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tavs-brainworm · 5 months

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#couldn't get this out of my head so now you all have to see it #astarion #araj oblodra #bg3 memes #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion ancunin

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andthebeanstalk · 11 months

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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thetimelordbatgirl · 26 days

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The police in Scotland have the chance to do the most funniest thing right now.

#anti jk rowling #jk rowling #come on grant her wish #though imagine seeing laws coming in to deal with hate crimes #and just instantly throwing a childish style bigot fuelled tantrum #cause you wanna keep being a bigot without consquiences #its all freedom of speech until theres consquiences for said freedom of speech #and of course her fellow transphobes are trying to say the truth isnt a crime...what truth? transphobia???#it counts as a hate crime now not sorry if your in scotland #enjoy getting consquiences for your bigotry #also shout out to someone saying it'd be funny if they only did so they could raid a literal castle #i too think there's at least someone on the force itching to do that

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floccinaucinihilipilificationa · 10 months

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#selfie bee #good evening friends!! how are you doing! C:#I'm very very sleepy I got a new ikea office chair and I build it all myself #I think it went okay! I don't think I pulled the back screw tight enough and now the back is a bit loose #I can probably fix it but I can also ignore it for the next 18 years #thats how long the old chair held up!! in germany it could now drink vodka and drive a car!!#not at the same time that is illegal! not at the same time!! (❁´▽`❁)*✲ﾟ*#but the day is not over yet my uncle asked me for a big art quest and I do not want to disappoint #he wants a muppet tattoo and asked me to draw it #my uncle has started to get tattoos a few months ago #as far as I know he has now gotten 3 note clefs 3 stars a flower and multiple birds #he also started getting piercings but so far I managed not to know exactly where #I think tattoos are super cool (´｡･v･｡｀) I wish I had a good idea for a tattoo but the last time I was very sure about getting a tattoo #it was heath ledgers face as the joker #at that point I was 12 and would not see the actual movie for two more years #a muppet tattoo is a way better idea!! he asked for the count van count! that is also one of my top 3 muppets ₍՞◌′ᵕ‵ू◌₎♡#I always thought I knew a lot about muppet lore but since I started looking up muppet pictures I think there are still a lot of secrets #can the muppets from the Sesame Street actually leave the Sesame Street?#I think Kermit is both on the Muppet Show and on Sesame Street but he is also like the boss muppet #he might have special abilities #I hope you're having a good day friends!! C:#I think I'll post a Sherlock comic later this week #miss you!! ♥♥♥

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queerdraws · 8 months

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projecting on luffy again. get bited.

#zolu #luzo #one piece #p.s. i claimed to maximum amount of straw hat badges but im only allowed to display them on my main account 😥 they are with me in spirit #p.p.s. have you ever bit a soft upper arm #i think zoros unflexed muscly upper arms would be the most stimmy thing in the world to chew on #me when i see the pumpkinhead halloween luffy world collectible figure. bite.#or some of the unreleased gear5 figures esp the world collectibles #okay maybe im on a world collectible figure kick i just think they are sooooooooooooooo!!!! (≧∇≦) ( ๑ ˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و ♡#the markup to buy them used is insane tho ;__; so i just love them from afar #honorable mention to the new 20th anniversary action pose luffy with the haki arm and the big big fighting grin #and all babygirl zoros which i what i call zoro wearing any sunglasses but mostly filmz and filmgold sunglasses zoro #and when i see any art of my boys in their cowboy fits!!!!!!!#GGAAAAAH IM SO EXCITED I bought the ao cowboy shimmer print had to get it sent to someone in the states who will then ship it to me ;__;#<3 <3 <3 soon i will hold them. need to get some sort of wall display going for them and my zolu mail #okay okay ive ranted about a million things in the tags now. hope you enjoyed the bited. byeeeee

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egophiliac · 10 months

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IT'S BUNNY TIME EVERYBODY

(feat. Dilla)

(bugle accompaniment by Yuu)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #white rabbit festival #ah...the eternal dilemma of 'is it hair dye or whimsical anime hair'. and so we roll the dice again.#so it's canon now that yuu is inexplicably great at bugling. everybody get ready to incorporate that incredible trivia into your characters #anyway HELLO THERE madam spade #i think we have enough evidence now to say that you're not allowed into nrc unless you have an absolutely smoking mom #(riddle's mom has a smoking crater where her heart should be but we digress)#dilla likes two things: BIG VANS and also telling her son's friends all about how he used to literally refuse to not dress like a bunny #and yet now he does not wish to dress like a bunny. :( deuce what HAPPENED #meanwhile epel is too polite to whine at his best friend's mom so he's just hoping vil never finds out he wore a bonnet #silver is like 'i'm the handsomest little marching band boy. i'm taking this outfit back to show everyone.'#and ortho put all his points into POWERFUL THIGHS #he minmaxed leg day and is going to go kick a tree in half #can't wait for part 2 to see if they resolve the exciting cliffhanger of whether or not silver finds an alarm clock

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 7 months

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Get Their Ass.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #jin ling #jin chan #Yeah that's right. This guy is a named character. All those nameless disciples in the yi city arc and *this* guy gets a name.#Jin ling finally gets his much needed outfit upgrade! Rest in peace double straps.#I adore how we get to keep learning about Jin Ling and peeling back the layers on him...It's also so sad to see him so alone and friendless #especially knowing he really was starting to build peer friendships in the yi city arc...#Jin ling really is one of my top 5 characters in MDZS and its absolutely in part because of how you can *see* how he ended up this way #and we watch him learn and grow! He's doing what most adults refuse to do: Consider that his opinions are skewed and need to change.#You are NOT immune to propaganda and I adore characters who reflect and struggle with that!#Just because someone with assumed authority says something that fits into what you want to be true does not make it true B*/#In this series about rumours and warped perspectives - Jin Ling is a great example of how hard you have to work for the truth #+1 points of friendship with jin ling: He will self correct himself if he says a slur now

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 5 months

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i wanted to make an alternate more canon-compliant butterfly Howdy... similar but Different! the wings were a pain in my ass!

#tried to keep the basic vibes of the og look #incorporate the eyespots and all that #i just wanted to do this since the og look bothers me!#it was made for an au and so i leaned more towards a realistic butterfly look #this was a fun challenge!#i lied i hated it. coloring this made me want to toss my tablet in the trash #getting the wings to mesh.... Ugh....#scribble salad #yassified howdy <3 #so much fluff to contain!!!#i imagine that he got sally to tailor his shirts and stuff so his fluff could Fit #i think his apron would be blue now???#basically it and his blue striped shirt switch colors!#since he's already Very blue / cool colored #in my mind the spiral part of his wings is a little 3d and slightly Plush!#he's got some Texture to 'em!#as you all can see im a fan of gradients and Dots

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futuristichedge · 2 months

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Disability headcanons

#sth #sth fanart #blaze the cat #amy rose #silver the hedgehog #sonic fanart #my art #doodles #sonic disability headcanons #blaze #amy #silver #amy having a cane that transforms into her hammer is something that i think would be so fitting for her #one day ill do a masterpost with all my headcanons but for now you all just get to see snippets here and there #not that my headcanons are all that consistent anyway LOL but! Fun to imagine

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bitegore · 5 months

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Zionists want you to conflate Judaism and Zionism. Zionists want you to believe that Judaism cannot exist without Zionism and that all Jews are Zionists. Zionism would have Jews believe that a Jewish state is the only way that they can be safe from antisemitism and will point to any instance of antisemitism as proof that Zionism is the solution- so Zionism wants gentiles to be antisemitic in their support of Palestine. They want you to conflate all Jews with Zionism and the state of Israel, and they want you to treat all Jews regardless of political affiliation as the face of Israel. Antizionist Jews exist, and incidences of antisemitism ostensibly acting against Zionism will not help dismantle the forces propping Zionism up.

Don't do their work for them.

#red rambles #viva palestina #antizionism #i haven't actually seen a lot of antisemitism personally. not recently anyway. but that's more a feature of me not following antisemites #i DO however see a lot of people talking about the people they're seeing throw their support behind antisemites using palestine #as an excuse to conflate all jews with israel #and i cannot stress enough that that is literally what israel and zionist forces abroad WANT.#i am jewish. my entire family is jewish. i want to see palestine free. and i have SEEN how the jewish community gets conflated with israel #both from the inside and out #and i am dead serious when i say that every time someone is antisemitic it strengthens the conviction from people abroad #that it's a terrible sad situation but there's 'no other choice'#if you're being antisemitic you are doing the enemy's work for them. Stop it.#like... look. i am putting this in the tags bc im talking in the tags but i mean this. I do not give a single flying fuck if you personally #are a giant raging antisemite at the moment. Your personal beliefs are your problem and not mine. I do not fucking care. But if you are #being openly and loudly antisemitic *in your support of palestine* you are absolutely not fucking helping. I am so dead serious right now #if you want to raise awareness and you're being antisemitic because of deep held beliefs or whatever i want you to look around and read the #fucking room. Do you understand how much of Israel's international support comes from the idea that they are the only country where jews ar #safe from antisemitism? do you see how every time palestine comes up people point at incidences of antisemitism in anti-genocide actions to #discredit the entire movement? do you not understand how your actions are cutting the movement down at the knees?#i'm jewish and proud of it. i don't like antisemitism. but there's a genocide on and i'd rather work against it than quibble over who i #work alongside. i dont fucking care. you can be as antisemitic as you like in private. stop fucking the movement up.#there are bigger things to worry about here. if i can put aside my own concerns as to who i'm talking to you can hold your tongue #and fight the good fight instead of handing weapons to the people who are trying to fucking flatten gaza.

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elegyofthemoon · 2 months

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Global Strike on March 2nd

shutitdown4palestine has called for a global strike on 2nd March

What to do for 2nd March

Walk out from work and/or school

Picket Israeli embassies and consulates

Picket against companies that profit from Israel’s occupation of Palestine (Lockheed Martin, Boeing, Raytheon, Northrop Grumman, General Dynamics, Elbit Systems)

Host speak outs

Wear kuffiyehs

Wear black armbands

The website linked has further information about this strike as well as protests that may be occurring in your area.

Aside from this, as usual, boycott, call your reps, and donate when you can.

#palestine #free palestine #ceasefire now #ceasefire #free gaza #gaza #rafah #all eyes on rafah #i only just heard about this from twitter and i didnt see any posts about it here yet so i thought to share #i know its last minute at the very least i can get the word out now #march 2nd #global strike #march 2 #please reblog if you can to spread the word

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smash-chu · 3 months

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Long distance loneliness

#my art #doodles #smash-chu's art #not having the luxury of being able to just drive and see someone i know and love #having all my human connection come from digital screens when not visiting my family once or twice a year #it makes your heart sink down into a place that is hard to get out of #a place of acceptance that i will just have to live with being lonely #i love my friends #i just wish they weren't so spread out away from me #in a way i was left back here cause i was the only one that didn't move back to their parents #and now i struggle alone being comforted via keeping in touch online #but it can never replace seeing face to face #getting to be right there next to someone #touch starved is a understatement #but for now that is just how it has to be #anyways #my period is frying my brain making every feeling feel more intense so i feel super fucking alone right now #it's fine it'll go back to being numb soon enough #but sometimes you just need to let stuff out

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ecoamerica · 23 days

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youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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unproduciblesmackdown · 1 year

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Lackadaisy Enrichment

#in our enclosures!!#video linked as source; which i'm glad to see already has a million views and is trending. That's Right #lackadaisy #WHICH i have been reading since at least '07 when i was thirteen my god b/c this animation is based on the ongoing webcomic #like does its influence show up Directly in some Discrete way i can point to in my art? not very easily probably. And Yet.#the inspiration....i wasn't able to be Regularly Only for at least another year / art done Nonprofessionally Online was novel to me #like wow ppl can make & post fanart of w/e they love huh....didn't know webcomics were a thing & i never really read that many since but.#good god the quality of Lackadaisy at its onset is like this is superb?? this person putting in all their talent and effort???#and Then you get years & years more art and i don't even know what superlatives to throw out abt its quality as it evolves. obsessed w/it..#if i see a new lackadaisy comic page i Will be acting out. obviously this animation is a delight & also stunning. and fascinating to also #juxtapose as a Translation / Interpretation of the comic in a different medium & standalone snippet of Story #and that we're not even quite there in the comic timeline; Taking Notes abt character info we get distilledly here....genuinely love like #take it back to '07 i'm like oh boy can't wait for the dream team to assemble. then a decade later when it did? Oh Boy. that is payoff lol #namely hooray for stitches and mudbug at the field office for every passing gangster. killing one marigold associate but not the other #which seems like a promising start to shootouts w/the other dream team triumvirate. i adore that in canon so far mordecai freckle & rocky #have met but only over a nice brunch. re: all intentions anyways. anyways i'm like Gifs Must Be Made while i'm also so riled afresh abt the #comic that i've been sooo hype for for over fifteen yrs now babeyyy Deservedly. i've done a couple of rereads & ought to do another....#For Interest it'd probably take a few sittings to catch up from the start but there is much to be engaged over....this ongoing story that's #historical fiction prohibition bootlegging cats with plenty of focus on characters & several Mysteries. which i'm better at parsing now lol #like one of the more recent rereads like Oh Of Course x (probably) accidentally killed his y & z took the fall & that's a binding secret...#Not [oh of course] abt the circumstances surrounding a's death & how b & c were involved. nor the ''what's marigold's damage'' mystery #which is great. love to not know things. love that we can readily follow all the emergent drama everyone's wading in nowadays. hell yeah #anyways admire my organized approach to gifs here. four shots each Expressions Atmosphere Action Groupshots #sure might've muddled through gifmaking for this anyways but fr being a huge lackadaisy comic enjoyer for now most of my life helps #and its very Overall Inspiration like. just really getting the [you can really just draw stuff out here] going. fr the art's detail & skill #and that enrichment like i'm gonna have a great time following this. And I Have #you don't expect a crowdfunded indie animation in the mix back then but hell yeah fellas #SIGH ok removing a 4th gif that's broken / not displayed despite reuploading then entirely remaking it. if it's a bug i'll try again later

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stealingpotatoes · 9 months

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hands you all this cal to announce i’ve FINALLY finished fallen order (by which i mean i finally picked it up again after those couple hours i played a few months ago and then finished the whole game in 2 days lol)