#so shut the fuck up and fucking vote blue or choose to fucking die

[castielsprostate]

hey americans, please fucking vote this year! thanks!

signed,

the rest of the world

[ifmywishescametrue]

"You didn't deserve that... You deserve so much better." for buckytony pls 🤓

thank you for sending one! it got kind of out of hand lol so here's 2.2k of breaking up and making up. hope you like it!

Tony loses track of what the fight is about fairly quickly. He knows it started with what seemed like playful bickering, the kind their relationship was practically built on, but somewhere along the way the jabs turned much more pointed. Barbed wire wrapped around them, until each one was like a knife wound.

The first real cut came from him, he knows. Bucky's witty comment hit a little too close to one of his hundred insecurities, and reflex made him return it with too much sharpness. He can't blame Bucky for reacting, but they're both to blame for letting it get this out of hand. That’s not something that matters in the moment, though.

In the moment, all that matters is the careless insults and merciless words they lob back and forth. They chip away at each other and their relationship until it’s crumbling around them, but even that doesn’t matter. It becomes secondary to getting in the last word and one-upmanship, like it’s a competition for who can hurt who the most that they both desperately want to win, consequences be damned.

“You know this is why people keep leaving you,” Bucky says. “At some point it should be pretty damn obvious that it's you, not them.”

Tony laughs bitterly because the only other choice is crying. “Cause you're a real fucking prize, right? Bet people are just lining up to date a guy they're barely allowed to touch. And God forbid you ever try to do something nice for him, because it'll never actually be right.”

“Better than a guy with daddy issues so severe it'll take him two years to even tell you he loves you. Don't bother saying it in the meantime to him either, because he'll run off to hide for a week after each time.”

“Well, you know what, I'll make it easy for you, then,” Tony says, backing away to grab his jacket. “You don't have to worry about me and all my issues anymore.”

He forcefully shoves his arms into the sleeves and grabs his keys from the hook by the door. Bucky watches with a clenched jaw and doesn't try to stop him, not even when he pauses to give him the chance.

“What are you waiting for? Go ahead and run off. Prove my point.”

Tony shakes his head, an ache already forming in his chest that he ignores. “I’m not proving your point, because this isn’t running. This is breaking up with you because you’re a fucking asshole.”

He lets the door slam shut behind him and speedwalks down the hall, repeatedly pushing the elevator button. It doesn’t come quickly enough, and he flings open the door to the stairwell to rush down them. His vision blurs dangerously, and he can hardly see where he’s going, but he doesn’t slow down. The tears come freely with no around to see, until he’s out on the sidewalk and violently swipes them away with the back of his hand. He doesn’t pay attention to where he’s walking, only on getting as far away as possible.

Where he ends up shouldn’t come as a surprise to him. It’s muscle memory to come here at this point, a walk so familiar he could do it in his sleep and still manage to avoid all the cracks and uneven parts on the sidewalk on the way.

He stands outside of Shield’s Bar, neon lights coloring his face blue and pink, and he contemplates going in. It’s a Thursday, which means Clint is working the bar until midnight. Natasha will be waiting tables, and Steve will come in to replace her at ten.

All Bucky’s friends. He won’t get any of them in the breakup.

Steve will be the first to turn his back on him with his unwavering loyalty to his best friend. Clint will follow next because he hates tension and it’s the easier side to take. Natasha will be last, and she’ll claim that she loves them both and choosing sides is childish and ridiculous. But she’ll go, too, eventually. When none of her other friends will be in the same room as him, and all of their usual hangout spots become off limits. It’ll grow awkward and uncomfortable until promises to meet up turn into vague excuses and texts spaced months apart.

But where does he have to go if it isn’t here?

Rhodey’s on base in California, and Pepper moved back to New York the second her business degree was done. Staying in Boston was never the plan, not until Bucky and his found family welcomed him into their lives and made it feel like home. Where is there to go if home isn’t an option anymore?

He stands there long enough that people start to whisper as they pass by. They must think he’s lost his mind, staring blankly at a brick wall and hardly blinking, but he doesn’t hear what they say. Doesn’t hear anything but his own thoughts running in circles, going from anger to regret to shame and back again.

He wonders if Bucky’s right. If he truly is the reason it never works out. He knows he’s too insecure and emotionally unavailable. He demands too much and gives too little in return and doesn’t know how to communicate.

He used to watch his parents fight, orbiting around each other with avoidance and unspoken words until the dams broke and silence turned to screams, and he would swear that he would be better. If he was lucky enough to be in love with someone and have them love him in return, he would understand just how rare and beautiful that is and never take it for granted.

Easier said than done. Harder to face the fact that sometimes his words sound exactly like his father’s once did and sometimes he feels like his mother when he quietly lets himself be walked on and overlooked. The worst of both of them is tangled up inside of him, and it always kills whatever he touches.

Natasha finds him there eventually. She opens the door roughly, with intention that falters momentarily before she asks, “Do you plan on coming in at some point or are you staying out here all night?”

“I should probably go,” he says, quietly enough that it’s nearly lost to the wind.

Natasha watches him for a long moment, then steps out of the doorway to take his hand. She leads him over to an empty booth and slides into the opposite side.

“Aren’t you supposed to be working?”

She shrugs, “Steve will be here in a few minutes. No one’s going to die if they have to wait for their beer.”

Silence stretches on, and he stares down at his hands on the table. It’s warmer inside the bar, and he doesn’t realize that the cold has turned his fingers numb until they begin to unthaw.

“People coming in here were talking about some guy loitering outside. Some were saying he looked sad, some said lost. A few less optimistic people voted for strung out on drugs, but I think it’s safe to rule that one out now. Same with lost, seeing as you’ve been here a thousand times. That leaves sad, which means you had a fight with Bucky, and you didn’t come in, which means you think it’s your fault. Am I right so far?”

Tony nods, hanging his head low, and she continues to ask, “Do you want to talk about it or drink about it?”

“We broke up,” Tony mumbles. “I did it.”

She takes a long breath, and her hand is warm when it slips back into his. “Are you planning on fixing it?”

“Not sure it’s fixable. I said some things, he said some things. Can’t really take any of it back now.”

“People say things they don’t mean all the time. Doesn’t make it unforgivable.”

He shrugs like his heart isn’t broken. “Maybe it’s better off this way.”

Natasha sighs, “Tony.”

“What?”

“Go home.”

“Pretty sure I don’t have one of those anymore.”

“Of course you do,” she says softly. “I promise you that he wants you to come back.”

Tony shakes his head. “You weren’t there, Nat. You don’t know what happened.”

“I don’t have to know what happened to know that he wants you to come home. If he feels even half as terrible as you look, he wants you. Just because you broke up doesn’t mean it’s over. It’s only over if you don’t go back.”

Tony bites his lip to keep it from quivering, and he asks, “What if you’re wrong? What if he doesn’t want to see me?”

“Well, it can’t exactly make things worse, can it?”

He huffs a humorless laugh, “I guess not.”

Natasha slides out of the booth, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Go home before he comes out looking for you, and text me in the morning to tell me I was right.”

She walks away, greeting Steve as he comes in, and Tony lingers there for another minute before getting up. He waves to them both on his way out and tries not to think about what she’ll tell Steve about his reason for being there.

The walk back to his and Bucky’s apartment seems quicker than the walk away from it, and Tony resents it for not giving him more time.

He takes the stairs again and hesitates outside the door, what ifs overwhelming his mind. What if he walks in and all of his things are packed up for him? What if Bucky isn’t even there or all of his belongings are gone instead? What if he can’t fix it and this is where it really ends? He doesn’t know if he could recover from that.

Turning the key in the lock, he opens the door slowly and holds his breath in trepidation.

Nothing looks different. No packed boxes, no smashed picture frames, no sign that anything ever went wrong.

Bucky is on the couch, curled into the corner with his legs held tight to his chest, and he doesn’t seem to notice that he isn’t alone anymore. It’s painfully quiet, and the single light that was on before isn’t enough now that it's grown darker outside, but he hasn’t turned any others on.

“I’m sorry,” Tony says into the silence. It’s as good a place as any to start. “You didn't deserve that. Any of it. The whole stupid thing. You deserve so much better. I should be better at this, but I’ve done a real shit job of it lately, I think. Maybe not even lately. Maybe I’ve been a terrible boyfriend the whole time, and in that case you should probably tell me to go and not come back, but I’d like to think there were at least moments where I was sort of okay, and I’d like to try to be more than just okay if you’ll let me.”

Bucky stares at him, lips parted and red-rimmed eyes unblinking. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Tony freezes, unsure of how to answer that, and Bucky unfolds himself to walk over and stand in front of him.

“You broke up with me,” Bucky says.

“Yes, but I -”

“No,” he interrupts. “You broke up with me.”

Tony frowns in confusion and slowly says again, “Yes.”

“That means I do the grovelling here, because I fucked it up. I beg for the second chance, because I crossed the line so far that you left. And I did it on purpose, too, because I had a shit day so I pushed until you pushed back,” Bucky explains. “And apparently I did such a good job being horrible to you that you think it’s your fault.”

Tony tries to process that, but it’s taking some time to work through. A complete turn around on his thoughts that almost makes him dizzy.

“Why did you have a shit day? What happened?”

“Is that really what you’re focusing on in all of that?” Bucky shakes his head in disbelief and runs a hand through his hair. “God, it’s you that deserves better. That’s what I’m telling you here. You were right to leave, and I should be the one telling you I’m sorry.”

“You had a bad day and took it out on me. How many times have I done the same to you? You never once left.”

“Doesn’t make it right.”

“No,” Tony agrees. He reaches for one of Bucky’s hands, because he needs the contact and has a feeling that Bucky does too. “But it doesn’t mean it’s not worth working on. I meant what I said about wanting to be better for you.”

Bucky nods, looking down at their joined hands. “I want to be better for you, too. How do we do that?”

“A lot of talking about our feelings, probably.”

Bucky pulls a face. “God, that sounds terrible.”

Tony laughs, taking his other hand to pull him in closer, “Yeah, it does, but we’ll get better at it eventually.”

“Can we start tomorrow?” Bucky asks. He leans down to rest his forehead against Tony’s. “I’d really like to just hold you tonight.”

“Yeah, baby,” Tony murmurs. “Hold me tonight. It’ll be better in the morning.”

[burntmcnuggies]

Hawks and S/O Play Among Us

Hawks x Reader

Just a small headcanon I made since me, my mom, my brother, my step-sister, and some of my friends play all the time! If you wanna play together or just chat with me lemme know and I’ll make a private group for you all to join and chat with me! ;)

Warnings: strong language, excess use of profanity, so if you don’t like very strong language please leave! A slight little bit of suggestive sexiness from Hawks, but it’s very very brief! That’s it!

Enjoy!

* Cheats all the time. So make sure you both are in separate rooms. If you’re beside him playing on your phones, he will for sure peek over and see if you’re an imposter or not.

* If you’re both Crewmate he’ll stay glued to your side. He’ll do all tasks with you, make sure he follows you if something got sabotaged, even though this may cause you to lose. “Hawks go to the other one! We only have 15 seconds!” “But what if you die? I’ll be all alone, and everyone will sus me because I stayed with you all the time!” “That’s why you don’t follow me and act sus!” Needless to say it’s difficult getting him to leave your side. If you do die, he’ll start blaming your killer even though he has no proof at all. Then he gets voted out and you do tasks together as ghosts. He’s one of those people to randomly start accusing people, and will use you as an alibi. “I was with my girlfriend and brown was following us. He’s pretty sus.” Then you get spams in the chat saying “wtf.”

* if you’re both imposters, he’ll make sure to sit by you and run around freely by himself knowing you’re safe. Even in a fictional game he makes sure you’re safe... most of the time. “FUCK! FUCK!! BROWN SAW ME!!! WHAT DO I DO?!?!” “LIE!” “THEY ALL WANNA VOTE ME OUT WHAT THE FUCK?!?!” Voting occurs, and you vote him out. “YOU BETRAYED ME?!?!” “WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?!?! IT WOULD BE SUS IF I DIDNT!!!” He’ll start pouring and follow you around in his little ghost form, assisting in sabotage and warning you if there’s anyone around so you can kill people. If you were away from each other, he would venture on his own and sometimes follow you to see if you can double kill. “Yes! Good job, dovie, you make a great sidekick!” If you are being accused, he’ll defend you immediately, which makes it all the more suspicious. Then you both end up getting voted out.

* You’re the imposter and he’s the crewmate. You kill Hawks first. Always. You have to or else he’ll rat you out immediately. He’s very competitive if you are on opposite teams. If you do get voted out he’ll rub it in your face and laugh. “You’re so predictable, dovie. It’s not even funny!” Well, apparently he thinks it’s funny. He also thinks it’s funny seeing the pouty expression on your face. If your teammate kills him, you start laughing at him. “Hah! Yellow got revenge! Thank you yellow! Carry us to victory!” He scowls. “At least I made it farther.” If you successfully kill him, he’ll stalk you through his little ghost and scrutinize your methods. “You killed him in the open, If it were real you’d be locked away by now.” “It’s a game babe. Let me play how I wanna play. You’re acting childish cause I killed you.” “I hope they vote you out. Liar. Murderer. Imposter!” When you end up winning he’ll pout. “I’ll get you next time, baby bird.”

* He’s the imposter and you’re the crewmate. He’s very good at it. He likes to wait and kill you last since he loves to taunt you. Then he’ll lie to the entire chat and act all innocent. However, if you’re playing with friends, this plan always backfires. You don’t even suspect him because he’s so good at playing the role of an imposter, it’s almost scary. If he’s the imposter, he always wins. If he’s acting sus, you call an emergency meeting and immediately convince everyone to vote him out. It’s a desperate last effort tactic to try and win against him. Of course, he smooth talks his way out of things and you’re the one that gets booted. There will be a small little thing at the end where you are playing with friends :)

* Characters, of course yours is whatever you want, but Hawks... he loves to do stupid ass nicknames that you and all your friends and his make fun of. It’s consisted of “Sexy Bird” “No. 2 Bitches” “(Y/N)’s dick giver” “chickenman” “nugget king” “Endeavor my daddy” “Endeavorsimp” “Hawks” The last one is to try and make his fans day if he has any that play when you both just play online together. His character is almost always yellow with little goggles on top, a white suit, and a mini crewmate as his pet. Many don’t believe that it’s actually Hawks, not until he posts pictures on his social media of you and him playing together.

* Playing with Friends: You, Hawks, Endeavor, Mirko, Dabi, Tokoyami, Shoto, Twice, Shigaraki, and Aizawa (you convinced him to play) All of you are on call. Hawks invited Endeavor, Mirko, and Tokoyami. You invited everyone else. (Lets all pretend that you all are normal and there’s no heroes or villains, just all adults with jobs playing kid games. (U/N) is username by the way since you all get to choose ^^

Below is a short story I wrote for this!

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Small Key!

-(U/N) = You (Orange, Pink, Light Green)

-Sexy Bird = Hawks (Yellow)

-Dabeebee = Dabi (Purple)

-Zzzawa = Aizawa (Dark Green)

-QueenRab = Mirko (White)

-MyDadSucks = Shoto (Cyan)

-DarkBoy = Tokoyami (Black)

-Crustball = Shigaraki (Dark Blue)

-2wice = Twice (Brown)

-Endeavor = Endeavor (Red)

------------------------------------

“Hey everyone!” -(U/N)

“Stop being so happy (Y/N).” -Zzzawa

“Hey Doll.” -Dabeebee

“Dabi~! Your user name is your name in my phone!!! How sweet!” -(U/N)

“Hey, I’m right here. Don’t make me come up there and teach you who you belong to again pretty birdie.” -Sexy Bird

“TMI!! I don’t wanna hear about you’re pathetic sex like Keigo. Baby dick.” -QueenRab

“Language Mirko. Please. Who else is joining (Y/N)-“ -Endeavor

“YOU BITCH WE HAVE BOMB ASS SEX!!! TELL HER (Y/N)!!!!” -Sexy Bird

“Can we just start?” -Crustball

“Please.” -Zzzawa

“I agree.” -MyDadSucks

“Shoto change your name.” -Endeavor

“Fuck off old man.” -MyDadSucks

“I am ready to begin this journey of darkness and deceit.” -DarkBoy

“Me too! Oh hell no, I’m not doin’ this.” -2wice

“Guys! Shut up! I’m about to start the game so we all have to go on mute okay?” -(U/N)

“(Y/NNNNN)! You didn’t tell Mirko about our fucking amazing se-“ -Sexy Bird

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You pressed start before your lover could even finish whatever he was saying and rolled your eyes shouting from the guest bedroom. “KEIGO YOU BASTARD IM REALLY GONNA KILL YOU IF YOU SAY ANYTHING ELSE ABOUT OUT SEX LIFE!!!!” He shouted back almost immediately. “SHE CALLED OUR SEX PATHETIC!!!!” You called back. “ITS NOT BABE ITS FUCKING AMAZING NOW SHUT UP AND PLAY!!!!” The little ‘Shhhh’ appeared and it turned out you and Dabi were the imposters. You grinned widely and went towards the right of “The Skeld” map. You ran up towards weapons to pretend to do the task. You took the time to attempt to sabotage the lights like you always did, but it sadly was still loading. Then a purple little astronaut came beside you with little wolf ears. And the name labeled above was red with the word “Dabeebee.”

‘Alright Dabi... lets kick some ass.’ You thought to yourself with a grin as you finally got your kill cool down relinquished. The first thing you sabotaged was lights, and then you began your search for your lover. You went down and turned left, checking to see if anyone was in communications. No one. You then went through lower storage and up Into electrical. You were met with a dark blue color. Poor Shigaraki, your first victim. Keigo could probably wait. Dabi would back you up. You clicked the kill button on your phone and immediately jumped into a vent. You popped out of MedBay and pretended to do the sample task. Then your screen flashed.

------------------------------------

*DISCUSS/ Dabeebee reported a body*

*Crustball has died*

------------------------------------

“Well, there goes the crusty bastard. He sucked anyways.” -Dabeebee

“Where was the body?” -(U/N)

“It’s (Y/N). I know it is.” -Sexy Bird

“What the hell kinda evidence for you have that it was (Y/N)? I’ll kick your ass if you do it again. You weren’t near her you were with Endeavor and I.” -QueenRab

“Those are some pretty bold accusations against me my love.” -(U/N)

“(Y/N) was with me the whole time. The body was in electrical. We were together going down there and she kept going while I went to go do a task.” -Dabeebee

“It was Dabi! No it wasn’t, he’s a good guy! No! He’s evil!” -2wice

“It was Endeavor.” -MyDadSucks

“It’s (Y/N) and Dabi. You guys have to believe me! I know my birdie and she is an imposter right now. Don’t trust her.” -Sexy Bird

“Shut the fuck up.” -QueenRab

“Kei baby you soundin’ kinda sus, quickly blaming me and Dabi.” -(U/N)

“It’s Dabi and I. And no, I didn’t-“ -Endeavor

“WHATEVER ENDEAVOR WE AREN’T IN SCHOOL!!!” -(U/N)

“I’m a school teacher, (Y/N). Don’t forget I tutored you our freshmen year.” -Zzzawa

“That makes me sound old Shōta.” -(U/N)

“Discussion time just ended. What’re we doing?” -MyDadSucks

“I’m still voting (Y/N).” -Sexy Bird

“Oh yes, I love you too Kei’. So much.” -(U/N)

“It was dark. I couldn’t see anything. I didn’t know where I was.” -DarkBoy

“I’m votin’ Keigo cause he’s bein’ a petty little dickless bitch.” QueenRab

“RUDE.” -Sexy Bird

“I’m skipping.” -Dabeebee

“Me too.” -(U/N), DarkBoy, 2wice, Endeavor, and Zzzawa

------------------------------------

7 skips: (Y/N), Dabeebee, DarkBoy, 2wice, Endeavor, and Zzzawa

1 vote for Endeavor: MyDadSucks

1 vote for Sexy Bird: QueenRab

1 vote for (U/N): Sexy Bird

------------------------------------

*NO ONE WAS EJECTED*

------------------------------------

‘That’s good no one believe Keigo. If they did me and Dabi would be- Dabi and I would be dead.’ Next turn you went left, heading down to MedBay to “finish” the samples. While you waited you checked to see if you could sabotage. A couple seconds later the oxygen depletion was activated. ‘Nice Dabi!’ You cracked a smile and left MedBay, running into a red character, Endeavor. Poor Endeavor. You successfully reached lower engine before killing the old player. You quickly passed Mirko and your face paled once you realized she would find the body and report it, seeing you leaving. You only continued in, receiving nothing from the others about a dead body. You weren’t gonna ask questions. Suddenly...

------------------------------------

*DISCUSS/ MyDadSucks reported a body*

*Endeavor and QueenRab have died*

------------------------------------

“Well, it wasn’t my old man.” -MyDadSucks

“ITS (Y/N) AND DABI!!!! VOTE (Y/N) OUT OR WERE GOING TO LOSE!!!!” -Sexy Bird

“I already voted.” -Zzzawa

“That fast? Who’d you vote for?” -(U/N)

“Hawks.” -Zzzawa

“WHAT?!?!” -Sexy Bird

“I agree! No wait! He’s telling the truth! No way! He’s totally an imposter!” -2wice

“You are being very loud and suspicious. You’re also only blaming (Y/N) and Dabi for no reason. You didn’t even ask where the body was. You passed me coming up from reactor. And the body was in lower engine. You were the only one I sa-“ -MyDadSucks

“I WAS WATCHIN’ SECURITY CAMS!!!! CMON MAN!!” -Sexy Bird

“I’m voting Kei’ too.” -(U/N)

“Me too.” -Dabeebee

“I will not eject my mentor. He’s taught me a lot. He’s intelligent. I believe him.” -DarkBoy

“THANK YOU TOKOYAMI!!! SOMEONE HERE APPRECIATES MY SMARTS!!” -Sexy Bird

“What smarts? You’re a total birdbrain.” -(U/N)

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5 votes for Sexy Bird: MyDadSucks, Zzzawa, Dabeebee, 2wice, and (U/N).

2 votes for (U/N): DarkBoy and Sexy Bird

------------------------------------

*Sexy Bird WAS EJECTED*

------------------------------------

(Dead Chat)

“YOU WERE RIGHT KEIGO ITS (Y/N) and DABI!!!! HE KILLED ME WHEN I FOUND ENDEAVORS BODY AFTER SHE KILLED HIM IN LOWER ENGINE!!!” -QueenRab

“I was the first one to die. It’s been boring. I haven’t been doing anything.” -Crustball

“YOU ARENT DOING TASKS?!?!?!” -QueenRab

“They’re already going to win.” -Endeavor

“SHUT UP!!!” -QueenRab

“I KNEW IT!!!!” -Sexy Bird

------------------------------------

You covered your mouth in shock that you actually got everyone to vote out Hawks. Aizawa was annoyed, Shoto was getting suspicious of how loud and pushy he was being to vote you out without any evidence, Dabi was your teammate so of course he’d vote with you, and then Twice just went with everyone else. You ran down first, running to admin with Tokoyami following right behind you. All the sudden your lover burst into the guest bedroom and stomped over towards your bed, spreading his wings and plopping beside you. “I knew it was you and Dabi. But nobody fuckin’ believed me.” You rolled your eyes and pretended to do the key scan while you sabotaged reactor. “Keigo, you were acting wayyyyy too sus. This is why you always lose when we play with friends. You’re too loud. You gotta be calm and persuasive. How on earth did you become an undercover agent for the FBI.”

“Shut the fuck up. I just wanna win that’s all. I also wanna be right, and I was, and now everyone’s comin’ and tellin’ me I’m right.” He smirked smugly and wrapped one of his wings around you, pulling you close to his chest while he watched you play. You went with Tokoyami and when you finally got him alone in navigation you killed him. Your thumb jerked upwards to go to the vent, but as soon as you did a Dark Green astronaut cane into view. Seeing you vent and leave the dead body. “Fuck!” You cursed and banged your head lightly in your head as the screen lit up. Your lover laughed. “Hey~ there’s still a chance we could win.” You sent him a glare. “Dabi will let us win. He’s a pro! C’mon Dabi! Help me out bro!”

------------------------------------

*DISCUSS/ Zzzawa reported a body*

*DarkBoy has died*

------------------------------------

“(Y/N) vented.” -Zzzawa

“What? Aizawa I literally just fucking saw you leave the body—SHES LYING!!!!” -(U/N)

“Is that Hawks?” -MyDadSucks

“OH MY GOD YOU’RE LITERALLY THE WORST GET THE FUCK OUT OR YOU’RE SLEEPING ON THE COUCH!!!! —THIS IS MY HOUSE!!!! AND I NEED THE BED FOR MY WINGS BABY BIRD!!!!” -(U/N)

“Can you guys fuck some other time? Are you sure you saw (Y/N) vent Mr. Caterpillar man. Do you have your contracts in?” -Dabeebee

“I don’t need input from a unemployed burnt looking drug dealer. It was (Y/N).” -Zzzawa

“A bit harsh coming from a raggedy looking old man.” -Dabeebee

“Can I just point out Twice has been awfully quiet? He bein’ pretty sus right now.” -(U/N)

“I’m the imposter! No I’m not! I’m a crewmate believe me!” -2wice

“He’s too stupid to be an imposter. I’ve been with him he was in MedBay.” -Dabeebee

“Yeah I was! But Hawks is already dead and ratted (Y/N) out! So it’s gotta he her!” -2wice

“Voting ends soon. I’m voting (Y/N). My apologies.” -MyDadSucks

“Agreed.” -Zzzawa

“Awe Shoto it’s okay, I love you so much. This is why you aren’t dead yet because you’re a pure angel! -I’m sittin’ right here pretty bird- no you aren’t an angel, you’re a devilish asshole.” -(U/N)

“I love you too, (Y/N).” -MyDadSucks

“Sorry doll, votes are stacked against you. Good game though.” -Dabeebee

“Yeah, fuck you Dabi.” -(U/N)

“Anytime baby, I’m open.” -Dabeebee

------------------------------------

4 votes for (U/N): MyDadSucks, Zzzawa, Dabeebee, and 2wice

1 vote for Zzzawa: (U/N)

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*(U/N) WAS EJECTED*

------------------------------------

(Dead chat)

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the imposter who killed me.” -Crustball

“(Y/N) I TRUSTED YOU!!!!” -QueenRab

“Guys it’s just a game, don’t take it so-“ -(U/N)

“I STILL WANNA BEAT ALL YOU LAME ASS BITCHES!!!! ILL KICK ALL YOU’RE ASSES!!! JUST YOU FUCKING WAIT!!” -QueenRab

“Mirko please calm down. You’re being loud and obnoxious.” -Endeavor

“(Y/N) is right, even though she killed me. I applaud her devotion to the role. She outsmarted us well.” -DarkBoy

“TOKOYAMI!!! YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE!!!! -HAWKS GO GET YOUR OWN PHONE STOP YELLING AND GRABBING MINE!!!” -(U/N)

“HAWKS YOURE NOT DOING YOUR TASKS?!?!” -QueenRab

“HELL NO THATS BORING. I LIKE WATCHING (Y/N) LOSE! -HEY! I KILLED YOU!” -(U/N)

------------------------------------

You muted yourself and stopped listening to the chat of everyone arguing, mainly Mirko to everyone about doing tasks. You wondered around and looked for Dabi, following him around and assisting in Sabotage. Warm hands roamed over your waist, and a soft kiss was placed on your temple, soft red feathers brushing over your shoulders and lightly dusting over your leg. “Someone’s getting cuddly.” You announced quizzically, watching Dabi lure Twice into comms before killing him and running out. Your lovers scruffy chin rested against your shoulder, his head leaning against yours as he watched your screen. “Even though I’m still annoyed that you killed me, I’m proud of you baby bird. It’s difficult for people to out talk me. Especially you.”

“Was that an insult or a compliment?” You asked not really sure how to feel about his comment. He laughed lowly, the rumbled of his chest vibrating your back. “Hmm... let’s say both. Win win, yeah?” He began to kiss up your neck, the soft smacking of his wet lips against your skin echoing in your ears and making you shiver. “Keigo... what are you doing?” He hummed in dismissal of your words, rubbing your sides gently before slipping down to your hip. “What? I can’t love on you? I show my pretty bird some affection~?” Your lips set into a firm line and you gave him a look. “...you’re still sleeping on the couch.” He pouted. “So... no sex?”

------------------------------------

*DISCUSS/Zzzawa reported a body*

*2wice has died*

------------------------------------

“It was in communications.” -Zzzawa

“Dabi was with me the whole time. I met up with him after he finished a task in weapons. We fixed oxygen and met back up in the cafeteria and moved to reactor.” -MyDadSucks

“You’re the only one down there, and imposters can self report. You put yourself in a bit of a bind there. Mr. Caterpillar man. Guess the teacher ain’t that smart.” -Dabeebee

“I agree. My apologies Mr. Aizawa. No offense or hard feelings.” -MyDadSucks

“None taken Shoto. The evidence is stacked against me. Good game Dabi.” -Zzzawa

“Nice knowin’ ya both.” -Dabeebee

“Wait what-“ -MyDadSucks

------------------------------------

*Zzzawa WAS EJECTED*

------------------------------------

Victory flashed in your screen and you fist pumped the air cheering in victory. Hawks frowned beside you, pulling his hands away and tucking his wings between you, cocooning himself away from you to sulk that he had lost in a game he was supposed to be really good at. “Baby come here.” You called out to him, gently stroking his wings. He grunted and moved a wing down to glare. “...we can have sex later?” He moved his wings to wrap around you again and his arms were around you tightly, hot breath fanning slightly over your ear. “Thank you love bird~ and congrats on winnin’ the game. But...” You swallowed thickly. “B-But what...?”

“I’ll be winnin’ in the bedroom.”

------------------------------------

“Did you forget we weren’t on mute anymore? Horny idiots.” -Zzzawa

“Hawks!” -Endeavor

“(Y/N) IM COMING TO BEAT HIS ASS!!! DONT LET HIM TOUCH YOU!!!” QueenRab

“I think I should get reward for winning, doll. Wanna come to my place? Forget about that birdbrained idiot. Cum for me~” -Dabeebee

“DABI THE FUCK?! Stop being sexual. It’s disgusting.” -Crustball

“I don’t understand why you’re all like this. Was there a class I missed about being weird?” -MyDadSucks

“No. They’re just weird.” -DarkBoy

“Wait we lost.” -2wice 

------------------------------------

END.

[rivetwrites]

//hello!! it's here!! it's my first fic, so it's not at my full potential yet! i had a lot of trouble with toko and syo. i tried my best to...at least remove the sneezing thing, but i know it's not perfect and i'm hoping to improve in the future! the ending is sort of rushed, as i was milking the last of motivation and ideas!! definitely not proof-read BAHHAHA

Byakuya Togami's Trial

Chihiro was dead. It was almost surreal, everyone promised not to kill anyone else. Yet it was in such a gruesome way. He was found in the girl’s locker room, which is strange, since he discovered to be a boy. Surely Monokuma knew about it, he knew practically everything about them.

Everyone was seated in their respectful places in the trial room. Kiyotaka looked the most nervous, but everyone looked the same. Who wouldn’t be? Chihiro was found strung up by his wrists and neck, “bloodlust” written in his own blood on the wall. And someone took the time to do that. Who would even want to hurt Chihiro? Sure, he’s an easy target, he wouldn’t have fought back, but he was the nicest one here.

“Let’s go over the rules once mo-” Monokuma had started, the bear sitting in his “judge seat.” But he was quickly interrupted by Byakuya, “Shut it. We’re starting.” That wasn’t unlike him, but he had a small smile on his face, almost like he was excited to start the trial. Who the hell would be excited to discuss one of our dead friend’s death? And convict someone and send them to their own death. “Very well! Since Togami thinks that he’s the judge, we shall start!!”

Of course the discussion went to how Chihiro even got to the girl’s locker room. Monokuma had stated that he did know that he was a boy, so it would’ve been impossible for him to get into the room on his own. “Obviously he was dead before he even went into the girl’s locker room,” Byakuya started, “then strung him up onto the wall. Doesn’t the position of his body look familiar, Makoto?” He looked over at the small boy, who perked up at his name.

Yes, it did look familiar. Makoto had seen similar positioning in the book that Byakuya showed him in the library. The cases with Genocide Jack. But Genocide Jack wasn’t here. He couldn’t be. As soon as Makoto mentioned his name, Byakuya looked over at Toko, who seemed to have almost burst a blood vessel.

“Genocide Jack is a lot closer than we think, Makoto,” he hummed, his hand resting on his chin. Toko looked like she wanted to jump over her table to kick his ass, but she was starting to panic. “Y-you promised n-not to tell anyone, B-Byakuya!” It had only hardened the case that Toko was Genocide Jack. On cue, from the sudden conviction and stress that she had been forced to endure, her eyes rolled back as she fell onto the floor.

Makoto had jolted up to help her up, which Togami gripped his arm tightly. Toko had started to stand back up, but she looked so different. This wasn’t Toko, it couldn’t be. She had flashes of both anger and slight arousal as she started laughing hysterically. Her voice radiated throughout the trial room, high pitched and unnerving. Her laughter soon died down to small chuckles and giggles, her wild eyes looking at Makoto. Well, it looked like she was looking at him, but her eyes seem to not have acknowledged him. “You caaaallled? Master has called me! Ooooh!! I’m guessing it was about me, huh huh huh?” Her voice sounded completely different compared to Toko’s quiet, stuttering voice.

Once Byakuya started explaining how he found out about Genocide Jack, she seemed confused. “That’s what they call me? I’m not some guy! Genocide Jill, or Syo would do for me!!” Her sentence followed with her cackling laughter. Tok- Syo, was definitely confused when everyone started to convict her of being the murderer. “Whaaat? No way! Makoto! You should see a pattern of my kills!” Of course she went to Makoto. But she was right. She only killed boys. But once Byakuya stated that Chihiro was yes, indeed a boy, she almost looked disappointed. “Awhh!! Now I wish I killed him! But I didn’t! I don’t use those weapons! Plus, an electrical cord?” Again, she was right. All the pictures consisted of the boys being pinned up by scissors.

Makoto was about to state that she didn’t have any, but it was shot down when she already had two scissors in her hands. Well, now the suspicion went to Byakuya. He was the only one to know of Genocide Jack, besides Makoto, who had an alibi. Togami looked like he was about to snap, but clicked his tongue. “Obviously I couldn’t have done it. I saw Mondo leaving the girl’s locker room,” that sentence brought Mondo’s attention. “You fucking strung Chihiro up?!” Thankfully Sakura was within arms reach of Mondo, because he was about to fucking kill Byakuya.

“I simply wanted to make things interesting. You wouldn’t want a boring trial, now would you?” He still had a cool smile on his face, but his back was tensing from the sudden threat of Mondo actually getting to him. “Why the fuck would you do that?!” Owada’s voice started getting furious and loud. Kyoko put one of her gloved hands up, her eyes glaring at Byakuya with clear disgust before saying that we should continue the trial before times up.

Now everyone looked over at Mondo, who looked extremely guilty. Before people even began to shoot questions at him, Kiyotaka’s voice triumphed over theirs. “N-no way! Mondo would never! We’re bros, he’s not that kind of person!! What kind of people are you?!” Mondo looked just as astonished at Taka defending him, especially in such an aggressive manner. It was very unlike him. Mondo wanted to confess so badly, but something inside him, anxiety and fear prevented him from doing so. But all the evidence started pointing to him. Celeste said she saw Chihiro late at night with a workout bag, how Mondo said the correct colour of the tracksuit, how he was strong enough to swing that weight at him. It was all clicking into place, and now looking horrible for Mondo.

But it didn’t make sense. Would Chihiro be able to die from one swing? There was only one head wound, quite a bit of blood, but would he be able to die? Or simply be knocked out. Mondo wasn’t the...brightest of the bunch, so would be able to know that he didn’t actually kill him? Kyoko had the same thought, her eyes scanning Mondo’s face as she spoke up, “Were you sure that Chihiro was dead?” Straight to the point. Owada looked confused, his brows furrowing, “...Yeah. I carried him to the girl’s locker room. He wasn’t breathing.” Which is understandable, but if you get knocked out, especially by such a big guy like Mondo, your body can seem dead.

“Obviously he was dead. I checked beforehand.” Byakuya tapped his glasses, his voice speaking matter of factly, but it still didn’t make sense. “Togami, your breathing stops and your pulse goes faint when someone knocks you out,” Makoto piped up. He wasn’t trying to accuse him, but he was looking at every option. Their lives are on the line. “What’re you saying, Makoto? That I killed him? I’m telling you, he was already dead!” His voice started to falter, like he was starting to believe it himself. He didn’t properly check Chihiro before he hung him up, but he didn’t want to admit it.

Byakuya turned to Monokuma, “Bear! Tell them that I didn’t kill him! There’s no way!” The smile that he held had fallen as soon as he was being suspected. Monokuma didn’t respond, only a soft “puhuhu” coming from him. Sweat started to bead on Togami’s forehead, looking back at the students, “There’s no way. I didn’t!” No one was defending him, well, except Syo, but even then, she wasn’t taking it seriously. “When I was checking his body,” Sakura finally said, crossing her arms across her chest, “his lips and fingertips were blue. Which I’m pretty sure wouldn’t happen if he was already dead.” In which, Kyoko confirmed that it’s true.

Now everyone’s eyes were on Byakuya, who looked disheveled and anxious. He looked like he was at his breaking point, the reality hitting him that he, Byakuya Togami, had killed Chihiro by accident. He didn’t mean to in the slightest, but the chance that he did was eating him up.

Though, the one who looked the least anxious and sad now, was Taka. The weight of grief was lifted off of his chest, that maybe, just maybe, his bro was safe!! Mondo, not so much. He felt a weight of guilt on his own shoulders. He caused Chihiro’s death. It’s his fault. All his fault. He never felt worse. The boy trusted him, and he just- Mondo was thrown out of his thoughts at Monokuma’s voice. “All right!! Time to cast your votes! I will change this a bit!! Whoever has the most votes between Togami and Owada, will be chosen! Now it’s just luck! Puhuhuhu!!”

There wasn’t enough time to actually get a confession. But even they don’t know. Guess it was just luck. The voting time was a lot longer, which they couldn’t choose to be thankful over, or to be fucking terrified. Finally, the votes were in.

Byakuya had the most votes.

The look of horror on Togami’s face was...almost priceless. When Monokuma pulled the slot game to reveal his sprite, they were correct. Byakuya did kill Chihiro. It felt like fiction. Actually, this entire fucking game felt like fiction to them, but it was all real. All the deaths were real. Sayaka, Junko, Leon, and Chihiro were all gone, and Byakuya was next. The tall boy didn’t even want to believe it, his jaw opening and closing as he tried to think of a rebuttal. But it was already decided. Byakuya killed Chihiro, it was over.

They all left their stands, off the court to discuss, but Byakuya was near unresponsive. It was...strange. He always had something sarcastic to say, just like he said to Leon before his execution. It was...quiet. Probably out of shock, no one expected Byakuya to kill someone. Byakuya being a victim, yes, but not him being a murderer. Mondo seemed to have calmed down, well, as much as he could during the situation. Sakura still had to hold him back by the arm so he didn’t commit his own murder right in that trial room.

“Puhuhuu! What a twist!! I do love surprises, isn’t that right Togami?” Monokuma looked down at the man from his seat, “I mean, you do love surprises!” The words were almost taunting Byakuya, beads of sweat trailing down the side of his face. He looked...defeated. Togami didn’t even care that he was going to die, just to be found out, just to be wrong, really hit him like a truck.

No one wanted to say anything, the only words to be heard was Mondo’s hisses of rage and Taka’s reassuring words to his bro. Makoto was the first to say something, “Chihiro would be alive if you didn’t do that stunt, Byakuya.” It caused the taller man to snap his neck to look at Naegi, his gaze being a split of sorrow and...almost anger. Before Byakuya could even respond, Kyoko piped up, “it was stupid of you. I didn’t expect something that disgusting to come from you.” It was harsh, probably the harshest that Kirigiri has been up to that point, but no one could really blame her.

Byakuya felt like he should...apologize, but pride inside of him refrained it. They weren’t good enough to hear an apology, so he stayed silent. It only displeased everyone, Sakura now having to hold back Aoi from smacking him as well. Since the conversation was going nowhere, Monokuma decided to end it himself, “Huh! I thought we were going to get, ‘oooo, I’m so sorry! Forgive me, don’t do this! I need to be there for the Togami’s!” His words were mocking, draping the side of his body over the arm of his chair dramatically before laughing, “buuuut, I wouldn’t expect anything less from you! P-p-p-punishment time!!”

It was almost ceremonial to see Byakuya being dragged off with little to no resistance. He didn’t want to look like a fool, especially the last time they ever get to see him. Kiyotaka would usually look away, hating seeing the death of people who, in his opinion, ultimately didn’t deserve it. But he was the one in the front, watching everything unfold. Mondo tried to get him away, not really wanting Taka to get sad again, but he refused, pulling away from his bro’s touches.

Instead of watching it first hand, they looked up on the big screen. It flickered on, the colours warping to what...seemed to be Byakuya. He was wearing very beat up clothing, filthy with dirt. He was looking down at his attire, a look of pure disgust on his face. He was...a “commoner.” Monokuma popped into the scene, wearing an elementary student uniform. He had a huge pile of rocks, ranging from small pebbles, to near huge stones that he could barely hold. The name of the execution finally appeared on the screen:

Human Disqualification

The music playing in the background was almost somber. Until Monokuma started pelting the stones at Byakuya. Look of pain of agony appeared on Togami’s face as he was forced to endure the hard rocks hitting his skin. Welts and bruises started to appear as time went on.

Stoning someone to death took ages, especially from only one person doing it. But everyone sat in watch. Not like they had other things to do, they weren’t allowed to leave. But people were allowed in. Everyone was so distracted, Aoi cringing every time the stones hit a more sensitive place on Togami. No one spoke a word, but they didn’t have anything to say anyway.

Until they heard the courtroom door open.

It was so sudden, even causing Sakura to jolt slightly from the sudden change of noise. Everyone’s head whipped around to see what has caused it. Definitely not one of them, since they were too entranced by Byakuya’s execution, which was still happening slowly. Small footsteps seemed to have been getting closer, and they were very uneven and tended to scrape on the floor ever so often.

...Chihiro?

The small boy looked rather...sullen. His blood was stained on his clothes and the right side of his face, his neck and wrists bruised from the blood rushing to them. It was...strange. Why was he here? Was this some kind of sick trick that Monokuma was playing? That thought was immediately debunked as Chihiro spoke,

“D-did I...miss something?”

He seemed so confused and...understandably upset. He had woken up in a small pool of his own blood, his neck and wrists sore from the constant pressure of the electrical cord on them, no one around the entire school. He had assumed there was another murder and that he just wasn’t told, so he went there himself.

But everyone was staring at him. It was starting to make him nervous, having so many eyes on him, Byakuya’s execution in the background. Huh, Chihiro didn’t expect him to be able to kill someone. Kyoko was the first to speak up, of course, but even she had a look of shock on her face, “You’re...supposed to be dead. Byakuya killed you,” her voice was still as calm as ever. It was sort of hard to hear her over Yasuhiro’s shrieks of terror at the boy’s “ghost.”

A look of terror appeared on Chihiro, tears filling his big eyes as he looked up at the huge screen, “B-but, I’m not! I-I promise!” It was obvious that he wasn’t dead, but it was mostly to soothe Hiro. But if Chihiro is alive, then Byakuya has no reason to die. Makoto was able to shout loud enough, “M-Monokuma! Chihiro is alive!!” It caused the Monokuma on the screen to turn to the camera, an obvious look of confusion on his face. The robot paused for a moment, not responding, almost like he was...checking that what they were saying was true. He quickly returned, a loud sigh of...annoyance emitting from him as he was forced to stop the execution.

After all, he wasn’t allowed to break his own rules.

Byakuya was quickly let back into the trial room, bruises and cuts all over his body as he was still wearing the “commoner” clothes. He fell to his knees in front of a very confused Chihiro, which caused the small boy to back up a few steps. Togami reached for the boy’s tiny hand, pressing small kisses to his fingers as he apologized. His voice sounded broken and saddened. His ego was just crushed to death. He didn’t even care who was looking, nor how he even looked like in that moment.

Chihiro looked visibly uncomfortable, trying to tell him that it was okay - though it kind of wasn’t - and that he shouldn’t apologize like that. It took Sakura and Aoi to drag Byakuya away by the shoulders, forcing him to let go of the boy’s hand. He didn’t speak to anyone else, still spewing apologies at Fujisaki. It was almost laughable. Surely, Mondo would’ve been laughing straight at his face at it, but the total shock to see Chihiro alive really hit him. He had pulled the small boy close to his chest, his own apologies leaving his lips. The boy welcomed this one a bit more, his cheek resting on his shoulder. Though, Mondo felt like he shouldn’t be forgiven. He had almost killed the boy.

But it was okay for now, they were alive, and somehow Byakuya was able to survive another day. Mondo promised not to beat him alive...yet, as long as Chihiro and Kiyotaka was alive, he was going to be okay.

[softsillytwsted]

Among Us with the First Years

Yall guess who’s late to the party! I played a long session with my friends and it jump-started my writing.

Warnings: mentions of blood and violence.

General

First of all, the number one rule of this game is to keep quiet and stay anonymous until the next meeting, but no one follows this. For one thing, y’all are sitting in a circle while playing this so it’s hard not to talk

Ace also finds it extremely funny to mess with Deuce and Sebek

Then there’s Grim who can’t play and is instead back-seat playing on your lap. He is also honest to a fault so it’s obvious when you two are the imposter

Ace, Deuce and Epel are always down to play, but it takes Jack and Sebek some goading for them to join. Luckily Jack never backs down from a competition and Lilia encourages Sebek to ‘enjoy his youth’

You all usually play a quick game during lunch time or do sleepovers at Ramshackle and play all night long

ANGRY RANTS IN THE GHOST CHATS

The emergency button was pushed. “Speed run on Ace let’s go!”

Ace

Ace uses the red character with the cherry hat

He’s the best at this game hands down

This smooth talker is good at persuading people, especially Deuce, to his side

He can also start a harmless conversation while murdering someone in cold blood like a psychopath

Maybe because he loves playing tricks on people that he’s able to use sabotages to his full advantage

Although Ace is the best at the game, because he’s a little shit he’s on everyone’s hit list and will die if he’s not careful

Surprisingly enough, Deuce isn’t Ace’s favorite person to kill. It’s Sebek. Sebek’s reactions just make everything funnier.

Ace looked at the task bar. “It’s been silent for awhile now. Who’s not done with their tasks yet?”

“I’ve finished,” replied Epel, the pouting ghost.

“Same,” you chirped while Grim huffed in your lap.

“I finished too,” Jack, the ghost, responded as he hovered disapprovingly at the imposter in-game.

“I-I still got a few left...” Deuce muttered.

“I have a few left as well,” Sebek declared. You/Grim, Deuce, Sebek and Ace are the only ones alive. 

“Well, I’m done,” Ace sighed. “Can you two hurry up? It’s getting kinda boring waiting around like this.”

Oxygen tanks have been sabotaged.

“Funny how this happens right after you said that!” Grim accused Ace. “Y/n! Get the top one, the top one! We’re not gonna lose this game!”

“Alright already! Deuce stop panicking and finish up your tasks. Ace or Sebek should do-”

The moment you reached your destination, you watched helplessly as Ace’s cherry red character slashed your character in pieces. Grim hissed in annoyance as you silently stared up at Ace. He winked at you.

“-the bottom one...”

Deuce

Deuce uses the dark blue character with the egg

Ace is the first person he goes after when he’s the imposter

Unironically likes to do the tasks and is the fastest at doing them

He also can’t multi-task. Focusing on his tasks while watching out for corpses and the imposter is impossible for him

Will literally run past a corpse 5 times before finally noticing it

This boy isn’t good under pressure especially when everyone is yelling at him. If the oxygen tanks or reactor is sabotaged, Deuce will bang on every wall before reaching it 

Also can’t come up with a good alibi when accused

Epel pushed the emergency button.

“I believe Deuce is the imposter... when I was passing by I saw him standing still in the hallway and when I came back he was still there.”

“W-what? No no no I wasn’t! I was moving around! I’m not the imposter!” 

“That sounds exactly like what an imposter would say!” Sebek barked.

“Yep, I definitely think Deuce is the imposter,” Ace chuckled. Ace doesn’t really care if Deuce was the imposter or not. The frustrated look on Deuce’s face as he tries to think of a way to clear his name fueled the ginger’s amusement. 

“I don’t know, maybe he was just taking his time looking at his map like the last few games?” You tried to defend Deuce, but only Jack agreed with you.

“Nah let’s kill him.” Ace

“Ya.” Epel

“Ditto.” Grim

“Agreed.” Sebek

“...” Jack

And so Deuce was ejected into space where it was revealed that he in fact was not the imposter. He pouted at his phone, still trying to figure out where to go next. “I told you I’m innocent.”

“Cheer up Deuce! Next time should be better,” you giggled at him. Deuce perked up at your laughter and beamed at you.

“Thanks for believing in me back there. I can count on you next time right?”

“...Deuce did you forget the imposter is chosen at random?”

The imposter was later revealed to be Epel.

Jack

Chose the white character with the ski goggles

The second worst player in the game

Is the person who always enforces others not to group together, but when he sees two people in a room he will hover over the door to make sure one of them won’t kill the other

The boy has a hard time lying and faking doing tasks and everyone exploits this

The quickest games are when he’s the imposter and sometimes it’s over before he can even kill someone

When Jack is innocent: “Jack are you the imposter?” “No”

When Jack isn’t: “Jack are you the imposter?” Ears flat, tail lifeless “...”

This game gives him the worst existential crisis because a part of him wants to play with all his might but the other JUST. CAN’T. LIE.

You found Sebek’s cold body lying in the admin room. All hell breaks loose once you report the body.

“FINALLY SOMEONE FOUND MY BODY! I was getting frustrated when SOMEBODY keeps passing me,” Sebek shouts while looking pointedly at Deuce.

Deuce shamefully looks away.

“Alright let’s start with the usual questions,” you began and turned to Jack. “Jack are you the imposter?”

“...No.”

“Okay Jack’s out-”

“Hold it! We shouldn’t rule out Jack just because he said so!” Ace interrupted you with a scowl on his lips. Jack snarled at the accusation. 

“Are you calling me a liar?” he growled out. Unperturbed at the 192cm wall of muscle who was bristling at him, Ace’s face twisted into a mocking smirk.

Well I ain’t calling you a truther. “That’s the whole point of the game! For all we know, you could’ve finally wizened up and are lying to us now!”

“...Ace has a point,” Deuce held his chin in thoughtful agreement. On the other hand, you and Epel were conflicted. 

“I’d say we vote Ace out,” Grim said with a sly grin on his face. “I saw his character look at us funny.” The little monster still held a grudge against Ace for saying Grim sucked at the game. (”But it’s true! You’re paws can’t even hit the buttons!” “Shut up Ace!”)

“That is suspicious,” simple, easily swayed Deuce agreed. 

“Wait wait wait! How the fuck does that make sense?” Ace retorted. At the same time, Grim began smashing his paws at the screen and managed to vote for Ace. (“Hah! Take that Ace!”)

Deuce cast his vote immediately after, and Jack followed up while sending an amused smirk towards Ace. Epel was red in the face from trying to hold in his laughter from the silliness of it all. Eventually, he managed to vote for Ace.

Ace was ejected into space. Crew mates win.

“Lucky guess,” Ace grumbled under his breath.

Epel

Epel chooses the purple character and uses the straw hat

Has the most wins under his belt and is that one player that never gets killed 

Epel usually plays it safe until someone riles him up and now he’s killing like he’s got something to prove

The master of vent assassinations.

Seriously. Usually when the first body gets reported, it’s been discovered that two other people have been killed already.

Tends to go on cams more than do the tasks

You, Ace and Jack were doing tasks in the electrical room. The lights go off and Epel’s purple character jumps out of a vent to stab you with its tongue. When the lights come back on, Epel is gone. Jack discovers your dead body and reports it immediately.

“It was Ace. I was in the same room with him and Y/n when the lights were off. Then he killed Y/n.”

“Hah? No way why would I do something that obvious?”

“So you admit you’re the imposter?”

Everyone votes Ace out. You discreetly squint at Epel for being so devious, but the lavender-haired boy only smiles sweetly at you in return. You were Epel’s first kill in this round, so after you finished your tasks you spent the rest of the game following him around. 

You quickly realized that nothing was more frightening than Epel, a 156cm ball of fury.

You watched him hide in the medical room’s vent while Jack was being scanned. The minute Deuce, who stuck around to see Jack start the scan, left the room Epel jumped out and murdered Jack in cold blood. You saw Jack flinch as his character died, but he resumed his tasks without a grumble.

With only two people left alive, Epel stalked the halls to look for his last kill. He found both Sebek and Deuce in the cafeteria. One is at the vending machine, and the other is at the garbage disposal. Deuce finished first and spied Epel heading towards Sebek. “Oh Epel, did you finish your ta-” he watched as Epel’s character slashed into Sebek. The game ends soon after.

Thanks to Epel, the kill cool down was extended... again.

Sebek

Chose the lime green character with the horns (”THEY’LL NEVER BE AS MAJESTIC AS WAKA-SAMA’S”)

Living in the Valley of Thorns has him unfamiliar with technology in general so he’s extremely clumsy with the controls.

He also has a hard time navigating the area and is always hitting the walls and missing the doors

Also the slowest at doing tasks 

Speaking of tasks, there was one game where he thought he finished all of them and he ended up giving the imposter enough time to kill everyone (”If the tasks are not all green that means you didn’t finish them!” “WHAT!?”)

Sebek is very mission-oriented and although he considers it beneath him to lie, he will to fulfill his objective

Will go the long way around to try and avoid his shifty friends

Absolutely fun to tease but not the worst at the game to be fair

“Wait so who did you see kill Jack, Deuce? Sebek or Hot Sebek?” you asked the teal-eyed teen. 

“For the last time STOP USING MY NAME!”

“Quiet normal Sebek,” you shushed him. “Let Deuce talk.”

“It was the hot one... H-hot Sebek.” Poor Deuce tried so hard to contain his laughter as he spoke. Ace was already rolling on the floor and Epel was stifling a chuckle with his hand.

Sebek was fuming but stayed quiet while everyone else voted. Soon Hot Sebek AKA Ace gets ejected into space and the crew members win.

“We’re starting a new session and this time no one else will use my name. GOT IT?”

“Sounds good,” Jack said as he glowered at Ace. “I don’t understand why you would want to hide your identity. We should all face each other with everything bared - fair and square!”

“That is exactly right, Jack! Cowardly tactics should be frowned upon!”

Ace deadpanned, “Did you guys forget that’s the whole point of the game?”

[fork-tectors]

trusted ⁽ᵖᵃʳᵗ ²⁾

; among us au trusted ; unordinary / among us reader insert [ unedited ] [ word count ║ 1108 words ] [ part one ║ part two ]

One (1) impostor remains.  

What the absolute hell? No one informed us that there were gonna be two of them. They never at least hinted at it. I thought once we ejected the one, then the nightmare would be over, we'll be back to our separate daily lives. But, surprise, surprise, there were two.  

I huffed. This sucks. Finding the first impostor took four days, we don't know how long the next one would take to be discovered. Maybe less? One can only hope so. If it lasts for more than a week, chances are that everyone gets murdered.  

I squeezed my eyes shut, rolling over to my side to pretend to sleep.  

The transition from evening to the early morning was horrendously long, let's just say that I didn't get the amount of sleep I need to be energized enough. I didn't want to get up from the bed. I covered myself of the blandly coloured blanket, going back to complete my rest. It's so cosy...  

I was distracted by the loud knock on my door, I groaned in annoyance.

Enduring the relentless knocking, I finally left my bed. Both of my feet came into contact with the cold metal floor, sending a chill throughout my whole body. I brushed off the feeling and walked over to answer whoever was here.

  Not bothering to get ready before answering the door, I open it. The teal haired girl was shyly standing in my doorway, already suited up in her cyan spacewear whilst I was still dressed in the white shirt and shorts they supplied for all of us. It's a uniform, I guess. It's weird, yes.

"Oh! Uh, (Y/n-), I mean, White!" She quickly corrects herself, not that mind her addressing me by my real name. If I was talking one-on-one with another crewmate, I'd feel comfortable if we'd address each other as our name. We all agreed to identify ourselves as our colours. It's easier.

  "It's fine, you can call me (Y/n) if you're more comfortable."  

"Oh, thanks. But I think it'll be better if I call you by your colour." Elaine or Cyan replies, "By the way, um, you should dress up. They're waiting for you in the cafeteria."  

"Fuck, I'm sorry. I'll be quick, I promise!" I head back into my room, hearing her tell me that she'd wait for me, then I heard a click of a door. I grabbed a towel from the clothes shelf and ran into the bathroom.

I finished doing my thing, not wanting to waste more time. I made sure I decently dried myself with towels before I got suited up, so it wouldn't feel uncomfortably moist in it.  

Once I finished, I caught up with Elaine, so she didn't have to wait long for me. The cafeteria came into view, and we decided to spit. Everyone was keeping to themselves, except for the trio. Blyke, Isen and Remi.    

I quickly acquired the tray with the space food, which wasn't exactly appealing, but if I was to get through the day; I might as well feed myself enough. Unwillingly, I trudged myself into an already occupied table, each table was.  

Dark Blue was sat in this one, he was mindlessly pushing the thing around his tray with his utensil; looking like he had no plan on eating the remains. "Um, do you mind if I sit here?" He dropped his fork as a reaction.  

I awkwardly chuckled at him. "Nah, it's cool. I don't mind at all."  

I set myself beside him, but not too close and ate my food. We made small talk here and there, but nothing of importance. He seemed pretty nice, It'll be a shame if he would be the impostor.  

The day went as is. Completing tasks, suspecting impostors, voting to skip due to having not enough shreds of evidence and leaving to our rooms for rest. It seems like the impostor was preparing for something, something big maybe. I was growing more anxious by the minute.  

Those days of us waiting led to this moment.   

"It's orange, I tell you! He was the one who murdered Cyan! Not me! I was there!" Holden pleaded with desperation in his tone. He's close getting ejected as the time of votation counts down, the number of votes pinned on him was high. It was around maybe four or five.  

"Don't fucking lie to my face!" Blyke sneered, "You were alone in navigation with the body. No one else was in there! You're not taking me for a fool, are you?!"  

"Orange vented out of Navi! Fucking listen to me! Why do you always take his side?!" Holden gritted his teeth, looking aggravated.  

The duration of choosing came to an end. Green was loosening the ejection chute, but not opening it yet, preparing to throw Dark Blue out.  

The photos of each crewmate along with the votes they received were displayed on the screen. There only two people who were competing for the ward of ejection. Four voted for Dark Blue, who were Purple, Pink, Green, and Red. Dark Blue and Yellow we're the only ones who went to Orange. I didn't get to vote, the time ran out before I get wrap my head on who to choose.  

Not that anything I did would change the result.  

Remi must've noticed the ratio and turned to the quiet male, "Yellow, why'd you vote Orange...?" She asked in a not-so-obvious accusatory voice.  

Arlo didn't reply, just brushed her question off. My ears hurt as I heard the loud pleas for him to stay on board. "I didn't do anything wrong! I'm innocent!"  

His words were left unheard while he was harshly shoved into the chute, no regards for his comfort. The guy was gonna die, maybe not make it too painful.  

"I hope you're happy now," was his last sentence to us as he was pushed off the ship and pulled into a breathtaking hug by the dark blanket of space. I watch his body go limp through the thick glass. There was no point in fighting it since he was bound to run out of oxygen in no time.  

He’s gonna die.  

Our faces were washed over with guilt as the bold text appeared letter-by-letter on the large screen followed by the italicized words. It was mocking us of our mistake.  

Holden/Dark Blue was not an impostor. One (1) impostor remains.

Idk where will this go tbh. Consume my creation. Tumblr just hates it when I indent my writing. The formatting sucks ass :)))

[diazpoems]

Me watching Riverdale S2:

THE WAY KEVIN IS RAISING HIS HAND TO THE MOTHERFUCKING SKY WHEN HIRAM ASKS FOR A VOLUNTEER FOR A WRESTLING DEMONSTRATION. THIS THIRSTY MOTHERFUCKER. HIS FACE IS PRICELESS.

I wish I could just jump into Riverdale and shake the characters and be like

Cheryl: Your parents fucking suck

Josie: Your parents fucking suck

Veronica: Your parents fucking suck

Betty: Your parents fucking suck

Archie: Your dads okay so far, I don’t know about your mom

Jughead: Your dad used to fucking suck but as a person, at his core, I don’t think he’s evil, and he’s getting better, but he’s got a ways to learn. I don’t know about your mom

Kevin: Your dad’s decent so far? Don’t know about your mom

Like especially Josie because I know it’s hard and that a lot of the trauma her mom felt probably manifested itself badly and Josie probably feels attached to her mom and like she owes her being a good daughter because her mom’s had it bad but like I also DON’T CARE. FUCKING TREAT YOUR CHILD RIGHT. I DON’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT HAPPENED. THATS YOUR CHILD. WOMAN UP AND BE A FUCKING DECENT PERSON. I DON’T CARE THAT YOU PUT A ROOF OVER HER HEAD, FOOD IN HER MOUTH, GAVE HER A SINGING CAREER (But continue to control it and not give her leeway to think and act on her own). SHE DON’T OWE YOU SHIT. FUCK OFF WITH YOUR WEIRD LIFE-FUCKING-SUCKED-FOR-ME-BUT-IM-ALSO-A-CLASSIST-BITCH PARADOX. MY DAD’S GOT IT MADE RIGHT NOW BUT HE HASN’T FORGOTTEN HIS ROOTS, HASN’T FORGOTTEN THE DISCRIMINATION HE FACED AND THE FACT THAT HE GREW UP SHIT POOR EARLY ON AND HE HASN’T DECIDED “Hey, let’s ridicule people for being in a similar position that I was in!”

Basically, this is me begging for for Josie’s mom to ✨fucking do better✨

Anyways yeah normalize Riverdale characters disowning their own parents ✌🏽🥰

Hmmm. If I wasn’t completely and utterly for the Serpents before, the white serpents learning to shut the fuck up and stand with Toni and her grandfather in opposition of the genocide and colonialism that was perpetrated by Cheryl’s great great grandfather? Hell fucking yeah

Dude I’m sorta crying at the scene with Hiram seeing Veronica in her confirmation dress because he’s a piece of shit but this is how it goes down, like it’s a whole thing

I love that I immediately knew the meaning of “Catholic chic”. Apparently that’s all going to church every Sunday for the formative years of my life accomplished

I hope Penelope Blossom dies in a fire :)

OH MY GOD, LOVE SIMON CAME OUT RIGHT AROUND HERE, KEVIN IS ASKING MOOSE TO IT, MY COMFORT MOVIE OH MY GOD-

Ugh, I don’t trust Midge. Something about the tropey-ness of her being The Girlfriend™️ and her face, as well as the fact that she played Gen in tatbilb, something doesn’t sit right. The haircut feels too manic pixie, like she’s hiding something. Bad vibes

NOOO CHERYL ILL GO ON A VACATION WITH YOU 😭 GOD IM SO GONE FOR HER

Aaaaand she did some fuck shit. Aaaand Toni is pretty. Aaaand there’s the internalized homophobia.

Jughead saying that growing up Betty’s and Archie’s windows being parallel always bothered him sounds more like a jarchie admission than a bughead one, I’m just sayin’

BETTY AND JUGHEAD’S REACTIONS WHEN THEY HEAR THE BED SQUEAKING IS ME. Like the little amused but lowkey confused and baffled expression on his face as he’s like “is that their solution to everything? Can’t they ever just talk?” Like no apparently not. Me too Jug, me too-

Idk Vee, maybe he’s asking questions about your father’s line of work and the business of his associates because your dad and mom are fucking evil

What the fuck Veronica. I mean yay because that just gets us closer to Jarchie kiss but like what the fuck Vee. Also Jughead is super cute, like why does the blue eyes black hair thing absolutely melt my weak heart, like I didn’t choose to fall for this pasty ass white boy but here we are. Also Veronica’s eyes are really big and dark and pretty like girl help im falling for these two-

BETTY LITERALLY POINTED IT OUT, C’MON NOW CW, I KNOW WE’VE MADE THE MISTAKE OF GROVELING WITH SPN BUT PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU WE NEED A JARCHIE KISS-

CAN HETEROSEXUALS PLEASE STOP FUCKING ALL THE TIME ON TV. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO SHOVE YOUR STRAIGHTNESS IN MY FACE. NOT EVERYONE IS STRAIGHT YOU KNOW.

“Entertain Jughead” 😏

DUDE. They were sitting ALONE. TOGETHER. In the WOODS. With them being the ONLY ones who haven’t kissed. DUDE.

C’MON MAN, THEY’RE STARING FUCKING LONGINGLY AT EACH OTHER

If there are weird gay ships for straights then Jeronica is the weird straight ship for gays

Ok so is there a legitimate reason why Veronica is faithful to her parents and defends them to a tee and partakes in their mob shit or is she just daddy’s little fucking girl. Like it isn’t her fault that she’s been manipulated but it pisses me the fuck off. And people who want her to stay with her parents because supposedly they’re the only ones who love her even though it’s toxic and warped? Like do you have a brain?

Archie and Veronica really love supporting gentrification, classism, and Vee’s rich daddy and mommy’s innocence huh

Look i actually agree with Reggie for once, get Hiram’s ass, deal with it Veronica

Wow, nice, shaming Jug for eating. That’s cool, Arch. That’s awesome. And no Betty, she doesn’t have everybody’s vote. Because Veronica’s parents are motherfuckers and when it comes to choosing between a murderer/abuser/rich/classist/gentrifying fuck and supporting your bestie uwu guess which one im fucking picking. Also, THANK YOU JUG for explaining to your friend that even though he lives in a fantasy land where northside Riverdale is the only one worth referring to when talking about Riverdale at all and thus the only one that matters and is worth protecting, the southside exists and people live and have grown up in the southside and building a prison there where it will be even more easy to profile and incarcerate southside residents under false or exaggerated pretenses ISN’T A GOOD THING. That his own friend isn’t quite apart of his and Veronica’s and Betty’s socioeconomic caste and that he’s not going to pretend like he is, he isn’t going to be quiet about it just because you’re friends again. That he’s not going to lay down and let Archie explain what a good move for Riverdale is when he clearly means northside riverdale, let him explain how the southside needs to be dealt with to someone who grew up on the southside and knows it more (not the most, I’m not saying Jug isn’t out of his depth with certain aspects of being a full southsider) intricately than him. LIKE FUCK. ARCHIE. WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE TALKING TO. Like he just doesn’t get why building prisons and stereotyping and condemning all southsiders and gentrifying entire neighborhoods is really fucking bad and a big deal and it annoys me so much. Like yeah Arch, obviously you don’t see the big deal because it doesn’t affect you and you delude yourself that it doesn’t affect your friend either, but it actually is that bad.

In conclusion, Archie and Veronica and sometimes Betty are giving me headaches rn. Like I’m not saying Jughead is perfect at all but in this particular instance he’s the only one I agree with for the most part right now.

Yeah Arch, you see things differently because you’re not the one who’s on the receiving end of the problem

YES MOMMA ANDREWS. SNAP! GO FERAL! SHOW THAT SOB SOME CONSEQUENCES!

Ah, so this is the jarchie “break-up” scene. You know what. I feel no heartbreak. Get his ass Jug.

Get. His. Ass.

They sent Cheryl to a conversion institution. I’m literally crying. This isn’t an exaggeration. I feel like I want to cry. Just. God fucking damn it.

SHE DOESN’T WANT TO GET BETTER. SHE’S NOT SICK. YOU ARE. DIE. FUCKING DIE. BURN IN HELL. AND PENELOPE BLOSSOM TOO.

“That’s not how things go in Riverdale” is a veiled way of saying “don’t challenge the upper class and don’t try to stifle gentrification,” I hope you all know

[thenixkat]

Voltron notes 1 (edited?)

Ep 1

No spoiler opening theme

Those are some skinny ass space suits. Shouldn’t they have like tethers and shit to keep them from accidently floating off?

Harvesting ice cores on Pluto or Kerberos or whatever

They wanna meet aliens

No one notices the ship until its right on top of them. Shiro just assumes its a hostile ship

Bullshit and lazy. Fuckin aliens speaking and understanding English

Also Shiro looks so much better with the darker skin. Like, bring back this look.

This ship is very green and that’s unusual compared to later lighting schemes 

Lance is a dick to his friend

Also, you’d think an air and space program would weed out the folks with motion sickness

Lance is overestimating the abilities of himself, the crew, and the ship

Welp, Hunk fucked up the electronics with the barf. Pidge fell from not using her seatbelt. 

Mutanious comments.  

Lance got the team killed

Iverson called them jackasses

I know I shouldn’t be mentioning stuff that hasent happened yet but like? How the fuck does Iverson not recognise Pidge? She looks just like her brother but tiny and that didn’t raise any alarms? She didn’t even dye her hair or anything? Also is her mom ok with this? Is she skipping out on her classes that she should be having as Katie?

Vomit is not an approved lubricant. Heh 

One of those chicks has green hair

Military exploration school

Pidge doesn’t know how to keep her mouth shut

Lance is a fuckin bro

Why is Iverson chewin out Lance for something Pidge said?

Poor Lance

Lights out by five? And it's already getting dark?

Ok but Lance and Hunk in civilian clothes makes them stand out so much while they’re trying to sneak around. WHy not carry backpacks with their regular clothes in them while they wear the uniforms until they find a safe place to change. 

Lance is that friend who gets everyone into trouble

Have I mentioned that I hate fat jokes?

Also these kids are shit at sneaking. They didn’t even wait a minute to make sure the patrol dude couldn’t just turn his head and see them. They also made a shit ton of noise.

Pidge is bad at sneaking too, didn’t make sure she wasn’t followed and didn’t keep an eye out for anyone who might spot her on the roof.

Hunk is scared of heights

Pidge is bad at lying

Hunk is nosey af

Lance is trying to be a good team leader

Pidge is trying to uncover a government conspiracy and picked up alien radio chatter. 

If a teenager with little funds and homemade equipment can pick up alien radio chatter than the people who listen to the stars for a living sure as shit picked this shit up.

Lance doesn’t believe in aliens.

Hunk is scared of aliens

School is on lock down

Holy crow. Lance is a potty mouth

Hunk didn’t believe in aliens either

Pidge and Lance jump at the chance to go check out a crashed alien ship. Hunk doesn’t like this.

How the fuck did Pidge remotely hack a camera feed?

Ok but like it makes total sense for them to quarantine Shiro. He might have space pox.

Also Shiro’s skintone changes between 2 dif frames

Hunk neither knows nor cares who Shiro is. And is trying to be the voice of reason

I’m taking that as a fat joke. So fuck you show.

Where’d Keith get the hover car?

Where does Keith get all the explosives? Does he make them?

Lance spotted his eternal rival and doesn’t want to be beat in rescuing the hero. Hunk knows who Keith is

Pidge doesn’t know who Keith is

Why’d they choose that ugly ass tone for Shiro there? He looks kinda grey

Lance was not important enough for Keith to remember him

They’re making Keith take them along for the ride. Also that is not a vehicle designed to carry so many people.

Keith’s got snark.

Pidge yer not doing anything else the least you can do is be useful and keep Shiro from falling off the bike.

Hunk can identify every teacher chasing them

Keith is having fun driving while everyone else screams in terror

So Shiro’s just wearing Keith’s dad’s clothes

Convenient amnesia

Also Shiro’s got a generic ass masculine face

Keith can sense energy

So, those markings and paintings had to have been made by some Native Americans. Which group? What’s the timeframe? Those paintings are showing Blue do stuff so how long was her pilot still around and kicking for? Did she have other pilots before going into lockdown and just chose to stay on Earth? How’d she get to Earth in the first place if fish dude probably died in battle with Galra forces?

Lance hesitates b4 shaking the mystery alien cyborg hand

Hunk is nervous that there might be an alien invasion soon.

Hunk is nosey as hell and a bit of a dick

If I point out everything that is or probably is a fat joke I’ll be here forever

Hunk is smart as hell

Matching a wavelength of an element to a terrain carved by erosion? What? That’s not how anything works

Wait, if Keith has pics of the murals why didn’t they start looking there?

Yeah no those kids are hurt, possibly dead from that fall

The Voltron

The eyes have no pupils and the head isn’t moving, how can you tell the eyes are following you?

So did all of the lions pick these kids and college student from seeing them through Blue’s perspective? How does the lion choosing thing work?

Hunk states the obvious

How is Lance supposed to read the screen when the text is constantly changing. That’s not how computer.

Lance takes Blue on a joy ride and even Keith is not having fun

Also Blue is just fucking up the poor desert

Hunk is a little bitch who thinks giving people what they want will stop them

Holy crow. Hunk has a potty mouth.

So there’s just like a Galra ship right at Earth. The Galra know where Earth is and probably invade it. We just gonna forget about that? Like yes that ship is chasing the lion but nothing is stopping more galra going to Earth.

Shiro is the senior officer so Lance defers to him

So the lions can open wormholes on their own.

Hunk vomits inside Blue

Lance why?

How did none of them notice the castle. Like that is a massive ass castle

They just didn’t check to see if the air was human breathable

Pidge, why the fuck would the steps be bigger if the control seat of the lion was human sized?

Alien tech speaks english

Why do they reuse Cree’s voice for so much

Why do aliens from 10000 yrs ago fucking speak english

Also fucking elves

Also fucking Europeans

Rude. Allura’s first response to meeting an alien is insulting his species looks

Quiznak. Coran has a potty mouth

Also how the fuck do you know anything about this alien’s biology? Why the fuck would a sleeper hold fucking work?

SO why didn’t Alfor use the ‘strongest weapon in the universe’ to fight Zarkon? What, did Black not want any other paladin than Zarkon?

Alfor lies to children.

So how did they send away the other 4 lions? Alfor probably got caught and killed but like from that flashback ep the other three og paladins weren’t in their armor nor shown near the lions or anything. Did the lions hide themselves? Did they have other paladins that piloted them away?

King of the Galra? Bitch he was an emperor well before his fall you should know this.

Convenient amnesia.

How long is the average Galra lifespan?

Could Haggar not? Sense the Blue lion on Earth? How?

Also Haggar really went and got herself a whole ass monster husband

Zarkon calls in the squad. Sends Sendak to fuck shit up

Lance is not good with numbers

Sigh

How do yall even know the food in the castle is safe for humans?

Coran how the fuck u know yall the last Alteans left? Did ya fuckin look?

How the fuck did some nasty ass mice get into the fucking cryopod? How did they survive in a cryopod calibrated for an altean? Why are the mice necessary to the story?

How do the alteans recognize a galra battleship after 10000 yrs?

Lance starts a fight with Keith for no reason. Shiro breaks up the fight.

Did I mention that I hate body functions humor? 

Why and how did Alfor connect the lions to Allura’s life force?

Coran just straight up called Pidge a slightly less stupid than average primitive. Racist as fuck.

Lion’s choose their paladin so Allura just fucking assigns lions to aliens she’s known for less than an hour.

How does she know anything about these aliens? Its been less than 5 mins since she met them.

How the fuck does Allura know here all the lions are but the red one?

How do we know Voltron is the most powerful in the universe? They ain’t seen the entire universe

How do the Alteans know how long an earth hour is?

So an altean brought Green to this planet?

What the fuck kinda dumb ass rabbits come out of hiding when they know strange creatures are near?

To be fair, peaceful might mean something else in Altean. They are fucking space Brits

Hunk asks good questions when he’s not stating the obvious

Also that is a barren ass planet. But it was formerly inhabited.

Hunk rewires alien machinery while under heavy fire

Why does it take so long for yellow’s murals to start glowing? Was Yellow thinking about whether or not she wanted Hunk as her Paladin? Yellow really said if you want me you gotta put in effort.

The Galra were this close to getting Yellow too.

Pidge asks questions.

Who built that pyramid for Green and why did they let it get overgrown?

Pidge somehow didn’t break a leg from that jump

So I’m gonna assume that Blue told Yellow what was up

How well can Yellow move through rock?

Green really wanted Pidge. Like she was lighting shit up immediately.

So Blue actually got pretty damaged from regular ship fire and hiding the ground wrong

Hunk would apparently have let Lance die

Pidge and Shiro are some lyin ass bitches

Lord of the Known Universe. Most of the Galra empire is empty space

It took 600 yrs between a grandfather and grandson altean?

Lance and Hunk vote run

Pidge votes stay and fight

Um. Why would the Galra fuck up Arus when yall are the top priority? Like, sure they can come back for it but the lions are a bigger deal and thus they would chase yall over take Arus

Hunk is making very good points

Also Keith, while Sendak could destroy Arus and then come after yall. It’d be a waste of time and resources. 

Keith votes stay and fight

Shiro chooses not to vote

Alfor’s hologram admits he fucked up with sending the lions away

Allura votes stay and fight and I guess Coran isn’t voting like Shiro

Fuck you show. Why did we need eighteen thousand fuckin fat jokes?

Coran is an asshole

Ok but like that doesn’t look like a good chest plate? Like it looks like if they bent over they’d get poked/stabbed by it? And what’s up with the high sides of the belts?

What the fuck Pidge?! That coulda killed Lance or taken him out for a good while?

Wait, if the ship has a thing that can like just fucking make suits? Why can't they just make more bayards? Why wouldn’t Alfor design something to make more bayards?

Why doesn’t the galra ship have rear view cameras?

Wait! How the fuck do you cut a hole in a space ship and that not fuck with pressurization or set off any safety allarms?! The fuck kinda bullshit is that?

Sendak? Why do you expect aliens to know what that beam was for if you didn’t tell them?

~False surrender is a fucking war crime b/c it removed the option of surrendering for real if the need arrives so it leads to more fucking people dying~

No they didn’t Shiro. Battleships are things that get mass produced. If this is the exact same ship u got put in after the green one then that is bullshit on a cosmic scale.

Shiro is ok with letting prisoners die. Pidge is not, granted it's probably b/c she thinks her family might be on there.

Poor Mrs. Holt. She just got fuckin forgotten by everyone.

So Pidge has an outburst and fucking disobeys the mission leader. Shiro decides to help her just b/c he might know one or two of the people he was willing to let die. And they leave Keith with no fucking backup.

Keith would have legit died if the guards remembered that they have fucking guns and can shoot him when he dropped his shield. Which means Keith would have died if not for plot bullshit b/c his teammates don’t particularly care about his health and safety. Pidge and Shiro care more about the male Holts than Keith and all of the other prisoners that might be on the ship.

Wow.

How does Keith not hold this against them?

No the mice were not necessary, not if either of these dunces whent and opened the control panel from the other side.

That sounds like bullshit. 

Ya know I didn’t have any problems with Hunk the engineer being able to operate an alien elevator or drill by hotwiring shit. But I do call bullshit on Pidge reprogramming a sentry pod thing by changing the connection of one wire.

I still call bullshit on aliens speaking english and all atmospheres being 100% agreeable to humans. B/c that is bullshit

And why the fuck would the color of Rover’s lights fucking change?

… they only checked one fucking room for prisoners but that’s  it I guess? The fuck

Why did the Red lion let the Galra take her? Did she consider that one of the galra on the ship might make a good paladin for her?

Keith gets caught b/c his dumb ass starts shouting on a stealth mission

Keith, they already have the lion. Yer the one trying to take it

Like I said previously the guards forget they have guns and thus Keith lives.

So… how did Keith impress the Red lion? He fought people, lost and blew out the airlock. Which is still a loss if the lion didn’t feel like saving him.

Vore

Guards continue to forget they have fucking guns for plot reasons.

Hunk and the gang leave without destroying the enemy ship or making sure that its irreparably damaged

Coran, Lance, and Hunk have foul mouths

And this is why you fucking confirm yer kill

Why isn’t there a combine button?

Heh, Yellow’s face after slamming Red. Also Red looks so offended about being rammed. 

What the cheese

Hunk’s gone into panic mode and Keith has accepted death.

Shiro gives a speech and they form Voltron

Why are the bad guys giving them the time to form voltron?

Why doesn’t Voltron have a tail? Where does Black’s tail go? Voltron should have a tail.

Any other prisoners on that ship are dead as fuck

How did I watch this show  the first time? It's not good. It’s pretty but it is not good.

[bang7an]

A list of BTS’ UNOFFICIALLY RELEASED socially-conscious, non-love songs:

Not only does BTS have a bunch of socially-conscious officially released tracks, they have a ton of unofficial/non-group releases with meaningful lyrics as well.

OT7

흔한 연습생의 크리스마스 (A Typical Trainee’s Christmas) * = about the insignificance of holidays to trainees and feeling lonely, overwhelmed, and belittled because of the industry’s expectations

Born Singer * = about pursuing your passion despite criticism from society and the uncertainty of the future

흔한 아이돌의 크리스마스 (A Typical Idol’s Christmas) * = comments on how the grass is not always greener on the other side; about feeling overwhelmed due to the work load/expectations of being an idol. also a thank you to ARMYs for continuously supporting them 

So 4 More * = about constantly working harder in order to  pursue one’s passions and to reach one’s dreams

We Are Bulletproof PT 1 4 BEGINS Ruff * = about surpassing your rivals by being yourself & not letting other people’s words get to you

RM, Suga & Jin

학교의눈물 (School of Tears) * = comments on the apathy of the current education system that pits children against each other and teaches students to step on the weak to rise to the top

어른아이 (Adult Child) * = about how reaching the age of adulthood is not as special and revolutionary as others make it seem; it is just another chapter in the book called Life. also a shout of gratitude to Korea’s armed forces who are often forced to serve for 2 years when they reach the age of adulthood

Jungkook, Jimin & J-Hope

졸업 (Graduation) * = about seeking freedom from the educational system and realizing everyone will take a different path towards their respective dreams

RM, Suga & J-Hope

땡 (DDAENG) * = about thanking the antis and internet trolls for their dedication because BTS used their hate to motivate them to rise to even higher fame and success

RM & J-Hope

널 웃게 할 노래 (The Song That Will Make You Smile by Lee Seung Gi ft. Rap Monster & J-Hope) = RM & J-Hope’s part is about not being afraid of standing tall and facing one’s adversaries head on

RM & Jungkook

Like A Star * = about regret for being afraid of being different from others and not pursuing one’s dreams/passions

알아요 (I Know) * = a thank you to male and female ARMYs for supporting them the last 3 years & a promise to be always there for ARMYs in the future

RM & V

네시 (4 O’CLOCK) * = about that ambiguous time between night and day when the blue moonlight seems to stop time and you can heal from the chaos of the light/reality

Jimin & V

95 Graduation * = about how fast time flies & the importance of preserving and remembering the past that was built to create the present. also an apology to their classmates for not being able to attend their graduation

RM

Hookgayo (w/ Iron & Supreme Boi) = calls out the repetitiveness of the industry & artists who use swear words/graphic content simply to catch the interest of the general public (a response to Brave Brother’s diss track “Round and Round,” where he dissed producers, like Bang Shi Hyuk PD)

Fuck Cockroachez (w/ Zico) = about facing the uncertainty of the future and staying strong

Seventeen = about feeling lost in the world and not knowing how to actualize your dreams. comments on how only you can take control of your life

DREAMIN = about taking the unbeaten path and looking towards the future while never forgetting one’s humble beginnings

Glory = about pursuing your passions despite the disapproval of people around you

Naa = about the sweetness of pursuing one’s dreams and the curious beckoning of the unknown future

Suicide = about the feeling of failure even when others label you as a success

7 Dayz (w/ Popinjay) = about how dreams cannot always shield you from reality

130305 = about newbies who disrespect the senior artists that came before them

Tipsy (w/ Supreme Boi) = about pursuing your passions not for the applause, but for your own pleasure and personal satisfaction

94 Line Rap (w/ 삼순, 윤달, Suprema, Kyum2, LUPE, Wildbuck) = about the power of attacking your haters mentally rather than physically

Swag Player (w/ Tangent) = dissing wanna-be-rappers that compare themselves to those from the underground scene

You Can’t Do That (대남협 w/ Supreme Boi, i11evn, Marvel J, Kyum2) = addressing haters that say idol rappers can’t be considered truly “hip-hop”

Check the voice (w/ 라이머, 문화의사대, Black $heep, rap k.o, 문스피어, Kwind, TL, 몽숭이, Star Yankie, 찌질보이, 대포, BLAGI) = about ignoring the haters and looking straight ahead

Listen To Me = about breaking the music industry by being one with the beat

닥투 (Vote, or Just Shut Up) * = telling people we should voice our opinions by exercising our right/power to vote

Party (XXO) [Lyrics by RM] * = about fighting hatred with love & standing up for the minorities of the world. also contains pro-LGBT lyrics

I Like That [Lyrics by RM] * = about self-love & being independent and confident after a break up

FREESTYLE * = about the uncertainty of the future & the societal pressures that come with choosing music over college

FREESTYLE 2 = about how his tears for the past have dried & how he can’t go back now. also about being grateful and wanting to give thanks/strength to the people who have helped him along the way

FREESTYLE 3 * = about feeling lonely in a room full of people & the importance of self-motivation to reach your dreams/success

Freestyle 4 * = about longing for a past when time was infinite and dreams were limitless

Rap Monster * = about his dream to lead the new generation of hip hop by writing and conveying his own words/message

Where U At * = about the uncertainty of the future in such a competitive/saturated job market. also comments on how today’s youth is explicitly taught that money isn’t everything, but is implicitly pressured to earn a high salary

Too Much * = about feeling alone and trying to find where one belongs (in this case, he is rapping about the rejection he feels from hip hop fans for being an “idol” and idol fans for being a “monster”). also a question as to whether one can be truly happy/content in life

Unpack Your Bags (w/ DJ Soulscape) * = about the difference between his “idol” self and his “non-idol” self & the path towards finding his true identity

P.D.D (Please Don’t Die w/ Warren G) * = about serving revenge to haters by using the hate as a stepping stone for success

부끄부끄 (Bucku Bucku by MFBTY ft. EE, Dino J, RM) * = RM’s part is about showing magnanimity to the haters out of pity. he also gives respect to the seniors that he had always looked up to and are now able to write songs with

목소리 (Voice) * = about overcoming his past and finding his true source of happiness in music

Do You * = about living without labels/societal restrictions and doing “the fuck you want!”

각성 (覺醒/Awakening) * = addressing the fear and inevitability of failure. also about embracing the title of “idol” & not letting the label restrict his mind or actions

Monster = about becoming better than your haters by enjoying what you do everyday

농담 (Joke) * = “I’ll say one word about your rap, don’t rap.”

God Rap = about accepting and loving oneself, as well as accepting and not ridiculing others with different beliefs/views

Rush (ft. Krizz Kaliko) * = about preventing the negativity from affecting you by focusing on your own life

Life * = questioning the differing levels of loneliness that people feel and the blurred line between life and death

표류 (Drift) * = about trying to determine one’s purpose in life, but feeling lost

I Believe * = about trusting oneself and making the most out of one’s life by following one’s heart

튀겨 (ProMeTheUs by Yankie ft. Dok2, Juvie Train, Double K, RM, Topbob, Don Mills) * = RM’s part is about seniors/the older generations who look down towards and dismiss the youth

always * = about feeling like the world is not listening to you and will never be able to accept you for who you are

Change (w/ Wale) * = about trying to change the current state of the world we live in. also comments on the corrupt education system and police brutality, as well as cyberbullying

코끼리 (Gajah/Elephant by Gaeko ft. RM) * = RM’s part is about fighting for oneself and not letting life/destiny push you around

SUGA/AGUST D

Diss = about how you can’t buy talent with money

Swagger = about being destined for success

All I Do Is Win = about surpassing your competition by improving yourself day by day

싸이하누월 MIX Final * = about how music is a part of him & not being afraid to display his true self, despite the stigma that comes with the label “idol”

Agust D * = about rising from the bottom to the top and breaking away from the stigma of “K-Pop” and “idol”

give it to me * = “Born tiger, ain’t gonna live like a dog.”

치리사일사팔 (724148) * = about pursuing your passions to reach success. also comments on social classes and the priviledge of old money

140503 새벽에 (140503 at dawn) * = about loneliness and pretending to be okay on the outside while fighting your inner struggles. also comments on his social phobia, that was an onset of his restricted lifestyle as a trainee

마지막 (The Last) * = about the dangers of comparing oneself to others & not recognizing who one has become. comments on self-hatred, depression, social phobia, suicide, and mental health. also about the sweetness of success after hardship & learning to find pride in one’s self-esteem

Tony Montana (ft. Yankie) * = about the switch from wishing for the downfall of others, to focusing on his own success and taking care of his family, fans, and team. also about the trials that come with rising from the bottom to the top

so far away (ft. SURAN) * = about the meaningless of living life without a purpose/dream, but also struggling to find that purpose. in addition, conveys a message of hope that one will find happiness through hard work and not giving up on the seemingly impossible

J-Hope

Animal (Jo Kwon ft. J-HOPE) = about not letting anyone take control of your passions (in this case he’s talking about his passion to perform)

1 VERSE * = about the gratification of watching your hard work and effort come to fruition

Hope World * = about opening up oneself to the world and living with hope

P.O.P (Piece of Peace), Pt. 1 * = about the role of music in bringing about change and comfort in a chaotic world

백일몽 Daydream * = about dreaming the impossible dreams and living life without fear of restrictions

Base Line * = about discovering the “base line,” the inner catalyst, that drive’s one’s motivations and achievements

항상 (HANGSANG ft. Supreme Boi) * = about how BTS is his driving force and his pride in reaching the top with his members by his side. also about his hope that they will be together forever

Airplane * = about reminiscing on his youth, when he used to dream of the skies, and finally realizing that he has surpassed his childhood goals

Blue Side (Outro) * = about wanting to preserve his memories of his younger, naive self, even if it’s through a dream

name: video w/ lyrics

=: live performance/dance practice

*: official music video/trailer/SoundCloud release

[anxietydiaries]

ugh

If only people knew where i came from. They would listen, awaken, broken and beaten.

You'd think that I’d be sitting here thinking about everything, but my head is filled with holes, life with no meaning.

 All that people have ever said to me, but their words don't even matter, you can only learn so much from an idiot, when you think that you know the world as much as the world did.

When you sit there thinking about all of the things that you believe, knowing that life is futile, alone and at ease.

And thinking about whether you're right or wrong, thinking that you have it all. for me, it's more about morality, it's not perfect, but it works, because its raw..

Morality is a non-arguable stance, you can't make’em shift, you can't make em dance. you can't change their mind unless they themselves choose to do so, and experience something that makes the colors change.

Your mind is only something that you choose to change, no one else can do that unless faced with the brave, the active decision to have a discussion is there in one single place. Yet you all argue over the same tired talking points. racism, sexisim, gender, and choice.

when you wake up in the morning, is the first thing you do is think about what you might argue today? Do you think about who you are going to piss off, or hurt, harass, embarrass, or shame?

Do you even consider for one second how your actions can affect someone?

I really doubt it, because you only think of yourself and what you want, and then some. 

What's really funny to me is that there are people who exist that try to do the right thing, saying wise things, yet have all the wrong knowledge. What an anomaly, special, but pointless.

Can you really live with yourself knowing that you believed in lies, and tried to use the past to justify your retarded guise? the past is a poor argument. yet People sit there and say, the past is in the past, and we need to focus on change. the world isn't so black and white and blue and gray.

I know when people say that, they worry more of leaving things behind, but that justifies nothing, than learning from lies, it's the past and they should use that for their future. It’s super annoying. but it's important, its for our overture.

With today's social climate, i hate that people use the past to attack others, yet they never grasp,  using insults to tear someone down mentally and emotionally, how do you live, knowing that damage is overkill? 

while sitting on their computer and phones complaining about the word “retard” and crying on about how its a slur when the term is allocated to the damage of technology.

 You’d really think that people can be more intelligent, but really they're stupid as fuck. It leaves me worried with everything that's going on, and yet people think that the world sucks.

Lack of empathy is a mental illness on earth, yet no one notices at all. We live in a world where people treasure their material possessions to the point of tearing others down. their looks and numbers and “wins” when they're really losses. funny how that that shit never matters. 

Making me sick to my stomach, celebrating someone's death like that, what is wrong with people? well you can fuck off, because the same goes to you, now die with the masses. 

 You know it doesn't matter who you support, at the end of the day the decision will be made and yet you sit here thinking you’re on the throne, when you're really sitting on a pile of graves.

Fuck these people and everything they're about, why do we have to live with so much misinformation and doubt. YOU HAVE BEEN LIED TO, DON'T YOU SEE THAT? i'm a very moral person, so it doesn't add up. 

You think you're invincible, yet get your ass beat, if you have anything to say, you get whipped on the streets. Life ain't so precious when it's that easy, to find death, outside in the beautiful world.

Hiding behind your phones and keyboards, you think you're really brave, when really you're a weakling, smashing windows and vets graves. You're just a fly, easy to kill, but think you move fast when you're caught in your lies, but once your found, people smash you down, and you delete your tweet like you never made a sound. 

HELLO!? the wayback machine is a thing! once it's on the internet, its there for eternity, you cant hide your shit personality, so hold your breath, with your senseless atrocity.

So i suggest one thing, use that brain of yours, the thing in your head! You're not even real, you're dead. because remember, many people have died. but that doesnt matter, because you're selfish inside.

You all cry on about abortion yet you sit there sad and disappointed, your life has no value, as much as the chain around your neck, you're worthless, and pathetic at best. Your useless, you think fucking for fun is worth it, and then once you get pregnant you throw it away like you never even heard it, and then you turn gay.

Stop opening your legs and get a brain you pathetic insect, my life started off on an off beat, and here i am, im finally breathing. Yeah my chest is tight, and i panic every night, but i'm alive and that's all that matters, because my life really does matter. 

At 17, i could have killed myself, i could have died but i choose to think about it, and i'm really glad that i did, because it would have been a waste of my time and my energy to die without clearing my sins.

You think you had it worse? yeah sure thing, everyone's different, but you'll never know somebody's pain, until you learn to SHUT THE FUCK UP AND START LISTENING! its bears repeating, our whole world is glistening.

You're an ant, you're a flea, you're a parasite, living off government money, while you sit and flex on his cumming, you can't take it back and cry in your clean sheets.

Waiting for love, and you still cry, but love never comes, yet you wonder why, you're really alone, and you are the problem. Thinking you're great, when you're really nothing.

You're fat and alone and youre sad, you sit in the dark staring at your hand, wondering why you're alive. “KILL YOURSELF!! DO IT!!! I DARE YOU!!!” all of you peons, so pathetic, YOU'RE SCARED TOO!!! Sitting there fighting over nothing, but fame, and numbers and money.

When will you wake up and realize that world doesn't revolve around you? oh that's right, you're to busy only voting blue. 

the KKK, the liars and cheaters, the only people that you won't even breed with. Don't have kids, don't ever spawn, because its a waste of your time. Go ahead and sit open and bare, you're a wasteland of lies that you always wear. Ears glued shut, mouth wide open, swallowing every bit of jizz he pours in your mouth. 

Do you feel like a queen, a king, or a princess? Oh yeah thats right, that doesn't exist. 

So say my name, you don't know it, because you're a prostitute living off men. They don't actually care about you, they care for your body, you're a walking talking hypocrite. 

How you say? Now let me be clear, you're a pathetic whore living off jeers. It's embarrassing, and pathetic, i hope this make you cry, mostly out of the realization that you have nothing to supply.

The hearts of men are being used, and that's manipulation my guy. You're the worst kind of women if you don't really care, so sit there and take it all in. Because what i'm saying should make it all clear. 

My body my choice but you choose to open your legs.

My body my choice but you choose to say yes. 

My body my choice but you choose no protection, i hope you get a huge staph infection. 

My body my choice, you chose cum inside, and here you are a week later, on your knees, vomit, crying. 

WHAT HAVE I DONE? you cry to yourself, you whored yourself out for just ANYONE.

OH dear little ant, sit back and hear what i say. My body my choice is a pathetic disgrace. 

Hello, im adopted, nice to meet you! im free, my mother did cocaine, yet that's why i am here. If it went any further i could have died, and that'd be it, the end, good night.

But i'm happy to be here, i cherish every moment, knowing that my mother loved me enough to put me up for adoption.

I sit before you, grinning with teeth, knowing that i have a mother and father who love me endlessly. 

I can sing, i can dance, i can read really well, but what can you do? But sit there with your fancy nails.

I've heard everything, the same tired arguments. Its too hard, i have no meny, i CAN'T TAKE RESPONSIBILITY. 

What's it like to learn nothing and be mentally ill? knowing that i am yet one child who sits here eternally bare. bearing my own, taking it in stride, and life bests me from the inside, i keep fighting and breathing and winning, yet here you are, on your knees still whimpering.

oh little ant, you're so sad, i'm sorry that you lost your dad. lets make things better, now give it a think...

you're more responsible for yourself than the universe might think.

But you don't want that, you sit and you pray, wishing and hoping your baby is dead. 

How sad, how lucid, how empty you might be, to be a baby killer, sitting on her knees. 

you know i had a thought, so please hear me out. this wouldn't have happened if you never got out. if you stayed in your mom and lived your whole live, that abortion would have been perfect for snuffing you out, from the inside.

we are human beings, parasites of the land, so take it upon yourself to realize this. MY life could have perished, yet here i sit typing this. What are the words that you think you speak, nothing but blahs, and sighs, and eeps.

“WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? CRY ABOUT IT?” shut the fuck up bitch, and lie about it. 

you got so much dick in your mouth you can barely speak. thank you cum for brains for letting me speak.

good night. 

[shenanigans-and-imagines]

Imagines Sentence Prompts

Feel free to ask from the list below, or something you come up with on your own.

This is not a list of my own creation.  I’m sorry I’m not sure where to find the original.

1.     “Marry me.”

2.     “Do you want me to leave?”

3.     “You are not going without me.”

4.     “I can’t believe you!

5.     “I swear it won’t happen again.”

6.     “What did you say?”

7.     “I’m not jealous.”

8.     “You’re jealous, aren’t you?”

9.     “We can’t keep doing this.”

10.  “Isn’t this amazing?”

11.   “I’m going to take care of you, okay?”

12.  “Stay the night. Please.”

13.   “You can’t die. Please don’t die.”

14.  “Run away with me.”

15.  “Quit whining.”

16.   “Get outta my sight!”

17.  “Why are you so annoying?”

18.  “Were you ever going to tell me?”

19.  “Never in a million years.”

20.  “Don’t ask me that…”

21.  “I might have had a few shots.”

22.  “What’s with the box?”

23.  “W- What are you doing?”

24.  “Say it!”

25.  “I could kiss you right now!”

26.  “Are you done with that?”

27.  “What’s going on here?”

28.   “Stop pinning this on me! You started it!”

29.  “It’s your fault we’re in this mess.”

30.  “Did you do this on purpose?!”

31.  “Kiss me.”

32.   “Are you still awake..?”

33.  “Excuse you?”

34.   “This is all your fault!”

35.  “I can’t believe you dragged me into this.”

36.  “Don’t give me that look! It wasn’t my fault!”

37.  “I shouldn’t be in love with you!”

38.  “It’s not fair!”

39.  “I could kill you right now!”

40.   “Knock it off!”

41.  “Screw you!”

42.  “You’re a complete moron!”

43.  “I can’t be in love with you!”

44.  “Make me.”

45.  “Don’t tempt me.”

46.  “I hate you.”

47.  “You are infuriating!”

48.  “Just shut up already.”

49.  “That doesn’t even make sense.”

50.  “Bite me.”

51.  “Eat me.”

52.  “Kiss my ass.”

53.  “Just admit I’m right.”

54.  “Just admit you’re wrong.”

55.  “You are being ridiculous!”

56.  “That’s irrational.”

57.  “Listen to me!”

58.   “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

59.  “Don’t yell at me.”

60.  “That’s it. End of discussion.”

61.  “I don’t believe you.”

62.  “You shouldn’t have said that.”

63.  “Fuck you!”

64.  “Shut your mouth before I shut it for you.”

65.  “How dare you?”

66.   “I dare you!”

67.  “It’s you, it’s always been you.”

68.  “Well this is awkward…”

69.  “Just pretend to be my date”.  

70.  “Are you really gonna leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”

71.  “I just did some calculations, and I’ve been able to determine that you’re full of shit.”

72.  “Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they’d lock us up?”

73.  “Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.”

74.   “Can I touch your boob?”

75.  “It’s not that you’re wrong, exactly, you’re just extremely not right.”

76.  “You shouldn’t be trusted with small children, should you?”

77.  “Give me cake or give me death.”

78.  “On a scale from, ’I can sometimes make important phone calls without crying’ to ’I have a stable job with a steady income, a spouse who loves me, a dog, and two kids who are screwed up minimally at worst’, how much of an adult are you?”

79.  “You think I’m dumb enough to fall for that stupid move?”

80.  “Despite the cliche, it’s not me, it’s you.”

81.  “Obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met that you love her, but it sucks that you can’t.”

82.  “No, it was my fault for thinking that you might care.”

83.  “When you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy… even then. Specially then!”

84.  “If you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are we doing anyway?”

85.  “I think I’ve been holding myself back from falling in love with you all over again.”

86.  “What have I told you about the toilet seat?”

87.  “I tried to change the duvet and I got stuck inside.”

88.  “I vote today to be a pajama day.”

89.   “You have to tell me why we’re committing a felony before we do it. Not that that’s going to stop us, but at least I’ll have all the facts.”

90.  “I don’t leave messages. If I wanted to talk to a machine, I’d talk to my VCR.”

91.   “You know we’re suppose to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you, and you know it, too. I know you do.”

92.  “Those things you said yesterday… Did you mean them?”

93.  “I’m not going to apologize for this. Not anymore.”

94.  “What I hear when I’m being yelled at is people caring loudly at me.”

95.  “I am NOT crying, okay?! I’m allergic to jerks!”

96.  “This would not happen if I had a penis!”

97.  “That’s almost exactly the opposite of what I meant.”

98.  “All nighter, you and me. First one to fall sleep buys the other dinner.”

99.  “I don’t think I’ve ever played spin the bottle.”

100.  “Sorry! I didn’t mean to touch your butt.”

101.   “I’m ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”

102.  “To the night you’ll never remember!”

103.  “Could I sit here? All the other tables are full.”

104.  “You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!”

105.   It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line.”

106. “This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done.“

107.  “It’s a real shame nobody asked for your opinion.”

108.  “I could do that, but could doesn’t mean would.”

109.  “You cannot fathom the immensity of the fucks I don’t give.”

110.  “You’re like, five feet tall. How you gonna reach me, shortie?”

111.  “I recognize that you have reached a decision, but given that it is a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”

112.  “Do you need me to kill someone for you?

113.   “I’m gonna lay down and die for like half hour okay?”   

114.  “It’s midnight, what do you want?”

115.   “You are completely unfit to handle a child.”

116.  “We have to get out of this place. It is EVIL.”

117.  “Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

118. “When in doubt curl into the fetal position and give up on life.”

119.  “It’s not a double date, we’re just third and fourth wheeling.”

120. “Your hair is so soft…”

121.  “You’re so cute when you pout like that!”

122.  “Just relax, I’ll wash your hair for you.”

123.  “I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”

124. “Are you wearing my shirt?”

125.  You are ridiculously comfortable…”

126. “I’ve had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with…”

127.  “You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this…”

128. “You’re beautiful, you know that?”

129.  We should get a puppy!”

130. Don’t apologize. That’s not the point. Did you mean it?”

131.   ”This is an apology pizza. Please take it or I will start crying right here.”

132.  ”I thought I lost you”

133.  ”Okay, when you say love, do you mean love as in like loving pizza or as in love, love?”

134. ”They don’t like dogs. It wasn’t going to work out.”

135.  ”The hills are alive, with the sound of bullshit.”

136.  “I feel like I’m losing control.”

137. “Okay, am I drunk or did you really just say that?”

138.  “I’m too sober for this shit.”

139.   “God, I missed you.”

140. “I let you down. How am I supposed to forgive myself for that?”

141.   “Okay, the blood isn’t mind, calm down.”

142.   “Did you really think I’d leave?”

143.  “There’s a difference between being brave and being stupid.”

144.  “You’re proud of me?”

145.  “If love was easy, we’d be writing songs about better things. Like pizza.”

146. “Is this supposed to be this hard?”

147. “They’re going to hate me.”

148.  “Like I’d choose the laws of physics over you.”

149.   “Did you just blue shell me!?”

[1badthing1goodthing]

#3

The bad thing.

This story from NPR: A Trump Swing Voter Looks Ahead.

I don’t know why I read this.

We are supposed to be listening to each other more, right? I mean, that is the popular thing to say. It’s what Obama told us to do. It is what, as an educator who hears more and more stories from teachers of students literally refusing to even hear other points of view in their classrooms these days, I do want to tell children to do. At least in a learning environment, you sure as hell don’t have to agree but you should be open to listening. So even though I don’t actually believe that people who have been oppressed have any responsibility whatsoever to listen more to their oppressors, as a teacher, sometimes I want to practice what I preach. And NPR is good at laying out stories in a matter of fact way, a way that probably wouldn’t make me too mad. 

That’s the reason I gave myself for clicking on it. But after reading it, I realized the actual reason was probably just because I’m an idiot, and I thought the “looks ahead” portion of this headline meant that this swing voter had realized the error of their ways after seeing the Cabinet of Incompetence and Ill Will that Trump is trying to get into place, or after watching his ridiculous shit show of a press conference that proved he only ever wants to campaign for the rest of his life and has developed absolutely no interest in actually governing. Maybe they looked more into who Vladimir Putin actually is and what he has done and it’s left them a little scared. Maybe they’re ready to apologize and move forward with us.

You already know, dear reader, that that was not the case.

I can’t get this short and simple story out of my head because it feels personal. Jamie Ruppert is my age, living in my corner of my home state. She’s one of the people who broke my heart into pieces when I saw Pennsylvania go red on election night, the final dagger in my soul. She seems sweet. She is quick to report that she voted for Obama twice. That she loves gay people. She might have been my friend in high school. 

After thinking about Jamie Ruppert for quite some time, I’ve realized that I don’t hate her. John Lewis tells us we shouldn’t hate, and so I’m not. I don’t hate Jamie Ruppert. But god, she makes me frustrated.

The reason she voted for Trump is the reason that so many millions of Americans say they voted for Trump. Because of the economy. Because she wants more things to say “Made in the USA.” Because she misses the blue collar jobs that Pennsylvania used to find so plentiful in our coal mines and steel mills. But the thing is, SHE IS DOING WELL! Her husband has a job that pays well enough for her to stay at home with her two, soon to be three kids! They JUST BOUGHT A HOUSE!

Jamie Ruppert is literally living the American dream. But because the America around her doesn’t look exactly the same way as it did when her parents were her age, she looks her American dream right in the face and says, eh, you know what? You are just not good enough.

You voted for Obama twice, Jamie Ruppert. You said you didn’t want to vote for Hillary because she promised more of the same, which you all of a sudden realized you didn’t want anymore. But you also said you care about the economy, Jamie. Obama helped fix the economy. Helping bring us out of the recession, job growth, decreased unemployment, all of it! We still have a lot to do but goddamn our dollar is strong as hell right now! HE DID WHAT YOU WANTED!

Of course, we all know that when someone says it’s about the economy, the ACTUAL reason is a deep rooted misogyny and racism that they can’t face. But still, for the people like Jamie who seem sincere, who want those blue collar jobs back, I mean, I get that. We all want that. But here’s the thing. They have been gone for so long?

Jamie, you and I both grew up in Northeastern Pennsylvania in the 90s, right? Did you also go on a coal mine tour as an elementary school field trip? We did that because the mine was empty. Because it is a vestige of our past. The Steamtown Mall had a coal powered train in the food court out of nostalgia, not out of pride in a surging industry. A fading paper distribution company named Dunder Mifflin is a more accurate portrayal of the Scranton/Wilkes-Barre economy.

Billy Joel produced a song about the factories shutting down in Allentown in NINETEEN EIGHTY TWO FOR CHRIST’S SAKE.

Coal mining, the auto industry, maybe they can come back in some way. Come back meaning, not die completely. That’s at least what the auto industry seems to be doing. And lord knows coal is still cheap as hell and we still use a lot of energy. But it’s never going to be like it was. It hasn’t been for decades. Why are we pretending like all of a sudden in 2017 it’s just happened?

And say you really did believe that the blue collar jobs of white Republicans’ wet dreams could come back. Do you really believe that Donald Trump, a Yankee billionaire, is going to do that for you? Even his Make America Great Again hats were made in China. You know why? Donald Trump knows how to make money. That’s all he cares about (along with being liked). Nobody who’s as greedy and selfish as Donald Trump is ever going to choose a more expensive and risky option just for labor’s sake. China, Indonesia, Vietnam. They make our products cheap and fast. We buy them. American businessmen make money. That’s what made Donald Trump. He isn’t going to change it.

Sure, he’ll keep making these announcements about companies keeping jobs in the US because of him, even though most of those companies made those decisions without any input from Trump whatsoever. But it’s good, free PR for those companies to go along with it, so hey, they won’t complain. And they’re satisfying, easily digestible stories for the American public. They make more of an impact than just saying “We added howevermany jobs to the economy this month.” That’s just a number. A plant keeping jobs in Michigan, that’s a story. It’s brilliant, really. It’s effective. But that doesn’t make it real. Those stories are still just tiny drops in a very big bucket, and the water filling that bucket isn’t changing.

And by the way, when those blue collar jobs were making America great? Guess what actually made them great. *whisper shouts* UNIONS. And if you think Trump is going to bring back unions, well, then I really don’t know what kind of drugs you’re on.

It’s just so enragingly disingenuous to say you care about the economy when all you actually care about is a nostalgic fantasy. Because there is a lot that DOES make America great. We continue to be the innovative business leader of the world. The technology that now sits in the pockets of children and adults from sub-Saharan Africa to the Middle East was first created in America. Not that the San Francisco tech world is that perfect either (lord knows none of those devices were actually MADE in Mountain View or Cupertino), but still. There are exciting things happening. Young people are rebuilding Detroit. There are industries (like renewable energy, say) that are just WAITING for young excited people to develop and innovate in. And those innovations could then possibly lead to blue - collar - jobs.

And one last thing. If you care about the economy? If, unlike Jamie Ruppert, you ARE still affected by the recession, and all of Obama’s economic progress still means jackshit to you? Or if you’re doing okay but still hurting? Banks, and billionaires like Trump, are your enemy. Then BERNIE SANDERS is your guy, not Trump. He understands why the recession happened. It was his WHOLE THING. And yeah, I know, Bernie didn’t win, but you’d think you’d want to still follow his advice. And his advice was: don’t be fucking idiots, America.

We didn’t listen.

I know, of course, that people like Jamie Ruppert just don’t care enough to think about all of this. They lead comfy enough lives that they don’t have to. She probably doesn’t watch the news much. She’s about to have three small kids. It’s a busy life. She had just enough time to look around her and think about how America, and her little corner of it, looks different than it used to. And the anxiety that produces? That’s enough. That’s enough to ruin it for everyone else.

Even though those changes that make one person anxious–they could be another person’s entire future. It could mean people get to dream dreams that they were never able to before. It could mean greater equality, better justice, which, by the way, often leads to a stronger economy. In all organic systems, diversity is good. Diversity is necessary for survival. Change could mean America continuing to be the freest, most successful nation on the planet. It could mean so much.

But Jamie probably doesn’t know enough of those other people. Those people that see a different America as exciting instead of worrisome.

So the anxiety lives on.

The good thing.

Times are tough. You might not have loved Obama as much or as thoroughly as I did. I get it. It’s fine. But god, his farewell address? We all deserved that. We deserved that last bit of eloquence and level headed-ness, intelligence and class. We deserved taking some time to just splash around in the joy of his and Joe’s friendship, and in the way he looked at Michelle and the way she looked back, the way his young daughter full of black girl magic clapped and wiped her eyes. And if you didn’t let yourself enjoy even that–well, I hope there’s something in your life that makes you happy. Because we need to cherish those things. Or else we’ll all break.

[rupertacton]

RUOBAL ETOV

I'm in Baxter's Court on Mare Street. Day before Thursday the 8th of June. 2017. What am I doing? Not applying for jobs. Fuck it. Can't concentrate. Everything. Confused. Vote Labour sticker on the 2nd hand Ralph shirt. Shit coffee. Dreaming of a better future. Nightmare visions of division. We have always been divided. Us and them. Me and you. Here and there. Be here now. No. Not me. I'm voting. Don't know why. Always do. Everything changes but you. But nothing. Deep fucking state we're in. The Deep State in a deep state. Arm everyone. Radical deradicalisation. Totally fucking radical dude. Arsenal. Millwall. The classic dichotomy. It's not that. Never was. I've crossed London Bridge thousands of times. Troubled bridges. Turbulent waters. Pont de la Tour. What's the point? Intern me first. My turn. I do not share your shared values. Do not share that with me. Not interested. Fucking cops everywhere. Reading my emails. Tapping my dreams. I dream of Friday not being shit. Every simple question. The answers are complicated. Extreme rationalists. Silicon roundabout reactionary fuckheads. Neither Left nor Right. Always right. Without fail. They, hate, our, way, of, life. WAYS OF LIFE. RIGHTS OF WAY. Pluralism. Tolerance. Most people just want to live a peaceful life. MORE ARMED POLICE. No. I stand for law and order. As long as it doesn't apply to me. As long as I get to choose my transgressions without punishment. Vote tactically to stay in the EU. Vote tactically for more years of those cunts. They don't really like you. They wouldn't get a round in even if they had the fucking bunce. Which they do. Rolling in it. Coffee is cold. I drink it anyway. How can I escape? Escape the shit opinions. My own included. I AM ALWAYS WRONG ABOUT EVERYTHING. Take. Take. Take. Hot takes. Cold coffee. Keep calm and drink tea. Run through fields of wheat. Fields of gold. Twee fucks on miniature railways taking us to model concentration camps. I LOVE EU. I don't. You value that over everything else? Reassess your fucking values. Old people are not the enemy. The North is not the enemy. Enemies within. Enemies of the state. The state can do better than paying private companies to do what the state did. It worked. It can be reformed. The state must be destroyed. Apart from the bits we need. The weak deserve protection. Anything else is fascism. Sorry if you don't class yourself as that. Sorry. Not sorry. LOL. Crypto-memetic-libertarian-neo-reaction-alt-Nick-Land-LD50-nihilist-ancap-manosphere-hipster-cunt-fuckwits. Not important. Not significant. But there. Right there. Right at the heart. The right at the heart. Analysing. Guilty feats of algorithms. Sorry. They will all jump in bed to defeat the common enemy. Us. I'm cynical. Sarcastic. I'm sincere. I sincerely love the young people who can tell what's up. Don't infect them with your cynicism. Your grown up opinions. They want housing. They want a country that gives a fuck about them. What is better about what you want? Is it that you already have it? Is that it? That's it. Ask yourself those hard questions. Don't shy away from the answers. Just because you liked some rap music in the 90's. You did pills. You went out and got shitfaced. You smoked some fucking spliffs. You listened to some dub. You like proper left wing politics. You are tired of identity politics. It has ruined your fun. Your right to free speech. Your right to pontificate on problems that aren't yours. You can't bring yourself to vote for THEM because of HIM. Because what? Because anti-semitism? Because Abbott? Because Brexit? Because you are definitely not a Tory? Because shambles? Because lack of talent? Because mediocrity? We would probably have a right laugh down the boozer. We would probably agree on a lot of things. SUCK IT UP. Ask yourself some very hard questions. And suck it up. Take it on the chin. HOPE. HOPE. HOPE. FUCKING HOPE. I can't stand it. I'm not a fucking doorstepper. Activist. But. Thank. Fuck. Some. People. Are. I can offer a kind of support. Support in kind. New Labour. Blue Labour. Dr. Who Labour. Harry fucking Potter Labour. Old Labour. Momentum Labour. Militant Tendency. Satire Labour. If you identify as left wing and you are going to vote Tory what the actual fuck are you playing at? Playing. You watch the fucking West Wing and think it's reality. House of Cards. It will come crashing down around everyones ears. LOL. People will die. I was working in Westminster last summer and I wish I'd punched Liam Fox in the face. Regrets. I've had a few. There is a clear choice. Terms that I don't really want to hear anymore. Echo chamber. Virtue signalling. Strong and stable. Coalition of chaos. Enough is enough. Enough is enough already. Y Tribe. Tribal politics. Bit heavy on the politics this. Sorry. Bit light on the psychedelic urban prose poetry. Not enough football. Not enough bants. Not sorry. I want it all to be over as much as you. By the time you read this it probably will be. I'm going to get pissed either way. Wondering whether to get lunch here. Private enterprise steps in where the state now fears to tread. If Wetherspoons did community centres. They do. This is one. Just across from the Town Hall. Local government. Labour Councils heavily involved in social cleansing. It's not going to change overnight. Fucking hope it changes though. Lambeth. Southwark. Hackney. Etc. Blood on your hands. Difficult choices. I wouldn't want to make the choices. Still dealing with legacy of that fucking woman. Just old enough to remember being dragged out on marches. The impotence of the campaigning left. She fucking hated London as well. Not just the industrial north. Just there were more rich people here. Not as simple as that. I know. But it is. Bunch of people just walked in. Tories Out t-shirts. Time to start MI5 files on all of them. You fling around the numbers. What does terrorist sympathiser actually mean anyway? Invasive species. I'm an invasive species sympathiser. Parakeets. Grey squirrels. You name it. Love them. Kill them all. Badgers as well. Foxes too. The bloodlust never ends. Blood me. Soak me in it. Initiate me into your rituals. Occult forces at work. Deep Patriotism. I have legitimate concerns. Not ordered lunch yet. Still mulling it over. Lost in a sea of joyless opinion. Genuinely wonder if they've ever felt anything close to actual joy in their sad lives. Can't even watch a fucking pop concert, a moving, beautiful, attempt to help actual children come to terms with the horrific nature of the world around them and give them some hope, without spewing out their bile. Then they can't take it when people, rightly, call them cunts. I don't even want to put their names. FUCK THEM. ALL OF THEM. They love terror. They love death. Just like the people they claim to hate. We need hope. We need a new approach. The ways that weren't working before are still NOT WORKING. This is a chance to change. The first time I've ever felt a genuine choice. This is what is going to hurt so much. But for now. I wasn't a supporter. Still have reservations. But for now. One hundred. From zero. Real quick. Too much at stake. VOTE LABOUR ON THE RALPH SHIRT. Real policies. Boringly real policies. That would make a difference. I don't think that would have happened under someone else. I was up for getting rid. I was wrong. I WAS WRONG. Whatever the result. This fucking election. I truly want it to blow up in her face. Already has. Blown up in all our faces. Literally can't talk to anyone. Shit campaigner. Very easy to say if she still wins it's because of the current opposition but doesn't really stand up to any serious analysis. Doubtless that will be said though. I respect that. Just wish that the last two years had been years of unity. Both sides haven't covered themselves in glory. One side is definitely worse though. Internal machinations. Coups. Apparently though it's the fault of the people who voted him in. TWICE. I've moaned about him. Called him and his people incompetent. Weak. I apologise. The shit they've had to take. SORRY THIS IS FUCKING BORING. I'm fucking sick of it all. I want to be out in the outskirts. Routes through fields. Allotments. Edibles in my blood. Alternate realities. Intrigue. Fictions. Borges. J Hus in the headphones. Lib Dem boi paigon. I can't stand them. Fuck the other side. It's on sight now. Sites. Not on the maps. Blank spaces. Parapolitics. Back to the planet. Undercovers. Under the covers. Deep cover. Twins. Giving birth. The children of people who stole the identity of dead children. This is what they do. Professional. Give them more powers. Shoot to kill. I'm losing it. Losing the thread. Threads. Nuclear war. Discharge. Truth theories. NWO. Same old shit. SOS. SAS. Dipset. Diplomatic Immunity. Diplomacy. Foreign policy. Arms. Armshouse. Almshouses. Housing. Social Care. Healthcare. Dignity. Hope. Youth. Age. Hard borders. Troubles. Troubling. The past lives on. History is back again. A man just sat down. Says loudly: ANOTHER DAY IN THIS FUCKING SHITHOLE. Starts talking to the girls at the table next to him. They are talking fucking politics. They are all voting. Voting Labour. Do what they are doing.

ENTHUSIASTICALLY VOTE LABOUR. GRUDGINGLY VOTE LABOUR.

HOLD YOUR NOSE AND VOTE LABOUR. DESPAIRINGLY VOTE LABOUR.

TRIBALLY VOTE LABOUR. FOR THE FIRST TIME VOTE LABOUR.

DON'T VOTE FOR THEM LOT.

VOTE FOR OTHER PEOPLE WHO AREN'T THEM LOT IF IT KEEPS THEM LOT OUT.

VOTE FOR ME TO SHUT THE FUCK UP.