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inbloomwriting · 10 months

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If I had you II Jamie Tartt

Plot: Jamie Tartt is hard to love. At least he thinks so. Reader thinks it's the easiest thing in the world. Pairing: Jaime Tartt x female reader Warnings: Swearing, mentions of food and alcohol. Notes: This is inspired by the song "a daydream away". It's 5.2k words of pure friends-to-lovers sweetness. Likes, reblogs, comments are all much appreciated. I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please

Jamie Tartt is hard to love. At least he thinks so. It’s a chore to love him, the real him not the overly confident golden boy he portrays on the pitch. Just look at his track record, that just proves his point. Sure his mom loves him, he never questioned that, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for her. He’s convinced he’s made her cry more than once with yet another stupid decision. Then there’s his father who loves nothing more than to belittle him and lay out all his flaws for him and the world to see. And if even your own dad doesn’t love you, how can you expect others to.

So maybe that’s the reason he doesn’t let anyone close enough to even begin to love him. Sooner or later they’ll figure out how much of an effort it takes and that he, of all people, truly isn’t worth it.

And maybe, perhaps, that’s also the reason he doesn’t allow himself to explore the feelings he harbors for his best friend. He tried to deny them to himself for so long. Tried to pass it off as pure, unfiltered friendship. That’s bullshit though. He knows the feelings are there and there is no use in denying them. That doesn’t mean he can ever allow himself to act on them though. He’d just fuck it all up, the way he usually does with everything he touches.

The shiny hardwood floor feels cold and smooth as he sits leaning against the kitchen counter, legs stretched out before him. A smile is permanently etched onto his face as (Y/N) talks about something that happened at her work today. He should listen, it’s probably a fun story judging by the way her giggles make her stop talking every few seconds. He should listen but he is so enamored with her that he can not pay attention to anything else. In a perfect world, in a world where loving him was easy, he’d lean over and kiss her. He'd kiss her silly and she’d kiss him back and life would be sweet and it would make sense. In that perfect world, she would love him back the same way he loves her and it would be easy and he’d deserve her.

But that is not the world he’s living in. That is not his reality. Just a beautiful daydream he allows himself to escape to every once in a while. Loving her in a daydream is safe. It’s secret and quiet and there is no hurt there and no rejection.

“Why are you grinning like that, huh Tartt?”

She asks before taking a sip from the beer bottle clasped tightly in her hands. It’s an unusually hot summer’s day. One that makes it impossible to do anything but sit on the floor in as little clothing as possible and drink one cold drink after the other. Even if that means getting a little tipsy on a Tuesday afternoon.

“Nothing. Just happy to have you here. Missed you.”

“We didn’t see each other for a week and you already missed me?”

He misses her the minute she leaves. It’s like his heart isn’t complete if she isn’t there but he can’t really say that can he? Friends don’t tell friends things like that. And a friend is all she is. His best one but still. Telling her any of this could jeopardize their friendship and Jamie doesn’t think he could handle life without her. Not when a week already felt like torture.

“Well yeah, I’m proper shit at cooking. I need you to feed me.”

“Oh, is that so? Thought Mr. Bigshot footballer could get free food at any restaurant he fancies.”

She’s teasing but never mean and never hurtful. That’s something he cherishes so much about their friendship. His feelings, his fears — all of it is safe with her. There is no hurt or pain or fear. Just her and her friendship and warmth. And a pair of open arms ready to catch him whenever he stumbles and falls.

“True. But some fancy place in Mayfair will laugh at me if I ask them to make me dino nuggets, won’t they?”

Her laughter, he decides then, is his favorite sound in the world. It makes everything feel alright even if it’s just for a fleeting moment. He needs to keep his feelings locked up in that beautiful daydream because he can never lose this melody her laughter creates. And anyway, he wouldn’t even know what to do if he ever really had her.

— It’s not like she’d say yes anyway.

“You’re probably right about that,” she says and leans her head against his shoulder. And though it’s muggy and hot and he’s sure he can feel their skin stick together, he doesn’t shake her off. She’s part of his heart already, might as well melt into one completely. “You want me to make you some nuggets?”

“Nah,” Jamie replies and places a soft kiss on the top of her head. Friends kiss friends on the head all the time, everyone knows that. Right? "That's okay. Already had a Kebab with Roy earlier.”

“You guys are becoming friends then? Should I be worried I’m gonna lose my best friend status?”

Jamie lets out some mix between a chuckle and a scoff. As if anyone in all the world could ever replace her. What a ridiculous thought.

“Well he doesn’t make me nuggets, does he? No alphabet soup either. So no. Not yet.”

The little shake of her fist she does in victory makes him grin even bigger. He must look like a damn fool.

“I should probably get going sometime soon, I need to finish up some work and do laundry and do all that boring adult stuff that’s waiting for me at home.”

There are lots of things he should be doing instead of sitting on his kitchen floor on a Tuesday afternoon getting half drunk on cheap beer and half on his overwhelming love for her. He’s sure there are a bunch of texts and emails waiting for him to sort through. Keeley might be popping a blood vessel soon if he doesn’t answer her about that brand requesting to work with him on some ad campaign. And he will get back to her — soon.

Right now it doesn’t matter. Right now all that matters is him and (Y/N) and their little corner of safety and — home.

“But I don’t want to.”

“Yeah, me neither. Just want to sit here with you and — “

“ — hang out?”

“Mh. Hang out.”

That was not what he wanted to say but none of the words ghosting through his head are meant to be spoken out loud. They are his to feel and think and keep hidden and quiet.

“Good, we can hang out a little longer I think.”

And he’ll take what he can get. All the precious minutes she grants him he cherishes.

Right now could last forever and he wouldn’t mind at all.

Not as long as he’s with her.

Some early 00s pop song is blasting from the speakers of the bar. Everyone’s in good spirits and drinks are flowing freely.

(Y/N) is leaning against the bar talking to Colin, laughing about something he said, radiating joy and happiness.

She loves his friends, his boys, his family. Jamie loves that she loves them so dearly, so fiercely as if they are her own family. At this point, they might as well be. She remembers all their birthdays, drops by unannounced with cookies for everybody, cheers them on louder than anybody else. Hell, she even gets Roy to smile and that’s quite something. She’s as much a part of the AFC Richmond family as she is a part of his life.

“Jamie-Jam-Jam what are you sulking over here for,” her voice cuts through the crowd and the music as she slides into the booth next to him. She looks gorgeous in the hazy neon lights. Then again, she always looks gorgeous.

“Not sulking. Just — thinking.”

“About what?”

You. He’d say if he was honest and not such a coward. You and how much I adore you and how hard it is not to tell you any of this and fuck up our friendship.

“Was considering getting me nipples pierced. I’d have to take them out though and I imagine that would be quite annoying.”

“Probably,” she agrees and nods her head before adding “It would look sick though.”

“Right? I reckon it would.”

She laughs at that and once again it shakes his entire world. Like little earthquakes inside his heart.

Her voice is quieter after her laughter subsides, soft and gentle, and with the loud music it feels like her words are only meant for him. “I like this,” she says almost wistfully.

“The song? Who’s that, Rihanna?”

“Not the song, silly boy. This — “ she gestures around the room towards all their friends, dancing and laughing and having the time of their lives. And then she motions to the two of them, secluded and safe inside their own little bubble. “escaping our busy lives for a moment.”

“Lot of journalists would disagree with you there, love. That my life was busy.”

“They don’t know you like I know you.”

There’s a sincerity in her eyes, a warmth, something he can’t quite explain. It’s familiar and foreign all at once.

“No one knows me like you do. You had pity on Jamie Tartt, messy little prick from math class. They just know Jamie Tartt, the footballer from Richmond.Still a prick but now with better hair.”

Before he knows what’s happening, her hands take hold of his face and gently rest against his cheeks, forcing him to look at her. Really look at her.

“I never had pity on you, Jamie. I thought you were funny and exciting and infinitely cool. That’s why I wanted to be your friend. And I was right! About the funny part, not the cool part.”

“Obviously.”

“But I never took pity on you. I don’t think you realize how highly I think of you. Now let me get a sip of that drink.”

He’s still in some sort of haze brought on by her words when a groan coming from her shakes him from his thoughts. Her face is all scrunched up in disgust as she places his glass back on the table. “Ew, what the fuck is that?”

“I’m not sure, honestly. Barkeeper said she’d mix me a Jamie Tartt and I was like fuck yeah, a drink named after me.”

“It’s disgusting. Did you shag and dump her at some point? Like, is she mad at you for some reason?”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen that woman before in my life … so yeah maybe.”

Shaking her head with a smirk on her face she grabs a hold of his hand and pulls him out of the booth and towards the bar on the other side of the place, the one with the older male bartender with the impressive beard.

“You ever had a thing with him?” she asks as she leans against the counter, trying to get the man’s attention.

“Nah, I’d remember that facial hair.”

From then on the night tastes like tequila and beer and it feels like a warm hug. She doesn’t join in on all his drinks, stops herself after a beer and a shot, but she does join him in all the other shenanigans. Like when they make up ridiculous backstories for strangers and have a laugh about some corporate douchebag trying desperately to get with some woman who clearly has no interest in him.

“Henry from accounting.”

“Nah, that’s Charlie from HR.”

“Well, either way, Maisie from South Shields is not interested.”

He could stay here forever, laugh the night away. Drunk on happiness, on love — and also on quite a lot of booze.

“Come on, Jamie-Jam, “ she says and hands him his jacket. She’s all gentle hands and gentle eyes. “Let me give you a ride home.”

“We’re going home?”

“I think it’s time. Think someone had a little too much.”

“I’m sorry.”

He is but also not. He’s sorry for being a burden — again. He’s not sorry for letting himself enjoy a night of unadulterated happiness with the people that mean the most to him.

“No need to apologize, Jamie. I’m glad you had fun. Now come on, silly boy. I’m tired.”

And when they step out of the place and into the night, all sweaty and hair a mess, he thinks that of all the things his eyes have ever seen, the best by far is her. Then and always.

London passes by in a blur as (Y/N) drives them towards his house. All the bougie buildings and the iron fences and the trees in the parks, it’s all one kaleidoscope of color, a smudge of light and shadows.

It’s not like he can really focus on that though. Partly because all he can think of is her and partly because he’s absolutely wasted. Mostly her though. Definitely mostly her.

“Did you have a good time?” his voice slices through the comfortable silence.

“I always have a good time when I’m with you, silly boy. Did you?”

He rests his cheek against the smooth leather of her car seats and regards her with an infinite sense of wonder and adoration. In any other situation, this position would be deeply uncomfortable but he’s numb to anything but the beating of his heart and the strings that pull him towards his best friend.

“Obviously. Had my best girl with me. “

“Keeley?”

His eyebrows raise in confusion. “Keeley? No you numpty, you!”

“Me?”

“Why would you think I was talking about Keeley?”

He wishes he could see the look on her face. This is not a car conversation.

“Uh, she’s the only real adult relationship you ever had and you had a poster of her on your wall. Makes one think things. In fact, I believe that poster is still up.”

Jamie can’t help but scoff at her words. Not in a dismissive way necessarily but this whole conversation seems so silly to him. Yeah, he loved Keeley in a way and yeah she’s still one of his best friends but never has she come close to (Y/N). Keeley hardly ever got to see the real Jamie, the one that didn’t hide behind this larger-than-life footballer persona. (Y/N) met him before that persona even existed.

“Stop thinking things then. You’re my best girl, always.”

He still can’t see her face since she is looking at the road in front of them, but he can see the smile pulling the corner of her lips upwards, and for the moment that’s good enough for him.

Her car comes to a stop in front of Jamie's house but while he drags himself out of his seat, she stays put.

“What are you doing, love?”

“Dropping you off?”

“Are you not coming inside then?”

“Do you want me to come inside? We spent pretty much all week with each other, I thought you might be sick of me by now.”

A ridiculous thought if he’s ever heard one. He could never get sick of her. They could be glued to each other for the rest of eternity and he wouldn’t mind one bit.

Even in his drunk state of mind though, he realizes that’s not something he can tell her. That crosses out of friend territory. So he just chuckles and rolls his eyes.

“Do I want you to come in? What a dumb question is that? Of course, I do. I have a bag of those disgusting spicy crisps waiting for you in my kitchen.”

“In that case —”

10 minutes later they’re sitting on his couch, her legs across his lap, munching away at those god-awful crisps as some overly dramatic American home renovation show flickers across the TV screen.

In moments like these, love lives here. In these walls and on this couch. And it’s terrifying because thinking about love also makes him think of the possibility of losing it. But every once in a while, Jamie lets himself feel a tiny bit of it. Just enough to keep him going.

“Hey Jamie,” she speaks up, her face only illuminated by the light coming from the TV. She’s wearing his shirt and he wills himself not to focus too hard on that because that will cause images to ghosts through his mind that he can’t allow himself to ever think about. Images that cross every line ever drawn when it comes to friendships.

“Yes, love?”

“You’re my best boy too. Not sure I ever told you.”

He doesn’t answer, not in words at least. But he squeezes her legs as they rest on him, and he hopes she knows. Oh god if only she knew.

Jamie Tartt is hard to love. At least he thinks so. (Y/N) knows he thinks so because he let it slip once or twice when he was drunk and his words were all jumbled and his mind was all hazy.

And every damn time it breaks her fucking heart. Because loving Jamie Tartt is the easiest thing she ever did. It comes as natural as breathing. It feels like a nice ray of summer sun on her skin, sizzling and exciting and warm.

Loving Jamie is a gift.

Now if only there was a way she could make him realize that. But every time he lets himself be even a little vulnerable he is so quick to cover the cracks with stupid jokes or misplaced arrogance before a real conversation can happen.

She needs him to realize it though. To understand that loving him isn’t difficult. Because how can you tell someone you love them and make them understand just how much they mean to you when they deem themself unlovable?

Turning her head to the side she looks at his sleeping face. Somewhere between Fixer Upper and House Hunters, he fell asleep, leaving her alone with her thoughts. He’s snoring something awful but she still thinks he’s adorable. Jamie has a mischievous, lovable quality to him that just makes you open your heart to him whether you want to or not. Yeah, sure, he’s let people down, he’s done shitty things, but he’s trying. He’s learned and he’s changed and the price for being young and stupid and cocky should not be a life spent questioning if you deserve other people’s love.

Jamie Tartt is not hard to love. But loving him and not being able to tell him because he doesn’t love you in quite the same way, that’s just fucking cruel.

The air is loaded with static. Everyone is on the edge of their seat. (Y/N) is huddled in between Rebecca and Keeley, holding their hands and nervously biting at her lip. Emotions are running high as Richmond is playing Manchester. Correction — they’re not only playing them, they are kicking their asses.

It’s 2-0 for Richmond and they’re already 1 minute into the 3 minutes of additional time. If Manchester doesn’t get a miracle, Richmond wins. The thought of that makes a fluttery feeling spread in (Y/N)’s stomach. If this is how she feels, she can only imagine what Jamie must feel like.

1:30

2 minutes

2:30

3 minutes.

“Blow the whistle. Come on. Blow the fucking whistle.”

And as if he heard her pleading, the referee blows the whistle giving Richmond their win.

Laughter and cheers and songs fill the air as every Richmond fan is on their feet celebrating a win they so desperately wanted and that the team fought so hard for.

The win Jamie fought so hard for.

She tries to find him across the pitch but there are too many people, hugging and celebrating, too much noise. She just hopes he knows how proud she is.

And she hopes that somewhere out there his dad is watching. Sees him win, with the team he doesn’t approve of. Watches him succeed and be the man he never was and never will be.

She hopes somewhere deep in the inky black pit that is his heart, he finds a glimmer of pride for his only son, even if it comes entirely belated.

Jamie has won quite a few matches by now and it’s always a great feeling but some wins stand out. This is one of them.

His heart is filled with gratitude and pride, and his entire system is flooded with adrenaline and utter euphoria. He’s positively buzzing as the team gathers in the hallway leading toward the locker room. Some of them have been whisked away to give short post-match interviews — as if there is much to say other than how fucking awesome it feels to win — while the others are waiting for them to come back so they can all meet up at the locker room for some after match briefing.

“Superstar, you did it!”

Her voice carries through the hallway above the rest of all the noise. Like a siren calling out to him, she can’t hear anything but her, it all shifts into the background.

She weaves through the crowd like a fucking goddess in blue. He always thought she looked good in the Richmond colors and seeing her with his name on her back never fails to make his heart shutter with delight. But there’s something about today that makes this even more special.

Maybe it’s the adrenaline of winning. Of making his mom proud and proving his dad wrong. Of proving himself wrong. Maybe it’s seeing her in his kit, with his name and his number smiling that radiant smile of hers. Maybe it’s a combination of all these things. But something makes his brain short-circuit for a moment. Just a fleeting moment but long enough to make him push through the crowd until he’s standing in front of her, matching smiles on their faces. Just long enough for him to softly place one hand on her waist and pull her closer, so unbelievably close. Just long enough to cradle her face in his other hand, gentle and careful, like the most precious thing in the world. Long enough for him to place his lips on hers in a kiss so sweet, so long in the making, it feels surreal. It feels like he’s still stuck in his saccharine daydream.

And then reality snaps back and he pulls away, opening his eyes to a smiling (Y/N) staring back up at him through curious eyes.

“Silly boy, what was that?”

She doesn’t sound upset, in fact, his delusions might even make him think she sounds delighted.

“I — “

“Jamie, locker room. Let’s go, boy!”

Ted’s voice calls out to him all full of glee and jubilation. The guy sounds even more chipper than usual and that says a whole lot.

Pulling away from her feels like having a bubble suddenly popped. Every what-if that has been clouded by post-win euphoria suddenly bears their ugly head again. Sometimes Jamie wishes his thoughts weren’t so fucking loud all the time.

“Go, your coach is asking for you. I’ll see you at the after-party. We’ll talk then, yeah?”

Only they don’t because, for some inexplicable reason, Jamie avoids her like the plague.

Everyone is gathered at the bar for celebratory drinks, it’s a private function, just the team and family and associates. Spirits are high, everyone’s excited. And all things considered this night should be magical. Only it’s not, because once again Jamie refuses to let himself be loved.

Rejection tastes bitter. It’s sharp and metallic. Rejection also tastes quite a lot like tequila.

The salt, the lime, the liquor — it’s supposed to make her feel better. It’s supposed to mend the cracks in her heart, if only for a night.

It doesn’t do any of that, it only makes her fucking sad.

How foolish of her to believe that he’d feel the same, that he’d finally pick up on the hints she’s been dropping for over a decade and reciprocate the feelings. Maybe they never stood a chance anyway. Maybe —

No, actually fuck that.

He can’t do this, it’s unfair. You don’t kiss someone, not like that at least, and then ignore them for the rest of the night. Especially not when that person is your best fucking friend.

Bumping against people left and right, she makes her way across the room to stand next to a smiling Jamie deep in conversation with a pretty girl, who (Y/N) is quite sure is the sister of one of his teammates.

“I need to talk to you.” It’s not a request. Not this time. This conversation has been a long time coming. It’s time, she thinks, to finally be brave. One can only swallow down their feelings and emotions for so long, until they come bubbling to the surface like a fucking volcano rolling over Pompeii. She just hopes that once the dust settles there will be hope instead of death and destruction.

“Uh, kind of in the middle of something here.”

She can’t stand this part of him. This fake, unbothered cool guy who has no empathy for her or anyone other than himself. She hates it mostly because this is not the real Jamie, just some cardboard cutout version of him.

“Too bad, that'll have to wait.”

She doesn’t give him another second to resist or shake her off, just grabs onto his arm and pulls him through the crowd and towards the exit.

The nightly London air feels cold against her skin, making her shiver as goosebumps appear on her arms.

“What the fuck is going on with you?”

“What the fuck is going on with me?”

He can’t be serious.

“Yeah. I had something going there. She was well fit too.”

The urge to smack him across his stupidly handsome face is seriously fighting her desire to kiss him again right about now.

“Good for her but you owe me a conversation.”

“(Y/N), I — “

The way he rolls his eyes so dismissively, so suave and cool, it’s like a dagger straight to the heart.

“No, you know what — fuck you, Jamie. I know you have a hard time letting people in completely, and I get that that’s something you have to work through on your own time but the way you're treating me right now is really shit. You can’t kiss me like that and then run. I’ve been waiting for that fucking kiss for over a decade.”

“What?”

He looks at her with the signature Jamie Tartt look of confusion and innocence. Like a damn puppy or something. And if she wasn’t so annoyed, so hurt, maybe she’d find it endearing.

“I’m in love with you, Jamie. I’ve been in love with you since the day I met you. I’ve been in love with you since I was sat next to you in class and you asked me if Pythagoras was that French guy. I’ve loved you when you were just a chaotic teenager. I’ve loved you when you won your first game and when you lost. I’ve loved you when you signed your first contract and when you made a complete fool of yourself on that ridiculous tv show. And I love you now. So to think you finally picked up on it and reciprocate my feelings was — I was so happy, Jamie. Only for you to completely ignore me for the rest of the night. I don’t deserve that. Not from you of all people. “

“Will you let me talk?”

“No, I’m not done yet.”

“Alright, go on.”

“I love you, Jamie and I know you think I shouldn’t and that you don’t deserve it, but guess what? I don’t care. I love you anyway and I am not asking for permission to love you. That’s not how it works. And I don’t love you despite your flaws, I love them too. Even your stupid 2003 looking haircut and your ridiculous clothes that make you look like a male Bratz doll sometimes. Sorry people in your life made you feel like you had to earn it just because they couldn’t see how phenomenal you are. Just you, Jamie Tartt, messy little prick.”

Silence wraps around them like a thick blanket as a moment passes, then two. Jamie raises his eyebrows in question.

“Can I?”

“Yes, you can!”

“Jesus, alright. Stop yelling at me.”

“Well, I’m upset!”

“And I’m sorry about that. I never meant to upset you. Ever. I just — do you remember that one birthday, I think I turned 12, when me dad showed up and he was just being his usual asshole self and he made me play against him and then yelled at me in front of all the guests when he won? “

She sure does. Even at 12, she wanted to put her tiny little fist straight between Mr. Tartt’s eyebrows. “Yes.”

“You sat with me when I went to my room to escape. Refused to leave my side. Called my dad a wanker and you made me laugh. Then you got me a piece of cake and we ate it on my bed while watching Spongebob.” A smile plays on his lips as he reminisces about that day.

“I was 12 and I didn’t know a lot but I knew that night that I was in love with you and I immediately promised myself I wasn’t gonna do anything about it. Losing you is the scariest thing I can think about and my track record with people is pretty shit, honestly. So yeah I didn’t want to even risk fucking up with you. Rather have you as a friend than not have you at all.”

“So why did you kiss me earlier after all?”

“For one, you looked so fit in blue, with my name on your back. I was full of adrenaline and just so fucking happy. I uh — I think my mind was telling me that it’s finally time to be brave for once.”

Hearing him say it, it’s something she never expected but always hoped for. She’s played this scene out so many times in her dreams and yet she doesn’t know what to say or do now that it is actually happening.

“So what now?”

“Well, if you let me, I was gonna kiss you. Because if you think that other kiss was great, this next one is going to change your life.”

As those words fall from his lips, (Y/N) can’t get close to him quick enough. Pulling him towards her by the front of his shirt. Closer and closer until there is no room left between them and he gently nuzzles his nose against hers.

“Jamie Tartt?”

“Hmm?”

“Change my life!”

Jamie Tartt is hard to love. At least he thought so. And maybe a part of him still does and always will. But kissing (Y/N), his best girl, the fucking love of his life, it feels quite easy to let himself be loved.

Feels as easy as breathing. And for once in his life, the reality is so much sweeter than the daydream.

#jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt x y/n #jamie tartt x female reader #jamie tartt x f!reader #jamie tartt fanfiction #jamie tartt fanfic #jamie tartt imagine #jamie tartt imagines #jamie tartt oneshot #ted lasso tv show fanfiction #I dont know what else to tag this as my friends ....#inbloomwriting

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babeeangel · 11 months

Text

a toxic side of your relationship.

because every fairytale has its flaws ~

angsty short texts (<100w\character). Part 2 with more characters upcoming (you can comment for someone specific)

Isagi Yoichi, Reo Mikage, Itsohi Rin, Shidou Ryuusei, Itoshi Sae, Meguru Bachira, Otoya Eita, Michael Kaiser, Rensuke Kunigami.

[pt 2 includes: lorenzo, nagi, barou, yukimiya, karasu, ness] [pt3 includes: aiku, niko, hiori, chigiri, kurona]

Isagi coddles you too much. He feeds in your delusions, mostly by accident, because he apprehends the awkward moment where he breaks you from within. He keeps the harsh truth unbeknownst to you, he wrongfully thinks white lies are for the best. Sometimes reality hits anyways, and someone tells you with authenticity what's wrong with you. It hurts harder, because you’ve always had these extraneous walls protecting you.

Reo thinks materialistic love can make up for anything. He makes mistakes, just like everyone does, but he never really apologizes. He just sends you an impersonal gift, thinking it’ll make you forget.

He’s not always as present as you’d like him to be, but he defends himself saying he provides everything you could wish for. Except sometimes love cannot be touched.

Rin doesn’t realize he has an impact on you. He’s so focused on himself, he forgets his harsh words or dirty looks mean something to others. It’s like he forgets interactions go beyond time. He doesn't understand why get so caught up over something he did. “Why does he matters to you that much ?” He won’t accept that he is now part of someone else’s everyday life.

Shidou pushes your buttons on purpose. When you fight, he does and says exactly what he knows will make you out of your mind. He considers that the one that gets the loudest ‘lost’, so he will make it happen. That’s also his way of taking out his anger, making you the maddest possible. He will cross lines to make you sad or angry. He doesn't know where to stop, it's kinda immature.

Sae lowers your self-esteem with how better he is than you. You know that he surpasses you at everything, it’s almost ridiculous. Looks, intellect, strength, sociability. You’re just constantly reminded that everyone will love him better. His ego stops him from denying it or comforting you. Deep down, he likes feeling superior.

Bachira can be judgy. He has this look that makes you feel so stupid. When he doesn’t approve of something, you’ll just know. Because he thinks he has the singular right answer for everything. Sometimes you feel like you should not be entirely yourself, because he’ll have something to object to.

Kunigami is not the same in group settings as he is when alone with you. When he’s with his friends, it’s like he changes from a less thoughtful, caring person, to a sneery, detached individual. He probably doesn't do it on purpose, but it makes you feel so dumb and belittled.

Otoya is not as involved as you. He cares so little for your relationship, especially compared to you. He acts detached, is passive and sometimes even has the nerve to refuse plans you offer. If you didn’t do anything, your relationship would probably melt off instantly. It’s like he doesn't value your love to its true significance.

Kaiser gaslights you. He hates arguments and he hates being wrong. So if you even mention the possibility of him fucking up, he will completely turn it around to make you the bad guy. And if he does apologize, you know it comes with guilt tripping and unfulfilled promises. It’s like he cannot admit his mistakes, but on top of that, he blames it on you.

A\N: thought of this because i want my Isagi person who will always agree with me even when i'm wrong~ Unrealistic tho, ik

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distressedjellyfish · 3 months

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Things I think about with frequency

Amy March

How we deserved to see Amy and Laurie's wedding, and them falling in love, and just more of them

How Amy March is hated by many because LMA based the characters off her own sisters, and Amy was obviously written with some bias (as were all the sisters), which shines through and makes us feel similarly about Amy that "Jo" felt about her younger sister.

That line where Amy says "I've been second to Jo my whole life" hits A LOT harder when you realize that Louisa's (Jo) middle name is May, and her younger sister, who she based Amy off, is named May, after LMA's middle name.

I think that people see Amy as this vapid little bitch because she always knew she wanted to be a wife, and she knew she wanted to be rich. But what people fail to consider is that a lot of the time the youngest is the one that sees all the flaws in their family’s lives and feels responsible for taking care of them, even if its not expressly stated. Jo was a wild card. She was free to do as she wanted and nothing could stop her and God love Marmee for never trying. Meg was docile and almost polar opposite of Jo, and as the eldest sister she felt the same burden but lessened because yes she had typical Eldest Sister Syndrome where she had the need to take care of the family, but she also was the first, and therefore had no pre-set markers and expectations that she needed to meet or surpass. She wanted to marry and all that, but it didn't super matter about finances to her. Beth was unable to do "better" than her sisters "mistakes" flat out. And its not through any fault of her own, its just the way it was.

Speaking from experience, its always been clear to me that as the youngest of 3, I would have to do better. My half brother got a girl pregnant on his gap year when he was 18, so I was never allowed to take one, even though it would have probably helped in the long run. My half sister has always been mean to my parents, and won't let my dad see his only biological grandkid, which rips my dad apart, so of course I feel the pressure to have a child to give my dad a bio grandkid to dote on like he does with his non-bio grandkids, even though he's never outwardly expressed to anyone ever that he feels any disconnect from my niece because they aren't related, or that he wants me to have kids for any reason other than he wants them.

Anyways, my point is that Amy felt that pressure from a young age, hence always saying this or that about marrying rich. Add onto that when Aunt March tells her she's her family’s only hope of not being in the lower class/lower middle class for the rest of their lives. And just because that's the only time we see it, but that doesn't mean that there weren't other similar conversations had. Do you really think Aunt March never made her snide comments about the family and their status in front of Amy?

Amy's entire character revolves around this point, she's focused on being a proper lady, being delicate and pretty, in hopes of one day being able to bag someone rich, for her family.

Obviously, she falls into infatuation with Laurie when she meets him at the ripe age of 12??? She idolizes Jo, and Laurie is basically just the boy version (with some exceptions). He's also rich, young, handsome, and charming, and adores the family for who they are, including all their flaws. He's exactly what Amy had been saying she would marry, with the added bonus of him loving Jo the way she is, the exact opposite of Amy, proving that there are rich lovely men out there who will love you even if you aren't perfect, even if you falter. He's proof she can have the life she knows she needs to have for her family, and also still enjoy it and not be stressed all the time about being perfect.

Of course Laurie loves Jo first, for very similar reasons that Amy is infatuated with him. At 15, his whole life has been spent at dinner parties with girls the exact opposite of Jo, all proper and lovely and so so similar to one another, being told he'll marry one of them, everyone expecting him to be polished and well spoken and everything that no 15 year old boy wants to be. So then in comes this whirlwind girl who is completely different, a breath of fresh air that never wants to marry and can't ballroom dance for shit and laughs too loud, and shows him that life can be the Something Different he so desperately craves.

And of course, he ends up with Amy. He was Jo's best friend, so for 6 years all he knew of her was the way she was presented through Jo's eyes. A bratty little girl, who was the same as the other vapid girls he knew, that wasn't worth a thought. And he never paid her any mind because he spent 6 years thinking Jo loved him back, so why would he think of other girls? Then, at 21, he is essentially dumped by the love of his life, and travels abroad to find who he is without her. He meets Amy again, the girl who was always happy to see him. Of course he's going to spend time with her, she's familiar enough to feel like home, but different enough from Jo that it doesn't hurt. And there's the added validation of her liking him, which sometimes you need after your heart has been ripped apart. Plus, she's the only one he really knows in Paris. So they spend time together, and in that time he learns that she's not at all the way he's seen her over the last 6 years. Where he always saw someone not very bright, with a dim personality, that didn't stand up for anything or really rock the boat unless seriously provoked, who would do anything for him, he now finds a strong, funny, kind, beautiful girl, who is very intelligent and has a deep understanding of how cruel the world is (maybe ((definitely)) moreso than her sister) and knows how to manipulate said world in such a way that she can come out close to on top, who cares about her family enough to put everything else aside in order to become the person they need her to be in order to support them, who would still do anything for him but will absolutely call him on his shit and put him in his place when necessary. And how could he not love that?

She's not all that much like Jo, sure, but she is so much more. And she deserves so much more than people calling her his second choice.

Also I think that its criminal that most people don't see that obviously Jo loved her family but she loved herself more. Her sense of duty was to herself, and finding the place that would make her happy. She was also kind of a brat? Things didn't go her way? Editor is a dick? Boy critisizes her writing? Tantrum.

Whereas Amy loved her family more than herself. She was willing to put aside her dreams in order to support her family, and growing up was very rarely bitter about it. She decided, on her own, that her family was her number one priority, and that regardless of the fact that she could be happier doing other things, she wanted to do what she could to provide for her family. She knew how the world treated women, and she learned how to take that, and general criticism, on the chin.

Personally, I think that Amy is a way better character, and I'll die on this hill

Amy March

#jo march #amy march #beth march #meg march #louisa may alcott #little women #books #booklr #bookblr #classic literature #literature #movies #little women movie #little women 2019 #hot take #laurie laurence #amy x laurie #the march sisters #my roman empire

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tsukimefuku · 2 months

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✎ᝰ. jujutsu partners au masterlist

mdni | canon divergence | multigenre | nanami x reader x higuruma

cross posting: on ao3 here.

ᝰ summary: ten years after a mission gone bad in which gojo and nanami saved your life, you go — against your will — to work at jujutsu high as a sorcerer. you just never hoped this would elicit working alongside partners, and getting too close to them might turn out messy. this is a sequence of one-shots set in the same canon divergent alternate universe, in which Reader is a sorcerer with a considerably complicated relationship with Jujutsu High.

ᝰ important info: they're all written and posted in a non-linear fashion. To keep some organized way of reading them all, the fics are listed in chronological order. Writing in this is kind of experimental, so writing style might differ from one story to another.

ᝰ a/n: blue for Nanami focused stories | orange for Higuruma focused stories | both for both | stories with other characters have no particular color.

+ Disclaimers

- CONTAINS NSFW CONTENT. Do not proceed unless 18+! - Contains angst, fluff, and slow burn. - There will be more multi chapter short stories. - The one-shots are listed in chronological order. - I write flawed characters — and when I say flawed, I mean FLAWED. They can (and sometimes will) be idiots, assholes, mess up, make mistakes and make up. This is an important one, please don't ignore it. - I called this a love triangle for the sake of simplicity, but it's a V.

+ One-shots, short-stories and drabbles (in chronological order of events)

Stories below will be tagged as follows:

To be loved is to be changed (light/implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛😂 The day you arrived at Jujutsu High and encountered friends from the past.

These silly little memories (light/implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛😂 You reminisce about the past while chatting with Ijichi and Yuuji.

In my shoes (light/implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 💥💔💛 You get severely injured while on one of your first missions with Nanami.

Tea for your thoughts (light/implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛 Soft drabble where you receive tea waking up after a terrible night.

Valentine's Day and dark chocolate (light/implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛 You bought a box of chocolates you don't really like.

Would you let me die? (light/implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛💔💋 You and Nanami have a significant conversation, and you request something of him.

Driving lesson (Platonic Ijichi & OC/Reader) 💛😂 You asked Ijichi for some driving lessons.

Wardrobe malfunction (Light Nanami x OC/Reader) 😂 Your cursed technique isn't exactly clothing-friendly, and when you find yourself in a less than ideal situation, you only had one person you could ask for help.

Photo, motto! (Yuuji, Nobara and Megumi chaotic trio, light/implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 😂💛 Yuuji, Nobara and Megumi are shocked to learn you have no social media accounts, and decide to change that. However, things don't go as planned.

About witches and villages that hate sorcerers (light/implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 💔💥 What happens when your communication gets cut off during a mission in a village, and everyone knew you went there in the wrong state of mind?

Kikufuku picnic gratitude (Platonic Gojo x OC/Reader) 💛 Your friend Satoru Gojo just had some intense news and needs company.

The search for the man in the black suit (Higuruma & OC/Reader)💥 You were assigned to find and capture Higuruma Hiromi, a curse user sentenced to death by Jujutsu higher ups. You're just not sure if he really deserves to die.

Toxic endeavors (Higuruma & OC/Reader)💥💔 You and Higuruma are on your third mission together, and you save him from getting injured, putting yourself in harm's way as you do so.

Team fighting (light Higuruma x OC/Reader) 💛😂 You decided to train team fighting with Higuruma in an unorthodox way.

Short story: Right, wrong and the in-between (Nanami, OC/Reader, Higuruma) 💛💔💥 You and Higuruma were assigned to investigate the disappearance of women around Shinjuku. This led to a dicey situation regarding what place Jujutsu sorcerers occupy in this world and what is their role to play when non-sorcerers get involved. Chapters: Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Epilogue

Crooked gardening (light/implied Higuruma x OC/Reader) 💛 Higuruma keeps thinking about something you have done for him, and takes a walk to clear his mind.

Kindness and sunflowers (light/implied Higuruma x OC/Reader) 💛😂💋 You get a drunk Higuruma safely home.

Short story: Colleagues in arms 💥 Nanami and Higuruma are dispatched to exorcize a curse together, having to conciliate their personal issues in order to get the job done. Chapters: Single chapter

Where does your mind drift? (light Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛💔💋 After you and Nanami get stranded trying to get back to Tokyo, you both end up having a chat about your feelings.

PRIV FOR REWRITE - The event, Part 1 (explicit! Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛💋🌶️ You find yourself entangled with Nanami in his apartment, and worry where this might be going.

PRIV FOR REWRITE -The event, Part 2 (Nanami x OC/Reader) 💔💋 The aftermath of The Event, Part 1. Nanami needs to have a serious talk with you.

The man who played with fire (explicit! Higuruma x OC/Reader) 💛💋🌶️ After some drinks by yourself and getting frustrated with someone, you stupidly knock on Higuruma's door to test a theory.

The morning after is still last night (Higuruma x OC/Reader) 💛💋 After last night, you and Higuruma share a brief pillow talk.

What if (Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛💔💋 What if the world was more forgiving, and you and Nanami never became jujutsu sorcerers?

Short story: Lover's Pass (Nanami x OC/Reader) 💛💔💥💋 You and Nanami were sent to investigate cursed activity linked to disappearances in the Lover's Pass. Meanwhile, you both still have to deal with the fallout that happened after the last time you were together. Chapters: Single chapter

Bartender confessions (Nanami x OC/Reader) 💔 Nanami is trying to drink himself into oblivion to get his mind off of you.

Tactics (explicit! Higuruma x OC/Reader) 💛💋🌶️ You and Higuruma finally go on your first not-date when you decide to give him an answer.

Human resources, tasukete! (Gojo / Shoko / Ijichi. Fluff Higuruma x OC/Reader, just crack, honestly) 💛💔😂 You're concerned and decide to ask your friends about Jujutsu High's HR policies regarding romantic relationships.

It takes one to know one (Higuruma x OC/Reader) 💛💋 You and Higuruma decide to make a promise to each other.

Tie me up (explicit! Higuruma x OC/Reader) 😂💋🌶️ After failing to make a romantic dinner, you're very upset. Hiromi volunteers to “help you out” with that frustration.

Tea and coffee (Higuruma x OC/Reader, implied Nanami x OC/Reader) 💔💛😂 - You had a sleepless night and needs some caffeine to keep yourself from falling asleep before the day has even begun, so Nanami and Hiromi lend a helping hand.

Short story: Old regrets and guilt ridden pasts 💔💛💋🌶️ After you enter Hiromi's domain and he meets an acquaintance from the past, you both see yourselves confronting ancient ghosts and old regrets. Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 (10%)

Bread for breakfast (Higuruma x OC/Reader, implied past Nanami x OC/Reader) 💔 - Hiromi decides to walk down to a bakery he likes and have breakfast before heading to Morioka, and ends up bumping into Nanami.

Fixing broken things (implied/soft Nanami x OC/Reader) 💔💛 - After you realize that everything you were taking care of just wound up crooked anyway, you're pissed and needs a helping hand in order to not let the anger get the better of you.

Forgiveness is a collective resource (platonic Gojo & OC/Reader) 💔💛 - As you're telling Gojo about your most recent fallout, he ends up telling you in return the last question Geto posed him before leaving.

The letter (coming soon…) 0%

Bar discoveries (coming soon…) 0%

No more patience behind the wheels (coming soon...) 100%

Unwell (coming soon...) 10%

Books and dinner (coming soon…) 40%

Eulogy for the love remained (coming soon...) 30%

How do you say it? (soon) 0%

In-office nap time (soon) 0%

Something’s off (soon) 0%

+ About and P.A.Q. (Possibly Asked Questions)

Q: How did this come to be? This came into my mind as I was thinking about my Jujutsu Kaisen Original Character, Shiori Yamada. She is from my JJK Canon Compliant fanfic, Sand and Snow. I thought: what if she came to Jujutsu High years after the events of Sand and Snow? And that's where it started.

Q: What's the difference between the short stories and the one-shots? Mostly, I usually have a long or dedicated main plot in my short stories, whereas in the one-shots, what is written is much more focused on an excerpt of the characters' interactions.

Q: what is the best way to read this? I wrote it in a way that basically all one-shots can be read as stand-alone pieces (same for each short story). Just read in the chronological order of events, as listed above.

Q: is it the same f!reader in all of these stories? Yes, it is The reader is based off of my Original Character, Shiori. I didn’t intend to make her a staple, but just liked the character too much to let it slide. I’ll eventually make a reference sheet with her story (as soon as I finish Sand and Snow, to avoid spoilers).

+ Relevant updates + Notes

other updates can be checked on the reblog section

Playlist (a.k.a. stuff I listen to when writing these): ♪ Want me too - Mons Vi / ♪ Heart's a Mess - Gotye / ♪ It's gonna rain - Bonnie Pink / ♪ I love you so - The Walters / ♪ Ichigo Batake de Tsukamaete - Sunny Day Service / ♪ Setsuna - Sunny Day Service / ♪ For Emma - Bon Iver / ♪ Break - alex_g_offline / ♪ My love, mine all mine - Mitski / ♪ Babooshka - Kate Bush / ♪ One last kiss - Hikaru Utada / ♪ Tactics - The Yellow Monkey / ♪ Mr. Deja Vu - Naja / ♪ Stuck on the puzzle - Arctic Monkeys / ♪ We’re all eating each other - Julie Ivy / ♪ Head Over Feet - Alanis Morissette (HiguReader specific) / ♪ Nothing in my way - Keane (NanaReader specific) / ♪ I bet on losing dogs - Mitski / ♪ Chamber of reflection - Your Anxiety Buddy (cover) / ♪ Sunny - Yorushika / ♪ Sayonara Bye Bye - Matsuko Mawatari / ♪ Misery - Maroon 5 / ♪ First love/Late spring - Mitski / ♪ Heart skipped a beat - The XX

ׂ╰┈➤ You can listen to the full playlist here (on YouTube).

Update + Mar 26, 2024

I just decided to list all one-shots and short-stories together. Seemed more simple and efficient.

Update + Mar. 23, 2024

There are some things I want to put here because as an anxious writer, I like when other writers do this.

1. this is my COPIUM from the trauma I have endured during JJK (thanks Gege), so no matter what, THERE WILL BE A HAPPY ENDING for all characters. I just like the bumpy road, makes the happiness at the end feel worthwhile.

2. I decided to one-shot the ending. However, the long fic based off of this universe will probably have a slightly different and bigger one. There are many things (protagonist’s power journey, lore, her backstory, actual big plot that I have planned, etc) that I really want to write on the long fic, and didn’t find a way of doing so in these one-shots and short stories.

3. I don’t know if you’ve seen it, but I began cross posting these on AO3. The link is on the top.

4. The Big Sad™ and The Big Feels™ are about to get started. I’ll just finish up some one-shots first and then proceed with them. There will be angst, but a lot of fluff too.

Commentary

Random thoughts and fun facts from the author that absolutely no one asked for but I wanted to write anyway

Themes are... guilt, forgiveness, grief, and life after loss, I guess? Idk, I like writing characters interacting and growing with each other, so I just give them their trauma and let them work through it.

I first got inspired to write HiguReader when I listened to “Loser, Baby” from Hazbin Hotel. They’re both so over Jujutsu High’s shit and vibe on that shared contempt that I just loved the concept of it.

One of my favorite things to do is getting traits from a character and twisting them to be a double edged knife - a quality and a flaw at the same time. Basically, that’s what I did with Nanami’s protective persona, and intend to do (as of writing this on march 24th) with Higuruma’s sense of justice and responsibility.

I was terrified writing my first smut piece (The Man who Played with Fire), and I’m astonished at how well it was received. You guys are the best, seriously.

Nanami’s suffering will end soon (I say as of writing this, march 24th).

I got inspired by some very talented authors on this site to write non-explicit sex scenes, and will try doing it in two or three one-shots, where there is sex involved, but I don’t think smut would fit very well.

Writing smut as a demisexual person is an entire experience, let’s just say that.

From the very beginning, I just found it impossible in my heart to ship or even hint at shipping OC/Reader and Gojo. Also, as a NM person who doesn’t appreciate rigid hierarchy of romantic x platonic relationships, I wanted to write more on becoming friends with Gojo. However, from what I could see when writing these fics and shorts, this will end up mostly in the long fic.

I STRUGGLE with headers so damn much. I don’t like using fanart (shy to ask for permission), and finding good fitting anime frames/manga panels is usually a little difficult without becoming too repetitive. I’ll just try my best making headers for the AU stories moving forward.

I like writing strong, capable, willful female characters who are secure of themselves and have got some rizz iykwim. Dainty female characters are really not my thing when it comes to writing. I’ll eventually try writing more delicate or heart-warming female leads/readers, though, because we should strive to get out of our comfort zone.

Writing in 2nd person is still a challenge for me. I was used to writing in 1st person in a Lispectoresque style when I wrote ten years ago (also, I did it in my native language). “The Letter” will be (or “was”, depending on when you’re reading this) my attempt at transporting my original style of writing into English and reader insert.

#jujutsu kaisen higuruma #higuruma x reader #jjk higuruma #jjk hiromi #hiromi x reader #higuruma hiromi #jjk imagines #jjk drabbles #jjk x you #jjk #jujutsu nanami #nanami kento #jjk nanami #jjk fanfic #nanami x reader #nanami x you #jujutsu kaisen #fuku writes

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selene-19 · 4 months

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Katsuki Bakugo and Katsuki Gogo

Reminder that Katsuki is originally supposed to be a nice, cheery person and best friend with Izuku but Horikoshi HATES IT! I did think about it and I understand why Bakugo Katsuki is the best choice than Gogo Katsuki

Gogo Katsuki has it all a strong quirk, good looks, a natural genius and have a nice personality. He sounds lovable, right? He would be like:

Izuku: Kacchan you are amazing!

Katsuki: you are amazing too Izuku! I bet you could do it too.

If this is their relationship I wouldn't ship them. Why? Cause I would rather ship Izuocha because it has the same energy. Sunshine x Sunshine ☀️

Izuku with this Katsuki is not good on my opinion. Izuku is self sacrificial, so selfless and with this Katsuki who I bet would just encourage him. He would be the Deku who does his best and Gogo would just be happy for him like a good best friend 🙃

Unlike Katsuki Bakugo who knows Izuku's self-sacrificial and hate it. I'm saying this without shipping glasses but Katsuki Bakugo is perfect as he is imperfect. He has flaws, mistakes, weaknesses, and insecurities and Gogo doesn't have actual flaws except being an airhead. Gogo didn't need to have that character growth and development. I mean Gogo Katsuki could have grown to be a hero and I think that would only be his development and doesn't need to be with Izuku for that.

This video after Kacchan vs Deku 2 shows how Bakugo Katsuki makes Izuku strive to be a better hero, them being rivals. He wanted to catch up with Katsuki and vice versa. Izuku admires Katsuki's strength and Katsuki fears Izuku's heart, they are twin stars, like yin and yang and of course as All Might said "Win to Save, Save to Win". You can see All Might proud smile while looking at them.

Now, this sketch of Hori which is one of my fave shows how Izuku keeps chasing after Katsuki and wants to be the best hero with him. Look how he ran so hard with all of his might. He wants to catch up with Katsuki so bad, wants to be closer which he achieves eventually. Even with the bullying it never stops Izuku from dreaming of becoming a hero. I also like to add that Katsuki also chases after Izuku because both of them think one is ahead of the other shown in chp 362.

Let's go back to Gogo Katsuki. Gogo is a genius so obviously he is talented and good with everything and definitely supportive. So Izuku being quirkless is not an issue to Gogo cause he is nice so I think he would say that Izuku can still be a hero. And Izuku would be happy with that. He wouldn't push himself so hard or might push himself but either way, Gogo said he would be a hero and Izuku would believe it. Izuku doesn't need to do his very best to chase Katsuki cause he has his acceptance already so end of story 😟

There would be no "I keep chasing after you and What would Kacchan do" then no romantic rain, no heart issue, Katsuki apology would never happen, not Katsuki being Izuku's hero or vice versa, no Katsuki being sacrifice or him dying for Izuku cause why would he do that when he trust Izuku could do anything. They just don't bring the best out of each other. And we would never have Izuku looking at Katsuki with awe and wanted to be closer cause they are already close. They'll just be childhood friends and classmates. MHA would never be the same.

Just looking at this it pisses me off. I understand Horikoshi why it angers him. Katsuki has an explosion quirk and should have an explosive personality but Gogo is just a burst of sunshine and just perfect 😂

credits to the editor 💖

With Gogo Katsuki I don't think Izuku would see him as his image of victory (why would he when Katsuki G is nice and won't fight and I bet is friendly with everyone) but rather a supportive best friend, I can see them being rivals, has a friendly rivalry like Asta and Yuno. So I would never ship them and I would agree with people saying they are like brothers.

Katsuki Bakugo is a complex character and I love him for that. Katsuki Gogo would be a good character but he would never achieve as much popularity as Katsuki Bakugo who is always number one on popularity polls. Horikoshi is amazing on writing Katsuki Bakugo's character and personality. Also, Gogo Katsuki should be with prototype Izuku or Yamikumo cause they have contrast in their personality so they are good with each other, unlike Gogo and Izuku.

Lastly, I love Katsuki being a tsundere and I would never appreciate his genuine smile if he was Gogo who is a cheery person that always smiling 🥹

As I end this I would like to add, we won't have our Izuku Midoriya we know today without Katsuki Bakugo. They are who they are right now because of each other and their experiences 🧡💚

Found this on pinterest, credits to the artist

#why did I write these #its because I'm tired of the Katsuki slander #bakudeku #bkdk #dekukatsu #katsudeku #decchan #katsuki bakugō #dekubaku #dkbk #katsuki x deku #deku x kacchan #bakugou x deku #bkdk canon

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ot3 · 3 months

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I mean this in entirely good faith, I promise, but I'd love to hear the "shortcomings" you think those shows have

she ra i mostly just found boring i don't think i could point to a single thing it did (out of what i watched, that is. i didn't finish the show) that i found to be an objectionable writing choice, but it just didn't do anything to keep my interest. which is a shame because i went into it REALLY excited!!! i had long been a fan of nimona so hearing that ND stevenson was getting the chance to make a cartoon i was SO prepared to be all over it. and i watched it and it all just fell pretty flat for me

steven universe and the owl house i feel like are shows with some pretty major structural issues. i really think they try to have their cake and eat it in terms of episodic moments vs overarching series narratives that are kind of at odds with each other.

with steven universe i feel like this manifested in some pretty bizarre tonal whiplash that prevented either of the shows angles from sticking its landing. i think if steven universe had either been an epic space opera about a kid inheriting his mother's war, it would have fucking banged. i think if steven universe had been a more slice-of-life oriented show about a boy coming of age by realizing he's sort of the living manifestation of the war trauma of the people around him and learning to navigate and help people heal from that through fantastical, alien super-powered twists on mundane life that would have banged in a completely different way. but as it stands i think trying to do both at the same time detracted from the overall experience.

it feels weird to have them fucking around at the barn when there is something that is going to literally hatch from the earth's crust like an egg and destroy the entire planet and theyre just ignoring it. it feels weird in a different way to have them visit an alien zoo full of human beings and know that the structure of the show means we will absolutely not be taking the time to fully unpack that one. for me this cognitive dissonance really reached its peak an episode where steven explicitly calls his mother a war criminal, but that was a throwaway line because the A plot was that lars, the guy who works at the donut shop, bakes as a hobby and is embarrassed by that. to be perfectly clear i don't think it's impossible to balance more mundane slice of life moments with big adventures to combat existential threats. but whatever that balance looks like is not what steven universe was doing

the owl house on the other hand i don't feel like was ever really willing to commit to a particular vibe long enough to get invested in it. it's trying to be a show about a girl who is a witch's apprentice, but that doesn't really feel quite fully realized because it's also trying to be a show about a Magic School, but we don't spend enough time at the Magic School to get invested in that setting as a framework for the character interactions and narrative events, but then it also starts trying to be this big adventure/questing show. and then before too long luz is the one teaching magic to everyone else? it refuses to really commit to any one thing it's trying and just kind of throws everything at you with out actually getting to spend time with its concepts

in general i also think luz was a weak protagonist. in terms of writing. i think she wasnt given enough meaningful flaws, didn't make enough mistakes, and didn't really have to learn any hard lessons or make decisions that fundamentally went against who she thought she was. her whole thing is basically being Nerdy and Kinda Weird which i think is kind of an outdated substitute for meaningful character writing in the current zeitgeist. im sure she is an absolutely fantastic power fantasy for a lot of 12 year old girls who consider reading books to be their main personality trait and i absolutely do not fault that for existing. i think that's a critical thing to exist and all those 12 year olds really deserve it. but it has no appeal to me as an adult woman who has grown out of that phase, yknow?

i feel like once again the comparison to akko from little witch academia invites itself very easily, and anne from amphibia too, which was also a disney teen girl isekai airing at the same time. i loved both of those two as protags a ton and i think its because they really fumbled repeatedly and went through the wringer in a way luz didn't

#long post

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milaisreading · 5 months

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🌱🩷: So, this is the first story of my Blue Lock Christmas special stories. I hope u all will like them! Thanks for reading🩷

Pairing: Otoya Eita x Isagi's sister!Yn

(Slight mention of Oliver Aiku x Isagi's sis!Yn)

Warnings: Reader uses she/her. No other warnings, really... there might be a little bit of angst, but that's abt it. It has a fluff ending

⚽️Blue Lock belongs to Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️

🎄Dec 10th🎄

It's the Christmas time right after the Japan team had won the World Cup. Otoya still felt the same amount of euphoria he felt months ago. He had made great new friends, got an offer to play in a good European football club, got many sponsorships, and, for Otoya most importantly, he got a lot of attention from the ladies. He always liked the attention they gave him, but never found it in himself to date one of the girls who confessed to him. Otoya wanted to blame that on the fact that he knew he wasn't relationship material, that he liked fucking around, and that he didn't want to make the same mistake he did prior to joining Blue Lock. But... Otoya knew that wasn't entirely true. He had eyes on someone else. He had feelings for someone else, and kept on silently admiring them from afar as they were happily in a relationship with someone else. And that someone was nobody other than Isagi (Y/n), their star striker's older sister. Otoya isn't someone who falls in love hard, but ever since he got to know the older Isagi he doesn't believe it. Otoya really loved the girl, and he wasn't sure what he loved more about her. Was it the laugh? The smile? The kind personality? The angry look she would send Isagi when he didn't pick his stuff up? Or maybe it was how relaxed she was? Or all of it combined? Otoya didn't know the answer, but one thing he did know is that he fell in love, and he wasn't getting out of it any time soon.

But, just like (Y/n) is perfect is Otoya's eyes, there was one imperfection about the girl that was bugging him. Well, it's not a flaw in her personality or looks, but more her partner. The one and only, Oliver Aiku, the former captain of the U-20 team and Japan's most well known two-timer. Otoya will admit it was hypocritical of him to hate Oliver for cheating, but he didn't care!

Thanks to his closeness with Isagi, Otoya got to know of all the times Oliver cheated on (Y/n), and every time she took him back! The green-eyed boy couldn't believe that, he didn't want to believe it, but... it was true. And in a way Otoya understood it, when you love someone you don't think clearly, but it didn't mean he liked it. He still remembers the day she came back home, crying while Otoya was visiting Isagi.

🎄Flashback🎄

It was the Christmas day of last year, and after a whole day of spending time with his family, he decided to visit his good friend Isagi (he hoped his sister was home, too). The blue-eyed boy didn't protest the idea much, since he was alone at home and just playing video games, while his parents went to a party and his sister went out on a date with Oliver.

"Soo... they are still dating?" Otoya asked, trying to keep his attention on the video game. Isagi sighed and did the same, not noticing or ignoring the obvious venom in Otoya's voice.

"Yeah... mom and I tried to tell her so many times to leave his pathetic ass, but she just won't. I understand she is in love with Aiku, but that doesn't mean she has to suffer like this." Isagi answered back as they waited for a new level to load. Otoya kept quiet, his grip on the controller tightening as he thought of Oliver.

'That idiot has such a sweet and caring person on his side...'

"How... how many times has it happened?" Otoya questioned.

"Hmm... Sis told me he cheated like 2 times... as far as she knows."

"Hm." Otoya's brows furrowed.

The entrance door suddenly slammed open, startling the duo and Isagi paused the game to see who it was.

"Hm?" Isagi mumbled as he walked towards the entrance. Otoya watched silently, wondering who it could be.

"Sis... it happened again?" The green-eyed boy stood up as he heard Isagi's words, his heart thumbing against his ribcage as he listened in on them.

"Y-yes... but it's fine... I was planning on breaking up today, anyways." (Y/n) sobbed out and Otoya peeked from the open entrance, only to find the girl being hugged by her brother while she was crying.

"I am so stupid."She cried out again and Otoya returned back into the living room before the siblings saw him.

'That stupid asshole...' The green-eyed boy clenched his fists as he listened in on the duo.

🎄Present time🎄

After that day, Otoya made sure to be more attentive towards (Y/n), and was more responsible with his flirting. In hindsight, Otoya should have been this way while (Y/n) and Oliver were still dating, but the flirting made Oliver mad and (Y/n) didn't seem to mind much, since he was never really inappropriate or anything. So, Otoya saw it as a win. But ever since the break up, he just couldn't bring himself to be the old Otoya in that sense. So he would just do some basic things. If he visited Isagi, he would bring some food for them and (Y/n), if she needed help with groceries, he would be there (Isagi was forced to tell him, since Otoya wouldn't stop pestering him), if she said she liked some new book, he would look for it and read. He was down that bad... The whole time he just wanted her to see he was reliable and could be there for her. Something Oliver wasn't.

Otoya sighed as he found the last item in the grocery store his mom sent him to. Memories of the final at the World Cup playing in his head.

🎄Flashback🎄

Otoya looked over at the VIP section from time to time while the team was warming-up for their match against Germany. Otoya could feel the adrenaline rush hitting him 10x harder than it usually would. Not only was this the match everyone was fighting tooth and nail to get to, but also (Y/n) was there and watching him. She was sitting with her parents and waving at the guys from time to time.

'I wish she wore my jersey instead...' Otoya thought as he noted the number 11 written on the particular shirt she wore.

"Otoya, are you alright?"

Speaking of the devil, the younger Isagi walked up to the green-eyed boy, causing him to look at the blue-eyed boy.

"Fine. I am just thinking."

"About my sis?" Isagi raised an eyebrow, watching Otoya blush a little.

"Am I that obvious?"

"Yes. It is amusing to watch." Isagi snickered as Otoya sent him a side-glare, but it quickly disappeared.

"Say... does your sister ever talk about me?" Isagi stopped laughing and looked at Otoya again.

"Well, she said you are very caring and funny to hang out with." The younger answered as be watched Otoya blush again, then continued speaking.

"You know, if you like my sister... try it. (Y/n) seems to like you a lot."

"R-really?" Otoya stuttered, frantically looking between him and (Y/n).

"Yeah. Just...just don't hurt her."

"Of course I won't! I... She means a lot to me." Otoya sighed and looked back at her, just in time for their eyes to meet. The boy blushed as (Y/n) waved at him and he waved back.

'I will ask her out if we win this final game. I promise.'

🎄Present Time🎄

'I still didn't do it... I should probably confess before I leave for Spain in 2 months.' Otoya thought as he made his way back home. The boy fished out his phone and looked at the time, then at the date.

'December 23rd...'

An idea popped in his head then.

🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️🎄☃️

December 24th

Shibuya ward, Tokyo

"Otoya! Sorry if I am late!" The boy looked away from the night sky and excitedly watched as (Y/n) approached him.

"So-sorry! My ride was late. Did you wait for too long?" She asked, stopping in front of him while clutching the strap of her bag.

'Cute... she looks cute!' Otoya blushed and shook his head as he was observing her.

"Not at all... I am happy you made it here. You look good today..." The boy mumbled nervously, causing the girl to blush a little.

"Thanks, although it's nothing special. Y-you look nice, too." She stuttered the last part, at Otoya felt like his brain went blank for a moment, but he ended up shaking himself out of that state.

"Thank you for agreeing to meet up with me today. Especially when everything is so busy and crowded now. I... uhm..." Otoya felt like his heart was about to explode.

'Come on! You confessed to girls before!'

"It's nothing worth thanking me for! I really like hanging out with you!" She smiled again.

'But... with (Y/n) it's different. I really need to be smooth with it.' He took a deep breath.

"I like you! More than just a friend." Otoya said, blushing a bright red.

'Otoya Eita, you idiot!' He wanted to facepalm himself as he watched (Y/n)'s eyes widen in shock.

"I... I am sorry it came out like this, but I really meant what I said. I liked you for a while and... and wanted to say this before I leave for Spain. I..." Otoya took a deep breath as his heart broke a little by what he said next.

"I cam understand if you don't feel the same. I just hope we can still stay friends."

(Y/n) kept quiet as Otoya spoke, the boy growing more and more nervous.

'I should have kept my mouth shut-'

"I... I like you, too." She said, face flushed while trying to look directly at Otoya.

"I did for months now... and I wanted to confess weeks ago, but after I heard you will be leaving Japan soon..." (Y/n) took a deep breath. Now it was Otoya's turn to look shocked.

"I didn't want to make the little bit of time we have left awkward. I wasn't sure if you liked me."

The duo kept quiet after that for a minute, both equally excited and flushed.

"I am happy... you liking me back really makes me happy." Otoya said as a soft smile made its way on his face, moving closer to (Y/n).

"So... does that mean we are a... a couple now?" She wondered, moving closer as well.

"Of course. I... I might suck at expressing myself properly, but you mean a lot to me, and I promise to cherish you."

"Even... even when we are far apart? You won't leave me?"

"Never. I will make sure to contact you as much as possible. I would never dream of leaving you."

Otoya gently grabbed her face and the two shared a short and sweet kiss.

"To think that last Christmas I was a crying mess... a year sure makes a big difference." She laughed little as Otoya pulled her into a hug. The boy smiling from ear to ear as he felt her hug him back.

"I swear that every Christmas from mow on will be even better than the previous ones. I love you."

"Love you,too, Otoya." She sighed in bliss, hugging him tightly.

#bllk #blue lock anime #blue lock manga #blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #blue lock scenarios #isagi's sister #otoya eita #blue lock otoya #bllk otoya #otoya eita x reader #otoya eita x you #otoya x reader #fluff #angst

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comradekatara · 10 months

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there's a post going around about how katara is misunderstood by fans who claim that she "whines too much about her mother" and "unfairly friendzoned aang" and how people who say that are doing a disservice to such a great character. and obviously i agree. even though i've never actually seen anyone say those things firsthand, i'm positive that they do, and it is a gross misinterpretation of her character. i'm glad people are defending her from slander. but i also can't help but feel disappointed by that post, because in an attempt to defend her from bogus allegations, they end up actually reducing her themselves. and that makes me so sad, because katara would not actually be as special and wonderful as she is without her flaws. of course, her response to aang's affection and the way she brings up her mother are not flaws, but she does have them. they're what make her such a good character! putting her on a pedestal is just as reductive as calling her whiny or whatever.

Or you hear the infamous line, “then you didn’t love [our mother] the way I did” and you prepare yourself for one of the worst character assassinations ever only to see the scene after nearly three seasons worth of context and realize she was kinda right. She’s been the mother, the nurturer, the comforter. She’s been patient, gentle, and accommodating where everyone else has gotten to be insensible and reckless and childish, and the one moment where she allows herself to feel her grief, suddenly she’s this evil bitch and not, y’know, a 14 year old girl whose (sic) been thrusted into adulthood in a way no other character has. A 14 year old girl who should be allowed immaturity and raw emotion and anger instead of the patience and grace she’s been forced to extend to every character without even the smallest amount of gratitude or even consideration in return.

okay so the thing is... i do think katara is kinda right when she says this line. it's cruel, but it's not exactly wrong. katara has placed so much of her identity into kya's sacrifice. perhaps sokka and katara loved their mother equally, but they did not grieve her equally, they did not feel the same loss. kya's death was personal to katara in a way it was not to sokka, and in that moment, when she says that, it's upsetting, but understandable.

that said, katara gets to be insensible, reckless, and childish constantly. it's a cornerstone of her character. that doesn't mean that she isn't often reasonable, practical, sensitive, and comforting, but that's not all she is. she's a kid and she acts like it! her immaturity, raw emotion, and anger are some of her defining characteristics. we see those wonderful traits of hers as early as the pilot, and they never go away. so i'm confused by the claim that she is denied that. she just simply isn't.

she's also not the only one who is thrust into adulthood. even if you ignore azula, since she's a villain, we literally see hakoda say to sokka multiple times that he left sokka behind to care for and protect katara and their village. and sokka takes that very seriously. he and kanna face down katara and aang in episode one chastising katara for being irresponsible enough to accidentally send a flare that locates the fire nation to their village. sokka tells katara that she put them in danger and kanna says "sokka is right." katara tells sokka that he's making a mistake, but he says, "no, i'm keeping my promise to dad. to protect you." sokka's mentality is one of protecting katara, of being responsible for her, for his village, and then aang, and later toph. he was thrust into adulthood at 13 when he was "the only man" left in the tribe. i don't understand how anyone could see that and say that katara was the only one forced to grow up too fast. she was forced to grow up too fast, and it's tragic, but she also clings to her innocence and childhood, and that's an integral aspect of her character. why would you erase that?

Katara is the most misunderstood character in the show. As much as people recognize the complexities of Zuko, Sokka, and Azula, they struggle to do the same for Katara because they see her struggles as somehow lesser, and therefore, less deserving of sympathy. They can handle her so long as she’s being endlessly patient and loving and kind, but the moment her endless love, patience, and kindness runs out, she’s suddenly this annoying bitch who can’t shut up about her mother or reciprocate Aang’s feelings. But Katara’s trauma does matter as much as anyone else’s. No, she wasn’t banished from her kingdom. No, she didn’t lose her entire community, and no, she isn’t the only one who lost her mother. But the difference between her and everyone else whose experienced loss because of the Fire Nation is that she’s never given time to process her trauma. Aang gets to lean on Katara constantly. Toph gets to express her feelings to Katara, and yeah, Sokka also lost their mother, but unlike Katara, he isn’t put in the position of being a substitute for everyone’s parent. He even admits that he sees his sister as a mother. The only characters who ever comfort Katara or allow her to vent is Zuko and her father and that’s, like, three scenes in a show where the other characters are consistently given opportunities to seek out Katara for unconditional support.

lmao i don't really think people understand the complexities of azula and sokka. zuko, yes, definitely, much ink has been spilled on zuko's strife. but if you know where to look, people write about katara as much as they write about azula and sokka, which is to say, not as much as they do zuko, but nonetheless a fair amount.

she is given time to process her trauma, though. she talks about her trauma constantly. not in a whiny way, but in the sense that her grief defines her in many ways, and since she is the main character, arguably on equal standing with aang, her trauma is explored a lot throughout the show. she certainly discusses it with more than simply zuko (who immediately goes on to betray her). she does have that beautiful scene with hakoda, but she also talks about her trauma to aang, jet, haru, hama, and of course sokka. she never talks about it directly with toph, but sokka talks about her to toph.

the idea that aang and sokka cannot empathize with her grief is actually pretty absurd. aang knows what it's like to be the chosen one, to be the last of your people and expected to carry the weight of your entire culture on your back. sokka knows what it's like to lose their parents (they lost. the same parents) and be expected to replace that parent and bear their legacy (even if with sokka he is attempting to replace hakoda while katara is attempting to replace kya). and just because zuko is the only one who bears the guilt of knowing that his mother sacrificed herself for him in the same way that kya sacrificed herself for katara, doesn't mean that aang and sokka are completely blind to her grief. they do want to help and support her. helping and supporting katara is sokka's number one priority at all times. and although katara's support is invaluable to aang, that doesn't mean that their relationship is all giving and no receiving. he also supports her. he inspires her and helps her and would do anything for her. yes he's kind of awkward when it comes to navigating his feelings for her, but he's also twelve years old. and he's not a selfish monster. katara would not love him (platonically or romantically) if he were.

the idea that sokka isn't put in the position of being a substitute for everyone's parent but katara is doesn't make sense to me either. if anything, they take on equal responsibilities. and okay. sokka does not actually say that he sees his sister as a mother, but i do understand why that is a common interpretation of his speech in "the runaway." i just don't think it really makes sense to say that considering he never actually treats her like a mother. if he does see her as a mother, then why does he always treat her like a little sister? i'm not going to repeat my take on this scene since i've already discussed it enough, so just read this post.

^guy who sees his little sister, who is the most responsible girl in the world and never does anything reckless or irresponsible in the name of justice (no sir!), as his mom

i know i've talked about this before, but it makes me really sad when people diminish katara's character in a misguided attempt to defend her from racists/misogynists who unfairly malign her character. she should be defended, by all means, but erasing the traits that make her interesting and good, at sokka and aang's expense no less, is not the way to defend her. she is worthy of praise, but there is no need to remove entire chunks of her character and slander other characters to do so. i want more posts lauding katara for how amazing her character is, but i want those posts to be accurate. she deserves to be appreciated for her flaws as well as her virtues. she deserves to be honored properly.

#id in alt text #katara #this isnt really analysis it's more like #hot takes #sokka #aang #hakoda #katara&sokka #aang&katara #why cant ppl ever just defend and praise katara #w/o acting like she's some flawless mother who never makes mistakes #as if that would not make her a bad character. if she were.#sad!!!!!!!#sokka slander? also sad!#it's all. SAD

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sharpredclaws · 2 months

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Katara.

Ugh. Ok, let's get these thoughts out of my head before I scream.

Katara could be a frustrating character in the original show. She was bossy, overbearing, and controlling. But those traits all stemmed from the same source: her desire to protect others, and to change the world for the better.

When talking about her personality, the word often used is "angry". But I think there's something more to that, the real heart of her character.

Katara is passionate.

Passion, by nature, is a hard emotion to control. It is an intense emotion that compels action. She was angry about her mother's death, angry at her father for leaving them, angry at herself for not being able to master her bending, angry at the Fire Nation for everything it took from her. But more than that, she was driven to do something about it.

From the very first episode, she takes no shit and refuses to let anyone get in the way of doing what she sees as the right thing. Everything she feels, she feels intensely, and she struggles to control that intensity and what it drives her to do. And the show allows her to make mistakes. She trusts the wrong people, bosses the group around, lashes out at them. At its very worst, her passion turns to cruelty, and she’s good at being cruel. If you know how to heal, you also know how to cause pain. Being empathetic and compassionate also means you know exactly how to hurt someone’s feelings.

Water turns to blood.

The live action version of the show has stripped that away completely. This Katara is passive, meek, and lacks autonomy. When she does speak up for herself, it falls flat, because it lacks any show of backbone at any other point in the show. She can't even bend on her own until she meets Aang, a change I can't forgive. She deserved that moment to herself.

And you expect me to believe that this girl will learn to bloodbend?

Bloodbending is every flaw she has taken to extreme. It’s absolute control, turning people into puppets, the ability to bend and break a body however you please. It’s passion turned to domination, to hatred, to vengeance, to destruction.

Katara was a great character because her choice to be loving, nurturing, merciful, and in many ways traditionally feminine challenged the notion that those things are in some way easy or weak. They aren't. Loving people is terrifying, forgiving your enemies fucking hurts, that shit costs you. Caring so much you smother the very people you’re trying to nurture and protect, feeling so strongly you can’t act in moderation, was a compelling, logical arc for her.

I don’t understand what they’re trying to achieve with this new version of her character at all. The actress is doing her best with what they're giving her, but they're giving her nothing to work with.

#avatar the last airbender #katara

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puppiekit · 4 months

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To celebrate my Lion au post, here are some notes / hcs:

Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and Hollyleaf all have arcs that tackle different themes throughout the arc.

Jayfeathers arc tackles the prophecy-oriented side of things. His character changes the least. I do plan to tweak the way time travel works though (it will be more directly connected to their present - day tribe). Will keep up to date in that regard....

Hollyleafs character is, obviously, altered to an extent. She tackles the code-oriented side of things. She does not murder Ashfur, however..:

Hollyleaf is still driven mad by the truth of her heritage. She is angry at Leafpool first and foremost, viewing her as the root of their problem, as Leafpool was the one to break the code by having kits in the first place. She still confesses the truth at the gathering. She does not run into the tunnels, instead, somewhere more far off.....

After Ashfur is murdered, Lionblaze, wracked with guilt, confesses the crime to his siblings. Hollyleaf, blinded by her code-obsessed rage, later exposes the truth of what happened. Brambleclaw covers for him, similar to how Bramble covered Holly in the books.

Lionblazes character is altered the most (no surprise there). Lionblaze tackles the family-oriented side of things. He is very close to his parents, and you can see most of their drama / conflict through his perspective.

Lionblaze is a character who is simultaneously well-meaning, impulsive, and a bit self-focused. Similar to his grandfather he cares greatly for doing the right thing, even if it means breaking the code (much to Holly's disdain). However, what differs the two is Lionblazes hyper-awareness over his own reputation. Firestar is a cat who will do the right thing, no matter the slack he gets for it, no matter the enemies he makes. But Lionblaze is a cat who needs to be liked.

Due to the nature of his power, Lionblaze becomes increasingly insecure and hyper-aware of the cats around him (he views it as an inherent flaw ; a reason for cats NOT to like him). After his run-in with the Dark forest, he grows paranoid of accidentally harming / killing innocent cats. Frequent nightmares. Battle training sometimes induces panic. Bad habit of bringing home half-shredded prey. He wants to be a good cat, he wants to protect his clan and his family -- but his power only leaves him feeling like a monster. A ticking time bomb. All he's good for is doing the most damage possible, and that's scary to him.

Lions dynamic with Ashfur is expanded upon A LOT MORE. Now, in my au their dynamic is a bit of a mixed bag. They have their bad moments, days where Ashfurs resentment seeps through, but its not all bad. If you know the kind, you know -- The type of adult who will yell at you for a simple mistake, beat you down, but then 10 minutes later praise you and take you out for dinner as a treat. Its complex, it's hard to accept it for the toxicity it truly is, because "They're good sometimes, too". Lionblaze acknowledges that Ashfur was mean, but the attachment is still there. They had their good, genuine moments -- so it's hard to accept the fact that his mentor is a horrible person. Could it be? Could the mentor who told him funny stories about his parents, truly hate them that much? He can remember a time Ashfur peered down at him, smiled and said, "You know, Lionpaw, you're kind of like a son to me." In the moment he felt warm, it felt good. Did Ashfur really care for him that much? Now that same memory sends chills rippling through his fur.

Speaking of, Lionblaze is definitely the most attached of the three. He's incredibly close with Squirrelflight and Brambleclaw. When the truth is revealed, he is easily left the most (emotionally) devastated -- but he is also the first to forgive. He feels hurt, angry, betrayed, but he cannot deny the love he feels for his family, and he cannot deny the love they gave to him. It breaks his heart keeping his distance, seeing the hurt in his mothers eyes while he avoids their presence. He can't keep it up for long. Jayfeather, on the other hand, cant bring himself to forgive as quickly. He is a cat who has difficulty accepting vulnerability - he trusted his family, and that trust was betrayed. (Lion definitely has a bad habit of getting involved in his parents arguments later on lol hes emotionally invested)

The big change: Lionblaze kills Ashfur. You would think he does it out of anger, out of hatred, but no... He does it to keep his family safe. He can't let the secret get out. He can't allow Ashfur the opportunity to harm his littermates, his mother, again. Killing him was the only way, and yet, it leaves him with too much grief and guilt to bare. His entire life he shuddered at the idea of another cat dying at his claws. He was a monster, too strong for his own good, and killing would be nothing more than proof of that. It isn't long before it becomes too much to bare, and he confesses to his littermates. The grief, most of all, is what catches him by surprise. Ashfur was awful, he tried to kill Lionblaze and his littermates! It was wrong to feel this grief, wasn't it? But it isnt long before Lion realizes he wasnt grieving over Ashfur - he was grieving over who he thought Ashfur was; not only his mentor, but a tom who cared for him, despite the short attitude. Not only is his heritage, his upbringing a lie - but so is the very nature of his entire apprenticeship. It is a lot for him to handle.

#wc #warrior cats #warriors #thunderclan #lionblaze #hollyleaf #jayfeather #ashfur #squirrelflight #leafpool #brambleclaw #wc au #warrior cats au #warriors au #wc headcanon #warrior cats headcanons

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morallyinept · 6 months

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Hey, D. How are you doing buddy?

I see. Feeling a bit down in the dumps, huh?

Well, I've got just the thing for you, handsome...

No... it's not that, D. 🙄

No, this week we're going to have a look at how you can show yourself some self-compassion. Something that is better than, uh... that.

What? Showing yourself some self-compassion is a great thing to do. Well, yes, so is that... okay.

Yes. You've made your point. Okay fine. Jeez... Take your pants off... 🥲

Hold tight, it's Self-Care With Dieter & Jett time!

So, D, have you ever lost your temper at… yourself?

Blamed and then beat yourself up a little inside for doing something you regret, even if in the grand scheme of things, it was something relatively small?

And how did you cope with that afterwards, D?

Hmm. Probably wasn't the wisest idea, was it?

Nah. Didn't think so. Clean up this time, okay? 🤨

It’s easy to be tough on yourself when things go wrong or you feel stressed - and spend hours kissing the bottom of the toilet, too - we tend to do it to ourselves a lot, much more than we actually realize.

But what if there's a better way? 🤔

In the heat of the moment, or during a crisis, no matter how big or small, it's easy to self sabotage. Convince ourselves we're the problem, or even caused a problem to exist. That we're stupid, not talented, or just not worth having around.

And none of that is true, my friends.

Our inner critic has its best intentions for us – maybe it wants us to be safe, to contribute, to succeed, to belong.

Granted, the good intention is often, heavily veiled under a belittling tone. When you think back to a moment where you were especially hard on yourself, can you conjure up the message you heard? What was the tone? If you could give your inner critic a physical face, what would it look like?

When we forgive ourselves, accept our perceived flaws, and show ourselves some much needed kindness, we practice self-compassion.

Having self-compassion means being able to relate to yourself in a way that’s forgiving, accepting, and loving when situations might be fraught, worrisome or stressful.

If you ever judge or criticize yourself for no justifiable reason, you might find some of the below techniques helpful in showing yourself some kindness and self-compassion.

Treat Yourself As You’d Treat A Friend

One good place to start is by thinking about how you would treat others that you care about. Think about how you'd offer support to a friend who is feeling down or upset.

You'd comfort them, right? Offer them some assuring words, maybe even a hug?

You wouldn't kick them when they're down-

D!! That's not helpful! 🤨

No. Don't argue with me. You'll lose, bud. 😎

Whilst we can’t always take away other people's pain, we can validate it and provide support to help them get through it.

The same can be said for yourself.

Validate your feelings and accept that it's okay to feel like this. Give yourself a reassuring word or two, take a few deep breaths, and wrap your arms around yourself figuratively, and literally. A self-hug can be very healing and reassuring.

Understand Your Reactions

Think about how you would react in a situation when someone else does it. For example, your friend doesn't call when they say they will. You don't get mad, or fly off the hook, right?

Or maybe you do... Sorry, D. I just forgot. 😬

No, I didn't go out to the movies with Ezra. That was last week... Oops.

We had a great time, FYI... 😏

There could be a valid reason why they can't call. Perhaps there's an emergency, or a situation beyond their control? You won't instantly assume they're a bad person, so why are you doing that to yourself?

Ground yourself in the moment and rationalise. You are not a bad person.

Learn From Your Mistakes

When something inevitably goes wrong, we focus too much on the negative. Too much on the uh-oh factor. Meaning we always look at the negatives in a situation and how it impacts us negatively.

Making mistakes is what makes us human. Learning from them is what makes us grow. If we never made mistakes, we wouldn't have life-experience.

Try not to judge yourself too quickly.

Think about what you have learnt from the experience and what you can take away from it, rather than focusing on the negatives. Look for the positives. How can you better equip yourself so next time it happens (if it happens again) you can be prepared? What lesson have you taken away from it?

Take a deep breath and move on. It's in the past now. You can only move forward.

Get Some Perspective

When something bad happens, it always feels like the end of the world, doesn't it? That no-one could relate or possibly be going through what we're experiencing.

And to some degree, that is true. Your crisis is different from another's and affects you differently. But reminding yourself that things aren't all completely doom and gloom can help.

Personally, when I feel down, I try to remember that I'm healthy, that I have friends, I am creative, I have a roof over my head, etc... making a list of all the positives things - even if it's a mental list, and even if they are small things - in your life, can help you regain some perspective away from the negative and help to ground you again.

Reach Out To Others

A problem shared, is a problem halved, right, D?

Uh, D? Honestly, I cannot take you anywhere... 😒

When we talk with others, friends, family, colleagues or even someone professional if we need it, we realize that we’re not alone in feeling pain.

That we are not the only one's gong through it and this can help us gain perspective.

You are not alone.

It’s an important part of reaffirming our sense of being connected, reframing the ‘bigger picture’, and building a social support network that is invaluable to our wellbeing and growth.

Reach out when things go wrong and ask for advice. Ask for feedback too.

Perhaps someone else's perspective of the situation might convince you, and offer validation, that actually, you handled it pretty well and shouldn't be so hard on yourself.

Ditch The Guilt

Self-care is just as important as caring for others. Some would even argue it's more important.

Think about this; how can you expect to give adequate care to someone else, if you don't care for yourself first?

I know, thought provoking, isn't it, D? 💡

Research shows that people who practice self-compassion are found to be more caring, more affectionate and considerate according to their partners, resulting in more romantic relationships; have more acceptance of their own partner's imperfections, and are more likely to compromise when there is conflict.

So you can see why showing yourself some kindness and self-compassion can spread positively into your personal relationships in your life too.

Self-compassion has also been found as key in the fight for injustices, such as equality; including sexual, racial and disability. This is because self-compassion strengthens our personal accountability, and in turn we're more receptive to showing compassion to others.

Self compassion allows us to be more emotionally resilient in times of success and adversity. It helps us assess situations more objectively and supports us in making sound decisions that we won't regret or worry about later.

So, when was the last time you showed yourself some self-compassion, D?

No. That, is not showing self-compassion... No I don't need a lesson.

Put that away... I-

Oh, Dieter... 🤤

Wait, where did you learn moves like that?!

Alexa. Play "We Got The Moves" by Electric Callboy... 😏

Dieter and I hope we helped enlighten you on how to show yourself some self-compassion this week. Remember, be kind to yourself, always.

Until next time, stay kind & stay creamy. 🖤

YOU. ARE. STRONGER. THAN. YOU. THINK. 🖤

Do you. Then do Dieter.

More Dieter & Jett love here

ℹ️ Dieter and I always strive to bring you unbiased, fact-checked advice. We're not licensed therapists, so we do a lot of research to ensure we can provide helpful and informative posts. Well, I do. Dieter mostly sits around eating KitKats.

#self care with dieter and jett #dieter bravo #ezra prospect #dieter bravo the bubble #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #jett's pedro boys #you are stronger than you think #do you #then do dieter #self-compassion #be kind #positivity

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