong with you." Annabeth says as she stands next to him. He flinches with the bow in his arms, the arrow hitting the hay next to the target. He puts it down and turns to her, frowning.

"Please, bestow upon me your wisdom." He snarks, even though he had just been thinking the same thing. He knows that Annabeth knows he's lying, but he would rather shoot himself in the foot than admit his problem.

"Really, Luke?" She has her arms crossed, and the two stare each other down in silence as everyone begins to leave. Neither speaks until everyone has begun the trek to the pavilion.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Luke lies, copying her stance.

"Come on!" Annabeth cries, outraged at her brother's stubbornness. "She likes you back, so why are you being such a coward?" They begin to walk to the pavilion for dinner at a slow pace so they can talk.

"Oh my gods." Luke rolls his eyes, annoyed now that he's being called a coward. "We don't know that she likes me, first of all, and even if we did know that she liked me, we don't know if she wants a relationship."

"Luke," Annabeth groans, resisting the urge to run a hand down her face.

"Annabeth, I don't want to talk about this." Luke is starting to get peeved as well, and this conversation is clearly getting nowhere.

"Because you're a coward." Annabeth teases, and Luke thinks he may explode.

"I am not a coward." He seethes as they come up to the pavilion. Annabeth just won't let it go, however.

"Really? Because refusing to ask out a girl that clearly likes you seems pretty cowardly to me." Annabeth knows what she's doing, but Luke is too angry to see through her plan.

"Fine!" Luke explodes, turning to her. "You think I'm a coward? Would a coward do this?" He stomps toward Y/N's table, where her back is to him. He's a little amped up, his heart racing, so he feels smooth as he leans on the table in between her and her sibling.

"Luke?" She mutters, shocked that he was suddenly right next to her. Their faces were right next each other, and her heart was racing with the proximity.

"Y/N," He smiles, and she melts just a little bit. "I was wondering if you wanted to go to the beach with me after dinner?" In the moment were they're just staring at each other he starts to lose his nerve. Maybe he is cowardly.

"I'd love to." She answers quietly, feeling her cheeks heat up. He nods, winks, then leaves, listening to her siblings start to gush over the interaction.

"Think I solved your problem." Annabeth is smirking smugly as he walks past her, and he pauses as he realizes that her plan all along had been to push him hard enough to finally ask Y/N out.

"You conniving little-"

"You asked her out, didn't you?" She still looks just so happy, and if Luke wasn't also happy from his upcoming date he would probably tell her to meet him at the sparring mats.

"Told you I'm not a coward." He says, getting in line for food.

"Yeah, you really showed me." Annabeth can't herself, and Luke just takes a deep breath, because he loves his sister. "Except really, I'm the one who showed you."

Luke may have to throw Annabeth into the ocean before he goes on his date. Just to prove he's not a coward.

//

tags: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187  @one-sweet-gubler

[privitivium]

hihi :3

okay so I'm kinda obsessed with dog hybrid!reader, (and yes this is going to be a teacher/student the g why wouldn't it be?) so like we get a question right our tail wags, talkin with a buddy: tail wags, talking with Teacher? tail wagging so much ommgg dont get me wrong tho as much as i love dog hybrids and stuff i strongly dislike the petnames pup & puppy. so if/when u do this request i ask u steer clear of those PLEASE....(mutt, dog, hound idc)

so scene is maybe we're hangin out with him whether or not his break, after, before school etc etc, perhaps we already have this 'on the down low' relationship and he gets frisky one day and wants to play with us heheh, maybe like grabbing our tail or ears (or petting, and yes "sensitive ear+tail trope is in the room) and moral of the story is maybe he makes us cum without touching our dick (ie tail, tails, nips, neck even?)

sorry its so long dude 😭, love ur drabbles !!

— 🍸

me w cat hybrid dudes.... no worries, thank you for kind words.... both amab, cw for good boy/sweet boy, teacher/student relationship - 18/23, reader has sensitive dog ears and tail.

dom teacher/sub doghybrid reader

at his house on a weekend... or just before school at his desk. it was a bit routine, already having an ongoing loving relationship with his darling little dog boy... so excitable and so easy to manipulate. playing with your body damn near whenever he fucking pleased - you were just so happy to provide pleasure, weren't you? it's a miracle that he loves you as much as you love him. jerking off to the sounds of your whimpers of your own orgasm over messages. sending pictures of himself messy with cum all over his abdomen - saying it was all because of you,,,. and even routinely teasing you throughout the day. he couldn't help himself-! passing you and giving your ears a soft scratch before continuing down the hallway and leaving you to shrink in embarrassment as your pants grow tighter. always having to keep a huge hoodie on standby...

so, merely soaking in each other's presence. sitting at his desk and watching so intently as he fiddles on his computer; your tail wagging so ferociously, so clearly happy to be around him. he hums softly at the quiet sound of your tail fwipping back and forth... taking a brief moment to admire you as you watch the screen - he couldnt help himself... reaching over to stroke along the furry tendrilㅡhe thinks it's obvious what he wants. heat pooling to his crotch at the memories of you hollowing around his prick - accidental, truly!! he didn't mean to get all horny, man, it's just the natural effect you have on him... it's your own fault... muscle memory and all.

it was just so fucking cute to him. you were too obvious. and you didnt even know it! waving your hand in greeting as your tail whips behind your back at lightning speed... having to act all nonchalant with him, but you couldnt quite control the way your tail fwips back and forth unrelenting... you- you just need to have a little emotional training is all... absentmindedly petting you - very much conscious of the soft little pants leaving your lips - all hot n heavy so suddenly? was it him? his touch? so predictable... he's glad.

"so sweet..." he had the gall to mumble, grinning widely as he tugs you gently to sit on his lap - helping you slide off the desk. so eager to follow orders and sit on his thighs - fangs poking out from your toothy smile. back propped against the edge of his desk... and erection prominent. humming softly, unfazed by the sight of his prized, precious students' bulge that was the product of his teasing. "let's give it some air." he suggests, slowly unzipping your jeans. your head bobbing up and down ecastatically - your eyes nearly glazing with tears of excitement - christ.

you were so much thicker than he was... your half-hard cock dribbling pre and you were breathing so heavily - feeling his own bulge against your ass. he was jealous - damn your genes... but- it was so lovely to tease. and... he'd make quite the show of doing the opposite of that. hands dipping underneath your shirt - careful not to graze your cock... hand reaching up and rubbing along the inner of your ears. tongue nearly lulling past your lips at his affection... just so fucking cute.

your tail nearly defying logic with how speedily it fwips... pulling you forward and reaching back just to tug your tail into view. fluidly stroking it... a soft hum leaving his throat at your closed eyes and furrowed eyebrows... lips parted as he cruelly ignores your aching prick weeping like a broken fountain that needed maintence. so soft... he couldnt help losing himself as he gently pets you - so lovingly... knowing what exactly to make you fidget and squirm on his lap... his hand leaving your tail - just to push your shirt up. revealing your chest ,,, your puffy, hardened nipples he takes no time to abuse. rubbing and pulling... head dipping in the crook of your neck and gently kissing... sucking as he moves back to fondle your tail.,,,

ㅡwith a low whimper escaping your saliva glossy lips - the coiling of your lower intestines - the fluttering feeling of his fingertips ghosting over your overtly sensitive nipples - you just couldn't h-hold backㅡ"ah,,, and look at that..." his voice,,, mumbling. in a trance, as he watches the overflow of cum dribble from the slit of your cockhead with admiration - all that, without touching your prick... so sensitive. you must like him a whole lot, huh? or maybe, you were just that easy,,,

[shittyassffblog]

Free Bird

Noah Sebastian x Reader

I felt horny as shit and couldn't stop myself so here is some smut with Noah <3

Warnings: P in v sex, use of Y/N, best friend!noah, oral sex

Pt 2 here

"And you can take your lame ass excuses and shove them up your ass! We're done! Goodbye!" You hung up and threw your phone on your bed, emitting a loud, frustrated and high pitched groan. You heard your PC ping on your desk and you glanced at it to see what was going on. It was Discord that alerted you that you had a message.

noah: wanna come on?

You stared at it, kind of angry that he didn't anticipate that you had just broken up with your boyfriend, but the rational part of you spoke louder and decided to just tell him you weren't in the mood.

you: naw, bad day. talk to u later tho <3

He was already typing so you sat in your chair and waited for his reply.

noah: at least call me and tell me what happened, maybe I can make your day better?

You bit your lip as you considered his offer. He was your best friend since you met at the Hot Topic you used to work at. He was just a tall, lanky emo buying A Day To Remember merch and you instantly had a connection with him. Since then, you started being friends and talking to each other every day. It's been 10 years now and you meant the world to each other. You had supported him through everything when it came to Bad Omens and you were so proud of how far he and the boys have come. So given how close you were you decided to just call him.

You put on your headset and glanced in the mirror beside your desk to see if it was noticeable that you'd been crying and decided that it wasn't. Not even five seconds passed after you pressed the "video call" button and he picked up.

"Hey sweets, what's up? Wanna talk about your bad day?" Noah asked and you sighed. You didn't even know where to start.

"Me and Chase broke up." You said shortly and Noah was silent for a while.

"Oh. Are you okay?" He asked in a low voice. Noah never liked your boyfriend and you knew that. You were half expecting him to clap in enjoyment.

"Not really. I was kind of expecting you to congratulate me." You said, still not looking at him.

"Why would I do that? You don't seem like this was a happy choice." He said.

"I broke up with him. But he cheated." You said and a tear fell down your cheek.

"God he's such a dick. But good for you that you left him. That doesn't mean that you're not allowed to be upset by it though." Noah said and you looked at him with tearful eyes. You were about to answer him when you heard a loud noise coming from him.

"Alright that's it, I'm coming over." He said, slamming his fist in his table.

"But it's 11 pm?" You said, almost as a question.

"Yeah well my best friend is sad over her shitty ex boyfriend, you don't think that warrants me coming over with pizza and booze? C'mon, what kind of a friend would I be? I'll be there soon. Love you!" He said and hung up before you could answer You sighed as the silence settled in your room and you looked around. You noticed Noahs hoodie hanging on your lamp and you decided to put it on. You walked into your bathroom to access the damage of your tears and found that it wasn't too bad. You wiped away a few stray tears with your sleeve and walked into your living room, seeing a few of your ex' stuff lying around. You grabbed a box from you last amazon shipment and filled it with everything you could find, including the stupid Five Finger Death Punch t-shirt he had given you, thinking you'd like it. As if. He didn't even know the bands you listened to.

Amid your rage cleaning, you heard the doorbell ring and you stopped as you dropped a shoe into the box. You looked at it and the memories of your past relationship came flooding back, as did your tears. You went to let Noah in and he immediately went to hug you.

"I'm so sorry you're going through this." He said and kissed the top of your head as the hood of his hoodie fell down. You cried into his chest and he rubbed his hand along your arm.

After a while he lead you to the couch and set down the pizza and beer bottle he had picked up for you on the coffee table.

"Wanna tell me what happened? How did you find out?" Noah asked, separating from you to wipe away your tears.

"She fucking DM'ed me. The girl he was with, her name was Emily or something. She had slept with him and then found him on Facebook to find that it said he was in a relationship and decided to tell me about it and apologised. Of course i don't blame her, she didn't know. But man, it just felt like a knife in my gut." You said, sniffing. Noah grabbed a napkin from the coffee table and handed it to you to help you blow your nose.

"Then did you call him?" Noah asked, taking the pizza out of the bag so you could use the bag as a trash can your your snotty paper.

"Yeah and I spent like 20 minutes yelling at him. He tried saying something like she was lying or something but she had sent me screenshots of him asking to pick her up or something." You finished and Noah sighed, pulling you in for another hug.

"He's isn't worth your tears c'mon. You're far too good of a catch to let a guy like that ruin you." Noah said and you smiled up at him. The doorbell rung again and you looked at Noah quizzically. He got up and opened the door for you. It was Chase. You felt your whole body stiffen.

"Oh you have got to be kidding me." Noah said, immediately tensing his body. Chase only laughed when he saw Noah, and then looked over at you.

"Really Y/N? Not even an hour later and you're already on to the next one? Knew I couldn't trust you, fucking bitch." He said and before you could answer, Noah had pushed Chase out the door.

"Yeah you don't get to make accusations you know nothing about. I think you should leave." Noah said, his words and tone calm but his body ready for whatever Chase could come up with.

"I knew there was more to this...thing, you and her call a friendship, so much for the bro code huh?" Chase said, trying to upset Noah.

"Don't think for a second I think of you as a bro. Not for one damn second. It is very easy to treat a woman right without expecting something in return and you couldn't even do that so leave." Noah said, pushing Chase once more. You couldn't do much but watch as everything happened. You were frozen.

"You're just gonna sit there looking stupid? What's wrong with you bitch, say something!" Chase yelled, charging forward towards you but was stopped in his tracks as Noah grabbed a handfull of his hair and dragged him outside. You ran to the door to see what was going on and Noah forced Chase down on the ground, got down on one knee and grabbed his throat.

"You leave her alone. Got it?" Chase nodded weakly and as soon as Noah let go and stood up, he ran as fast as he could. Noah walked quickly into the living room, grabbed the box of Chase's things and threw them after him.

"Don't think about coming back." He yelled and watched as Chase pathetically picked his stuff up from the ground. Noah walked back to you, taking a deep breath to calm down and grabbed your face.

"Are you okay? Did he always talk to you like that?" He asked calmly and you nodded.

"He has anger issues." You said meekly and Noah wrapped you in his arms.

"Let's devour that pizza now, shall we?" Noah asked and you smiled at him as you nodded.

"Didn't know you were that strong though." You said, trying to lighten the mood.

"I may or may not have been working out while I was on tour." He said flexing his arms playfully. You laughed as you sat down to enjoy the pizza.

--

A few days passed and you were doing surprisingly well. Noah was practicing for the next leg of the tour and you were setting up dating profiles. You decided that you needed a palate cleanser to get rid of the "chase cooties" as Noah called it when he suggested you try it. You were apprehensive at first but ultimately decided it was a good idea.

You were in your kitchen waiting for your leftovers to heat up in the microwave as you were swiping on tinder. No one really captured your eye except this one guy with a dragon tattooed on his neck. His name was Steven and he was not far from you. You decided to swipe on him, and not long after your microwave dinged so you locked your phone and went to eat it. As you sat by your counter and ate your food, a notification came up that Steven had matched with you. Not long after he sent you a message.

Steven: Hey, nice tats. Wanna grab a drink this week?

You stared at the message. No emojis. He had two pictures on his profile, but it linked to his instagram. You looked through and he seemed real enough so you said yes to the drink.

You planned to meet the following friday and you texted Noah to let him know where you'd be in case something happened.

Noah: go get em tiger! get ur dick wet!

You laughed at his message and sent a gif saying 'disgustang'.

Friday came and you were getting dressed for your date. You put on some dark red lipstick and a low cut top Chase never allowed you to wear and headed out the door. You felt very liberated that you could make your own choices again and happily waited for Steven a few blocks away from your apartment.

Not long after a black sports car Xoomed up to your and packed right in front of you. A very attractive man with a dragon on his neck emerged from the car.

"Y/N?" He asked and you nodded. He walked around the car and grabbed your hand to kiss it. "Pleasure to meet you, gorgeous." he said and you blushed.

"Likewise." You said and he smiled while opening the car door for you.

Not long after you arrived at the bar and he ordered you a drink and a beer for himself. You talked for a while and had a genuinely good conversation. You went to the bathroom and texted Noah an update and he sent a sports gif of a tiger mascot. You laughed and put your phone in your pocket, ready to get out the guy again.

When you came back, Steven started asking you some personal questions. At first you didn't think much of it, but the question got more and more sexual and you were feeling quite uncomfortable. When you answers got more and more short and cold he started berating you, asking why you were such a prude and generally being a dick to you.

"Do you think you just get free drinks and then that's it? No no, you gotta do something for me too sweetheart." He said and you picked up your phone, texting Noah to come get you.

"You don't seem like a very nice person." You said, finishing your drink and locking eyes with the bartender. He nodded at you, meaning he would keep an eye on you.

"I'm very nice, trust me, but only to nice girls, not gold diggers like you." He bit back and you put on your jacket. You didn't answer him, only stared at him.

"What you're just not gonna say anything?" He asked and you still didn't answer. The bartender came over.

"Hey so I think you should leave now." Said the bartender and Steve looked up at him like he was dumb.

"You can't kick me out, I didn't do anything." He said, rolling his eyes and looking back at you.

"Yes we can , we have the right to refuse service to anyone for any reason. So leave." He said back and you started to feel scared of what Steven would do.

"Let me speak to your manager." said Steven and the bartender agreed. Steven got up and went to the bar, and while he was arguing with the bar manager you slipped out, waiting for Noah. Just as you got outside, he pulled up and you got into the car,

"Hey sweets, how was it?" Noah teased and you rolled your eyes.

"Horrible, he was a giant dick." You said, grabbing the water bottle Noah brought for you. You took a giant gulp of it.

"What do you mean?" Noah asked as he drove you home.

"He was just horrible, I don't really wanna talk about it. " You said, and he nodded, respecting your privacy, You would talk about it when you wanted to.

"Don't let this one guy deter you from online dating though. It can be really fun you know." Noah said and you scoffed.

"Yeah for guys maybe." You said coldly and Noah glanced at you. He knew you didn't mean anything by it.

"Wanna elaborate?" He asked and you sighed.

"Well it's just, for guys it's fine, you can just order women to do what you want and if they don't want to it's on to the next one and then you put your dick in them and then that's that. For women it's like, if I reject this guy, will I be dead by the time the sun comes up?" You said huffing. Noah nodded in understanding.

"I mean I know that's a real fear that women have and that sucks a lot, but there must be a space where you can have fun too right?" He asked carefully. He didn't want to seem like he wasn't empathetic to your pain, but he still wanted to help you get over your ex.

"Yeah with a person you trust sure. But online dating is a rapists wet dream." you said. "And even then, sex isn't even worth that much."

Noah looked at you quizzically. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I just never felt that big climax that people talk about. I guess my orgasms aren't very intense when I have sex." You said and Noah looked questioningly at you while still keeping an eye on the road.

"Well what about when you're alone?" He asked and you looked at him. Might as well be honest now, you thought.

"Yeah then I feel great, but when I'm with someone it's like it's just there a little, then it gets kind of good but then they're done." You said shrugging your shoulders. Noah let out a noise you had never heard before.

"You never had anyone give you an orgasm?" Noah asked incredulously.

"Well I don't know. Maybe?" You said. "I've only ever been with Chase." You said. And Noahs eyes were bigger than you've ever seen them before. You were arriving at your house and he put the car in park.

"What about when he ate you out?" Noah asked, genuinely curious.

"Chase thought it was gross. Don't you?" You asked, turning your body a little. He looked at you like you were crazy.

"What?" You asked.

"I love eating pussy, it's my favourite passtime!" He said and you laughed.

"What do you mean? Does it even taste good?" You asked and he nodded wildly

"Yeah I mean it depends a lot but generally yeah I like the taste." Noah said.

"Well, Chase never liked it so we didn't do it." You said, crossing your legs. Noah chuckled a little.

"He really was a little bitch huh. You deserve someone who loves eating your pussy." He said, grabbing your leg, like he'd done many times before, but this time it was different. This time his hand shot electricity up your thigh, making you squirm a little in your seat.

"Would...Would you show me?" You asked and his grip on your thigh tightened. You glanced a little at him and you could see his jaw tightened.

"I uh..I don't know if that's a good idea Y/N." He said and you looked at him properly. He wouldn't meet your eyes, but his hand stayed where it was.

"C'mon Noah. I've clearly missed out on a lot. Show me." You asked, getting closer to him. You didn't know where all this confidence came from, or why you wanted your best friends mouth on you so bad, but you did. He turned to look at you, but his eyes were trained on your lips. He let out a shaky breath and let go of your leg. You leaned back, afraid you had upset him or made him uncomfortable, but he was taking off his seat belt.

"I'll show you. But just this once, I don't wanna ruin our friendship. And we don't mention it to anyone." He said and you grinned, unbuckling your own seat belt and got out of his car. You already felt yourself getting excited.

"Wow you are really horny huh?" Noah said as he locked the car, holding out his arm to wrap it around your shoulder as he walked you inside. You unlocked the door and led him to your bedroom.

As you closed the door, he sat himself on the bed. You sat beside him and a kind of awkward silence fell between you. You felt like you kind of sobered up by the reality of what you had asked your best friend to do.

"If this is gonna ruin our friendship we could just forget it or something." You said, not meeting Noah eye. He looked at you for a moment not answering.

"We could also just agree to not let it ruin our friendship. This is a one time thing, to show you what you should expect from guys that you date in the future, and to get to know each other better." Noah said, and you were surprised he seemed to have thought this through.

"That doesn't sound too bad." You said, looking down at your hands. He reached over and held one of them, squeezing it to make you look at him.

"I love you, Y/N. I want to keep being friends so this will just be two people having fun for a night and then never doing it again, right?" He asked with a sweet smile and you nodded. He smiled a little wider and before you knew it, he was leaning in, closing his eyes in the process.

"Woah what are you doing?" You said, pulling away. He opened his eyes and looked at you quizzically.

"Well I need to turn you on before we begin, only way I know how to do that is to kiss you first, is that okay?" He asked softly. When he said it, it makes sense. But no one ever did this with you. Cared for your pleasure like this. It was different.

"Y-yeah, that's umm...that's okay." You stuttered out, and he smiled again, this time moving closer to you and lightly grabbing your chin with his thumb og index finger. You let yourself relax and Noah do what he wanted to. He seemed to know best. When his lips touched yours it was light and soft, yet had passion. Like he wanted something you didn't know to give him, and it was his job to pull it from you. You kissed back, and before you knew it, his tongue was in your mouth. You had thought about kissing Noah before, but this was way different than what you had imagined. Good different, but different.

His hand on your chin fell to your neck, tracing down your arm and landed itself on your waist. He pulled, as if to get you to move closer. Already this was way better than what you had experienced before, Noah clearly knew what he was doing. You wondered where he had learned it, but decided to not ask. This was too nice.

A soft moan fell from his lips and you were brought back from your train of thought. His lips left yours and for a second you thought about whining, but when his lips attached to your jaw, right below your ear and then your neck, that whine quickly turned into a moan.

"Sensitive on your neck?" He asked and you let out a breathy sound that was supposed to be a laugh. He went right back to kissing your neck, teeth getting involved sometimes and the moans that were falling from your lips were fewer between.

"Can I take your shirt off?" Noah asked and you nodded. He smiled and grabbed the hem of your shirt, lifting it up over your head. "It's a shame though." He said, eyeing up your chest.

"What is?" You asked, kind og dazedly.

"Taking your shirt off. You looked really good in it. Why don't you ever dress like that for me?" He asked smirking while laying you down on your back, leaning over you.

"Well I don't make it a habit of sleeping with my best friend." You said smiling slightly.

"You should, he's enjoying it so far." He joked and you laughed while he kissed you between your breasts. "Can I take off your bra too?" He asked, looking up at you. His voice was low, which only made this all the more enticing. You nodded slowly, laying your head back to try and think of something else besides your best friend looking at your tits. You lifted your back little so he could fit his arm under it and unclasp your bra. He slowly guided the straps down your arms, a soft groan emitting from his lips.

"Goddamn, if I knew you were hiding these under your baggy hoodies we would have done this a long time ago." Noah said, and you laughed a little.

"Yeah cause when we met at 14 my tits were definitely this size, right." You joked, but your sentence ended with a gasp as his lips closed around one nipple while his hand massaged the other. He was soft about it all, like licking a soft serve ice cream. It caused you to mewl, which Chase could never have done to you. It was like Noah knew how to handle your body, without ever asking you.

"Kinda wanna think about your adult tits right now if you don't mind?" He said as he shifted to the other nipple. You chuckled at that and let him do his thing. He moved on to your stomach and when he reached the edge of your pant he stopped and looked up at you yet again asking, "Is this okay? can I take your pants off?" You nodded and lifted your ass, his slender, tattooed fingers grasping the edge of your pants and pulling them down, kissing just above the edge of your underwear.

"These too?" He asked and you laughed a little.

"You gonna ask every time you do something new?" You asked and he stopped what he was doing to look at you.

"Yes, how else do I know what I have consent for?" He asked.

"That is the hottest thing anyone has ever said to me ever." You said and he laughed.

"You gotta raise your standards babe." He said, going back to kissing the lower part of your stomach. "You gonna answer my question?" He asked, running his hands up and down your legs.

"I forgot what the question was." You said truthfully. He laughed as he rested his head again your hip.

"I asked if I could take off your underwear too." He said, and your heart started beating faster.

"Uh yeah. Yeah that's okay." You said. The seriousness of the situation was starting to settle in and you were kind of nervous. When he pulled off your underwear it would be crossing a line that has never been crossed before and it couldn't ever be uncrossed again. Noah could sense your hesitation so he stopped.

"If you wanna stop, tell me. It's no fun if you're not having fun." He said and you knew he meant it.

"No it's okay I'm just kind of nervous." You admitted and he came back up to your face.

"Hey. It's just me. It'll be okay." He said smiling and you smiled back, taking in a deep breath as he lowered his body again, kissing along your body as he did so. He grabbed the hem of your underwear and pulled them down. You were worried he would be repulsed by then smell of you, but when you looked down at him all you could see was hunger in his eyes. It made you feel better to know that he didn't care about the smell, so you tried to relax in his presence.

He kissed the inside of your thigh, grabbing them both and pushing up so you bend your knees. You felt very exposed, and you wished he would just get on with it.

"So pretty baby. Can't wait to taste you." He said and it made your stomach soar. Did he really not find it gross?

"You know, you don't have to do this either, like if it's too gross for you or something." You said, biting your lip. You wanted him to continue, but you understood if he didn't want to.

"I don't wanna stop. And nothing about this perfect pussy could be gross." He said, kissing up your other thigh. You took a deep breath and let him do as he pleased.

He kissed your pussy as if he was knocking for entrance, and spread your legs further. He then started at your clit, licking small, tentative licks as to not overwhelm you. When you sighed in pleasure he took that as a sign he could continue, and let his tongue wander down to your entrance and licked into you.

"Oh my god." You said, already it felt better than it has with anyone else. It seemed to urge Noah to go further, so he licked a big broad stripe up your pussy and you hummed.

"Oh Noah it feels so good." You said lowly and he smiled. A devilish smile, one that you felt was too cocky for his own good but you were struggling to care. He pleasured you with such patience, the tight feeling in your stomach building and building and you almost thought he was a magician, as fast as he was getting you worked up.

What you didn't expect was the finger that was circling your opening before entering you gently.

"Holy fuck, Noah." You said and he hummed a soft 'hmm?' as if asking what was the issue.

"Oh you make me feel so good Noah." You said and his finger slid into you further and further, stopping and then curling, reaching a spot inside you that made your whole body writhe. He was rubbing the spot, not letting one movement of his finger go without touching it.

"What the fuck Noah?" You asked, sitting half up as you grabbed his hair to keep yourself grounded. He detached himself from your pussy and smiled up at you.

"That feel good baby?" He asked, his eyelids hanging low on his eyes. You could do nothing but nod as the movements of his fingers didn't halt for even a second while he took at good look at you. He went back to your clit, this time sucking on it gently and making your hips buck up into his face. It only seemed to spur him on, as his movements sped up. You felt a familiar feeling coming and you tangled your fingers in Noah’s hair, pulling when he hit a particularly nice spot inside you.

“Noah, I’m so close.” You warned, and he sped up yet again, only he stopped sucking your clit and instead look at you through heavy eyelids, right into yours. You were a moaning mess, not being able to control it anymore as you came on his fingers, yelling his name out. He helped you through your orgasm and when you were panting for air he slowly pulled his finger out of you and made sure you saw him lick it clean. You couldn’t believe what just happened, your best friend just gave you the orgasm of your life.

“How in the hell did you do that?” You asked him, still not being able to catch your breath.

“Well practice makes perfect I guess” he said laughing. You laughed with him and he came up to lay beside you. A silence fell between you, but it wasn’t awkward. You were still coming down from your high and you noticed Noah shifting a little, seeming restless.

“You okay over there?” You asked and he looked at you with a little blush on his face.

“Well, I told you I love eating pussy” he said chuckling slightly as he readjusted himself in his shorts You considered your options. You could leave the room, pretend you had to pee and let him do his thing. Or…

“You want help with that?” You asked, turning to him. He looked at you, searching your eyes for any sort of insincerity, but he couldn’t find any. He nodded slowly and you smiled, reaching hesitantly over to kiss his lips. You tasted yourself on him, and you couldn’t imagine what Chase would have against the taste, it was not bad at all. You were taken by surprise when Noah wrapped his arms around you and pulled you on top of him, deepening the kiss.

“You are wearing far too many clothes.” You said between kisses and he hummed a sound of agreement. You pulled off his hoodie and went right back to kissing him, hungry for him in a way you never were for anyone else. He grabbed two handfuls of your ass, not caring if his grip left bruises on it, grinding you down onto the bulge in his shorts. It made you moan into his mouth, giving him an opportunity to push his tongue into your mouth. You grinded on him as your tongues pushed against each other, revelling in this new feeling with each other. It felt liberating, to not care where the line was or how far it was crossed.

"How do you wanna do this? Hm?" Noah asked, and you were confused by what he meant.

"What?" Was all you could muster out, being out of breath.

"Do you wanna have sex?" Noah asked directly this time and you thought about it for only a second before nodding wildly. He smiled at that and rolled you around, getting up from the bed to undress fully. You could not contain your stare, and you wanted to touch yourself so bad. He had clearly been working out on tour, his once lanky frame was replaced by the lean muscles of his arms, his legs were carved like a god and the tattoos definitely only made it better.

"Touch yourself for me." Noah said which brought you back to reality.

"What?" You asked, wondering if you had heard him correctly. He couldn't possibly mean that, right?

"If you're comfortable, then touch yourself for me. Want to see you pleasure yourself." He said as he pulled off his underwear. You didn't dare look, afraid it would make him uncomfortable so you looked at the ceiling as your hand travelled from your stomach down to your core. You ran your fingers along your clit in a circular motion and you felt the bed dip as he came to lay beside you.

"You're such a good girl Y/N. You really are. Look at you, doing exactly what I told you. Such a good girl." Noah whispered in your ear and it only made your fingers speed up.

"You have a condom sweetheart?" He asked and you pointed towards the nightstand you had by your bed. He turned around to grab one, and while we was distracted you took at look at his member and let out a moan you didn't mean to let out. He was big, bigger than Chase and you could barely imagine it would fit. You fingers stilled as your gaze was caught on his thick cock.

"What's wrong sweets?" Noah asked, rubbing his thumb along your thigh.

"Oh nothing uhh, nothing." You said, smiling at him. He could tell it wasn't nothing though.

"Hey, you can tell me, do you want to stop?" He asked, and you shook your head furiously.

"No! No no, I'm just, nervous I guess." You admitted, looking down. He turned to hug you and kissed your forehead.

"Nothing to be nervous about baby, it's just me." He said smiling.

"Will it fit though?" You asked sheepishly and his eyes shot to yours. You worried you had said something wrong.

"That is the hottest shit i've ever heard." He said, kissing your lips. You smiled into the kiss, your hands grabbing his face and letting the kiss overtake you. He rolled on top of you, slotting himself in between your legs, groping your body and worshipping the softness of your skin. He started grinding against your heat, pulling moans from your lips.

"God Noah, please do something." You whined and he smiled mischievously, kissing you one last time before sitting back on his knees and stroking his cock a few times before running it up and down your slit. This you knew how to do. This was familiar terretory. Or so you thought. He pushed into you slowly, relishing in the tightness of your pussy, and when he bottomed out, he let out a long groan, burying his face in your neck. You had never felt so cared for and filled to the brim with pleasure before. You were overwhelmed with emotion and felt tears spring to you eyes.

"You just tell me when I can move- hey are you okay?" Noah immediately changed demeanour when he saw your wet eyes.

"No yeah I'm good, really, I just...uhm I don't know why." You admitted and he smoothed down your hair to comfort you.

"Do you want to stop?" He asked and you shook your head, smiling at him.

"No it's okay, you can move. I promise I'm fine!" You assured him as he looked at you questioningly. He didn't seem convinced.

"I promise I'm fine Noah, I'm just a bit overwhelmed, no one ever took care of me like this before." You said, avoiding his eyes. He kissed your cheek.

"Okay, but you have to tell me if I have to stop okay? Can you promise that?" He asked, trying to catch your eyes. You nodded, and he smiled a comforting smile as he kissed your neck again.

"You can move." You said, and he pulled almost all the way out, only to slide right back in, in the same excruciatingly slow pace. You wrapped your legs around his lower back, boring your heels into him, desperate to have him fuck you senseless.

"Noah, please, c'mon." You plead and he chuckled.

"Tell me what you want baby." He murmured in your ear, his pace still as slow.

"Please fuck me Noah." You asked, looking him directly in the eyes. He looked back, and before long his hips picked up speed, pounding into you as you threw your head back in pleasure.

"Oh Noah!" You moaned, not caring how loud you were. If your neighbours heard, you'd hear about it in the morning. The sound of your moans only spurred Noah on, his thrusts relentless and his breath fast.

"Fuck Y/N. Fuck we're definitely doing this again." He said and you laughed breathlessly as you dug your nails into is back. He moved slightly and with that he started hitting a spot that felt incredible many times, over and over, eliciting screams from your throat.

"Holy fuck Noah, shit shit shit, fuck, oh fuck." You rambled and Noah kept up his thrusts, moving his hips back and forth. You could feel the feeling come back, the incredibly intense feeling in your core building and building, and before long your nails dragged along his back as you screamed out his name. Your pussy clenched around him and you couldn't hold back even if you tried. Your orgasm overflowed and wouldn't stop, you legs shaking as the intense waves of pleasure washed over you. Noah kept thrusting into you through your orgasm, and when you opened your eyes again he turned you around so he was under you.

"You okay?" He asked breathlessly and you nodded lazily.

"Yeah just...intense." You said smiling. "Did you..?" You asked.

"No not yet." He said smiling. "Are you okay to continue?" He asked.

"Yeah I'm okay." You said, moving your hips slowly. He grabbed your ass, holding onto you tight and lifting you a little and started pounding into you even more relentlessly. You could barely think straight as he used your pussy until he came into the condom, deep groan escaping his throat. His hips slowed down and he let you go, burying his now softening cock into you as he caught his breath.

"Holy shit Noah." You said out of breath ad he laughed.

"Was that okay?" He asked and you nodded, kissing him. You didn't know when would be the last time you got to kiss him like this again so you decided to enjoy as much as you could. He grabbed the base of the condom and told you to get off and you did. He removed the condom and wrapped it in some tissues you had on your nightstand, as well as wiping his dick. When he was done he looked over at you and smiled. You smiled back and you wrapped yourselves in each others arms, enjoying the bubble you two had created that no one could penetrate.

The morning after woke up alone, your clothes on the floor and a feeling of complete satisfaction, yet complete loneliness.

[hanjisungslag]

attack on titan headcanons #11

synopsis: when aot characters get drunk🍺

characters involved: eren, mikasa, armin, jean, connie, sasha reiner, bertolt, annie, levi, erwin and hange

notes: exams are finally over and its SUMMAA so i switched up my theme, rip coquette hanjisungslag u will b missed x

☆ eren jaeger

loves a strong bow and a corona on a warm summers day x

is a lightweight

one beer and he is off his rocker

gets hyper in several different ways, happy, giggly, angry etc.

passed out by 22:00

☆ mikasa ackerman

she’s a cider girlie!!

loves a remodelling & kopparberg (strawberry & lime and mixed fruits specifically)

tries some people’s gins and vodkas and it ain’t for her

she’s a lightweight too

she’s so shocked how hard it hits her

she’s a lot more chatty and giggly

goes red in the cheeks > <

☆ armin arlert

he tries beer. doesn’t like san miguel. hates stella.

will take a corona on a sunny day though…

but he likes a cider!

he looovveesss any fruity drinks

he’s not a lightweight or heavyweight, good middle ground

gets sooo chatty

the type of drunk to info dump on you / talk about their special interests

☆ jean kirsten

drinks mostly everything. strongbow, cider, maybe be cheeky and have a rum!

also tequila tbh

he’s a bit of a lightweight tbh

but he refuses to admit it 😭

he’s a chill drunk, he’ll sit and chat and drink

but bro is RAVENOUS like he will eat a fuckin buffet and a half afterwards.

spends more money on food than actual drink

☆ sasha braus

AH SHE LOVES A PITCHER FROM SPOONS X

her, ymir and historia deffo get some refreshing, fruity pitchers between em all.

they’re literally just girls… 😖

she’s a lightweight duhhh!!

she’s 100% busting a move on the dance floor

there’s also a liability.

and she is that liability. she is constantly running off

☆ connie springer

 MY GUY IS A VODKA MAN I SAID IT

he gets sooo drunk

like i’m talking running away with sasha, doing karaoke, dancing, chatting to EVERYONEE

THE no 1. yapper when drunk

by the end of the night he was 10 new best friends, invited to three weddings and several after parties.

he’s deffo the one who ends up being sick but he’s so ready to drink afterwards😭(don’t let him)

☆ reiner braun

heavyweighhhhttt

he starts off with ‘man’ drinks like san miguel, stella etc.

HOWEVAA i know this man loves a voddy and coke and gin.

i just know when this man is pissed and wants another one he is getting his bloody pink gin

he’s rizzing people up sooo hard like reiner stawp 😜

he’s so sweet and pookie when drunk like he’s just chatting and hugging all his friends

☆ bertolt hoover

actually loves a san miguel

everyone’s so surprised by this?

he’s also a heavyweight

he’s tall ok, more of him to get drunk

when he’s drunk HES A TALKERR

it’s like it’s all been built up and now he’s exploding with words and conversations

deffo says way too much for his liking and regrets it deeply in the morning.

expect an apology message in the morning (even tho he has nothing to apologise for, bless)

☆ annie leonhart

heavy weight

this girl is on vodkas with lemonade hmk x

when she’s drunk she’s soo red

she’ll find someone to just sit and chill with

doesn’t want to embarrass herself or bring attention to herself.

she’s so funny when she’s drunk

pulls out ALL the stops when it comes to jokes

she’s always giggling at everyone doing some dumb shit

☆ levi ackerman

heavy weight!

he doesn’t drink much anyways

but if he is, its whiskey or tia maria in some coffee

he’s usually the one watching everyone, not getting too drunk

making sure no one is dead x

but he always ends up tipsy at the least

although he’s supposed to be baby sitting

he cant help but slightly smirking at anything anyone says.

☆ erwin smith

heavy weight once again

doesn’t like to get too drunk

he’s an old man now cmon

my man is drinking wine like merlot, pino, etc

he’s so elegant when drinking

but by the end of the night his hair is messed up baddd

he says loads of stuff and regrets it.

obviously it’s nothing too extreme but just him being silly

gets super sleepy though. wine drunk 🙁

☆ hange zoë

SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS

literally adores shots

just goes crazy on them tbh

after an hour, they’re buying shots for EVERYOONNNEEE

definitely broke by the end of the night.

has to start giving themselves a limit every time they go out

ANYWAYS an absolute party animal

hitting up the clubs

hitting the DANCE FLOOR DUH!

[tuliptic]

So Much I Miss You

I miss you, even when you have not entered my life, I still miss you.

Guess what? We’re doing Mamamoo’s song this time. This is one of my faves from them and I feel like it would be great to do a reading based on it. I mean… I have not done PACs for quite a long time and am finally back a bit! Will proceed to do the rest but am suddenly in the mood to do a love reading so uhhh… Yeah…

Anyways, we all know the drill. Close your eyes, meditate on this topic and ask yourself the question: “Who is this potential romantic partner that has not entered into your life?” Breathe in and out, make sure your mind and heart is calm. Then, open your eyes to see which pile talks to you the most/draws you in the most. Once you’ve found your pile, scroll down to the respective parts to see what are the messages for you.

Pile 1    -     Pile 2

Pile 3    -     Pile 4

Disclaimer: This is solely for my entertainment purposes. Take only whatever that you feel like it. If it doesn’t resonate, it’s okay to just drop it. That aside, I do not consent to my work or here to be used by third parties on this platform or other websites.

Decks used: Luna Cat Tarot Deck (Major Arcana), Kawaii Tarot Deck, Sweet Dreams Oracle Deck, Starcodes Astro Oracle Deck, self made lyrics deck.

Pile 1:

Card of querent: The Chariot

I feel that you’re the type of person who’d be on your toes, knowing where you want to go and how you want to achieve. Constantly moving, constantly pushing yourself to grow. It feels like you’ve been letting the waves bring you along because you were tired or lost. But now you’re on land and you feel like you’re in your element, and now you’re riding the Chariot and redirecting your life to where you want to go, which kinda explains why you can be slightly gungho and excited, sometimes others may even view you as aggressive.

1. What type of relationship will we have? - Nine of Cups

I would say that the relationship is very fulfilling, something like a dream come true. I wouldn’t paint it in a fantasy, love story, happily forever kinda way tho. It’s like… There’s some sort of relief, that you finally met the other person and the other person finally has you in their arms. This person is someone who you’d consider having a marriage with, where you want to be together with them. The emotional fulfilment is very strong and there’s some sort of pampering with each other there.

2. How will I meet them? - The Fool rx

I feel that you will meet them when you’re not really ready for a romantic relationship. You’ll be focused on doing other things and have no time for love, but they’ll just appear there and for some reason, I feel that you may even want to push them away. There may be a conflict between your heart and mind, where your heart doesn’t want to fall for this person, but your brain is telling you that this is a suitable person to have a relationship with. There’s an oracle card here, Love, for you, allowing your heart to open to love as it manifests into the world.

3. What type of person are they? - The Magician rx

This person… I feel like there’s a lot in their head and they don’t really verbally express their thoughts. They may find it… Embarrassing? Like… They want to be pampered but they don’t think they deserve to ask but still they have that thought and the cycle goes on. Self-doubt and cloudiness in their mind as well. Tho I do not doubt the passion they have for you and the relationship you both share. They probably have some Fifth House placement as well.

4. How will I feel about them? - Five of Cups

I feel like… There’s gonna be some not so happy emotions here. It feels like your person will be coming at a time when you’re not feeling like yourself, and you’re not able to really… Enjoy and let yourself be free to accept your person. It’s like you want this person, but whatever situation you’re in is not helping you and you’re burdened with a lot of things, to the point that romantic love is at the back of your head. I think you might even have put interpersonal relationships aside to deal with whatever that’s happening to you. You know you have manifested them into your life and as much as you wanna appreciate them, you were unable to do so full-heartedly.

5. How will they feel about me? - Ten of Wands

Somehow I feel that they may feel tired. It’s like… They’ve tried to be by your side but things don’t seem like they’re working out. They might even feel like they’ve been taken advantage of. Tho I’m seeing this as temporary. Cuz feeling about it is one thing and understanding it is different. They understand that you’re going through hard times and they are determined to walk through this path with you. They may feel upset and all but they kinda put responsibility as their priority. 

But also, one thing I’m seeing is that they know that this is a period of transition and both of you are moving from the old to the new. Which is why they stand strong and stay in this relationship.

6. Our future together, what will they want from the relationship, etc. - Knight of Cups, Three of Cups, Nine of Pentacles

I’m seeing that they would want to build a future together, want the both of you to grow together, in wealth and in emotional fulfilment. I’m somehow picking up that either one of you, or maybe the both of you have been through not so nice childhood, which makes you crave for the emotional fulfilment, for the fairytale romance that’s always shown in the movies. It may sound too naive but I’m seeing that both of you will work towards that goal, wanting the love you both share to be as magical as it seems. And to achieve that, one will need a certain level of financial independence as well as abundance. You two fill in the missing pieces within each other and complete them, contributing equally in this relationship.

The relationship may start with some sort of mystery, but as you grow together, you explore the various aspects of a romantic relationship, finding which love language the other person responds to. I’m seeing that both of you will set some sort of goals and maybe visioning how the relationship will flourish. Love is an open door, and you can just step into the happiness that you’re meant to receive. They would want to wear happiness on your face and show you off to the whole world.

Overall energy: The Star, Page of Cups rx

I have to say something. Tho the cards may not look… good, I feel that the overall vibe and energy for the reading isn’t bad. Like… It shows the ups and downs of the relationship, and not everything has a fairytale ending. I feel that this is the combination of The Star and Page of Cups rx, where the reality is painted here. You two will need to work with your dreams and spirit’s energy to reach your highest good, and to know what’s the best for you. There’s a lot of transits I’m seeing, where you two progress and learn, tho there are times that y’all are content with where you are right now.

A reminder: this reading is not for your future spouse, but for a potential romantic partner who’s gonna enter into your life. So it’s perfectly alright if you do not resonate with this reading.

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Pile 2:

Card of querent: The Tower rx

First thought I’m getting is that you’ve been through A Lot. Each of us have been through a bunch of ups and downs in life, but what you’ve gone through is much more… Heavier than the rest. There’s a certain sadness, coldness, helplessness that you’ve experienced, which have affected your life in ways that you can’t explain. I’m seeing a lot of hysterical screaming and crying as well. This card being here is like… A message. A message to you that it’s not your fault that things have happened, that things have to be broken down only then it can be rebuilt.

1. What type of relationship will we have? - Ten of Swords rx

I’m seeing that this relationship that you guys will be sharing is something… Healing. I see this healing will be more towards a mental and emotional healing instead of a spiritual one. It feels like all the knives that are sticking at your back (you prolly may have been backstabbed by people you’ve trusted, and for some reasons I’m thinking it’s friends rather than lovers) are being pulled out, the wounds cleaned and treated. This relationship will give you the time, space and energy to heal, where they create and introduce peace, prosperity and joy in your life.

2. How will I meet them? - The Empress rx

I feel that you’ll meet them when you’re not feeling yourself. You have a lot of things going on in your life, and for some reason you’ll not see them as a potential romantic partner. It probably may be due to the betrayals you’ve just experienced and hence, losing faith in most things. Most, not all. Which made you put a distance between them and you. I have a feeling that you’ll also focus more on yourself and stop being self-sacrificial during those times, keeping things to yourself. A very introverted energy compared to how you usually are.

3. What type of person are they? - Eight of Swords rx

They prolly will be your type of person lol. They find solutions to problems and they give me the feeling that they’re capable of guiding you through your problems. You not only find a lover in them, but also a friend, a guide, someone who walks beside you and is ready to help you. I see that they’re also someone who will help you out from all and everything that’s restricting you, especially your past beliefs that have been pushed onto you ever since your childhood. They’re open minded, but not freely open kinda thing? They’re willing to try certain things up to a certain level, but still will opt for the safer option or something that they’re more used to. Like… Taking calculated risk but only for a period that they deem safe. Kinda thing. Comfort is a thing for them. Weirdly I’m feeling Taurus vibes lol.

4. How will I feel about them? - Queen of Wands

You will be attracted by their confidence and courage, a soft and graceful maturity that comes from it. I somehow see a soft glow that’s warm, like the dawn instead of an afternoon bright gaze kinda thing. I see that you may be an introvert and they would probably be slightly extroverted than you. Just… Slightly. Lol. But they are capable of socialising. Very good interpersonal skills, observant and can capture your thoughts easily. It feels like they’re someone who you want to be? With those skills and charisma. It’s like they’re a dream that you wanna achieve, and you find inspiration from them and thrive to improve yourself better. 

5. How will they feel about me? - Knight of Swords rx

I’m seeing that they are observant of you and are able to zoom in to the quiet power you hold, being firm with whatever beliefs you hold. Not to go uhhhh NSFW but I feel like they may feel morally challenged with you at times? They may be interested in some risque acts in places that don’t seem to be appropriate. They wanna try a lot of things with you, but will not push it when you say no. I’m also seeing some dominance here? They may also wanna feel that rush of adrenaline in the sense of “conquering” you. I hope I’m making sense with my words here.

6. Our future together, what will they want from the relationship, etc. - Knight of Wands, Four of Wands rx

They’ll want to go on adventures with you, grow with you and experience a lot of new and old things together. I’m seeing some travelling through memory lane kinda thing? Where you two constantly revisit certain comfort memories. You two may go on spontaneous trips together when you two are feeling like it, and you two complement each other’s energies well, working with one another’s dreams to reach the highest good of you two. Sometimes, you two may have some differing opinions, but you guys are able to look at things from different perspectives, from outside the box, and figure out how to solve the problems together. Tho not gonna lie, you two may have some over-spending from all those spontaneous trips, and will learn the lessons together. Whatever difficulties you two experience will make you two grow stronger, connecting your dreams to the next. Whatever tears you have right now will teach you the importance and preciousness of happiness, making you find the reason to live and love.

Overall energy:The Emperor, Six of Wands

The Emperor here gives me the “conquering” kinda feeling. It’s giving me the vibe that this person isn’t as harmless as they appear to be. But they’re proud of you, and you’re proud of them as well. There’s also some form of glow up from this relationship as well, where you improve yourself so that you can stand on equal grounds with the other person, but they’re also doing the same for you. I’m also seeing a lot of attraction and there’s some sort of fulfilment that you two find in each other. It’s like,,, you two are meant to be, that it’s natural that you two end up together, like it’s common sense. For some reason I’m also seeing love letters? So maybe one of you may have words of affirmation as your top love language.

A reminder: this reading is not for your future spouse, but for a potential romantic partner who’s gonna enter into your life. So it’s perfectly alright if you do not resonate with this reading.

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Pile 3:

Card of querent: The Devil

First thought I’m getting here is Lilith in 1H kinda vibe. You know who you are, and there’s some devilish charm that you put to great use. Badass, sexy, sultry, seducing vibes. You pay close attention to your heart and mind, not allowing fear to distract you (cues Lesserafim’s I’m Fearless). Straightforward, not hiding, out under the sun and making things your way. You know your cards and you play them well, mainly to protect yourself. But remember, some mischief of yours can accidentally cause a fire so please exercise caution. 

1. What type of relationship will we have? - Seven of Wands

There’s some sort of challenge I’m seeing here? Where you challenge each other and push each other to be better. But unlike Pile 2, this “better” is like… To be able to win against the other person. You two prolly have some form of conflict or competition going on. Highkey giving me enemies to lovers kinda energy. You two also persevere through the waves, where you two protect each other when someone wants to come in between you two. It’s like… “I’m the only one that’s allowed to win against them,” kinda energy, protective yet fiery.

2. How will I meet them? - Five of Cups rx

You’ll be meeting them when you’ve forgiven yourself and move on from whatever that’s been hurting you. This hurt is something that has been running deep in you and you’ve been held back by it, focusing on something else in order to forget the pain and disappointment that you’ve experienced. The reason for this pain is cuz this is something that has been running in your roots, something in your family that has affected you and has made you change your perspective of the meaning of Family. Perhaps there’s some form of betrayal? 

3. What type of person are they? - The Lovers rx

The Lovers rx really gives me the enemies to lovers vibe. A chance that this relationship can begin is that they’re not a typical lover. They’ve seen you at your worst, at your lowest, and know what your anger is like. And probably knows that you two complement each other’s goods and flaws. They accept who they are and their feelings for you, being open to new possibilities and welcoming new beginnings, especially new beginnings with you. They may be hard on you during the enemies phase, but once they’re in a relationship with you, they will not hesitate to pamper you.

4. How will I feel about them? - Queen of Pentacles rx

You’ll actually admire them with how they hold themselves, how they put themselves as their first priority. Some people may think of them as ruthless, self-centred, and for some reason I’m also picking up that some will also see your person as someone who’s unwilling to socialise. You may also think so at first. But as time passes, you’ll notice that the so-called self-centred is just them not willing to compromise as it will harm themselves and their loved ones; unwilling to socialise is cuz those kinda socialisation is energy draining; ruthless is just because they stand on their ground to fight for their own rights. You’ll slowly notice the quiet energy they have and how they don’t care about being misunderstood, which slowly draws you in, feeling secure having them by your side, supporting you.

5. How will they feel about me? - The Moon

There are a few words I’m picking up from here: mysterious, emotional, bubbly, charming, lovely. They find you charming and adorable, loving how you surround yourself with a certain mystery that is not… Attacking? Lemme try rephrasing myself. There are some mysteries that throw yourself into danger or unpleasant feelings when you try to uncover them. But not you. Your mystery is like a gift to be unboxed, allowing the bubbly and loving side of yours to be shown. They will also notice your emotional outburst is because you were wronged or justice was not on your side, and I’m seeing that they’ll be hella protective over you. You two may also share a past without y’all knowing about it. Maybe you two met before when you guys were kids? Or maybe a past life as well. They’ll find this nostalgia with you when they’re with you.

6. Our future together, what will they want from the relationship, etc. - Five of Swords rx, The Chariot, The High Priestess

I’m seeing that you guys may want to put down the swords, the fights, and to love you like the typical romantic partners. Y’know, instead of all the teasing and challenging and sometimes wanting to fist fight the other person, they wanna bring you out on dates and have fancy dinners and maybe go on a ferris wheel and kiss you kinda thing. It may sound cliche but they want to pamper you, to answer to your love languages. They appreciate you for who you are and enjoy being with you when you’re being yourself, being comfortable in your own skin. 

I’m also seeing that they have every intention to pursue this relationship with you, and prolly at a rather quick pace. There’s something that will trigger in them, letting them know that you’re the person that they wanna be with for the rest of their life, wanting you to be in their future plans as well. That’s when they start to push for the relationship and to marry you in the future. You may not know but their feelings for you are real and they love you more than you think it is. Unlike the other piles, I’m seeing there’s a marriage happening for this pile.

Overall energy: The Star, Justice rx

This reading gives me a warm, fun and honestly, fanfic kinda energy. You two shine bright in each other’s eyes, which kinda lights up the competitive streak in you two. But once you’ve gotten together, you guys will be siding with each other. It’s like us against the world kinda energy. You two are down for anything the other person wants to do, no matter how… Not good it can be. The passion for individual wins evolved into a passion for winning together, and this transition happens smoothly. You guys spend no time being confused, or questioning if this relationship will work. They’ll remember whatever promises they’ve made with you and will follow you wherever you wanna go. 

A reminder: this reading is not for your future spouse, but for a potential romantic partner who’s gonna enter into your life. So it’s perfectly alright if you do not resonate with this reading.

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Pile 4:

Card of querent: Justice rx

First question that I wanna ask you is that have you been treating yourself right? Been feeding yourself good food, staying hydrated, having enough rest? Cuz it feels like you’re not doing justice to yourself. You’re prolly in a burnout as well with you trying to focus on others instead of your own priority. Alternatively, you may also be facing some injustice yourself, where others took your credit and put the blame on you. Tho I’m seeing more of you not treating yourself right, or have been self-sabotaging. There’s also a chance of you not willing to take the best course of action. But whatever that you do, it’s causing you distress and you feel like you’re unable to find a way out.

1. What type of relationship will we have? - Seven of Pentacles

You guys will have a solid, grounded and fruitful relationship. You’ll put in the effort and work hard together to achieve what you aim. I feel that you two will know the importance of working the relationship together, knowing that the effort put in equates to the strength of the bond in relationships. Like,,, you guys do not take things for granted, and will learn that love is not just words but actions, and caring for someone is much better when you do things instead of like… Having empty words. The passion is there, but there’s an earthly, practical sense to it as well.

2. How will I meet them? - Ten of Cups

One funny thing about this was that when the card fell out, it was in reverse. But when I took it and placed it on the uhhh… Place where it’s supposed to be (spread and all), I placed it upright. And it felt right, so I went along with it.

With all that happened, it felt like the timing was right for things to happen. You’ve experienced unhappy times (and uhhhhh it’s VERY unhappy times), yet you still grit through them. It was difficult, but you decided to make changes and twisted your fate, being in content with yourself and your found family. And because of that, you were able to welcome this new person into your life as you were in a better place to manifest your dreams and desires (aka them, and other things, of course).

3. What type of person are they? - Nine of Cups rx

I feel that they’re someone who won’t be satisfied easily. They have a direction they want to head to but no final destination, which in a sense, means that they’ll constantly want more, constantly aim for more. For example, they’ve already gotten the job they wanted, then they’ll slowly climb the ladders, wanting to earn more. Firstly, they wanted to be able to afford a new phone, then a new car, then a new house. It’s like their goals keep growing and hence they need to continue improving themselves, not gonna stay satisfied wherever they are. I’m also seeing this in a sense in y’all’s relationship? But they’re more harsh towards themselves, feeling like they’re not doing enough, not loving you enough.

4. How will I feel about them? - Six of Swords rx

You may feel overwhelmed and have some trouble walking away from it. There’s a certain mystery in them that lure you in, probably there’s some eighth house synastry between you two, and that draws you in. I’m not sure what had happened, but there definitely was a time where you wanted to walk away from them, believing that you’re not suitable for them. Which… Actually isn’t. But yeah, with this, you may also feel some sort of inferiority with them, tho that’s not the case with them.

5. How will they feel about me? - Eight of Cups

You’re someone different, someone special who came into their life. They were walking away from things that have been tying them down, and they were afraid to have you in their life, tbh. They were afraid that they’d hold you down, weigh you down with whatever that’s happening with them. But despite the fear, they still want to welcome you into their life, inviting the magical you since you showed up and they took it as a sign that you’re meant to be with them. I’m seeing there’s some form of walking away from trauma together.

6. Our future together, what will they want from the relationship, etc. - Knight of Wands rx, Five of Swords, Ten of Swords rx

Honestly,  there’s a lot of fighting energy, a lot of conflict I’m seeing here. However, I don’t feel that there’s anger. The conflict is mainly due to impulsivity and fear. Lemme try to illustrate it.. Uhhh… For example, you’ve gotten into this relationship for like three months and you’ve already wanted to live with them, which you do. However, you guys barely know each other and you realise that the quirks they have frustrates you. Like, they do their share of housework but the way they do it just makes you oof. And as you continue living with them, you notice the differences you have in thinking. It’s like you two are from two different worlds and have different ways and views on how the world works. 

You guys can feel defeated by everything that’s happening, but if it’s resolved well and healthy boundaries are placed, the future will be a comfortable one. Sometimes, you’ll need to fight for your love, fight the expectations and filters of love that you’ve had, face the reality, and believe that there’s no fixed definition of love. It’s an open question and you’ll need to figure out which works for you, and what works in this relationship you share with them. I’m seeing that if all goes well, the future between you two will be very down-to-earth and realistic.

Overall energy: Death, Six of Wands

There’s pain, change and rebirth I’m seeing here. I think the Death card really symbolises the various changes and transformation you’ll experience in this possible upcoming relationship, and that you guys can come out victorious as long as you guys put in the effort. I feel like the word “effort” appeared a lot in your pile. No matter what happens, know that you both are divinely guided, and that your intuition will show you the way. It feels like a lot of challenges will be coming for you guys, but as long as you guys are constant with the effort to put things together, you guys will be fine. It’s alright to remain as who you are right now, because the you right now will grow up to tackle the problems at said time.

A reminder: this reading is not for your future spouse, but for a potential romantic partner who’s gonna enter into your life. So it’s perfectly alright if you do not resonate with this reading.

[ilys00ga]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍

pairing: yoongi x female reader.

synopsis: where you meet him during your best friend's wedding. can a heart beat again after breaking to pieces?

genre: best friend's brother!yoongi, actress!female reader, bookshop owner!yoongi, angst, kind of hurt/comfort, there's also some fluff, strangers to friends to lovers, slow burn, first encounters.

warnings: cheating, heartbreak, slight mentions of depression, failed past relationship, smoking. this is pure fiction ⚠️ !!

A/N: sorry for any typos or mistakes. just enjoy, pls :)! also, I might write a second part for this one. idk, tho.

ᵎᵎ 𖦹彡⋆｡˚・ ─ ・ ⋯ ・ ─ ⊹ ♡₊˚๑

- incoming message: "saera <3: are you ditching at the last minute?"

the screen read.

oppening the door to the hall in which everyone was already sat, you made your way into the room as quietly and as quickly as possible. and with your eyes scanning around in an attempt to spot your usual group of friends, a wave of relief washed over you upon finally spotting them.

"finally! was almost certain you won't be showing up." your friend, saera, muttered under her breath and pulled you to sit closer by her side.

"why wouldn't I?" you scoffed at first, but continued with a more serious tone upon seeing the concerned look her face held, "I'm sorry, I... got distracted."

"distracted?" her brow rose in a stern question, before slowly shaking her head in defeat. "right. seriously though, if you feel like it's too much just say the word and we'll leave."

"no, I'll leave and you'll stay and have all the fun here. I won't let my messed up past ruin this for you too." you argued.

"hey-!"

"I'm fine, I promise. I wouldn't be here if I weren't. we need to drop this topic now." you took her hands in yours, looking into her eyes with a serious expression, and she silently nodded her head after a few seconds. you smiled at her in thanks before turning to greet Jimin and Jisung, your other friends from work who were sitting right behind the two of you.

"how are you boys doing?"

"I'd be better if it weren't for this ridiculous dress code we had to follow." Jisung pointed to the pink hat he was wearing with a frown. Soyoon, the bride and your dearest friend, had insisted on setting a dress code for all the guests. everyone had to wear anything as long as it's not black - "black is boring! this is a wedding! MY wedding!" - or crazy-colorful, along with a special piece - a pink hat or a pink hair clip. something pink, you do you.

no one understood this weird dress code, yet no one dared to complain, simply trying to style their options as best as they could. and in her defense, sweet, typical Soyoon said she wanted to play around and test her guests for fun.

"talking as if you wouldn't wear the most ridiculous looking outfits on random work days all in the name of fashion." jimin chimed in to tease the other whining man, making saera laugh. the room fell silent, and the ceremony began shortly after they started their usual bickering war of words.

in your honest opinion, Soyoon was a very gorgeous woman. she was always well presented and beautiful. however, as she stood before the crowd with her smile so big and radiant, she looked like a literal princess. you stared at your best friend in pure awe because you're genuinely happy for her. so, so happy. and you ignored the feeling that weighted down on your heart as your mind clung back to the day you wore your own white gown and your own veil, all to cherish this precious moment. to celebrate with your loved ones.

just like that, the vows were pronounced and the husband kissed his bride. cheers and claps filled the room, and everyone moved to congratulate the newly wedded lovers. yet the party is still very young.

you stood aside for a while, allowing yourself to drink in the beautiful sight of pure happiness and love, reminding yourself that the world is still moving even though you were busy being stuck in the past. you observed until the tornado that's been brewing in your chest grew violent before walking out of the scene, out and towards the small lake situated not far away from the building.

it's been exactly eight months and a couple of days since you've stood in front of your own wedding venue. eight-going-nine months since you got your heart broken.

maybe you were just a coward, too scared to face your own emotions, but it's not like you chose not to attend one all this time. you just couldn't. no matter how hard you tried to overcome the pain, the wound was still so fresh, and it only seemed to be getting bigger than you, swallowing you alive.

the pain of seeing the person you were so bewitched by, to whom you were ready to spend the rest of your life being committed, the one you loved with your entire heart inside some random room in the same venue the two of you chose to finally celebrate your love, all pressed up against the wall with another woman. kissing and doing things you decided not to even attempt to think about or recall.

at the time, it took you a good five minutes to get yourself together, to look closely to confirm that what you saw was indeed real and not just some messed up image your pre-wedding anxiety was trying to print into your brain, before sprinting out of the building and running far, far away from everything. running despite your legs feeling like they could explode at any given moment. you ran until you reached an empty unknown, crouching down and spilling your heart through your eyes and across your cold cheeks as you cried and cried and cried with the wind slapping against your skin.

from then on, you could never attend a wedding. no matter who the loved one was to you, you just couldn't bring yourself to do it. all you could do was smile apologetically as you politely rejected their invitation. and they understood because they knew.

eight months and there you were. numb body sitting on a bench, with a little cigarette between a thumb and an index, pulling and exhaling every now and then as you let the calm of the lake and the green of the grass, along with the color of the flowers do their favorite game of soothing your heart.

part of you wished you were the smoke that rose and flourished in the sky, giving its weight and color up to become one with the wind.

"not a fan of parties too?" a voice that sounded concerned, but very timid and gentle, broke the silence. almost like it was too ashamed of announcing its own presence. and if its deepness startled you, you didn't let it show. Instead, you lifted your head and saw a man standing close by, with his hands tucked into the pockets of his dark blue trousers and head tilted slightly in question.

"mind if i join you?" the sight of him scratching the nape of his neck with an awkward smile triggered your own smile, but you really weren't in the mood, so you wordlessly nodded towards the empty spot next to you and he didn't comment on that.

"it's more about the event itself rather than the crowd." you took a cigarette out of your purse and extended it to the pale skinned man.

"well, then we're not as similar as I assumed. and for that, I apologize." he mused, accepting your offer with a smile. you watch as he put it between his lips and leaned in towards the lighter you held out for him. "thanks" he nodded, taking a long pull and sighing as he breathed out and goaned in satisfaction.

you didn't know what to say, how to lay it out to him. in fact, you weren't even sure if you should let him know. after all, he was a stranger that you've never seen before. but your heart squeezed with a sudden need to talk, to explain why and how you were so messed up, while your brains insisted no.

you shook your head with a sigh, trying to think of something to say when the man caught you off guard with a question, "do you like playing UNO?"

snapping your head towaards him, you saw him holding a box of UNO cards, waving it slightly and proudly showing it off to you with a smile, and you couldn't help but giggle at that.

"why did you carry UNO cards with you to a wedding?" he chuckled with a shrug before sheepishly admitting that he bought it as a gift for his little niece.

"do you want to play, yes or no?" he smirked and narrowed his eyes in a teasing manner.

"gosh. open it already."

he does as he's told, scooting a little farther than you to make a little space in which the two of you started playing the silly little game.

"how do you know Soyoon?" the man wondered aloud.

"she's my best friend slash co-worker. what about you?"

"her brother, yoongi." he simply answered. you knew Soyoon had a brother before, but you never got to meet or even ask about him.

"it's an honor to finally meet you, then. I'm ___."

"i know you, soyoon talked about you and a couple of other friends before." yoongi smiled shyly, everting his eyes to focus back on the game.

"you seem pretty good at this, wasn't expecting that, to be honest." yoongi hummed at your teasing comment, picking a card, a plus two card, when it was his turn and putting it atop the pilled up ones in the middle. "glad you're having fun. I was afraid you would stick to your frown for the rest of the ceremony and never show us your cute smile."

heat rushed through your face, tinting your cheeks as his words, along with his slick move and the smirk on his face settle in your head.

"you didn't seem happy." he explained further, locking his eyes with yours, and you cleared your throat in an attempt to brush your brush off and continued to play.

"I don't really fancy weddings." you said.

"understandable. I don't fancy parties and public places either."

"yeah, but your circumstances are probably very different from mine."

he snorts "social anxiety is social anxiety."

"did you get your heart broken from an ex fiancé, soon-to-be husband like i did?" you failed to fight the bite in your tone, and your face hardened for a moment before softening again when he didn't respond with anything.

"sorry about that." you apologized.

"it's fine." he smiled.

your little bubble was popped open when a feminine voice called out your name, saera was waving for you to come over. you let out a small "oh" and faced yoongi who scrunched his nose in response, "guess the game's over." he stood up and offered his hand for you.

"for now," you noted, taking his hand and standing up as well, "we still didn't see who's the winner."

for a brief moment, you looked down at the cards you were still holding in your other hand, and then met his eyes again, "it was a lovely game can't wait to see again and beat you at last."

you could feel your hands shaking slightly, hesitating before extending a reverse card towards him with a shy smile. yoongi stared dumbfoundedly at first, then took the card with an equally shy smile.

"I'll be eagerly waiting, then."

you two started towards the building, with you taking rushed steps thanks to the way saera's been signaling for you to hurry up! and you didn't miss her little smirk when you finally reached her, nor the way she discreetly tilted her head towards the other man who was still a few steps far behind.

"I've seen a lot, but playing card games as a first interaction in a ceremony is quite new to me." she linked her arm with yours and guided you towards the main hall, where everyone was still chatting and enjoying their time.

"the party's ending, let's go say bye to the bride!" you ignored her comment with a cheer.

"my girls!" soyoon greeted with her arms open wide for the two of you.

"our beautiful, beautiful bride!" and saera cheered just with an equal amount of joy.

the bride pulled away to look at you with a grateful smile, "thank you so much for being here."

"oh please, did you expect me to really ditch your special day because of some stupid past drama?!" you scoffed.

"I know how hard it's been for you, my dear. I'm so glad you're here."

"it's really nothing." you insist.

"yeah, she was having fun with your brother out there, don't worry about her." saera winked with a mischievous smile, which pulled a gasp from soyoon, startled.

"wait what?!"

"oh my god. stop, you two. we just talked a little bit. I've never got to meet him before." you whined.

"neither did I!" saera fired back.

"well, I'm not gonna lie, you two are a good material." soyoon smirked and giggled with saera. both of them always loved to tease you.

"I'm leaving!"

"don't forget, we're having a sleepover this weekend!" you roll your eyes at saera before bidding you goodbye, hugging the girls one last time and leaving with a weirdly much lighter heart.

[yoonsdoll]

a love worth waiting for - chs

content : bsf!vernon x f!reader ; a lil angsty but fluff & happy ending ; 1.5k words warnings : vernon curses like 2ce lol - you are the most important person to vernon, but is it requited? an : i keep going on random writing hiatuses for no reason even tho i have so many ideas idek someone sos!!

vernon has loved you ever since he met you. as cheesy as it sounds, its something he cant deny whenever his friends ask him about, something he rants for hours about to his sister, something he finds himself thinking about more often than not. 

he remembers it like it was yesterday, even if its been years. it was an unusual meeting; seeing a pretty girl on a walk in the middle of summer would usually be normal, if only he didn't trip on a rock and land awkwardly conveniently on your path… and then make a comment on how his sister has the same shoes as you as if you’d care.

but you did. you made sure he was okay and laughed at his comment, then blabbered something about how your boyfriend has a similar hat to him. and, oh. he should've seen that coming.

of course he should have. such a put together, sweet girl would obviously have lines of guys lining up at her feet (or falling, in hansols case). but that didn’t matter - you only just met, you’d probably become friends if he asked for your number, that would be enough for him.

and for the first few months it was enough. you hit it off great, messaging each other often and even hanging out occasionally… well, when your jackass boyfriend let you. he hated your boyfriend - no, despised him. it wasn't even a case of jealousy; more of a genuine worry, at least for a while. he made it vocal on how he doesn’t like how your boyfriend controlled your life, but obviously supported your choices anyway. who wouldn't? you became his best friend, he would do anything to see you happy.

behind the worry he presented, vernon was stuck.

“i don't get it, why would she be with him if he's so.. controlling and mean?” everyday he called his friends.

“she literally looks unhappy, i feel bad and.. i dunno, angry... is that stupid?” everyday he talked about it, about how he wants to help you and, well, about you. “shes so… nice and pretty and forgiving. dude, he really doesn’t deserve her.”

until one day, “i could treat her better.”

he accepted it. he knew it wasn’t fair, for him or for you. everything leading up to that moment that he did, he thought it was simply sympathy. he put on this friendly act to not hurt your feelings, but maybe it was to not hurt his own. you wore your heart on your sleeve. it was obvious you were in love with your boyfriend, not him. and no matter what he did, that wouldn’t change.

soon you noticed the same things that vernon begged you to see in your boyfriend for a very long time. the gaslighting, restrictiveness, the bored attitude, and when you drifted apart it was only a waiting game till you broke it off.

vernon was surprised that the way his eyes sparkled when you came to cry to him didn’t give him away. truthfully, he couldn’t care less about the way it all went down or what he told you while you broke up with him. what mattered was that you were out of the situation you were blinded in. 

“he was a fucking dick,” no brainer, “its unfair - y'know, someone you love being out of reach.” those words sounded awfully familiar.

actually, maybe to him what mattered more is that he finally could reach you.

“i still love him,” you mumbled between your tears as vernon cooed at you.

he should've seen that coming too, and he couldn’t blame you at all - ever. but why did it sting so much more than the first time?

when he searched for your laugh after making a joke, you were laughing out of pity. when he comforted you, you weren’t thinking about him and how he was always there for you, instead you were thinking about yourself. when home to him was wherever you were, home to you was wherever your ex boyfriend was.

you just lost someone so dear to you and he was being so selfish. 

you two breaking up should've been the greatest thing he has heard in months, but instead he suddenly couldn’t help but feel like there was a bigger wall between you both than ever. 

of course, you never had feelings for him in the first place. vernon knew that. but something in him always held onto the possibility of you ending up together. not anymore, not after those four words left your mouth. he felt stupid for ever even having hope.

he paused to think before he spoke - something he rarely ever did when he was with you. “i know you do.” shaking his head gently, he added, “your heart just got broken, its a fresh wound, of course you still love him.” did everything he say have to apply to him too? it was almost humiliating in a way.

“its embarrassing… im the one who broke it off, i shouldn’t like him.” right, you felt it too.

at the end of the day, no matter who he was to you, you recognised him as someone you could trust. you spoke your thoughts freely, you were always by his side, you were his best friend; thats something vernon failed to see. he understood now to expect nothing but appreciate everything. because after all, being your friend would always be enough for him.

vernon promised himself he wouldn’t do or say anything stupid for your sake. he knew breakups are tough, and he knew that feelings don’t change in a day. he loved you, so he never would blame you for anything negative you made him feel. he wouldn’t blame you because you didn’t know.

or so he thought.

because months later when you arrived at his door looking more nervous than usual with a small smile on your face, vernon couldn’t be more confused.

“its almost 11pm.. what’re you doing here…?”

you let yourself in, setting your shoes aside and placing your coat on the hanger before grabbing his hand and dragging him to the couch to sit down.

“is it true?” 

“...is what true?”

“is it true that you have feelings for me?”

was that a trick question? “i mean..” he cleared his throat with a harsh cough, leaving the room silent for a few moments that felt like hours. “is that really what you’re doing at my house at 11 in the evening?”

“stop it. stop avoiding the question. just answer me.” 

“where’d you even get that idea from? dude i mean, you’re my best friend so if you’re asking -”

“you know what im asking..” your hands felt clammy, suddenly regretting knocking on the door after debating if you should for a solid 5 minutes. “i’m.. not mad or anything.” you added.

this was the million dollar question. he felt scared. “ha..” he couldn’t help but scoff to himself, “yeah.” though his tone tried being confident, the lack of eye contact and leg jittering was enough to see how nervous he truly was.

“im… so sorry,” you stared at him with your nose slightly scrunched - a detail he noticed whenever you were upset. “what? sorry? pfft.. theres nothing to be sorry for.” you figured he’d say that.

“im sorry for not noticing it earlier. i feel like an idiot.”

“no.. i feel like the idiot.” he quickly butted in, trying to take the blame, “you shouldn’t have to ‘notice’ anything. i should have told you ages ago so we could get past… whatever this is. i was just being a pussy and i -”

you admired his dedication to try explain but decided to stop him. “no vernon, im sorry for making you wait.” 

making him wait? “what are you even talking about? you didn’t do anything i swear…”

“maybe you really are the idiot..” you suddenly smiled a little wider, catching him off guard, “i meant i'm sorry for not noticing my feelings.. for you.. earlier.”

if he was confused before, he was now completely dumbfounded. the frown on his face wiped into a completely new expression. one of certain shock and hope, but with an equal amount of doubt. 

“agh..” you groaned in fake annoyance, feeling your cheeks heat up in embarrassment, “i’m telling you that i like you too.”

oh. for once, he didn’t see that coming.

“are you serious?” he mumbled out, struggling to process the consumed information, a million things going through his mind.

“no im lying.” you tilted your head, “obviously im serious, why else would i be here?”

“you’re right.. i don’t know why i said that.” he nodded, a smile forming on his own face, “im just… at a loss of words dude.”

he let go of a breath he didn’t notice he was holding, sighing from relief as he looked at you. no more words were exchanged before he moved closer to hug you. a hug of love, ease and joy.

“if so.. can i be your boyfriend?” he whispered in a happier tone than before, the previous fear moulded into delight.

“yeah. i’d like that a lot.”

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Alan & Jeff Forever!

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Jan 2024 Wk 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

The Sign (Sat YT) ep 10 of 12 - I am a little concerned that this is getting too big for its britches, rather like Phaya’s recently recovered snake… shall we say? Adding in yet another character at this juncture isn’t the best idea. Still, I love how this show makes me cackle laugh with grandmas + Yai and then TENSION.

It’s a wobbly kind of balance but a balancing act is happening nonetheless. It makes the pacing of this show good. It may be all over the place but I'm never bored.

Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 11 of 14 - No trash talk this week, I was charmed & delighted. Who knew I would actually enjoy this show? Certainly not me. (not much of a...) Trash watch happening here.

Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 8 of 12 - I am pretty much skipping most of the 3 chef friends, and all of the side dish action (sorry Neo). And with OffGun apart for most of this ep, it didn’t hold together since they are the glue. Sigh.

Last Twilight (Fri YT) ep 12fin - Okay let’s talk about it.

Mhok should have gone off with someone else. Day treated him like shit and never once apologized. To assume an apology isn’t necessary is to pity Day in the exact way he didn’t want. (On a complete aside, one of my favorite Thai restaurants back in my mispent youth was in Hilo, HI… ah memories) meanwhile the "passing escalators trope" activated in the land of malls (it’s been a while my old friend).

Anygay, I hold that Mohk was not a fault and Day was the one who needed to apologize.

Although they did have one of BL's BEST ever face touch moments. 

In conclusion: 

The story of a blind man and his caregiver falling in love. Mark is great. JimmySea are spectacular. The support cast is GMMTV-good. And for the first 3/4 this BL was something rather special. But it was let down by its ending (for which I entirely blame the author). In order to like this show you must buy into the premise that Mhok was in the wrong and caused their breakup. If you don’t believe that, you won’t like this BL. Also "fixing a disability = true happiness" is gross messaging. For me, endings counts for a lot and this one was ultimately “happy” but felt like a failure. 7/10 and I was sorely tempted to go as low as a 6/10, so it should count itself lucky 

I dithered my darling BLabies... I dithered A LOT over this one. But JimmySea alone held this one up.

GMMTV we gotta talk. You're fielding some of the world's best pairs right now. It's time to get them equally good scripts.

For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - This installment had too much of the side couple in it. Although it was nice to see First/Dream (Twins) again. He's still a cutie, even playing a straight. 

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) ep 23 of 24 - I have to say I’m very glad we are on the last installment of the series. Narcissistic hairdresser starts seeing a spirit in a mirror. Turns out to be a friend from his youth who he thought was dead. This one is kinda sweet, and I find the premise interesting. Is the kid actually dead and a spirit? Or is there something else going on? I am intrigued. And I like the actor playing the kid in the mirror. I suspect this will be sad tho.

Time the series (Thai Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - I don’t exactly know what is going on. And frankly I don’t particularly care, either. So far nothing seems to be happening, and I really intensely dislike one half of the main couple. DNF welcome 2024 here we go 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Love For Love's Sake (Korea Weds iQIYI) 1-2 of 8 - based on the Manhwa Love Supremacy Zone by Hwacha (they should have kept the original title). I adore the premise. IRL person has been sent into fictional universe to save a side character from doom. Fantastic. Every fanfic author's dream. Also, I love that our POV was the bad boy in high school so there’s also a redemption arc going on. I adore this kind of isekai (if you wanna call it that). Puppy/cat pairing too! 

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - Oh my goodness they too cute. Basically dating. Although only one of them realizes it, and he is such a drama queen. It’s GREAT. Also they are both so damn gay. I love the supportive bestie trying to cope with the girl who has a crush on his gay bff. 

Happy Ending (Korea Tues YT) 1 of 3 - Strongberry is back and it’s very them and very atmospheric and cute. I’m enjoying it. 

Sahara-sensei to Toki-kun (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 7 of 8 - Japan giveth and Japan taketh away again. Look, I just like the lost love teacher/teacher couple better. I'm assuming they'll have to do a time jump in the final episode to make this one work at all. 

I am SO GLAD we have KBLs back on our screens.

It's done

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.

The Servant and the Young Master - from Vietnam so I assume it's on YouTube. I never even noticed. Anyone?

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - Is TRUST Entertainment bringing us the first ever Burmese BL? I don't know if it's really the first, but @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will give it a watch through.

Beside You (Thai ????) - a 3 ep short that's supposed to have aired but I can't find it.

It's Airing But...

[NO INTERNATIONAL] Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - yeah Japan put the smack down on our boys. Sadness. You can use a VPN if you like. Read all about it here.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.

Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.

The Whisperer (Sun ????) 10 eps - Ends next week. Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). I don't think even the perfect single dimple can motivate me to watch. Word is... it's terrible.

7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) 10 eps - Giving me Luminous Solution vibes. I'm waiting to binge if safe.

Dead Friend Forever (Thai Sat iQIYI) - horror, meh, tell me if it's worth my time?

In Case You Missed it

All my year-end round ups:

TOP 10 BL Trends of 2023

Top 10 BL Secondary Pairs of 2023

2023 BLs Best Trope Execution Awards! TOP 10

All the BLs Announced for 2023 that didn't happen

BL 2023's Best:

Back Hugs Thailand & Elsewhere

Cute Bits of Domesticity

Boys Feeding Boys

BOOP!

Best Cuddles

Heads in Laps

Touching Head Touches

Thailand Put His Head on Your Shoulder

Put Your Head on My Shoulder (not Thailand)

BEST KISSES (not Thailand)

BEST KISSES FROM THAILAND

Next Week Looks Like This:

2/2 City of Stars AKA Fueangnakorn (Fri YouTube?) 10 eps - An actor falls in love with a programmer and the narrative intends to “explore the ramifications of being public figure in the social network era who must endure critics, bullying, and defamation.” Looks like another Lovely Writer/Call It What You Want sort of thing. But helmed by Star Hunter? Chaos will ensue.

2/2 Anti Reset AKA Anti-Reset (Taiwan Fri Gaga?) 10 eps - from Vidol (who aren't doing us very proud right now) - Human and robot find love.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Say what you like about this show (and I have) they do some very gay cuddling. (Him the series)

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.

This show, damnit, so close to being genius. (Last Twilight)

I don't that's a hardshi,p grandma ... although it may be a hard ship... get it.

I'll stop now.

(The Sign)

(Last week)

[torialefay]

☀️ Sun in Libra ⚖️

bangchan as your boyfriend!!! (pt. 2)

(based on astrology) 🔞

✨bangchan x reader (f); fluff, angst, slight smut if you count like 4 sentences.

✨ word count: 2.3k

✨take a look into chan’s natal chart to see what type of boyfriend he would be! in this post, i will be talking about his sun in libra. this is a series!!! so follow up later if u want more <3

✨i will give a brief synopsis of what each chart placement means (for all my non-astrology friends out there <3) and how that would affect channie in a relationship :)

✨ author’s notes:

(1) some very sweet stays confirmed that channie’s birth time is in fact 20:54, yay! this means i will get to look into more aspects of his chart and post more content for anyone who wants to keep up.

★★(2) i am considering doing brief (just bullet points/highlights) astrological compatibility readings if anyone wants one! if you’re interested, message me your birth date, time, and location OR lmk your placements. i’m gonna limit the reading to include you x 1 skz member only! just specify who you’d like.

(3) i am trying to get better at using gender-neutral pronouns so more people can feel included in my posts. i’m really struggling since i use phrases like “my girl” a lot. anyone who has some good alternatives or tips, please message and lmk!

(4) the aspects in this reading are based solely on my opinions and interpretations! nothing about a person is set in stone simply because of astrology. please don’t use anything i say as canon :)

✨warnings: light sexual undertones???

✨ tl/dr: chan is a people pleaser, and thus as a bf will be a YOU pleaser. happy thirsting.

Sun in Libra: Sun signs are all about personality- the face you show the world! It is also the lens through which you usually see yourself and how friends would describe you.

-Libra is a cardinal sign, meaning that people who are in this placement REALLY live by the aspects associated with that placement- in other words, chan is likely to hold very true to these values.

-Libra is ruled by Venus, the planet of love, beauty, and charm. People with a Libra Sun tend to be extremely charming and value beauty in the world. They often seek approval from others and are people pleasers. They want to be well-liked and well-known. Because of this, they will avoid conflict and have a hard time being criticized or being involved in drama of any kind. They will also often “mold” themselves to fit into any environment. This is partially because they highly value balance and peace in their lives, and can also lead to indecisiveness.

as your boyfriend:

• Chan will mold every aspect of his personality to fit with yours. Once he decides he is interested in you (because he can be one indecisive mf’er), he will literally BECOME the person you want and need (even tho you think he’s perfect as is). And he loves it too. He loves the feeling of being the only person in the world who is “perfectly made for you." Even more, he loves the fact that you know that he’s the perfect man for you. He will need constant reassurance of it too.

• He LOVES when you dress him. I’m talking (1) you are picking him out an entire wardrobe, (2) you are picking his outfits for every date you go on… so it matches with you ofc hehe, (3) if he doesn’t know what to wear, he is automatically calling you (i mean you know his closet anyways since you chose it all, so might as well choose from afar). He wouldn’t buy any clothing without sending it to you first to make sure you think it’d look good on him. He’d like for you to pick him out new styles, but he would ADORE when you stick to things he’s comfortable with like blacks and more comfortable attire. He would love how much you thirsted over him when he put on his “bad boy tumblr aesthetic” outfits. It would make him feel so much more confident going into everyday life knowing that he was dressing up for and catering to his girl only.

• He will absolutely still mildly flirt with stays (sorry y’all). But he will be mindful to not take things too far… in other words, no more calling stays Mrs. Bang lol. That one is reserved for you. He just has such a charming and flirtatious personality that he can’t help himself. BUT he always makes sure to conclude anything he says to stay with “haha I’m just joking… So thankful my beautiful girlfriend will share me with STAY.”

• He is taking you out on LOTs of dates and TONS of events. He is a super social guy, so he loves any chance he gets to take you out and make memories- especially in groups. If any of the boys have a significant other, he would love nothing more than to go on double dates with them. He would always plan for something low key, but fun with them. Anything extravagant is reserved for you only.

• Chan would introduce you to all the s/o’s of skz and would basically push you to be besties (without even realizing it). He’s so good at being social and over-committing himself that he would most likely always take up the opportunity to hang out with skz and their partners, including you by default. Cause you’re an extension of him, duh. He’d love when you’d bond and get super close with the members’ partners, and it would reassure him that you were the one for him when he saw how well and perfectly you blended into the friend group.

• He is buying you flowers every damn week. It doesn’t matter if you’re with him or on the other side of the world, he is making sure you have flowers. Or snacks. Or whatever you’re into. He is a people pleaser by nature, and who else would he want to please? He also can’t resist the smile on your face when he knows that he’s the cause.

• He likes it when you baby him. You are the ONLY person he lets take care of him. He has such a strong and happy personality with others, and many times he will not feel comfortable being vulnerable with too many people. You know how stressed he gets. He is always trying to keep up appearances after all. When he gets home from a long day of doing everything anyone could possibly ask of him, he feels the immediate comfort of knowing that you will take good care of him. He would love when he’d come home to a meal that you cooked. Or when you were watching a movie and you’d sit up with your legs in front of you, motioning for him to rest his head on your lap so you could play with his hair. He would absolutely melt if he was sitting at his desk working on something, and you’d come up behind him, towering over him with forehead kisses while you squeezed into his back. He would love the comfort he felt during foreplay (or even when he was bored) of just holding, squeezing, and sucking on your tits while you looked down at him with loving eyes. He’d go wild at the way you would straddle him and rub him through the fabric of his shorts while telling him how perfect and loved he is.

• Channie will hate any fights he has with you. He genuinely cannot deal with it. He hates feeling like he’s done something wrong, and it will take him a longggg time to talk to you about it if he feels something isn’t right or if he gets mad. Usually, you will have to initiate the conversation.

• “Channie? Can we talk?” You knocked on his door. You had gotten into an argument with him about an hour ago.

◦ A stupid argument really. He had heard you talking with a friend over the phone. “You and I both know Chris isn’t going to buy me that,” you laughed into your cell. “He’s saving up for that new car that he has to have,” you rolled your eyes and smiled. You thought it was a joke of course. It’d be ridiculous for him to buy you a $5,000 ring for no reason. YOU thought you were just being sarcastic. Maybe in retrospect, Chan didn’t feel the same.

◦ He looked at you with a face that tried to mask being upset. But you could tell. “What are you talking about?” He asked with a clenched jaw.

◦ “That ring,” you smiled and stuck your tongue out at him, obviously messing with him. He knew the ring. You’d showed him weeks ago.

◦ You saw his face go blank, like a bare canvas just waiting to see what reaction would be painted on next. He raised his eyebrows, pursed his lips, and nodded. You could see the annoyance on his face. He stood up of the couch and promptly headed to the bedroom. What was his problem?

◦ Now here you are… an hour later and radio silence.

• Chan gave no response. “Please, I want to talk about this…” you trailed off and waited for a few seconds. Still no response. “Come on Channie, I hate when we are fighting, please let’s just talk about this so we can feel better.” You heard rustling and then saw the door in front of you slowly open. There was a messy-headed Chris stood in front of you with puffy eyes and a locked-in jaw. You put your hand on his chest and nudged him ever so slightly so you could pass through the doorway and sit on the edge of his bed. He followed.

• “Okay, do you want to go first, or do you want me to go?” You asked, trying to get him to look into your eyes. He avoided them at all costs.

• “Do you really think I’m that bad of a boyfriend? You think I’m that self-absorbed to be funneling money into some fancy car, when I wouldn’t even buy you a ring you’ve been wanting for months? I would give you the world y/n, and you know that! Why would you even say something like that?” His lids and eyebrows turned downward as he spoke loudly. He was genuinely hurt.

• “No, I do not think you are a bad boyfriend! I think you are the best boyfriend in the world. Honey, I was KIDDING. I know how expensive that ring is. I was making light of how ridiculous it would be for you to just randomly buy it for me. I was joking that the reason you didn’t do it was because of the car, but it was just sarcasm. That’s literally it. How could you think I was serious?” You looked him dead in the eyes with a furrowed brow.

• “Because I AM serious y/n. I already bought you that ring. Because I love you. I was waiting until Valentine’s Day to give it to you. And you saying that just makes me feel like I’m the worst boyfriend. And now, that’s what your friends think too. I just- that just makes me really upset.” You felt your heart break. It wasn’t anger in his voice. It was disappointment. Disappointment in you. You knew how badly he struggled with self-image and with how others perceive him. It meant a lot to him. Even though he was trying to work through it, he wasn’t there yet. And you knew that.

• “Channie,” you breathed out. “I am so so sorry. I need you to know that it wasn’t my intention to make you feel that way. I think you are the perfect boyfriend.” You scooted closer to cup his face in your hands. “My friends know you are the perfect boyfriend. I talk about it all the time.” You lowered your face down to look him in the eyes. “I tell them about how much of a gentleman you are, always opening the door for me and holding my hand when we’re walking. About how beautiful you sound when I visit you at the recording studio and you’re making a sample. About how strong you are that I can feel it every time I grab onto your arms.” A tiny smile crept across his face and he looked down in embarrassment. You unconsciously mirrored his smile back. “I absolutely revel in the fact that you are the most perfect man I’ve ever known. Please don’t think that I think anything less of you. You are my perfect boy, and I’m sorry if I did anything to make you feel unloved or unappreciated. I will call her back right now just to emphasize to her that I was kidding if you think it would help you feel better.”

• Chan had a small tear in his eye when he finally looked back up at you. “No, no, you don’t need to do that… I’m sorry baby. I just- I took it the wrong way. You know I can do that from time to time,” he giggled up at you, getting embarrassed again. And he wasn’t wrong. “You are the most special person in the world to me. I never want to not live up to what you deserve… I know I have had problems with this, but I promise you that I’m working on them, and I will continue to work on them until I get better at it. You’ve already helped me so much.” Looking deeply at you, he sighed and tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “I will do better, I promise.”

• “It’s okay, it really is. We just have to work together through this. I also promise to do better at not making little jokes about you and being more respectful about our relationship. We will work on it together, okay? Deal?”

• “Deal.” He stuck out his pinky for you to intertwine with yours. In the same moment, you both bent down to kiss your hand. You’re sworn into the pinky promise now. You followed up with a swift kiss to his lips and a big hug around his neck. You stayed like that, locked in for a couple of seconds until you could feel his body relax underneath you.

• “Let’s not fight anymore. This feels way better,” you murmured into the side of his neck.

• “I can think of something else that would feel even better.” He locked his hands behind your waist and flipped you to onto your back. Maybe pinky promises could be broken, you thought. Hell, you’d break it if the fighting led to this.

• He gently kissed down your neck. “We will be okay,” he whispered softly into your ear. “I will be perfect for you, and you will be perfect for me.” Sun in Libra.

[simplyreveries]

hewwoooo i was the anon who requested the trey + vil with plus-sized reader :3 i really love your writing!!!! so expect me to come back here pretty often :D you can call me 🫀 anon from now on hehe (and also expect all my requests to be platonic except for trey oop)

im here for another request !! may i request the shroud brothers, vil, leona and trey with an ignihyde!reader ?? my self-insert is actually an ignihyde student based on the fates so i cant really insert myself into twst x readers with yuu!reader lol. no pressure tho <3

here ya go!! I'm super happy you liked my other one, I apologize for this one's wait i got busy!<3

idia shroud

it’ll take a while for the two of you to become any sorts of close. i can imagine your meetings (even though he's your own DORM LEADER lmao) will be brief and vague, sometimes seemingly halfhearted when he is forced to tell his dorm something, to which he usually just messages.

you’ll find him lurking and leaving his room in the late hours to get something or go the sam's mystery shop if it's still open for instant food or stuff of that sorts. nevertheless, you still are an ignihyde student so you two do seem to get along pretty well. even in those short moments— he finds himself being okay around you.

i guess you could say he is relieved you're one of the few people who won't make idia feel utterly awkward or uncomfortable running into so that's definitely some sort of a relief for him. in fact, that usually entails you two ending up hanging out together or doing something stupidly fun together.

ortho shroud

aside from idia he actually did make an effort to get to know you in the first place and in his attempts to get idia out more, suggested you guys hang out at times! he’d claim and tell idia how interesting of a person you were— plenty of stories as someone who even has been or lived in their homelands, the shaftlands!! he wants to see everyone in the dorm get along well. so, you may see him actively trying to get you and idia to be friends as well haha

im sure you two did become unlikely friends though it's inevitable, especially with ortho. he is happy to see his brother get along with you, its very common soon enough that you guys commonly hang out together.

ortho is very sweet whenever you pass him by in the dorm or in school always saying "hello" or asking how you're feeling. he's happy to be able to get along with others in his dorm.

vil schoenheit

he's curious about you quite a bit considering he knows how the reputation of ignihyde students are well…. very reclusive and don't really interact much with others and other dorms. he has worked with ignihyde students in the past with favors and needing stuff for his film making club (like the magical wheel he needed for epel once) which usually makes him prompt to coming towards you a lot to inquire and get any tech and gadgets that could be used for films they're making… even if you may not be the most outgoing person, he’ll surprisingly feel quite easy to talk to.

if you tend to take on the habits of your fellow dormmates or your dorm leader, he will once in a while tell you to make sure you're taking care of yourself and make sure you're doing things like self-care or sleeping right. it's nothing harsh or anything but it's a small way he looks out for you as he gets closer to you throughout time.

you're like a favored student of his from that dorm, he has grown to be pretty fond of. you've piqued his interest enough and helped him out too that he does seem kinder to you in ways.

leona kingscholar

originally, he really had no interested talking to or frankly being around any of that dorm. besides like idia during dorm leader meetings, he barely even knew anyone there despite it being at least his 4th year in that school. he still finds it, unusual and even strange that you've become rather close to him (even if that may feel one sided but it's just leona ok)

he does tend to feel more content and okay with you if you’re more on the quieter side anyway. he does grow a small sense of fondness to you— he even finds himself slightly surprised as your the last person he expected to garner his attention. but nevertheless, you found yourself nicely close to him even if he doesn’t show it the best.

leona sometimes makes quips or teases about your own dorm, how considerably different the two may be. especially a lot at first before you two grew closer, he just found it strange almost, to find yourself close to him.

trey clover

its funny because besides like ortho or idia and maybe a few various students of that dorm here and there in the school— ever so introverted and quiet he doesn't see that many of your dorm. even cater himself admits he doesn't seem to really know or have any friends from that dorm and he's cater! trey will muse he’s beaten cater at that by dating one.

you may have to get used to his dorm being pretty social, considering all the events they hold whereas you’re probably used to the cold and quiet ignihyde dorms. you may have to even adjust whenever you decide to come over and see trey, especially with people like cater or ace who are heavily social.

he hopes you’ll grow and find yourself comfortable there, you’ll find him laughing bashfully when pointing out their antics in comparison to the dormmates you're used to. you'll find him chuckling asking how you manage to put up with some of them, he can only imagine how different it must be for you.

[fallinforerling]

LOVE ISN'T ETERNAL. chapter 9 - jb

ೃ⁀➷ jude’s masterlist

ೃ⁀➷ jude’s taglist

ೃ⁀➷ masterlist

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

After being dropped off by Jude’s parents, you stayed on the couch for a good hour thinking about how bizarre the whole day was. You didn’t even want to check your phone right now, so you just left it in your living room and went directly to get a hot shower. 

While undressing, you noticed that you had dinner while wearing Jobe’s jersey. Hah, now it made sense why so many people took double looks at you. Not that you cared.

You just wanted to relax for once. The whole process of getting ready for bed got you in a better mood; so after doing your skincare and drinking some tea, you felt ready to check your messages.

There were some texts from the girls and some from Jobe. You went for Jobe’s first since they were the most recent.

✉️ Jobe: Thank you for the weirdest night ever

✉️ You’re welcome?

✉️ Jobe: No, seriously. I haven’t seen Jude this happy for a while now

✉️ Jobe: He’s close to giggling and kicking his feet like a little girl

✉️ lmao

✉️ Maybe that’s because I told him I was going to unblock him

✉️ Jobe: Did you?

✉️ Not yet…

✉️Jobe:  Well, maybe you should

✉️ Oh my god??? What’s happening???

✉️ Jobe: I talked to him, just… Maybe? I won’t force you tho

✉️ I’ll consider it

✉️ Jobe: That’s good enough for me… Have a good night, darling

✉️ Good night, sweetie

Odd. What could possibly be happening that Jobe was (kinda) defending his brother? You didn’t blame him, obviously. But… Again, odd. With a shrug, you hopped on the girl’s group chat, which had lots of messages from hours ago.

✉️ Nikki: Weeeeell…. I was casually checking the TikToks people were posting about the game… You know, to see how it was going

✉️ Nikki: THEN… Girl, you went a bit viral agaaaaain. You appeared on the big screen and SOME people saw the little interaction Mr. Jobe and you had. The football fandom is going crazy again, a lot of people are debating if you’re his girlfriend or Gio’s girlfriend

✉️ Mia: Since none of them had said a word about the rumors… People are kinda taking sides

✉️ Mia: I also saw that after the first half some girls were looking for you because they were near your seat and you were gone. Then they noticed you were sitting next to THE Jude Bellingham and went on trying to figure out if you were his girlfriend instead while taking videos and photos to POST?!

✉️ Nikki: MESSY

✉️ Oh god… I just saw this… WHY ME, LORD?!

✉️ It’s like… For each day of peace I get, ten days of absolute chaos are piled up on my door

✉️ Nikki: It’s the drama, the fun, the footballers, the fame

✉️ Nikki: Our beautiful little WAG

✉️ Mia: If it’s not with douchie, it’s with that Gio guy

✉️ Mia: Heʼs hot af

✉️ Mia???? 

✉️ Do you want his number?

✉️ Nikki: Omg, Miaaaa

✉️ Mia: Both of you… Shut up. This isn’t about me finding Gio the hottest man alive, this is about YOU getting shipped with half of the footballers you know

✉️ Don’t remind me of that, please

✉️ I’ll better get some sleep before the vein on my forehead explodes, bye my loves

✉️ Nikki: Bye baby! Sweet dreams

✉️ Mia: Score a goal!

✉️ Fuck you lmao

Great. You were never getting rid of that stupid “popularity” among the football fanbase… Well, at least among the people that cared about the player’s love lives. They knew your face now, even if the subject of who your “boyfriend” was died down. You were out there forever for people to see and have an opinion.  

Time to sleep.

You were on your way to turn off the lights and wash your cup when the telecommunicator started to ring; you almost let out a scream. Who on Earth was ringing your house at two A.M?! With your heart beating like crazy, you ran to answer and yell to the jerk on the other side. 

“Miss! I’m so sorry to bother you this late but…” Mel’s words were interrupted by some loud male voices. “There’s a couple of gentlemen asking me to allow them into your floor…” Oh, poor Mel. 

You couldn't scream to your sweet doorman Mel.

“Mel! Hi... Gentlemen? As... Men asking to come here?” This was unbelievable.

“Yes, uh. They'd been here for at least ten minutes. I'd tried to persuade them into leaving but nothing works."

“Do you happen to recognize these gentlemen?” Your gut feeling was very reliable, so you kinda knew who it was. 

“Well… I’m not so sure about it, but I think that’s… Bukayo Saka and Jude Bellingham, miss.” 

He surely knew them at first sight, but it was adorable he was trying to dissimulate it.

“Oh, my god…” You sighed. When was this going to end? “Just… Let them in, Mel.”

“As you wish.” 

You wanted to punch someone so bad right now. But you just stayed there, by your door, waiting for what seemed to be the night of never end.

No less than five minutes later, your door was being punched at. Because that wasn't a knock. You considered for a moment letting them outside, but you weren't going to sleep if you did that. 

When you opened it, the silliest sight welcomed you. There was Bukayo, a mutual friend that you haven't seen in very long, carrying (if you can call that carrying) a very drunk Jude. How did you know he was drunk? Well, he was (seemingly) asleep against Bukayo's side, only kept from falling because of his friend's arm around his waist. 

“Okay...” Was the first thing that came out of your mouth. “This is... Something.”

“So sorry to do this at such late hours... He's been so insistent. He got a bit too drunk and started to ask about where his girlfriend was and that he wanted to come home.” Bukayo's eyes went blank, sighing. He seemed pretty sober to you. “I tried to persuade him into visiting you tomorrow, but this guy never takes no for an answer.”

“That sounds like him.” You smiled at him apologetically. Because what else could you do? No one knew you two had broken up, and this wasn't the best moment to break the news either. “Let's take him to the couch, I'll help you.”

You got closer, feeling the smell of alcohol reeking from Jude. Iugh. You took one of his arms, putting it around your shoulders. Hah, and just a couple of hours earlier you were trying to avoid just that. With a lot of effort, both of you laid him out the best you could. That didn't mean that it was done in the most careful way. So he woke up, looking at you and then at Bukayo. 

“Am I dreaming, mate?”

“Nah, fam. I did what you asked me; I took you to your girl.” He palmed Jude's arm and then smiled at you. “Now I'm out, this whole thing tired me up.”

“That's okay. Thank you for taking care of him.” You gave him a little hug after guiding him to the door. “I hope we can catch up another time without this type of thing going on.”

“Me too.” He smiled again, looking as sweet as ever, and then turned and left. 

Now you were alone with...

“Darling?” Oh no, not the darling. 

You turned, looking at Jude, who was struggling to keep himself sat upright. He was looking at you with the most drunken-hazed eyes ever, accompanied by the biggest of smiles.

“Yes, Jude?” It was better not to argue with a drunk person this late at night.

“Can I tell you something?”  

“Yeah, sure.” You got closer, sitting on the carpet. Not too close, but not too far away from him. “What is it?”

“I'm an idiot. I'm so dumb, I got drunk tonight, and I miss you.” The smile left his face, but he was still looking at you with happy eyes. “Every time I see your face, I remember that I'm mad dumb for breaking up with you. Because I still love you. A lot.” He let himself fall back into the couch pillows, sighing. “I don't know why I panicked so much a month ago. It was a stupid chat.”

“Sorry?” Your heart was beating fast because of his past confessions, but this new phrase caught your attention way more. “What chat?”

He wasn't looking at you. He was just looking up at the ceiling, like he was trying to remember something.

“Just some stupid chat the coach gave us before you arrived at Dortmund that day... He was talking about how we, as professionals, had to settle in earlier so we didn't get carried away because of all the money and parties... And the drugs. He said that there was a reason for footballers to get married and have kids at such young ages.” He sighed again, looking tired. “And I knew he was talking to the younger part of the team, which included me... I just... I felt like I was being pressured to marry immediately... I got so carried away with my thoughts that I panicked when I saw you. You make me so happy, but I didn't feel ready for any of the coach's options.”  

“So... You broke up with me instead of talking?” Woah. “That's fucked up, Jude.”

“I know... And I'm not asking you to forgive me or... Get back together with me... Even though that's what I have been wishing since I said the words, but... I wanted you to know.”

He didn't seem drunk at all now. 

“Thank you for telling me.” That's all you could say for now. Too much information to take in. 

“Would you have said yes?” He asked after a few minutes of silence, still looking at the ceiling. 

“To what?”  

“Marrying me.”

You felt like someone punched your heart and took the air out of your body. At the same time. 

“I won't answer that.” Mostly because you didn't know the answer. “Get some sleep.” You got up, looking down at him. 

“Why not?”

You took a long look at his face. You gave him a little smile, reaching for his cheek with one of your hands. You caressed it with the tip of your fingers before regretting touching him at all. He closed his eyes, but opened them when you retrieved your hand. 

“Because there's no point in answering something that's not going to happen.”

He frowned, looking offended for a second before relaxing his face again. 

“Well, I haven't asked you.”

“And you shouldn't, because that's something you do when you're sure about it... And not drunk.” You took one of the covers you kept close, tucking him on the sofa so he couldn't move. “And when you're in a relationship, of course. Now sleep or I'll kick you out of my house.”

“Okay...” He appeared so similar to a kid now, all flustered and with big eyes. “I'm sorry for all of this.”

“I forgive you.”

And that was true. You forgave him for all of it. You couldn't hold a grudge forever. It wasn't healthy. 

“Really?” Hope sparkled in his eyes. It made your heart ache.

“I promise.”

Then you got closer and kissed his forehead to prove him right about your words. He gave you the biggest of smiles, again, before falling asleep right there. You gave him a last caress on the cheek before turning the lights off and walking towards your bedroom.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

You thought it was impossible to get any sleep after what happened, but the moment your head touched the pillow, you were out. The stress was draining your energy. You blacked out until the next morning, when a knock on the door woke you up. 

You remembered everything that had happened just a couple of hours ago. There was Jude, knocking on your door like he was a stranger. Somehow, it felt like it. 

“Come on in.” You said after a few seconds, rubbing your face.

The door slowly opened up. Jude was still covered in the blanket, holding it together with one hand below his chin while the other rubbed his eye. Pretty much the same as you. You couldn't help but smile a little at the sight. 

“Good morning.” Even his voice had a little hint of shyness.

“Did you sleep well?” Was all you said while you got up and walked towards the bathroom.

“Yes...” He followed you, just two steps behind. “Thank you.”

“Stop saying 'thank you', just come here and brush your teeth.” You grabbed one of the brand new toothbrushes you kept in the drawer, offering it to him. 

He seemed so scared yet happy about your behavior while taking the toothbrush. You weren't fooling anyone, it was fun to play with his mind a little bit. Payback.

He stood there watching you brush your teeth, wash your face, and brush your hair. It was very funny.

“I'm not going to suddenly take a knife out and follow you around the house with it, Jude. Get cleaned or you won't get breakfast.” You got out of the bathroom, smiling at him when he just blinked at you. “All yours.” And then you left him alone in there.

You entered the kitchen, ready for some breakfast. You heard the bathroom sink go on and off for a few minutes. Meanwhile, you decided to make some scrambled eggs with ham and toast some beagles. It was the best you could offer with so many thoughts taking most of your concentration. 

When you were finishing the second plate, Jude appeared by the door and stayed there. He looked at the plates with surprise, like it was actually impossible for you to be making breakfast for him. 

“It's getting cold.” You offered him one of the plates that was already sitting on the mini table you had available. 

“Are you preparing me for my sudden death, darling?” He sat in front of you, waiting for you to take the first bite. He always did that. 

“Not yet.” You took a bite off the beagle, smiling when he did the same. “Maybe after I eat.” 

He smiled but didn't say anything. You ate in silence, looking at each other from time to time. You felt different around him now that you knew what caused him to break up with you. It wasn't that you suddenly forgot about everything else or how mad you felt, but it made things easier. You wanted to talk. Now there was a real reason for it. 

“I'll wash the dishes.” Before you could say anything, he took both plates and stood up. 

“Go ahead... And after you finish them, we'll talk.”

“Do I make some tea first?” 

“Yeah, that'll be nice.” 

He seemed to understand what was crossing your mind, so he made the tea quietly and walked to the living room. You followed him. 

“Well...” You took a sip of the tea. “Do you remember what you said last night?” 

“I do...” He squirmed on the seat. He was nervous. “I wanted to tell you all that sober but... I fuck up things quite regularly.” 

You smiled, shaking your head. 

“Okay, it's good for the sake of this conversation that you remember everything. Now, when I said that I forgive you, I meant it. But that doesn't mean I'm not angry or hurt by all of it.” He nodded. “I'm still disappointed about how poorly you managed the whole thing; you just needed to talk to me, and the breakup would never have happened.”

“I know.” He covered his face, sighing. “I'm an idiot.” 

“Yeah! Look at me, I spent a month thinking you didn't love me anymore, and it turns out that you just were a bastard that didn't know how to talk to his girlfriend.” You slightly pushed his arm with your foot. “You said you didn't love me as you used to... Why?” 

“I don't know.” He groaned, taking his hands off his face. “I guess I wanted you to hate me. I’ve never stopped loving you.” He grabbed your ankle, dragging your leg closer to his body. “I think I love more than before, actually.” 

You didn't say anything for a while, you just looked at him for the longest time, trying to figure out what to do next. 

“I'm very mad at you.” You took a deep breath. “That club thing you did after we broke up is still fresh in my mind. I can't pretend everything is the same just because we talked.” 

“I know. I'm a jerk for doing that. I just wanted to see if... If I could act like I was okay. I wanted to feel okay. And couldn't accept that I regretted breaking up with you the second you left.” 

“Always your big ego, huh?” You laughed. “Don't take this as if we just got back together. We're... We're friends from now on.” 

“We are friends for now.” He said, smiling. “Because I'll do everything that's in my power to win you back.”

“Whatever you say, Bellingham.”

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[bambieyedoll]

i saw ur bella hc on my feed and i am instantly obsessed, faster than the speed of light ‼️🥹 can i request an hc where its a looking from afar sort of thing? like bella is rlly known now but also musician reader 🤭 like would they fangirl ab each other on public or privately? would they meet?AAAAAAAAAAAAAA 😫

hi, baby ! aw, that’s so sweet. thank you so much for that, it means a lot to me. here it is, i hope you like it, love. ♡

bella would be obsessed the moment they hear your voice on the radio while driving home from work. would quickly download your album that same night feeling intrigued by you.

in a couple of days, they already watched every interview and stalked your social media.

the way you expressed, both through your art, your songs, and in interviews, made them wish they could talk to you, desire holding a conversation with you.

you were just mesmerizing to bella.

would listen to your songs every day without fail. it relaxed them whenever they were feeling tired or overwhelmed because of their work.

the effect you had on them was something else.

you’d have them fangirling in secret whenever you posted on instagram or released a new song.

bella would keep you for themselves. just gatekeeping you, holding onto the feeling of you being a treasure they had found and only they knew.

you knew them and admired their work dearly too.

bella’s work on the series the last of us was just breathtaking. you found yourself every sunday sitting on your sofa with a snack watching new episodes.

you stalked bella’s instagram too.

your curiosity about them as a person grew and you loved watching their interviews. adored listening to their opinions and point of view about the series.

you wouldn’t dare to follow them on instagram tho.

your shy nature wouldn’t let you. however, you did posted your tv screen with the tlou intro one sunday.

when bella watched your story using their secret acc, they went nuts. they would let out a little squeak and giggles. the happiness was so real.

would go all shy afterwards. knowing you watched their work and not only that, you’ve been watching them every sunday.

the day you finally followed them, bella would be on could nine. immediately following you back, to your surprise and delight.

two little cuties staring at their phones in their respective houses. totally oblivious to the admiration and the (massive) crush you had on each other.

bella would think about texting you a hundred times after you officially became mutuals on ig.

wouldn’t do it due to their shyness and nervousness.

honestly, bella would open your dm’s, write something, read it five times, then delete it and exit the app. just overthinking the whole thing.

you, on the other hand, would feel courageous after following them and getting a follow back. so one day, you deep breathed and wrote to them first.

just imagine the moment bella woke up one day and saw your message on their dm’s.

they would double blink just to make sure they were awake and it wasn’t a dream.

from that day on, bella and you would text though instagram and share your mutual admiration.

bella would flag your chat to make sure your was the first one they’d see.

would get to know each other more and more in just a couple of days then they would officially ask for your number with some cute excuse like wanting you to be able to call them if you needed anything.

bella wouldn’t get over the excitement of having gotten your number.

would add your contact with a lovely heart after your name and then smile to themselves at how pretty it looked.

talking to each other would became a daily need.

your day wouldn’t be complete without your “good morning” and “sweet dreams”.

they’d give you smooth little compliments every here and there, making you blush through the phone.

you would also start to videocall. making it even more personal but also difficult to hide the effect you had on each other.

the first videocall was a mix of adorable pink painting both your cheeks, nervous giggles and glowing eyes glancing at each other.

for real, they wouldn’t be able to focus being well aware that your soft gaze was directed at them through the screen of their phone.

sometimes, you would sing to them obeying their adorable demand.

the song was up to their choice but when they said you could sing what you choose you opted for a verse of “glue song” and that made their heart go crazy.

bella’s crush on you would grow to the point they started to think about you even more constantly.

asking you on a date would be on their mind 24/7.

the day they finally asked you out (after planning it on detail) it was though a video call you both had before going to sleep.

it was something you started doing, finding comfort in your conversations that sometimes lasted until late night before wishing each other sweet dreams.

you immediately would say yes while nodding slightly with the purest smile just for them.

bella would let out a happy “yes!” in celebration after you ended the call and went to sleep feeling like the most fortunate person alive.