#so like. ya gonna have to deal with me.
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this was iconic actually chip wingman W
(referencing episode 25 (1:13:00))
#rewatching old episodes and gaHhhhh#chip aslana friendship so good. people that feel the weakest in their trio solidarity#aLso with this episode… the dastardly foreshadowing….#between chip saying he doesn’t trust himself with a live beating heart so it’s given to gill#and gill being the one to stab through widow’s hearts as chip trusts that gill knows chip’s heart#or his talk with aslana about how she’s not a monster it was the curse not her#while simultaneously feeling like a monster when he gets cursed#not to mention the Entire Song#and uGHh chip saying he’ll have a plan to keep gill from getting gooped by his deal is totaLLy gonna come back to bite us#like i can totally see him pulling some bs sacrifice and as chip goops instead him being like told ya i had a plan 🥴🥴#jrwi riptide#art by me#chip jrwi#aslana jrwi#gillion tidestrider#also the drawing is to be silly chip was totally trying to wingman there#he got a taste and thinks she should get one too <3#now that’s friendship <33#though he did make a joke about her eating his toe right before MFBSKDBDN
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6x10 | The Next World
#richard pls#Rick Grimes#*#rg#S6#rick swearing is supreme 🌟#but ya know....america#SO SWEATY#looks like he stopped over for a little swim#excuse me but the nose™️#i love me some annoyed rick#someone should have been kneeling waiting every time he had to deal with someone's crap#i volunteer#gonna invest in those kneeling pads people who garden a lot use first though
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Aka Riders Lullaby from Centaurworld
Lay your head on my chest so I can sing you a lullaby and gently run my fingers through your hair until you slowly drift off to sleep 🥰🫶
#I got some microphones on a super good deal and I wanted to try it out 🥰#also I’m finishing centaurworld and I love it so so so so much#I got an ask recently#and I think it might have been the sweetest ask I’ve received#and that’s saying something#cause all of you guys are sweeties!!!#but basically they were complimenting my voice#and if you don’t know voice compliments are probably top tier for me#obviously love personality compliments and all that but voice compliments hit me fucking deep#I’m going to reply to that ask soon#just whenever I get a super sweet ask that BLOWS me away I need a little bit to recover and find the right words to say!#anywhoodedoodly#I was crying while I was driving and singing my heart out#and remembered my microphones!!#was gonna do some sort of heavy ballad but I’m too much of a perfectionist right now#gotta start small#idk if I’ll keep this up or I’ll remake it#cause I always feel like I could do better ya know??#me#mine#rosicheeks#singing
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I honestly just don’t get how people default to thinking southern accents are like unserious and unintelligent, I know I live in a bubble and I’ve never been outside of the south so like my world view is skewed but like idk I can’t like conceptualize hearing someone’s accent and going “your accent is too stupid and silly for you to have a brain” like ???
#deity dialogue#sorry I’m rlly half asleep#obvs my worldview is different cause I’m southern I’m surrounded by southern ppl I hear the accent all the time#so it’s like normal obvs but idk it still baffles me#idk if I ever go north are y’all gonna be mean to me cause I talk in a way that y’all perceive as stupid and lesser than how you do??#I’ve already mentioned that even here we aren’t safe from the ‘haha youre a dumbass southern hick’ statements#which is rich cause like bitch who are you to be talking you live here too I don’t wanna hear you call me a red neck cause you’ve been here#for a long ass time to and I’m sure if you went up north they’d be on your ass the same way they’d be on mine#like what gives you the right?#like I will say also that I do make fun of the accent but in the way that lexi and I will be heatedly talking and get more southern with#each word and that amuses and delights us like idk it’s fun to look at someone who just said one word in a more extreme southern accent on#accident and repeat it back to them#but like at the end of the day we like being southern we don’t think there’s anything wrong with it or like inherently worth mocking#plus there’s a difference between two friends being silly and strangers telling you you’re a stupid redneck hick :)#this is also coming from someone who compared to other southern ppl doesn’t have the most strong southern accent (it’s there onvs but ya#know) and I still have to deal with this shit :/#sorry I need to go to bed and shut up no one caressss
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Crying screaming throwing up and etc
#I’ve been in such a weird and bad mood lately I don’t even fucking know why#like the smallest things are making me so mad and i feel like im gonna cry constantly#and literally for no reason like what am I even upset about? couldn’t tell ya!#but at least I have like. a week and a half off work#gonna have to take my tshot a day early and then a day late so I don’t have to take it on the plane which I k ow I COULD do but I don’t want#to deal with it honestly. so we shall see what does to my mental state
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rahh guess whose bored and also back
#ahhhhwagoowakagableh#I am actually alive I swear#no the Chloeitis did not get me#but it sure is goddamn TRYIN bro#ALSO. GUYS.#GUESS WHO HAS M E D I C A T I O N#ya boi got put on ZOLOFT of all things#it's been a mess. but I think it's gonna be worth it#and and and and and!#I have arrrrrts#no fics yet though. been pokey.#mostly been away to deal with above mentioned 'pen on zoloft' deal#I have been SO...YEAH.#just yeah I have been very yeah#I am so glad that woman gave me anxiety meds as needed with it because I was gonna NEED it on this other bitch lol#try going from 0 to 60 heart rate for like. no reason#please I just wanted to do the eepy#and a lot of other shit happened this month too and a lot of it is really. bad.#but I'm trying to NOT think about any of that and just be whatever I am and do whatever I'm doing#I'm sorry this is so long I didn't want to make a real news thing#I was lazy and also yknow. the hate spam lol#but YEAH if you made it this far hi hello I am alive yaaay#time to abuse my PPAA children again :3#and my mutuals while I'm at it-#HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE
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.
#im in so much fuckin pain i cant move ugh#like. typing this is excruciating#but i cant just stare at the wall or im gonna lose it eventually ugh#my pain is getring progressively worse these days and the last 2 months have been hell#doctors r worried this might be my new normal for the time being#which. uh#SUCKS#bc i cannot stand or walk for more than 5 mins#and i need a walker w me bc my cane isnt enough#and most days i am trapped in bed (or on the couch if i can make it there) unable to take care of myself#bc everything hurts and i feel like i'm being tortured#oh and my lordosis & the related pain is now at a level that might need serious medical intervention#my migraines r out of control#my joint problems r also way worse#and u kno what ? i would like to die now#thanks#truly and genuinely#im so done#i cant keep going this way#my doctor has no idea what to do#and the pain clinic im a patient of refuses to help further unless i sign up for their ridiculous pain education program#which is 8 weeks long with mandatory in-person weekly attendance (i do not live near it & cant afford transportation)#where they tell u all the ways ur pain is ur own fault and give u unrealistic and ridiculous advice abt exercise and lifestyle changes#that u Cannot do bc of said disabilites and pain#jfc#our healthcare system is broken and nobody cares if i live or die or suffer#AND im stuck dealing w my mother complaining abt my existence nonstop bc she resents me for the things i cannot do independently#so u kno what ya i am done. im so done. i give up#catch me rotting in this bed forever until i die. thats the only option being given to me
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The desperate yet guilty anxiety that comes from having to essentially beg for accommodations from my college professors is an emotion I wish I was less familiar with
#beastiebites#didnt get shit officially last year so had to ask all my professors individually for extension when i needed#and idk if ill get anything this year so Im once again resorting to oversharing in a desperate attempt to get ny professors to understand#Im fucking disabled and mentally ill and I need deadline extensions like i need water#i feel awful about it though its sorta fuckin humiliating to have to write an email that is me on my hands and knees praying they wont#think im trying to get out of work#im passionate about these classes and i wanna learn so bad Im just#so fuckin mentally ill rn#and i need help#but i dont have access to the help I need#so im just sorta#slowly watching as i become more and more despondant and emotionally drained#and struggle to do basic fucking tasks#Im sorry im just tired and stressed#gonna go to sleep and hopefully feel a little better in the morning#tw vent#vent post#actually autistic#actually adhd#anyways i wish everyone a good day and i hope you have spoons to deal with whatever bullshit life throws at ya
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i thuink i might finally be mentally stable unphased by horror and gore enough to actually play ddlc for myself
#BC I ALWAYS WANTED TOO the first thing i wanted to do when i got a laptop for thefirst time. is play ddlc for myseld#but then iwas like no ill get scared. so i never did.#is it still freee is ddlc still free. if not i have it on my hacked 3ds. so ill play it there.#honestly even if it is bc like. im running low on laptop space.#what if i just played it and then stopped right before things go fucky. what if i did that .#i wont ill properly play it. but yk#and ya my whole thing was like aah i wanna kms kinda or have strugged with tht if i play ddlc itll trigger some stuff for me#now im like. thats kinda gone down. but now its more that i can kinda deal with gore a bit more. so yk. ig makes up for it#also crazy cause i watched a play thru when i was like. 14. maybe even 13 ? so way too young#andi t freaked me TF OUTT but after i still watched a bunch more and play thrus of mods and was like. in the fandom.#i shipped natsuski and yuri . who didnt .#so its kinda funny tht im like. 19 and cautious abt playing a game i was in the fandom of at 14. but yk#im still gonna play it maybe rn. yipee bye .#flappy rambles
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I always get so angry but then I play video games and I'm no longer so angry
This is a problem when it comes to wanting to leave my shit ass job
#speculation nation#i was absolutely ranting with my coworker about this shit#if either of us leave we're both going. straight up.#boss was threatening to fire them and im like. if he does? im quitting on the fucking spot.#i dont have a job lined up yet but im gonna start seriously looking#and if it comes down to it i dont think itll take too long for me to find Something. not with my qualifications.#might not be the best paying job right away but so long as i have Something & it doesnt make me utterly miserable#itd still be better than this fucking shithole.#i used to love this place but everything has soured because of him.#ive toughed it out for Far too fucking long. and ive finally reached the end of my Fucking Rope.#8 years total of my life ive given to this store. but no more.#it's not a matter of 'if'. it's a matter of 'when'.#and once we leave at least 2 of the other seasoned employees will be leaving.#4 out of 6 of the fully trained drink makers. gone.#and the other 2 are leaving at the end of this semester Anyways.#so what are ya gonna do Boss Man? if our labor has really been that worthless to you then surely this will be no big deal!#right? right? right? from how youve treated us it's clear! it's clear you take us for granted and dont give a shit about us as people.#so youre gonna get a rude fucking awakening Very soon. have fun cleaning up the wreckage of your mockery of our lives.#anyways hi yeah shit's about to blow up at work and im jumping ship as soon as i can make it work#i also got caught in freezing rain and had to walk home (took an hour of walking when itd usually take 25 mins!) bc i Could Not Bike#may or may not have to go into work tomorrow and if i do i may just take a hammer to those fucking windows [joke][this is a joke]#its gonna ice all night and i voiced these legitimate concerns for my safety and got told#'well we'll follow what the city standards are' or whatever the fuck. and got told to take the bus.#WELL COME ON SHITSTAIN I STILL HAVE TO WALK TO THE BUS STOP NOW DONT I??????#plus i just dont like the idea of going out rn at all. it's so dangerous. im for serious Everything is ice.#even on a salted road my bike still slid out from under me. i Had to walk it home#walking very very carefully with very ginger steps. lord help me on any inclines bc gravity was pushing me Down.#it was awful. one of the worst commutes of my life. and this fucker has the audacity to tell me to just Take The Bus?#hes getting on my last Fucking nerves. oh yeah and him completely dismissing my coworker's concerns about passive aggression#ran out of tags (lmfao) so ill stop ranting here. but just. i am so Fucking done with him.
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On another note since I can't find my Okami game and before my brain can keep blowing it out of proportion (who cares if the disk is gone is saves to the Wii console not the fucking disk calm your tits brain I can still be a Pomeranian for shits and giggles if I want fuck you) I've been thinking about the Staffbot situation again...
Fucking hell was the staff party actually to round them up and kill the human staff?? Why??? For what purpose??? Were the Staffbots essentially just overcomplicated remote control cars with no AI built in so they used these people as the AI??? Do they want revenge??? Freedom??? Death??? Will they ever get it??? Where did their bodies go??? How has no one noticed so many missing people??? How would you even free them??? Fire??? Some sort of master controller that's preventing their souls from moving on??? Can Roxy see them???
That whole situation is wild and it feels so over the top given everything else that's happening. Like, bro, do we really need more shit happening??? Come on...
#yes my brain has been cooking some spooky ghost shit where Roxy is fucking HAUNTED by these guys#why?? because she has special eyes. she can't actually see what's wrong but looking at them too long makes her whole head spin#but all they know is she can see SOMETHING please oh PLEASE remember them please set them free she's the only one that can see#and so her ass is HAUNTED and she's losing her god damn mind cause are you KIDDING???#as if she doesn't have ENOUGH to deal with????#first storyteller then glitchtrap now this?? ON TOP of mimic???? fucks sake she's NOT paid enough for this#it's WILD to me because like. it looks like I'm being all 'haha blorbo has to deal with EVERYTHING' but think about it#if anyone would know what's going on or that something's wrong or be able to see what Fazbear doesn't want them to...#it's gonna be Roxy.#canonically a part of the MXES security system. canonically can see through walls talks to herself and stares at people through them#has a 'fuck you I know what I'm doing' attitude too?? yeah she's burdened with knowledge. it makes sense!#AND there's Vanny I forgot about that I just sorta categorise her with Glitch but they're separate entities I keep forgetting#like come on no wonder she's obsessed with winning if she loses someone's probably gonna die#but the insane part is that not only did she not sign up for this#neither did fucking Fazbear who gave her this ability to see everything#they were like 'hurdurdurdur guard mimic wurrburdurrr'#and then gave her the ability to see all the other fucked up shit and they thought 'well that's not her job she won't care'#and then OBVIOUSLY she DOES care what the FUCK do you MEAN she WOULDN'T care about fucking DEAD BODIES#are you JOKING#ya know??? yeah#it's insane#ya girl is DROWNING
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Girl I’ve kinda been seeing decided to be weird about me being ace time to nix that ig
#I am definitely not really broken up about it at all#I mean she was nice (before this anyways lol) but like… we didn’t really have much in common and I had p much come to conclusion I didn’t#wanna date her anyways but fjfjkdkskskd#it started because she was like ‘oh we’ve only been hanging out we haven’t done anything else :( are you not into me?’#and I’m sitting here like ‘oh well I thought we were just getting to know each other’#but I told her look I’m not opposed to physical intamcy (sexual or otherwise) but I’m ace so my relationship to that is a bit different#and it’ll pretty much be up to you to instigate when you want to do that and not expect me to because of how I operate#and she was like ‘oh…. right….. okay then maybe we can talk about that later’#which I guess isn’t a HUGE red flag but ive seen another of my ace friends put up with the worst shit in relationships#because her partner didn’t accept her asexuality right out the gate and ya know I don’t wanna deal with that#plus just all the other things I mentioned above#anyways had my experimental dating phase decided I didn’t like it#going straight back to my platonic and queerplatonic relationships and not looking for anything else I much prefer these#I mean if something happens it happens ig but I’m not gonna go looking for it again lmao#this was mostly a vaguely…. awkward and uncomfortable experience#kaz rambles
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most of the schools i went to were catholic to its rlly surprising that i never had any type of religion class. it didnt actually affect anything other than us being made to stand in line and pray before class (and also sing the national anthem) but like you could just, Not do that and be chill
#i did go to catechism classes as a kid but that only lasted for a few months#i was 9 i think or 10#kinda diff subject but i have a lot of memories of being 10-11 and figuring out religion#a lot of my memories for that time period are Gone I Am Memory Issues Man but not those for some reason#babies first independent thought <3#i remember first doubting what i knew about god when i was like 7? but i shelved that until 5th/6th grade#as ive repeatedly brought up in this blog my sister died when i was in 5th grade which caused my parents to double down on the catholicism#at the same time i had found Atheist Progressive Facebook Pages and doubting everything#they made a routine of every day before bed reading me a passage from the bible and i had to sit there like yas queen so true#but me and this friend from school were heaving deep philosophical talks about religion dailyyyyyyyy#she reached the conclusion of god not being real a bit before me and i remember mentioning to my parents how i dont think thatd mean she#was gonna go to hell in one of the Nightly Bible Sessions#before i reached that conclusion i actually adopted the line of thinking thay god Was real#he just sucked ass and was a terrible being. and also fuck christianity#tho a few months later i went full atheist#one time me and that friend were on a fucking amusement park ride discusding religion. thats still funny to me#also a while later my mom started dipping her toe in other religions mostly as she tried to figure out how to deal w my sister dying#she got into spiritism and took me to like a. idk. lecture???? sermon??? i did not care so i daydreamed lesbian ever after highxmonster high#fanfiction during it. 👍#my dad also gave me a very long talk about how my mom was being tempted by the devil at that time which like. ok#also at age 11 the last time i went to church happened. it was on the 1 year anniversary of my grandpa dying (which also happened in 5th#grade) and his name was gonna be mentioned. i was already atheist then and i felt Very out of place. also intried convincing my younger#cousin the tooth fairy was real doing it#oh and i can never forget how i posted on facebook telling my extended family that i was an atheist and then my aunt held a prayer session#at her house while me n the other kids were playing and Loudly talked about how parents who let their children be atheists are doing the#devils work or whatever. or the family friend that told my mom the reason my sister died was bc my mom didnt go to church regularly#my mom didn't go to church regularly bc my sister was dying and she was busy trying to prevent that. lmao.#my sister dying actually had nothing to do w me questioning religion but literally everyone seemed to think so at the time. theyd be like#i know you might be angry at god because of your sister.... and i was like? no bitch theres just no scientific proof that guy exists what#oh there are so many typos and mistakes in these tags im not editing that. good luck
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I think a 10yo just got attached to me in genshin and if this keeps up its gonna make me not wanna play cuz I don't wanna come off as mean if I have to tell her to give me some space, but I wanna play in peace ya know?
#she came into my world i think saturday night or sunday morning. thats how long i played. and chatted for a minute then left#then the second i logged on this morning she immediately hopped in and started calling me Ed#and she was asking questions and im polite so i answered and she was like you can ask me questions#and since she asked how old i was i asked back snd she was all uh um well im 10#and thats fine to me cuz im not gonna be a weirdo anyway#but then she asked if i had a wife and i said no im not interested in girls so thats probably when she was sure i was a safe adult#and someone else joined and she dm'ed me that she didnt like him and right after he left so did she#and when i opened my world back up later she immediately popped in again#and wanted me to go to whatever a playstation party is while i was doing a quest and i had to politely tell her no twice#and then it segwayed into material hunting with her so i could still do something productive in game at least#but at one point she called me her bff and started talking about how she just got a phone#and im worried she may end up asking for my number or something. like hell nah#like. im all for being friendly and playing a game together and casual chatting. again. i have no intention of EVER being a weirdo#but shes coming off as immediately REALLY attached and i dont need to be going through shit like that again#ive had people get REALLY attached to me in some games previously and not leave me alone while im trying to play#and then they blow up at me when i ask for some space. so i dont wanna deal with that again#especially from a 10yo. i really dont wanna upset anyone by rejecting them or asking for space#but sometimes its too much and i just wanna do what i want in the game#and i kinda really dont wanna have a 10yo tailing me the whole time i wanna play#especially cuz shes 10 ya know? friends are cool but im a little too old to be a bff to her imo#i think i'll just try keeping my world closed when i log off so i wont log on and she immediately pop in first thing#i dont wanna block her off completely cuz i dont mind if she comes by every once in a while. just not all the time ya know?#personal
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i'm tired of drawing generic ghouls. we are moving on to designing the specific band ghouls. who's shitting their pants in excitement abt it (me)
#obviously i have ALREADY designed omega. long ago. obviously#i am feeling a calling to the current ghouls rn. ghoulettes especially#like obviously the dream is to draw all the meliora-to-current-era ghouls eventually buuuuut. ya know. ya girl's got exams#and limited energy#speaking of energy guess who got her energu drinks fill today at the store. so maybe#not TODAY but in the near future. between studying. yea#like i'm just. i just wanna draw dewdrop#it is tumblr user coreyvoss's fault and maybe like marginally blix#priorities are ghoulettes INCLUDING MIST!!!! dewdrop aether swiss alpha#i have in mind like. they got their fully creecher lookin forms the very goat type. a fully human Disguise that is not going to look like#the human musicians that play as the ghouls tho. maybe just barely if what they look like Speaks to me but the idea is to have 5% max yk#like. i'm taking per's and mad gallica's hair and that's it type of deal#and THEN i have assigned them a bonus form that is some sort of mix of the human and demon forms simply bc i thought it would be#fun to design. there is no good reason like. in universe for a form like this to exist#i just KNOW it's gonna be a blast to design tho :) i still have to work out what it lools like but it'll be probably like.#just human w weird skintone&eyecolor + horns or smth. you know the type#that half assed demon bullshit you know the type. i will have a blast#obviously i'm designing the specific band ghouls in This <- form i just mentioned ofc obv ofc tbh ofc lbr irl#cool. i'm excited#oh nay
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me searching up anime movie endings before I watch them bc anime movies emotionally drain and exhaust me every time I watch them? more likely than you think.
#look i love anime movies but idk if id be able to deal with anime movie sad endings tbh#like anime movies are already so emotionally draining & exhausting and if they have a sad ending on top of that? id perish tbh#at least if ur gonna emotionally drain and exhaust me give me a happy or somewhat happy ending ya know#alexys talks
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